The Bards Tale Prima Official Eguide
The Bards Tale Prima Official Eguide
The Bards Tale Prima Official Eguide
ISBN: 0-7615-4564-6
Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 2004107116
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Here you’ll find everything you’ll need to know to get your bearings in The Bard’s Tale – from controller basics, to
the minutiae of battle dynamics, a complete talent list,
Start (PS2 and Xbox): Pauses the game and allows you
A Game Controls to reload saves, reset your game, or enter an options
menu.
Left Analog Stick (PS2 and Xbox): Moves the Bard
around. In typical analog-control fashion, the more you L1 Button (PS2) / White Button (Xbox): Brings up the
press in any direction, the quicker the Bard will move. Melee Weapon selection menu.
Right Analog Stick (PS2 and Xbox): Controls the camera. L2 Button (PS2) / Black Button (Xbox): Brings up the
Use to zoom out or in on the overhead view, or to rotate Ranged Weapon and Musical Instrument selection menu.
the camera angle. Pressing this in will toggle the auto-
map in the upper-right on and off, or expand it to full- R1 Button (PS2) / Right Trigger (Xbox): Brings up the
screen-size. Tune selection menu.
Directional Pad (PS2 and Xbox): Allows the Bard to issue R2 Button (PS2) / Left Trigger (Xbox): Brings up the
orders to his party. Press up to let forth a cry of “Attack!” Artifact selection menu.
or “Charge!”, and command the summon to attack
whatever enemies are nearest until they are dead; down Square Button (PS2) / X Button (Xbox): Press to open a
to command the summon to pull back from attack (“Hold door or chest, to speak to NPCs within the vicinity of the
back!” / “Back off!”); left to command the summon to Bard, or to tip cows.
hold his/her/its position and take a defensive stance (“Stay
where you are!” / “Stand your ground!”); and right to X Button (PS2) / A Button (Xbox): Press to attack with
beckon the summon out of its current action and back to your equipped weapon. Tap several times to unleash a
the Bard’s side, where it will defend him from nearby combo of strikes.
attackers. (“Over here!” / “To me!”)
Triangle Button (PS2) / Y Button (Xbox): Press to jump.
Select (PS2) / Back (Xbox): Brings up the status display.
Here you can view your equipment, your talents, the Circle Button (PS2) / B Button (Xbox): Press to parry or
tunes you’ve learned, and the amount of money and block an enemy’s attack.
number of Adderstones at your disposal.
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The ornate, often circular pattern found carved on the front of a lute is called the “rose.”
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
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The rules of traditional Scottish Highland games dictate that all participants wear kilts.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
SAVE POINT ARROW TRAP AXE TRAP BOULDER TRAP CRUSHER TRAP SPIKE TRAP VINE TRAP
You can save Beware of arrows Watch for a large A huge boulder Two slabs will Be they organic A vine will reach
your game at this shooting out axe to spring out will roll when crash together to or metallic, out from here to
spot. from this point. here. you get here. crush you here. spikes pop here. lash you.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Go to the cellar to investigate the rat problem. Defeat giant rat. Find Bannafeet in the Fairyhaunt
Forest. Investigate the Bugbear in the town cairn. Free Ketill Swart from the Jail in Houton Forest.
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: BROADSWORD Level: 1
and Environs TOWN OF HOUTON Armor: PADDED ARMOR Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
Broadsword. (The Bard’s plain-jane Sword will automati- to the giant rat and, tapping the D-Pad “up” to command
cally convert into 25 Silver Pieces – going forward, the electrical beastie to go head-long (or I guess sphere-
whenever you obtain a weapon better than the one you long) into a charge, the Thunder Spider will unleash a hell
currently have, the old one of voltage on the vermin, frying it to a crisp.
will go away and you’ll
become instantly richer in When you return to Mary and engage her in a chat, you
the amount of the used can react to her gratitude with either a “snarky” or a “nice”
weapon’s SP value.) response. For Mary, “nice” equals “milksop,” and should
you choose that option, well, after bedtime comes on,
With this weapon in hand, you’ll find yourself hitting the hay all on your lonesome.
charge back down the stairs. Be a bit snarky, however, and you’ll lay the wench.
Before you can get too far From the shadows, ugliness.
beyond the foot of the
steps, a nutty figure named
Truncherface will step from
the shadows, give the Bard
a brief tutorial, then teach
him the Thunder Spider
summoning tune. Play this
Tune, and a ball-lightning-
like creature will appear
over your shoulder – lead it Smells like victory. (Dramatic re-creation.)
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
*
reward is in store if you can destroy the
Bugbear and liberate the Cairn. You can To World Map
be snarky or nice to him, but I would
suggest taking the nice tact. (See pg. 16.) Sheriff Shop
Kirk
(2) A woman reports that her son Ogan
has taken off from home, out of the belief The
that he is some kind of “Chosen One.” If Well & Drunken
Pup Rat
you happen to spot the lad somewhere on
the outskirts of town, where he’s traipsing C
in search of a fair maiden... give him a Boyd’s
Barrels Ogan’s
Mum
Old Man A
Vinter B
Wanted Poster (10 SP) Bugbear
A Cairn Daurrad
Self-Help Book (10 SP)
(
Shortcut to To Houton
)
Beer Bottle x 2 (8 SP) Bannafeet
B Forest
5 Silver Pieces
Diary (8 SP)
+
To Fairyhaunt
C approx. 10 Silver Pieces
Woods
THE TOWN OF HOUTON
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: BROADSWORD Level: 1
and Environs TOWN OF HOUTON Armor: PADDED ARMOR Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
Here you can upgrade your Melee Weapon, buy a Bow, effects of Ale only last for a short while (check out the
don some new Armor… or purchase a mysterious, mug-meter in the upper left to see how much time you’ve
10,500 SP Treasure Map. (More on this below, and later got left before the bonuses – and penalties – a specific ale
in this guide.) It’s recommended that you hold off from incurs disappear), but they can be well worth the couple
springing for that coins it takes to make a
Claymore – sure, purchase.
you don’t have
much money You’re also bound to run
right now, but across a happy little white
WEAPONS you’ll have some dog in the center of town
Dirk 600 SP in a little bit – near the Well. We’ll call him
Flail 700 SP because you’ll the Pup, and needless to
find a superior say, upon encountering him
Claymore 800 SP Stock up on the good stuff.
weapon when our gruff hero has to make
Longbow 250 SP and if you venture the choice whether he wants
ARMOR into the nearby to let loose on the poor
Bugbear Cairn. mutt, or throw him the bone
Leather Armor 400 SP of congeniality. Take your
Studded Leather 800 SP And, when all is pick; but I’d suggest letting
MISCELLANY said and done, the Pup tag along – how
don’t forget to else are you going to know
Treasure Map 4000 SP drop back into where buried 4-SP treasure
The Drunken Rat lies? The Pup will dig it up;
Might as well throw him a bone.
to quench your and later, when you level up
gullet with the enough, he can help in
hydrating combat.
pleasures of
alcohol for a few While on the subject of
WIDOW’S WINE +4 CHA,-2 VIT 10 SP Silver Pieces. Just animals, as a side-note, try
BODB’S BLACK ALE +2 RHY 10 SP like the real stuff, pressing the attack button
it’s bound to while near one of the hairy
STROMNESS STOUT +2 STR 15 SP make your Bard oxen creatures that populate
PIG’S MEADE +1 STR,+1 VIT,-4 CHA 5 SP all the more the town… *Whoomph*!
gregarious. The Animals are stupid!!! Is this Houton, or Butte?
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
To Houton *
Hunter
A 30 Silver Pieces
Adderstone x 1
A B 10 Silver Pieces
B
approx. 20 Silver Pieces
C Beer Bottle (4 SP)
E The Bannafeet Feat yourself and a foe when engaging in combat with a melee
weapon, then focus on the timing of your shots (and your
parries) to ensure that everything goes smoothly. If
The first thing you’ll see after making your way past the
you’re lucky, killing a Wolf will result in the Bard being
Save Point upon entering the Fairyhaunt Woods – a lone
able to pull a Pelt, worth 5 SP, from the mangled mess.
Hunter standing around and hanging out. He’ll give you a
In a nice touch that defies standard RPG-convention, the
heads-up on a great way to make some extra cash while
Wolf Pelt will convert automatically into its monetary
laying waste to the other fauna on these sylvan paths.
equivalent. So no having to take it to a Shop and “sell” it
(Yes, bad creatures populate the place – I hope I didn’t
in this game... Sidenote 2: If you have the Pup with you
ruin anything for you, intrepid wanderer.) There are
while you encounter these Wolves, he’ll keep his distance
Grouse everywhere in the Woods, and all it takes is a Bard
rather than risk turning into lupus-chow. If he takes signif-
with a Pup and a ranged weapon – i.e., the Longbow
icant damage, he’s not going to die, he’ll just pass out.
sitting in Seamus’s shop – to
(The Pup maintains his
take part in the small-game
spring-back-up constitution
hunt. As the Hunter will
by not having been
suggest, bring a Grouse
neutered. Note however
back to him once you start
that the Pup won’t get all up
hunting... But first, let’s
in any enemy’s... mess until
cover this Banna-business.
you decide to take on the
Dog Attack talent available
As I just noted, once you
He’s the Hunter. from attaining Level 3 or Operation: Spay starts now.
begin to trudge further into
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: LONGBOW Level: 3
and Environs FAIRYHAUNT WOODS Armor: PADDED ARMOR Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
beyond.) And him. He’ll tell you of his mangy friend Ketill, who appar-
one last sidenote: ently has been locked up in a prison in the Houton Forest
Don’t worry about that can be entered with the password “Fiddlesnarf”; if
leveling up past 2 you free Ketill, then return to Bannafeet, he’ll teach you a
or 3 on these new Tune. A ditty more powerful than the Rat or the
Wolves; you’ll get Thunder Spider? Can such a one even exist?!
the same XP
WOLF amount from the To get to the prison, you’ll have to make your way back
Kunaltrow just a to the town, where there’s an entrance to the Forest at
HP: 20 XP: 20 short time from another breach in the wall. If you want to tie up some
ATK: 1d5 AC: 0 now. Or, level up loose ends though, it might
if you feel like it; it be a better idea for the time
LARGE WOLF doesn’t matter just being to pass through the
HP: 55 XP: 50 yet. stone gate just beyond
Bannafeet’s wrecked
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d2 Now, here’s a little structure and take the
something you shortcut back into Houton,
should know located conveniently right
about pack behavior – when only one Wolf is left from a near the spot where the
once-populous pack, it will retreat a short distance and et entrance to the Bugbear- Emerge here in Houton.
out a loud howl. that will summon more Wolves to atack. infested Cairn stands. It’s in
The Longbow is great at picking these guys off – three this vicinity where you’ll
shots will do it right now. probably run into the sole
Large Wolf who calls this
Eventually, after slaughtering neck of the Fairyhaunt
your fair share of Wolf Woods his home. He’s a lot
packs, you’ll come across a tougher than a regular Wolf,
strange stone edifice inside but if you just stay at a
of which stands the petite distance and peck him with
and, let’s face it, slightly arrows, you’ll be fine. A wolf of gross proportions.
dorky frame of Bannafeet
the Trow. He’s a sniveling
figure and, although nothing The loathsome Bannafeet.
about him smacks of being
very trustworthy, he’ll give
the Bard some interesting
information – ONLY IF you
respond to him “nicely”
rather than “snarkily.” A
snarky response will unleash
Bannafeet’s deviousness,
and before he’ll tell you
anything else you’ll have to A quest made less loathsome.
complete a small “mission” for him: go down the Well in
the center of Houton. (Take the nearby shortcut.) Here
you will find – an empty room. Don’t you see the humor
in this? As is evident, Bannafeet is a regular David
Brenner, and only by taking the trouble to hear the gales
of his laughter in that hollow space will you be able to
earn a cool 200 XP. If you’re “nice” right off the bat, you
don’t get to partake in this XP-pie – he’ll just launch right
into telling you about the real mission which, if you’re
Someone please put this man on a piece of currency.
snarky, you’ll find out about on your return trip to see
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
F Grousing About
But before we move on to the Bugbear Cairn, let’s get the
most out of these Fairyhaunt Woods. As you’ve probably B
noticed by now, when the Pup starts to growl, you know
a Grouse is near. At this point, ready your Longbow…
and when he yips, stay poised, then fire! A burst of
feathers – and you’ve got game. The Pup will fetch the
bird-corpse and then carry it around in his mouth – have
the Bard make contact with
it and it will automatically
cash in for 8 Silver. Do this
as many times as you see
fit. (And note that if the Pup
A
already has a Grouse in his
To World Map C
mouth, but you’ve come to
another patch of the Woods
where some fowl might be Its life = 1/38th of a Diamond.
+
present, the current Grouse
will automatically cash itself in so the Pup will be free to HUNTING GROUNDS
fetch the new one.) However, if you talk to the Hunter at
the beginning of the Forest again when the Pup has a
Grouse in its mouth, you’ll receive 200 XP, and the
Hunting Grounds will be unlocked on the World Map.
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 3
and Environs BUGBEAR CAIRN Armor: PADDED ARMOR Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
E
Brass Ring (4 SP)
Polished Bones (4 SP) x 2
To Houton
+
Adderstone x 1
BUGBEAR CAIRN
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Traps that will victory will be yours – but behold, all is not what it
spring from the seems… A tricky guy! You’ll receive 250 XP for beating
floor, or arrows him.
that will shoot in
three directions After you stain the faux-fur
from a line of all bloody-like, go back to
BOSS turrets like the
kind you’ve
the town proper and talk to
Daurrad. You’ll receive an
BUGBEAR already encoun- additional 200 XP when you
HP: 200 XP: 200 tered. The Bard talk to him, but depending
will take damage on whether you were Stunned by the fuzz!
ATK: 3d5+3 AC: 1d5+2 if he’s too close, snarky or nice to him, you’ll
In addition to releasing a cloud so just watch receive a varying amount of
of dust that will stun the Bard your position and Silver Pieces. Were you nice
in close quarters, he will concentrate on to Daurrad? You’ll get an
trigger traps around the room. slashing away at appreciative 75 Silver
the Bugbear as Pieces. Were you snarky?
fast as you can. You’ll get 5 Silver Pieces –
Don’t fight him while you’re standing over or in front of about the price of a losing
the traps – his stun powder will paralyze you in the line of lottery ticket or whatever the
danger and you’ll take massive damage. In no time, Houton equivalent is. Daurrad thanks you.
H Springing Ketill
The entrance to Houton Forest is on the other side of
Houton from the Cairn. Take caution and buy some new
armor if you can afford it before going too deep down the
path – gang upon gang of Kunaltrow will spring from the
trees to hack at the Bard and his party. In engaging these
creatures in combat, strike a
defensive posture often, or
try to run around to the
backside of the Kunaltrow –
this is the best way to avoid
getting counter-stabbed if
they chance to deflect your
blows with their shields.
Before long you’ll start And you thought Bannafeet sucked.
leveling up off of these
loons. And it’s not just XP that you’ll receive a lot of here;
sheer material wealth will be yours as well once the dead
Kunaltrow start dropping convert-to-cash items such as
Copper Goblets, Brass Rings, Trow Spears, and Trow
Swords. And hey – be inventive. Use the Pup as bait.
Once you get up to the front of the Jail, make use of the
Save Point, naturally. Then walk up to the door and, with
You thought this guy was an idiot? Wait till Ketill. the kind of response that the Bard might give to the
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 4
and Environs HOUTON FOREST Armor: STUDDED LEATHER Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
D Houton Jail
Snowglobe o’ Houton
D (15 SP)
A
To Houton
+ KUNALTROW (SWORD)
HOUTON FOREST
HP: 25 XP: 20
question, “Bard, what is Depending on ATK: 1d5+2 AC: 0
your favorite swear word?” what goes down
you’ll intone: “Fiddlesnarf.” here, you’ll KUNALTROW (SPEAR)
You’ve just netted 200 XP. either have a
Bannafeet who HP: 25 XP: 25
Once you enter the prison, will give up the
ATK: 1d5+4 AC: 1d4
you’ll be greeted with two Heroine Tune
sword-bearing Kunaltrow, and 200 XP
KUNALTROW (ARCHER)
whom of course you should Only the Bard has felt a fiddle’s narf. upon your return
kill, and then three visit to the HP: 25 XP: 20
prisoners, all of whom claim Fairyhaunt
to be Ketill. There might be Woods (if Ketill ATK: 2d5+2 AC: 0
some contradiction, and you lives), or a
might end up killing off one disgusted KUNALTROW (2-SWORDS)
or both of the men on the Bannafeet who HP: 60 XP: 40
side, but it’s the middle one gives you jack
who turns out to be the guy (that would be ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d4
you want. Pull the three “Ketill dead”).
Only the Bard has felt a fiddle’s narf.
levers six times in any What would I
combination, and you’ll accidentally trigger a trap to suggest? Keep
slaughter one of the three. Repeat the process once Ketill alive, because the Heroine summon will come in big
more, and you’ll kill another. Listen to the directions of handy when you need to start dealing with the Boars in
the one in the middle – this is Ketill – and you’ll success- the upcoming Neversdale Forest.
fully spring him. As long as you listen to his cries, you’ll
keep him alive. If not, well, he might get splattered.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
After you step back into town again, Truncherface will able to get back into town until you’ve recaptured the
come up to you and offer congratulations. He’ll suggest rogue Ketill in Neversdale Forest. If he’s dead, the Sheriff
you meet his brother Bodb (maker of fine stout) in will commend your ineptitude – but it’s still worth going to
Kirkwall, and to help you find it, marks the town on your Neversdale, as this is the place to which Bannafeet has
map – your first real reason fled.
to venture out onto the
World Map. Truncherface
will then hand over 5
Adderstones.
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CHAPTER 1: HOUTON Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 4
and Environs HOUTON FOREST Armor: STUDDED LEATHER Summon: THUNDER SPIDER
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Journey to Neversdale to capture Ketill Swart. ...OR... Journey to Neversdale to find Ketill’s hideout.
Neversdale is a small, mushroom-pocked forest, marked Why are Treasure Maps so exciting? The short answer is
on the World Map by Mr. Swart’s hideout/treehouse. Of because they contain treasure; the long answer is because
course it’s vital for you to bring back Ketill Swart if you they contain treasure you’ll never see otherwise. Sure
ever want to get in the good graces of Sheriff Rucky again they’re “dear,” but each of the Extra Dungeons holds, in
(if such a thing, frankly, is addition to some fine silvery baubles, a Token you’re not
even possible) – or, if you’ve going to find anywhere else. So take a chance on a Map
already murdered the purchase every now and
scamp, vital for you to track then; indeed, try and save
down Bannafeet and up some money specifically
procure that damned Tune for the purchase of a
from the goblinoid wretch – Treasure Map as often as
while taking the time to you’re able. And get your
plunder the treasure from Not much of a hike to N’dale. map-purchase pacing right –
Ketill’s hideout, Rucky having given you the tip on such. after Chapter 10, for
Regardless of which outcome you’ve put into place, it’s example, the first one will Deal with a schlemiel.
evident that the Bard has no loyalties, so mince off to no longer be available in
Destination Neversdale for a couple of ill-gotten laughs. Houton, for various reasons you’ll discover later on. If
you want the full scoop on these Extra Dungeons, look no
But who’s that, out on the World Map prairies? It looks further than the Secrets section of this volume.
like a Trow to be sure, but a slighter, more malnourished
specimen than the kind that usually harasses you in these
parts. Saunter up to him, and as you step out onto the
kind of field that would normally take the form of a
“random encounter combat
zone,” prepare yourself
instead to play a game of
“Catch the Trow.” Once you TROW MAPS
get your mitts on this Treasure Map 2 4000 SP
jokester, he’ll fess up that Treasure Map 3 4000 SP
he’s got some wonderful Treasure Map 4 4000 SP
wares for sale – the four
Treasure Maps that, with the Treasure Map 5 4000 SP
Talk to me, Trowbaby.
pricier one for sale at
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CHAPTER 2: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 5
NEVERSDALE FOREST NEVERSDALE FOREST Armor: STUDDED LEATHER Summon: HEROINE
Ketill’s
Hideout D
E F G
J I
KUNALTROW (SWORD)
Piskey’s
H HP: 25 XP: 20
Ferry ATK: 1d5 AC: 0
A B KUNALTROW (ARCHER)
HP: 25 XP: 20
ATK: 2d5+2 AC: 0
KUNALTROW (2-SWORDS)
HP: 50 XP: 50
B Treasure Amid Fungus ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d4
As you can see, Treasure Chests abound in Neversdale Forest. There are lots
of desirable monetary confections, but once you start heading north, across the BOAR
river, you’ll find some items you won’t want to be without – like the Buckler, HP: 30 XP: 20
the Eagle Charm Token (+1 Rhythm), the Badger Hide Gloves (+1 Strength)
and the Crone Tune. Periodically healing the Bard, the Crone is ace. ATK: 3d5+8 AC: 1d2+1
BOAR-RIDER
HP: 40 XP: 20
ATK: 4d5+15 AC: 2d5+1
Adderstone x 1
C Trow Pants (8 SP) G 200 Silver Pieces
I Beer Bottle (4 SP) x 2
Token: Badger Hide
D Adderstone x 1 H Gloves J Trow Sword (8 SP)
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Neversdale Forest is the first chapter of the game that A few words on leveling up, before I proceed any further.
includes Boars (not counting the random encounters out When you eventually hit Level 5, you should absolutely
on the World Map), and it turns out that Boars are packs pick the Heavy Parry talent – coupled with the Two-
of nogoodniks. The frat-brothers of the animal kingdom, Handed Weapon talent (which will allow you to wield the
Boars will attack our intrepid Claymore and any other two-handed weapon), you’ll be
musician-poet with a high- able to perform an automatic counter-attack whenever
speed charge that takes off you block (or, rather, “parry”) a blow while a two-hander’s
quite a few digits from the equipped. If you think this comes in handy now, just wait
old HP. Use the Pup and till you take on the packs of Large Wolves at Finn’s Farm
the Heroine (if you’ve saved in the next chapter…
Ketill!) to draw their charge,
and then attack with a hand-
held weapon from their Full of crashing boars.
flank or their rear. Don’t let more than two at a time get
D Ketill, Won / Ketill: None
onto the screen at once – it’s too much to handle. Inch Now back to the matter at hand: Ketill. (If he’s still alive,
forward then draw back. that is.) Ignore his taunting from the edge of the porch,
gather up your mettle, and then enter the hideout to
The only way to get across recapture the swine – he’s easy enough to take out. Just
the stream to the northern remember whenever he blocks one of your jabs to hit the
portion of the Forest is to parry button right away, as he’ll definitely have a counter-
take Chubnik’s ferry. When attack in the works. It’s all about the timing. You’ll get
you speak to this cretinous 300 XP for beating him. By all means, loot that place –
Trow, keep giving him and pick up the
Snarky responses so that aforementioned
you don’t have to pay. He’ll Eagle Charm and
try and wring you out of 15 “How about no silver pieces?” Crone Tune. Also,
SP first, then he’ll lower his 200 Silver Pieces.
sailing rate to 10 SP, and
finally he’ll do you the favor If you’ve already
of giving you the ride free of
charge. Cross the river.
killed Ketill,
Bannafeet will be
BOSS
quivering inside the KETILL SWART
After you cross, you’re going room like the HP: 100 XP: 300
to meet Ogan – at the legume-looking ATK: 3d5+5 AC: 1d5
moment of some pretty chump he is and
grim circumstances Neither junk nor dinghy. start to teleport Ketill, being a common rogue,
unleashing themselves upon the would-be Chosen One. around, throwing doesn’t have any skills of note.
Don’t forget to go back to Ogan’s mum’s house next time out verbal barbs to He’s simply quick and good
you’re back in Houton and break her off the black math. the effect of, “You with a pocket knife.
Once this cut-scene subsides, you’ll be attacked by a have used a sword
group of Kunaltrow, including the never before seen before, right?” As
Kunaltrow Witch Doctor, soon as you pull out your
who can cast a spell that will Bow, the little gonad will
temporarily bring the Bard’s surrender, handing over the
Luck down 10 points. You’ll Heroine Tune at long last
find that statistics at play or and bequeathing you 300
not, this “attack” has little XP.
real effect. After the battle,
go near Ogan and press the After you’re done at the
button while standing near Hideout, head directly south
A roguish collection agency. Take that. And that, too.
his person to “collect your where a pair of valuable
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CHAPTER 2: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 5
NEVERSDALE FOREST NEVERSDALE FOREST Armor: STUDDED LEATHER Summon: HEROINE
Badger Hide Gloves sit inside of a chest – but beware: Once you bring Ketill back to
there are Boar-Riding Kunaltrow in this area. These are town, the Sheriff will take
probably the most savage enemy you’ll have faced up to him off your hands. And
this point. The Badger Hide Gloves should help out a tad, give you 200 XP. If Ketill
if you can get to the chest – they’ll give you a Strength +1 was killed back in the Jail,
and count as a Token. you don’t get a thing except
a Sheriff with a more docile
With these goons disposed attitude.
of, head toward Piskey and His hiding spot if he runs.
his little ferry-service. You’ll While back in town, report
have to pay 105 Silver to get what you’ve seen to Ogan’s
across if you were snarky to mum; if you’re nice to her
Chubnik; if nice, it’s free. twice, telling her you
avenged Ogan, you’ll receive
Once you get across the the Rabbit’s Foot Token
river, you’ll be greeted by If a key could piss: Piskey. (Luck + 1) and 200 XP. If
the insufferable Fnarf and you’re any other combi-
his merry band of Kunaltrow. Ketill (if he’s survived nation, you’ll receive a
Houton Jail) will ask if you can free him – if you’re snarky, thanks and 300 XP, but no Grief personified.
he’ll stay tied up. If you’re nice, he’ll end up helping you Rabbit’s Foot.
out a bit and then abandoning you toward the end of the
fight. It pays to be nice, even if he does end up betraying
you – he’ll be very helpful in drawing some of the enemy
attack for the amount of time he sticks around – if it’s just
you on your lonesome, things can get really really hairy.
(Protip: Make sure
you save at the
save point here.)
Defeat Fnarf – who
is in effect a very
strong Kunal
Archer – and you’ll
receive 350 XP.
With Ketill having
BOSS
run off, of course, FNARF
you need to go HP: 100 XP: 0
after him, if you’re ATK: 2d6+5 AC: 2d5
ever to be allowed
back into Houton Fnarf is a tough little bugger,
again. Find him in but it’s his aptitude with the
the southeast Longbow that smarts the most.
portion of Stay close to him!
Neversdale Forest
South. You’ll
receive 300 XP more for
finding him! If Ketill was
killed back in the Jail, it’s just
you alone to take on Fnarf
and his band – don’t run too
far south or you’ll draw even
more enemies into joining
the fray. Stick close to the
And all hell breaks loose! Ketill’s hideout – will the locals turn it into a museum?
creek.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Find the right Bodb. Learn about this Princess. Get the Magic Bell from Farmer Finn. Find Conner
and convince him to win back Farmer’s Daughter.
the midst of the song and dance routine, they’ll turn over
A Bodbin’ for Bodbs the Light Fairy Tune, and you’ll be given 350 XP. They
tell you to go inside and
Upon walking into town you’ll be greeted by a young there, behind four barrels,
woman who asks/declares you’ll discover a passage,
that surely you remember which you should of course
her – don’t you, dashing enter to find what you’re
Bard? If you’re nice, she looking for. Go inside this
freaks, if you’re snarky, she Storage Room – and you’ll
keeps it together. Needless find it’s absolutely pitch
to say, you haven’t seen the black. This is where your
last of her… new Light Fairy summon Bodbershop quartet?
One-night-stand-off’ish’ness. comes in. Play this tune,
Kirkwall: City of Invalids. Or and you’ll have an illumi-
so it would seem once you encounter Bodb, and Bodb, nating friend show up and
and Bodb, and... well, let me explain. Go to the northeast light up the room. Head
and talk to, um, Bodb. Be towards the rear and you’ll
snarky, not nice, and he’ll see the four barrels blocking
respect your “conviction,” the way. Behind those
and then lead you to barrels lies the way to The
another Bodb nearby. (If Hidden Bluff.
Turn on your mothlight.
you’re nice, he’ll keep
brushing you off until at last
you relent and give him
some sass.) Follow him,
The first of the Bodb brigade.
and then talk to the new
Bodb. The same applies for But in what
this one; be nice to him, and capacity can a
you’ll essentially be told to pipe-smoking
be on your way and find the fairy be
other Bodb for yourself. Be trusted?
snarky, and you’ll be taken
to him. A third Bodb, and
then a fourth Bodb – they’ll
lead you to a door and their
“Hey Bodb.” “Hi Bodb.”
singing will open it up. In
24 primagames.com
CHAPTER 3: KIRKWALL Segment: Weapon: CALADBOLG Level: 5
and Environs Suggested...
TOWN OF KIRKWALL Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: LIGHT FAIRY
Leather Armor 400 SP B
Studded Leather 800 SP To The A
Chainmail 2600 SP Hidden Bluff Bodb 1
Buckler 800 SP
Targ Shield 2500 SP
To Shop Bodb 2
INSTRUMENTS Pub+Kirk
Finn’s Farm
Harp 750 SP
Bodb 3 To World Map
To
Finn’s Farm Bodb 4
A Token: Falstone
B Tune: Bodyguard
TOWN OF KIRKWALL
primagames.com 25
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Temple
To
To Highland Kirkwall
Park
Kirkwall
To
Cerebral Summit ‘04
26 primagames.com
CHAPTER 3: KIRKWALL Segment: Weapon: GREAT BOW Level: 6
and Environs Suggested...
THE HIDDEN BLUFF Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: LIGHT FAIRY, HEROINE
distance, and, more expensive, the Chainmail. You can when you take into account the fact that, like a smaller
also get the Harp and increase the number of summons Wolf, the last remaining Large Wolf in the pack will do his
you can have out at once to part to summon more Large
two (in addition to having Wolves. And repeat, repeat,
twice the Mana to play with repeat, ad nauseum. He’ll
now). Draw out the Heroine keep summoning more
and the Light Fairy, and compatriots until you put an
you’re game to take on end to his life, of course –
these Wolves. The Light that is, strike him before he
Fairy, after all, doesn’t just unlooses his howl. Mighty
have the one talent of illumi- convenient that there’s a
Ponce. Dual Wield in action.
nating dark spaces – it will Save Point here, I might add.
also let out a periodic light
burst that will stun all Now off to do a little investi-
enemies onscreen for a gating. Head over to the
couple moments. Pull out east of the circle of stones
the Claymore, and really tear and you’ll find another “Ex-
them up; sure, it’s a two- Chosen One.” Loot the
handed sword and so a little bugger and you’ll be treated
slower than the Caladbolg, to another Trow Musical
but it packs a wallop. The worst mind of our generation. Revue. You’ll get 250 XP for
Alternatively, you can use a your gumption, and some Another ex-Chosen One.
combo of a Dirk and a Caladbolg, if you have the Dual Oak Leaf Armor worth 100 Silver Pieces from the
Wield talent, to do a nice and graceful carve-up job on cadaver. No, this rotted stuff can’t compare to your stylin’
these mongrels. Needless to say, this little patch of farm Chainmail.
is a lovely place to get some much desired XP – especially
Head further south to the pasture and you’ll meet Finn, “a
bitter old coot.” Be snarky and he’ll say you can just have
the Magic Bell. Of course, then things will take an
unwelcome turn and the old
love interest will come
running out, saying you took
advantage of her that one
night not so many moons
ago. Well, with that, all
things go to piss with the
Bell, and now you’ve got to
find someone to win back A snarky old codger.
her heart. Namely, Conner.
We’ll return to this scenario momentarily...
primagames.com 27
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Narrator will
D Scarecrow Tactics suggest, should
you knock him
Now on the other hand... you can be nice to Finn, and down, “Let –
and he’ll tell you to come with him… Follow him and he’ll Conner – Win.”
explain to you that you can Allow Conner to
have the Bell if you clean off pummel the Bard
the Crows from his to the point of CROW
Scarecrows. Sounds easy near-death, and
the Farmer’s HP: 0 XP: 0
enough. But after you (or
more easily, your Heroine Daughter will go ATK: 0 AC: 0
summon) start to pick off away with him,
the Crows perched up on impressed… and SCARECROW
top of the Scarecrows via It starts with crows... you’ll earn 300 HP: 90 XP: 100
some nicely targeted XP. (P.S. – Try
arrows… the Scarecrows summoning a Rat ATK: 3d5+15 AC: 0
come to life. And they are in the pub for 50
nasty bastards. Use your SP and 275 XP; it
Claymore if you’re feeling makes up for winning nothing if you’re nice to Conner.)
risky, but otherwise, just Finn will now tell you the Bell is yours – around the neck
stand at a distance and pluck of an old crazy horse in the pasture.
away at your Great Bow, in
tandem with the shots being
fired by your Heroine
summon. They’ll go down
...and turns into this.
F Ornery, Not Onery
easily after a couple hits. Of The Ornery Old Horse isn’t
course they won’t go out that difficult to defeat, as
without a fight – they’ll also long as you’ve got your
cast a fear spell that will trusty Claymore equipped.
cause your summons to run It’s just the Wolves and
away or, if the summons are Large Wolves in the vicinity
at the periphery of the spell’s that make it something of a
range, will stun them. Keep your distance with a bow. trial. They’re as interested
in pecking at this Horse as The Bard suffers from foot-in-mouth.
you are, and as a
result, they’ll help
E This Conner Business you do damage to
it. The Horse isn’t
Per his request, when you’re done, go by Finn’s house – much in the way
you’ll get 300 XP. … And you’re right back to where you of danger – you
would have been if you’d been snarky to Finn from the won’t take too too
onset. The dame will now run out and bitch.
Just go back into Kirkwall and follow the yellow goal spot
much damage
from its angry
BOSS
on your map – where else to flailing. Kill the ORNERY OLD HORSE
find a former-betrothed Horse, and the
HP: 350 XP: 200
than… the pub. Walk into Farmer will come
The Fat Lute, and go over to out and complain ATK: 3d5+2 AC: 0
Conner. If you’re nice, he’ll about the mess –
but so what, the
Except for his erratic motions,
go to Finn’s without a fight; if the Ornery Old Horse is
you’re snarky, he’ll start to Magic Bell is generally pretty static. He’s
swing – don’t fight back. If yours, as is 300 target practice.
you do, he’ll just keep XP.
Kah-blooey.
getting up. As the faithful
28 primagames.com
CHAPTER 3: KIRKWALL Segment: Weapon: GREAT BOW Level: 6
and Environs Suggested...
FINN’S FARM Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: HEROINE
primagames.com 29
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
G On to New Calamities On to the Bodbs – go back to the Temple, and hand over
the Magic Bell. After some typical Bodb-ine lollygagging,
Time to head back to the Bodbs to drop off the Magic the Princess Caleigh will tell you that before you can do
Bell. First stop inside of Kirkwall proper and walk to the much to save her, you need to find a lute in the
northeast of the easternmost possession of some rank
Storage Room. There you’ll and wily Kunaltrow hiding
find two gentlemen who tell out in the nearby Highland
you a reward is waiting for Park. You’ll be given ample
you at Finstown, and unlock favors by the Princess
the place on your World afterward, most surely, but
Map. If you venture out for the time being try and
onto the World Map to see focus on your present
Finstown now, you’ll find it’s The Hero of Finstown! mission. Follow the Bodbs The walk to the park.
marked Chapter IX of the outside of the Temple, and
story – the “fiery welcome” will probably do enough on its they’ll unlock the nearby gate… to Highland Park.
own to dissuade you from tackling this place just yet
anyway. Take the hint of the chapter header, and don’t
try tackling this till, say, six chapters down the line.
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CHAPTER 3: KIRKWALL Segment: Weapon: GREAT BOW Level: 6
and Environs Suggested...
THE HIDDEN BLUFF Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: HEROINE
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Find Fnarf and get the instrument from him. Return to Bodb in Kirkwall.
(If you’re snarky with Mell, he’ll just wait for you to be
A The Passion of Mell nice. And you ain’t going anywhere without Mell, as
you’ll see soon enough.) Basically all you need to do
How refreshing this will be! Fresh woodland air and a here is to defeat the Hammer-Tossing Kunaltrows – use
wonderful day for a gallavant. Mildred? Oi, Mildred, your Great Bow and/or summon your trusty Heroine, and
you’re a Trow. Shortly after you talk with the Trow sitting you’ll be able to peck off the Trow from the lower ground
in the Park’s opening grove, an old familiar friend will level on which you and Mell reside. (Tangential question:
come into the fray and As hard up as the Bard is for some action, what’s
cause just as much trouble stopping him from summoning some of his female pals –
for you this time as he did okay, maybe not ones like the Crone, but let’s say the
the first time around. “Let Heroine – and sliding into home? Maybe nothing –
the educational experience neither you nor I can tell what goes on in that memory
begin!” he cries out – but if card when you’re at work or class. Might it not be that
you have your Caladbolg when the console’s turned
and Dirk double-equipped off, the Bard is turned on?)
with the Dual Wield talent, Hello. Okay, so anyway, when the
you’re going to be the one two Trow here die, the
playing teacher, or master energy gate will dissipate
and servant, or whatever it (thanks to a certain Mell
is you’re best at. Slaughter making a noisome buzz – by
all the Trow and you can throwing himself headlong
proceed onward. into the field) and you can Gad-zoinks!!!
proceed.
The eastern gate will open
after the melee subsides. In
past the threshold you’ll find Goodbye.
a mad old josser who goes
by the name of Mell. He
says he’ll help you get past
the electrified energy gates
that cordon off the various
sections of the park path
further east, then up north,
and so on. Be nice to him
and he’ll show you the way
Itchin’ for a Mell-tdown.
– to the best of his abilties.
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CHAPTER 4: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: GREAT BOW Level: 8
HIGHLAND PARK HIGHLAND PARK Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: HEROINE, BODYGUARD
Ex-Chosen One
E A
D
Fnarf
Battle 1
C
KUNALTROW (SWORD)
HP: 25 XP: 20
ATK: 1d5 AC: 0
KUNALTROW (SPEAR)
HP: 25 XP: 25
B ATK: 1d5+4 AC: 1d4
KUNALTROW (ARCHER)
You’ll note that Mell’s “Fear Factor” counts down at the top of the screen – this HP: 30 XP: 40
is the amount of time that you have until Mell loses his wits and runs back to ATK:4d5+10 AC: 1d4
the beginning. Seeing as the Factor counts down from the two-minute mark,
you’ll have plenty of time to dispose of the Trow. Just make sure you do – KUNALTROW (HAMMER)
because although you can always backtrack, find Mell, and tell him to rejoin,
the energy gates will also reset and you’ll have to pick off the Kunaltrow all HP: 30 XP: 40
over again. Note that once you destroy a wave of Trow, when it comes to the ATK:2d5+20 AC: 1d4
next wave, Mell’s Fear Factor will
reset to the two minute mark. BOAR-RIDER
Note number two: If you get far
along the path and a point comes HP: 40 XP: 20
where Mell’s Fear Factor hits zero, 100 Silver Pieces ATK: 4d5+15 AC: 2d5+1
he’ll only backtrack a little bit; he A Glaisne
won’t hightail it all the way back to
the beginning. So you can find
Adderstone x 1
Tune: Upgraded Rat
(continued next page) B Brass Ring (4 SP)
Copper Goblet (4 SP)
Silver Candlestick (1 SP)
50 Silver Pieces
C Jeweled Bracelet (60 SP)
E Copper Goblet (4 SP)
Adderstone x 1 Adderstone x 1
2-Handed Sword (20 SP) 200 Silver Pieces
D Brass Ring (8 SP) F Ruby (100 SP)
Adderstone x 1
Adderstone x 1
Fear is definitely a factor.
primagames.com 33
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
him again relatively easily. Now, getting back to business: Once you get to the northern
Bring out the Bodyguard and the Heroine as your two clearing, you’re going to be
summons for the rest of the Park. encountering a lot of Two-
Sworded Trow, and hear the
Once you get past the first several energy gates and start sound of some magic-like
to encounter the Boar-Riding Trows, it might be a better teleportation going on.
idea to switch to a Melee Weapon and get in close, to deal Welcome to Fnarf Country.
the heaviest damage in the shortest amount of time. It’s a bloody battle, so make
ProTip: Lead the Boar-Riding sure you’ve got the Heroine The power of the fire arrow.
Trows into the cobblestone out and the Crone too, for
“thruways”, where they’ll that matter. After you do
have no room to charge some serious slaughter,
around you and your party Fnarf will warp away.
from another angle. The Continue westward. But
Boar-Riders will be hemmed watch out. The first patch of
in like (not even “like”) boars enemies after this section
between arches, and you Hemming in the Boar-Riders. (that is, the group of Trow
can eradicate them from the just south of the save point)
face of Bard-earth. have some serious ammo in And the speed of the Rat.
reserve – the combat will get hairier than the Pup’s bung,
so make sure you weave in and out to the best of your
B Deadest Boy in the Park abilities, let the Heroine rip her arrows, and fire your own
Glaisne when you have a chance. As you near the
In the northeast part of the park, you’ll come upon yet halfway mark to the southernmost part of this corridor, it’s
another Ex-Chosen One, much to the Bard’s chagrin. On a good idea to switch to a melee weapon each time Mell
the corpse of this gutted electrocutes himself against a barrier, as there tend to be a
pauper you’ll find 100 Silver wave of sword-wielding Trows in front of the ones who
Pieces, 385 XP (well, you are hurling hammers and cabers. Specifically, the
won’t find the XP on his Claymore, which has an easier time hacking through the
corpse per se; they probably highly block-adept Two-Sword Kunaltrow.
come with the smell) and a
new weapon – the Glaisne,
a powerful bow that will
replace your current ranged Happiness in plundering.
weapon – and which shoots
fire arrows. What’s so great about fire arrows? The
fact that when they hit their target, said target will
burn up, and incrementally receive more damage
across the second or two they stay aflame.
When you get to the next bend – you’ll receive
a great little treasure for your troubles –
some monetary junk, an Adderstone
(which, lets face it, has a little less
thrill-value to it now that
you’ve got the Crone
healing your ass for free), and a
new Tune – the Upgraded Rat, or
as they call him in Jersey, the
Vorpal Rat. This might look the same as your earlier
Rat – but it will slay those Trows… at least, it has a
better chance than it used to, what with a new, more
competent velocity.
34 primagames.com
CHAPTER 4: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: GLAISNE Level: 8
HIGHLAND PARK HIGHLAND PARK Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: HEROINE, CRONE
(By the way: if you’re wondering what a caber is, I’m here gratitude – The Mercenary. This squat little fellow is the
to tell you: It’s a massive log-sized piece of wood hurled obvious, but perfect, thing you’ve been missing from your
by competitors in the traditional Scottish Highland games. summon roster so far – a close-quarters, down-and-dirty,
Whoever throws it farthest wins. I can already hear you competent melee combatant. You’ll be calling upon the
asking, But has anyone ever pierced a caber-thrower’s aide of this angry dwarf until the end of your adventures, I
guts with arrowheads in mid-toss? To which I answer: Of guarantee. Treat him with
course! It’s Scotland!) respect, Bardolator!
primagames.com 35
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Go to the Forest Tower and defeat the Tower Guardian. Find Bodb in Kirkwall.
36 primagames.com
CHAPTER 5: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: GLAISNE Level: 8
THE FOREST TOWER THE FOREST TOWER Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
To
Level 1
B
LARGE WOLF
HP: 55 XP: 50
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d2
To World
Diamond (300 SP) Map
B Adderstone x 2
THE FOREST TOWER GROVE
primagames.com 37
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
BLUE PLANT
HP: 20 XP: 40
ATK: N/A AC: 0
RED PLANT
HP: 30 XP: 40
ATK: N/A AC: 0
YELLOW PLANT
HP: 25/30 XP: 60/40
ATK: VARIES AC: 0
38 primagames.com
CHAPTER 5: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: GLAISNE Level: 8
THE FOREST TOWER LEVEL 1 Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
C D
A To
To Grove
Level 2
primagames.com 39
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Now head back south, taking out all the Plants along the As you make your way further through this trap infested
way – but watch out – as you hit the south thruway bog of a dungeon (you’re probably a ripe old witness to
coming out of the loop, the anguish right about
you’ll face a rolling Boulder now), and hit the
Trap that will hurtle your westernmost part of the
way, until its path culminates level, you have the choice of
in exploding into a wall to taking one of two paths
the north – stay as far on the northward. Take the
east side of the screen as western path. There are
you can. In addition, there’s only enemies here,
another Spike Trap just Rolling, rolling, rolling... compared to a veritable This is a harmless vine...
underneath one of the gauntlet of traps on the east
carnivorous Plants in this (see the map on the
area, so try and attack from previous page if you don’t
a distance, or with the believe me), with no upside
flaming bolts of your at all. At the very top of the
Glaisne. westernmost path there’s a
chest with 100 Silver Pieces
As you progress west along inside – just wait for the
the corridor, you’ll come Boulder to come rolling out
...IMPACT! ...and this is a Vine Trap.
upon a Treasure Chest which first before you cave in to
holds some nice SP’age in addition to a new Tune – the your own avarice. Speaking of traps – the Vine Traps
Explorer. What’s the purpose of this wee decrepit along the way, which of course you see clearly marked on
personage? For starters, he’ll run directly toward any the map – you have to keep an eye out for these things,
traps in the vicinity and throw himself right into the Jimmy! Don’t confuse the
danger, triggering it (in the large, thick vines (which are
case of Spike Traps) or harmless) with the deadly
temporarily staving off the ones (which are the small,
trap’s fury (in the case of more tightly wound thin
Crushers that might spring ones). Refer to screenshots.
from a wall). You’ll be able
to see where the trap is At long last you’ll come to
located quite easily using this the staircase for Level 2. Go
The way up to Level 2.
method; of course, the little Good news! He’s found a trap! up.
man will take some damage.
But hey, if he croaks, just
resummon. He’ll also put
up something like a fight in
C Forest Tower, Level 2
combat (keywords: When you come upon the first place that the path forks in
“something,” “like”). As I Level 2, take the easternmost route to avoid a Spike Trap
see it, there’s one drawback and a Vine Trap. There will be killer Plants no matter
to having this goof mucking where you go, of course, so get used to committing
about at your side. If you herbicide. Once you get past this easy fight, equip your
Can’t see the Bard? He’s been CRUSHED.
approach a chest, he’ll run Glaisne. There are a ton of thorns set to sail your way
right up to it and pop the lid, then scramble around and from the bastard Plants.
collect its contents. It’s not that “he keeps the treasure” or
anything – it all goes right to you as though you had Other than that, there’s not a lot more on this level that
picked it up yourself. It’s just that you might not even be you haven’t already seen on the prior one. Just keep your
aware of what he’s doing, and before you know it, Silver eyeball on the map here so you know what kinds of traps
Pieces are hitting your purse, an image of Trow Pants to expect. When you finally approach the staircase to
comes flying on the screen, and you’ve got a new dirk. In Level 3 – don’t go rushing up just yet. Take your time to
a nutshell, I keep the Explorer away from treasure, but go east and pick up the treasure sitting there.
this is just my own preference.
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CHAPTER 5: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: GLAISNE Level: 9
THE FOREST TOWER LEVEL 2 Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, EXPLORER
B
(upon
descent)
(upon
descent)
(upon
descent)
To
D
To
Level 3 Level 1
A
C
primagames.com 41
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
42 primagames.com
CHAPTER 5: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 11
THE FOREST TOWER LEVEL 3 & HERNE Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, CRONE
BOSS
HERNE B Crannderg
HP: 400 XP: 300
ATK: 4d5+10 AC: 1d5+1 Ruby (100 SP)
C Mistletoe (8 SP)
The Herne Artifact! He’ll strike you from up-close,
he’ll blast you wtih poison gas,
he’ll summon roots to bind 350 Silver Pieces
you, he’ll summon Plants. D Stonehenge Keepsake (12 SP)
To Herne’s
A
To Chamber
D
Level 2 (upon
B descent)
C
(upon
descent)
primagames.com 43
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
44 primagames.com
CHAPTER 5: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 12
THE FOREST TOWER TOWN OF KIRKWALL Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Devastated.
Bodb
Shop
To World
Map
CU SITH
HP: 100 XP: 50
ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 0
TOWN OF KIRKWALL
primagames.com 45
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Travel to the Mountain Tower through the Mountain Pass. Find the Trow’s sword to remove the
curse. Locate the stones needed to open the locked doors, and find the way out of the Tomb.
46 primagames.com
CHAPTER 6: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 12
THE MOUNTAIN PASS THE MOUNTAIN PASS Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
C D Frozen
To The
River
KUNALTROW (SWORD)
HP: 25 XP: 20
A ATK: 1d5 AC: 0
KUNALTROW (SPEAR)
To World Map
HP: 25 XP: 25
THE MOUNTAIN PASS ATK: 1d5+4 AC: 1d4
KUNALTROW (ARCHER)
HP: 25 XP: 20
ATK: 2d5+2 AC: 0
KUNALTROW (2-SWORDS)
HP: 60 XP: 40
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d4
KUNALTROW (WITCH DOC)
HP: 50 XP: 50
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d4
WOLF
HP: 20 XP: 20
ATK: 1d5 AC: 0
LARGE WOLF
HP: 55 XP: 50
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d2
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KUNALTROW (ARCHER)
HP: 25 XP: 20 D
ATK: 2d5+2 AC: 0 To The
KUNALTROW (2-SWORDS) Frozen Tombs
HP: 60 XP: 40
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d4
BOAR-RIDER C
HP: 40 XP: 20
ATK: 4d5+15 AC: 2d5+1
LARGE WOLF
HP: 55 XP: 50
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d2
B
FINFOLK
From The Mountain Pass
HP: 200 XP: 350
ATK: 7d5+10 AC: 1d5
A
THE FROZEN RIVER
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Weapon: CASGAIR Level: 12
THE MOUNTAIN PASS THE MOUNTAIN PASS Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, EXPLORER
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CHAPTER 6: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CASGAIR Level: 12
THE MOUNTAIN PASS THE MOUNTAIN PASS Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Gower
H
To World
Map
E
D G
LOCK
To Burial ICE
Chamber
ICE C
LOCK
ICE
LOCK
LOCK
B F
Abandoned ICE
Camp
A Dolyn
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
ProNote: Red rays bursting so you can go up to a chamber containing a save point
from a Draugr’s midsection is and a Golden Chalice worth 200 Silver Pieces. As you
a sign that he’s at 50% can see, “Hrafn’s Kills” are marked at the top of the
health or below and now in screen. Once this gets to 25, you’ll warp back to his
Berserker Mode. Both his chamber, and be given the following: the Tune for the
attack speed and damage are Elemental, the Jeweled Flute (which allows you to have
now increased – real swell. three summons out at once), the Royal Stone (another
(This occurs later on with keystone), and 880 XP. Wow! Now head south toward
Vikings as well.) Raiding the camp. the ice barriers. As you’ll see, when the Fire Elemental
gets near the frozen soldiers, they’ll instantly melt and
Examine the nearby camp – you’ll get 550 XP for your attack. It’s a bit hellish but
inquisitiveness, have Dounby unlocked on your World worth it when you see you
Map, and obtain a new object, the Raven Stone, which, can now also melt ice
like Finn’s Magic Bell, will not show up in your inventory – walls. Melt the one in front
it’s not a Token, it’s a key for that locked door in the main of the chamber that you
chamber. Return to that main chamber (or is it a couldn’t access earlier, fight
“foyer”?), and go through the door to the Burial Chamber. off the Draugr, and hit the
treasure chest to get flush –
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Weapon: CASGAIR Level: 12
THE MOUNTAIN PASS THE MOUNTAIN PASS Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Hrafn
ICE
ICE
ICE B
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CHAPTER 7: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 14
THE MOUNTAIN TOWER MOUNTAIN TOWER GROVE Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
The Mountain
Tower is the
second tower of
the three... You’re
getting closer...
Level
To
1
C
B
approx. 250 Silver Pieces
Pearl (80 SP)
A 2-Handed Sword (30 SP)
Adderstone x 1
A
approx. 300 Silver Pieces
Cathbad C Jeweled Bracelet (60 SP)
To World Map
THE MOUNTAIN TOWER GROVE
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
LUGH FIGHTER
HP: 40 XP: 90
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 2d3+3
ARMORED BOAR
HP: 75 XP: 50
ATK: 6d5+25 AC: 2d3
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CHAPTER 7: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 15
THE MOUNTAIN TOWER LEVEL 1 Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Ancient Bracelet
A (300 SP)
Adderstone x 3
The ground level ain’t so bad, but once you start going up...
To
Level 2
To Mountain
Tower Grove
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CHAPTER 7: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CRANNDERG Level: 15
THE MOUNTAIN TOWER LEVEL 2 Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, EXPLORER
To
Level 1
E C
To
Level 3
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It’s an onslaught
F Druidic Descent like you wouldn’t
believe when you DRUID (STAFF)
Guess who’s back? The Druids. But now that you’re all step outdoor HP: 60 XP: 75
grown up (sort of) they’re not so hard to handle anymore. (replete with Cu ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 1d5
You’ll notice the shaking of the screen as you and your Sith) so immedi-
party progress downward: this is a bad sign – the tower is ately summon
falling to pieces. Summon the Knight and give him a Lugh and you’ll
DRUID (SCYTHE)
whirl to check out his power against enemies. Then carve right HP: 110 XP: 175
examine some of your other new goodies – if you try out through all the ATK: 5d5+10 AC: 1d5
Lugh’s Artifact, you’ll summon forth the man himself to enemies in a
grant you (with his Level 1 power alone) spinning axes, splended fit of
which will surround your person; you’ll retain these for mayhem. Leave
CU SITH
around thirty seconds. This is a great item. Additionally, this place, and HP: 100 XP: 50
the save point that was the first one when you came up is enter East ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 0
no longer there on Level 3. On Level 2 you’ll start to Dounby.
encounter some scythe-wielding Druids, too.
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Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 17
THE MOUNTAIN TOWER LEVEL 3 Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
E
To Lugh’s
Chamber
To
Level 2 A
D B
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Meet Dugan in the Aiken Drum. Carry out errands for Jean and Jacques, and for
their clientele.
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CHAPTER 8: DOUNBY Segment: Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 18
and Environs Suggested...
EAST DOUNBY Armor: CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
To
)
Sheriff World Map
DRUID (STAFF)
HP: 60 XP: 75
ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 1d5
(
To The
Caltir
DRUID (SCYTHE)
Old City
HP: 110 XP: 175
Druid ATK: 5d5+10 AC: 1d5
Reynard Guardpost
Brothers DRUID (SICKLES)
HP: 85/150 XP: 90/250
(
To West
ATK: VARIES AC: VARIES
Dounby
EAST DOUNBY
cellar door that’s slightly ajar – you’ll find out it goes down receive 880 XP, for, um, kind of completing your task.
into “The Old City.” Hold off from here until you can get Now go to Caltir, – be nice to her, and return once more
into West Dounby and power-up with some new to the two frères. Once the Bard is rough with them,
weapons from O’Dell’s. they’ll hand over a Tune (the
Knocker) and 1100 XP.
(Note: Try summoning the
B Les frères curieux Knocker in front of the bro’s
to see what happens; you’ll
Gaelic meets Gallic in the house of the Reynard brothers – take in another 1100 XP.)
you’ll find this odd confection just north of West Dounby’s After taking care of this,
threshold. The wily brothers head to the goal marker on
(and indeed, “reynard” is Old your map, and enter West Merci pour le chocolat.
French for “fox”) will give Dounby.
you the rather sordid task of
shaking down the keeps-to-
himself guy you met earlier,
Donnan, for the amount of
50 Silvers. (At least, they’ll
readily hand over this info to Bon soir, salauds.
you if you’re nice to them.)
If you go to Donnan and are in turn nice to him, he’ll tell
you that Jean and Jacques owe HIM money. Return to
the Reynard brothers, explain to them what Donnan told
you, and they’ll tell you about a Silver Frog over at Caltir’s
place which needs reclaiming. It’s at this point that you’ll
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Go to O’Dell’s and Come home to Dounby – where there’s always a light on for you.
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and Environs Suggested...
EAST DOUNBY Armor: SCALEMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
The Aiken )
To The
Drum (Pub) Old City
To World Map
(
Shop
The Tup
(Pub) To East
Dounby
)
Kirk
WEST DOUNBY
WEAPONS
Silver Dirk 2500 SP
Quicksilver Rapier 3500 SP
Granite Flail 3500 SP
Lochaber Axe 4000 SP
Elderwood Bow 2000 SP
Blackthorn Bow 3000 SP
ARMOR
Chainmail 2600 SP
Scalemail 4200 SP
Targ Shield 2500 SP Early concept art of our hero, the Bard.
Kite Shield 4500 SP Now you have a template to follow for
your next big Halloween party. Too bad
you can’t smell an illustration’s breath.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
out the Explorer and seek out the hidden rooms..! Thus
D The Hoppin’ Part of Town ends your business (for the time being) in Dounby Town.
If you’d like to
Now about this underground Old City… Talk to the Metal move on to The
Mouth (there’s one attached to the wall near either Greenlands, go
entrance to this place – whether you try to come in from right ahead – but
East or West) to get some cryptic, roundabout, and there’s also
altogether puzzling information. Shortly afterward, you’ll Finstown crying
be attacked by Cu Sith. When you enter the area where a out for you to
kind of yuletide glitter hangs in the air, your summons will collect your
dissipate. This is an “anti-magic zone,” and as the game reward, if you
progresses, you’re going to come across a few more of recall the infor- CU SITH
these – just when you want to see them least. mation you got HP: 100 XP: 50
back in Kirkwall.
ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 0
The first chest in The Old City (assuming you’re entering To get back to the
from the West Dounby entrance) holds an Upgraded eastern portion of
Crone Tune. Soon after obtaining this, you’ll encounter the continent, ZOMBIE (ENTRAILS)
your first taste of Zombies – the Entrail Grabbing type, to travel through
HP: 100 XP: 100
be exact. Their stomachs will burst open and their intes- East Dounby, and
tines unfurl like gastroflails with the Bard as target. on to the World ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
They’re really pretty weak, now that you’re all geared up, Map.
and only derive their real strength from
traveling in packs. Go to the south and
find the chest that holds an entirely new
Tune – the Brute. This fat chum hurls *
boulders. He’s useful, but he’s not excep- To West
tional – I suggest staying with the old A Dounby
Mercenary and Knight standbys for the
time being. Make it to the extreme
southwest and you’ll find a new
instrument, the Silver Harp. Then bring
Silver Harp
Ceremonial Sword (200 SP)
C Amethyst (80 SP) C
Adderstone x 1 Hidden
Jeweled Sword (200 SP) B Room E
D Adderstone x 3
approx. 500 Silver Pieces
E Black Pearl (175 SP)
Adderstone x 2 THE OLD CITY
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and Environs Suggested...
EAST DOUNBY Armor: SCALEMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, KNIGHT
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Go to Finstown and find out about your reward. Find and talk to Silkbeard.
)
a chance to get in anything less deft than
your regular dual-wield set. When you
finally make your way to the north, just To
near the Save Point stands a large Viking of World Map
a man. He will tell you to go find Silkbeard
in the building in town that “still has most
of its windows intact.” Sounds promising.
SNIPER
HP: 60 XP: 100
ATK: 6d5+40 AC: 1d5
+ To World Map
FINN’S FOREST
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CHAPTER 9: FINSTOWN Segment: Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 19
and Environs Suggested...
FINN’S FOREST Armor: SCALEMAIL Summon: HEROINE, CRONE
VIKING (SWORD)
HP: 175 XP: 300
ATK: 5d5+10 AC: 2d5
VIKING (AXE)
HP: 175 XP: 300
ATK: 2d5+20 AC: 1d5
VIKING (HAMMER)
VIKING (2-HANDED)
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
XP. Be snarky and you’ll get kicked in the nuts and get
C The Silkbeard Situation 451 XP (oh la la!). Kill off all the Vikings, then head north
to Silkbeard’s – you’ll find the place deserted. Open the
Enter Silkbeard’s headquarters in the northeast section of treasure chests he tried so hard to keep you away from.
town. Inside, you’ll find a fully functioning weapons Big wealth inside, but bigger tune’age – two Tunes: the
shop, which includes some Rogue and the Gouger.
wonderful new pieces of
armor. Of course, as you’re heading to leave and as you
approach the exit, there you’ll find Silkbeard and
Silkbeard will praise you for company. Summon the Knight and the Mercenary, bring
having unloosed the Dragon out the Enchantress, and go to town. You can pull back
on the town. He says you to the surrounding land where the coast is clear if things
can take anything you want, get too hot and heavy, so you can heal with some
but you can’t touch his breathing space. Just keep hacking away and eventually
He never ate his bread-crust.
treasure. Well, then what Silkbeard will drop. Go visit the Village Elder. You can be
are you here for? Nor, once snarky or nice, but either response just gets you the
you get to the Armory, will gratitude of nothing. After you leave for the World Map,
you be greeted with open should you choose to re-enter Finn’s Forest again, it will
arms – you’ll be attacked by be filled with angry Vikings.
the Viking guards as soon
as you try to get inside. Kill
them all off – they’re no
pushovers, so take out as
many decoys, I mean,
summons as you can in the Sharp-dressed Norse.
interim to help deflect the
blows. After you take them
all out, go up to the door
and the fellows on the other
side will ask your identity –
you can be snarky or nice,
and either way you’re
getting a fight, but only by
nice do you get treated to a
little exchange between the Only if you’re nice.
men. Kill them off, then pop the treasure chests.
Perhaps the best treasure contained in here, besides the
big-time wealth, is the Broonie’s Cloak Token, which gives
the wearer a +10% health regen rate. When you step
back outside, you’ll get attacked by Vikings – this is the
new law of the land. The Viking Hammerwielders are
especially to be guarded against, as they will stun the
dickens out of you with their blows.
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and Environs Suggested...
TOWN OF FINSTOWN Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: KNIGHT, MERCENARY, ENCHANTRESS
Trowle’s
Pub F G H
Silkbeard Viking Pants (10 SP)
Token: Broonie’s Cloak
A Viking Axe (20 SP)
Diary (8 SP)
(
To Finn’s B
Granite Flail
Amethyst (80 SP)
Viking Sword (20 SP)
Forest Pearl (80 SP)
Viking Axe (20 SP)
Diamond (300 SP)
C Jeweled Bracelet (60 SP)
Scathach’s Mail
300 Silver Pieces
Ceremonial Sword (200 SP)
D Copper Goblet (4 SP)
Adderstone x 1
200 Silver Pieces
Adderstone x 1
E B A E Black Pearl (175 SP)
Amethyst (80 SP)
D C Finstown Prison
Amethyst (80 SP)
Jeweled Bracelet (60 SP)
Armory Camp F Adderstone x 1
Tune: Rogue
475 Silver Pieces
TOWN OF FINSTOWN Adderstone x 1
G Pearl (80 SP)
Houton Land Deed (60 SP)
Tune: Gouger (Health Stealer)
Jeweled Sword (200 SP)
H Ruby (100 SP)
Adderstone x 1
WEAPONS
Silver Dirk 2500 SP
Quicksilver Broadsword 3500 SP
Granite Flail 3500 SP
Lochaber Axe 4000 SP
Let your summons help out. Elderwood Bow 2000 SP
Blackthorn Bow 3000 SP
Blackthorn Great Bow 4500 SP BOSS
ARMOR SILKBEARD
Scalemail 4200 SP HP: 700 XP: 750
White Bronze 5500 SP ATK: 10d5+5 AC: 3d5
Chainmail
Kite Shield 4500 SP Silkbeard has the same skills
as the regular Viking, it just
Silkbeard slaughter!
White Bronze 5000 SP takes a longer time to hack
Targ Shield him down to his knees.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Defeat the Nuckelavee. Travel to Stromness to Find a way to get to the Island Tower. Bring
MacRath to Dounby – maybe Dugan knows what the hell he’s saying. Go to the ruins of MacRath’s
castle and get the Shadow Axe from the dungeon.
To North
Plain The Pet To
World Map
DRUID (STAFF)
HP: 60 XP: 75
A
ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 1d5
DRUID (DARK)
HP: 200 XP: 200
ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 1d5
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Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
THE GREENLANDS SOUTH & NORTH PLAINS Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
C
REDCAP
HP: 125 XP: 250
ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 0
ZOMBIE (ENTRAILS)
The Nuckelavee
HP: 100 XP: 100
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
ZOMBIE (HEAD)
Wretched new enemies here: the Redcaps. These manic In the middle of the Northern Plain, you’ll find a man very
demonfolk gambol about like over-eager hairless cats – upset – and get 1050 XP for meeting him. This guy
but you’ll find their predilection for tearing apart nearby proves to be your man – but before anything further of
Druids quite amusing. Anything with two legs is a target importance can occur, you must take on the Nuckelavee...
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Oh, you knew this moment was coming for quite some examine these
time, I reckon. The best stones, you’ll find
strategy for The Nuckelavee some significance
is to circle around him, in their names.)
hack from the side or rear – Now it’s back to
and don’t rely too much on Dounby with your
your summons, as the little new friend in tow. BOSS
“skull pal” Spirit that the (Indeed, from this
THE NUCKELAVEE
Nucklavee has whirling point on in the
around the place will draw game, if you ever HP: 500 XP: 750
mana from our fellow Bard. Nuckelavee: no Lollipopkid. decide to return ATK: 7d10+50 AC: 1d5+2
It might be worth your while here, as with so many other to Houton, you’ll
boss battles, to invoke the Level 3 invincibility of the find it’s overrun Small Spirits will whizz about
Caleigh Artifact. by Zombiefolk, the vicinity of the Nuckelavee,
absolutely sapping valuable mana away
After taking out the Nuckelavee, examine the discon- pillaged, with from the Bard.
certing ring of tombstones here – after which point, the every shop made
Zombies will attack. (When you get a proper moment to inaccessible.
DRUID (STAFF)
HP: 60 XP: 75
ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 1d5 Is this freak your man?
DRUID (SCYTHE)
HP: 110 XP: 175
ATK: 5d5+10 AC: 1d5
DRUID (SICKLES)
HP: 85/150 XP: 90/250
ATK: VARIES AC: VARIES Dugan, is this freak my man?
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Chapter 10: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
THE GREENLANDS MACRATH’S DUNGEON Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Apology
Man
To North
Plain
1: LORD BAUDER’S DUNGEON
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
A lotta claptrap.
To 9
To 2
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Chapter 10: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
THE GREENLANDS MACRATH’S DUNGEON Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, KNIGHT
To 10 To 8
D To 7
To 6
Inside Room 5, Lord Apono’s Lecture Hall,
you’ll encounter some Zombies, but also
some Shades, which are sort of “non-enemy
combatants,” for the most part undefeatable
by normal weapons but who will disappear as
soon as your Light Fairy touches one of them.
They’re not really classifiable as “attackers,”
but they still serve to impede your progress
slightly.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
A B
Hidden Hidden
Room To 12 Room
By the way: If you’re in a spot in the
dungeon where no anti-magic zones
exist, it’s probably worth bringing out
To 5 To 10 the Light Fairy for the simple sake of
brightening things up slightly even if
the room isn’t completely pitch-black,
as it can get pretty dark in this place.
To 7 To 8
To 6
Tune: Upgraded Heroine
A Adderstone x 1
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Chapter 10: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
THE GREENLANDS MACRATH’S DUNGEON Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, KNIGHT
To 5
To 4
To 3
To 2
Room 9, Lord Pershing’s Dance Hall Macabre
finds a legion of Zombies engaged in dance
class. School’s out, folks. But an epic battle
against the undead has begun. Throw your
grimoires out the window – it’s aggression
time.
E
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
To 9 B To 4
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Chapter 10: Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
THE GREENLANDS MACRATH’S DUNGEON Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: CRONE, MERCENARY, KNIGHT
BOSS
THE ZOMBIE
HP: 600 XP: 800
ATK: 6d5+5 AC: 2d5+5
Butchery with Lugh’s Artifact. The very powerful Behemoth Tune. The wandering Priest.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Meet up with Hatcher. Make your way to the Shop. Lead Hatcher to the gate.
Pass through The Farm to get to The Firbolg Mines.
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CHAPTER 11: STROMNESS Segment: Weapon: CLAIDHEAMH SOLUIS Level: 20
and Environs Suggested...
TOWN OF STROMNESS Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
(
To World
Map
A B
666 Silver Pieces
Shop A Adderstone x 1
Hatcher
666 Silver Pieces
Snarky
Trow
B Adderstone x 3
D
+To The Farm
TOWN OF STROMNESS
WEAPONS
Elemental Tune, along with a nice reward in
Vipersteel Dirk 7000 SP
the amount of 880 XP.
Ravensteel Broadsword 8000 SP
Talk to Hatcher, and you’ll receive 1650 XP, Onyx Flail 8000 SP
and he’ll lead you to the Firbolg Mines. Of Frecraid 9000 SP
course, it’s a dangerous place, this Stromness Blackthorn Great Bow 4500 SP
– and nothing ever goes correctly right off the
Bow of Bile Dathi 6500 SP
bat anyway. Stick close to him, and he’ll take
you to the Shop on the east so you can finally Elemental’y, my boy. ARMOR
get inside. The trick is to defend him from the
encroaching Draugr. If he dies along the way, White Bronze 5500 SP
the Firbolg Mines will be unlocked on the Chainmail
World Map, but you won’t get in to the shop. White Bronze 8500 SP
He’s a bit of a weakling, but as long as you Scalemail
have your summons near the old geezer, you
stand a good chance of saving him – he has
White Bronze 5000 SP
his own bow for self-defense as well. If you Targ Shield
already happened to find the Armor of Llyr, White Bronze 7000 SP
there’s no need to buy the White Bronze Scale Kite Shield
Mail, as they have the same statistics. The
Bow of Bile Dathi can fire exploding arrows. If ...then they’ll come after you.
INSTRUMENTS
you buy the Ancient Flute, you’ll also get the Ancient Flute 4000 SP
Upgraded Brute tune as a bonus.
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B Animal Nitrate
Now stick close to Hatcher.
There’s a positively stomach-
turning battle coming up at the
end of this section, and if he
manages to survive this approx. 600 SP
confrontation, the Ddraig Goch A Adderstone x 3
Bow will be yours. The battle is
with the pulsating, gross Haggis approx. 300 Silver Pieces BOSS
Monster. He’ll let an explosion of B Token: Four Leaf Clover HAGGIS MONSTER
haggis fly through the air, raining Adderstone x 1 HP: 650 XP: 800
down on your party. I suggest
having out at least two C 250 Silver Pieces ATK: 5d5+10 AC: 0
summons, one melee and one
approx. 450 Silver Pieces The Haggis Monster will
ranged, and making use of the unloose an explosion of blood-
Token: Golden Thistle
Level 3 Caleigh Artifact invulnera- D Ring ripe haggis upon all in the
bility power as quickly as you Adderstone x 1 vicinity.
can. Approach the main portion
To Stromness *
ZOMBIE COW B
HP: 175 XP: 300
A
ATK: 15d5+15 AC: 6d5
ZOMBIE ROOSTER
C D
HP: 50 XP: 100 To The
ATK: 5d5 AC: 0 Firbolg Mines
)
ZOMBIE SHEEP Haggis
Monster
HP: 150 XP: 200
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d5
THE FARM
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CHAPTER 11: STROMNESS Segment: Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
and Environs Suggested...
THE FARM Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: HEROINE, KNIGHT
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
Meet up with Hatcher. Make your way to the Shop. Lead Hatcher to the gate.
Pass through The Farm to get to The Firbolg Mines.
Culainn, you’ll get 1000 Silver Pieces right off the bat,
A Digging for Air then the 3300 XP. You have the chance to be snarky or
nice again when Culainn says he has something that
You’ll meet some nice Firbolg Miners around here, but might interest you more than
only when you encounter Culainn will you find out what’s silver – be snarky twice and
going down – some miners have gotten trapped behind a you won’t get the sword.
collapsed wall, and they’re doing the best to dig them out. But who would pass up the
But could do with some reinforcements. If you’re nice, offer of a speaking sword?
you’re charged with helping to gather up some of the You’ll get 2000 Silver Pieces
miners you see around the instead.
place and lead them back to
the rescue squad. You have If you happened to keep A match made in heaven.
a limited amount of time Dolyn alive (he was the
until the lost team runs out Firbolg trapped way back in
of air – you’ll be able to see The Frozen Tombs), you’ll
on the top of the screen the also encounter this chap
air remaining (a timer here. Out of gratitude for
counting down) versus the your freeing the trapped
Get searching for miners!
percentage of the digging- miners, he’ll give the Bard a
out complete. Get very valuable Token indeed –
moving! And the White Book of
watch out for Rhydderch. This Token will The other White Book.
Finfolk inside! add a +50 bonus onto your
One shot from maximum number of mana points. With benefits like that,
them will kill a it’s hard to believe Rhydderch’s book isn’t a best-seller
following Firbolg. throughout the land – although it’s probably only a
Get them all free, “limited edition of 1.”
and you’ll get 2200
XP. You’ll also get FINFOLK Head down to the southeast
the incredible Ego where the save point is, and
HP: 200 XP: 350
Sword, which has you’ll find a raft docked at
a magnificent ATK: 7d5+10 AC: 1d5 the shore. Hop onto the
range, and an float.
additional 2200
Silver Pieces.
Get on the raft.
If you’re snarky to
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CHAPTER 12: THE Segment: Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
FIRBOLG MINES Suggested...
THE FIRBOLG MINES Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
To The Farm *
Rescue
C Team Miner
Miner
B
Miner
Miner
1000 Silver Pieces
A Coal (1 SP) x 3
Diamond (300 SP)
Miner B Ruby (100 SP)
D Amethyst (80 SP)
)
Miner Adderstone x 1
To The 2000 Silver Pieces
Underground C Adderstone x 2
Miner River
250 Silver Pieces
A Ruby (100 SP)
D Diamond (300 SP)
THE FIRBOLG MINES Adderstone x 1
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To
)
Finfolk
Caverns
FINFOLK
HP: 200 XP: 350
ATK: 7d5+10 AC: 1d5 B
FINFOLK LORD (
To Firbolg
HP: 350 XP: 400 Mines
ATK: 10d5+20 AC: 2d5+2
ROCK SWINE
HP: 100 XP: 200
ATK: 5d5+30 AC: 1d5
EARTH GOLEM
HP: 100 XP: 200 A
ATK: 6d5+20 AC: 4d5
THE UNDERGROUND RIVER
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CHAPTER 12: THE Segment: Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
FIRBOLG MINES Suggested...
THE FINFOLK CAVERNS Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Olav
FINFOLK Bannock
HP: 200 XP: 350
A
ATK: 7d5+10 AC: 1d5
(
To The
FINFOLK LORD Underground
River
HP: 350 XP: 400
ATK: 10d5+20 AC: 2d5+2
Energy Gate
C
EARTH GOLEM
HP: 100 XP: 200
D )ToLava
Obligatory
Level
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CHAPTER 12: THE Segment: Weapon: DDRAIG GOCH Level: 20
FIRBOLG MINES Suggested...
THE NARROW SEA Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY, KNIGHT
will be held in place by four of the smaller Tentacle creatures that emerge from
the snotgreen sea-tide. They won’t attack you or cause any real harm –
they’re really only interested in
flexing.
)
A B C
To World
Map
(
To The
Finfolk
Caverns
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Redcaps and Druids abound on the outer grounds of the If it wasn’t clear yet by this point in the game, you’re
Island Tower. There are no real surprises here, and all reaching the end of your quest. I’ll take a moment here
you really need to do is make your way up the grounds, to tell you that while the challenge ahead is still rather
toward the entrance to the tower, hitting the treasure significant, you will have seen, with this tower, the full
chests along the way. Go in and out of the Grove spectrum of enemies. Just not the full array of bosses...
DRUID (SICKLES)
HP: 85/150 XP: 90/250
A ATK: VARIES AC: VARIES
DRUID (DARK)
HP: 200 XP: 200
ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 1d5
REDCAP
To World
Map
HP: 125 XP: 250
ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 0
THE ISLAND TOWER GROVE
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CHAPTER 13: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
ISLAND TOWER ISLAND TOWER GROVE Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
Jeweled Sword
(200 SP)
B Adderstone x 1
History of Dounby
(90 SP)
C Adderstone x 2
Black Pearl (175 SP)
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CHAPTER 13: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
ISLAND TOWER LEVEL 1 Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
A
From
Island
Tower
Grove
B
To Level 2
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
E
D
C B F
To Level 3
From
Level 1
A
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CHAPTER 13: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
ISLAND TOWER LEVEL 3 Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
B
From
Level 2
A
C
To
Mannanan’s
Chamber
D
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ROCK SWINE
HP: 100 XP: 200
ATK: 5d5+30 AC: 1d5
EARTH GOLEM
HP: 100 XP: 200
ATK: 6d5+20 AC: 4d5
PHANTOM DRAUGR
HP: 125 XP: 200
ATK: 8d5+10 AC: ??
FIRE BOAR
HP: 125 XP: 100
ATK: 8d5+50 AC: 2d5+1
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CHAPTER 13: THE Segment: Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 20
MANNANAN’S CHAMBER Suggested...
ISLAND TOWER Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
advantage of these
E Mannanan’s Chamber when the tornado
cuts too close, so
Here you are, the big face- you can flee across
off with the last of the three to the opposite
Tower bosses. A few things side. The other big
about this deadly, deadly attack by
guy. For one, he will shoot Mannanan is the BOSS
electrical beams your way atomic explosions
that, if you are standing he’ll unloose every-
MANNANAN
nearby and are struck, will where (now you HP: 1000 XP: 1000
constantly decrease your Electrical storm a-brewin’. know why Level 3 ATK: 6d5+30 AC: 4d5
damage until the field finally of this place looks
dissipates from your body like such a disaster Avoid the tornado wrath, then
in about two and a half area). When dodge the atomic bomb wrath.
seconds. Additionally, Mannanan is in You might suffer massive
Mannanan will transform explosive form, damage in this battle.
into a tornado and follow just run around
you around, whipping up and dodge the
mayhem for you and your falling fire – not much more can be said other than: “Pay
summons, inflicting a great attention! And avoid! (And/or use your Caleigh Arifact!)”
deal of damage as aresult. And HP-loss accruin’. Needless to say, he can only be damaged in physical
After he circles the central form. Stay as far away as you can from the tornado, as
dais several times, he will his electrical blasts have
finally resolve to his quite a range.
normal physical form, at
which point you Defeat Mannanan and
should draw out receive the Mannanan
your summons Artifact and 15
again (as by this Adderstones. As you’ll see,
point it’s highly you can let
likely they’ve out a Hallucinogenic!!!! Yet real.
been crushed by hooray
the ‘nado) and for not having to descend the tower
have at him. like you did the last two times and take
See the four on a swarm of Druids. No, this time
steps up to the around, you’re off – on the back of... a
dais? Take flaming manta-ray.
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CHAPTER 14: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 22
DOUNBY TOWER THE DOUNBY TOWER Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
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B C
A D
Floors 7 and 12
Floors 1 - 6 and 8 - 11 All Chests: Adderstone x 1
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CHAPTER 14: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 22
DOUNBY TOWER THE DOUNBY TOWER Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
FLOOR
2 The Cu Sith Battle CU SITH
You faced these guys a lot later in the game than around
the time you were also fighting Kunaltrow, but they’ll HP: 100 XP: 50
make up your second group of opponents in the Tower ATK: 3d5+10 AC: 0
regardless of chronology. Hack these marrow-dripping
mutts up and watch out for their dreaded Dread Howl The Bard pulls a boner.
attack – the one that looks like they’re burping up skunk
meat.
FLOOR
3 The Scarecrow Battle SCARECROW
Lots of Scarecrows here – take a position on the
perimeter, because if you get hemmed in by these HP: 90 XP: 100
buggers you might never get out. From the sidelines, ATK: 3d5+15 AC: 0
launch one fire-arrow after another and light them up.
They’ll be a snap. Hay-fever sufferers, beware.
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FLOOR
6 The Redcap Battle REDCAP
With your fiercest melee summons surrounding you, use
the devastating Mannanan Artifact to summon the big HP: 125 XP: 250
man himself and draw the Redcaps all together into one ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 0
bunch with the tornado, then wipe them out with your
dual-wield fury. This is a pretty gruesome fight. Redcaps fall upon your head.
HP: 100 XP: 100 HP: 100 XP: 100 HP: 100 XP: 100
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5 ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5 ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
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CHAPTER 14: THE Segment: Suggested...
Weapon: RAVENSTEEL BROADSWORD Level: 22
DOUNBY TOWER THE DOUNBY TOWER Armor: W. B. CHAINMAIL Summon: MERCENARY
11 The Earth & Fire Battle up to the twelfth floor and make
use of the well-deserved save
Yeah, I think the last room was still the most difficult. But point waiting for you there.
that doesn’t mean this room is any slouch either. Just as
you took on the elements of water during the last battle,
so will you now face the forces of fire. Keep slashing
through these guys, using everything at your disposal. A little bit of everything.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
BOSS
FIONNAOCH
HP: 1000 XP: N/A
ATK: 6d5+50 AC: 7d5
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Dounby is a small village on the Orkney Mainland. No menacing towers stand within its vicinity.
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The following is an all-in-one reference guide to the creatures and enemies who will attempt to break the
Bard’s steely resolve. You’ll also find Special Attacks, and Items Dropped (listed in order of probability).
TYPE: W O LV E S TYPE: W O LV E S
TYPE: K U N A LT R O W TYPE: K U N A LT R O W
KUNALTROW
(SWORD)
HP: 25 XP: 20 KUNALTROW
(SPEAR)
HP: 25 XP: 25
ATK: 1d5+2 AC: 0 ATK: 1d5+4 AC: 1d4
Items Dropped: Items Dropped:
Trow Sword, Trow Pants, Trow Spear
Snowglobe o’ Houton, Family
Pictures
TYPE: K U N A LT R O W TYPE: K U N A LT R O W
KUNALTROW
(ARCHER)
HP: 25 XP: 20 KUNALTROW
(2 SWORDS)
HP: 60 XP: 40
ATK: 2d5+2 AC: 0 ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d4
Items Dropped: Items Dropped:
Bow, Arrows None
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Trow are a wee faerie-folk who have dwelt for centuries throughout the Orkney Islands - FACT.
What are the names of two of the most historically notorious Trow? Truncherface and Bannafeet.
TYPE: K U N A LT R O W TYPE: K U N A LT R O W
KUNALTROW
(WITCH DOCTOR)
HP: 50 XP: 50 KUNALTROW
(CABER)
HP: 30 XP: 40
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d4 ATK: 4d5+10 AC: 1d4
Special: Heal spell, Hex spell Items Dropped:
Lifting Belt
Items Dropped:
Polished Bones, Brass Ring
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110 primagames.com
The Cu Sith are a strange breed of Scottish faerie-folk also known as the Black Angus.
Their name is pronounced “cugh shee,” and translates to English as “faerie dog.”
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112 primagames.com
In Scottish mythology, Redcap is a wicked spirit who gained his name by repeatedly
soaking his cap in human blood, as a crude means of dying the garment.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
114 primagames.com
Cathbad was the name of the resident seer-druid in the court of Emain Macha – see
page 133 for more details.
FNARF HP: 125 XP: 250 HERNE HP: 400 XP: 300
ATK: 5d5+20 AC: 2d5 ATK: 4d5+10 AC: 1d5+1
Special: Special:
In early encounters, he’ll teleport
around the screen, staying out of Capable of poisoning, summoning
harm’s way, but in the final battle, he’ll Plants, and engaging roots to snag
use his bow. his enemy for several seconds.
CHAPTER: 7 : T H E M O U N TA I N T O W E R CHAPTER: 7 : T H E M O U N TA I N T O W E R
CATHBAD HP: 250 XP: 100 LUGH HP: 450 XP: 750
ATK: 5d5+30 AC: 2d5+2 ATK: 4d5+20 AC: 2d5
Special: Special:
Attacks in the same manner as a Surrounds himself with a deadly
Staff Druid – melee assaults and shield of spinning axes in addition
energy-beam blasts. to hurling spears.
SILKBEARD HP: 700 XP: 750 THE PET HP: 500 XP: 750
ATK: 10d5+5 AC: 3d5 ATK: 5d10+40 AC: 1d5+3
Special: Special:
None – melee attacks only. The Pet will attack with a disori-
enting plummet from the sky.
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“DEATH IS GLORY”
116 primagames.com
Legend has it that the Nuckelavee was the most feared creature among all the faerie-folk in the
Orkney Islands’ ancient epoch – and, furthermore, that he was scared to death of rainwater.
CHAPTER: 13: THE ISLAND TOWER CHAPTER: 14: THE DOUNBY TOWER
MANNANAN HP: 1000 XP: 1000 MACKAY HP: 200 XP: 200
ATK: 6d5+30 AC: 4d5 ATK: 8d5+20 AC: 1d5
Special: Special:
Alternates between a whirlwind Follows the same pattern as Dark
and atomic explosion attack every Druids – energy-beam blast attack.
time he loses 100 HP.
CHAPTER: 14: THE DOUNBY TOWER CHAPTER: 14: THE DOUNBY TOWER
EVIL
CALEIGH
HP: 600 XP: N/A FIONNAOCH HP: 1000 XP: N/A
ATK: 6d5+50 AC: 1d5 ATK: 6d5+50 AC: 7d5
Special: Special:
Splits herself into mirage images, Casts a Slow spell on the Bard, has the
summons a flaming rain, and charms all ability to “grab” the Bard and pull him
male summons... except, erm, the Light close, and summons forth Druids and
Fairy. Plants.
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The following is an all-in-one reference guide to the Weapons, Armor, Instruments, Cash-In Items, Tokens,
Artifacts, and Summon Tunes of the game. You’ll find complete statistics, along with the respective cash
value of an item after you upgrade to something a bit (or a lot) more powerful.
weapons
[ swords ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Sword 10 SP Broadsword 60 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
1d5 none 3d5+2 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Caladbolg 100 SP Quicksilver Broadsword
350 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
3d5+4 none 4d5+2 Magic Aura: 100% 2d5
[ dirks ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Dirk 60 SP Silver Dirk 250 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
3d5+1 none 5d5+1 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Vipersteel Dirk 700 SP Basluath N/A
damage: special: damage: special:
Poison: 100% 4d5
6d5+2 Poison: 50% 3d5 7d5+4 Life Drain: 50%
118 primagames.com
“Claidheamh Soluis” is the Irish name for the legendary “Sword of Light.”
[ two-handed ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Claymore 80 SP Claidheamh Soluis 150 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
4d5+5 none 5d5+7 Electrical: 100% 1d5
[ flails ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Flail 70 SP Crannderg 150 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
Unblockable: 100%
4d5+4 Unblockable: 100% 5d5+6 Stunning Blow: 25%
[ bows ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Longbow 25 SP Great Bow 50 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
4d6+5 none 5d6+6 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Glaisne 100 SP Elderwood Bow 200 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
6d6+7 Fire Arrows: 100% 2d5 7d6+8 Fire Arrows: 100% 3d5
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
[ bows (continued) ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Blackthorn Bow 300 SP Blackthorn Great Bow
450 SP
damage: special: damage: special:
8d6+9 Fire Arrows: 100% 4d5 9d6+10 Fire Arrows: 100% 5d5
[ musical weapons ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Shadow Axe 250 SP Ego Sword N/A
damage: special: damage: special:
Fear Strike: 75%
6d5+8 Mana: 400 Summoning Limit: 3 8d5+12 Mana: 400 Summoning Limit: 3
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Scathach, or “Shadowy One,” is the Irish goddess of war, whereas Llyr is the Welsh god of
the sea.
armor
[ body armor ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Padded Armor 20 SP Leather Armor 40 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
1d1 none 1d2 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Studded Leather Armor 80 SP Oak Leaf Armor 100 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
1d2+1 none 2d2 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Chainmail 260 SP Scalemail 420 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
2d2+1 none 3d2 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Scathach’s Mail 500 SP White Bronze Chainmail 550 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
3d2+1 none 4d2 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Armor of Llyr 650 SP White Bronze Scalemail N/A
protection: special: protection: special:
4d2+1 none 4d2+1 none
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
[ shields ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Buckler 50 SP Targ Shield 250 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
1d2 none 1d2+1 none
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Kite Shield 450 SP Dubgilla 550 SP
protection: special: protection: special:
2d2 none 2d2+1 Healing Shield: 10%
instruments
[ instruments ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Lute 25 SP Harp 75 SP
mana: summons: regen: mana: summons: regen:
100 1 100% 200 2 100%
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Ornate Lute 150 SP Jeweled Flute 250 SP
mana: summons: regen: mana: summons: regen:
300 2 100% 300 3 100%
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Silver Harp 300 SP Finn’s Lute 500 SP
mana: summons: regen: mana: summons: regen:
400 3 100% 500 3 125%
122 primagames.com
Ossian, or “Oisin,” figures prominently in Irish myth as a blind bard of extraordinary artistic capability and bravery. He’s
been immortalized as the central figure in William Butler Yeats’s early epic poem, “The Wanderings of Oisin.”
[ instruments (continued) ]
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Ancient Flute 400 SP Harp of Ages 500 SP
mana: summons: regen: mana: summons: regen:
500 4 125% 600 4 150%
name: cash value: name: cash value:
Gnimh’s Flute 600 SP Ossian’s Lute 700 SP
mana: summons: regen: mana: summons: regen:
700 4 150% 800 4 150%
tokens
Badger Hide Gloves Belt of the Oak Firbolg Armbands Findruine Charm Fae Locket
+1 +2 +3 +1 +2
Phial of Medb Rabbit’s Foot Silver Horseshoe Four Leaf Clover Badge of the Wind
+3 +1 +2 +3 +1
Boots of Quickening Lightning Stone Silver Torc Gold Coronet Mantel of Ossian
+2 +1 +1 +2 +3
Eagle Charm Ring of Tara Cormac’s Chalice Golden Thistle Ring White Book of Rhydderch
White Book of Hergest Golden Spyglass Amulet of Llyr Broonie’s Cloak Falstone
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artifacts
artifact: effects: artifact: effects:
Caleigh I: Heals Bard and summons. Herne I: Summons roots to bind all
II: Blesses Bard and summons. enemies.
category: III: Bestows Bard and summons category: II: Large area-spray of poison.
with a temporary invulnerability to III: Summons vines to entangle and
Healing damage. Debilitation constrict on-screen enemies.
cash-in items
ITEM VALUE ITEM VALUE
Almanac 15 SP Lifting Belt 8 SP
Amethyst 80 SP Lobster Bib 12 SP
Ancient Bracelet 300 SP Mistletoe 8 SP
Arrows 4 SP Money Bag (Buried) 4 SP
Bottle of Chianti 60 SP Mutton 12 SP
Black Pearl 175 SP Nuckle Heart 250 SP
Boar Pelt 8 SP Nugget 1 SP
Boar Tusk 2 SP Pearl 80 SP
Book of the Dun Cow 200 SP Picnic Basket 5 SP
Bow 30 SP Picture of Lugh 10 SP
Brain 8 SP Polished Bones 4 SP
Brass Ring 4 SP Red-Hooded Cloak 10 SP
Ceremonial Sword 200 SP Roasted Chicken 8 SP
Coal 1 SP Rotting Pants 4 SP
Copper Goblet 4 SP Ruby 100 SP
Cu Sith Pelt 8 SP Seashells 4 SP
Diamond 300 SP Seed Pod 3 SP
Diary 8 SP Self-Help Book 10 SP
Diploma 60 SP Sheepskin 8 SP
Drinking Horn 8 SP Silver Candlestick 10 SP
Druidic Pants 15 SP Skin Salve 10 SP
Emerald 200 SP Sniper Pants 8 SP
Empty Bottle 4 SP Snowglobe O’ Houton 15 SP
Eyeball 4 SP Steak 10 SP
Family Picture 8 SP Stonehenge Keepsake 12 SP
Fancy Pants 120 SP Swim Trunks 8 SP
Fertilizer 8 SP Trow Pants 8 SP
Frozen Horn 17 SP Two-Handed Axe 10 SP
Frozen Meat 8 SP Two-Handed Hammer 10 SP
Frozen Viking Pants 16 SP Throwing Axe 10 SP
Gears 16 SP Throwing Hammer 10 SP
Golden Chalice 200 SP Trow Spear 8 SP
Grouse 8 SP Trow Sword 8 SP
Haggis 20 SP Two-Handed Sword 30 SP
Haunch of Meat 10 SP Viking Axe 20 SP
History of Dounby 90 SP Viking Pants 10 SP
Houton Land Deed 60 SP Viking Sword 20 SP
Jeweled Bracelet 60 SP Wanted Poster 10 SP
Jeweled Sword 200 SP Wolf Pelt 4 SP
124 primagames.com
In Irish mythology, Mannanan is the god of the sea – indeed, the name by which he is
most commonly invoked, Mannanan mac Lir, translates to “Mannanan, son of the sea.”
tunes
These are the sixteen summons of the game, with “upgraded” versions noted as well.
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
tunes
(continued)
126 primagames.com
A great number of Orkney knights figure in Sir Thomas Malory’s sprawling proto-novel,
‘La Morte d’Arthur’ (Old French for “The Death of Arthur”).
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Five Extra Dungeons exist in the game which can only be accessed by purchasing treasure maps for sale from the Trow on the World Map,
and Seamus in the Town of Houton. In these Extra Dungeons you’ll find Tokens to complete your collection... as much as possible, that
is. The highest number of Tokens you can carry is twenty-four out of the twenty-five total in the game... unless you cheat. This section
will teach you how to do that, along with helping you get through these Extra Dungeons the fair-and-square way.
This dungeon appeared on the World Map as a result of hard to avoid, but I would suggest either waiting an
your purchasing the most expensive map (and item) in interval and running through, or pulling out your shield
the game, and indeed, it’s the longest of the extra and blocking one set of bursts (walk into the line of fire
dungeons. But there are and prepare the shield only during an interval in the traps
some real prizes to find in firing) and then continuing around them – or, another
here, if you can cope with option, summon your Bodyguard. Right past these dual
the abundance of traps arrow shooters everything turns anti-magic again. Hang
everywhere.. west when a corridor opens up, and you’ll come into
another anti-magic zone, -- watch out for the two Crusher
The western wing contains a Traps, and then
room that doesn’t appear on the Zombies near
the automap, but which The dark hidden room. the chest.
exists nonetheless – this will
be a common feature to the Extra Dungeons that lie In the final, most
ahead of you. (Note the location of Treasure Chest A on northern room,
the map). The chest in this secret room (opened as you’ll still have to
always by summoning the contend with anti-
Explorer) holds Gnimh’s magic dust in the ZOMBIE (ENTRAILS)
Flute, alongside some air, which is a real
monetary goodies. set-back, as there HP: 100 XP: 100
are a lot of ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
When you enter the eastern Zombies here that
wing, you’ll walk right into some summons ZOMBIE (HEAD)
an anti-magic zone where would make a tad
your summons will easier to deal HP: 100 XP: 100
automatically dissipate. The Golden Spyglass. with. In the chest ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
Walking through the door of the easternmost room and you’ll get the
saunter around the spikes, which lie just past the Golden Spyglass ZOMBIE (GUTS)
threshold. Slice up the Zombies inside and take the loot – Token.
despite the size of this place there’s only one chest. HP: 100 XP: 100
ATK: 4d5+5 AC: 1d5
Progressing north up the main corridor, you’ll find two
Arrow Traps blasting away in a criss-cross pattern – this is
128 primagames.com
“Dun Ailinne” is a hill-fort located, in our own world, in Ireland’s County Kildare.
A
Hidden
Room
B C
To World Map
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
BOAR
HP: 30 XP: 20
D ATK: 3d5+8 AC: 1d2+1
Hidden
Room BOAR-RIDER
C HP: 40 XP: 20
ATK: 4d5+15 AC: 2d5+1
A
700 Silver Pieces
To World Map D
Token: Amulet of Llyr
Ruby (100 SP)
Pearl (80 SP)
CAIRN OF ARDAGH Emerald (200 SP)
130 primagames.com
Ardagh is a small village in County Longford, Ireland that hosts the ruins of the ancient St. Mel’s Cathedral,
while Carrowmore in County Sligo hosts a massive cemetery of some of Ireland’s oldest megalithic tombs.
The Draugr are fearsome here, and they’ll hurl their weapons like there’s no
tomorrow. In the second and third of the three burial chambers to the
north, you’ll find some Arrow Traps – so keep in mind that with nothing to
win, opening those doors is like opening a can of snakes. It’s the first door
you want to pop. There’s a plethora of hidden rooms here, stuffed with
treasure, like the Dubgilla, and Token: Philal of Medb (+3 to Vitality).
DRAUGR (SWORD)
HP: 80 XP: 50
approx. 800 Silver Pieces ATK: 3d5+20 AC: 1d5+1
Self-Help Book (10 SP)
A Pearl (80 SP)
Golden Chalice (200 SP)
DRAUGR (AXE)
approx. 500 Silver Pieces HP: 80 XP: 60
Amethyst (80 SP)
B Adderstone x 1
Ceremonial Sword (200 SP)
ATK: 2d5+25 AC: 1d3
approx. 1400 Silver Pieces DRAUGR (HAMMER)
Ruby (100 SP) A lot of Draugr...
C Adderstone x 1
Diamond (300 SP) HP: 80 XP: 60
ATK: 2d5+15 AC: 1d3
DRAUGR (2-HAND SWORD)
C HP: 80 XP: 75
ATK: 4d5+30 AC: 1d5
PHANTOM DRAUGR
B HP: 125/150 XP: 200/300
ATK: VARIES AC: 0
D
Hidden
F Room Hidden
Room approx. 300 Silver Pieces
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
ZOMBIE (GUTS)
ZOMBIE COW
HP: 175 XP: 300
ATK: 15d5+15 AC: 6d5
ZOMBIE ROOSTER
HP: 50 XP: 100
ATK: 5d5 AC: 0
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Emain Macha is the site of the ancient capital of Ulster in Ireland. Its name means “Macha’s Twins,” and is derived from an old myth
involving Ulster’s male populace being cursed to experience, at the moment of their greatest peril, the labor pains associated with the
bearing of twins by a harried mother-to-be. Macha, quick with child and forced to outrace a cart to free an idiot spouse, got her revenge.
B
D
A
To World Map
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
ZOMBIE SHEEP
HP: 150 XP: 200
ATK: 2d5+5 AC: 1d5
D B
C
To World Map D
approx. 1000 Silver Pieces
Adderstone x 3
Token: Cormac’s Chalice
RUINS OF TARA
134 primagames.com
Tara, located in County Meath, Ireland, was the power center of the island-nation until
Strongbow’s invasion in 1169.
SPECIAL SECRETS
[ the extras menu ]
You know how when you fire up your game, in-game cash to pop them up for your viewing...
and you go into the opening menu, you’re without cheating, that is. But we’ll get to that
confronted with an option for an “Extras Menu”? later. (If you don’t mind either way, then note
Have you ever that the extreme
wondered how you numbers you’re about
unlock these extra to get hit with are pretty
pieces of artwork, much arbitrary digits.)
musical pieces, and The uncontrollable urge
movies, and to unlock each gallery
furthermore, what they might subside after you
consist of? Look no The complete Art Gallery. learn that the movies The complete Movie Gallery.
further than here, dear consist of the opening
reader – only you and titles and the game’s endings.
your MRI technician
know whether the Entries in the Extras Menu are unlocked
draw of these extras is whenever your memory card contains a saved
powerful enough to game in which donations have been made to a
compel you to spend Kirk that meet or exceed the amounts that
the massive amounts follow. (You see, the donations did have a
of time saving up the The complete Song Gallery. purpose beyond virtual good-will after all.)
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PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!
SPOILER!!!!!!!!!!
If you fight Evil Caleigh, you get this If you fight Fionnaoch, you get this If you choose to... do nothing at all,
ending. Back to old habits again. ending. The perfect couple. you get this ending. Get down.
136 primagames.com
Although the most docile of Scottish faerie-folk, Brownies are much more likely than any
Trow to gut the human who cheats them out of money or personal belongings.
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It wasn’t long after the sixth grade let out that I course, by the matrices of character stats and
found myself plunked down daily in the corner of real-time text updates describing the action.*
a friend’s den, staring at the CRT of an “IBM-
compatible” computer. Onscreen, without fail: I don’t think the computer even had a sound
The Bard’s Tale. I recall with great fondness the card. (Or, if the thing did have one, its 12-year-
fabulous misadventures of we three pre-adoles- old owner, like so many of the era’s millions of
cents at large in sprawling Skara Brae – well, personal computer users – still “hobbyists” by
before I go further I’ll pause to massage the 1989? – couldn’t get it to configure with his
memory a little bit more, and here surprise system.) And the graphics, although admittedly
myself to discover that “sprawling” Skara Brae more impressive than those of my beloved NES
unfurled across a portion of the screen no larger games, were often static in the non-3D
than the upper-left quadrant. All those hours, the sequences, usually containing only the barest hint
whole visual record of our explorations… it’s a of animation. Still, it didn’t matter – the game
little hard to believe the source of so much world, like a new codex, was there to be read
enjoyment had been a rectangle of two and a half and, more importantly, descried. The Bard’s Tale
by four inches; larger dimensions than the screen games required of the player a significant time
of even the latest and greatest hand-held commitment for play – not unusual for an RPG –
portable, to be sure, but pretty tiny real-estate for in addition to a certain deftness at plotting out the
what felt like a playground of epic proportions. dungeon maps on graph paper; massive subter-
As such, the infamous “rectangle” strikes me now ranean labyrinths made cartography supplies
as something of a singularity, space super- essential. These being the days before the
focused – all the three-dimensionality, city-streets Internet (if not exactly before the Arpanet), part of
and dungeon corridors, hurtling forward and The Bard’s Tale’s intrigue lay in the fact that the
passing away at break-neck speed across this series really seemed to evoke, and invoke, a kind
itty-bitty tableau… Skara Brae and the dungeons of communality which, despite the game techni-
seemed almost willfully condensed, compressed, cally containing only a “one-player mode,”
by their invisible creators. A kind of paradox, the implicitly encouraged the rudimentary tenets of
smallness of this window-on-the-world piquing something like “team play” – put one person on
so strong a sense of Skara Brae’s vastness; yet mapping duty, and swap shifts with another
the sensation existed, and thus did Skara Brae
feel all the more actual in its minuscule frame, * Maybe the data on the periphery of the game window reinforced the
black-hole/flip-dimension “reality” of Skara Brae that much more – in
like the glimpse of another dimension roiling and my mind’s eye all the updates and statistics resemble the sprawling
continuously surfacing at the center of a black science and quantum exchange that take the black-hole from the realm
of mysterious metaphor to light-bending reality. The numbers are
hole – the rest of the screen being occupied, of spinning at the cusp…
138 primagames.com
The proper title of the first game in the original series was intended as ‘Tales of the Unknown: The Bard’s Tale’ – but,
due in large part to the emphasis on the subtitle in the package design, the franchise became known as ‘The Bard’s Tale’
to fans (and the developers) for ever after.
player for consecutive stretches of nothing more The Bard’s Tale: A Chronology
than leveling up. (Oh, there was lots of leveling
up to be done in The Bard’s Tale, one random
monster encounter after another… and you could
Tales of the Unknown, Volume 1:
only save above ground, at the inn.) One felt
The Bard’s Tale
comfortably alone in the world playing the (1985, Interplay Productions / Electronic Arts)
missions of the game, as though there were no- Create a party of six adventurers, then travel
one else in a million-mile radius undertaking the through the streets of Skara Brae and dungeon
same adventure (one of the nice things about life after dungeon, in search of the wicked
before cyberspace); one could therefore take all Mangar.
the time in the universe to conquer the damn
thing without feeling like some San Antonio The Bard’s Tale II: The Destiny
maniac was putting in more hours per diem than Knight
you ever could. (1986, Interplay Productions / Electronic Arts)
Find the seven pieces of the Destiny Wand and
But there were other things that made the destroy the diabolical archmage Lagoth Zanta.
experience special, too – the unique packaging, There are now six cities to explore, in addition
for example, played a big part. All three Bard’s to a bank, a casino, and an expanded network
Tale games came in a kind of 10-inch 45-rpm of dungeons.
vinyl record sleeve, like a slip-case for the game’s
floppy disks. A wonderfully illustrated, sepia The Bard’s Tale III: Thief of Fate
manual added to the tactile pleasure. Perhaps (1988, Interplay Productions / Electronic Arts)
most potent, and certainly unique to my personal With auto-mapping and save-anywhere
experience of the game, was the fact that much features newly at your disposal, lead your party
of the ambience of our play sessions had been across seven dimensions to destroy Mangar’s
created by the environment around the computer
master, the Mad God Tarjan.
– the den in which we huddled, the crackling
fireplace behind us – the nutcracker and walnuts
atop the heavily-lacquered, oak-surface coffee-
The Bard’s Tale Construction Set
(1991, Interplay Productions)
table – the curio cabinet against the wall facing
the computer, eight feet away, inside of which, Put your design acumen to the test by creating
among my friend’s small library of games, stood your very own dungeon adventures. Try your
the box for another title, another legend of the hand at level layout, item creation, and monster
Golden Age – Wasteland – but that... that’s a tale genetics, then mix the ingredients into a home-
for another time. made recipe for that aromatic dish called
“Epicness.”
It all seemed to stand in for the flickering firelight
of the inn…
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The following interview was conducted in August and September of 2004 with the following members of the InXile production team:
Matt Findley (Creative Director), Brian Fargo (Executive Producer), Eric Flannum (Lead Designer), and Maxx Kaufman (Art Director).
Brian and Matt, you’re obviously aware that people have stark contrast to the day’s when the director was also heavily
been crying out for a new chapter in the “Bard’s Tale” saga involved in so much of the actual programming.
for some time – this is obviously a very different game than
the others. Can you say something about when you decided Brian: Ironically the concept of using a production mentality in
it was time to revisit the series, and when you decided to which the director (i.e., me) did not do the coding was the
take it in a new direction? Did these two ideas happen at genesis of the early Interplay success. As common sense as it
once, or did one follow the other? sounds, I always looked for experts in their fields to provide
their part of equation. This was not always the case some 20
Brian: I’ve wanted to revisit the series for some time but due years ago. But there is no doubt that the budgets have gotten
to timing issues I was not able to ever consider it. Once I left much bigger along with the team sizes. For many games that
Interplay I knew the first game would be an RPG, but I was not has translated to hollow-feeling games with great production
sure what the first one would be. It was then that I decided to values. But for us, we did want to keep that single-artistic-
pursue the concept of a new Bard’s Tale since it would be the vision feel that some of the old games used to have. We want
perfect beginning for the new company. As for the direction of to do games that offer innovative ideas and charm that you
the game, that really came about from playing all the recent don’t get from a factory.
RPGs and seeing how they approached the genre. My first
reaction was that the console RPGs for the most part still Brian, what was your take on the NES version of the “Bard’s
treated the audience like they were 12 years old, yet the Tale” game released by FCI? (The one in which the pub only
average player was closer to 30. I wanted to bring a PC intel- seemed to serve “grape juice.”)
ligence to the console world, much the way Knights of the Old
Republic ended up doing a bit later. Brian: The poor Bard must have been having a drinking
problem back then and had to only drink juice. Or perhaps it
Matt: Once we committed to doing The Bard’s Tale, we knew was vodka and grape. I vaguely remember that game but it
we had to push the genre in a new direction. The entire was just a port from PC to console with no consideration of the
category was so devoid of personality, and I found it to be console mentality.
really odd how seriously the games were taking themselves.
The style of writing in these games has not really grown at all How long did this project take from beginning to end (in
since the original Bard’s Tale, and we felt strongly that it was August 2004)? What were some of the most difficult
time for that to change. challenges you encountered in getting the game finished –
(logistical, technical, or both)?
Matt, how did you come to the “Bard’s Tale” series – do you
and Brian go way back, or did you first become familiar with Eric: Brian and Matt had already started the initial design
the games purely as a fan? when I came onboard around November of 2002. We staffed
up gradually from there as we began working through the
Matt: My first introduction to the Bard’s Tale series was just as design of the game. We didn’t start up full production until
a fan, playing the games on my college roommates’ computer. early in 2003 at which point we had the majority of our team
They inspired me to continue making games on my own, and in place. Most of our challenges occurred pretty early on in the
to pursue a job in the industry. It was actually a couple of process, as we were not only trying to create a game, but also
years later, after I played Wasteland in 1988 that I wanted to trying to create a company at the same time. Once everyone
go work for Brian at Interplay. I started working for Brian in had settled into their various roles things progressed quite
1989 and we worked together for 13 years until we left to start smoothly with our most egregious problem probably being
inXile. trying to find parking around here during the summer! (We
have the good fortune to have our offices located pretty close
Brian, what’s it like to revisit a series over a decade later, to the beach.)
when game development is no longer a matter of sitting
down and strictly coding, but working with art directors,
sound designers, texture artists, A.I. engineers, etc.? – a
140 primagames.com
“The Pup” in the game is actually modeled after Brian Fargo’s real-life dog!
How long did the music composition and recording process speaking parts in the game in total. In order to have the great
take? personality we were striving for, we felt the need to record all
the lines in the game. In general though, game players
Eric: We began working with Tommy Tallarico Studios very demand more quality than they did back in the days, so we
early in the development process. The entire process was needed to step up to the challenge and deliver what is
ongoing over probably the entire final year of production. expected.
How did the Scottish-Gaelic feel of the game come about? One of the things I love most about the game from an art-
design standpoint is how fabulously the characters are
Brian: The original Bard’s Tale took place in the city of Skara modeled. There doesn’t seem to be any of the insane blocky
Brae which was a small hamlet in the Orkney Islands. In that angularity to the human bodies that normally gets associated
first Bard’s Tale, the name of that city was nothing more than with American and European game titles. Were you kind of
a name. I decided to do some research on that part of the consciously throwing down the gauntlet here?
world and lo and behold it has a rich vein of fantasy subject
matter that was both original and somewhat familiar at the Maxx: When creating the characters we made a concerted
same time. It was fascinating to discover that folklore, and see effort to make them as interesting as possible. We wanted the
what an impact it had on J.R.R. Tolkien and Dungeons & player to be intrigued by the characters’ faces and bodies. As
Dragons. an example, when we created the shopkeepers we
exaggerated the features of their faces and bodies.
At what point in the game’s conception did you decide to
rebel against the “same old RPG” conventions? Related to the character models, is their extraordinary detail
(textures aside) accomplished by a high polygon count, or
Eric: This happened pretty early in development as it was one something closer to the kind of “spline-based” models we
of the main things that Brian and Matt had always had in mind read about every now and then…?
for the game. Of course, right at the beginning we didn’t intend
the game to be an outright comedy. We wanted the game to Maxx: All models were created with polygons in 3ds max. The
have humorous elements and characters, but didn’t want average polygon-count per character was 3000. The textures
things to get too wacky. As we began to write and design the were created at high resolution and then reduced to fit the
game, eliminating things we didn’t like and emphasizing things memory restrictions of the PlayStation2. I believe the combi-
we liked, we found that the comedic elements were really nation of high-resolution textures and the polygon-count
standing out as the highpoints of the game. It wasn’t long until accounts for their detail.
undead sheep, giant chickens, and too many guys named
Bodb worked their way into the design and the game became What are your feelings about the move from the traditional
a lot more comedic and silly. We went from mocking a few of 4:3 aspect ratio to the 16:9 “widescreen” ratio on newer
the old tried and true conventions to outright lampooning a television sets? Is it a wider canvas to play with, or does it
genre we are all terribly fond of. force the developer to make every environment “super
wide”? Also, do you find that in a top-down or isometric
The game’s dialogue is legitimately witty and seems game, it paradoxically makes the game-environment more
extremely well conceived in so many parts, given what claustrophobic, in that there’s an expanded sense of width
normally passes for the writing in video games – who did the but not a lot in the way of “seeing ahead, north or south”?
majority of the script, and what kind of boundaries, if any,
were placed on the dialogue beforehand? Eric: Although we haven’t seen games exclusively for
widescreen yet, I imagine when we do it will change how
Brian: We decided to have us designers (myself, Matt Findley, some of the more traditional game perspectives are dealt with.
and Eric Flannum) take the first pass at all the design and For example, in a game with [The Bard’s Tale’s] perspective,
dialogue since we had a strong background in game design. the developer could utilize the extra space for a split screen
And while none of us was particularly strong in dialogue, we mode or interface elements (such as maps, health displays).
knew how to set up some fresh and interesting situations. We Extra space available on a screen is really only going to be a
then turned our situations over to the dialogue writers who good thing as we are constantly running out of screen real-
took our material to the next step and made it more enter- estate when we are planning out our designs.
taining than what we had done alone. We didn’t have many
boundaries other than to not rely on or use any topical ideas The series was originally created by Michael Cranford, whom
that would require someone to know anything outside the Brian Fargo shared Scenario Design duties with on the
world we created. original two games. Did Michael have any input on this
project at all? What does he make of this next-gen incar-
How long did the voice recording sessions take? Why does nation of the series?
it seem like there are so many more competent voice actors
nowadays (especially on this game) than there were back in Brian: Michael did not give input on the project, but I did bring
the era of, say, “Last Alert” on the TurboGrafx-16? Is it just him in to show the direction when it was about halfway done.
that the money’s a lot bigger? He absolutely loved the humor and the approach we took to
it.
Brian: The voice recording sessions were quite long. We spent
20 hours with Cary Elwes alone, and there were over 100
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Many players of The Bard’s Tale wouldn’t be surprised to learn that the game’s titular
Bard wasn’t the only Scots-based bloke to regale his countrymen with rhythm and lyric.
Born on January 25th, 1759, Robert Burns would go on to become one of the most central and beloved figures in
Scotland’s rich cultural tapestry. A poet and songwriter of wild lyrical invention, Burns predates fellow-Scotsman Stuart
Murdoch (of Belle & Sebastian fame) with his finely tuned blend of wry domestic portraiture and sentimental “occasional”
verse. It was at the age of fifteen – fifteen – that the young poet first came into renown, galvanizing city- and country-
folk alike with the 1786 publication of his volume entitled Poems, Chiefly in the Scottish Dialect. As you’ll witness below,
the “Scottish dialect” is not the Queen’s English; it’s likely that any readers who have begun their college survey courses
in literature will sniff out some easy similarities with Geoffrey Chaucer, by means of the slightly “understand-it-here, baffle-
me-there” shuffle of the vocabulary – a sort of “pre-mix,” if you will, of our modern English. But where Chaucer versified
plump friars and courtly love, Burns advocated the fall of organized religion and the rise of Courtney Love – which is to
say, all things colloquial, from the pleasures of whiskey to maudlin sing-a-longs at New Year’s Eve. (Yes, the lyric to “Auld
Lang Syne” comes straight from Burns’s pen... well, except maybe for the first verse and the chorus, which he’s said to
have discovered jotted on a pub napkin.)
Below you’ll find some first-rate examples of Burns’s verse – picking up an edition of the Burns songbook or collected
poems from your local library or bookstore is highly recommended. Press “pause,” if only for a couple hours, and explore
this other strange, hilarious, and exhilarating realm…
From “To a Mouse” – From “Scotch Drink” – From “Green Grow the
Rashes, O” * –
I’m truly sorry man’s dominion O thou, my Muse! guid, auld Scotch Drink!
Has broken nature’s social union, Whether thro’ wimplin worms tho jink, Green grow the rashes, O;
An’ justifies that ill opinion Or, richly brown, ream owre the brink, Green grow the rashes, O;
Which makes thee startle In glorious faem, The sweetest hours that e’er I spend,
At me, thy poor, earth-born companion Inspire me, till I lisp an’ wink, Are spent amang the lasses, O.
An’ fellow-mortal! To sing thy name!
For you sae douse, ye sneer at this,
… … Ye’re nought but senseless asses, O;
The wisest Man the warl’ saw,
But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane, When neebors anger at a plea, He dearly lov’d the lasses, O. …
In proving foresight may be vain; An’ just as wud as wud can be,
The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men How easy can the barley-brie
Gang aft a-gley, Cement the quarrel!
* (see also R.E.M.’s “Green Grow the Rushes,”
An’ lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain, It’s aye the chepeast Lawyer’s fee from their 1985 album Fables of the
For promis’d joy! … To taste the barrel. … Reconstruction, which in some ways as effec-
tively captures the American South as Burns
does the genial Scots character – “Green grow
the rushes go / The compass points the
worker home.”)
142 primagames.com
To make the perfect Black and Tan, keep two fingers inside of the pint-glass while pouring,
then let some warm water trickle in before switching. This is known as a “Paul Shea.”
By now you’ve probably spent plenty of time drinking in were possible for an instant. Well, that's sorta what ale
the pubs of The Bard’s Tale, and as you make your way to tastes like, if that moment tasted like flat soda.
the end of this guide, you might discover that all this virtual
pub-time has left you with more questions than answers Lager: Pronounced "logger" – from the French Admiral
about the real thing. Tried your hand at wine drinking, and Pierre L'Enfant Lougerre, who led his troops during the
realized it’s not your bag? Had dilemmas choosing which Napoleonic Wars. “Lougerre,” loosely translated, means
beer is good for you at the trendy local microbrewery, "to drink softly" or "to sip." This beer is named for the
because of the foreign-sounding names of the brews? admiral who, although unable to maintain munitions or a
(Even the experts can't tell you what the difference is basic supply-line while leading his troops through the
between the "summer brew" and the "winter brew," by the harsh German and harsher Russian winters, never broke
way.) Well, you needn't bluff your way trough an awkward said lines for any beer brewed by locals. The phrase "he's
beer conversation anymore – this is your novice guide to got a lager in his pants" comes from Lougerre’s practice of
all popular types of beer. It might get you started on what permitting his troops to carry bottles of lager, secreted
could be a lifelong passion. But remember, never drink away in their pants pockets, onto the battlefield. They
and drive, not even on a Segway Human Transport. drank merrily – until they were slayed like the dogs that
they were. In its thick brew, you can almost taste the
Mead: As those D&D'ers already know, it's hard to find a blood of so many countless wasted lives. These men
place that serves mead, and almost as hard to find anyone didn't pee in their pants, they were just shot in the groin.
with any familiarity with it whatsoever (putting aside those
kindred souls in the Society for Creative Anachronism). Ice: If you guessed "marketing scheme," award yourself
Dropping the word "mead" in a conversation in the same two points. Then refer yourself to the description of Ale.
sentence as "honey" and "Beowulf" has never failed to get
laugh in the right crowd. But, we're sure that if you ever Pilsner: “Pilsner” starts with a “p,” because it’s the politic
do get a taste of it that you'll enjoy its blueberry, almost drinker who imbibes this brew; in one way or another,
cranberry, aroma. every pilsner-drinker is a social-member of the P.A.C., or
Pilsner Action Committee. You can't dim nor can you
Bock: The Thor of all beers. You might think it gets its outdebate the sharp acidity and rigid malty taste of a
name from the pleasurable, yet subtle, metallic attack with standard pilsner. Well, you could, but you'd be wrong to
which the beer hits the front of your palate when it do so. So don't do it. Unpatriotic. Don't question it.
splashes onto the front of your tongue. Or, maybe it gets
its name from the rosin-like froth that foams at the top of Porter: The cousin of the steak that goes by the same
a heaping flagon. Perhaps you think it’s because it’s been name. The beer that helped build the Transcontinental
brewed for centuries by the Nordic people, whose Railroad. Because of its heartiness, it was served on trains
seafaring ways can be detected in the salty aftertaste that before refrigeration techniques became what they are
keeps you wanting to drink more and more of the stuff. today. It was also the most common beer drunk during
Nope – it's none of that. It's because this beer will smack Prohibition. But not so fast – “historical relevancy” doesn't
you in the head with an iron hammer by the amount they mean “tasty.” In an era when hard alcohol tasted so bad
charge for this stuff. Ridiculous. Puh-leeeeze. that mixed drinks were invented to dilute the flavor, what
do you think a warm porter tasted like?
Ale: The most common beer drunk throughout Western
Europe. Remember a few years back when the Berlin NearBeer: Also known as “non-alcoholic beer.” If you
Tigers kicked the game-ending field goal in overtime to guessed "marketing scheme that never caught on" then
defeat the Barcelona Well-Wishers, thus winning the first refer yourself to the description for Ale once more, only
NFL Überbowlentasse? The terror that struck your heart add subtle flavors of rejuvenated dried-up, chewed-up
when it looked like the snap had been botched; followed gum.
by the elation, the utter out-of-control unity felt by an
entire city, nay, an entire nation, as the ball ever so slightly Stout: Well, you've made it this far. You may as well know
clipped the left pole and bounced safely through the T. this: After the first sip of beer, every beer tastes the same.
Men raised their hands, strangers hugged strangers, Really. Try it. I've won more bar bets this way. After the
mothers kissed their children, children pumped their fists, first beer, the taste becomes indistinguishable from dish
girlfriends left boyfriends for richer men, boys kissed water. No joke.
peach-fuzzed and hairy-faced girls. It felt like all things
primagames.com 143
PRIMA OFFICIAL GAME GUIDE
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appened of our
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144 primagames.com