This document provides guidance on solidifying a new self-story through habit formation and environmental changes. It recommends affirming the new story daily for 21 days through activities like writing affirmations, journaling, or watching an introductory video. Changes to one's physical and social environment are also suggested to minimize triggers for old habits and maximize exposure to inspiring situations and supportive people. Goals and positive affirmations are to be set across different life areas to align one's actions with the new story.
This document provides guidance on solidifying a new self-story through habit formation and environmental changes. It recommends affirming the new story daily for 21 days through activities like writing affirmations, journaling, or watching an introductory video. Changes to one's physical and social environment are also suggested to minimize triggers for old habits and maximize exposure to inspiring situations and supportive people. Goals and positive affirmations are to be set across different life areas to align one's actions with the new story.
In order to solidify this new story in your brain, it needs to become habituated thought. This will require you to remind yourself of your new story on a regular bases. Below are several ideas for ways you can do this. Decide what method(s) you will use and when or how you will use them. Write 3 to 5 affirmations that capture the most important aspects of your new story, beliefs and identify. Read these affirmations to yourself every day for 21 days: Keep the list next to your bed and read it first thing when you wake up or before you go to bed OR post them on sticky notes on your bathroom mirror and read them to yourself while looking into your eyes. Write in a journal every day for 21 days. Reflect on what experiences throughout the day your “old story” snuck back in—did you catch yourself telling it? Acting it out? You are noticing what happened, not placing blame or judgment. Acknowledge the progress that even NOTICING the old story reflects. Remind yourself of the new story and consider if is anything you can do differently in the future. Record a video of yourself reading or telling your old story. At the end, tell yourself why you are committed to changing this story. Then read your new story. Watch this video daily for 21 days. Complete the Uncovering the Lies activity in this course (which lasts for 7 days) and upon completion, continue reading the “truths” to yourself every day for another 14 days. At the end of 21 days, you can continue these activities or return to them any time you need a reminder. I will do ____________________________________ every day for 21 days at (time of day) _______________. I will do ____________________ to make this easy to remember (put needed materials someplace easily accessible, set an alarm, etc).
Change Your Environment
Throughout the course, we discussed a number of external factors that influence and perpetuate your story, habits and patterns, such as cues in your physical environment, the opinions or beliefs of people around you, and certain people, topics or situations that act as a trigger for certain memories, feelings, or behaviors. Consider the new story you have written, what you have identified that you truly want in your life, and any changes you wish to make to beliefs that you hold. Considering the life you WANT to create, ask yourself if there are any changes in your physical and social environement that would make it easier to LIVE OUT the new story you have created for your life. PHYSICAL ENVIRONMENT: Your home and/or workspace: Do you have any habits that are too easy to continue due to cues in your current environment? For example, if you’re goal is to reduce the amount of time you watch TV, could you move or remove the TV? If you wish to be in a loving new relationship, do you have any photos of old relationships in your home that you should remove? Could you buy or print a lovely picture of a happy couple and hang it somewhere in your home or office? Are there any items in your home or office that have strong memories or emotions attached to them (cues)? How could you either remove them or change them? Even if there are no specific changes you need to make, consider making slight modifications in order for the new stimulation to prime your brain for being open to change. Add a new, bright colored object to a room. Shift the organization of the furniture. De-clutter your desk. SOCIAL ENVIRONMENT: People and situations: Are there any locations or situation that trigger negative memories and emotions? This could be a certain street, building or home, certain holidays or types of social events. In what way could you eliminate or minimize your need to be in these situations? In what ways can you prepare in advance to feel stronger, more confident and more peaceful when you do have to be in these situations? For example, if you are trying to quit smoking, you may want to avoid going on breaks at work with other individuals who smoke. If you’re trying to stop drinking so much, minimize time spent in a bar. If you experienced a traumatic auto accident on a certain road, choose a route that takes you around it. What locations or situations fill you up? Inspire you? What places or situations can you experience MORE OFTEN in order to feed your passions, allow you to relax, or to keep you motivated toward your goals? Consider the people in your life and how they can either help or hinder your progress with living your new story. Are you around people who may trigger your old habits and patterns? Are you around people who will discourage your dreams or instill fear? In what ways could you eliminate or minimize contact with these people? Alternatively, is there a way you can make changes in the way you interact with these people to minimize their negative impact on you? For example, if you have had negative experiences with a colleague at work, is there a way that you could either a) make amends and improve the relationship or b) change your break schedule and/or the entrance you use in order to minimize contact with this person? Are there people who will support and believe in you? Are there people (you know or don’t yet know) who it would be helpful to be around MORE in order to keep you inspired?
Goals and Affirmations
GOALS: Specific Changes: Below is a chart of categories that we have reviewed several times throughout the course. For each life area, write your goals—what you would like to change, followed by a positive affirmation statement. Refer back to your new story and the activity in which you identified what you want. Ask yourself, “what changes would I need to make in order to be living in alignment with my true desires and new story?” AFFIRMATIONS: Write positive affirmation statements that make you feel empowered about the goals you’ve set for yourself. Like in the Uncovering the Lies activity, make sure your affirmation is written as a positive statement. Do not use “not” or “no” or “isn’t” or “don’t”. For example, if your goal is to improve your communication with your spouse, do not write “We no longer fight over everything,” instead write “My spouse and I speak kindly to one another and discuss important life issues with respect and love.” Making sure your affirmations are POSITIVE is the first P in the 4 P’s. The other 3 are o Personal (I, Me statements) o Present (as if it’s already happening, not future) o Passion (put emotion into it)