10.4324_9781315784007_previewpdf
10.4324_9781315784007_previewpdf
10.4324_9781315784007_previewpdf
Second Edition
This page intentionally left blank
The Bisexual Option
Second Edition
Fritz Klein, MD
Foreword by
Regina U. Reinhardt, PhD
ROUTLEDGE
Routledge
Taylor & Francis Group
New York London
First published by
Harrington Park Press, an imprint of The Haworth Press, Inc., 10 Alice Street, Binghamton, NY
\3904-\580
© \993 by The Haworth Press, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be reproduced
or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying,
microfilm and recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission
in writing from the publisher.
Klein, Fred.
The bisexual option I Fritz Klein.-2nd ed.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references and index.
ISBN 1-56023-033-9 (acid free paper).
1. Bisexuality-United States. 2. Sex (Psychology) 3. Sex customs-United States. I. Title.
HQ74.K55 1993 92-44323
306.76'5-dc20 CIP
ToM.S.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Foreword ix
Regina U. Reinhardt, PhD
Acknowledgements xi
Bibliography 201
Index 207
Foreword
xi
Xli THE BISEXUAL OPTION
From MAN & WOMAN, BOY & GIRL by John Money and Anke
Ehrhardt, Copyright © 1972 by The Johns Hopkins University
Press, by permission of the publishers.
York, is the only one from Wilde to his wife that is known to have
survived.)
The Threat
The New York Public Library, known for its liberality, has two
monographs on bisexuality. No books.
Why?
The Index Medicus, which lists all articles appearing in scientific
journals on every conceivable medical subject, had 47 pieces on
homosexuality. None at all on bisexuality. The category is omitted
altogether.
Why?
The New York Psychoanalytic Institute, one of the major orga-
nizations of its kind in America and, indeed, in the world, has in its
library catalogue over 600 items on the subject of homosexuality-
and only 60 on bisexuality.
A few weeks prior to gathering the above information for the first
edition of this book, I received a call from a friend asking me to
lunch. Liz is the wife of a successful New York designer of
women's clothes. There was an urgency in her tone that caused me
to respond with an immediate yes, although I was quite busy.
"I'm free tomorrow," I said.
"I need to talk to you today."
"How about a drink around four?"
"Your office?"
"Fine."
When she arrived I poured her a drink. As we sat down she said,
"Do you always offer your patients a drink?"
"I hardly consider you a patient."
"Well, I don't know. You'd better tum on the tape. I may never
say again what I'm about to say now."
I switched on the machine.
3
4 THE BISEXUAL OPTION
"You know that Bill and I have been married for over twenty
years. "
"Quite happily, from all appearances."
"In our case appearances are not deceiving. We are very happy."
"So you and Bill are not the problem."
"In a sense, we are. How do I put this?" She sat a while staring
into her glass. "About a month ago we were at a dinner party and
this psychologist was there, an expert of some kind. He was holding
forth on the nature of sexuality and he said that the homosexual and
heterosexual were facts of life, and that the bisexual didn't exist.
Bill challenged that opinion and the psychologist just took him
apart, saying that the bisexual is nothing more than a closet gay. Bill
really felt bad when we left. Bill said he didn't believe anything the
psychologist said, but still he couldn't come up with an effective
rebuttal. Since that incident we've been in constant dialogue over
biseXUality. We've talked about little else, and it's begun to affect
his work and our lives. There are the children to think about, and ...
oh my God, I don't know where to begin."
"Which of you is bisexual?"
"We both are." She stopped to light a cigarette. "Does that
surprise you?"
"It's been rumored for years that Bill is gay and that your mar-
riage is a front."
"Do you believe that?"
"No."
"What do you ... what have you believed about us?"
"That you are a couple very much in love. That Bill is bisexual
and that you are heterosexual."
"You didn't suspect about me?"
"No. I suppose because you haven't been that open about it. Bill
has been known to flirt now and then with both men and women."
"He hates the 'gay' label. Not because of the connotation-God,
half the people we know are gay-but because it simply isn't true. I
feel ... ah ... well, that's it. I really don't know how to label
myself. Neither does Bill. For years we entertained the possibility
that we were supemeurotic. But now Bill feels that he's not neurotic
but just the opposite. Healthy."
"What do you think?"
The Threat 5
"You know that there is a flood of opinion out there that would
drown both Bill and me with an army of experts to say that you
can't be bisexual and healthy. Bill is better off being thought of as
gay, with his marriage as a front, than he is as a bisexual."
"Does Bill know you called me?"
"Yes. We both want to resolve this. We hate being told we don't
exist sexually. Do we? Does the bisexual exist outside of being a
confused gay, or just sex-mad?"
"Not according to many experts."
"How do you feel?"
"One, I think it's a presumption to tell people they do not exist.
And two, I think the bisexual not only exists independently of the
homosexual label, but exists period."
"Can you prove that?"
"Well," I laughed, "that's a tall order at the moment. I have a
patient coming in a few minutes, but give me some time to think
about it."
When Liz left I took down a book from my shelves called
Changing Homosexuality in the Male by Dr. Lawrence J. Hatterer. I
had read the book previously and I remembered that the point of
view toward the bisexual was on the side of nonexistence.
In a list describing common and uncommon homosexual subcul-
tures, Dr. Hatterer places the bisexual in the "disguised" group-
along with closet queens and married males who regularly practice
homosexuality. This almost universally held opinion is passed on to
the public, both heterosexual and homosexual. And because it is
easier to accept and understand the bisexual as a disguised homo-
sexual, public acceptance of expert opinion goes for the most part
unchallenged.
As disguised homosexual, the bisexual is by this process "re-
duced." We tend to categorize people, to put them into the most
readily available group. In the worlds of commerce, government,
and religion, this is to some degree logical. That this mistaken
practice is also adopted by the individual in his or her search for
self-identity-and held onto at all costs for lack of a suitable alterna-
tive-is tragic.
This is what Liz means when she says that Bill is better off being
thought of as gay. Taking it further, if public and expert opinion are
6 THE BISEXUAL OPTION
"We don't know what to feel. Do you know that she and the
woman she's living with have an open relationship?"
"What does that mean to you?" I asked.
"Well, it means that she sees other people as well. One of them is
a man."
"She's had too much freedom. That's her problem." The father's
voice was choked with anger. "A man here, a woman there. You
can't live that way. You're one thing or you're another. That's the
danger. Too much freedom. She's a lesbian now, no matter what she
says to rationalize her disgusting behavior."
"Has she suggested to you that she's a bisexual?"
"We don't believe that for a minute," he said. "She's telling us
that just so we won't make trouble for her."
"Why do you say that?" I asked.
"You're one thing or you're another." The father banged his fist
on my desk. "I've lived long enough to know that, and I've been in
business too long to believe anyone who says they're one thing
today and another thing tomorrow. How long would you and I be in
business, doctor, if we lived that way?"
"Your daughter's love life is not a business."
He got up, ready to leave. "One way or another, it's all business."
The calling-a-spade-a-spade point of view has a certain unvar-
nished, up-front honesty that I frankly admire. Artlessness is sel-
dom without genuine charm, but that does not transform it into the
truth. To understand the complexity of extradimensional choice
requires more than mere straightforwardness, however tutored by
experience it might be.
"Won't you sit for a while longer?" I pointed to his chair. "We
all have your daughter's best interest at heart."
For the next half hour or so I became their ally in the wish for a
psychosexually secure future for their child. It says much for them
that after a few more sessions they did eventually come to accept, if
not respect, their daughter's choice oflove object. But they held fast
to the view that "One way or another, it's all business."
Labeling is a tried and true method of eliminating the threats of
uncertainty, ambiguity, fear. A familiar old myth illustrates this. In
the form of an ill-contrived joke, it says that a man may father many
beautiful children, be a transcendent lover of women, earn numerous
10 THE BISEXUAL OPTION
despite its lovely light-has had a high price exacted upon it by both
history and conventional wisdom.
The state of nonexistence is indeed dangerous. Liz and Bill, both
children of their time, are among its victims.
The New York Public Library, the Index Medicus, and the New
York Psychoanalytic Institute pronounce a harsh judgment on bi-
sexuality by saying little or nothing. At least we now better under-
stand why there is such a profound silence.
References
Baldwin, James . Giovanni's Room. New York: Dell Publishing Co., 1964.
Bell, Clive. Civilization. New York: Harcourt Brace and Co., 1926.
Bieber, I. , H.J. Dain , P. R. Dince , M. G. Drelich , H. G. Grand , R. H. Gundlach , M. W.
Kremer , A. H. Rifkin , C. B. Wilber , and T. B. Bieber , (1962). Homosexuality: A
Psychoanalytic Study. New York: Basic Books.
Billy, John O. G. , Koray Tanfer , William R. Grady , and Daniel H. Klepinger , “The Sexual
Behavior of Men in the United States.” Family Planning Perspectives. Vol. 25, No. 2
(March/April 1993), pp. 52–60.
Blumstein, Philip W. , and Pepper Schwartz . “Bisexuality in Men.” Urban Life, Vol. 5, No. 3
(Oct. 1976), pp. 339–358.
Blumstein, Philip W. , and Pepper Schwartz . “Bisexuality in Women.” Archives of Sexual
behavior, Vol. 5 (March 1976), pp. 171–181.
Bode, Janet . View from Another Closet. New York: Hawthorn Books, 1976.
Bolton, Mary , and Peter Weatherburn . Literature Review on Bisexuality and HIV
Transmission. Report Commissioned by the Global Programme on AIDS, World Health
Organization, Academic Dept. of Public Health, St. Mary's Hospital Medical School. London:
1990.
Brain, Robert . Friends and Lovers. New York: Basic Books, 1976.
Brown, Howard . Familiar Faces, Hidden Lives: The Story of Homosexual Men in America
Today. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1976.
Buxton, Amity Pierce . The Other Side of the Closet. Santa Monica, CA: IBS Press, Inc.,
1991.
Colette . Earthly Paradise. New York: Farrar, Straus & Giroux, 1966.
Crosland, Margaret . Colette, The Difficulty of Loving. New York: Bobbs Merrill, 1973.
Dannecker, Martin , and Reimut Reiche . Der Gewöhnliche Homosexuelle. Frankfurt: S.
Fischer Verlag GmbH, 1974.
David, Deborah S. , and Robert Brannon . The Forty-Nine Percent Majority: The Male Sex
Role. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley, 1976.
Drury, Allen . Advise and Consent. New York: Avon Books, 1974.
Fox, Ronald C. Coming Out Bisexual: Identity, Behavior, and Sexual Orientation Self-
Disclosure. Unpublished doctoral dissertation, California Institute of Integral Studies, San
Francisco, CA, 1993.
Freedman, Alfred M. , and Harold I. Kaplan , Eds. Comprehensive Textbook of Psychiatry.
Baltimore: Williams and Wilkins, 1967.
Freud, Sigmund . 1925, SE, XIX, p. 258.
Geller, Thomas . Bisexuality: A Reader and Sourcebook. California: Times Change Press,
1990.
Gilliatt, Penelope . Sunday Bloody Sunday. New York: Viking Press, 1971.
Goode, Eriche , and Richard Troiden . Sexual Deviance and Sexual Deviants. New York:
William Morrow and Co., 1975.
Gould, Robert E. “Homosexuality.” The New York Times Magazine, February 24, 1974.
Harrison, James . “A Critical Evaluation of Research on ‘Masculinity/Femininity.’” Department
of Psychology Dissertation, New York University, 1975.
Hatterer, Lawrence J. Changing Homosexuality in the Male. New York: McGraw-Hill, 1970.
Heilbrun, Carolyn G. Toward a Recognition of Androgyny. New York: Knopf, 1973.
Hemingway, Ernest . “The Sea Change” in The Short Stories of Ernest Hemingway. New
York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1921–1938.
Holroyd, Michael . Lytton Strachey. New York: Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1967.
Homey, Karen . Neurosis and Human Growth. New York: W. W. Norton, 1950.
Hunt, Morton . Sexual Behavior in the Seventies. Chicago: Playboy Press, 1974.
Hutchins, Loraine and Lani Kaahumanu , Eds. Bi Any Other Name:Bisexual People Speak
Out. Boston: Alyson Publications, Inc., 1991.
Hyde, H. Montgomery . Oscar Wilde: A Biography. New York: Farrar, Straus and Giroux,
1975.
Johnstone, J. K. The Bloomsbury Group. New York: Noonday Press, 1963.
Kardiner, A. , A. Karush , and L. Ovesey , (1959). “A Methodological Study of Freudian
Theory.” Journal of Nervous and Mental Diseases, Vol. 129, pp. 133–143.
Karlen, Arno . Sexuality & Homosexuality. New York: W. W. Norton, 1971.
Katz, Jonathan . Gay American History. New York: Thomas Y. Crowell Co., 1976.
Kinsey, Alfred C. , Wardell B. Pomeroy , and Clyde E. Martin . Sexual Behavior in the Human
Male. Philadelphia, W. B. Saunders Co., 1948.
Kinsey, Alfred C. , Wardell B. Pomeroy , Clyde E. Martin , and Paul H. Gebhard . Sexual
Behavior in the Human Female. Philadelphia: W. B. Saunders Co., 1953.
Klein, Fritz , B. Sepekoff , and T. J. Wolf . “Sexual Orientation: A Multivariable Dynamic
Process” in Klein, F. , and T. J. Wolf , Eds. Bisexualities: Theory and Research. New York:
The Haworth Press, 1985.
Klein, Fritz . “The Need to View Sexual Orientation as a Multivariable Dynamic Process: A
Theoretical Perspective” in McWhirter, D. P. , S. A. Sanders , J. M. Reinisch ,
Homosexuality/Hetero-sexuality. New York, Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1990.
Koestler, Arthur . The Act of Creation. New York: Macmillan, 1964.
Lawrence, D. H. The Fox. New York: Viking Press, 1923.
Lawrence, D. H. . Women in Love. New York: Viking Press, 1920.
LeGuin, Ursula K. The Left Hand of Darkness. New York: Ace Books, 1969.
Levin, Robert J. , and Amy Levin : “Sexual Pleasure.” Redbook, Vol. 145, No. 5 and 6,
September and October 1975.
Licht, Hans . Sexual Life in Ancient Greece. London: The Abbey Library, 1932.
Mann, Thomas . Death in Venice. New York: Knopf, 1930.
Maugham, Robin . Escape from the Shadows. New York: McGraw-Hill, 1972.
McWhirter, David , and Andrew Mattison . Personal Communication, 1977.
Mead, Margaret. “Bisexuality: What's It All About?” Redbook, January 1975.
Menard, W. The Two Worlds of Somerset Maugham. Los Angeles: Sherbourne Press, 1965.
Mitchell, Yvonne. Colette: A Taste for Life. New York: Harcourt, Brace, Jovanovich, 1975.
Money, John. quoted in “The New Bisexuals.” Time, May 13, 1974.
Money, John , and Anke A. Ehrhardt . Man and Woman, Boy and Girl. Baltimore: The Johns
Hopkins University Press, 1972.
Morris, Desmond. Intimate Behaviour. New York: Random House, 1972.
Mullahy, Patrick. Oedipus Myth and Complex. New York: Grove Press, 1948.
Murray, Jane. The Kings & Queens of England. New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1974.
Nicolson, Nigel. Portrait of a Marriage. New York: Atheneum, 1973.
Off Pink Collective , Eds. Bisexual Lives. London: Off Pink Publishing, 1988.
Painter, G. D. André Gide: A Critical & Biographical Study. London: Arthur Barker, 1951.
Reinhardt, Regina Ursula. Bisexual Women in Heterosexual Relationships. Dissertation
published in: Research Abstracts International, Fall 1986, Vol. II, Issue 3, p. 67.
Renault, Mary. The Nature of Alexander. New York: Pantheon Books, 1975.
Rosenbaum, S. P. , Ed. The Bloomsbury Group. Toronto: University of Toronto Press, 1975.
Rowse, A. L. Homosexuals in History. New York: Macmillan, 1977.
Ruitenbeek, Hendrik. The New Sexuality. New York: New Viewpoints, 1974.
Rule, Jane. Lesbian Images. New York: Doubleday, 1975.
Saghir, Marcel T. , and Eli Robins Male and Female Homosexuality. Baltimore: Williams and
Wilkins, 1973.
Shainess, Natalie . quoted in “The New Bisexuals.” Time, May 13, 1974.
Sievers, W. David. Freud on Broadway. New York: Cooper Square Publishers, 1970.
Singer, June. Androgyny. New York: Anchor Press, 1976.
Socarides, Charles W. The Overt Homosexual. New York: Grune and Stratton, 1968.
Socarides, Charles W. . “Bisexual Chic: Anyone Goes.” Newsweek, May 27, 1974.
Stekel, Wilhelm. Bi-Sexual Love. New York: Emerson Books, 1950 (1922).
Tavris, Carol. “Men & Women Report Their Views on Masculinity.” Psychology Today,
January 1977.
Tielman, Rob A.P. , Manuel Carballo , and Aart C. Hendriks , Eds. Bisexuality and HIV/AIDS:
A Global Perspective. Buffalo, New York: Prometheus Books, 1991.
Vidal, Gore. The City and the Pillar. New York: New American Library, 1974.
Warren, Patricia Nell. The Front Runner. New York: William Morrow and Co., 1974.
Watzlawick, Paul , J. H. Beavin , and D.D. Jackson Pragmatics of Human Communication.
New York: W. W. Norton, 1967.
Weinberg, George. Society and the Healthy Homosexual. New York: St. Martin's Press,
1972.
Weinberg, Martin S. , and Colin J. Williams Male Homosexuals. New York: Oxford University
Press, 1974.
Weinberg, Martin S. , Colin J. Williams and Douglas Pryor , Dual Attraction: Bisexuality in the
Age of AIDS. New York: Oxford University Press, 1994.
Weinrich, James D. Sexual Landscapes. New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1987.
Weise, Elizabeth Reba , Ed. Closer to Home, Bisexuality and Feminism. Seattle: The Seal
Press, 1992.
Williams, Tennessee. Memoirs. New York: Doubleday, 1972.
Wolf, Charlotte. Bisexuality: A Study. London: Quartet Books Ltd., 1977.
Woolf, Virginia. Orlando. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1928.
Woolf, Virginia. The Death of the Moth. New York: Harcourt Brace and Co., 1942.
Zessen, van G. J. and T. Sandfort (editors). Sexualiteit in Nederland. Lisse, Swets, en
Zeitlinger, 1991.