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"I" Statements Worksheet

This document discusses how to use "I" statements to communicate assertively. "I" statements help express feelings and concerns without blaming others. The document provides examples of ineffective "you" statements and outlines a format for constructive "I" statements. It includes scenarios to practice transforming situations into "I" statements and reflection questions.

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minhot525
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216 views5 pages

"I" Statements Worksheet

This document discusses how to use "I" statements to communicate assertively. "I" statements help express feelings and concerns without blaming others. The document provides examples of ineffective "you" statements and outlines a format for constructive "I" statements. It includes scenarios to practice transforming situations into "I" statements and reflection questions.

Uploaded by

minhot525
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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“I” STATEMENT WORKSHEET

"I" statements are closely related to anger management and


assertiveness because it helps individuals express their feelings,
needs, and concerns in a clear and non-confrontational manner.

When you use "I" statements, you take ownership of your emotions
and reactions, rather than blaming or accusing others. This can be
particularly helpful in managing your anger because it allows you to
communicate assertively without escalating conflicts.

At times when you communicate your feelings about something, or


what you want from others, you make ‘you’ statements. These
statements imply some kind of fault or blame directed at the other
person. Here are some examples of ‘you’ statements –

 "You always interrupt me during meetings, and it's disrespectful."


 "You never follow through on your commitments, and it's affecting our
team's productivity."
 "You're constantly late with your reports, and it's causing delays in our
project timeline."
 "You're not pulling your weight on the team, and it's unfair to the rest of
us who are working hard."
 "You're making mistakes on these documents, and it's making our
department look bad."

These kinds of statements usually elicit reactions such as


defensiveness from the other person, which can provoke a
counterattack. Instead of real communication occurring, chances are
things will develop into an argument.

DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR? HOW CAN WE CHANGE THIS PATTERN?

Making ‘you’ statements can be a way of avoiding having to


acknowledge our own feelings and placing the responsibility for how
we feel onto someone else. ‘I’ statements make it clear how we feel.
For this reason they can be perceived as exposing us or making us
more vulnerable, and using them can take a bit of getting used to.
However, after a while ‘I’ statements can become quite liberating, as
they’re a useful tool in communicating more assertively.
They do carry risk, though, because they involve asking the other
person for what you want. Which, of course, means the other person is
free to say “no”.

‘I’ STATEMENTS ARE MADE UP OF FOUR PARTS:

1. “I feel ...” (taking responsibility for your own feelings)


2. “when you ...” (stating the behaviour that is a problem)
3. “because ...” (what it is about the behaviour or its consequences
that you don’t like)
4. “I would really like it if ...” (offering a preferred alternative or
compromise)

Example:

1. “I feel frustrated
2. “when you interrupt me during meetings
3. “because it disrupts the flow of discussion and makes it challenging
for everyone to contribute effectively
4. “I would really like it if we could establish a system where we take
turns speaking or raise our hands to signal when we want to
contribute, ensuring that everyone's voice is heard and the meetings
run smoothly

EXERCISE:
Read each workplace scenario carefully and consider how you would
assertively communicate your feelings and needs in each situation.
Rewrite the scenario into an "I" statement, incorporating the four
parts: "I feel...", "when...", "because...", "I would really like it if..."
Scenario # 1: Your manager frequently criticizes your work in front of your
colleagues, causing embarrassment and undermining your confidence.
How would you assertively communicate your feelings and needs in this
situation using an "I" statement?

Scenario # 2: Your team member consistently fails to meet deadlines,


putting extra pressure on you to pick up the slack.
How could you express your concerns assertively using an "I" statement in
this scenario?

Scenario # 3: Your supervisor micromanages your every move, making you


feel suffocated and undervalued.
Transform this scenario into an "I" statement to assertively convey your
feelings and needs.

Scenario # 4: Your colleague takes credit for your ideas during team
meetings, leaving you feeling frustrated and overlooked.

How might you assertively address this situation using an "I" statement?

Scenario # 5: Your boss dismisses your suggestions without consideration,


making you feel
unappreciated and disengaged.
In what way could you use an "I" statement to assertively communicate
your feelings and needs in this scenario?

Scenario # 6: Your boss dismisses your suggestions without consideration,


making you feel
unappreciated and disengaged.
In what way could you use an "I" statement to assertively communicate
your feelings and needs in this scenario?
Scenario # 7: Your team member consistently arrives late for meetings,
causing disruptions and delaying progress.
How would you assertively address this behavior using an "I" statement?

Scenario # 8: Your supervisor constantly changes project requirements


without proper
communication, causing confusion and inefficiency.
How could you assertively communicate your feelings and needs regarding
this issue using an "I" statement?

REFLECTION QUESTIONS:

1. How did you feel while completing the worksheet? Did any of the
scenarios resonate with experiences you've had in your workplace?

2. Reflect on the process of transforming each scenario into an "I"


statement. Did you find it challenging to express your feelings
assertively while maintaining professionalism?

3. Consider the impact of assertive communication on workplace


dynamics. How do you think assertively addressing concerns can
contribute to a positive work environment?

4. Review your "I" statements. Do you feel that they effectively


communicate your emotions, address the problematic behavior or
situation, and propose constructive solutions or requests?

5. Imagine implementing the assertive communication techniques


discussed in the worksheet in your workplace. How do you think your
colleagues or supervisors would respond? What challenges or
opportunities do you anticipate?

6. Reflect on any insights or realizations you gained from completing the


worksheet. What steps can you take to incorporate assertive
communication into your daily interactions at work?
7. Identify any areas where you feel you need further support or
development in assertive communication. How can you continue to
strengthen your assertiveness skills over time?

8. Lastly, consider how you can apply the principles of assertive


communication not only in the workplace but also in other aspects of
your life. How might assertiveness benefit your personal relationships
and overall well-being?

Reference:

Therapist Aid. (2017). “I” statements. https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/i-statements

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