Till Lindemann - 100 Gedichte (2020) (Eng Ues)

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TILL LINDEMANN
100
GEDICHTE
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TILL LINDEMANN * 100 GEDICHTE
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ENGLISCH ÜBERSETZUNG
ENGLISH TRANSLATION
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FROM THE TRANSLATOR
Alleine bin ich immer hier

Alleine werd ich immer sein
Nimmt mich einer ins Visier
Fang mir eine Kugel ein
These lines are to be met up with in the book, and

I do not have any intention to explore here what the poem
to which they belong is exactly about. Yet I`d like to bring
them here out as an epigraph – so as they are, untouched
in their original form. When thinking once over this poem,
among the thoughts and images it could have held there
came to the mind the following ones as well …
A creator of art works – any works, regardless of the
subject matter – is ever alone. Ever alone, and at the same
time ever in front of the audience, in front of the crowd –
its mass as a single entity, and also in front of each and
every one of its members. As a target. And this audience
is waiting, and it is hungry. And ready to judge – with the
myriad of the eyes, minds, hearts of this huge, wild animal,
and with every tiny little part of its collective spirit, every
living soul individually.
Refrain not to kill is right.

Everyone makes their own choice.
-3-
To make a translation of this book, an inadvertent
curiosity so it happened has played its role. I am only a
reader, as many other readers are, those who appreciate
the art of literature. And if there is an opportunity to
read something in the original language – it is a blessing.
Once I was told that due to their exceptional individuality
translating Till`s poems into certain languages* to retain
rhyme, rhythm, and not lose with all of that the essence of
their message is an impossible task, and that there is no
other way than to give something away to sacrifice.
Till`s poems do possess this exceptional individuality
of theirs. And for this they are precious. They do not
always follow the traditional rhyming rules, but their own
music, their own melody exists in every one of them. And
a question came up, could it after all be done so to find
a harmony with that original melody of the poems or at
least its closest equivalents in other languages too, so to
preserve with it their heart and soul as fully as possible …
One poem after another, this endeavour has delivered
eventually lots of pleasure. And my wish as of a translator
now is to try to make the true lyrical beauty of this unique
writer and artist perceivable for the non-German reader
as close to the best of what its native language offers as
it can be reached. It is like an ocean – with its own secrets,
its own world hidden in the depths under the mirror-like
illusively shimmering surface … What these depths would
choose to reveal to those who dare to look into them – is
also a secret.
L.L.
Spring 2021.
-4-
FOREWORD
From Alexander Gorkow
Eight years ago, during the final round of a Rammstein

tour, practically every day in the early afternoons Till and I
sat on the outskirts of little towns in America and read
his poems. I remember how in Phoenix, Arizona, at lunch
in some desert a bird was watching us and maybe even
listening. It was a slender, black, infinitely beautiful bird.
With uncommonly large, oval eyes it followed as we took
one sheet of paper after another, read softly aloud, then
read once again, differently emphasized, stroke something
out, put the sheet away again.
The bird perched on the table where we had our seats
taken, right between us, albeit on the edge of the surface
so that it could take off in case of danger. It appeared
to be extraordinarily trusting. “Well, you,” said Till to the
bird, while it was staring by turns at Till and at me. It took
a crumb of bread in the beak, but dropped it back. It was
some lyrical bird, probably. When we finished, got up and
left, the bird remained on the table. It continued looking
at us from out there even as we got into the car and drove
back to the hotel. Who knows if it is still sitting there.
Again and again since then we returned in our memory to
Phoenix – and to that slender black bird during the lunch
time under the open sky.
It was in 2012. The finished volume of poems,
the forerunner of this book here, we named then, in
2013, after one of its lyrical motifs: “In stillen Nächten”
(“On Silent Nights”). Many of the readers were genuinely
surprised after that at the amount of gentleness in the
texts of a man whose rock band Rammstein did not just
open the doors with their art but kicked them down.
-5-
Life took its course. Everyone knows what it means
when life takes its course. Till continued to send poems,
tell stories. We talked, he wrote, he sent, through E-mail
or nicely by post. Some came by SMS, among them the
huge ones or baked dry to just two lines, somewhere from
a plane over the Atlantic or from the North-East Germany,
where he grew up and still lives up to these days, or from
a concert dressing room somewhere in the world.
Till also, when sitting across someone, is a very
precise, explicit storyteller; it flows quietly, rich in
details, effortlessly as if carelessly, and at the same time
amazingly rhythmically. He reminds of a narrator from
some definitely pre-electric, old, old times, let`s say from
400 years ago: dishes with fruits fermented and pheasants
brought down, the flies above, life is finite and must be
lived as thoroughly as possible. Around the narrator,
the dear little ones are scampering, who had not until only
a moment ago suspected anything about death, they stare
and listen; comedies, burlesques, shivery theatricals, and
acts of tragedies. But the hero here is from these days,
let`s say: a classic modernist.
His predecessor might have, perhaps, been the poet
and illustrator Paul Scheerbart, who passed away early
from this world having died in Berlin in 1915 at the age
not at all old. With Ernst Rowohlt, Scheerbart published
in 1909 his “Hangover Poetry”, which, almost ultimately
and unfairly forgotten now, exactly in Berlin prepared the
grounds for a tremendous defiance, an endless rebellion.
Who in the city throws the flames and in the dark asserts
themselves, they may probably be the first in modern
poetry akin to the explicitly demonstrated fuck-finger:
A character is only stubbornness;

I am content with myself.
I waste myself in all the ways;
Well, with each other we are so different.
-6-
Till`s manner of handling words concerning
the practical things in life is not only erratic compared
to the meticulous art of his storytelling. To say it lightly.
He is extremely interested in personal matters. For this,
he pushes aside everything that gets on the nerves and
takes from life its time – for instance, trivial organizational
questions – like a mighty ship does push through the sea.
Till adheres to that eternal concept of Michel de Montaigne
that it is our supreme task – to live. There is nothing
more important than this. But that`s a great deal – Life.
The editor writes then to him trivially that a book called
“100 Poems” should contain 100 poems, and that until
now, not long before giving the thing to the print, there
are only 97. The only answer from Till Lindemann
delivered is this: “Hahaha.”
Nonetheless, there were 100 poems assembled.
Two poems from back then, from “On Silent Nights”,
were set afterwards on fire by Rammstein. Today they
blaze at central positions during the concert shows: “Was
ich liebe” (“What I Love”) and “Puppe” (“Doll”). One poem
from this volume was composed while we were still in
the process of working on the previous book – it landed
on Till`s “Lindemann” album with Peter Tägtgren; out of
“Ach so gern” (“Ach so Willingly”) the two of them created
a tango in the countryside studio near Stockholm.
It seems: this book is a raw material. Others would
say, it first and foremost is a raw material.
I love music
Though quiet should it be
So let it begin. Till reads this softly aloud on an autumn

day in Munich while sitting between the papers that are
lying around, the ones that have slipped to the floor
and are scattered across the table, the beloved texts and
the rejected ones. He looks then up and stares into the air.
-7-
A song? We`ll see. No bird anywhere near at hand.
The bird in Phoenix? We are both sure, it is still flitting
somewhere around there …
-8-
MUSIC
Loneliness is a concert
It`s roaring out of my throat
The violins are screeching graciously
The harps are crawling into flesh
The voice is jumping out of my mouth
And singing vigorously in the ears
The kettledrum beats with wrath
Into the gates of my soul
-9-
AT THE SEASHORE
At the seashore at the seashore

On a stone
An excited man is sitting
And actually so
That this excitedness can be seen
What is he doing there, what is he doing there

He`s looking at the young maids
They are naked
He is old
He`s getting hot
Cold the maids remain
- 10 -
CAPTAIN
Where is the captain

I cannot anywhere
Anywhere at all see him
No one is to find about
And the feet are wet
We are going to get drowned
Bygone the festive revelries
- 11 -
MONEY
Who knows how long love keeps its hold

I love you and you love of my finances gold
- 12 -
MINE
With your heartlet

It seems has no agreement any longer
Beats somehow differently now
To the unknown tact
From your pulse

From you detached
Stumbles over own blood
Doesn`t recognize the alien rustle anymore
Beats spiritless
And so forsaken
The memories have grown so faded
It`s just an overboiled stock
Knows the heart well what it`s looking for

Flying away like some crow
With a stolen fruit
And searching for your proximity
- 13 -
QUIET
I love music
Though quiet should it be
- 14 -
RUFFIAN
I am a genuine ruffian
Holding on to rules is not my line
Do what I please
And the fun just yet begins
I do what cannot be allowed
Bitterly angry with women and men
Antagonize the whole world like this
Each and every one, all suffer from distress
The animals don`t
Ain`t care whatevs
- 15 -
LEISURE TIME
I had the time, she needed money

There I asked her
Considerations were not long
And she hadn`t at all said No
She had the money
I needed time
Empty pockets
Nothing to booze
And by foot to walk home
- 16 -
AND THEY`RE CALLING ME
They are calling

And they are yelling
Take us in the mouth
At your pleasure
Claim us
Here we are waiting
The appetite as yet is bearable
But they are calling so unbearably
Crying absolutely terribly
We want so want you only
We`ll taste to you indeed delicious
All the fingers you will lick
Place us into yourself please
Take us out of the cookpot`s heat
I can no longer this resist

Start already grating cheese
In front of me they`re on the table standing
Spaghetti bolognese
- 17 -
HEARTLESS
Soon we`ll not anymore be again united

So many tears that are not cried out
Strong hands beautiful legs
But no eyes
When I am crying
And heartless
- 18 -
THE GUILT IS ALWAYS MINE
Here is a clear thing

Without words I scream
Honestly attempt to cheat
Tell the truth as if deceit
And the years draw by in the land
Have neither sparrows in the hand
Nor the pigeons on the roof
Only sorrow for my youth
I must kiss you

Must feel you
Want to hold you
And touch
Ought to breathe you in
Talk to you
And
I`d wish to admire you
But should penalize
Nest at your side
Sleep by you
Yet every day I recognize
You are simply disgusting
Cruel incessantly
Loving you brings no delight
Long enough I have endured you
Duty is guilty for this crime
With sadness now I provide the clarity
My lies are all the truths
You are simply disgusting
And therefore the guilt again is mine
- 19 -
MAIL
My tears sending
Under the clothes is the address
Should not fuck you any more
The sender is sorrowfulness
My heart is so heavy
Merry is everyone else
Everything is Christmassy already
The Christmas tree
Your garments
Are ablaze
- 20 -
CHAIN
He was alone
So lonesome
Didn`t want to live anymore
Then there a dog came
And held him beloved
Returned life back to him
Saved his heart and soul
Straight off thence
He enchained the doggie
- 21 -
LEACKING
When I am licking her legs

And do not swallow
The slaver draws out
The trail is
Like of a snail dragging thick strands
Somewhat of a lad`s dew running home
With saliva
A race
When her legs I am licking
Breathe purely the scent in
Do not wish at this moment
To be anywhere else
- 22 -
I TALK
About this and that

I talk non-stop without let-up
I ask this I ask that
Do you really enjoy fucking
She looks angrily
But I want to be just friendly

Be of service to you verbally
Wish nothing at all from you, absolutely
I am only to entertain you here with talking
Ooh he`s suddenly inside

Ah after all it`s not so bad
That can still really happen
What`s the need of being so shy
And the night is so dark
All done without light deliberately
- 23 -
HIGHWAY
They laid me under a bridge

And never returned
South they drove off
Do not know how I am called
Do not know how I am old in years
Do not know when the first tooth was
They never came back
On the highway I was born
- 24 -
INGRATITUDE
The insect fell into the water

Could well have already drowned
I was the one who did the good
Carefully I held the hand out
Felt around for it
Took it out of the cold flood
It stung me that same moment
That was painful
- 25 -
ARMLESS BEAR
The wretched bear is dead

In blood fell
In warm
The brown
Shoulder, fur, gone
Inside
Outside red
Lost just both arms
Rusty machetes
Cannot pray now any more
The helpless bear the defenseless
Before a child`s bed

The child
Also will be dead soon
Cannot bleed
Nor take hold of anything
Same as the bear`s
Both of the arms are at rest
Rusty machetes
With the mother didn`t want to pray
The helpless child the defenseless
- 26 -
DEATH DANCE
Give me something
Blows through the room
Cold draught
The red foam on your lips
A tag hangs on your toe
There`s just nothing anymore to hurt you
The eggs roll out of the nest

Hard by the hair hold you
Never again to soothe my lust to rest
You wish with disgust again it
Should you nourish the greenery of my rage

Please let the tears flow
Behind the eyes the dam is breaking
Overflowing with water
the skin-rinded hardened stem
Before you
Afraid of you
Red foam
The fright with joy is blessed
A cold wind
Through the room blows
A tag hangs
On your toe
Pinch you
That does not hurt you
- 27 -
No one here wants to dance
You hold me coldly
You hold absolutely silently
Walk out avoiding to look
At the tag
On your blue toe
- 28 -
UNREQUIRED PROPERTY
I love my wife
I love my wife very much
And everything would have been wonderful
If for too long already she haven`t been
My spouse, the other half
The marriage duties, I have to say

Are hard with her to bear
Splendid if instead of her
there could be someone else
Always the same is not so pleasant
I just know her too well

For too long she is my wife by now
Attracts me with her charms since that so greatly
The neighbour`s wife from nearby
Beautiful the body and the face

But with my own property it`s not that nice
With the own property it`s not so welcome
I`d rather something farther on seek out
- 29 -
COMPLETE LOSS
Do have a glance he must be standing there

Really bad to look at
He doesn`t want to wash the anus
The cheek pouches foully smell
Crotch sweat into the clothes` textile has crept
As a rotten lump reeks
The armpits are with curly ruffle filled
A welcome for the fat lice brothel
Last but not the least, on the feet
The stockings etched into the sole meat
And also need be emphasized
The complete loss of self-esteem and vanity
Not washed the prickle
All and everything to high heaven stinks
- 30 -
LOVE
Wait oh wait I like you

Give you my heart and gold and stars
Within the ribs a fire is burning
That in naivety one calls Love
Your soul crumpling I fold up

Into the fire of fortune lay it
The whole thing in flames soon stands
Little pile of ashes is all what remains
- 31 -
ART SACRIFICE
There lived once Mr Peter Pohl

Who was no doubt a great artist
He ruled the pleasures amply high and low
With his feather and paper only
Even when a bicycle he rode

He oftentimes halted the touring
Took the thoughts down there and then
Which from the mind descended on him
He kept it simply, that was a rule

Whenever a rhyme showed up to him
as if some rogue
The writing stuff from behind the lapel he took
The flow of traffic disrupting severely
What must happen that must happen

No longer he kept on to be a writer
The steering wheel left free, the ink sprayed
A little verse on a sheet of paper got torn up
And thus it came to what it should have come

So viciously the deal reached its conclusion
Far from the wheel both of the hands
He fell down, him the great thinker
What follows everyone now can guess
He pierced himself with his own feather
- 32 -
WEBCAP
The webcap is a strange creature

It seeks beyond horizon its welfare and salvation
Up to the world draws its straight hand
- 33 -
CITY AND COUNTRY
In every city there are maids

With gracefulness in front of their braids
In every city there is always someone
Who in the snout beaten
Pretty often for a maid
And for a woman sometimes
Therefore there ever live
More people down in the country
But that`s not better either
Quite an obvious thing
- 34 -
WITCH
What have I done

What have I failed to manage with
What kind of witch
Gives to this curse her breast
- 35 -
THE ARMY OF THE SORROWFUL SOULS
If you are in sorrow just like me

The tears down your face are running
Come to us and join along
Together in sorrow we want to be
Why are you standing on the edge yet

Come align with our band
When after that we march so doleful
Nothing, absolutely nothing to you can happen
The lonely dwell on their wistfulness

Come to the army of the dismal ones
There are the ugly and the fatties

The languishing in sadness are licking pills
The wounded with the knives are waving
In sorrow together it`s better to be
The league of pallid elegy

One never laughs singing in minor key
And since together we`re in sorrow

Let`s give away to pain of some child soul
When after that we start to cry
Upon this child the sun will shine
- 36 -
EARLY MASS
This
Happened in the beautiful month of May
Yet cold it was as in Siberia
My beloved soon
In church began to freeze
There she took my hand then

Looked at me and anxiously pushed
The fist right down behind my back
I asked, must it be so
Yes
Then when the blood in the hands turns warm
It flows through the whole body
And that warmth expands from there on
And over the prayer fills the heart
- 37 -
LITTLE THINGS
Little hands
Little breasts
Little man
Little apples
Little fingers
Take hold of me
- 38 -
APPLE
An apple it is to everyone well known

Tastes good
And also is very wholesome
But there`s a nasty thing about it
Too loud it sounds in the mouth while being eaten
- 39 -
AS YOUR MOTHER DIED
As your mother died

That was lovely
You saw me full of sorrow
How I like it right
Desire crept in all the veins
She has to make to hell her way
As your mother died

You kissed me then
How I like it right
Everything started turning around
She has to make her way to hell
As your mother died

You cried a lot
I took you in the arms
Loved you so holding a little later
In flesh we were united
As your mother died

That was so lovely
I`d myself for this die
Your mother then
Every day would go to hell
- 40 -
ALONE
And again the sun is rising

God`s nursery will turn red
Put a bullet into the barrel
Don`t be shy to shoot me dead
Again I`m absolutely alone

The heart`s so lonely just cannot die
I never wanted to be in life
Never wanted to have been born
Alone I am ever here

Alone I will ever be
Someone takes me as a target
For me a bullet … Catch it
- 41 -
HOW IS IT
You wander there in the wild ocean

Cannot see you night makes blind
Running back and forth along the shore
Calling out your name to the wind
Why not to come back to the shore

No one knows how much he`s frozen
Too remote is the distance you`ve sailed off
What just happened to us
I`ve lit a signal fire for you

So you could find me by it directly
It shines diligently in the night
But does not give light to my fate
The hope is bereft of strength

I`m swallowing salt and every gust of wind
Standing on the shore cold and wet
You don`t care if I die
- 42 -
PREPARATION
I have prepared something here

You
The eyes are wide with fear
I am
You are
We`re not alone
Nothing is gonna be as yesterday it was
The third one she steps out of the bath
I have prepared something here
- 43 -
SUMMER
Summer swallowed the month of May

All the worries seem to be forgotten
But unpeaceful stays a man
Just now begins the whole trouble
The sun on womens` skin is glowing

Silently in to the eyes falling
Blinding me like a fresh snow
Giving the ache to tongues and scrotum
The spring from March is descending

The hearts of women
under the sunlight are made bare
Biting the brain creeping into the veins
Ah like the sirens it`s singing
Of a desire a thousand needles

Females with hands I`d wish to capture
The buxom flesh is everywhere
Ah the knees are going queasy
Completely helpless I must behold

What they are feeding their lads like kiddies
It is an earthquake a sea rocking
And the sirens are singing
In to the loins it is already stealing

Scent of another gender tracking
Enthralling me, only of that I`m asking
And my eyes blindfolding
- 44 -
Outside the sirens are singing
I must climb out of the depths of my soul
I have just wasted my time there
The sensuality out of my ears is falling
- 45 -
BEAUTIFUL WEATHER
The weather so beautiful is outside

But I love the rain and prefer the wind
Under the sun all the people
are more kind and pleasant
So much that simply unbearable they are
- 46 -
I WAS HUNGRY
So I went to the shed and took the bow

The roebuck stood right behind the hydrangeas
and eyed us from out there mistrustfully
On a neighbour`s piece of land a children`s
birthday party was in the going and we feared
That the horned devil
because of the shouting would jump off
Waiting
We kept quiet the children too
and so he resumed the grazing
At the end of the garden the animal stopped in
silence and tested the wind so I had to steal up
to allow the possibility of a sure shot
I pulled a sharpened hunting arrowhead out
and crept across the lawn
Along with this various thoughts began passing
through my head
I urgently need a bacon so that the meat
wouldn`t get dry later in the oven
The cream for the sauce should be in the fridge
and the cranberries yeah there they`re out
Although I might borrow them from the neighbour
Venison without cranberries – no way
I drew the bow
and pulled the string to the tip of my nose
Aimed for the target
At the moment I let it fly
the voices of the kids rang out nearby
A “Happy Birthday” and the buck took off
The arrow stuck into the kidney`s zone
and remained there
- 47 -
With a scream and a hunched back rushed the goatie
Over the flower beds swept over the fence and fled
To the children`s birthday party
In our district the roe deer population

has grown in recent years enormously
The animals penetrate into the gardens
to the meadows even into the greenhouses
and the parks where they devour everything
that has a smell and color
They should not be hunted
So there are more and more of them
Shouting
The tableware went to the floor
shrieking could be heard and the voices
of women calling out the names of their children
and “Don`t touch that”
I ran to the cold store grabbed the fillet knife
and followed by two companions who also
were hungry leapt over the fence
Whereby one of the guys tore his pants
A macabre picture in front of the neighbour`s house
The buck stood with the head lowered in front
of the swimming pool and he was bleeding
Meanwhile letting out the screams
Just like a newborn baby
Some of the children stood before him crying
and stared at him
Others ran around the garden and wept loudly
and every now and then there could be heard
“Mama” and “No”
The mothers remained under the party tent and
called their offspring by names
It was impossible to make anything out in the mess
- 48 -
I climbed on some stool with the boner knife
in the hand and shouted into that mess
that no one should have any reason to worry
This was a regular hunting process
I had everything in control
and the animal would soon be released
More whining more shouting,
I crept with the steel up to the bleeding creature
to put an end to the matter
Followed by the colleague with the torn pants
through which the gray underwear could be
sighted now
I sprang at the animal`s legs to bring it to falling but
Out of the mortal fear and with all the strength left
the buck charged from where he was standing
and with a huge leap jumped between
the beach-balls and inflatable unicorns
Into the pool
With deathly gurgles and rattles
he tried to hold himself on the surface
Emitting sounds resembling those like of a sea lion
But eventually went under water
where he continued producing very slowly
the swimming movements
The children were looking at each other
The mothers screamed I had to do something
and waved with the dessert forks around
I jumped after the animal
Followed by the companion
We pulled the food out of the water, it was
very weak so I could get with the cold weapon
to its life and all ended quickly
The throes were over the screaming ceased
and the hysteria was followed by curiosity
- 49 -
The children stared at the prey
with the eyes puffy from crying but interested
what we were carrying home on our backs
The master of the house stepped out
in front of me now
He had a brightly colored apron on him
which meant “Today the chef is cooking”
and the grill tongs in his hand
He threatened powerfully with them
and that the police would come
I threatened back I had a bow and that it
would come for him in return and the kids
with the police wouldn`t be able to do anything
A little later we had eaten
He didn`t have any cranberries left
Didn`t want to ask the neighbour
The next door it became quiet
and we haven`t been any more hungry
- 50 -
ALL THE ANIMALS WANDER
And sometimes in the mouth

The plants are keeping friendly
In the earth deep grounded
Vegetables are healthy
All the animals wander

We take in deer and cow
And then commence to singing
But no one listens to us

All the big and small
Walk right in to the mouth
They must be chewed then properly
So that they wouldn`t make off

It`s meant to be it must be so
There`s no need indeed in being sad
Yet all the plants stay where they stand
They`re not intended for the opposite

Can it be said what one wants
Resound they and burst with sparkles then
Yet people silently of plants sing songs
- 51 -
You must not do it, there is at all no need
With harps and with flutes
No thou shalt not kill
People little calves consume

The lion feeds on gnu
And all continue singing
But no one here listens to it
- 52 -
FAREWELL TO A BELOVED ANIMAL
And Christmas again already

How fast the time flies
We took him to the bathroom

He didn`t look good anymore
and somehow we felt sorry for him
You spend time with the creature
Get used to it
Especially the children
I tried to console said he was old
We laid him into the bathtub
and I let some water run
The daughter began to cry
I tried to console said he liked water
The woman shook her head and said I should finally
bring it to an end, the animal was in torment
Besides she couldn`t allow herself the time
of the whole day
The silverware should be made clean
and the dirt would come soon
After all everything had to be prepared
I got a meat mallet, both of the children wailed
I tried to console said it`s better for him
I hit once
Heavily
The sound was as if someone stepped on an egg
No blood, shuddering,
so I slashed from the ass to the neck
Ripped everything out
- 53 -
A huge mess a jerk and a gurgle
The children screamed and then suddenly
Quiet
It was over after one sob
and two rolls of paper towels
I chopped the bloodless body up
The rest was a routine
The father was being watched closely already
The woman also knew her way around
Boiling and salt had to be added
During the meal though more words
and all well again
The lad said he liked it
and didn`t feel anymore sorry
The daughter was laughing tearfully
Full cheeks and smacking
The woman stroked the both on their heads
I let myself be taken away by thoughts
I do not want a dog anymore
- 54 -
IN A MIRE
In moor in moor in the haze of a mire

A naked man is standing
Amor Amor
So Spanish seems resounding to me
What is the naked man doing
In moor in mud
He`s looking for Amor in moor
So without the clothes in gloomy melancholy
Since he cannot find it
He`s deeply discontented
Love is brooding in morass

It felt the naked man`s scent straight away
Moves to the live skin hastily
The man is in despair and embittered
Has lost the solid ground
Furiously bent the body
Wants to get bitten by her
Love out of the swamp is creeping
Don`t look for it

Watch out
For while the man is at her and holds on to it
Love to the bottom can go down
- 55 -
YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW
You do not want to know

What I think
I stand in front of you
And you`re resplendent
So I wince confused
And somehow
Into your eyes I cannot look
You should not know

What I think
Either
When I am lavish with attention
So beautiful your face is
But what I actually think of
Stays unrevealed to you
- 56 -
CELLO
In the opera house`s toilet room

She wouldn`t spare soap
Plucks out the wild hairs of hers
Her charms to perfection perfumes
The crowd screams

The cello freezes
The hair removal is very successful
Confused for a little bit
Yet diligently again the screaming opens
And impels the instrument to mating
The strings start itching
She is to raise the thigh up soon
Along the curves the fingers flit
A drop of sweat
It is completely quiet in the concert hall
Her scent can be smelled
- 57 -
EXPRESSION
Women can be made so happy

If you give them skin to play with
A couple of pores to press
Makes ladies with delight squint
Slobber uncontrollably in ecstasy
When fingernails are there in the skin
And the pus is in rivers flowing
Black papules are loudly breaking
Followed by a faint moan
Now with lust is being chewed the lip
Yes they can be with that spoiled
- 58 -
AS ALWAYS
Something lifted me up
It felt
Like I was flying
Saw myself suddenly from the above
That was beautiful
And gone fast
Just as always
It is not beautiful
- 59 -
THIS I KNOW
I know the sun

The sun does not know me
Getting hot when it shines
My face burns
This I know
I know the bunny

The bunny knows nothing
The dog seized the head
The rest on the table is left
This I know
I know the father

Father also knows me
He kicks the mother
Beats on the back and in belly
This I know
I know people
Already you know them too
They destroy themselves
And fly to the Moon
This I know
- 60 -
LONELINESS AGAIN
I don`t want to go into the house

It`s dreadful to sleep at home
Don`t want to stay alone
A vessel without harbour
Weariness drives me
Into my dismal dwelling
All of the panes I make open
Don`t want to be shut in
The nightly chill will soon compel me

Windows to close
From loneliness it`s going to be cold now
Want myself with a fuel to douse
Loneliness takes me in the arms

Ever it`s pressing more severely
Like a little monkey enclosed by a serpent
I will be stifled
- 61 -
FEAST
I could relish feasting on you

You smell and taste so wonderful
Ah I could devour you
A pity only
There`d be left of you then nothing
- 62 -
QUESTIONS OVER QUESTIONS
I`d want to ask you something

Do you know why stars
Have rays
I do not know this
Sometimes
They`re round
As tiny little pearls
I do not want to know it either

All these questions
Are too profound too
Engrossing
I`m staying ignorant, can only mention
The little stars that are beheld in heavens
Just what they are
Simply beautiful
To look at them
- 63 -
ON THE LEASH
Have you ever

Thought
How would it have been
To live without love
Without these bonds
Of soul
That run around the heart like dog
How free the body would have been
How open spirit
Other way to breathe
Unfortunately no
On the leash we all are running
- 64 -
BLOSSOM
The cherries blossom on the branches

White tulle has kissed the wood
So the spring is revealing itself
In our breasts with cheerfulness blow
Warm days
Cold night
Has plucked from frost the splendor of the flowering
Beating the head against the wall

It`s been a long while since I was in bloom
- 65 -
WHEN YOU SLEEP
Willingly I sleep with you when you`re asleep

When you`re entirely beyond control of yourself
The mouth is open
The eyes are closed
The whole body is in peace
Can everywhere touch you
Can let myself be absolutely free
Sleep willingly with you when you`re in dreams
For you miss everything what`s here happening
And so exactly it should be
(so it should be, it makes the funny treat)
Somewhat of Rohypnol in wine
(somewhat of Rohypnol in wine glass)
You are no longer capable of moving
And you`re asleep
This is a blessing
- 66 -
OVER
Dear friend let me relate this to you

Evil heartache intends to torture me
Cannot find my way in what is going on
She is alright and I feel awfully
I lie down and then get up

Through the stomach rats are running
Start to walk yet remain standing still
Wide open eyes don`t want to see anything
Dear friend I would delude you

If I were not by fear inspired
But I order myself to be courageous
When my beloved knife guides me
So naked and without heart I`m standing

Yesterday she wanted to miss me out
Love affairs all with the roots eliminated
My life has torn out from me
In shards and ruins now it`s lying

You are still here yet gone already
Everything, everything is breaking
Don`t know when it has had the beginning
The seconds as if a whip are striking

Thinking of you to the rhythm of the pulse in veins
It must have been love I thought
But it wasn`t the thing
- 67 -
CHEERFUL
I am friendly
I greet people
Interested in life
Have no fear any more
By the hand I take grief
And raise the dark clouds up
When happiness and fortune

are down at the bottom
I pick them up again
And meanwhile must be laughing
- 68 -
ALIPED
A bat from pigeon loft

Feeds on fat mosquitos
Because of an insect croaks
Must have choked
I pick it up
Good to savour it was
- 69 -
YOU AND YOUR GARDEN
Heinz and Jutta were a couple

And possessed a garden
With a bourgeois bench
Where now and then they sat serenely
They were always seen together

Among the fruit trees and the ground harvests
But most of their lifetime
For roses they indulged in having passion
The tender thorn-flesh there could be seen

So late as in the morning
And all the people came to standing still
And envious felt of this blooming
Heinz and Jutta what a couple

And yet before death you are separating
Together for so many years already
In the end one`s feeling painful
How life its jokes sometimes is making

Crazily hormones are playing
After a green vegetable a glance Heinz stole
And picked it up then evidently
Jutta screamed among vine trellis

I saw only where the car was parked
Vanishing from the garden here
Unable though to avoid running over a rake
- 70 -
Ah how many a heart broken
So many a love went to pieces splintered
The morale of this story
The blossoming of roses just continues
- 71 -
DANCE BAR
Upright the women hold their men

Because they themselves can no longer stand
- 72 -
VACATION IN THE COUNTRY
Whether summer or a wakeful coma

The vacations are
With grandma we are
Whether winter
or a drop of white mischievous protein
Out in the country and again
There are Puchs deep in the memory
The grandpapa`s woman is pretty

He himself eagerly the holy fuck busts of the bed
The country man went wild
Fought with a crutch stick
Then
Got with a billy goat caught
And then
Got with a cousin caught and oh
Into the scuffle the veteran has plunged
At the risk of being

Dull and dumb
Vacation`s in the country
- 73 -
ERFURT
My father had a rifle

He would have still be living
But had he been alive
He wouldn`t have given it to me
Also my mother is already dead

She`d still have kept her life
But had she been alive
She would have had aborted me
And my companion fellows

Jeez they are gone beyond the other side
The children and the teacher too
I shot them all in stomach
The gun smoke is dissolving

A moan and a whimpering
Immersed into a dreary song
An angel in the classroom`s singing
The barrel in my throat deep is set

Another life after this life offering
My father had a rifle
Had it to the little angel given
- 74 -
UNDER PRESSURE
I am under pressure
For days
Cannot bear you any longer
You lay on me
So heavy
Do not get up anymore
Are you already dead
Or are you just not anymore among the living
- 75 -
FIST
Fist-right
Fist-blow Fist-fight
By fist Fist-fuck
Fist-stuff …
With the fingers one can break

But with the hand – No
Be just angry
Beat the fist against the wall
- 76 -
I AM A FALSE BUTTERFLY
Outside I`m bitter-colored

Yet jet-black is my soul
The red receives the morning dew
The poison-green is for the sea
For animals the deep rich blue
The black I never let go
I let no colors go
That I steal from human beings
I suck them out of their eyes
And chain them up in my soul
- 77 -
AIDS
He was a pilot
For one night
He flew off far and got lost
He is dead now
- 78 -
ON SUNDAY I SHOULD DIE
On Sunday I am meant to die

But I will spoil it botch it up
I`m going to get sick, you`ll see
Cannot take leave to death like this
- 79 -
HEAD HIGH
I`d want to smell this willingly

I said
So do it she said but be careful
I drew my nose over the book cover
The paper smelled of vomit
We opened the book
and looked in on the railway station
The train arrival was being delayed

Had in fervor from the bridge fallen down
otherwise it would have come in time already
So we were told
Every day it drove from that far over there uphill
to the point of exhaustion and it must have
come about
Suggested one Chinese
The bridge was capricious
The train was too tired the engine driver
in a poor condition the rails from Greenland
Laziness betides and there it happens so
He meant, that Chinese
We returned back to the railway station hall

Train obligation
Pulled the drinks and the Rolex out
from the automatic machine for me and her and
For the travelling and waited
At railway stations there are many people
who never take leave
- 80 -
They drink beer and keep tapeworms within
with which they shit
Have papules on the faces
Many of them are extremely dirty
Others are admirers of the old fashions but
All of them possess that certain smell
It is not known what they are doing there
Actively busy
Know the timetable and talk to each other
when they come together
Run restlessly here and there
Like on a stock market
Now and again some of them get arrested
so that the brassiness from those ones falls off
I went to a railway station toilet on the platform 8

But I am not able to recount of it
The train arrived and I felt good again

Washed the hands well
We said Goodbye to each other and I climbed in
There was tea and Mikado for all
I took a handkerchief with edelweiss
out from my belt pouch
And waved with it
Something crept up my leg
- 81 -
HEAD HIGH 2
I saw the face and recoiled

So ugly
I hate the mirror
How can Nature be so ungainly

How can God be so blind
I don`t believe that thence I`m not a believer
The God is Nature
Nature is God and Nature said No
Oh can`t anyone see
Beyond my misfeatures
A fair heart whispers
Ah take me wild wind
From the ocean of my genus`s flesh
That none of the ships has yet sailed in
God
Touch me
Spew out your cascades
On my face
Then I will pray to you
God
Make me beautiful
I will oil the Bible
Lick the crosses
My soul
Is a gift to you
For a little bit of charm on my unsightly visage
So you might be of use to me
in pleasures for my senses
- 82 -
So I could seduce the splendid
The nymphs
Who touch those of their own kind only
So give me them
And forgive me
Then
I desire all of them
- 83 -
HEAD HIGH 3
I waved long
My handkerchief got dry again
The window was still open
I closed my eyes
and let the airstream blow through my hair
Smelled the diesel
The shoulder ached
Then I stared for a moment at my shoes
Thought about father
Long haven`t seen him, I thought
Too soon he passed away
From cancer
Outside the riding lancers
speared in the heads each other
One of the riders
acquired for himself a gorgeous skull
He pulled his horse around in triumph
The dun obeyed maneuver badly
Went with the foreleg down
The valiant fellow came forward
The lance swung violently
And the head flew towards me
Through the compartment window
I caught it
It thanked me and asked if I had already eaten today
Then closed its eyes and said no more
I am a good eater
My stomach started growling like a dog on chain
So I went to a restaurant carriage
Funny people are these lancers
- 84 -
TOILET
At the wish of her, one of the readers,

I cannot help it
The incident at the railway station toilet
is truthful to recount
But for every sensitive citizen there`s a forewarning
this chapter to skip
The shit-house was found located

at the end of the railway platform underpass
I squeezed on the way past two of the specimens
with the motherfucking beards
They smelled of mustard and asked for small change
There was no need in the door handle to press
There was none anymore
I pushed the door open and recoiled
The stench bet
Never before have I breathed anything like this in
The door slammed shut and it became dark,
I wanted to open the top-light window
to call for help
Then remembered both of the spongers outside
I took my lighter out of the pocket and searched for
A light-switch
There was none
Probably outside
Apparently there was no moisture-proof switch
or anything like that
The two of those were standing in front
of the door forever I heard them grunting
I had the light and the stench didn`t seem
so unbearable anymore
- 85 -
There were three urine bowls one of which broken
The others
Half-filled in the second a ladies` handbag floating
I considered what the daily average of a pickpocket
must be and whether I too
Should try
I was near the seat boxes
The first shack locked
Went to the next one in anxious anticipation
Breakfast being on the advance
I hoped that nobody would come in now and see me
in the searching-for-treasure position
There was a basin full up to the brim
even though the flush seemed to be functioning
It splashed like an oily stream
I cast a quick look at everything around
with an expert eye although without taking
any deeper gaze
After all, with light
Took off my coat holding the fire
first in the left hand and then in the right one
There were no hooks so I tossed it over the door
Fingered the belt one-handedly
and let my trousers down
Making sure that the trouser fabric
did not touch the floor
Who knew what viruses and germs it was
covered with and the textile would be spoiled
Piss spray everywhere for certain
The horror stories of the parasite hosts
Lowered the dear flame down and looked around
Probably no one had come in here for days
Everything was dry
A couple of cigarette butts
some vomit and half a sausage
- 86 -
Around
On the walls the usual slogans were smeared
Who the hell while taking a shit-time would draw
a felt-tip pen (who would have a felt-tip pen
about themselves at all) out of the jacket
and scribble on the chipboard Cunts and Cocks
and also phone numbers
Which must have been thought up first
Or recalled from an antediluvian meeting
In public in some city park
Suddenly there it was
My sun in the night
Barely touched
a large white one emerged from the darkness
Wrapped in fifty-six meters of hymen
The Holy Virgin from the inferno
A toilet paper roll
Everything would have been fine,
the lighter was getting hot
I took one step forward only one
so I could get back into the same position
And not miss the deal
Pulled the coat closer to me
and put the lighter into the pocket
Taking a step back I crouched down (sitting
there was out of the question) and let myself
Relax, let myself having a good time
The parts of muscles that are attached

to the cruciate ligaments in the thighs
They have the only function
to support the knee joints and are not
Used to bearing weight for long
They hurt
I had to hurry
- 87 -
I decided to wipe myself in the darkness
nothing could go wrong, a good roll of paper
Was within the reach and the rest was a routine
I unrolled two decent meters and out of six layers
of it formed as always a little solid mat
A fortress for the fingers
Whilst turning backwards
I got caught with the automatic Rolex
By the belt flap, the bracelet tore
and the watch fell from my wrist
Made a sound
as if a filet when onto the kitchen floor falling
I dropped the wad of paper and got up
Felt for the coat to search for the lighter
found the side-pocket
And grasped a hornet nest
The Zippo burned the fingers
Staggering from pain
I sought in the darkness for a hold
My range of movement was extremely limited
with the trousers down
I lost my footing but managed while falling
to correct the failure so that only with the
Shoulder hit the edge of the closet bowl
and between
The shit-basin and the partition wall
came to the floor on the puke-free side
Heard a crack as if
trouser braces against the bare skin snapped
Cursing and shuddering I got on to my feet back
Down there the disgust kissed me
I hitched quickly my pants up
forgot about the wiping paper and the disgrace
Just wanted to check for the Rolex and then
get out of there
- 88 -
I pulled the sweater hem over my fingers
found the coat and
Grasped the lighter
I blew as if it were a chicken broth
And now igniting
Light
The impact with my shoulder
had a bolt out of the anchoring of the
Ceramic base torn
the potty hung on its edge like a capsized boat
The other bolt was half out and bent
Preventing although the white dream
from overturning completely
A considerable part of its contents was on the tiles
and spreading around
With one foot I stood in the feces
I did not catch any sight of the watch,
surely it swam away into the next cell
I rushed out of the latrine
Stomping the shit off my shoe
There were masses of it sticking to the leather
The socks damp
The lighter hot again
I hurried to the washbasin and put the lighter
into an empty soap trough
Raised my foot under the water tap
I turned it with fright
Water came
The jet was thin as a knitting needle
it would take forever
Until only partially it could be cleaned up
Besides I had an insistent fear
that someone might come in and the police
Would call
- 89 -
The disaster was huge and the hurry urgent
I pulled the kicks off and threw the socks away
in the direction of the latrine
Then fumbled carefully for a handkerchief with
the edelweiss embroidery in my trouser pocket
I dipped the shoe into the piss bowl
where there was no handbag and
With the handkerchief wiped the remnants
of the excrements as well as the twilight
made it possible
(The gasoline was running low)
and put the shoe back on
Then I wrung the handkerchief
stuffed it after that hurry-skurry into the shoe
And went back to the washbasin
Washed my hands without soap,
there was none as mentioned already and found
The light-switch next to the hand dryer
but did not dare test it
The two bums were gone
You`ve been long though she said
I nodded and the train was announced
I forgot the lighter
- 90 -
CONSOLATION
For animals the big and small there`s a blessing

When outside the wind and weather rage
A huntsman keeps the distance from the forest
Reposes at the hearth, feeds on tinned meat
And indulges himself
in taking care of his private treasures
- 91 -
MOURNING
I wear a black band on the arm

Should not adorn myself
Hold myself warm
Have to continue crying
It bears evidence to people and as well to animals
Of grief on long legs
- 92 -
CANDLE
The sand is burning in my eyes

Benzin is dripping out of hers
The match my hand lets falling
- 93 -
FOG
When the fog is rising from the meadows

I cut my skin open
Two lines of reticle below the collarbone
Guide the polished steel in
I carve my eyes out

The house is without windows
Break prettily my skull open
It snows then and my brain gets frozen
I hack my breast out for amusement

It rains and my heart turns all wet
Open my thick veins
Give you of red tears a bouquet
I cut myself as if a leaf of paper

Each day a bit by bit
These parts of mine lay on your forehead
Submerge them into your brain
Until I am so little and so lightweight tiny
I will collect then myself in your body
I`ll rise out of your breast

And find a way to get my view around
Through your lips I need to crawl
Can kiss your tongue
- 94 -
The mole on your leg
Shall be my island haven
A little scar – my nest of bed
Tight to your little hairs I hold
When you are pulling on the pale clothes
And cry when you are reading fairytales
- 95 -
RED EAR
Behind your ear blushing red

There is a black vault made of skin enthroned
Just close to your hairline
A big wart
A little treasure
I cut it open
Let the contents fly
The evil in the world thus will be vanquished
- 96 -
HEART-ROBBING
What have you done to me

Like a robber in the night
You break into my soul
And want to steal my life
Come take my heart take it captive
Anyway it`s been forlorn
In the end I have been carelessly guarded
I`m giving readily my heart away
Lay it on your laps gently
But hold it precious
I ask you so
- 97 -
DON`T TURN ROUND
I have brought animals for you

From the meadow`s wet edges
You know what ah you know what
Where to find for them the fetters
Sing for me come sing

The kitten is holding the ring
Dance for me come dance
The puppy is wagging the tail end
Don`t be afraid
Don`t be afraid of me
Don`t turn round
I stand behind you
Turn yourself
Around me
Turn yourself turn yourself turn yourself
However don`t turn round
They come again in the night

Creep out of the hearth`s hole
Animals that we aroused
They scream then they begin to burn
Sing for me come sing

The kitten is holding the ring
Dance for me come dance
- 98 -
THE PUPPY IS WAGGING THE TAIL END
Don`t be afraid
Don`t be afraid of me
Don`t turn round
I stand behind you
Turn yourself
Around me
Turn yourself turn yourself turn yourself
However don`t turn round
- 99 -
GOOD NIGHT
Again the day comes to an end

Light and darkness
Hold out to each other hands
Again I have done nothing
Do not care
Will do it tomorrow then
Good night
- 100 -
PITY FROM THE SOUL
I let the baby fall

Not long it twitched
Of blood one droplet
One little tear by the daddy shed
Into flokati straight
Pity from the soul
The child is still alive
The mother must get sick
From grief with all her body and the soul
Good luck
And farewell
For it
- 101 -
AH SO WILLINGLY
I knew many beautiful women

In this admirable world
With full right truthfully it can be said here
I was a bona fide lover bird
They say behind me, I am shameless
So heartless loveless and frivolous
They think, I must have forced them … no
The truth somewhere in between belongs
Then ah so willingly I kissed the women
And not only on their mouths
I always wanted to know how it was
And kissed until it felt on my lips painful
I kissed not only the red cheeks

I simply loved everything
They say, I waste away from lustfulness
Obsessed with the fervour for mating
They thought, I must have deeply fallen
Into the sea of libido
They say, I waste away from lustfulness
It can be seen this way or differently

I took them simply in my arms
And many whispered softly “No”
But of mercifulness I knew nothing
In the end they should`ve been of it regretful
- 102 -
So like a rabbit before a snake
A cold glance, then I took the bite
And the poison called for passion
No longer leaving me at peace
Ah the women, all of them so faithful
And many a heart in two were broken
In the end they should`ve been of it regretful
So many shouts and tears

I took them simply in my arms
And many whispered softly “No”
But of mercifulness I knew nothing
So that they could be happy
- 103 -
DEEPER CAN`T GO
Deeper goes
Deeper can`t go
Deeper can`t go any more
Deeper can`t go any more falling
Only staggering and slurring
Deeper cannot I any more sink

Any further cannot I any more drink
Any further cannot I any more snuff it up
Cold sweat off the head wipe
And owing to this stupid cunt
I almost choke on that vomitous stuff of mine
I don`t show to anyone how it goes for me

Don`t reveal to anyone how bad I feel
The tears in streams are flowing
I don`t show it to anyone, ever laugh only
- 104 -
SHORT LIFE
So short life is
The sun should be there forever
It comes up
And comes down
You come then
Comes nothing too much anymore there
- 105 -
YESTERDAY
Is dead
Today is withering wasted
Tomorrow
I don`t give a shit for it
- 106 -
BRINGER
He brings her to laughing

He brings her wine
Already rum he`s bringing
He`ll bring her home soon after that
And will bring her to crying
Then he`ll bring her to death
- 107 -
STAY
Quietly it rests in my arms

What I cannot leave
With wild kisses besmeared
My good old pillow
- 108 -
BANANA
Everyone loves them bananas

Dogs not so much the children better
Everyone does love bananas
The monkeys and the women greatly
- 109 -
BALLET
And then she`s dancing in the air

And then she`s spreading her legs apart
And I am catching her scent
And softly the tears begin to run
- 110 -
PURE PLEASURE
Do not want any pleasures anymore

Unless the only one – to love you
To love you, know about this
My one and only pleasure that there is
- 111 -
CUTTER
A maiden who cuts herself

Her own veins with blades opens
Will be then, it is well known
As the cutter garment-maker looked on
Lady cutter oh cut maker

Let your blood within your body stay
You should not open your veins
Believe me
The better times will come yet
A lad who cuts himself

His own veins with blades opens
Will be then, it is well known
As the utter idiot looked on
Bloodletting perhaps makes a deal of sense

Blood to the brain flows
Take the hands off the face
And look at yourself
The better times will not come anyway
- 112 -
DEATH THROUGH ANIMALS
It happens so
That a human
Through animals
Comes to life
This is terrible and brutal
However
The human beings who die
From a huge pain oftentimes suffer
Because the animals
When seize them
While killing
Allow themselves having good deals of time
Thus I hope
That into the water and the ground
Not from the animals will go destroyed
- 113 -
LION
Near by a lion with the big mane

Hungrily hyena`s waiting
Waiting diligently because she then
The remains of his feast can eat up
- 114 -
LAUGHING IS HEALTHY
There is a hole in the face

This is a mouth with which a man speaks
A man can also other things
Do with it
With the mouth a man can laugh as well
There is a hole this is the mouth

Laughing
Laughing is healthy
This is the hole in the face
Laugh of course
Never laugh the animals
How well it goes for animals

They walk on all fours
No one ever asks anything of them
They do not need to talk at all
You can make up so many jests and jokes though
Just gonna laugh in no way
- 115 -
SECOND
I thank myself
For my good deeds
Also when they do not
Do good to all and everyone
I thank myself
For my creations
No one can
Create anything like this
For it is well known

I am running a race
All over again and again
But at some point I noticed
It is not possible to ever be the first
Sometimes you must be second
To be the second one is pretty fine as well
- 116 -
SHORT
Short end
Short life
Brief pause
Quick death
Fast game
And shortly a little of light
Short process
But regretfully
Regretfully nothing again
Short penis, so much regret

Short pants, wood-made shotgun
- 117 -
SMALL SPOON BIG STOMACH
I reckoned it was bigger

But it was just quite small
I wanted to say so much
But not a thing came to the thought
The magic spell won`t make it better
Through aid of some great staff
What is the big spoon`s benefit
When there`s none of soup I have
- 118 -
NOW YOU ARE DEAD
Now you are dead

I live further on
Nothingness
From now on is your companion
The one dies the other lives
O that sounds fair to me
I have just appeared

To watch you being buried
And some fellow in a godforsaken hole
Like a jerk behaves
God rest his soul awfully he screams
Now you are dead
Alive no more
I live further on
There they stand now depressed gravely
The widow is my companion
Having just been fucked
Wails arduously in the mourning garb
Ah the dismay governs
Well you are dead
I am not sorry
- 119 -
YOU
Wish I`d be you

It would be nice for me
The whole day long
Could spend with my own titties playing
No more stealing looks
None of defects
No more the dust to lick off plates
To hell it with my load of brood
In grammar I`d be perfect good
And also rich
Beautiful
At whim
Would go to work
I`d then engage myself in art culture
My bidet would never be in shit
Wish I`d be you
Day and night
And when your man
No longer does it right for you
I`d sleep with collie then
So what the hell
Some go with sheep
But I`m ok with mine
Although the swine
Besotted falls on me asleep
And whilst we are at it
Wish I`d be you
Also your kid
The pigtails I`d do every day for him
And answer fast his every question
- 120 -
Yeah the brat would go tiptop with me
Instead of beating simply beer
They say it`s dangerous
Such rubbish, let`s be clear
In any case it did no harm to me
At twelve already bathed in Schnapps
Only my father had disgraced me
Well I haven`t burdened myself
Sure everyone`s in lust for something
Am still alive
Thank god
But find myself somewhat repulsive
I`d wish so much to be like you
Yet I observe it somehow
What a pity, in no way could ever I become you
- 121 -
SOMEHOW
Somehow it shall work out well

But somehow it is not well looking
Life never bestirred to give its thanks
Is it so much for them to expect
You just have to go forward
With the eyes into abyss set
And see how you would thank me
Yeah this is for the fear retribution and reward
On the mount I am staying safely
Watching you dying down there below
- 122 -
COFFEE
I drink a lot of coffee

It tastes good to me
And keeps me awake
When the sun goes down
Then
I drink coffee
With lots of milk
And sugar
It stirs me up
And when it`s going darker
Then
Completely I am roused
And then I`m fucking
- 123 -
GENTLE VOICE
Send me please a couple of syllables

Would like to beseech you very much
It`s not too great a thing to ask for and wait
Ah the beautiful mouth
Only once for an instant
your tender voice resounded
Standing in fire without skin

I`d wish your gentle voice to feel
Your words could become a balm
My torn heart to bathe in
When the tears ride me at nights

The meat of flesh is bare everywhere
The words you say take all
All of the fear`s seeds away with them
- 124 -
SECOND SKIN
You are
My second skin
Always here
Nearby
Ultimately near
I breathe through you
Feel your scent
Wet
You are my second blood
And it`s burning
- 125 -
YOU WILL DIE FAST
You drink
You smoke
And you take drugs
Constantly deceived your woman, was unfaithful
You are repulsive live unhealthy life
Before your time you`re gonna go to bottom
You drink
You smoke
You take drugs
With all the women only ever was untruthful
Your lifestyle, who`s at that surprised
Is disgusting and with manners rough
Before your time you`re gonna bite the dust
- 126 -
ANNOTATIONS TO THE POEMS
P. 19. THE GUILT IS ALWAYS MINE
The lines about sparrows and doves – “Hab keine

Spatzen in der Hand / Keine Tauben auf dem Dach”
(in the original) – relate to the saying: “Besser ein Spatz
in der Hand als eine Taube auf dem Dach,” meaning:
“Better a sparrow in the hand than a dove on the roof.”
Its English equivalent would be: “A bird in the hand is
worth two in the bush.”
P. 22. LEACKING
The poem`s name in translation is the compilation

of words “Licking” and “Leakage”. Its original name is
“Lecken”, which means “leakage” (noun) or “(have a) leak”
(intr. verb), and also “lick (up)”, “perform oral sex” (verb).
Hence the rendition.
P. 26. ARMLESS BEAR
The key to the poem`s message is in the word

“Arm” (Armer Bär (original poem`s name), Arme Kind).
Along with defining “arms” as parts of the body (noun),
it also includes the following meanings: “unfortunate,
unlucky, miserable, unhappy, poor” and “armless, helpless,
defenseless, incapable to protect oneself” (adj.).
- 127 -
P. 27. DEATH DANCE
The first line in the second strophe – “Die Eier rollen

aus dem Nest” (in the original) – if not solely a depiction
of a real action or a reference to something else, then
obviously suggests a metaphorical context. This image
with the eggs may relate, in general, to something going
out of its usual order of state, out of control, etc. – similar
to the real eggs when they roll out in different directions
and are hard then to catch to collect back again.
And there`s also this phrase for more of the possible
interpretations to consider: “ein Ei ins Nest legen” (“put
an egg in the nest”), which takes its origin from a cuckoo`s
habit of laying its eggs in other birds` nests so they would
raise afterwards alien children. The idiom`s meaning is
that of playing a dirty trick on someone, doing something
harmful, including that which comes through making an
error or a blunder.
P. 33. WEBCAP
Webcap is the common name for mushrooms of

the Cortinarius genus. Some of its species are dangerously
toxic for a human, although the edible ones do exist too,
and gastronomically they are appreciated. Since it is
difficult to distinguish between the species, the non-expert
consumption of these mushrooms is not recommended.
P. 36. THE ARMY OF THE SORROWFUL SOULS
Weil wir zusammen traurig sind

Schenken wir dem Schmerz ein Kind
- 128 -
Wenn wir dann zusammen weinen
Dem Kinde wird die Sonne scheinen
In this poem`s last strophe, the thing about “ein Kind”

is evidently not only about some “child, kid”, as this
word indicates by its literal meaning in German, but the
notion of it might also be understood rather figuratively –
referring to any human soul, regardless of age, and
extending thus the borders of this strophe`s meaning.
P. 51. ALL THE ANIMALS WANDER
The sixth strophe`s last expression – “Du sollst nicht

töten” (in the original) – is precisely one of the biblical Ten
Commandments.
P. 55. IN A MIRE
The poem`s name in the original is “Am Moor”.

The phonetic alikeness of its key words together with their
semantic affinity is remarkable.
German “Moor” (noun) – it is a moorland, fenland,
swampland, bog, marsh; and also it is a place from the
ancient times regarded to be a source of mysterious, magic
spells – enchantments, mirages, mystical hallucinations
and illusions – aiming more often than not to drive the
one who happened to fall into its snares to perishing …
“Amor” in the Spanish language is “love, love affairs”,
and as well – Cupid/Eros, the deity of Love himself from
the ancient Roman and Greek mythology. The languages
of the West Germanic branch have preserved their own
equivalents of this word too – “die Amouren” (German, pl.
noun), “amour, amours” (Engl., sg. & pl. noun) – although
both of these are used to address love rather ironically
- 129 -
than seriously; Amor as the divinity (Cupid/Eros) in
German and in English retains this version of his name
as the Latin original one.
So, the nature of the magic spells of love, from the
linguistic point of view, seems to provide quite a profound
basis to associate them with the hazardous enchantments
of such places as mires, moors, swamps, and marshes …
And finally, the fourth line of the poem – “Das
kommt mir spanisch vor” (in the original) – is an idiomatic
expression too, implying that a certain thing or a situation
is strange, confused, isn`t in reality as it seems. “Something
is off or fishy” matches here as its English equal.
P. 60. THIS I KNOW
The lines about the bunny – “Ich kenne das Häschen

/ Das Häschen weiß nichts” (in the original) – relate to
the saying: “Mein Name ist Hase(, ich weiß von nichts),”
literally meaning: “My name is Rabbit(, I know about
nothing),” or in other words: “I don`t know anything about
anything,” referring to the unwillingness to be interested
in something or get involved.
P. 73. VACATION IN THE COUNTRY
Puch – an Austrian manufacturing company founded

in 1899 by the industrialist Johann Puch. A subsidiary of
the large Steyr-Daimler-Puch conglomerate, it produced
automobiles, bicycles, mopeds, and motorcycles. Puch
was well known in the beginning and to the middle of
the XX century, yet down to the late 1980s, as a result
of squeezing out by the market competition, its popularity
had almost entirely remained only in memory.
- 130 -
P. 76. FIST
The third line of this poem`s first strophe – “Faustan

Faustfick” – could be understood somewhat ambiguously.
In pharmacology, Faustan is the trade name
for diazepam – a chemical agent acting as an anxiolytic,
hypnotic, psychotropic, tranquillizer. It is commonly used
to treat insomnia, anxiety, panic attacks, psycho-somatic,
neurotic and psycho-neurotic disorders, convulsions and
seizures, to relieve muscle tone and muscle spasms, and
in some others cases. It may also be used to cause memory
loss during certain medical procedures. Common side
effects include sleepiness, dizziness, and troubles with
coordination.
P. 98 & 99. DON`T TURN ROUND &

THE PUPPY IS WAGGING THE TAIL END
Tail – “Schwanz” in the original, this word is used

to address various kinds of tail ends. Playing with the
meanings of these poems` other words are at the pleasure
of the inquisitive reader`s imagination.
P. 101. PITY FROM THE SOUL
The name of the poem in the original is “Mitleid

und Seele”. This same expression is also used to describe
the feelings of the baby`s father as the storyline develops.
The mother`s feelings are: “Mutter muss sich übergeben /
Mit Leid und Seele.”
“Mitleid” (noun) stands for “pity, compassion,
condolence, regret, sadness, understanding”; “Leid” (noun)
– “sorrow, woe, grief, pain, distress, calamity”. And there is
- 131 -
also this expression in the German language: “Mit Leib und
Seele” – “with all the heart (literally: body) and soul”.
So the edge of the tone created by those particularities
of the feelings that each of the parents is having towards
the baby shows through the phonetic nuances of these
phrases combined with their semantic essence.
P. 107. BRINGER
The lexical core of this poem is in the words “Bringer”

(noun, the poem`s name) and “bringen” (verb, within
the verse), with the verb meaning, accordingly, “bring”
in English.
P. 109. BANANA
There is also a common expression: “Alles Banane!”

meaning “Everything is bananas!” or “Everything is
fine/cool!” … With a bit of irony, perhaps, depending on
the context of the situation.
P. 117. SHORT
The matter of this poem is bound to the word “kurz” –

“short(ly), brief(ly), quick(ly), fast” (adj. and adv.), to be
short …
- 132 -
CONTENTS
From the Translator * 3

Foreword from Alexander Gorkow 5
Music * * 9
At the Seashore * * 10
Captain * * 11
Money * * 12
Mine * * 13
Quiet * * 14
Ruffian * * 15
Leisure Time * * 16
And They`re Calling Me * 17
Heartless * * 18
The Guilt Is Always Mine * 19
Mail * * 20
Chain * * 21
Leacking * * 22
I Talk * * 23
Highway * * 24
Ingratitude * * 25
Armless Bear * * 26
Death Dance * * 27
Unrequired Property * 29
Complete Loss * * 30
Love * * 31
Art Sacrifice * * 32
Webcap * * 33
City and Country * 34
Witch * * 35
The Army of the Sorrowful Souls 36
Early Mass * * 37
- 133 -
Little Things * * 38
Apple * * 39
When Your Mother Died * 40
Alone * * 41
How Is It * * 42
Preparation * * 43
Summer * * 44
Beautiful Weather * 46
I Was Hungry * * 47
All the Animals Wander * 51
Farewell to a Beloved Animal 53
In a Mire * * 55
You Do Not Want to Know * 56
Cello * * 57
Expression * * 58
As Always * * 59
This I Know * * 60
Loneliness Again * 61
Feast * * 62
Questions over Questions * 63
On the Leash * * 64
Blossom * * 65
When You Sleep * * 66
Over * * 67
Cheerful * * 68
Aliped * * 69
You and Your Garden * 70
Dance Bar * * 72
Vacation in the Country * 73
Erfurt * * 74
Under Pressure * * 75
Fist * * 76
I am a False Butterfly * 77
AIDS * * 78
On Sunday I Should Die * 79
Head High * * 80
- 134 -
Head High 2 * * 82
Head High 3 * * 84
Toilet * * 85
Consolation * * 91
Mourning * * 92
Candle * * 93
Fog * * 94
Red Ear * * 96
Heart-Robbing * * 97
Don`t Turn Round * 98
The Puppy Is Wagging the Tail End 99
Good Night * * 100
Pity from the Soul * 101
Ah so Willingly * * 102
Deeper Can`t Go * * 104
Short Life * * 105
Yesterday * * 106
Bringer * * 107
Stay * * 108
Banana * * 109
Ballet * * 110
Pure Pleasure * * 111
Cutter * * 112
Death Through Animals * 113
Lion * * 114
Laughing Is Healthy * 115
Second * * 116
Short * * 117
Small Spoon Big Stomach * 118
Now You Are Dead * 119
You * * 120
Somehow * * 122
Coffee * * 123
Gentle Voice * * 124
Second Skin * * 125
You Will Die Fast * 126
- 135 -
Editor-in-chief
The main editor, Alexander Gorkow, was born
in 1966 in Dusseldorf. Since 2009 head of the reporting
department of the Süddeutschen Zeitung: page three.
Alexander Gorkow was awarded the Theodor Wolff Prize
and the German Reporter Prize. Lives in Munich. His
previous publications: “Kalbs Schweigen” (2003), “Mona”
(2008), “Draußen scheint die Sonne” (2009), und “Hotel
Laguna” (2017).
Drawings
Matthias Matthies, was born in 1969 in Leipzig.
Lives and works in Schwerin and Berlin.
***
Those wishing to have a look at the original author`s

poems, please buy real books from the official author`s
publisher in Germany.
The translations of the poems given here are only to
help understand the original author`s art and not intended
for obtaining any financial benefits of any kind based on
them.
P.S. * It was not English meant by “certain languages”

on page 4. There were some others. Cheers! 
Special thanks to my good friends and dear

close ones who took part, provided their assistance for
these translations to come to light.
L.L.
- 136 -

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*

Alleine bin ich immer hier

These lines are to be met up with in the book, and

Refrain not to kill is right.

Eight years ago, during the final round of a Rammstein

A character is only stubbornness;

So let it begin. Till reads this softly aloud on an autumn

At the seashore at the seashore

What is he doing there, what is he doing there

Where is the captain

Who knows how long love keeps its hold

With your heartlet

From your pulse

Knows the heart well what it`s looking for

I had the time, she needed money

They are calling

I can no longer this resist

Soon we`ll not anymore be again united

Here is a clear thing

I must kiss you

When I am licking her legs

About this and that

She looks angrily

But I want to be just friendly

Ooh he`s suddenly inside

They laid me under a bridge

The insect fell into the water

The wretched bear is dead

The helpless bear the defenseless

Before a child`s bed

The helpless child the defenseless

The eggs roll out of the nest

Should you nourish the greenery of my rage

The marriage duties, I have to say

I just know her too well

Beautiful the body and the face

Do have a glance he must be standing there

Wait oh wait I like you

Your soul crumpling I fold up

There lived once Mr Peter Pohl

Even when a bicycle he rode

He kept it simply, that was a rule

What must happen that must happen

And thus it came to what it should have come

The webcap is a strange creature

In every city there are maids

What have I done

If you are in sorrow just like me

Why are you standing on the edge yet

The lonely dwell on their wistfulness

There are the ugly and the fatties

The league of pallid elegy

And since together we`re in sorrow

There she took my hand then

An apple it is to everyone well known

As your mother died

As your mother died

As your mother died

As your mother died