Once it’s Out, it’s Out.

The process of Interpersonal Communication is irreversible, you can wish

you hadn’t said something and you can apologise for something you said
and later regret - but you can’t take it back.

Start all interpersonal communication with an open mind; listen to what is being said
rather than hearing what you expect to hear. You are then less likely to be
misunderstood or say things that you regret later.

Research shows that we generally only listen with about 25%

efficiency. This means that about three-quarters of spoken
communication is lost on the average person. Instead of giving the
speaker our full attention, we may be formulating a reply, or
making a judgement about what they are saying, or even being
distracted by what we’re going to have for dinner. This ineffective
listening leads to misunderstandings and a breakdown in
communication.

Effective communication in the workplace is crucial for fostering a positive and productive
environment. Here are some key aspects and strategies for improving communication:

1. **Clear and Concise Messaging**: Messages should be articulated in a straightforward manner,

avoiding jargon or ambiguous language. This helps prevent misunderstandings and ensures that
everyone is on the same page.

2. **Active Listening**: Encourage active listening among team members. This means paying full
attention to what others are saying, asking clarifying questions, and paraphrasing to confirm
understanding.

3. **Openness and Transparency**: Foster an environment where employees feel comfortable

expressing their thoughts, concerns, and ideas openly. Transparency in communication builds trust
and encourages collaboration.
4. **Feedback Mechanisms**: Establish regular feedback loops where employees can provide input
on projects, processes, and team dynamics. Constructive feedback should be specific, timely, and
aimed at improving performance.

5. **Choose the Right Communication Channels**: Utilize various communication channels (e.g.,
email, meetings, instant messaging, etc.) appropriately based on the nature and urgency of the
message. Avoid overloading any single channel and be mindful of individuals' preferred
communication styles.

6. **Clarity in Roles and Responsibilities**: Ensure that everyone understands their roles and
responsibilities within the team or organization. This helps minimize confusion and promotes
accountability.

7. **Cultural Sensitivity**: In diverse workplaces, be mindful of cultural differences in

communication styles and norms. Respect and adapt to these differences to avoid
misunderstandings or misinterpretations.

8. **Emotional Intelligence**: Develop emotional intelligence skills to understand and manage

emotions effectively, both in oneself and in others. This fosters empathy and enhances interpersonal
communication.

9. **Conflict Resolution Skills**: Equip team members with the skills necessary to address conflicts
constructively. Encourage open dialogue, active listening, and a focus on finding mutually beneficial
solutions.

10. **Regular Updates and Information Sharing**: Keep employees informed about relevant
updates, changes, and developments within the organization. This can be done through regular
meetings, newsletters, or other communication channels.

11. **Lead by Example**: Leaders should model effective communication behaviors. By

demonstrating active listening, transparency, and openness, they set the tone for healthy
communication within the workplace.

12. **Training and Development**: Provide training opportunities to enhance communication skills
across the organization. This could include workshops on active listening, conflict resolution, or
intercultural communication.
By focusing on these aspects and implementing effective communication strategies, workplaces can
cultivate a culture of clear, respectful, and productive communication.

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Common Mistakes in Communication

There are many ways to make mistakes when communicating. This is not a
complete list. However, it includes many of the most common mistakes in
common situations.

1. Taking a one-size-fits-all approach

It is tempting to think that you’ve ‘got’ communication skills. You know how to
listen, you know how to speak effectively. What could go wrong?

The answer is that communication is a two-way process.

In other words, there is no one size fits all. You need to change how you
communicate to fit the person or group in front of you—and when
communicating with a group, you may need to consider several different
approaches to get your message across to everyone.

2. Letting your emotions take control

Communication is, of course, partly emotional—and communicating your
emotions is important.

However, it is equally important to ensure that you don’t allow your

emotions to take control of your communication.

In other words, don’t simply react emotionally to what you are hearing. Take a
moment to reflect and respond thoughtfully, as well as emotionally. This is
particularly important when your main emotion in the moment is anger. Words
spoken in anger are seldom forgotten, even if forgiven.

There is more about this in our pages on Anger and Anger Management.

3. Failing to pay attention to tone

There are two aspects to this.
First, the actual tone of your voice. Your non-verbal communication, which
includes your voice itself, can give away a great deal of information about your
feelings. For example, a sharp tone often betrays impatience, and can sound
very dismissive.

You can avoid this by simply taking a deep breath before speaking, to give
yourself time to respond more reflectively.

Second, we may well hear someone described as ‘tone deaf’. This has a specific
meaning in music. In more general communication, however, it means that they
say the wrong thing at the wrong time, or in the wrong way. This can be both in
writing, and in speech, or even in text messaging.

There is a useful rule here. If you are ever tempted to preface what you are
saying with, “Well, anyway…”, it may be inappropriate.

Just stop a moment, and consider whether you would like to hear what you are
going say, right now. Then just don’t say it.

4. Avoiding difficult conversations

Nobody likes having difficult conversations. Nobody wants to tell anyone that
they have been made redundant, or that their performance is inadequate, or
that their personal hygiene needs attention.

However, it is almost always best to have these conversations—and that

does mean conversations, not telling someone by email or text.

Nothing like this is ever improved by being left for longer, or not communicated
face-to-face.

There is more about how to handle difficult conversations in our page

on Communication in Difficult Situations.

5. Not being prepared to speak up about your own

wants and needs
It is important to be respectful of the needs of others. However, it is also
important to be prepared to speak up about what you want and need.
If you don’t do this, nobody will know about your needs, and will find them very
difficult to respect.

This may mean learning to be more assertive, and there is more about how to
do this in our pages on Assertiveness.

6. Not having an open mind

Unfortunately, it is all too easy to close your mind to others.

The so-called ‘echo chamber’ effect of social media means that we tend to hear
our own views amplified and echoed back to us. This also tends to happen
within groups of friends—because those with very different views tend to go
elsewhere.

However, it is important to open your mind to diversity. Everyone is different—

and diversity strengthens both teams and workplaces. It also enriches
everyone’s life.

Variety is the very spice of life, that gives it all its flavour

William Cowper, The Task

There is more about the importance of diversity in our page on Diversity in Teams
and Groups.

7. Speaking more than you listen

It is worth saying again: communication is a two-way process.

Especially as people become more senior in organisations—or even just older—

they tend to assume, often unconsciously, that their opinions, and the
information they wish to impart, are more important.

They forget that other people also have important information to communicate.

It is always wise to listen more than you speak.

There is more about improving how you listen in our pages on Listening Skills.

8. Not checking that you have been understood

It is essential to check back with your listener(s) to ensure that your message has
been understood.

Once again: communication is a two-way process.

If your message is not heard and understood, it will not be acted upon.

Take time to check that your audience has understood. Encourage them to use
techniques like clarification and checking to demonstrate that understanding.
Above all, be open to questions, and consider giving your answer in different
terms from your original message.

9. Failing to check that you have understood

The other side of the coin is that it is vital to check that you have correctly
understood other people’s meaning.

Techniques like reflection enable you to show the speaker what you have
heard, including any emotional undertones. Effective questioning can uncover
any hidden areas of potential misunderstanding, and is an important way to
clarify your understanding.

Mastering these skills will help ensure that you do your part to avoid any
misunderstandings.

10. Interrupting other people

We have almost certainly all done it—but interrupting someone else is
both rude and dismissive.

It tells other people that you value your opinion or words more highly than
theirs. Alternatively, they may hear that you already believe you know what they
are going to say—which is usually wrong.

There are, of course, people who seem to think that they have the right to speak
endlessly, without letting you get a word in. In this case, it is reasonable to wait
until they draw breath, and then jump in. This is especially true if you
are chairing a meeting in which this is happening—and then it is worth
highlighting that they have taken a lot of ‘air-time’.

However, we are not really talking about this here, but simply interrupting and
talking over people before they have had a chance to make their point. In this
case, just don’t.
https://professional.dce.harvard.edu/blog/8-ways-you-can-improve-your-communication-skills/

Be clear and concise

Prepare ahead of time
Be mindful of nonverbal communication
Watch your tone
Practice active listening
Build your emotional intelligence
Develop a workplace communication strategy
Create a positive organizational culture
https://www.coursera.org/articles/communication-skills
Ask questions and summarize the other person's main points.
Be concise and specific.
Put away distractions.
Be respectful.
Be receptive to feedback.