Answers to coursebook activities

3 Reading skills – directed response

3.1 What is directed writing?
Activity 1
The original passage:

1 The focus is the feelings of a single woman who has no children.

2 The form is an article from an online newspaper.

3 The writer is a single woman.

4 Her viewpoint isn’t given directly but the task implies that she doesn’t like complaining mothers
(otherwise she probably wouldn’t have written the article).

The response:

1 The focus is advice about parenting skills for young people.

2 The form is a blog, which would usually be very personal, but because it is offering professional
advice, it will have a more objective, balanced style.

3 The directed response should be written from the perspective of an agony aunt/uncle.

4 The viewpoint needs to be balanced, not giving precedence to one specific approach.

Practice activity
Students’ responses might include the following.

The text you are asked to read:

 The original text is about young people choosing to leave London due to the high cost of living.

 The text type is an article/newspaper report from an online edition of a newspaper.

 No information is given about the writer, so assume it is a journalist.

 No viewpoint is suggested in the task description, but the article probably covers the ‘advantages’
of leaving London.

The text you are asked to write:

 The new text should be about the advantages to living and working in London.

 The form will be a letter.

 It should be written in the role of an employer.

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  The purpose/viewpoint is to attract young people to work in London and possibly to express
disagreement with some of the views of the original article.

Example response:

While the first text is an article expected to provide a range of examples of how young people have
benefited from leaving London, there is no mention of the writer’s own views. It is likely to include
comments from different people, and provide background to the issue. The second text, which is in the
form of a letter, will be personal and represent a contrasting view. As a letter, it will directly respond to
the points made, and also have a particular ‘voice’ that represents the perspective of the employer. It
will be directed at a different audience – the writer of the article (and perhaps the readers of the paper)
whereas the article will be solely intended for readers.

3.2 Planning your directed response

Activity 1
Students’ own responses. Mind maps may show some of the following ideas:

 Life outside London: running own coffee shop by the sea; opening an antique shop; work
remotely; lunchtime swims; midweek days off; quietness; fresh air; ‘do whatever you want’; more
free time; try out new hobbies (i.e. yoga).

 Life in London: extortionate rents; poor quality of life; can’t afford to go out; can seem a ‘playground
for the rich’; working all the time then staying in; not being to afford to try out new hobbies.

Activity 2
Ideas that students may add to the table:

Points against London Language use Meaning or interpretation

Only for the rich: ‘I felt like it was Imagery – metaphor of child’s Only wealthy people could have
merely a playground for the rich’ playground fun and feel free, as children do
in a playground.
Kept people out: ‘I didn’t really Use of the verb ‘belong’ Didn’t fit her identity – she felt
belong there’ excluded.
Leisure costs too high: ‘…even Idiom – ‘pretty good wage’ and Despite having a reasonable
though I earned a pretty good subordinating conjunction ‘even wage, she couldn’t live life to the
wage, my life was forced to be a though’ full (it was ‘small’).
bit small’

Activity 3
Ideas that students may add to the table:

Positive benefits of moving Language use Effect

elsewhere
‘…while enjoying lunchtime Phrase – ‘enjoying lunchtime Sense of leisurely relaxation
swims and midweek days off’ swims’, meaning taking pleasure breaking up working week, and
in having dips in the sea at a time that would not usually
be available to them.

‘It also feels like you can do General phrase with modal ‘can’ Ability to pick the path/direction

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 whatever you want here’ you want rather than being
controlled by outside forces.

Activity 4
Possible other points:

 London is an international city – being there can lead to prospects all over the world.

 Working in London will look good on a CV.

 London is particularly good for certain professions: tourism, finance, the media, IT – some of these
might be more difficult to pursue elsewhere.

The points students might select as an employer would be those relating particularly to work and
career, although the other points are still relevant: people choose workplaces because of lifestyle, after
all, so there are no ‘wrong’ points here.

Activity 5
Example response:

Dear [name of reporter]

Intro: Mention article and my view – article is too one-sided and negative, there are many positives to
living in London.

Para 1: London provides many job opportunities with higher salaries; for ambitious people who are
pursuing careers being in London would be useful – if not essential – to getting on in life.

Para 2: Besides career, London offers so much that you cannot put a price on and indeed are free to
enjoy – parks, museums, galleries, famous monuments and history, the vibrancy of the city and its
people. There is also public transport connecting to every part of the city and you can walk and cycle
to almost anywhere.

Conclusion: London can be expensive but it is possible to live there happily and doing so is within
reach of most people, especially if you are prepared to take advantage of what is free and make the
most of its opportunities. Yours etc.

Activity 6
Key points made by the writer:

 Victoria Beckham – a rich person – had a pretty good life with her three boys before her daughter
came along.

 Women who have children are blessed; they should stop complaining.

 If mothers have problems they can be overcome; but you can never overcome not having a child.

 Being single and alone can be as expensive as having a child.

 Mothers have gained a ‘better’ identity, and are treated as superior by society.

Notable uses of form, structure and language students might identify:

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  ‘Enough. Enough already’ – single repeated interjection to an imagined speech by mothers

 ‘as ridiculous as her heels’ – simile to express the silly nature of Victoria Beckham’s complaints

 ‘Yes, her life making frocks in LA with David and three gorgeous boys must have been torture
before’ – exaggerated use of ‘torture’ expresses sarcastic response

 ‘…give it a break. Give me a break. Give women like me, who wanted children but don’t have
them, a break’ – repetition of ‘break’, with its informal tone, speaks directly to mothers, as does the
constant use of ‘I’ and ‘me’

 ‘You got the prize. You have the child. Rejoice’ – rhetorical patterning of two short sentences,
followed by the single-word imperative

 ‘So raising a child is expensive? So is being single and living alone. You are tired and shattered?
That must be horrible. [...] You feel you have lost your identity? Well, I’d say you’ve gained a better
one.’ – use of questions to suggest a dialogue to which the writer has the responses to hand.

Powerful imagery includes:

 ‘snuggling up to your warm, chubby baby’

 ‘crying congratulations down the phone’

 ‘I was once asked to get off a bus so a woman with a pram could get on’.

Powerful assertions include:

 ‘Mothers are treated as superior citizens’

 ‘the world can’t get enough of you’.

Activity 7
Students’ own responses. Ideas might include:

 Parenthood can be tough – there’s a lot to do – especially if you work as well.

 Parenting can be tiring and emotional but this is a common feeling, and usually it will pass, or you
will find ways of coping with it. The pleasure of having a child will help you forget the tough times.

 Being a parent means you enter a community of other parents who share the same experience –
this is very lucky.

 Parenting is a lifetime commitment; it doesn’t end when your children ‘grow up’.

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 3.3 Matching tone to purpose and audience
Activity 1
An advert in a magazine for young professionals which promotes the benefits of living in London:

 form: advert in a magazine

 audience: young professionals (working people)

 purpose: to promote benefits of living in London.

A speech by a young person who lives outside London given to his/her classmates giving reasons why
he/she would like to move to London to work or study:

 form: speech

 audience: classmates

 purpose: to explain the reasons for moving to London (so there will be an element of
persuasion/argument).

A letter from an older person to the writer of the article explaining why life outside a big city isn’t as
good as it is portrayed in the article

 form: letter

 audience: the writer of the original article

 purpose: to explain why life outside city isn’t as good as it might seem.

The advert is most different from the original article in form and structure.

The letter from the older person is probably the role that is most different.

Activity 2
Students role-play in pairs.

Activity 3
 Five reasons why young people should stay in London:

o ‘the wide range of free cultural events, access to fascinating galleries and museums and the
verdant parks, cost little or nothing’

o ‘exclude themselves from the job opportunities and higher wages’

o possible ‘higher wages’

o ‘not everyone can work remotely: meeting face-to-face with colleagues is vitally important in
business’

o ‘rich, diverse community’.

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  Counter-argument before giving his/her view: ‘Firstly, I believe that whilst London is undeniably
expensive, there are many ways young people can manage to have fulfilling lives.’

 First person followed by verbs, expressing belief or opinion, or calling readers to act: ‘I need to
provide’; ‘I believe’; ‘I feel’, ‘I urge’.

 Connective words or phrases to link key points or paragraphs: ‘Firstly’, ‘in addition’, ‘besides’, ‘in
conclusion’.

 Variety of shorter and longer sentences for explanation or impact: (shorter sentences) ‘London is a
rich, diverse community which has a lot to offer.’; ‘We need you, and you need London.’

 Positive or negative adjectives to convey key points: ‘undeniably expensive’, ‘free cultural events’,
‘fascinating galleries’, ‘verdant parks’, ‘prestigious companies’, ‘rich, diverse community’.

Activity 4
Specific formal features:

 appropriate opening welcome and conclusion

 written in continuous prose broken by paragraphs

 appropriately formal register.

Structure of the text:

 opening paragraph sets out context for letter

 subsequent paragraphs deal with separate topics (paragraph 2: cost of living; paragraph 3: job
opportunities)

 final paragraph offers a concluding argument, targeting readers directly.

 past simple tense is used for the opening explanation (‘I read’); thereafter, the present tense is
mostly used to express the situation now. There is some use of modal forms to express ability,
possibility or certainty: ‘young people can manage to have fulfilling lives’; ‘not everyone can work
remotely’; ‘young people will exclude themselves’.

Activity 5
Students’ own responses – discussion following the guidance given.

Activity 6
1 Passage 3 is the best choice.

2 It is the most suitable because the tone of the blog needs to be professional, balanced and fair,
and to appeal to young people. It speaks directly but is not over-personal (there is no use of the
first person ‘I’), sticking to the issues. ‘You might think’ is a gentle way of provoking a response.

Example response for the completed blog task:

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 Two top tips for tired mums

Anyone who has ever looked after children for an extended period knows this: it is hard work! Sure,
the celebrity mothers who parade their ‘have it all’ lifestyle all over the media can be annoying but I
know the vast majority of you mothers out there have lifestyles that are much less glamorous, much
less fake, much more real, and much more challenging.

No doubt about it: motherhood is rewarding. But also no doubt about it: motherhood is hard work. That
is, if you want to do a good job. How to cope with all the demands?

This is the first bit of advice: child care is tiring work so get help. If you have a partner, ask, encourage
– or even tell them if you have to – to help. Second, look after yourself too. Don’t try to be everybody’s
mummy. Don’t try to be a mum all the time. Make sure, as much as you can, that you get some
exercise, decent food and enough sleep. And have some rest – a downtime, with your partner if you
have one, as well as on your own. Watch a movie or soap opera, go for a walk, read a book. Just get
your rest. It will make you a better mum.

3.4 Comparing form, structure and language

Activity 1
a Although/While/Even though my text has a direct, immediate style, the original article is more
reflective and thoughtful.

b The original article uses vivid imagery to describe city life. Likewise, my version does too.

c Structurally, the ending of the letter is stiff and formal. However/Yet/In contrast/Whereas/While my
blog has an informal, chatty tone.

Activity 2
Students’ own answers. Any relevant examples that meet the criteria are acceptable. Some ideas
include:

 Provide a succinct overview of both pieces of writing: As well as the highlighted example about the
first text, this section from the commentary: ‘In contrast, the letter from the employer is more
personal, expressed throughout in the first person, with no question as to where his/her
sympathies lie. However, the overall tone is authoritative and largely formal, conveying a sense of
professionalism.’

 Comment on the different styles and qualities of both passages: The letter also differs from the
article in being set out logically as a series of arguments: ‘firstly’, ‘in addition’, and so on.

 Explain the effects of different linguistic and structural features: ‘Violet uses emotive imagery such
as describing London as a “playground for the rich”, suggesting young people are pawns in a
greater game.’

 Refer precisely to evidence or quotation from each text: Any comment that specifically refers to
words, phrases or sentences lifted from the text or sums up those references – e.g. ‘The sense
that the article is broadly in agreement with the interviewees is emphasised by the use of statistical
data to back up the opinions expressed, and by the inclusion at the end of “expert testimony” from
Dan Wilson Craw, a campaigner on the issue.’

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 Activity 3
The overall tone/mood created is uplifting and positive, which connects emotional well-being and
aspirations to the city.

Particular noteworthy use of vocabulary or grammatical patterns:

 use of the present tense to provide immediacy

 repeated use of the pronoun ‘you’ to establish direct contact with the reader

 succinct imperative title with exclamation to engage the reader: ‘Free your mind in London!’

 repeated imperative ‘Imagine’, which creates a rhetorical accumulation of ideas

 repeated determiner ‘every’, which emphasises the wide range of possibility

 repeated phrase structure ‘from … to’, which builds the same idea of wide opportunity

 use of ‘Now’ to shift to the idea of change and the possibility of the ‘dream’ becoming real.

Particular formal conventions which are typical of advertisements:

 opening punchy title that sums up the overall message of ‘freedom’

 idea of selling a lifestyle – that the ‘buyer’ will profit emotionally as well as in other ways

 incitement to join the ‘in-crowd’: ‘be part of…’.

Any structural or linguistic devices:

 extended metaphor of London as a living thing (‘nation’s beating heart, its lifeblood, its pulse’)

 use of vivid adjectives to concisely sum up places (‘beautiful parks from rolling Richmond Park to
elegant St James’s Park’).

Activity 4
Examples responses:

While both texts begin with an imperative – ‘Meet’ and ‘Free’ – the advert’s heading is much punchier
and more direct, with its simple imperative use of ‘Free’. In addition, by using the possessive pronoun
‘your’, it gives the impression that it is speaking directly to the reader, establishing a shared bond.

Overall, the opening to the advert is a challenge, advocating a particular change in one’s life while the
article’s is more suggesting that the reader can encounter a range of people who may have some
interesting experiences to offer.

Activity 5
1 Students should evaluate the effects of any of the following: sentence length, punctuation, the use
of coordinating and subordinating conjunctions, sentence structure (simple, compound, complex,
compound-complex), and sentence form and function (declarative/statement,

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 interrogative/question, imperative/command, exclamative/exclamation) – as well as evaluate the
effects of any variations in the patterns of sentences within the texts. For example:

The ‘Free your mind’ advertisement makes use of shorter, simple sentences as well as
rhetorical questions to engage the reader. This fits with the persuasive purpose of the text. As
well as interrogatives the advertisement makes use of exclamatory sentences to add further
drama and impact as when it emphasises that London’s parks are free to use. The article on
the other hand, is more discursive in style and tone and as such uses longer compound and
complex sentences. Direct speech is also used to report the experiences of the young people
forced to leave London due to high rent and property prices.

2 The article makes use of idioms such as ‘bucking the tradition’, set him back’ and ‘upped sticks’.
There is also metaphorical use of language in the article but this is of an embedded more subtle
kind such as in ‘extortionate rent’, i.e. the rent is not literally extortion. The advert, on the other
hand does not have any noticeable uses of idioms whereas its use of imagery is quite strong as in
‘beating heart’, ‘lifeblood’ and ‘pulse’ all in the opening sentence and all from the same semantic
field of the body and its cardiovascular system, Other imagery used in the advert includes ‘open
arms’ and ‘feel the force’.

3.5 Practice and self-assessment

Step 1
Key words:

 words: ‘family of coffee drinkers’; ‘cost of coffee’

 role: ‘one of one author’s children’

 form: ‘Write a diary entry’

 focus: ‘mother’s reactions, and how you feel about it’.

Initial thoughts about structures, conventions or language devices:

 structures: continuous prose, possibly one paragraph reflecting a stream of ideas rather than a
considered, ordered setting out of information

 conventions: feelings about the ongoing situation composed in first person present tense – ‘I
feel/think’, and so on; recount specific events in various past tense forms; past continuous: (‘we
were sitting down’) and past perfect (‘we had just sat down when…’); also possible future forms
about what will or might happen (‘If she behaves like this…’, ‘I will definitely not be bringing my
friends home if…’ )

 language: sense of immediacy – this is not a reflection on matters that have happened years back,
so possibly emotive adjectives and/or intensifiers (‘stunned’, ‘totally shocked by…’); possible use
of rhetorical questions (‘Can’t she see it’s dead embarrassing?’); use of punctuation, particularly
exclamation marks to convey an aggrieved attitude, humour, guilt, as appropriate.

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 Step 2
Example response:

 Mum embarrasses me when she huffs about in a bad mood in the kitchen after a walk.

 She interrupted the time I was spending with William.

 I don’t like that she confronted William about making half a pot of coffee.

 I just want to relax and drink coffee in the kitchen without Mum creating an atmosphere.

 Maybe I need to talk to Mum about this.

Step 3
Students read the sample response and its accompanying comments.

Step 4
Example response:

Mum is so embarrassing sometimes! Coming in from walking Goldie and huffing and puffing around the
kitchen while I’m talking with William. What’s her problem? I live here too. I didn’t like what she said to
William. Make half a pot! Why? It’s not as if we’re hard up. I just want to be able to hang out with my
boyfriend in my own house. I just want to relax. William is hypersensitive and he finds Mum intimidating.
He said he doesn’t feel welcome here after what she said. I had to calm him down. I know Mum
probably wants some peace and quiet … maybe I should tell her I understand that … I don’t want to
argue – I hate it when there’s an atmosphere in the house. I guess I should make an effort though. She
does work hard and maybe it wasn’t so bad what she said. William could be more mature about it too.

Step 5
Students read the sample response and its accompanying comments. They may notice that it makes a
number of good points but these could be developed further. More detailed analysis of lexis, grammar
and semantic elements with respect to form, structure and language would also improve it. In the
article, this could be commenting on the subject-specific lexis of ‘coffee’ and ‘coffee-making’, the use
of first person pronouns and possessives, and humorous comparisons and their effects (e.g.
Starbucks and Goldilocks and the Three Bears). In the student’s diary entry, use of first person
pronouns could be commented upon, as well as the use of declarative and interrogative sentences.
The student could also consider how the diary entry could be rewritten to more closely resemble
speech or the fragmentary nature of thought – e.g. by using dashes, ellipses or simply by inserting
more fragments instead of complete sentences.

Step 6
Example response:

My own text is the same [1] in that it has personal feelings because it is a diary – I say ‘I do feel a bit
guilty’. However it is from my perspective as a child of the writer so I am not so fussed about things. [2]

Also my diary text is about what has happened that day – so I say ‘My mother was very annoying
today’ – I use ‘today’ to make this clear. Also there is the date at the start. [3]

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 I also use more informal expressions because I’m younger, like ‘the big deal’ and ‘I guess’. Also diaries
are used for thinking things over so I ask questions of myself like ‘Maybe I should purchase another
one?’. My diary also doesn’t have fancy or funny comparisons - it’s just me giving my views. [4]

[1] a correct, if rather simplistic response, but the phrase ‘the same’ creates the comparison

[2] expressed in a rather informal way – needs to be more precise about tone and register: ‘Fussed
about’ means ‘bothered;’ what ‘things’ are being referred to?

[3] correct, if rather basic point referring to the use of ‘Today’

[4] fair observations, but they combine several quite different points; referring to ‘informal expressions’
is helpful, but in fact some formal usage is more noticeable (e.g. ‘purchase’ instead of ‘buy’); a wider
vocabulary about tone would help with precision (e.g. using terms like ‘reflective or ‘self-analytical’
rather than ‘thinking things over’).

Step 7
Example response:

The coffee article’s title expresses the central themes of the piece. ‘Fraught with danger’ conveys the
frustration the writer has but this is melodramatic considering the domestic setting, while ‘since my
adult kids got in on the act’ sets up the conflict between the writer and her children that will be
explored in the article.

The first paragraph tells us about coffee and reveals that the writer’s kids have not left home. In the
second paragraph we find out how important coffee is to the writer. She uses adjectives like ‘special’,
‘precious’ and ‘favourite’ to say how much she likes having her 11 o’clock coffee. Other subject-
specific lexis, such as, ‘Medium-strength blend’, ‘Italian macchinetta’, ‘French roast’, ‘Kenyan medium
roast’, ‘latte or a mocha’ shows the writer’s knowledge and passion for good-quality coffee.

The rest of the article shows how her children and her friends behave. The writer compares her
kitchen to ‘Starbucks’, which is a coffee-shop chain. This must make her feel like an outsider, as she
feels as anonymous in her own kitchen as she might in a Starbucks coffee shop. She clearly doesn’t
like this experience and comments that the adult children present ‘don’t even glance up’.

She then describes the scene as if we are there. She uses the present tense – ‘I hate to be mean’ – so
it’s like we see it through her eyes. She also uses informal language, which adds a chatty tone to the
piece – ‘kids’ and the short sentence ‘Problem sorted’, for example.

The article comes to life because there is not just description but also direct speech. The writer speaks
to William, Lily and Megan. The article ends with a really good analogy in which the writer compares
herself to one of the three bears who has found Goldilocks eating all their porridge. The humour in this
is effective in conveying the writer’s sense of injustice and grumpiness at having her coffee used up by
her adult kids.

As a form of personal writing, my diary entry also focuses on thoughts and feelings related to coffee
drinking in the house. However, as I am writing from the perspective of one of the adult children and
not the mother, I am not frustrated by the same things.

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 My diary text is about what has happened that day – so I say ‘My mother was very annoying today’ – I
write in the past continuous tense to narrate recent events and use ‘today’ to make it even clearer that
I am commenting on recently past events. The diary entry is also dated at the start.

I use informal expressions like ‘the big deal’ and ‘I guess’ to evoke the voice of a younger adult. As
diaries are used for thinking things over, I have used sentences in the interrogative as well as
rhetorical questions such as ‘Maybe I should purchase another one?’ This helps to show that the diary
is recording my thoughts and feelings about the situation.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Answers to coursebook activities
4 Reading skills – text analysis
4.1 What is text analysis?
Activity 1
Skills that students may identify are highlighted below.

The overall tone of the text is mournful and elegiac – a man remembering the death of a loved one
some time ago. [1] The opening two sentences are short simple ones in the present tense [2] which
express the finality of death. [3] The first – ‘She’s gone’ – could be about any departure, but later in the
text the reader learns that the past tense ‘gone’ refers to her passing away. [3] Then, the text shifts in
time with the phrase ‘It was on a morning…’ [2] so that the reader begins to realise this is as much
about memory as anything else. [3]

[1] overview of text

[2] distinctive features related to language, grammar

[3] purpose and effect created.

Activity 2
1 The ‘jagged outcrop’ sounds bleak, as does the ‘cairn’ of stones (a memorial) and the mention of
her ‘memorial’ in a ‘cemetery’. However, the ‘blue stone wall’, ‘sun beating down’ and ‘palms …
breeze’ add life and warmth.

2 The writer uses metaphor (‘A row of trees was a line of camels climbing a hill’). There is also a
sense of pointed observations, like sudden camera flashes, in the way images are picked out
through repeated constructions such as ‘She’s gone. She won’t ever come back’ and ‘There was
a choir…’, ‘There was a tinkle….’, and later ‘There was a cairn...’, as well as ‘I was far from home’
and ‘that cairn was far from her grave’. It is as if points are being plotted on a visual graph of
memory.

3 The warm weather and physical details (the ‘blue stone wall’ and ‘palms’) contrast with the wintry
‘leafless’ trees and monochrome colours of the opening.

Activity 3
Students’ own responses – applying the five key points to a text of their choice.

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 4.2 Understanding and analysing the text
Activity 1
1 Further references to tourist locations: ‘Buckingham Palace’ and ‘Old Faithful’.

2 Further reference to visiting tourist sights being like attending a rock concert: ‘…your view is
obscured by a forest of outstretched arms, brandishing camera phones instead of cigarette
lighters’.

Activity 2
1 The idea of the camera phone is picked up from the first paragraph: ‘The camera phone has
become an unavoidable part of the travel experience, one that is both a blessing and a curse,
depending on who is wielding it.’

2 The same idea is mentioned in the sentence ‘You and I are sensible people who use our camera
phones …’.

3 In the final sentence, the focus switches to others ‘uploading endless images’ from their phones.

Students’ sentences should state that the article is broadly about the overuse of camera phones at
well-known tourist sites.

Activity 3
Overview 3 best sums up the overall focus of the article. As evidence for this, students might point to
the powerful nouns such as ‘blessing’, ‘curse’ and ‘selfie circus’, which suggest that the writer of the
article has a strong opinion. Also, camera phones are the main focus of the first two paragraphs, and
‘selfies’ are clearly linked to this.

Activity 4
Annotations that focus on specific features:

 vocabulary choices: 1, 2, 3

 features of form or structure: 4, 5.

Words or phrases that:

 suggest a particular mood: a range of vocabulary conveys the unease and tension aroused by
prospect of Raja’s visit (‘began to tremble’, ‘quivering voice’, and later ‘in a broken voice’)

 suggest certain qualities or ideas: the opening to the passage uses a range of phrases conveying
withdrawal, emptiness of closure (‘looked stark’, ‘put away’, ‘emptied of’, ‘rolled up’), which
suggest a form of hibernation; this evolves with a suggestion of a pilgrimage to a temple, with the
idea of the house being chosen, not them; there is also a quality of almost magical transformation
– the hibernating house is re-energised – but in a way that may be dangerous; Sarla’s feelings
are reduced to a simple ‘Raja has come…’, the house reacts physically with a ‘great shiver’ and is
seen through the metaphor of a ‘radiant serpent’

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  seem to echo others in the extract: the depiction of the house as a sentient being is continued in
the final sentence of paragraph 4 (‘Whether it liked it or not, the house became the one chosen by
Raja for a visitation, a house in waiting.’)

 seem to contrast with others in the extract: ‘blinding heat’ that ‘hammered’ contrasts with the
‘freshness and coolness’ of the mountains; structurally, the text ends with the emptying
mentioned at the start being reversed – things being opened (‘unlocking cupboards’) and spaces
being refilled (‘taking out sheets’)

 you can use for your introduction: look for words within the text that are relevant to the overall
mood or development – so the word ‘visitation’ would be useful in introducing the fact of Raja’s
visit, but also to imply the almost spiritual effect on Sarla and Ravi (e.g. ‘The text concerns a
house and couple who are to experience an unexpected ‘visitation’ – one which will disturb their
equilibrium and that of the house itself.’)

Activity 5

Word/phrase/featur Language or Specific effect Overall effect

e structural usage

‘In a quivering voice…’ Adverbial tells us more To convey her When added to the
about how Sarla asked apprehension about detail of her hands,
her question. what she might read. which ‘began to
tremble’, is that
whatever the postcard
contains it is likely to
have a profound
emotional effect.

‘…to decipher the words Imagery that tells us The effect is almost Overall, the idea also
as if they were a flight of something about how to suggest the words links with the migration
migrating birds in the Sarla is decoding the escape they would have made
distance.’ postcard. understanding – that from the house to the
what is stated plainly mountains, so it fits as a
does not necessarily natural metaphor.
convey all the
meaning.

Students create a similar table with their own features (these might be features they identified
in Activity 4).

1 Possible conclusions: the narrator’s tone is distant; she is an objective narrator who moves
between the general depiction of the house being shut up to the actions and reactions of Ravi and
Sarla to the postcard. The passage is very much of the moment – in the immediate action with no
switches in time or chronology. The paragraphs carefully deliver the shut-up house, then the
postcard and responses, then the reopening of the house.

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 2 The early part of the text is almost impersonal, mentioning ‘its owners’, and the closing down of the
house also closing down feeling and narrative action. This all changes when the postcard arrives,
inciting action and reaction.

Activity 6
C is the most accurate.

Activity 7
Students may note the following ideas:
1 The first paragraph evokes the setting and situation in the house, as the characters prepare to
‘escape’ the intense heat of summer. The summer season is named, as is its ‘withering’ and
‘blinding’ heat and its ‘engulfing dust’. A long list of preparations is described in quick succession
and this conveys a sense of restless activity.

2 The characters of Raja, Sarla and Ravi are all introduced. Raja is characterised by his use of a
postcard, which he ‘still used’ despite it being old-fashioned. Sarla has hands that ‘tremble’ and a
‘quivering voice’ as she reads the postcard, and she is clearly perturbed by Raja’s impending visit
(her face is described as ‘clenched in a tightly contained storm of emotion’). Ravi appears an
eager, physically energetic character, as his hands ‘crash’ against the table. Ravi also seems to
be capable of feeling uptight as he is described as waiting with ‘his lips thin and tight’ and with
expression of ‘helplessness’.

3 The writer sets a plot in motion by showing the characters preparing to leave for the summer – a
routine they have followed in the past. But then an unexpected event is introduced (the postcard
from Raja), and characters are shown reacting to this. Readers are left wondering how events will
unfold further.

4 Information is revealed by setting the scene with vivid, sensory description and by showing
characters’ reactions, such as how Sarla and Ravi react to the arrival of the postcard from Raja.
Yet readers do not know yet why the visit from Raja produces such excitement and anticipation for
the other characters. This information is withheld, making readers wonder what will happen when
Raja arrives.

Activity 8
Students’ own responses – writing a paragraph focusing on the convention of withholding information.

Activity 9
Example response:

The last two paragraphs of the extract focus on a metaphorical description of the effect that Raja’s
impending visit has, as well as the differing reactions of the characters Sarla and Ravi to this imminent
visit. The metaphorical description draws on snake-like and supernatural imagery. A ‘shiver’ and ‘wind’
like a ‘serpent’ is said to undulate through the ‘shadowy’ house, as if Raja’s visit is preceded by some
supernatural force. This idea of something ghostly approaching is continued via reference to a
‘visitation’ and ‘a house in waiting’ – personifying the house as anticipating the arrival of something
fearsome. This atmosphere is further emphasised as Sarla wraps up as if ‘cold’ and Ravi sits
‘uncomfortably’ in a ‘darkened drawing room’, his lips ‘thin and tight’ and feeling helpless.

The metaphorical description and the personification of the house create a tense, even fearful mood.
At first the reader’s view is directed to the overall scene of the house as a place waiting for the arrival

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 of something formidable, maybe even threatening – that is, Raja. Later, the reader’s view is directed
towards the responses of the characters Sarla and Ravi, as they each respond with apprehension
while they wait for Raja to arrive. Setting the scene first and creating a ghostly atmosphere allows the
writer to show how the characters are responding to the impending visit. The powerful effect of the
character Raja on the other characters is foregrounded, so the reader’s interest in Raja is piqued.
Readers may expect that he will live up to the impression created, but it’s also possible that he will turn
out to be different from the impression we have been given, and some readers may interpret the text in
this way.

4.3 Planning your response

Activity 1
One possible breakdown of the text might be:

 Section 3: ‘How have we as a nation…’ to ‘…as simple and vital as tea’.

 Section 4: ‘If every street corner...’ to ‘…piping hot, brewed and boiled’.

Activity 2
Associated words from the text:

 disgusting, ugly: ‘synthetic’; ‘lukewarm’; ‘spews out’; ‘bad’; ‘dirty’; ‘pathetic’; ‘soggy’; ‘waste water’

 (tea as a) life-force: ‘they can’t live without it’; ‘like blood or hormones or enzymes or whatever
fluid your body needs to function’; ‘simple and vital’

 stand up for (good tea): ‘how do we tolerate bad tea every day?’; ‘does your blood not boil when a
bad cup of tea is shoved in front of you?’; ‘We just need to demand it’; ‘We need to innovate here,
to ensure tea remains of a certain quality’; ‘we need machines which make tea like we like it.
Piping hot, brewed and boiled…’.

For the focus questions below Activity 2, students should identify the following:

 The switch between the pronoun ‘you’ and generic ‘Indians’ signifies both a direct conversation
with the reader – as if the narrator and reader are both part of the situation – and paradoxically
the voice of reason (or outrage) outside it.

 These words or phrases imply exasperation and shame, but the hyperbolic language (‘It creates
an existential crisis, making you question the entire purpose of living’ and ‘a pathetic teabag with
the thread that’s probably there to strangle yourself’) also adds a sense of humour, exaggerating
the crisis for dramatic effect.

 The text appears aimed at the middle-class professional, like the writer (‘You, the people who
work in modern offices or travel from airports’) and presents the argument as a cry for authenticity
in the face of faceless, tasteless middle-class brands and products. (‘If every street corner and
home can get it right, then our airports and offices can too.’) The street and home are presented
as models of good practice.

 The contexts shown include airports, modern offices, street, home and are related to the present
time. These are predominantly social/economic.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Activity 3
Example response:

Paragraph 1: Explain the general gist of the text, and writer’s overall viewpoint.

Paragraph 2: Analyse the lexical choices of the writer throughout the text, lexis will relate to tea and
tea-drinking but other lexis strongly contrasts, e.g. sink water, ugly thread, soggy paper cup. Comment
on the effects.

Paragraph 3: Analyse the semantics of the text, any connotations of words, any figurative or
metaphorical uses of language and their effects, especially central metaphors, e.g. tea as a ‘life force’
as well as other figurative uses of language (‘pathetic teabag’) – comment on how the uses of
figurative language link together semantically and create a broader meaning.

Paragraph 4: Analyse the grammar of the text – look at sentence structures, sentence form and
function, sentence length and variety, and any significant uses of tenses or pronouns or possessives.
Also, analyse the punctuation and the balance of coordination and subordination. Comment on the
effects.

Paragraph 5: Draw together all analytical points and comment on the overall meaning of the text and
reiterate how this is achieved via the language choices (and their effects) of the writer.

Activity 4
1 The new aspect of tone mentioned in the final sentence is the sense of mockery.

2 He/she refers to the phrase ‘so-called’ in ‘so-called high end places’ in order to support this
comment, (conveying the idea that the phrase ‘high end’ is a questionable title).

3 The interpretation made is that a place cannot be high-end (the response uses ‘sophisticated’) if it
does not serve good tea.

Activity 5
Example response, focusing on semantics:

The writer uses words and phrases with strongly contrasting meanings, and these contrasts support
the central idea in the text that good-quality tea is worth having while the inferior substitutes are
worthless. The writer values properly prepared tea and goes as far as claiming that tea of this kind is
the very ‘life force’ of Indian society. The idea of tea being a life force is developed into an extended
metaphor as other lexis, with further positive connotations of life-giving are used. Tea is thus
metaphorically compared to ‘blood’, ‘hormones’ and ‘enzymes’, fluids and chemicals in the body that
literally sustain life and without which we would die. The writer continues this idea by stating that tea
can be compared to ‘whatever fluid your body needs to function’, and tea is ‘vital’. In contrast, when
the writer describes the inferior versions of tea, such as those served on planes, these are ‘synthetic’.
‘Synthetic’ is an antonym of ‘genuine’ and has negative connotations of artificiality and being fake or
unreal. Even the milk that is served with this inferior tea is ‘coagulated’. This resonates strongly with
the meaning created earlier in the text when the writer compares tea to blood, coagulation being when
blood dries and does not flow in the body giving life. It is almost as if the inferior versions of tea can be
associated with death or harm, as this would be the situation when blood coagulates. Further lexis with
negative connotations reinforce this idea, teabags are ‘pathetic’, paper cups are ‘soggy’ and this kind
of tea epitomises ‘mediocrity’, which is contrasted ultimately with the ‘quality’ tea the writer prefers.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 4.4 Practice and self-assessment
Step 1

Key words in the task:

 ‘writer’s experience in Burma’

 ‘serving as a police officer at a time when the British ruled the country. He has been ordered to
deal with a possible threat posed by an elephant.’

 ‘analyse’

 ‘form, structure and language’.

What you have to do: ensure you comment on all three aspects – and, because this is ‘analysis’, do so
in focused detail. You are not being asked for a personal response, but you do need to be sensitive to
the underlying ideas that emerge through these aspects.

The six-step process

1 Brief notes on what happens:

The officer weighs up what he should and shouldn’t do as well as picturing possible outcomes.
Finally he shoots the elephant and describes its reactions, his own feelings and those of the
crowd.

2 Possible division of text into sections:

 S1: from ‘It was perfectly clear’… to ‘…further forward’ (end of paragraph 2).

 S2: from ‘When I pulled the trigger…’ to ‘I fired again into the same spot’.

 S3: from ‘At the second shot…’ to ‘…even where I lay’.

 S4: from ‘I got up...’ to the end of the passage.

(Or just divide according to the paragraphs.)

3 Students allocate time to each section.

4 Suggested words and phrases (others possible – any that fit the brief are acceptable):

S1:
 ‘If the elephant charged and I missed him, I should have about as much chance as a toad
under a steam-roller.’ Writer’s fear.

 ‘They were going to have their bit of fun after all.’ Expresses his different perspective on
things, and how the crowd have ‘got their way’, ‘Bit of fun’ is an informal idiom which is ironic,
given it is death for the elephant.

S2:
 ‘He looked suddenly stricken, shrunken, immensely old’

 ‘One could have imagined him thousands of years old.’

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 Both examples heighten the idea of the elephant’s provenance – as if he is an ancient mythic
beast, worthy of respect and not one whose life should be taken.

S3:
 ‘That was the shot that did for him.’ The anaphoric ‘That’ emphasises the finality of the action –
the writer’s understanding that the elephant will die.

 ‘He seemed to tower upward like a huge rock toppling, his trunk reaching skyward like a tree.’
The similes both connect the elephant to the earth, as if he is a fundamental part of nature
which is being uprooted.

S4:
 ‘He was dying, very slowly and in great agony, but in some world remote from me where not
even a bullet could damage him further.’ The phrase a ‘world remote from me’ suggests that
the elephant is emotionally and physically removed from the writer, experiencing pain and
suffering that is beyond the bounds of experience. Here the word ‘damage’ has double
meaning – physical and emotional.

 ‘In the end I could not stand it any longer and went away.’ This short, prosaic statement of fact
sums up the writer’s disgust in plain terms.

5 Students plan their response.

6 Students write their response.

Step 2

Students may note that the sample response offers a somewhat clear and structured response, but it
could be more perceptive and analytical. There is engagement with the content and ideas of the
extract, but this could be taken further with more analysis, and discussion of the effects of the writer’s
language choices. Some understanding of form, structure and language of text is shown but more
detail on lexis, semantics and grammar would enhance the response. Some language features are
identified and commented upon with examples quoted yet the response could analyse and quote
specific features more frequently and in more detail and relate these to the whole passage with
commentary on the holistic effects. Overall, the response shows some ability to explain language
choices and effects but to fully meet the success criteria, it needs to be more fluid and include more
analytical detail.

Step 3

Example response (underlined sections indicate improvements).

This text is about how the writer weighs up what he should do and a graphic description of how an
elephant is shot. It gives an explicit and moving account of the shooting itself, and explains it in a
highly sensitive and insightful way.
The opening paragraph shows how the narrator is indecisive by repeating the word ‘if’ to show what
might happen. The opening paragraph also shows the writer is deliberating what he should do. This is
most clearly evident in his repeated use of the modal verb ‘ought’ early on in the passage. The modal
verb ‘ought’, especially in the passage, communicates what the writer thinks he should do. Instead, as
he is a ‘poor shot’ and does not want to risk his life by getting closer he decides to shoot from further

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 away. This section of the passage tells us that he is going over things in his mind, and this creates
tension. But there is a clear contrast between what he ‘ought’ to do and what he will do. The first
paragraph ends with a strong simile which tells us about the writer’s fear – if the elephant charged: ‘I
should have about as much chance as a toad under a steam-roller.’ This suggests the size and power
of the elephant.

The next paragraph moves on so the reader follows how Orwell takes aim. The crowd are all watching
and Orwell says it is like ‘theatre’. He also talks about the crowd having ‘their bit of fun’. This tells us
that for them it is entertainment. But by lumping everyone together as ‘the people’ and ‘the crowd’ the
effect is one of contrast with him. He is also quite innocent as he does not know the proper way to
shoot an elephant.

The latter paragraphs of the passage contain graphic description of the elephant’s injuries and it slowly
dying. The writer creates enormous sympathy and pathos through his choice of words. After being
shot the elephant looks ‘stricken, shrunken and immensely old’. The idea of aging is continued as the
writer suggests we can imagine the elephant ‘thousands of years old’. These phrases vividly convey
both the literal and figurative impact of the bullet. In emphasising extreme age, the writer dramatises
how the elephant has moved suddenly from life towards near-death, all because of his act of shooting.
The tone of the passage becomes incredibly sad as the writer graphically describes the elephant’s
slow, agonising death. Lexis that emphasises physical agony and suffering are used to communicate
the reality of killing ‘a great beast’. The elephant’s chest is described as ‘painfully rising and falling’ and
its ‘rattling’ and ‘tortured breathing’ continues so long, and so painful it is to witness that he cannot
stand to look any more and leaves.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Answers to coursebook activities
5 Writing skills – shorter writing and
reflective commentary
5.1 What is shorter writing and reflective commentary?
Activity 1

Form/type of Whole text or Key focus or content Desired effect?

text part of it?

A Diary Whole Written by someone who Sense of the writer’s outlook

has moved to and mood
new/unfamiliar place

B Letter Whole For local paper and Sense of concern and

businesses, to reduce passion for the subject
plastic waste

C Descriptive Whole ‘Secret places’ – colours, Sense of atmosphere; help

sounds, movements reader imagine scene

Activity 2
Examples responses:

2 Write a letter to your local paper, encouraging local businesses to reduce plastic packaging. In your
writing, create a sense of concern and passion for the subject.

 Letter – must be written from my point of view. Needs to include conventions of a letter,
starting with explanatory opening paragraph, appropriate formal elements.

 Whole text – I need to get all my arguments into the letter succinctly, not leave anything
important out.

 Focus – I will need to think of some basic ideas for reducing plastic waster without patronising
the readers but also being firm and encouraging.

 Effect – I must include the feelings of someone who believes in reducing plastic waste,
whether I do or not! Must give good reasons why they should do so, and why I care so much.

3 You have been asked to contribute a descriptive piece to an anthology of writing about secret
places. In your writing, create a sense of atmosphere and focus on colours, sounds and
movements to help your reader imagine the scene. Write the text for the description, using no more
than 400 words.

 Description – doesn’t mention a narrator, and does not need to be in first person. Will need to
feature clear detail, and not tell a story.

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  Whole text – I need to cover a range of things in my description, not just sights, but as the task
says, sounds and movements too.

 Focus – I will need to think of particular elements to describe – e.g. a natural detail (the bark of
a tree, the dust on a windowsill).

 Effect – I must paint a vivid picture – show not tell! So, the reader must be able to see, hear
and almost touch the scene; I could use the full range of senses.

Activity 3
Yes, they have written a diary entry in an appropriate diary style, including using the present tense
then going back to what happened earlier.

The content is not quite right as the task states a ‘new and unfamiliar place’, and they write
‘we used to come here for holidays’.

They have included their viewpoint: ‘I feel like dancing on the roof’.

They have conveyed a sense of the old apartment – its noise, smell and dust – as well as the
excitement of the new place, through the use of exclamation marks, for example.

Activity 4
The commentary paragraph is effective in that the student refers to particular aspects of his own work
– use of the short present tense opening, for example, and his viewpoint. He has also supported his
points with three well-chosen examples.

5.2 Developing a shorter written response

Activity 1
If the task was to write a letter, the conventions would change in the following ways:

 The structure of a personal letter would include formal elements such as a salutation, address and
sign-off, for example. It would probably start with an introductory paragraph setting out the reason
or context for the letter.

 The style and language would also change. The voice would need to address the recipient, so
there might be reference to ‘you’, to shared knowledge (friendship, people, places). The level of
formality would need to match the relationship, so there might be some less formal usages such
as ‘contractions’ (‘you’ve’, ‘we’ve’), shorter, punchier sentences or questions (‘Remember that old
man who lived next door?’).

Activity 2
Students’ own responses – writing a sentence describing a pleasant view or smell. Sentences should
refer to an aspect of the new location in a pleasant way and make it clear this is a new place.

Activity 3
Students’ own responses – planning the structure of their diary entry.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Activity 4
Example response:

Boxes, boxes, boxes everywhere! I can hardly see my bed! I’ve had to make little alleyways between
rows of boxes so I can move around my new bedroom. It’s going to take me ages to unpack. But I love
this new area – when we drove down the street the sun was shining through the leaves on the trees …
there are so many trees on this street! It’s one of the things I love about it. I also love how close it is to
the park and the centre of town. I feel really lucky that Mum and Dad chose this place. I was unhappy
at the old place, especially my old school. Being bullied and not having any friends. I know I will have
to make friends here but I feel more hopeful … maybe because it’s a fresh start … still, in the old place
having all that time to myself meant I found peace in my beloved Harry Potter books. J. K. Rowling,
you don’t know what you did for me!

Activity 5
1 Form/type of text Whole text or part Key focus or Desired effect?
of it? content

1 Article for school Whole Encouraging Sense of enthusiasm

magazine fellow students to and hope
make contact
with people their
own age in other
countries

2 Article for travel website: Whole Suggesting Useful guidance, but

transactional holiday for young upbeat and engaging
people

3 Narrative (story) Opening Mysterious Sense of drama and

happenings or mystery; reader
events immediately engaged in
story/character

Conventions:

 Magazine article: title, opening paragraph explaining context/focus, key facts (if relevant);
body text developing ideas; final paragraph rounding off, perhaps linking back to start; direct
address to students (‘you’); possible use of present tense (‘It is clear…’) and modals to
express obligation (‘We/you should…’).

 Travel website article: will follow most of the same conventions as for the magazine article,
but the voice should be adapted to encompass a wider, more general audience, so less direct
address; style more balanced and advisory in tone (‘You might …’); more likely to contain
factual information about specific places, travel.

 Narrative: text driven by events and characterisation; clear use of connectives to convey time
shifts or surprises, shocks, Withholding information for mystery; range of sentence types to

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 build tension; use of punctuation for effect. Use of direct speech to advance plot or character.
Descriptive detail interwoven into action to create atmosphere.

Students’ own responses, outlining their decisions on the detail and mood to use for each
response.

Activity 6
Narrative task – example response:

It was half past midnight when I heard the knock at the street door. The wind and rain outside my
window had kept me awake otherwise I would never have heard whoever it was. I eased myself out of
bed and felt the chill of the floorboards against the soles of my feet. As I stepped towards my bedroom
door I reached for the light switch and flicked it. Nothing. The bulb must be out. I looked into the
darkness outside my room and could make out the hallway and the top of the staircase. There was a
light for the stairs a few steps away.

Whoever was outside banged against the door – this wasn’t a polite or even a firm knock but a frantic,
hectic thumping against the wood. Something was wrong. No one banged against a door like that in
the middle of the night unless there was something deeply wrong.

I flicked on the stair light and felt dazzled at the harsh brightness. As I stepped carefully down the
stairs
I could see the silhouette through the stained-glass panels of the street door. It was a large figure,
the outline of some burly man. It looked like a grizzly bear was waiting for me outside my house.

Bang. Bang. Bang. The force of these last three knocks took me aback. The door shook in its frame.
I thought it might fall in and crash against the floor. The visitor outside would have seen the stair light
come on so it was too late to pretend I wasn’t at home.

‘Who is it?’ I called whilst halfway down the stairs.

‘Open up!’ they shouted.

I carried on down the stairs and approached the door. The shadow now faced me.

‘What do you want?’ I asked.

‘I must speak with you,’ it said, ‘I have a message about your child.’

I swallowed and hurriedly started undoing the bolt, chain and lock. I could hear the rain pelting against
the man’s hat and coat, and against the stone steps. It sounded like whipping or beating.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 5.3 Writing a reflective commentary
Activity 1
 Other examples of sound, colour or movement: ‘black trees with bare, perhaps dead, branches’;
‘As the wind increases, it begins to whistle through the barren trees’.

 Other descriptions emphasising the secrecy: absolute stillness; as if you are the first living being to
observe them.

 Particular ways the atmosphere is created: like a pearl necklace, sends a shudder through the
watcher’; ‘a high-pitched song of solitude’; ‘…a brittle orchestra, the holes and ridges of the ashy
bark playing an ever-changing tune’.

 Any examples of when the writer ‘focuses’ in on something in particular: ‘thin lizards with long, pink
tongues dart up and down the hollow trunk’; ‘the holes and ridges of the ashy bark’.

Activity 2
How the student has ‘helped the reader imagine the scene’: ‘I immediately set the scene for a
“secret” location by using the phrase “have to follow a winding, gritty path”, which leads the reader
to the lake itself.’; ‘by including the phrase “you can stand looking down” I made the reader see the
lake from a distance’.

Comments on the mood or atmosphere created: ‘which adds to the idea of it being hidden’.

Evaluation of how well sounds, colour and movement have been evoked: ‘I tried to evoke the
colours of the scene by including noun phrases like ‘emerald water’ and ‘tiny, white flowers’; ‘I also
tried to convey the movements through reference to the “nodding heads” of the flowers and the
verb “flutter”, which emphasises the way their petals shake.’

Activity 3
The student has used the first approach, working through the text in stages, one paragraph at a time.

Activity 4
 I conveyed movement through the image of the ‘black, thin lizards’ and the verb ‘dart’, which
conveyed how they moved quickly ‘up and down the hollow trunk’.

 I tried to show how distant and isolated the scene was by suggesting the lizards had ‘come from
some ancient time’. I conveyed the same idea by saying it was as if the narrator was the ‘first living
being to observe them’.

 I also conveyed the sounds of the place by describing the way the wind would ‘whistle through the
barren trees’ and create a ‘high-pitched song of solitude’.

Activity 5
Students’ own responses – completing the student commentary. They should only refer to examples
from the original secret places text, not cover the ones already commented on.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Activity 6
Example response:

I opened the door and saw a huge concrete staircase descending into the darkness. The steps went
down so far they disappeared into black, as if I might walk down and if the steps didn’t continue I
would fall off into empty space and fall forever. But I couldn’t resist. I wanted to see what was at the
bottom. The air was cold and a slight breeze blew up the staircase and caressed my face. There was
a smell of freshly cut grass which seemed strange as I was inside the building. I started to walk down
but left the door open behind me. Further and further down I went, and as I did my eyes adjusted to
the low light and it was as if more steps emerged before me. Suddenly I heard a click and when I
looked back up the stairs the door at the top had closed. But I decided to go on.

I must have been walking for ten or fifteen minutes. The muscles in my legs were aching a little and I
felt a bit unsteady. There was a metal handrail on my right-hand side but on the left was a sheer drop.
More blackness. I gripped the handrail tighter and kept descending.

After another five minutes or so I started to hear chirping. At first I thought I was imagining it. But as I
got closer to whatever it was the sounds became louder and more distinct. It was definitely birds. I
could now see some brightness below and the ceilings changed from smooth wall to rock. The stairs
curved round to the left and levelled out into a gravel path and I could see I had entered a cavern. I
went in further and it grew wider and wider and the light brighter and brighter until finally I was in an
open space underground. There were trees and birds singing. The gravel path had changed to grass
and somehow there was light coming from even deeper in the cavern. The grass bank I walked on
grew wider and wider and then I found myself at the beachy shore of an enormous lake. Little waves
lapped near my feet, wetting my shoes. Without thinking I took my shoes and socks off and a paddled
in my bare feet. The water was warm and tingly.

Commentary

As the brief calls for atmosphere and a focus on colours, sounds and movements I included
descriptive detail that draws on the senses. I included description on what the narrator is seeing, the
noises he hears, and the fragrances he smells. This descriptive detail was included so that the reader
can more easily imagine the scene being described, and also imagine how it might feel if they were
actually experiencing what is being described.

As the task was about ‘secret’ places, I tried to create a sense of mystery and discovery. I did this by
choosing an unusual setting – a lake which is inside a building rather than out in nature. I also tried to
generate a feeling of discovery by having the reader find things out at the same rate as the narrator.
The description reveals things slowly and from the way it is described, it is clear the narrator doesn’t
know what he will find, so the reader experiences the same feeling of discovery.

I tried to vary the length of my sentences so there was not a monotonous rhythm in reading, and I also
tried to use short sentences every now and again for a dramatic effect, such as ‘But I couldn’t resist’,
‘More blackness’ and ‘But I decided to go on’. Overall I used coordination rather than subordination in
my sentences. I chose this approach as I wanted the prose to resemble speech and as coordination is
more common in speech I thought this might work well. Using the coordinating conjunction ‘but’ also
allowed me to create tension and contrast between the potential threat implicit in venturing into the
unknown and the curiosity and desire to explore and find out what is at the bottom of the staircase.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 Unit 5.4: Practice and self-assessment
Responding to a narrative-style question

Step 1: Decoding the task

The form is a story/narrative.

You have to write part of the text – the opening.

The text is about a ‘life-changing experience’.

The effects they need to create relate to explaining why or how it is a ‘challenging situation’, which
could be due to characters, events or a setting (or all of these).

Step 2: Check the conventions

Students should recognise that they need a sense of the overall structure, so even if this is just the
opening it should still introduce a problem or challenge for the main character. There needs to be
strong initial characterisation, and the opening should engage the reader’s attention. There might be
direct speech or the introduction of other characters. Any setting needs to be drawn vividly but
interweaved into the story or description of the challenging experience.

Step 3: Generate ideas and create a plan

Students come up with their own ideas and plan their responses.

Step 4: Get writing!

Students draft their responses to the task.

Step 5: Rewriting a response

The response meets the ‘competent’ criteria. The example response below is an attempt to improve
through rewriting.

As if in a heap of rubbish I found a precious diamond … I’d read that somewhere. I can’t remember
where. That was my shop. My new venture. A precious diamond. The heap of rubbish was the area
where I was forced to rent my premises. To say that it was in the less fashionable part of town would
be an understatement. Slum area might be going a bit far. But that was closer. On the street outside
the shop was a car with no windows and missing tyres. It was held up by bricks where the wheels once
were. As I opened the door on the first morning I saw a stray, mangy dog urinating against a lampost
immediately in front of me. It was not the most auspicious beginning. Yet somehow none of this
seemed to matter. They say it is darkest just before the dawn and, despite the seemingly unpromising
setting for my new business, I just felt this adventure was going to change my life. For the better.

I was up early to open the shop on its first day. I pulled up the roller shutters and turned the sign
around inside the door so it read ‘Open!’ This was all before seeing that disgusting dog. But despite
that my enthusiasm was undimmed. Eagerly, I walked up and down the aisles looking over the neatly
stacked groceries I had carefully laid out the day before. I’d had to learn a lot about retail in the last
two years, but I was confident I understood the basics. This business was going to be my ticket to

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 financial independence. Even if the work was hard, I would finally be my own boss and that thought
just made me feel free.

Suddenly, the electronic door chime went off. My first customer! In walked a young woman with a
pushchair. The child was nosily sucking a straw in a juice carton. I smiled. The young woman parked
the pushchair near the newspaper and magazines and wandered up and down the aisles. I was about
to say, ‘Can I help you?’ when she came right up close to my shiny, new counter and asked, ‘Have
you got lighter fuel?’

Responding to a transactional/descriptive style response

Step 1: Decoding the task

The form is a website article and the purpose is to promote green issues.

You have to write the whole text.

The text is about traffic in rush hour, focusing on sounds and movements.

You need to create a sense of atmosphere, helping the reader imagine the scene.

Step 2: Check the conventions

This is an article, so students should consider that the opening paragraph might establish the ‘what’,
‘who’, ‘where’ and ‘why’, differentiating it from a straight description. It might also feature personal
viewpoint (‘As I watch/watched…’). It is also a descriptive piece, so it must contain detailed
vocabulary, close-up focus, clear sound and movement expressed through well-chosen verbs, and
prepositions of place, perhaps. Paragraphs should deal with specific areas and end with a concluding
paragraph in a more obviously ‘article’ style, perhaps with a circular reference to the opening.

Step 3: Generate ideas and create a plan

Students come up with their own ideas and plan their responses.

Step 4: Get writing!

Students draft their responses to the task.

Step 5: Rewriting a response

Students rewrite their response to improve it.

Evaluating a commentary on the narrative response

Example response:
Although the reflective commentary makes some relevant points and directly refers to the text, the
analysis is light and lacking in detail. In terms of the criteria, there is a lack of sophistication and detail
in analysing form, structure and language. Greater focus on specific lexis, semantics and grammar,
and the effects of language use on the reader, would improve the commentary.

Evaluating a commentary on the descriptive response

Example response:
The reflective commentary offers a clear description of the text with some attention to form, structure
and language. The commentary is readable and makes an attempt to account for how language
choice might affect the reader. A more detailed focus on the lexical choices of the writer would

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 improve the sophistication of the analysis in the commentary. Furthermore, explanation of the
semantic and grammatical patterns in the text, and the likely effects of these patterns, would enhance
the commentary.

Answers to coursebook activities

Writing skills – extended writing
6.1 What is extended writing?
Activity 1
Students’ own responses – a choice of one of the four questions.

Students’ own responses – reasons for their choice of question.

Activity 2
1 Form: a magazine review.

2 Theme/focus: a new healthy food café for young people in your area.

3 Purpose: to review the café, saying what its strengths and weaknesses are in order to
recommend it (or not).

4 Audience: other students.

Activity 3
The plan lacks detail and omits several areas that could have been commented on.

The student would find it difficult to write an ‘extended’ review as they have only planned for
comments on a small range of areas. For example, ‘food’ is too general. Even in the ‘ideas’ stage,
some items might have been mentioned (‘halloumi salad’) or sub-categories of food (‘salads’, or
‘first course, main course’, or ‘snacks’, ‘full meal’ for example).

As well as more specific details, other areas that could have been mentioned include:

 name, location of café, time of day visited

 appearance of building inside and out

 what was actually ordered

 service – waiting time, helpfulness of staff

 the bill – good or bad value?

 whether the student would recommend the café.

Activity 4
There are several things that could be added, including the information specified in 2 and 3. The
healthy aspect of the café could be addressed by mentioning things such as gluten-free or low-

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 calories, low-fat options, and perhaps the size of the portions. Given that this is a new café, the review
might mention the new owner and his or her background, when it was opened, for example.

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 6.2 Developing an imaginative or descriptive response
Activity 1
Students’ own responses – writing a description of a simple action. Their writing should include at least
three of the techniques mentioned in the list of key skills/techniques. Ensure that responses do not slip
into broad narrative writing.

Activity 2
Students’ own responses – creating spider diagrams to add details to an idea. An example for ‘shower’
might be:

Activity 3
Students’ own responses – coming up with ideas for their description, then planning and drafting it.

Activity 4
Students’ own responses – creating a spider diagram for ‘The Letter’ task.

Activity 5
Students’ own responses – creating an arc for their story.

Activity 6
Students’ own responses – deciding on narrative viewpoint and type of narrator.

Activity 7
Students’ own responses – deciding on the form of narrative.

Activity 8
Students’ own responses – continuing the dialogue. Ensure that the development of the dialogue:

 advances the story (does it tell us more about the situation?)

 advances the character (do we find out more about the speakers?)

 continues the mood or atmosphere – the pressure of the interrogation.

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 Activity 9
Example responses:

Type of opening Prompt

Atmosphere or tone Ahead of me, a figure stood in the shadows, his

face pale in the lamplight. His hat was pulled
down over most of his face but he had a mean,
ugly mouth which was twisted in a sort of
sneering smile.

It was three o’clock in the morning when she

noticed that the moon had created a perfect
round face on the wall. She went to the window,
and stared out. It hung in the air like a glittering
jewel.

Funny, surprising or shocking It was on a Sunday morning that I woke up and

discovered that I was the size of a toy soldier …

Particular memory or occasion It all began when I was given my grandmother’s

necklace on the day of her funeral. My mother
opened my palm and pressed a velvet pouch
into it.

Ten years ago to this day, I was working in a

crowded kitchen on a cruise ship alongside my
twin brother Chen.

General statement or metaphor Funerals are long drawn-out movies that no one
wants to watch but where all the doors are
locked.

Everybody knows that weddings are a bore …

Withholding information He picked it up and turned it over in his hand.

The smooth handle was made of some sort of
pearl. There was some sort of lettering etched
into it in a language he couldn’t read.

In media res I held on for dear life as the shark circled the
little inflatable. I could hear the air slowly
escaping and I knew I only had minutes left.

Activity 10
This is an effective story opening. It establishes the idea of danger as it is perceived by the narrator.
By placing us, as readers, with him – and the ‘young men’ at a distance – we experience his fear. The
author withholds information about who the narrator is and why the young men represent danger,
which adds to the tension. Techniques include the following:

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  In a sense, this passage begins in medias res – he is right in the heart of the action, facing the
coming danger.

 The extended metaphor of the bus – ‘an island of safety in a sea of perils’ adds to the feeling of
danger, that it, like the sea, is all around him and he might drown in it.

 The use of the past continuous tense, with ‘was pounding’ and ‘was crying out’, gives the feeling
of a continuing nightmare that will only be ended or resolved when he faces the inevitable.

Activity 11
Examples responses:

Task A – The Shopping Centre

It had been raining and so the pavement outside the shopping centre contained shimmery reflections
of passers-by, like upside ghosts stuck to the soles of people’s feet. Peter Pan once had to sew his
shadow back on to himself, but modern shoppers were probably oblivious to the shadowy companions
that traipsed underneath them.

Inside the precinct, bright fluorescent lights, cream floor tiles and white ceiling paint gave the space a
sterile, hospital-like look, which is perhaps the intention of the decoration? To induce a soporific,
trance-like state where you will wander about and spend more money mindlessly accumulating more
unwanted, unneeded possessions. People moved about smoothly on escalators, as they stepped on
the motion in their own bodies stopped as they allowed the conveyor belt to take over and glide them
up or down to the next level where they woke up again, stepped off and continued the dreamy pursuit
of the next item they had in mind. Or maybe they were just browsing, hoping it would present itself
seductively, tantalisingly – the way adverts seem to catch our eye and massage that desire for new
shoes, new trainers, new phones, new cars, new lipsticks, new you.

The shopping centre had three levels and a series of balconies and thoroughfares designed to make
flowing transitions through the physical space, moving along would feel effortless, yet to get up or down
one had to traverse a long corridor with shops on either side, their shopfronts drawing your eye … their
doorways always open, always warm and inviting … perhaps your kind of music emanating from within.
Come, come inside and have a look. Wander around and touch the folded jumpers on the square, white
display table. Riffle through the hanging racks of designer jeans dangling for your attention. Young,
attractive shop assistants mill about ready to serve you.

You can spend a morning, an afternoon, or even a whole day here wandering in and out of all the
shops. If you buy a lot your new goods are presented to you in big, colourful bags with long, silky plastic
handles so they can be hooked along your forearm and will just add to that feeling of accomplishment
as you ramble on to the next shop along or take another ride on the escalator to explore another level.
If you get thirsty or hungry there are places you can go to deal with that too. Cafés offer bright green or
red slushy drinks in giant transparent cups with domed lids and straws so you can slurp as you walk
along, if you don’t want to sit and stare while seated on one of the few tiny, rounded benches in the
middle of the passing throng. If you like eat while you walk, you can feast on oversized American
cookies. Some have chocolate chips like nuggets; others have white chocolate or raisins, or fudge like
dice loaded into them. There must be a type of cookie you prefer, a type of cookie that expresses the
kind of person you are, a type of cookie marketed at all the other people who are unique enough to
prefer salted rather than plain caramel. You’ve worked hard all week and deserve this – go ahead and
buy it! The large oval cookie comes in its own special red-and-white striped paper bag; you can use the

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 bag to hold the cookie to prevent sticky fingers. See the other people doing the same, walking along
with the edge of their cookie peeking out as they nibble away, gliding along the smooth floor.

On the upper level, for those with more serious appetites, there are the fast-food joints, selling burgers
and fries, and fried chicken, and burritos, and falafel wraps. Here, long queues form between noon
and 2 p.m. when everybody’s stomach alarms go off and the hunger pangs start, driving them to the
nearest outlet. Don’t you know it is dangerous to be hungry? You must feed that impulse and now you
are in the perfect place. Red and yellow plastic trays stacked at the end of a long silver shelf; take one
and slide it along, taking what you need from inside the Perspex cases. Or, if you prefer, wait in line
until you get to the counter with the backlit menu board above cashiers’ heads. Sumptuously
photographed beef burgers, glisten between perfectly rounded bread baps, scattered with tiny sesame
seeds like freckles on a pretty girl. Golden fries stand to attention in crisp red boxes, begging for your
touch. Think how they will fold as your place them in your mouth…

All your needs are served here. Isn’t this the place of your dreams?

Task B – Continue the story opening

The open road stretched ahead of them. There was only one way they could go – the way that led to
the next bunker. After the virus had struck and spread all over the country, the military-scientific unit
they were part of had released the codes to the survival bunkers that had been installed in preparation
for the war. Yet this war was different from those that had come before. This war was against our own
people and now we – that is, the military – were at just as much risk as the millions of people we had
infected a year ago. They were all dead now, slaughtered by the still-airborne virus. On any day when
the temperature was over 25 degrees Celsius, its unique genetic code would activate, and if it wasn’t
for the specially designed gas masks we were wearing we would die, in pain, within minutes. At least
in the bunkers there would be more food and a power supply so that we could recharge the radio and
see if there were any other survivors in our unit. Only by finding them could we try to get the antidote
released and decontaminate the air.

It was eerie to see the highway stretch so far to the horizon. In the distance were some abandoned
cars. No doubt with corpses inside. They would be in a frightening state after all this time. Insects
would be a problem too. But it would be best to just get past these sights as quickly as possible. The
sun was high in the sky, glaring down. Even though the situation was bleak there was still something
tranquil about the clean white clouds drifting against a clear blue sky. If you looked up a lot you could
sometimes forget for a few moments about the ugliness below. Once we got nearer to the abandoned
cars I could see crows circling and landing on the rooftops. Soon we were walking right next to the
cars. The doors were open and there was the buzzing of insects coming from inside. I chose not to
look. I’d seen enough of that sort of thing for a while and I was happy when the cars were behind us
and the open road stretched ahead of us again.

Later in the afternoon the sky turned grey and although this meant rain I was pleased, as it reduced
the chances of a temperature spike and made us feel safer. But it was July, and the temperature
ranged widely from day to day. We were getting tired and started dragging our feet. Every now and
then our boots scraped against that black road and the harsh sound somehow made us feel even
more worn down. My partner stopped and kneeled down to retie one of his bootlaces. While he did so
I put down for a few moments the heavy backpack that carried all our water and other supplies. It was
a relief to be free of that burden for a few minutes.

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 Around dusk we sighted the bunker. The purple flag fluttering in the breeze made it easy to spot and
lifted our spirits – this was the sign that the bunker was inhabited. We could stock up on some human
company as well as food and electricity. In the world we now lived, companionship was as precious as
food, or at least it seemed so to me. Perhaps our colleagues in the bunker there had made some
progress on deciphering the codes that would release the antidote. It seemed the height of political
and military folly that the people who knew how to repopulate the world had been taken out by their
own weapon. Humanity was now on the brink. Only the antidote could bring us back.

6.3 Developing a discursive response

Activity 1
1 Text A addresses both sides of the issue – signalled by the use of ‘However’, which introduces the
alternative view. There is also no use of the first person.

2 Text B offers a more personal point of view. The use of the first person and the questions suggest a
more direct contact with the reader.

Activity 2
Example responses:

Are animal rights as important as human rights? (General introduction which sets out the views as a
series of statements)

Before we can answer the question of whether animal rights are as important as human rights, we
could first try to define what we mean when we talk of ‘rights’. We can define what we feel are
essential human rights and then move on to consider whether these things apply equally to animals.
Some basic rights to include would be the right to life and the right to be free of torture. Although some
people in some parts of the world may not have these rights in their entirety, many others do.
Moreover, it would be difficult to find a reasonable person who would argue that human beings should
not have these two basic rights. The same conditions are clearly not in place for animals as many are
killed for food and many are also used in the pharmaceutical and cosmetics industries to test products
meant for humans. Although, strictly speaking, these activities are not ‘torture’, it is possible to argue
that humans subjected to the same tests might feel they are being tortured.

Should people be allowed to carry guns? (Introduce the topic using questions that represent the
opposing views)

Should a citizen be allowed to carry a lethal weapon so that they can defend their own life and their
property? Or, by allowing gun ownership, do we make our societies unnecessarily violent and
dangerous? Put another way – is it right that a law-abiding citizen can have their life taken away by a
criminal who carries a gun? Don’t citizens have the right to defend their own lives? Or, is it the very
practice of gun ownership itself that fuels an escalating tide of deaths? Is it simply an illusion that more
guns means more safety, and that the sooner we switch this around the better?

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 Activity 3
The example paragraph uses the third approach – including counter arguments with a paragraph. The
first two sentences argue one view, but after the connective ‘However’ the counter argument is
introduced.

Activity 4
The order students choose for these points may vary, but is likely to broadly follow the order below.

Introduction/opening paragraph: This should offer a broad introduction, so a discussion around the role
of the teacher would probably go here:

 what should be the role of the teacher (to focus solely on results? To nurture students?)

 how to measure a teacher’s impact on learning/results?

Middle paragraphs:

 importance of exam results in a student’s development (compared to other skills or experiences

gained in class/school)

 factors that determine whether a student will get a good or bad exam result

 who is most responsible for ‘good’ results? (the teacher, parent, or student – or other factors?)

 what responsibilities do students have for their own learning?

Conclusion:

 whether the general idea is a sound one.

Activity 5
Students’ own responses – rewriting the student response. Ensure that their answers:

 remove the informality (‘Well, I reckon’, and so on)

 separate out the ideas – in the example, the role of the teacher flows into the issue of students
daydreaming and texting

 add evidence to the idea of teachers being the right people to deliver learning. For example, they
could say ‘Teachers have years of training, and have dealt with a range of different students of
varying abilities’.

Activity 6
The first is a more direct approach, built around the ‘fairytale’ concept, which is returned to in the final
sentence. The concluding questions are perhaps too numerous and may swamp the reader with too
many ideas. They are, however, provocative and thus effective. Both sides of the argument are
touched on, but it is difficult to ascertain the writer’s views. The ideas are expressed rather abstractly.

The second approach is more reflective and studied. It offers a specific view, though one modified by
phrases such as ‘to a degree’ and ‘they believe’, which detach the writer from the opinions
themselves. The use of evidence (the ‘recent survey’) lends the text a sense of authority.

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 Activity 7
Students’ own responses – writing the first body paragraph to follow on from the student response.
Ensure their first paragraphs include all the features listed in the bullet points.

Activity 8
1 The reference to ‘self-image’ links back to the statement in the second response: ‘image, they
believe, is important in the world around us nowadays’. The reference to ‘Those who lose out in
such competitions may lose self-esteem and motivation, developing feelings if inferiority in
relation to those around them’ links back to ‘Beauty contests, it revealed, gave girls aspiration,
hope and motivation’.

2 Examples of measure language include ‘it seems that’, ‘it is said’, ‘may lose’, ‘may well be’.

3 The text is cyclical in its references to the mirror. ‘The mirror on the wall may reflect the kinds of
negative things we don’t really want to see’ links back to the ‘Mirror, mirror’ quotation at the start.

4 It engages the reader through inclusive language: ‘As we have seen…’, ‘We should be…’

5 Powerful abstract ideas include ‘all kinds of beauty: physical and spiritual’ and ‘Beauty … in the
eye of the beholder’.

6 The final viewpoint can be seen in the statement, ‘We should be very, very careful: the mirror on
the wall may reflect the kinds of negative things we don’t really want to see.’ This suggests if we
look too closely at the outer image, then we begin to doubt our worth.

Activity 9
Example response:

We all want to look good don’t we? We all want to look our best. Many of us make a point of eating
well and drinking lots of water to try to improve our health and keep our bodies and skin looking fresh
and young. Time spent in the gym, at exercise classes or the pool, or running on the streets, all aimed
at trying to make – or keep – our appearance as attractive as possible. So, with all these efforts we
make is it any wonder that another step we consider is a little nip and tuck? Maybe we would like our
lips to be a bit fuller? Or maybe we want that ‘perfect’ nose. Who would object to whiter teeth?

There are some who feel that cosmetic surgery is just like buying fashionable clothes – it is simply
another accessory designed to enhance your appearance. Yes, it’s surgery, but we buy designer
glasses if we need them, and we routinely have our teeth checked and cleaned, so what’s wrong with
getting rid of bags under the eyes or stained teeth with the help of a medical professional? Often
people with a lack of self-confidence, whose mental health is damaged by worry over some bodily
imperfection, will find a new lease of life and happiness in simple cosmetic procedures that improve
their look.

Yet others disagree. Other voices argue that cosmetic surgery fuels both societal and personal
obsession with physical appearance, and believe that this is unhealthy and undesirable. We’ve all seen
the pictures of cosmetic surgery gone wrong and the misery that this can cause. How much better would
it have been if the person had seen how unnecessary that suffering was? Cosmetic surgery is
expensive, unsafe, and worst of all totally pointless. We will all grow old and in doing so our appearance
will inevitably change – and yes, we will not look as we did in our youth, the time when we may think we
looked our best. Surely we should teach our children – and ourselves – that our worth comes from

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 things other than our fleeting youthful looks. Our confidence would then be based on something more
stable and solid – emotional and psychological well-being for example – than a wrinkle-free,
inexpressive, botoxed forehead. There is something weird and dead about a face that is made young by
surgery. It never looks as good as the real thing. Yet those who age well seem to have an acceptance
and grace in their poise, demeanour and appearance. We should aspire to be more like them and less
like the plastic-looking people who are too quick to go under the cosmetic surgeon’s knife.

In the end, it’s personal choice of course. It’s your money and your body and you can do what you
want with it. If you think you look better with a straighter nose or fatter lips, be my guest. But I for one
say beauty is only skin deep. The poets have known this through the ages – youth and beauty fade.
Better to appreciate it while it lasts and then move on freely than try to cause yourself pain by trying to
keep hold of something that will always be slipping through your fingers. Spend all that time, money
and effort on your inner beauty and then you will truly feel attractive. What’s more, this inner beauty
will stand the test of time better than all the eye tucks and nose jobs that money can buy.

6.4 Developing a critical response or review

Activity 1
An example spider diagram might be:

Activity 2
1 The opening paragraph provides most, but not all, the key facts.

2 It could include the length of the programme and perhaps the names of the presenters (although
the latter could come in a later paragraph).

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 3 Example additional sentences: Make no mistake this was one to watch. And I’ll tell you another
thing: same time next week I’ll be on my sofa, phone off, and remote control in hand for the next
instalment of Music Now!

Activity 3
Example response:

So, the show opens/begins/starts [1] with Theo Young, co-presenter, who is incredibly excitable and
seems to spend most of it leaping around the stage like a man crossing hot coals/hyperactive two-year
old/ restless gibbon. [2] I found this very irritating/annoying/refreshing. [3]. When he introduces each
act, I ask myself who is meant to the star here/whether he will ever stand still? [4]

Activity 4
The dreadful cacophony of sound made by these so-called musicians is a disgrace. And to think this
show replaced the well-loved ‘Historical monuments’ series!  Magazine for retired people

Wow! It’s amazing to see my fave band live on tv for once! Ok, so it’s a short show and they only get
to play one number, but hey – it’s better than nothing!  Fan magazine for a pop group

While it might not be everyone’s cup of tea, the show provides a bit of variety from the usual cop
dramas and game shows we’re offered most Fridays.  TV listings magazine for general readership

It’s great to see that you music lovers can tweet your views about the performances while you watch
the show.  Online music website

Activity 5
Example response:

Music Now! aired for the first time last night at 7pm on Muzik Channel 4. It is a programme consisting
of live performances from some of today’s top artists and is intended to capture the notoriously
difficult-to-reach teen and young adult audience. Make no mistake this was one to watch. And I’ll tell
you another thing: same time next week I’ll be on my sofa, phone off, and remote control in hand for
the next instalment of Music Now!

What makes it so unmissable? First, the quality and number of live performances in a show like this
has to be appreciated. Only at a live gig will you get a musical treat as good as this. Guys, this is
Glastonbury beamed directly into your living room – or to your phone if that’s your thing. Just consider
this line up: Calvin Harris & Dua Lipa, Drake, Ariana Grande, Lil Dicky, Chris Brown, Banx & Ranx,
Ella Eyre, Yxng Bane. The list goes on. I don’t know how Muzik Channel 4 pulled this off but I don’t
care. I loved it!

Then there’s Jonny Trooper and Alice Evans, the charismatic presenters. The chemistry between
them is … what’s better than electric? Nuclear! Yes that’s them, that’s the show. A fusion of great
music, great guests and great production. Any fission? Yeah, when the commercial breaks came. But
that’s when I made the tea. Seriously, Jonny and Alice are a great combo. They have serious music
knowledge as you’ll see in their history bit. More on that later. But they also are funny and both of them
look great if you like that sort of thing.

This might have been enough to earn my five stars, but the interviews with the musicians and the
behind-the-scenes pieces were fantastic. And just when you thought you were full up from the musical
feast out comes the pudding: the music bug. What’s that? Yes, the music bug, the show’s closing

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 segment that looks at a bit of rock and pop history. And this is not lightweight fluff, but an informative
and insightful doco-examination of a band’s or artist’s genius, complete with archive footage of their
‘best bits’ and brilliantly authoritative assessment and commentary from Jonny and Alice. I don’t know
if it’s them or their researchers, but whoever it is should be congratulated on their homework. Gold star
from me!

I tell you I was so happy afterwards I switched the telly off and started compiling new playlists inspired
by the show. Three hours and 50 songs later I was still dancing in my living room. I even dreamt about
music, the show’s yellow submarine cartoon and lyrics having left a lasting impression. My partner
says I’ve been humming, tapping my feet, and just generally being a more upbeat and better person to
be around since getting into the show. Yes, it’s that good, Watch it! That’s an order!

So remember the following: next week 7pm Muzik Channel 4, Music Now! Be there ready or set your
recorders now. I’ve told you what to expect so you’d be mad to miss all that great live music and the
delight of Jonny and Alice. You’ll learn something fascinating about music history which will make you
even more of an aficionado than you already are. Those pub quizzes will be a breeze after a few more
shows. Marriage and relationship counsellors are going to have a lot of free time on their hands once
this show gets the audience it deserves. People will stop going out. We’ll all be at home, happy and
dancing and being all round better people. Thanks to Music Now!

6.5 Practice and self-assessment

Activity 1
Write a story called The Prisoner in which a narrator describes his or her experiences of being captured
and held captive. In your writing, create a sense of the narrator’s outlook and mood.

 Form: story.

 Focus: ‘The Prisoner’ – a narrator describing his or her experiences of being captured and held
captive.

 Audience: general – no specific group.

 Purpose: to create a sense of the narrator’s outlook and mood.

A sequel to a successful super-hero/action film has just been released. Write a review of the film for a
magazine for film fans of all ages.

 Form: review.

 Focus: sequel to a successful super-hero/action film.

 Audience: film fans of all ages.

 Purpose: to give a critical response.

A celebrity magazine aimed at teens and young adults publishes an article called ‘Is This the Real
Deal?’ The article explores whether reality television talent/competition shows do more harm than
good. Write the article. In your writing, create a sense of balanced and reasoned arguments.

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  Form: an article for a celebrity magazine.

 Focus: ‘Is This the Real Deal?’ – whether reality television talent/competition shows do more
harm than good.

 Audience: teens and young adults.

 Purpose: to explore the arguments in a balanced and reasonable way.

Activity 2
Example response:

I have to get out of this town. It’s too dangerous for me here now. The Council has spies everywhere
looking for me … looking for traitors. I’m not even sure I can trust my family and haven’t told anyone I
am about to escape. I’m laying here while my husband and family are still asleep, now I get up and
walk softly across the floor and slip on my clothes. I hate acting deceitfully, but I have no choice.

I close the front door and am on the dark street. Even in this dark with the street lights off I feel as if
eyes are on me, like I am being stalked. At any moment I will be hunted down. Each step I take
echoes off the walls and my breathing is loud. I am easy prey making all this noise. I need to get to the
border post where Saliya is waiting for me.

Now I am at the end of the street and enter the corn fields surrounding the town. It’s cold and the
moon is bright so I can see well. But I can also be seen. Parting the tall wreaths of corn makes a loud
rustling. I will surely be heard. I feel inside my pocket for my torch as I will need it when we get to the
forest. I hear swishing. There’s someone behind me. I swing round.

‘Saliya! What are you doing here? We are supposed to meet later…’

She stands there silent and looking pale. She looks frail and weak despite her height. Something is
wrong.

Her hands are behind her back. She’s shoved forward. Out of the darkness behind her a guard
emerges pointing a rifle with a bayonet. The moonlight catches it and I feel the light sting like a splinter
in my eyes.

My skin prickles and for a moment I am frozen. Then I collapse to the ground and start begging for my
life. As the guard comes near enough – too near for a rifle – I grab the barrel and aim it at the ground.

‘Saliya help!’

She knows what to do and barges him hard knocking him the ground. I grab the rifle and we both stand
over him glaring, snorting like bulls. We will march him ahead of us until we near the border post. Then
we will have to find a way to cross.

Activity 3
Example response:

‘Z comes last. So do Z People…’ In Bruce Matlock’s (Director) Z People 2: The Day of Reckoning,
Jediah’s (Zeb Davis) consciousness is transported back to the 1980s, so the Mad Max-style post-
apocalyptic destiny of the world can be averted. What is it with all this rewriting of a storyline’s history
in movies? It’s back to the drawing board for you as you have to relearn your beloved movie’s past.

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 And worse – you have to watch the movie moments you love get trashed as they are rehashed the
way you might pile up leftovers for the family dog.

Z People 2 is a messy sequel (or is it a prequel? I don’t care any more) that again whizzes us back in
time for more messing with the chronology. Super-mutant Garnganuanta, laughably over-acted by
Josh Bladel, goes back to ancient China where the Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon-style-meets-
Prometheus regeneration is stalled, only to resume in 1991. With invisibility-powered Z mutant Eve
(Daisy Smith) hiding herself in the Middle East and Adam (Zeb Davis) passing as a car mechanic in
Detroit, all the other Z mutants continue to gather at the Z mutant global headquarters in Antarctica.
But when nuclear war threatens and the new super-powerful Y-style mutant Garnganuanta arrives, the
Z mutants realise the time for in-fighting is over and they must unite or it’s curtains for the rest of the
world. Suffering from the same incomprehensible excess of gaudy characters that ruined the spin-off Y
Mutant: New Generation, this nevertheless has fun with its 1990s setting, referencing visuals and
sounds from movies and pop videos from that decade. Davis and Smith bring their now-familiar
repartee to the gig, while Bladel looks like a cross between Darth Vader and that wrestler who dresses
in a black cloak (though no one knows why), snarling like a man hamming it up for the kids at the local
pantomime. I almost wanted to shout out, ‘He’s behind you!’ in the over-the-top showdown. Self-
referential jokes about prequels being a let-down (‘I preferred the originals’) knowingly make fun of at
the obvious shoe-horning of the two movie franchises into a new mishmash universe, while some
punching, kicking, car chases and explosions overload the eyes and ears but at least drown out the
popcorn chomping and mobile phone lights of the other people at the cinema. If you have some other
option on a Saturday night you may want to assume you’ve seen all this before – which you have.

Activity 4
Example response:

It is said that everyone will be ‘famous for fifteen minutes’ and a series of recent large-scale surveys
involving hundreds of thousands of people confirms that we are obsessed with the idea of fame and
success. When asked ‘Would you publically humiliate yourself on television for a million dollars?’, an
incredible 92 per cent of those surveyed answered ‘Yes’. What drives our need for kind of attention
and ‘success’ – and is this a good thing?

For many years now, social media has been a feature of our lives. Our TV screens, too, provide us
ordinary folk with a shot at fame for our wonderful cooking, our sublime singing, or even just displaying
our simply brilliant and entertaining personality. Shows such as Cook ’Em Up, The Y Factor and
Master of the House have brought fame and fortune for some but notoriety and shameful z-list status
for others. But could these shows be fuelling the unhealthy idea that attention of any kind is desirable?

We could ask why people want to participate in singing competitions or similar talent shows. Money
and attention are obvious attractions. Ordinary life can be dull and boring after all, and when you look
in magazines and on TV you see wealthy, glamorous celebrities who seem to live a life of untold
riches, luxury and pleasure. We see pop stars and movie stars on screen and think that a talent show
could be a passport to success. Television audiences exercise people-power – and you too might be
‘discovered’ when this audience sees your hidden talents. It’s democracy in action.

Society is often criticised as being consumer-obsessed, the idea being that it is bad to obsess over
material things, and worse to believe they can make you happy. Added to which, all the resources that
are needed to provide these consumer goods are slowly destroying the planet. Surely it is bad that

© Cambridge University Press 2019

 society is so focused on material things and has the collective delusion that this is the path to
happiness? Reality shows are just another part of this materialistic consumer culture in which ‘stars’
are born and die faster than the ping of the filament when a lightbulb fails.

Yet there is some enormous potential and democratisation in internet platforms such as YouTube that
allow people who may not come from the highest social class … who may not have had the best
opportunities … who may not have the right connections, to build careers, followers and, yes, fame.
Maybe such technologies are creating the same kinds of waves in society as the printing press did,
and in a hundred years or so people will see that reality TV and social media brought communication
and connection to the masses across the globe – and that it was a good thing.

So what if some of the performers are terrible? Maybe seeing people make fools of themselves is
actually a good thing because we recognise that it is worth trying. Occasionally there really are talented
people that bring us joy. There has been a rise in ebook publishing and this has allowed many authors
to get their writing published when they couldn’t through the traditional conservative publishing industry.
The fact that people buy and enjoy these books demonstrates that an audience exists for these works.
Reality TV and talent shows are no different. They give anyone a chance at success if they can sing, or
cook, or have some other talent. This is a chance for anyone, not just those who come from music or
acting royalty – or who happen to know how to make a career regardless of their talent.

Overall, whether we like them or not, reality and talent TV shows will be around for a while yet. But
they, like most things, will fade in time. Whether that’s next year or in a hundred years is anybody’s
guess. In truth, they bring a mixture of benefit and harm. The trick may be in seeing them rather like
chocolate – nice as an occasional treat for a bit of sugary pleasure, but have too many and it’ll rot your
teeth (and maybe your brain)!

© Cambridge University Press 2019