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"Rhythms of Darkness!": A Furmanism in every bite!

Transformers writer Simon Furman is infamous among fans for dialogue concepts that are frequently retrod. Such repeated phrases are known informally as Furmanisms.

Contents

Various Furmanisms

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When indulging in Furmanisms, make sure to find a private area and remember to lock the door.

A SHORT, SHARP LESSON

A WHOLE WORLD OF PAIN!

  • "Below the surface of the Transformers' homeworld, below Cybertron's long-disused sewer system, there is... Underworld. A world of towering, twisted metal screaming at shadows that writhe in unholy silence embracing the unwary in circuit-chilling tendrils of mist. A WHOLE WORLD OF PAIN AND HURT." —Narrator, "Underworld!"
  • "Get ready, quite literally... for a whole WORLD of pain!" —Starscream, "Dark Shadows!"
  • "Because out there it's a world of PAIN and HURT and we just weren't ready..." —Bluestreak, The War Within #1
  • "It's about PAIN, Megatron... here's a whole WORLD of it!" —Starscream again, The War Within #3
  • "Somewhere else...a world of PAIN." —Narration, "Abduction"
  • "I see a frightened little girl...in a world of hurt and pain." —Social worker in reference to Verity Carlo, Infiltration #4
  • "DINOBOT MONTH! And Grimlock wishes it wasn't! His quest for a means to restore his ability to change modes takes him to Nebulos—where an incendiary welcome awaits him. Plus, Kup and the Wreckers find themselves hunted and in a whole world of pain—literally!" —Slightly tongue-in-cheek solicit for Regeneration One issue #82.

ALL THE DIRTY JOBS

CAN I DO LESS?

  • "NO! While I function I will do everything in my power to thwart you. As an Autobot I can do no less!" —Ultra Magnus, "Target: 2006"
  • "As long as life remains in me, I will do everything in my power to save him. I can do no less!" —Optimus Prime, "Under Fire!"
  • "But both Wreck-Gar and Inferno sacrificed themselves to save me. Can I do any less than risk my life to AVENGE them?" —Smokescreen, "The Legacy of Unicron!"
  • "Always lived life in the FAST LANE -- guess you DIED that way, too! Can we do any less?" —Jazz, "Life in the Slow Lane"
  • "I've stood here and watched humans -- frail flesh creatures -- fight and die for their world. CAN I DO LESS?" —Jazz, "Rhythms of Darkness!"
  • "You are WRONG! You were ready to sacrifice yourself to save my family. CAN I DO LESS FOR YOU?" —Jose, "A Savage Place!"
  • "Kup, there's got to be another way! Ratchet sacrificed everything to save us -- can we do less?" —Sureshot, "The Pri¢e of Life!"
  • "The real Scorponok wouldn't have turned and fled! He'd have accepted his responsibilities, his FATE! Can I then do less?" —Scorponok, "On the Edge of Extinction!"
  • "Autobots--one last charge! Those...creatures are fighting and dying for Cybertron! Can we do less?" —Ultra Magnus rallies the troops with a (knowingly) Furmanism-filled battle cry, "Destiny, Part Five"

CANNOT, WILL NOT

DIE SCREAMING

DOWN TO EARTH--LITERALLY!

FIGHT AND DIE

  • "Better to go, to run, to try — than just sit here and wait to die!" —Wheelie flips this one on its head, "Space Pirates!"
  • "Yeah. Better to FIGHT AND DIE-- than live with the knowledge that I ran!" —Jazz, "Rhythms of Darkness!"
  • "We're Dinobots; we stick together, FIGHT together -- and DIE together, if necessary! Better that than live with the knowledge that we turned and ran, abandoned a comrade!" —Swoop, "Still Life!"
  • "What of it? Better to die a warrior's death than endure this mockery of life!" —Crankcase, "The Fall and Rise of the Decepticon Empire."
  • "Better to die a hero than live as a coward." —Narration, "Salvage!"
  • "Hold still, relic... Better to stand and die than perish in ignominous flight!" —Random Generation 2 Cybertronian chasing Tracks, "Total War!"
  • "Despite everything, I do not understand why we fight and die for this world." —Optronix, The War Within #1
  • "For years, we fight and die...and for WHAT? To run, hide?" —Grimlock, The War Within #2
  • "Autobots--one last charge! Those...creatures are fighting and dying for Cybertron! Can we do less?" —Ultra Magnus drops two Furmanisms at once, "Destiny, Part Five"

IT CAN BE HURT

  • "He's not invincible! He can be hurt!" —Buster, "Robot Buster!"
  • "Springer's right! If they can hurt... they can BE HURT!" —Inferno, "Survivors!"
  • "This is no demon, no ghost! It is metal and circuitry! It can feel pain -- IT CAN BE HURT!" —Optimus Prime, "Skin Deep"
  • "Concentrate your fire! It has FORM, it has SUBSTANCE... it can be DESTROYED!" —Mindset, "Swarm"
  • "Whatever that thing is, it has mass, it has substance... IT CAN BE DESTROYED!" —Jhiaxus, "A Rage in Heaven!"
  • "Ultimately, Megatron is argonized steel and polymer sinew, just like us. He can be HURT... He can be KILLED..." —Starscream, Infiltration #6

IT IS OVER -- FINISHED!

IT NEVER ENDS

LIKE SOME PREDATORY BIRD

  • "Bird of Prey!" —title of Marvel US #62
  • "Like some sleek, deadly bird of prey, Thunderwing dropped towards Yuss's Amprodome — a bowl-like structure housing its treasured antiquities — and dropped the thermo-charge." —"The Magnificent Six!"
  • "I now believe a SECOND menace exists, one that hovers like some predatory bird at the edge of my consciousness." —Optimus Prime, "Devices and Desires!"
  • "Ahead, hovering like some vast, predatory bird on the fringes of Fahl Space... the Decepticon flagship, Twilight--" —Narration, "New Dawn"
  • "Like some dread bird of prey, Megatron would hang suspended in the upper atmosphere, raining lightning bolts down on enemy emplacements while his drone (ground) troopers picked off any who attempted to flee or fight back." —Description of Megatron's vehicle mode, Transformers: The Movie Guide

NEVER DID WANT TO LIVE FOREVER!

NO ONE GETS OUT ALIVE!

NO! YOU'RE DEAD!

POWER BEYOND MEASURE

  • "He is Megatron to the ultimate degree--POWERFUL AND EVIL BEYOND MEASURE!" —Narrator, "Time Wars"
  • "Unicron is powerful beyond measure, a fallen god!" —Optimus Prime, "Surrender!"
  • "FLEE! Power beyond MEASURE thiss one! Hiss light-- hurts!" —A Demon, "Still Life!"
  • "And somewhere in time, as a lone, humbled Predacon runs for his life, he fancies he hears a dark voice, whispering promises of POWER BEYOND MEASURE." —Narrator, "Terminus"
  • "H-HK! POWER...beyond measure, but-- GNN-AAHH!" —Megatron, "Fire & Ice"
  • "I offer FORBIDDEN fruit, timelost secrets, power...BEYOND MEASURE!" —The Fallen, "Fragmentation"

REAP THE WHIRLWIND[1][2]

  • "Our sins remembered, final judgment pronounced. The heavens opened, and we reaped, I say... REAPED THE WHIRLWIND." —Spinister, "Worlds Collide, Part 2 of 4"
  • "When you posted me to this backwater rock in space, you were sowing the seeds of your OWN destruction! Now... REAP THE WHIRLWIND!" —Starscream, Infiltration #6
  • "We saw the signs, the portents--the dark clouds gathering on our horizons. And yet we averted our eyes, pretended it wasn't coming. And in doing so we unleashed a storm of even greater magnitude, one that so very nearly destroyed us all. And now, it seems... others shall REAP THE WHIRLWIND." —Optimus Prime's inner monologue, Stormbringer #2
  • "Now... REAP THE WHIRLWIND!" —One of several generic Optimus Prime dialogue options during character deployment, Transformers: Earth Wars

SURPLUS TO REQUIREMENTS

THE WORST CASE OF INDIGESTION IT'S EVER HAD

TIME I MADE A STAND!

TIME I WASN'T HERE!

WELL AND TRULY

WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT?

WHAT CHANCE DO WE HAVE?

YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE THINGS I CAN DO NOW!

Notes

  • Furman also uses repeated sound effects. Grimlock gives a stellar example of some favourites during The War Within as he chases after Prime and Megatron. SPOOM! used to be quite common, although it has stopped appearing since some fans decided it was so awesome that they asked Simon in person to use it more. Thankfully though, Transformers still have a tendency to die with a good ol' SHEEAAAGH!, more than once preceded by a truncated "Got to—" as their final words.
  • Even Furman's non-canonical works are not immune to Furmanisms. In the pseudocanonical story "The Last Days of Optimus Prime" Megatron uses the phrase "It never ends."
  • Furman himself is wryly aware of his frequently repeated phrases, and even refers to them as Furmanisms.[3][4]
  • In the "Shattered Expectations" April Fools comic, Goldbug uses a reverse Furmanism: "Once we have this secret technology the Decepticon insurgency will be FINISHED... OVER!" He later uses it (for real) in "Eye in the Sky". In later parts of the Shattered Glass universe, the Furmanisms begin getting not only flipped but fully mirrored.
  • Fisitron uses Fisitronisms in his Wreckers: Declassified datalogs. Skyfall chides the author for overusing certain phrases, but Fisitron notes that after 331 datalogs one is bound to start repeating oneself. Bullets

References

  1. Book of Hosea 8:7
  2. In an amusing coincidence, this Furmanism appears in Michael Bay's The Rock
  3. Simon Furman referring to Furmanisms in a post on his blog.
  4. THE END! Though, as I've been known to say, "It never ends!" - You Can Draw Transformers
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