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Talk:Cold Case Love/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Et3rnal (talk · contribs) 16:16, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Lead
  • "who labeled the song as a highlight and stand-out song on Rated R and additionally praised Rihanna's vocals" → "who labeled the song as a highlight on Rated R, additionally praising Rihanna's vocals." – 'highlight' and 'stand-out' together is a little redundant, sentence should also have a break.
  • "Following the assault of Rihanna's boyfriend Chris Brown on her" → "Following Chris Brown's assault on Rihanna"
 DoneTomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Composition and lyrical interpretation
  • "no matter what song Rihanna released as the lead single from the record, it would immediately be looked at as a song about Brown." → "it would immediately be looked at as referring to Brown". – To avoid repetition of song.
  • "should expect an edgier and angrier Rihanna on the album" – Probably should quote 'edgier' and 'angrier', as it's a bit WP:POV on their own.
  • "was written by Justin Timberlake, Robin Tadross and James Fauntleroy II and produced by the three of them by their production name The Y's." → "was written by Justin Timberlake, Robin Tadross and James Fauntleroy II and produced by the latter three under their production name The Y's."
  • "Timberlake told MTV News that the Rated R is a whole new sound" – Remove 'the'.
  • "Rihanna admitted that "Cold Case Love" was inspired by her hard relationship" – 'difficult' would be a better choice of wording, less colloquial.
  • "served as Tovar's assistant recording engineers, while, Antonio" – omit the second comma.
  • "to fully emote, to show the feeling behind the stance." – Probably should quote this, and it's again a bit POVish.
  • "Rihanna seems to discover the flip side" – should also quote this, same reason as the previous point.
  • "Jody Rosen of Rolling Stone wrote Rihanna sings 'slow-boiling' the line 'What you did to me was a crime'." – This doesn't make sense.
  • "A reviewer of Plugged In wrote that the lyrics that allude to are "And I let you reach me one more time/But that’s enough." → that allude to this are.
  • "Jon Pareless of The New York Times wrote that Rihanna compares the love – I don't understand what 'the love' is referring to. The sentence in general needs some clarification.
  • "and features the couplet" – replace and with 'which'.
 DoneTomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]
References

15. GQ and Plugged In should have their publisher in brackets.

22. Hearst Magazines UK should be linked.

23. IAC (company) should be About.com's publisher.

27. 'Rap-Up, LLC' are Rap-Up's publisher.

 DoneTomíca(T2ME) 17:42, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Article looks good overall, putting on hold. Et3rnal 17:06, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Everything addressed. Passing. Et3rnal 20:26, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you buddy! — Tomíca(T2ME) 20:40, 16 June 2013 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.