The Gothic Comics RPG

By James Carpio and Ben Morgan

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bede rogerson (Order #4120245)
 And
Two Guys From Noo Yawk
Proudly Present

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 Game
Mechanics By
James Carpio,
Written By Ben Morgan
James Carpio and
and Rebecca Wigandt
Ben Morgan

Initial
Edited By
Concept By Mary Lindholm
James Carpio and ing
Kirstin Connors
y test s
P la rew
And an
Phil el Bekm
i c ha Berg
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Dav n Brag arus
t h a L a z
Na urst- io
B p
ard Car s
Rich James onnor n II
C o
tin alds
Kirs H. Don os
ert l En
Rob Rache atley
Interior e r G
Tyl Gemm ld
ell
k By
Artwor a n a enfie
arpio, Cover Art By L Gre
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James C an, Dav as Ha ux
B e n M or g Nick Palazzo Luc Hero
f ll
and Jef nis Hu lle
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Nick Pala the g
Mat an Kin g
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M r M iate
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Jen yle Me iner
N n M an
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Aa Morg
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Ben Morga
o e l i g e r
J e Ne
u c g u ez
Br odri uez
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Pau y Rodr ider
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Tim tin Sch aylor
Jus nnan T il
Bre wen Va andt
O ig
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Reb

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 The
SpooktaculaR
Seven
Brian Connors
Kirstin Connors
Special Thanks To Lucas Hardy
Rebecca Wigandt Jay Libby
Aaron Potts
Adam Rineheart
Mark Snyder

© MMXI Chapter 13 Press, Inc. All Lefts Reversed.

v2.0 08/31/2012

Join the discussion at http://www.chapter13press.com/forums/

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 Table of Contents
Foreword 5

Part 1: Introduction 7

Part 2: Playing the Game 11

Part 3: Running The Game 31

Part 4: Stomping Ground 49

Going Out of Business 52
Dave of the Dead 66
The World of Insufficient Light 78
Terror at the Lake! 92
Short Cuts 106

Part 5: Acknowledgements 113

"Nothing is static
Even the Mona Lisa is falling apart.
Maybe self-improvement isn't the answer.

Maybe self-destruction is the answer."

— Chuck Palahniuk

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bede rogerson (Order #4120245)
 MopeyGoth
“First Impressions”
The The
Yearbook Yearbook
Committee Committee
Wants Wants
YOU! YOU!
Go Pachyderms! Go Pachyderms!

The The Well, he’s doing

Yearbook Yearbook better than you did
Committee Committee
on your first day.
Wants Wants
YOU! YOU!
Go Pachyderms! Go Pachyderms!

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 Part 1: Introduction
Q: How do you get a goth out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope.

Willkommen!
Welcome to Spookybeans, the roleplaying game of
gothic underground comics. This game allows
players to explore a morbidly funny comic book
world in the vein of Charles Addams, Tim Burton,
Roman Dirge, Edward Gorey, Ted Naifeh, Jill
Thompson, Serena Valentino, Jhonen Vasquez,
and Voltaire (among others).

Whut's All This

Arr-Pee-Gee
Nonsense?
If you've played a roleplaying game
before, you don't need yet
another rehash of the the whole
“What is Roleplaying?” schpiel. If
you haven't played an RPG
before, but your friends have,
go get someone in your group to
explain it to you. If none of
your friends have played an
RPG before, there's a wealth of
information to be found online.

Okay, maybe we could do with a

little more explanation than that.
You see, this isn’t like most
traditional RPGs (we’re not saying
it’s better, just different), in
which the rules concern
themselves mainly with things like
how far you can move in a turn, or
how many actions you can take in a
round, or how easy or difficult it is

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 to hit someone with a particular weapon, or how much damage that weapon
causes, or whether or not characters can jump across a chasm, or pick a
lock, or convince a temple guard that they’re the entourage of the
Ambassador of The Dragonlands instead of a band of drunken wandering
swords for hire, and the like.

On the other hand, what we’ve got here is

much more of a collaborative storytelling
game. The rules concern themselves with
one thing: who gets to determine what
happens next. This means there are
some fairly unconventional
mechanics, mostly involving
shared narration, conflict
resolution rather than task
resolution, and non-linear
character development.
If you have tried these
kinds of things in
other games before
and have found that
you don’t like them,
then there is a
strong possibility
that this game is
not for you.
However, if you
are a fan of
Something here fast and light
RPG mechanics,
imaginative
storytelling,
the light-
heartedly
macabre, and
rolling big
handfuls of
dice, this is the
game for you.

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 Whut's a Spoookie-Beeen?
Spookybeans are a sub-group of the inhabitants of The Hollow, the default
setting for the game. Even within this sub-group, the diversity boggles the
mind. Spookybeans can be goth kids, ex-vampire hunters, alien invaders, fairy
princesses, caffeine-addicted conspiracy theorists, or very nearly anything
else you can think of that's just a little... twisted.

There are lots of other people around as well, of course. What fun it be would
if there weren't any norms to freak out?

>

Whut Are We S’posed Ta Do?

In this game, your characters will be subjected to the trials and tribulations
of life in a semi-suburban neighborhood that happens to be a giant magnet
for any and all kinds of supernatural weirdness that you can think of, quite
possibly the result of having sprung up around a sprawling 200 year old
cemetery. Each character has both a good ending and a bad ending, and your
actions during the game will help propel them toward one or the other at the
conclusion of the game. In the meantime, the goal is mainly just to have a good
time and tell an entertaining story or two.

Just try to relax.

This is for Science.

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 “Convolution”
Okay, here’s how it works:
1. The dominoes fall,
and the last one hits...

4. The scissors,
freeing...

3. The bucket,
pulling on...
2. The see-saw, 5. The bowling
launching the ball, which rolls
shuttlecock into... down, nudging...

6. The roller skate with

8. The balloon,
the welding glove, holding...
tied to...

7. The sewing
needle, popping...
9. The 2lb. 13. The latch holding
weight, lifting... the scythe, which
swings down and
decapitates Timmy.
10. The collander,
revealing...

11. The soup 12. Pickles The Welsh

bone, exciting... Terrier, pulling on the
string attached to...
Please
Keep
Wouldn’t it have been easier
Our to just punch him in the face Where’s the
School and take the candy bar? fun in that?
Clean!

Waiting
for
Zaibach

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 Part 2: Playing the Game
Q: How many goths does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Just one to hold the bulb, while the rest of the world
revolves around them.

What Do I Need to Play?

Not a whole lot, actually. A copy of these rules for a start, of course (or
more than one if you don't like to share); a few character sheets
(conveniently available for download from our website, badly photocopied from
the back of the book, or just hastily scribbled down on the back of a napkin);
some pens or pencils; some dice (or coins - anything with an even number of
sides/faces); and a couple of friends.

A Game Glossary
Adversity: A number of dice rolled by the GM during a Conflict, opposing the
dice rolled by a Player.

Bones: When using dice, the even-numbered results. When using coins, tails.
Bones results do not contribute to the success of a roll. They are
represented by this symbol: }

Character: A fictional persona. Characters are

generally divided into two categories: Player
Characters (controlled, appropriately
enough, by the Players) and Non-Player
Characters (controlled by the GM).

Concept: This is a short phrase that

describes your character. It can also
be used as a Thingy during Conflicts.

Conflict: A contested roll to determine

who has the right to narrate the outcome
of an exchange between two characters
whose agendas run at cross-purposes.
Conflicts usually involve a Player rolling
against the GM, but they can also be
Player vs. Player.

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 GM: Game Moderator. The participant of the game that does not direct a
main character but acts as a referee and arbitrator, guiding the general flow
of the story and directing the actions of the NPCs in response to the
actions of the PCs.

Narration: The winner of a Conflict earns the right to direct the course of
the events involved in the Conflict, with that player becoming a sort of “mini-
GM” for the next few minutes.

NPC: Non-Player Character. The supporting characters of the story,

directed by the GM.

Ouchies: When a player wins the right to narrate the results of a Conflict,
they can earn a point toward their character's good ending (Yo) by
incorporating some negative element (something inconvenient, embarrassing,
or harmful to their character) into the narration. Conversely, a player who
has lost a Conflict will likely find themselves inflicted with a point toward their
bad ending (Woe) when the winner inflicts some negative element on the
loser’s character in the course of the narration.

PC: Player Character. One of the main characters of the story directed by a
Player, and as such their primary means of exerting influence upon the game
environment and story.

Player: Can be used to refer to any participant in the game (as in, the GM is
also a player), but is usually used to refer to any of the participants of the
game that directs a main character (PC).

Pool: The dice rolled by a participant in a Conflict. Dice are moved from a
player's Stash to their Pool by referencing relevant Thingies, and dice may
also be donated by other players from their respective Stashes. GMs move a
number of dice equal to the Adversity from their Stash to their Pool for the
Conflict.

Session: One continuous block of play time. Sessions typically last between 2
and 5 hours, although this can vary according to the group's preference.

Skulls: When using dice, the odd-numbered results. When using coins, heads.
During Conflicts, the number of Skulls rolled by each side are totaled up and
compared to determine the winner of a roll. They are represented by this
symbol: {

Stash: Each player has a number of dice that can be used to either A) donate
to other players' Pools during Conflicts, or B) add to their own Pool by using
Thingies when involved in a Conflict.

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 Story: A sequence of events that has a definitive beginning, middle, and end.
Most story arcs take place over several sessions.

Thingies: These are the prominent features of your character (abilities,

backgrounds, personality traits, connections to other characters). Any
Thingies that are relevant to the Conflict at hand can be used to gain a
mechanical advantage.

Woe: A bad ending for your character. Written by another player for you.
Your Woe score starts at 1, and add 1 to it whenever another Player or the
GM uses an Ouchie against your character while narrating the results of a
Conflict in which you lost the die roll.

Yo: A good ending for your character. Your Yo score starts at 1, and add 1
to it whenever you use an Ouchie against your own character in the course
of narrating the results of a Conflict.

Character Creation
Like most other roleplaying games out there, in order to get in on the action
the players will need to create characters. This is easier than it might seem.
First, some ground rules:

• No two characters can share the same traits. This means that names,
character concepts, abilities, descriptions, whatever items they're
carrying, background, etc, should all be distinctive.
• Each character should be worthy of a story. Why are they here? Where
did they come from? Where are they going? Make sure they have
something to do when it's their turn in the spotlight.

The Setup
The best way to start is to have the group as a whole discuss what sort of
characters everyone wants to play. Players ideally should come to the table
with nothing but a vague idea or two about what kind of character they might
want to play. These ideas should be malleable enough to allow for adjustments
to accommodate the other characters. The goal is to come up with
characters that are going to be interesting and entertaining when they
interact with one another. Once you've got the basics, the rest is easy.

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 Character Sheet
Let's take a look at the character sheet. What does this stuff mean? Here's
a sample character:

Name Pauline
The Gothic Comics RPG

Starting

Concept Yo 1 2
Living Dead Girl Eventually opens her own
beatnik coffee shop.
Thingies
• Razor Sharp Teeth Woe
Starting
1 1
• Keen Senses
• Surprisingly Sociable
Ends up working as a
greeter at Sprawlmart.

Notes
Pauline has been having
the oddest cravings ever
since that zombie bite, but
she’s not about to let that
Thingies Left 1 get her down.

As you can see, Pauline's Concept of ‘Living Dead Girl’ is fairly solidly focused.
If Pauline were in a group that had any other character concepts with an
undead vibe, there might have to be some negotiation and revision of
concepts.

Under Thingies, we can see that Pauline's most relevant abilities at the
moment are that she has unnaturally acute senses, razor-sharp teeth (all
the better to rend human flesh), and that she's fairly outgoing for a zombie.
These are by no means the sum total of her talents, they’re just the abilities
that are relevant to the story at the moment. Whatever other skills Pauline
might possess have not been revealed as of yet. She also has 1 Thingy
banked, ready to be defined at any time during the game.

On the other side of the sheet, we have Yo and Woe, Pauline's good ending and
bad ending. If everything goes the way she wants, she will eventually be able
to open her own beatnik coffee shop. If not, she will end up working the front
door at a local mega-mart chain. Eeek. Fortunately, she’s got a head start on
her Yo.

So now we've seen the sheet, let's take a look at what all of this stuff means.

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 Name
Duh.

Concept
Besides your character's name, one of the first things you'll need to come up
with is your Concept. This is basically your character boiled down to one
short simple phrase like 'Paranoid Conspiracy Theorist', or 'Exiled Alien
Invader', or 'Spoiled Goth Princess'. This gives everyone a general idea of
what your character is all about, but more importantly it can be used as a
Thingy (see Thingies below).

Example:
Ralph's character Burnout has 'Biker Dude' as his Concept. This gets him
advantages in all kinds of situations, like when riding a motorcycle, or
intimidating someone into giving him their Jello pudding cup, or (with a little
creative persuasion on the part of the player) drinking someone under the
table.

Thingies
Thingies are everything that help to define your
character. This would be everything that in other
RPGs would normally be covered by attributes,
skills, backgrounds, advantages, merits, flaws,
edges, drawbacks, etc. The primary purpose of
Thingies is to enable you to gain an advantage
during Conflicts.

Every character starts with their Concept as their

first Thingy, and you get to define up to three more.
Thingies should be inspiring and exciting
(or at least amusing). For example,
'Strong' is, quite frankly, pretty boring.
'Strong as an Ox' is a little better, but The
something like 'Benchpresses Cars for South
Butt
Fun and Profit' is evocative of all
sorts of images. Thingies can also
provide background for a character.
'Short Temper' is somewhat bland,
but 'Once Killed a Guy With a Spork'
could be the basis for a story in and
of itself. It's fine if your Thingies are

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 a little vague, as this makes them more versatile. Here's some examples to
get you started, but you should feel free to make up your own:

• What you're good at: Computer Whiz, Dead Shot, Killer Fashion Sense, I
Know Kung Fu
• People you know: Army of Adoring Fans, Friends In High Places, My First
4 Speed Dial Numbers are Lawyers
• Stuff you carry around: Big Knife, Coat of Many Pockets, Lucky Zippo
• Where you've been or what you've done: Ex-Con, Former Marine,
Remember That One Time in Zanzibar?
• How you get what you want: Intimidating Bellow, Whine Incessantly, Mind-
Bending Circular Logic
• How you protect yourself: Flail Arms Wildly, Take It Like A Man, Run Away
• Personality traits: Blind Optimism, Sarcasm Personified, Hates Everyone
and Everything
• What you look like: Skinny Kid, Tall Drink of Water, Linebacker

Now, you don't have to come up with all of your Thingies right away; in fact,
it's probably better if you don't, as it allows for some flexibility down the road
(see the Development section on more about this). Just note down however
many you haven't used yet in the Thingies Left box on your sheet.

One other note about Thingies, they don't necessarily have to be positive.
You can take flaws and drawbacks as Thingies as well. This is because when
you're engaging in Conflicts, you're rolling to determine who gets to narrate
the results, not whether you succeeded or failed (see Conflicts for more on
this). As long as the Thingy is relevant to the Conflict, whether positively or
negatively, it gains you an advantage in determining narration rights (of
course, the nature of the Thingy should be taken into account when
narrating the results).

Yo and Woe
Each character comes with a pair of possible endings for their own personal
story. Your character's Yo is their good ending. It's what You The Player
want to eventually see happen to your character. Perhaps your character
starts a band and goes on to fame and fortune, and eventually plays a sold-
out show at Madison Square Garden. Maybe they make a ton of cash by
creating a new social networking website and selling the rights to Google.

The flip side of your character's Yo is their Woe: the bad ending. It can be a
cruelly ironic mirror image of your Yo, but it doesn't have to be. Maybe your
character winds up at a dead-end job, or their band breaks up, or they lose
their favorite leather jacket, or whatever. The catch here is that you don't
get to decide your Woe, one of your fellow players does (your consolation
prize is that you'll be determining someone else's Woe as well).

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 Your Yo and Woe also each have a numerical total associated with them, and
each starts at 1. Over the course of the game, you'll be accumulating points
towards one or the other based on how Ouchies get triggered in various
Conflicts (see Ouchies below). At the end of the adventure module you tally up
how many orcs you killed, and based on this number the GM consults table
34A and tells you where your spleen is now...

...Actually, what happens is that if you consistently hose your own character,
you earn momentum towards your Yo ending. If the GM or the other players
hose you, you earn Woe points. At the end of the story these are used to
determine what ultimately happens to your character (and sets up
interesting things for the next story).

Your Stash
There's one last thing to address before your character is complete, but it's
not listed on the sheet. Players start with a Stash of four dice each, and the
GM starts with a number of dice equal to the number of Players times four.
These dice can be any number of sides, as long as they're even (no funky d5s
or d7s).

Here's the thing about the dice in your Stash: they're not yours. Well, not
yet, anyway. You see, when your character gets involved in Conflicts, the dice
you'll be rolling (your Pool) will be determined by two things:

1. How many Thingies you have that are relevant to the Conflict, and
2. Whatever dice other people decide to contribute to your cause.

More about this in the Conflicts section.

Character Creation Overview

• Name: Make it a good one.
• Concept: One short phrase; your character in a nutshell.
• Thingies: What stands out about your character. Your Concept is your
first Thingy, and you can define up to 3 more. You don't have to come up
with them right away; if you want, you can save some or all of them for
later, to be defined at any time during the game. You will also have the
opportunity to add more later.
• Yo: Come up with a good ending for your character. Write 1 in the little
box next to it.
• Woe: Everyone pass your sheet to the player on your left (skipping the
GM, of course). On the sheet you just received, come up with a bad ending
for your friend's character (and pass it back). Grimace over the fate
your friend has selected for you, and write 1 in the little box next to it.
• Stash: Grab 4 dice.
• Portrait: Draw a nifty picture of your character, or steal something
from the Internet. We won't tell.

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 Conflicts
Most of the time, when a player states that their character is doing
something, it just happens, as in: “Cameron ties his shoes”; “Nikki walks into
Zippy Mart.” However, there will be times when a player's description of
events will be challenged by someone else in the group. This is where Conflicts
comes in to play. Conflicts happen whenever characters are locked in an epic
struggle for the fate of the universe. Or for when people are trying to fling
lunchboxes at each others' heads. Or for when people are trying to humiliate
each other with snide comments and catty remarks. You get the idea.

It’s important to note that Conflicts occur between players (as in, the actual
people around the table, so either Player vs GM or Player vs Player), not
between characters. The characters do whatever you say they do. The
purpose of the Conflict system is to determine who gets the right to narrate
the results of a particular exchange.

Player vs. GM
Anyone can call for a Conflict against someone else, but the majority of
Conflicts are likely to be between a Player and the GM (acting through one or
more NPCs or through the environment itself).

Adversity
If the Conflict is between a player and the GM, the first step is for the GM to
determine the Adversity of the roll, which is the number of dice the GM will be
rolling for the Conflict. This is similar to Difficulty ratings in other RPGs, but
instead of measuring how challenging a particular task is, Adversity is more
directly a measure of how much the GM wants the PC to fail. A good number
to start with for Adversity is the number of players at the table (including
the GM), but of course this can be adjusted upwards or downwards to taste
on a case by case basis. So those dice get pulled right out of the GM's Stash,
and that's their Pool for the Conflict. And don’t be sneaky about it, just slam
those dice right down on the table for everyone to see.

Example:
Bob's character Cameron wants to bust open a vending machine to get at its
sweet sweet candy guts. The GM doesn't care too much about this course of
action but he doesn't want to just give it to him, so he leaves the Adversity
at the default, which in this case would be 4 (Bob, Alice, Joe, and Sam the GM
himself).

Example:
Joe's character Blergh the Thawed-out Caveman is trying to start a car
with a shoe. The GM thinks this is a patently ridiculous idea, and drops 7 dice
on the table. “That’s for wasting my time. Bring it.”

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 Thingies
For each of of your character's Thingies (including Concept) that are
relevant to the Conflict at hand, you may take a die from your Stash and add
it to your Pool to use during the Conflict. Players should be prepared to give
a justification for activating a Thingy if questioned, otherwise the GM may
deem it inappropriate for the Conflict at hand.

Example:
Alice's character Nikki is looking to tag up the mayor's new reelection
campaign signs. One of her Thingies, "Zen Vandalism", is tailor-made for this
sort of reprehensible behavior, so Alice gets to grab a die from her Stash
and add it to her Pool.

Example:
Weird Ernie is trying to get away from Brock Thompson, who is intent on
giving him an atomic wedgie. Jeff tries to make the case that his “Paranoia-
Borne Prescience” Thingy is relevant to finding an escape route, but the GM
isn’t buying it. “You should have used it to see this coming, Kreskin. Suck it
up.” Ernie is about to enter a world of pain. Unless...

A Little Help From My Friends

As you can see, usually the dice gained from Thingies are not going to be
enough to do the job. What's a player to do? Time to look across the table at
those friends of yours. Based on how amusing, plot-advancing, or mutually
beneficial the intended action is, the other players decide if they're prepared
to offer up some of their own dice to the effort. When a player enters into a
Conflict, each of the other players may choose to contribute as many dice
from their own Stashes as they want to the effort.

Example:
Nikki wants very much to steal a local rich kid's bicycle, which happens to be
protected by the well-nigh impenetrable might of the HomeyPleeze security
system (GM sets the Adversity at 6). This really sucks, so Alice petitions the
other players for assistance. Bob tells Alice to blow chunks, which isn't very
nice at all, but Ralph remembers that time Nikki helped Burnout shoplift
disposable razors from the Zippy Mart, and so he gives her two of his dice.
Aren't friends great?

Example:
Cameron's trying for that vending machine, and doesn't have any relevant
Thingies, so Bob needs dice badly. Joe takes pity and tosses him a die. Alice,
however, holds out because of the bicycle thing, but Bob reminds her that
he's her ride home that night. Alice tosses him three dice.

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 Now I know what you're thinking: Why wouldn't everyone simply pony up all the
dice they have to their buddy during the current Conflict, knowing that
everyone else can do the same when it's their turn? Simple. Once the Conflict
is over, the dice your buddy rolled are going to the GM, and vice versa. See
Aftermath, below, for more info.

6.
8

2
4
4 .

6.
9

1
8
12

1
20

2
5

9.

7
1
3

10
2 14
6.
8

4
This is How We Roll
Dice are used to determine the outcome of a Conflict. When you roll the dice,
all you're looking for are odd numbers (1, 3, 5, 7, etc), which we call Skulls ({),
and even numbers (2, 4, 6, 8, etc), which we call Bones (}). This flexibility
extends to other randomizers as well. If you don't have any dice handy, you
can flip coins, in which case heads are Skulls (duh), and tails are Bones. By the
way, Skulls are good, Bones are bad (well, they're not horrible, they just don't
do anything useful).

Example:
• You roll 3 six-sided dice and get a 3, 1, and 6: {{}.
• You flip 6 coins and get heads, heads, heads, tails, tails, tails: {{{}}}.
• You roll a 6-sided die, a 4-sided die, and a 20-sided die, and get 1, 17, and
4: {{}.
• You roll 2 ten-sided dice and flip 3 coins, and get 5, 3, heads, tails, tails:
{{{}}.
• You flip two coins, roll percentile dice, draw two cards from a poker deck,
drink all the beer out of the fridge, pee on the rug, and go home. You win.

When each side has as many dice as they're going to get, it's time to roll. Each
side rolls the dice in their respective Pools, and counts up how many came up
Skulls. If the Player's Skulls equals or exceeds the GM's Skulls, they win the
Conflict. If not, then the Player has failed.

Narration
Whoever wins the roll gets to narrate the results of the Conflict,
incorporating any Thingies used. The narration should be constrained to the
events of the Conflict, but new elements can also be brought in to take the
story in a new direction. This is of course, always subject to public opinion,
and ultimately the GM has final say as to whether or not something is outside
the bounds of Conflict narration.

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 Example:
Alice wins the roll against the GM for the graffitti. The result: "Nikki spends
all afternoon and goes through 4 cans of spraypaint, but when she's done all
of the mayor's campaign posters are covered with humorous epithets
regarding the mayor's parentage and possible mental & sexual deficiencies.”

Example:
Predictably, Joe loses the roll against the GM for Blergh’s attempt to start
the car. The GM decides that Blergh does everything he can think of to start
the car, but nothing seems to work so he eventually resorts to just banging
the shoe on the dashboard for about half an hour, by which time the liquor
store is definitely closed.

Ouchies, Yo and Woe

Normally, when a player wins a roll and earns the right to narrate the results
of a Conflict, they will usually use that opportunity to narrate their
character doing something cool and awesome. This is all perfectly natural, and
nothing to be ashamed of. However, this is a comedy RPG, and bad stuff
happening to characters is always funny. If a player can incorporate some
kind of negative effect or event that happens to their character in the
process of narrating their character's actions, they earn bonus points. The
flip side of this is that when you lose a Conflict, the winner is also free to do
the same thing to your character. In mechanical terms, the way Ouchies are
used has an effect on your Yo and Woe.

Here's how it breaks down:

• When you win a Conflict, you can inflict an Ouchie on your own character
and use it in the narration to gain 1 point toward your Yo score.
• When the GM (or another player, see below) wins a Conflict and uses an
Ouchie against your character, you earn 1 point toward your Woe score.

In order to facilitate their incorporation into narration, Ouchies basically

come in three flavors:

• Complications are things that make your character's life more difficult,
like dropping your keys down a sewer grate, or the cops showing up at
the wrong moment.
• Humiliations are things that embarrass your character, like getting a
truckload of horse manure dropped on you, or getting pantsed in front
of the girls' volleyball team.
• Injuries are things that actually hurt your character. This can cover
anything from minor cuts and scrapes all the way up to broken bones or
being knocked out. Fortunately, the fairly cartoony nature of the game
allows you to bounce back from these pretty quickly.

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 There's no real mechanical difference between them, they're just there to
help adjust the tone of your narration. A character that has mostly
Complications or Injuries inflicted on them has a very different look and feel
than one that suffers constant Humiliations.

Example:
Bob wins the roll for Cameron vs. The Vending Machine, so he narrates the
results. Bob's decided that while Cameron has managed to liberate a dozen or
so Fun-Size Crunchy bars from the vending machine, the sound of someone
beating on a large metal box with a broom handle has attracted the attention
of a local campus security guard, and he calls out in a loud, official voice,
"What's all this, then?" as he's striding across the quad. Cameron quickly
gathers up the candy and makes a break for it. Bob gains 1 Yo.

Example:
Weird Ernie has been looking for evidence of alien interference at the local
dairy farm. Unfortunately, Jeff has managed to fail the roll. The GM decides
that not only did Ernie not find any proof of a plot to spike the town's milk
supply with a drug that would make people more susceptible to alien mind
control devices, he also trips while making his way across the pasture and
lands face down in a cowpat. Jeff gains 1 Woe.

Aftermath
Finally, the two participants in the Conflict exchange all the dice they rolled,
and all those dice go into their respective Stashes, ready to be given to
someone else when they need to roll for something. This keeps the dice
flowing around the table like ichor in some horrible ancient tentacled
nightmare of a beast, slumbering in a sunken city beneath the ocean. It also
gives players a good reason not to give all their dice to the player who's
about to make that roll: any dice you give them to beat the Conflict now are
going straight into the GM’s Stash afterward, ready to pump up the
Adversity when it’s your turn. However, if no one gives dice to anyone else
during Conflicts, everyone's going to end up failing rolls all the time, and their
Woe scores will skyrocket. The trick is to find a nice balance in between.

Here lies Here lies John Strange, Esq

ikle
Ezekial A the body of
Age 102 Jonathan Blake Here lies an
Stepped on the gas honest lawyer,
ng Instead of the brake
The Good Die You And that
is Strange

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 Player vs. GM Conflict Overview
1. The GM sets the Adversity (the default is the number of people at the
table, including GM), takes that many dice from their Stash, and adds it
to their Pool.
2. For each relevant Thingy (including Concept), the Player can take one die
from their own Stash and add it to their Pool to use in this Conflict.
3. Other players can choose to donate dice from their Stashes to help
their buddy out (Alternately, they may opt not to donate dice).
4. Player and GM roll the dice. Huzzah!
5. If the Player's Skulls equals or exceeds the GM's Skulls, the Player wins
the roll.
6. However, if the GM's Skulls exceeds the Player's Skulls, the Player fails
the roll.
7. The winner of the Conflict narrates the outcome, incorporating any
Thingies used. If they want, they can also choose to incorporate an
Ouchie into the narration. If the Player uses an Ouchie, they earn 1 Yo. If
the GM uses an Ouchie, the Player earns 1 Woe.
8. Each side exchanges the dice that were rolled, which are then added to
the participants' respective Stashes.

Example:
Cameron really needs to hack the school's computer to fix his grades. The
GM sets the Adversity at 4. Cameron's “My Kung Foo Is The Best” Thingy
gets him a die. Bob's friends donate a total of 3 dice. Bob and the GM roll. Bob
rolls his 4 dice, and gets {{{}. The GM rolls 4 dice, and gets {{}}.
Bob's 3 Skulls beats the GM's 2. Result: Bob narrates how the Conflict goes
down, the GM and Bob each add 4 dice to their respective Stashes (4 dice
were rolled on each side), and Cameron comes home with a A- in Chemistry.

Example:
Weird Ernie finds himself in gym class, and he needs to make a jump shot from
the 3-point line as part of the PSAL tests. The GM sets the Adversity at 4.
Ernie's not even remotely athletic, and thus has no relevant Thingies, so no
free dice. The other players feel sorry for Ernie, and donate a total of 3
dice. Jeff and the GM both roll. Jeff gets {}}, and the GM gets {{}}.
Result: The GM decides that the ball bounces off the rim and flies back
across the gym, smacking the gym teacher on the side of his head. Now
Ernie's got some splainin' to do. Jeff adds 4 dice to his Stash, the GM adds 3
to theirs, and Ernie gains 1 Woe.

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 Player vs. Player
Things work pretty much the same for when one Player calls for a roll against
another, with some slight alterations. First of all, there's no Adversity. Each
of the Players can gain dice from their Stashes if they have any relevant
Thingies as normal, and then both Players rely on the rest of the group for
additional dice.The winner of the roll gets to narrate the outcome of the
Conflict. If a player hoses their own character with an Ouchie during
narration, they earn 1 Yo. If a player uses an Ouchie against the opposing
character, the loser gains 1 Woe. It is possible for both of these to happen
at once. Finally, any dice that were rolled are exchanged, and are then added
to the players' respective Stashes.

Player vs. Player Conflict Overview

1. Both Players can use any
relevant Thingies to each gain
a die from their respective
Stashes.
2. The other players (and the
GM) can give additional dice
to either side, depending on
how they want to see the
Conflict go. One can even give
dice to both sides, just to
inject a little chaos into the
proceedings.
3. Both Players roll the dice.
Huzzah!
4. Whoever gets the most
Skulls wins the roll and
narrates the results of
the Conflict (incorporating
any Thingies used). Ties favor
the side that didn't call for the
Conflict.
5. If the winner of the roll uses an
Ouchie against themselves, they earn
1 Yo.
6. If the winner of the roll uses an
Ouchie against the other Player's
character, the loser earns 1 Woe.
7. Steps 5 and 6 are not mutually
exclusive.
8. Each side exchanges the dice that
were rolled, which are then added to
the participants' respective Stashes.

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 Example:
The zombies are invading, and the PCs have barricaded themselves in a liquor
store. Unfortunately, they've neglected to bring any supplies or food. It's
been a day and a half, and people are starting to get hungry. Wes wants to
pry open the window and go get some tacos. Burnout thinks that this is a Bad
Idea, since the zombies are right outside and will take the first available
opportunity to gain entry, and decides he's going to try and stop Wes. As far
as Thingies, Burnout's got 'Biker Dude' going for him (gaining him 1 die), while
Wes doesn't really have anything relevant. Now Wes and Burnout's players,
Phil and Ralph, look to the rest of the group. Alice gives Phil 1 die, reasoning
that Nikki's hungry, too. Jeff gives Ralph 1 die, since he doesn't want to give
the zombies a chance to get inside. The GM decides to make things
interesting, and gives Phil and Ralph 1 additional die each. Phil rolls 2 dice, and
gets {{. Ralph rolls 3 dice, getting {{{. Result: Ralph narrates Burnout
grabbing Wes by the scruff of the neck and hauling him back to the
stockroom and locking him in for a bit to cool off, reasoning that Wes is mainly
just panicking and should be fine in a few minutes or so. Upon walking back to
the front counter, he trips and knocks over a display stand carrying bottles
of cheap gin, breaking several of the bottles. Ralph earns 1 Yo for using the
Ouchie and adds 2 dice to his Stash, while Phil gains 1 Woe for Wes getting
locked up, and adds 3 dice to his Stash.

Example:
Nikki comes into the cafeteria of Ross Perot High School, and Victoria
decides that she’s going to try and trip her as she gets on line for lunch.
Lanie, Victoria’s player, has no trouble convincing the GM that “Meanest Girl
In School” definitely applies here, but none of her other Thingies do. Nikki,
meanwhile, doesn’t have anything in particular to bring to the table (she can’t
break out the Lighter & Hairspray in school without getting into serious
trouble, and she’s already been sent to the Principal’s office three times this
month). The other players donate a total of 2 dice to Lanie, and 4 dice to
Alice (everyone loves the underdog). Everyone rolls. Lanie gets {{, while
Alice gets {{{{, and an evil grin. Alice decides that Nikki notices
Victoria’s rather clumsy attempt to send Nikki sprawling on the floor, and not
only avoids it, but also grabs a lunch tray from the rack and whacks Victoria
upside the head with it. “Better luck next time, Trust Fund.” Victoria gains 1
Woe, while Nikki doesn’t gain anything, as Alice didn’t include anything negative
happening to her own character. Lanie gets Alice’s 4 dice and adds them to
her Stash, while Alice gets Lanie’s 3 dice.

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 Character Development
Most RPGs attempt to simulate characters slowly getting better at various
skills over time. Here, characters develop a bit differently. As the story
progresses, more information about the characters is revealed as various
traits or skills are displayed.

Thingies
First of all, if you didn't specify all of your Thingies at character creation,
you have the opportunity to do so at any time during the game.

At. Any. Time.

Defining new Thingies during the course of play represents the revelation of
already existing but previously unspecified abilities. In other words, your
character is not necessarily learning new skills, they are simply choosing that
particular moment to reveal some ability they already had. This can be useful
in situations where suddenly there is a need for someone with a specific
talent or skill, and you can step up and say, “Why yes, I can do that”, and the
day is saved.

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 Example:
Our intrepid gang is trapped on the third floor of a burning building and needs
to find a way to get out safely. Alice decides that this is a good time to let
everyone know that Nikki is a whiz with tying knots. Nikki happens to have at
least 1 Thingy left undefined at the moment, so Alice decides to add “Gets
Kinky With Ropes” to Nikki's sheet. Alice now has a relevant Thingy which she
can use to see if she can tie enough bed sheets together in time for
everyone to climb out the window before the floor gives out.

In the example above, Nikki didn't just suddenly learn how to tie knots; the
fact that she was always good at it simply hadn't come up before. The rules
from character creation still apply: you can't add a Thingy that steps on
someone else's character, and the new Thingy had better be interesting and
entertaining. Additionally, be prepared to give a plausible explanation of why
the ability hadn't come up before, if there had previously been situations in
which it would have been useful.

Yes, you can get more than three Thingies, you munchkin. If you achieve your
character's Good Ending by rolling more Skulls on your Yo than on your Woe
at the end of a story, you earn yourself a shiny new Thingy. Just like that,
anything you want. Just write it in with the others. And just like the Thingies
you started with, you don't even have to come up with one right away, you can
bank it for later. Aren't you special?

12
3
9
6

Out

In

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 Yo and Woe
At the end of every scenario, each player rolls to see which ending happens
to their character, their Yo or their Woe. Here's how it works:

1. Grab a number of dice equal to your Yo score.

2. For each Thingy you have that’s relevant to realizing your greatest
hopes and dreams (your Yo), you can grab an additional die.
3. The GM will grab a number of dice equal to your Woe score.
4. Player and GM roll the dice. Huzzah!
5. If the Player's Skulls equals or exceeds the GM's Skulls, the Player wins
the roll, their character's Yo comes to pass, and they get to add a
Thingy to their character.
6. However, if the GM's Skulls exceeds the Player's Skulls, the Player fails
the roll, and their character's Woe comes to pass.

Whichever ending comes to fruition is erased from the sheet, to be replaced

by a new one at the beginning of the next story. Whichever ending didn't
happen is left alone for next time. If a Player achieves their Yo, they get to
write a new one. If a Player suffers their Woe, the new one is written by one
of the other Players. The scores are then both reset to 1.

Example:
Alistair the Armchair Occultist has a Yo ending of "Summon a Girlfriend", and
a Woe ending of "Accidentally Get Polymorphed into Limbless Slug". By the end
of the scenario, his Yo is 3 and his Woe is 2. He rolls 3 dice and gets {{}.
The GM rolls 2 dice and gets {{. As a result, by the skin of his teeth,
Alistair manages to transcend the mortal limitations of having social skills to
conjure his very own Level 0 Human Female. At the beginning of the next
scenario, he'll have a girlfriend that he won't have to inflate for once. His Woe
remains the same since it didn't come to pass, but he must select a new Yo,
since he achieved the original one. Something like "Get Girlfriend to Actually
Like Me" might be a good place to start.

Example:
Nikki has the Yo ending of "Total Rockstar Babe" and the Woe ending of "Ends
up Working at the Perfume Counter of Jacy's". Alice has bolloxed a number of
Conflicts during the scenario, andSomething
has endedhere to pad
up with a Yo of 2 and a Woe of 4.
However, the GM takes pity and allows Alice to roll an additional die for “I Rule
The Moshpit”. Alice rolls 3 dice, and gets {{}. The GM rolls 4 dice, and gets
{{{. At the beginning of the next game, Nikki will be mired in the depths of
minimum wage drudgery, and a new Woe will have to be devised (by the player
to her left) to reflect the chances of sinking even deeper, like "Promoted to
Assistant Manager". Her Yo remains the same.

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 As you've probably noticed, the resolution of Yo and Woe endings can provide
great hooks for where characters start out in the beginning of the next
story. Players and GMs can make the most of these outcomes, besides the
simple mechanic of gained or lost Thingies, by integrating the content of
these outcomes into their characters' further adventures.

That's it?
Yeah, ain’t it great? No initiative rolls, no THAC0, no damage rolls, no weapon
statistic charts, no wound effects tables, no average healing times, no
chance of death rolls, no blood loss effects rules, no permanent wound
effects rules, no area-effect weapon rules, no mass combat system, no scale
miniatures rules, no tactical positioning rules, no troop morale rules, no hex
grid facing rules, no movement rate comparison charts, no... well, you get the
idea.

Time to
take your
medicine!

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 Gamer Freaks
“Agenda Clash”
After many challenges, you have made your way through the
ancient castle to the vampire’s lair. The coffin opens and the I step forward and drop to one knee.
vampire lord rises up and prepares to do battle -- “We have come to serve you, O Master!
Accept us as your faithful servants!”

Wait, what? No, There’s nothing in the rules that See? I take off my gorget
you can’t do that. says we can’t become vampires, dude. to expose my jugular.

That’s not the point. The reason you came to Nah, that sounds boring. I want to join the
the castle in the first place was to kill the vampire ranks of the undead and rule the countryside
lord and free the town from his tyranny! with an iron fist for all eternity!

*sigh* Fine. Grab the Monster Manual

I’m gonna be a naughty
and start applying the undead template.
vampire god!

rr*
*gr

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 Part 3: Running the Game
Always remember: Friends will help you move,
but real friends will help you move bodies.

Let's Get Going Already!

So now you've got this great new game, and your friends are bugging you to
run it for them. Now what?

Fortunately, this is not the sort of game that requires a large “Dungeon
Master's Eyes Only! Players Keep Out!” section, so what follows is simply a
collection of guidelines for both GMs and Players to help make running the
game a little easier. Part 2 was all about how the players interact with the
rules of the game. This chapter is mainly about how the players interact with
each other in the game. That is, the actual people at the table, not just the
characters themselves.

Why Group Character

Creation Rocks on Toast
As we've seen from the character creation
rules, the players are required to create
their characters together. There are two
main reasons for this:

1. It gets the players involved with each

others' characters.
2. It makes the GM's life easier.

Sometimes a little additional

legwork before the game
starts can save you a lot of
headaches later on. Over
the years a lot of GMs have
started a lot of games across a
lot of systems by having their
players simply show up with completed
character sheets in hand, only to throw
the PCs together and get a big fat...
nothing.

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 When setting up for a
game, ask your players to
come to the table with only
Stupid GM Trick #42: a couple of vague ideas for
Interconnected PCs character concepts but
Once you've got everyone together and nothing concrete. Asking
they’ve got their concepts, pick one of the for more than one concept
players (any method will do; highest die roll, from each of them helps to
pick names out of a hat, or just point at prevent them from
someone at random) and ask them to becoming too attached to
introduce their character to the rest of the a single character and not
group. For now, we'll call them Player #1. wanting to let go if it
doesn't fit with everyone
Example: else's ideas. Once you've
Alice gets up and says, “Hi, my name got your players together,
is Nikki, and I like loud obnoxious get them to start
music and bungee jumping.” The brainstorming about what
group responds, “Hi, Nikki.” kinds of characters they
want to play. Encourage
Then go on to Player #2 and do the same. them to bounce their ideas
off each other. The goal is
After Alice, Bob gets up and says, to create characters that
“Hi, my name is Cameron, and I'm the are going to be interesting
greatest hacker in the known when they interact
universe.” The group responds, “Hi, together, either
Cameron.” cooperatively or
antagonistically. It's all
Now, before proceeding to Player #3, the GM good here, as long as it's
should ask Player #2 how they know Player entertaining. Bottom line,
#1's character. no character is an island.

The GM says, “Alright, Bob, how does Note to GM and players

Cameron know Nikki?” Bob says, “We alike: Any criticism offered
went to high school together.” GM should of course be
says, “OK, boring, but I'll allow it. We'll constructive. Simply telling
just tell everyone that you met in someone "UR GUY IS TEH
detention.” SUCK!!1!one" doesn't help
anyone. Be prepared to
Then we can go around the room, repeating offer real suggestions on
these steps for each player. Rinse/Repeat how to make the character
until everyone knows at least two other better.
characters. And so they don't feel left out,
at the end of it all go back and ask Player #1
how they know the last player (Player #n).

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 Scene Framing 101
In movies, a scene is defined as a
shot or series of shots
constituting a unit of continuous
related action. A new scene is Stupid GM Trick #124:
usually denoted by a change in
time and/or location.
Overlapping Scenes
When the players have split into two or
more groups it's often beneficial to run
The thing to remember about
several scenes back to back, allowing the
scenes is that they have
players to pursue their separate goals
discrete beginnings and endings.
simultaneously. Always remember to
The ability to efficiently
switch between active scenes fairly
establish when a sequence of
quickly. Five to ten minutes between
events begins and ends, what
cuts can help build suspense among the
characters are involved, and
players, whereas intervals of half an
where it takes place is known as
hour or more can result in boredom on
Scene Framing, and is a vital skill
the part of the inactive players. If you
for any GM.
want to get really creative, you can have
effects from one scene carry over into
During the course of a game you
another.
don't have to play out
everything minute by minute in
Example:
real time. Movies are a great
Cameron is currently on the
example to follow: filmmakers
run from a rent-a-cop after
take great care to trim out the
the vending machine mishap.
boring bits, so all you're left with
Meanwhile, Weird Ernie is
is the action and the drama.
searching for evidence of an
Good GMs will want to do the
alien abduction in the park. He
same for their games.
bends down to examine a
suspicious scorch mark in the
grass and is nearly bowled over
by Cameron, who pulls off a
somersault over Ernie and hits
the ground running. For
humorous effect, Ernie just
manages to pick himself up, dust
himself off, and find his glasses
when the rent-a-cop slams into
him, knocking him down again.
The ensuing tangle of limbs
allows Cameron time to
disappear into the trees.

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 When deciding how to open a scene, you generally want to cut right to the
good stuff. Then, when the main action for a scene is over and there's
nothing else meaningful going on, end the scene and cut to the next one. Think
of each scene like a big party. No one likes to arrive too early because
there's nothing happening yet, and no one likes to stick around long enough to
get roped into helping clean up.

Example:
Weird Ernie has just received a phone call at 8pm asking him to meet a
mysterious informant in an underground parking garage at midnight. If
there's nothing else happening in the intervening time that will impact the
story, then the GM can simply cut to Ernie standing in the parking garage
when a shadowy female figure steps out from the shadows. Just as she hands
him the manila envelope with the evidence, she is hit with a poison dart in the
neck. And now Ernie has to run...

One important point: always remember to check with everyone at the table
before deciding to move to the next scene. In the previous example, the GM
should check with Ernie's player (or anyone else, for that matter) to see if
there's anything they want to do before meeting the informant. Most of the
time, a simple “Any objections? No? Okay, let's move on, then" will suffice.

A Practical Guide to Cheerleading

Many roleplaying games embrace the idea of immersion, where the player
closely identifies with their character and strives to think as their
character would and only act on what their character knows and sees. This is
all well and fine, but in locking yourself into this mode of play you end up
robbing yourself of some exciting and fun opportunities to enjoy the story
as a member of the audience as well as a participant.

Here's something to consider: think of your favorite movie, TV show, book,

whatever. Now think of your favorite character in that story, and ask
yourself: Do you skip through all the parts where that character is not
present? Of course not, because you would lose your appreciation of the
story as a whole. It can be the same in roleplaying games as well. Don't tune
out when your character is off-scene, stay involved and enjoy the rest of
the story.

One aspect of this is the practice of getting involved in what's going on with
the other characters, possibly to the point of offering suggestions and
advice to the other players, even if your character is off on another

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 continent at the time. Some game systems refer to this as metagaming and
tend to frown upon it. However, we call this practice Cheerleading and believe
it is something to be encouraged, which is why the game mechanics put it
front and center.

It's the intent behind the behavior that's important. If you tell Alice to cast
Ice Bolt at the giant wyrm the GM just threw at you because you just looked
it up in the Monster Manual and noticed that it has a -5 to its save against
cold attacks, that's metagaming. It can get you smacked in certain company,
especially if your character isn't in the same scene at the time, or if your
character has no specific knowledge of the giant wyrm's weakness against
cold. If however, you tell Bob to try and convince the cops that he was
actually just on his way to a Bible study and not in fact in the middle of a
game of mailbox-baseball, because it's funny as hell, then that's cheerleading
and it's all good. The goal (for both GMs and players) is to get everyone else
engaged in what's going on at any given moment, even if their character is not
in that scene.

Players, if someone else at the table is offering suggestions for what your
character should do next, take it as a supreme compliment because it means
they are paying attention to you and they care about your character. And
they're not just flipping through rulebooks or checking messages on their
iPhone while they wait for their turn.

>

The Rule of Awesome

The Rule of Awesome is simple: if a player wants to do something that people
(other players, the GM, your mom) think is cool, they should succeed, or at
least get rewarded for the effort. This doesn't necessarily mean that
characters can simply do whatever you want all the time without risk or
challenge, but rather that the more entertaining a particular course of
events will be, the more the rest of the group should invest in its success.
This is one of the cornerstones of our mechanics, and it manifests in a very
specific way.

The notion of giving dice - and specifically when, how, and to whom you give
them - is representative. You already know that when a Conflict occurs, the
player enacting the action in question has limited ability, beyond debating the
relevance of Thingies, to influence its success or failure (Yeah, okay, you roll
the dice yourself. Who's a big boy, then?). Notice, though, that the single most
influential faction - the people deciding how many dice you get to roll and
therefore your likelihood of success - is everyone BUT the acting player. The
audience, if you will. The bidding system means that the flow of the story -
who succeeds at what and how it guides the progression of the plot - is

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 determined in large part by the consensus of how awesome the latest leg of
storytelling is.

Think of it this way: all other things being equal, the more dice your fellow
players contribute to your effort, the more awesome they think your
intended actions are. Win or lose, it's a good indicator of what everyone
wants to see more of out of you and what's entertaining.

The implications of this are mind-boggling. Carry a heap of dice in your pocket
tomorrow when you go to work or school. The next time the smelly guy sits
next to you on the train, show him a handful of D6's and say, "I'll give you this
many dice to leave." The next time your boss tells you that your raise isn't in
the budget, set a pile of dice on his desk, shake your head, and then take
them all back and stuff them in your pocket before stalking out with a well-
earned smug smile of satisfaction on your face. The next time your mother-
in-law calls you for her weekly contact to tell you that it's really time to have
some grandchildren, tell her that you'd love to but your friends have only
given you one die for it and the Adversity is like 12, so we should probably
just let the issue drop. We aren't allowed to suggest how you can influence
national elections in this way. We leave it to the more intelligent among you to
read between the lines. The cream always rises. *wink*

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 The simplest manifestation of the Rule of Awesome is something that is not
only non-mechanical, but is something that human nature has propogated
since the very first non-tactical roleplaying games. We didn't invent it.
Roleplaying games didn't even invent it. Basically, if people want something to
happen (or are just totally not invested in it one way or another, to be fair),
they let it happen. Since time out of mind, players have said "I'm gonna do X,"
and the GM thinks for a moment and says, "okay, that seems reasonable," and
it happens. No roll necessary. Yes, there are definitely actions in roleplaying
games that call for a mechanical resolution, but there are plenty that don't.

Nobody's stopping the GM (in any

game, last time we checked) from
agreeing that something you
want to do makes perfect sense
to occur without question or
chance, and just stipulating it. The
Rule of Awesome has always been
around, even if we didn't have a name
for it (Vincent Baker, writer of Dogs in
the Vineyard and Apocalypse World, calls
it "Say 'Yes' or roll the dice"). If you're
entertaining enough, funny enough,
interesting enough, make the game
enjoyable for everyone, nobody is going to
want to stop you from doing whatever it was
you intended. They'd have to be a complete
moron if they did. And then you'd just beat
them up and send them home.

One other thing: If someone does or says

something that just makes you fall out of
your chair laughing, toss ‘em a die, just cuz.

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 Balance
A very wise game designer* once said that game balance doesn't come from
rules ensuring that everyone is able to deal out the exact same amount of
damage with their respective abilities/powers/gear, it comes from the GM
making sure everyone around the table gets an equal amount of time in the
spotlight. It just so happens that we've developed these rules in such a way
that they can help with that.

Due to the way the Conflict mechanics work, the dice will tend to drift back
and forth between the people at the table. This can be a handy indicator of
how much they've been participating and whether you might need to change
gears a bit.

If a player has a lot of dice in front of them compared to most of the other
players, they've probably been in the focus of the story for quite a bit, and
gone through several Conflicts. Conversely, if you see that there's someone
at the table with very few dice in front of them, it means that they've been
contributing to other players' rolls and it's time to reward them by swinging
that spotlight over and getting them involved in some Conflicts. By keeping
close tabs on who has how many dice, the GM can keep that spotlight spinning
regularly, and ensure that everyone has a chance to participate equally.

This works for the GM as well. If you notice that

you've ended up with all the dice and the players
mostly have none, it's time to pump up the
Adversity so you can start throwing those dice
around, and really pound on them for some
serious Woe. Likewise, if you're running low
on dice let the PCs have their moment in
the sun and ease off on the Adversity
for a while.

As a player, if you find yourself with

an excess of dice, start tossing
more of them to your friends when
they're trying to do things. You
can also take the opportunity to
make your character shine by
doing things that are in line with
your Concept or Thingies.
Conversely, if you're running low
on dice, make deals with the other
players for dice during your rolls.

* It was John Wick.

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 Competition
Taking a look at the system as a whole for a moment, you can see that there
is potential for a fair bit of antagonism between players and GM built into it.
The GM tries to win Conflicts in order to cause bad stuff to happen to PCs
and thus inflict Woe points on them, while the Players try to win Conflicts and
make their characters look cool, while occasionally causing bad stuff to
happen to their PCs to earn enough Yo points to counteract the Woe they've
received and eventually come out on top.

Now, it’s not set up this way to

cause bad feelings between
the GM and the Players,
but because adversity
builds character. The
story of a warrior
who goes toe to toe
with an overwhelming
force and succeeds
by the skin of his
teeth is simply more
exciting than that
of a warrior who
wades through
mountains of
enemies and never
makes a mistake, never
gets injured, never has to deal with
unexpected complications.

Here’s the thing: The PCs (and by

extension, the Players) are the Harlem
Globetrotters: their job is to showboat and
do cool stuff. The GM and NPCs are the
Washington Generals: their job is to make
the PCs look good. Now, that doesn’t mean
you just hand victory to them; quite the
opposite, in fact. Make them work for it. After
all, the Globetrotters are still playing
basketball. And every once in a while, the
Generals win (alright, only once so far).
Conflicts are a way for the GM to say to the
Players, "Hey, look at the overwhelming pile of
crap I just threw at you, and you were still able
to come out on top. Go you."

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 This sort of creative rivalry can occur amongst the Players themselves as
well. Several of the scenarios coming up in the next chapter are designed for
the group to be split into teams, each working against the other. This
completely changes the nature of the game. Now it's not just all of you
against the GM, it's some of you against the rest of you, with the GM in the
middle of it all. Obviously this style works best with larger groups (say, more
than four players), and it's always a good idea to try and balance the
numbers. Three vs. three works much better than four vs. two. For groups
with an uneven number of players (not counting the GM), the GM can try to
square things up a little by inserting an NPC into the team that's down one
person.

When setting up a group of this type, the GM will want to have some kind of
reason for the teams to be at odds with each other, even before character
creation. This will inform the players’ decisions and help them create
characters that are hooked into this central conflict.

It's also best for the GM to come up with some kind of end condition for the
scenario. It's all well and fine for the two groups to just have at each other,
but ultimately there needs to be breaking point. Set a time frame that makes
sense within the context of the scenario, such as 'three game days', and at
the end of the allotted time, after everyone has rolled for their Yo (and
you’ve rolled for their Woe), total up each side's Yo skulls (as well as the total
skulls you rolled for their Woe), and the side with the higher Yo wins. In the
case of a tie, the side with the lower Woe wins. If both Yo and Woe skulls are
tied, the GM can figure it out for their damned self.

Spooky con Carne

While the primary design goal of Spookybeans was to give the GM and players
a quick and easy conflict resolution system to mimic comic book stories, we
realize there are those who need a bit more crunch than the basic system
normally allows. The mechanics were developed with the idea of round robin
storytelling, the simple idea that while there is one narrator; each person at
the table will at some points have control of a scene. Once the spotlight
character (the one holding the ridiculous amount of dice in front of them) has
had their moment to shine, moving on the next person at the table with the
lowest amount of dice enforces a “Pass the Conch” approach to running the
game.

Thingies are one way of handling the need for more specifics in game. Some
players will use Thingies as a defensive ability such as “Big Fooking Gun!”, while
others may want to give themselves a boon “Big Man On Campus”, and still
others might just want to take something downright silly like “My Neighbor Is

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 A 50 Foot Gorilla”. Either way Thingies can give a tangible advantage for
their characters. This is a great help in trying to achieve your character’s
Yo (or doom you to your Woe) outcome, but ultimately they really don’t help
other players much. Of course, you can throw dice at them when they dance
like a circus monkey, or bribe you with cans of energy drinks, but in the end
your Thingies only help the character who has them on their character
sheet.

So let’s introduce you to two (completely optional) sub-rules that can add a
bit more cooperative play to your sessions. Honestly, you don’t always want
to see the suffering of your fellow player characters just so you can get
ahead in the game, right? Right? The two we speak of are Locations and
Relationships. Locations allow you to create a place (such as a house, coffee
shop, basement full of S&M equipment, etc.) that will benefit multiple players
when it comes up in game. Think of it like the Batcave. The next is
Relationships. Now don’t get fooled by the name… While you can have another
player become a significant other, you can also create a sidekick, an arch
nemesis, or an invisible friend (as long as someone else is playing it, then why
not?). By introducing these into your game you can give a larger range of
options and allow for stronger buy-in for extended stories.

Locations
Simply put, a Location is any place that the
characters will invest focus during a story.
A good example of this is in Jhonen
Vasquez’ JTHM comics. Johnny seemed
to live in a house that was not quite
the norm; the house was almost a
living entity which fed a good
amount of the plot. Another
good example of a Location
comes from a certain 1970’s
Saturday morning cartoon
featuring four pesky teens and
their talking dog, as they
traveled around in a van to solve
mysteries. Even though their
adventures took them to
different temporary locations,
they were never too far from
their van. While it is hoped that
the Location will become an
integral part of the
character’s continuing story,
it should not be used as a
crutch.

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 A Location can be created at the beginning of a story by each player
invested in the Location allocating one or more Thingies to it. Locations can
also be purchased during play by sacrificing a newly gained Thingy to start
the foundations of the Location. Location Thingies are no longer that of the
player’s who invested them, but now usable by anyone at the Location. Also
like a player character the new Location gets its own set of dice the players
can draw from. What does this all mean? Let’s have a look…

Location for the purposes of game is a communal player character. While no

one roleplays the Location as an actual character (unless it’s been decided
your Location has sentience, or perhaps is haunted), it does have its own set
of Thingies and rules. For each Thingy the player invests into the Location,
they can create one Thingy that belongs solely to the Location.

Example:
Lupo the Hobo-Samurai decides during character generation he wants to
have an armored shopping cart in which he carries all his possessions. While
the player could just take such an item as a personal Thingy, Lupo’s player
wants to have the cart available to his sidekick (and fellow player), Ronin Joe,
if there is ever a need. Lupo’s player gives his Location/cart the Thingies:
“Panzerfaust” and “Super Computer” (Lupo had found an old Apple II which he
believes in a crime solving mainframe).

These Thingies can now be used whenever players are at or near the
Location. Locations (like player characters) also have the benefit of their
own Stash of dice allocated to them. You may use these dice when activating a
Thingy belonging to a Location in addition to using a dice from your own pool.
While this sounds like a fantastic way to have an extra set of dice available to
you during play, there are a few drawbacks. First of all, your Location counts
as a player when the GM is totaling the number of dice they get to start,
giving them a better chance to rain on your parade. Second, you can only use
them IF the Location is part of the scene (in the example of Lupo’s cart
above, the cart must be directly part of the scene or no dice can be used).
Third, once Location dice are used in a Conflict, they are gone. A Location’s
Stash does not get replenished until after the story is over and Woe and Yo
is tallied.

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 Example:
Frankie Casanova, the greatest lover this side of the Hollow has taken the
old abandoned house of mirrors as his Location. He has invested in “Spinning
Disco Bed” and “Jukebox O’ Barry White Albums” as his two Thingies at this
Location. Frankie has a date with the flirtatious Barista who works over at
the Javasaurus. Wanting to add her to his list of conquests, he invites her
over for a night of energy drinks and vodka. After a few hours of his wit and
charm, Frankie decides to go in for the kill… smiling he hits a few buttons on
the jukebox and starts to sing along to “Can’t Get Enough of You Baby”.
Activating “Jukebox O’ Barry White Albums” he now gets to use the die from
the Location in addition to one of his own.

In the example, if Frankie tried to woo the Barista by simply telling her of his
spinning disco bed, or playing Barry White on the jukebox at the coffee shop
it would yield no extra bonus. Of course, if the Location is destroyed, stolen,
or one day just walks off into the sunset all dice and Thingies are lost.

Relationships
So we've talked about how you can turn a Location into an advantage for
your character; now let’s talk about turning other characters into an
advantage. We already know that you can create connections with NPCs by
taking them as Thingies. But now you can do the same thing with other Player
Characters as well! Isn't that great?

While your buddies are often a great help (stopping bullets by being placed in
front of you, holding elevator doors with their body parts, or taking that
murder rap), they have this nasty habit of trying to make you look silly to
gain that precious Yo. Relationships allow for the players to create
connections to other PCs, and use those connections to accomplish goals
much easier. It works in a similar way to Locations, but there are a few
caveats in place to keep everyone honest. So you might be thinking “Great, I
will make Bill’s character my good luck charm, so all I need to do is kill him and
drag around his corpse all the time!” This might make for a great subplot, but
all Bill’s character’s corpse is going to do is attract flies (and eventually, the
police).

Relationships are probably best chosen at the time of character creation.

Each player can choose another player’s character to define the
Relationship with, and there is no limit to the number of characters the
player can choose. The only rule is that you can only have one type of
Relationship with each PC in the game. In a nutshell, the Relationship is based
on one certain aspect of the character that another player enhances. This
can be anything from “Joey is my wingman, I never go to clubs without him” to

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 “Sandra and I were once international cat burglars.” What does this mean
mechanically? Whenever the other character is with you in a scene where
their relationship complements the situation, you can grab a die out of your
Stash for use in any Conflict that arises, just for them being there. So
where's the downside to this? Well, like in all relationships there is always
something about the other person that rubs you the wrong way. When you're
about the work of defining that Relationship, you will also need to choose a
negative side as well. When you are in a scene with the other character and
the situation brings out the negative, not only do you not get to grab that die
from your Stash, the player who is bringing out your bad side cannot give you
dice during that Conflict either.

Example:
El Jugo is a crime fighting vigilante who keeps his neighborhood clean of
ruffians and drug dealers. His best friend and companion Tortilla Slim has
worked with El Jugo for years on the Luchador circuit as a member of his
team. Needless to say when El Jugo is in a fight he can count on Tortilla Slim
for support. This means that just having Tortilla Slim there with him allows El
Jugo to grab a die from his Stash during Conflicts. Although they are best
friends and fight for Truth, Justice, and Chicken Mole, Tortilla Slim is
currently dating El Jugo’s ex-girlfriend Maria, for whom he still has a place in
his heart. If ever Tortilla Slim and Maria are together around El Jugo, he
must face whatever opposition comes his way on his own, and Tortilla Slim
cannot offer dice if he needs a boost.

Example:
Lana and Carol are amazing trapeze performers. They have traveled for
many years with the circus and finally managed to get a gig in Vegas.
Whenever Carol assists Lana in a performance, Lana gains the benefit of a
die from her Stash. However, Carol tends to get agitated whenever faced
with time constraints or being rushed, and this bugs the hell out of Lana.
When Carol is in one of her “moods”, Lana is basically on her own, and cannot
be aided by Carol’s player when the chips are down.

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 Flavor to Taste
While the default setting has a very modern urban theme, the concepts,
mechanics, and tone of the game can cross over nicely to other genres. In
essence, the game is about getting ahead by asking, “How bad do I want it, and
what will I do to get it?” These ideas are not exclusive to this genre, in many
stories we can usually see the protagonist end up battered and bruised just
to obtain the simplest of goals. Listed are some ideas to use the system for
different settings. We have included these optional themes to show the
flexibility of the mechanics and give some ideas for the game master who
wishes to pursue a different type of game.

Steampunk
Babbage engines, black smoke, airships, and steam-powered technology are
the heart of the Steampunk setting. Romps around the royal courts of
Europe, chasing down airship pirates over the Caribbean, or heading to the
Dakota Territories to mine for gold is what drives an adventurer.
Characters face action and adventure on a daily basis, fight off the
advances of evil brotherhoods, all the while keeping those Victorian
sensibilities in check. Character Concepts could include: Lords and Ladies of
High Society, Great White Hunter, Grease Monkey, Mad Scientist, Dashing
Soldier, Southern Belle, and Airship Pilot to name a few. Possible Thingies:
Giant Spanner Wrench, Clockwork Servant, Complicated Goggles, Pretentious
European Military Outfit, Handlebar Mustache, etc. The genre allows for a lot
of political intrigue, two-fisted pulp action, and globe trotting, perfect for
bizarre adventure in the age of Victoria.

They Came From Outer Spaaaaaaaaaaaaace

The Martians have landed! They need our women, precious metals, fast food
franchises, or a combination of all three in their evil plans for world
domination. The alien invasion theme is wide open to run games that are
serious, light hearted, or downright messy. Whether you are at the forefront
of the earth alliance, or one of the green skinned invaders; this genre has a
lot of roleplaying possibilities. Character concepts include: The Rough And
Tumble Soldier, The Haphazard Reporter, The Greaser With The Cool
Motorcycle, The Snarky Scientist, or the alien baddies themselves. Possible
Thingies for this genre could be: The Ray Gun, The Super-Mega Useful
Device-inator, Hazmat Suit, Hand Cannon, Tin Of Hair Wax, Rusty The Faithful
Dog (who seemingly gets killed early on, but comes back in the nick of time to
save our heroes, and everyone in the audience says “Awwwwww”). Don’t be
afraid to make your alien invasion the camp-fest it should be, anyway why
should we take little green men seriously?

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 Sword & Sorcery
It would not be a roleplaying game without a reference to the world’s most
popular RPG of all time. Speaking of Wizards, the system can be used to bring
the adventure of Swords and Sorcery into a night of play. Fierce Giants,
rabid Goblins, those weird tormented Elf creatures that Professor Tolkien
wrote about (and now everyone has them in their game). By plugging in the
right Concepts and Thingies you too can slaughter semi-civilized demi-humans
and take their wealth. Concepts could include: The Fighter, The Thief, The
Magic User, The Priest (starting to sound familiar?), or The Woodsman (just
to shake things up a bit). For those who really know the genre you could have
High Priest Of Ra, Knight Of The Holy Sword, Assassin Of The Unholy
Brotherhood, etc. Just because it is fantasy, no one said you have to
emulate that game. Thingies can get really creative in this genre as well… why
wield a sword when you can take The Star Sword Of Kathmyrr as your
Thingy? Depending on the tone you’re going for, Ouchies would likely take the
form of Complications and Injuries much more often than Humiliations.

All in all you and your GM should decide which sort of game you all want to play.
After all, roleplaying is a social hobby, not a dictatorship. While the GM may
think he is God, no deity can run a world if there is no one to inhabit it.

Go get ‘em,
champ!

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 Changing the Rules
We realize that no one system is going to work for everyone (if it did, there
wouldn't be so many different games on the market). At some point, you're
going to decide to house-rule something. The problem is, with big complex
systems, changing one rule ends up affecting a whole lot of other rules,
usually adversely.

Fortunately, we saw a way around all of that. It's clear that there aren't a
whole lot of moving parts to this system. In no way should that mean that the
system is limited. Quite the opposite, in fact. The various facets of the rules
do all interact with each other, but it's all on a level that someone can easily
understand. And understanding all those interactions is the important part.
When we designed the game, the way each mechanic works was decided upon
for very specific reasons. Nothing was arbitrary (certain things may have
started out that way, but were soon adjusted or changed as a result of the
effects they had on playtesting).

You can change the amount of dice people start

the game with, change how many Thingies they
get, impose rules on how and when they can
define those Thingies, change the way Yo and
Woe are defined, even drop bits of the system
completely or add totally new mechanics. Hey,
it's your game, you can do whatever you want
with it. It's not like we're going to come to your
house and break your legs if you change the
way the dice work. Just keep in mind that
every time you change an aspect of the
rules, it affects other aspects.

There's also a degree of diminishing

returns involved here. Eventually,
you're going to get to the point
where you've changed so many
rules that you're not even really
playing the same game any more.
Before you get to that point,
take a look around at the
industry, and see if maybe
there's another game out
there that might serve your
needs better, you might
save yourself some time
and energy unnecessarily
reinventing the wheel.

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 “Tour Guide”
Welcome new students to Votkatonick University, Over here is the statue of the university’s
I’m Greg, your tour guide, here to show you founder, Matthew Kensington... which has
around and point out some of the more unfortunately been recently defaced with
interesting sights around the historic campus. spray paint and a banana.

VERSITY CAMPUS TOUR VERSITY CAMPUS TOUR

Ha!

We’re getting close to the Chemistry Building, Here we are rounding the corner of the famous
and you know what that means, that’s right, Votkatonick Football Stadium, where the
science gone wild! You just never know what seniors have been hard at work on a mural...
those guys are gonna... whoops, that’s going to Alright, I’d just like to take this opportunity
leave a mark. I will say it is impressive to get all to apologize to all disabled people on behalf of
those windows to blow out simultaneously. the university, and I think we’re going to cut
the rest of the tour short at this point.
VERSITY CAMPUS TOUR VERSITY CAMPUS TOUR

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 Part 4: Stomping Ground
Lillianne: I'm so goth, whenever I walk into a room, the lights go out.
Vlad: I'm so goth, wherever I go people always ask me
to autograph boxes of Count Chocula.
Pauline: I'm so goth, I died and didn't notice.

Setting Overview
Welcome to The Hollow, home to wayward culture vultures, freaks, geeks, and
of course, Spookybeans. Since the early 19th century, this area was
dedicated to maintaining Slumber Hollow Memorial Gardens, one of The City's
oldest cemeteries. Many of the homes and buildings near this decaying
graveyard are reminiscent of the era in which they were constructed, most
of which were the shops of stonemasons, undertakers, and florists. The area
remained relatively free of life (quite literally) up until the early ‘50s, when
the baby-boomers started to build housing on every free patch of land. The
Hollow's heyday was in the early ‘60s, when the housing and tenements were
fairly new, and the area around the cemetery was considered suburbia, where
the posh middle class drove their polished cars and housewives conducted
neighborhood bake sales. The late ‘60s brought social and economic change,
and slowly the dynamic of the area changed along with it. The baby-boomers
began an exodus into the surrounding countryside (the very rich moving east
to The Hills), and more of the so-called riff-raff moved in. By 1974 the area
became a slum, and the only things to be found in The Hollow were the dead
and a collection of hookers, pimps, and junkies. The area remained relatively
unchanged through the ‘80s, and by the early ‘90s The Hollow was a gang-
driven war zone.

Then came the New Yuppies...

The Dot.com crowd found this dilapidated area quite charming, and came
running from miles around to buy up the lofts and old buildings to start up
their trendy stores and microbreweries of evil. A systematic crackdown on
gang activity in The Hollow on the part of the police force was one of the few
campaign promises actually kept by the mayor after the last election. Trendy
clothing shops opened their doors the public, franchised java shops started
to close down the old beatnik coffee houses and it was not long before
everyone had a Moondollars Grande cup in their hands. Of course, popularity
breeds counter-culture and with that, the yuppies' new Eden soon found
itself in competition with a series of goth clubs, piercing and tattoo
establishments, sex shops, alternative record stores, and the like. A new
sort of gang war had begun, but not in the conventional sense. It is now a
decade into the new millennium, and the glory days of the Dot.com are gone

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 like so much cheap stock. The streets of The
Hollow run rampant with counterculture, crime,
old hippies, and the last of the bitter yuppies
who could not afford to move out of the
neighborhood and now have to wipe the
thrown eggs off their SUVs in the
morning. Just another day in The
Hollow...

Life in Da Hood
Living next to a 200 year old
cemetery can have strange
effects on the mind. While most
are able to tune its presence
out, others can only sit and
contemplate what it truly
symbolizes. Outside its wrought
iron gates and hideous stone
gargoyles lies the broken
pavement of the postwar
dream. Graffiti and refuse
cover the walls and sidewalks,
and the loud noises of the city
can be heard crashing
through the limited silence at
all times of the day and night.
Homeless and drug addicts
crowd the soup lines and
missions looking for a hot meal,
the panhandlers sit on the
sidewalks with their huge “Will
work for...” signs, and the
drinkers of imported beer walk
the streets with the drinkers
of absinthe, trying not to look
each other in the eyes; a very
odd mix indeed. Life in The Hollow
is a constant test of one's grip on
reality.

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 Playing Spookybeans in The Hollow
Four scenarios are provided here, each one introducing a new region in or
around the Hollow. GMs who want to introduce a progressively larger game
setting can run these in any particular order, but it's probably best to go
with the order we've presented them here, as each one "unlocks" a new part
of The Hollow and surrounding locales. We’ve also got a collection of smaller
story ideas that can be thrown into any game to shake things up a bit.

We're all pretty

bizarre. Some of us are just
better at hiding it.

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bede rogerson (Order #4120245)
 Scenario #1: Going Out of Business
Introduction
The Euphorium, everyone's favorite one-stop shop for all things
hippie/goth/punk since 1973, is being forced to close their doors if they
can't come up with $50,000 in back rent. The store owners, Sunflower and
her husband Smokey, have been friends with the locals in The Hollow for a long
time, but people have been buying their music, clothes, games, and comics
online in ever-increasing numbers, and this small mom-and-pop store has
found it difficult to compete. Chad Bradley (the Euphorium's landlord and all-
around corporate dirtbag) sees this as an opportune time to kick out the
hippies and tear down the store to build a franchised yuppie watering hole
named after a day of the week with lots of crazy crap on the walls and
waiters that wear too many smarmy buttons on their suspenders. Sunflower
has three days to collect the cash or the store will be no more. Since the
Spookybeans are regulars in the shop, Sunflower asks them to help raise the
money to stay open.

Opposing the Spookybeans are the Yuppie Youth Organization, a preppy

right-wing high school club that torments the freaky kids on a daily basis, and
they will do everything they can to try and make it near impossible for them
to raise any money. The YYO is made up of all the preps, jocks, cheerleaders,
and wanna-bes and rich kids at Ross Perot high school.

Inspiration
PCU, The Blues Brothers, Happy Gilmore, Billy Madison, One Crazy Summer,
Better Off Dead, Revenge of the Nerds, basically any comedy based on the
formula of a group of misfits that has to work together to save something
they care about.

Game Setup
There are basically two ways to run this scenario:

• Straight: If you have a smaller group (say, 4 players or less), have them
all choose or create Spookybean characters, and run the YYO as NPCs.
• Head to Head: If you have a larger group (4 or more players), you can
split them into two groups, and have one side play the Spookybeans and
the other play the YYO. Try to balance the numbers. Note: The stats
given for the YYO are specifically for Head to Head. Feel free to ignore
them if running the game straight.

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 There are any number of ways to let the PCs find out about Sunflower's
predicament, but the easiest would be to simply cut to them hanging out at
the store, and Sunflower explaining the situation. Each of the Spookybeans
has a vested interest in keeping the store open, so the players should work
off of that. However, if the players decide to chuck the whole thing and let
the store get bulldozed, that's fine too, as long as what they end up doing
instead is entertaining. You can still use the YYO to make their lives
miserable.

Running the Game

• Play up the antagonism between the Spookybeans and the YYO; these are
two cliques that really hate each other. Each of the YYO characters has
it in for one of the Spookybeans.
• The scenario has a time limit of three game days. Shoot for 1 to 3 major
set pieces per day. Mainly, be sure to get each character involved in
something each day (preferably more).
• Insert an NPC into the group (or groups, as the case may be), it makes it
easier to provide guidance if necessary.
• Adversity is a direct measure of how much you want the characters to
fail. If things seem too easy for the players, roll more dice.
• Ouchies mean that Character Failure = Player Success. This is key.
• Let the players drive the story, but be prepared to take the reins back
if necessary.
• Let the players do whatever they want to further their agendas, even if
the whole town gets trashed in the process, because hey, it's funny.

Possible Hare-Brained Schemes

• Stage a wacky bank robbery/kidnapping.
• Challenge the YYO to some sort of competition.
• Hold a bake sale/car wash/benefit concert.
• When in doubt, blackmail them.

Possible Nefarious Plots

• Get rich & powerful parents to use their influence.
• Challenge the freaks to some sort of competition.
• Threaten their families.
• When in doubt, blackmail them.

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 Endgame
As the fundraising mayhem ensues, keep tabs on everyone’s Yo and Woe
scores. The endgame triggers are as follows:
• If running the scenario straight: If the group’s total Yo or Woe reaches
5, the scenario’s over.
• If running head to head: If either group’s total Yo reaches 5, the
scenario’s over.
• Alternately, if you run out of time, the scenario’s over.
• In any event, roll each character’s Yo vs. their Woe to determine where
they end up.

To determine the fate of the store:

• If running straight: Total up the Skulls rolled by each of the players for
their Yo, and compare it to the total Skulls rolled by the GM for
everyone’s Woe.
• If running head to head: Total the Skulls rolled by the campers for their
Yo, and compare it to the total Skulls rolled by the camp staff for their
Yo.
• If the winners beat the losers on the big board, the freaks have earned
enough cash, and the Euphorium is saved! If not, well...

Places to Go
The downtown area of the neighborhood commonly known as The Hollow is a
semi-suburban area comprised of about about 12 square blocks. An eclectic
mixture of Greenwich Village, Haight-Ashbury, and the very worst aspects of
American suburbia, it is situated near the cemetery after which it was named,
Slumber Hollow Memorial Gardens, one of the oldest cemeteries in The City.
To the north is The Highway, beyond which is The Mall. To the south is an
elevated commuter train, beyond which is The Votkatonick University campus.
To the west is The River (across which is The City). East of the cemetery is
The Heights, where all the rich people live. Here are some the sights to see
when you head downtown.

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 Slumber Hollow Memorial Gardens: This sprawling
cemetery was built at the turn of the 19th century
(the gate was constructed in 1801, but the surrounding
wall wasn't completed until 1813). Some of The City's
greatest historical figures are laid to rest here, and
every once in a while, they'll get up and walk around for
a bit.

Javasaurus Rex: This is the newest in the line of pseudo

counter-culture coffee shops. Javasaurus Rex offers
over 100 flavors of coffees, teas, espressos, and
smart beverages. There’s a full-blown bakery in the
back, and free wireless internet access. It's the only
real competition Moondollars has had in this town for
nearly 5 years now.

The Keeper's Den: Need new dice for that special gaming
event? New splat book for Fish Hook: The Baiting? Can't
get enough of those War Hippie minis? Well, look no
further! The Keeper’s Den is your one-stop shop for all
things geeky. Scathing nerd sarcasm and elitist disdain
offered with every purchase, at no extra cost. Come on
down every Friday for our sanctioned Serial Killer CCG
tourneys.

Zippy Mart: No one can beat the Zippy Mart, open all
night long and stocked with your favorite junk food and
a full deli. You can buy chips, chili dogs, cheese-in-a-can,
sandwiches, and a 24-pack of beer all in one stop. While
you're there, gulp down a frozen Flippy drink,
guaranteed to give you brain freeze in less than 6
seconds or you get another free.

Berzerkoid: Built in the mid 80s, this arcade has not

changed much through the times; even the games are
still the same. Enjoy classics such as Dig Doug, Q-Brat,
Marital Kombat, and Donkey Punch. Ask about a
Berzerkoid birthday party and the “Bucket O Tokens”.

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 Market Square: The heart of downtown, and the site of
the infamous 1969 Tea Cozy Riots. The fountain in the
center hasn't worked properly in 23 years, ever since a
local prankster gained some small amount of notoriety
in local news by rigging the thing to spew pea soup for
nearly 3 days straight.

Riverside Park: Once the city planners had finished all

the zoning for The Hollow back in the late 40s, they
found they had a strip of unusable land on the west side,
running along the river. So they turned it into a park,
and got a big fat tax break. Across the river is The
City proper.

Ross Perot High School: The PCs are all teenagers, so

this is where you'll find them from 8am to 3pm every
weekday. The place looks like a prison, and it was
designed with much of the same concerns in mind. Go
Pachyderms!

Apocalypse Burger: Home of the Myocardial Infarction,

Five pounds of ground beef, with lettuce, tomato,
mushrooms, onions, bacon, and your choice of cheese, all
stacked between a pair of glazed donuts in lieu of a bun.
Deep fried optional. If you can finish it in one sitting and
keep it all down, you get another one free. Of course,
there are also the more pedestrian quarter- and half-
pound burgers for the mere mortals to enjoy.

And of course, there’s The Euphorium as well.

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 9

2 5 3

10

Map Key
1. Slumber Hollow
2. Javasaurus Rex
3. The Keeper’s Den
4. Zippy Mart
5. Berzerkoid
6. Market Square 8
7. Riverside Park
8. Ross Perot High School
9. Apocalypse Burger
10. The Euphorium

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 People to Be
The NPCs: At the center of this little drama are three people. Chad wants
either the back rent, or the Euphorium demolished. Ultimately, he doesn’t
really care which outcome transpires, but bulldozing the store does further
his other business goals. Smokey and Sunflower obviously want to keep the
store, as it’s their livelihood.

Chad Bradley is the president of Bradley Real Estate Ventures, LLC. Always
dressed like he's ready to go play tennis. Has a really bad hairpiece. Chad is
always out for the quick buck, and he doesn't care if the little guy gets
squished. He once bulldozed an orphanage to clear enough land to build a
cigarette factory. He would have put the orphans to work there if he
thought he could have gotten away with it.

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 Arianna “Sunflower” Martin-Lindenberg is the manager of the Euphorium.
Sunflower is so open-minded that her brain is in danger of falling out, and so
concerned with being politically correct that it often seriously hampers her
ability to communicate effectively. Also, she is a strict vegan, and lays on the
guilt trip for anyone who isn't.

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 Harold “Smokey” Lindenberg is the owner of the Euphorium, and Sunflower’s
husband. A receding hairline hasn't deterred him from wearing his hair long,
and he is in a constant haze from years of chemical experimentation. The
drugs haven't helped his paranoia any, either. In some ways, Smokey is still
dodging the draft, and probably always will be.

The PCs: Now we’ve been extra nice to you all, and included a plethora of
lovely pregenerated characters, but if none of them seem particularly
inspiring to your players, they can create their own, just keep the following
guidelines in mind:

• The characters should all be of high school age (~14-17), either on the
side of the freaks or the preppies.
• Each of the characters should have a motivation for saving the
Euphorium (or seeing it destroyed).

On to the characters...

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 The Spookybeans
Name: Edgar Allen Ravenspoe
Concept: Mopey Goth Artist
Thingies (1 left):
• Can Draw Anything
• Huge CD Collection
Yo (1): Goes on to publish a successful underground
goth comic.
Woe (1): Ends up selling out to the Corporate
Machine and working in advertising.
Notes: Edgar sometimes comes off as a bit of a wet
blanket, but he is better than anyone around when
it comes to anything artistic. He relies on the
Euphorium for his regular comics fix.

Name: Lillianne St. James

Concept: Surly Goth Princess
Thingies (1 left):
• Daddy’s Got More Money Than God
• Terminal Irritability
Yo (1): Starts her own records company.
Woe (1): Daddy cuts up her credit cards.
Notes: Lil doesn't want all that much. She just
wants it all. The Euphorium boasts a selection of
spooky jewelry that's second to none.

Name: Droo MacFarlane

Concept: Manic Culture Vulture
Thingies (1 left):
• Video Game Guru
• Stompy Dance
Yo (1): Gets a job playtesting PS4 games.
Woe (1): Inadvertently opens a portal to Hell.
Notes: Droo is a nice guy, he's just a little... off.
He’s good at solving puzzles. Against Sunflower's
better judgement, the Euphorium stocks the latest
PC & console games.

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 Name: Larry Andrews
Concept: Rivethead
Thingies (1 left):
• Rant Incoherently
• Boot To The Head
Yo (1): Becomes a roadies for The Nihilistics
Woe (1): Tries to stage dive,,, and no one catches
him. Crunch!
Notes: Larry is pissed off. At everyone. All the
time. The Euphorium provides him with all the latest
inside info on the underground angry white boy
music scene.

Name: Nikki Robinson

Concept: Wylde Chylde
Thingies (1 left):
• I Rule The Mosh Pit
• Hairspray & Lighter
Yo (1): Starts her own grrlpunk band, which totally
rocks their first gig.
Woe (1): Chained to the perfume desk at Jacy's.
Notes: My girl likes to party all the time, party all
the time, party all the time... Nikki has a definite
problem with authority. She gets all her punk rawk
clothes and hair dye from the Euphorium.

Name: Cameron Johansen

Concept: Hacker Supreme
Thingies (1 left):
• My Kung Foo Is The Best
• Alienware Laptop
Yo (1): Makes a small fortune developing a hot new
gaming app for BookFace. I READ
YOUR

Woe (1): Gets taken down by the FBI for credit EMAIL

card fraud.
Notes: Cameron is the best at what he does. He
doesn't venture outside much, except to fuel his
ever-present need for caffeine. The Euphorium is
the only place in town that sells Bawls by the case.

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 The Yuppie Youth Organization
Name: Ana Bradley
Concept: Chronic Overachiever
Thingies (1 left):
• On The Fast Track To Harvard
• Flip Out
Yo (1): Gives a rousing Valedictory speech at her
graduation.
Woe (1): Her addiction to diet pills leads to an
embarrassing episode of Intervention.
Notes: Chad Bradley's daughter. Class President
and Chairperson of the YYO. She will do anything to
gain her father's approval. As the bane of Ana’s
existence, Larry is the antithesis of everything
she stands for.

Name: Pierce Worthington III

Concept: Young Republican
Thingies (1 left):
• Professional Brown-noser
• Machiavellian Schemer
Yo (1): Ends up as a Presidential Cabinet member
Woe (1): “Breaking News: OmniCorp CEO Pierce
Worthington III convicted of fraud and
conspiracy..."
Notes: The power behind the throne. He put Ana in
charge of the YYO to draw attention away from
himself. Pierce has a particular dislike for Edgar.

Name: Brock Thompson

Concept: Linebacker
Thingies (1 left):
• Kill The Guy With The Ball
• Walk It Off
Yo (1): "Brock, you just won the Super Bowl!! What
are you gonna do next?!"
Woe (1): Ends up at his father's used car
dealership, winding back odometers.
Notes: As Pierce's personal hired goon, Brock does
wherever Pierce says, which usually involves
pounding on people. Brock is especially well known
for his patented "Stuff Droo in the Locker"
routine.

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 Name: Summer Johansen
Concept: Head Cheerleader
Thingies (1 left):
• Indomitable Optimism
• Double-Jointed
Yo (1): Gets crowned Homecoming Queen at the
Senior Prom.
Woe (1): A string of violent altercations on the
Jerry Springer show. Yes, more than one occasion.
Notes: As Brock's on-again, off-again girlfriend,
Summer breaks up and makes up with him several
times a week. She's also Cameron's sister.

Name: Victoria Prescott

Concept: The Meanest Girl In School
Thingies (1 left):
• I Always Get What I Want
• Scathing Sarcasm
Yo (1): Inherits the family fortune.
Woe (1): Gets written out of the will.
Notes: Pierce's girlfriend. She delights in causing
pain and suffering in others. Victoria and Lillianne
used to be the best of friends up until 8th grade,
and then social pressure drove them into different
camps.

Name: Brandi, Mandi, Candi, & Claire

Concept: Cheerleader Bunnies
Thingies (1 left):
• Hive Mind
• Impeccable Choreography
Yo (1): They win the grand prize in next year's
National Cheerleading Competition.
Woe (1): Stretch marks and meternity pants.
Notes: Between the four of them, they might just
have enough brains and personality to add up to
one whole person. Rumors that Nikki used to be one
of them are completely unfounded. Totally.

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bede rogerson (Order #4120245)
 Scenario #2: Dave of the Dead
Introduction
Something has gone horribly horribly wrong, and now the dead have risen and
are invading The Hollow with an insatiable hunger for the flesh of the living!
Now, the future of humanity rests in the hands of a man with a borderline
psychotic personality disorder...

And a chainsaw.

Can the PCs figure out what caused the outbreak, and how to stop it? Hell,
can they just manage to survive? On the other hand, is being a zombie really
so bad?

Inspiration
You're kidding, right? Zombie movies. Duh. Okay, here goes: This scenario
draws most heavily from the less serious zombie flicks out there, so start
with Shaun of the Dead, Fido, Zombieland, Return of the Living Dead (and
sequels), Undead, and the Evil Dead trilogy. From there, you can move on to
the classic stuff like Night of the Living Dead (and sequels), 28 Days Later &
28 Weeks Later, and Dawn of the Dead (the 2004 remake).

Game Setup
You can start the PCs off pretty much anywhere, but it's usually best to
have them grouped together fairly closely. On the other hand, there's
nothing like running from zombies to make people band together. It's probably
best to set up the particulars of the zombies beforehand, but if a more
interesting or amusing alternative pops up, don't be afraid to run with it
instead.

Zombies 101
There are a couple of things that should probably be worked out beforehand,
as there's lots of different way to play this scenario. As far as the game is
concerned, there is no difference in game mechanics, so the questions
presented here are merely issues of personal preference.

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 1. What Flavor? One of the first things that needs to be determined is what
kind of zombies you want. Zombies basically come in 2 types:
• Classic: These are the shambling ghouls popularized by Night of the
Living Dead. They've clawed their way out of their graves, and are in
varying states of decay. Rigor mortis limits their movements, and
they tend to stagger a lot. Strictly speaking, it's usually possible to
run right past them, so the main dangers here are allowing your
personal prejudices to prevent you from working with your fellow
survivors to fight the zombies, and allowing them to surround you.
• New and Improved: These are the fast-moving zombies you'll find in
newer flicks like 28 Days Later. In addition to the dangers listed
above, there's also the fact that they can move as fast as you. The
main source of drama here is that technically, these zombies you’re
mowing down aren’t dead, they’re just regular people who got sick
with some kind of super-rabies. So... yeah.
• A third option is to mix the two; newly dead will move faster and be
more agile, while those who've been in the ground for a while will tend
to be less flexible and more crusty. Either type may also possess
the ability to work together, and it's up to you to decide if they can
talk or not. One constant seems to be that they will do anything to
overwhelm any living humans and attempt to feed on their flesh.
Victims will often become zombies themselves, if there's enough left
afterwards.

2. What caused it? What happened that caused the dead to rise? Some
possibilities:
• Virus: Secret government lab was working on a way to create super-
soldiers, and it got out somehow.
• Supernatural: Forbidden rites conducted in an ancient crypt
beneath an abandoned cathedral. Or something.
• Radiation: Comet passing through the atmosphere, spreading epsilon
radiation and tachyon waves.
• Who Cares? Let's smash some heads!

3. How does it spread? What does it take to turn you into the walking
undead? Is a bite sufficient? Blood contact? Or will anyone who dies be a
candidate for zombiehood, regardless of cause?

4. How long does it take? Minutes, hours, days? Of course, the proper
answer here is “whatever the story requires.” Basically, anyone who's
slated to turn will do so at the worst possible moment.

5. Is there a cure? Blood transfusion from someone who seems to be

immune? Wait for the comet to leave Earth's atmosphere? Kill the ‘Head
Zombie’? Destroy the evil amulet? Speak the magical incantation (make
sure you pronounce the words properly, now!)?

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 6. How do you kill them? The standard here is of course a solid blow to the
head (either with firearms or a blunt object), or decapitation. Fire and
electrocution might also work, and dismemberment will slow them down at
least. As an alternative, maybe you can’t kill what’s already dead, and the
only option is to run.

Running the Game

Some things to keep in mind that might help make running the game a little
easier:
• If you’ve set the game first few days of the outbreak, many characters
will still be in denial about the nature of the threat. However, this can get
old really quick, so be sure to drive home the fact that these are not
simply goddamn hippies, they are The Freaking Walking Undead, and They
are Going to Kill You. If the setting is any more than a week in, the PCs
really have no excuse. Just get out there and start swinging.
• A big part of the fun of zombie invasions is all the inter-PC conflict that
arises from their inability to work together. Play up the disparities
between PCs.
• Some classic zombie tropes to throw in: “There’s too many of them!”,
Lost in the Cemetery, “The Apocalypse Burger is under siege!”, “We’ve
got to make it to (the hospital/the mall/the train/whatever)!”, “Fred got
bit, he’s not looking too good!”
• Adversity a direct measure of how much you want the characters to fail.
If things seem to easy for the players, roll more dice.
• Ouchies mean that Character Failure = Player Success. This is key.
• Let the players drive the story, but be prepared to take the reins back
if necessary.
• Don't be afraid to say No if a player is trying to do something stupid
(unless it's also something funny).
• Let the players do whatever they want to try to stop/contain the
zombie menace, even if the whole town gets trashed in the process,
because hey, it's funny.

Endgame
After letting the zombies (and the PCs) run rampant for a while, at some
point there will have to be some way of turning the tide. The choices you made
when setting up the zombies will usually point the way. The main idea is to end
on a bang, or at least some kind of humorous twist. At the end, roll each
character’s Yo vs. their Woe to determine where they end up.

Places to Go
This scenario expands on the Hollow a bit, to include the area surrounding the
cemetery. All the locations listed in the first scenario are also still there
(unless they were destroyed in the process of attempting to save the
Euphorium), and there are some new locations in which to rampage.

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 The Mall: What would a zombie attack be without a mall,
modern suburbia's answer to the walled castle? This
gigantic monument to unchecked consumerism was built
about 10 years ago, and like the Winchester Mansion,
has since continued to grow, possibly on its own,
spontaneously sprouting two or three new shops every
season. The Food Court is on the 2nd floor, and there
are autonomous snacking establishments scattered
throughout the rest of the complex. There are three
large department stores, and a Sprawlmart has
grafted itself onto the north wing like a gigantic
concrete tick. Due to contractual obligation, there are
no less than ten Moondollars outlets.

Sacred Heart Hospital: Sacred Heart was built in 1977,

when the old municipal hospital closed down. Somewhere
along the line, someone got the idea that the
ambulances would be more noticeable if they were
painted neon colors, in addition to sporting the usual
loud sirens. If the group takes casualties, this will be a
likely stop to stock up on medical supplies.

The Tool Box: Perhaps going on the offensive is the

answer. The Tool Box offers the latest and greatest: all
your hardware & home improvement needs under one
extremely large roof. The aisles are numbered and have
GPS readings posted to keep customers from getting
lost, and a shuttle bus makes a circuit around the inside
perimeter of the store every half hour (when there’s
not a zombie apocalypse going, that is). Open 24 hours.

Shop & Stock: America's favorite shopping chain since

1973, with over 100 friendly stock boys ready to put
something on the shelves as soon as you need it. Bring
the family down for free balloons and our special
expiration date table where you SAVE, SAVE, SAVE!
And remember our slogan… “If we don't have it, you
don't need it!”

Votkatonick University: If the cause of the outbreak

seems to be supernatural in nature, perhaps the
answers can be found in the arcane lore library.

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 12

17

11
11
11

4 9 13

5 3
2 1
6
7
10

14

Map Key
1. Slumber Hollow
15 2. Javasaurus Rex
3. The Keeper’s Den
4. Zippy Mart
5. Berzerkoid
6. Market Square
7. Riverside Park
8. Ross Perot High School
18
9. Apocalypse Burger
10. The Euphorium
11. Apartment Buildings 16
12. The Mall
13. Sacred Heart Hospital
14. The Tool Box
15. Shop & Stock
16. Votkatonick University
17. The Highway
18. The Elevated Train

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 People to Be
NPCs: The easiest way to present that ever-present atmosphere of lethality
that’s so common to zombie stories, it’s best to have a constant stream of
characters that you can trot out and promptly offer up to the ravening
hordes. The sidebar over there provides a handy list of ready-made victims.
Just check 'em off when they get eaten, then cross 'em off when they get splatted. If
you need more, just look around your neighborhood for descriptions to steal.

The One They Called... Dave: The man of the hour. Dave used to be a regular
joe, until one day, everything got to be too much, and he just… snapped.

Chainsaw Dave is not so much a character as a force of nature. His origins

remain a mystery, but his destiny is clear: When the dead walk the earth, he
will lead the way to safety, leaving a sea of dismembered bodies in his wake. He
will tread the jeweled thrones of Hyboria beneath his sandalled feet, and is
destined to wear the crown of Aquilonia upon a troubled - no wait, that's
someone else. Never mind.

The best thing is to

have Dave show up
just when the PCs
are about to be GR
overwhelmed, and IND
MA
ST
clear a path for them
to escape. The only
problem is that the
ER
longer he sticks around,
the more trouble he causes,
because that chainsaw is loud.
He can be played any number of
ways, but however you do it, he
should always be absolutely nuts.
Whether that means being a silent stalker
who lets the chainsaw do the talking, or if he
babbles constantly like the Evil Midnight
Bomber What Bombs At Midnight, or if he is
blessed with mindless courage, charging
into battle against insurmountable odds
is entirely up to you.

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 The PCs: Now we’ve been extra nice to you all,
and included a plethora of lovely pregenerated Generic
characters, but if none of them seem
particularly inspiring to your players, they can Victims/Zombies
create their own, just keep the following q Dirty Old Man
guidelines in mind: q Little Old Lady
q Doctor
• The characters should all be people who q Lawyer
q Business Executive
will be interesting or amusing to play in a
q Little Girl
tongue-in-cheek parody of a q Teen Reprobate
horror/survival situation. q Bald Muscleman
• The characters should ideally include some q Homeless Guy
biases or conflicts against each other. q Hot Chick
q Surfer Dude
On to the characters... q Blue Collar Worker
q Good Ol' Boy
q Fat Biker
q Cop
q Nurse
q Computer Geek
q Hot Dog Vendor
q Heavy Metal Rocker
q Football Jock
q Cheerleader
q Freaky Goth Kid
q Soccer Mom
q Young Republican
q Strung-out Junkie
q Frat Boy
q Drunk Dude
q Reality TV Star
q Stodgy Professor
q High School PE Coach
q Naked Guy. Now it’s a party!

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 Name: Wes Andrews
Concept: The Slacker
Thingies (1 left):
• Employee Discount
• The WesMobile (1979 Toyota Hatchback)
Yo (1): A work-related accident gets him 6 months
on the sofa playing video games, thanks to
Worker's Comp.
Woe (1): Has to move out of his parents' house and
get a real place.
Notes: Wes is 33 and lives in his parents' basement.
He is currently employed at The Tool Box (although
to say that he works there would be stretching the
truth a bit).

Name: Amanda Hatori

Concept: The Office Worker
Thingies (1 left):
• Fearsome Organizational Skills
• Repressed Hostility
Yo (1): Hello, promotion! Time to move out of that
cubicle and into a real office with a window.
Woe (1): Buried in a 6-month backlog of paperwork.
Notes: Amanda was on her way to a Tarantino film
festival when the zombies attacked. Maybe the
stress of the current situation will help her tap
into something primal.

Name: Burnout
Concept: The Biker
Thingies (1 left):
• Ride To Live, Live To Ride
• Looking For A Fight
Yo (1): Crashes his bike into the giant turkey float,
disrupting the Jacys’ Thanksgiving Parade.
Woe (1): Total wipeout on the highway puts him in
traction for nine weeks.
Notes: Burnout has had his fair share of run-ins
with the law. He's going to take advantage of the
recent situation to crack some skulls. And steal
some TVs. Has a strong dislike of any vehicle with
more than two wheels.

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 Name: Mac Malone
Concept: The Gun Nut
Thingies (1 left):
• Special Forces (retired)
• Still Gets Flashbacks
Yo (1): Ah, time to head out into the wilderness, get
back to nature... and blow its face off.
Woe (1): Learns the true definition of horror when
he wanders into a gun control rally accidentally.
Notes: Mac was there, man, RIGHT THERE on the
front lines when it all went to hell, man. There's
nothing in the world like that burning gasoline smell.
Smells like... Victory.

Name: Maureen Rosenberg

Concept: The Soccer Mom
Thingies (1 left):
• The Voice of DOOM
• Purse of Many Things
Yo (1): Finally gets some peace and quiet. Calgon,
take me away...
Woe (1): Yet another migraine. Ow Ow OW.
Notes: "No, put that down, you don't know where it's
been. And don't you DARE fling that potato salad at
your sister, I am just about on my last nerve, and I
have had it up to HERE with you!!"

Name: Officer Yvonne Jackson

Concept: The Street Cop
Thingies (1 left):
• Don’t Lose Your Cool
• Let’s Bust Some Heads
Yo (1): Youngest cop in the precinct to make
Lieutenant.
Woe (1): Busted down to meter-maid.
Notes: It's hard to keep the peace on the streets
when they're being overrun by the walking undead.
Yvonne has had just about enough tomfoolery from
all these reprobates.

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 Name: Father James MacDermott
Concept: The Preacher
Thingies (1 left):
• On A Mission From God
• Mean Left Hook
Yo (1): A freak rain of frogs sparks a marked
increase in the weekly tithes and offerings.
Woe (1): Gets stuck running Bingo night every week
for the next three years.
Notes: The End Times are upon us, and Father
MacDermott has been preparing for this. He knows
that he probably won’t survive, but he’s going to
make sure he takes as many of those godless
bastards with him as he can.

Name: Laura Robinson

Concept: The Veterinarian
Thingies (1 left):
• Lots of Sharp Implements
• Used to Handling Tempermental Patients
Yo (1): Gets promoted, works the front desk
exclusively.
Woe (1): A future of St. Bernards in desperate
need of baths. And breath mints.
Notes: The recent emergency has left the town in
clear need of anyone with medical expertise.
Unfortunately, all of Laura’s training was in canine
and feline medicine.

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 GRINDMAS
TER

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 Scenario #3: The World of Insufficient Light
Introduction
The Hollow has always been a magnet for all kinds of supernatural weirdness,
and there's no place more magnetic than Votkatonick University. But it
seems now things are finally coming to a head.

Okay, so you've got to fight an ancient menace from another dimension, avert
the Apocalypse, make out with your vampire boyfriend, and find time to study
for mid-terms! What's a demon slayer to do?

Inspiration
Buffy/Angel, Twilight, True Blood, Vampire Diaries, Charmed, Teen Wolf, any
drama on the CW, White Wolf RPGs, Cthulhu mythos stuff.

Game Setup
In additon to all the usual oddities at VU, a recent development is garnering a
lot of attention amongst the students: a love triangle involving a local girl,
Beryl, and her two would-be paramours; Edwin, a vampire, and Jack, a
werewolf. The PCs are all at least acquaintances of Beryl, and she’s looking to
her friends for guidance. The PCs should each have a reason for siding with
either Team Edwin or Team Jack.

Running the Game

Some things to keep in mind that might help make running the game a little
easier:
• Get each player to give a reason why they would side with either Edwin or
Jack. This will help direct their actions during the course of the
scenario. If they don’t like either one, find out which one they hate less.
• Each character’s supernatural qualities should provide ample
opportunities for making their lives difficult.
• Adversity is a direct measure of how much you want the characters to
fail. If things seem too easy for the players, roll more dice.
• Ouchies mean that Character Failure = Player Success. This is key.
• Let the players drive the story, but be prepared to take the reins back
if necessary.
• Don't be afraid to say No if a player is trying to do something stupid
(unless it's also something funny).
• Let the players do whatever they want, even if the whole town gets
trashed in the process, because hey, it's funny.

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 Endgame
As Team Edwin and Team Jack each try to give Beryl useful advice, keep tabs
on everyone’s Yo and Woe scores. If either group’s total Yo reaches 5, the
scenario’s over. Alternately, if you run out of time, the scenario’s over (duh).
In any event, roll each character’s Yo vs. their Woe to determine where they
each end up. To determine what Beryl finally decides, total the Skulls rolled by
each group for their Yo, and compare. If it’s a tie, Beryl can’t make up her
mind, paving the way for a sequel.

Welcome to Votkatonick University

The University was founded in 1756, and named after the Votkatonick River,
which is located just to the west of the campus. It is a commonly held belief
that the river itself was named in 1683 by English explorer Joseph
Ambrose Sutton, who claimed that "when viewed from the
surrounding valley in the late afternoon, the colour
of the water as it was touched by the last
rays of the setting sun reminded him of a
vodka tonic." Most historians will claim
that this account is apocryphal, as
the vodka tonic did not become a
popular mixed drink until many
years later, and that the name is
likely a derivative of the
Vatketong, a tribe of Native
Americans believed to have
inhabited the region some 100
years previous. However, it is
significant to note that the
river bed was later discovered
to contain scattered deposits
of naturally occurring quinine,
and has at times been known to
spontaneously fluoresce in the
presence of ultraviolet light.
The University's founder,
Matthew Kensington, was a
textile merchant from Liverpool,
though it is rumored that he
made the majority of his fortune
via piracy in his earlier years.
However it was earned,
Kensington's massive estate
formed the backbone of the
University's financial support.

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 Places to Go
The Votkatonick University campus is located just to the south of The
Hollow, past the elevated train tracks.
1. The Votkatonick River: The City is located on the other side, off to the
west.
2. The Elevated Commuter Railroad provides easy access for students
without their own transportation.
3. The Quad is a popular hangout spot for all the cool kids.
4. The Visitor's Center is a combination information center and gift shop.
5. You never know when you might need some holy water, so stop by The
Chapel.
6. The Clock Tower provides a commanding view of the entire campus.
7. Administrative Offices: All the bureaucratic red tape you could want.
8. The Business Administration Department: Proudly nurturing the next
generation of bank executives.
9. The Computer Lab: Graduate students working on their theses. Shh!
10. Applied Sciences Department: Unlicensed particle accelerators and vast
quantities of alcohol. What could go wrong?
11. Gymnasium: Physical Education mostly consists of few basketball hoops,
and the Holding Up The Wall Club.
12. Lecture Hall A: Foreign Language Studies and other miscellaneous
subjects.
13. Lecture Hall B: Pre-Med, Pre-Law, Pre-Cooked.
14. Lecture Hall C: For students that aren’t really serious about studying.
15. Student Activity Center: Ping pong, vending machines, and weekly
Warhamster campaigns.
16. History Department: The professors are as dusty as the subjects.
17. Arcane Studies Department: Not for the faint of heart. Or stomache.
18. The Gazebo is the perfect spot for ridiculous romantic overtures, or
the birthplace of restraining orders.
19. The Library: Only 3 people have entered since 1903, and none of them
have ever been seen again.
20. The Art Department: Producing horrible portraits of naked people and
bowls of fruit since 1965.
21. Football Stadium: Built in 1953. Go Fighting Cephalopods!
22. The Boathouse provides equipment storage for the rowing team and the
Wine & Cheese Yacht Club.
23. Point Lookout Lighthouse is currently #1 on Campus Security’s Date
Rape Statistics by Location brochure.
24. The safe books (the ones that don’t need to chained down) are kept at
The 'New' Library (annexed 1916).
25. The Chemistry Lab was built in 1937, and then rebuilt in 1966 and 1979.
When will the next explosion occur?
26. Productions of Shakespeare, Gilbert & Sullivan, and The King in Yellow
are featured at The Amphitheatre.

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 Just south of the campus proper, another small suburban area has sprung
up, with all kinds of neat places for students to waste time between classes.

Suds & Spins: Nothing can be more fun than washing

your clothes at the Suds & Spins, where the music and

& rinse cycles never end. With our patented Juke

Washers, the technology of digital MP3 players and
washing machines combine, allowing you to wash your
clothes to your favorite tunes.

The Violet Eye: Witches and Voodoo priests, look no

further for your metaphysical needs. The Violet Eye
has it all: high quality graveyard dust, black cat bones,
or marvel at our collection of tarot cards and spell
books. Something for everyone, and Tuesdays are our
Faith of the Week day, where we give a 15% discount to
our special people.

SPANK: Chains, whips, and leather straps are just some

of the unique fashion pieces you'll find here. SPANK has
all your sex toy needs in a huge emporium of wall-to-wall
fetishy goodness. Need something for the freak that
has everything, or just out for a night of kinky
consensual adult fun? It’s all here. 21+ ONLY.

Kit Shickers: Well howdy y’all! Kick off your shoes and
ride the mechanical bull for a boot stompin' good time!
Kit Shicker's is a playground for the hard drivin' blue-
collar worker, with good drink, food, and lots of line
dancing for all you good-ole-boys. Every Friday is our
“You might be a hillbilly” night with the comedy stylings
of Red Skillet.

Lenore’s Demise: Twirl and sway the night away to the

haunting tunes and driving industrial beats of the
Hollow's alternative scene. Since 1985, Lenore's Demise
has been at the forefront of the Goth & Industrial
scene with full bar, black candle lounge and brooding
suite. Tuesday is 1/2 off ladies' drinks, Friday is wine
and cheese night, and Sunday DJ Chippy Syn spins the
best of the 80's and 90's.

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 Drill Bitz: Feeling the need for instant rebellion, or
possibly just the need to look young and trendy? Drill
Bitz has your answer. Come look though our many books
of the most creative and possibly painful tattoos and
piercings located under one roof, and we’ll have you
looking like a top rate culture vulture in no time.

PeePee Sanchez: What a concept! A Mexican juice bar

and restaurant run by masked luchadores. The only
place in town one can get a taco, guava smoothie, and
watch an all-out brutal wrestling match. Quien es mas
macho?

Yakuza Danny’s: If you don't mind the regulars tugging

their sleeves down to hide the tattoos, Yakuza Danny’s
has charm and interesting atmosphere. Set in the
middle of a basement billiards hall, this diner has the
best sashimi and veggie tempura in town.

Westhill: The Westhill Psychiatric and Mental Health

Institute was originally a satellite office of Sacred
Heart Hospital, the Intstitute won their independence in
a revolution drenched in red tape in 1991. Now the
institute plays host to many Votkatonick graduate
students (some even as interns).

It’s a college campus. Of course there’s a Zippy Mart

here, silly!

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 9
2
11

25
7

8 10

6 3
12
4

13
26
1
5
14
15
20
19

22 16

17
21
23
18

&

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 People to Be
The NPCs: A small whirlwind of drama has recently occurred on campus, as a
local girl, Beryl, has captured the attention of both Edwin, a vampire, and
Jack, a werewolf. Edwin and Jack have been vying for Beryl's affections ever
since.

Beryl is a socially awkward, but uncommonly attractive, teenage girl who has
just started her freshman year at Votkatonick U. She is a bit clumsy, and
has a penchant for emotional manipulation. She’s a bit torn between Edwin,
who represents everything she’s always longed for in a relationship, and
Jack, who offers the promise of a slightly more normal social life, and whose
animal magnetism is hard to ignore, especially in enclosed spaces.

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 Edwin is the newcomer to the campus, having recently transferred from
somewhere out northwest. He’s polite, well-educated, and well, immortal. He's
promised to show Beryl things she's never dreamed of, but he's steadfastly
refused to make her a vampire, because it's oh such a curse to be saddled
with this much awesome. He can get a little obsessive, and has been known to
engage in behavior that would get him arrested in real life, but wouldn’t seem
at all out of place in a romantic comedy.

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 Jack is impulsive, confident, family-oriented, and doesn't brood nearly so
often as Edwin. His family’s “gift” has recently manifested, awakening
something deep down, and guaranteeing that Beryl has Jack’s undivided
attention now. However, Jack and Beryl grew up together, so he’s in serious
danger of being permanently banished to the Friend Zone. The only thing he
really has in his favor are his rugged good looks. Jack washes his car at least
three times a week, and is contractually obligated to remove his shirt in at
least 50% of his scenes.

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 The PCs: Now we’ve been extra nice to you all, and included a plethora of
lovely pregenerated characters, but if none of them seem particularly
inspiring to your players, they can create their own, just keep the following
guidelines in mind:

• The characters are college age (~17-22), and all have a reason to be at
Votkatonick University.
• The characters are acquaintances of Beryl, and should have a reason
for siding with either Edwin or Jack.
• And of course, each character should have some kind of supernatural
quality about them.

On to the characters...

A B

JUST GETTING THEM TO TEMPORARILY FOR GET

ABOUT THEIR RIVALRY TO BE THE
ONLY (OR AT LEAST FIRST) ONE TO BE WITH
BERYL WAS AN ACCOMPLISHMENT IN
ITSELF, BUT NOW IT SEEMS BERYL’S ALREADY
BEEN ABLE TO GET JACK AND
EDWIN TO COME TO A
MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL
ARRANGEMENT

A B

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 Name: Mitzy Winters
Concept: The Chosen One
Thingies (1 left):
• Killer Fashion Sense
• Thai Kickboxing
Yo (1): Wins regional MMA championship.
Woe (1): Ends up fighting vampires and demons for
the rest of her short life.
Notes: "Into every generation she is born, one girl
in all the world who possesses the strength and skill
to stand against the forces of --" Screw all that,
Mitzy just wants to party and have a good time.

Name: Vlad
Concept: Not A Vampire
Thingies (1 left):
• Preternatural Strength and Speed
• Old World Charmtm
Yo (1): Buys a castle in England, settles down and
writes his memoirs.
Woe (1): Religious fanatics with stakes and hammers
finally catch up with him.
Notes: Ever since Vlad arrived as an exchange
student from Romania, there were rumors.
Desperate to dispel them as such, he can often be
seen pouring extra garlic on his pizza, or
sunbathing with SPF180 sunblock.

Name: Pauline
Concept: Living Dead Girl
Thingies (1 left):
• Razor Sharp Teeth
• Keen Senses
Yo (1): Eventually opens her own beatnik coffee
shop.
Woe (1): Ends up working as a greeter at
Sprawlmart.
Notes: Pauline has been having the oddest cravings
ever since that zombie bite, but she’s not about to
let that get her down.

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 Name: Weird Ernie
Concept: Conspiracy Theorist
Thingies (1 left):
• Paranoia-Borne Prescience
• Member of the Tin-Foil Hat Brigade
Yo (1): Finds that crucial bit of evidence he needs
to prove everything!
Woe (1): The Men In Black come and take him away,
never to be seen again. A
Notes: Ernie's crusade against the forces of
darkness has taken its toll on his nerves. The
industrial-strength amounts of caffeine he
regularly consumes aren't helping.

Name: Janelle Rosenberg

Concept: Medium Rare
Thingies (1 left):
• Predictions Of Uncanny Accuracy
• I See Dead People
Yo (1): Gets a gig consulting for the cops on missing
persons cases.
Woe (1): Reduced to holding seances for rich old
widows.
Notes: Everywhere she goes, ghosts are always
trying to get her to help them, and every night she
keeps getting someone else's dreams. It wouldn't be
so bad if they weren't always in another language.

Name: Pete Randall

Concept: Party Animal
Thingies (1 left):
• Animal Instinct
• Can Always Find a Keg
Yo (1): Gets picked up as mascot for a prominent
NBA franchise.
Woe (1): Has to face a lifetime of shaving 3 hours
every day for a real job.
Notes: Pete is here to party, and there's nothing
anyone can do about it. Crank up the tunes and
break out the booze! Full moon is the time when he
really lets his hair down.

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 Name: Bianca Webster
Concept: Devil Girl
Thingies (1 left):
• Brings Out The Worst In People
• Has Friends In Low Places
Yo (1): Gets a job modeling for Hot Topic.
Woe (1): Her real father catches up with her.
Notes: Some girls are just born bad. Bianca’s not
especially proud of her heritage, but she’s not
going to deny it, either.

Name: Selena Talbot

Concept: Teen Witch
Thingies (1 left):
• Dusty Old Spellbook
• It Runs in the Family
Yo (1): Gets her story optioned for a TV show on
the CW.
Woe (1): A group of angry parents gets uppity with
some cans of gasoline.
Notes: Ever since Selena found her grandmother's
special recipe book in the attic, she's been caught
up in the weird world of the occult.

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 GRIN
DMA
ER ST

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 Scenario #4: Terror at the Lake!
Introduction
Welcome to Camp Creepy Lake, the world’s only horror film theme camp!
Located at Lake Quahanachuck, about 20 miles northeast of The Hollow, the
camp is the perfect getaway for anyone tired of the banalities of city life.

Camp Creepy Lake (officially Camp Pinewood) is the newest pet project from
Bradley Real Estate Ventures. Corporate dirtbag Chad Bradley picked up the
property in foreclosure, after the previous owners had some trouble keeping
the camp running.

Normally, a horror-themed camp might sound like fun, but coming from a
money-hungry opportunist like Chad Bradley, it’s definitely a slap in the face
of anyone who embraces the darker side of life. The kids have all been signed
up by their well-meaning parents, and they all end up at the bus stop to head
into the hills for 2 weeks of horror movie mayhem. The camp is accessed via a
dirt road off the interstate. When the Spookybeans get there, the camp
counselors are just a little too enthusiastic about their jobs, and spout
upbeat mottos about teamwork and self-esteem that would make even the
most muscle-headed personal trainer cringe. It’s very obvious that the camp
is underfunded at the moment, and the maintenance work on the buildings is
far from complete. On Friday night, the fun begins...

Inspiration
Sleepaway Camp, Friday the 13th, The Blair Witch Project, Poison Ivy (the
one with Michael J. Fox & Nancy McKeon, not the one with Drew Barrymore),
Meatballs, Addams Family Values, the Kamp Krusty episode of The Simpsons,
any screwball summer camp movie.

Game Setup
There are basically two ways to run this scenario:
• Straight: If you have less than 4 players, have them all choose campers,
and run the camp staff as NPCs. Note: The stats given for the camp
staff are specifically for Head to Head. Feel free to ignore them if
running the game straight.
• Head to Head: If you have 4 or more players, you can split them into 2
groups, and have one side play the kids and the other play the camp
staff. Try to balance the number of characters on each side.

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 Running the Game
• The weekend is filled with bad attempts at scaring the campers and
trying to make them fear for their lives. Of course, the campers are not
going to take this lying down, and it shouldn't be too long before all-out
war is declared. By the end of the scenario, the staff should be terrified
of the kids! Let the players run free with this scenario, and let everyone
pull out all the horror movie cliches.
• Insert an NPC into the group (or groups, as the case may be), it makes it
easier to provide guidance if necessary.
• Adversity a direct measure of how much you want the characters to fail.
If things seem to easy for the players, roll more dice.
• Ouchies mean that Character Failure = Player Success. This is key.
• Let the players drive the story, but be prepared to take the reins back
if necessary.
• Don't be afraid to say No if a player is trying to do something stupid
(unless it's also something funny).
• Let the players do whatever they want to try to punish the camp staff,
even if the whole camp gets trashed in the process, because hey, it's
funny.

Possible Half-Assed Scares

• Counselors turn up screaming and splattered with fake blood.
• Human bones found in the kitchen turn out to be plastic.
• Rusty farm implements, covered in dark red paint.
• Straitjacket with ripped straps, splashed with dark red paint.
• Skinned fake animal carcasses.
• Three words: Mock Ritual Sacrifice.

Not So Half-Assed Scares

• What dangers lurk in the surrounding forest?
• What sinister secrets might Chad Bradley be hiding about the camp and
its history? Just why did the old camp close down, anyway? Abandoned
uranium mine? Ancient indian burial ground? Toxic waste landfill? Real
mass murderers?
• While we’re on the subject, why is Bradley concerned in catering to the
interests of the freaky kids in the first place? Is he out to cash in on
the Spookybeans’ love of freaky stuff, or is this just another one of his
real estate schemes, and he’s just waiting for an excuse to pave over
the place?
• What’s going on here? Good question. Answer: You Decide!

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 Endgame
As the bad horror movie hijinks ensue, keep tabs on everyone’s Yo and Woe
scores. The endgame triggers are as follows:
• If running the scenario straight: If the group’s total Yo or Woe reaches
5, the scenario’s over.
• If running head to head: If either group’s total Yo reaches 5, the
scenario’s over (Note: For the purposes of scoring, treat Joanne as a
camper, and Bridget as a member of the camp staff).
• Alternately, if you run out of time, the scenario’s over.
• In any event, roll each character’s Yo vs. their Woe to determine where
they each end up.

To determine the fate of the camp:

• If running straight: Total up the Skulls rolled by each of the players for
their Yo, and compare it to the total Skulls rolled by the GM for
everyone’s Woe.
• If running head to head: Total the Skulls rolled by the campers for their
Yo, and compare it to the total Skulls rolled by the camp staff for their
Yo.
• If the campers win, the camp staff is terrified, the counselors all quit,
and the camp goes under. If not, then the camp is a success, and the
staff immediately begin tooling up for a full schedule of events starting
next month.

Places to Go
This scenario is not located in The Hollow, so the characters' usual haunts
are not accessible. But not to fear, there's still plenty to do.

The Forest: Surrounds the camp on three sides. Rumors of cannibal hillbillies
living in the wild are probably exaggerated.

The Road: A dirt road leads to the camp from State Highway 10. A large
wooden sign supported by faux totem poles proclaims “Welcome to Camp
Pinewood”.

Parking Lot: A gravel-covered area large enough to accommodate 10

schoolbuses.

The Flag Pole: Hoist someone up and see who salutes.

Main Office/Dining Hall: The largest building on the campgrounds houses the
administrative offices. The dining area is open to the outside, with just a roof
supported by metal poles. There is enough table space for 120 people.

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 The Picnic Area: There are 15 sturdy wooden picnic tables, complete with
rusty barbeque grills.

The Showers: Restroom services come in the form of a large concrete

bunker, housing both toilet and shower facilities. It's divided into two sides, of
course; one for boys, one for girls.

The Cabins: There are 15 cabins, each named after a famous Native American
tribe (Cherokee, Blackfoot, Sioux, etc). Each has 4 sets of uncomfortable
bunk beds, and no glass in the windows.

Tennis & Basketball Courts, Archery Range: For the athletically inclined. The
equipment is kept in a storeroom in the main office.

The Firepits: a wide open space by the beach, perfect for singalongs and
roasting marshmallows. There are places for three large bonfires, each
surrounded by several low wooden benches.

The Docks: Great place to watch the swimmers, or do some fishing.

The Swimming Area: A small section of the lake cordoned off, where it is
relatively safe to swim.

The Boathouse: Houses 2 sailboats, half a dozen rowboats, and a whole host
of rickety sailing gear.

The Lake: Stretches across the camp's eastern border.

The Well: The main office and the bathrooms have running water, but the rest
of the camp gets it the old fashioned way: from a hole in the ground.

Steam Room: A great place to relax and shed those extra pounds. Just don’t
get locked in.

Toolshed: Houses all of the hardware required to keep the camp in top
condition. Rakes, shovels, hammers, screwdrivers, lawnmowers, icepicks,
nailguns, chainsaws…

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 1

11
15

10
13
12 14

6
12
3
16
2
4
5

19

17
18 Map Key
1. The Forest
2. Road to Highway 10
3. Parking
4. The Flag Pole
8 7 5. Main Office/Dining
Hall
6. The Picnic Area
8 7. The Showers
8. The Cabins
9. Tennis Court
8 10. Basketball Court
11. Archery Range
12. The Firepits
13. The Docks
14. The Swimming Area
15. The Boathouse
1 17. The Lake
17. The Well
18. Steam Room
19. Toolshed

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 People to Be
The NPCs: There are three revelant characters in this scenario:

Mike Bradley is the camp director. Mike is Chad’s younger brother, and he’s
fairly upbeat for a guy who's completely henpecked. The scariest thing about
him is that he actually believes the sugar-coated self-esteem tripe he spouts
all day long. Chad has put him in charge of the camp as a favor, after a rather
unfortunate streak of bad financial planning sunk his former career as a
stockbroker. He needs the camp to succeed in order to prove to Chad that
he’s not a complete failure, and to keep his wife happy.

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 Debbie Weston-Bradley is Mike’s overbearing wife. She would be the power
behind the throne, but that would actually require the pretense that Mike
was in charge of anything. Debbie is ready to do whatever it takes to ensure
that Mike continues to provide the lifestyle to which she’s become
accustomed. Failing that, the divorce lawyers are on speed-dial.

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 Crazy Rufus has been the caretaker of Camp Pinewood for nearly 30 years,
and it would be the perfect job if it weren’t for all the damn kids everywhere.
When the old camp closed down, no one bothered to tell him he was fired, but
he barely even noticed. However, after a few years, he did start to wonder
why the job had gotten so much easier. And now it’s all started up again, with
the running and the screaming and the gangly arms and legs.

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 The PCs: Now we’ve been extra nice to you all, and included a plethora of
lovely pregenerated characters, but if none of them seem particularly
inspiring to your players, they can create their own, just keep the following
guidelines in mind:

• The campers are all elementary school or junior high school age (around
8 to 14).
• Counselors are a bit older (17+).
• The campers all have parents or guardians that are operating under the
wonderfully misguided notion that their children would enjoy being
shipped off to a summer camp, especially one based around a cheesy
horror movie theme.
• The counselors are all in need of an easy summer job.

On to the characters!

RrRrRrRr
I’m a Psycho
RrRrRrRr

PINEWOOD

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 Unhappy Campers
Name: Nina Ann Ravenspoe
Concept: Kinderbat
Thingies (1 left):
• Lunchbox Fu
• My Very Existence Is An Act Of Rebellion
Yo (1): Starts her own line of gothic hair
accessories.
Woe (1): My Little Pony themed birthday party.
Notes: Nina is a born leader, and underneath the
thin veneer of sugary sweet cuteness lies a vicious
mean streak a mile wide.

Name: Matt MacFarlane

Concept: Problem Child
Thingies (1 left):
• I Always Have A Lighter Around
• Working Knowledge of Organic Chemistry
Yo (1): Gets a job rigging practical effects for
Michael Bay when he grows up.
I See
Woe (1): Expelled for blowing up all the toilets in the Dumb
school. Simultaneously. People
Notes: Matt gets bored very easily. He also knows
at least fifty ways to blow things up with common
household items. He’s watched a lot of
Mythbusters.

Name: Carla Andrews

Concept: Bookworm
Thingies (1 left):
• I Read Something About This Once
• Too Smart for My Own Good
Yo (1): Gets her first novel published before she's
out of Junior High School.
Woe (1): Funding runs out on that college
scholarship.
Notes: Carla generally wants to be left alone to
read. Of course her parents will have none of that.
After all, the summer camp experience is all about
making new friends, and the wonders of The Great
Outdoors.

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 Name: Timmy Jordan
Concept: The Quiet One
Thingies (1 left):
• Mr. Pokey Doesn’t Like You At All
• Hypnotic Stare
Yo (1): Starts a highly successful Weight Loss
Through Hypnosis racket.
Woe (1): Falls in with a creepy cult. Things go fine
until the compound is raided by the ATF.
Notes: Timmy doesn't go anywhere without his
stuffed rabbit, Mr. Pokey. His parents are
terrified of him, and they shipped him off to camp
so they could finally get a few nights' sleep.

Name: Melvin Robinson

Concept: Basketcase
Thingies (1 left):
• Oh, I’ve Got Meds For That
• Massive Headgear
Yo (1): The side effects from his meds finally start
cancelling each other out.
Woe (1): Grows up to become the world's worst
hypochondriac.
Notes: Melvin is afraid of just about everything,
and anything he isn’t afraid of, he very likely
allergic to. His mother was against sending him
here, but his fatherseems to think he needs some
toughening up.

Name: Bridget Rosenberg

Concept: Tattletale
Thingies (1 left):
• You’ll Never Guess What I Heard!
• Impervious to Deterrence
Yo (1): Gets a job writing a gossip column for Sordid
Celebrity Weekly.
Woe (1): In the wrong place at the wrong time, and
overhears something she shouldn't. Never seen
again.
Notes: If ever you want to keep a secret, DON’T
TELL BRIDGET! She’ll report any hijinks to the
camp staff as soon as possible. Her parents sent
her to camp just to get some peace and quiet.

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 Camp Counselors
Name: Alan
Concept: The Dreamboat
Thingies (1 left):
• Pefect Hair & Skin
• Flex Impressively
Yo (1): Becomes a Calvin Klein model.
Woe (1): Ideal candidate for underground kidney
harvesting operation.
Notes: With his ability to turn negligance into an
Olympic Sport, Alan seems far more concerned with
his appearance than the kids’ well-being.

Name: Brooke
Concept: The Blonde
Thingies (1 left):
• Incredibly Gullible
• Mathematical Savant
Yo (1): Her team comes in 1st in the Regional Co-Ed
Volleyball Championships.
Woe (1): Inadvertently ends up working in the adult
film industry.
Notes: The lights are on, but nobody's home.

Name: Donny
Concept: The Sadist
Thingies (1 left):
• Atomic Wedgie
• Stop Hitting Yourself
Yo (1): Becomes a prison guard.
Woe (1): Becomes a 2nd rate high school PE
teacher.
Notes: Donny exists for one reason, and one
reason only: to make kids' lives miserable. He’s
recently graduated from stealing lunch money to
every bully’s dream: a position of faux authority.

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 Name: Craig
Concept: The Athlete
Thingies (1 left):
• Gotta Stay in Shape
• Take One for the Team
Yo (1): Gets an endorsement contract with Croc
Jock Energy Drinks.
Woe (1): A busted knee relegates him to a career in
food service.
Notes: Craig is more than a little obsessive about
sports, to say the least.

Name: Constance
Concept: The Killjoy
Thingies (1 left):
• Righteous Indignation
• “Rule #43, Paragraph 2 clearly states...”
Yo (1): Embarks on a rewarding career as an OSHA
inspector.
Woe (1): Her career as a police officer is cut short
when she attempts to quell a riot... by herself.
Notes: If there’s any way to take the fun out of an
activity in the name of following safety guidelines,
Constance will find it. She’s a stickler for rules and
regulations.

Name: Joanne
Concept: The Cool One
Thingies (1 left):
• Bet Ya Can't Do This...
• Hands Off the Switchblade
Yo (1): Gets a job doing tattoos at Drill Bitz.
Woe (1): Ends up stuck behind the register at
Javasaurus Rex.
Notes: Joanne’s only here because this was part of
her community service. It’s no skin off her nose if
the camp fails, and she could be a valuable ally if the
kids can get on her good side.

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 Short Cuts
Here are some quick story ideas you can basically just toss in anywhere to
shake things up a little.

The Bone Crew

This enigmatic trio pops up from time, usually in the vicinity of the cemetery.
What are they up to? Are they robbing graves? Enacting forbidden rituals?
Or are they this world’s last hope against invasion from the Underworld? Only
the GM knows.

• Ezekiel: A half-crazed self-proclaimed prophet, Ezekiel's on a quest for

eternal life. He's strung together myths, legends, and superstitions from
a dozen different occult sources, many of them contradictory. Irritable,
arrogant, occasionally incomprehensible, his overinflated sense of
superiority is topped only by his lack of personal hygiene.
• Vanya: Ezekiel's lieutenant. Mercenary to the extreme. Doesn't believe in
any of this mystical mumbo-jumbo, but she’s willing to humor Ezekiel as
long as his money is good.
• Mongo: Hulking brute. Does the heavy lifting for Ezekiel. The dullest knife
in the drawer. In accordance with narrative directive, he combines
savage violence with almost childlike innocence.

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 Teddy Rasputin is Not Your Friend
In 1916, Grigori Rasputin,The Mad Monk, was stabbed, poisoned, shot,
drowned, and finally burned by agents seeking to put an end to his influence
over the Romanov family. However, that was not his end. In the moments
before Prince Yusupov and his compatriots burst in on Rasputin, he had
managed to enact an ancient Sumerian ritual that transferred his soul to an
inanimate object for safekeeping - in this case, Princess Anastasia's
favorite toy, a stuffed bear (a gift from President Theodore Roosevelt).

The toy survived the fires of the October Revolution, and changed hands
many times before disappearing in the 1950s. It was thought lost forever
until it resurfaced in 1994 in Minsk, whereupon it again began to circulate
amongst private collectors. It was recently sold on eBay, and made its way to
the United States, into the hands of a collector of Romanov antiquities, who
also happened to be a history professor at Votkatonick University...

Once the toy was brought within the confines of the university, the mystical
energy surrounding the campus has allowed Rasputin to actually animate the
bear, causing it to walk and talk by sheer force of will. Needless to say, he's
just a little pissed off.

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 I Reject Your Reality, and Substitute My Own
A camera crew has arrived in the neighborhood, hoping to get footage for a
new reality TV show called Hollow Lives. Needless to say, they find the PCs
incredibly interesting, and will proceed to follow them around everywhere,
inadvertently getting them into all kinds of trouble.

The first thing they’ll do is get some establishing shots of the PCs going
about their business around the neighborhood. Occasionally, they’ll miss a
particular shot, and ask the PCs to do it again.

At some point they’ll try to get the PCs into the Confessional Booth one at a
time, and get them to talk about their friends candidly and openly. They’ll then
proceed to use that as fodder to artificially inflate any potential conflicts
between the PCs.

If the PCs are of legal age, alcohol will be added to the mix. What the crew are
really looking for is a completely over-the-top public breakdown. Yelling,
screaming, throwing furniture, all there are ratings gold.

At some point it should occur to the PCs that they’re being exploited, and
they can do whatever they want about it. They may decide to just play along,
or they may be genuinely receptive. It should be noted however, that sooner
or later, the promises of fame and fortune are sure to turn out to be
greatly exaggerated, and then it’s up to them to try and regain their dignity,
one way or another.

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 Music is My Life!
The PCs’ favorite band is currently touring to support their latest album,
and they’re playing in The City next. There’s just one problem.

The actual obstacle(s) will depend greatly on the nature of the characters, of
course. Perhaps the concert is on a school night and they can’t stay out
late. Maybe they don’t have the cash to pay for tickets. Or if they do, they
only found out about the concert just after tickets have sold out. Or maybe
getting a ride is the problem. In any event, there is a burning need to get into
that concert, and maybe even backstage to meet the band. One thing is
certain: this is gonna be EPIC. The only question now is: How are they gonna
pull it off?

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 The Day The Thing From Another World Stood Still
“Hey, where’d that strange kid come from? You know the one, the short one
with the weird hair, never talks to anyone, always messing around with some
weird gadget, mumbling to himself. What? Did I try talking to him? Of course
not! I’m not a freak.

“I think he’s an alien. Yeah, he probably came here as the first stage of a full-
scale invasion. They’re probably here to drain the planet of its resources, or
maybe they need us for food, or we’re the only ones in the galaxy that know
how to set up voicemail on cell phones or something. I don’t know, ask him. he’s
the alien.

“Oh, there he is. Just look at him, see what I mean? Look at his skin, he looks
like he got caught in a Nuclear Testing site. Oh no, he’s coming over here.
Quick, pretend you’re blind or something.”

He calls himself Zorak The Mighty, and it’s obvious that he’s up to something,
but no one knows exactly what. Is he really an alien invader, bent on world
domination? Or is he just some really weird kid with a skin condition and a
penchant for technology?

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 Roll Your Own
As you can see, running Spookybeans is mainly a matter of creating a nice big
sandbox for the players to run around in and create all kinds of chaos. From
the scenarios in this book, you’ve seen how we can:

• Create a group of characters that have some kind of connection to each

other
• Create multiple groups of characters with opposing goals
• Create tension and the illusion of danger
• Define something that the characters care about that the GM can then
exploit for story and drama

So what are you waiting for? Get out there and start running your own
games!

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 Gamer“ExitFreaks
Poll”

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 Part 5: Acknowledgements
A goth, a rabbi, and a priest all walk into a bar.
The bartender looks up and says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"

Credit Where Credit's Due

Many of the mechanics in this game were inspired by those of other games.
Here's a list of other games that without which, we would have had to start
from scratch:

• The basic dice resolution mechanic was a simplification of that found in

Sorcerer by Adept Press. An eerily similar evens/odds mechanic was
proposed online as an alternate system for Donjon by CRN Games, but
this was merely a case of parallel development. It also shares similarities
to the system found in Chaosium's Prince Valiant, and John Wick’s Cat.
• Shared narration is an idea that I first saw in Jared Sorensen's
Inspectres and octaNe, but since then it's appeared in a number of indie
RPGs, including John Wick's Houses of the Blooded.
• The idea of the central feature of a character being a large pool of dice
comes from a game called, appropriately enough, The Pool, by Random
Order Creations.
• The idea of freeform abilities, each tailor-made to the character (rather
than choosing from a predetermined list of skills), was inspired equally by
Donjon, Over the Edge by Atlas Games, Orkworld by Wicked Press, and
The Pool.
• The goal of highlighting the disconnect between player
and character (in this case via Ouchies) comes
chiefly from Elfs by Adept Press, and to a certain
degree, kill puppies for satan by Lumpley Games.
• The idea of swapping the dice rolled after a
Conflict came from a game system called
Unistat by Plague Monkey Games
(not to be confused with
Eden Studio's Unisystem).
• The idea of developing one’s
character in play, rather
than laying out everything all
at once beforehand, is an idea
we first encountered in
Issaries' Hero Wars (now called
HeroQuest), but it has popped up
here and there in other games as
well.

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 Jared's Big Three
Jared Sorensen (creator of Inspectres, octaNe, Lacuna, the Parsely series,
and co-creator of Freemarket) once formulated three questions that he
asks any potential game designer who presents him with an idea for a game, in
order to help focus the core concepts of the game. Here’s what we came up
with:

1. What is your game about?

In Spookybeans, success very rarely comes without a price. Whatever the
characters accomplish will almost always be somewhat tarnished with some
undesirable effect that will inevitably come back to haunt them, usually to
humorous effect. The agents of these karmic groin kicks will often be the
characters' own players.

2. How is your game about that?

The main conflict resolution mechanic is centered around a contested die roll
to determine which participant earns the right to narrate the results of the
Conflict. Each player character has a good ending and a bad ending (Yo and
Woe, respectively). The results of the Conflicts will cause the characters to
accrue points in their Yo and Woe scores. At the end of the scenario, the
totals are compared to determine where the character ends up. Characters
develop over time via both their victories and their setbacks.

3. How does your game reward or encourage that

behavior?
As a player, when you win a die roll, you get to narrate the results of the
Conflict. While this will usually be used to declare that your character was
successful in their intended action, you can also introduce negative elements
as well. We call these Ouchies. If you use an Ouchie against your own
character, you earn points towards achieving your character's good ending
(Yo). If a someone else uses an Ouchie against your character, you earn
points toward your character's bad ending (Woe).

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 Inspiration TV
This game wouldn't exist if not for • Invader Zim
the wealth of material that inspired • The Venture Bros.
it. Share and Enjoy. • The Addams Family
• The Munsters
• The Oblongs
Comics • Edgar & Ellen
• Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, • Beetlejuice
Squee, and I Feel Sick by • Metalocalypse
Johnen Vasquez • Lucy, Daughter of the Devil
• Gloomcookie and Nightmares & • Beavis & Butthead
Fairytales by Serena Valentino • Daria
• Oh My Goth! by Voltaire
• Lenore by Roman Dirge
• Scary Godmother by Jill
Books
Thompson • What is Goth? and Paint it Black
• Return to Wonderland and by Voltaire
Beyond Wonderland by Raven • Creepy Susie and 13 Other
Gregory Tragic Tales For Troubled
• American McGee's Grimm by Children by Angus Oblong
Grant Bond • The works of Edward Gorey
• Courtney Crumrin by Ted Naifeh • Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk
• Spell Checkers by Jamie S. Rich
• Sullengrey by Drew Rausch Music
• Emily the Strange by Rob Reger • See Colin Slash
• The works of Charles Addams • Everything Goes Cold
• Voltaire
Movies • The Birthday Massacre
• Beetlejuice, The Nightmare • Murderdolls/Wednesday 13
Before Christmas, Corpse • The Misfits, and related bands
Bride... well, basically anything by started by ex-Misfits members:
Tim Burton Gorgeous Frankenstein, Gotham
• The Addams Family and Road, Graves, Dr. CHUD's X-
associated sequels Ward, The Undead (hell, maybe
• Shaun of the Dead even Samhain and Danzig)
• Fido • Blitzkid
• Zombieland • Balzac
• Serial Mom • Calabrese
• Death Becomes Her • The Coffin Caddies
• Elvira, Mistress of the Dark • Theater Zombies
• Fight Club • Zombeast
• Tucker & Dale vs. Evil • Ghoultown
• Type O Negative
• Midnight Syndicate/Nox Arcana

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 Technical Stuff
This document was created entirely in Xara
Designer Pro. The cover artwork was created in
Adobe Photoshop. The fonts used are Spooky 2 and
Left-Handed Compliment, both created specifically
for this project using HighLogic FontCreator.

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 About the Authors
Okay, so technicially we lied back on Page 1, but “Two Guys From Noo Yawk”
sounds so much better than “One Guy From Noo Yawk and One Guy From San
Francisco, Who Lived In Noo Yawk For A While, And Now Lives In Connecticut.”
Sue us (actually, please don’t).

James Carpio (AKA Dregg) is an avid

old school gamer who has made his way
into the world of small press publishing
and freelance writing. James is the
proprietor of Chapter 13 Press
(Publishers of Pulp Era, Spookybeans,
Death Race Z). James has collaborated
on projects with Eden Studios, Exile
Game Studio, Secret Fire Games and R.
Talsorian Games in the past and is
always looking for that next freelance
job.

On the convention side, James holds

the title of Director of Gaming with
ConnectiCon and has in the past
worked with I-CON Science Fiction,
Questcon, and Gazebo of Games.

Ben Morgan has been drawing since he

was three, and has been gaming since
he was fourteen, but it's only been in
the last 12 years or so that he's put
the two together in any meaningful
way. He's done freelance artwork and
custom character sheets for many
prominent independently published
RPGs, including Inspectres, octaNe,
Elfs, Sorcerer, Trollbabe, Donjon,
Paladin, Bulldogs (d20), Mouse Guard,
and My Life With Master. He also
occasionally has time to rant about the
abuse of internet memes at Burn
After Reading.

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 Index
Rules Brandi, Mandi, Candi, & Claire, 65
Adversity, 11, 18 Brooke, 104
Balance, 38 Burnout, 74
Bones, 11, 20 Chainsaw Dave, 72
Character Creation, 13-17 Constance, 105
Character Development, 26-29 Craig, 105
Character Sheet, 14-16 Crazy Rufus, 100
Cheerleading, 34-35 Donny, 104
Competition, 39 Edwin, 86
Concept, 11, 15 Ezekiel, 106
Conflicts, 11, 18-25 Hatori, Amanda, 74
Dice, 20 Hollow Lives, 108
GM (Game Moderator), 12 Jack, 87
Locations, 41 Jackson, Officer Yvonne, 75
Narration, 12, 16, 20-21 Joanne, 95, 105
NPC (Non-Player Character), 12 Johansen, Cameron, 63
Ouchies, 12, 21 Johansen, Summer, 65
PC (Player Character), 12 Jordan, Timmy, 103
Player, 12 MacDermott, Father James, 76
Pool, 12, 18-19 MacFarlane, Droo, 62
Relationships, 43 MacFarlane, Matt, 102
Roll Your Own, 111 Malone, Mac, 75
Scene Framing 101, 33 Mongo, 106
Session, 12 Pauline, 14, 89
Skulls, 12, 20 Prescott, Victoria, 65
Spooky Con Carne, 40 Randall, Pete, 90
Stash, 12, 17, 19 Rasputin, Teddy, 107
Story, 13 Ravenspoe, Edgar Allen, 62
The Rule Of Awesome, 35 Ravenspoe, Nina Ann, 102
Thingies, 13, 15, 19, 26 Robinson, Laura, 76
Woe, 13, 16, 21, 28 Robinson, Melvin, 103
Yo, 13, 16, 21, 28 Robinson, Nikki, 63
Rosenberg, Bridget, 95, 103
Rosenberg, Janelle, 90
People Rosenberg, Maureen, 75
Alan, 104 Smokey, 61
Andrews, Carla, 102 Spookybeans, 9
Andrews, Larry, 63 St. James, Lillianne, 62
Andrews, Wes, 74 Sunflower, 60
Beryl, 85 Talbot, Selena, 91
Bradley, Ana, 64 The Bone Crew, 106
Bradley, Chad, 59 Thompson, Brock, 64
Bradley, Mike, 98 Vanya, 106

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 Vlad, 89 Stories
Webster, Bianca, 91 Going Out Of Business, 53
Weird Ernie, 90 Dave Of The Dead, 67
Weston-Bradley, Debbie, 99 The World Of Insufficient Light,
Winters, Mitzy, 89 79
Worthington, Pierce III, 64 Terror at the Lake!, 93
YYO (Yuppie Youth Organization), Short Cuts, 106
64
Zombies, 67, 73
Zorak The Mighty, 110

Places
Apocalypse Burger, 57
Berzerkoid, 56
Camp Pinewood, 95
Drill Bitz, 83
Javasaurus Rex, 56
Kit Shickers, 82
Lenore's Demise, 82
Market Square, 57
Pee Pee Sanchez, 83
Riverside Park, 57
Ross Perot High School, 57
Sacred Heart Hospital, 70
Shop & Stock, 70
Slumber Hollow Memorial Gardens,
56
SPANK, 82
Suds & Spins, 82
Sunrise Shopping Complex, 70
The Euphorium, 53
The Hollow, 49
The Keeper's Den, 56
The Violet Eye, 82
Votkatonick University, 55, 70,
80
Westhill, 83
Yakuza Danny's, 83
Zippy Mart, 56, 83

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 Mopey black cornflakes swimming in my bowl of despair;
Sour milk scorns my toast and jelly brings a taste of Death;
My juice doth linger in frightful contemplation with thy butter.
Bacon screams the Death Cries of my soul
while the blueberries turn my pancakes to black.

Woe is he who takes Breakfast in vain...

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 THE

CUBE

It’s Pointless. Just Like Life.

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 100 years have passed since Mankind
revolted and slew the Sorcerer Kings.
Now, the survivors of seven kingdoms begin to rebuild, placing new lives and hopes on the ashes of
old. However, even as life continues an ancient and forgotten evil stirs awaiting its moment to strike
against mankind.

Join a war-torn land where the

struggle for survival continues as
new empires arise to impose
their will upon the masses.
Vicious warlords fight to control
territories carved out of fallen
Kingdoms. Imposing magicians
emerge claiming the legacy of the
Sorcerer Kings. High Priests of
long forgotten gods and
goddesses amass wealth in the
name of divine right while
Warrior-priests, devoted to a
banished god, patrol the lands
bringing justice to people
abandoned by their rulers.

Tales of the Fallen Empire is a

classic Swords and Sorcery
setting compatible with the
Dungeon Crawl Classics Role
Playing Game. Within these
pages is a detailed post-
apocalyptic fantasy setting taking
you through an ancient realm
that is fighting for its survival
and its humanity. Seek your
fortune or meet your fate in the
burning deserts of the once lush
and vibrant land of Vul, or travel
to the humid jungles of
Xochiquetzal to face the tribes of
the Man-Apes and their brutal
sacrificial rituals.

Within this campaign setting you will find:

D 6 new classes: Barbarian, Witch, Draki, Wanderer, Man-Ape, & Pirate

D Revised Wizard Class (The Sorcerer)
D New Spells
D New Creatures
D Survival & Scrounging Rules
D A detailed setting inspired by the works of Fritz Lieber, Robert E. Howard, Lynn Carter, H. P.
Lovecraft, Michael Moorcock, and Roger Corman

Tighten the straps on your sandals, grab your weapon, and head forth into a land of trouble and
turmoil. Adventure awaits those foolhardy to enter the wastelands or for those who fear not the
unknown.

COMPATIBLE WITH
Available at

DCC
RPG The Largest RPG Download Store!

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 "People may not remember what we say here tonight,
but BY GOD they'll remember what we did."

Presents

THE FAMILY
A Roleplaying Game about
Traditional Values
Chapter Press

Coming Halloween 2012

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 From Chapter Press (Pulp Era, Spookybeans)

It’s 1986, and Vehicular

Manslaughter is no longer illegal...
especially when the victims are already dead.

Feature Presentation
A
Coming in 2013
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 RIGHTEOUS
UNDER 17 REQUIRES ACCOMPANYING
PARENT OR ADULT GUARDIAN

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 Name
The Gothic Comics RPG

Starting

Concept Yo 1

Thingies
Starting

Woe 1

Notes

Thingies Left

© MMXI Chapter 13 Press, Inc. All Lefts Reversed. Permission granted to

photocopy this page, but why not save this poor book’s spine and go to
http://www.spooybeans.com/download/ to get a PDF of the sheet instead?

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bede rogerson (Order #4120245)
 Cuz I’m a Hardcore Rivethead Gothic Freak...
Spookybeans is the roleplaying game of
dark, quirky, off-the-wall, somewhat
macabre gothic toons.

Inspired by the worlds of:

• Serena Valentino
• Jhonen Vasquez
• Voltaire
• Roman Dirge
• Ted Naifeh
• Charles Addams
• Edward Gorey
• Tim Burton
• and many others

Features:
• Fast, simple system
• Create characters in two minutes or The dows
less C r u xsha

• Use any kind of dice you want

• Mechanics designed to keep players
engaged (even when it's not their turn)

From now on, every day is Halloween...

The Gothic Comics RPG

Chapter Press
bede rogerson (Order #4120245)