Tristan Davis

Reflection

Beginning in the spring of 2017 I didn’t know the first thing about performing. I had

never even been in a show so making the leap from computer science to theater performance was

a huge one and one that made me feel extremely silly the very first day when in Chuck’s 112a

class we went around in a circle and shared our majors. How could I with any confidence tell

people that I was a theater student when I’d never even acted before? Honestly, I shouldn’t have

even been able to go into the program, at the very least I should have had to audition. I felt

incredibly self conscious but with time I began to become a bit more sure of myself. My dance

class taught me that I actually could move and feedback from others really helped me gain

confidence. The intro acting class let me do scene work for the first time and get up in front of

the class to deliver my first monologue. These two classes were huge for me, they were my first

foray into the arts. I thought I could kind of sing before joining the program and I had only been

on a stage a handful of times and even though by the end of the semester I had far from parted

completely with my insecurities I atleast felt slightly less awkward and embarrassed when

someone asked me if I was an actor.

It was really the summer showbiz shows that made me finally feel like I could be

considered an actor. Working was a fantastic experience to get my feet wet without having a ton

of work and responsibility. The blocking was minimal as well as the dancing, and as far as lines I

really only had one monologue to be responsible for. I learned a lot during this show, including

how a show actually works. I got to see the moving parts, actually work with other people to put

on a show, not only that it was with people of all ages. Following right after that I went into The
Addams Family where I was cast as Lucas. What a dream that was. I had loved this musical since

I heard a number from the show way back in highschool, during the days where I only dreamed I

could have the courage to get up on stage or to even show my face at an audition. This really was

the perfect opportunity for me, it was like a true level up. I got to do some scene work in a

production, something I hadn’t really been able to do in Working. I had gotten solos to sing and

was considered part of the principal cast. After the set was struck I still had a long ways to go but

I had felt that I had grown so much even just during that one summer, I had even gotten a role in

Stray Dog’s production of Spring Awakening, I may have even started to get a little bit of a big

head admittedly.

This is the period in which I forget exactly which classes I took in what order but there

are definitely classes that stand out to me significantly. Directing class is one of these classes and

one that I reflect back on more often that I think I would have thought before having taken it. I

felt like this class gave me some authority when talking about scripts and I looked at stories more

analytically. For the first time I really tried to break down a story, gut it, and analyze it and it’s

construction. I know that I have always had a sensitivity to stories and a deep appreciation for the

art of storytelling but it was here that I got to really consider what it was that made these stories

tick and learn how people can show that on a stage (or the limitless other places you can put on a

show). I loved the discussions we would have in there and I still refer back sometimes to the

work that we did, such as the analysis of the play FUN.

I’m going to take a quick detour from talking about classes to mention X-fest. I

remember how insane I thought it was that an entire week of classes would be canceled so we

could go do workshops with visiting artists, and yeah it was insane but that is what is so great
about it. It was incredibly exciting and nerve wracking to go into the VC and start working in a

usually extremely personal/intimate way (which is usually the case considering what we do) with

complete strangers, at least they were to me. X-fest really got to just let loose and break free,

because I felt like I wanted to get the most I possibly could out of the time we got to share with

the instructors and there was so little time to try and make an impression. I remember one or two

of the most face reddening embarrassing moments of my entire acting career happened during

the bouffon workshop, but in those moments I feel as though I learned a lot about myself and

also being okay with making choices and having the not necessarily work out.

I really enjoyed the variety of classes that I got to take. Lighting, dance, playwriting,

dialects, period styles, experimental, and many more. Within all of these classes I felt like I had

the opportunity to grow in different ways and I know there is at the very least atleast one thing

from each class I have taken that I can apply to my work after I leave the university. Another

opportunity to grow was the 199’s (Which I will actually still have to complete one next semester

I believe but that is OK because I will be here anyways finishing up!) Even though sometimes

I’d be feeling not so willing to do one, I am grateful that they were required because I got so

much insight on the process from working backstage. I think that everyone who acts should have

to pay their dues and work for the production in some other capacity. It was also really fun to be

on headset and find out how much BS the crew talks during the run (I’m sure one day I’ll be on

stage and in the back of my mind be wondering what they are saying about me over the mics) I

think if I had to pick a favorite it was doing mics for Drowsy. That was how I met a lot of the

people in the program since I was new and I get to talk one on one with everyone at least for a bit

everyday (And you only work at the beginning and at the very end!)
 While I’m on the topic of classes I have to shout out probably my favorite class that I’ve

taken, that being Experimental. I felt as though in that class I was really tuning my “instrument”

(hopefully that doesn’t sound too hippy dippy, wait, who am I kidding I’m talking to a bunch of

theater people. Pretty sure we used a lot more “out there” analogies in Voice and Movement, so

I’ll carry on!) but as I was saying, in experimental, practicing viewpoints and suzuki really

proved to be great tools. It made me think about theater in a different way as well as the creation

of it. Those days when you really felt like you had achieved this sort of hive mind with everyone

and then we would come together and move and make tableaus and just create things that I

otherwise would have never even thought to create. I suppose that is what made it pretty special

for me because I am usually such an overly critical and perfectionist thinker and sometimes that

can be crippling when trying to devise theater. But using our techniques we got so much rich

material that we could use for any variety of projects, and some we did in AreUR? I don’t think

I’ll ever forget the intensity of Suzuki either, or that amazing guitar song we used for soaring, or

the pressure when we were told absolutely not to laugh no matter what… Otsukaresama deshita.

I think that sometimes the classes could have been harder to skate by in. I totally get it

that this is a smaller program and what we are doing is not science or math and for that reason it

is a whole different ball game as far as grading. But there were times when I felt like I could do

ANYTHING and I would at least get a B or at worst a C and I know I am not the only one who

thinks this. I would see on occasion some of my classmates come into class completely

unprepared, once not even being able to get through the beginning of the scene without everyone

feeding them the lines. I consider myself a pretty hard working student, and in MOST cases I

think I was pretty well prepared for things but even for myself there were times when I got way
better scores on a project, test, or performance than I should have gotten, so I am not completely

innocent either. I hope I am not coming off as a complete jerk but I felt sometimes that anyone

who could speak english could get through the program, but to be honest I feel like education is

what you make of it so it doesn't affect me at all what other people are doing. I would have liked

to have more opportunities to get up and do stuff too. A lot of the time I think the students would

be lazy and the instructors would think that the students would come unprepared if they weren’t

given enough time to memorize a piece but I think if we can do the 24 hour play festival with

success how does it take everybody a month to memorize a scene? That was another reason I

really like Experimental, we DID stuff everyday. I know not every class is a performance class

but there were a lot more opportunities I feel like to get up and do. I know the students moan and

groan about it but I think in the end they thank you for it and are grateful for the opportunity to

perform even if it makes them feel nervous.

I really liked having the guest artists come in in auditions class. Deb kind of brought me

down to earth and I realized that I am probably going to be auditioning for these one line roles

for a while and that there is a lot you can actually do with that one line. I LOVED how brutal she

was. That is what I NEED! I am usually super unsatisfied if I am not given a way to improve, or

the times at the end of rehearsal when you don’t get a note. I want someone to put me on the spot

and hold me accountable if I do something wrong, stupid, or unmotivated. She made me feel like

I HAD to be prepared or she was going to roast me in front of the whole class, super beneficial. I

liked Michael James Reed’s workshop too because I had absolutely no clue how to do a self

taped audition and that is something EVERYONE must know how to do by the time they

graduate. It was so simple but when we watched our first batch of videos you could see just how
clueless almost all of us were. He, again, told it like it is and pointed out if something was off or

weird, it was also really weird seeing him stand next to Chuck because they look like they

actually might be brothers.

Period Styles is another class that really stands out to me as one where I learned a lot. I

really wish I could have taken this class before we did Tartuffe, but it was nice to get to return to

that style of acting. The day where we all took turns coming in to different kinds of music and

had to make an entrance, do poses, use our clothing, and make an exit was one of the most

memorable days I have had in any of my classes. I learned a lot about the power of pauses and

how much meaning your mannerisms and what you are doing when you aren’t speaking hold.

I’ve always been someone who shied away from playing Shakespeare, I suppose I just felt like I

had no business even trying to attempt it. Recently I’ve been reading more Shakespeare and I

think about a lot of the techniques in class that we covered concerning the language and putting

emphasis on certain words and the ebb and flow of his verse. We had a lot of wonderful exercises

during this class, some that stand out to me was the Henry V speech where we ran out onto the

platform to encourage our troops, insulting one another with words we chose from a collection of

Shakesearian insults, and going through speeches on the chalkboard and picking them apart. That

to me was really beneficial and knowledge that I otherwise could have not have gained just by

simply picking up a book.

Another lesson I want to briefly mention that sort of ties into the “just do it” theme I keep

talking about was the playwriting class that we took. I really enjoyed that class and from it I

wrote three different pretty developed scenes. Since then I have written a grand total of one, and

the class was, what, two years ago? In my defense I have had lots of other things going on but at
the same time I tend to need a deadline in order to deliver or I will just never seem to get it done.

One time during X-fest I bumped into the Cold Hearts at Starbuck (so cool) and they told me the

exact same thing. So I guess I am writing this sort of to myself to remind myself to be more

diligent but also to the faculty to say if you just simply give the students more strict deadlines

and or make them more limited more often than not they will get the work done. We have group

chats outside of class and I have to admit more often than not the students put stuff off work until

the week, or even day before something is due. With the kind of work that we are doing the most

beneficial stuff is the work we are doing on our feet in class, or whatever work that we are

producing. I believe that that is why the mini workshops were so effective too. We were limited

to only four classes a piece with these people so we had harsher deadlines, yet miraculously,

everyone delivered for the most part. This was true in experimental too, the BEST stuff we did I

would argue was the one acts that we would make up in 15 minutes. When Chuck gave us a

week in my opinion those were the worst batch. People work the hardest under time constraints

and I think we could have done a lot more work all around the board if you’ll not hate me for

being so bold as saying so. I am not saying that I think you guys did not do enough, and I know

you don’t want to pile on too much stress or come off as cruel considering how tight knit the

department is, but I am telling you I think the students even if it was in hindsight would be

thankful for all the opportunities they got to be creative and create.

Going through this program taught me a lot of other lessons too outside of technique.

Admittedly there were times where I doubted if I was in the right place or if I had made a

mistake, but here at the end I know it was the right move. I believe that I got an important

education not just in how to stand on a stage and say lines but in being a thoughtful member in
society and a more sensitive and compassionate human being. I think what is lacking in other

disciplines is that others go out into the world but they don’t really know how to communicate

with other people, they can be cold and analytical. Theater is great because you are sharing an

intimate space with other actors, with an audience, the crew. It’s a spiritual experience and I’ve

gotten to learn a lot about myself just from participating in shows and working with other people,

lessons that I can take with me to any job whatever it may be. I would like to thank you all for

the fantastic education that I have been given and the opportunities that I have had to work with

all of you. It has truly been a pleasure and one that I will take with me for the rest of my days.