Findley

NARRATION — AND THEN...

Telling a story, or narrating, is one of the most appealing and natural ways to convey
information. Every time you tell a joke, trade gossip, invent a ghost story, or tell a
friend what you did on the weekend, you are narrating. In both speech and writing,
telling a story can be the most direct way to make a point. If your idea or opinion was
formed by your experience, a clear account of that experience will often help people
to understand and even to accept your point.

Choice of scope: Time stretches infinitely toward both the past and the future — but where
does your narrative most logically begin and end? Include only the part or parts that best
illustrate your point. If facts about the past or future are needed, sketch them in with a few
words of explanation.

Choice of details: Which details will contribute to the main point? Reject the trivial ones
and seek those that represent your dominant impression or idea. Which details are most
vivid? Reject the weak ones and select those that help the reader to see, hear, feel, smell, or
taste — in other words, those that most encourage the reader to experience the events.

Choice of connections: Readers like to be “swept along” by a narrative. How is this effect
achieved? Partly by an economical use of words, and partly by the use of time signals. Like
road signs for the motorist, the words, “at first,” “next,” “then,” “immediately,” “suddenly,”
“later,” “finally,” and “at last” show the way and encourage progress. Use these words, and
others like them, wherever they fit. Choose carefully, making the right signals to help build
your effect.

Wr it ing About Mysel f WRITING ABOUT OTHERS

My traffic accident A BRUSH WITH DEATH
The day I learned to be honest A RESCUE
My moment as a sports hero AN INCIDENT OF SEXISM
The day I learne d to recognize people A CATASTROP HE
of the opposite sex as equals AN EXAM P LE OF CHARITY IN ACTION
My visit to the dentist AN ASSAULT
My brush with the law AN HISTORICAL EVENT
An occasion when I surprised myself A MAJOR FAILURE OF COM M UNICATION
My first date AN IM P ORTANT EVENT IN THE LIFE OF A CHILD
The day I learned to like (or dislike) school AN IM P ORTANT EVENT IN THE LIFE
The day I was a victim of prejudice OF AN ELDERLY PERSON
The day I learned to tell the truth A VIOLENT INCIDENT AT A SP ORTING EVENT
The day I got lost A PRACTICAL JOKE THAT BACKfiRED
The day I realized what career I wanted AN ALARM ING MOB SCENE
My escape from another country A SUCCESS IN THE LIFE OF TEACHER
The day I realized I was an adult

Source: The Act of Writing by Ronald Conrad

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 Personal Narration Notes -- 075/110
A Personal Narration Paragraph/Essay
1) A personal narration is an account of some event that has occurred in your life, some
experience you have had -- for example, an embarrassing job interview; a proud moment as a
high school athlete; a frightening childhood encounter with a vicious dog.

2) Narrow down your topic for a paragraph or an essay:

Don't try, for example, to write about your entire vacation to Hawaii; instead write
about one incident during this vacation -- going to a luau, surfing for the first time,
or learning to hula.

Choose an event which spans a short period of time so you can cover it in depth in a
paragraph or a short essay.

3) Write in first person (I) -- the use of "I" makes your narration a "personal" one.
(Note: Your instructor may also allow third person point of view.)

4) Cover at least four elements in your paragraph/essay:

a) setting (place, surroundings)
b) characters (people involved)
c) plot (the action, the details of the event)
d) significance -- the main point or impression you want to convey.

5) Be certain that you have a strong topic sentence or thesis statement that expresses an opinion
or clear main idea (unless your instructor makes this optional).

To arrive at a topic sentence or thesis statement in a personal narrative, ask yourself: “What
did this experience mean to me?” Try using a fill-in-the-blank approach:

1) My first attempt at water skiing was very _____________________________.

(The word you use to fill in the blank is the opinion word in your topic sentence.
It could be “disastrous,” “gratifying,” etc.)

2) I really ___________________ the tour of Chinatown in Chicago last summer.

(Your opinion word could be “enjoyed,” “disliked,” etc.)

6) Observe clear chronological (time) order in your narration.

7) Sometimes a background sentence is necessary to “set-up” the narration, to take the reader
quickly to the “heart” of your story. Such a sentence usually appears first in the paragraph or
essay and indicates the “who, what, when, where, or why” of the narration.

EXAMPLE: Last winter my sister Joan and I spent two weeks in Florida.
While there...

NOTE: This is not a topic sentence or thesis, but rather a “lead-in” sentence. Your
topic sentence or thesis would follow this lead-in sentence. (In an essay,
other types of lead-in sentences may also be used.)
8) Don’t forget to include transitions wherever necessary in your narration. Since you’re using
chronological order, your transitions will often be time transitions:

after leaving the house

when we first arrived
in the morning
later that day
after an exciting afternoon
during the evening
that night
as soon as we got home, etc.

9) If the actual words of a person in your paragraph are important, use dialogue (direct
conversation) with quotation marks.

10) Write as concretely as possible -- use names, specific details, pictorial description, etc.

11) Sample OUTLINE of a personal narration essay (outlining can also be used with a
paragraph assignment):

I. Introduction: When I was in the second grade, I allowed my friends to persuade me

to play a prank on my teacher. This early traumatic experience taught
me that there are right and wrong times for humor. (OR: This
experience proved to be one of the worst of my childhood.)

II. Body: Setting up the prank was very exciting. I spent hours collecting roaches
and spiders.

III. Body: I arrived at school an hour early with a jar filled with dozens of hideous,
crawling insects. I put them in place.

IV. Body: The reaction of Mrs. Jackson and the class. My getting caught! I never
knew exactly how Mrs. Jackson figured out who was responsible for
the “bugging,” but somehow she did.

V. Conclusion: After this escapade, I reserved my sense of humor for my friends only
and vowed that I would analyze a situation carefully before jumping
into it.

M:\9-TLC\TLC Web Design\Handouts Worksheets\Reading\Personal Narration Notes.doc

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 NARRATIVE ESSAY
A narrative essay is an essay that tells a story about a specific event or experience. Narratives have a point,
and the narrative (story) is used to convey the point. A narrative includes all the key events of the story,
presented in time order. The narrative essay is more than just a listing of events; it often uses descriptive and
sensory information to make the narrator’s point and to make the story real for the reader. Consequently,
narratives are often subjective rather than objective.

NARRATIVE ESSAYS ARE USUALLY WRITTEN FROM ONE OF TWO POINTS OF VIEW:
– First Person (speaker): Uses personal pronouns such as I, we, me, my, mine
– Third Person (person spoken about): Uses personal pronouns such as she, he, it, they

KEY COMPONENTS OF A NARRATIVE ESSAY

1. Some significant event, experience or relationship provides the organizing focus/idea
2. Sensory and specific supporting details that give the reader a close-up of the events, experience or
relationship (e.g. scenery, season, scents, sounds, dialogue, etc.)
3. Events or activities in time sequence (i.e. Beginning, Middle, End or Aftermath).
4. Unified: everything in the essay refers to the central idea or focus
5. Written in one tense (usually past tense) and from one point of view (first or third person)
6. Transitional phrases that help the reader follow the sequence of actions

EXAMPLES OF TRANSITIONAL PHRASES

After a short time Afterwards As long as As soon as
At last At length At that time At the same time
Before Earlier Of late Immediately
In the meantime In the past Lately Later
Meanwhile Now Presently Shortly
Since Soon Temporarily Then
Thereupon Until When While

One
Tense
Sensory and
Transitional Specific Details
Phrases

Event or
Experience

Learning and Tutoring Center, Fall 2011 Page 1 of 2

 A FEW QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER WHEN WRITING A NARRATIVE ESSAY
Beginning (establishes the point and the tone)
1. Why was this event or experience so important or memorable?
2. Why were you involved?
3. How did you feel at the beginning of the event or experience?

Middle (focuses on the events in time sequence)

1. What happened during the event or experience?
2. Was there a climax or very dramatic moment?
3. How did you feel during the event or experience?

End/Aftermath (reiterates/confirms the significance of the point)

1. What was the result or conclusion?
2. What did you like or dislike about this event or experience?
3. How did you feel after the event or experience?
4. What did you learn from this event or experience?

NARRATIVE OUTLINE
I. Introduction
A. Lead-in: Background information that sets the tone and draws the reader in
B. Tie-in: A sentence that connects the lead-in with the thesis statement
C. Thesis: Sentence which states why this experience was so important or memorable
II. Body
A. Details about the beginning of the event or experience
1. Specific supporting ideas, details and examples
2. Sensory and descriptive details
B. Details about what occurred during the event or experience
1. Specific supporting ideas, details and examples
2. Sensory and descriptive details
C. Details about what happened in the final stage of the event or personal experience
1. Specific supporting ideas, details and examples
2. Sensory and descriptive details
III. Conclusion
A. Reiterate: Rephrases the thesis
B. Review: Summarizes your main supporting ideas
C. Reflect: Indicates the significance of the experience
D. Wrap-up: Leaves the reader with a deep and powerful last thought

NOTE: Each paragraph should focus on one specific aspect of the event or personal experience instead of
skimming over a series of events.

Portions of this handout were taken from Philip Egger’s Process and Practice: A Guide for Developing Writers and the
“Study Guides and Strategies” website (http://www.studygs.net/fiveparag.htm).

Learning and Tutoring Center, Fall 2011 Page 2 of 2

 CLRC Writing Center
Structure of a Personal Narrative Essay

“Narrative” is a term more commonly known as “story.” Narratives written for college or personal
narratives, tell a story, usually to some point, to illustrate some truth or insight. Following are some
tools to help you structure your personal narrative, breaking it down into parts.
The “Hook” Start your paper with a statement about your story that catches
the reader’s attention, for example: a relevant quotation, question, fact, or
definition.
Set the Scene Provide the information the reader will need to understand the
story: Who are the major characters? When and where is it taking place? Is it a
Introduction story about something that happened to you, the writer, or is it fiction?

Thesis Statement The thesis of a narrative essay plays a slightly different

role than that of an argument or expository essay. A narrative thesis can begin
the events of the story: “It was sunny and warm out when I started down the
path”; offer a moral or lesson learned: “I’ll never hike alone again”; or
identify a theme that connects the story to a universal experience: “Journeys
bring both joy and hardship.”

“Show, Don’t Tell” Good story telling includes details and descriptions that
help the reader understand what the writer experienced. Think about using all
five senses—not just the sense of sight—to add details about what you heard,
saw, and felt during the event. For example, “My heart jumped as the dark
shape of the brown grizzly lurched toward me out of the woods” provides
more information about what the writer saw and felt than, “I saw a bear when
I was hiking”.

Supporting Evidence In a personal narrative, your experience acts as the

evidence that proves your thesis. The events of the story should demonstrate
Body the lesson learned, or the significance of the event to you.
Paragraph
Passage of Time Writing about the events of your experience using time
chronologically, from beginning to end, is the most common and clear way to
tell a story. Whether you choose to write chronologically or not, use transition
words to clearly indicate to the reader what happened first, next, and last.
Some time transition words are next, finally, during, after, when, and later.

Transitions In a narrative essay, a new paragraph marks a change in the

action of a story, or a move from action to reflection. Paragraphs should
connect to one another. For example, the end of one paragraph might be: “I
turned and ran, hoping the bear hadn’t noticed me”, and the start of the next
might be: “There are many strategies for surviving an encounter with a bear;
‘turn and run’ is not one of them.” The repetition of words connects the
paragraphs. (What does the change in verb tense indicate?)*

The Moral of the Story The conclusion of a narrative include the closing
Conclusion action of the event, but also should include some reflection or analysis of the
significance of the event to the writer. What lesson did you learn? How has
what happened to you affected your life now?

1/09
 Homework Helper

Personal Narrative Sample Paper

Name_ ___________________________ Date _______________

The title lets the My First Talent Show

reader know what
the story is about. Standing backstage, I could feel my heart thumping in my In the introduction,
chest. “Just relax,” my friend Jenny whispered. “You’re ready for the writer
To set the scene, this.” I nodded. Jenny was right. I’d been practicing my song for describes what
the writer includes the school talent show for six weeks. Still, picturing an audience happened first.
details about packed with kids, parents and teachers made me want to run out
where the story the door.
took place.
“Too late for that,” I thought, as Mr. Peterson announced my The writer includes
song. Jenny gave me a nudge, and suddenly I was on the stage. details about what
Standing in the spotlight, I grasped the microphone and belted out he or she was
the lyrics. I heard my voice pour through the speakers and fill the thinking.
room. “It’s going well,” I thought to myself. “Don’t mess up.”

The writer includes I looked out at the sea of faces. The auditorium was dark, but I The writer
details about what could see hundreds of eyes staring back at me. The smell of candy describes what
he or she saw, bars and popcorn filled the room. “I hope Jenny is saving some for happened next.
heard, smelled me,” I thought, as I started the chorus one last time.
or felt.
As I finished the song, the audience began to clap. “Yeah, _ In the conclusion,
Katie!” one kid yelled. “You rock!” screeched another. I took a the writer describes
bow and walked offstage with a smile plastered across my face. what happened last.
The writer includes “How many days until next year’s talent show?” I asked Jenny.
a detail that shows
how he or she
felt about this
experience in
the end.

© TIME For Kids. This page may be photocopied for use with students.
 CHAPTER 3—REPRODUCIBLE 2A

Personal Narrative Essay Model

Promises Are Not Meant

to Be Broken
My heart leaped with excitement! My hero (a.k.a.
my dad) was taking care of my older brothers and me.
At the very least, this meant chocolate marshmallow
The anecdote, or
“little story,” in the ice-cream cones and maybe even the privilege of staying
introduction pro-
vides background
up past 8:00 P.M. Clean, polished, and properly p.j.’d,
information for I plastered my charming five-year-old smile on my face
the narrative
essay. The last and politely begged to watch Wagon Train, a show that
sentence is a
modified thesis
ended at 9:00, with my brothers. To my great delight
statement that Dad caved in but made me promise to go to bed at 8:30.
outlines the three
consequences of Happily I crossed my heart and pledged to do as I was
the decision.
told. Little did I know that later I would face a decision
that would fill me with doubt, cause me to disobey my
dad, and lead me to suffer the unhappy consequences.
Along with The Lone Ranger, Wagon Train promised
to become one of my favorite television shows. Filled
with western frontier action, the trials and tribulations
of America’s early pioneers kept me and my siblings on The first body
paragraph relates
the edge of our seats. Right in the middle of a dramatic to the first point
of the modified
showdown, my oldest brother told me it was 8:30, time thesis statement.
for me to go to bed. Although a small voice whispered, It uses some
dialogue, vivid
“Remember what you promised Dad,” a louder voice verbs, and
figurative language.
shouted, “Hide somewhere so you can see whether

A clincher
Cookie gets scalped!” Back and forth, up and down my
sentence conscience seesawed. Doubt clung to me like a wide
summarizes
the information. strip of Velcro.

50 Mastering the Five-Paragraph Essay Scholastic Teaching Resources

CHAPTER 3—REPRODUCIBLE 2B

“Bang!” The battle against the Indians began, and I

The second body was hooked. Pretending to head toward bed, I stealthily
paragraph shows
the narrator crept behind the stairwell wall. From there I had a clear
chooses the
wrong path, the
view of the television, yet no one in the living room could
second point in see me. Propped up against the wall with my teddy bear
the modified
thesis statement. in hand, I made my fateful decision: I would watch the
rest of the show.
Totally enthralled by the action, I failed to see my
dad enter the living room and head toward the stairs.
Before I could zip into my room, Dad, red-faced and
angry, appeared at the bottom of the steps. With a
quivering voice he declared, “Sue, you must never, ever
The third body
break a promise. I counted on you to keep your word.” paragraph
Immediately the tears welled up and trickled down my illustrates the
consequences of
cheeks. I had disappointed my hero, and, even worse, I the narrator’s
decision, the third
had disappointed my best moral self. Slowly my father point in the
continued, “I think an appropriate punishment would be modified thesis.

to go without watching TV for an entire week. And that

means no Wagon Train!” In the end, the prospect of not
seeing any of my favorite shows did not bother me nearly
as much as the thought of letting down my dear old dad.
When I was just five I learned a valuable lesson
The conclusion from an extraordinary teacher: my dad. After disobeying
shows what the
him one night and suffering the natural consequences
narrator learns
from making her of my actions, I realized how important it is to keep a
decision.
promise. To this day if I promise to do something, you
can bet your bottom dollar that I will do it.

Mastering the Five-Paragraph Essay Scholastic Teaching Resources

51
 Outlining Your Narrative
Try applying this structure to your own writing: write sentences for the corresponding
elements of your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion in the space provided below.
Introduction:
Begin your paper with a
“hook” that catches the
reader’s attention and set the
scene. Where is the event set?
What time of year? How old
were you when this happened?
State your thesis: what you
learned, or how the event is
significant to you.

Body paragraphs: write three significant moments from the beginning, middle, and end of the event.
Para. 1: Topic sentence: Note:
Beginning Detail 1. Don’t forget
Action
to “Show,
Detail 2. Don’t Tell”:
List sounds,
Detail 3. smells,
sights, tastes,
Para. 2: Topic sentence: and textures
Middle Detail 1. that you
Action remember.
Detail 2. Your
experience is
Detail 3. your
“evidence”.
Use
Para 3: Topic sentence:
End transition
Detail 1.
Action words to
mark the
Detail 2.
passage of
time.
Detail 3.

Conclusion:
Analyze and reflect on the
action of the story, including
how the events are significant
to you.

 Writing Strategies to Consider *Verb Tense: Reporting vs. Reflecting The events of
most narratives are told in past tense: “As I hiked, I felt
First Person vs. Third Person Narratives are a mode of the warm sun on my back.” Use present tense when
writing in which writers often use first person perspective reflecting on the events: “Now I know how unprepared I
(“I saw”, “I did”). Check with your instructor to determine was”. Notice the change in tense in this sentence as the
whether you can use “I” when telling your story. writer reflects on the past event, from the present.
 CHAPTER 3—REPRODUCIBLE 3A

Name ____________________________________ Date ___________ Section __________

Personal Narrative Essay Editing Sheet

Yes No Focus
___ ___ Does the story clearly relate to the essay topic?
___ ___ Does each detail and paragraph relate to the topic?
___ ___ Are there any sections, parts, or sentences that need to be removed
because they do not relate to the topic?

ORGANIZATION
Introduction
___ ___ Is there an attention-getting opening?
___ ___ Does the introduction include background information about the topic?
___ ___ Is there an identifiable main idea or modified thesis statement in the
last sentence of the introduction? Remember, in a narrative essay the
writer may not be able to outline the three points.
___ ___ Does the introduction work? Does it relate to the body of the essay?

Body
___ ___ Are there at least three paragraphs?
___ ___ Does each body paragraph develop one main idea presented in
the introduction?
___ ___ Are the paragraphs arranged in a logical order?
___ ___ Does one sentence relate to another?
___ ___ Are there smooth transitions between paragraphs? Does one paragraph
flow into another?
___ ___ Are there transition words? (Circle these.)

Conclusion
___ ___ Does the conclusion/ending effectively and naturally end the narrative essay?
___ ___ Does the conclusion show what was learned, stimulate additional thought,
or pack a powerful punch?
52 Mastering the Five-Paragraph Essay Scholastic Teaching Resources
CHAPTER 3—REPRODUCIBLE 3B

Name ____________________________________ Date ___________ Section __________

Yes No Content
___ ___ Are there lots of specific details related to making the decision or choice?

___ ___ Does the reader learn who, what, where, when, why, and how from
the content?

___ ___ Do the details paint a vivid, clear picture of what happened?
___ ___ Is any dialogue or conversation used?

Usage (Conventions)
___ ___ Are all sentences complete?

___ ___ Is every paragraph indented?

___ ___ Are all words spelled correctly?

___ ___ Is proper capitalization used?

___ ___ Is punctuation correct?

___ ___ Is the grammar correct?

Style
___ ___ Does the story sound serious, amusing, or frightening? In other words,
can you identify a tone or mood?

___ ___ Are the sentence beginnings varied? (Highlight the first four words of ten
sentences to check this.)

___ ___ Do you know how things look, feel, and sound? Are your five senses
involved in the story?

___ ___ Are the sentence lengths varied (short, medium, and long)?

___ ___ Are there powerful adjectives? (Highlight at least four.)

Mastering the Five-Paragraph Essay Scholastic Teaching Resources

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