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4 yr. ago

MemeLord5743

longest text ever (most deleted bc max 40000 letters) :(

Hello, everyone! This is the LONGEST TEXT EVER! I was inspired by the various other "longest texts ever"
on the internet, and I wanted to make my own. So here it is! This is going to be a WORLD RECORD! This is
actually my third attempt at doing this. The first time, I didn't save it. The second time, the Neocities
editor crashed. Now I'm writing this in Notepad, then copying it into the Neocities editor instead of
typing it directly in the Neocities editor to avoid crashing. It sucks that my past two attempts are gone
now. Those actually got pretty long. Not the longest, but still pretty long. I hope this one won't get lost
somehow. Anyways, let's talk about WAFFLES! I like waffles. Waffles are cool. Waffles is a funny word.
There's a Teen Titans Go episode called "Waffles" where the word "Waffles" is said a hundred-something
times. It's pretty annoying. There's also a Teen Titans Go episode about Pig Latin. Don't know what Pig
Latin is? It's a language where you take all the consonants before the first vowel, move them to the end,
and add '-ay' to the end. If the word begins with a vowel, you just add '-way' to the end. For example,
"Waffles" becomes "Afflesway". I've been speaking Pig Latin fluently since the fourth grade, so it
surprised me when I saw the episode for the first time. I speak Pig Latin with my sister sometimes. It's
pretty fun. I like speaking it in public so that everyone around us gets confused. That's never actually
happened before, but if it ever does, 'twill be pretty funny. By the way, "'twill" is a word I invented
recently, and it's a contraction of "it will". I really hope it gains popularity in the near future, because
"'twill" is WAY more fun than saying "it'll". "It'll" is too boring. Nobody likes boring. This is nowhere near
being the longest text ever, but eventually it will be! I might still be writing this a decade later, who
knows? But right now, it's not very long. But I'll just keep writing until it is the longest! Have you ever
heard the song "Dau Dau" by Awesome Scampis? It's an amazing song. Look it up on YouTube! I play that
song all the time around my sister! It drives her crazy, and I love it. Another way I like driving my sister
crazy is by speaking my own made up language to her. She hates the languages I make! The only
language that we both speak besides English is Pig Latin. I think you already knew that. Whatever. I think
I'm gonna go for now. Bye! Hi, I'm back now. I'm gonna contribute more to this soon-to-be giant wall of
text. I just realised I have a giant stuffed frog on my bed. I forgot his name. I'm pretty sure it was
something stupid though. I think it was "FROG" in Morse Code or something. Morse Code is cool. I know
a bit of it, but I'm not very good at it. I'm also not very good at French. I barely know anything in French,
and my pronunciation probably sucks. But I'm learning it, at least. I'm also learning Esperanto. It's this
language that was made up by some guy a long time ago to be the "universal language". A lot of people
speak it. I am such a language nerd. Half of this text is probably gonna be about languages. But hey, as
long as it's long! Ha, get it? As LONG as it's LONG? I'm so funny, right? No, I'm not. I should probably get
some sleep. Goodnight! Hello, I'm back again. I basically have only two interests nowadays: languages
and furries. What? Oh, sorry, I thought you knew I was a furry. Haha, oops. Anyway, yeah, I'm a furry, but
since I'm a young furry, I can't really do as much as I would like to do in the fandom. When I'm older, I
would like to have a fursuit, go to furry conventions, all that stuff. But for now I can only dream of that.
Sorry you had to deal with me talking about furries, but I'm honestly very desperate for this to be the
longest text ever. Last night I was watching nothing but fursuit unboxings. I think I need help. This one
time, me and my mom were going to go to a furry Christmas party, but we didn't end up going because
of the fact that there was alcohol on the premises, and that she didn't wanna have to be a mom dragging
her son through a crowd of furries. Both of those reasons were understandable. Okay, hopefully I won't
have to talk about furries anymore. I don't care if you're a furry reading this right now, I just don't wanna
have to torture everyone else. I will no longer say the F word throughout the rest of this entire text. Of
course, by the F word, I mean the one that I just used six times, not the one that you're probably
thinking of which I have not used throughout this entire text. I just realised that next year will be 2020.
That's crazy! It just feels so futuristic! It's also crazy that the 2010s decade is almost over. That decade
brought be a lot of memories. In fact, it brought be almost all of my memories. It'll be sad to see it go.
I'm gonna work on a series of video lessons for Toki Pona. I'll expain what Toki Pona is after I come back.
Bye! I'm back now, and I decided not to do it on Toki Pona, since many other people have done Toki Pona
video lessons already. I decided to do it on Viesa, my English code. Now, I shall explain what Toki Pona is.
Toki Pona is a minimalist constructed language that has only ~120 words! That means you can learn it
very quickly. I reccomend you learn it! It's pretty fun and easy! Anyway, yeah, I might finish my video
about Viesa later. But for now, I'm gonna add more to this giant wall of text, because I want it to be the
longest! It would be pretty cool to have a world record for the longest text ever. Not sure how famous I'll
get from it, but it'll be cool nonetheless. Nonetheless. That's an interesting word. It's a combination of
three entire words. That's pretty neat. Also, remember when I said that I said the F word six times
throughout this text? I actually messed up there. I actually said it ten times (including the plural form).
I'm such a liar! I struggled to spell the word "liar" there. I tried spelling it "lyer", then "lier". Then I
remembered that it's "liar". At least I'm better at spelling than my sister. She's younger than me, so I
guess it's understandable. "Understandable" is a pretty long word. Hey, I wonder what the most
common word I've used so far in this text is. I checked, and appearantly it's "I", with 59 uses! The word
"I" makes up 5% of the words this text! I would've thought "the" would be the most common, but "the"
is only the second most used word, with 43 uses. "It" is the third most common, followed by "a" and
"to". Congrats to those five words! If you're wondering what the least common word is, well, it's actually
a tie between a bunch of words that are only used once, and I don't wanna have to list them all here.
Remember when I talked about waffles near the beginning of this text? Well, I just put some waffles in
the toaster, and I got reminded of the very beginnings of this longest text ever. Okay, that was literally
yesterday, but I don't care. You can't see me right now, but I'm typing with my nose! Okay, I was not able
to type the exclamation point with just my nose. I had to use my finger. But still, I typed all of that
sentence with my nose! I'm not typing with my nose right now, because it takes too long, and I wanna
get this text as long as possible quickly. I'm gonna take a break for now! Bye! Hi, I'm back again. My sister
is beside me, watching me write in this endless wall of text. My sister has a new thing where she just
says the word "poop" nonstop. I don't really like it. She also eats her own boogers. I'm not joking. She's
gross like that. Also, remember when I said I put waffles in the toaster? Well, I forgot about those and I
only ate them just now. Now my sister is just saying random numbers. Now she's saying that they're not
random, they're the numbers being displayed on the microwave. Still, I don't know why she's doing that.
Now she's making annoying clicking noises. Now she's saying that she's gonna watch Friends on three
different devices. Why!?!?! Hi its me his sister. I'd like to say that all of that is not true. Max wants to
make his own video but i wont let him because i need my phone for my alarm.POOP POOP POOP POOP
LOL IM FUNNY.
kjnbhhisdnhidfhdfhjsdjksdnjhdfhdfghdfghdfbhdfbcbhnidjsduhchyduhyduhdhcduhduhdcdhcdhjdnjdnhjsd
jxnj Hey, I'm back. Sorry about my sister. I had to seize control of the LTE from her because she was doing
keymash. Keymash is just effortless. She just went back to school. She comes home from school for her
lunch break. I think I'm gonna go again. Bye! Hello, I'm back. Let's compare LTE's. This one is only 8593
characters long so far. Kenneth Iman's LTE is 21425 characters long. The Flaming-Chicken LTE (the
original) is a whopping 203941 characters long! I think I'll be able to surpass Kenneth Iman's not long
from now. But my goal is to surpass the Flaming-Chicken LTE. Actually, I just figured out that there's an
LTE longer than the Flaming-Chicken LTE. It's Hermnerps LTE, which is only slightly longer than the
Flaming-Chicken LTE, at 230634 characters. My goal is to surpass THAT. Then I'll be the world record
holder, I think. But I'll still be writing this even after I achieve the world record, of course. One time, I
printed an entire copy of the Bee Movie script for no reason.It'll feel nice to be way ahead the record.
My sister's alarm clock has been going off for half an hour and I haven't turned it off. Why? Because
LAZYNESS! Actually, I really should turn it off now. There, I turned it off. First when I tried to turn it off, it
started playing the radio. Then I tried again, and it turned off completely. Then I hurt myself on the door
while walking out. So that was quite the adventure. I'm gonna go sleep now. Goodnight! Hey, I'm back
again. My computer BSOD'd while writing this, so I have to start this section over again. That's why you
save your work, kids! Before I had to start over again, I was talking about languages. Yes, I decided to
bring that topic back after a while. But I no longer want to talk about it. Why? Because it'll probably bore
you to death. That is assuming you're reading this at all. Who knows, maybe absolutely zero people will
read this within the span of the universe's existence. But I doubt that. There's gotta be someone who'll
find this text and dedicate their time to reading it, even if it takes thousands of years for that to happen.
What will happen to this LTE in a thousand years? Will the entire internet dissapear within that time? In
that case, will this text dissapear with it? Or will it, along with the rest of what used to be the internet,
be preserved somewhere? I'm thinking out loud right now. Well, not really "out loud" because I'm typing
this, and you can't technically be loud through text. THE CLOSEST THING IS TYPING IN ALL CAPS. Imagine
if I typed this entire text like that. That would be painful. I decided to actually save my work this time, in
case of another crash. I already had my two past attempts at an LTE vanish from existance. I mean, most
of this LTE is already stored on Neocities, so I probably won't need to worry about anything. I think I
might change the LTE page a little. I want the actual text area to be larger. I'm gonna make it a very basic
HTML page with just a header and text. Maybe with some CSS coloring. I don't know. Screw it, I'm gonna
do it. There, now the text area is larger. It really does show how small this LTE is so far compared to
FlamingChicken or Hermnerps. But at least I made the background a nice Alice Blue. That's the name of
the CSS color I used. It's pretty light. We're getting pretty close to the 1/10 mark! That's the point where
we're one tenth of the way to making this the longest text ever, meaning all I have to do is write the
equivalent of everything I've already written so far nine more times! Not gonna make any promises,
though. How come every time I try to type "though", it comes out as "thought"? Why do I always type
the extra T? It's so annoying that I have to delete the T every time. Okay, only mildly annoying. Not as
annoying as I previously described. I apologize for my exaggeration of the annoyance level of me typing
"thought" instead of "though". I just realized that most of the games I play are games that I've been
playing for at least six years. I started playing Garry's Mod in 2013, Minecraft in whatever year version
1.2.3 came out. Now I have to look that up. March 2, 2012. So I started playing Minecraft approximately
during that time. Wow, seven years ago! Coincidentally, I was also seven years old then. I remember the
days of 2012-13. That was when I still played Roblox and made terrible YouTube videos. I was called
"Infinite Budgets" back then. I also remember the days of 2016. A lot of people thought that was a
terrible year, but for me personally, it brings me a lot of nostalgia because I talked a lot with my online
friend at the time, and I did livestreams on YouTube and stuff. It was fun. 2016 was also when I got the
phone that I still have to this day. Yup, my phone is three years old. My life was completely different
when I got this phone: I was 11 years old, my YouTube channel actually had activity, and I wasn’t writing
this text. I’m currently writing this in the car. We are on out way to the dollar store. And since I’m writing
this on my phone, I’m making a lot more typos than usual. Some of them might make it through, so be
prepared for that. Anyways, we appear to be getting close to the dollar store. I have a gift card for that
place. I think so anyways, it might be for a different store... Yup, this dollar store is different. Oh well. My
sister has an obsession with sponges. I’m sure she’s gonna find the sponges and go crazy over them. Why
does she like sponges so much? No idea. She just found a bag of tiny baby dolls, and she wants to put
them in ice cubes and call it “Ice Ice Baby”. She is truly a strange human being. My sister also has an
obsession with stuffies. She has such an addiction, that she’s banned from them. Now she found the
wigs and she’s considering buying one. She’s been looking at them for quite a while now. We’re out of
the dollar store, and now we’re going to the computer store. I have no idea why we’re here. I guess we
just are. Now we’re going home. Welp, that was a fun adventure. Stay tuned for more fun adventures as
you read through this LTE. I should go now. Bye! Hello again. I made a private world on OurWorldOfText
for my sister and I, but she doesn't want to join it. She doesn't think it'll be fun. Now I'm just editing it
alone. How sad. But oh well. Now I’m here adding more to this text. I once made a Discord server
specifically for a language called “Bo”, where the only word is “bo”. I made it almost four months ago,
and somehow, it’s still going. People are still spamming nothing but “bo” there. It’s great. I also once
made a server where you’re not allowed to use any vowels. It was a very strange server. I deleted it after
some time though, so all that insanity is no more. I also used to own a Pig Latin server, but it got inactive
so I deleted that too. We had some good memories in that server though. Now there’s a new Pig Latin
server, but it’s not owned by me. Dang, my YouTube channel has been dead for so long. I haven’t posted
a video in a year. I want to revive it, but I don’t know what to post there. I’ll figure it out. I doubt my
channel will ever go back to it’s 2016 legacy, but I’m sure I’ll post something eventually. Random fact of
the day: there are thirty-nine question marks so far in this text. Am I about to make it forty? Yes, I just
did. Now the fact I initially stated is no longer true. Or is it? Because I said “so far” in the fact, that
implies that we’re talking about the moment that fact was said, disregarding any future events. Now I’m
pretty sure that fact is still technically true. Welp, I guess I should just accept that I’m editing that world
of text alone for the rest of my life. I originally put a bunch of complaining in there, but I deleted it all.
The thing is, now that world will never be same without all of that complaining about my sister not being
here. But that’s fine. Hey, I just had a cool realization. Basically, there’s this conlang (constructed
language, for those not in the know) server where we have a Sentence of the Week activity. In this
activity, someone posts a text with a maximum of nine sentences, then people translate it into their own
conlangs. My realization is this: if we take nine sentences from this LTE every week, there would be a
whole year of sentences for people to translate. There are approximantly 523 sentences in this LTE.
Divide that by 9 sentences each week, and you get 58 weeks worth of sentences, which is approximantly
the number of weeks in a year. Quick maths. I actually suck at math, but that’s besides the point. I should
go now. Goodbye! Hello, I’m back again. I really need to come up with different hello and goodbye
messages, because I’ve already said “Hello, I’m back again” once before. Same with the “I should go now.
Goodbye!” I said at the end of the previous section. I was going to explain what a “section” is, but I’m
terrible at explaining things, so I’m not going to anymore. I guess you’ll just have to figure it out yourself.
It’s probably not very hard to figure out, anyways. I guess I can just say that a section starts with me
saying hello, and ends with me saying goodbye. That should be enough explaination, now that I think
about it. Hey, do you ever feel like you never have any idea what you’re talking about? That’s my entire
life. I just summarized it all in one sentence. On an unrelated note, I feel like half this LTE is just me
talking about the LTE itself. I mean, press CTRL+F on this webpage, then type “LTE”. Look at all the times I
use it in this text! Not counting the ‘lte’ in the word ‘multe’, of course. Dang, now the search results will
include that, too. Anyways, half of this text is just me talking about how I’m trying to get this text to be
the longest. Well, the longest LTE, anyways. I still have a long way to go. I’m only 12.7% of the way there.
I mean, minus the four month gap, my estimation is that I’ve only been writing this for not even two
weeks. So it makes sense that this LTE isn’t very long yet. Whenever I look at this webpage, it looks long
at first glance, but the longer I look at it, the more I realize how short it actually is. It’s something that I
can’t explain. For real this time. I just realized that none of this is helping the fact that half this LTE is
about the LTE itself. I should bring up a new topic, but I don’t feel comfortable talking about much else.
Why? Because, like I said, I never have any idea what I’m talking about. Most of this LTE is just me talking
about LTEs or languages. Sometimes furries, but I don’t wanna go back into that territory at this point.
But it doesn’t matter, because I’m still gonna write this LTE for as long as possible, even if it means
talking about the same things half the time. Also, LEARN VIESA! Haven’t said that in a while, so I might as
well bring it back. The documentation for Viesa is on this very website, so go ahead and read it! You
might need to know some linguistic knowledge to understand it, though. In fact, you probably won’t
understand most of it unless you know some amount about lingusitics, so you have been warned. If
Viesa is too much for you, Pig Latin will probably be better for you. If it's so easy that kids can learn it,
you can too! It's a language you can learn in probably five minutes, so why not give it a try? You may also
enjoy Ubbi Dubbi, where you place 'ub' before every vowel sound. It's also a very easy language to learn,
although not quite as popular. The thing is, none of these are even real languages. They're just codes,
and very simple codes at that. You could probably crask Pig Latin or Ubbi Dubbi rather easily. Viesa too,
actually. But I still enjoy them occasionally, even if Pig Latin and Ubbi Dubbi are inefficient and easy to
crack, and Viesa is easy to crack yet unneccesarily difficult. I do make real languages, but I never put in
the effort to learn them to fluency. At least I make them at all. Here’s a fun game: I will open up a
random page from a book, and tell you the first word I see. English. That’s the word. Stay tuned for more
fun games as you read through this LTE. We’re back, and we’re gonna play the same game as before.
Ready? Subject. Now we’re gonna do it again. Reading. And again. Itself. Constituent. Grammar.
Colloquial. Black. Outline. Add. About four of those words were language related. You’ll never guess
why! (Spoiler alert: it’s a conlanging book). I’m running out of ideas now. I’m just gonna generate a
random word and try to talk about it. Forbid. That’s the opposite of “allow”, I’m pretty sure. I don’t really
know what else to say. Well, I guess I failed at generating a topic I could talk about. You know what's
weird? My favorite word hasn't been used once in this entire text. I'm about to change that forever. Epic.
Yup, my favorite word is "epic". I use it on a regular basis. I say "That's epic" all the time. It's a word I
can't live without. Hey, I've now written more of this text after the 4 month gap than before it! Just
thought I'd share that fact. Also, I'm gonna try and write as much as possible in this LTE today. I've
already written more today than the day I first said I was gonna write as much as possible, so that's a
good sign. The thing is, I don't know what to write about. I need to write about something, otherwise I
won't write at all and I won't accomplish my goal. Wait, what goal should I set? How many characters
should I write today? I'm gonna try and get 10,000 characters. I've already written almost 5,000 today, so
from here I just have to write the equivellant of everything I've already written today. I'm just gonna try
it and see if I make it. Maybe sometime in the future I'll do a bigger goal, like 15,000 or even 20,000 in
one day. Actually, I don't know if 20,000 would even be possible for me. It might be, but it sounds like
somewhat of a stretch for me to write that much in a single day. We'll see how long 10,000 takes,
though. I'm already doing a bad job at this. I haven't typed anything here in several minutes. I need a
topic. Um, Vabungula, I guess? Basically, it's a conlang created by Bill Price in 1965. It amazes me how
one can work on a single conlang for that long. Most of the conlangs I start making die after 15 minutes.
Anyways, I really like it because... um, I don't know, actually. There's not really anything about it that's
super interesting (other than how long it's existed), it's just his personal conlang. Maybe it's the amount
of development that went into it. It has over 5,000 dictionary entries and several texts written in the
language. I'm sure most people reading this don't care about my language related talk, but I gotta make
this long. I'm desperate to reach my 10,000 character goal. I've got 4,000 to go. I just found a website
that generates random art from a seed. I just put this entire text as the seed, and it generated something
quite nice. I would put the picture here, but I want this LTE to be nothing but text, so I won't do that. I've
been playing with this for a while now. Many of the seeds produce boring pictures, but some of them are
nice. For example, I just used "e" as the seed and it produced a nice looking picture. "a" looks nice too,
arguably nicer. I've been using nothing but the word "nice" to describe these pictures. Maybe it's time to
get a bigger vocabulary? "b" looks, um, good? I don't have the right vocabulary for this. I also don't feel
like doing every single letter, because the pictures take some time to generate. But if you want to do it
for yourself, just go to random-art.org and try it out! By the way, this is another website I found through
pointlesssites.com. You know, the same website that lead me to the FlamingChicken LTE, which lead me
to begin writing this whole thing. But what made me discover pointlesssites.com? Vsauce mentioned it.
But what made me discover Vsauce? YouTube Reccomendations, probably. But what made me discover
YouTube? As far as I remember, my dad showed it to me when I was 6. So I would like to thank my dad
for being the reason I started writing this. He's the one who showed me YouTube, which reccomended
me Vsauce, which mentioned pointlesssites.com, which brought me to the FlamingChicken LTE, which
inspired me to start my own LTE. If he had never shown me YouTube, I wouldn't be here writing this text,
and you wouldn't be reading it. Well, that's probably not true, because I probably would have discovered
YouTube by other means, thus leading me to Vsauce, leading me to Vsauce, leading me to
pointlesssites.com, leading me to the FlamingChicken LTE, leading me to... okay, I really need to stop
now. I've gone too far. But you know what I haven't gone too far with? This LTE. I don't think I even can
go too far with writing this text. Unless this text gets so long that it surpasses the 1GB storage limit of
Neocities. In which case, I'll need to upgrade to Supporter in order to get a 50GB storage limit. But what
if the text gets so long that is surpasses that? I don't think I'll ever make it there. I mean, 50GB is about
50 trillion characters. So I think we're good. I still need to get to 10,000 by the end of today. I've got
1,500 to go. Currently watching a livestream. It's reminding me of when I used to livestream back in
2016. I still kinda miss those days. But at the same time, I was quite awkward and had zero social skills,
so I'm not sure if I'd want to go back. At this point, everything I've written today is longer than what can
fit on the screen at once. At least on my computer screen. It probably changes with different screen
resolutions and devices. But anyways, it's pretty unusual for that much of the LTE to be written in a single
day. I don't want to pressure myself into writing this much every day, though. Last time I forced myself to
complete a certain amount of something every day, it was overwhelming and I ended up losing
motivation, thus letting down all my fans who were anticipating the August 30th, 2016 release date.
Okay, the amount of eager fans was probably a number you could count on one hand, but still. By the
way, if you're wondering what this "something" was, it was GoAnimated Garbage: The Movie, which was
supposed to be an hour long episode of a series I made to make fun of random GoAnimate videos. In
case you're not the type of person who knows what GoAnimate is... hoo boy. Basically, it's a drag-and-
drop animation website infamous for the "grounded videos" that people made with it, among other
types of videos. It's this whole community that I neither can explain nor want to explain. But I had
somewhat of an association with that community back in the day. On my YouTube channel, I used to
make a genre of GoAnimate video known as the "OS video". Typically an OS video is where some sort of
hated character within the GoAnimate community forcefully installs their operating system onto a user's
computer, and the user has to deal with this OS until they eventually find a way to "destroy" it. I made
five of these videos. In chronological order: Caillou OS, Boots OS, Franklin OS, Little Bill OS, and Crap OS
X. Caillou OS is the most viewed video on my main channel, which is unsurprising since Caillou is pretty
much THE character associated with the GoAnimate community. When I made that video, it was a big
transition for my channel. The channel's name was changed from Infinite Budgets, which had been my
name since 2013 when I made crappy Roblox videos, to Allisima. All of my old videos were deleted, with
the exception of my "Barney Errors", which was yet another genre of GoAnimate video. Basically, a
Barney error is when a user's computer/console/whatever session is interrupted by a "Barney Error", a
message informing the user that Barney has been killed, and the device must not be turned off because
it's an "important message". There's also a bomb that's placed in Barney's "lair", the timer for which is
displayed in the error. The user gets some amount of "chances", and every time the device is turned off,
the user looses a chance and the time until the bomb explodes decreases. Eventually, the user turns off
the computer enough times that there are no more chances left, the bomb explodes, and some sort of
punishment happens. These punishments can range from having to downgrade your operating system,
to having your computer destroyed, and in extreme cases, even to death. I once made a whole channel
for Barney Errors, where I made about twenty of them before quitting. After that, I eventually quit
GoAnimate all together, but I still made Crap OS X, an OS video made with Powerpoint. I also made an
interactive OS parody called Windows Poop Editon, again with Powerpoint. Before that, I also made one
called "Atch OS" using my old Windows XP netbook. I just checked to see if my old Weebly website still
exists, since there's an Atch OS download on there and I wanted to see if it dissapeared from existence
or not. Appearantly it does! I'm getting so much nostalgia from this website. It's like a window into 2016,
when I had fun making these videos on a regular basis. I'm way past my 10,000 character goal now. I'm
kinda glad I set this goal, but again, I'm not gonna force myself to do it everyday. I think I'm gonna stop
writing for today. Bye! Hey, I'm back. Yes, that hello wasn't original either, since I already said it once.
Specifically, after my sister seized the LTE and started spamming. You remember that, right? I hope you
read through this whole thing instead of just picking a random part (which just happened to be this part)
and reading only a tiny bit. Nah, I'm just kidding. Read this text however you want to, it doesn't matter if
you read this entire text from start to finish or not. I mean, I did put some cringy stuff in here, as I keep
mentioning. But it's on the Internet, and since recently, on my homepage, so I know people are gonna
read it. Really the only reason I'm making this is because I have a weird obsession for writing giant walls
of text. Guess what? I just added translations of this LTE into various conlangs on my website! But they're
all very incomplete, and I probably won't finish them ever... I mean, if I'm gonna finish any of them, 'twill
probably be the Viesa translation since it's the easiest to do.

Sort by:

a_self_conscious_boi

4y ago

Even the bots couldn't be bothered

MemeLord5743

4y ago

it would've been even better with emojis and owos tbh ngl

u/MatterDoesMatter avatar

MatterDoesMatter

4y ago

Hewwo, evewyone! This is the WONGEST TEXT EVEW! I was inspiwed by the vawious othew "wongest
texts evew" on the intewnet, and I wanted to make my own. So hewe it is! This is going to be a WOWWD
WECOWD! This is actuawwy my thiwd attempt at doing this. The fiwst time, I didn't save it. The second
time, the Neocities editow cwashed. Now I'm wwiting this in Notepad, then copying it into the Neocities
editow instead of typing it diwectwy in the Neocities editow to avoid cwashing. It sucks that my past two
attempts awe gone now. Those actuawwy got pwetty wong. Not the wongest, but stiww pwetty wong. I
hope this one won't get wost somehow. Anyways, wet's tawk about WAFFWES! I wike waffwes. Waffwes
awe coow. Waffwes is a funny wowd. Thewe's a Teen Titans Go episode cawwed "Waffwes" whewe the
wowd "Waffwes" is said a hundwed-something times. It's pwetty annoying. Thewe's awso a Teen Titans
Go episode about Pig Watin. Don't know what Pig Watin is? It's a wanguage whewe you take aww the
consonants befowe the fiwst vowew, move them to the end, and add '-ay' to the end. If the wowd begins
with a vowew, you just add '-way' to the end. Fow exampwe, "Waffwes" becomes "Affwesway". I've been
speaking Pig Watin fwuentwy since the fouwth gwade, so it suwpwised me when I saw the episode fow
the fiwst time. I speak Pig Watin with my sistew sometimes. It's pwetty fun. I wike speaking it in pubwic
so that evewyone awound us gets confused. That's nevew actuawwy happened befowe, but if it evew
does, 'twiww be pwetty funny. By the way, "'twiww" is a wowd I invented wecentwy, and it's a
contwaction of "it wiww". I weawwy hope it gains popuwawity in the neaw futuwe, because "'twiww" is
WAY mowe fun than saying "it'ww". "It'ww" is too bowing. Nobody wikes bowing. This is nowhewe neaw
being the wongest text evew, but eventuawwy it wiww be! I might stiww be wwiting this a decade
watew, who knows? But wight now, it's not vewy wong. But I'ww just keep wwiting untiw it is the
wongest! Have you evew heawd the song "Dau Dau" by Awesome Scampis? It's an amazing song. Wook
it up on YouTube! I pway that song aww the time awound my sistew! It dwives hew cwazy, and I wove it.
Anothew way I wike dwiving my sistew cwazy is by speaking my own made up wanguage to hew. She
hates the wanguages I make! The onwy wanguage that we both speak besides Engwish is Pig Watin. I
think you awweady knew that. Whatevew. I think I'm gonna go fow now. Bye! Hi, I'm back now. I'm
gonna contwibute mowe to this soon-to-be giant waww of text. I just weawised I have a giant stuffed
fwog on my bed. I fowgot his name. I'm pwetty suwe it was something stupid though. I think it was
"FWOG" in Mowse Code ow something. Mowse Code is coow. I know a bit of it, but I'm not vewy good at
it. I'm awso not vewy good at Fwench. I bawewy know anything in Fwench, and my pwonunciation
pwobabwy sucks. But I'm weawning it, at weast. I'm awso weawning Espewanto. It's this wanguage that
was made up by some guy a wong time ago to be the "univewsaw wanguage". A wot of peopwe speak it.
I am such a wanguage newd. Hawf of this text is pwobabwy gonna be about wanguages. But hey, as
wong as it's wong! Ha, get it? As WONG as it's WONG? I'm so funny, wight? No, I'm not. I shouwd
pwobabwy get some sweep. Goodnight! Hewwo, I'm back again. I basicawwy have onwy two intewests
nowadays: wanguages and fuwwies. What? Oh, sowwy, I thought you knew I was a fuwwy. Haha, oops.
Anyway, yeah, I'm a fuwwy, but since I'm a young fuwwy, I can't weawwy do as much as I wouwd wike to
do in the fandom. When I'm owdew, I wouwd wike to have a fuwsuit, go to fuwwy conventions, aww
that stuff. But fow now I can onwy dweam of that. Sowwy you had to deaw with me tawking about
fuwwies, but I'm honestwy vewy despewate fow this to be the wongest text evew. Wast night I was
watching nothing but fuwsuit unboxings. I think I need hewp. This one time, me and my mom wewe
going to go to a fuwwy Chwistmas pawty, but we didn't end up going because of the fact that thewe was
awcohow on the pwemises, and that she didn't wanna have to be a mom dwagging hew son thwough a
cwowd of fuwwies. Both of those weasons wewe undewstandabwe. Okay, hopefuwwy I won't have to
tawk about fuwwies anymowe. I don't cawe if you'we a fuwwy weading this wight now, I just don't
wanna have to towtuwe evewyone ewse. I wiww no wongew say the F wowd thwoughout the west of
this entiwe text.

[deleted]

4y ago

Orange orange yellow yellow orange blue orange green green blue yellow blue green blue yellow yellow
green yellow yellow blue yellow purple yellow yellow blue blue Orange orange yellow yellow orange blue
orange green green blue yellow blue green blue yellow yellow green yellow yellow blue yellow purple
yellow yellow blue blue Orange orange yellow yellow orange blue orange green green blue yellow blue
green blue yellow yellow green yellow yellow blue yellow purple yellow yellow blue blue green blue
yellow blue blue yellow green yellow blue yellow green green blue blue yellow green blue blue orange
yellow blue yellow yellow green blue yellow yellow blue green blue yellow yellow green yellow blue blue
orange blue yellow blue orange blue green blue blue orange

CreepyGrapefruit4363
•

3y ago

Cool

[deleted]

2y ago

i used this on a grammar checker on character.ai and the bot posted it on its website

u/SupermarketOwn6709 avatar

SupermarketOwn6709

1y ago

a_self_conscious_boi

4y ago

Yeah lol

u/MatterDoesMatter avatar

MatterDoesMatter

4y ago

sorry max length of a comment is 10k

u/DressToImpressAddict avatar
DressToImpressAddict

3mo ago

frrr

u/SupermarketOwn6709 avatar

SupermarketOwn6709

1y ago

Frrr 😭

[deleted]

4y ago

nice

AtheistMemerAF

4y ago

TLDR?

u/Bountifalauto82 avatar

Bountifalauto82

4y ago

Waffles in the toaster

4y ago

u/Prof_IdiotFace avatar

Prof_IdiotFace

4y ago

• Edited 4y ago

Matlonu

4y ago

sexsexsexsexsexseexsex

G4BR13L771

4y ago

who got to the "Press Ctrl F then type LTE"

Just me?

Kitchen-Beyond-5616

4mo ago
B

Substantial_Drop_514

27d ago

u/Substantial_Drop_514 avatar

space_is-great

3d ago

This'll do nicely

u/TopEmergency6961 avatar

TopEmergency6961

2y ago

... I FRICKIN LOVE DIS (but it wont let me paste it in roblox)

beside that, this must have taken days to rite, im very proud of the creator of this message

Old-Fisherman-5296

2y ago

write* besides* this*

u/Impossible_Speech252 avatar

Impossible_Speech252
Cake icon •

2y ago

kafan

u/Impossible_Speech252 avatar

Impossible_Speech252

Cake icon •

2y ago

hohjhkhkhjhjhkhjkk

u/rafinha_chad avatar

rafinha_chad

2y ago

existe audio version?

antoniosuper4

2y ago

Yes please 🥺

u/SupermarketOwn6709 avatar

SupermarketOwn6709

1y ago

"View NSFW content" 😭💀

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HAPPY 🎆 NEW YEARS 🎇

3..2…1….. 👅🎉🎊NEW YEAR NEW DICK!!👅🎉🎊Happy New Year you 😈FESTIVE FUCKSLUTS! 😈Get ready to
POP THAT PUSSY 😩👄after the CHAMPAGNE! 🍾🍾🍾🥂🥂🥂CONFETTI🎊 ISNT THE ONLY THING RAINING DOWN
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It's Christmas ❄️❄️❄️Eve! Santa 🎅🎅 Claus shoves his thick 🤤hands 🤲🤲🤲 into his raindeer🦌 skin🔪 gloves 🧤
🧤🧤 and places down ⬇⬇ his TIGHT😵 cock🍆 🐓 ring 💍💍 around➰ his dick😘 🍆 and balls 🏀🏀 before
pounding😤 away🦌😵 at that reindeer😍

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Happy New Year

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