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Kung Fu Hustle

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Kung Fu Hustle is a 2005 film about two hapless conmen on the streets of 1940s Shanghai who pretend to be the members of the ruthless Axe Gang. Their extortion scheme fails when the victims fight back, and the plot thickens when the real Axe Gang shows up. Meanwhile, the run-down tenement that is being attacked, the Pig Sty, turns out to count amongst its residents superhuman kung-fu fighters.

Directed by Stephen Chow. Written by Tsang Kan Cheong, Stephen Chow, Xin Huo and Chan Man Keung

Sing

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  • [To ice cream vendor] What're you looking at? Never seen an ice cream thief before? [Runs away without paying, laughing maniacally]
  • [Shouting while puncturing football] No more soccer!

Landlady

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  • How come you became righteous? Have you anything to say? [Sing draws a stick of candy on the ground with his blood] I can't read it, it's not in Chinese!
  • [To tailor] What's with the red underwear?
  • You may know kung fu... but you're still a fairy.

The Beast

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  • In the world of kung fu, speed defines the winner.
  • Don't get me wrong! I only want to kill you, or be killed by you.
  • It's just a title.(Referring to the name The Beast)
  • This doesn't make any sense at all.

Other

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Axe Gang Advisor: Let's kill them all and make this place a brothel!

Dialogue

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Brother Sum: Ever killed anyone?
Sing: I've always thought about it.

Bone: You gave him your life savings?
Sing: Yes. I was saving to become a doctor or lawyer... but this was a chance at world peace.

Sing: [feelingly] I realized then that good guys never win. I want to be bad. I want to be a ruthless killer!
Bone: [looks up] Ice cream!
[He leaves]
Sing: Where?
[He follows]

Bone: Memories can be painful. To forget may be a blessing!
Sing: [amazed] I never knew you were so deep.

Axe Gang Advisor: So that makes you the best killers in circulation, right?
Harpist #1: In actuality, we are just a pair of street musicians.

Barber: Why don't you train us to be top fighters... and we'll avenge them!
Landlady: Becoming a top fighter takes time, unless you're a natural-born kung-fu genius, and they're 1 in a million.
Barber: [Doing martial arts routine] It's obvious I'm the one!
Landlady: [Punches him in the face, knocking him to the floor] Don't think so.

[After Sing defeats him with the Buddhist Palm technique]
The Beast: What is the name of your technique?
Sing: Do you want to learn? I will teach you.

Donut: [in English] What are you prepared to do?
Landlord: We can't understand what you're saying!

Landlord: [commenting on Sing's martial arts techniques] If he studies hard, he could be a doctor or a lawyer.
Landlady: A stuntman, more likely.

Taglines

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  • A New Comedy Unlike Anything You Have Seen Before.
  • So Many Gangsters... So Little Time.
  • From Walking Disaster To Kung Fu Master.

Cast

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Lyrics

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    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 HM.....
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 
    只有逛逛被遺忘了的街頭
    數數口袋裡賸餘的溫柔
    假裝妳仍然躺在我的胸口
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候
    日子怎麼變得好難過
    三百六十五天用不完的時間
    都沒有能夠讓我快樂的發現
  *如果生命只是一種等待
    為了證明愛的存在
    如果失去妳是暫時的悲哀
    又為何多少年仍渴望你回來
    如果相愛是一種無奈
    就讓我倆能回到這無奈
    我的感覺想妳能明白
    無止境的等待
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候
    心裡總會覺得好後悔
    沒有好好說句動聽的話
    再一次把妳破碎的心挽回
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候
    心裡難過得說不出口
    DOOH.....DAH.....
    重唱 *,*
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候 HM.....
    DOOH.....DAH.....
    如果沒有妳在身邊的時候
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