PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

SELF-CONCEPT (the ideal self), then I will feel a sense of mental

Imagine yourself looking into a mirror. What do well-being or peace of mind. If the way that I am is
you see? Do you see your ideal self or your actual not aligned with how I want to be, the
self? Your ideal self is the self that you aspire to incongruence, or lack of alignment, will result in
be. It is the one that you hope will possess mental distress or anxiety.
characteristics similar to that of a mentor or
some other worldly figure. Your actual self, The greater the level of incongruence between the
however, is the one that you actually see. It is the ideal self and real self, the greater the level of
self that has characteristics that you were resulting distress. Personal development modules
nurtured or, in some cases, born to have. ultimate aim is greater self-knowledge that will lead
to higher alignment between these two personality
The actual self and the ideal self are two broad domains.
categories of self-concept. Self-concept refers to
your awareness of yourself. It is the construct that PERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS
negotiates these two selves. In other words, it Personal effectiveness means making use of all the
connotes first the identification of the ideal self as personal resources – talents, skills, energy and time,
separate from others, and second, it encompasses all to enable you to achieve life goals. Your knowledge
the behaviors evaluated in the actual self that you of yourself and how you manage yourself impacts
engage in to reach the ideal self. directly on your personal effectiveness. Being self-
aware, making the most of your strengths, learning
new skills and techniques and behavioral flexibility
The actual self is built on self-knowledge. Self- are all keys to improving your personal
knowledge is derived from social interactions that performance.
provide insight into how others react to you. The Our personal effectiveness depends on our innate
actual self is who we actually are. It is how we characteristics – talent and experience accumulated
think, how we feel, look, and act. The actual self in the process of personal development. Talents first
can be seen by others, but because we have no way are needed to be identified and then developed to be
of truly knowing how others view us, the actual self used in a particular subject area (science, literature,
is our self-image. sports, politics, etc.). Experience includes
knowledge and skills that we acquire in the process
of cognitive and practical activities.
Knowledge is required for setting goals, defining an
The ideal self, on the other hand, is how we want to
action plan to achieve them and risk assessment.
be. It is an idealized image that we have developed
Skills also determine whether real actions are
over time, based on what we have learned and
performed in accordance with the plan. If the same
experienced. The ideal self could include
ability is used many times in the same situation,
components of what our parents have taught us,
then it becomes a habit that runs automatically,
what we admire in others, what our society
subconsciously.
promotes, and what we think is in our best interest.
Here are some skills that will greatly increase the
efficiency of any person who owns them:
There is negotiation that exists between the two
selves which is complex because there are 1. Determination. It allows you to focus only on
numerous exchanges between the ideal and actual achieving a specific goal without being distracted
self. These exchanges are exemplified in social by less important things or spontaneous desires. It
may be developed with the help of self-discipline
roles that are adjusted and re-adjusted, and are
exercise.
derived from outcomes of social interactions from
2. Self-confidence. It appears in the process of
infant to adult development. personal development, as a result of getting aware
Alignment is important. If the way that I am (the of yourself, your actions and their consequences.
actual self) is aligned with the way that I want to be Selfconfidence is manifested in speech, appearance,
PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
dressing, gait, and physical condition. To develop it, you feel has been handed to you? Or do you write
you need to learn yourself and your capabilities, the script and make your life beautiful? By the way,
gain positive attitude and believe that by performing the Producer of the movie is God. He tells you,
right actions and achieving right goals you will “Make the movie beautiful, and I will give you all
certainly reach success. that you need for success.”
3. Persistence. It makes you keep moving forward
regardless of emerging obstacles – problems,
laziness, bad emotional state, etc. It reduces the
costs of overcoming obstacles. It can also be
developed with the help of self-discipline exercise.
4. Managing stress. It helps combat stress that arises
in daily life from the environment and other people.
Stress arises from the uncertainty in an unknown
situation when a lack of information creates the risk
of negative consequences of your actions. It
increases efficiency in the actively changing
environment.
5. Problem-solving skills. They help cope with the
problems encountered with a lack of experience. It
increases efficiency by adopting new ways of
achieving goals when obtaining a new experience.
There are three kinds of people in this world:
The first is the Moviegoer. This person watches the
movie of their lives, admires some parts and
criticizes others. Aside from that, they do nothing
else. All she says the whole day is, “I like this thing
and but I don’t like that thing.” The Moviegoer feels
she has absolutely no control of their lives ---
except to comment about it. Moviegoers are the
most pathetic, miserable people in the world.
The second is the Actor. This person does not only
watch the movie of her life. She actually realizes
she’s the Actor – and can control a big part of her
life. She can actually make or break the movie – by
how well she delivers her lines and how she
portrays her character. Actors are a happy bunch,
realizing they’re the start of the show and enjoy
some level of control. But many times, they wish
the movie would end in another way – but realize
that they have no say in such things.
The third is the Scriptwriter. This person does not
only watch, and she doesn’t only act, but she
actually creates the entire movie from her mind. She
determines what she will say, what she will do, and
how the movie will end. She realizes she has
enormous control over her life, and sees to it that
the movie of her life will turn out beautiful. Who
are you among these three people? Do you merely
watch your life go y? Or do you act out a script that
PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
Include descriptions of your height, weight, facial
appearance, and quality of skin, hair and
descriptions of body areas such as your neck, chest,
waist, legs
2. Intellectual Self. Include here an assessment of
how well you reason and solve problems, your
capacity to learn and create, your general amount of
knowledge, your specific areas of knowledge,
wisdom you have acquired, and insights you have.
3. Emotional Self. Write as many words or phrase
about typical feelings you have, feelings you
seldom have, feelings you try to avoid, feelings you
especially enjoy, feelings from your past and
present, and feelings which are associated with each
other.
4. Sensual Self. Write how you feel as a sensual
person. What sense do you use most – sight,
hearing, speaking, smelling, touching? How do you
feel about the different ways you take in
information - through the eyes, ears, mouth, nose,
pores, and skin. In what ways do you let
information in and out of your body? 5.
Interactional Self. Include descriptions of your
strengths and weaknesses in intimate relationships
and relationships to friends, family, co-students and
strangers in social settings. Describe the strengths
and weaknesses which your friends and family have
noticed. Describe what kind of son or daughter,
brother or sister you are.
6. Nutritional Self. How do you nourish yourself?
What foods do you like and dislike? What do you
like and dislike about these?
7. Contextual Self. Descriptors could be in the areas
of maintenance of your living environment: reaction
to light, temperature, space, weather, colors, sound
and seasons and your impact on the environment.
8. Spiritual Self or Life Force. Write words or
phrases which tell about how you feel in this area.
Lesson 2 This could include your feelings about yourself and
organized religion, reactions about your spiritual
ASSESS ASPECTS OF YOUR DEVELOPMENT connections to others, feelings about your spiritual
1. Physical Self. Describe yourself. Try not to development and history, and thought about your
censor any thoughts which come to your mind. metaphysical self. Think about your inner peace and
joy. Think about your spiritual regimen or routine
PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
emotional stress and strain usually impacts
emotions negatively. Negative emotions that are not
The self-concept is represented by several aspects
managed are stored and repressed. Repression is
of the self. It is conceived as collection of multiple,
destructive to a content self since all feelings, not
context-dependent selves. This construct believes
only negative ones are stored away. Accessing
that context activates particular regions of self-
feelings when they are needed now becomes
knowledge and self-relevant feedback affects self-
difficult, leaving the individual numb and hopeless.
evaluations and affect. A deeper look on the
different aspects of self can identify specific areas For instance, a girl realizes that she is giving much
for self-regulation, stability and improvement. attention on the physical aspects and less attention
on her intellectual self. In this way, she can discover
In a nutshell, an individual is composed of three
how much money and time spent maintaining her
basic but very different aspects of the self. They are
physique and its consequences in her grades. By
the physical or tangible aspects as they relate to the
this honest evaluation of herself, she can plan
body, the intellectual and conscious aspects as they
effective actions to improve her study habits. She
relate to the mind, and the emotional and intuitive
can start seeking for help and for related books to
aspects as they relate to the spirit. All three aspects
read or browse articles to help her improve her
of the self work together in perfect harmony when
study habits.
attention is paid to all three simultaneously.
Many individuals put a strong emphasis on the
physical aspect of the self. The body is tangible,
obvious, and we respond to it easily. More time and
money is spent on enhancing the physical
component than either of the other two aspects. This
does not mean, however, that the body is healthy or
strong. The body provides a place to house the spirit
(often experienced as feelings) and the mind (often
experienced as thought).
It may be important to some that their mind be
prominent and well educated. The mind is
important, as it is the part of the self that directs the
other two aspects. The mind learns what to do and
communicates the information to the body and the
feelings. What the mind believes, the body
manifests or acts on, and the emotions feel, or
respond with. People store both healthy and
destructive thoughts and beliefs and responds to
life's circumstances in the most prominent manner.
The mind provides access creativity and serenity
which are necessary for such processes as prayer,
forgiveness, acceptance, and passion.
The human emotions are the most feared aspect of
the self, as individuals are reluctant and unprepared
to manage them. Managing feelings is like trying to
hold water in the palm of your hand. They are
illusive and deceptive. A decision made under