Affirmations (meaning a statement said with confidence about a perceived truth) have helped

thousands of people make significant changes in their lives. But they don't always work for
everyone. Why can one person have great success using this tool while another see's no
results at all?

Affirmations are more than just phrases meant to build our self esteem and positive inner
confidence. When used right, they can reshape your life, give you peace or recharge a
stagnant goal or dream. Within the context of submission, affirmations are a useful tool to
achieving the dream of being the best submissive you can be with the tools at hand.

When a submissive, like yourself, uses affirmations in everyday interaction and personal
development you see better results, which can be something as simple as a more positive
outlook on life to an improved body image or even reaching difficult goals by breaking down
walls. Let's learn how to write affirmations that will follow you through your personal
exploration and help you reach your peak.
Getting Started

You can write effective submissive affirmations fairly easily when you know how. Find a quiet
place where you can be alone and can focus on writing statements that will improve your
self-esteem. You may not want to just focus on your submission, but whatever aspects of
your life where you wish to improve your personal confidence.

Keep the following in mind:

Choose one negative thought you have about yourself and write down the positive
opposite that counteracts that belief. For example, you may often think, “I am a
terrible submissive.” In this case, you would write an affirmation like, “I am an
energized and capable submissive.”

Make your submissive affirmations short so they’re easier for you to remember. Even
statements as short as four or five words can be powerful.

Start your affirmations with “I” or “My.” Because you’re making a statement about
yourself, it’s most effective if it starts with you. “I choose to be positive” is much better
than “Positive thoughts are coming into my mind.”

Write your personal affirmations in the present tense. Write as though you’re
experiencing what you desire right now, not in the future. For example, “I see my own
worth and value” is superior to “I will easily see my own worth and value.” It’s also
better not to put a time frame on your affirmation such as a certain date or “within
three months,” because doing so limits when what you desire can happen.

Don’t begin your affirmations with “I want” or “I need.” You don’t want to affirm that
you’re wanting and needing something. Rather, write your affirmations as an
expression of being grateful for already having and being what you want. If you feel
 that your statement should be a want or need, then perhaps you need to address the
lack thereof in your relationship.

Make sure all your affirmations are positive statements. If you tell yourself you are
discarding negative behavior and thoughts, your focus will be on those rather than on
what you want to do and be. Don’t include words like “don’t,” “won’t,” “am not,”
“can’t,” “not,” “doesn’t,” or “am stopping.” Instead of “I’m eliminating my miserable
thoughts,” create an affirmation such as, “I’m happy being who I am.”

Add emotion to your affirmations by inserting, “I am [emotion] about . . .” or “I feel

Create affirmations that will work. If you don’t believe your statement, you’ll take timid
actions and be hesitant, sure that you won’t be able to succeed. If you write an
affirmation that is truly difficult for you to believe, write another one that starts with, “I
am open to . . .” or “I am willing to believe I could . . .”

You can also create an affirmation that is close enough to your current situation to be
realistic and achievable, such as, “I am speaking up one or two times at future
meetings I attend.”

How to Make it Powerful

Speak the affirmation out loud for about five minutes three times a day - morning, mid day
and evening. An ideal time to do this is when you're putting your make up or shaving so that
you can look at yourself in the mirror as you repeat the positive statement. Another option
that helps to reinforce the new belief and would be easy to do at work is to write out the
affirmation several times in a notebook. Notice over time as you write it if your style of
writing changes. This could be a clue as to how your mind perceives the new concept. I call
this exercise using the mindfulness journal to forward the agenda of the positive affirmation.
Anchor the affirmation in your body as you are repeating it by placing your hand on the area
that felt uncomfortable when you wrote out the negative belief in Step One. Also "breathe"
into the affirmation while you are saying or writing it. As you reprogram your mind you want
to move from the concept of the affirmation to a real, positive embodiment of the quality you
seek.

Get a friend or coach to repeat your affirmation to you. As they are saying for example, "You
are remarkable and cherished" identify this statement as 'good mothering' or 'good fathering'
messages. If you don't have someone who you feel comfortable asking then use your
reflection in the mirror as the person who is reinforcing the healthy message.

Affirmations can be a powerful tool to help you change your mood, state of mind, and
manifest the change you desire in your life. But they work best if you can first identify the
unwholesome belief that is opposing them. If these suggestions are still not helping then I
recommend seeing a professional therapist to help you uncover what is buried deep in your
unconscious and/or start a mindfulness meditation practice. Mindfulness meditation is a very
effective method to help you uncover your unconscious thought patterns and allows you to
categorize them identifying what is wholesome, negative and afflicted. Mindfulness is not
about change rather it's about the power and ability to accept first what is then to transmute
towards what is possible. Try it and see how your life can improve!

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