https://www.medicalnewstoday.

com/articles/162035 Controlling anger

How can I control my anger?

Anger is a natural, healthy emotion. However, it can arise out of proportion to its trigger. In these
cases, the emotion can impede a person’s decision-making, damage relationships, and otherwise
cause harm. Learning to control anger can limit the emotional damage.

Anger is a common response to frustrating or threatening experiences. It can also be a secondary

Feeling angry often and to an extreme degree can impact relationships and a person’s psychological
well-being and quality of life. Suppressing and storing up anger can also have a damaging and lasting
impact.

The journal CNS Spectrums reported in 2015 that 7.8 percentTrusted Source of people in the United
States experienced “inappropriate, intense, or poorly controlled” anger. This was more common
among adult males.

Tools and techniques can help people come to terms with anger triggers and respond to these in
more healthy ways.

In this article, we explore the steps a person can take at home, as well as the therapeutic options
available.

What is anger management?

Anger management involves a range of skills that can help with recognizing the signs of anger and
handling triggers in a positive way.

It requires a person to identify anger at an early stage and to express their needs while remaining
calm and in control.

Managing anger does not involve holding it in or avoiding associated feelings.

Coping with anger is an acquired skill — almost anyone can learn to control the feelings with time,
patience, and dedication.

When anger is negatively affecting a relationship, and especially if it is leading to violent or otherwise
dangerous behavior, a person may benefit from consulting a mental health professional or attending
an anger management class.

However, there are initial, immediate techniques to try. Some people find that they can resolve
these issues without seeking professional assistance.

Controlling anger

Mind, a major mental health charity in the United Kingdom, identifies three main steps for
controlling anger:

1. Recognize the early signs of anger.

2. Give yourself time and space to process the triggers.

3. Apply techniques that can help you control the anger.

In the moment, anger can be difficult to stop in its tracks. However, detecting the emotion early can
be key. It can allow a person to redirect their thought process to a more constructive place.

Anger causes a physical reaction in the body. It releases adrenaline, the “fight-or-flight” hormone
that prepares a person for conflict or danger.

This can have the following effects:

 a rapid heartbeat

 faster breathing

 tension throughout the body

 restlessness, pacing, and tapping of the feet

 clenched fists and jaw

 sweating and trembling

These physical effects can signal a proportionate response to a situation.

Regardless, recognizing the signals early can help a person assess whether the trigger warrants this
physical response.

If necessary, they can then take steps to manage their physical stress.

Taking a step back

Buying some time can be fundamental in limiting an angry response. This can involve simple
measures.

When confronted with a trigger, it may help to:

 count to 10

 go for a short walk

 make contact with a person who is not immediately involved, such as a friend, family
member, or counselor

It can help to vocally express the thoughts behind the anger to a person who is not the focus of the
reaction.

This can help defuse the situation and more clearly identify the cause of the intense feelings.

Applying management techniques

These can help calm a person or distract them long enough to process the thoughts in a constructive
way.

Different techniques are effective for different people, but finding a method that works can be
instrumental in defusing episodes of extreme anger.

Some techniques include:

 Easing physical tension: Try tensing each part of the body for a count of 10, then releasing it.

 Mindfulness: Meditation is one example of a mindfulness technique, and these can help shift
the mind away from anger during triggering situations, especially after consistent practice.

 Exercise: Physical activity is a great way to use up excess adrenalin. A brisk run or walk or
combat sports, such as boxing or martial arts, can be useful outlets for aggressive or
confrontational feelings.

 Find alternative channels for anger: It can help to express anger in a way that limits harm to
others, such as tearing newspaper, crushing ice cubes over a sink, or punching or screaming
into a pillow.

 Create distractions: Distraction techniques, such as dancing to energetic music, taking a

When preparing to bring up frustration with a peer, it can help to plan what to say. This can help
maintain focus and direction in the conversation and reduce the risk of misguided anger.

Also, focusing on solutions rather than problems increases the chances of a resolution and reduces
the likelihood of an angry reaction.

Getting at least 7 hours of quality sleep every night also contributes to mental and physical health.
Researchers have linked sleep deprivation to a number of health problems, including irritability and
anger.

Therapy

Individual therapy can help a person identify and manage triggers.

Some signs that a person may need professional or medical help include:

 being in trouble with the law

 frequently feeling that they have to hold in their anger

 regularly having intense arguments with family, friends, or colleagues

 getting involved in fights or physical confrontations

 physically assaulting a partner or child

 threatening violence to people or property

 breaking objects during an outburst

 losing their temper when driving and becoming reckless

Anger issues rarely exist in isolation. They can derive from a range of other mental health issues,
including:

 alcohol or drug dependence

 bipolar disorder
  schizotypal personality disorders

 psychotic disorder

 borderline personality disorder

Addressing underlying issues can help reduce disproportionate feelings of anger. Sometimes,
however, a person needs to control anger on its own terms.

Management therapy can take place in group sessions or one-to-one consultations with a counselor
or psychotherapist.

If a person has received a diagnosis for a mental health issue, such as depression, this should
influence their anger management.

In anger management training, a person learns to:

 identify triggers

 respond constructively, either in the early stages of anger or beforehand

 handle the triggers

 adjust irrational and extreme thought processes

 return to a calm, peaceful state

 express feelings and needs assertively but calmly in situations that tend to cause anger and
frustration

 redirect energy and resources into problem-solving

A therapist or counselor can guide an individual through the following questions:

 How do I know when I am angry?

 What types of people, situations, events, places, and other triggers make me angry?

 How do I respond when I am angry? What do I do?

 What impact does my angry reaction have on other people?

It can help to understand that anger and calmness are not clear-cut emotions. Anger, for example,
can range from mild irritation to a full rage.

Learning to recognize the spectrum can help people identify when they are truly angry and when
they are reacting severely to more minor frustrations. A key aim of therapy is to help people
discover and act on these distinctions.