*PROLOGUE*

*Mahlubandile*

Zimkhitha : my king
I look at her with a smile , she
graces me with an eye smile

She sits down

Me : my queen

I lean over giving her a kiss

She smiles fully now

Zimkhitha : should I be worried
?

Me : about ?

Zimkhitha : you , you haven’t

been yourself

I sigh

Me : all our kids are grown , and

they grew up right here in front
of our eyes . We saw them ,
until they took up duties of their
own . They’ve always been here
, in our eyes

She smiles taking my hand

Zimkhitha : Kumkani , this is

about Rain ?

Me : she’s our last born ,

honestly I don’t feel very much
at ease with her leaving . And
she is not just an ordinary child

Zimkhitha : she’s 20 , and not a

baby

I chuckle

Me : she’s our baby

Zimkhitha : I know , but all she’s

asking for is to finish her degree
. And she will come back home ,
let’s be glad she accepted Wits
instead of going to Dubai . This
is her dream , let’s not deny her
. And Joburg is not far , we also
lived there

Me : I am still not happy

She laughs
Zimkhitha : you have
attachment issues , you will be
fine . Your little queen is
growing out of the wing now ,
she wants to fly on her own
using her own feathers

I really hope my daughter will

be fine

Rain has never left home

But I can’t deny that she’s very
much different from all of her
siblings

I hope she will adapt to life

away from the kingdom
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Zweli : look at me
I lift my head , he wipes my
tears

Zweli : I hate seeing you like this

Me : I don’t know what to do

anymore

He sighs

Zweli : it’s going to be okay

Me : really ? It’s like everything I
do , I just push him away more

Zweli : he’s just ….

My phone rings

Zweli : take it , please stop

crying like this
He places a kiss on my forehead
, and walks out of the bedroom

Me : Mageba

He sighs

Bayede : what has he done ?

More fresh tears stream down

my face
Me : I think I have reached my
end now , I don’t know what to
do . He doesn’t want to go back
to varsity

He sighs

Bayede : is that boy insane ?

He’s in his 3rd year

He should ask him that and not

me , because I don’t think he is
Me : I tried talking to him , he
shuts me out . And he’s very
rude to Zweli

Bayede : maybe he should come

here , I hate that you’re dealing
with all this on your own

Me : I am ….no ! I can’t send

him there , he doesn’t like your
wife
Bayede : he doesn’t like your
husband too

I take a deep breath

Few seconds of silence , and we

just both laugh

Me : honestly though , after

loosing 3 kids together . The
one child we have , is driving us
insane

Bayede : I will come to South

Africa next week , I will have a
stern talk with him . No man is
supposed to be stressing my
baby mama like this

I smile , with a slight laugh

Me : thank you for calling

Bayede : anytime , I will see you
next week

Me : bye

I drop the call

Hoping that with Bayede

coming , it doesn’t cause
another battle
That I called him here , so he
can scold his child

Honestly if I knew that God will

take all of my kids

And the one he leaves me with ,

would stress me day in and day
out

Without a doubt , I wouldn’t

have had any kids to begin with
I love my son , but right now I
have reached a breaking point
as a parent

It doesn’t help that his father is

halfway across the world

And the only male figure in this

house , he doesn’t see with
nothing
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 01*
*Thongalethu*
Musa : I got you a shoot

Me : for what ?

Musa : this underwear line

Me : how much are they paying
?

He laughs

Musa : 10K

Me : for a day ?

Musa : yeah
Me : okay , not bad

Musa : not bad ? Fuck ! You’re

are greedy

I chuckle

Me : wait ….so you’ll get your

cut there ?

He stares at me
Me : if that’s the case , I am not
taking it

He sighs

Musa : no , they’ll pay me

He’s fucking lying

But I don’t care , cause I won’t

feel bad and give him a share
Me : sure

Musa : so I can confirm it ?

He gives me his eyes if

desperation

Getting this gig means

recognition for him , as my so
called agent

Me : yeah
Musa : I’ll get on with it

He gets up

Musa : and ….can you look at

that proposal . Like it’s been
over a week

Me : I have been busy , it’s not

like I was sitting around
Musa : you can spare some time

Me : it won’t even take 5

minutes , I’ll get to it

He sighs shaking his head

heading for the door

He opens , and Winnie walks in

Musa : Winnie
Winnie : hi Musa

He walks out

She walks in closing the door

Winnie : hey star

I nod

She sits down next to me

Winnie : you haven’t called me
in a week , and I haven’t seen
you in two weeks

Me : I’ve been busy

Winnie : busy to even pick up a

call , or respond my text

Me : if I haven’t done that , then

yes . Too busy for that
She sighs and gets up

Winnie : I don’t even know why

I still bother myself with you ,
it’s like I am chasing you

She is

And that’s how it has always

been
She grabs her bag walking
towards the door

I chuckle shaking my head

Me : sit your flat ass down , and

stop acting up . It’s not cute at
all , I won’t beg you after all

I take out the small packet ,

along with a bank card
Winnie : I’m supposed to stay
here for this ? Watch you snort
drugs

Me : if you walk out of that door

, don’t ever bring your black ass
here again

I draw two lines on the table

And lean back

She finally sits back down

Me : I would really appreciate a

BJ right now

Winnie : I didn’t come here to

be your sex toy

Me : then whatever you came

here for , good luck

I close my eyes
Few minutes pass , and I feel
her hands sliding to my pants

I look at her with a smile

Me : that wasn’t so hard babe ,

you just love us arguing for shit .
Come give me a kiss

She pulls up , I grab the back of

her neck as we kiss
And she unbuckles my pants
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Lona : you’re back

I nod grabbing my bag ,

unpacking my clothes

To think I left , without even

unpacking
I was looking forward to seeing
my ass of a boyfriend

Only for him to make me even

regret going there

Lona : you were with that good

for nothing boyfriend of yours

Me : please stop , not this early

I only slept the night

Morning came , and it was like I
wasn’t even there

Lona : why do you do this to

yourself ?

I sigh

Me : I don’t expect you to

understand
Lona : oh I don’t understand ,
because you’re just letting him
use you

Me : I love him

Lona : he is so fucken broken ,

he doesn’t know what love is

Me : please stop

She shakes her head

Lona : I hope you open your
eyes sooner rather than later

Me : we’re back to varsity now ,

he will have more time for us .
Unlike when he was home

Even I don’t believe my words

She laughs
And it’s a very painful mocking
laugh

Lona : he has never had time for

you , and he never will . Stop
fooling yourself , because now
it’s like you’re a double fool

Me : wow thanks a lot Lona

Lona : you just piss me off

honestly
She walks out , slamming the
door

I sit down on the bed tearing up

The sad thing is that she’s right

But I just can’t leave him

What will I do with all these

feelings that I have for him ?
I will keep on trying , until we
can be okay

Like how he was when we first

met

He wasn’t always like this , I

believe he will change again
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : my princess , this is
beautiful

I look at her

Me : you like it ?
Busi : it is really beautiful

Me : well then , you can have it .

And please , as soon as we get
to Joburg , just call me Rain

We laugh

Busi : I will try , but of course it

will take some adjusting to
Me : that’s …

A knock comes at the door

She goes to attend to it

My parents walk in

Me : my king , my queen

Busi and I both acknowledge

their presence
My mother smiles

Dad : why are you so eager to

be leaving ?

I laugh

Dad : I hate this feeling , it feels

like I am giving you away
Me : that’s something that will
never happen , I have a
kingdom to rule . I will be back

He smiles

Dad : here

I walk closer to them

Dad : this is the keys to your

house
I think it would have been fine
just settling in at res

But of course no , this man

would never allow that

He bought me a house

Dad : you will have your driver

at all times , and Busi doesn’t
leave your sight . You’ll take
your maiden with , so she can
help around the house . And
you cannot be without protect .
So you will take 5 guards with ,
that’s not a discussion

Why so many guards ?

Dad : I want you to know , your

security is very tight and high .
There’s no compromising on
that
Me : I understand my king

I feel like I will be suffocated ,

but his word is his word

Mom : take care of yourself

baby

Me : I will , my queen

She walks over and we hug

Me : I love you so much

She moves back with a smile ,

her eyes glistening

Me : I will call , and come home

as much as I can

Mom : that place is just ….

She heaves a sigh , shaking her
head

Mom : just be safe , that’s all

Me : it’s a promise

Dad : don’t leave without seeing

Jongikhaya

Me : I will make sure to see him

He nods and they both walk out

Now my heart feels heavy

But then again , I am doing this

for myself

Just because I have duties ,

doesn’t mean I don’t have
dreams
I just want to have my life , my
own way in a way

Because already it’s like my life

is not mine
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 02*
*Rain*
Me : oh well , this is crazy

She laughs
Busi : this house is huge

Me : I believe there’s more than

5 guards here

I’m only 20 , what am I doing

with a double storey house like
this ?

My father loves exaggerating

Busi : it’s beautiful

Me : and huge yes

She laughs

We walk around the house , and

I think will even get lost in my
own house

Busi : should we cook ?

Me : no , we will just order in .
And I need a bath

Busi : okay

I leave her walking to the main

bedroom

I take my clothes off , heading

to the bathroom
I take a very long needed warm
bath

Walking out , my bags have

been brought in

I dry and lotion

I grab the bag I got from my

uncle , that he gave me before I
left
I take out my beads and put
them on , and my royal bracelet

I put on bum shorts with a vest

and flip flops

Taking my blue tiger cloth , I tie

it around my head

Grabbing my phone , I walk

downstairs
Busi is with Asiphe

I sit down with them

Me : what are we eating ?

Busi : are you ordering for

everyone ?

I smile
Me : they need food , they can’t
protect me with empty
stomachs

We laugh

Busi : platters will do better

Me : I need junk , I mean your

fries and burger . Ribs and
wings , like such
Busi : Tatomkhulu be with us all
(grandfather)

We laugh

I download the food apps , and

order food enough for us all

Ordering extra , in case there’s

more guards here and I don’t
know about them
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
I pull a chair and sit down

Me : good morning

Mom : are you going to res ?

Me : no
She sighs

Mom : how do you decide to

leave varsity when you’re on
your third year ?

Me : I can’t juggle gigs and

varsity

This is just going to create an

argument
Mom : are you not being taken
care of ?

Me : what do you mean ?

I grab a glass and pour juice

Mom : you get an allowance

from the three of us , yet you
still doing gigs for what ?
Me : to make my own money ,
to pay my dues

Zweli chuckles

He better keep himself out of

this

I have nothing against him

But this is not his business

I am not his business either

Mom : what dues exactly ?

Me : I am making my own
money , doesn’t that matter ?

Mom : don’t you have money ?

Me : it’s not the same as the

one I make myself
Mom : I am done talking about
this , I hope you know what
you’re doing

Me : I will go to my apartment ,
so you don’t always have to
bring it up

She gets up

Zweli : baby please sit down and

eat
She looks at him

Zweli : please , it’s way too early

for this

She sits back down

Me : I am sorry

Mom : no , you’re not

I sigh taking my phone out ,
attending that email Musa sent
me
.
.
.
.
*Mahlubandile*
Me : you think she’s okay ?

He laughs

Jongikhaya : she’s fine , she can

take care of herself
Me : I can’t help but worry

Jongikhaya : it’s your job as a

parent to

I sigh

Me : I hope she doesn’t loose

her ways there
Jongikhaya : do you know your
kids ?

I frown

Jongikhaya : we all have kids ,

and they give us grey hairs . You
have the most disciplined kids
ever , it’s like your bewitched
them

We laugh
Me : those are your nieces and
nephews

Jongikhaya : exactly , we had a

good talk before she left . She
knows what’s expected of her ,
trust me she won’t lose her way
. Put some faith in her

Me : at least that’s assurance

Jongikhaya : stop worrying

If she can survive a month there

, then maybe I can ease up
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Swazi : babe , honestly I don’t
see how you’re going to solve
anything by going there
I sigh

Me : that boy is out of line

Swazi : and you think you’ll

make a difference ?

Me : I am his father , what do

you take me for ?
Swazi : Nomakhosi is married ,
her husband can play a father
role in this

Me : and you think he hasn’t

been doing that ? But then
again , that boy is not his
responsibility . He married Khosi
, not him . What father figure
when I am still alive ?

She looks down

Me : they’re doing their best ,
and I can’t turn a blind eye . At
the end of the day , he is my
son

Swazi : I am pregnant , and

you’re leaving me here

Me : you’re only 3 weeks

pregnant , why must we make a
big deal out of that ?
She goes quite

Me : I am going to South Africa,

and that’s that . When you’re a
parent , you don’t choose when
you want to do it like it’s a
choice . It’s a must , and it’s a
daily thing . I can’t turn a blind
eye to what’s happening
Swazi : it’s okay , I understand . I
am sorry

She walks upstairs

I shake my head , taking my

phone and booking a flight
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 03*
*Thongalethu*
Musa : finally

I chuckle

Me : that only need 5 minutes

of my time , don’t make it a big
deal

He sighs

Musa : I am just glad you gave it

your attention
Me : when is the shoot ?

Musa : this weekend

Me : okay

Musa : be sober please

Me : don’t annoy me , I am not

always high
He chuckles

Musa : are you taking the deal ?

Me : I don’t know

Musa : why ?

I heave a sigh

Me : they’re offering me
peanuts
Musa : honestly though ?

He sits down

Musa : Not everything is about

money

Me : it is to me

Musa : recognition !
For him he means

Me : oh well , do you know how

much they will make from that
? If I agree to be the
ambassador of their brand , I
need double that . Remember ,
you still need your fee there

Musa : double , that’s a stretch .

But I will talk to them , and hear
what they say
Me : if they really want me ,
then it won’t be a problem

Musa : you’re difficult , and I

don’t know what agent will
settle for this

Me : the one who can

I get up
Me : I am going to my
apartment , call me if you need
me

Musa : sure

I walk out heading to my car ,

I’m a bit down this morning

I’m even low on fuel , but I will

make it to my place
I’ll fuel some other day

I am lazy to drive around

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Me : are you going out ?

She ties her sneakers

Lona : yeah , it’s orientation
tomorrow . I have this night to
let lose . And just party like
there’s no tomorrow

I sigh

Things are slightly sour between

us

Lona is more than just a

roommate , but she’s a friend
Just after what happened , a
few days ago

I don’t know

I feel like she went too hard

Even though it was the truth

I just wish she could understand

, and not judge me
The heart wants what it wants ,
I love Thongalethu

And I can’t do nothing about

that

I mean , I don’t control my

feelings

We have been together for 5

years
Since from high school

Things just changed when we

got to varsity

And he started this modelling

business of his

The parties , and the drugs

It just wasn’t the same anymore
, but before all that . Things
were good

Me : and I am not invited ?

She sighs getting up from her

bed

She fixes herself

Lona : I don’t know , maybe you
want to go and be with your
boyfriend

Me : no , and I’m sure he’s busy

with his things

Lona : so you want to come

with ?

I nod
Lona : you have 20 minutes to
get ready

I smile

Lona : but I called an Uber , and

I didn’t know you would want to
come

If only we had a ride , it sucks

not having a car
Because I know she will drink a
lot

But I’m a light drinker

Me : let me make a call

I grab my phone and call him

After a few rings he answer

Thonga : sure
Me : babe

Thonga : mhm ?

Me : are you home ?

Thonga : yes , but I don’t want

company

The guy I am dating

Me : I don’t want to come

Thonga : so what’s up ?

Me : I am going out with Lona

Thonga : have fun , and don’t

fuck around

Me : what do you take me for ?

Thonga : why did you call ?

Me : can’t you borrow me your
car ?

Thonga : it’s low on fuel

I sigh

Me : I won’t crash your car

Thonga : I did not say you will , I

am not lying
Me : fine

Thonga : come and get it , but

bring it back with full tank

He drops the call

Lona : he gave you his car ?

Me : he says it’s low on fuel ,

but said I should come fetch it
Lona : so ?

Me : we can go get it if you’re

okay with that

Lona : that’s fine

Do I even have enough money

to fuel ?
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : you are so hooked on
your phone

We’re watching a movie

The house is quite

It’s nothing like being at the

palace
Where there’s people
everywhere

And noise all the time

Me : varsity kids having fun

She laughs

Busi : you and partying , I don’t

see that
Me : can never be me

I am just not a party person

I don’t attend such things

Not even if it’s family

I have never had a party in my

life

Not even a birthday party

Me : these people party insane

Busi : we’re villagers

Me : sure we are

I log out , and put my phone

down

Tomorrow we will be going to

campus for orientation
Busi will also be studying there

That’s why she came with

She’s more than just a guardian

to me

We have developed a friendship

, one that goes beyond royal
duties
I am happy she’s here

And I don’t have to adapt on my

own , in a place I don’t know
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 04*
*Rain*
Me : can we talk ?

She looks at me
Busi : you’re not yet ready

Me : I woke up drenched

She gets up

Busi : what’s wrong ?

Me : my heart is heavy , I don’t

know

Busi : should we be concerned ?

Me : I will call my uncle , but I
need one of the rooms . Is there
a room that’s not occupied , or
with much furniture ? Things
that we can be able to move
out , so I can use it . I need a
room that’s empty

Busi : I haven’t been inside

every other room , but I’m sure
there’s one
Me : okay , we can do that
when we get back . I’ll go call
my uncle

She nods , I head back upstairs

I have already showered , I just

need to dress up

I take out a long yellow strap

sleeve dress , putting it on
With black sandals

I will have to call my uncle on

the way

We cannot be late

I know Busi is always on time

And also we’re both new in this

place
So we need to familiarise
ourselves with it , before we
start with lectures

If I can survive this semester

I will definitely see Varsity and

Joburg through

I take my black and yellow tiger

cloth
I cannot go anywhere without
having a cloth

Even if I’m not wearing it , I just

have to have to it

Even if it’s just inside my bag , I

just have to have a cloth with
me when I’m out in public

I take the red oil Vimbela , and

apply beneath my feet
Another thing I cannot leave the
house without doing

Otherwise , I will pick on

whatever I step on in the
streets

This way , I am protecting

myself

From anything I might step on

Also for my feet , to prevent
them from getting swollen

Because I will be wearing shoes

for the most parts of the day
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I get to his apartment , and it
doesn’t seem like he’s going
anywhere
He’s opening the door in
sweatpants

He hasn’t even showered , or

taken a bath

Me : babe , I bought your car

back

Thonga : it better be on full tank

Me : it is
I can’t believe I fuelled his car

And he doesn’t even seem

thankful for that

Thonga : and you didn’t scratch

it ?

Me : I can drive you know

He takes his keys

Thonga : if it ever has a dent ,
you will pay for it

It’s too early for this drama

Who just wakes up and be this

rude and moody

Thonga : and I don’t want to

scent of idiots in there , I swear
we will get to it
I sigh

Me : I didn’t lift any guys into

your car Thongalethu !

I’m getting annoyed now

He chuckles

Me : I guess it’s all funny to him

Me : are you not going to
campus ?

It’s just orientation , and

honestly only first years will be
so eager to attend to that

Thonga : no

Me : oh okay , well I am going

Thonga : okay
Me : do you have your lessons
schedule already ?

Thonga : lessons for what ?

Me : lectures you’ll be attending

Thonga : I am not going there

What the hell ?

Me : what do you mean ?

Thonga : I am not going back to

campus

He goes on to grab food from

the microwave

And he sits down with the take

away

It looks like ribs

Me : is this some kind of a joke
?

He chuckles

Thonga : what kind of a joke ?

Do you see me joking ?

Wow !

Me : you’re leaving …
Thonga : hey ! It’s too early for
this . Baby if there’s nothing
else , leave and go to campus .
That’s where you’re headed
right ?

I am without words right now

Like for what reason is he

leaving varsity for ?
Me : can I just ask ?

Thonga : do you see my parents

anywhere here ?

Me : from here , exactly what is

your future ? Drugs and
modelling gigs ?

Thonga : hayhiii Winnie , you’re

not Nomakhosi Zulu . Don’t
bore me
And then him calling his mother
who’s married to a Ndlovu , yet
still with his father’s name

This guy has issues no lies

Me : fine , it’s your future

you’re ruining anyways , so you
can do whatever you want to do

I head for the door

I cannot deal with this right
now.
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : you look like hell

I take my sandals out , just

dropping them off the floor
I feel like I am going to burst

I have such a pounding

headache

My ears are ringing

I am burping like I drank a

whole tank of soda

I rush to my room , taking my

snuff
And the grass mat , I lay it down

And sit down , on the floor

I take bits of snuff , just pinching

around me before I take pulls

It’s so quite , feels like my head

is spinning

Tears stream down my face

I close my eyes

Worst mistake I made

Leaving this house without my

snuff , and I didn’t even smoke
before I left

That time , I was going in a

place infested by people
All kinds of aura’s and energies
there

A knock comes to the door , I

grab a tissue

Me : ngena (come in)

Busi walks in

She looks so worried

I swear , it’s like she hasn’t lived
with me for 5 years

Busi : my princess , are you okay

?

I smile

Me : I will be fine now

She sits down on the floor

Busi : you scared me , I swear
now I must always check your
bag when we leave this house .
Just to make sure you have
everything that you need

I laugh

Me : I will go insane

Busi : you scare me when you

get like this
This one can’t stand me when I
go into trance

This was absolutely nothing

And most definitely nothing to

be scared about

Me : I really need that room ,

my uncle said the same thing .
We can’t have an ancestral hut
here , but I do need a shrine

Busi : we will most definitely get

to it

That should make things better

Because I will have my praying

place
And have my candles lit , along
with my clothes placed well on
the wall

Because some they’re not

supposed to be folded like they
all are now
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 05*
*Rain*
It’s been a busy day for us

Cleaning this room , and

clearing it out

I just love that it’s downstairs

And also that it’s not big

It’s perfect , for being my shrine

room
Me : I need some incense and
sage , I don’t have enough . Also
the candles , I think I need
bundles . And the snuff , we
should get a big tin

Busi : I feel like now I will know

more about this

We laugh
Everything is in place

My cloths that need to be on

the wall , are placed there in
order as they should be

There’s fruits and sweets , also

drinks and alcohol

I can’t set up a shrine without

those
And I had to talk to my
ancestors first before doing this
so they give me permission to

Because it’s not home

But because it’s my house , and

not a rental place

I am allowed to do this , just as

long as I follow procedure and
do what’s required
I guess my father was right to
get me a house

Because I wouldn’t have been

able to do this at res

And well , this is not the family

shrine

Not deep necessarily ancestral

needs had to be done
I turn and look at Busi and
Asiphe

Me : there’s only us in the

house , I don’t have worries
about the guards and our driver
. Because I know they won’t
come in here

Busi : are we allowed to ?

Me : if only there’s a need , and
we need rules

Their intense stares send me

laughing

Me : you cannot walk in here

with shoes , and you can’t step
there where the shrine is at .
You kneel down when you go
near there , and you cannot
light my candles whatsoever .
Do not enter in here , if you
have been busy with a man or
woman whatsoever and had sex
. If you watched porn and
masturbated , stay away from
this room . Wether you
cummed or not , sexual
activities mean staying away
from here . And don’t come in
here drunk

Busi : wow

Asiphe : it is understood
Me : let’s go eat

We walk out , I close the door

We put on our shoes going into

the kitchen

Me : we need groceries , we
can’t be stuffing our faces with
take outs everyday
We laugh , each grabbing a box
of the burger

We have already served the

guards and the driver
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Winnie : you were serious about
this ?

Me : babe stop
She sighs

This is nagging now , and it’s

annoying

When a woman is nagging ,

there’s nothing appealing about
that

Me : I am going to eat , I’ll see

you
Winnie : just like that ?

Me : do you want me to drag

you along with ?

Winnie : Drag ? Why would you

even drag me to begin with ?

Me : okay , listen I am hungry . I

have been cooped up in my
apartment , like the whole day
Winnie : I don’t know , it’s fine
go . I will just go to my room ,
call me when you need pussy

I laugh

She clicks her tongue walking

away

Me : yeah , I love you

She shows me her middle finger

I get in the car shaking my head

with a slight laughter

I drive off to Menlyn mall

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I am so done acting like a
mother to Thonga

He made it clear , I am not his

mother
Honestly , if his parents know
he’s left varsity

And they’re okay with that

Then I shouldn’t care

I just love him enough , to want

to see him doing better

And having a bright future

Because right now on this path
he’s on

I don’t see what future he even

has

Never mind it being bright

I don’t see him making a career

out of this modelling thing he
does
And what about the drugs he
snorts ?

Honestly , Thonga is now living

just for the sake of living

He doesn’t look forward to

anything in life

I don’t even know why I love

him this much
Because he has changed a lot

He’s no longer the Thongalethu

I fell in love with in High school

I barely even recognise the

person that he is today

He’s rude towards me , and

barely even addresses me as a
human being
He doesn’t even address me like
I’m his girlfriend

It’s like I’m just some random

hoe

Honestly it hurts

And I just wish , I could forget

about him
Stop loving him , and just move
on with life

Lona : you don’t look okay

She says as I walk in

She’s laying on the bed

Me : I am fine
I don’t want to tell her what just
happened

Because I know she’s going to

judge me

And call me the fool she’s

always calling me

So best I just shut my mouth

and say absolutely nothing
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Me : I think we got everything

Busi : yeah , we might have

gone overboard

I look at Asiphe

Me : you think so too ?

She smiles
Asiphe : I didn’t do groceries at
the palace , I really wouldn’t
know . But the groceries do look
like it’s a lot

I laugh

Me : you should know here ,

because you’re the one using
the kitchen
Busi : we shall see , but there’s
also 6 men in that house . So I
think it’s fine

Me : more

Now I have a good reason to

believe there’s more guards
around

I have never gone anywhere

with just a driver
Even though he is trained , and
carries guns like them

But he’s never alone , there’s

always a guard

Here , they’ve never followed

me

We left them at home

yesterday , and we came back
They were still there

We left again today , no one

followed

I know my father

There’s guards in the shadows

Me : you said you’re craving ice

cream , go get it
Asiphe : you don’t want some ?

I shake my head

Busi : I would love some

Me : I actually want tea , just

black plain tea

They laugh
Honestly , it’s no joke carrying
an ancestor

Because you be craving things

such as tea

And back label

Worse , I have two within me

A male and female

I was initiated by my uncle
Jongikhaya , when I was 16

So for 4 years , I have been a

traditional healer

But there’s also the love for

medicine

And well , that’s why I am

studying medicine
I will just have to find the
balance between the two

How ?

I also don’t know

But my guides have permitted

me to do this

So , I think it will work out just

fine
I maybe be young physically yes

But I am an old soul , and

carrying old souls

Me : okay , you go head I’ll wait

here

They walk towards the ice

cream shop
I am in plain sight , so I know I
am safe

Even though I’m left alone , and

not with them

As I am busy pressing my phone

, out of nowhere I just get this
cold breeze

I shiver like hell

And mind you , the sun is
blazing hot and out

I close my eyes , as my ears ring

the sound of water following

Definitely from a river

I open my eyes and look around

I see nothing
Well , until I spot eyes with this
guy

He’s staring at me

I’m just thinking , I hope I didn’t

cause a scene

But people are minding their

business

He’s the only one looking at me

I don’t know why , but I walk
towards him . It’s like I am out
of it

He doesn’t move , instead he

focuses his eyes elsewhere

I get to him

Me : uhm hi ….
Him : please , take your fake
prophecies very far away from
me

And right next to him , appears

this old man in leopard skin

He looks at me and smiles with

a nod

Me : you will live to fulfil the

duty of your great great
grandfather , there’s no running
away from it . Trust me , this is
not you acting out . The drugs
and disobedience , all this has
nothing to do with your parents
separating . Your carry forces
and spirits within you , that are
not tired of your ignorance .
You will self destruct if you
don’t listen

Him : shut up …
Me : your parents shared and
suffered pain together , loosing
three kids can take a toll on
anyone . They couldn’t heal
each other , because each one
was focusing on their own pain .
Forgetting they had to hold
each other , to get through pain
. In their failure , yes they failed
you . Because you lost your
home , to the deaths of your
siblings and the pain it brought .
But your anger is just misplaced
, your great great grandfather is
loosing his patience with you .
Even yoh know you don’t care
that much about the separation
of your parents , but you just
can’t help yourself and be this
angry . It’s too much , tone it
down a notch ….

Him : I said ….

I turn and walk away from him

Meeting Busi and Asiphe

Busi : are you okay ?

Me : yes , let’s go

The cold breeze disappears ,

and I feel fine now as we head
to the car

Just slightly confused

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 06*
*A WEEK LATER*
*Thongalethu*
After that beautiful weird
awkward girl said what she said

I haven’t been myself

I feel like I am insane

Some days it’s like I am just
suffocating

I haven’t been home

But now , I feel like I just need

to get away from my
environment

I had my shoot today

As much as I did my best

I felt like I was forcing myself
the whole time I was in there

That girl messed with my head ,

with those things she said

Like , did she have to be that

beautiful and so disturbing at
the same time ?

It’s fucking insane

I am really not a fan of beads ,
and those animal print cloths
they wear

Everything about those people

doesn’t make any sense at all

Honestly , the whole thing is

just nonsense to me

The dead are dead

There’s no such thing as , they
come back and demand shit
from the living

These people are possessed ,

and by something very big

I shouldn’t have met that girl

And I wouldn’t be here

But I know my mother won’t
kick me out

I drive in , and seeing only

Zweli’s car

I heave a sigh

She must not be home

But what the hell ?

I am here now

I park my car and get out

I knock before letting myself in

He walks down the stairs in just

shorts

Sweating like crazy , he must

have been doing a workout . He
has a gym upstairs
Me : that better be from a work
out

He laughs

Zweli : I am many things , but

definitely not a cheater . And I
wouldn’t be so stupid , doing
that in my wife’s home

I scoff
Me : where is my mom ?

Zweli : she went out , she’ll be

back soon

I say nothing heading to my

room

I lock the door , taking out the

small sachet of white powder
I must have this

Otherwise , I will not survive my

mother coming at me
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I will choke on this smoke

Like this room is full of incense

I haven’t had peace since I met
that guy

His great great grandfather ,

doesn’t wanna leave me

I don’t even know what he

wants

I have been trying to talk to him

But there’s nothing

Even my guides , they’re not

saying anything

Yet I have this soul that’s

following me around

But the fact that he’s not heavy

on them

It means he brings no harm

I am just finding it weird

Because now lectures have

started

And I can’t keep having him

following me around

One day , he will make me loose

it
And I’ll make a spectacle of
myself in public

If only there was an easy way to

understand this

Or get to the bottom of it

I get up , placing my cloth down

Just tying blue one on my waist

I leave the candles burning , as
well as the incense
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
We hug , and pull out

She looks so beautiful , and I

must say I missed her very
much

Me : how are you ?

Khosi : trying

Me : I am sorry , if things were

so easy . I would have long
taken him , but he doesn’t want
me

She sighs

Thongalethu really doesn’t get

along with me , we do not have
that father and son relationship
at all

He thinks with the separation ,

and getting a divorce

I abounded them

Which is not true

But he has his own mind made

up , and he’s not changing it
It’s hard to say or convince him
of anything

Me : this boy has been out of

control , whatever I do or say .
Please let it be , he now needs
this tough love if he’s not going
to be a child

She heaves another sigh

I have a tough and strict hand
more than she does

Right now I can tell she looks

worried

Wondering what will I do or say

Khosi : are you going to the

hotel , or you’re coming with ?

I smile
Me : if I go to the hotel , you
won’t be coming with

Khosi : Mtwana , just stop

I place my hand on her waist

Me : stop what ?

She says nothing

I lean down

Khosi : wait .....

I shut her up with a kiss , and

her lips grace mine as we
passionately kiss

After a while we pull out

Khosi : we need to stop this

It comes out as a whisper

Me : it’s been years , you need

to stop telling me to stop . I long
told you when you were a
teenager , we will never be loyal
to anyone

Khosi : what about Zweli and

Swazi ?

Me : are they here ?

She sighs

Me : I am not going to file that

marriage to be legalized

Khosi : what ?

Me : me and you know what we

are , with Swazi I don’t know

She pops her eyes

I am married , but there’s
nothing on paper

And it will remain that way

Me : you have my hotel room

and key , do let yourself in
whenever you feel like

I hold her hand , heading to the

car
Me : let’s go , call him to come
over . Or is he home ?

She shakes her head

Khosi : he’s at the apartment

I sigh

Khosi : Now I wish I never kept

that apartment
She just didn’t want to let go of
the apartment

Even after we got married

She kept saying my father

bought her that apartment , so
it’s very close to her heart

But now , Thongalethu is

seriously using this wrongly
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : hey

He looks up and smiles

I am not even guilt stricken by

the fact that I left him here ,
and went to pick Bayede at the
airport
Not only did we kiss like that in
public

But he gave me such an orgasm

with his fingers driving here

Honestly , I don’t know what we

need to do for this to stop

We just couldn’t stay together ,

married as a couple
But we still had sex and all

I thought moving on from that

would help

We got married , but still

nothing has changed

It was a shock for me to find out

he’s not legally married to Swazi
, I did not see that one
Me : I am back , Bayede is here

Zweli : good for him , Thonga is

also home

Me : he is ?

He nods

Me : wow , I hope we can find a

way really
Zweli : go talk to him first , you
never told him Zulu was going
to come here

I didn’t because I know my son

And he was just going to act out

, like for no reason at all

Me : baby , thank you so much

He smiles

Zweli : for what now ?

Me : uhm ….for everything ,

sticking with me through it all .
If it was another man , they
wouldn’t stand for this . They
would have long left , but
you’re still here . I appreciate
you so much
He holds his hand out

Zweli : come here

I walk to him and take his hand ,

sitting on his lap

Zweli : I love you

Me : I love you more

He leans over and we hug

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 07*
*Thongalethu*
I open the door for her

I look so much better now

I know she won’t even tell I was

high or anything like that
Mom : hi

Me : Mom

Mom : have you eaten ?

I shake my head

Mom : okay , come join us

Me : in a minute
Mom : we have a guest

Me : don’t worry about me , I

will shut my mouth and just
behave

I turn from the door heading to

the bathroom

I wash my face with cold water

Just to wake myself enough

I walk out , drying my face

I grab my phone walking out

And I stop on my tracks as I

walk in the dinning room

And my father is here

They all look at me

Me : you didn’t have to call him
here , we’re not broken .
Nothing needs fixing

He gets on his feet

Mom : Bayede ….

I swallow hard , as I can’t

comprehend his hard stare
Me : anyways thanks for dinner
, I am not hungry anymore

Mom : oh Thongalethu please

….your father is ….

Me : he is no father of mine , he
left us and chose his life away
from us . He forgot he’s a father
when he gave up on his family
and making it work
Mom : we lost three kids
together with your father , not
one but three . After Nkanyezi
was born , I got pregnant . But I
was going through a tough time
, I bled in the bathtub and lost
that baby . Then we had you ,
after you came another child
that we lost before he or she
was born . You were just three
years old when Nkanyezi passed
away , we couldn’t take it
anymore . The pain was just too
much , and our marriage took a
knock . We both decided ,
seeing it wasn’t working but we
brought each other nothing but
pain . We decided to part ways ,
it was mutual agreement . Your
father didn’t walk out on us

I look down

It hurts me , that out of all the

kids they were going to have
Only I made it

I understand why she’s crying

And it’s clear , I am not making

anything easier

Dad : spare yourself the pain for

Thongalethu

He is angry
Dad : are you going to tell us
why you are not longer going to
Varsity ?

Me : I am busy with work ,

Varsity is just not for me

Dad : oh so you’re working now

, that’s good . At least you’re
taking responsibility of your
actions . Which is why I am
renting out that apartment ,
you need to move out

Me : what ?

My mother looks down

She clearly doesn’t know about

this

Dad : a man that’s working ,

surely can make his own money
Me : I don’t make enough
money to get a place

Dad : then go back to school ,

it’s simple like that

He’s fucking with me no lies

Dad : and since you’re working ,

I am going to give you your car
papers . You will pay for your
car , and get insurance for
yourself . I’ve cancelled the one
I got for you , so yeah do pay
your dues

The fuck !

Like where am I supposed to

find an extra R2 000 for
insurance every month ?

This is crazy
And he pays R6 000 for that car
, every month

That’s like 8K gone

Dad : and forget about the

three allowances you have been
getting from us , you’re working
and you have money

I am fucked
Me : right , yeah do what you
do best . Cutting me off , you’re
used to that

He chuckles

Shit !

This is not working , I won’t

even get to him with my words
Dad : you cannot bullshit a
bullshiter my son . Figure
yourself out , independence
screams and feels like this

He goes back to his chair and

sits down

Me : mom ?

She says nothing

I guess I am cut off

This is fucked up

Why did they call him here ?

Like my father is something else

, and he doesn’t back down
from what he starts
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Bayede : I know you think I was
hard , but it’s for the best

He left to go get his things at

the apartment

Me : the financial strain , he

won’t be able to handle it

He smiles
Bayede : you’re thinking like a
mother right now , that’s fine .
But Thongalethu needs this

I heave a sigh

Bayede : look at the bright side ,

he is coming back home
because he has no place to stay

Oh well , I guess
Bayede : he will soon realise ,
just how much of a child he is .
And how he needs his family

Me : I hope you’re right about

this

Bayede : Thonga is not the first

child to act out , nor will he be
the last . But it doesn’t mean we
should just turn a blind eye to
that , or allow him to be and
keep saying he will get better

I nod

Bayede : let me go

Me : how long are you staying ?

Bayede : a week

I smile with a nod

Me : okay

Bayede : you’re free to come by

I chuckle

It doesn’t even matter to deny ,

because I know I will find myself
in his hotel room . So I won’t
even say nothing about that
He gets into the car , I walk back
inside

He rented a car , and asked for

it to be brought here

Zweli : hey

I smile with a heavy heart

I get on him , straddling him

placing a kiss on his lips
Zweli : you know he wasn’t hard
to punish him right ?

I nod

Zweli : it’s going to be okay

Me : babe , I hope so

He engulfs me into a hug

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Me : baby what’s going on ?

Thonga : I am packing

Me : well I can see that , but

why ?

Thonga : because I am going

back home
Me : why ?

He sighs

Thonga : why what ?

Me : like why are you moving ?

Thonga : I can’t deal with your

questions right now , at least be
useful and help around
Me : will I get to see you ?

Thonga : I haven’t even thought

about that , right now I’m faced
with changes . A lot is on my
mind , and you’re asking me if
you’ll be able to see me

Honestly when he’s home , he

just tends to ghost me
Now I am worried of what this
might mean for us

Its just more less time , and him

having excuses all the time he
has to see me

I wonder what happened , for

him to move back home

Because he’s been living in this

apartment for like 3 years
And now he’s moving back
home , just like that

Me : I have to go to class

Thonga : you can leave

Of course

He won’t even beg me to stay

or anything like that
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 08*
*Thongalethu*
When my father says something

You pay attention

Because that man doesn’t shit

He doesn’t bluff

When he says something , he

really means it

He doesn’t kid no one

Mom : you’re back ?

Ah !
This is embarrassing

Me : I don’t have a place to say ,

your baby daddy is renting the
apartment

She smiles

Mom : you’re working , and

making money . You can afford
to find a place yourself
Me : what ?

Mom : yes

Me : you cannot be serious right

now , it’s expensive to rent

Mom : for unemployed varsity

students , that’s why their
parents support them

Wow !
Me : he put you up to this right
?

Mom : he is your father , he’s

letting you be the man you
want to be

Me : yeah well , he deserted me

and still is even now . And now
you’re supporting him , it’s fine
. I’ll be out of your hair too
I walk out , and head into my
car driving out

I am an idiot

Fuck ! I know that

Where am I going ? Cause I

know I cannot afford a place to
rent . That’s why I should have
gone home
Finding a place to sleep is hard

Most of the motels and BnB’s

around are full

Me : great !

I park by on the side of the car

I will just have to see the night

through
I can’t even call Winnie , cause
she’s sharing with that Lona

And I know bitch fucking hates

me

It’s just shit

Now I am so close to being a

hobbo , sleeping in my car is
getting closer there
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I tie my blue lion cloth on my
head

Making sure that I have all my

things

I do not want a repeat of the

other day again
I am always packing

I walk out , heading to the

kitchen

Me : good morning

They greet back

I sit down , grabbing a bowl of

cereal
Me : how is your day looking
like ?

Busi : two lectures

Me : not bad , I have about 4

Busi : I will stick around

Me : you don’t have to , I won’t

be alone anyways
Busi : are you sure ?

Me : yes

She smiles

Busi : okay

We eat

And when we’re done , we bid

Asiphe goodbye
Simo drives us

Me : wait ….

I say to the driver , as we pass a

car parked by on the side of the
road

Me : stop the car

Busi : what’s wrong ?

Simo stops the car , behind this
one

I get out of the car , rushing to

the other car

I knock on the window

Quite a few times , that even

Simo and Busi get out of the car
I open the door , and it opens

The line of white powder on the

dashboard is what catches my
eyes first

I dart my eyes to the guy

And I can’t believe this !

Now wonder , I just acted like a

crazy woman
Because it’s him

I don’t like my guides very much

right now

He lifts his head

Him : what do you want ? Who

said you can open my car ?

I move back a bit

Me : I am sorry , I didn’t know it
was you . I’m sorry

He chuckles annoyed

Him : yeah well get away

He pulls the door closing it

I feel that cold breeze again

I lift my eyes , looking to the
other side of the car

And I see the old man again

He shakes his head , looking

very disappointed

He turns and walks away

I also turn back to the car

Me : I am sorry , we can go

I get in the car , they follow suit

Simo drives off

Busi : are you okay ?

Me : yes

I reach for my bag

Busi : who was that ?

Me : I don’t know yet

I take out my snuff and smoke

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
I take out my phone and call her
It rings for a while , she doesn’t
answer

I drop the call and dial her again

Winnie : babe

Me : finally !

She sighs
Me : are you ignoring me ? Like
are we fighting ?

Winnie : I have to go to my
lesson now , what is it ?

Me : well , I need a shower

Winne : what ?

Me : yhoh ! Babe , it’s such a

long story
Winnie : you’re not making
sense right now

Me : I know , but you have

lessons . And well , I just need a
shower

Winnie : I am not even at my

room

Me : come on !
She sighs

Me : fine just leave it

Winnie : I …..

I drop the call

She calls again , I ignore her

calls
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Swazi : how is it going there ?

Me : just fine

Swazi : really ?

Me : yes
Swazi : baby , give me details .
How is your son ?

I am not in the mood for this

Me : I don’t care to know , until

he’s ready to be a child

Swazi : what does that even

mean ?
Me : it means he’s being given
real life lessons , and he will live
however he chooses

Swazi : I hope whatever you’re

doing there , it doesn’t alienate
him further from you

Me : I am being a parent right

now , and not his friend

Swazi : okay , I have to get going

Me : alright

Swazi : Thanks for checking in ,

I’ll call after my meeting . I love
you

Me : I love you too

I drop the video call , just as

Khosi walks out of the shower
Me : I wish you weren’t leaving

She smiles

Khosi : Zweli will be back some

time during the day , he has to
find me home . He knows I am
not working today

I heave a sigh , walking closer to

her . I place my hands on her
waist
I peck her lips , and she pulls me
in for a deeper kiss

Me : let me just hit one round

She laughs pulling out of the

kiss

Khosi : if I give in , I will not walk

out of this hotel room
Me : you can be such a pussy
blocker at times

I move over taking the lotion

lotioning her

When I’m done she picks her

clothes and put them on

I pull her close , capturing her

lips into mine
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 09*
*Rain*
This old man is peaceful

As much as he is not at peace

and all

But he is peaceful

I now know that he brings me

no harm
His connection is with that guy

I just wish I knew what he wants

from me

Because now , he has disturbed

the spirit of Ngwe

I haven’t been able to access

nor connect with my male guide
Since this man appeared

It’s worrying me

Because I can’t keep his spirit ,

without a reason

I can’t even call home

I don’t want my father worried

I don’t want to bother my uncle
either

I am not an initiate , but a

healer

And on some things , I really do

need to stand up for myself

I think this is one of those

If not , and all fails

Then I will gladly seek help from
those before me

I walk out of the room I’ve

turned into my ancestral abode

I have been staying away from

Busi and the others

Just trying to gather myself

Nothing much

Sometimes when things get a

lot

I just prefer to be on my own

Away from the noises , and

people

I have those guides who just

cannot stand noise
Well , unless they’re the ones
making the noise

Then all is well

I use the kitchen door going out

into the garden

This is one feature , that this

house has
That’s very much peaceful

I prefer nature to calm down

And right now , I think that’s

what I need

I cannot just ignore this man

I have to know exactly who he is

, and what exactly does he want
from me
Or that guy

A peaceful space is what will do

it

Busi is buried in her books ,

Asiphe is trying new recipes

So I might as well use my time ,

to do something that will
benefit me
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : you’re leaving ?

I knew he was leaving , but now

I am sad

It’s just crazy

He smiles
Bayede : what I came here for is
done

I don’t know about that

Honestly what we did , felt like

we just rejected our son

Me : he hasn’t called , he still

hasn’t come back
Bayede : this is called tough
love

Me : tough ….

I shake my head with a heavy

sigh

Me : what if he turns up dead ?

Bayede : no such thing will

happen
Me : we live in an unpredictable
world

Bayede : you worry too much ,

and that’s why Thongalethu
puts you through so much
stress

Me : it’s my duty as a mother to

worry
Bayede : I am not doing this ,
because I don’t love him . He’s
my son just as much , but at the
end of the day he’s still a child

I sigh

This won’t get us anywhere

Like father like son

There’s no difference
Bayede : do you regret me
coming ?

What kind of a question is that

?

He’s just being awkward right

Me : no , of course not

He sighs
Bayede : I don’t want us to not
be on the same page about this

Me : I just feel bad

Bayede : and you think he’s

feeling the same where he is ?

I sigh

I doubt he feels bad

He’s probably out there
partying a storm

Me : it’s okay ……I

I sigh

Bayede : you don’t want to give

up on him , and I understand
that . It’s not like I am giving up
on him too MaKhumalo
Me : I know

Bayede : I will be in touch , and

I’ll come when needed

Me : okay

Bayede : I have to go now

Me : travel safe
Bayede : I will , he won’t go
quite forever . Just trust that

I nod

We slightly hug , he gets into

the car and drives out

I head back inside the house

Honestly I don’t believe

anything he said right now
I’m yearning for my son

I just can’t help wondering if

he’s eaten

If he’s okay , and he’s warm

enough

I honestly just can’t help myself

Zweli walks in
And laying his eyes on me , he
heaves a sigh

Me : I am sorry about
everything , I am sure this is not
the type nor the kind of
marriage you anticipated or saw
yourself in

He smiles , and walks closer to

where I am seated
Zweli : one day at a time , I’ll
keep saying until you get it

I smile

Me : can we go out , just us .

Have dinner , and wine

He chuckles
Me : we haven’t had a date in
like forever

Zweli : let me just fresh up

Me : thank you

He leans down and we kiss

I don’t know what I did to

deserve this man
But I am very much grateful

We pull out of the kiss , and lock

eyes

Zweli : I love you

Me : I love you too baby

He moves back removing his

clothes
Me : Bayede left today , he
came to say goodbye . I don’t
know how this will unfold

Zweli : give it time

I nod slowly , and he walks

upstairs

I lay back down on the couch

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
For two days

I have been calling and all

But he’s not answering my calls

nor responding my texts

And he just blue ticks me on

WhatsApp
Since he moved from his
apartment , I have no idea
where he is

I asked Musa , and he said

absolutely nothing

He surely must be upset

wherever he is

He’s never been the type to beg

of even grovel to anyone
And if he’s angry , he will cut
you off and life just goes on

Thonga is just a human being

that’s just in his own world
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 10*
*Thongalethu*
Musa : that was a well done job

I chuckle

Musa : are you finally going to

tell me where you’re cruising ?

Me : no

He sighs
Musa : honestly , this becomes
a problem when I have to get a
hold of you . And you’re not
even paying attention to your
phone

Me : give it rest will you , I

showed up for the shoot . What
makes you think , you won’t
find me for the next ?

He says nothing picking his beer

Me : I’m coming

I get up and head towards the

door

I walk out and head to my car

Someone bumps into me

And no doubt , the powder that

I had in hand drops to the floor
The packet wasn’t that closed ,
cause I wanted to come have a
few lines

Me : what the fuck ?

I lift my eyes angry as hell

And I’m just more pissed seeing

who it is
Lona : Thonga I am sorry ,
please forgive me . It was a
mistake really

Me : do you have any idea how

much that costs ?

Lona : I can’t afford to replace

that , but I’ll do whatever you
want I promise . Whatever you
want
Me : whatever I want ?

Lona : yes ……yes

I chuckle

Me : okay well , let me fuck you

. Right here right now

I push her against my car , lifting

her dress up
I slide my hand down inside her
panty

She parts her legs , picking up

her breath

I part her pussy lips with my

finger , she lets out a moan as I
rub on her clit

Lona : oh my God ! Fuck , yes

I slide my hand down , going to
her open

And I finger fuck her

She looses herself , in pleasure

Lona : oh shit ! I can’t believe

this is happening ….fuck ! I’ve
always wondered how it’ll feel
like …..to have you fuck me ,
guess it’s my luck day
I chuckle

Increasing the pleasure on her

clit

As her moans increase I move

back sliding my hand out

Lona : what ….what , I was so

close
Me : fuck off , you think you’ll
drop my shit . And I’ll reward
you with sex for that ? I’ve
always known you’re such a
whore , Winnie shouldn’t trust
you . You’re capable of killing
her , don’t think I’ve never
noticed your stupid hate
towards me was because you
wanted me . And that’s why
you’re always so negative to her
about me , she may be naïve
but I’m not stupid
She swallows fixing her dressed

Looking all embarrassed

Lona : please …uhm don’t tell

Winnie this

Me : why ? You don’t want her

with me , because you want me
. Too bad , I’ll never even look
at you twice
I grab her , and push her off my
car

Lona : you don’t have to be so

mean

Me : hey ! I am coming for my

5K , and you better have it
ready when I come . Or else I’ll
fucking finish you , you best
believe that
I get into my car and drive off to
the hotel

I ended up finding a room ,

because staying in the car just
wasn’t happening
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I find myself here

And I don’t even know what I

will say

He will flip when he finds out

His mother opens the door

Me : Mrs Ndlovu

Mrs Ndlovu : yes ?

5 years being with that guy ,
and no one is his family knows
about me

Except his cousins

But he’s never brought me to

his parents

And he preferred me at his

apartment
More than his parents home

Me : my name is Winnie , and I

know you don’t know me …..but
uhm , I am here about
Thongalethu

Mrs Ndlovu : come in

I walk inside
And this is the door leading to
the kitchen

She doesn’t move further

We sit right on the high chairs

I am so scared

Mrs Ndlovu : what’s wrong ?

I sigh
Me : I am sorry to show up in
your house like this , but it’s
because I am worried . And now
it’s been almost a week , not
seeing him . I don’t even know
where he is

Mrs Ndlovu : you’re his

girlfriend ?

I look down
Me : yes , I am

Mrs Ndlovu : well I see , sorry if

I’m going to sound anyhow . But
Thongalethu knows what he
needs , he’s not a child anymore
. He’s 23 , and acting like he’s
15 . Now the fact that , you
don’t know where he is . Means
he also doesn’t want you to
know where he is , don’t bother
yourself about such a man .
You’ll literally be wasting your
time with my son . The second
he knows what he wants , he
will definitely ditch you . If he
loved you , or even cared
enough . He would have let you
know where he is , and what’s
going on

Wow

Those are some harsh words

Me : maybe something
happened to him

Mrs Ndlovu : no , nothing

happened to him . He’s
perfectly fine

My phone rings

Me : Sorry …
Mrs Ndlovu : it’s fine , take it

Lona lacks timing

Me : hey

Lona : I am sorry to be the one

to tell you this , but Thonga was
partying a storm last night . And
he even ended up with a girl in
the parking lot , just imagine
that . Don’t be shocked if you
suddenly see a video of them , I
mean I don’t know how many
people saw what they were
doing

I drop the call

A lump getting stuck on my

throat

So his mother is right , he’s

perfectly fine
The fool is me

Like how can he do this to me ?

After everything
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I was very unsettled with the
dream that I had just after my
3Am session

I couldn’t go back to sleep

So I came in here , just to calm

nerves and all

And to maybe get some clarity

on it
I have incense burning

My three candles are on

I only use 3 candles , not more

than that

The blue , yellow and white

The blue representing my

paternal side
The yellow representing my
maternal side

And the white , is where they

connect and meet upon me

So the white is always in the

middle of the candles

I have the more apostolic spirit ,

that’s the blue and the white
Because I connect more with
water

Than I do with the Zionist spirit ,

the yellow and green

I look at my candles as they’re

burning

And I’m aiming to read them ,

and hopefully I will get the
meaning of my dream
A few minutes just watching the
candles burn , they start to
react

And the message I get from it ,

sends shivers down my spine.
Like how can this even be
possible ? Its not foreign to me
, considering that my father and
Ngwe are also one but he’s
royalty . And king to his own
kingdom , this I’ve never seen
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 11*
*A MONTH LATER*
*Rain*
I had Simo just drive out with
me today

I haven’t been myself lately

Right now , I am regretting the
decision to so ever come here

Like , I badly wish I didn’t

And maybe I should just forget

this whole thing

I should just go back home

Because things that are
happening here , they’re just
beyond me

I haven’t been myself

Like one dream keeps bothering

me day and night

I have tried to do my best , to

get answers
But every time , I get the same
answer

And I don’t even know how to

go about it

Like my bones , candles and

water all say the same thing

One thing that’s painful about

having ancestors within you
Is that when you start
misbehaving and all

And they feel like you’re not

listening

They come down so hard on

you like a ton on bricks

Which is what will befall that

guy
His grandfather has had enough

And the thing is , he won’t kill

him

He will make him suffer until he

realises the destruction of his
ways , but he’s do oblivious and
ignorant . He doesn’t get it at all

Simo : is that ….
I look at him , but realise he’s
slowing down

Looking on the side of the road

Almost on the same spot , there

he is

I don’t know , but the way I just

shiver

I know this
This has been my dream for the
past month

I so badly want to ignore him ,

but then again that would be
me being disobedient

Me : stop the car , come help

me

He stops the car

And we get out rushing to the
other car

How stupid again !

He didn’t lock the doors

And he’s just parked , passed

out on the side of the road

Me : oh my god !
He has his head bowed down ,
and there’s just white foam
everywhere

Me : Simo !

Simo : overdose , we have to

rush him to the hospital

Me : no , let’s take him home

Simo : but ….

Me : trust me on this

He sighs and picks the guy out

of the car going to our car ,
carrying him in his arms

I look around his car , just for

anything that might be
important
And I find like two sports bags in
the car

It’s definitely clothes

I see there’s his ID , drivers

licence and his bank cards

I grab everything , and lock the

car leaving it there

I get in the car

Putting the bags in the back
seat down

Me : please make it home fast

He nods and drives off stepping

on the accelerator
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : it’s been a month , it marks
over 5 weeks

He sighs

Me : I don’t know , maybe

something really happened to
him

Zweli : there is no such thing as

that
I tried to be ignorant

But now it has been for too long

The worry is getting the best of

me

Me : maybe I need to start

going out there , and looking for
him . He hasn’t been active
online , for two weeks
Zweli : babe I don’t know , but
whatever you decide I will
support you

I sigh , with a slight nod

Now I am more worried than

I’ve ever been

Maybe I am reaping what I sow

I wasn’t exactly the best child to
my parents

And look where I am as a

mother

I always thought my mother

failed me , but now I am sure
my own son feels the same

I guess I am not different to my

mother
And I got a child , that is exactly
how I was but way much more
worse

This is the universe way

What I did as a child to my

parents , it’s coming back to me
now ten times
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : maybe he should be in
hospital

I turn and look at her , she looks

very scared

Busi : all I’m saying is that he

looks very bad
Me : I have to wait for him to
wake up , then I will summon
his ancestors for him . So they
can come and save him , then
he will vomit all of this

Busi : in hospital they will drain

him

Me : I have my ways , please

leave us
She gets up

Busi : shouldn’t we inform his

family ? Like we don’t even
know who he is

Me : he will wake up , and know

his way back home

She walks out

I understand her worry and all

We don’t know this guy , and
honestly I have no idea how
long he’s going to be
unconscious for

I hope he will wake up sooner

rather than later
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*

Lona : still hung up on Thonga ?

Me : what do you mean hung

up ? We never broke up
Lona : and you haven’t seen nor
heard from him in so long

I sigh

Lona : you’re enjoying being

hurt and purposely so

She grabs her bag and walks out

, with a click of the tongue
I don’t think she will ever
understand just how hard
things are for me right now

Having not heard anything from

Thonga , and not seeing him . It
hasn’t been easy

There was no video shared

So I guess not everyone saw

what Lona was talking about
And that’s another thing that
hurt me so much

Like the thought of Thonga

disappearing like this , and only
for it to turn out that he’s with
another girl . And I’ve been
worried sick about him

Love truly hurts

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 12*
*Rain*
Busi : he looks bad

Me : it’s after effects , and

withdrawals

Busi : he’s going to live right ?

I nod

She is so scared it’s funny

Busi : good , because my
princess we cannot have this
stranger guy die here . Like that
cannot happen at all

I know that , that would literally

be my end

But since he came here , his

grandfather has been here as
well
Surely he wouldn’t bring one of
his own to die in my hands

Even Ngwe wouldn’t have

allowed that

Me : he won’t die , don’t worry

She sighs

Busi : he’s shaking bad

Me : there’s nothing I can do
about that , he needs to wake
up

This room is already heating up

like crazy

And it’s disturbing me

Cause my guides are not one

with heat
Ngwe actually hates it

Every time I do anything that

has to do with them

Be it a ceremony or going to the

waterfall

It always rains like hell , even if

it was sunny minutes ago
Or it gets cold , to an extent of
shivering

This heat , is not good for me at

all

But I know I have to help this

guy

So I am just enduring

Me : you can leave , it’s okay

She smiles

Busi : thought you’ll never say

I slightly laugh as she walks out

I sigh sitting down

I grab my phone and call my

sister
After a few rings she answers

Linani : baby

I smile with tears streaming

down my face

Linani : baby what’s wrong ?

Me : I think I want to come back

home
Linani : what happened ?

Me : it’s just a lot , I don’t think I

will survive in this place . It’s
just hard for me to fit in ,
there’s always things . Even at
school , there’s tons of kids .
You know it’s a lot of spirits ,
aura’s and energies . I really
can’t focus

She sighs
Linani : don’t cry , Ngwe was
okay with you leaving . Have
you communicated , and asked
why they’re not letting you
blend in ?

Me : maybe this was just some

test , for me to see that I can
never be myself unless I am
home
Linani : you know we love you ,
and we support you in whatever
you do . And if you want to
come back home , then you’re
welcome to . No one will
question you about that , and
don’t settle also . If you feel the
situation isn’t for you , it’s fine
you have tried . So don’t best
yourself up , and don’t feel
anyhow at all

I wipe my tears off

Me : I ….I will call uncle , I don’t
know . But I really think I should
come back , and just forget
everything . Honestly even
school is not working out for me

Linani : and this is the only

reason right ?

Me : what do you mean ?

Linani : they’re not mistreating
you there right ? Or excluding
you , because of your beads and
cloths ?

I smile

Me : no , others of course talk .

But I don’t care about that

People will always talk , criticize

you . But I know who I am
Linani : okay , if coming home is
what you want . I’ll talk to Zitha
, and we’ll come get you

My siblings are just the best

I can always rely on them for

everything

Even before going to my

parents
Me : get yourself ready to come
take me home , I can’t deal with
this place . I just can’t ….

Voice : don’t go please …..I ….I

need you ….

I turn my eyes to him , and he’s

wide awake

Still shivering like crazy

Me : MaMpofu , I’ll call you
later

Linani : what ….

I drop the call

Me : you’re awake

Him : sh…..

Me : don’t swear in here

My voice is so stern , he must
never

Him : sorry

He tries to sit up

Me : don’t do that , you’re very

weak

Him : I am cold
Me : you have 5 blankets ,
there’s a heater . You’re
suffering withdrawals , that will
take a while . Until the drugs
are out of your system

Him : I am not an addict

Me : you think you’re not , just

because you thought you had
control over what you were
doing . Look at you now , an
overdose and you’re not an
addict

Him : I ....

He closes his eyes , and takes a

deep breath

He sounds and looks like he’s in

pain
Him : I just took …one too many
lines

Me : it’s okay , you’re just

feeling the wrath of your
ancestors . It’s really not that
you’re into drugs , or this rebel
behaviour you have

Him : you always speak things

that make no sense , and you’re
fuc….. sorry . I mean you’re too
beautiful for such things
I chuckle , grabbing the 5L
bucket

Along with the herbs to make

the mixture

Him : what’s your name ?

Me : Rain

Him : really ?
I nod

Him : okay , I feel like I am dying

. My bones hurt , my stomach
feelings like it’s breaking

I laugh

Me : your intestines are at work

Him : doesn’t make sense

Me : we will talk , now you have
to drink this

Him : what’s that ?

Me : your substitute remedy

He frowns

Him : what ?
Me : this is how we’ll pump the
drugs off your blood and system

He chuckles

Him : girl , no offence . But

you’re not a doctor

The tone is just off and mocking

Me : never said I was

Him : oh well , your people
cannot do everything that
western medicine does

Me : I am not even comparing

Him : so you expect me to

believe you’ll really take the
drugs out of my body ?

I chuckles again shaking his

head
The attitude of this guy is just
too much

He can’t even contain it

Me : few minutes ago you were

crying I shouldn’t leave , cause
you need me

He slightly laughs
Him : I was confused , thought I
was dreaming really . Like
you’re here , I’m here . You’re
like a ghost that just can’t get
away

Wow !

That time the ghost is the great

great great grandfather

That’s showing him flames

Me : wether you do this or not ,
I want you out of my house .
You need to go home , fix things
with your parents . And have
your father come back , so he
can help you

Him : uh ! I am homeless , and

my parents don’t want me

This is crazy
Me : are you doing this or not ?

Him : just because you’re so

beautiful , I really can’t think
anything bad about you

Me : after this , you’ll have to

steam

Him : eh ! You want to burn me

I pull the blankets off of him

Him : no wonder I’m in pain

This guy !

Him : you made me sleep on a

grass mat , there’s no bed

Me : the sooner you’re out of

here , the better
Him : I am enjoying this stay

Me : I am not …..take this

I help him to get up

Me : the bathroom is that way

He takes the bucket

Me : and if you don’t do it , I will

know
He smiles

Him : you seem to know a lot ,

and well . You might as well
come and watch me

Me : just go

He chuckles and walk to the

bathroom
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 13*
*Thongalethu*
I have never met such a savage
beautiful woman

Like in all my life

It felt like my insides were

coming out
And that steaming bath thing , it
had my skin feeling like it’s
burning

I’m in my pants , and shirtless

In this room.

I don’t care how clean it looks

But it’s still creepy

And to think I spent days in here

Is just insane

She walks in

She’s wearing these cloths of

hers

She looks cute in them

Just how she has them on , it’s
like a dress of some kind

Rain : let’s sit down

And we’re sitting down on the

floor

Why doesn’t she have chairs in

here ?

Like really ?
She lifts fresh new blue yellow
and white candles

She lights up the incense

And take out the black thing

I’m like , that’s snuff for old

people

What the hell ?

But damn , she takes the thing
and sprinkles it all over the
candles and incense

The shock , is when she starts

smoking it

Like really ?

She starts speaking in a

language I cannot make out
What she’s saying doesn’t make
sense

It’s like those fire fire people ,

speaking in tongues

It’s when she burps , and it’s

like the roar of a tiger

I feel like getting off my ass ,

and running out of this room
She darts her eyes to me

I want to run away

She goes back staring at her

candles

Rain : your great great great

grandfather is here

Who the hell is that ?

She starts clapping her hands
together

Rain : Mageba , Zulu omnyama

ondlela zimhlophe . Zulu ka
malandela , mtwana . Sthuli sika
Ndaba , Ndabezitha

This is creepy

I want to run
Like she just called our clan
names just like that

Rain : you have to go home , fix

things with your parents . Only
your father can help you with
this , everything that you have
done . And all that’s happening
to you , it’s because of your
grandparents . And your great
great great grandfather, who
feels neglected by his own .
Your grandfather ran away from
this , because his blood was
tainted by that of a royal beast
he didn’t understand . Your
ancestors are loosing their
patience with you and your
father .

She keeps quite and stares at

me

Me : okay wait ….first of all , I

don’t know this great person
you’re talking about . And my
grandfather died at 80 years ,
the man had nothing of this sort

Rain : you have no idea what

you’re talking about , your
parents will know about this .
Even your grandmother was
gifted . One thing about gifts ,
they don’t die with their owners
. They trail down from
generation to generation , your
parents have no other kids
living except you . And you shall
carry all this , because you have
taken your grandfather’s
tainted blood , you’re nothing
like a mere normal human
being . Continue in this way ,
and you will destruct . If you
think you just took too many
lines of drugs , you still don’t
understand that everything
you’re doing and happening is
pushed by forces
Me : it was just an overdose
really , I lost out on a great deal
that day . After a month of
things not going well , having no
place to stay . And my car being
repossessed ….anyways where
is my car by the way ?

Rain : repossessed , just be glad

I got there and took you .
Maybe they would have
repossessed you too
What the ….

Me : okay great ! Nice joke

Rain : no one can have such bad

luck

Me : apparently I do , and it has

nothing to do with all this

Rain : okay , and that’s why

you’re walking around with your
great great great grandfather’s
shadow

This is crazy

Rain : wether you believe me or

not , I don’t care . You’re okay
now , from what happened with
the drugs . As for everything
else , I can’t do nothing

She gets up
Me : wait ….

She looks at me

Me : you said something about

leaving

Rain : yeah

This one is savage to the core

Me : I don’t even know where
you’re going , but please don’t
go

Rain : what ?

Me : like ….

I shrug

She sighs
Rain : this place is just not for
me , because there’s too many
people like you

Me : wow ! That feels like some

shade

I get up

Me : uhm ….what will it take for

you not to leave ?
Rain : nothing

Me : not even helping me ?

Rain : I already told you what to

do , if you can’t there’s nothing
….

Me : I’ll go home , I’ll talk to my

parents and fix things . If that’s
what will take , so you don’t
leave
Rain : you’re fixing things for
your own good

Me : what’s the point if you

won’t be here ?

She looks at me confused

I will spell it out every soon , if

that’s what she wants
Me : uhm ….all I am asking is
that , please don’t go

Rain : what you’re asking

doesn’t make sense

Me : it’s fine , I’ll be stupid for

you . Please

She sighs

I’m begging right now

Rain : I don’t even know your
name

I chuckle

Me : I thought your lenses see

everything

Rain : you’ll use the room next

to this one , tomorrow I want
you gone
She opens the door

Me : Thongalethu

She turns and looks at me

Me : my name is Thongalethu

She smiles
Rain : with such a powerful
name , you think you’re like
everyone else

Great !

She walks out

I waste no time going out of this

creepy room too

My life is fucked up right now

Nothing has been going good
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Me : I am sorry , something just
needed my attention

Linani : you had me worried , I

almost called dad
Well , I am glad she didn’t

Because he would have gotten

here as in yesterday

Me : I am sorry , we will have to

revisit our talk another day

Is this me saying , I am staying

around because Thongalethu
asked
Well more like he was begging
me to not leave

I really don’t know about Joburg

anymore

Linani : no pressure , I will hear

from you

Me : okay , it’s been a long

draining day . Let me get some
sleep
Linani : okay , sleep well

Me : thank you , and you too . I

love you

She laughs

Linani : I love you more Bhabha

I drop the call

Hopefully I can get some sleep
tonight
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 14*
*Rain*
I had my whole family calling
me this morning

My parents and my siblings

People were so worried

All saying they’re just checking
up on me

Now without a doubt , I now

know Linani talked to them

I’m sure she didn’t say

everything I said

But she did tell them bits

That’s the only reason , they
would all be calling me

And I had the worrying talk with

my uncle

He was in riddles

But I think I understood him

It was all about this

Thongalethu that’s here
My uncle never misses anything

But I understand his worry and

all

Thongalethu inherited whatever

blood his grandfather carried

From the bite of whatever royal

legend bit him
And now , he has purposes to
serve

And he can only do that if he

knows truly who he is

And what he’s capable of

As well as accepting the gift of

healing from his great great
great grandfather
He still has a long way to go

I hope he is willing to take upon

it

But I am glad he’s leaving today

And hopefully , I will never see

him again

He needs to get his life in order

Or else , he will self destruct

I walk in the kitchen

And Busi is having tea

Me : good morning

Busi : my princess

I laugh
Me : until I am headed to the
grave

She takes a sip of her tea

Busi : he resurrected really ?

I laugh

This one is just dramatic , like

she thought Thonga will die
Me : worry not , he is leaving
today . We probably will never
see him again

Busi : it was strange and

awkward

I laugh sitting down

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
I got some nice treatment

And now I have to leave

She even called an Uber for me

She kept my things safe

As well as my clothes
All the things she took from my
car

I appreciate that

Me : I will see you soon ….

Rain : I hope not

I laugh
Me : I most certainly will and
will thank your for saving me ,
like thank you really

Rain : I live this life to serve a

purpose , and so was what I did
. There’s no need to thank me ,
my guides will thank and reward
me enough

This girl is so beautiful , her

beauty just makes me overlook
this creepiness about her
This whole healer thing doesn’t
suit her at all

The beads and all

But I won’t lie , she still looks

beautiful in them

This one can give me beautiful

kids
Me : can I ask though ?

She frowns

Rain : I helped you free of

charge , but I might end up
asking for some light if you’re
going to question me

Me : listen , the guides want

this . They brought me here ,
don’t deny them that
Rain : oh ! So they’re the guides
now that you want things to suit
you ?

I chuckle

Me : anyways , why this great

someone doesn’t just kill me ? If
I’m really such a bother

She smiles and let’s out a laugh

Rain : Ancestors are anything
but killers , unless they’re
protecting you from your
enemies then they’re capable of
killing just to revenge you . Your
situation is very different ,
you’re your own enemy . And
they will never kill you , but if
you keep on being difficult you
will suffer the rest of your days .
Until God , the one who has the
power to give and take life
takes yours . That’s not up to
them to kill you

Me : mhm , they just sound like

bitter and mean people

Rain : please just go

I sigh

Me : fine , I’ll see you soon

I grab my bag heading to the
Uber

Rain : I hope not

Me : woman ! You don’t know

what you’re talking about

She gasps , I wink as I get inside

the Uber

Now I have to go face my reality

I don’t know how my mother is
going to welcome me

There’s no going back now

I’m dropped off at home

And I’m glad they’re home ,

cause I would stand out here
forever
The gate opens and I ring the
gate monitor

I know whoever opened saw me

I walk in , dragging along the

drive way

I knock at the door

And Zweli opens

Zweli : Thonga

I swallow hard

Me : hi

Zweli : come in

Me : is my mom home ?

Zweli : no , she’s coming now

though
Me : eh …..maybe I should wait
out here for her , in case she
kicks me out when she gets
here

Zweli : don’t speak nonsense ,

come inside

He makes way , grabbing my

other bag
I grab the other and walk inside

Zweli : go put your bags in your

room , come join me for lunch

Right now I am feeling

somewhat

And I’m scared of this welcome

Because I don’t know if my

mother will have the same
Zweli has never had a problem
with me

That much I know

And it’s not like I have anything

against him

I grab the bags and walk

upstairs to the room I used to
call mine
And everything is just the way I
left it

I take a minute and gather

myself

Before walking down to the

dinning room

I sit down
And in that awkward silence ,
my mother walks in

I can’t even hold her stare

She greets , and I greet back

with my head bowed down . I
can’t even look at her

She walks over to Zweli , and

side hugs him
Placing a peck on the side of his
head

Zweli : we’re about to have

lunch , join us

She takes her coat off , he

opens the chair for her

They dish up , and I can’t even

bring myself to
Mom : what’s going on ?

That’s addressed to me I know

Zweli : he came back home

Mom : oh ! Is that so ?

Zweli : babe , this is still his

home isn’t it ?

Maybe it still is
Mom : well is he back at varsity
?

This might go on forever , I

might as well just be honest

Get it over and done with

Clearly this woman is not

budging , unless I’m back to be
a child and go back to varsity
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 15*
*Thongalethu*
Me : the last 6 weeks have been
tough , more than I thought
they would be . Over a few days
ago , I had secured a gig I was
sure I got and had in the bag .
But things didn’t pan out how I
had hoped , so I was down .
Very down , because a lot was
crumbling . I really didn’t have a
place to stay , and hotels are
expensive . So I over spent , and
just misused whatever money I
had . I really couldn’t pay the
car either , so it was due to be
repossessed . When I lost the
deal , I was devastated . And I
know there was no saving grace
for me , so i overdosed on drugs
…
Mom : what ?

Me : I ….I thought I had it under

control

Mom : drugs Thongalethu ?

Me : I had made it a norm , a

coping mechanism of some kind
. I thought I was in control , I’ve
always taken enough just to get
me through the day . But that
day , I don’t know what
happened . Maybe everything
just got too much

Mom : I really thought this was

an eye opener for you , but you
were out there snorting drugs

She sighs with eyes glistening

Now I feel like shit , because

this is all my doing
Mom : how long have you been
doing drugs ?

Me : it’s been 3 years

She looks down putting her

elbows on the table

Me : well I don’t know , but this

beautiful creepy weird girl said
all this is done by ancestors .
Like my behaviour and all that ,
and I’m not making excuses

Mom : what ?

Me : I swear , I am not making

this up

Mom : what girl ? That one who

came here looking for you ,
saying she’s your girlfriend ?
Me : I don’t have a girlfriend ,
I’m still yet to ask this one out

Zweli laughs

Mom : you’re thinking about

girls , right after telling me
you’re a drug addict

Me : I am not an addict , and

besides I am trying to explain
what she said
She sighs

Mom : fine

Me : yeah so , she said

something about grandmother
Opelong having a gift

She pops her eyes

Mom : she did ?

Me : of course , but I told her
there’s no such . Oh yeah , and
something about grandfather
Nkosiyabo with tainted blood
from some whatever kingdom
animal something . That one
lost me very bad , and then
there’s this great someone
who’s a grandfather . His
shadow or spirit she said , is
following me . Oh , and
apparently the great someone
is not happy with me at all .
They’re doing all of this , and
she said only dad can help me .
Apparently if I don’t do what
they want , I will suffer until I
die

I look at her , and she has her

jaw dropped

Zweli : you just said very

important things , but why are
you so bad at explaining things
? You’re just rumbling like a two
year old

Me : dude ! At least I explained

them

Mom : I need to call your father

Me : wait , was she telling the

truth ? I mean these people are
liars , and they just scam people
. Next thing we will be paying
this girl a lot of money , because
of lies she said

Mom : do you know her ? Like

do you know where we can find
her ?

Me : yeah

I don’t think I will get lost going

to their home
It was strange though

I didn’t even see one adult

there

And I never asked about her

parents

Also I didn’t take a good look

around the house

But I surely won’t get lost at all

Mom : I need to call your father

She gets up

Me : can I please come back

home ? I am homeless to be
honest , and i will return back to
Varsity for second semester , I
swear . I also just want to be
okay
She says nothing and walks
away

Me : great !

I heave a sigh

Like what’s that reaction ?

Zweli : give her time , she has to

digest what you just said right
now
I nod taking a plate and dishing
up for myself
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Me : he said that ?

Khosi : yes

I sigh
Khosi : I am worried Mageba ,
my son doesn’t know anything
about your great great
grandfather being the royal
healer or your father how that
prince bit him . Yet he came
back home talking about those
people

This I have never heard of

before
Me : seems like I need to come
back home

Khosi : you better , because if

this is really this way . Then my
son needs serious help , you
know your mother had a gift .
But Thongalethu didn’t know
that , but he spoke about it

Me : it’s okay , I will come back

as soon as I can
Khosi : please , and I am sorry to
be of a nuisance

I chuckle

Me : you can never be that to

me , ever . I will come back okay

She sighs

Khosi : let me go finish lunch

Me : okay , thank you for calling

Khosi : alright bye

She drops the call

Now this is insane , it’s too

much

I need to find a way now to

explain to Swazi
That I am leaving again

And that on its own already has

me stressed some more

Because I know she will make a

fuss out of this

But this is very serious , and it

comes first . I know this is not a
lie at all
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Right now I don’t even want to
get my hopes high

Because my father might just

not come

After what he dished me

He might say I am using this as
an excuse to get back home

Because I clearly failed making

it on my own

Me : and it wasn’t the first time

I saw her

They both look at me

The way my mother reacted , I
feel she knows something

Me : the first time it was at

Menlyn mall , she came to me
and as soon as I saw she was
those types with beads and
animal cloths . I gathered my
attitude , and told her to get
away from me with her fake
prophecies . She did say some
things to me , but I didn’t pay
attention to it . The second time
, I was parked beside the road ,
and she opened my car door . I
was annoyed and told her off ,
third time was now finding me
on death row

Mom : you should be ashamed

of yours

For what really ?

Me : I know
What can I say ?

I don’t want drama , so it’s fine .

But I am lost , though I am so
not ashamed

Me : mom can I please come

back home ?

Now I am pleading
Mom : and a child is coming
under my roof

Me : yes

I can’t believe this

Now I have to go back to

campus

As much as I don’t want to , I

have to
Because I don’t need this varsity
talk behind me

Mom : you can come back

home , but this issue of drugs . I
have never been so
disappointed of you really , I
don’t even know what to say
about it .

Yeah well , I do understand her

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 16*
*A FEW DAYS LATER*
*Thongalethu*
I have never seen such tight
security
The last time I was here , I
didn’t see all of these guards

And they’re refusing to let me in

without a pass

I’m just asking myself , if Rain

left and some rich people
moved in here

After a lot of begging , I finally

just stop
And sit down by the gate

I might just sit out here forever

But what the hell

Time goes by , until the gate

opens and I’m on my feet in
seconds

Doesn’t she come out

Wearing the white lion cloth ,
and she’s walking barefoot

Without a doubt , she was

smoking that snuff thing

She even has a tissue in hand

Me : wow ! You live

Rain : what do you want here ?

Me : I came to see you , but like
why so many security guys in
your yard ? Your parents really
must be strict parents

Rain : this is my house , my

parents don’t live here

Me : you see what you just said

, is embarrassing . But it’s fine ,
cause you already know just
how broke I am . Can I take you
out for ice cream ?

Rain : no , leave

Me : you know , I am trying to

fix my life . And right now , I am
just waiting for my father to get
here . You said he’s the only
one who can help me

She sighs
Me : please , just ice cream and
we come back . You don’t even
have to talk to me , if you don’t
want to . I’ll be sad though , but
I’ll still appreciate being with
you

Rain : come in

She turns walking inside , I

follow
Me : your people were talking
about having a pass , you think I
can get one of those ?

She laughs

Rain : in your dreams

Me : but ….this is not on

She shakes her head

Rain : wait for me here , I am
going to change

Me : fine

I sit down on the couch in the

lounge
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : what ?

She laughs

Me : don’t be this person , he’s

in the lounge

Busi : I thought we’re never

going to see him ever again

Me : oh well , I guess we
thought wrong
Busi : I don’t know what to say

Me : I’ll see you in an hour or so

Busi : have fun

I smile

I don’t know what fun I’ll have

with that guy
Going out for ice cream

I don’t even like ice cream

Give me candy , and I’ll grin like

a baby

I grab my bag walking out of my

room along with Busi

Busi : I have assignments to

attend to
Me : okay

Busi : what’s happening with

varsity ?

I sigh

Me : I don’t know ….but I don’t

think that’s for me

She says nothing

I have to think about them too

They moved here because of

me

So if I leave , they have to leave

as well

I have to consider them into

thought
Me : we will talk

She nods

I head down , and find him

seated on the couch

Me : we can go

He gets up

Thonga : you’re beautiful

Me : don’t try to charm me , it
won’t work

He laughs as we walk out

Thonga : my Uber is outside

Me : my driver will take us , that

way I know I am secured

He smiles
Thonga : are you the daughter
of the president ?

I frown

Thonga : I mean , this high

security . The house you live in ,
and you even have a driver ?

I heave a slight sigh and look at

him
Me : I am a princess from Isizwe
sa MaMpofu kingdom in
Eastern Cape

His jaw drops

Me : go pay your Uber , you’ll

find me in the car . Simo will
take you home after whatever
this is done
That gets to him

Thonga : it’s a date , this is a

date . Not whatever

He walks out the gate , I laugh

going to the car
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
A whole princess ?

I am shocked more than

anything

I didn’t even think about that

Not even once

But who would think of a

princess living here in Joburg ?
What I am hoping for , might
not even happen . Because
she’s royalty

But I have to ask first to see if

really I stand no chance

I pay the Uber driver , and he

leaves

I had asked him to wait for me

But now there’s no need for
that

The car drives out , and stops

next to me

I open the back door and get in

Rain : greet

Me : what ?
She stares at me , I chuckle
greeting the driver

He greets back with a chuckle

Me : so where would you like to

go ?

Rain : I am glad you’re asking ,

because I don’t even like ice
cream
Me : it’s okay , my bad . But I
know the perfect place

I give the guy directions

.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Me : I have to go back to South
Africa

She sighs
I have been derailing this

But I can’t anymore

Swazi : why ?

Me : it’s about Thongalethu , I

just found some things . That
really needs the families
attention , probably even taking
him home to KZN
Swazi : you were there just now
, and you have to go back again

Me : I have to , it’s for his own

good

Swazi : I don’t even know what

you’re talking about

I sigh

I can’t do this with her

How do I even begin to explain
this ?

Swazi : all I know is that I’m not

being left alone again

Me : fine , you can come with

Swazi : fine

I laugh
Me : baby , you’re being
dramatic right now

Swazi : I don’t know , I just hate

being without you here

Me : it’s okay , I’m sorry we’ll go

back together

Swazi : okay
Me : I love you

Swazi : I love you too

It doesn’t matter that she’s

coming with , just as long as I
can get to go home

And attend to this matter

I will not be babying her there ,

she’s on her own
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 17*
*Rain*
I didn’t think he will bring me to
a candy shop

I’m laughing
Cause I didn’t even tell him this

Thonga : can I ask you

something ?

I look at him

Thonga : it’s not about what

you told me

Me : okay , you can ask

Thonga : uhm , so as a princess .
I don’t know how these things
work , but like are you
supposed to marry a prince ?

I laugh

Me : where do you get that ?

Thonga : it’s a thing with royals

Me : so you know royals ?

Thonga : I know you

Crazy

Me : you barely know me

Thonga : I will fix that , but tell

me . Is that a thing ?

Me : my mother is not royalty

He smiles

Thonga : that’s nice , and you’re

not betrothed to some prince ?

Me : no

He nods

Me : what’s with the crazy

questions ?
Thonga : I just wanna see if I
don’t stand a chance

Me : don’t even bother or try

He laughs

Thonga : I don’t know about

that , I feel like I am already
gone too far
Me : free advice , you need to
focus on fixing things you need
to fix . And just leave girls alone

He laughs

Thonga : what girls ? I am

talking about one , and that’s
just you

I shake my head slowly

Me : I don’t even know what
you’re thinking

Thonga : I should just tell you ,

that I want you .

Me : want ?

Thonga : I already told you that I

need you

I smile
Thonga : I am not rushing you ,
I’m a mess . And you don’t need
to be brought into that , also I
might not even be your type .
It’s not every girl who wants a
drug addict

Me : don’t judge yourself like

that , you’re not an addict . I
told you what caused you to be
like that
Thonga : doesn’t matter , and
that’s not how the world sees
things

Me : I am me , I don’t see things

how the world does

Thonga : so is it safe to say , I

can still spend time with you ?
Until you’re ready to let me in ?

I sigh
Thonga : like I said , I am not
rushing you

Me : I will have to consult my

guides about this

Thonga : wow , I am sure they

don’t like me already

I laugh
Me : they let your great great
great grandfather , be in my
presence for days .

Thonga : I hope the universe

will work my way

He doesn’t even believe what

he’s saying about the universe
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I cannot believe this

He has been ignoring me

Like completely gone AWOL

And after so long not seeing

him , when I see him he’s with a
girl
Like what the fuck !

I wanted to ignore that

But I just can’t

I approach them , as they head

to the parking lot

She laughs as he says something

to her
Placing his arm on her back

Me : Thongalethu Zulu !

They both turn and look at me

I walk closer

Already he has an annoyed look

on his face

Too bad for him , I am pissed

Me : ghosting me for over a
month , and this is what you’re
busy doing ? Replacing me with
the next cute thing ….

Thonga : don’t call her a thing

Winnie : well , did you know he

has a girlfriend of 5 years ?

I ask her
She says nothing but opens the
car door and get in

Me : I am talking to you

I try to move closer to the

window

But Thongalethu pushes me

back
Thonga : stop !

Me : no ! Babe why are you

doing this to me ? What did I do
?

He sighs

Me : like why are you doing this

to me ? I love you Thonga , why
are you doing this ?
I wipe my tears , but they keep
falling

Thonga : I loved you in high

school , then I liked you . But
now , there’s absolutely nothing

Me : no ….no you cannot tell

me that shit , not after
everything we have been
through
Thonga : come on , it wasn’t
that deep

Me : not that deep ? Heh , 5

years not that deep ?

Thonga : it was just years , love

ends and feelings fades . Just
stop ! I have to go now , I’m
going through shit in life . We’re
all going through something ,
you’ll get over this breakup too
Me : Thonga ….

He opens the door and gets in

the car

It drives off , leaving me a crying

mess in Menlyn mall parking lot

Like he just broke up with me ?

Just like that

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
That is not how I anticipated
things to go like

Was so not looking to see

Winnie at all

We’re parked by my mother’s

house at the gate
Me : thank you for the day

She nods

We haven’t said anything to

each other

Except me apologizing for what

happened

And she said nothing

Of course she’s not happy
about all of that

She doesn’t need to tell me to

see it

I mean , things were coming

along just fine

Until that happened

Me : once again , I am sorry
about what happened

She sighs

Rain : it’s clear you really have

issues to fix

Me : I know , but that’s done

I feel like this has taken me a

step back with her
Me : I ….I can assure you that

I hold her hand

She tries to pull it back , but I

don’t let go

Rain : Thonga , I am a princess .

I cannot be caught up in a
scandal of boyfriends
Me : I will never put you
through that

Rain : can you guarantee that ?

She sighs

Rain : what if your girlfriend

goes on to shame me on
Facebook ? I can’t have that

Me : I won’t let that happen

Rain : you don’t control her

Winnie is a lot of things , but I

don’t think she will go to that
extent

Crazy as she is

Me : please don’t shut me out ,

I promise I won’t let that
happen
She turns her face away from
me

Me : please , I will get in line

She laughs

Me : that’s a promise

She turns and looks at me

Rain : I wish you had this urge ,
to do this for you . Not to
impress me

I chuckle

Me : it doesn’t matter , at the

end of the day it’s winning
double

Rain : you need help , like

serious help . Something is
wrong with you , like you’re not
okay at all

I slightly laugh

Me : with certain things yes ,

but not everything . And it’s fine
, I can be crazy for you . I don’t
mind

We lock eyes
I lean over , my face just inches
away from hers

Me : allow me

She exhales

I brush my lips over hers , the

front door opens

The drive walks out , I chuckle

and she giggles
I place my hand on the back of
her head , bringing her closer

As I capture her lips into mine

We kiss slowly , and so

passionately

She places her hands on my

arms
After a few minutes I pull out
slowly

She opens her eyes slowly

Me : don’t give up on me yet ,

let me fuck up on my own . Now
let me fix things

She says nothing but slowly

nods
Me : call out your number for
me

She smiles

Rain : you have a phone now ?

I chuckle

Me : I will call you with your

mother in-law’s phone
She laughs calling out there
number

This is the time when having a

photographic memory actually
works and has its benefits

Me : you have it on your phone

?

She nods
Me : let me see it

She shows me the number , and

I have captured it

Me : I’ll call you

I lean over for a kiss , which she

gladly welcomes
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 18*
*Rain*
I sigh getting up

I don’t know what I am doing

with Thongalethu

It’s not giving me peace

I am not at ease at all

Maybe it’s what happened with
that girl yesterday

I don’t know

Or maybe it’s my own fears

I haven’t had a boyfriend , since

I was 18

And it was some prince , who

was just a douchebag
And I ditched him before we
even went any far

Now I don’t know

I called my uncle this morning

He didn’t say much

It felt like maybe he’s hiding

something from me
Or maybe I could just be
reading too much into that

But then again , I barely know

this guy

Even though he didn’t say any

warnings

But one thing is that , wether I

give in or not
Thongalethu has his journey to
go through

And I don’t even think he’s

ready for all of that

He called me last night

And we spoke for a whole two

hours , and I didn’t even think
he would call
I wonder how he got his mother
to part with her phone for that
long

It’s a dull morning for me

I walk out , heading to the

kitchen

Taking out my food from the

food warmer
I left during breakfast to go into
my Ancestral room

I feel like I wasted time doing

that

Cause I got nothing

Sometimes I do not understand

ancestors
They can literally let you fall in a
pit

All in the name of a lesson

It’s just crazy

I guess I will just see how this

goes

It’s only been a day

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Mom : are you going to eat ?

I look at her

I don’t even have that appetite

As much as I took the time , and

spoke with Rain last night
I don’t know if seeing Winnie
didn’t ruin things for us

Me : uhm ….. can you please

borrow me your phone ?

Mom : what did you do with

your phone ?

Me : I sold it honestly

Mom : for drugs

I just nod

Mom : I think you need rehab

Hah ! That’s a stretch , I mean a

whole rehab

Me : no I …..I don’t

Mom : your overdosed on drugs

Thongalethu
Me : okay , if I agree to rehab
will you borrow me your phone
?

She laughs

Mom : what ?

I say nothing

I just want her phone

Mom : you will really go to
rehab just because you want to
use my phone ?

Me : I just need to make a call

Mom : you finished my airtime

last night

Me : I’m sorry , I’ll buy you

airtime
Mom : I have to buy airtime
now , so you can make that call

Me : just R5 , I won’t be long

She sighs

I plead , she hands me her

phone

Me : thank you
Mom : whoever this girl is , she
better be worth it

I chuckle

Mom : and tell her not to call

me , use the app to buy airtime
. Don’t finish it again

I laugh getting up
I go on her bank app , buying
airtime

I dial her number , and she

doesn’t pick up

Me : damn !

I call again , and on the first ring

she answers

I heave a sigh of relief

Me : I thought you’re ghosting
me now

She giggles

Rain : I was battling

I sigh

Me : I am glad you answered

We have a moment of silence

Me : I called to say good

morning , my mother wants to
send me to rehab ….

Rain : what ?

Me : uhm ….she’s still on the

overdose

She sighs
Rain : but how long will you be
gone ?

Me : I don’t know , she just

brought it up . I don’t know if
she’ll go through with it or not

Rain : I hope she doesn’t

I laugh
Me : someone will miss me ?

Rain : you can’t say and do what

you did with me yesterday , and
then run off to rehab for
months

Me : I will beg for them to allow

me to have visitors , just to have
you alone visit me

Rain : I don’t like this

This is cute

Me : how about you come see

me today ? Or do you have to
go to campus ?

Rain : I don’t want to go there

anymore

I feel like I have to just push her

not to give you on that
I mean , I will be going back
next semester

So I want her here

Me : please come , then we can

talk about all this

Rain : at your parents house ?

Me : they won’t even be here

She laughs

Rain : I don’t trust you

Of course I am not sure of what

I just said

Me : just once

Rain : fine , I’ll come around

11:00 . Is that okay ?
Me : yeah

Rain : okay then

Me : I’ll see you soon

Rain : bye

She drops the call

I have a good mind to call her
back , I mean I’m the one who
called her

But she drops the call on me

I don’t want to finish the airtime

again , because I might not get
the phone again

So I need to tread carefully

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Lona : you have been cooped
up in here since yesterday , and
you’re just crying yourself to
depression

I really don’t want to talk

I didn’t even tell her what’s

going on
I know she will just be mean

And tell me she told me so and

what not

And that’s not what I want to

hear right now

I don’t want to hear those

words
I couldn’t stop just asking
myself what I did wrong

How did he move on from me ,

without even breaking things
off

And he’s so brave to even walk

in public with her

Like it’s clear , they went to a

date
I can’t believe this

Like it’s so hard , to even

comprehend that he just broke
up with me just like that

No explanation , and no nothing

Like how do feelings just fade

on someone you love ?
One thing I noticed were the
beads on the girls hands

And the cloth she had wrapped

on her head

It’s just hard to believe I’ve

been dumped

And for a fucking Sangoma

What a joke !
Like what the fuck did she feed
him ?

Lona : I bet this has something

to do with Thonga …..

Me : can you please just stop !

I snap

She’s damn annoying

Me : not everything is about
Thonga

I pull up the sheet covering my

head

I just want her to leave me

alone

This is exactly what I didn’t tell

her anything
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 19*
*Rain*
He opens the door

Looking so good , in maroon

shorts and a maroon t-shirt

I look at him , and find him

staring at me with a smile
I chuckle

Me : hi

Thonga : come in babe

He makes way , I walk in

Thonga : you’re beautiful

Me : is this a norm ?

Thonga : I just spit out truths

I laugh slightly

Thonga : should I get you

something ?

Me : you’re really alone ?

Thonga : yes
Me : okay , I will be comfortable
if we’re where your parents
wouldn’t walk in on us

He smiles

Thonga : wow okay …like that’s ,

mhm

I frown in confusion
And he laughs

Only I catch on what he’s saying

Me : wait …. I’m pure as they

come

He closes the door , taking my

hand into his

And he stands in front of me ,

placing his hand on my waist
We lock eyes , he bites his lower
lip

Just looking into my eyes with

eyes full of lust

Thonga is disgusting

Thonga : I’ve never kissed a

virgin , but you don’t kiss like a
virgin
Me : how does a virgin kiss like
?

Thonga : being all shy and

scared , like “I don’t know how
to kiss” or “I’ve never kissed
anyone”

I laugh

Me : then you have your answer

Yeah the prince and I kissed

That’s where the relationship

ended

With kisses , never went beyond

that

Thonga : mhm , I already don’t

like him
I smile

Me : he was a prince

He frowns

Thonga : even worse

Shame

He’s just one dramatic guy

Thonga : okay , let’s go to my
room . You’ll be comfortable
right ?

Me : yeah but don’t get any

funny ideas

He shakes his head with a smirk

Me : my father will make you

pay a cow , and I’ll be 21 in a
month . Don’t get me to loose
my key

Thonga : fuck ….I’m going to

respect that , I promise

Funny , doesn’t he make a pinky

promise

I laugh as we walk upstairs

heading to his room
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Rain : your mother said what
about rehab ?

I sigh

Me : you don’t like this topic

Rain : I don’t
I love just how she doesn’t hide
things

And she blatantly just says them

, just as they are

Me : well we didn’t visit that

talk after breakfast , maybe
she’s waiting for my father to
get here . I know he will
definitely book me in
Rain : why not be an out patient
?

Me : even if they book me in ,

I’ll still allow you in

Rain : we don’t know they will

allow that

She takes a deep breath

She’s really not for this rehab

But if my parents want me to do
it , then I will

Just for them , so they can get

off my back

I haven’t had an edge to snort

anything

So I don’t think there’s a need

for it , but it’s whatever
I grab her arm and pull her over
me

She smiles

Me : it’s only been a day

MaMpofu , and I feel like you
have fallen so hard . There’s no
saving you

She laughs
Rain : you have no idea what
you’re talking about

Me : I know , but it’s okay cause

your little heart is safe with me .
I won’t hide how I’ve fallen

Her eyes fall

I tilt her chin , and she lifts up

We lock eyes

I’ve never met anyone with

eyes like hers

It’s like they tell a story of some

kind

Me : on day at a time ?

She nods
I bring her face down and we
kiss
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Swazi : I do not understand why
we had to come here first , we
could have just gone to rest at
the hotel

Me : baby please stop ,

Nomakhosi said Thongalethu is
back home . I just want to see
him , and see how bad he is
that’s all . You could have gone
to the hotel on your own , there
was no need to be my tail

She gasps

Swazi : and let you come here

on your own ?

Me : well
I shrug

She scoffs

Swazi : never , I came to South

Africa with you and because of
you . So I’m where you are , you
can call me a tail all you want

Me : then stop
I knock , and Zweli opens the
door

Zweli : Zulu

Me : Ndlovu

He makes way for us , we walk

in

Swazi greets and he greets back

Zweli : we just got back from
work , I’ll go call Khosi . Please
sit down

I nod as we take seats

And he walks up

I hate how Swazi is busy moving

her eyes around , like she’s just
sizing this whole lounge down
Lord knows what she’s looking
for

After a while they walk back

down

Khosi greets and we greet her

back

Khosi : I didn’t think you’ll come

by
Me : I know I didn’t say , but
since you said he’s home . I just
thought it’s best I see him

Khosi : I think he’s in his room ,

I’ll go call him

Me : but how bad is he ?

She sighs

I look at Zweli
Me : that bad ?

He chuckles

Zweli : he’s a much better

Thongalethu , in the years I’ve
known him

Now I am confused , cause his

mother seems very worried
But Zweli is saying something
else

Khosi : I don’t …..

She darts her eyes and we all

look at what she’s looking

Thongalethu : bazali (parents)

Yeah !
It can only be my son

Khosi : okay

She sits down taking a heavy

breath

I chuckle shaking my head

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 20*
*Thongalethu*
This is not good for me

Cause I might just get dumped

I mean , at this point and stage I

feel like I have the girl

But now , what she didn’t want

happening has happened

Like , on the first day she comes

here
These parents are killing me

Dad : Thongalethu

Me : Mtwana

He chuckles

Dad : come sit down

Me : can I just walk ….

Dad : no , both of you come sit

down

The look my mother is giving

me , I cannot even comprehend
it

I’m sure she’s ready to murder

me
This is not the girl that came
here claiming to be my
girlfriend

I sigh , taking her hand that she

so badly wants out of my hand

I lead her to the table and pull

out a chair for her

I sit down next to her

Me : this is Rain Mampofu ,
she’s my girlfriend

Just listen to me

I’m probably dumped right now

cause of this

And I’m already doing girlfriend

introductions

But I don’t care

She will be known as the one
girlfriend I bought home and
introduced

Me : she’s the one who helped

me , and told me all of that
about your great great
grandfather and your father as
well as your mother

They’re all looking at me

Dad : I see , I guess it’s very
important that she be a part of
this discussion

She doesn’t look nor seem very

comfortable with that

Dad : of course , if that’s okay

with you my child

He says looking at Rain

Rain : it’s okay Mr Zulu

He chuckles

Dad : the formalities , but thank

you . I heard from MaKhumalo ,
but I would like to understand
this

I look at her , and tighten my

grip on her hand . I just want to
assure her I’m here , and I’ll
hold her hand through this .
Maybe she’ll explain better than
I did

She takes a deep breath

Rain : this started fuzzy for me ,

in a mall . I was just
overwhelmed by spirit , and my
guides just took over . I
approached him , of course he
dismissed me . But from there ,
I saw the spirit of the old man
that’s following him . And he
wasn’t very pleased , and tried
to pass a message . One which
Thongalethu didn’t want to
hear

She looks at me

Rain : I was taken over by spirit

again , passing his car on the
side of the road . But I left , as
soon as I realised that it was
him . And he was very rude to
me , again his great great great
grandfather appeared there still
not pleased with him . From
there on , the spirit of the old
man was always around me .
And I didn’t know what he
wanted from me , until that day
I found him overdosed on drugs
. A few days out of it , and
experiencing withdraw side
effects he woke up . And I spoke
to his ancestors on his behalf ,
because I wanted to hear why
they’ve been following me and
also him . That’s where I found
out that , the great great great
grandfather was a royal seer .
From the same royal family , of
such it’s great ancestor in his
animal form tainted your father
with his blood . It may have
been done to save his life , but
the blood is way different from
us humans . And it seems as so ,
the old man feels abounded .
Your father never tapped into
that blood , to know and
understand what it is .
Unfortunately , Thongalethu
inherited that from him . He has
that royal great animal blood
running through his veins , one
day he will manifest into it . You
need to help him , so that when
it happens he can be able to
control it and be one with it

Wow !
Me : are you saying I am not
human ?

Rain : you are

My father gets and paces

around

Mom : Mageba !

He runs his hand over his face

Dad : Mageba was the royal
seer to a kingdom in Eastern
Cape , Isilo Kingdom if I am not
mistaken . And my father was
once saved by a Jaglion , after
being hurt in the woods . He
had gone to visit Mageba when
all that happened

Me : okay ….okay , I still don’t

understand what does this have
to do with me . Like I hear all of
that , but what does it have to
do with me ?

Rain : your father has to take

you there , you have to learn an
unleash the traits of this spirit
animal . And also , you have to
grace the Isilo river , where the
old man initiated . There’s
things he wants to give you , so
you can continue being a vessel
. Because he is not yet done
with his life purposes , and he
will use you to carry them
through .

Me : no offence to you Bhabha

(baby) , but I cannot wear beads
and all

She smiles

Me : that cannot be me , there

really was no need for them to
ruin my life and things just so I
can pay attention to them .
They’re dead , why can’t they
just stay dead ?

Rain : you’re never listening

Me : I ….

Dad : we will do whatever we

have to do to help him

Oh !
Mom : I want him to go to
rehab , this drugs business

I sigh

Dad : you overdosed , and you

could have died

Me : but it is said all this is the

work of those people
Mom : still , I would rather you
go get help

There’s no winning

Me : fine , can Rain be allowed

to visit then ?

My father chuckles

Me : like honestly , going to

rehab doesn’t sit well with her
Mom : it’s for your own good ,
and I am sure she also wants a
clean boyfriend . One who’s not
on drugs , and won’t be
overdosing

Me : okay , please just allow her

to visit

Dad : two weeks the most , I

won’t book your more than that
I nod , hoping that’s better time
frame
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I grab the phone and pay

Walking out , I get into the car

I can’t stop these tears

I am really sad I don’t want to
lie

Simo drives off

And all this while , I’m just

wondering if he’ll come back
the same

I am scared right now

And I think he was right

All it took was a day , and I have

fallen

Simo arrives and parks by the

gate

I’m contemplating getting off

I was busy helping him pack

But I just had to leave , and I
said I’ll come back

He said he won’t leave until I

am back

I get out of the car , and lean

against it

After a while , the gate opens

and his father walks out
Mr Zulu : Thongalethu is inside ,
I think he’s waiting for you

Me : thank you

It’s so awkward talking to his

parents , I end up just not
knowing what to say

I walk inside , and he comes out

of the door
Thonga : you’re back ?

He asks with a smile , holding

my hand into his

I nod

Thonga : I thought you’re angry

and you won’t come back

We walk over to his father’s

rented car
Thonga : don’t cry , you know
I’ll be back right ? He said just
two weeks

It was so decided , that he’s

going to rehab

I nod slowly

Thonga : don’t cry , you’ll come

see me
Me : I feel like I won’t be seeing
you in a while , after this your
father said he’s taking you to
Isilo , I don’t know when you’ll
be back . In a month I have to
go home , for my coming of age
ceremony

I so wish he was going to be

there , but I guess he won’t .
That’s very clear
Even though I didn’t ask him to
come

I can just tell how the situation

is

He won’t be there

Thonga : can we not worry

about all of that ? I don’t want
to leave you here sad
I am sad , I can’t even hide that

Me : I got you something

I reach in my bag taking out the

phone

He chuckles

Thonga : Bhabha (baby) ….

Me : don’t say anything , if you
can spare 5 minutes please just
use a minute and call me . I
made sure there’s enough
airtime and data there

Thonga : I’ll call you everyday

He engulfs me into a tight hug

I’m trying so hard to fight my

own tears
He pulls out of the hug , and
captures my lips into his

I hate this kiss , cause it feels

like we’re saying goodbye to
each other

Thonga : I love you so much

He pulls back , my jaw dropped

He just wipes my tears off , now
his family comes out

I can’t even ask him about what

he just said

Does he mean it , or emotions

are just getting the better out
of him ? Like I am stunned , I
didn’t expect to hear the words
so soon to say the least
It’s a bittersweet moment , as
his parents and step parents say
goodbye to him

Hopefully when he comes back ,

his parents will be pleased with
what they see

I for one don’t think he needed

this

But I am not a parent

And I don’t know how parents
are , where their kids are
concerned

I know though , that this is

coming from a good place .

They just want what’s best for

him

And for him to get better

Thonga : take of yourself for me
okay ?

I nod

Mrs Ndlovu : don’t be shy for us

They laugh

Mrs Ndlovu : don’t worry he will

be back , you also need a man
that’s on the straight and
narrow. With good principles of
life , and we’re just trying that
for him . He will come back
sooner than you think

Me : I understand

Mr Ndlovu : okay , it’s time to

go now

And the moment is here

Now I wish I wasn’t here to see
him leave , but his parents were
okay with that

His father actually told me to be

here

Yesterday was just intense , and

there’s something I wanted to
ask him
But I didn’t

I think now is the best time to

Especially as they walk a bit

further away from us

Me : why are your parents

divorced legally , but still
married traditionally ?

He looks at me
Thonga : what ?

Me : when they divorced , they

didn’t inform the ancestors
about their separation . Your
mother traditionally , is still a
Zulu wife . She’s not welcomed
in the Ndlovu , because they
see her as a woman who
belongs to another man .
Another family and another
kraal , she’s a Zulu bride
He frowns , but his lips curve
into a smile

Me : yhoh ! Worse , they still

love each other and are
together

He laughs

Thonga : what do you mean

they’re together ?
I clear my throat

Me and my big mouth

Thonga : babe ?

Me : you have to go now

Thonga : you can’t throw such a

bombshell on me
We’re not doing this

I already said things maybe I

shouldn’t have said
.
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 21*
*A MONTH LATER*
*Rain*
Everything is coming along so
fine

But I am not happy

Today is the last day of

preparations

My heart is not here

I’ve been back home for a week

Tomorrow is my coming of age
ceremony

My parents are so happy , they

couldn’t be more proud

All my siblings are home ,

everyone is happy

I am just not feeling this

Thongalethu came out of rehab
a week ago

So he stayed there for three

weeks and not the initial two
weeks

Now he’s been at Isilo for a

week , after going to KZN for
some ceremony

I miss him
Like I miss him so bad

It’s not the same talking over

the phone

But he has kept his promise , he

calls everyday

I feel and hear so much change

in him now that he’s at Isilo
Even his voice has deepened so
much

I wonder just how he looks like

now

On FaceTime or video call , he

always looks like he has gained
some muscles

And has gotten buffer

Maybe I am just seeing things
that are not there

I have no idea when he will be

back in Joburg

But after my ceremony , I am

returning back

I tried my level best to go back

to varsity
And it was because of him

He so badly wanted to go back

this semester

But he wasn’t around , so he

missed out on that

He said next year he will

definitely go back

I am trying to hold my own

Hopefully , I will see it through
the years
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
King Hawu : you don’t look okay

I frown
Me : no

King Hawu : want to talk about

it ?

I heave a sigh

Me : before coming here , I was

at rehab for three weeks

King Hawu : mhm

Me : drugs

King Hawu : oh , I see

Me : I am fine now , and I

honestly don’t think I needed
that . But my parents were hell
bent on it

He chuckles
King Hawu : it’s the work of a
parent

Me : I am here because of this

woman , and now I am scared

King Hawu : let’s take up a walk

, but don’t take me deep into
the woods

I chuckle as we head to the

palace West gate going out
Me : she’s gifted , the same way
as you are . And she’s the
reason I got to know all this
truth , about Mageba . And
about my grandfather , and
what happened to him with Isilo

King Hawu : she’s a true child of

the ancestors

I heave a sigh
King Hawu : why are you
worried ?

Me : she hasn’t seen me face to

face in a month , and a lot has
changed . The week I have been
here , I’m completely a different
person . What if when she sees
me again , she won’t feel the
same anymore ?
King Hawu : but I believe she
knew the kind of transformation
you have to go through

Me : I look scary , the damn

thing on my back looks like it’s
alive ….I just …

I shake my head slowly

Everything just happened so

fast
All it took was me going into
that river

And this Jaglion couldn’t handle

that water

Within seconds of being inside

the Isilo river

I changed form , just to fight to

get out of the water
Now I am stuck with a Jaglion
mark on my whole back

It’s whole face is just there

The thing looks scary

Me : I am way too different now

, not the guy she fell for . And
she might not be for this me
All this is just bringing me
nothing but just pain

Me : it’s her coming of age

ceremony tomorrow , I would
have loved to be there . But my
fear …

I shake my head

King Hawu : where is she from ?

Me : Isizwe sa MaMpofu

King Hawu : hah ! Now it makes

sense

Me : what ?

King Hawu : why Isilo would

imprint on you , using your
grandfather’s blood

Me : you’re loosing me
King Hawu : you will have to be
a man , understand some
decisions . It won’t be an easy
road , I hope you’ll he prepared
enough for it to conquer .

Like why is he speaking in

riddles ?

Me : can you explain a bit better

?
He chuckles

King Hawu : your hut is getting

built , your Ancestral bag will be
here . You will take upon
Mageba’s gift , and continue his
duties . And well , there’s also
Isilo , you have to accommodate
him in this . He’s the great
ancestor of this kingdom , the
protector . That’s your duty
now
What ?

I look at him

King Hawu : you’re dating a

future queen , do you
understand what this means ?

I think I do

It’s scaring the hell out of me

King Hawu : I’ll have a driver
take you to Isizwe sa MaMpofu ,
we’re neighbouring kingdoms .
My wives will also be there

He pats my shoulder

King Hawu : buy gifts , don’t

show up empty handed . And
make sure the princess knows
your intentions , there’ll be a lot
of competition there tomorrow
. Mark your own , remember
who you are now . A product of
Isilo

He turns back , and I see how

far we have walked

We’re in the woods

And he didn’t even want to get

this far
I heave a sigh

Taking out my phone , I send

her a text message

Hopefully she will get it

.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I look at his message
“I’ll see you soon”

I don’t think I understand this at

all

Does he mean he’s coming here

or what ?

Maybe he’s soon going back to

Joburg
I mean , I have no idea how long
he will stay at Isilo

But if he’s going back to Joburg ,

then it would mean he
completed what he was
supposed to do

That was quick

And hopefully , he can get his

life back in check
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 22*
*Thongalethu*
She looks so beautiful

I don’t even think she has seen

me
I called her this morning

And she wasn’t sounding okay

But I am glad she’s enjoying her

day

Not her father thanking her

with a whole X5

For being good , and keeping

her purity
Now she has been given a key

I’m not in a hurry to tap that

But I can’t say I am not

attracted in all kinds , and very
much attempted to

But I know better now

And I still have things to finish

And I know I have to pay
damages , after I break her
virginity

I guess now I know better

Being at Isilo has taught me so

much

It’s a lot to take in

Having to adapt now to this
whole new me

Knowing I am not alone , but

with such a great ancestor

It’s also scary

I wonder if she knew the whole

truth , when she first started
telling me about this
If she doesn’t

Will she accept me now

knowing I can change into this
beast ?

All kinds of ancestors invade us

Cause of things that have been

done to them

By those in our linage

In my case , it’s because this
beat saved my grandfather

And now it had wormed it’s way

into me

And I have to accept that

Now I have been bestowed this

duty
To protect that kingdom and it’s
people

Until this ancestor can come

upon one of their one

And that’s not a given that it

will

I don’t know how I’m going to

do this
But I guess I will learn as time
goes on

Having to take upon the gift of

Mageba

That’s something I still have to

come into terms with

I haven’t even shared most of

this with my family
I don’t know how they will take
it

The fear of rejection now , is

what’s on my shoulders

What will I do if they don’t

accept this ?

If they don’t accept who and

what I am now ?
I guess that’s a talk for another
day

Or when I go back home

Now I’m just thankful to King

Hawu

For making this day possible for

me to be here

I came along with his wives

He even gave me the money for
the gifts and all

Right now I just want to see my

girlfriend and greet her
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Me : I am tired

Busi : Simo is asking for you

I want to change out of these

clothes

It’s been a long day

I get up and walk to the door

Me : Simo
Simo : Nkosazane (my princess)

Me : what is it ?

Simo : there is someone asking

to see you

Me : who ?

Simo : if you can come with me

, it would be better
Me : Simo , I am tired . Can’t
you just tell me ?

I feel a bit sad that Thonga

wasn’t here

I don’t understand half the

things he’s going through right
now

So I guess he couldn’t come

Simo : it won’t take long

I sigh closing the door following

him

And he goes to his quarter

Me : Simo ….

He opens the door , and tears

just blurry my eyes
But I just gather myself closing
the door

As Simo turns and walks away

Me : you came ?

It’s all done and finished

But he’s here

He walks closer to me

He looks so different , and more

nature

He’s even more buff

He looks nothing like the

Thonga I knew a month ago

Thonga : I wouldn’t miss this for

anything
I smile tears streaming down
my face

Me : but when did you get here

?

Thonga : morning

So he didn’t miss anything

Me : but I didn’t see you

He chuckles , and it’s so deep

Like that of a thousand

masculine voices

Thonga : you were not looking

for me

I smile , wiping my tears off

Me : you look ….so different

Thonga : I know , I hope you can
still accept me with my changes
as your boyfriend

Gosh !

I walk closer to him , placing my

hands on his lower back

He hugs me back , but it feels so

held back
I just tear up

Me : I missed you so much

He tightens the hug

Now this is the hug I wanted

and was expecting

I don’t know why he was so

scared to hug me
Thonga : you have no idea how
much I missed you

I’m so happy that he’s here

Like no words can express how

I’m feeling right now

He slowly pulls back

Thonga : and I still love you

I smile

Me : I’ve always loved you , and

I love you

He grins leaning down and we

kiss

It feels like years since I was in

his embrace like this
Feeling his lips against mine
.
.
.
.
*Mahlubandile*
This day went great

But now Jongikhaya is worrying

me
He called me in his Ancestral
hut

He doesn’t look good

Me : what’s wrong ?

He sighs

Jongikhaya : these royals are

not alone
I hope history is not repeating
itself

I cannot deal with witches right

now

That time is over and behind us

, I don’t long for it

It should stay there

I am preparing the taking of my
daughter

I cannot be fighting battles

She cannot accept the throne in

the midst of battles

Me : what do you mean ?

Jongikhaya : I have never felt

this heavy and so blocked ,
there’s just something that’s
not of our own . That’s very
powerful here

Me : when you say something ,

what are you referring to ?

Jongikhaya : I can’t see nothing ,

and you know I cannot summon
Ngwe in the midst of a
ceremony like this
Me : are we in danger
Jongikhaya ?

Jongikhaya : no , I think the

princess would have been
shown something

Me : now you’re worrying me ,

and I don’t want to worry her

He sighs
Jongikhaya : it’s probably
nothing , but I had to tell you in
case something erupts in our
midst

Me : and this is the royals ?

Jongikhaya : I am certain , no
commoner can carry such
power . And we know our
people , no outsiders were
invited except the royals
Me : whatever this is , it better
not be here for us . I am not in
the mood

Jongikhaya : we will keep watch

, it’s hard to deal with
something even I do not see nor
understand

I don’t need this

Can my daughter’s day just end
in peace

That’s all
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 23*
*Rain*
Me : you’re really different

He smiles , I really can’t

comprehend him
Thonga : I hope these changes
and differences don’t change
things

Me : no

I see no reason why

Thonga : we will talk better

when I get back home

I nod slowly
Thonga : I hope you won’t
change your mind

Me : what scares you ?

Thonga : everything

I hold his hand

Me : one day at a time

Thonga : that’s the way

Me : and when do you think

you’ll be back ?

Thonga : I don’t know , maybe a

month to go

Me : not bad

Thonga : you’re going back

home again ?
Me : yes

Thonga : still managing varsity ?

I laugh

Me : one day at a time

He chuckles
Thonga : I will get in line again
next year

Me : I am happy

He gets up heaving a sigh

Thonga : I hate that I have to

leave

It’s just sad

I wish we had more time

But he could spare a half and an

hour

And now he has to leave

Thonga : you continue being

good

Me : thank you for coming , and

for the gifts
Thonga : I am proud of you

I get up and hug him

Me : it’s hard I know , but don’t

give up yet . There’s still a long
way to go , but I trust and
believe in you

Thonga : that means a lot

We pull out of the hug

Me : take care

Thonga : always babe

I smile , he leans down

I meet him half way as we kiss

I am sad he’s leaving

But I’m also glad and happy that
he came
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I think right now I am picking up
pieces
Well I think I am

It’s finally sinking in , after a

whole month

That Thonga is done with me

I haven’t even seen him nor

have I heard from him

And as for Lona , she is happy

Clearly she never saw Thonga
being any good for me

I pack up my books , heading

out of the library

I bump into this guy

Me : what the hell ?

Him : sorry
He fixes his cap , as he leans
down picking up my backpack . I
am so annoyed

Him : once again I am sorry

Me : just watch where you are

going

It’s this stupid cap of his , that’s

hiding his whole face
That he doesn’t see where he’s
going
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Me : I am heading out , I’ll see
you soon

She sighs

I shake my head , grabbing my

car keys
Swazi : why are you always
leaving me here alone ?

Me : I have things to do

Swazi : what things that make

you leave your wife alone ?

Me : staying here doesn’t come

cheap , I need to work and
make money
Swazi : we wouldn’t be stuck
here , if you can just allow us to
go back home

Me : and leave in the midst of

everything that’s happening ?
My son needs me here ,
because he’s all alone in that
kingdom . I need to be here
when he gets back home
Swazi : this is just crazy , we’re
stuck living in a hotel like we’re
homeless

Me : I’ll be back

I head to the door

Swazi : maybe we should have

just taken the offer from Khosi
and Zweli to stay at their house
I chuckle

Me : trust me , you don’t want

that shit . You wouldn’t be able
to handle it

She frowns , I walk out leaving

her as she is

Imagine staying in the same

house as Khosi
I will be fucking her right under
her husband’s nose

With Swazi there

.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : where does your wife say
you are at this time ? Or should
I say so called wife ?

He chuckles

Slowly pulling out of me

And the coldness I feel

I bring my legs to his back ,

locking him in
He comes back down , as his
crotch sinks in deeper inside of
me

He chuckles

Bayede : you just can’t help it

can you ?

Me : am I a bad person ?
I cup his face , as he slowly take
deep strokes

Bayede : no , me and you we’ve

always known this . It’s just sad
and unfair to them

Why can’t we just stop this ?

I can’t say I don’t love Zweli

I do love him
And he’s a good man , he takes
care of me

He’s tolerated my rebel son

Yet I can’t just let go of Bayede

Bayede : I just love you so much

, there’ll never be another for
me
Lord !

Me : shut up , and just fuck me

I move my waist underneath

him

Meeting his thrusts , and he

deep grunts

We lock eyes
As I feel that wave of pleasure
creeping in

He picks up his pace

I sunk my nails on his back

He leans his face down

Smashing his lips on mine , the

kiss is just filled with lust
I release my legs on his back , as
I orgasms

And he deep groans inside my

mouth , as his cum fills me up

He pulls back slowly out of the

kiss

I’m panting crazy

Bayede : let’s leave them

I look at him shocked
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 24*
*Nomakhosi*
Me : what ?
Bayede : you heard me , let’s
leave them . I am not saying
let’s get married again , but let’s
be together again . And just
stop with this hide and seek
game , doesn’t it tire you ?
Cause it tires me

I push him off me

Me : I am married
Bayede : come on , it’s not
forbidden to get a divorce

Me : so I must be a divorcee
twice ?

Bayede : you’re blowing this out

of proportion

Me : am I ? Like really ?
I get off the bed

Bayede : MaKhumalo I am
talking to you

His voice is stern

I look at him

Bayede : I have no problem

whatsoever leaving
Me : you’re not legally married
like I am

Bayede : divorce !

Wow !

When did we get here ?

Me : I am not doing this with

you , I am going to shower and
go home
Bayede : I am not going
anywhere , I hope you know
that

He gets up on the bed , and

stands in front of me

He holds my hand

Bayede : tell Zweli , unless you

want me to go tell him to leave
my woman alone . You know I
am capable

I yank my hand off of him

Me : if you even care slightly

about me , you won’t hurt me
like this . It’s not even about
being a divorcee twice , it’s not
about being legally married . I
love Zweli , and I can’t just leave
him to be your girlfriend . I hate
that I can’t unlove you
His face softens

There’s just something about

the love he holds for me

That will always get him calm

And maybe that’s why I just

can’t let go

It’s just insane

Bayede : it doesn’t matter how
long it takes , but you know
eventually you will leave . Let’s
go shower , I’ll take you home

I look at him

Knowing something , when

Bayede speaks . He doesn’t just
say , for the sake of saying
But not this time , I am not
leaving Zweli

And that needs to sink in to him

Me : you can break things off

with your wife if you want , and
you can always just leave me . I
won’t run after you , you know
that . But I am not leaving Zweli
, I am not
Bayede : I will come tomorrow ,
so we can talk about our son . I
think we should go visit him

At least we’re off the leaving

our partners topic

This man has a baby on the way

And he’s talking about

separation , I don’t know
He’s not coming to me with
baby mama drama

I cannot deal with that

Me : will they allow us ?

Bayede : he’s not a prisoner

there , he went to get help

Maybe that’s what we need

.
.
.
.
*Rain*
It’s the morning after my
ceremony

And I’m glad everything went

well

I am so tired , I can literally just

sleep the whole day
I’m coming out of my ancestral
hut , as my father approaches
me

Me : my king

He smiles

Dad : how are you this morning

?
Me : very well , I cannot
complain

Dad : that is good , seeing you

walk out of there . I hope the
gods and ancestors are still
happy with us

Sometimes this man makes the

most awkward conversations
ever
To even think he has the same
print of this Ngwe I walk with

Me : that was just my sthunywa

(pure guides) morning session

It’s crazy how everything has a

time with me

I don’t just do things because I

feel like doing them
Especially when it comes to
communication of the guides ,
and their sacred time

At 00:00 midnight , it’s prayer

time

I’m usually with just a white

candle and a glass of water

Nothing that intense

Then comes 03:00 in the
morning

I’m in my cloths , I have my

candles and snuff along with
incense

That’s the time now , for my

ancestors

I phahla (communication with

ancestors)
Then lastly at 06:45 , that’s the
sthunywa (pure guides) time

I have on my white cape along

with a white doek

A Bible , white candle and a

glass of water

It’s a lot , especially when you

consider those times
And not just mixing things

I do not have the Zionist in me

Hence I don’t even use all

different colours of candles

I don’t mix my communications

I cannot pray and Phahla at the

same time
Like a person who has a Zionist
spirit would do

He smiles

Dad : I am glad

He brings me out of my
thoughts

Me : nothing is bothering you ?

Dad : nothing I should worry
you about

I won’t push further

If he wants to talk , I know he

will

Me : if you need me , you know

where I am my king
He smiles

I bow my head slightly walking

away from him
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
King Hawu : how was your trip ?

He just found me by the Isilo

sacred river
I’m sitting just a bit far

By the river banks

I can’t go closer , Isilo hates the

water

I don’t understand how he and

Mageba are supposed to co
exist in me
When they don’t agree like this

It’s like having isthunywa (pure

guides) and Idlozi (ancestors)

The good that sees the other

part bad

In this case , Mageba being of

water and Isilo hating the water

It’s just crazy

Me : it was worth it my king ,
the princess was very pleased

He chuckles

King Hawu : I am glad

Me : all thanks to you

He sits down next to me

King Hawu : see , a man cannot
focus on his journey if he’s
bothered . I don’t want that for
you

I heave a sigh

Me : I don’t know , I know I am

new at understanding
everything that’s happening .
But I don’t see how I’m going to
make these two spirits , co exist
in me . Because it’s clear , that I
need them both

He smiles

King Hawu : they will co exist

just fine , because as much as
you need them . They also need
you , so without you there’s no
them . See , this is just like
having two ancestors within you
, while one is for church and the
other is for ancestral things .
Obviously the two will clash ,
because the pure guides
considers anything that has to
do with ancestors dirty . But
then , the majority has both the
ancestor and the pure guide .
You can’t ignore the other , and
attend only one . Mageba on his
own he cannot do it , nor can
Isilo . They need to be one , so
there can be a balance and
stability
That was a mouthful

King Hawu : the trick , is just to

always do what is asked and
needed . Like attend every
spirits need

Me : meaning I do whatever
each one tells me

He nods
Me : Isilo hates water , and
Mageba emerged from water

King Hawu : force yourself

through that , show them you
need them both . And you want
to cater for them , one will give
leeway . And that’s how , you’ll
get them to balance and work
together

What he’s saying sounds easy

I just don’t know if it’ll be just as
easy to do
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 25*
*Nomakhosi*
Me : hello

He keeps quite
Me : Bayede !

Bayede : mhm

I heave a sigh

Me : can we not do this ?

Bayede : do what ?

Me : now you don’t want to talk

to me ?
Bayede : you called , and I
answered

Me : I thought you said you

want us to talk about our son

He chuckles

Bayede : I said I will come

Me : no
Bayede : why ? You’re afraid of
what we’ll end up doing ?

I am not going back and forth

Me : when do you think we

should go see him ?

Bayede : call Rain , maybe she

can spare a few days and come
with . My boy must be dying
Me : like really ?

He laughs

Bayede : yeah , so tell me what

Rain says

Me : okay , I’ll call her today

Bayede : alright
Me : bye

Bayede : I love you

My jaw drops , and the phone

slowly slides out of my hand

I’m quick to catch it before it

hits the table

Me : shit !
I drop the call

Leaning back on the couch , I

take a deep breath

My body is sore

I close my eyes , and I could use

some more sleep

Voice : no baby …
I open my eyes looking at him

I smile , rubbing my eyes . And

he chuckles

Me : baby

Zweli : no , why did you sleep

on the couch ?

He was asleep when I got back

And I didn’t want to wake him
up

Also I was smelling of a fresh

shower , I didn’t want to be
caught

Me : I got home late , shame

was on me . I didn’t want to
wake you up from your peaceful
sleep
Zweli : don’t ever do this again ,
you’re a married woman . You
sleep on your bed , with your
husband . Even if you get home
after midnight

Me : I am sorry baby

Zweli : it’s okay , go take a

shower . Come have something
light to eat , and you can get
better sleep
Me : thank you

He helps me up the couch

Zweli : I love you

I smile leaning over giving him a

kiss

Me : I love you
I mumble through the kiss
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Busi : home sweet home

I laugh

My phone rings , I reach for it

Seeing it’s Mrs Ndlovu calling

Honestly I don’t know what to

call this woman

Because with ancestors , she’s

seen and still a Zulu bride

I shake my head slowly

answering

Me : Mrs ….. MaKhumalo

Like

Isn’t that just better ?

MaKhumalo : Rain , how are

you ?

Me : I am good ma , and how

are you ?

I’m not surprised to get her call

MaKhumalo : there’s something
I need to ask you

Me : okay

I hope nothing is wrong

MaKhumalo : Mageba and I ,

were looking on going to Isilo to
see Thonga . I don’t know if you
would like to come with
I would never miss a chance to
see him

Me : when ?

She laughs , I’m just eager

MaKhumalo : a day that’s

suitable for you , because we
might stay a few days
Me : okay , I think I am cool this
week . I have only online classes
to attend to

MaKhumalo : alright , I think we

can leave tomorrow . Just to
have more days

Me : tomorrow is fine

MaKhumalo : okay then

Me : thank you for considering
me

MaKhumalo : his father figured

you two miss each other , we’ll
see you tomorrow

Bless that sneaky man

Me : okay bye

She drops the call

Now I will have to pack for Isilo
Kingdom

Just to pack accordingly

And to ask from my guides the

permission to go entre another
Kingdom
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Me : you again ?

He smiles , still wearing his cap

Him : I come in peace

I just decided to get some fresh

air

Have a glass of milkshake at

Wimpy
And this guy just pops up , right
in front of my table

As he greeted , I saw it was the

guy I bumped into

Him : can I please sit down

Me : I don’t even know you

He smiles again
Him : my name is Venus

I laugh unintended

Me : that’s a white people’s

names , a very strange name

He chuckles

Venus : you don’t wanna know

why I am named Venus
He pulls the chair and sits down

Calling over a waiter , and he

orders two more milkshakes

Venus : I am sorry , for bumping

into you the other day . But
then again , I am not . Cause
now I get to sit down with you ,
I probably won’t leave without
your number too . And who
knows , maybe the next time I
see you I’ll be taking you on a
real date

Me : whoa !

He chuckles

Venus : it feels kind of safe , to

just say I can see you taking my
surname
Me : like dude seriously with
your planet name , it’s too soon
like way too soon

He laughs , I just end up

laughing too

Venus : we’ll see it about it , but

it’s going to happen

Wow !
Please let him not be another
creep

I think I’ve had enough of those

to last me a life time

All thanks to Thongalethu

.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
Me : I am going to Isilo for a few
days with Khosi and Rain ….

Swazi : again you’re leaving me

?

Me : stop , just calm down and

sit down . There’s something I
need to tell you

She puts her hands on her waist

and just stares at me
Me : okay fine , I’ll tell you
either way

Swazi : wait ….is it bad ?

Me : depends how you look at it

She sighs sitting down

She looks at me
Swazi : what is it ?

It’s now or never , but I can’t

keep doing this
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 26*
*A FEW DAYS LATER*
*Rain*
I am having regrets coming here

Could just be me and my

imagination

But Thongalethu is distant

And I don’t want to feel like , I

am not wanted here

He’s just not himself at all

I’ve been quite , but today I just
want to address this and move
on

I don’t mind going back to

Joburg , and just forgetting all
this

Me : can we talk ?

He nods
I am in the chamber he is using

Me : in over a month now , and

we haven’t been together . Last
I saw you , it was just an hour .
And now , I’ve been here a few
days . But it’s like I’m not
wanted here , you’re very
awkward towards me . Please
don’t hurt me , if you don’t
want me here tell me so I can
leave
He sighs and walks closer taking
my hand

Thonga : I don’t want you going

anywhere , I am sorry for my
actions and being distant . I’m
just scared , but I would rather
tell you . Than to have you feel
this way

I heave a sigh of relief

Thonga : please , let me take a
shower and then we can talk

I just look at him

Thonga : today , I was just

absent minded . King Hawu said
he feels like drought season has
come upon the kingdom , he is
very worried

Now that’s worrying

Thonga : maybe I could help , I
am supposed to know how to
help . But I’m still learning

I do feel his worry

Me : I can help , do you think

the king can let me in their river
?

Thonga : help how ?

Me : don’t worry about that , so
will he ?

He chuckles

Thonga : I’ll talk to him , let me

go shower . I am coming

He places a peck on my lips ,

and goes to the bathroom
After a while I walk to his closet
, I just want a t-shirt

I want to sleep and I don’t want

to get my dress wrinkled

I stop on my tracks , as my eyes

land on his whole back

And as if he can sense or feel

me , he turns back and looks at
me
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
The fear in her eyes

Or is it shock all over her face

It just sends shivers down my

spine
Words are just stuck at the back
of my throat

She slowly moves back

And it pains me

Me : I ….I won’t hurt you

I walk closer to her , and she

keeps moving back
Until she’s out of the closet

Me : please stop

Rain : he …..Isilo is within you ?

I sigh

Me : I was going to tell you , I

just didn’t know how . I didn’t
know how you were going to
take this
I walk closer to her

I’m relieved when she doesn’t

move back

I guess she didn’t know this

I take both her hands into mine

Me : what does this mean now

for us ?
I fear that my fears have come
to pass

She seems to know exactly what

this means

Having this great ancestor

within me

For a few minutes she’s quite

Me : baby ….

She pulls her hands away from

me

I heave a sigh

She turns and walks behind me

in silence

I take a deep breath

After a few minutes , I feel her
hands on my back

She trails her hand all over my

back

Rain : beautiful

What the hell ?

I turn and look at her

Me : you’re not scared ?

She smiles

Rain : scared ? No , but shocked

yeah

I chuckle

Rain : my father has the mark

on Ngwe , our great ancestor . I
just didn’t think Isilo invaded
your body , and has become
one with you

This is relief of some kind

Rain : have you changed ?

I nod slowly

Rain : wow , how are you

adapting to this ?
Me : one day at a time

She giggles

Me : baby , I was so scared . I

thought this will scare you away
, and you wouldn’t want
anything to do with me ever
again

Rain : Stop being silly , grab me

your t-shirt
I chuckle

Me : I love you baby

She places her hands on my

chest

Rain : I love you too

Gosh ! Now I am relieved

She leans over cupping my face
, I lean down our lips gracing
each other
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Me : thank you

He smiles
Venus : are you ever going to
give me a chance ?

This one has been asking me

out

I don’t know if I’m ready to step

into another relationship

Especially with a man I do not

know like him
He’s just suspicious and always
wearing a cap

Like he’s hiding from something

It’s just crazy

Me : are you a criminal ?

He laughs

Venus : what …why ?

Me : why are you always hiding
your face in public ?

Venus : recognition purposes

Me : right , running away from

the police thinking someone
might recognise you and report
you ?

He laughs
Venus : you watch a lot of
movies

Me : then ?

Venus : I am the premier’s son ,

I just hate the public attention

Me : which premier ?

Venus : Sishi
I pop my eyes

But now that he says it , there’s

slight resemblance there

And Venus is old , not that

much old

But I can tell he’s a few years

older than me
Me : wow

I am stunned

Venus : I have a daughter , she’s

5 now

Me : baby mama drama

I’ve had enough drama in my

life
I don’t need that no more

I just want and need peace

Venus : her mother and I are

separated , she got married .
My daughter lives with my
parents , there’s no baby mama
drama there

Me : how do I know you’re

telling the truth ? Men lie
Venus : we men die for the sins
of those who have come before
us , it’s a very shady world .
We’re taking punches

I laugh

Venus : please think about this

I heave a sigh
Me : I’m just a nobody , what’s
premier’s son doing with me ?

Venus : we date people , and

not standards

Mhm

Can I ever ?
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 27*
*Thongalethu*
I turn over looking at her

She looks so beautiful

No scratch that
She is beautiful , even when
she’s sleeping

Rain : you’re starring

I chuckle

Me : I thought you’re still

sleeping

Rain : your eyes are boring into

me
I laugh

Me : thank you for spending the

night in here

She slowly opens her eyes , with

a smile

Me : I had the best peaceful

night , I have ever had in years
She smiles leaning over and we
kiss

The downside to spending the

night with her

Is that Mtwana is wide awake ,

and on full speed

And this kiss is not helping at all

That’s why I pull back

Rain : what ?

I take her hand to my dick

She gasps

Rain : whoa !

Me : the benefits of sleeping

next to you , this is torture
She laughs

Rain : I am sorry

Me : let me go take a cold

shower

Rain : won’t you ever get tired ,

and end up cheating on me ?

Me : hey , look at me
She lifts her eyes and looks at
me

Me : I won’t lie , I am dying to

be buried deep inside of you .
But I won’t rush you , we’ll do
this when you’re ready . I would
rather walk around with a
throbbing painful dick , than to
cheat on you . That will never
happen

Rain : really ?
Me : I promise you that

She gets over me , straddling

me

I place my hands on her lower

waist

We lock eyes

Me : I don’t like that look

She smiles

Rain : just try , if it becomes too

much I’ll tell you

Me : I don’t have a cow yet for

damages

She laughs , pulling my t-shirt

off
She slept just wearing it , she’s
left now with just a panty on

Me : are you sure ?

She leans down and we kiss

Rain : I am very sure

I flip her over , getting on top of

her
I part her legs getting in
between them

She deepens the kiss , placing

her hands on my back

I pull my briefs off , and pull her

panty down

She lifts her legs and , it slides

off
I bring her legs up to her chest

Trailing down , slowly pulling

out of the kiss

I trail down , planting kisses to

her lower stomach

Sliding down to her coochie

She lifts her head slowly , we

lock eyes
I part her coochie lips with my
tongue

Rain : baby what …..oh my gosh

!

She gasps as I nibble on her clit

I bring my thumb over , as I

slide my tongue down to her
open
She lets out sweet moans

Rain : oh my gosh …..I feel ….

Me : it’s okay

She brings her thighs together

Bringing her hands to my head ,

just pushing me further down
her thighs
As an orgasm hits her
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Thonga : should we stop ?

Is he crazy ?

I shake my head , trying to catch

my breath
He chuckles

Thonga : are you sure ?

Me : yeah

He rubs his dick on my coochie

I am so scared right now , I

could run for my life
And as he pushes in , I feel like
screaming my lungs out

I bite my lower lip , muffling my

screams and moans

Tear just stream down my face

This fucking hurts

And he deep groans

Thonga : I am sorry , I am sorry I
am hurting you

He’s sorry but happy , yhoh !

A loud roar of thunder from

outside , startles me out of my
pain

And he just goes on to thrusts in

I part my legs further

Trying to accommodate him
better

I think if I’m more open , it will

hurt less

But the pain goes on for a while

, I want to cry

I’m just listening to the sound of

the rain
And his deep groans and grunts

He slowly moves back , and I

feel his cum trailing down to my
ass

After a few seconds gathering

himself

He slides back in , leaning over

and we kiss
I get lost in the feeling of
pleasure just taking all over my
body
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
He pecks my lips

Me : this rain is crazy

Bayede : the whole day and no
rest

He sits down next to me

Me : how is he ?

Bayede : he looks good ,

changed and too different too .
But I think being here , is what
he needed
I nod slowly

He’s right , our son looks so

different

But he looks good , and he’s

okay

I think that’s what we wanted

for him more than anything else
My phone rings , Bayede hands
it to me

Emotions just overwhelm me

He laughs

Bayede : I told you to let go

I roll my eyes answering my

phone
Me : Ghatsheni

He laughs

Zweli : babe how are you ?

Me : I am well

Zweli : that’s good , and is

Thonga coming along fine ?
Me : he is doing good , I am
actually happy

Zweli : I am glad , you need this

peace

Me : yeah , we’ll be back soon

Zweli : I can’t wait to see you

Me : I miss you
And Bayede pinches me , I
almost scream

Zweli : you’ll make it all up to

me , when you get back

Me : most definitely , but don’t

you miss me ?

He laughs

Me : Zweli !
Zweli : baby ?

Me : don’t you miss me ?

Zweli : babe , how do you even

ask ?

Me : you didn’t say you miss me

too

Zweli : I will rather show you

Me : I am sad and hurt , you
really should be missing me

Zweli : you’re so far , I can’t

baby you . Stop with the sulking
, I love you okay ?

Me : well , at least you love me

Zweli : and I won’t sulk that you

didn’t say you love me too
We laugh

He drops the call

Bayede : fuck ! After God fear

women

Me : shut up

He stares at me taking my t-
shirt off
Me : we need to stop having sex
in other people’s houses

He laughs
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 28*
*Nomakhosi*
We’re leaving today
And it’s a bit heavy , having to
say goodbye again

But he seems okay

He’s happy here , the people

seem to be very welcoming to
him

Me : I hope you don’t decide to

stay here forever
He chuckles

And it’s so deep , he reminds

me of his grandfather
Nkosiyabo

Me : remember Rain , even if

you don’t come back for us . Do
come back for her

Thonga : Mom , I will be back

Now I feel like I will get my son
back

Me : let us leave you , Rain

you’ll find us in the car

He holds her hand

He seems to be so in love with

her
Well , they seem to be in love
with each other

Honestly , it’s amazing to

witness and see young love
again

Bayede : Mtwana

They both laugh

It will take time for me

To adjust to this deep voice
from Thonga

It doesn’t even sound like him

Thonga : that’s so awkward

calling me that

Bayede : exactly how it feels

when you call me that
Such two weird men

We walk away from them

My phone rings

Bayede : I have to talk to Hawu

Me : I’ll be in the car

I walk to the car answering the

call
Me : hello ?

And all I hear is just sniffs

Me : hi ….who is this ?

Voice : please talk to Bayede ,

he said he wants out . He has
been ignoring my calls since you
left , I thought he was kidding
but he clearly wasn’t . Please
talk to him , he listens to you .
And I knew he will hear you out

What the hell ?

He didn’t even tell me any of

this

Swazi : please , I’m sorry to

bother you ..but I’m pregnant .
And I don’t want to raise this
child alone
I want to tell her that we’re
coming back today

And they will talk then

But maybe he didn’t tell her

It’s hard for me to tell her

Swazi : please
Me : I …..wait until he’s back
and talk

Swazi : I don’t want to be a

single mother Nomakhosi

Me : we’re ex’s , I don’t think

it’s right we interfere with each
other marriages

Swazi : I’m the one asking

I sigh

Me : I hear you but ….just talk

to him okay . I have to go

I drop the call

I cannot believe Bayede right

now

I should have taken him serious

Because once he says
something , he definitely means
it

This feels like it’s a mess now

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Me : don’t cry
She smiles

Rain : I wish you will come back

soon

Thonga : I will be , I promise you

She leans over for a hug

Me : I love you baby

Rain : I love you too

We spent the whole of
yesterday just cooped up in the
chamber I’m using

Just making love , in the cloudy

weather we had

It was just a beautiful day

Something I will never forget ,

and will always cherish
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
As we walk to the car

Both the king and queen

approach us

We had already said goodbyes

I hope nothing is wrong now

King Hawu : Ndabezitha

They both chuckle

Queen Nomhle : thank you for

visiting our kingdom , you
graced our lands and mother
nature resounded . I was very
happy of the rain
Oh lord !

This woman is one with nature

Meaning she knows what we

did

Which is why there was that

rain yesterday

Me : uhm ….
She laughs

Queen Nomhle : do not worry ,

it’s our secret

Now that she says that , I see

just how the king and Thonga
are confused

Me : thank you
We both laugh

She graces me with a hug , I

gladly return it

Queen Nomhle : hold on to him

, it won’t be easy . But never
feel obliged to choose , just
know he’s the right choice

She moves back after that

whisper
I swallow

Just wondering exactly what will

be standing in the way of this
relationship
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Me : hi babe
He laughs

I lean over giving him a kiss for a

few minutes

Me : sorry I am late

Venus : it’s okay , you need

anything before we go ?

I shake my head
Venus : okay , let’s go

Been dating for two days

officially

And now he has me going to

spend the weekend at his house

He takes my hand into his

I smile watching him drive

I hope I will be very cautious
about this one

And not let my stupidity get the

best of me

Like it did with Thonga

Seeing all the signs there

But ignoring them

Crying for 5 years that we spent
together

The 5 years that most definitely

don’t even matter to him

I am here with eyes wide open

Venus : where did you get lost

to ?

I laugh
Me : nowhere , don’t mind me

Venus : don’t worry , we will

have a great weekend

Me : no doubt

He chuckles
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 29*
*Bayede*
Swazi : you came back ?

I slept at a different hotel last

night

I didn’t want to come here and

face Swazi
Me : I came to get you

Swazi : we’re going back home ?

She asks with a smile

Me : no , we’re going to Khosi’s

house

She sighs
Swazi : how long will we be here
for ?

I look at her

Swazi : I am tired of this place ,

what changed your mind now
about going to Khosi’s house ?

Me : I didn’t say we’re going to

stay there
Swazi : you just got back
together , so exactly what are
we going to do there ?

Me : to talk

She takes a deep breath

Swazi : Are you over what you

said now about the marriage ?

Me : no , we’re still separating

Swazi : Bayede

Me : leave it , I am not changing

my mind about that . The same
way , I’m co-parenting with
Khosi I’ll do the same with you

Swazi : you and Khosi got to

raise your son together , he was
old when you separated
I chuckle

Me : so would you like that we

push more years until the baby
is old ? Then we will part ways

Swazi : I don’t want any

separation

Me : unfortunately that’s not

your decision alone
Swazi : and so is separation !

I shrug

Swazi : you go to your baby

mama , I am not going
anywhere

Me : that’s fine as well , I mean

we’re going to talk about our
son anyways . It’s family
matters
She chuckles

Swazi : so I am no longer family

now ?

Me : well

I walk to the wardrobe

Swazi : what are you doing

Bayede ?
Me : moving out …..

Swazi : you can’t bring me here

and then pull this stunt

Me : you came because you

didn’t want to stay behind

Swazi : well , now I want to go

back let’s go
I don’t know who does she
think she is that I’ll listen to her
, and do what she wants

I chuckle

Me : you can go back , I am not

moving back

Her jaw drops

I pack my clothes into my bag

Swazi : you should have just
told me you’re not in this
forever , I wouldn’t have gone
and gotten pregnant for your
pathetic self

Me : remember how you got

yourself , I told you I didn’t want
more kids . I’ve lost enough
kids with Khosi , and the only
one alive was just enough . But
no , you got into fertility pills
and made sure you’re pregnant

Swazi : because I love you

Bayede , and I wanted us to
have our own child

Me : I never wanted this child

Swazi : well , this child is here

and I can’t do anything about
that . Wether you like it or not
Me : it’s still early , go and abort

She gasps in shock

I take out my phone , sending

her money

Me : there … there’s money , go

and abort . From this forth , me
and you don’t have a child
together . If you dare bring me
that , we will have serious
problems

I take out my ring

Me : this marriage wasn’t even

legalized , and bare in mind I
didn’t even pay any bride price .
So we’re done

I grab my bag walking out

Her scream graces my ears , as I
walk away
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : are you out of your mind ?

He looks at me , looking very

bored

Like he’s bored

Me : your domestic issues are
starting to bore me , you don’t
see my husband crying to you

He laughs

Bayede : he knows he took my

woman

Me : shut up !
He shrugs

He’s really not taking this

seriously

His so called wife just called me

crying hysterical , it was so sad I
almost felt sorry for her

Saying this one gave her money

to go have an abortion
And she’s going ahead with it ,
she’s already booked an
appointment

She’s also crazy like this one

If she can’t keep her own child

because Bayede is a dog , then
she’s stupid

And she clearly didn’t want the

baby to begin with
But it’s her choice , I don’t care

It’s not my child

I lost so many kids , so this just

annoys me

I wanted my kids and God took

them away from me
She’s taking that opportunity of
being a mother away from
herself

And what I wouldn’t give to

have just one more child

Me : you two are stupid !

Bayede : it’s not like I wanted to

have different flavours of kids ,
Swazi can go ahead and do
what she wants . I don’t force
her to have this baby , because
she might just end up resenting
the baby because of me . Now
that’s stupid

I sigh

Me : Bayede what is wrong with

you ?

Bayede : nothing
I shake my head slowly

Me : I am not divorcing my
husband , just because your
marriage failed

He laughs

Bayede : you will tell him the

truth
Me : like hell I will

The look he gives me , leaves

me cold in my stomach

Me : Mageba no ….

I sigh

This is pointless

And it won’t get us anywhere

Me : I can’t believe you would
want to do this to me , why not
ruin your own marriage alone ?

Bayede : I felt Swazi , cause I

want to be with you

I shake my head

He holds my hand
Bayede : me and you took vows
, until death do us apart . We
lived by our vows , not what we
have been doing with Zweli and
Swazi

I pull my hand back from him

Me : Zweli will be home soon ,

come inside

I turn walking inside the house

Last night on our flight back

Thongalethu called us

And he said some shocking

things

Said he was scared to tell us

face to face , and when I think
about it I understand why
Now we just have to break
those news to Zweli

He said he will come back home

soon

And I want him here with me

So I need Zweli knowing , so I

can know if my son will be
welcomed when he comes back
here or not
I mean , it’s not everyday you
hear someone has changed
drastically like Thonga has

We read about such things

We don’t even think they really

exist

We can accept him , cause he’s

ours . But will Zweli accept him
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 30*
*Nomakhosi*
Me : so that’s that

He sighs
I just told him everything that
Thonga told us

About his great great great

grandfather uMageba

Having to take upon that gift ,

going through the initiation

And now going to be a

traditional healer
As well as now this royal
ancestor who has possessed
him

Having duties now to Isilo

Kingdom

As their protector

It’s a lot for anyone to take in

Even I was just shocked

Even now I still can’t believe

that’s my son now

I never saw him as one who can

take upon a traditional gift

Especially hearing my son say

he now turns into some wild
animal
But when he said Rain knows
everything

Yet still wants to be with him

I figured how much more me as

his mother

I will not turn my back on him

Not now not ever

And if this ancestor can possess
one of their own

Then he will leave my son

I don’t know how that will

happen

Especially if he’s still alive

But I don’t care

Changed as he is , he’s my child

Right now , I don’t know what

to make of the way he’s looking

Me : excuse me

I get up leaving them there

If Zweli doesn’t want Thonga

back
I don’t know how this marriage
will continue to work

Because I will never choose a

man over my child

I get in the kitchen and pour

myself a glass of water

I down it , just taking deep

breaths
After going through so much
together

Having him on my side

Taking care of Thonga , and

loving him like his own

Accepting my fear of ever

carrying another child , and only
to loose the child to death
Not leaving when things got
tough

He stayed and loved me with all

my flaws

It would really be heart

breaking to now loose him this
way

But I also know , it’s hard for

anyone to accept what they
don’t understand . This is not a
normal situation

Maybe Bayede was right , and I

should be honest with Zweli
once and for all

So he can make a decision to

move if that’s what he wants

What a way for the truth to

finally come down
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Me : baby

Thonga : mhm

He looks at me
Me : I miss you

He dashes me a smile

Thonga : ever since you got dick

, you’re always crying for me

I laugh

Me : you’re mocking me really ?

He chuckles
Thonga : listen to you crying
right now

This idiot of mind

Me : am I not supposed to miss

my baby ?

Thonga : miss him all you want

baby , he misses you more . It’s
just torture
Me : don’t lie , I was there just
yesterday

Thonga : it’s lies because I say

so ?

Me : baby bye

Thonga : I called you , don’t

drop this call on me
Me : I have to go study

Thonga : I’ll call when you’re

done ?

Me : yes , please do

Thonga : okay , I love you .

Don’t ever forget that

Me : I love you too , I’ll always

remember that
He smiles before dropping the
call

I heave a sigh

I mean , I really do miss him

I wonder how long it’ll take him

to come back

This distance is just insane

But I understand the
importance of him being there

For both his blood ancestor ,

and Isilo ancestor to get along

Also to know the traits of Isilo

That’s in his best interest

So I will wait until he’s back

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
King Hawu : you’re always
happy and smiling after a talk
with her

This man

I chuckle
Me : she makes me happy ,
looking back I never thought I’ll
fall in love , and so hard . Like
she’s the first thought in the
morning , and the last thought
before bed

King Hawu : I will give you 5

cows from the Bangani kraal ,
you’ll go and pay damages to
Mampofu
Me : for real ?

He nods

Me : wow , thank you so much .

King Hawu : you’re one of us

now , I am no blue blood . But
here I am king , to this kingdom
. You’re not one of their own ,
but you’re here carrying their
biggest ancestor . You’re
entitled to what we have , we
have to take care of you

Wow

This is like an honour and a

huge privilege
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
I walk back in the lounge

And he’s sitting alone

I don’t even want to ask where

Bayede is

Me : there’s something I need

to tell you

I pull a chair and sit down

He looks at me and smiles

The love in his eyes is just so

evident

And very hard to deny

I hate that now I’m going to be

the very same person who’s
going to hurt him

It pains me , cause I love him

Zweli : do you want an open
marriage or a divorce ?

My jaw drops

And he laughs

I don’t know if he was making a

joke or what

Me : what ?
Zweli : I did not make a mistake
my love , and I didn’t stutter
either

Oh my God !

Me : why would you ask me

such a thing ?

He moves from his seat , and

pulls the one next to me
He takes my hand into his

Zweli : I know about you and

Zulu , I have always known

Jesus !

No words can explain my shock

right now

My heart is pounding
Zweli : so , do you want an open
marriage or a divorce ? Because
if it’s a divorce you want , it’s
not happening . So call him in ,
and we can talk about this as
adults

No ways !

This has to be a dream of some

kind
Zweli : he’s outside having a
smoke , call him in so we can
talk

He lets out a slight laugh , and

pulls me for a kiss

I can’t even kiss him back

What he just said has taken me

by shock
I get up swallowing hard

I walk outside , and he’s leaning

by the car

I walk to him

Bayede : what’s wrong ?

He looks so concerned
Me : he knows ….Zweli knows
about us . He has always known
, I asked to talk to him . And he
just asked me if ……if I want a
divorce or an open marriage

And he laughs

Bayede : what’s shocking you ? I

mean the guy knew he took you
from me , and I was going
nowhere . Let’s go talk
I look at him as he walks inside
the house

My knees just go weak , my

heart beating so fast

I gather myself and my strength

, before I walk in

And they’re both sitting down

Me : I am sorry

Zweli : my love , don’t do that ..

we’re all adults here . And no
one is fighting another

He pulls a chair

Zweli : come sit down baby

Me : Zweli are you seeing

someone ?
That’s the only way why he
suggest such a thing

Zweli : no

Me : I don’t believe you

Zweli : it’s not time for lies now

, if I was seeing someone I
would tell you . But I am not
I sigh sitting down

Zweli : Zulu I am not leaving my

wife , I know she loves me
enough to see our marriage
through . If she wanted to leave
, I would let her leave in peace

Me : I told him I am not leaving

you or our marriage

Zweli : baby I know

He turns his gaze to Bayede

Zweli : this is the situation we

find ourselves in , we’ve always
been in a situation . Now we
can stop hiding and pretending ,
it’s a inventible situation . I am
not divorcing , and I will never
give her a divorce . But to spot
the pretence and sneaking
around . I am allowing an open
marriage , provided that only
she sees you and no other man
. And Zulu if you get someone ,
you leave her alone , we cannot
have a circus here .

Bayede chuckles

Zweli : you will be the only man

allowed in this marriage , that’s
why you cannot bring another
person .
This is crazy

Me : Zweli you cannot tell me

you’re not seeing anyone , yet
you’re saying such things . Who
is she ?

He smiles

Zweli : there’s no one ,

whatever you decide . Either he
goes , and for good . Or we
keep the open marriage , and if
someone’s comes I will let you
know . For now , we’re here on
you two . Don’t let it ruin the
fun now that I’ve brought you
together , now you can be with
him without feeling bad about
me whatsoever . Don’t keep it a
secret , just to me . I don’t
mean go around parading him ,
you’re still a married woman
legally . And that’s never going
to change , decide .
He gets up

And places a peck on my lips ,

he grabs his car keys and walks
out

Bayede : yeah men just know

when they cannot win

I look at him , and he grins

Bayede : I am not an idiot , I
know what I lost when I lost you
. Even he knows it , that’s why
he’s not willing to be an idiot
and loose you . He will rather
share you knowingly , do fear
women after God . Because
what’s this ? A whole open
marriage , soft life bits by bits
with a fork

And he laughs , I think I am the

only one who doesn’t get this
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 31*
*FOUR MONTHS LATER*
*Rain*
Mom : stop crying

I just can’t help it

Me : he’s not happy with me

It’s like it’s just one thing after

the other with me

After my coming of age

ceremony

My uncle went on about how

there was a presence in our
midst that day
And I caught on it , that it was
Thongalethu

That’s who he felt around here

Then the 5 cows he received

Knowing what they were for

He wasn’t happy about that as

well
Even though Thonga took
accountability for it

And then a month ago , I found

out I was pregnant

I have been home since then

My father is not happy at all

He is furious with me
He hasn’t even said anything to
me

I don’t know what life awaits

me now

I am four months pregnant ,

and showing

Thongalethu knows , and his

family
They also weren’t happy when
they found out that I’m a
princess

It was just a mess

Honestly it felt like queen

Nomhlekhabo’s words were
coming to pass

When she said it won’t be easy

Thongalethu has been there
this whole time

I don’t know when he will be

back

Today his family is here

They’ve come to pay damages

for the child
I don’t know how my father is
going to accept them

I just can’t help but be weary of

everything

Mom : this is about the baby ,

this stress is not good

I haven’t talked to Thonga today

That also didn’t help much

Mom : I’ll call Busi to come help
you finish getting dressed

I just nod

Right now I need to know

what’s happening with my
father and his family
.
.
.
.
*Mahlubandile*
I wonder how my good friend
Nkosiyabo is feeling where he is

But this right here , I am not for

it at all

Maybe if he was still around , he

would be the voice of reason
I have nothing against his
grandson

But he’s mixed with royals now

With tainted blood , and a great

ancestor within him

That makes him belong to the

other , there’s no way that
Ngwe and Isilo can exist
together
That will never happen

Two wild beats , it has never

been

These two are different species

I was very angry when I got

those 5 cows

Paying for the pride of Rain

And then I had to find out she’s
carrying his seed

That just put me in a bad space

I don’t even think they

understand the depths of this

Them having a child together

It’s just a lot

King Hawu : we understand how
much we have wronged you ,
also we do take responsibility of
everything that one of our own
has done

I chuckle

Me : I don’t know how things

are done with your kingdom
Jola , but in mine I want to
know what I mix with my blood
. You went on to crown a
commoner , and put him in a
high place with a such a
powerful honour . And he has
come into my kraal , not once
but twice now

He sighs

King Hawu : the ways of the

ancestors are unknown to us ,
and therefore we cannot deny
nor dispute what they decide

Me : a royal blood mixed like

this , and you want me to open
my kingdom to such . I don’t
know what this baby will come
bearing , and my duty is my
people first

They look at each other with

Zulu
Me : your father and I we were
good friends , my wife even
assisted in helping your mother
with channelling her gift . Trust
me , our families go way back .
But I do not condone this , and I
will not accept it

Hawu sighs

Me : I will accept this damage

King Hawu : we thank you

Me : my daughter will remain

here , and once your child has
been born you will take him or
her

Bayede : what ?

Me : that child will not be raised

in my palace , and my daughter
now needs to remain home .
That’s a crown princess

Bayede : you cannot separate a

mother and child

Me : I can , either you take that

or you turn right now with your
damages . And I will see what to
do

I don’t care what they say

But right now , that baby is
something we don’t know

I cannot have that

I have fought many battles that

were just beyond me

I will not invite another one ,

not at the expense of my
kingdom
The father’s biological blood ,
then there’s Isilo

We cannot deny the paternity

of the ancestor upon that child

This baby is going to be a

mixture of things we do not
know

And that’s dangerous

I am very much sceptical about
things I don’t know

Having to fight witches , for

years and years

The peace treat with the white

witches as well

I would rather we keep things

as they are
In this peace we have been in
all along

Me : I have fought many battles

, I do not desire to fight another
. I am not going to keep that
child anywhere near my throne
, maybe years later Rain can
decide to reconcile . But once
she’s no longer queen to this
kingdom
It goes completely silent
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
I cannot believe this

My father just texted me , and

told me what Rain’s father has
said
I know the man doesn’t like me

But to separate Rain from our

child , now that’s extreme

It’s not like I am running away

Things are just going south

For four months really , we

haven’t known peace
I don’t know how Rain is going
to take this

We have been speaking all

week

And she knew my family was

coming

But she didn’t say anything

about this
Unless her father didn’t tell her

This is just a fucked up situation

Taking the baby away from Rain

, is the same as breaking us up

I text my father asking him what

they’re going to do now

Do they accept the conditions

Or they want Rain to keep the
baby and be there

But what will her father do , if

the decision comes to that ?

The past four months have

been shit

Not being able to be with Rain

everyday
And she’s with my child

I just couldn’t wait to be with

her

But now all of that is threatened

Just when I am done with

initiation under water

And have taken my duties at

Isilo
I’m supposed to be going home

I was happy that after this we

can finally be back together in
Joburg with our child

Now , I don’t know

It’s hard to even believe really

my grandfather and this man
were friends
That our families got along

Because he has never shown

me that courtesy ever

From the first day he saw me

King Hawu said it’s because he’s

just like me , and can turn into a
tighter . The two beats , will
never get along
But isn’t he taking this too far ?

Separating Rain and the child

Can’t he just wait maybe until

the baby grows

And we can see if she or he

possess something , then find a
way of how we can co exist
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 32*
*Rain*
I’m listening to my father talk

And I cannot such words are

coming out from him
My first love

Today he’s putting such a

burden on me

Making me choose between his

kingdom and the fruit of my
womb

I don’t want to believe that my

father is saying this
But I’m here

I can hear him well

I can’t stop the tears that are

just streaming down my face

Dad : that’s my saying , and I

won’t change that

I just want to run out of here

But I do not want to make
myself a spectacle , or him even
. I still respect him

Especially not in front of the

king and his brother’s

Along with Mr Zulu

King Hawu : we will still like to

pay the damages
Does this mean they agree with
what my father said ?

Taking my child away ?

Dad : you can excuse us

princess

Say no more

I am on my feet in seconds
walking out of the chamber
I go to my chamber and lock
myself in

Ignoring my mother’s knocks

after a few minutes

I don’t want to see anyone right

now

Maybe I should have hid this

Maybe I shouldn’t have come
home like the child that I am

And out of respect told them

what happened

Today my very own parents are

making me regret telling them
about my pregnancy

My phone rings
I grab it , only because I set his
ringtone aside from everyone
else

Me : hello ?

Even my voice is ditching me

Thonga : baby no ….

I just break down

Me : did they tell you what my
father said ?

He sighs

I am guessing they told him

Me : he wants me to give my
child away to you and your
family

Thonga : that can never happen

Me : Thonga I cannot leave
home forever , this land
survives on me being here . I
cannot run away with this child ,
I will be killing everyone here

Thonga : whoa ! No one is

running away , no one is doing
that . Your father is angry , but
eventually he will calm down
Me : you don’t know him !

Thonga : that’s fine , but I know

he hates me . Our child ties us
together , and that’s what he
doesn’t want

And he’s using the fact that this

child is too mixed

With all different kinds of

bloods
I don’t care what they say

I just don’t care what they do

I am not letting them separate

me from my child

Thonga : whatever happens , I

will make sure our child knows
you . That he or she grows up
knowing you’re her mother , I’ll
make sure of that . I will call you
everyday , you will get to talk as
much as you wish . I will do
whatever it takes to make sure ,
that you two don’t loose each
other ….

Me : are you saying I should just

accept this , and give you our
baby once he’s born ?

He sighs
Thonga : I am not saying that , I
just don’t want you and your
father at loggerheads especially
because I’m the cause

Wow

I don’t know

Maybe I am too hurt right now

But he sounds like he has given
up

That he’s ready for me to just

give birth , and give them the
child

Thonga : baby are you still there

?

I wipe my tears
The pain I am feeling right ,
comes to nothing

All my father cares about is his

throne

And clearly , Thonga is not

loosing anything

He’s getting his child

That’s all he cares about clearly

Me : I will stay away from you ,
until your child is here and you
can take him . I will stay away
from you all

Thonga : what ……

I drop the call and block his

number , along with his
mother’s number . I block it
I take out my simcard from the
phone and break it

All that talk about how he will

make sure the baby knows me

So my own child has to be

introduced to me

Like I’m some stranger , and not

the mother who have birth to
him
Maybe I am over reacting right
now

But Thongalethu didn’t say

what I expected from him

He sounded so defeated

So if I fight , then I’m fighting

alone
This was not how I thought this
day would go like
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Me : fuck !

Mom : whoa ! You don’t get to

swear in front of me like this

I give her phone back

I had asked for her phone so I
can use it to make a call

But it’s the same thing as mine

Me : I’m sorry

Mom : what’s going on ?

I sigh
Mom : okay , I know it may
sound stupid to ask .
Considering everything that
happened

I sit down

We’re back at the hotel

Me : I called Rain , we talked .

Yes she was crying and all , but I
think I made things worse . I
said something like I’ll make
sure our child knows her
mother , and she took it like I’m
giving up

Mom : are you ?

Me : mom ! Of course not

That would just be stupid

I love Rain more than anything

I rub my thumb under my eye

Mom : please calm down , I

cannot have you going all Isilo
no everyone here

Me : she must have blocked us ,

and destroyed the SIM card

I know I cannot go to the palace

I already have way too many
faults in that place

Now how do I get a hold of her

? I just want us to talk , so I can
explain myself better

Maybe in a way that she’s going

to understand my words

All I know is that no mother can

be separated from child
Especially if the mother has no
interest whatsoever giving away
her child

I know Rain

My only worry is that , she’s

now stuck between a rock and
hard place

It’s a fucking mess

How does she choose between
her child and kingdom ?

I never thought her father could

be this ruthless , and heartless

But I need to talk to Rain

.
.
.
.
*INSERT 33*

*Nomakhosi*
Zweli : how is he ?
I take the lotion and sit down

Me : not good , and I am

worried

Zweli : yeah , I understand babe

We’re back home

It’s been a few days , and

Thongalethu is shutting
everyone out
We tried reaching out , but the
calls don’t even last two
minutes

This situation with Rain , is

taking a toll on him . I can tell
he’s not okay at all

I know there are other means

we can contact her
But I also think she needs her
space

Right now she feels deserted

And feels like we took her

father’s side for paying
damages

Like maybe we also don’t care

about her
Just as long as we take the baby

And that is not what happened

We love Rain

As much as it was shock to us to

find out she’s a princess

But we love her

And we got over that

And still continued to support
this relationship

I honestly think she’s good for

my son

Ever since she came into his life

Thongalethu has changed , I

swear now he lives up to his
name
He’s the son I ordered

And it’s all thanks to Rain

So how can I not love her ?

Me : I didn’t think that king will

be so hard

Zweli : it doesn’t make sense to

me at all , what kind of a father
tells her daughter to give her
child away ?

Me : I think it’s because we’re

commoners really

Zweli : this is nonsense , at the

end of the day we’re all human
beings

Me : this is what I was scared of

, when we found out Rain was a
princess . At that time it looked
like I don’t support the
relationship , but I was being
realistic . It’s not easy being
with someone that has more
status than you do

Zweli : I think these people just

exaggerate these royal business
, and it’s not even that deep

I laugh
Zweli : what ?

Me : babe , did you just say it’s

not that deep ?

Zweli : oh but it’s not , they

bleed blood like us . It’s not
even blue I tell you

Wow !
Zweli : but Thonga will be okay .
He has come a long way , he’s
all about sane decisions these
days . He’s starting his new job
today , trust me he will be fine .
And he’ll fix this

He gave him a job at his

company

I was so grateful for that

At least he will be doing
something while we waits for
next year to start varsity again

He gets up and fixes his tie

I look at him

He’s even gotten a fresh hair

cut

Me : you look happy these days

He smiles

Zweli : I’ve always been happy

Me : but it’s different

Zweli : different how babe ?

Me : is there someone ?
He laughs , I can’t even force a
smile

Zweli : hah ! Jealousy so early in

the morning

I heave sigh

Lotioning my legs

Zweli : come on , come here

He sits down on the bed ,
holding his hand out

I get up and walk to him

He lifts the towel , making me

straddle him

Zweli : we sat down and agreed

, and reached an agreement like
adults
Me : I know that , that’s why I’m
asking

He smiles

Zweli : the agreement was ,

when there’s someone I will let
you know . The same way I will
let her know , I’m a married
man and very much happy in
my marriage . It’s just an open
marriage , where we can see
other partners . With conditions
of course , I cannot parade her .
And I can’t commit to anything
serious , and definitely no
having sex without protection .
No bringing babies into my
marriage from another woman ,
it’s just fun that will end there .
She stays away from you , and
doesn’t even get to greet you

He cups my face
Zweli : now I haven’t told you
there’s someone , because
there isn’t . And we know if I
don’t do what we agreed on ,
then it’s definitely cheating and
bringing a third party into our
marriage . I will never cheat on
you baby

Me : I’m sorry

He chuckles pecking my lips

Zweli : don’t apologize , I love
seeing this . At least I know you
don’t want no woman next to
your man

We laugh

Me : I guess , I just want to see

you happy knowing what’s
making you happy . If it’s
another woman , then at least
I’ll know . Maybe I am jealous ,
but I’ll learn to accept it

Zweli : I am always happy ,

there’s no one here

I nod slowly

Zweli : I love you

Me : I love you too baby

I lean over and we kiss

It’s been crazy

He wasn’t hearing anything

about a divorce

And well , Bayede made it clear

he’s not going anywhere

I really had no reason

whatsoever to divorce Zweli
So we settled on the open
marriage

Of course on my side with just

Bayede

If what we have was to come to

an end

Then there wouldn’t be another

man I would focus on
I just don’t see that one
happening

With Bayede the history just

goes way too deep

And it’s not easy to just walk

away like that

But so far Zweli hasn’t told me

about any woman
I don’t know if he will actually
have one

Or he just allowed me to be
married to him

And also have a boyfriend on

the side

There were those boundaries

though
Bayede doesn’t come around
the house anymore

He has settled fine

He bought a house , that’s

where Thonga is at

He decided to go live with his

father
It wasn’t hard moving his
company this side

So basically his life is set again

in South Africa
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
I sigh leaning back
Dad : you look like shit on your
first day at work

I chuckle

Me : I feel like shit , I don’t look

like it . I’m still as handsome as
they come , please don’t mock
the Mageba genes

He laughs
Me : how’s the awkward
relationship ?

I don’t get this thing of theirs

Dad : there’s nothing awkward

there

Me : everything about it is
awkward , I don’t understand
how three grown ups come to
such a decision
I’ve known this for three
months now

And at first , I thought it was a

joke . And I laughed it off like
one

But turned out not

That was until I found my

mother in his house
And it was clear she had spent
the night there

To even be so open about it , to

tell Zweli

He was away on business , and

he came back a day earlier

So she informed him about her

whereabouts
Mind you , he got it and
understood she wasn’t at his
house because of me

So that to me is just fucked up

And my father seems very fine

I don’t get how Zweli is fine with

this
And worse , to hear he’s the
one who suggested it

Our parents really do things

that will embarrass us

The separation with dad and

Swazi

Also the fact that she aborted

the baby she was carrying
No one ever saw or heard from
her again

This one is just moving on with

Zweli’s wife

Me : I would never share Rain

with another man knowingly

Dad : that is still on ? I thought

she dumped you
I laugh

Me : dumped who ? In her

wildest dreams , I am not going
anywhere . That woman is your
daughter in law

He laughs

Dad : don’t give up on her

Me : I won’t
That will never happen

I will be going back there , and I

will get her to understand me
and what I was trying to say

Me : I don’t see Rain being

separated from her child

The look he gives me , carries a

lot
Like there’s just something
behind it

Or maybe he’s recalling

something

Maybe the situation is

reminding him or another

And I wonder what’s that about

?
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 34*
*Bayede*
Me : is this fine ?

She nods

I walk over and hand her the

cup
Khosi : thanks

I pack her cheek sitting down

next to her

Me : how’s the pain ?

Khosi : a bit steep today cause

it’s cloudy

Me : mhm
Khosi : I think I will take this
bracelet off in a week

I chuckle

Me : you’re just stubborn

Khosi : leave me

Me : I went to visit your son

yesterday at his office
Khosi : and ?

I sigh

Me : he’s worrying me

Khosi : Rain ?

Me : MaKhumalo if we don’t
intervene here , and help these
kids I foresee history repeating
itself . And I don’t want that for
them , it wasn’t nice for us

Khosi : no , we cannot have Rain

alienated from her family

Me : that’s why I’m saying we

have to help them

Khosi : what can we do ? I know

that pain , being young and
pregnant . And being put in a
position or situation , where
you have to choose between
your child and your parents

Its been years , but I know there

are days where she wonders

If things had been different ,

between her and her parents

And our first pregnancy , how

would have things turned out
Khosi : I don’t know what we
will do , but we’ll just have to do
something . So they don’t go
through what we went through

Me : yeah , we’ll figure it out .

Before the baby is here

Khosi : talk to your son , so he

and Rain can make sane
decisions
I chuckle

Me : I thought he’s dumped ,

but he said no

We laugh

Khosi : he’s in denial , he

wanted to be told it’s over .
Rain was just in emotions
I hope we all can get over this
huddle

One thing I’m certain about , is

that my son loves Rain more
than anything
.
.
.
.
*Mahlubandile*
Zimkhitha : it’s been almost a
week now , and she’s locked
herself in her chamber .
Kumkani I am worried

I sigh

Me : my duty first comes to my

kingdom

Zimkhitha : you’re a father

before you’re king !

She raises her voice

Things have been tense
between us

Even with the other kids

I’m the one in the wrong here

They all just don’t see the

danger I am trying to avoid for
us all
That boy is inclined , operating
under his blood family

He also has a royal ancestor

within him , which makes his
blood half

Rain is inclined , operating

under Ngwe our ancestor

Also her great grandmother ,

from her mother’s side
With so much spirits , and the
mixes off blood

The fear is what child will turn

out to be

Either he or she will be good for

us

Or definitely an enemy that will

bring us down
Also there’s the chance and
possibility of being used

The witches have always looked

for loopholes in this royal family

And that child most definitely

can be one

But no one is thinking about

that
Zimkhitha : if we loose our
daughter , I swear it will be on
you

She walks out

This kingdom needs Rain ,

there’s no survival without her

She’s named Rain for a reason

Without her here , we stand to
lose from mother nature

And that means drought , and

drying of wombs

Ngwe declared her rain queen

to this kingdom

She is the one who brings us

rain
And the kingdom survives on
that
.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
I cannot believe my eyes

I haven’t seen Thonga in like

forever

Ever since he broke up with me

And now here is he

Looking like a man , and not the

guy I wasted 5 years of my time
with

What’s shocking , is the cloth he

has on his shoulders

He’s wearing a black slim fit suit

Holding what looks like a royal
sceptre

I actually don’t know one , but

I’ve always paid attention in
school during history class

Me : Thonga ?

He’s with some guy , I do not

know
They both turn their gaze to me

Me : oh my gosh , it is you

He smiles

Thonga : hi Winnie

Lord !

Even his voice has deepened

Me : wow you look so …..so
different

He chuckles

Thonga : yeah , growth does

that to one

Me : wow ! I am just shocked , I

mean this is you now ?
He places his and on the cloth

I realise the teeth like beaded

thing on his neck

Oh my goodness

He sure looks like one of them

traditional healers

Thonga : always has been

Me : don’t tell me , I accused
you of cheating with that girl
who had beads . And she was
just helping you with this ?

Thonga : oh but it’s not called

cheating , especially when the
relationship has been long over
. She did help me , yes . But
we’ve been together , even
then . We’re expecting our first
child
I let out a fade smile

With a lump struck on my

throat

Me : guess when it’s not meant

to be , then it’s not meant to be

Thonga : yeah

Me : well it’s all good , cause

I’ve moved on . I’m dating
Venus Sishi now , the premier’s
son . It’s been a bliss of almost
five months

Thonga : I am happy for you ,

the universe works in alignment
. And what doesn’t align can
never be

Wow !

Like I sure picked shade there

Thonga : it was good to see you

He turns and they walk away

I don’t know , but I feel a bit tad

sad

He didn’t even look like he cares

Like I guess what we had wasn’t

that deep for him
Cause he seems very fine
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 35*
*Rain*
Busi : your mother is worried

Me : I just want to be left alone

, and bond with my baby before
he’s taken away from me

She sighs
Busi : you think we can go out ?

I shake my head

Busi : I think it will do us good

Me : nothing will do me good

right now

Busi : please , just an hour away

from the palace
I sigh

I really don’t want to go

anywhere

Me : where will we go ?

Busi : go have candy

I laugh
Busi : I missed this laugh

Me : fine , but if I’m still moody

we’re coming back

Busi : definitely , I’ll leave you to

get ready

Me : just get me a glass of

water please

She walks out

I put on a clean dress and shoes
, grabbing my cloth

It’s hard to believe that my

father would do this to me

That he would bring me so

much pain

And the sad thing is that , out of

everyone else
I understand his fears more
than everyone else

But this is my child

And I can’t just give my baby

away

I just don’t see how I can do

that and be okay
He will resent me

I will not be queen forever that

is certain

But being a mother is for

eternity

Nothing can ever erase that

Busi walks back in

I take the water from her and
drink

Me : is Simo driving us ?

Busi : yes

I hope he doesn’t blab to my

parents

I just want space

We leave , and I see we’re going
out to town

Busi : this way

She says as we get out of the

car

Me : no long walks

Busi : just around the corner

Me : fine

We leave Simo in the car , going

to the candy shop

And I just can’t help but smile as

I see all the candy

Busi : now , this has done the

trick

I laugh
We walk around , just looking

And I go picking a few things

We head to the till to pay

Voice : let me

Oh my God !
I turn and drop a few of the
sweets

He leans down and picks them

up

Busi : you’ll find me in the car

Oh wow !

Now I think I get it

She tried getting me out a few
days ago

And I refused

Today she really wasn’t giving

up , and seeing him here it
means he asked her

Thonga : please , don’t walk

away from me . I had to beg
Busi for this , and I just can’t
stay away . Baby this can’t go on
, I’m going crazy without you

Me : you want my child

He smiles

Thonga : our child , let me pay

for this then we can go talk

I sigh
Thonga : I’ll explain myself
better , and what I was saying
baby . I understand how it came
out like , but that’s not how it
was intended . And that’s not
what I meant , I am not crazy .
Please give me a chance , the
chance you didn’t give me at
first . And you just blocked me ,
we don’t do that . We talk and
voice things out , we can’t do
what your father is doing to us .
He’s tearing us apart , and
shutting each other out means
we’re also helping him in that

Now I feel bad

He pays for the sweets

And we walk out of the shop

Heading to his car , and I’m

already munching on the
sweets just stuffing my face
Thonga : I think we should go to
the doctor for a scan , so we
can know the gender now

Me : I actually don’t want to

know , because it seems like I
won’t be a part of his of her life

I just call the baby he

Because I wish it’s a boy

He opens the door for me

I get in and he goes on to the

drivers side

Thonga : I missed you so much ,

I know you want space . But I
couldn’t stay away

I look at him
Thonga : I asked for a few days
at work

Me : how’s that working out ?

Thonga : good so far

Me : do keep the work , you

need it . Babies are expensive

He laughs
Me : and don’t bring your
women around my child ….

Thonga : whoa ! What women ?

Me and you are going to raise
our child together , wether your
father allows it or not . And
that’s what I meant , that
whatever happens our child will
know you . Because I will do
whatever it takes for you two to
know each other , I know you
cannot leave this kingdom .
They need you , and I love that
you won’t dessert them just
because of us . These people
cannot suffer , just because of
your father . Even if I’m to take
the child a week , it’s not like I’ll
be keeping her away from you .
I also cannot be here full time ,
cause I have to be at Isilo . We
just have to find a common way
that will work for us , and our
family . You’re not loosing your
child
Me : I was so sad

Thonga : I don’t understand

how you thought I would just be
glad to take the child away from
you

Me : it was just a lot , and it

sounded like you’re giving up

Thonga : you cut me off

He sighs

Thonga : you didn’t even give

me a chance to explain , you
cannot just judge first words .
Without hearing the full
explanation of things , I also
don’t want to loose my son .
You’ll be here , and I’ll be there .
So we have to share those
responsibilities , and it doesn’t
mean when he’s with me he
forgets about you . I don’t know
, maybe I just lack the right
words to explain

Me : just promise me you’re not

leaving us , not giving up that
we may never be together the
three of us

Thonga : that will never happen

I smile
Thonga : come here

He leans over , I meet him

halfway and we kiss

Me : I missed you

I missed him so bad

Thonga : I know , I missed you

more
I didn’t think he would come
around here

I thought maybe he will use the

opportunity of me cutting him
off

And just move on with his life

.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Me : I love you okay ?

She nods

Me : you don’t love me

anymore ?

She laughs
Me : my dad mocks me and say
you dumped me

Rain : I actually kind of like did

dump you

Me : hayhii (no)

I hold her hand

Me : and don’t tell him that

Rain : I won’t , I am glad we’re
okay

This is how things are just

supposed to be between us

Rain : even if I make peace with

this , I will know you have my
back

Me : it’s always just been us

baby , always
She heaves a sigh

Rain : If you were to move on ,

and find better . I wouldn’t
know what to do

Me : I moved , and found the

better . You’re the better , and
I’m glad I found that . From
hereon there’s no moving on ,
this is it for me
Rain : we can go see the doctor
before you leave

I smile

Me : we can do that tomorrow ,

I’m going to spend the few days
I have with you

Rain : thank you

I chuckle

Me : I love you baby

Rain : and I love you

Me : I have an ask

Rain : what ?

Me : please , be okay with your

parents
She sighs

Me : I don’t want you to end up

how I ended up with mine

She looks down

Me : baby please , you saw how

messed up I was . I don’t want
to ruin your relationship with
your parents , right now just be
okay with your father . And we
will deal with everything else as
time goes on , don’t let this
come between you two . He’s
your father , and at the end of
the day he loves you

She lifts her head and smiles

Rain : look at you , all grown up

. I am proud of myself , this is all
my doing
We laugh

Me : flex girl ! It’s your right

I pull her into a hug

I’m glad this is fixed

And now , we can look forward

into how we fix things with her
father
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 36*
*FIVE MONTHS LATER*
*Thongalethu*
Me : is she okay ?

Doc : yes , please cut the

umbilical cord
I cut it , but my worry is on Rain

The nurse hands me the baby

And she’s crying

Like this is a lot of crying , and

it’s too loud

Doc : don’t worry about her , it

took a lot for her to push
I hope he’s right

I’m trying to calm this one

But mhm , she’s a crier

My phone rings , I take it out

and answer

Me : ma (mom)

She laughs
Mom : oh my word ! Is that her
?

Me : yeah , she’s crying a lot .

And her mother is out of it

Mom : don’t worry , she will

wake up soon

Me : okay
I hope so

Mom : we will be there to see

them in the evening

Me : okay , I’ll see you then

I drop the call

Doc : we will move them from

this ward , we just have to finish
cleaning her up
I nod

And sit down

My daughter is so cute

She’s not even that tiny

I can’t believe she’s finally here

It’s been a hard road

Still things are sour with the

Mampofu people

More especially the king

I spent a week here , after our

last appointment

And we were told when the

baby will be born
And she’s a day early

I decided to come this side and

be here

I wouldn’t have missed this for

anything

Her mother is outside with her

sister and brother , as well as
Busi
We were at the hotel

But I still called Zitha , so he can

tell his family

The siblings have no quarrel

with me whatsoever

I hope now that the baby is

here , we can come with a
solution for us all
And a better one

Not separating Rain with our

child
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Me : it’s painful

Linani : you’ll get used to it

I don’t know

And she’s eating a lot

I think I’m going to lose so much

weight because of this tiny
person

And she cries a lot

But she’s calm now

I’m happy seeing my family here

Thonga said his parents are on

their way

I don’t know who will be here

Because the family dynamic of

those three is something else

But I know Mr Zulu will be here

He was so eager more than
anyone else

So looking forward to this baby

being here

That’s why we decided that her

grandfather’s will name her

I don’t know about my father

But that option is there for him
to also name her

Mom : you’re so into this

motherhood

Me : I guess it comes naturally

Things got better between us

After I was okay with Thonga

I reached out to my mother

And she didn’t shut me out

I don’t know about my father

I also didn’t put in much effort

Cause I felt like he doesn’t care

that much
.
.
.
.
*Bayede*
We arrived late

And the royal family had left the

hospital

But we had to come see the

baby
We couldn’t spend the night
without coming here

Me : I can’t believe I am a
grandfather , I am really old

They laugh

Rain : she has your eyes

She sure does

Me : it’s good genes

Thonga : come on stop

He chuckles

Khosi : what’s her name ?

Thonga : baby

Me : what the hell ?

They laugh

Me : no one is going to go
around calling my
granddaughter baby , no !

Zweli : it’s a nice name

Me : please don’t

Thonga : majority rules

Me : it’s not happening

Rain : we want you to name her

Okay !

I didn’t see that one coming

Khosi : why ? Is it because she

has his eyes ?
Rain laughs

Rain : she also has her father’s

mouth and nose , don’t get me
started on the ugly ears and
forehead . But no , grandfather
gets to name her

She sighs

And her face a very sad

expression
Rain : we wanted both of them
to , I just don’t know if my
father will be happy to do that

Me : don’t worry about him ,

these tiny people just have a
way of getting to us . He won’t
be able to help himself

She smiles
Thonga : please name her
something nice

Me : ngu Ntandokazi lona (this

is)

Thonga : ah mtwana ! You have

ruined my child

Khosi : it’s clear who already

rules
People and jealousy

Zweli : the power kids with such

names think they have ,
couldn’t you come up with
something else ?

I chuckle

Thonga : we should have really

considered this name thing
Rain : what ? I love Ntandokazi ,
it’s a beautiful name

Me : clearly you’re the only

people who like me here

Thonga : you’re always siding

with them

Me : you have been replaced ,

and Mtwana it’s okay
He frowns , he’ll get over it . I’m
a grandfather now because of
him , he’s an old man
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 37*
*Mahlubandile*
Zimkhitha : where are you going
?

I grab my jacket
Zimkhitha : I am worried , you
look like a young thing

I chuckle

Me : there’s no other for me ,

but only you MaMpinga

She smiles

Zimkhitha : so where are you

going ?
Me : I am going to the hospital

She goes quite

Me : what ?

She shakes her head tearing up

Zimkhitha : why do you want to

hurt our daughter like this ?
She sits down on the bed
breaking down

Zimkhitha : remember how you

protected me ? How you fought
for me against my family ?

She looks at me , with tears just

streaming down her face

Zimkhitha : today you’re doing

this to your own child , your
own flesh and blood ? What
happened to the Kumkani that
married me ?

I walk closer to her

Zimkhitha : what happened to

you ? If this is about your
precious kingdom , then you
can keep your kingdom and
leave my child alone . Do you
hear me , let’s see how your
precious people and kingdom
survive without their rain queen
her

I pull her up , and embrace her

But she tries pulling off , I hold

her tight

Zimkhitha : what you’re doing is

killing our child , and our
beautiful granddaughter
doesn’t even deserve this .
You’re not even giving them a
day or week together , you’re so
eager to just separate mother
and child . And for what ?

I heave a sigh , placing a kiss on

the side of her face

She bursts into a sob , and it’s

just heart wrenching
.
.
.
.
*Nomakhosi*
Me : do you think her father will
go easy on them now ? Or
maybe be a bit lenient , now
that Ntandokazi is here

He looks at me

Zweli : that man is too dramatic

for a man , and he has so much
anger . Honestly it cannot be
healthy

I laugh

Me : babe

Zweli : what ? He just annoys

me , see how Bayede melted
like a kid with a candy when he
saw her . What man wouldn’t
appreciate that ?
I sigh

This whole situation is hard on

Rain , and it’s just painful

Zweli : but I am sure that one ,

will just rock up with his anger .
Thonga should keep that baby
away from him

Me : that’s mean
Zweli : mean ? He’s so going to
transfer his bad energy to the
child , babies are too easy they
pick up on these things

Between him and Mahlubandile

, I don’t know who has anger
more

Just that my husband is always

calm
Me : I don’t like what he’s doing
to these kids , and it actually
makes me feel somehow . He
doesn’t like my child , and he’s
just belittling him

Zweli : he’s a fool , and Thonga

is just respecting him because
he was raised well . And he has
grown to be a better man , also
he loves his daughter more
dearly . The very same daughter
he’s punishing like this

He shakes his head , and you

can just tell he is annoyed

Zweli : where have you ever

heard of such nonsense ?

I think this is why Zweli always

prefers to be left out , where
the royal family is concerned
It really wouldn’t end well with
him and Mahlubandile in one
room
.
.
.
.
*Rain*
Thonga : girl , you got me with
so much happiness . It’s just
hard to contain
I look at them with a smile

Thonga : I am loving you with all

that I got , even your mother

I laugh

Me : like really ? It’s only been a

day , and I feel replaced

He looks at me and laughs

Thonga : I think I just got a smile
there

Me : stop with the lies

Thonga : I am not

Me : what is she smiling about ?

Thonga : there’s so many

reasons for that
Me : lies , all she knows is eat
and cry and sleep . Nothing else

I feel like I birthed a very lazy

child

I’m sure she takes after Thonga

Cause that cannot be at all

Thonga : she’s just living up to

her name , that’s all
There’s no winning

Me : I love the name your

father gave her

He smiles

Thonga : she will be spoilt

Me : Mr Ndlovu was right , she

will also be territorial
He chuckles

Thonga : it will be fine , I mean

she will not have any siblings
any time soon . I want her to
get all the love and attention ,
until she’s ready for a friend

I smile

He’s so good with the baby

Like she’s always in his arms

Even the nurses were

complaining

That she’s going to get used

sleeping in arms

But he told them , it’s not their

business to worry
Cause that is exactly where she
will sleep

Thonga : I can’t wait for you two

to get out of here

I don’t know about that

Getting out of here , where will

we go ?

I am worried
Will my father accept us , if we
go to the palace ?

Me : in a day or so , the doctor

said we’re both good . Really
there’s no reason to keep us
here

My brother called and said

they’re coming , they’re just
delayed a bit
His parents will come in the
afternoon

So it’s just been us , and he

slept here

On the chair

He said he’s not leaving us here

alone
Thonga : we should ….

The door opens

And I just tear up as I lay my

eyes on him

He just couldn’t wait to rock up

here

Like why did they even tell him ,

that Ntandokazi is born ?
They shouldn’t have told him

Dad : Mageba

He’s looking at Thonga

Thonga : Kumkani (my king)

Me : please give me my child

I say with tears streaming down
my face

He walks over and gives me the

baby

I look at my beautiful daughter

And there’s no way in hell I am

giving my child up

That will not happen

Me : please forgive me my king ,
I will not give my child to
anyone . I am forfeiting the
throne , whatever punishment
the gods bestow upon me . I will
take it , I will always avail myself
for your land and your people
so they do not perish because
of me . But I am not giving my
daughter away , you can banish
me and I will take that . Cast me
out as your child , and it’ll be
okay . I am a mother before I
am anything , and I will not have
my child resent me because I
deserted her .

My tears drop to her cheek ,

and she blinks

Me : I am sorry , I will lose it all

together just because of my
child
I hear him heave a sigh

He will just have to forgive me

on this one

There was no way to make

peace with this

If my baby grows up to be a
mixture of breeds , then it’s fine
. I will accept her as she is , and
I’ll find a way for her to fit in
I , her mother will not turn my
back against her

No matter what
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 38*
*Mahlubandile*
I have broken my child
The apple of my eye

And I don’t know how do I get

her to forgive me after this

Or for her to see me in another

light

It has been a rough 8 months

I walk closer to the bed

The pink clothes , are suiting
their owner very much

I let out a fade smile

Just pain hitting me

Me : can I hold her ?

Rain : dad please ….

She shakes her head , with
more tears streaming down her
face

Me : don’t drop your tears on

the princess like this , you’ll give
her a life of bad luck filled with
tears

She loosens her hands

I take the baby from her

And she opens her eyes ,
already chewing

And the tiny hand forms into a

fist , going into her mouth

Me : you’re a lover for food huh

?

She yawns a bit

Me : look at you , I wish I hadn’t
accepted those dowry cows
from these Zulu people . And
you would be a Mampofu

Thonga chuckles

As much as things were fucked

up and all

They did do right for my

daughter , and my family
They paid damages for her
pride

They paid damages for the baby

And months back , they came to

pay dowry for the baby to take
their surname

Me : you’re so beautiful
She’s blinking a lot , it’s like
she’s listening and hearing what
I’m saying

And it’s just gibberish to her ,

I’m sure

Me : what did you name her ?

I look at Rain , she’s wiping her

tears off
Looking so red , it breaks my
heart

Rain : her grandfather named

her Ntandokazi

Me : he ruined her

She smiles

Me : but I don’t blame him

I heave a sigh

Me : I also don’t blame how you

reacted , as soon as I walked in
here . I just hate that I’m the
cause of your tears and pain ,
and I wish I can take it back .
But I know , the past months I
have ruined a lot . And it won’t
just take a day to fix it , that’s if
I’ll even be able to fix it . Your
mother wailed , when I said I’m
coming here . And the way you
just cried right now , shows me
how much of a failure I have
been . We have been blessed ,
and this is a time we’re
supposed to be shedding tears
of joy and not weeping like this .
I didn’t come here to separate
you with the princess , I just
came here to see her that’s all

She looks at me shocked

Rain : what ?
Me : things are different I know
, and I let my fears get the
better of me . But I had some
deep searching , and I saw I was
fearing nothing . You serve your
purpose to our kingdom , and
Ngwe will definitely crown a
successor from our bloodline
when it’s time . It has always
been known , that your kids can
never rule . Thongalethu has no
duty whatsoever over Isizwe sa
MaMpofu , because he has
been chosen by the great
ancestor of Isilo to be their
royal seer there . He cannot
serve two kingdom’s , so in
your union you each serve your
purpose in your kingdoms .
Whatever your outcomes of
your offspring’s , shall be
something that’s looked into .
And I believe those before us ,
will lead us the right path
Rain : dad

It comes out as a whisper

Rain : what are you saying ?

Me : I am sorry Mampofu , for

all the pain and hurt along with
the tears I’ve brought you . It
was so not worth it , I can admit
that I was hasty . I hope one day
, you can be able to forgive me .
And I can be the father you
have always had , it pains me I
wasn’t supportive to you in your
time of need . And that’s
something you’ll always carry
with you , and remember me
with ….

Rain : no , no I don’t have to

carry that with me . And I don’t
have to always remember you
in that manner , because I
understood and I shared your
fears . But I oppressed them ,
and just chose to be a mother .
You were not unnecessary at all

I let out a smile

Rain : it takes a true father to

admit when he’s wrong , and to
apologize . Now I can safely say
, my smart father is back

She lets out a slight laugh

Me : no one is forfeiting the
throne , you will continue to
carry your duties until Ngwe
relives you of them . The
princess will stay at home , with
her people . It will pain me
when those Zulu’s come to pick
her

Rain : daddy he’s here

I shake my head

Me : I don’t care

And he chuckles behind me

Rain : wow ! Do you have a

name for us ?

Me : me ?

She nods
Rain : we wanted the
grandfathers to name

Me : I see what you’re doing ,

now we cannot help but just
love her

We laugh

Me : that Zulu man ruined her

with his eyes
Rain : I love those eyes , do not
be mean

I chuckle

These eyes are cute

But no one must ever hear me

say that

Especially that Zulu man

Me : Iyana

Rain : nton ? (What)

Me : that’s her name

Rain : nton enayo tata ? (What’s

raining dad)

Thonga : Iyana imvula

nentsikelelo zayo (a rain of
blessings) , that’s what the
name means . It’s beautiful ,
and powerful too

Now she smiles

I think I might just end up liking

this boy

Nkosiyabo would be proud of

the man he has become and
grown to be
Its not like I hated him

I just didn’t like the fact that he

took my daughter

No father is ever happy to see

her baby grow up

And making choices in life ,

specially where a man is
concerned
Me : come see me at the palace
when you get some time

The eye Rain gives me

But she can relax

Thonga : I will do that

I nod
.
.
.
.
*Thongalethu*
Mom : what ?

I chuckle

It’s like she doesn’t believe me

Me : he got there , and Rain was

just a mess . And cried , told
him he can keep his throne .
She will take whatever
punishment is given , but she’s
not giving up her child

Mom : so that got him to

change his mind ?

I shake my head no

Me : no , I think he came with

the intention to fix and mend
things . He didn’t come to
separate them

Mom : wow , to whatever that

happened and changed his
mind

Me : he’s a father at the end of

the day , still doesn’t excuse
what he did . But it’s all over
and done now , I think he’s okay
and Rain is glad to have her
father back . It sunk in that I
have no desire for his kingdom ,
and also that I have no duty
there

Mom : I don’t understand this

Me : my duty is at Isilo ma , to
serve there as one of their own
. Until time comes , and Isilo can
posses his own . Then I can
continue with Mageba ,
wherever this life may lead us
Mom : but …what happens if
you marry Rain ?

I chuckle

Me : I will be her husband , but

not king

Mom : how ?

She asks confused

Me : I will be the queens
husband , that’s that

She laughs

Mom : I feel like you two are

just so complicated

Me : complications starts with

people trying to understand us
Mom : I am people ?

I laugh

Mom : some child that you are

I look at my wrist watch

Me : I have to go to the palace ,

the king asked to see me . So I
have to get going
The siblings and queen are in
there

My mom just arrived , and she’s

with Zweli

I won’t even ask where my

father is

I know he will probably come on

his own
The doctor said he’s discharging
Rain and my baby tomorrow

Mom : he better not harm you

Zweli : just give me a call

I get up with a frown

Me : I honestly feel like you

have been itching for a criminal
record , like just stay away from
that man . Call you for what ?
You just want war with him

He laughs

I walk away shaking my head

Zweli has never had anything

nice to say about the king

I think he’s a bitter man

Bests me how he refused my
mother a divorce

And opted for an open marriage

Especially with my father , a

man that he knows

Very awkward

Voice : Zulu wait ….

I turn back as I get to the
parking lot

And it’s Zitha jogging to me

Me : what’s wrong ?

He laughs

Zitha : you’re always on the

edge , nothing is wrong . Where
are you going ?
Me : to your father

He frowns

I guess he’s another Zweli right

now

Zitha : how brave are you ?

Me : mxm , where are you going

?.
Zitha : home , thought maybe
you can give me a lift . If you’re
going anywhere that side

Me : leaving so soon ?

Zitha : like mom and her kids

are just fussing over Iyana , we
other beings don’t exist . And I
was bearing gifts today , I didn’t
come to stay . There’s work at
home , Kumkani has people
working like crazy . Turning the
west chamber into a nursery , I
swear seeing that baby got to
him

I laugh

Me : get in the car , let’s go .

Most definitely , you’ll protect
me against your father
Zitha : are you mocking me ?
You’re the animals , so it’s tiger
vs Jaglion . Brother man , I am a
mere human being

We laugh as we get into the car

He’s the third born , and older

than me with 5 years

But he doesn’t treat me like a

minor to him
We get along very fine
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 39*
*Thongalethu*
This man knows how to be a
slave driver

Like it’s in him

And I thought maybe he told
me to come here for a talk or
something

But no !

He gets me to work on this

nursery thing

As if I asked to work on it

It’s for his granddaughter

Hard manual labour is just not
for me

Like , not at all

This might be for my child , yes

But like why do I have to do it ?

He said I made that child ,

surely I can sweat for her
Honestly , I think Grandfather
fever has gotten into him

But he shouldn’t think we all

have his fever

My phone rings , I head out

answering

Rain : baby are you okay ?

Me : yes

I chuckle

Me : no

Rain : what ….why ? What

happened ?

I sigh
Me : your father has me
working here

Rain : working on what ?

Me : something baby , are you

two okay ? I’ll come back when I
leave here

Rain : we’re okay , my family

just left . She’s with your
mother , I want to take a
shower quickly before she starts
with her crying

Me : okay , let me get back to

work . I love you

Rain : we love you

She laughs dropping the call

I would rather be with them ,

than being here
But let me go man up

Zitha : I thought you ran away

I chuckle

No one is safe , we’re all feeling

the heat

Me : no , I was talking to Rain

Zitha : Rain is going to be
crowned in a few days

Me : what ?

Zitha : me and my big mouth ,

but that’s what Kumkani called
you here for . Don’t go telling
him I told you now

I am sure Rain doesn’t know

about this
She would have told me

Zitha : she’s still allowed her life

you know ? She can still go back
to Joburg , and sturdy . Of
course after Iyana has turned 6
months

Me : mhm , but is there a

reason why she’s being
crowned now ?
Zitha : it’s just time , Ngwe
confirmed it with Jongikhaya
and Kumkani . She doesn’t
know , but if really it’s time . On
the day she gets crowned , she
will know what’s happening .
And she will be ready

Me : that’s creepy

He laughs
Zitha : your whole situation is
creepy , how are you fine to be
with a queen yet you can’t be
king ? I mean you’re Isilo after
all

Me : being Isilo doesn’t make

me blue blood , and it doesn’t
give me a duty here . My duty is
right back at Isilo
Zitha : I feel like the rest of us ,
just go insane wrecking our
brains . While the two of you ,
are just chilled

Me : because we know and

understand this , no one knows
our journey better than we do

Zitha : a match made

underground
Like what the fuck ?

He seals that with a laugh

.
.
.
.
*Rain*
I am so happy

Like I cannot believe that my

father did this
And all in one day

Well , he had others working

like slaves to make it happen

But I wasn’t even really thinking

of having a nursery here

I just figured sisters and I will

share my chamber
But now , she has her own
personal space

And it’s really beautiful

Like they have outdone

themselves

Now it makes sense why

Thonga , was so tired when he
got back yesterday
Me : I think she’s going to love it
in here

Dad : yeah

I turn and look at him

Me : I missed this , like I missed

us

He smiles
Dad : old age

We laugh

Dad : I am sorry , come here

I walk to him and we hug

Me : thank you for giving us a

chance , I know it wasn’t easy . I
never hated you
This must have not been easy to
him

But I am glad that he’s willing to

just let things be

And as time goes on , we will

see what happens

And if there’s a need to worry

about Ntandokazi
But for now , she’s only been a
baby existing for three days

Surely we can give her a break

.
.
.
.
*Winnie*
Venus : babe , are you okay ?

Me : I couldn’t be better , I’ll

see you later
I lean over and peck his cheek

Me : I will see you later babe

Venus : bye

Me : just bye ?

I ask with a slight laugh

Venus : can you tell me that

we’re okay really ?
Me : we’re okay baby , I
promise you . I know I’ve been a
bit distant since I got back home
, it’s just Varsity work . Has
nothing to do with us

He smiles

Venus : okay , I love you

Me : I’ll see you later

I lean over for a kiss and get out
of the car

Bumping into Lona at the gate

Me : hey

Lona : you and this mystery

man seem to be going far

I laugh
Lona : so , even after all these
months . You still don’t want me
to know him ?

I’ve had enough of her

judgement with Thonga

I don’t need it with Venus too

He has a child , and I don’t

She will use that

He has money , and I don’t

Of course that won’t sit well

with her either

She’s just a lot , and her

judgement is too much

Me : no
Lona : so he’s keeping you a
secret , like be careful friend

See what I mean ?

Who said Venus is keeping me a

secret ?

Me : you don’t even know him

like that

Lona : I’m just saying that ….

Me : give it up okay ? I am not
discussing my relationship with
you

I pass her entering campus

I am spending the week at

Venu’s place

So he’s driving me
I’m really scared to drive his
cars

Knowing who he is , it’s just a

threat on its own

I don’t want to get hurt driving

his car

Just as a liability
.
.
.
.
*INSERT 40*
*Rain*
Waking up to this day

With ran poring like there’s no

tomorrow

I wish I had gotten a sign of

some sort
Maybe a slight hint

That today is the day , and yes

it’s happening

I wasn’t so ready for this , nor

am I even prepared

I don’t even think it would

happen so soon
But Ngwe was out , he was
ready and prepared

I cried so much

It was just a sight I did not

anticipate to see

Me taking the throne and my

father stepping down

My heart went out to that man

For all that he has done for this
kingdom

All of his years , from a teenager

And now he’s no longer king to

Isizwe sa MaMpofu

I don’t know now what life will

hold for him
I’m about to embark now , on
this journey

With the support that was just

here today

From the people , and well the

neighbouring kingdoms

Even Thongalethu’s people

from Isilo came
I believe there will be peace
here

And we will definitely meet

each other half way

And we will make this work

With our duties and all

Not neglecting the gifts we have

been blessed with
I walk in the nursery chamber

And he’s standing there by the

window , holding her

I am drenched , just walking

from the throne room to this
room

It is said that it will rain , until

Ngwe and the gods are pleased
Me : hi

He turns and looks at me

Thonga : we’re here looking at

the rain , and you’re out there
playing in rain . You’re being
strange

I laugh
Me : help me with a towel so I
can take this dress off , it’s
heavy cause it’s wet

He walks over and hands me a

towel

I take my dress off , and warp

the towel on me

Me : it’s raining crazy

We walk over to stand by the
window

Ntandokazi is wide awake

No wonder her father is in here

with her

Thonga : the significance of it ,

also living up to someone else’s
name
We laugh

Thonga : the gods have agreed

Me : don’t start

He squints his eyes

Me : please no …don’t

Thonga : all hail the rain queen

I give him one bored look , he
burst out laughing

I end up laughing because what

the hell ?

Me : you bore me

Thonga : I love you still

Me : I love you
I hold on his arm , laying my
head on his shoulder

Me : I am grateful to Mageba
and Isilo for you

He holds my waist with his one

hand

He places a kiss on top of my

head
My lips just involuntary curve
into a smile
.
.
.
.
*THE END*