Transcript - “Listening Time” Episode 146

Welcome to the Listening Time Podcast. Hey everybody, this is Conner, and
you're listening to Episode 146 of the Listening Time Podcast. I hope you're all doing
fantastic. And I hope that your English learning is going well, and that maybe you're
starting to speak and have conversations in English. I know that it's hard when you rst
start speaking English.
And that's actually what we're going to talk about in today's episode. I want to
talk about why people are afraid to speak English. I think that this episode will be
helpful for all of you, especially if you're just starting to speak, or maybe you haven't
spoken yet. You’re still waiting, and you're a little bit worried about starting. I think that
this episode will help you if you're in that situation.
And I think that it will give you a little bit of motivation to start if you feel like
you're getting to the point where you're ready to speak, because you understand a lot,
but you're a little bit afraid. I hope that after listening to this, you'll feel a little bit more
con dent to start this process of speaking in English. So, that's what we'll talk about
today. So, I'm sure you'll like this episode.
And if you feel like you understand me really well already, and you want to
practice with something more di cult, then I recommend that you sign up to become a
Listening Time Family Member so you can practice with my advanced episodes, in
which I speak fast. So, the link to sign up is down below in the Episode Description.
That's www.patreon.com/listeningtime
And if you want something even more challenging, then you can practice with
my US Conversations Podcast, in which I have conversations with di erent English
speakers from around the country. They're all teachers who teach English. And we talk
about a lot of di erent topics. And with this podcast, you'll also just learn a lot about
the country, about the US in general. It's a lot of fun, it's great practice for you. So, the
link is also down below. That's www.patreon.com/USConversations
And, as always, please share this podcast with any English learners that you
know, and please give it a ve-star rating and write a review on Spotify or Apple
podcasts. Alright, let's get started.
Okay, let's talk about why people are afraid to speak English. In this episode, I'm
going to talk about the three main reasons, in my opinion, why people are afraid to
speak English. And we'll talk about why people have that fear, and I'll try to relieve your
fears a little bit. Hopefully, you won't feel as afraid after listening.
And before I mention these three reasons why people are afraid to speak, I want
to note that I still think that it's important to be able to understand English pretty well
before you start speaking consistently. I'm not saying you have to do this. Everyone
has di erent philosophies when it comes to language learning, and I'm not saying that
I'm right, and everyone else is wrong.
However, in my experience, having conversations with people from all over the
world, students who are learning English from many di erent countries… I've done this
for many years… I've talked to many people for thousands of hours… so, I'm speaking
from experience here when I say that, when people can't understand me well during
our conversation, the conversation does not go well. It's not a very helpful hour or half
an hour that we spend, when the student can't understand me well.
fi
ff
ff
fi
ffi
ff
ff
fi
 However, if they understand me, well, then that 30 minutes or one hour is very
useful for them. They get to practice their speaking naturally, and it's bene cial. But if
they don't understand me, the conversation just doesn't go well. It's very unnatural. I
have to repeat things many times or translate them, and it's just not that fun.
So, in my opinion… this is only my opinion, but I'm speaking from experience…
if you can't understand English pretty well, then that should be your focus. You should
focus on understanding English pretty well… not perfectly, of course… maybe not even
to an advanced level, but you should be able to understand pretty well, and then that
will really help you get started with your speaking. Okay?
Alright, that being said, let's talk about the rst reason why many people are
afraid to speak, and that is, they're afraid that they're going to say the wrong thing. In
other words, they think that they will make a lot of mistakes, whether it be with
grammar, or vocabulary. They’re going to say the wrong word, or use the wrong
structure. Many people are afraid of this.
And this is inevitable. When we say that something is “inevitable,” we're saying
that it can't be avoided. So, when you start speaking English, it's inevitable that you're
going to say the wrong words many times, okay? That's not something you can avoid.
And it's not something that you will avoid when you're uent, even, because uency
does not mean perfect accuracy. Fluency and accuracy are two di erent things.
So, even when you become uent in English, you're still going to make mistakes
sometimes, okay? So, don't have this idea that some people, when they learn English,
they don't make mistakes, and you make a lot of mistakes. No, that's not reality. We all
make mistakes. We all say things wrong. We all use the wrong words when we're
learning a language. Okay?
And most mistakes aren't signi cant. That's something really important that I
want you to remember. Most of your mistakes aren't that signi cant. Some of them are,
of course, but most of them aren't. If you use the wrong form of a verb, for example,
maybe you used the wrong verb tense, or you just didn't know how to use the verb
tense correctly. That’s usually not going to be a huge problem, okay, if you used the
present perfect, when in reality, it would have been better to use the past simple.
Sometimes, it's signi cant, but most of the time, it's not. Okay?
So, the important thing to remember is that native speakers just want to
understand you. That's what we're focused on. We're not focused on all of your
mistakes. We just want to understand what you're saying. And so, if your mistake isn't
signi cant, if it doesn't change our understanding of what you're saying, then it doesn't
really matter that much. Okay?
I'm not saying that you shouldn't try to get better and correct your mistakes. Of
course, you should do that. However, don't be afraid to make mistakes, because as
long as these mistakes don't a ect the native speakers understanding of what you're
saying, then they're not signi cant. Okay? Focus on the signi cant mistakes, for sure.
For example, a really big one is that some people have the tendency of saying “she”
when they really want to say “he.” That’s a big mistake. That’s something that will
cause a lot of problems. So, focus on those big mistakes. But to be honest, the
majority of your mistakes aren't big, so don't worry, okay?
And how do you get better at this and not make as many mistakes, not say the
wrong thing? Well, you need to have more conversations. If you can already
fi
fi
fi
ff
fl
fi
fi
fl
fi
fi
ff
fi
fl
 understand pretty well, of course, you need to continue listening, that will help you too.
That always helps, of course. But having more conversations will also eventually teach
you the correct way to speak. Okay? You’re going to develop that memory of what to
say, and what sounds natural if you speak a lot and have conversations, and you hear
the other person say things to you.
And over time, the natural, correct way to say things will become automatic for
you. But it takes time, and it's little by little, right? So, just start having conversations, if
you can understand English pretty well, and just know that you'll make mistakes. But
the conversations themselves are the training that you need to eventually not make as
many mistakes, right? Pretty simple.
So, let's talk about another reason why people are afraid to speak English. And
that is that they are afraid that they have bad pronunciation, or that they have a big
accent, a heavy accent. And I talked about this recently, in an episode. So, some of
this, you've already heard me say before, but just know that we all have pronunciation
problems. And we all have an accent. Again, we're all in the same boat here. That
phrase, “we're all in the same boat” means that we're all in the same situation. Okay?
It's not di erent for some of us. Okay?
We don't say things the way that native speakers say them when we're learning
that language, especially as an adult, right? We don't have the same muscle memory of
how to make the correct sounds, and all of that, okay? And I have this problem, big
time, in French. When we say the phrase “big time.” This is used to emphasize
something, like I'm saying, “really,” “very.”
So, I have this problem, big time, in French. My accent isn't that bad in Spanish,
or Portuguese, or maybe even Italian, even though I just started learning, but in French,
it's awful. Okay? It’s something that I really need to work on. But I know that most
other people, when they learn French, they also have a really big accent, a really heavy
accent, when they speak.
And I used the word “awful” to describe my accent, but I really shouldn't say
that, because I don't want you to think that your accent is awful or bad. I'm just making
fun of myself. When you “make fun of" someone, this means that you laugh at them
because of something negative about them. So, I'm just making fun of myself by
saying that my accent is awful.
But really, don't think of accents as being awful, good, bad. Just think of the
language and the sounds as being a system that you will get better at over time. And
don't think that your accent is terrible. Just accept that you have an accent, and you'll
work on that over time. Right?
And just like I talked about before, with saying the wrong words, saying things
the wrong way in terms of your pronunciation, or your accent… usually, this isn't too
signi cant either. Most of your pronunciation errors aren't super signi cant. They don't
a ect the native speaker’s understanding of what you're saying. Some of your mistakes
are signi cant when it comes to your pronunciation or your accent. Some of them are.
That is true, but most of them aren't.
Again, I'm trying to help you be less afraid here. I'm not saying that there aren't
signi cant mistakes. Of course there are. But most of your mistakes aren't signi cant.
So, you need to have a little more con dence, and don't be afraid of making mistakes
with vocabulary or grammar, or pronunciation.
ff
fi
fi
fi
ff
fi
fi
fi
 However, you should focus on the signi cant mistakes that you do make, and
especially if these mistakes can be easily corrected. I think in the episode about
pronunciation, I gave the example of stressing the wrong syllable in a word. This can
be very easily corrected, and it can make a big di erence in helping the native speaker
understand you.
I remember hearing this employee at a Chinese restaurant asking this native
speaker if he wanted any appetizers. And she wasn't a native speaker, this worker, and
she stressed the wrong syllable. She said “appeTIzer.” And the way she said it was
very hard to understand for the native speaker, because he was expecting her to say,
“APpetizer.” That's the correct way to say it. And he misunderstood her, and she had to
repeat it. And in that situation, it was a signi cant error, because he couldn't
understand her, but it's easily correctable. She just needs to stress the right syllable.
So, of course, to get better at things like this, we need to do a lot of listening
and to listen with the intention of hearing the way that things are pronounced. Maybe
some of your listening practice can be dedicated to focusing on the sounds of the
language, and not just on understanding the words. So, listening with that intention can
be really helpful.
And of course, I'm someone who trains people to pronounce English better. So
of course, with my membership, if you have signed up for a certain level, a certain tier,
of the membership, you'll get my pronunciation training as well. So, of course, you
have that resource, and other people have resources and can teach you pronunciation
as well.
But just know that it isn't as natural to improve your pronunciation as it is to
improve your vocabulary and grammar. So, it might be a little bit harder to improve in
this area, but you can, okay? It's possible, and with the right resources and dedicating
the time to actually practicing this, and listening intently to the sounds that you hear,
this will help. It's not easy. But you can get better over time.
But just know that all of us have pronunciation issues, and all of us have issues
with our accent when we speak foreign languages. And we, English speakers, actually
expect you to have an accent when this isn't your rst language. And we hear accents
all the time, because many people learn English as a second language. And so, we're
really accustomed to this.
Don’t be afraid that we're going to make fun of you and criticize your accent.
No, don't be afraid of that. Just know that this is normal, and try to correct the
signi cant errors, okay? But most of your pronunciation errors are not signi cant.
Okay?
And one other reason why people are afraid to speak English is because they
feel that they get stuck, like they freeze, and they can't say anything, or they don't
know how to say things. And, again, this is normal. This is something that is going to
happen to you when you rst start speaking, even if you can understand pretty well. I
always talk about how understanding English well will help you speak and get started
speaking, and that's true. However, you're still going to feel like you get stuck often,
when you rst start speaking, even if you understand well.
And this is similar to learning how to drive. I talked about this recently in a
YouTube video, and I think there will be a bonus episode about this topic, if I'm not
mistaken. And that's because I'm teaching my wife how to drive right now. So, this is
fi
fi
fi
fi
fi
ff
fi
fi
 on my mind. And this is a great comparison, because, for example, my wife, she read
the whole handbook that talks about all the rules that you need to know when driving in
California, and she had to memorize all of these things. And she had to pass a test
where she answered questions about the rules.
And she sees me drive almost every day, because we drive places. And she
sees what I do, what I don't do. She sees all of the di erent maneuvers that I make. A
“maneuver” is some type of movement that you make with some intention. So, she
sees my maneuvers. She sees what other drivers do. She can feel everything being in
the car.
So, she has all of that experience of learning how to drive, but when she actually
rst started driving, it was like she was frozen. She felt stuck, even though she knows
where the brake pedal is, how to accelerate. She knows the rules of the road. She
knows all of that, but right now, because she just started driving, actually “behind the
wheel," as we say… she's the one driving… it’s like she has to develop this muscle
memory and learn how to do these di erent things, even if she kind of already knows
them, because she's seen me do these things. She's read about them. She knows
them, but she hasn't actually done them herself.
And now, she's driven probably like six or seven times in total, and she's already
improved a ton. She's already doing very, very well, compared to her rst day driving,
because on her rst day, she felt like she didn't know what she was doing, even though
she had already learned a lot of this.
And that's exactly how it feels when you rst start speaking after you can
already understand well. You’ve heard so many words and phrases and sentences and
grammatical structures, and you understand them perfectly, but you haven't actually
spoken yet. And so, the rst time you speak, you're frozen. You don't know how to
speak very well, because you don't have that muscle memory yet. You haven't said
these things out loud yet.
But after a few sessions of speaking, you already start to feel more comfortable.
You already start to feel like you're making some improvement, and then the process
and the progress continue after that, and you eventually become a good speaker. It
works like that, just like learning how to drive. My wife, she gets all this passive
knowledge rst, and then she has to actually do it. And it's new for her, and it's hard at
the beginning. But she's developing this muscle memory, and after like a week of
driving, she's doing fantastic.
So, that's how I want you to think about this topic. When you feel stuck at the
beginning, when you don't know how to say things, just know that that's normal, and
that you're going to develop this ability through consistent speaking, okay? Of course,
tons of listening as well, but also consistent speaking, okay? This is normal, and it's
supposed to happen. And you'll get through it if you just commit to speaking
consistently. Okay?
Alright, hopefully, this episode was interesting for you, and hopefully it motivates
you to speak, if you can already understand pretty well. And don't be afraid. Don't think
you're the only one with these issues. We all have these issues. Okay?
And if you want to practice with something a little bit harder than this podcast,
make sure to become a Listening Time Family Member to get my advanced episodes.
And you can also sign up for my US Conversations Podcast to practice with my
fi
fi
fi
fi
ff
fi
ff
fi
conversations with other English speakers. So, both of those links are in the Episode
Description below this episode. And the transcript for this episode is down there as
well.
And please share this podcast, give it a ve-star rating, and write a review if you
can. Alright, thank you for listening to this episode, and I'll talk to you on the next
episode of Listening Time.
*Get my training and advanced episodes: www.patreon.com/listeningtime
*US Conversations Podcast: www.patreon.com/USConversations

fi