Understanding Student Behavior

Understanding Student Behavior

Understanding students' behavior, and misbehavior, is often a challenge even for the most experienced teachers.

Why does Alan seek to disrupt the class by talking while the instructor is lecturing? Why does Betty become helpless in the face of a two-page written assignment? Why does Carl answer her teacher with such smoldering disrespect? Why does Danielle spend all of her time Instant Messaging in class?

Understanding Student Behavior

The answers to these questions will give us important information about how we can best influence students to give up such misbehavior and Instead look for cooperative, responsible ways to achieve their goals

Understanding Behavior: Purpose Not Cause

To understand another person's behavior, it does little good to look back and try to figure out what caused it Human beings have free will We choose how to behave based on our experience, values and goals for the future

Understanding Behavior: Purpose Not Cause

So to understand why people, including students, behave the way they do, we always want to ask ourselves,

"What is their goal? What payoff is their behavior aimed at getting?"

Understanding Behavior: Purpose Not Cause

For example, Why does Danielle spend all of her time Instant Messaging in class?

What was her purpose or goal? Does her behavior get her the payoff she wants?

To answer these questions, we want to look four basic goals of all student's behavior,

Then see which one Danielle might achieve through her behavior.

Four Goals of Student Behavior

Four Goals of Student Behavior

Building on the foundation laid by Rudolf Dreikurs and expanded on by Michael Popkin Todays presentation suggests that there are four goals basic to human survival and the ability to thrive. These same four goals also govern behavior:

Contact Power Protection Withdrawal

Contact

The basic need of every human being is to belong

A baby could not survive without others to depend upon Neither could the human species have survived throughout history without belonging to various groups:

families, communities, cities, states and nations, etc.

Contact

Out of this desire to belong, each of us develops the goal of making contact physical or emotionalwith other human beings

The group setting and activities found in a classroom provide a student many opportunities to make contact and develop a sense of belonging

Student organizations, residence halls, athletics, religious organizations and other institutions offer additional opportunities

Power

Each one of us wants to influence our environment and gain at least a measure of control over it We would like for things to go our way; we want the power to make that happen.

It is through learning that we become able to do this

Protection

We must be able to protect ourselves

Our instinct to repel attackswhether physical or psychologicalhas led to the development of elaborate systems of justice and defense.

Withdrawal

Time-outs are essential and refreshing in any sport or group activity Just as a student seeks contact, at other times he needs to withdraw, regroup, center Also, withdrawing is a kind of counterbalancing act to the goal of contact

Positive and Negative Approaches to the Four Goals

Positive and Negative Approaches to the Four Goals

There are no good or bad students Instead, students choose to pursue the four basic goals in either positive or negative way

Students with high self-esteem and courage will generally choose the positive approaches Those with low self-esteem who are discouraged will more likely choose the negative approaches

Positive Approach

Student's Goal

Negative Approach

Contribution Independence

Contact
Power

Undue attentionseeking Rebellion

Assertiveness; Protection Forgiveness Centering

Revenge
Avoidance

How to Determine a Student's Goal

Because we do not usually know the goals behind a student's misbehavior, we often take an action that makes the problem worse.

Our discipline actually gives the student a payoff in terms of achieving her basic goal.

And if negative behavior works, why not continue to use it?

It's usually the easier approach.

How to Determine a Student's Goal

The first step, then, is to determine what the student really wants.

Once we know the goal, we can help the student choose the positive approach to getting it

Because much of the student's misbehavior is aimed at us, becoming aware of our own feelings during a conflict can be a powerful clue to the student's goals

How to Determine a Student's Goal

Second, the student's response to our attempts at correcting the misbehavior

How does a student behave after we have made an effort to correct the misbehavior?

If We Feel ...

And the Student's Response to Correction Is ...

Then the Negative Approach Is ...

To the Student Goal of ...

annoyed

stop, but start again very soon

undue attentionseeking

contact

angry

increase the misbehavior or give in, only to fight again another day

rebellion

power

hurt

continue to hurt us or increase the misbehavior

revenge

protection

helpless

become passive; refuse to try

avoidance

withdrawal

Four Negative Approaches

Undue Attention-Seeking

The student who seeks contact through undue attention-seeking probably has the mistaken belief that they must be the center of attention in order to belong

Older students prefer the attention of peers They may become class clowns or the ones who are constantly in troubleanything to stay in the limelight

Undue Attention-Seeking

So the student finds ways to keep people busy The student may act forgetful, helpless or lazy, putting the teacher in his service with reminders and coaxing Or the student may get attention by clowning, asking constant questions, pestering or making a nuisance Teachers typically feel annoyed or irritated with such behavior When we correct the student, they will usually stop the misbehavior Our correction has given the contact the student seeks However, the student will usually want more contact soon and resume the misbehavior.

Undue Attention-Seeking

How teachers pay off the negative approach of undue attention seeking:

We tend to remind, nag, coax, complain, give mini-lectures, scold and otherwise stay in contact with the student. This attention tends to reinforce the student's mistaken approach to achieving contact.

Undue Attention-Seeking: What can teachers do differently?

Do the unexpected

We want to act more and talk less Either a brief confrontation through an I message or a logical consequence We also want to actively encourage the student toward the positive approach We want to help the student achieve the recognition and contact they want by finding meaningful ways for the student to contribute to the group While ignoring some of the unproductive attention-getting behaviors

Rebellion

Rebellion is the most common and creates the most distress in schools.

The student's mistaken belief with this approach is that the only way to achieve power is to control others, or at least show others she can't be controlled by them This behavior can be very frustrating, and what clues us into the fact that we are engaged in a power struggle is our own anger If we express this anger to the student and join the power struggle, the student's usual response is to intensify the struggle, an increase the misbehavior. If the student does back down during such a confrontation, it is only to fight again another day

Rebellion: How Teachers Pay Off The Negative Approach

There are two ways to lose a power struggle:

Fighting and giving in

When we get angry and engage in a verbal fight, we are in effect saying to the student, "Look how powerful you are; you have made me angry and pulled me down to your level." When we give in to a rebelling student's unreasonable demands, we give the message, "Look how powerful your rebellion is; it has gotten you your way."

In either case, the student's rebellious approach to power has been paid off and will likely continue.

What Can Teachers Do Differently?

We can give a choice We can let the student make some mistakes and then experience the consequences . . . without our lecturing or humiliating We can use communication skills and methods of encouragement to begin winning a more cooperative relationship And, most important, we can show the student we are not interested in fighting Instead, we will work together to find solutions, and when discipline is necessary, we will use methods like logical consequences rather than anger and punishment.

What Can Teachers Do Differently?

We can refuse to give in to the student's unreasonable demands. We can set firm limits, negotiate within those limits We can refuse to be intimidated by the displays of anger and enforce the consequences of breaking the limits We can let our students know that while we believe they should be treated respectfully, we expect to be treated respectfully as well.

Revenge

An increase in the power struggle usually leads to the negative approach of revenge, especially if the student feels that the teacher has "won too many battles" or has hurt the student in the process.

The student decides that the best form of protection is to hurt back.

The teacher's typical feeling is hurt, and because we can feel when students hurt us we should punish them more, and escalating revenge cycle begins

Revenge: How Teachers Pay Off The Negative Approach

When students seek to protect themselves by getting revenge, they are usually feeling very discouraged When we retaliate with punishment we discourage them further and confirm their belief that they have a right to hurt us back. The more we hurt them, the more they want to hurt us back.

Revenge: How Teachers Pay Off The Negative Approach

It will help us to remember that no student is born "bad" or "mean." For students to act this way, they have to be hurting inside. The first step, then, is to do what we can to stop whatever is hurting the student

If it is our behavior, we can take a new approach. If someone else is hurting her, we can support the student in handling it herself or take more direct action when appropriate

Avoidance

Students who become extremely discouraged may give up trying. Their belief becomes "I can't succeed so I'll avoid trying; then I can't fail." They develop an apathy and lack of motivation that often leaves teachers feeling helpless. Such students may be absent from class, fail to do assignments and avoid peers.

For too many tobacco, alcohol and other drugs may become a way for them to avoid the challenges life poses and find temporary relief from their own discouragement.

Avoidance: How Teachers Pay Off The Negative Approach

Our perfectionism may assist the student's long, slow slide into avoidance.

When we focus excessively on mistakes, When nothing ever seems to be good enough for us, When all we talk about is their great "potential," the student may give up trying altogether

Avoidance: How Teachers Pay Off The Negative Approach

Once a student has chosen avoidance, we often make the mistake of giving up on them

We can write them off as losers and stop making an effort to help Or we raise our voice, humiliate and punish. Either way, we send the message "You're not good enough for us."

This confirms the student's own evaluation of himself and so justifies his avoidance.

Avoidance: What Can Teachers Do Differently?

Communicate to the student that whether she succeeds or fails, our caring for her is unconditional We will need to practice patience and give a lot of encouragement We can help the student find tasks they can perform successfully, so they can begin to break the misconception of themselves as a loser We can help them to see that mistakes are for learning, and failure is just a lesson on the road to success.

Negative Approaches: What Can We Do Differently?

With persistent problems related to any of the four goals, all are encouraged to consider the team approach

Involving not only the student, but possibly the Student Success Center, Tutors, and other resources.

The Teacher-Student Cycle

The Teacher-Student Cycle

Many people act as if other people control their feelings

You make me angry. You make me so happy.

The Teacher-Student Cycle

Although other people do influence or trigger our feelings, The cause of our feelings are our own beliefs, attitudes and values or what we think:
DO (What we do) EVENTS (What others do)

FEEL (How we feel)

THINK (What we think about it)

The Teacher-Student Cycle

We can influence others through our behavior and they can influence us through theirs The choice, however, is always with us Events that happen do not define us. How we decide to respond to these events do.

DO (What we do)

EVENTS (What others do)

FEEL (How we feel)

THINK (What we think about it)

The Teacher-Student Cycle

Example: "You're really making me angry" an instructor says to a student whose mistaken approach to power is rebellion

"Look how powerful your rebellion is; it has made me lose my temper."

This actually reinforces the student's mistaken belief, and he rebels even more.

Alternative Example: Accepting that "I have a choice: I can either get angry or I can take some other action" puts you in control of yourself When you "push your own buttons" instead of giving away that power, many alternatives become available.

The Teacher-Student Cycle

Teacher

We can see how what a student might "do" can influence what his teacher thinks. The teacher's thinking then influences his feeling, which influences what he chooses to do. What the teacher does then influences what the student thinks, feels and does

Do

Think

Feel

Feel

Think

Do

How to Approach Negative Behavior

Who Owns The Problem?

Provide support (and encourage).

Avoid paying off the student's negative approach to goals.

Polite reminders

Natural consequences
Non verbal cues eye contact physical proximity

"I" messages

Active communication
Natural consequences (when appropriate)

Logical consequences & logical incentives

Provide discipline (and encourage)

When the Teacher Owns the Problem

Polite reminders

Non verbal cues eye contact physical proximity

"I" messages

Natural consequences (when appropriate)

Logical consequences & logical incentives

When the Teacher Owns the Problem: Logical Consequences Guidelines

Give person a choice

Either/or choice When/then choice

Make sure the consequence is logical Ask person to help Give choices you can live with Keep your tone firm and friendly

When the Teacher Owns the Problem: Logical Consequences Guidelines

Give choice once, then act Expect testing Allow person to try again later

Provide support (and encourage)

Natural consequences

I Messages

Situations when not to use Natural Consequences

When the situation is too dangerous When the consequences are too distant When no natural consequences are likely to occur

I Messages

A term coined Thomas Gordon in his Parent Effectiveness Training (PE.T) program They are firm and calm communications that can produce surprisingly effective results. They are called "I" messages because they shift the emphasis from the student (a traditional "you" message) to how the teacher ("I") feels about the student's behavior.

I Message Advantages

They allow the teacher to say how she feels about the student's behavior without blaming or labeling the student. They create a situation in which the student is more likely to hear is was leading a what the teacher is saying because it is expressed in a non-threatening way They convey clearly to the student one consequence (the teacher feeling) of the student's behavior They put the emphasis on the student's behavior and not on the student's personality They give the student clear information about what change in behavior the teacher wants

How to Send an "I" Message

Name the behavior or situation you want changed.

"I have a problem with your Instant Messaging and surfing the Internet during class."

2.

Say how you feel about the situation

How to Send an "I" Message

State your reason.

. . because it distracts other students from my lecture and also shows my class is less of a priority.

Say what you want done.

"I would like you to stop Instant Messaging and surfing the Internet during class."

I Message

I have a problem with your Instant Messaging and surfing the Internet during class. I feel irritated and disrespected because it distracts other students from my lecture and also shows my class is less of a priority. I would like you to stop Instant Messaging and surfing the Internet during class.

Purpose of Teaching
Prepare students to survive and thrive in the kind of society in which they live.

Purpose of Teaching

Although the subject matter taught is certainly an important part of any purpose, teachers go beyond subject matter. We teach to the students attitude, as well as aptitude;

They listen to the student's heart, as well as her words. They help foster the qualities of character and self-worth that enable students to make real contributions to their communities and their world.

Active teachers go beyond subject matter

"Enhancing discipline, self-esteem and student performance" speaks to a larger purpose of teaching than simple classroom management.

The goal is not merely to manage students so that we can cover the material.

Instead our goal is to enhance students so that they develop the attitudes, skills and personal qualities that will enable them to survive and thrive in a democratic society. Then they will have something to contribute back to that society.

What Do We Want for Our Students?

What does it take for a student to thrive?

What qualities are important for surviving and thriving in a democratic society? Responsibility Cooperation Courage Self-Esteem

Four qualities are essential: