Worksheets ThrivinginRelationshipsWhenYouHaveOCD

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Reassurance Tracking
Reassurance Tracking
Use the chart below to record situations where you asked for reassurance. Then answer the questions in the next set of columns to track how reassurance manifests for you.
Situation What were your emotions? Did you ask only Was source Did you accept
once? credible? the answer?
Example: Asked my friend if she was mad at me Anxiety no yes no
© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Permission is granted to the reader to reproduce this form for personal use.
Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Reducing Accommodations Hierarchy
Reducing Accommodations Hierarchy

List the accommodations in your relationship that you plan to reduce, from least to most difficult. Next rate your willingness to take these actions on a 1 to 10 scale, where
1 is completely unwilling and 10 is completely willing, and ask your loved one to rate their willingness as well. Then mutually set target dates for achieving each reduction in
accommodation.
Accommodation Reduction Your willingness Their willingness Target date

(1 to 10 scale) (1 to 10 scale)
Example: Tasha follows me only halfway home from work 8 10 Now
Example: Tasha doesn’t follow me home from work 5 8 1 month

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Places to Make Friends When You Have OCD
Places to Make Friends When You Have OCD

Here are some places to make new friends. Which of these opportunities would you like to pursue? If you feel inspired, take notes
here or in your journal, make plans, and act on them.
At work: Do your office mates ever go out after work or are there any social traditions that you could participate in… or start? Any
company sports or trivia teams to join? Anyone at work who you’ve generally enjoyed talking to who might be worth inviting to
hang out? This is probably the place where you spend the most time outside of the home, so take advantage if you can.
Faith-based communities: Do you identify with a particular religion but don’t have a regular house of worship? Joining one can be
a great way to make new friends. In addition to meeting others at weekly services, you may find that there are small groups or com-
mittees that appeal to you. Is this something you’d like to pursue?
In the neighborhood: Is there anyone in your neighborhood whom you’d like to get to know better? Someone you like talking with
or whose dog gets along well with yours? Maybe you’ve heard your favorite music coming out of their apartment or want the name
of that fantastic color they just painted their house. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a friend this accessible?
Hobbies: With social media and other online communities, finding fellow enthusiasts of all stripes is increasingly easy, especially if
you’re in an urban area. There truly is something for everyone. What hobbies would you like to pursue?
Sports: As an athlete or a diehard fan, you can find opportunities to engage with the sport you love and make friends at the same
time. Do you want to join a recreational league in your area or a club that supports a team of your choice? Consider finding “watch”
parties or pickup games and just showing up.

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Places to Make Friends When You Have OCD
Volunteer opportunities: This could be a great step to put your values into action. Find a cause or organization that speaks to you
and inquire about opportunities to work alongside like-minded people. What appeals most to you?
OCD support groups: One of the biggest concerns people with OCD have about meeting new people is that their symptoms will
be misunderstood. Imagine joining a group of people who already know the mental twists and turns of living with OCD. Even if
their symptoms are different, they will be familiar with the terrain. Does this appeal to you? Look online in your area.

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Friendship Exposure Hierarchy
Friendship Exposure Hierarchy

List some of your friendship values at the top of this worksheet. In the left column, choose values from your list that you would like
to express in your friendships. Write down some exposures to express these values, from least to most difficult, in the Friendship
Exposure column; rate your willingness on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 indicates that you’re unwilling to try this exposure now and
10 means that you’re willing to jump in. You can use this as a guide to try out new valued behaviors in your friendships.
My friendship values:
Value Friendship Exposure Willingness

(1 to 10 scale)

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Romantic Relationships Exposure Hierarchy
Romantic Relationships Exposure Hierarchy

List some of your romantic relationship values at the top of this worksheet. In the left column, choose values from your list that you
would like to express in your romantic relationships. Write down some exposures to express these values, from least to most difficult,
in the Romantic Relationship Exposure column; rate your willingness on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 indicates that you’re unwilling
to try this exposure now and 10 means that you’re willing to jump in. Use this as a guide to try out new behaviors in your
relationship.
My romantic relationship values:
Value Romantic Relationship Exposure Willingness

(1 to 10 scale)

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Messages About Sex
Messages About Sex

Use this worksheet to identify some of the messages you might have received about sex and to reflect on how these inform your view
of sex now:
Growing up, where did you learn about sex and sexuality (from school, home, places of worship, TV/movies, pornography…)?
How did your family talk about sex and sexuality? Were these welcome conversations, or was the topic generally avoided?
In the messages you received, what emotions were associated with sex (such as joy, anxiety, shame, guilt)?
When it comes to sex, how does OCD affect your feelings, beliefs, and behaviors? How does this relate (if at all) to the messages you
received?
If you could have the kind of relationship to sex that you want, free of OCD’s influence and any messages that you no longer believe,
what would it look like? Use your imagination to help identify your sexual values (such as adventure, faith, playfulness, connection,
intimacy, sacredness), and write them down here.

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Setting Household Goals
Setting Household Goals

Fill out this worksheet to set some new household goals and develop a plan to achieve them. Under Goal, what do you want to be
able to do eventually? Under Motivation, why do you want to be able to do this? What values are involved? Under Associated com-
pulsions/safety behaviors, what does your OCD demand that you do to complete this task? What circumstances must be present?
Answer these questions and then fill in some possible exposure and response prevention steps.
Goal:
Motivation:
Associated compulsions/safety behaviors:
Possible exposure steps:
Possible response prevention steps:

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Sample Floor Plan of Attack
Sample Floor Plan of Attack
Date:
Off Limits to Me
Off Limits to Others

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Challenging Your Family Narrative About OCD
Challenging Your Family Narrative About OCD

Complete the prompts below to identify the messages you’ve received from family members, extended family, family by marriage, or
anyone else who’s important to you:
1. My family believes that mental illness is
2. When it comes to mental health, my family
3. In my family, OCD
4. In my family, therapy is
5. In my family, medication for mental health is
Now write out your family narrative here or in your journal. It need not be more than a paragraph in length. Underline any parts of
your family narrative that you want to challenge. Then write down your alternative belief or beliefs.

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Parenting Exposure Hierarchy
Parenting Exposure Hierarchy

List some of your parenting values at the top of this worksheet. In the left column, choose values from your list that you would most
like to convey to your children. Write down some exposures to express these values, from least to most difficult, in the Parenting
Exposure column; rate your willingness on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 indicates that you’re unwilling to try this exposure now and
10 means that you’re willing to jump in. Use this as a guide to try out new behaviors with your children.
My parenting values:
Value Parenting Exposure Willingness

(1 to 10 scale)

Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Workplace Exposure Hierarchy
Workplace Exposure Hierarchy

List some of your workplace values at the top of this worksheet. In the left column, choose values from your list that you would most
like to express at work. Write down some exposures to express these values, from least to most difficult, in the Workplace Exposure
column; rate your willingness on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 indicates that you’re unwilling to try this exposure now and 10 means
that you’re willing to jump in. Use this as a guide to try out new behaviors in your relationships at work.
My workplace values:
Value Workplace Exposure Willingness

(1 to 10 scale)


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Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Reassurance Tracking

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Reducing Accommodations Hierarchy

Accommodation Reduction Your willingness Their willingness Target date

Example: Tasha doesn’t follow me home from work 5 8 1 month

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Places to Make Friends When You Have OCD

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Friendship Exposure Hierarchy

Value Friendship Exposure Willingness

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Romantic Relationships Exposure Hierarchy

My romantic relationship values: 

Value Romantic Relationship Exposure Willingness

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Messages About Sex

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Setting Household Goals

Associated compulsions/safety behaviors:

Possible exposure steps:

Possible response prevention steps:

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Sample Floor Plan of Attack

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Challenging Your Family Narrative About OCD

1. My family believes that mental illness is 

2. When it comes to mental health, my family 

5. In my family, medication for mental health is 

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Parenting Exposure Hierarchy

Value Parenting Exposure Willingness

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

Workplace Exposure Hierarchy

Value Workplace Exposure Willingness

© 2022 Amy Mariaskin / New Harbinger Publications.

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Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD Reassurance Tracking

My romantic relationship values:

1. My family believes that mental illness is

2. When it comes to mental health, my family

5. In my family, medication for mental health is