Chapter Theme The Power of Culture and Language i The Example Essay Goals Writing To select examples to support a thesis and use these examples to write an essay To understand how extended examples and numerous examples can effectively support a thesis statement To learn how to avoid hasty generalizations To use transitions between paragraphs To use repetition of key words and phrases to increase coherence Reading To learn about and discuss examples of the power of culture and language in our lives To identify examples in an essay and determine how they support a thesis Grammar To review gerunds and infinitves and noun clauses 127Writing Chapter @ The Example Essay 137 The way you develop your topic depends on what the topic is and on what you Want to say. Let us suppose, for example, that you are asked to write about the difficulties of being a foreign student. How could you develop this topic? You would probably want to develop it with examples that illustrate the difficulties Could you adequately cover this topic in a single paragraph? Probably not. The topic is simply too broad. You will need to write a longer essay to cover this topic adequately. How to ‘organize and develop the examples for such a topic in the multiparagraph essay is the focus of this chapter. Number of Examples Just how many examples you use in an example essay depends on the topic. Some topics require numerous examples, whereas others can be effectively developed With three or four extended examples (illustrations), For instance, the thesis statement “San Francisco has some of the most unusual sights in California” does not commit the writer to giving numerous examples; afterall, the claim is only that this city has “some” unusual sights. Therefore, three or four extended ‘examples should suffice. As you read the following essay about a student's first Year in the United States, determine if the writer provides enough examples. Americans Are Friendly to Strangers | came to the United States one year ago and | had no idea about life in the United States and American traditions, except that life was complicated and people are strange. At the time | arrived at J. Ken- nedy airport, | felt very happy because | am fond of traveling around the world. Coming to America had been one of my dreams, so | could {go to Jamaica or any island in the Caribbean. A few minutes later, however, | felt afraid. | asked myself why | had come to this strange world and what | was doing here. The reason for that was what | remembered my friends in Saudi Arabia saying about Americans and how they treat strangers, After | attended college, however, | discov- ered the opposite of what | had expected. Even though American social relations are complex, hard to form, and hard to maintain, 1! managed to bridge the gap, and | was able to have close friendships with some Americans. For example, the first semester| attended college, | became friends with one of the American Used to attend math class with me, We used to study. to parties together, and he used to help me a lot with. 138, Unit wo: The Essay her universi ee ence, tne 1 though Re ar am my experience! pare on al and long, Slang o p with each Ot er erally ver hen | sit with Americans my English, Ever ways keep in touct to understand periods are uncomfort tion with tl able t0 sing about the weather, spor, start a conversation w ym BY om. | think conversations mage or about teachers’ skills a friendly atmosphere among Pes me that | had the wrong ide, Te second example that POV? ang | drove across the count abort americans was when MY WEE Tig my friends that my ite pow ew orieans to San DIEGO WIT. ctates and if they hoe and | were going to drive across ES eeousto five across Ammen, tothey could join us. they 8K * mick arivers or get robbed.” Hoy, ney eget killed by one of ne a wanted to find ever, we didn't pay attention to them becal ee ncers out what America is really ike and how people trea! Sed ‘on theranay trommsunvanemneieme daa our car ere cause it ran out of fuel. We got out of the car and waited for anyone t give us a ride. Ten minutes later truck driver pulled off the road. | gpproached him carefully and | asked hit Could you please give us shite. elevdareseactetenmvensteo"° why. | said, “Our car ran out of gas and we have to get some.” He said, “The nearest station is thirty-five miles away and you might not find anyone who can drive you back to your car." Then he came up with a solution to our problem tre towed our car to the nearest station. When we reached it, | took a fifty dollar bill from my pocket and handed itto him, but he wouldn't accept it, He told me that he helped me because we needed help. In general, Americans are friendly to strangers. From my exper ‘son who treats people well will put them in a position ats them badly ence, a pe where they have to respect him in return, but if he tre: they will treat him in the same way. Human beings are born with 2 good nature and they will not behave badly unless they are forced to. | think a person should judge people by dealing with them, not by listening to his friends. —Nader Alyousha EXERCISE 7-5 Ona separate sheet of paper, answer the following questions abo" the preceding essay. 1. What is the thesis statement? What is the central idea? 2. How many examples does the writer give? : i Sagan) give? Are the examples explained 3, Are there enough examples? = dj2 ay 199 Ess ,e Example Chapter @ 7 £* Ate the examples relevant 6. He Paragraphs coherent and unified? How are the paragraphs ongenioed AN outline of Nader Alyousha’s essay might look like this Thesis Statement Americans are friendly to strangers 1. Twas able t aibaar One 10 have close friendships with some Am oe *: One example i a student in my math class during my frst semestel 1. We studied together 2. We went to parties together He helped me y with my English. 4. We still keep in touch. B. T begin friendships by starting a conversation about 1. The weather, 2. Sports, 3. Teachers? skills in the classroom, I. Thad the ‘wrong idea about Americans. A. An example is our trip across the country 1. My friends said it was dangerous. 2. When we ran out of gas, a. He towed our car, b. He wouldn't accept any money. a stranger helped us. Conclusion: People will treat you wel if you treat them well. Some topics require numerous exam suppose the thesis statement is “Our three extended examples of streets i ples for adequate development. For instance, city streets are in terrible condition.” Would in bad condition be sufficient to develop this thesis statement? Probably not. Asserting that all—or even most-—of the city streets are in terrible condition based on only three or four examples would rather unwise; after all city has many stretsand, inthis cases mone of ee may in fact be in good condition. A generalization suchas “Our city steete in terible condition” based on a insufcient numberof examples ean hasty generalization in other words tis a generalization made too hastily before examining enough evidence. Making such a generalization without giving sage cient examples for support sacrices credibility withthe reader In shone shang statements tht stat imply “mos” or “al” may ned numerous examples for support; thesis statements that are more moderate, stating or implying sete erie canoCcn\berunrorsaeettteren ee more developed, , examples.140 Unit Two The Essay Choice of Examples ve member” of a class OF category, the exam, Since an example isa “representaiiv® Bid be representative examples, «, is statemen ; ay you use to develop the thesis state pettieans that you were js, Let’s says for Wtitin ples that fairly support the thesis. Le y sed in planning ty i 1 eae eg found in mail-order catalOg®y lous. eo you ees essay about idiculous. So, you migh, : many items that were ridict YOU might i you noticed that there were offered in mail-order ctlyy i 4 items arrived at the thess statement, “Many ems ccamples only it just superfluous, absurd trifles.” If you Us ° of one type, such as toys, clearly the examples ore et ie _ representative of most of the items ofered in these cats 08% 1 Pe fr ang effective, the examples should be from a f areas. Stucy WING essa, to determine if the examples are sufficien! range of ¢ in number and ifthey are fairly choy’ Useless Trifles For many years, people living in remote areas relied on the Sears or Montgomery Ward's catalogs to purchase the necessities of l'fe. These “wish books," as they were often called, helped people to improve the quality of their lives. Nowadays, nearly every household in the country receives a barrage of various catalogs selling everything from electric golf carts to padded coat hangers. The descriptions of these items suggest that they, too, will help improve the quality of our lives by providing convenience, comfort, and/or shortcuts to improve our appearance. But so often, these items are just superfluous, absurd trifles. Whoever does the cooking has a great deal of work to do, and anything to ease that workload is certainly appreciated by any home- maker. Unfortunately, some of these clever items that claim to save time might actually end up making us waste time. Take, for example, devices to save time cutting. A specially designed cutter will slice six pieces of pie at the same time, each piece the same size. Another device cuts an apple in thin slices and removes the core alll in one shot. Still another removes the corn from the cob, easily and quickly. Although these devices may save time in the actual cutting, just think of how much time the person lost trying to find the device in the first place and then cleaning it up afterward! The same problem applies to a hand-sized electric drink mixer. It might save the host or hostess some muscle, but not aggravation when he or she finds the batteries are dead and there are none in the house. Certainly anyone would also appreciate items that make our livesChapter @ The Example Essay 141 More comfortable, but some of the items for the bathroom border on the absurd. For about $8 you can buy an inflatable pillow to rest against in the bathtub. It's held secure by suction cups.) An inch-thick foam rubber pad will cushion you from the hard bottom of the tub 2 you bathe. OF course, if it gets mildew on it, it might be better located in the trash can. Finally, you can sit in comfort on the toilet ©n 2 plush toilet seat cover and listen to music from a radio built into @ toilet paper container. Comfort and convenience are carried to extremes in the area of Personal care, Without any real effort at all, or so the ads in these Catalogs claim, you can go to bed and wake up feeling and looking better. After taking special pills to melt away excess pounds, you can crawl into your bed and let it massage you all night long. (A curious electric device makes the bed vibrate.) In addition, you can rest your head on a wedge-shaped pillow that is supposed to help you sleep better. To protect your hairstyle while you sleep, you can don a special cap. To keep your chin from sagging, you can wrap a band around your face, under your chin, and up over the front part of your head. Finally, to prevent your eyes from getting puffy, all you need to do is slip on a water-filled face mask. Of course, if you wake up to find your mate gone, do not be surprised! All of these items, whether they are designed to help us in the kitchen, comfort us in the bathroom, or improve the way we look and feel, are for the most part unnecessary. Rather than improve the quality of our lives, such items detract from it by wasting our time and money and cluttering up our cupboards and closets. And cluttering up our coffee tables and end tables are those stacks of catalogs offering more such useless trifles. EXERCISE7+6 Ona separate sheet of paper, answer the following questions about the preceding essay: 1. What is the thesis statement? The central idea? 2. What are the topic sentences? The controlling ideas? 3. Does each of the paragraphs develop an aspect of the thesis statement? 4, Are there enough examples in the essay? Are the examples representative? 5. What is the principle of organization of the paragraphs? Why, for example, does the writer discuss items for personal care last? 6. Is the conclusion logical? 7. Make an outline of this essay.Chapter @ The Example Essay 143 EXERCISE 78 Writing Asignnent fore you begin planning techniques you le gathering idea ne of the following writing topics. Be- use one of the prewriting Choose and drafting your essa cd in Chapter 1 to generate ideas about your topic. After focus on a controlling idea and thesis statement. Next, choose “xamples to support your thesis. Make a brief plan for the essay. Write the essay ar 1. Review “view the essay “Americans Are Friendly to Strangers” on pages 137-138. Write an essay about the Americans you encountered when you first came to this country. Were they friendly or not? Give examples to support your thesis : On page 139 is a suggested thesis, “Our city streets are in terrible condition. Using this as your thesis, write an essay where you live. If y yout the streets in the ‘ou think something else needs improvement, write a Biving examples to illustrate your thesis. You could choose the food in cafeteria, the buildings on campus, or even some aspect or neighborhood or your country. item in your Do you or your family get mail-order catalogs? Write an essay abou items in these catalogs that you find particularly interesting. Review the essay ‘on pages 140-141. Composition Skills _ Coherence Organization of Examples The examples and details in an expository paragraph can be organized according to time, familiarity, and importance. In an example essay, the principle of organiza- tion is essentially the same. For example, the author of the essay about friendly Americans chose to organize his examples according to both time and importance, whereas the writer of “Useless Trifles” chose to begin with the least interesting examples and end with the most interesting ones—those that are personal. Transitions Between Paragraphs Developmental paragraphs in the example essay must be connected so that they flow smoothly. Just because a paragraph introduces an additional aspect of the topic does not mean that the shift from one topic to the next should be abrupt; indeed, the shift should be smooth so that the reader understands clearly the progression of thought, Remember, just as a paragraph is incoherent if the sen- tences can be switched around without significant change in meaning, an essay is incoherent if the paragraphs can be switched around without significant change. ‘There are two ways to connect the paragraphs in an essay: (1) with transitional expressions and (2) with the repetition of key words and phrases.ns to Introduce peas rst developmental paragrap! Pe ¢ ample that can be used to introduce the first examp of an example essay, there are sever) Ph or group of examples, ay, Take, for example, this topic. ae Mea ‘ighbor. One example of a person who is kind is my neighde Wvement is py One area of town where there are examples of improvement is upyoy, First, consider the case of Mr. Martinez. To begin (To begin with), consider my roommate. In the second developmental paragraph, the examples can be introduce ing variety of ways: Another example of a good teacher is Mrs. Hahn. An additional example is Mr. Ming. Second, consider Mr. Jones. Next, consider Ms. In the last developmental Evans. Paragraph, you can use the same type of transition above, but in an example paragraph that introduces the most important urn significant example, Paragraph: You should indicate its importance in the beginning of te Still another example of a good teacher is Ms, Lin, ‘Third, consider Main Street, Finally, there is the problem of air pollution. The most important ‘The most significant (interesting) Angeles. To see how these types of transition the following essay. it example of a helpful person is my advisor. example of air pollution is provided by 10s s can be used to connect paragraphs, stud! lial