Mark Scheme (Results)

Summer 2023

Pearson Edexcel GCSE

In English Language (1EN0)
Paper 2: Non-fiction and Transactional
Writing
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Summer 2023
Question Paper Log Number P71337
Publications Code 1EN0_02_2306_MS
All the material in this publication is copyright
© Pearson Education Ltd 2023

2
 General Marking Guidance

• All candidates must receive the same treatment. Examiners must mark
the last candidate in exactly the same way as they mark the first.
• Mark schemes should be applied positively. Candidates must be
rewarded for what they have shown they can do rather than penalised
for omissions.
• Examiners should mark according to the mark scheme – not according
to their perception of where the grade boundaries may lie.
• All the marks on the mark scheme are designed to be awarded.
Examiners should always award full marks if deserved, i.e. if the answer
matches the mark scheme. Examiners should also be prepared to award
zero marks if the candidate’s response is not worthy of credit
according to the mark scheme.
• Where some judgement is required, mark schemes will provide the
principles by which marks will be awarded and
exemplification/indicative content will not be exhaustive.
• When examiners are in doubt regarding the application of the
mark scheme to a candidate’s response, a senior examiner must be
consulted before a mark is given.
• Crossed out work should be marked unless the candidate has replaced it
with an alternative response.

Specific Marking Guidance

When deciding how to reward an answer, examiners should consult both

the indicative content and the associated marking grid(s). When using a
levels-based mark scheme, the ‘best fit’ approach should be used.
• Examiners should first decide which descriptor most closely matches the
answer and place it in that level.
• The mark awarded within the level will be decided based on the
quality of the answer and will be modified according to how securely
all bullet points are displayed at that level.
• Indicative content is exactly that – they are factual points that candidates
are likely to use to construct their answer.
• It is possible for an answer to be constructed without mentioning
some or all of these points, as long as they provide alternative
responses to the indicative content that fulfils the requirements of

3
 the question. It is the examiner’s responsibility to apply their
professional judgement to the candidate’s response in determining
if the answer fulfils the requirements of the question.

Placing a mark within a level

• Examiners should first decide which descriptor most closely matches the
answer and place it in that level. The mark awarded within the level will
be decided based on the quality of the answer and will be modified
according to how securely all bullet points are displayed at that
level.
• In cases of uneven performance, the points above will still apply.
Candidates will be placed in the level that best describes their
answer according to the descriptors in that level. Marks will be
awarded towards the top or bottom of that level depending on
how they have evidenced each of the descriptor bullet points.
• If the candidate’s answer meets the requirements fully, markers
should be prepared to award full marks within the level. The top mark
in the level is used for work that is as good as can realistically be
expected within that level.

4
 Paper 2 Mark Scheme

The table below shows the number of raw marks allocated for each question in this mark
scheme.

Assessment Objectives Total marks

Component AO1 AO2 AO3 AO4 AO5 AO6

Component 2 –
Non-fiction and
Transactional
Writing

Question 1 2 2

Question 2 2 2

Question 3 15 15

Question 4 1 1

Question 5 1 1

Question 6 15 15

Question 7a 6 6

Question 7b 14 14

Question 8 or 9 24 16 40

5
 Section A: Reading

Question AO1: Identify and interpret explicit and implicit information Mark
Number and ideas
1 Accept any two of the following answers, based on the given lines: (2)

The call came on Friday night, his sister’s voice on the phone: “Can
you come to Achim’s parents’ place tomorrow?” To anyone
listening in, there would have been nothing suspicious about the
call, but Hans-Joachim Tillemann knew it was the signal he had
been waiting for.

• (came) on Friday (night) (1)

• his sister’s voice (1)
• on the phone (1)
• asks him to come to Achim’s place (1)
• anyone listening (in) (1)
• nothing suspicious (1)
• (the) signal (he had been waiting for) (1)

Question AO1: Identify and interpret explicit and implicit information Mark
Number and ideas
2 Accept any reasonable answer, based on the given lines. (2)
Quotations and candidate's own words are acceptable.

A second man directed them to a disused outside lavatory. Inside,

there was a small hole in the floor, just big enough for a man to
slip through. A third conspirator showed them how to get in: you
had to lower yourself in backwards, then slide into the tunnel.
Tillemann stepped in. He found himself in a narrow tunnel, two feet
high and three feet wide, and started crawling. He was under the
Berlin Wall, on his way to freedom.

For example:

• in a ‘disused outside lavatory’ / disused / (outside) lavatory (1)

• small (1)
• ‘hole in the floor’ (1)
• the space is difficult to get into / ‘just big enough for a man to
• slip through’ (1)
• someone shows them where it is / how to get in (1)
• to get into the space you had to drop in backwards (1)
• there is a tunnel you have to ‘slide into’ (1)
• (the tunnel is) narrow (1)
• ‘two feet high’ (1)
• ‘(and) three feet wide’ (1)
• claustrophic (1)
• you can only move through the tunnel by ‘crawling’ (1)
• the tunnel is ‘under the Berlin Wall’ (1)
• the tunnel is a way to freedom (1)

6
In responses to the question, examiners should be aware of the different ways
candidates may structure their responses. There should be sufficient evidence analysing
both language and structure to reward responses. Responses that are unbalanced
cannot access Level 3 or above, where analysis of both language and structure
is required.
Question Indicative content
Number
3 Reward responses that analyse how the text uses language and structure to
interest and engage the reader.

Responses may include the following points about the language of the text:

• the writer begins the extract with the possessive pronoun ‘his’, with no
name mentioned, creating a sense of secrecy from the start
• the contrast between the content of the message and the secret meaning
also builds a sense of tension and excitement: ‘“Can you come to Achim’s
parents’ place tomorrow?”’, ‘Hans-Joachim Tillemann knew it was the
signal he had been waiting for’
• the phrase ‘most daring mass escape’ heightens the danger by reference
to the scale and suggesting others were less important, daring or exciting
• language is used to emphasise that there are restrictions in place in East
Germany: ‘listening in’, ‘suspicious’, ‘The border guards probably noticed
nothing out of the ordinary’, ‘not allowed’, ‘cutting East Germany off from
the outside world’
• this is further emphasised by the use of negatives to underpin the idea
that the escape is dangerous and tense: ‘nothing suspicious’, ‘nothing out
of the ordinary’, ‘not unusual’, ‘no light’, ‘not allowed’, ‘‘‘don’t know’’’, ‘‘‘no
sense’’’
• emotive language heightens the sense of tension in the escape: ‘daring’,
‘risking’, ‘nervous’, ‘orders to shoot’
• references to danger show the risk that people are taking in trying to leave
East Germany: ‘risking their lives’, ‘orders to shoot’, ‘The space was so
narrow one woman became stuck’
• references to final opportunities emphasise the significance of the escape:
‘last chance’, ‘last opportunity’, ‘running out of time’
• the writer uses literary language to create a sense of narrative, almost as
if it is a spy novel: ‘The call came on Friday night’, ‘He glanced over the
wall, at the building opposite’, ‘Mr Tillemann whispered the password:
“Tokyo”’, ‘Tillemann stepped in’
• language connected with espionage is used to create tension and
excitement: ‘suspicious’, ‘daring mass escape’, ‘the escape team’,
‘whispered the password’, ‘third conspirator’, ‘undercover couriers’
• this is further emphasised by language used to show the need to be quiet:
‘whispered the password’, ‘motioned them… to make as little noise as
possible’, ‘padded through the hallway in their socks’
• those helping the escape and others escaping are not named, which
demonstrates the need for secrecy and the danger involved in trying to
escape: ‘the escape team’, ‘someone was waiting’, ‘A second man’, ‘A third
conspirator’, ‘one woman’
• the writer’s descriptions of the scale of the tunnel create a sense of fear
and danger: ‘a narrow tunnel, two feet high and three feet wide, and
started crawling’, ‘loose dirt’, ‘The space was so narrow’; this contrasts
with the number of people in it: ‘There were several people in the tunnel’
• the writer’s vivid descriptions of Tillemann’s physical state before the
escape demonstrate the further risk to him: ‘emergency operation’, ‘acute
appendicitis’, ‘stitches were fresh in his side’

7
• the writer shows the risks that Tillemann has already taken in trying to
leave East Germany, which creates emphasis on why this is his last chance
to escape: ‘he had already spent eight months in a Communist prison for
trying to cross the Berlin Wall’, ‘his call-up papers for compulsory military
service had arrived’.

Responses may include the following points about the structure of the text:

• the opening sentence of the extract is structured to create pace and

tension: ‘The call came on Friday night, his sister’s voice on the phone’
• the extract moves from the present escape to the past attempts to escape,
which helps to build the tension and create the sense that this escape has
to be successful
• the writer uses colons to punctuate sentences, again, creating pace and
tension: ‘his sister’s voice on the phone: “Can you come to Achim’s
parents’ place tomorrow?”’, ‘From this point on, they were risking their
lives: the border guards had orders to shoot’, ‘Mr Tillemann whispered the
password: “Tokyo”’, ‘A third conspirator showed them how to get in: you
had to lower yourself in backwards’
• the writer frequently starts sentences with the conjunction ‘But’ (also could
be identified as repetition) and also uses the conjunction ‘If’ to start a
sentence, creating interest and emphasis as there is a feeling of doubt that
the escape will be successful: ‘But Tillemann knew it was their last chance’,
‘If anything had gone wrong’, ‘But the tunnel would be his last opportunity
to get out of East Berlin’, ‘But we knew it would end in freedom’
• the writer uses some short sentences to create impact and tension: ‘There
was no light’, ‘Mr Tillemann whispered the password: “Tokyo”’, ‘Tillemann
stepped in’
• repetition of ‘nothing’ creates a feeling that, although things appear to be
as ‘normal’ as they usually are, they are anything but: ‘nothing suspicious’,
‘nothing out of the ordinary’
• the repetition of ‘last’ builds tension and creates the idea of the people
escaping having no other option: ‘last chance’, ‘last opportunity’
• the writer repeats ‘under’ frequently, emphasising the means of escape
and the daring nature of it: ‘under the Berlin Wall’, ‘under the wall’
• the use of a single quotation from Tillemann contrasts with the style of the
rest of the extract and creates interest in the reader about his fate, as it
assumes he is alive
• the final description leaves the reader with a sense of foreboding about the
success of the escape as it demonstrates that the tunnel has not been
created by experienced construction workers: ‘some West Berlin students’.

(15 marks)

8
Level Mark AO2: Explain, comment on and analyse how writers use
language and structure to achieve effects and influence
readers, using relevant subject terminology to support their
views
0 No rewardable material.

Level 1 1–3 • Limited comment on the text.

• Identification of the language and/or structure used to
achieve effects and influence readers.
• The use of references is limited.

Level 2 4–6 • Comment on the text.

• Comment on the language and/or structure used to
achieve effects and influence readers, including use of
vocabulary.
• The selection of references is valid, but not developed.
NB: The mark awarded cannot progress beyond the top of
Level 2 if only language OR structure has been considered.

Level 3 7–9 • Explanation of the text.

• Explanation of how both language and structure are
used to achieve effects and influence readers, including
use of vocabulary and sentence structure.
• The selection of references is appropriate and relevant
to the points being made.

Level 4 10–12 • Exploration of the text.

• Exploration of how both language and structure are
used to achieve effects and influence readers, including
use of vocabulary, sentence structure and other
language features.
• The selection of references is detailed, appropriate and
fully supports the points being made.

Level 5 13–15 • Analysis of the text.

• Analysis of how both language and structure are used
to achieve effects and influence readers, including use
of vocabulary, sentence structure and other language
features.
• The selection of references is discriminating and
clarifies the points being made.

9
Question AO1: Identify and interpret explicit and implicit information Mark
Number and ideas
4 Accept any reasonable answer based on the given lines. (1)
Quotations and candidate's own words are acceptable.

That’s all I lived for – escape, escape, by myself or with others: but
in any case to escape, to have it away, to make a break. It was an
obsession: I never talked about it, but it haunted me. And I’d
accomplish my ideal without weakening: I’d break out and away.

For example:
• it is everything he lived for / he is determined (1)
• he does not mind whether he escapes ‘by myself or with others’
(1)
• ‘It was an obsession’ (1)
• he keeps his feelings about it to himself / ‘never talked about it’
(1)
• ‘it haunted me’ (1)
• he feels confident he can do it / ‘I’d accomplish my ideal’ (1)
• it is his ultimate aim / ‘my ideal’ (1)

Question AO1: Identify and interpret explicit and implicit information Mark
Number and ideas
5 Accept any reasonable answer based on the given lines. (1)
Quotations and candidate's own words are acceptable.

‘I’ll hollow out a place in a retaining wall – I’ll take out a big stone
and make a kind of little cave. That way, when a section comes
along, I’ll only have to lift the stone, hide the wood, and put it back
again.’

For example:
• he will ‘hollow out a place (in a retaining wall)’ (1)
• he plans to remove a large stone (1)
• he is going to ‘make a kind of little cave’ (1)
• when he receives a section he will ‘lift the stone’ (1)
• he will hide the wood (in the cave) (1)
• he will place the stone back in place after the sections are
hidden (1)

10
Question Indicative content
Number
6 Reward responses that evaluate how successfully the attempt to show the
importance of planning is shown.

References to writer’s techniques should only be credited at Level 2 and

above if they support the critical judgement of the text.

Responses may include:

• the opening and ending of the extract are focused on the idea of the intended
escape, which successfully frames the idea that planning is important: ‘to make
a break’, ‘I was getting ready for a break’
• it could be argued that the ideas of individual and group escape show a lack of
control over planning since they suggest some level of spontaneity or reliance on
another person which could be unpredictable: ‘by myself or with others’, ‘he was
the man I wanted to make the break with’
• in the text Papillon’s planning is reliant on other people in order to be organised,
which perhaps limits the effectiveness of this scheme as they may be unreliable
or untrustworthy: ‘‘I’ll set you up a defence in case of anything going wrong’’,
‘‘I’ve found a man who’ll make me the raft: I’ve found a man who’ll get the
sections out of the yard for me. It’s up to you to find a place in your garden to
bury it in’’
• the theme of escape effectively highlights how careful planning could be a
matter of life or death: ‘‘I’ll set you up a defence in case of anything going
wrong’’, ‘‘would be too dangerous, because there are screws that go stealing
vegetables at night’’, ‘‘too risky’’
• the detail in the plans create confidence that Papillon is significantly organised.
Papillon tells another prisoner ‘‘I’ve got two thousand francs for you if you’ll
make the thing I want’’, ‘‘I’ll set you up a defence in case of anything going
wrong’ and ‘I’ll copy the plan of the raft on exercise-book paper myself’’;
Matthieu tells Papillon ‘‘I’ll hollow out a place in a retaining wall – I’ll take out a
big stone and make a kind of little cave’’ and how he will ‘‘work out a scheme for
them to leave each piece in some different place, not too far from the garden’’;
Papillon notes that ‘‘he’d taken care to put moss all round it’’
• the focus on the idea that punishment could be given is useful to help the reader
understand why planning is significant, as there is much to lose: ‘‘In this way I
prevent you being tortured if you’re taken, and you only risk six months at the
most’’, ‘‘we’d have had it’’
• the writer’s feelings about escape create both positive and negative feelings
about his plan: in the opening he could be described as desperate, which may
make him reckless (‘It was an obsession’), and in the ending he is presented ‘in
terrific spirits’, suggesting he could be calmer and more cautious
• the writer explores the idea that taking time is important, which is effective in
building the reader’s confidence that planning is taking place: ‘It was a month
now that plans for the break had been on the go’, ‘I did more than two hours of
physical training on the rocks every morning’
• events showing Papillon’s plans are presented in a chronological sequence, which
helps the reader to feel confident in how organised he is: getting money to pay
someone to make a raft, creating a scale plan, setting up a defence, moving and
hiding the pieces of the raft, eating well and building physical strength
• this is emphasised through the final section of the extract, which is effective in
creating confidence in his planning, as it has covered not only the equipment he
needs to escape, but also his physical and emotional fitness: ‘I was eating better
than I’d ever eaten before, and fishing kept me wonderfully fit. On top of that, I
did more than two hours of physical training on the rocks every morning.’

(15 marks)

11
Level Mark AO4: Evaluate texts critically and support this with appropriate
textual reference
0 No rewardable material.

Level 1 1–3 • Description of ideas, events, themes or settings.

• Limited assertions are offered about the text.
• The use of references is limited.

Level 2 4–6 • Comment on ideas, events, themes or settings.

• Straightforward opinions with limited judgements are
offered about the text.
• The selection of references is valid, but not developed.

Level 3 7–9 • Explanation of ideas, events, themes or settings.

• Informed judgement is offered about the text.
• The selection of references is appropriate and relevant to
the points being made.

Level 4 10–12 • Analysis of ideas, events, themes or settings.

• Well-informed and developed critical judgement is offered
about the text.
• The selection of references is appropriate, detailed and
fully supports the points being made.

Level 5 13–15 • Evaluation of ideas, events, themes or settings.

• There is a sustained and detached critical overview and
judgement about the text.
• The selection of references is apt and discriminating and is
persuasive in clarifying the points being made.

12
Question Indicative content
Number
7(a) Candidates must draw on BOTH texts to access marks.

Responses may include:

• both men plan an escape: in Text 1 it is from East Germany, and in Text 2 it is
from an island prison
• both men have thought about escape before trying to make it: in Text 1
Tillemann waits for ‘the signal’ and in Text 2 Papillon says escape is ‘all I lived
for’
• both men attempt to escape via hidden means: in Text 1 there is a tunnel
accessed through a hole in the floor of a disused lavatory, and in Text 2
Papillon’s raft pieces are being hidden as they are being built
• both men are taking a risk in trying to escape: in Text 1 those escaping are
‘risking their lives’ and in Text 2 Papillon risks being caught and his
conspirators being ‘tortured’ and sentenced to more time in prison
• both men have to try to avoid being caught by guards: in Text 1 the border
guards and Text 2 the prison guards, ‘screws’
• both men know that something could go wrong: in Text 1 there is an ‘escape
team’ to alert them if something goes wrong, and in Text 2 Papillon comes up
with a ‘defence’ in case the prisoner helping him is caught
• in both texts the men rely on others to help them escape: in Text 1 there is an
escape team who will signal if anything goes wrong, and in Text 2 Papillon
cannot escape without the help of the man who is making the raft and also
Carbonieri
• both men are trying to escape via small means: in Text 1 escape is via a
‘narrow tunnel’ and in Text 2 it is on a ‘raft big enough for two’
• in both texts the men have health considerations: in Text 1 Tillemann has
stitches following an emergency operation and in Text 2 Papillon is trying to
make himself fit and healthy for the escape
• in both texts the men are reflecting on their experience: in Text 1 Tillemann
says ‘‘‘I don’t know how long I was in the tunnel’’’, and in Text 2 Papillon says
‘That’s all I lived for’.
(6 marks)

Level Mark AO1: Select and synthesise evidence from different texts
0 No rewardable material.

Level 1 1–2 • Limited understanding of similarities.

• Limited synthesis of the two texts.
• The use of evidence is limited.
Level 2 3–4 • Sound understanding of similarities.
• Clear synthesis of the two texts.
• The selection of evidence is valid but not developed and
there may be an imbalance.
Level 3 5–6 • Detailed understanding of similarities.
• Detailed synthesis of the two texts.
• The selection of evidence is appropriate and relevant to
the points being made.

13
 In responses to the following question, examiners should be aware of the different ways
candidates may structure their responses. There should be sufficient evidence in the
response analysing each text, and comparing the texts to reward responses.

Responses that are unbalanced will not be able to access Level 3 or above,
where explanation of writers’ ideas and perspectives is required alongside a
range of comparisons between texts.

Question Indicative content

Number
7(b) Reward responses that compare how each writer presents ideas and perspectives about
escape.

Responses may include:

• both texts show people who are desperate to escape: in Text 1 Tillemann has
already spent time in prison for ‘trying to cross the Berlin Wall’ and in Text 2 Papillon
says escape ‘was an obsession’
• both texts show that lies and deceit are important in escape: in Text 1 Tillemann
takes a call with a hidden signal in it and has to give a password to enter the tunnel
and in Text 2 Papillon has to come up with ‘a defence’ in case the other prisoner is
caught making the raft
• both texts involve escape from places that have guards to prevent people from
escaping: in Text 1 these are ‘border guards’ and in Text 2 these are prison officers,
‘screws’
• both texts show something being made to assist with the escape: in Text 1 this is a
tunnel dug by West German students; in Text 2 it is a raft made by a fellow prisoner
• in both texts the means of escape are small and pose risks to those using them: in
Text 1 the tunnel is only ‘two feet high and three feet wide’, there is ‘loose dirt’ and
the potential for getting stuck (‘The space was so narrow one woman became stuck
and had to be pushed’), and in Text 2 Papillon’s raft is for only two people and is
built by a fellow prisoner, who tells him that it is difficult to find ‘wood that floats,
because here on the islands everything’s hardwood and sinks’
• both texts show the significant dangers involved in trying to escape: in Text 1
Tillemann makes a ‘daring’ escape which is ‘risking their lives’ as guards have ‘orders
to shoot’ and in Text 2 Papillon knows that being caught risks extra time in prison or
‘being tortured’
• both texts suggest that there is no alternative to escape and that this is a necessary
thing to do: in Text 1 the writer says this is Tillemann’s ‘last opportunity to get out of
East Berlin’ and in Text 2 Papillon says escape is ‘all I lived for’ and ‘it haunted me’
• Text 1 says escape from East Germany has been attempted before, ‘the most daring
mass escape ever attempted from East Germany’, ‘he had already spent eight
months in a Communist prison for trying to cross the Berlin Wall’, while in Text 2
there is no evidence that anyone has escaped before, other than the fact that the
men know there will be consequences
• In Text 1 the writer presents both the plan for escape and the escape itself, ‘They
padded through the hallway in their socks’, ‘He was under the Berlin Wall, on his way
to freedom’, while in Text 2 the writer presents only the plan for escape, so the
reader is unaware of whether the plan is carried out
• both texts show the importance of other people enlisted in helping those who are
escaping. In Text 1 there is a mysterious caller who tells Tillemann the escape is
happening, there is an ‘escape team’ to let them know if anything goes wrong and
there is a man who lets them access the tunnel and motions to tell them what to do.
In Text 2 Papillon cannot escape without another prisoner making a raft for him and
Carbonieri hiding the pieces
• both texts show that more than one person will be escaping, although in Text 1 the
writer presents the scale of the escape as bigger than that in Text 2. In Text 1 more
than two people are leaving, ‘several people in the tunnel, all making their way

14
 under the wall’, whereas in Text 2 the plan is that only Papillon and Carbonieri will
escape
• in both texts there are health issues that affect the escapes. In Text 1, Tillemann’s
health may be a hindrance to escape as ‘he had needed an emergency operation for
acute appendicitis a few days before, and the stitches were still fresh in his side’,
whereas in Text 2 Papillon prepares for his health to be at its best for the escape: ‘I
was eating better than I’d ever eaten before, and fishing kept me wonderfully fit.’

(14 marks)

15
Level Mark AO3: Compare writers’ ideas and perspectives, as well as how
these are conveyed, across two or more texts
0 No rewardable material.

Level 1 1–2 • The response does not compare the texts.

• Description of writers’ ideas and perspectives, including theme,
language and/or structure.
• The use of references is limited.

Level 2 3–5 • The response considers obvious comparisons between the texts.
• Comment on writers’ ideas and perspectives, including theme,
language and/or structure.
• The selection of references is valid, but not developed.
NB: The mark awarded cannot progress beyond the top of
Level 2 if only ONE text has been considered in detail.

Level 3 6–8 • The response considers a range of comparisons between the

texts.
• Explanation of writers’ ideas and perspectives including theme,
language and/or structure.
• The selection of references is appropriate and relevant to the
points being made.

Level 4 9–11 • The response considers a wide range of comparisons between the
texts.
• Exploration of writers’ ideas and perspectives including how the
theme, language and/or structure are used across the texts.
• References are balanced across both texts and fully support the
points being made.

Level 5 12–14 • The response considers a varied and comprehensive range of

comparisons between the texts.
• Analysis of writers’ ideas and perspectives including how the
theme, language and/or structure are used across the texts.
• References are balanced across both texts, they are
discriminating, and clarify the points being made.

16
 Section B: Transactional Writing

Refer to the writing assessment grids at the end of this section when marking
Question 8 and Question 9.

Question Indicative content

Number
*8 Purpose: to write the text for a speech to inform and/or persuade.

Audience: the writing is for the candidate’s peers. The focus is on

communicating ideas about the importance of personal freedom. This can
involve a range of approaches.

Form: the response should be set out as a speech using organisational

features. There should be clear organisation and structure with an introduction,
development of points and a conclusion.

Responses may:
• offer ideas about types of personal freedom, for example: freedom of
speech, freedom of movement around the country or internationally,
freedom of religion, gender, political view or sexuality, freedom of thought,
freedom of expression through looks, art, music or writing
• suggest reasons why personal freedom is important, for example:
differences can be celebrated, freedom to be the way you want to be
enhances and challenges society, people who have personal freedom are
happy and creative
• offer comments on the positives and negatives of personal freedom, for
example: positives such as enhancing the variety within society, pride as
individuals, creativity and challenge, protecting people who are different,
and negatives such as potential law-breaking, protests that can become
violent or dangerous, people being encouraged to be involved in risky or
dangerous behaviour, people being discriminated against.

(40 marks)

(includes 16 marks for the range of vocabulary and sentence structures

for clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate use of spelling and
punctuation)

17
Question Indicative content
Number
*9 Purpose: to write an article for a newspaper to inform or advise.

Audience: newspaper readers. Candidates can choose which newspaper they

are writing for. The focus is on communicating ideas about whether teamwork is
important in today’s society. This may involve a range of approaches.

Form: the response should be set out as an article using organisational

features. Some candidates may use stylistic conventions of an article such as
subheadings or occasional use of bullet points. Candidates do not have to
include features of layout like columns or pictures. There should be clear
organisation and structure with an introduction, development of points and a
conclusion.

Responses may:
• give views about working with other people to achieve something, for
example: it can help to achieve the task more efficiently, it means that
people get to know one another’s strengths and areas for improvement,
it helps people to cooperate and be supportive, it means more ideas are
generated as more people share their views
• give views about working alone to achieve a goal, for example: it means
you can be more productive as there are fewer distractions, it avoids
conflict, it means that only one person is responsible for meeting a
deadline and avoids this being missed, there is more flexibility if you
work alone as you are not reliant on others
• offer examples of successful and/or unsuccessful teams and what they
have or have not achieved, for example: sporting teams such as football,
rugby or cricket teams that have won leagues or been relegated,
Government groups that have advised on policy or changed history,
groups working together on reality television shows such as The
Apprentice that were or were not successful.

(40 marks)

(includes 16 marks for the range of vocabulary and sentence structures

for clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate use of spelling and
punctuation)

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 Writing assessment grids for Question 8 and Question 9
AO5:
• Communicate clearly, effectively and imaginatively, selecting and adapting
tone, style and register for different forms, purposes and audiences
• Organise information and ideas, using structural and grammatical features to
support coherence and cohesion of texts

Level Mark The candidate:

0 • provides no rewardable material

Level 1 1–4 • offers a basic response, with audience and/or purpose not fully
established
• expresses information and ideas, with limited use of structural
and grammatical features

Level 2 5–9 • shows an awareness of audience and purpose, with

straightforward use of tone, style and register
• expresses and orders information and ideas; uses paragraphs and
a range of structural and grammatical features

Level 3 10–14 • selects material and stylistic or rhetorical devices to suit audience
and purpose, with appropriate use of tone, style and register
• develops and connects appropriate information and ideas;
structural and grammatical features and paragraphing make
meaning clear

Level 4 15–19 • organises material for particular effect, with effective use of tone,
style and register
• manages information and ideas, with structural and grammatical
features used cohesively and deliberately across the text

Level 5 20–24 • shapes audience response with subtlety, with sophisticated and
sustained use of tone, style and register
• manipulates complex ideas, utilising a range of structural and
grammatical features to support coherence and cohesion.

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AO6: Candidates must use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures for
clarity, purpose and effect, with accurate spelling and punctuation

Level Mark The candidate:

0 • provides no rewardable material

Level 1 1-3 • uses basic vocabulary, often misspelled

• uses punctuation with basic control, creating undeveloped, often
repetitive, sentence structures

Level 2 4-6 • writes with a range of correctly spelt vocabulary, e.g. words with
regular patterns such as prefixes, suffixes, double consonants
• uses punctuation with control, creating a range of sentence
structures, including coordination and subordination

Level 3 7-9 • uses a varied vocabulary and spells words containing irregular
patterns correctly
• uses accurate and varied punctuation, adapting sentence
structure to contribute positively to purpose and effect

Level 4 10-12 • uses a wide, selective vocabulary with only occasional spelling
errors
• positions a range of punctuation for clarity, managing sentence
structures for deliberate effect

Level 5 13-16 • uses an extensive vocabulary strategically; rare spelling errors do

not detract from overall meaning
• punctuates writing with accuracy to aid emphasis and precision,
using a range of sentence structures accurately and selectively to
achieve particular effects.

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