Jerry Seinfeld

Jerome Allen "Jerry" Seinfeld (born April 29, 1954) is an American comedian, actor, writer, and producer. He is best known for portraying a semifictional version of himself in the sitcom Seinfeld (1989–1998), which he co-created and co-wrote with Larry David. For its final two seasons, they were also co-executive producers.

Seinfeld also co-wrote and co-produced the 2007 animated film Bee Movie, in which he voiced the protagonist. In 2010 he premiered a reality series called The Marriage Ref. He directed Colin Quinn in the Broadway show Long Story Short at the Helen Hayes Theater, which ran until January 2011. He is also the creator and host of the web series Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee.

In his stand-up comedy career, Seinfeld is known for specializing in observational humor, often focusing on personal relationships and uncomfortable social obligations. In 2005 Comedy Central named him the 12th-greatest stand-up comedian of all time.

Early life

Seinfeld was born in Brooklyn, New York. His father, Kalmen Seinfeld (1918–1985), was born to a Jewish immigrant from Kherson Oblast in southern Ukraine. His mother, Betty (née Hosni; born 1914), is of Syrian Jewish descent; her parents Selim and Salha Hosni were from Aleppo. Seinfeld grew up in Massapequa, New York, and attended Massapequa High School on Long Island. At the age of 16, he spent time volunteering in Kibbutz Sa'ar in Israel. He later attended State University of New York at Oswego; after his second year, he transferred to Queens College, City University of New York, graduating with a degree in communications and theater.

Jerry Seinfeld (character)

Jerome "Jerry" Seinfeld is the protagonist of the American television sitcom Seinfeld (19891998). The straight man among his group of friends, this semi-fictionalized version of comedian Jerry Seinfeld was named after, co-created by, based on, and played by Seinfeld himself. The series revolves around Jerry's misadventures with his best friend George Costanza, neighbor Cosmo Kramer, and ex-girlfriend Elaine Benes. He is usually the voice of reason amidst his friends' antics and the focal point of the foursome's relationship.

An eternal optimist, he rarely runs into major personal problems. Jerry is the only main character on the show to maintain the same career (a stand-up comedian, like the real Seinfeld) throughout the series. He is the most observational character, sarcastically commenting on his friends' quirky habits. Much of the show's action takes place in Jerry's apartment located at 129 West 81st Street, apartment 5A. He and his friends also frequent Monk's Café. Jerry appeared in all 180 episodes of Seinfeld (including several two-part episodes), holding the distinction of being the only character in the show to appear in every episode.

Podcasts:

Famous quotes by Jerry Seinfeld:

"Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason"
"You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, "See if you can blow this out.""
"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy."
"Seems to me the basic conflict between men and women, sexually, is that men are like firemen. To men, sex is an emergency, and no matter what we're doing we can be ready in two minutes. Women, on the other hand, are like fire. They're very exciting, but the conditions have to be exactly right for it to occur.""
"The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever see that little Swiss Army knife they have to fight with? Not much of a weapon there. Corkscrews, Bottle openers. 'Come on, buddy, let's go. You get past me, the guy in back of me, he's got a spoon. Back off. I've got the toe clippers right here."
"There is no such thing as fun for the whole family."
"Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash."
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked.""
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
"I am so busy doing nothing... that the idea of doing anything - which as you know, always leads to something - cuts into the nothing and then forces me to have to drop everything."
PLAYLIST TIME:

Jerry Seinfeld

by: Jerry Seinfeld

One thing I do like of being down there with the old
people is that it makes me feel like I'm little again,
like a little kid. And when you're a kid, you can eat
amazing amounts of food. And all just candy, that's all
I ate when I was a kid. The only thought I had, growing
up, was "get... candy". That was my only thought, in my
brain, for the 10 years of human life. Just get candy,
get candy, get candy, get candy, get candy, get candy.
Family, friends, school, these were just obstacles in
the way of getting more candy. That's why you had to
teach kids not to take candy from strangers, if they're
playing in a playground. And they can barely understand
"Don't..."
"No candy ?... From... strangers ? Alright. Candy,
strangers, no candy. Alright, because otherwise I'm
taking the candy, anywhere I can get it".
There's such candy moron, idiot brains, "if this man
has candy I'm going with him, goodbye, don't care what
happens to me. Get candy, get candy, get candy".
"No, don't go, they'll torture you, they'll kidnap you
"It doesn't matter, he has an 'Oh Henry', I have to
take that chance. Get candy, get candy, get candy".
So the first time you hear the concept of Halloween,
when you're a kid, remember the first time you even
heard about it, it's like... your brain can't even...
"what is this ?! Who's giving out candy, someone's
giving out candy ?! Who is giving out this candy ?!
Everyone that we know is just giving out candy ?!!! I
gotta be a part of this, take me with you, I wanna do
it, I'll do anything that they want...!
I can wear that ! I'll wear anything that I have to
wear. I'll do anything I have to do. I will get the
candy from these fools ! That are so stupidly giving it
away".
So the first couple of years I made my own costume.
They of course, sucked. Ghost, hobo, no good. So I'm
begging the parents "you gotta get me one of the ones
from the store, the cardboard box, the cellophane top.
So one year, third year, finally got a Superman
costume... not surprisingly. "Mask included in the set
!". Remember the rubber band, on the back of that mask,
that was a quality item there, wasn't it ? That was
good for about 10 seconds, before it snapped out of
that cheap little staple they put it in there with. The
thinnest grey rubber in the world. You go to your first
house "trick or -snap- it broke, I don't believe it".
"Wait up, I gotta fix it, you guys. Come on. Wait up".
That's a kid thing, "wait up". Kids don't want other
kids to wait, they must "wait up". "Would you wait up
?". Because when you're little, life is up, you're
growing up, everything is up. "Wait up, hold up, shut
up !". "Ma, I'm all cleaned up !". "Let me stay up !".
Parents, of course, it's just the opposite, "just calm
down !". "Slow down !". "Come down here, sit down, put
that down !". "You are grounded !". "Keep it down in
there !".
So I had my Superman Halloween costume, I was
physically ready, I was mentally prepared. And I
assumed, when I put this costume on, I would probably
look exactly like the Superman I had come to know on
television and in the movies.
Now you remember these costumes, it's not exactly the
super-fit !... That you are hoping for ! You look more
like you're wearing Superman's pajamas, it's what you
look like. It's all loose, and flowing... neck line
kinda comes down to about there... (laughs) and you got
that flimsy little ribbon string holding it together in
the back... of course my mother makes me wear my winter
coat over the costume anyway...!
"I don't recall Superman wearing a jacket".
So you're going out there, you know, and the mask keeps
breaking, so the rubber band keeps getting shorter, and
keeps making it tighter and tighter on your face... you
can't even see... you're trying to breathe through
that, remember that little hole, it gets all sweaty in
there (imitates very deep breath) .... .... .... And
the mask starts slicing into your eyeballs, "I can't
see, I can't breathe, but you gotta get the candy,
let's keep going !".
About a half-hour into it, you take that mask, "oh, the
hell with it !". (imitates doorbell) "Bing Bong", "It's
me, gimme the candy !". "I'm Superman, look at the pant
legs, whatta hell is the difference !"
Remember those last few Halloweens, getting a little
too old for it. Just kind of going through the motions.
"Bing Bong", "come on lady, let's go. Halloween,
doorbells, candy, let's pick up the pace in there".
They come at the door, they always ask you those same
stupid questions:
"What are you supposed to be ?"
"I'm supposed to be done by now, you wanna move it
along, the Three Musketeers... ? I got 18 houses on
this block alone. You just hit the bag, we hit the
road, that's the routine, let's just pick it up".
Sometimes they gave you that little white bag, twisted
on the top, you know that's gonna be some crap candy.
It's gotta have those official Halloween markings on
it. "Hold it lady, wait a second, what is this, the
orange marshmallow shaped like a big peanut ? Do me a
favour, you keep that one. Yeah, we got all the door-
stops we need already, thank you very much. We're going
for name candy only, this year".
And I think about how I used to eat, when I was a kid.
I remember Halloween I would get, you know, I would
have like a punch-bowl, and I would fill it with candy.
The top of it would be curved, that's how much candy. I
would consume that entire punch-bowl, that night ! Next




Latest News for: Jerry Seinfeld

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50% of the world's richest are from these 3 countries. Check full list

Hindustan Times 06 Apr 2025
... Billionaires ranking this year, including celebrities such as rockstar Bruce Springsteen ($1.2 billion), movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger ($1.1 billion), and comedian Jerry Seinfeld ($1.1 billion).
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‘We’d been through so much’: Jean Hannah Edelstein on breasts – and life without them

The Guardian 06 Apr 2025
My breasts were real, and they were spectacular. That’s a Seinfeld reference, if you’re not familiar. Seinfeld was one of the shows that I watched often in my adolescent years when my breasts first asserted themselves ... ....
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Tennessee's Chaz Lanier wins Jerry West Award as best shooting guard

The Maryville Daily Times 06 Apr 2025
Tennessee basketball's Chaz Lanier is the 2024-25 Jerry West Award winner, as revealed Saturday afternoon, live on ESPN College GameDay ....
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O'Neil, Jerome H. "Jerry"

St Louis Post-Dispatch 06 Apr 2025
JeromeJerryHilary O’Neil, Sr. of St. Louis, Missouri, passed away peacefully on February 18, 2025, at St. Agnes Home in Kirkwood, Missouri. He was 94 ... .
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Passing Game Highlights KSU Spring Scrimmage

Marietta Daily Journal 06 Apr 2025
KENNESAW -- Kennesaw State fans got a peak at the new offense it will run under new coach Jerry Mack on Saturday, and it appears as if it will involve a lot of throws down the field ... .
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Gerald "Jerry" Gene Bruce

Corvallis Gazette-Times 06 Apr 2025
Gerald Gene BruceJerry – of Lebanon, Oregon, passed away on March 27, 2025. Born on August 24, 1940 in Dalton, Nebraska, he was married for three decades to Joy Bruce, also of Lebanon. Together they raised three children ... .
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Walters: Newsom touts career master plan as his governorship begins to wind down

VC Star 06 Apr 2025
When Jerry Brown began his first governorship 50 years ago, he staffed his new administration with social and economic reform activists from left-of-center organizations ... writing a book, “Jerry Brown.
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Lindor's sacrifice fly caps Mets' 3-2 comeback win over Blue Jays

North Shore News 06 Apr 2025
Jose Siri drew a one-out walk in the ninth against Nick Sandlin (0-1), went to second base on a wild pitch and was held at third on Luis Torrens’ single ... It was the seventh career walk-off RBI for Lindor ... KEY MOMENT ... Jerry Beach, The Associated Press. .
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7-time Pro Bowl wide receiver retires from NFL

Michigan Live 06 Apr 2025
Jones totaled more receiving yards, yards after the catch and first downs off a reception than any other player in the league during his time with the Falcons and he passed Jerry Rice as the fastest ...
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Lindor's sac fly caps Mets' 3-2 comeback win over Blue Jays after Winker's 2-run triple in the 8th

North Shore News 06 Apr 2025
Jose Siri drew a one-out walk in the ninth against Nick Sandlin (0-1), went to second base on a wild pitch and was held at third on Luis Torrens’ single ... It was the seventh career walk-off RBI for Lindor ... Key moment ... Jerry Beach, The Associated Press. .
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Ted Cruz warns of midterm ‘bloodbath’ if Trump tariffs cause a recession

The Observer 06 Apr 2025
“A hundred years ago, the US economy didn’t have the leverage to have the kind of impact we do now ... The Republican senators Lisa Murkowski, Mitch McConnell, Jerry Moran and Thom Tillis have since signed on as co-sponsors ... “That’s a great outcome.” ... .
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Steve Matthews' Aqueduct selections for Thursday, April 10

Newsday 06 Apr 2025
Best bet. COLLECT DATTT (1). Best value. GRACEFUL ROSE (5). FIRST ... Maggie T, another last-race winner, owns positional speed; dangerous ... Jerry's Out owns speed and fast figures; right in the thick of this.By Steve Matthewssteve.matthews@newsday.com.
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Where to watch Duke vs. Houston in 2025 Final Four: TV channel, tip time, odds, ...

CBS Sports 06 Apr 2025
Saturday's second national semifinal showdown in San Antonio at the Final Four will see No. 1 seed Duke face No. 1 seed Houston in a rematch of last year's Sweet 16 clash won by the Blue Devils ... 2 seed Alabama ... 2 seed Tennessee ... Kyle Boone ... ET ... Jerry Palm ... .
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Italy tightened its citizenship laws. The country’s diaspora feels betrayed.

The Spokesman-Review 06 Apr 2025
Every month for nearly three years, Jerry Lombardo and his wife had set aside part of their paychecks toward their dream of moving to Italy to start a business ... “Up until last week, you are told that you have the right to citizenship.
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