SEX

The Ultimate Guide

(Positions, Oral, Squirting and BDSM)
Introduction
I want to thank you and congratulate you for downloading the book, “ SEX:
The Ultimate Guide (positions, oral, squirting and BDSM) ” .
Sex is more than the act of copulation: it transcends the coming together of
two bodies. Sex is the unison of two souls willing to trust each other with
their bodies, giving to each other freely, without reservation.
Unfortunately, many of us have a very dogged understanding of sex
especially what it takes to make sex exciting at a physical and emotional
level. Many of us have dogmatic sexual reservations that cause us to,
instead of taking sex for what it ought to be—an enjoyable activity—we
end up draining the fun and enjoyment out of it.
If you are to have the best sex life possible, if you are to make sure your
partner glows with sexual enjoyment and satisfaction, you have to forsake
dogmatic sexual thinking. You have to be adventurous; you have to wear
your Indiana Jones outfit in readiness for well-deserved sexual exploration
and experimentation.
To help you embark on this explorative journey, this book is going to show
you just how exciting sex can be when you untether yourself to societal
sexual dogmas and instead, explore sex with a tinge of curiosity similar to
what Christopher Columbus had as he explored the ‘new world.’
This book is going to illustrate to you how, by changing a few things such
as engaging in oral sex, changing your sex position, and engaging in role
play, you can experience out of this world, multi-orgasmic sex.
Thanks again for downloading this book. I hope you enjoy it!
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Table of Contents
Introduction
Section 1: Breaking the Dogma—Oral Sex & Oral Sex Positions
Sexual Dogma
Understanding Oral Sex
Oral Sex Tips For Beginners
Section 2– The Fabled G-Spot: Squirting & The Best-For-G-Spot
Stimulation Sex Positions
What Is the G-spot and Squirting?
Is The G-Spot Real? The Location of the G-Spot
How to Ejaculate Through G-Spot Stimulation: A Guide for
Women and their Partners’
Best Sex Styles for G-Spot Stimulation
Section 3–Adding Some Kink To Your Sex Life: BDSM + 2 Great
Dominant Sex Positions
Kink Sex for Beginners: Understanding BDSM
A Beginners Guide to Kinky Sex: A Systematic Way to Make
BDSM Work for You
Kinky Sex Positions for the Dominant Partner
Conclusion
Section 1: Breaking the Dogma—Oral Sex & Oral
Sex Positions
This book seeks to help you break the shackles of dogmatic societal
thoughts towards sex. One of the dogmas this book shall help you break is
the thinking that sex should always follow the following pattern:
Sexual Dogma
Light kissing with light petting>>deep kissing with deeper, rushed
petting>>sexual intercourse in the missionary or a variant of the
missionary sex position>>fast thrusts in and out leading to fast male
ejaculation>>light kissing and petting as the mood dies down
This, as you may know, is the standard way many of us think of sex. To
have the best sex life possible, you have to alter this thinking and in some
cases, forsake this dogma altogether. Here is why.
Of all the creatures on this earth, man is atop the list of creatures that have
sex for pleasure. While research is still ongoing on whether other animals
have sex for pleasure, we know that we, humans, do. This is very
fundamental in that if we have sex for sexual pleasure, when copulating
using the societal dogma illustrated above does not lead to sexual pleasure
for one of the parties involved, which in most cases is the woman, does that
not mean we are not as evolved as we think we are?
Let us tear apart this dogma and analyze why in most cases, following this
well-laid path rarely leads to sexual pleasure for the woman.
From biology, we know that while a man can feel sexual excitement in one
instant and be ready for intercourse in the next instant, it takes a little bit
more and a little while longer for a woman to feel sexually excited leave
alone reach orgasm.
From this derivation, we also know that using the above dogma, a woman
would feel pressured to orgasm within the shortest time possible because
one of the things this dogmatic thinking does is cause us to look at sex as
something we have to get through fast. Except in very rare cases, this
dogmatic thinking towards sex—the dogged thinking that we should get in
and out, wham bam—never leads to sexual satisfaction for the woman.
This dogmatic sexual thinking is also wrong on another level. From
research, we know that 75% of all women never reach orgasm through
intercourse; a whopping 7 out of every 10 women cannot ‘get there’ simply
from having a man’s penis going in and out of their yoni.
Whether you are a man or a woman, if you continue following the sexual
dogma we illustrated above, it means you will never ‘get your woman
there’ and you, as a woman, will never know the pleasure of orgasm. Enter
oral sex.
Understanding Oral Sex
Oral sex changes the intricacies of the dogma above.
Oral sex, also called oral intercourse, fellatio (in the case of the man being
the recipient), and cunnilingus (in the case of the woman being the
recipient), is where you use your mouth to stimulate your partner’s genitals.
You may be thinking, “If oral sex is the use of the mouth to stimulate sexual
organs, is kissing and biting not oral sex?” No, kissing and biting is not oral
sex unless the kisses and bites are on your lover’s sexual organs.
Oral sex is all-round pleasurable for men and women. If we add oral sex to
the dogma we discussed above, we would then have:
Light kissing with light petting>>deep kissing with deeper, rushed
petting>>oral sex (for as long as you want)>>intercourse (maybe
depending on the satisfaction level of both lovers)
This addition would change the dynamics of sex because for one, oral sex
can act as a prelude to intercourse where, if you are the man, you can use it
to get your partner much closer to orgasm in readiness for the intercourse
that pushes her over the edge. Oral sex can also act as foreplay to prolong
sex and thus sexual pleasure. In addition, oral sex can be an intimate sexual
act all on its own because when you use your mouth to stimulate your
partner’s organs, orgasm is an almost guarantee. This is especially
important in the overall picture of female stimulation and orgasm because if
you, as a man, do it right, you will give your woman a mind blowing
clitoral orgasm.
Further, if you add in other foreplay elements such as vibrators and your
‘fingers’ while still giving her cunnilingus, you are bound to give her an
intense vaginal orgasm especially if you use the vibrator or your fingers to
stimulate her g-spot.
Oral sex is not just for women; men enjoy it just as much, even more so.
Making oral sex an integral part of your sexual routine is going to make
your partner very happy because if you are a woman who has never reached
an orgasm, by engaging in oral sex, you can be sure to get there, and if you
are a man, through oral sex, you can get her there.
To start enjoying oral sex, you need to experiment with some of the best
oral sex positions in the world. Let us discuss some of these:
1: Her Royal Highness

This oral sex position is very exciting for both partners. For her, the
excitement comes from siting on his face (more like straddling his
face/mouth). For him, the excitement comes from the angle in which she
sits thus giving him open access to her vagina. Here is how to execute it:
Man
Lie on your back leisurely and let her straddle your mouth/face. Once she
straddles you and you get the show going, hold on to her hips and use your
tongue to take her to a happy place.”
Woman
Straddle his mouth. Do not sit on his face. Instead, hold yourself up a
couple of inches away from his mouth/face.
2: Leg Up

This oral sex position is just as exciting as the previous one only more so
because it gives the man a dominant role to play. Being in control and
having her in such a vulnerable position will have the man reeling with
desire. For her, the angling of her legs gives him all the access he needs to
take her to places only those experiencing sexual ecstasy know! Here is
how to execute it:
Man
Kneel at edge of a bed and once her yoni is in position in front of you, and
she is lying there open and vulnerable, use your tongue to treat her yoni like
the blossoming flower it is.
Woman
Lie on your back at the edge of a bed. With his face between your thigh,
place your left foot on his shoulders, pull the other one inwards towards
your bosom, and let him give you the sexual satisfaction you desire and
deserve.
3: The Giver

This oral sex position is very erotic because in this position, couples can
easily transition from fellatio for him, cunnilingus for her, and then
intercourse. This continuity will only do one thing: increase sexual pleasure
all-way around. Here is how to execute it:
Woman
Lie comfortably on your back with your upper body a bit elevated in a
comfortable position. You can use a pillow to elevate the upper part of your
body in readiness for him. When he is in position, use your mouth and
tongue to take him to town.
Man
Kneel in front of her with your penis close to her mouth. When she takes
you in her mouth, you can hold on to the headboard or use them to support
her head. Do not thrust; let her do all the ministration: just kneel there and
enjoy the ride.
4: The Corkscrew

This oral sex position is very kinky and can be done anywhere; lift, kitchen,
bathroom etc. Here is how to do it:
Woman
Kneel in front of him. You can place a pillow on the floor to support your
knees. With him standing in front of you with his penis in your clear line of
sight, minister to him that good ‘tongue loving.’ In this oral sex position,
you are free to do more than use your mouth on his penis. You can also lick
his scrotum, reach behind, and use your fingers to stimulate his anus, or
give him a sexy stare as you ‘suck his penis like a valuable lollipop.’
Man
Just stand in front of her, let he do her thing, and enjoy the ride.
5: Oral on the Sofa
When you are so sexually excited and waiting to get to the bedroom is too
long a wait time, you do not have to: you can simply have mutual oral on
the sofa.
Man
Lie on a couch. Place your feet on the headrest and angle your crotch in a
way that ensures your penis angles towards the sofa’s opening and with
your head angling towards the edge of the sofa. When she is in place, start
licking her pussy in the rhythm and intensity she likes most.
Woman
Straddle his body in the sofa with your back towards his face and your face
angled towards his crotch. Once in place, use your mouth, tongue, and
hands to pleasure him.
Oral Sex Tips For Beginners
For oral to infuse the needed excitement into your life, you need to do more
than concentrate on the genitals. You have to set the mood and make sure
before you actually get down to actual exploration of your lover’s genitals,
your partner is ready for you so that when you get down there and let your
mouth and tongue do all the talking, you get your partner there.
To help you with this, here are oral sex tips to get you started:
General
Make sure you are both clean. Before engaging in oral sex, take a shower or
bath and then set the mood.
For him
Unfortunately, even when it comes to cunnilingus, most men are so quick
about it that they want to concentrate on the clitoris and nothing but (choke
it up to the wham bam mentality).
This kind of thinking is not going to lead to immense pleasures for her. In
fact, concentrating on her clit immediately after getting started will not get
her there fast; it will do the opposite: make her feel rushed and pressured to
orgasm.
It is therefore better to, as you begin and even as you guide her deeper into
the realms of ecstasy, avoid placing all your focus on the clitoris: spread the
love. Here is what you should do. Think of her vagina as a mouth you need
to kiss, and then gradually deepen the vaginal kiss as the cloud of emotion
and sexual tension thickens.
Women love it when instead of just focusing on the clit, you also use your
tongue to tease and stimulate her sensitive vagina as a whole. For this,
instead of using the bud of your tongue to concentrate on her clitoris, use
your whole tongue to please the vagina and clit: make it stiff, pointy, flat,
and watch out for her reactions: she will show you what works best for her.
Another thing you should do is start slow: like a tentative kiss that deepens
as emotions deepen.
For Her
Likewise, do not just use your tongue on his most sensitive spot: the head of
the penis. Glide your tongue up and down his shaft, gently kiss and massage
his scrotum, and then teasingly take his penis in your mouth. Use your
mouth to stimulate as huge a portion of the penis as you can and for the
parts you cannot accommodate in your mouth, use your hands.
Do not stop there. Depending on the oral sex position you have adapted,
reach back and massage his ass (some men even like a finger up their anus
as your tongue takes him to town); do what you know works best for him.
Now that you understand oral sex, you are ready to get even deeper into the
tantalizing world of good, enjoyable sex. The next section will teach you
something that will take your sex life to the next level: G-spot stimulation
and squirting.
Section 2– The Fabled G-Spot: Squirting & The
Best-For-G-Spot Stimulation Sex Positions
Through clitoral stimulation, which is what the last section taught you how
to do, when women orgasm, that is it: the clitoris and the vagina become too
sensitive to the touch and further clitoral stimulation will feel weird or
painful for her. This is both good and bad. Good in the fact that she got
there and is now reeling in ecstasy, and bad because now that she has
reached orgasm and her vagina is too sensitive to touch, the sex may just
stop there.
Would you like to have her reeling in repeated ecstasy as you give her
multiple orgasms? If you would like, here is what you need to do: stimulate
her “G-pot” to give her mind-blowing squirting orgasms.
What Is the G-spot and Squirting?
The G-spotor the Gräfenberg spot, so aptly named after Ernest Gräfenberg,
is the erogenous part of a woman’s sexual anatomy that when stimulated,
leads to repeated, deep and powerful orgasm called female ejaculation, what
we call squirting.
Is The G-Spot Real? The Location of the G-Spot
Does the G-spot exist? That is a question many women and men always ask
themselves and each other.
Although researched and studied since the 1940s, the existence of the G-
spot and its location is still a contested topic with some research quarters
showing it does not exist while others vehemently support its existence.
Unlike men whose sexual stimulation always leads to ejaculation, women
are not so lucky and out of every 10 women, only 2 or 3 can ejaculate
through vaginal stimulation. This is because woman’s sexual pleasure
experience is hard to decipher, which is why so many women end up
feeling pressured to squirt only to end up faking it.
In one research review study conducted in 2012, researchers came to the
inconclusive conclusion that there is little anatomical proof to prove the
existence of the G-spot; however, anecdotal evidence show that every
woman has a specific internal area of her vagina that when stimulated, can
see her ejaculate.
For women who constantly experience G-spot ejaculation, the G-spot is the
best discovery in the world and for those who are yet to experience
ejaculatory orgasm through G-spot stimulation, the only thing they are yet
to do is find their G-Spot and stimulate it to experience ejaculation.
Female ejaculation, what we call squirting, gives a woman out-of-this world
sexual experiences through G-spot stimulation. Where is the G-spot located
and what should you do to stimulate it? Many consider the G-spot an
inward extension of the clitoris and a functional female organ.
Located about 5-8 cm or 2-3 inches on the upper part of the vaginal wall
between the vagina’s opening and the urethra, the G-spot, albeit fabled, and
many women go all their life without finding it, when stimulated, will give
a woman multiple and deep vaginal orgasms that rock her body.
To stimulate the G-spot and give your partner multiple ejaculatory orgasms,
insert the middle finger and the index finger into her vagina about 2-3
inches (up to the knuckles), then press up towards the general vicinity of the
clitoris and pubic bone, feel for a spongy area, and when you do, use come-
hither motions to stimulate it. You need not be too gentle: Be firm yet
gentle. Start slow and increase the pace and firmness of the motion as she
gets closer to ejaculation
Obviously, you have to make sure your hands are clean and well trimmed,
and your partner is fully aroused through adequate foreplay where you kiss
her lips, breast, and even give her oral sex for several minutes before you
decide to place your fingers in her.
You may be wondering, “why the fingers and not the penis?” That is a good
question. The fingers are ideal because the G-spot is a hidden spot tucked
away under tissues that swell after stimulation. When she is very horny, the
G-spot will be easier to find and stimulate. Even when she is horny and wet,
you should also use some lubricant to add a level of comfort for when you
put your fingers in her.
Every woman is capable of experiencing ejaculation and although the
fingers are the best way to stimulate the G-spot, some sex positions allow
for the direct penile stimulation of the G-spot.
How to Ejaculate Through G-Spot Stimulation: A Guide for
Women and their Partners’
As we have said, every woman, even those who are yet to experience it, are
capable of ejaculation, all they have to do is learn how to find their G-spot
(which we have already learnt how to do) and then experiment with
different styles of stimulation to find which one works best.
Obviously, to learn how to ejaculate, the first thing you have to do is find
your G-spot, which we have already done. In relation to this, it is important
to mention that experimentation is key. As partners, you have to experiment
with touching each other in different ways as you communicate about what
feels good.
As a woman, you have to experiment with finding your G-spot on your
own. You can do this by lying on your back and because your fingers are
smaller, raise your feet towards your chest to make it easier to find the G-
spot, which as you know, is a ribbed area about 3-5 cm on the front part of
the vaginal wall. Alternatively, some researchers have indicated that it is
possible to see your G-spot if you squat or sit in front of a mirror, spread
your labia lips, then push out your vaginal muscles, and then look for the
ribbed area.
However, and this is very important, if you do not find the G-spot but
instead, find the ribbed area (or not) do not feel pressured or abnormal.
Research says whether you have found your G-spot or not, you are neither
superior nor abnormal.
Once you find the G-spot, the next step is to experiment with different
levels of its sensitivity and more importantly, find the confidence to release
the ejaculate fluid building inside you.
One reason that keeps most women from ejaculating is the fact that during
sex, most women are so self-conscious that when stimulation of the G-spot
leads to the buildup of ejaculatory fluid and the sensation of ejaculation,
because the female body expels the ejaculatory fluid through the urethra,
most women tend to think they want to pee.
A woman’s ejaculatory fluid is not pee. Unfortunately, according to
anecdotal evidence, 60% of women who by clenching their pelvic floor
muscles, think they are holding back pee, are actually holding back
ejaculate.
As a woman who wants to experience full body orgasms, you have to break
away from the dogma of “you should be clean. Women do not ejaculate and
when they do, that is nothing but expelled pee.” This sort of thinking is very
dangerous to your sexual pleasure, so much so that this one reason keeps so
many women from squirting. You must break away from this dogma.
To help you do that, here is something very illuminating. After tons of
research, researchers have discovered that the chemical makeup of men’s
ejaculate is similar to that of a woman ejaculate with the only difference
being the former lacks semen. Although expelled through the urethra,
female ejaculate does not smell or taste anything like urine and unlike urine,
female ejaculation will not leave stains on your bed sheets.
Now that we have looked at how to stimulate the G-spot using your or your
partner’s fingers/a toy, you may be wondering, “what about intercourse? Is
it possible to stimulate the G-spot through penetration?” The answer is yes.
Some sex styles angle the body in a way that allows the man’s penis to
stimulate the G-spot as it goes in and out of the vagina. Let us discuss some
of these sex styles.
Best Sex Styles for G-Spot Stimulation
The following sex styles will lead to G-spot stimulation and eventual
squirting.
1: Open Sesame

This sex position is very relaxing for the woman and very erotic for the man
since he is in control. The angling of the body also ensures that as the penis
moves in and out, it stimulates the G-spot.
Woman
Lie on your left side and lift up your left foot.
Man
Kneel with your knees straddling her right leg. Penetrate her and then wrap
her raised left leg around your waist. Angle your penis in a way that ensures
it brushes against the pelvic floor muscles and then create a gentle in and
out rhythm. On the out thrust, do not pull your penis all the way out, leave
2-3 inches in as you thrust in again. This will ensure continued stimulation
of the G-spot all through the session.
2: Hit the Spot
This sex position is an out of this world sex position guaranteed to hit her
G-spot with every thrust. The angling of the woman’s body ensures his
penis hits the G-spot without him having to do much other than measure his
thrusts.
Woman
Lie on your stomach, swivel your hips sideways, and then spread your
buttocks and legs.
Man
Kneel behind her with her right foot between your knees. Penetrate her and
as she swivels her left leg, use your upper thigh to support it. Kneel forward
with arms on either side of her and start a steady rocking rhythm.
3: Pop the Trunk

This sex style is a variant of the doggy style. Because of the angling of the
vagina, it stimulates the G-spot in unimaginable ways that will leave her
experiencing orgasm after orgasm.
Woman
Lie on your stomach with your legs straight and together. Angle your
buttocks and then raise your hips higher. For comfort, you can place a firm
but fluffy pillow underneath your pelvic bone area
Man
Approach her from behind as you would when claiming her in doggy style.
Penetrate her then lean forward and use your arms to support your upper
body. Rather than thrust in an out rapidly, vary your thrust. Move your penis
about 2-3 inches inside her in shallow thrusts before fully penetrating her
and then repeating the small jabs of shallow thrust coupled with several
deep thrust. Since you are in control, create a thrust rhythm you both enjoy
and that ensures maximum G-spot stimulation.
4: Let’s Ride

This sex position will take the both of you on an ecstatic ride to orgasm. A
variant of the cowgirl sex position, because of the arch in the woman’s
lower back, the angle of penetration allows the penis to hit the woman’s G-
spot repeated times. Because the woman is in charge, she can vary the
deepness, angle, and speed of the thrust to ensure she stimulates her G-spot
in every imaginable way.
Woman
With your man lying on his back, straddle his torso and once you have him
inside you, bend back and hold on to his thigh as you create a rhythm that
supports G-spot stimulation.
Man
Lie on your back comfortably with your legs together. You can use a pillow
to elevate your upper body. Once she straddles you and takes your penis
into her vagina, do not lie there. Massage her breasts and clitoris (since it is
open to touch because she is leaning back), and even grab her butt. To
stimulate her clit, you can use a vibrator.
5: I want Control
Also called the girl on top, this sex position is super great because not only
is it great for G-spot stimulation, the closeness of the bodies also makes
clitoral stimulation possible. Because the woman is in control, she can vary
the angle of penetration thus giving her better control over her orgasm.
Man
Lie on your back with your feet together.
Woman
Straddle him as you would in the cowgirl position. However, instead of
sitting straight with your knees close to his torso, stretch your feet along his,
and lie on him using your hands for support as you rock and roll your hips
to find an angle that sees your clitoris grinding on his pelvic bone and his
penis stimulating your G-spot. This is bound to give you immense pleasure.

Now that we have looked at how to get started with oral, and have looked at
how to take your sex life to the next level through G-spot stimulation and
squirting, you are ready to take your sex life a notch higher by adding some
kink to your sex life. The next section shall teach you how to do this:
Section 3–Adding Some Kink To Your Sex Life:
BDSM + 2 Great Dominant Sex Positions
Every couple on the universe wants to have a great sex life that never feels
boring. This is why most couples are willing to go the extra mile, to
massage each other, give each other oral, and even try some diverse sex
positions.
If you are looking to add some kinky excitement to your sex life, try
BDSM. What is BDSM?
Kink Sex for Beginners: Understanding BDSM

BDSM, or bondage and discipline/dominance, & submission/sado-

masochism encompasses a variety of sexual practices that involve sexual
fantasy, role playing, bondage, submission, dominance, sadomasochism,
and wide variety of erotic sexual practices couples interested in kinky sex
engage in.
While the initial meaning of BDSM was B/D (bondage and Discipline) D/s
(Dominance and submission) and S/M (sadism and masochism), today,
BDSM is a catch phrase that encompasses a wide range of activities and has
a distinct subculture.
In its most basic form, BDSM is the mindset of relinquishing sexual control
to someone dominating while you engage in erotic sexual acts most would
not consider the ‘normal’ every day way to have sex. If you have watched
50 Shades of Grey, you have a fair understanding of the kind of sexual
activities we are talking about here.
In its traditional sense, BDSM means one of the partners is submissive
(submissive masochist or the slave who receives pain—this can be the man
or the woman) and the other partner is the master (the sadist master) and the
one dolling out the pain depending on what feels good.
To make BDSM part of your sex routine, you and your partner need to
communicate openly because you cannot simply decide to add something
such as tying her hands to the bed post, blind folding her, and then spanking
her without communicating your sexual fantasies and intent and
establishing a safe word for when things get too kinky or painful.
If after communicating, you and your partner decide you are ready to take
your sex life to the next level through BDSM, here is what you need to do:
A Beginners Guide to Kinky Sex: A Systematic
Way to Make BDSM Work for You
Most couples have sexual fantasies they want to explore but are too afraid
to act out. This is very sad. To infuse various aspects of BDSM into your
sex life, you need to engage your partner, openly discuss these matters and
decide how far is too far, and how fast is too fast because gravitating
towards the too far and the too fast will lead to a bad sexual experience or
even pain.
However, the caution of pain should not be enough to deter you if you are
willing to communicate openly and only practice BDSM for pleasure and
not pain (unless the pain is controllably pleasurable).
Now that you have communicated:
Step 1: Explore and Name Your Desires and Fantasies
BDSM is all about turning sexual fantasies and desires into reality. To add
some kink to your sex life, openly communicate your sexual desires and
fantasies and go a step further: discuss how you can actualize these
fantasies in a safe way that ensures all involved enjoy themselves.
Be aware than when you are fantasizing, anything goes: there are no
limitations or consequences. However, when you are acting out the fantasy,
you have to be aware of your partner’s limitations especially if you are the
master (which is why you need to communicate openly) and make sure you
do not go above what your partner can handle and considers pleasurable.
Step 2: Clarify the Kind of Eroticism You Want to Explore
We have established that BDSM encapsulates many things. Because of this,
you have to clarify the kind of erotic energy you want to explore depending
on the erotic desires and fantasies you want to explore and fulfil.
Erotic energy is the intent and motivation behind the sexual fantasy or
desire you want to explore. For instance, a nibble on the lips can be soft or
rough depending on the erotic energy fueling it.
Because BDSM will have you exploring things such as bondage, spankings,
and light pulls and bites here and there, it is very important that as you start
your explorative journey, you clarify, through communicating with your
partner, the kind of erotic energy you want to experience and explore.
Do you want the spanking to be soft and tender or is rough and painful your
cup of tea? Do you want the nibbles to be strong enough to leave teeth
marks or do you want them petal soft and measured? Ask yourself these and
other related questions until you determine the kind of erotic energy you
want to infuse into your sex life. Specificity will allow you to settle into
your sex routine and allow you to know what your partner wants and
desires.
Step 3: Explore Each Other’s Sexual Fantasies and Desires
BDSM is more than the master being in control and determining everything
he or she will do to the slave; this sort of approach may work in porn but in
real life, that sort of approach will never lead to all-round sexual
satisfaction.
Before you start experimenting with BDSM, engage in sexual conversations
that act like foreplay where you talk about what you want to experience as a
couple. Be very open, honest, and detailed with your questions and replies.
Do not leave anything to chance because if your partner wants you to spank
her roughly enough to leave marks on her buttocks or face, and you fail to
do that, you will be failing to fulfil her sexual fantasy.
Here, aim to discuss the kind of sensations you want to experience and the
kinds of thing you want your partner to do and not do. Be very succinct.
Step 4: Take It One Step A Time
Once you start BDSM exploration, you may get over excited and want to
explore many things at once. Avoid this. Because you are completely new
to BDSM, take it one adventure at a time or infuse one BDSM element into
your sex life at a time. Do not go all out! When you experiment too fast,
you will be at odds to determine what works and does not work for you.
For instance, instead of batching together, erotic spanking, bondage, orgasm
control, and verbal discipline, start with erotic spanking, experiment with it
until you find what works for you. After adding spanking, you can then add
bondage and after experimenting with it individually, you can then infuse
other element in your BDSM escapades. The idea here is to try each thing
individually because everything you add adds a new exciting layer to your
sex life.
Step 5: Establish Clear Boundaries
BDSM is all about safe commandership. If you want your partner to spank
or gag you but fail to state in unequivocal terms how much is too far, your
partner may cross the mark and you will have no one to blame but yourself.
When you establish boundaries, what you are doing is giving each other
clear instructions; this makes it easier for you and your partner to relax and
since you know what to expect as well as the level at which to expect it,
there will be no painful surprises and the anticipation will be sexual instead
of tensive.
For example, if you have decided to experiment with bondage, establish
how tight you want the bonds to be, the positioning of the bonds, as well as
other factors such as the position you shall hold once bound, how you want
your partner to stimulate you, etc. This is very important.
Once you set boundaries, stick to them, and if you have to change them, do
so through a conversation held before you start your chosen BDSM
adventure. Never change boundaries or rules as you are experimenting.
Remember that the whole idea behind BDSM is mutual trust between the
slave and the master. That trust is central to making the experience great.
Step 6: Slow and Steady Wins the Race
Even though BDSM is out there, you still need to pay heed to the rules of
foreplay and sexual intercourse. You may tempt to moving fast and
experiencing heavy sensations from the go. Again, this may work in porn
but in a real life setting, it will prove difficult to implement.
When you take it slow, you build up gradual sexual energy and at the same
time, reduce chances of injury to the submissive partner. Irrespective of
which BDSM activity you want to experiment with, it is always best to take
things slow in the same way you do not jump into penetration without
adequate foreplay and stimulation. Slow down and pay attention to every
detail of the experience; the gradual erotic energy buildup will be well
worth the wait.
To learn a bit more about the various kinds of BDSM activities you can
engage in, navigate to the link.
Kinky Sex Positions for the Dominant Partner
Having understood what BDSM is as well as how to use it to create a kinky
sex life, let us discuss sex positions well suited to the dominant
male/partner.
1: Wall Bound

When the sexual energy from BDSM foreplay is too much and you are
nowhere near a bed, the wall will do just fine. This sex kinky sex style is
very exotic for the man who wants to take control and oddly exciting for the
woman who craves domination while held up against a bedroom wall or
such.
Man
When all the kissing, petting, and spanking gets her so riled up that she
can’t wait to get to the bed, just pick her up, pin her against the wall (do not
press her to hard) wrap her legs around your torso for support (you can even
use your hands to support her legs and buttock), and then claim her.
Woman
When he hoists you up in the air and claims you, because having you in his
arms can be tiresome, lean back to counter balance the weight.
2: The Rocking Horse
The rocking horse is relatively easy to do. It is also an intimate sex position
that places you face to face and because the woman is in control with the
man sited upright and his legs crossed in the lotus pose, movement will be
easier.
Man
Sit in the lotus pose and lean back while using your hands to support your
leaned back upper body.
Woman
Straddle him as he holds the lotus position and welcome him ‘home.’ When
you start rocking in the rhythm you like, you are free to run your hands all
over his chest and back or simply lean back to give him a better view of
your body as sexual pleasure gradually increases for the both of you
Conclusion
We have come to the end of the book. Thank you for reading and
congratulations for reading until the end.
I hope you have learnt a lot from the book.
As you have discovered, your sex life does not have to be boring. If you
apply everything we have learnt in this guide, you will have a great sex life
that will have your partner excited about the very thought of sex.
If you found the book valuable, can you recommend it to others? One way
to do that is to post a review on Amazon.

Click here to leave a review for this book on Amazon!

Thank you and good luck!