A court of Gwynriel One-Shots

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/31212899.

Rating: Mature
Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: F/M
Fandom: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Relationship: Azriel/Gwyneth Berdara
Character: Azriel (ACoTaR), Gwyneth Berdara, Nesta Archeron, Cassian
(ACoTaR), Feyre Archeron, Rhysand (ACoTaR), Emerie (ACoTaR),
Morrigan (ACoTaR), Lucien Vanserra, Tamlin (ACoTaR), Elain
Archeron, Amren (ACoTaR)
Additional Tags: Love, Gwynriel, soft, playful, Competitive, Drama, Jealousy, Fluff,
protective azriel, Chill Gwyn, Azriel POV, Gwyn POV, Angst, Possible
smut
Language: English
Collections: ACOTARs
Stats: Published: 2021-05-10 Updated: 2022-07-31 Chapters: 21/? Words:
46383

A court of Gwynriel One-Shots

by rosiesarerosiepink

Summary

A series of Gwynriel one-shots. Mostly fluff, but there will be serious/angst/smut as well.

Notes

Hello, everyone! This is my first story for this fandom, and I am very excited. This is 98% a
Gwynriel fic, because I just LOVE them. Therefore, if you don't ship them, then I don't
recommend reading this. However, while I have many ideas, they are not enough to form
one fanfic, so I'll stick with one-shots.
Please excuse any existing mistakes; I will try to correct them all, but sometimes my
European brain can fail me haha.

This first one-shot is inspired by an ADORABLE fan-art by elizianna.the.one on Instagram

with Azriel trying to teach his child how to fly (the child had freckles, blue eyes and red
hair SO it's obvious who the mom is haha.).
 Flying lessons

Gwyn hummed softly as she arranged the books left on the top shelf. It was a habit she still had
from her time living in the library; every week, Gwyn found herself rearranging the books she and
Azriel owned, each time finding a different way - one week alphabetically, the other by colour and
so on.

A small smile appeared on Gwyn's face at the thought of her times in the library. It's been years
since Gwyn left that place, and she still found herself somehow missing it. She missed the other
priestesses - especially Clotho; hell, she even missed Merrill. The horrible woman who made
Gwyn's life a nightmare for years...she was actually nice to Gwyneth in the end. She wasn't sure
what made Merrill change, yet the red-headed could not forget the look on Merrill's face as she was
getting ready to leave the library. She seemed touched - she even hugged Gwyn, which was
unusual for her. Gwyn was not the only one surprised, as even Clotho seemed taken aback by that
gesture.

Gwyn took a step back from the bookshelf and looked over the books, smiling, proud of herself.
This week, she has chosen to arrange them based on their size. It was more difficult than she had
imagined, but definitely had a satisfying result. Gwyn chuckled at the thought Azriel's exasperated
face at the sight of the rearranged bookshelf.

Azriel. Her friend. Her mate.

When he saved her 20 years ago, she would have never imagined he'd ever be her friend, let alone
her mate. Gwyneth still had moments when she found herself not believing what had happened in
her life. Things started slow between them; it took them a while to become friends for real - but
when it happened, they were pretty much inseparable. Azriel would find excuses to join her in the
library - of course without disturbing the other priestesses and making sure he was not making
them feel uncomfortable; they'd meet almost every night for training - but, in reality, they'd just
talk and make fun of how Nesta had Cassian wrapped around her pinky.

Gwyn got to meet a side of Azriel he had never shown before - a goofy, fun one. It was not hard for
her to fall in love with him, even though this terrified her. But the shadowsinger has always let
Gwyn decide. Everything that happened between them was pretty much dictated by how Gwyneth
felt. She was the one to initiate their first kiss, to ask Azriel to try being more than friends. The
woman knew she was blessed to have a man as patient and loving as Azriel.

However, they had their downs in their relationship.

When their mating bond snapped, it was...intense. It was probably the hardest moment in their
relationship, because both Gwyn and Azriel were...scared, terrified. So they parted ways for some
time, both trying to figure out what they wanted, if they were ready to accept it - and Mother, how
hard it was to stay away for months from each other, to meet almost every day, yet avoid the other.
In the end, it was Gwyn who decided they should both work on their problems together, to get over
them as a couple and after that worry about the bond. After all, they were not forced to accept it
immediately. And it worked. Sure, it took them 4 years to finally decide on accepting it, but it was
worth it.

While their relationship definitely evolved slower than their friends' relationships, Gwyn wouldn't
change a thing about it - and she knew Azriel wouldn't, either.

"No, no, NO! Don't go that far!"

Gwyn walked outside their house and leaned against the door frame. The image in front of her
melted her heart - Azriel in the middle of their backyard, dozens of pillows around him. His
shadows were following the petite figure in the air as his muscled arm was stretched so that his
fingers were always touching the flying body.

The red-headed chuckled at the look on her mate's face - worry, fear, exasperation. "Come on,
Azriel, let him go around. Nothing's going to happen to him."

Only when Gwyn spoke did the shadowsinger notice her. He glanced at her, a small frown on his
handsome face. "And risk getting our son hurt?" The man snorted, shaking his head as if the
thought was out of the question.

Their son. Dorian. At three years old, he resembled both of his parents quite well. His hair, red like
his mom's and all messy like his father's. Teal eyes that were a copy of Gwyn's. His skin was
darker than Gwyn's, yet lighter than Azriel's. He was quite tall for a child his age, but it was
nothing abnormal given both Gwyn's and Azriel's heights. His wings were growing more and more
as time passed, which forced Azriel to teach him how to fly, even though he did not want to - at
least not at this age. They've been doing it for a couple of weeks now, and Dorian already got the
hang of it. Sure, he would still fall and not fly too high - and this was also because Azriel would
never let it happen; he was still too young. Yet the little boy was making progress each day, which
filled their parents with pride - despite Azriel's overprotective behaviour.

"Oh, Cauldron." Gwyn laughed, amused. She watched their son and how his wings flapped around.
He was giggling and clearly trying to fly away from Azriel - only that his father would not allow it.
"Azriel, nothing is going to happen to Dorian." She started as she made her way to her boys. She
sat on one of the pillows next to Azriel, placing her hand on his knee.

"Mommy, look, I am flying!" Their 3-year-old son exclaimed, twirling in the air a bit. Azriel
tensed and tried to reach for Dorian, yet Gwyn tightened her grip on his knee.

"Yes, baby, you are!" Gwyneth smiled, leaning her head against Azriel's shoulder, feeling just how
tense he was. "Azriel, love, calm down. The worst that can happen is him falling on the grass -
which would result in him getting a scratch or two." His shadows came around Gwyn and brushed
her skin in a soft, loving way like they usually did.

Azriel did not answer his mate, too focused on watching Dorian. Gwyneth sighed and grabbed his
outstretched hand, placing it in her lap. "Let him fly away a bit. If something happens, you can
jump after him. Plus, your shadows never leave his side, so he is protected." Gwyn smiled as
Azriel turned his face to look at her. His eyebrows were slightly raised, and his eyes widened. The
woman could not help but laugh. Mother, he was terrified. "I cannot believe the man that threw
Feyre off of a cliff to teach her how to fly is scared to let his son fly around a bit, in the garden,
with dozens of pillows around!"

His lips parted a bit, and he tilted his head to the side. "I hope you did not just compare me
teaching a grown woman how to fly to me teaching an infant!" Azriel frowned. Gwyn rolled her
eyes and placed her hand on his face. She leaned closer and pecked his lips, lovingly.

"Details." She smirked and looked at her side, her smile widening. "Look, he is perfectly capable
of flying by himself!" She pointed to Dorian, who was flying slightly higher around their backyard.

"Not so high!" Azriel called out and Gwyn groaned, her head falling back.

Dorian did not listen to his father and kept flying at the height he wanted to. His smile grew bigger,
the wind ruffling his thick, copper hair. Azriel sighed and shook his head. "Yep, he's your son."
Azriel leaned back on the pillows. "Just as stubborn as you, and finds most things amusing when he
should not."

"Good, because at least he took after the fun parent." Gwyn grinned. Azriel poked her side and
rolled his eyes. "Well, grumpy man, to make you feel better - I am sure our daughter will be just as
serious as you." She winked, looking down at Azriel. She traced his strong jawline with her slender
finger.

His eyebrows shot up, "Daughter? Are you-"

Gwyn laughed, shaking her head. "No. Not yet, at least."

"Are you hitting on me, Berdara?" Azriel teased. Before she could answer, they heard a small noise
from their side. They both looked over at their son who was struggling to stay in the air because of
the wind. Azriel started to get up, preparing to remind Dorian how to land, but it was too late.

The child yelped as he fell on the ground face first. Azriel's shadows started frantically circling the
child and Azriel cursed, loudly. Gwyn watched their son, slightly worried, but it washed away as
she heard Dorian's laughter. Azriel knelt next to Dorian and pulled him up. His scared hands went
over Dorian's face, looking after any injuries.

Dorian kept laughing loudly, soon being joined by his mother. "That was fun! I want again!" The
child clapped his hands, about to start flying again, but the hands on his sides stopped him from
moving.

"Oh, hell no, young man. Enough amusement for today." Azriel murmured as he picked up Dorian
in his arms. The child whined and pouted.

Gwyn rolled her eyes as she watched her mate walk back to the pillows with Dorian. The child had
his little hands over his chest, his pout not fading. It was hard for Azriel to resist this pout - both
Gwyn and Dorian knew it. But in this situation, Gwyn was certain Azriel would not give in. "Come
to mommy." She reached for their son and kissed his chubby cheek. His pout faded as he wrapped
his arms around his mom's neck, cuddling against her chest.

"Sure, go cuddle mommy when I don't do what you want." Azriel puffed as he watched them,
although his loving smile gave away how he really felt.

Gwyneth grinned. "He cuddles me because I am the awesome parent. Isn't that right, my little
warrior?" Gwyn raised Dorian slightly above her. The boy chuckled and flapped his wings a bit.
The woman smiled as she held him.

Azriel squinted his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "I know what you are thinking,
Berdara. And-"

"Oops," Gwyn cut him off as her hands moved away from Dorian's body to let him fly around. She
looked at Azriel and gave him her most innocent look while the male looked defeated.

He groaned, exasperated. "You are impossible." He murmured as he leaned his head in her lap.

Gwyn chuckled, her fingers going through his raven hair. "But you love me." She grinned as he
rolled his eyes.

"Unfortunately," Azriel murmured. He laughed as his mate playfully slapped his chest. They both
sat in silence, watching Dorian fly, until Azriel decided to break it,
"So, about that second child - would you like to try for it tonight?"
 Facial masks and first kisses
Chapter Summary

Azriel and Gwyn spent a self-care evening together. However, the teal-eyed beauty
had more in mind than just skin care masks for Azriel. On top of that, two unexpected
guests join them - one of them also joining the simp club with Azriel.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Azriel.

The spymaster of the Night Court. One of the most powerful men, so powerful that he needed not
one, not two, but seven siphons to contain his powers. Feared by many in Prythian; known for his
cruel ways of treating enemies, for not sparing anyone that had ill intentions.

So how in the hell did the fearsome Azriel end up shirtless, on a fluffy carpet, his hair held back by
a pink hairband, with Mother-knows what green liquid being spread all over his face? Well, he did
know how he ended up there.

His hazel eyes looked all over the young priestess's face, taking in her slightly furrowed eyebrows
as she focused on not missing any spot on his skin; her own face was covered in the same green,
sticky liquid, her coppery hair pulled in a high bun. His shadows swirled all over Gwyneth,
wrapping around her slim wrists and arms, going over her legs to brush her skin; they were very
fond of Gwyneth and barely listened to Azriel trying to hold them back when they were with
Gwyn. She never minded them; in fact, Gwyn liked them just as much. They made her feel safe.

Azriel couldn't help but smile at the image, only earning a small glare from the woman. "Stop
moving your face so much!" Gwyneth murmured as she finished applying the mask to his forehead
and pulled away. Azriel cringed a bit as he felt some parts were already drying. Definitely not the
best feeling. His eyes followed Gwyn as she got up and walked over to the desk. Suddenly, a plate
with some cut cucumbers appeared. "Thanks," She said to the house and turned to him.

Azriel frowned a bit as she sat in front of him and grabbed a cucumber slice, "Lay back." Gwyn
said with a grin.

"Is that really necessary?" The man murmured, yet he did as the priestess asked him.

At this point, Azriel was very well aware that he was, as Cassian would call it, a simp. He could
not refuse anything Gwyn asked him to do with her. If she wanted them to read together, they'd
read together. Watch the stars together? Make friendship bracelets - even though he was terrible at
that? He'd do all of it. Hell, he would even dress up in a gown if she asked him to. He never
considered himself the romantic type; Azriel never thought there'd ever be a woman to make him
feel like this, to have him pretty much wrapped around her finger - yet Gwyn was that female.

They were not mates, at least not yet. But, surprisingly, Azriel did not care about this that much.
Until he really got to know Gwyn, he was desperate to have what his brothers had - a mate. He
thought his happiness depended on finding his mate. But the beautiful priestess proved him he was
wrong all this time. He truly, deeply loved Gwyn; sure, a part of him still hoped their mating bond
would snap eventually, but if the Cauldron did not want to make them mates, Azriel would not
mind; because he knew Gwyn was the one for him, and he was happy to live like this, unmated, as
long as it meant being with Gwyn for the rest of his days.

Their relationship was extremely innocent, compared to what Azriel was used to in the past - well,
in all honesty, he never truly had a romantic relationship; he had hookups. But still, they were not
doing very much. They haven't even had a proper kiss in the 10 months they've been together,
because Gwyn was not ready yet. She was comfortable around him and that was obvious; she'd hug
him, wear his shirts, kiss him on the cheek or forehead - and let him do the same. But she was still
hesitant when it came to kisses on the lips. Yet Azriel did not rush Gwyn. He wanted everything to
happen at the pace Gwyn decided. And if she wanted to wait years to kiss him on the lips, he'd
wait for her.

Gwyn chuckled and rolled her eyes. "Yes, they'll help with the bags under your eyes." The woman
placed a slice over one eye, then the other. Azriel hissed at the feeling of the cold cucumbers over
his eyelids but did not protest. If only Rhysand or Cassian had seen him like that...

"Remind me again what does this mask do?" Azriel asked, placing his hands over his abdomen.

He heard Gwyneth hum softly. "Anti-aging." She answered, casually. Azriel's eyebrows raised and,
before he could say anything, he heard Gwyn's groan. "Don't move your face so much!"

"Anti-aging?" He repeated, "Do you think I need an anti-aging mask, Berdara?"

Gwyn's laughter filled the room and Azriel fought the little smile, trying to keep the serious face -
well, as serious as he could look with a face mask on and cucumbers over his eyes. "I may have
spotted a wrinkle or two on you, Az."

Azriel's lips parted. Mother, this woman really knew how to surprise him. "Wrinkles?" He slightly
scrunched his nose, not listening to Gwyn's command not to move his face too much.

"Well, that's normal to happen at over 500 years old, right?" Gwyn teased, the amusement in her
voice clear. Azriel placed a hand over his chest in a fake-hurt manner. "If it makes you feel better,"
Gwyn started, and he felt her head on his chest. "you don't look a day over five hundred." He could
feel her smirking at those words. The man groaned a bit, although he didn't try to hide his smile
this time.

Silence fell as the two listened to the ticking of the clock. Azriel moved one hand to brush Gwyn's
arm softly, his fingers absently drawing circles on her exposed skin. His shadows were still all over
Gwyn, brushing her skin in a calming manner. He felt her shift and move her head off his chest. He
was about to ask what happened, yet the man never had the chance to as he felt something press
against his lips.

It took him a moment to realize those were Gwyn's soft, plump lips moving over his gently. Azriel
stood still, too stunned to kiss back. It was like he'd never kissed anyone before; he felt like he
couldn't move. After years of knowing each other, months of being together, of constantly assuring
her she was safe with him, Gwyneth was finally kissing him.

Just as he was about to kiss back, eventually getting over the initial shock, Gwyn pulled away.
Azriel took off the cucumbers and placed them back on the plate. He leaned back on his elbows,
studying Gwyn. Even with the green face mask, he could tell she was blushing.

"I-I am sorry," she said in a small voice, playing with the end of the shirt she wore - his shirt, long
enough to cover up Gwyn.

His eyebrows raised at her words. "I - what for?"

"For kissing you," Gwyneth said in a small voice.

Azriel frowned at her words. Why was she apologizing for kissing him? "Do you regret it?" He
asked calmly, although he could feel his heart beating faster. The thought of Gwyn regretting
kissing him made his stomach turn.

Gwyneth's eyes widened, and she frantically shook her head. "What? No, Azriel, not at all!" She
quickly grabbed his hand, her teal eyes staring into his hazel ones. She chewed on her lower lip as
she could tell Azriel was waiting for her to continue. "I just- you did not kiss me back, so I figured
you didn't like it. I know I am not experienced, I've never kissed anyone before, but-"

She stopped as Azriel moved to sit on his knees in front of her. His scarred hands moved to cup her
cheeks, ignoring the odd feeling of the now dried facial mask against his calloused palms. He kept
staring into her eyes, leaning closer. He stopped as their lips were inches away from touching; he
was waiting for her approval. Gwyn's lips slightly parted, and she nodded, her eyes never leaving
his. He smiled a bit before pressing his lips against hers. He sucked onto her lower lip softly.
Cauldron, kissing her - it was magnificent. Her lips were so soft. He could still taste the chocolate
from the piece of cake she ate earlier. It took all the power in him not to kiss her with the passion
he wanted to. No, she was not ready yet. Azriel could tell he was her first kiss from the way she
clumsily moved her lips against his. But he didn't care; even with centuries of experience,
hundreds, if not more, of women kissed before, this was the best kiss he'd ever had. Because he
was kissing the woman he loved.

Azriel pulled away as he could tell Gwyn could not keep up anymore. He smiled, softly, then
kissed the tip of her nose, not caring about that damn facial mask. "I didn't kiss back because I was
surprised, Gwyneth." He said softly, pushing back a strand of her hair that fell from her bun.

"Gwyneth?" She scrunched her nose as he used her full name, making Azriel laugh.

His arms wrapped around her as he pulled her against his chest in a hug. "This was the best kiss
I've ever had." Azriel heard Gwyn snort at his words.

"You're just saying that to make me feel good,"

"Am not!"

"Yes, you are!" She chuckled and pulled away slightly to look up at him. "You've been with many,
many, MANY women. Do you really expect me to believe that I am your best kiss?" Azriel smiled,
softly.

"I may have kissed many, many, MANY women - and not only that," he grinned a bit at that, only
to receive a soft punch in his stomach from Gwyn, "but... I loved none of them, so those kisses
were insignificant." Azriel murmured, tracing her cheek with his thumb.

Her eyes widened at his words. She was clearly taken aback. He could not blame her; none of them
told the other the three magic words. Until now, when, indirectly, Azriel told her he loved her.

"Do you mean it?" Gwyn whispered, her eyes watery now.

Azriel leaned closer, his lips brushing over hers. "I love you." With that, Gwyn closed the distance
between them and wrapped her arms around him.
 "I love you, too." She whispered between kisses. Azriel smiled against her lips, his hands gripping
her waist, pulling her closer to the warmth of his body. She tentatively sucked on his lower lip, a bit
unsure, yet Azriel was in heaven. He was so focused on her that it took him a couple of moments to
register what his shadows were whispering to him.

Cassian...Nesta...

Before he could react, he heard the door being forcefully opened. Azriel broke the kiss, his head
turning quickly to the door. Nesta and Cassian stood there, both frozen as they took in the image.

Azriel and Gwyn on the floor. His hands on her waist, hers on his shoulders; both panting from
kissing - and having green, facial masks all over their faces. On top of that, Azriel also wore a pink
headband to hold the longer part of his hair back from his face.

It was Cassian who broke the silence, his laughter filling the whole room - hell, probably the whole
house. The man placed a hand on his knee, choking on laughter. "You-you-" Cassian tried to talk,
pointing to Azriel, but it was impossible. Tears were running down his cheeks and he soon fell
down on the floor. "You're really a simp!" He finally managed to say, although it was barely
understandable.

Nesta bit the inside of her lip, holding back her laughter. Yet a wicked smile appeared on her face
as she looked at Azriel. He rolled his eyes, sighing. "Don't you knock?" Azriel murmured,
frowning at Cassian. That bastard - he was probably mentally shouting at Rhys to let him know
about this.

"Someone is grumpy." Nesta teased, chuckling. It was clear that she was trying her best not to
laugh as hard as her mate.

Gwyn bit down her lip, amused by this as well. She looked at Azriel, then grinned. "Would you
like to join us?" Azriel raised his eyebrows at her, then grinned back.

Nesta smirked and nodded. "That'd be delightful! A double date!" At those words, Cassian stopped
laughing. He looked at the girls, then at Azriel, horrified.

"Great!" Gwyn got up and walked over to the desk. "Oh, and Cass," she turned her head to look at
the general over her shoulder, "don't worry, I have a pink hairband for you as well. So you and Az
can match." She winked.

Cassian started quietly swearing as Nesta dragged him to where Azriel stood. The shadowsinger
smirked as Cassian glared at him. He threw his arm over Cassian's shoulders, pulling his brother
closer to him. "Welcome to the simp club, brother."

"Fuck off," Cassian murmured.

That night, Cassian ended up just like Azriel - his face covered in the green mask and his long hair
held back by the pink hairband.

Chapter End Notes

Okay, but imagining the powerful bat boys like this was really fun to write haha.
Thank you SO much for all the kudos and comments! They made my day! I hope you
enjoyed this fluff Gwynriel, because I honestly live for things like this. However, the
next one-shot is going to be...intense (spoiler: prepare for jealous Az)
 Jealousy
Chapter Summary

After a shocking realisation, Azriel avoided Gwyn. He deserved anything Gwyn

would throw in his way for running away from her - but dancing with Balthazar,
letting him touch her, everything under his nose... it was too much for Azriel to
handle. Yet, a heated discussion reveals secrets that change the dynamics between the
spymaster and priestess.

Chapter Notes

This chapter is more intense than the last two. There will be two POVs: first Azriel's,
followed by Gwyn's.
A little warning: sexual tension and a jealous Azriel, as well as a small mention of
trauma.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

The loud music made Azriel's headache more unbearable than usual. Well, the music was not the
main reason his headache was like that.

It was not uncommon for Mor to throw extravagant parties for her birthday. This year has been no
different. As always, she rented the whole place, so only the people close to her would be there.
Besides, Morrigan loved nothing more than having Rita's all to herself and her friends.

Azriel's gaze was fixed on the dance floor as his hazel eyes pierced the red-haired beauty - more
precisely the man next to her, who has been a close friend of the girls' for a while now. His fingers
became white from the grip he had on the glass. "Easy there, brother. You don't want the drink to
spill on you." Azriel did not move his eyes towards the person who spoke to him - Cassian.
Instead, he slammed his glass against the table.

"You know, shooting daggers at Balthazar won't make him stop dancing with Gwyneth," it was
Rhys who spoke this time. Azriel knew he was right, but he couldn't do anything about it.

He was such a fool. He deserved what was happening to him right now.

The things between him and Gwyn were good - so good that last week Gwyn kissed him. Yes, she
kissed him. She trusted him enough to do this. After all that Gwyneth had experienced, she was
finally comfortable enough around a man, comfortable enough to kiss a man - and that man was
him. And what did he do in return?

He walked away from her.

Azriel was certain that there was no man who behaved as cowardly as he did at the time. Because
that kiss... it was more than Azriel would have imagined. He still trembled as he remembered the
moment when her lips moved against his; how she was hesitantly pressing them against his, how
they moved gently - but above all, what Azriel felt at that time: warmth spreading over him;
something like an old song that echoed in his mind. And then, that invisible string being pulled
from his heart to hers. The feeling that he had been desperate for centuries, had been jealous of all
those who had felt it before him - the mating bond.

Gwyn was his mate - and all he could do when he realised it was walk away. Ironic, wasn't it? He
had been craving to have a mate for so long - and when Cauldron finally blessed him with one, he
just left.

Why?

Because Azriel was terrified; only then did he realise that he was not ready to have a mate. Not
Gwyn, at least - and not because he did not want her. Mother, no, far from that. Gwyn was the
woman of his dreams. In the years that they had known and grown close to each other, he was at
her utter mercy. She was able to charm him like no woman ever did. What he felt for Mor and
Elain seemed like childish crushes compared to what he felt for Gwyn. And Azriel was well aware
of his feelings even before the bond snapped for him.

Yet Gwyn deserved better, so much better.

And he was scared of rejection. For centuries, that was the only thing that he experienced with the
women he was romantically interested in; first Mor, then Elain. He did not want Gwyneth to reject
him as well; no, he could not have her, his mate reject him. Azriel knew it was selfish of him that
he was putting his own disappointment over what Gwyn could feel for him. But what could he do -
he was a mess.

For the past week, he did his best to avoid her. Each time she wanted to approach him, he managed
to leave. He was fearless enough to fight armies with bare hands; but when it came to confronting
Gwyn, he was a scaredy-cat. He knew he'd have to talk to her eventually, yet he was still pushing
the moment back.

Everyone was aware that Illyrians were more possessive over their mates than others. However, for
Azriel to finally feel what it was like... he trained for centuries in order to never lose control, never
act on rage - all this training seemed like a waste of time at that moment, when it took all the power
in Azriel not to jump at Balthazar's throat for daring to dance with Gwyn. He didn't care that Gwyn
valued Balthazar's friendship a lot, that he was close to her - hell, those thoughts infuriated him
even more.

Azriel saw red as he spotted Balthazar's hand settling on her hip, his body slightly bending, so he
could whisper something in her ear - whatever the hell he said made her giggle. Azriel was about
to get up when a hand grabbed onto his shoulder, squeezing it firmly. "Don't make a scene."
Rhysand hissed.

"He's right, don't act upon your rage," Cassian said quietly, although they were the only ones
settled in the booth with drinks. "What happened to you?"

Azriel finally tore his gaze from the dance floor to look at his brothers. "I think both of you can
tell," he said through his teeth. He noticed Cassian flinch slightly, probably surprised by Azriel's
attitude. "I think you figured out why I am this angry."

The men nodded. Azriel knew they realised Gwyn was his mate without him having to tell them.
"Judging by the way she is dancing with Balthazar, she does not know about it." Rhysand said as
he crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes moving to the dance floor. "Or you fucked up, and she
wants to make you pay for it in a very cruel way." He continued and raised one eyebrow.
"She doesn't know." Azriel confirmed, staring at the glass in front of him. He knew looking at
Gwyn and Balthazar was risky. "But I did fuck up, so this may be her way of making me pay for
being a coward and a bastard."

Rhysand looked back at Azriel, surprised. Cassian raised his eyebrow at that and, after sipping his
whiskey, he asked, "What have you done?"

Azriel groaned. "I bet Nesta told you."

From the way Nesta glared at Azriel the whole week and how she snarled at him each time he tried
to talk to her, the shadowsinger was more than certain that Gwyn told her friends everything.

"She didn't want to tell me. All she said was that you're a fucking asshole - which is nothing new to
me." Cassian shrugged, his words making Rhys chuckle a bit. Azriel glared at his brothers, then
rolled his eyes.

"Well, whatever you did - go talk to her. Tell her about the bond. Hiding it from her is not wise -
trust me on that," Rhys said and grinned a bit. Azriel did not have time to answer as he spotted
Feyre and Gwyn walking towards them, their arms linked, both of them laughing.

And even now seeing Gwyn he felt like he could not breathe. Compared to the other women at
Mor's party, what Gwyn wore could be considered innocent, modest. Yet, given Gwyn's usual
clothing, this was anything but modest for her taste. The dress she wore was made out of silk, with
thin straps going over her shoulders. It did not expose any cleavage, and it stopped right at her
knees. But Mother, the way it clung to her curves, the cut that exposed her whole back - Azriel
almost choked when he first saw the dangerously low cut to her lower back. He had no idea who
gave her this dress, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to thank that person or kill them.

As they stopped, Gwyn's eyes fixed on Azriel; there was no emotion on her face, but her eyes were
burning - she was either content with the show she put on by dancing all night with Balthazar - too
close to Azriel's preference, or she was contemplating whether she should beat him or not. Probably
both.

Azriel could feel his brothers' eyes on him, as well as Feyre's. He had no escape now. With a sigh,
Azriel got up and walked to Gwyn. He watched her reaction, but there was still nothing. Feyre went
to sit in Rhys' lap and started chatting with them, probably to give the two privacy - even though
the shadowsinger could bet they would be listening to whatever he and Gwyn would say.

Gwyn's eyebrows raised a bit and Azriel realised he had been standing in front of her for some time
without saying a word. "Can we talk...outside?" Azriel finally asked, keeping his eyes on Gwyn's,
no matter how tempting it was for him to roam his eyes all over her body, take in her delicious
curves emphasised so well by the burgundy dress.

She was about to answer but stopped as the new song started playing. "Hmm, I don't know. I like
this song," Gwyn gently tapped her lower lip with her slender index finger, pretending to think.
Azriel's gaze flickered down her finger, and he found himself staring at her lips. He quickly looked
back into her eyes and took a deep breath, trying not to focus on the sudden tightness of his pants.
"What do you say we talk on the dance floor??" She grinned.

Azriel's eyebrows shot up. "Dance floor?" He looked behind her, then shook his head. "I don't
dance." He said it firmly.

He saw something flashing in her eyes - anger perhaps? Even if it was that the grin on her face
didn't show a sign of it. "All right, then wait. I am going to dance - I am sure Balthazar would
love to dance with me."

She did not just say this.

Azriel gritted his teeth at those words, but Gwyn just smirked. She turned around and walked over
to the dance floor. Without a second thought, Azriel followed her. He almost dropped to his knees
as he saw Gwyn moving her long, copper hair over her shoulder, exposing her naked back to him.
She was doing it on purpose. She knew what effect she had on him.

Gwyn abruptly stopped and Azriel almost collided with her back. She turned to face him and tilted
her head to the side. Azriel wasn't sure what to do - he knew that he wanted to grip her hips and
pull her against him, feel her body against his. He wanted her as close to him as possible.

Yet touching Gwyn without her consent would never happen. As hard as it was to resist his desire,
Gwyn's comfort was more important to him.

"You know, standing feet apart and not touching wouldn't exactly be considered dancing." Gwyn
took a step closer and her hands moved to his shoulders. Azriel swallowed the lump in his throat.
Her chest was brushing against his and he could feel the softness and roundness of her breasts. He
knew she had no bra on, he could tell the moment he saw her back - another reason why he thought
he'd pass out any moment when he saw her exposed skin. But to actually feel them like this, to be
aware of the thin materials of her dress and his shirt that kept their naked chests from touching - his
eyes almost rolled back at that thought.

Cauldron, he acted as if she were the first woman he'd ever been so close to. And to think that
Azriel had a lot of women in bed and had done countless things with them - and some were
unspeakable, given how dirty they had been. However, at that time nothing mattered, because there
had not been, was not, and would never be any other woman to top Gwyn. She was a goddess to
him.

Azriel felt Gwyn move a hand off his shoulder to find his own, guiding them to her hips. "There,
now we are dancing." She murmured, her teal eyes staring intensely into his. He could not look
away. He was mesmerized by her beauty. How did he get so lucky to be given a mate as perfect as
her? He was so lost in staring at her that he only noticed her moving closer when her lips brushed
his.

After everything he had done, she still wanted to kiss him.

But he needed to talk to her first. "Gwyneth, don't." Azriel's demand came out suffocated, his hands
tightening on her hips. And damn that he was stupid because her facial expression killed him. He
watched her confidence wash away and be replaced by something like shame. Gwyneth stared at
him, her teal eyes wide - she seemed to be a few moments away from crying.

No, no, no, do not upset our mate.

His shadows were frantically whispering to him, swirling around the two of them. They managed
to stay hidden the whole night, but the tension between Gwyn and Azriel made them come out to
protect them from the curious eyes - most importantly, to protect Gwyn.

Our mate is about to cry, say something!

The shadows were stroking her cheeks, going through her hair; they did all they could to make
Gwyn feel better.

She took a step back from Azriel, the shame disappearing quickly and anger taking its place. He
expected Gwyn to yell at him, hit him - anything but what she did. "Fuck you, Azriel!" Gwyn
cursed and turned on her heels to storm out.

He fucked up.

Again.

-----

She didn't know what came over her, why she had reacted like this. Maybe because she was over it.
She really thought Azriel felt something for her. That he felt just what she did. That he also lo-

"Gwyn!" She kept walking despite the voice calling after her desperately. She pushed the doors
open and gasped as the cold air hit her. Gwyn bit down her lip and looked around. The streets were
empty, faint noises coming from the club.

How could she be that stupid? To imagine someone like the spymaster of the Night Court,
someone as handsome as Azriel that could have any female he wished would ever feel something
for someone like her? Azriel made it very clear he did not return her feelings by leaving after that
kiss. Mother, she still cringed as she remembered the disappointment that took over her the
moment Azriel turned his back on her without a word. Was she so awful to kiss?

But Cauldron, she had hoped that maybe he was just shocked the first time.

No, Azriel confirmed moments earlier he was not shocked but just didn't like her back.

She felt a soft touch against her wrist and she looked down to see one of his shadows. Gwyn
sighed, aware of the shadowsinger's presence behind her. "What?" Her voice came out more bitter
than she wanted.

"Gwyn, we need to talk."

"About what?!" She turned to face him, frowning. "You made it very clear how you truly feel
about me. Not once, but twice." Gwyn hissed and took a step closer to Azriel. He showed no
emotion, just watched her carefully. She knew it was probably his training that made him
so...impassible. And damn it, she hated it so much. Because even though Gwyn tried to keep the
same impassible face, her voice and eyes betrayed her.

"Gwyn-"

"Am I that horrible?" Her words clearly took him by surprise as his eyebrows raised. Good, finally
some emotion. "Is the thought of trying something with me, of being with me that horrendous to
you?!" Gwyn hated how shaky her voice came out. But she could not hold it back.

The priestess saw his eyes darken, his jaw set. "Is that what you think," Azriel also took a step
closer to her, "that I find the idea of being with you unpleasant?" His voice was low - and far
scarier than a shout.

"Again, you made it very clear!"

Azriel let out a small chuckle. A dark, almost disgusted chuckle. He looked away and Gwyn
noticed just how hard he was gritting his teeth now. "You want to know the truth?" He kept
looking away as he spoke. "Do you want to know why I left after you kissed me? Why have I been
avoiding you? Why was I moments away from beating the shit out of Balthazar for being so close
to you tonight?"
Gwyn's eyes widened a bit. Oh, she did not expect that last part. She knew he had been staring at
them the whole night; not only all the girls pointed it out, but she could feel it. And, to her shame,
she had hoped it was out of jealousy. Had hoped this would push him to talk to her, come clean
about his feelings.

When Gwyn did not respond, Azriel shook his head. He took a step towards her and their chests
were brushing. Gwyn shivered at the feeling, at how close he was. He bent his head, his eyes
staring into hers. "Because you're my mate, Gwyn." Azriel almost snarled. Her eyes widened and
she parted her lips to say something, but it was Azriel's time to talk now. "And I was a fucking
coward and got scared. Because all my life I've been rejected and I thought you'd do the same -
reject me. Because you deserve someone better than me. This is why I've been like this."

She did not think of what she did next. It was like her body was acting out on its own.

Her hand met his cheek - and she slapped him. He just confessed that she was his mate. And all she
could do was slap him. Well, in her defense, it was not a hard slap, but still-

Azriel looked at her confused, "I was expecting something harder than this." He admitted.

"How could you?" Gwyn took a step back, her voice trembling. "How could you not tell me? How
could you assume I would reject you?!" She almost screamed. "How could you be so selfish and
not give me a chance to let you know how I truly feel?"

Azriel watched her carefully, although she could now tell he was surprised. "I - you're right."

Gwyn's face softened a bit. But the woman was still very angry. "How do you feel about me,
Azriel?" She asked, crossing her arms over her chest. "No, a better question - how did you feel
about me before the mating bond snapped for you?"

There was something flashing in Azriel's eyes - pain? She could not tell. He was quiet for a couple
of minutes and she knew he was trying to find a way to express himself. "I- in all honesty, I started
liking you a long time ago, Berdara. More than like, in fact." He started and ran a hand through his
hair. "I wanted nothing more than to be with you and only you. To hold you in my arms and make
you feel safe. To protect you, to -" He stopped a bit as if he was holding back, but continued at her
demanding stare, "- have you under me, on top of me, however you wanted, to make you whimper
in pleasure."

She gulped at his last statement, her cheeks reddening a bit. To her surprise, the thought did not
repulse her or terrify her at all. "But your comfort will always come first, Gwyn. I did not want to
step on any boundary, "Azriel kept talking and sighed. "I wanted to confess, however. I swear I did.
But you beat me to it with your kiss and-"

"And then the bond snapped?" She finished it for him. Azriel nodded. The girl chewed on her
lower lip and looked down. "You should've talked to me."

"I know."

Gwyn placed her hands on his muscular arms. She took a deep breath, then smiled. "Azriel, I could
never reject you." Gwyn whispered, "From the moment we locked eyes at the training for the first
time after that incident..." She stopped and closed her eyes. No, she would not think of that dark
night. Not now, when he was with her. When she was safe. When she was finally getting over her
trauma.

She felt him tense and his shadows brushed her skin. Gwyn smiled and looked at Azriel again, her
eyes reassuring him she was alright. "I felt drawn to you. Intrigued. You saved me, Azriel, and I've
always trusted you. I know you'll never do something without my consent. And...you helped me
gain courage and be more confident. Of course, the girls and the Inner Circle as well, but it was
you that mattered the most,"

"because each time your eyes gleamed with pride over something I did, it only motivated me
more." Gwyn cupped Azriel's face, "I know the mating bond is important to you. But to me, it's
not. And do you want to know why?"

Azriel just stared at her, gritting his teeth. He nodded with a cold look over his features.

"Because I don't need any bond to know that I want to be with you, Azriel." Her thumb brushed his
cheek. "I don't need a mating bond to snap in order to know that I love you."

She's never seen that many emotions on Azriel's face. His eyes softened, and she felt him shaking.
"I am sure it'll snap for me as well, Azriel," Gwyn continued and took a step closer, "But I want
you to understand this: I love you without a bond and I'm never going to reject you." Gwyn leaned
to push her lips against his. This time Azriel kissed back - and Mother, the way he kissed her, with
such passion that almost knocked her off her feet. His hands were fast to grab her hips and steady
her; his mouth was desperately moving over hers as if she were to disappear at any time.

Gwyn broke the kiss and took a deep breath. She looked into his eyes, then to his lips, and
chuckled as her gloss was smeared all over his mouth now. She brought her thumb to wipe it off.
Azriel chuckled as well. "You know, what you did tonight with Balthazar was very cruel."

She raised her eyebrows. "Oh? Were you jealous?"

"Jealous?" Azriel laughed, "I was so close to murdering him for making you smile." He admitted.

Gwyn shivered at his words, "I didn't mean it at first," Gwyn murmured, "I was genuinely being
normal around him - danced and had fun. You know we are good friends. But then, when Nesta
pointed out you were looking at us, I-" She stopped, blushing as she realised how foolish she had
been. "I kind of wanted to make you jealous. I hoped you'd be and perhaps realise how you truly
feel about me and talk to me."

"Well, we certainly talked." Azriel chuckled. "That was an interesting way, though."

"Blame Nesta for making me read those smutty novels where guys act this way." Gwyn tried to
defend herself, hiding her face in his chest. She smiled at the sound of his laughter. "Please,
promise me something." Gwyn pulled her face away to look up at him. His brows furrowed,
concerned, but he nodded. "Please be honest with me from now on. Talk to me - especially if it's
about us. See how much trouble there is without communication?"

Azriel's face softened at her request. "I promise." He whispered and pressed his lips against her. A
kiss full of love to seal this promise.

"You know," Azriel started, his lips brushing hers, "the sight of you in this dress almost sent me to
my knees." He whispered with a wicked grin.

"You can thank Nesta for it." Gwyn grinned back. She bit down her lip, then moved her lips to his
ear, "However, I have a feeling that the sight of me in any kind of clothing would send you to your
knees."

Azriel gasped at her words, his reaction making Gwyn laugh. "I had no idea you were this bold."
 "Again, blame Nesta for the smutty novels," Gwyn winked as she pulled back. "Plus, I told you I
trust you. I know you'll never force me into anything and I am comfortable around you. I may not
be ready yet for any sexual activities, but I do not mind teasing you about your obvious arousal."

Azriel's lips parted in complete shock over her words. Gwyneth placed a finger under his chin to
close his mouth and chuckled. "Let's get back inside. You owe me a real dance." She grabbed his
hand and pulled him after her back into the club.

He squeezed her hand and Gwyn felt warmth take over her body. She meant every word she told
him tonight; Gwyn loved Azriel without any bond. And nothing was going to change it.

Chapter End Notes

Sooo...this was more intense than the last two. I hope you enjoyed it though. It's quite
long, over 4k words (I know, right?) and it took me like 8 hours to write it. But it was
so worth it, because I've always wanted to write a chapter like this, with Gwyn
confident, as well as them getting together when the bond snapped only for one of
them. Also, I know poor Balthazar is always the one to make our Az jealous, but hey.
Thank you for all your comments and kudos! They mean so much to me! I am sorry
for any existing mistakes, I promise I will correct them all. :)
 Lullaby and baby Nyx
Chapter Summary

While taking care of baby Nyx, Gwyneth has an unexpected visitor. While she and the
shadowsinger spent some time together, the last thing she expected was for him to ask
her to sing - and that he would join her... in his way.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

"For a spymaster, you're pretty lousy." Gwyn didn't try to hide her smile as she watched Azriel
flinch at the sound of her voice, his eyes opening wide.

She could tell he was surprised that she was there. After all, it was not every day Gwyn would be
present in the dining room... especially not with Nyx half asleep in her arms, his chubby fingers
fisting the necklace dangling from her neck. But how could Gwyn say no to her High Lady when
she asked her to take care of Nyx for a couple of hours? Gwyneth has always loved children and
her soul was filled with joy when Feyre handed her Nyx, his big eyes looking at her, curious. It
reminded her of the old times when things were normal - when she was happy.

It's not that Gwyn wasn't happy right now. She thanked the Mother for the people with whom she
was blessed, for her sisters who helped her enjoy life again. For Cassian, who was now like a big
brother and who loved nothing more than to tease her - for Azriel who... she didn't even know
where to start.

She didn't shy away from the fact that she had a weakness for him. He was the one that saved her
life. He stayed with her overtime to help with her combat technique. And most importantly to her:
Azriel would never look at her with pity - although he was the only one to have seen her at her
absolute worst. Gwyn hated being pitied for what had happened to her, because it just made her
feel weak that she let it happen. Azriel seemed to understand this and not once has she spotted pity
in his eyes, but only admiration and encouragement. And that helped her a lot in gaining
confidence.

In addition, Azriel was as competitive as she was. She loved nothing more than to challenge him,
than to be able to wipe that smug grin off his face when she could prove to him that she could do
whatever he threw at her. Gwyneth suspected that he would do it on purpose, that he knew what
his haughty grin did to her ego.

It's been nearly a year since they started training together again after she won the rite. She could
not say that something remarkable happened between them; he seemed to warm up to her more and
see a friend in her - and she also saw a friend in him.

Gwyn wouldn't deny that she fancied him a bit - after all, Azriel was handsome.

Extremely handsome. For Gwyn, he was the most beautiful man she'd ever seen. And she wasn't
the only one who thought that; all the priestesses who trained with him gasped after him and
chuckled when he passed by. They even talked about him quietly in the library. On one occasion a
priestess even asked her what it was like to be alone with Azriel - a question that got Gwyn both
surprised and slightly uncomfortable.

Hell, even Nesta thought he was the most attractive out of the three brothers. And Gwyn knew that
Nesta didn't say that to rub it in Cassian's face and upset him.

Gwyn wouldn't call what she felt for Az love or anything like that - more like a small, girlish
crush.

Besides, even if it were more, she would never dare say a word - because she was aware of his
feelings for the middle Archeron sister, Elain. Not only did she hear Nesta speak briefly about the
complicated relationship between him and her sister, but Azriel hinted it the time he admitted the
necklace he offered her was intended for Elain at first.

It wasn't hard for Gwyn to understand that the necklace came from him. After all, he was the only
one who could have done it - Nesta and Emerie would have given it to her personally and Cassian
would never have given it to her anonymously. So there was only Azriel left. She once asked him
about it when they were training, soon after the mating ceremony of Nesta and Cassian, and Azriel
admitted it. She still remembered the guilt that took over him and how many times he apologized
to her for regifting the necklace.

However, the young priestess was far from upset. Because he was honest enough to tell her that the
gift wasn't for her at first - and she preferred honesty over him making her believe he bought it for
her - and because Azriel decided to give it to her afterwards. He could've returned it; he could've
given it to someone else. But he gave it to her. And she truly felt honoured, and it only made her
cherish the necklace more.

That was months ago. Gwyneth wasn't sure what things were like between Azriel and Elain now.
She didn't dare meddle, even if she was curious. She didn't have the right to do that. But seeing
how Azriel had now reacted to something about Elain - quite normal, no more tensing, she'd say
they were either together or they abandoned the idea of being together.

Yet, no matter how happy Gwyn was now, there would always be pain in her heart - that she had
failed her sister, that she had been weak and that she had lost her sister -

The shadowsinger seemed to recover from his initial shock of getting caught. He rubbed the back
of his neck and avoided looking at Gwyn. "Sorry, I-" He stopped, clearly embarrassed. Gwyn's
eyebrows raised. She'd never seen Azriel like this before. "I didn't mean to spy on you or anything.
But I've heard singing and... I was curious, I suppose."

Gwyneth smiled and chuckled softly, then looked down at Nyx who was now sleeping, his lips
parted slightly. "It's okay, I do not mind you watching me sing," Gwyn reassured him, never
tearing her eyes from Nyx.

"You've got a beautiful voice, Gwyn." He mumbled, just audible. The priestess looked at him,
surprised. She saw the shadows peeking at her from behind his wings and Gwyn smiled at them.
They were oddly fond of her, to the point where Azriel was exasperated that he couldn't control
them around her. They'd always wrap around her, caress her face, go through her hair - but Gwyn
didn't mind. At first, she found them interesting, then sweet.

To say that Azriel was surprised when Gwyn told him she found his shadows sweet was an
understatement. He was wordless for a few minutes and looked at Gwyn as if he had never seen
her before, "You never fail to surprise me, Berdara." He told her that day, the surprise replaced by
an amused look.
Azriel observed the spot next to her on the sofa, then looked at her, a silent question in his gaze.
Gwyn just nodded and Azriel started walking towards her. He sat next to her, careful not to touch
her with his wings. "Well, you would have found out sooner if you'd attended my services as I had
told you." Gwyn teased as the Illyrian sat next to her. He snorted at her, although he gave her an
amused smile. "Thank you, Azriel."

He looked closely at the baby Nyx, his eyes moving from the baby, to his hands still gripping the
necklace, to her face. Gwyn lifted her eyebrows and tipped her head, "Something wrong,
Shadowsinger?"

"Nyx likes you, clearly." He said softly, "He sleeps very peacefully in your arms. He's not this calm
in mine... let alone Cassian's." Azriel chuckled and Gwyn joined him. She knew what he was
talking about; Nesta told her and Emerie about one time when Cassian took care of Nyx - or tried
to. And let's just say that the child kept crying in Cassian's arms while the Illyrian general was
doing everything he could to get him to go to sleep - he also tried to sing to him a lullaby which, as
Nesta said, only made Nyx cry louder. Although Cassian denied it, Azriel confirmed what Nesta
said.

Gwyn moved one of her hands to gently brush her fingers on Nyx's soft cheek, her smile widening.
"He seemed really curious to be with me. I think he liked my hair, because he pulled on it for a
while," Azriel laughed a little, "and then his attention moved towards the necklace..." Gwyn
looked back at Azriel with soft eyes. She noticed Azriel slightly tense, but relaxed to her gentle
smile.

"Will you sing again?" Azriel's question caught Gwyn by surprise. "Only if you want, of course."
He added quickly. His shadows moved towards her and swirled around a strand of her copper hair.
She saw him slightly hiss and frown at them. "Please excuse them, but I think their love for you is
no surprise now."

Gwyn chuckled. "Azriel, I told you I like your shadows. You don't need to be the harsh father with
them around me."

And there was that look again from him - that utter surprise. "Harsh father?" Azriel repeated, his
brows furrowed. "You think I am like a father around my shadows?"

Gwyneth shrugged and gently rocked Nyx in her arms. "Well, yes. You're always scolding them
and trying to hold them back around me as if they were misbehaving." Gwyn giggled, "So...pretty
much a harsh father."

Azriel blinked as he looked at her and then laughed. A real strong laugh that dropped his head on
the couch, his body shaking. Gwyn would also have laughed if it wasn't for the sleeping child in
her arms. "Shh, don't be so noisy!" Gwyn murmured, barely holding back her laughter as she softly
hit his leg with her foot.

The spymaster shook his head, covering his face with a scarred hand, "Have I ever told you that
you never fail to surprise me, Berdara?"

"You may have told me that once or twice," Gwyn grinned. She looked down at Nyx who was still
asleep, his cheek pressed against her chest tightly, his mouth slightly open. It took at the power in
Gwyn not to smother his pretty face with kisses. "And to answer your question," Gwyn began,
looking at Azriel, "I'll sing again - if you accompany me."

The amusement in his face was replaced by utter horror. "What? Don't you think that I forgot you
could sing, shadowsinger." She emphasized and raised one eyebrow.
"I- Gwyn, I don't sing to other people," Azriel said and frowned a bit; she knew the frown was not
meant to her, but to the thought of singing.

"So...you've never sung to anyone?" Azriel shook his head. "Not even to Cassian and to the High
Lord?"

Azriel scrunched his nose a bit, "High Lord? Gwyn, Rhys told you countless times not to call him
that," he grinned a bit, "but no, not even to them. They know I sing, but they could never convince
me to sing to them." He paused and glanced at the priestess, "In fact, you're the only person aside
from them that knows I can sing."

Gwyn's lips parted slightly. "Oh? Really?" Gwyn looked away and she could feel her cheeks
slightly heating. He trusted her enough to tell her he sang when they weren't even friends. The
thought was...she didn't allow herself to continue. Instead, the priestess looked back at him with a
wicked smile, "So that means I have something on you?"

Azriel raised one eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest. "Don't even think of using it against
me."

She giggled and shrugged. "We'll see about that," Gwyn smirked. Before Azriel had time to
answer, Gwyn started to sing. It was a soft lullaby she and her sister used to sing to the children
years ago. She would usually close her eyes, letting the grief take hold of her, but now she did not
tear her eyes from Azriel. The pain in her chest was still there, her voice trembling a little. But
watching Azriel's face made her more relaxed than usual. His features were soft, and he closed his
eyes, a little smile on his lips. Unexpectedly, he started to hum along to the song. He didn't exactly
sing, but she could make out his voice. It was deep, yet it had a fascinating softness.

He opened his eyes to look at her, still humming. Gwyn was surprised that he knew the lullaby
even though she shouldn't have. After all, he was old enough to have known a lot of songs.

Gwyn smiled as she finished, biting down her lip. "I thought you said you don't sing to other
people."

"I wouldn't exactly count humming as singing, Gwyneth." He muttered as his eyes scanned her
face. There was something different in his face, in the way he looked at her; as if he had
discovered something new. She wanted to know what had happened, but she stopped when she saw
his hand rising and tenderly leaning to her face. Azriel paused, wavering. She did not think twice
about it as she slowly leaned closer, approval in her eyes.

That was all Azriel needed as his hand brushed her cheek and pulled a strand of hair behind her ear.
He delicately traced it, that look still on his face. Gwyn blushed at the touch and a shiver ran down
her spine. It was the most intimate she'd ever been with him, and... it was nice.

Both flinched at the sound of a little laugh and looked down at baby Nyx who looked at Gwyn
with the same fascination. His small hands stretched out toward her face, and he chuckled,
murmuring incoherent things. "Well, it seems the baby has woken up," Gwyn said gently as she
felt Azriel's hand drifting away from her face. She resisted the feeling of disappointment.

"Indeed." He muttered back. He leaned closer to Nyx, whose eyes moved from the priestess to
him. "Hello there, buddy."

Nyx smiled widely, "Un Azi!" He stretched out his hands to Azriel. Gwyn lifted her eyebrows and
looked at Azriel. The shadowsinger chuckled and picked Nyx from her arms, and the child
immediately wrapped his arms around Azriel's neck.
 "He cannot say uncle Azriel yet, so he calls me un Azi," Azriel explained as he rocked Nyx a bit,
letting him tap on the siphons, fascinated by the blue stones. Gwyn smiled as she saw the look full
of love on Azriel's face as he watched Nyx. She was so tempted to lean closer, to have him hold her
close as they took care of the child.

Gwyn shook the thoughts and smiled. "Looks like you're stuck with me and Nyx for a while,
shadowsinger. 'Cause I bet he won't stop looking at your siphons for a while." Az laughed at her
words and looked at Gwyn, who could not stop her own laugh.

And she swore she could see that loving look in Azriel's eyes as he looked at her laughing.

Chapter End Notes

So...this was it. I love writing fluffy Gwynriel, even though there wasn't anything that
romantic in it - but not all my shots will have Gwynriel in a relationship or ending in
one, just so you know (so yes, you can expect some painful chapters as well that will
make you hate me). I am trying to write as much as I can this week, as in June I won't
be able to update a lot because of exams.
The next chapter will be a fun one and will involve our favourite Illyrian general. And
then...perhaps something sexier...
Anyway, until then...thank you for your comments and all the kudos! Seriously, your
support left me speechless! I did not expect so many people to like my ideas and be so
kind, so I thank you from the bottom of my heart! Hopefully this chapter did not
disappoint! :)
 Bracelets and an unexpected announcement
Chapter Summary

After years of him and Gwyneth being mates, Azriel still cannot make bracelets. But
this does not stop Gwyn from trying to teach him - and mercilessly mocking him.
However, the spymaster notices something odd in Gwyneth's behaviour; and his
realisation changes everything.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Azriel's eyebrows were lifted as his fingers moved slowly. He groaned in annoyance as the thread
wrapped around his fingers.

Years.

He's been trying to do this for years.

And Azriel hasn't been able to make a damn bracelet yet.

A sweet laugh filled their room. Azriel looked from the thread to his mate with a frown - which
only made her grin widen. "The Spymaster of the Night Court. The Shadowsinger. One of the
strongest Illyrians of all time. And-"

He knew how this was going to end; she's been teasing him with those lines for the past eight
years. That's why he cut her off before she could finish, "Do not even think of finishing that
sentence, Berdara." Azriel squinted his eyes and pointed a finger at her, the black thread wrapped
around his fingers.

Amusement flickered in her teal eyes. "Or what, Shadowsinger?" She challenged and raised her
eyebrow. His shadows were softly wrapped around her arms as if to say they were on Gwyn's side,
no matter where this childish bickering would go. Azriel rolled his eyes, even though he gave her a
crooked smile.

"Wait until tomorrow. I promise I won't make the training easy." He grinned.

"When is it easy to train with you?" Gwyn muttered as she rolled her eyes. It only made Azriel
chuckle. "Maybe I'll keep training with Cassian. This month has been very relaxing and easy." She
went on.

Azriel snorted. "If you call training easy, then clearly Cassian did nothing."

Cassian and Azriel were very different in terms of training. They were both great, but Cassian was
somehow softer. He would eventually give in if the girls complained that they were tired and went
with easier exercises - even though it was not often for the Valkyries to complain.

But Azriel - he spared no one. Not even his mate. As much as he loved Gwyneth, training was
training. He could not let her get away without properly teaching her combat techniques; no matter
how difficult they would be for her at first, no matter how dirty the things she would tell him after
being pushed to her limit were, he knew that Gwyn preferred his ways to Cassian's. He knew
Gwyn didn't want any special treatment. And Azriel was not going to give it to her, at least not in
the training ring.

"Or maybe you're too harsh." Gwyn smiled and came close to Azriel. He saw her wrap the threads
out of his fingers. His eyes moved from her slim fingers to her face. No matter how many times he
looked at her, he was still surprised by her beauty.

"I missed you." He whispered, leaning over to kiss the top of her head. Over the past month, Azriel
was gone in a mission to human lands. It had not been easy, especially because being away from
Gwyneth killed him. He knew that she was safe; she was with Nesta and Cassian, and Rhysand
always let him know that she was fine. But being away from his mate was unbearable.

He came back that morning, just in time to watch Gwyn training; however, he noticed that
something was wrong with her. She was out of breath too quickly and seemed to have difficulty
keeping up with Nesta and Emerie - something that had never happened before. Azriel wanted to
know what happened, but he decided not to pressure Gwyn on it - at least not now.

Gwyn tilted her head to kiss his cheek. "I missed you, too, Azriel." She said softly. He knew it
hadn't been easy for her, either. "But," Gwyn grinned as she went on, "it won't stop me from teasing
you about your horrible bracelet making skills."

Azriel groaned and fell on the mattress, "Let me live, woman." He said, exasperated, but also
amused. Gwyn chuckled more and grabbed his hand. He felt her thumb brushing his scars. There
was a time when Azriel was ashamed of them, when he'd do anything to hide his hands from her.
But Gwyn made it very clear that she loved every inch of him. He still could not forget the moment
she lifted his hands to her lips and kissed every scar, repeating over and over how beautiful they
were.

"Already giving up?" Gwyn teased. His shadows were now resting on her shoulders calmly, not
even acknowledging his presence.

He knew that she was saying this to provoke him, but that didn't stop the spymaster from resuming
his seat. "Bring it on." He mumbled and grabbed three threads, each of a different colour. He stared
at them as if they were some deadly objects. Eight years since he and Gwyn were together, since
she had tried to teach him how to make bracelets - and he was still clueless. Honestly, he couldn't
understand how Gwyn moved her fingers so skillfully that she could make the most fascinating
patterns of threads so thin.

He saw Gwyn frowning at the threads. "What?"

"Really? Out of all the colours, you chose those?" She scrunched her nose. Azriel looked down at
the threads and... he saw no problem with the colours: black, dark brown and dark grey. As if she
sensed his confusion, Gwyn sighed, "Az, these colours are too dark. Add something more vivid."

Azriel rolled his eyes. "Whatever my mate wishes." He said in a mocking tone, grinning widely.
She playfully smacked his muscled arm and got to the edge of the bed, then rose up. However,
when she walked two steps to the desk, he saw her legs shaking slightly. She stopped and held out
her hand as if she tried to reach for some support. Azriel did not think twice as he was immediately
on Gwyn's side, grasping her arm gently, but with enough strength to stabilise her.

Her eyes were closed, her brows furrowed. "I'm fine. I'm just a little dizzy." She muttered, but did
not protest as Azriel helped her to sit on their bed. The man knelt down before her, and his
shadows swirled frantically around her.
There is something about her - her scent changed.

Azriel knew that his shadows were right. He could sense something different in her scent from the
moment he saw her that morning. It was a slight change that Azriel could not catch up yet. Her
cycle came to his mind first, but he knew it wasn't that.

"Gwyn, tell me what's going on." He said gently, his hands on her knees. "I noticed from the
moment I saw you this morning something was wrong. You were breathless, barely keeping up
with the girls - and now this."

Gwyn chewed on her lower lip and didn't dare face his eyes. Azriel was a patient man, but not
when it came to the safety and health of his mate. It was hard not to push her on telling him what
was wrong. But he saw she was nervous and tried to find a way to tell him - which only drove him
madder. If anyone had dared to hurt Gwyneth-

Her hand unconsciously brushed her belly. Such a small gesture that could have gone unnoticed - if
it hadn't been for her strange behaviour that day.

And then it clicked.

Azriel's eyes widened. He would've fallen to his knees if he wasn't already in that position. "Are
you-" His voice was rough, his hands shaking on her knees.

Gwyn's eyes finally met his own; and the fear in them was enough to answer him. Without even
thinking about it, Azriel had Gwyn in his arms. His wings wrapped them and formed a cocoon to
protect her. She cuddled against his chest, her hands shaking. "I am sorry for not telling you
sooner. But I had no idea how to tell you," a little break, then she went on, "and we talked about it
before, and we agreed to wait a little longer until--"

Azriel slightly moved Gwyn out of his chest to look at her face. Her eyes were wide and slightly
watery; she was holding her tears back. Her lower lip was trembling. Azriel brushed her cheek with
his thumb. He bent his head to gently kiss her lips. A kiss filled with love. "Gwyn, please don't
apologise. I'm far from being upset." He murmured as he pressed his forehead against hers. He felt
her relax a bit, "But I want to know how you feel about it." Because it was more important than
how he felt about her pregnancy; she was the one to bear a child - his child.

"I am nervous; scared." She admitted, a tear rolling down her cheek. He wiped it with his thumb,
"But I'm also very happy." Gwyn whispered and laid her hands on his cheeks. "because yes, we
have been through a lot in our lives and, even after all those years, we continue to heal from them.
Yet, we are going to be great. Together." She kissed the tip of his nose and then laughed, "You will
be an amazing father, Azriel. And I - I am going to be a cool mother."

Her words and the confidence in her voice made the tears he was holding back run down his
cheeks. Gwyn wiped his tears away and then both let out a happy laugh. "You made me the
happiest man ever, Gwyneth." He whispered and kissed her cheeks. "Do you know what we are
having?"

Gwyn chuckled and shook her head. "I am not that far yet. But Majda said she will soon be able to
tell." Gwyn bit her lip a bit, then continued, "Although considering my frequent sickness and
dizziness, Majda believes it will be a girl."

His eyes lit at the thought. Well, Azriel didn't mind the gender. All he was interested in was that
his child and mate were safe. But part of him had always hoped to have a daughter. Azriel kissed
her head and then grinned. "I'm gonna kill Rhysand for hiding this from me."
 "He doesn't know." Gwyn quietly said, "The only one who knows is Feyre; in fact, she is the one
that realised my sickness and change in scent were because I was pregnant. She took me to Madja
and also helped me hide the scent - not completely, but enough to not give away." Azriel's
eyebrows have risen a little. That was why the change in her scent was barely noticeable.

"I didn't want the others to find out before you, Az." Gwyn whispered and kissed him.

Azriel smiled and slowly tucked his wings back. "I love you," He gently helped Gwyn stand up,
yet the man kept kneeling in front of her. His hands stayed on her hips, and he leaned his head until
his lips pressed against her belly. "And I love you more than anyone else, little baby." Azriel
muttered, his eyes staying on her still flat abdomen.

"Oh, so are we already starting the competition of who loves our future child more?" Gwyn teased
as her hand went through his raven hair. Azriel laughed, rolled his eyes and planted another kiss on
her belly. "I love you, too, Azriel. And I love our future child more." She grinned.

Azriel looked up at Gwyn with love. And an image suddenly appeared in his mind: Gwyn holding
a little giggling girl in her arms; the little girl's black hair was braided, her teal eyes joyfully fixed
on him.

He had never felt so much before. He was happy and thrilled. The woman he loved was pregnant
with his child. He was about to become a father. They were going to have a family.

He was scared, too. There was fear that he would be a horrible father. However, he did not let these
thoughts take hold of him.

Because he had Gwyn. They will continue to be there for each other, helping with the doubts and
the insecurities that would exist constantly.

And they're gonna be great parents just like Gwyn said.

They were in this together.

Always together.

Chapter End Notes

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I had a different idea at first, but I could not help
myself because I am so soft for moments like this.
Thank you for your love and support. They mean a lot! I hope this chapter did not
disappoint.
Excuse any existing mistakes, I am going to correct them all soon. :)
 First kisses and Nyx snitching
Chapter Summary

Azriel and Gwyn shared a heated kiss while Nyx was asleep - or at least that's what
they believed. But one interesting family dinner lets them know that Nyx wasn't
exactly sleeping at the time.

Chapter Notes

This chapter was inspired by one comment made by Ris on chapter 4: Lullaby and
Baby Nyx thank you for this wonderful idea! I did say I was going to borrow it and
I promised to WiseGirl269 that I would write it, so... here it is.
You can consider this related to the fourth chapter, only set a couple of years later if
you wish - or not, your choice.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

"Azi and Gwynnie kissy- kissy!"

The Shadowsinger did not know what to focus on: the frantic whirlwind of his shadows around his
hands, the sudden heat he felt taking over his face, the loud squealing that left Mor's lips or the
wine Cassian spit on Azriel as soon as those words left Nyx's mouth.

However, the sharp suck in breath made his attention shift to the person next to him. Gwyn's face
was flushed, her eyes wide. His shadows moved to trace her hands that were gripping her robe
tightly.

She is nervous... embarrassed that everyone is staring at you two!

Indeed, all the eyes were upon them. Even he felt a little nervous - he couldn't imagine how strong
those feelings were for Gwyn, who, like him, despised having attention on her. More than him, in
fact, because more than five hundred years with people like Rhys, Mor and Cassian have
somewhat accustomed him to reactions like this one.

Again, somewhat. It didn't mean he enjoyed it or that he didn't feel uncomfortable.

His eyes were on her. Azriel hoped she would calm down soon. His shadows have done their best
to caress her skin, to comfort her. He was about to grab her hand and try to soothe her, but Gwyn
seemed to beat him to it. Her iron-like grip made him flinch in surprise. His thumb gently brushed
the back of her hand, as if to tell her things would be okay.

With his free hand, Azriel calmly reached for the napkin Feyre held out for him and wiped the
wine Cassian spit on his face. He looked down at his shirt, stained with it. Well, at least it was
black, so it wasn't very noticeable.

His hazel eyes scanned the room, taking in each reaction: surprise and excitement for Feyre, Mor,
Emerie, Elain and Nesta; curiosity for Rhysand, Amren and Lucien; shock for Cassian.

And the four-year-old was happily giggling on his aunt's knees, looking from Gwyn to Azriel - and
Azriel could swear to have seen a sort of proud look on Nyx's face as he leaned back against Elain
and kept chuckling.

That little bastard; they thought he was asleep!

"For how long has this been going on?" It was Nesta who broke the silence, her eyes squinting.

In all honesty, Azriel had no idea what to make of what was going on between him and Gwyneth
either - not even after what happened about an hour ago. In the past few years, all that's happened
between them was flirting. Nothing else. Gwyn knew how to press his buttons, how to challenge
him in a way that no woman has done in more than five hundred years.

She was an enigma to him; Gwyn never failed to surprise him. And Azriel was hardly ever
surprised. He stopped thinking about how he felt once for Mor and Elain, because he could only
think about his feelings for Gwyn. Try to understand them. He wasn't sure if he should call what he
felt love, at least not yet, but he was aware that those feelings weren't just friendly.

However, Gwyn never seemed too interested in any kind of relationship with him; she seemed just
to like to tease him, defy him. The flirting - he didn't know what to make of it. Perhaps Gwyn was
not aware that she was flirting with such ease.

Or at least that's what he thought until not long ago.

He was taking care of Nyx as the boy slept when Gwyn walked into the living room. As usual,
they fell into an easy conversation - which, eventually, led to Gwyn confidently stating she was
soon going to beat Azriel in a sparring.

"You wouldn't be able to beat me, Berdara, not even in one of my bad days." Azriel grinned as he
watched the priestess huff in annoyance.

"Oh, yeah? I'll make sure to remind you those words when you'll be knocked on your ass under
me." Gwyn smiled and flipped her long, copper hair over one shoulder in a confident manner. This
only made Azriel roll his eyes, although he found this gesture amusing.

"Your irreverence is charming, Gwyneth." Azriel teased.

Gwyn's lips parted and she placed a hand on top of her chest in a fake-hurt manner. "Oh, that's
what you think of me?" She quirked one eyebrow, then grinned wickedly, "You'll regret it,
Shadowsinger!"

He barely had time to register what happened next. Gwyn lunged at him, knocking him back on the
sofa, her hands going to tickle his sides.

Yes, tickle him. She was trying to tickle him.

That only made him laugh, a hearty one that it was very rare for someone to get out of him - but
Gwyn had no trouble doing it. This was a comical situation. He didn't even want to imagine what
he looked like: a warrior over five hundred years old, one of the most powerful Illyrians, who was
tickled by a beautiful priestess in her thirties. Azriel knew that his brothers would have mocked him
mercilessly if they had seen them now.

"Take those words back!" She giggled, hovered over him as her fingers moved quickly against his
sides. His shadows were brushing his sides as well - they were trying to help Gwyn tickle him.
Whose side were they on? Well, the answer was obvious, but still -

"Or what, Berdara?" Azriel challenged with a cocky grin.

Gwyn frowned and stopped, still hovering over him. Her hair fell over her shoulder, the tips
brushing his cheek. He stretched one of his hands out, gently pushing her hair over her arched ear.
His finger traced its shape and Azriel couldn't help but remember the time he did the same thing
years ago when he walked on Gwyn babysitting Nyx. Only that back then she wasn't half on top of
him.

Pushing her rich, copper hair behind her ear; this gesture was so innocent - yet Azriel has never
felt this sort of intimacy before with any woman.

His hazel eyes studied her face. Cauldron, she was magnificent. Azriel had always found Gwyn
beautiful; but the moment he had truly started seeing her had he realised no woman could match
her beauty. He could stare at her for hours, days, months, years and he would never find her
beauty dull.

Her teal eyes were gleaming and she seemed to be studying his face as well. Her cheeks were
slightly flushed, lips parted.

Mother, those lips. So plump, he ached to feel them against his.

Azriel's eyes moved from her lips back to her eyes, only to find hers staring back at his lips. When
her teal eyes finally moved back to his eyes, both seemed to think of the same thing.

It was like a force pulling them together like magnets, both leaning closer to each other. Azriel
halted, looking at Gwyn, waiting for her approval - or her retreat had she decided she didn't want
him. Yet she nodded and it was all Azriel needed.

His hands moved to cup her cheeks and he pulled her against him, their lips touching. They felt as
exquisite as he had imagined - no, even better. He sucked on her lips, taking his time to savour
their taste. His tongue traced her lower lip softly and Gwyn parted her lips, granting him the
access he longed for.

They poured everything into that kiss. All the tension that has built for years, the obvious want they
had for each other. Gwyn tried her best to follow his lead, slightly clumsy, yet Azriel had never felt
more blessed than at that moment.

Gwyn pulled away, gasping for air. Her lips were swollen and Azriel fought the urge to kiss her
again. Instead, his thumb brushed her cheek. "Was this your way of convincing me to take back my
words, Berdara?" Azriel raised one eyebrow.

"Did it work?"

Azriel pretended to think for a moment, "Hm, perhaps I need more convincing." He grinned. Gwyn
rolled her eyes slightly, yet she didn't try fighting the beaming smile.

Without another word, Gwyn leaned in for another passionate kiss.

Azriel snapped out of his thoughts as he realised they were still carefully watched. He glanced at
Gwyn, whose blush faded, yet her face was paler than usual. "Um, for about one hour?" Azriel
finally spoke.
"One hour?" Rhys repeated, tilting his head to the side.

Gwyn nodded slightly and finally looked around the room. The colour in her cheeks returned, yet
his shadows let him know she was still nervous. "Yes, we - we kissed for the first time then."

"And who initiated it?"

"Are you two officially dating now?"

"Do you-"

"One question at a time," Azriel sighed, looking from Mor to Emerie to Cassian as they spoke over
each other.

However, it was Lucien who started speaking, "What I think we all are curious about is whether
you two finally decided it's time you got together or not."

Gwyn glanced at Azriel, her grip tightening. Mother, she was strong.

They didn't talk about it. After the kiss, Nyx woke up - well, he pretended to apparently, since that
little bastard had been awake long enough to watch them kiss - and they had to take him back to the
house for dinner.

Azriel could not deny the odd sensation that has been following him since they kissed; that need to
be around her, protect her, make her his. He knew he wanted to be with her.

But what did Gwyn want? Because what she wanted was the most important thing. After
everything that happened to her -

"I wouldn't mind trying something with you, Shadowsinger." Gwyn's words surprised Azriel. He
stared at her and it was time for his grip on her hand to tighten. She looked at him shyly, her teal
eyes filled with so much emotion.

He wanted to kiss her right there. "I wouldn't mind it either, Priestess." Azriel murmured back.
Both smiled at each other and Azriel brought her hand up to his lips, planting a gentle kiss on her
freckled skin.

"I told you they would be together eventually!" Mor screamed and jumped from her seat, clapping
her hands. "We won, you lost!

Azriel turned his head to look at the others. "Lost?"

"What exactly?" Gwyn asked with one eyebrow arched.

Lucien and all the women, except for Amren, grinned widely - hell, even Nyx grinned as if he
understood what was happening, and perhaps he did. Cassian and Rhys just frowned at the women
and Lucien, while Amren looked mildly uninterested.

And Azriel finally got it. "Don't tell me you made a bet on whether we would get together or not."

But their looks were enough of an answer. "Please, it was obvious you'd date eventually!" Emerie
smirked, leaning back against Mor as soon as the blonde took back her seat.

"How so?" Gwyn asked, confused.

Elain chuckled, running one hand through Nyx's hair. "You two may think you're subtle, but you'd
always stare at each other."

"And the way you two have been acting for the past few years," Feyre smiled, glancing at her
oldest sister.

Nesta grinned and continued for Feyre, "All the teasing, the challenging. You two are the most
competitive people I have ever met and clearly love to push each other; oh, and all the flirting -
don't think we didn't notice the heavy flirting."

"It was only a matter of time until you two finally got over your stubbornness and made a move."
Lucien finished, crossing his arms over his chest.

Azriel raised his eyebrows, unsure of how to feel about this. He looked at Gwyn, but the woman
was simply staring at the females and Lucien, pretty much thinking of the same things as him. He
looked at Rhysand and Cassian, "And what did you two bet on?"

His brothers stayed silent. However, Amren spoke for them. "That you'd be too stubborn and proud
to make a move and end up pinning after Gwyn."

"And what did you bet on?" Azriel asked the petite woman.

Her eyes lit up a bit and she grinned. "Given your past history with pinning, I think my answer is
obvious, boy."

Azriel and Gwyneth looked at each other at the same time. "I don't know if I - we - should be
offended that you all made a bet based on our possible relationship-"

"- or that you three had this little faith in Azriel." Gwyn finished for him, looking at his brothers
and Amren. Rhysand and Cassian mumbled some things under their breaths and glared at Mor who
was doing a happy dance because of the bet she, the girls, and Lucien just won, while Amren
looked amused.

Rhysand finally decided to speak properly. "We are truly happy for you two," he smiled at Azriel
and Gwyn, then glanced at Mor with a frown, "Excuse us for the childish behavior."

The blonde snorted and rolled her eyes. "Jealous."

Cassian stared at Gwyn and Azriel, then finally broke into a broad grin. "Finally!" He got up from
his seat and went to them. He threw one muscled arm over each other's necks, pulling them into a
tight hug. Azriel chuckled a bit, patting his brother's arm.

However, Gwyn panted, "I - I cannot breathe,'' She complained, the arm around her throat most
likely choking her a bit - same happened for Azriel, but at this point he got used to Cassian hugging
him like that. Cassian laughed and planted a kiss on top of her head, then on Azriel's.

Soon after, everyone started congratulating them and talking about how long it took them to finally
give in their feelings. Perhaps they were right, yet Azriel felt like it all happened just at the right
time.

After what felt like forever, they finally moved on to discuss other things that did not involve his
and Gwyn's new relationship.

Azriel noticed Nyx looking intensely in his direction with a big smile on his face. "You-" The
Shadowsinger frowned and pointed a finger at the child, "You pretended to be asleep and spied on
us kissing; then, you snitched on us! Wait until you get older, you'll pay for it." He threatened, yet
 the amusement in his voice was obvious.

Nyx laughed and clapped his hands, excited. Rhys' eyebrows shot up in amusement at his brother's
threat. Gwyn chuckled and gently slapped Azriel's thigh. She leaned her head on his shoulder and
her hand remained on his thigh, her thumb gently brushing it.

Azriel kissed the top of her head, unable to stop the huge smile on his face. He was surrounded by
the people he loved and he has never been happier.

Chapter End Notes

This has to be by far my favourite chapter that I have written. Thank you Ris for the
magnificent idea once again!
I hope you enjoyed this as much as I have! Thank you for all your support, it means so
much to me! :)
Excuse any existing mistakes, I will correct them as soon as I have some time. :)
 Unbreakable promise
Chapter Summary

With each passing day, Azriel gets more and more frustrated about not having a mate.
Gwyn is still haunted by the horrendous events that changed her life forever. But
Cauldron wanted them to meet one fateful night that would bring the two closer.

Chapter Notes

Although the start may be a bit confusing, don't worry, this is a Gwynriel one shot,
haha.
Warning: talk of past trauma, SA (not in detail).

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Azriel could feel his knuckles swell, but the pain only made him hit harder. He had to get rid of all
his frustration; he came to the point where his anger got the best of him - and while Azriel had fun
taking it out on one of his brothers at times, he now had to be alone. He didn't need anyone to
question what was wrong with him, to try to force him to talk.

What was he doing wrong? Was he so unworthy that the Cauldron did not want to give him mate?

For centuries he had longed for that bond. And when Rhysand and Cassian finally got their mates,
he hoped it would be his time, too.

He waited.

And waited.

For nothing. He hoped Elain could be the one for him, that she would be his mate. And he
deserved to have her as his mate. After all, his brothers were mated to her sisters. Wasn't that faith,
destiny, whatever one would want to call it? Wasn't it meant to be - that he and Elain, the middle
sister, would be mates?

Apparently not.

The more he thought of it, the angrier he got. After that incident at the Solstice, he tried to stay
away from Elain. He was far from happy about it and still blamed Rhysand for getting into his
business. But the rational part of him was grateful for it - not only it would've caused chaos, but
Lucien did not deserve it. Azriel may not like the man that much, but he knew that if his mate were
to betray him with some other male, he would be crushed.

And he did not want to be that kind of male, that seduced someone else's mate. As hurtful as it was
for him, as lonely as he felt - as much as Azriel still desired Elain, he had to hold himself back.

Azriel didn't flinch as his fist crashed with enough force to punch a hole into the dummy. He was
too focused on trying to get somehow relaxed. He was about to launch another punch, but a small
whistle made him stop.

"Woah, someone is angry."

Gwyn.

He frowned. Why didn't his shadow let him know about her presence?

Again.

Seriously now, they had a weird habit of not letting him know when the priestess was close.

Azriel tried to get an answer from his shadows, yet they seemed to ignore him. Great, just great.

"I am sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt." She continued and he heard her steps descending back into
the house.

Azriel had no idea what came over him, but he found himself calling after her. "No, it's okay," He
finally turned to look in her direction. Perhaps some company would not hurt him.

She was half turned, her eyebrows up, surprised. Gwyn parted her lips to talk, but stopped as she
noted Azriel's bloodied hands. He felt the urge to hide his hands - she probably found them even
more hideous.

However, Gwyn didn't show any signs of disgust or repulsion. If anything, she looked...
concerned.

He braced himself for the usual questions someone would ask: what happened?; are you okay? -
the ones he desperately had been trying to avoid.

Yet Gwyn didn't say a thing - she seemed to understand he did not want to hear those questions, let
alone answer them. She walked to sit on the mattress, bringing her knees to her chest. With one
hand, she patted the spot next to her - a silent request. Azriel hesitated at first, but then walked to
sit next to her. He made sure to keep a decent distance between them.

If months ago Azriel wasn't sure what to make of him and Gwyn, he could now call her a friend -
he would not go as far as to call her an extremely close friend; but they were close enough to tease
each other a lot and have casual, somewhat open conversations.

There was something about her that he could not figure out. She somehow managed to captivate
him with her irreverence - while he'd usually get annoyed at people like this, with Gwyn, it was
different. He found it charming how she could brush past some situations with such ease, somehow
rudely, and keep demanding whatever she wanted to know.

Like that time she kept pressing whether he could sing or not.

Azriel looked at her face and noticed how her eyes were slightly red, her cheeks soaked with tears.
"Gwyn, are you okay? What happened?" Azriel asked as he suddenly started feeling restless.

She gave him a rather amused look, "Shall I ask you the same, Shadowsinger?"

The tone in her voice was enough to let him know she hated those questions as much as he did.

Azriel rubbed the back of his neck, getting a bit ashamed for asking her those things. He was about
to apologise, but was cut off as Gwyn started talking. Her chin rested on her knees, her eyes fixed
on the dummy in front of them.

"I sometimes decide not to take them," she started, her lower lip trembling. His brow furrowed, but
he let her speak, "because I feel like I can get over my fears. Because each day, I feel stronger. I
have been blessed with amazing people in my life. Each day that passes, I heal more. Yet-" Gwyn
stopped, gripping her robe tightly.

"At night, it seems like all my fears take over me. That's why I need sleeping potions, so I can
pretty much pass away and dream of nothing. But I still have moments when I feel brave enough
not to take them, feel strong enough to push away those thoughts. But it's still useless. After all
those years,"

"All the progress I feel like I made in those years - it seems like it's in vain in moments like these.
Because I still cannot escape them - those horrible memories of that night. I keep seeing my sister
beheaded right in front of me -" silent tears started running down her cheeks, "- hearing that brute's
voice as he claimed me, feeling his dirty hands all over me," Gwyn sobbed, shutting her eyes
tightly, trying to push those memories away.

The only time he had seen Gwyn this vulnerable was that night. He could still see her face, the
shock, fear, hurt. He could still feel the way she shook as he wrapped his cloak around her, how
she looked moments away from passing out.

He would never have known that he and Gwyn would cross paths again after that incident. Yet the
image of her - of the young apprentice she used to be - has followed him each day since that night.
There has not been a day in which Azriel didn't blame himself for being too late.

Had he been quicker, he would've saved the priestesses - and Gwyn would not have been through
such pain.

She was so young - only 26. And she endured more pain than anyone should have. Yet, each day,
she made progress that everyone could see. She was more comfortable, she was willing to try
living life again - like when she joined them at Nesta and Cassian's mating ceremony.

Apparently, Gwyn was still struggling - hell, she had to drug herself to sleep. Her dreams were only
of that night. She was still living in that nightmare at night.

"Am I always going to be this broken, Azriel?"

Azriel.

She rarely called him by his name.

Her question caused an inexplicable pain in his chest. He felt the urge to hug her, to soothe her in
his arms and tell her she was far from broken. That she was one of the strongest people he had ever
met. That he truly, deeply admired her and... he cared for her.

However, Gwyn did not expect an answer. It seemed like she was having a monologue, like she
needed someone to talk to, someone to just listen to her - and he'd be there for her. "I am not
unhappy. I am aware I am making progress, you all make sure to remind me of it each day. And I
feel better as time passes. But, at night, it's just..." She stopped talking and chuckled, wiping the
tears off her cheeks. "I am sorry. You probably have more important things in mind than to listen
to me crying."

Another inexplicable pain. Cauldron, why were her words hurting him so much?
There she was, strong, keeping a brave face each day when memories were still eating her up - and
he was throwing a tantrum for not having a mate.

He had never felt more ashamed.

His shadows peaked to look at Gwyn. Her eyes were still filled with tears, yet curiosity shone in
them as she saw his shadows. She smiled, softly, and held her hand out. Azriel was about to
commend his shadows to leave them alone - but they couldn't care less about what he wanted.
Some immediately moved to brush her skin, curiously. Then, they moved to her face, brushing her
tear-stained cheeks in a soothing manner.

Gwyn chuckled - a genuine one. Azriel couldn't stop himself from moving slightly closer. He was
mindful of her reaction, of any sort of discomfort, but Gwyn did not flinch. In fact, she did the
same, their shoulders pressing against each other. His wings moved a bit so that they covered both
from the cold wind.

"Gwyn, we are friends," Azriel started after a few minutes of silence. He thought long of what to
say - and even now, he was struggling. "No matter what happens - I am here for you. I am a good
listener. And I am here to listen to you, no matter what time, no matter what topic,"

Gwyn grinned, "Even if I want to talk about smutty novels?"

He didn't refrain from chuckling. "Even if you want to talk about smutty novels." Azriel grinned,
looking at her. His hand slowly moved to her face, but he halted.

Fuck.

He shouldn't try to touch her - not without her consent. No matter how innocent the gesture was,
they were not that close. And even if they were, after everything she had been through -

His thoughts were interrupted as Gwyn leaned her face closer to his hand. Her teal eyes never left
his, a small smile on her face. Azriel felt his cheeks heating, yet he brushed his fingers gently on
her face, wiping the tears away. Gwyn closed her eyes, leaning into his touch.

She started calming down... she wants you to keep doing this. She likes it.

Oh, so now his shadows were talking to him? He'd have a few words with them later.

But at the time, all his attention was on Gwyn. She trusted him enough to open up, to let
him touch her.

All the frustration, anger he had seemed to fade, something settling in him. A calming, rather
content feeling.

"Were you angry earlier because of the mate thing?"

Azriel stopped brushing her cheek with his thumb, his eyebrows slightly raised. He dropped his
hand, looking at her intensely.

How did she know about this?

Her eyes shot open, worry visible on her beautiful face. "Azriel, I am so sorry! I didn't mean to pry,
I just heard Nesta talking about it and-"

"Gwyn, it's okay." He cut her off, softly. He wasn't mad - just surprised. But perhaps he should
have expected Nesta to talk to her friends about whatever happened between him and Elain, about
his constant frustration that he was still unmated.

Shame took over Azriel. If Gwyn knew of those things, she probably saw him for who he truly was
- an unworthy man, pinning after a woman that was mated; a man that tried to steal someone's
mate-

And then Gwyn managed to catch him by surprise - for Mother knows what time. "Why are you so
obsessed with this mating bond? I mean, what's the big deal with it?"

He gaped at her. There was it, that irreverence that captivated him. If it were anyone else to have
asked this, he would be fuming by now. But Gwyn's questions just made him fall into deep
thought. He couldn't tell her he felt undeserving, unwanted - especially not after listening to her
struggles.

"Please don't tell me you are doubting your worth because you don't have a mate yet." Gwyn
murmured, tilting her head.

How did she do it? How could she read him so well?

"How-"

Gwyn chuckled. "You may be good at hiding your emotions, Shadowsinger. But there are
moments when the whole facade slips - and it's enough to let me at least guess how you truly
feel."

Azriel just stared at her. He did not stop her from taking his hand, although he slightly hissed in
pain from the cuts. "Perhaps you are too focused on it? Shouldn't this whole mate thing come
naturally?"

"It does come naturally, Gwyn."

Gwyn shrugged, "Well, then why don't you wait? Don't you think chasing it constantly won't get
you too far?" She asked, gently brushing his caloused palm with her thumb. "Maybe I do not
understand, because I've never been that keen on this whole mate thing - especially not in the last
couple of years," Gwyn added the last part in a small voice. Azriel gently squeezed her hand - not
in pity, but support; a reminder that he'd be there for her no matter what. She smiled a bit, then kept
going,

"But I think the moment you are to find your mate, you do not focus on having that bond - you
focus on that one person that you have feelings for. If it's meant to be your mate, great. And, if
not..." Gwyn trailed off a bit, then shrugged, "- so what? You are with the one you love. Bond or
no bond - this should not determine your feelings for someone."

He was at a loss for words. This woman - she never failed to surprise him. Her words hit
something deep in him that he had never been aware of. And the worst part - he could not
understand what it was.

Gwyn kept talking, not offended or affected in any way by his silence. "Perhaps one day I am going
to leave the library. Maybe one day I will be ready to go out, to meet a man - maybe I will find my
mate at a certain point, but I genuinely don't care. I want someone to love and that person to love
me back. I want mutual trust, respect, comfort... and those can be achieved without a bond."

Hearing Gwyn consider leaving the library one day - it filled him with pride.
 However, for whatever reason, it felt like a punch in the gut to listen to her talk about finding
someone one day - to imagine her with a man. He shouldn't feel like this; Azriel should be happy
for her, to be prouder of her.

"You, Berdara," he started, trying to shake away the irrational thoughts he had, "are an enigma."
Azriel said with a small smile.

Gwyn raised one eyebrow at him and chuckled. "If by an enigma you mean extremely wise, then
yes, you are right." Both laughed.

And damn him, her laugh was the prettiest he had ever heard - it was like a symphony he could
listen to for hours.

Gwyn gave him a soft smile, "Azriel, you are an amazing man. Never doubt yourself because of
some bond." Before Azriel had time to react, the priestess kissed his cheek.

His eyes widened. Her lips barely touched his skin, yet he had never felt this overwhelming
emotion before after any kind of kiss.

Gwyn got up, still holding his hand. She tugged on it a bit and Azriel got the message. Although he
was still too stunned because of that kiss, he got up, his eyes never leaving her face.

"Come, Shadowsinger."

He frowned, confused. "Where?"

Gwyn pulled Azriel behind her into the house, "To clean those cuts and help with healing. "

A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. "I think I learned how to take care of myself in five
hundred years, Gwyneth."

"I bet," she scoffed, "I have to make sure you truly and properly take care of them. I don't want you
missing tomorrow at training."

His eyebrows shot up in surprise and amusement. "Oh? Because of some cuts?" Azriel grinned.
"Tell me the truth, Berdara: are you going to miss me if I don't show up tomorrow?" He teased
mischievously.

"No," Gwyn said without holding back with her usual irreverence, "But I don't want to train with
Cassian - don't get me wrong, he is great, but we all know he focuses only on one person there and
barely pays attention to me or Emerie." She threw him a wicked grin that made him chuckle. "Plus,
I need someone to talk to about a smutty novel I just finished - and it seems like Cauldron wanted
me to find you and tell you all about it."

Azriel's lips parted and he was about to complain, "You promised!" Gwyn pointed out.

The Shadowsinger rolled his eyes but laughed. "Whatever you wish, Gwyn." He said, sincerely,
and squeezed her hand tightly in his.

A silent reasurance, an unbrekable promise.

No matter what, he would be there for Gwyn.

Chapter End Notes

I genuinely need something like this to happen between them, I am not going to lie.

Also, heads up that if I am going missing for the next 2-3 weeks it's because of my
exams. I will try to update at least once a week (maybe even two if I have enough
time), but I have many essays to write and turn in *yay University life* so I cannot
promise anything.
Please excuse any existing mistakes, but I've only slept 2 hours last night and I've
genuinely wanted to write this for so long that I could not wait ahh. But I will take my
time to edit out the mistakes soon.
Thank you for all your love and support. Each comment and kudos motivates me to
keep going. You're the nicest!
 Sore Shoulder
Chapter Summary

Gwyn managed to hurt the back of her shoulder pretty badly - and Azriel, her loving
mate, is far from happy to find out about it.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Gwyn winced in pain as she found herself knocked to the ground; she didn't know whether it was
from the punch Emerie landed in her stomach or from the horrible pain from her shoulder.

"That was unexpected," Nesta commented as she and Cassian watched the two Valkyries.

"Indeed," Cassian agreed, as Emerie helped Gwyn back on her feet. "What's wrong with you?"

Gwyn groaned, her hand moving to the back of her shoulder. She gently touched the sore area and
slightly flinched. "Nothing," she muttered, annoyed.

Emerie grinned a bit, clearly proud to have beaten Gwyn for the first time in years. "Don't tell me
you miss Azriel so much that you cannot focus." She teased. Nesta chuckled as Gwyn glared at the
Illyrian female. "Seriously now, what happened?"

"Nothing happened, what cannot you understand?!" She snapped, her face contorted in pain. Gwyn
noted her friend's worried looks, but decided to ignore them; so she turned on her heels and walked
to the water station. Her shoulder was burning and she was moments away from crying.

Cassian watched her carefully, tilting his head to the side. "All three of you excel at something. For
you, it's hand-to-hand combat. You never lost a match, Gwyn," Cassian started, following Gwyn to
the water station, "and now Emerie, who is the weakest out of all three of you at hand-to-hand
combat, managed to knock you on your ass in under a minute."

"Hey!" Emerie shouted, offended. Gwyn would laugh at other circumstances, but she could not
now.

"No offence."

Emerie let out an annoyed huff, but did not reply.

Gwyn felt her cheeks warming, yet she did not dare turn to face Cassian. What could she tell him?
That she hurt her shoulder? He'd probably laugh in her face if he heard how she managed to get it
so sore.

"Fine," Cassian turned his back to her, then started talking to Emerie and Nesta, "Then, ladies,
tomorrow only the three of us are going to the war-camps."

Gwyn's eyes widened and she turned on her heels quickly, ignoring the aching of her shoulder.
"You wouldn't leave without me!"
Years ago, the thought of going there terrified Gwyn - but now, when she knew nothing would
happen to her, that she was useful there, she enjoyed those trips. Plus, not all Illyrians were pricks.
Some were actually civilised and nice to them.

Cassian didn't bother sparing her a glance as he walked to put away the weapons, "You refuse to
tell us what happened. You've clearly hurt yourself. Do you think I am going to risk and take you
with us?"

"I can take care of myself!" She complained, looking at Nesta, a silent request in her teal eyes.
Nesta shrugged, glancing at Cassian.

"He's right, Gwyn."

Gwyn rolled her eyes and groaned. "I am coming." She firmly stated, turning back to the station,
her hands trembling from anger. Perhaps her friends were right, yet Gwyn was too stubborn. It was
just a sore shoulder; in the worst case the pain would go away in a couple of days and -

"You do realise that Azriel is never going to let you come with us when you're hurt, right?"

Gwyneth bit her lip at the mention of her mate. He has been gone for the past couple of weeks and
she missed him a lot. She knew he was fine, but the constant fear that something may happen to
him ate her up.

"Azriel is still gone - plus, he doesn't need to know." Gwyn shrugged as she sipped from her water.
Yet, she stopped at the sudden warmth that took over her - a familiar feeling, like a tug at her heart.
Her anxiety seemed to ease, sudden calmness taking over her.

Nobody said a word and Gwyn bit down her lip. Could this be -

Cassian cleared his throat, "Gwyneth," his tone made Gwyn turn around quickly.

She wasn't sure what took her more by surprise; the stick thrown in her direction to catch - which
she miserably failed to do - or the sight of Azriel standing right next to Cassian, shadows swirling
around him.

How much did he hear from their conversation?

Given how set his jaw was, the way his hazel eyes pierced her - he probably heard most of it.

"Well, we are heading to lunch. See ya later," Emerie said, awkwardly. Nesta and Cassian
muttered something, then all headed back into the house, leaving Gwyn and Azriel alone.

She looked around, doing everything to avoid his gaze. He did not say a word either, just watched
her. Gwyn cringed at the odd silence. "Shadowsinger, you are back!"

Azriel raised his eyebrows high in amusement, crossing his muscular arms over his chest. "You
don't sound too enthusiastic." He teased as he made his way to her.

"It's not that. I'm just surprised. I thought you'd be back next week."

"I'm hurt, my own mate could not sense my presence from the moment I got into the house."

Gwyn rolled her eyes at this, "I had a feeling you were back, but we both know your shadows do a
good job at hiding your scent even around me." She shot back. Gwyn knew very well that he made
his shadows do this on purpose so he could listen to her and Cassian arguing.
Azriel shrugged and stopped inches away from her. He looked at her, expectingly. His shadows
moved to embrace Gwyn, some grazing the exposed skin of her neck, others brushing through her
thick, copper hair.

"You heard everything, didn't you?"

The Shadowsinger grinned, amused by her flustered look. "Perhaps." He looked at her from head
to toe, raising his eyebrow as he pointed to the stick at her feet, "Quite impressive how you missed
catching it." Azriel teased, earning a small punch at his side from Gwyn.

She closed her eyes at the pain that shot through her. Damn it.

"What happened, Berdara?" She opened her mouth to answer, yet Azriel cut her off with a small
frown, "And don't try to lie to me. Because not only can I see you're in pain, but don't forget I can
also feel when you are hurt through the bond."

She did not take this into consideration.

Gwyn sighed, tilting her head back. It wasn't that she wanted to lie to him. She just didn't want him
to worry about her when it wasn't that bad. "I hurt my shoulder yesterday."

"How?"

"I was looking for some books for Merrill and -" Gwyn stopped, cringing, "I may have fallen off
the ladder and the back of my shoulder hit the edge of the table quite hard..."

Gwyn barely had time to react as Azriel soon hoisted her up. She yelped, surprised. Azriel muttered
something under his breath, his strong hand holding the back of her thighs firmly as she dangled
over his shoulder. His wings were pulled back so he could carry Gwyn like that.

"You know, I can walk on my own," she pointed out, slightly angling her head. Gwyn didn't have
to look at him to know he was most likely rolling his eyes.

She was tempted to reach for his wing and touch it, but she held back. Either she'd caress that one
spot that drove him to his knees, or the one that would make him want to rip her throat for daring to
touch it. While Gwyn was not worried Azriel would ever hurt her, she didn't want to make him
uncomfortable.

So Gwyn decided to pinch his butt as he made his way to their room. Azriel did not flinch, which
only made Gwyn repeat the action a couple of times, hoping he'd put her down. Yet she did not get
the desired result. Instead, Gwyn squealed in surprise as he slapped her butt once, not hard enough
to hurt, but sufficient to leave a slight stinging feeling.

"I don't mind slapping your ass over and over, Berdara. So keep going if you wish." Azriel taunted,
patting her backside, then turned his head to press a small kiss against the side of it.

"Asshole," Gwyn murmured, yet she stopped pinching his butt and let him carry her to their room.

Azriel finally put her down in the centre of their spacious room. "Will you show me your
shoulder?"

"Why? Azriel, for real, it's not-"

"Gwyneth Berdara." Azriel warned, his tone leaving no possibility of further arguing.
She rolled her eyes and turned her back to his mate, then stripped off her leather jacket. Left in a
sports bra Nesta gave her, Gwyn hesitated, before moving her hair over her shoulder to expose her
skin. She heard Azriel's faint gasp.

"Fucking hell, Gwyn," He took a step closer, "From what height did you fall?!"

Gwyn sighed a bit. She didn't dare look at her bruised skin this morning, because she had seen the
way it looked last night - and it looked horrible. "It's not that bad. I am probably going to heal by
tomo - OUCH!" She cried when Azriel brushed his scarred fingers over her bruise, barely adding
pressure.

Okay, perhaps it was that bad.

"Not that bad my ass," Azriel groaned, "Gwyn, did you even try to take care of it?" Her silence was
enough of an answer for Azriel. He sighed and gently pushed Gwyn to their bed. She laid down on
her stomach.

"Azriel, I am fine. I want to go tomorrow with Cassian, Emerie and Nesta." She turned her head to
look at him, her eyes pleading. "Please."

He looked at her, then at the bruised skin of her shoulder. He did not answer her as he walked to
grab whatever he needed to help with easing the pain. Gwyn groaned, realising pleading would be
useless. She buried her head into the bed, annoyed. She knew her friends and her mate were just
looking out for her, but that did not stop Gwyn from getting irritated. She was a grown woman, she
was a Valkyrie, she could make her own choices. She was not some child that didn't know what
was wrong or right, that needed to be told what to do.

She gripped the sheets as Azriel moved on top of her. He tugged slightly on her sports bra, a silent
question there. Gwyn didn't answer, yet she shifted a bit to take it off. Azriel's scarred fingers soon
started brushing against the back of her shoulder, spreading something cold on it. Gwyn shivered,
closing her eyes tightly because of the pain.

"We can go after your shoulder is healed, Gwyn." Azriel murmured.

She opened her eyes, surprised at his words. Azriel rarely joined them to the war-camps; and while
he made his dislike towards Gwyn going there very clear, he never held her back from doing what
she wanted to. Yet, his hatred for his kind never faded, and Gwyn never tried to pressure him,
knowing very well why he hated Illyrians.

Gwyn turned her head to look at him, "Are you sure, Az? We don't have to..."

Azriel shrugged as he took care of her shoulder, the pain easing surprisingly. "Why do you think I
came back earlier?"

It took Gwyn a moment to understand, then her face softened. He came to join them - her - there.
He wanted to be with her, despite his hostility towards Illyrians.

"But for now, you need to rest. That means no more training, and no more going to the library to
do your work until you are completely healed."

Gwyn gaped at him, her lips parted. "You cannot be serious."

"When am I not serious, Berdara?" He grinned, mischeviously.

"But Merrill-"
 His eyes darkened, "I'd like to see her try - no, dare - do something to you," Azriel growled,
protectively. Gwyn rolled her eyes but sighed, defeated. Azriel smoothly rolled Gwyn on her back,
straddling her stomach.

Gwyn pouted, complaining, "And what am I supposed to do until then?"

His eyebrows shot up and a grin spread on his handsome face. "Well, I can think of a few things
you - we - can do," Azriel murmured, leaning over her body, his lips brushing hers, his eyes
burning with desire.

Gwyn bit down her lip as she could feel his hardness against her stomach. Yet, the priestess tsked,
placing a hand over his mouth, "Too bad I have to rest. Remember, Shadowsinger?" She grinned.

Azriel's eyes widened and he groaned as he started pulling off of her. Gwyn laughed and reached
for his face, pulling him back on top of her. "But perhaps I can rest later." With that, Gwyn
smashed her lips against Azriel's, both sharing a heated kiss, pouring all their need in it.

Chapter End Notes

I have no idea what to say about this, haha. I liked it at first, but now I am not so sure
of it? Anyway, I wrote it, so who am I not to post another Gwynriel one shot?
Also, I managed to organise my exams schedule and, surprisingly, I have more free
time than I had expected. Which means I can keep updating regularly.
Thanks for all the love and support, and sorry for the existing mistakes.
 Solstice Gifts
Chapter Summary

Solstice night finds Azriel and Gwyn together - only that this year, Azriel has a gift
destined exclusively for Gwyn; and he is not the only one prepared with a gift.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Azriel took a deep breath as he strode out of the House. He stopped, his eyes fixed on the other
person there.

Just like the previous year, Azriel found himself in the company of the young priestess. Only that
things were slightly different this time - Azriel did not come there to calm down after the fiasco
that happened with Elain and Rhys; he did not find Gwyn on accident in the training ring.

Azriel was looking for Gwyn, he wanted to see her.

Gwyn seemed oblivious to his presence. Unlike last year, she was not trying to cut any ribbon or
even train. Her head was thrown back, her teal eyes focused on the stars. She wore a long, pale blue
robe and her long, copper hair was braided elegantly.

Azriel didn't try to stop his small smile as he watched the fascinated look on her face.

Stunning, his shadows whispered to him - and he had to agree.

It almost pained Azriel to interrupt her. He cleared his throat and Gwyn's attention immediately
snapped to him. "Shadowsinger?"

Azriel grinned and made his way to her, "Happy Solstice, Gwyneth."

"Happy Solstice." She said, still taken aback by his presence. "How was the party?"

"All right, I guess." Azriel shrugged, "Surprisingly, Nesta barely touched any alcohol. It's Cassian
that had a bit too much wine,"

Gwyn nodded, a ghost of a smile on her beautiful face. "I guess that means they will be back
tomorrow morning." He nodded, watching her closely. He could've asked if she celebrated with
the priestesses, but he already knew the answer to that.

Nesta insisted on Gwyn and Emerie joining the Inner Circle to celebrate with them, but both
Valkyries refused - they felt like it was not their place with them. Although pretty much everyone
disagreed with the women, they respected their wish; so Nesta, Emerie and Gwyn decided on
spending the Solstice the day after together - which most likely meant Cassian and Azriel would
have to find some other place to sleep.

"I hope things went better for you this year," Gwyn said with a devilish grin. Azriel rolled his eyes
a bit, although he let out a small chuckle at her teasing - Gwyn was aware of what happened last
year between him and Elain, because he told her when he confessed he was the one to gift her the
necklace.

"Indeed." He simply said, "What are you doing here?"

Gwyn raised one eyebrow, "Am I not allowed to admire the sky, Shadowsinger?" She laughed, "I
just didn't feel like going to sleep, that's all."

Azriel nodded, yet he could tell there was something more. She seemed a bit nervous, playing with
the end of her braid. However, he decided not to press Gwyn on what worried her.

"What are you doing here?"

"Shall I give you the same answer, Berdara?" Azriel taunted, then went on, "Well, I was looking
for you."

Gwyn's eyes widened a bit as the words left his mouth. She parted her lips to say something, but
stopped. Azriel chuckled, taking a step closer. "Did I just make Gwyneth Berdara not know what
to say?"

The priestess stared at him baffled, "Why were you looking for me?"

Azriel gave her a crooked smile, "I have something for you." He could feel his cheeks heating, yet
he tried to ignore it. He reached for something in one of his jacket's pockets, then pulled out a slim,
medium-sized velvety box. On top of it was tied a white ribbon.

Gwyn eyed the box, biting her lower lip. "Another rejected gift?" She asked in a serious tone,
though her amused gaze told him she was just messing with him. Well, he did deserve it, but it
didn't stop Azriel from rolling his eyes. Gwyn chuckled and took a step closer, "I am joking,
Shadowsinger. You know very well how much I cherish the necklace - no matter the
circumstances it was given to me." To prove her point, the priestess placed a hand over the
necklace that rested beneath her robe.

Indeed, she reacted better than Azriel had expected when he told her the whole truth about the
necklace. He thought she'd stop talking to him, that she'd lose the trust she had in him. But Gwyn
didn't seem bothered at all - in fact, she thanked him for the honesty.

However, that did not stop Gwyn from teasing Azriel every chance she's got - like she was doing
now.

"I saw it yesterday when I was looking for gifts and immediately thought of you," he confessed,
rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.

Gwyn's face softened, "You didn't have to." She whispered while taking the box from his hand. He
noted how shaky her hands were as she struggled to untie the ribbon. Azriel immediately thought
of last year, of how she was struggling with another kind of ribbon then.

She finally managed to untie it. Gwyn glanced at Azriel before opening her box. She gasped, her
eyes widening as she saw what was inside. He started fidgeting, surprisingly nervous - what if
Gwyn didn't like the gift? Was it too much? Was it appropriate for him to get her -

"Azriel, I-" Gwyn interrupted his thoughts, speaking in the softest tone he had ever heard, "it's
beautiful, but - "

Azriel snorted, "Don't tell me that you're going to reject my gift as well."
She gave him a shy smile, "I cannot accept it, it's too much." She looked down, "I don't deserve
something as beautiful as this."

He gaped at her, unsure what to tell her - no, unsure how to tell her how wrong she was; that she
deserved so much more than what he got her. If he had to, he would tell her this over and over
again, until she stopped doubting her worth.

She's just like you...

Azriel bit the inside of his cheeks at his shadows' whispers. They were right. Seeing Gwyn now,
listening to her words - she was struggling as much as he was with self-image. The only difference
was that Gwyn was truly pure, that she had no reason to think of herself as undeserving.

She was kind, good, fierce - while he was damned, just a bastard.

Azriel pushed the thoughts back. That was not the right moment for self-pity. He had to be there
for Gwyn.

He held out his hand, raising one eyebrow at her. Gwyn glanced at his hand, then at his face. She
hesitated, avoiding his gaze, and his heart stopped for a moment. He probably overstepped her
boundaries. He had touched her before, but only when they were training, to help her correct her
posture - this was different. It was more intimate, and Azriel shouldn't have dared.

Azriel was about to apologise, but Gwyn moved her right hand to his, her cheeks flushed. Azriel
tried to stop his own blush as he felt Gwyn's soft skin on top of his calloused palm. With his other
hand, he grabbed the gift he got her, carefully putting it on.

Azriel held Gwyn's wrist gently, admiring the way the jewel looked on her. He smiled a bit, his
thumb brushing her skin. When he saw that bracelet the previous day, the first thing that came to
his mind was the colour of her eyes - the bracelet had numerous teal gems, shining just like her
eyes were at that exact moment.

"There's no other person more deserving of it than you, Gwyn." Azriel said gently, bringing her
wrist to his lips. He lightly kissed her soft skin, his hazel eyes moving to look at her face. Gwyn
was staring at him, tears threatening to fall.

To his surprise, she did not pull her hand away from his. "Thank you, Azriel. Truly, the gifts
you've given me - they're the most beautiful things I own." She smiled at him, and something in
Azriel's chest sparked at her words.

He would make sure to gift her more things from now on; because the look on her face, the utter
happiness, the way her teal eyes sparkled - this was the most mesmerising sight Azriel ever had the
honour of witnessing.

"I also have something for you," Gwyn smiled, timidly, and took a step back. He raised his
eyebrows, astonished.

Is Gwyn ever going to stop surprising him?

Azriel watched as she walked to the other side of the ring, then returned with a long, slim box in
her hands. "You didn't have to, Gwyn." Azriel muttered as he hesitantly took it from her hands.

Gwyn shrugged a bit, holding onto her pale robe, "I wanted to. Now open it!" She hurried him.
Azriel's lips twitched slightly at her impatience, then opened the box. He wasn't sure what to
expect - but it clearly wasn't that.
 "A dagger?" He slowly pulled the long, sharp weapon from the box, studying it in the moonlight.
Where the hell did she get it from? He was tempted to ask, but decided it would be best to hold
back for now.

"I thought the ones you're sleeping with under your pillow wouldn't mind some company," Gwyn
joked. Azriel smiled and shook his head. He had to be honest, he was sincerely impressed with the
choice of the dagger. It was exactly like the ones he preferred using.

"How did you know I prefer this kind of dagger?" Azriel asked in awe, glancing at Gwyn.

She grinned, clearly proud of her choice. "I just paid attention to you, Shadowsinger."

Azriel stared at her, his lips parted - now he was certain that the young priestess was never going to
stop surprising him. His shadows started whispering different things to him, but Azriel could hear
none of them. Because all his focus was on the female in front of him, who was grinning at him
widely. He never thought people were paying too much attention to him, other than his brothers;
he never found himself worthy enough to be observed, in fact.

But Gwyn - she took her time to note his preference, she paid attention to him. And the thought of
it made Azriel's legs shake a bit.

"Do you like it?" Gwyn asked nervously, probably interpreting his silence the wrong way.

Azriel gave her one of his rare full smiles, "I love it, Gwyneth. Thank you."

His shadows moved from his shoulders and reached for Gwyn. She smiled as they grazed her
cheeks and neck. He watched in admiration as Gwyn tried to touch his shadows, following their
movements as they wrapped around her outstretched hand.

"So, um, the House wanted me to have some cake, but I didn't exactly feel like eating alone -"
Gwyn stopped to look back at Azriel, blushing, "Would you mind joining me? You don't have to,
of co-"

Azriel cut her off with a soft chuckle, "It would be my pleasure, Berdara." Azriel put the dagger
back in the box as Gwyn walked next to him. Without hesitation, she linked their arms and pulled
him with her back into the House.

Gwyn quietly started singing. He recognised the melody - it was an ancient song that he would
sometimes sing when he was alone. Yet, Azriel found himself joining her. Gwyn looked at him,
then her smile widened. He smiled back as they quietly sang, his shadows wrapping around their
linked arms.

And they sang back to them.

Chapter End Notes

Okay but last night I had a dream about this exact moment, so as soon as I woke up I
JUMPED to my iPad and started writing

I will never stop fangirling over fluffy Gwynriel moments, I swear.

 Broken Trust
Chapter Summary

Gwyn hears a discussion between Azriel and Elain that she shouldn't have. And this
only leads to her doubting Azriel's true intentions with her.

Chapter Notes

I wanted to postpone this chapter as much as I could, but I haven't been in the best
mood for the past couple of days, so this was the only chapter I felt like writing.

So, if you are not a fan of hurt/drama trope, then I recommend skipping this chapter. :)

Tears clouded Gwyn's vision as she tried to make her way back to the library without slamming
against a wall.

She shouldn't have followed Azriel. She should've minded her damn business. Because not only
had she pried and listened to a private talk, but what she had heard -

But how could she not? How could she not follow him when they were about to kiss - when he
held her face in one of his beautiful, scarred hands; when she could feel his hot breath against her
lips?

She wanted him to kiss her. So bad.

But he suddenly stopped. She had no idea why, but it seemed like Azriel froze in place. And before
she had time to ask what happened, he left her standing in the middle of the training ring, flushed.

No explanation, nothing.

Perhaps she should've let it go. But she felt guilty - she wanted to see what was wrong. So she
followed him.

Only to hear him and Elain talk - or argue, she wasn't sure what she could make out of their talk.

She later found out, however.

The rational part in her screamed to turn around and leave. Gwyn had no right to stay there; but she
couldn't move. Especially not when she heard what they were talking about.

She and Elain have met before, at Cassian and Nesta's mating ceremony, but other than the
formalities, they never truly got a chance to talk. But as the middle Archeron sister came to spend
some time with Nesta for a couple of days at the House of Wind, Gwyn and Elain had a proper
discussion. She could see why everyone loved Elain - she was such a sweet person. However,
Gwyn noted how Elain would occasionally drift her eyes to the necklace that rested on top of
Gwyn's chest. The beautiful woman did not say a word about it, however.
Gwyn rarely wore it, but she felt like doing it that day. She was not a fool, and from the moment
Clotho had given her the necklace, Gwyn realised from who it was.

A friend of yours left this for you.

What other friend could've been? Her sisters, nor Cassian, would've kept it a secret - they would've
given her the gift directly.

Azriel was the only one that could've given it to her, that wouldn't want her to know it was from
him. So, of course, Gwyn asked him a little after the Rite why he got her the necklace. He told her
he thought of her and that it would make her happy.

Only that Azriel missed a very important detail - one detail that she, accidentally, heard Elain and
Azriel talk about.

"Does Gwyn know," A small pause, then Elain continued, "that the necklace is from you?"

Gwyn frowned as she listened. This was wrong, she shouldn't be doing it. But - how did Elain know
it was from Azriel?

"She does. She figured it out," Azriel answered, calmly.

She heard Elain sigh, "And does she know the whole truth, Azriel?"

What was Elain talking about?

Silence. Elain gasped, loudly, "How could you, Azriel?" Her voice rose a bit. "How could you not
tell her?!"

Azriel sighed, clearly exasperated. "Keep it down, Elain," he started and she could hear the tension
in his voice, "I did not want her to get upset, that's all."

Gwyn could not understand. What were they talking about? What was the whole truth - and why
would she get upset?

She felt something in her chest, anxiety taking over her. There was something Azriel kept from her.
And Elain... she knew what it was.

Elain's laugh filled the room, although it was far from an amused one. "Oh, so telling her a lie was
better?"

"I did not lie to her, Elain."

"Really?!" She could tell Elain was getting angrier, "Then miss out on a very important detail, if
that's what you want to call it."

It was Azriel's time to groan, annoyed, yet Elain kept going. "Azriel, Gwyn does not deserve it - to
have the whole truth kept from her. She is an amazing person."

"How was I supposed to tell her that the necklace was not for her and it was for you, Elain?!" He
almost shouted, and Gwyn's blood went cold.

No.
"It would've been the right thing to do!" She matched his tone.

"What was the point, anyway?! You gave it back and I - I wanted her to have it. I wanted her to be
happy."

They fell quiet for a couple of moments and Gwyn realised she had been holding her breath. Her
tears were stinging her eyes and she did her best to hold them back.

"Azriel," Elain's voice came out soft, yet determined, "It's not fair to play with her heart, so be
honest," another pause and Gwyn felt like she would pass out at any moment now, "do you still
want me?"

Gwyn did not wait to hear his answer. She did not want to know. She shouldn't have stayed, she
shouldn't have followed him.

She turned on her heels and fled to the library, breaking down in tears.

Azriel had told Gwyn he got the necklace for her to make her happy. He made her believe he
thought of her when buying the necklace. And damn her for believing she was special in his eyes.

He lied to her. He did not have the decency to be honest, to tell her from the beginning he gave her
the necklace after Elain refused it. That the beautiful, middle Archeron sister was the one he
thought of when he saw the elegant, glass rose - not her.

It did not upset Gwyn that the necklace got to her after Elain rejected it. What broke her heart was
that he hadn't been fully honest with her. Because he knew damn well what she meant when she
confronted him about the necklace - and Azriel decided to let her believe she came first to him.

Stupid. She was so stupid. They weren't even close then, how could she even believe he'd get her a
gift?

It would've been nice - really nice, though - for him to also feel something for her, to feel the same
way she did.

But what was Gwyn for him? What did he feel for her? Because, after the Solstice, he got slightly
closer to her - and their relationship only evolved after she returned from the Blood Rite.

Hell, he was about to kiss her earlier.

Was she just a rebound? Was she someone Azriel ran to because he got rejected by the women he
truly desired?

The thought only made Gwyn's stomach turn. She had to stop and lean against a wall, afraid her
legs would give up on her. She closed her eyes and let out a loud sob, not caring who heard her.

"Gwyneth..."

Gwyn didn't flinch at the sound of her name, nor did she bother wiping the tears away. She turned
around, her eyes pinning the person in front of her. Azriel stared at her, his eyes wide in terror. She
could see the guilt on his face, the way he held a hand out, then let it down.

He knew she heard everything.

"Gwyn, I-"
"Do not dare," she snarled. Gwyn took a step closer, "Why do you think the truth would've upset
me, Azriel?" Gwyn did not give him a chance to answer. It was her time to vent, "There was
nothing between us when you gave me that necklace. Nothing when I asked you why you got me
the necklace - not gave me, but got me the necklace." Gwyn stood in front of him and poked his
chest hard.

"You LIED to me! You made me believe you thought of me when you saw this damned necklace -
that I was the one in your mind when you bought something as beautiful as this! You made me
allow my thoughts to take me as far as to think you felt the same way I felt for you!" Tears kept
running down her cheeks, yet the pain in her voice was quickly replaced by anger.

Azriel opened his mouth to speak, but halted as Gwyn mentioned the way she felt for him. She
laughed, shaking her head. She was not going to hold back, "Yes, Shadowsinger, I felt something
for you - and I still do! After we talked about the necklace, I truly believed you liked me - more
than a friend. And if until then what I felt for you could've passed as a harmless crush, then guess
what? My feelings grew for you,"

"But how could I not feel something for you? You saved me, Azriel. Not once have you made me
feel uncomfortable. You never looked at me with pity; only with encouragement and pride. And
after the Solstice, after the Blood Rite - I thought your feelings for me were getting as strong as
mine were for you," Gwyn closed her eyes and gripped his shirt, tightly, "Tonight, when you were
about to kiss me..." she stopped, unable to speak anymore.

Silence fell and Azriel waited for her to keep going. Yet, she did not. She knew that if she
continued she'd break down. So Azriel decided to finally talk, "Gwyn, I swear, not once were my
intentions to hurt you. What I told Elain - I meant it. After she returned it, I immediately thought of
giving the necklace to you. I thought of the way your eyes would sparkle with joy at the sight of
the necklace. I never wanted to take credit for giving you the necklace, that's why I've asked
Clotho not to tell you from who it was,"

"When you told me you knew it was from me, when you asked me why I got it for you - I wanted
to admit. Yet, I didn't want you to get upset, didn't want to see the gleam in your eyes disappear;
this is why I held back from admitting I initially got the necklace for Elain," he stopped to take a
deep breath, "When I think of you, of your smile, I feel a spark in my chest. Gwyn, I know I feel
something for you - something more than what I would feel for a friend..."

Gwyn looked up at him, her teal eyes full of tears, "If you lied to me over something as
insignificant as a necklace, how can I trust your words now, Azriel?"

He gaped at her in awe, "Gwyn, I - "

"You said you didn't tell me the truth because you didn't want to upset me," Gwyn started, taking a
step back from him, "how can I know if your feelings are genuine, when you can simply lie so that
you won't get me upset that you don't feel the same way?"

Azriel froze at her words, his brow furrowed. "Gwyneth, I would never lie about my feelings,
especially not about my feelings for you."

"I cannot know that now, can I?" Gwyn frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, "How can I
be sure that I am not just some rebound? That you see in me what you could not have - someone
that feels something for you, unlike Morrigan, and someone that is not bound to anyone, like
Elain? Someone -"

"Gwyn, stop!" Azriel's voice was rough. He frowned at her and Gwyn could swear she saw hurt
flashing on his face for a moment. "You would never be a rebound for me - and you've never been,
I swear! What I feel for you - it has nothing to do with my past feelings for Mor and Elain."

She closed her eyes, allowing the rest of her tears to fall down her face. "Until you figure out how
you really feel," Gwyn started, opening her eyes to look at Azriel, serious, "whatever happened
between us or was going to - we are forgetting it. Until you figure out what I truly am to you,"
Gwyn gulped, forcing the next words to come out of her mouth,

"In my eyes, you will be nothing more than the Shadowsinger and Spymaster of the Night Court,
the one that saved me from those brutes, and then trained me," her expression was grim, "You will
no longer be Azriel, my friend," Gwyn closed her eyes tightly, forcing back the sob, "Azriel, the
man I allowed myself to fall for,"

"Gwyn, please -" He started, desperately, reaching out to touch her.

However, Gwyn flinched and took a step back. He stopped dead in his tracks, mortified. "Oh my,
Gwyn, I am so sorry, I -"

She did not give him the chance to apologise for reaching out to touch her, "You've always told me
how important my choice is. That with you, I am going to make my own choices. Well, that's my
choice, Azriel."

Azriel blankly stared at her. It was like he was looking through her, like he zoned out for a
moment. Yet, he finally spoke, no emotion in his voice. "Fine. If that's what you wish, I am going
to respect it."

Gwyn nodded, taking a deep breath. With shaky hands, she pulled the necklace from her robe, then
over her head. It got stuck slightly in her hair, but Gwyn did not have the patience to deal with it, so
she yanked on the necklace hard enough so a couple of copper hairs ripped. Gwyn stared at the
necklace, then at Azriel.

"You broke my trust, Azriel," Gwyn started, letting the necklace fall between them, "and until you
are going to gain it back, I want to forget everything that ever happened between us."

She swore she saw Azriel flinch at her words, that saw his eyes getting teary. Yet, Gwyn didn't
want to know for sure if she had seen right - so she turned her back to him and left.

And as she walked into the library, Gwyn swore she heard a small sob behind her - but she didn't
turn to check on Azriel, and just closed the door behind her.
 Competition (smut)
Chapter Summary

Azriel and Gwyn compete in pretty much every aspect of their lives - especially when
it comes to who can bring the other to an orgasm first.

Chapter Notes

Um, don't ask me how from hurt I got to smut because I have no explanation, so...
enjoy? ️ ️

Also, no plot, no backstory, nothing too deep - starts with smut, focuses on smut, ends
with smut.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Gwyn peered down at Azriel with a devilish grin. She flipped her long, copper hair, and placed her
hands on his muscled chest. Gwyn leaned slightly against his chest, slowly rolling her hips.

Azriel's head fell back with a deep grunt. His fingers dug into the skin of her thighs. "You are
trouble, Berdara," he murmured with a chuckle.

She raised one of her eyebrows at him, challenging. "Am I? How, Shadowsinger?" Gwyn leaned
back, her hands moving from his strong chest to his muscular thighs. She panted in pleasure from
the new angle, yet her movements stayed slow, painfully slow - just the way she knew it drove him
crazy.

He let out another dark chuckle, ignoring her question. He then opened his eyes to stare at his
gorgeous mate - she was perfect. His gaze ran along her marvelous figure. Azriel took in the way
her full breasts softly jumped up and down with each rock of her hips. He stared at her soft sex, and
at how she expertly took all of him. He got lost at how amazing her inner walls felt around his
cock, how he filled her perfectly.

Azriel felt his cock twitch inside Gwyn, and the woman immediately grinned in triumph. "Are you
close, Shadowsinger?"

Hell yes, he was.

But Azriel was not going to give Gwyn the satisfaction of cumming before her. He bit his bottom
lip and closed his eyes for a moment. "You wish, Berdara," he groaned, stubbornly.

Gwyn just chuckled and, if she had moved unhurriedly before, now her pace was punishingly slow.
She knew what she was doing - in all those years, Gwyn learned exactly how to drive him insane.

He gritted his teeth and moved one of his hands away from her thigh, making its way to her sex.
Azriel looked at Gwyn mischievously, before his thumb gently brushed against her clit. Her eyes
shot wide, her inner walls clenching around his cock.

Just like that - two could play this game.

However, Gwyn was not having it. She pulled his hand away quickly, holding his wrist with a
strong grip. She gave him a hard stare and rose until the tip was the only part of his cock left in her
pussy.

He could've easily broken free from her grasp and pushed her hips down, yet Azriel stayed like
this, at her utter mercy. "Uh, uh - no cheating!" She scolded.

Azriel looked at her, amused. "Cheating? How so?" He asked, innocently, "All I wanted was to
make my mate feel good."

Gwyn rolled her eyes, "What a caring mate," she taunted.

Azriel just grinned at her. He knew very well how sensitive her clit was; and that, with a couple of
strokes, he would have her sweet release all over his cock - just like Gwyn could get him in
seconds to orgasm if she touched that one spot on his wings.

It was as if she had read his mind because Gwyn started leaning over him. Yet Azriel was quick
enough to sense her next move, so it was his turn to grip her wrist, her hand inches away from his
wing. He peered at her, yet Gwyn mimicked the innocent look he gave her earlier. Perhaps it was
his time to tease her.

Azriel easily pulled his hand from her grip, only to grab her hip. Within seconds, he flipped them,
so Gwyn was laying on her back with him on top, one of her hands pinned to the bed. The devilish
priestess took advantage of her free hand to brush her fingers over his wing - but Azriel did not let
her have her fun, pinning the other hand as well. His grip was soft, however, and Gwyn could've
easily pulled her hands away if she wanted to.

She did not. Instead, Gwyn stuck her bottom lip out in a pout, looking at him through her long
eyelashes. "All I wanted was to make my mate feel good," she complained, clearly mocking him.

Azriel raised his eyebrow, "Really? Because I thought the 'no cheating' rule also applied to you,
love," he shrugged and moved his hands away from hers. He looked down at his cock resting
against her stomach, then back in her eyes.

Gwyn gave him a challenging stare, "What are you waiting for?" she stopped for a moment,
smiling, "Are you afraid you'll come the moment you push your cock in me, Shadowsinger?"

Azriel groaned and moved his hips, so the tip of his cock brushed against her wet entrance.
Without warning, he pushed inside her in one mighty thrust. Gwyn's lips parted in surprise and she
moaned loudly, pushing her head against the pillow. He grinned, content, and leaned over her
body, his lips brushing her earlobe, "I was actually afraid you'd be the one to come, Berdara."

Gwyn wrapped her arms around the back of his neck, yet her fingers went to grip his hair instead of
touching his wings. He nibbled her earlobe and sucked on it as his large, scarred hands gripped her
hips. Unlike Gwyn, he moved quick and hard. If he enjoyed it when Gwyn took her time riding
him, he knew very well Gwyn loved it when he fucked her hard. And that was exactly what he was
going to do.

The loud noise of skin slapping against skin filled the room, accompanied by their loud moans. His
balls slammed against her ass, and her walls were clenching around him in a vice grip. If that was
not a sign of Gwyn approaching her orgasm, then the tremble of her body gave it away. Azriel
gripped her hips tighter and gritted his teeth. He was close too, but no way in hell he was going to
cum before her.

"You're close," Gwyn panted, her soft breasts jumping against his muscular chest.

"So are you," he muttered, his forehead resting against hers. He stared down at her teal eyes, the
smug sparkle in them replaced by utter lust. Her breath was as ragged as his, and she was clearly
holding back as well. "Come on, Gwyn, cum, my love." Azriel encouraged, a small trace of
desperation in his voice, his own body starting to shake.

Instead of answering, Gwyn took him by surprise by wrapping her long legs around him, then
rolling them over until she was on top again. She stared down at him, determined, "Not before you,
Shadowsinger." Gwyn smiled and held his hands as she rolled her hips, closing her eyes as her clit
brushed against his pelvis.

Azriel groaned as Gwyn picked up the speed. He tugged her hands slightly, lowering her body over
his until her chest was close to his face. Gwyn panted as Azriel flicked the tip of his tongue around
her peaked nipple, then took it into his mouth. He let go of her hands, one of them moving to grab
her butt, the other one caressing her other breast.

"Oh my, Azriel," Gwyn mewled, and it only encouraged him to suck harder. He gripped her butt
and started thrusting his cock in her. His mate gasped but kept moving up and down while Azriel
pounded her, meeting her thrusts, both moaning in pleasure.

Azriel pinched her nipple and tugged on it, then let it go. Gwyn gripped his hair and smashed her
lips against his. He parted his lips, letting her warm tongue push into his mouth. He swept his
tongue against hers as they passionately kissed.

He was lost in their kiss, in how perfectly her pussy felt around his cock. The pace they've built
was erratic, an incredible speed and force that was the result of a very thorough teasing.

Azriel didn't know whether it was him or Gwyn that came first, but both broke the kiss as their
releases hit them hard. Azriel groaned, his fingers digging in the soft flesh of her ass as he buried
his cock deep in her pussy, spilling in her.

Gwyn cried out as her powerful orgasm took over her. She fully fell on his chest, her body
trembling against his own.

They were breathing hard, and he held Gwyn as close to him as he could. Azriel placed a soft kiss
on top of her head, smiling, "I have no idea who came first," he admitted, throwing an arm over his
eyes.

Gwyn softly chuckled, "Me either, Azriel." She placed a kiss on his cheek, and Azriel slowly rose
her off his cock. She whined a bit, their combined orgasms dripping slightly against him. Gwyn
placed her hands on his chest, leaning against it. She looked down at his cock, then back at him.

Azriel furrowed his brow as he noticed something flashing in her eyes. Before he had time to ask
what happened, Gwyn rolled off of him. "Well then, Shadowsinger," she started, and instead of
laying on her back next to him, Gwyn rolled on her stomach, "how about we have one last round to
see who can make the other cum first?"

He gaped at her, his eyes following her movements and how she raised her hips, wiggling them
suggestively. She grinned at him, "That, of course, if I didn't already wear you out," Gwyn said,
devilish.
 Azriel would never turn down another chance to fuck Gwyn. But now, with her taunting words - in
the blink of an eye, Azriel knelt behind her. He grabbed his cock and slowly rubbed it from her clit
to her wet sex. "You're on, Berdara." Azriel grinned, and in one fast, deep thrust, he buried his cock
back in her.

Both cried out in pleasure, and Azriel didn't waste any moment to prove to his mate he was going to
make her cum first.

Chapter End Notes

For today, I had planned to write Az's POV from the last chapter, but I really didn't
feel like writing something sad - so here is his POV for a smutty chapter.

I'm still a rookie at writing smut, so I hope this wasn't very cringe? But hey, we are all
learning, right?

But Az's POV on the last chapter - it'll come one day! And the comfort part, well... I
have to think long because I honestly did not plan on writing one
️ ️ but I will, pinky swear!
 Never do this again
Chapter Summary

Gwyn goes to check on Azriel after he got hurt in one mission, only to find his room
empty - and the young priestess was not going to put up with Azriel's stubbornness.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Gwyn knocked on Azriel's door, patiently waiting for an answer. However, nothing came. She
frowned and glanced at the clock. It was barely ten, and she knew very well he wouldn't be asleep
now, even if he wanted to. Just like her, Azriel was a night owl.

She knocked one more time, yet there was, again, no response. Gwyn started growing worried.
"Azriel?" The priestess pressed her ear against the door, trying to pick on any noise that'd come
from his room.

Silence.

"Okay, that's it, I'm coming in!" She opened the door, looking over the bed. She frowned slightly
for a moment. Under the covers, it seemed like Azriel was tucked in, with the sheet over his head
as well. Oh, maybe he fell asleep.

Gwyn took a step to the bed, then stopped. His scent lingered in the room, yet... it was not as if he
was present. Then, it hit her.

Her eyes widened as she took in the odd shape, the initial worry fading into anger. She yanked the
sheet and growled at the sight of the pillows. Azriel did not just try to trick anyone coming in that
he was asleep like that.

"Azriel!" She called out loudly, although Gwyn knew where the shadowsinger was. And it only
infuriated her more.

With an annoyed huff, she dropped the sheets on the floor and turned on her heels, stomping out
his room and heading to the training ring. He was not supposed to be there; Azriel should be in his
room, resting.

A couple of days ago, Azriel left unexpectedly to the human lands on one of his missions - only
that he told nobody since Rhysand forbade Azriel to go there, because it was too dangerous. Of
course, the stubborn spymaster did not listen.

Things didn't go as smooth as Azriel would've imagined, as he ended up getting attacked. He was
quick enough to disappear and head back home, yet he ended up with a nasty, stab wound. It wasn't
life-threatening, but Majda still told Azriel to rest for at least two weeks - so no more missions, no
more training, nothing that involved physical effort.

Clearly, he didn't give a damn about what he was told to do.

His fists were slamming violently against the dummy in the centre of the ring. Gwyn leaned
against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest, her teal eyes going to the bandage wrapped
around his torso. She didn't say a word, just waited for him to realise she was there.

Gwyn knew his shadows would not alert him about her presence either, so it was only a matter of
time until he'd pick on her scent. And she could not wait to see his reaction, the way his body was
going to still and turn to her slowly in slight worry.

It happened earlier than she had expected. She watched his fist stop midway, his whole body
freezing. Gwyn heard him quietly swear under his breath, then Azriel turned his head to look at
Gwyn over his shoulder. He was trying to catch his breath, his hair sticking to his forehead. His
hazel eyes were wide, and she could see the panic in them.

Well, if that was not a sight. She would've laughed in other circumstances, had she not been this
furious.

Yet, Gwyn kept her face emotionless. She brought a hand in front of her to look at her nails,
seeming mildly disinterested. "One minute,'' the priestess started, then her teal eyes pinned his
hazel ones, "you have one minute to get back into your room,"

Azriel sighed, "Gwyn, I am fine. Plus, I've only been in here for ten minutes." He shrugged and
walked to the dummy, then started dragging it back to its spot. Gwyn groaned, annoyed, and made
her way to him. She stopped Azriel before he moved further, holding him firmly by the shoulder.

"Why are you so stubborn?!" She complained, "Majda told you to rest for at least two weeks! It's
only been five days!"

Azriel turned to face her, then rolled his eyes. He threw a hand around the dummy to lean against
it, "Gwyn, again, I am perfectly fine and-"

Gwyn's gasp stopped him from continuing. Her eyes were wide as she stared at the bandage, now
soaked in blood. His eyes followed her and he grimaced slightly. "I didn't even fe-"

"Stop talking before I punch you!" Gwyn hissed, and Azriel's eyes widened a bit. "You are so
irresponsible!" She scolded, grabbing his arm. Without waiting for a reaction, Gwyn dragged an
astonished Azriel back in the House, "First, you went against High Lord's words and left to a
mission that could've been fatal for you - do you realise they could've killed you?!" Her loud voice
echoed in the empty hallways,

"Then, you decided not to listen to Majda, who told you to rest, and went to train! And now look at
you! The wound is open again!" Gwyn was enraged as they got in his room, and then, at the sight
of his pillows, she groaned, "And you also tried to trick me with some pillows! What the hell,
Azriel? How old are you, five?!"

Gwyn finally turned to face Azriel, who was staring at her with his eyebrows high, surely at loss
for words. His cheeks were flushed as he glanced at the pillows, then back at Gwyn.

She rolled her eyes and pointed to his bed. "Sit. I am going to take care of that wound," Azriel
parted his lips to protest, but Gwyn held a finger up threateningly, so he dropped it.

The male groaned, exasperated, and walked to sit back on the bed. "I'm over five hundred, not
five," he muttered with an annoyed huff, and Gwyn stared at him.

Was this the only thing that mattered to him after everything she said - that she called him five?

"Unbelievable," the priestess shook her head in slight defeat, then ran a hand through her hair. She
made her way to his bathing room, getting everything she needed: a wet cloth, a pile of salves,
some fresh bandages, and some thread to stitch the wound. She also had her invoking stone, but it
would not be enough to heal - she had tried before and it didn't work.

Gwyn sat next to Azriel and, with shaky hands, she started unwrapping the bandage from his body.
He hissed slightly as the dried blood on his wound was stuck slightly to the bandage, but he let
Gwyn work. She didn't say another word to him as she cleaned and stitched the wound.

She was furious, and... Gwyn was also frightened - this feeling has been following Gwyn since he
came back. Because, even though Azriel was thankfully fine, Gwyn could not help but think how
many things he did and was going to do from now on that could get him killed.

What if he hadn't been quick enough and those brutes that attacked him slaughtered him? What if
his wound had turned out to be threatening and he died because of it?

Gwyn could not accept it, the thought of him dying. She loved him too much, she could not lose
him. Not like this.

"Gwyn, love," his smooth voice made Gwyn snap out of her thoughts and look at him. Only then,
when her vision got blurry, she realised she was crying. Azriel gently wiped her tears off of her
cheeks, his features softening, "I've been hurt worse than this, trust me."

She shook her head and, as Azriel cradled her against his chest, mindful of the injury, Gwyn wept
louder. "Please don't do this again," she whispered, her hot tears soaking his muscular chest, "never
leave like this, when the High Lord told you not too, when it's too dangerous to go on your own."

Azriel stood quiet for a minute, one hand rubbing down her back, then started, "Gwyn, my work
is dangerous. No matter what, there is always the chance of things going wrong, of me getting
hurt," he took a deep breath, pressing a kiss on top of her head, "I am sorry for worrying you. I
should've listened to Rhys and waited for more information from my spies before going."

It was the first time he apologised for it. Gwyn started calming down, even though the fact that
there would always be a chance of him getting injured - or even worse - was like a punch in the gut.
She was aware that being a spymaster was extremely risky, but still...

"I don't want to lose you, Azriel," Gwyn whispered and looked at him.

He raised his eyebrows slightly, "You won't, Gwyn," Azriel reassured and leaned to kiss her lips
gently. He grinned a bit and joked, "You won't get rid of me too easily, Berdara. I'm planning on
annoying you with my presence many centuries from now on."

Gwyn rolled her eyes but laughed. She pulled away from his embrace to finish bandaging his
wound, then took everything she had needed back into his bathing room. "Azriel," Gwyn started,
slowly, darting her eyes to her feet.

"Yes, Gwyn?"

"May I spend the night here?" She asked, shyly, looking back at him. They've been together for
some time, yet Gwyn had not been ready to spend the night with Azriel - not until now, when the
thoughts of losing him made her want to be as close to him as possible.

Azriel stared at her, dumbfounded, then nodded, "Yeah - of course, Gwyn." He smiled crookedly,
his cheeks flushed slightly. She crawled into his arms, hiding her head in the crook of his neck.
Gwyn smiled as she took in his scent, then started laughing. "What?"
 She propped on one elbow to look down at him, amusement gleaming in her teal eyes. "Did you
really think I would not realise that the pillows you tugged under the sheets were not you?"

Azriel smirked, "I hoped?" he closed his eyes and then laughed, "Hey, I did my best, okay?"

"Your best?" Gwyn snorted, "Azriel, the shape of the pillows had nothing to do with you - you
didn't even bother to make it seem as if there were wings, too!"

Azriel stopped laughing as he realised it. "Oh, right. I missed that." he simply said, then shrugged.

Gwyn rolled her eyes and ran her fingers down his chest, tracing his tattoos, then quietly said,
"Please, rest for the next two weeks."

"Fine," he gave in, sighing, "I will. For you."

"You're doing it for you, for your well-being." Gwyn reminded with.

Azriel rolled his eyes, but did not say a thing. Instead, he tugged Gwyn back into his embrace, "Do
you want to borrow some clothes of mine, or are you going to sleep in your priestess robe?" he
muttered with a grin.

Gwyn blushed as she realised her clothes were not exactly fitting to sleep in. She could go back to
her room and get changed into one of her nightgowns, but she didn't have enough energy. "Your
clothes are too big for me, Azriel."

"True... yet my shirts are long enough to cover you,” he kissed her forehead, gently, "Only if you
are comfortable, of course."

Gwyn thought for a moment, then pressed her body closer to him, "Maybe another time,
Shadowsinger. I am exhausted - so this robe will do." She felt him nod against her head, "I love
you, Az." Gwyn murmured and closed her eyes.

Azriel’s arms tightened around her, "I love you too, Gwyn." he whispered in her hair, and Gwyn
smiled at his words, quickly drifting to sleep in Azriel's embrace.

Chapter End Notes

I've had this idea outlined for a while, and I finally decided to work on it, because the
'one is hurt' trope is one of my favourites.

Also, this week has been a blessing for Gwynriel stans, because we got so many fan
arts - and boy, when I tell you all of them got me to my knees. Especially the one by
Dominique Wesson, which may or may not be my home screen, lock screen,
WhatsApp wallpaper, and my and my friend's group chat's icon... (because yes, my
friends know of my Gwynriel obsession and they let me have them as our GC icon - as
the iconic couple they will be).
 Right in front of him
Chapter Summary

One meaningful talk with Elain made Azriel realise he should stop focusing on the
past and look ahead. And what were the odds that, right in front of his eyes, was the
fiery priestess that has been fascinating the shadowsinger for the past months?

Chapter Notes

Before you’ll go ‘what??’ while reading the first part of the chapter, this is, of course,
a Gwynriel one shot, haha. So don’t worry, I didn’t switch the couples. I think the first
part is quite important in understanding the rest of this one shot, but hey, you can skip
it if you’d rather read Gwynriel and only Gwynriel (cannot blame you if you do, haha).

Also, I’ve had this idea written for a while, since I was binge-reading Daevastanner's
amazing fanfic some time ago. I got inspired by her view on why Elain gave the
necklace away so… I hope she won’t mind that I got inspired by her, because I
absolutely ADORED her take on it!

See the end of the chapter for more notes

The place Nesta chose for her and Cassian’s ceremony was elegant and calm, a perfect spot for the
people close to them only.

Azriel took a deep breath as he made his way further into the garden, halting for a moment,
hesitant. Perhaps this was not the best moment to talk to her, to solve the obvious unspoken
problem. Or maybe it was, because, with everyone there, enjoying the ceremony, there wouldn’t be
any risk of things getting heated by accident between him and the middle Archeron sister.

Although Azriel was not so sure things would be as intense between him and Elain as they were at
the Solstice now. He had months to reflect on his behaviour. He did not see it at first, but the
moment Azriel realised what he truly thought of her, especially that night, he felt ashamed.

Because, at the Solstice, when all he could think of was how her skin would feel against his, how
he’d kneel before her to taste her, Azriel solemnly focused on his fantasies, on his sexual needs.
Nothing more. He did not once think how Elain might feel; hell, he didn’t even care to note her
reaction to his gift – well, rejected gift.

Even when he argued with Rhysand, he admitted he did not think past pleasuring himself. He had
seen her as nothing more than someone to help him release his frustration, his deep, twisted sexual
fantasies.

And the moment Azriel realised it, he felt disgusted with himself – disgusted that he got this
desperate to put his needs over someone’s feelings, not think past one forbidden night of pleasure
with Elain.
There was still a part in Azriel that desired Elain, that believed the Cauldron made a mistake and
they were supposed to be mates, yet it was not that strong and he could finally brush past it.

The months of overworking himself – even more than before, if that was possible – helped him. He
also did his best to distance himself from Elain in any way possible. Azriel avoided her like the
plague; each time he’d sense her presence, he’d fled.

It helped that Elain did the same. She had shown no interest in being close to him anymore or any
desire to cross paths with him again.

However, Azriel thought long and hard about it, and he came to realise things were not okay. She
was, after all, family – in one way or another. He could not keep constantly running away from her,
from his problems.

They had to talk about it like adults.

And again, perhaps his brother’s mating ceremony was not the best place to do so, but Azriel could
not wait anymore, nor did he want to be alone with Elain.

He watched the middle Archeron sister stare at some flowers, seated on a bench at a decent
distance from the space that was turned into a dancefloor. She seemed in deep thought, a small
frown on her face. Azriel took one more deep breath and cleared his throat, getting the woman’s
attention.

She turned her head to look at him, and something flashed in her eyes – it seemed like shame, but
he wasn’t sure. The moment she looked at him, Azriel’s shadows, which were calmly resting on
his shoulders, skittered back in seconds. Azriel has always found this reaction of theirs odd, the
way they’d react around Elain. Yet, they never gave him an answer regarding to why they hid like
this from her, as if they were scared of her presence.

“Hello, Azriel,” she was the first one to break the awkward silence, placing her hands in her lap.

He nodded and, as he noticed Elain moving a bit on the bench to make some space for him, he
went to take the seat. He was about to talk, when something like claws started scratching at his
mind. Azriel refrained from groaning and gave Rhys access in his mind.

Yet, before the High Lord could start screaming at Azriel, the man cut him off, “ I want to
apologise for what happened between us and solve things. Relax, nothing more. I am not going
to court Elain anymore, just like I told you that night.” Azriel then closed his mental shield, not
giving Rhys time to answer or anything.

But Azriel could feel his brother's violet eyes burning them from the other side of the garden.

He sighed and looked down, his attention on Elain now, “Elain, I know things between us have
been… rough,” Azriel rubbed the back of his head, “Yet, I think it’s time we talked like adults
about it.” He stopped, turning his head to look at Elain, who was just staring at him, blankly.

“I know we should’ve discussed long ago about it, but – “ a pause, then Azriel continued, “I am
truly sorry for the way I behaved that night. I acted on my desire and I – I truly am ashamed of it.”

Elain looked down for a moment, and Azriel got worried she’d throw a tantrum. Yet, when her
eyes met his, Elain smiled – a sincere smile, not some forced, polite one. He was confused by her
reaction, but didn’t let it show, and waited for her answer.

“Azriel, it’s okay. I am not upset anymore,” she started, the soft smile on her face never fading, “I
am sorry as well. What we did was, in fact, wrong – and we would’ve both regretted it dearly
later.”

Well, indeed, but most likely for different reasons.

“I can guess why you’ve been avoiding me,” Elain sighed a bit, “my reasons were different from
yours, however.”

What could’ve been the different reasons? Was it because Elain didn’t really want him and she
came to realise how unworthy he was of her?

“I bet you wonder why I gave you back the necklace,” he did, but didn’t interrupt Elain as she kept
speaking, focusing on some flowers behind him, “After you left me, after you said it was a
mistake… I was hurt, yes. I was also ashamed and did not see what I did wrong,”

“Yet, the moment I got to my room and I touched the necklace, I-“ she stopped for a moment to
take a deep breath, “I had a vision about us,” Elain finally looked at Azriel and smiled once again,
“only that, we were with different people by our sides – and we were happy with them. And that
necklace,” Elain absently placed a hand to her chest, where the necklace would’ve been, had she
not given it back, “It was no longer in my possession, but in someone else’s.”

Azriel sucked in breath at her words. He felt his hairs raise, and a sudden shiver ran down his
spine.

The person Elain was speaking of, could it be –

Elain turned her head to look where the others were, and Azriel followed her gaze, looking right at
Lucien, who was clearly trying his best to ignore Azriel and Elain together by speaking to Feyre,
yet his eyes would dart at them occasionally.

Elain smiled, fondly, “That’s why I say it’s good we stopped… we would’ve hurt them deeply had
we went on that night and… gave in our desire.” Elain blushed a bit and sighed, “Perhaps we don’t
realise it yet, Azriel – that they are the ones for us, but… we will, eventually.”

The woman looked at him once again, “I think it’s time we stopped living in the past and looked
ahead at what is waiting for us.”

At her words, Azriel turned his head from her, looking right ahead. And instantly, his eyes fell on
the one person that, for the past couple of months, hadn’t stopped surprising him.

Gwyneth Berdara.

Azriel could not stop the anxious feeling taking over him as he approached Gwyn. Elain’s words
kept playing over and over again in his head.

Did she truly meant what she said, or was this some sort of excuse to make him feel better? Did she
really have that vision, or did she just say this to get rid of him, finally realising she was far too
good for him?

Pathetic, his shadows seemed to mock him, and Azriel frowned.

Were they really making fun of him for overthinking?

Apparently.

Gods, his shadows were bolder recently.

But why Gwyn, out of all the people – why did she hint it was her that he’d be happy with? Did
Elain see Gwyn wearing the necklace, so that made Gwyn fall prey to her excuse?

Or maybe it was someone else Elain was talking about? Perhaps Gwyn was going to give the
necklace back to him the moment she found out it had not been meant for her at first, and someone
else would come to own it?

Okay, perhaps his shadows were right – he was pathetic now.

It just didn’t make sense to him. Gwyneth Berdara – would she ever want to be with anyone after
everything she’d been through?

And most importantly, would she ever want to be with him?

No, of course not. She was, just like Elain, far too good for him. And he – he was far too broken,
he would not be able to be there for Gwyn the way she’d need, the way she deserved to have
someone, when he still could not heal from his own trauma.

Stop overthinking, Shadowsinger, his shadows tried to soothe him.

If only it were that easy… he answered with a groan, approaching Gwyn. She was left all by herself
at the table, her teal eyes focused on Nesta and Cassian, who were dancing to a slow, calming
song.

She seemed more peaceful now than the moment she arrived at the ceremony, yet Azriel could still
sense hesitation and something holding her back from being the joyful woman he came to know in
the past few months.

In fact, Azriel had never seen Gwyn this quiet.

He paid close attention to her now, still restless because of Elain’s words. Azriel never admitted to
himself this, but Gwyn was a striking woman – not because he didn’t want to admit it, it was just
that Azriel would never focus on her beauty, but on her courage and determination, which he
thoroughly admired.

And now, it was hard not to acknowledge how stunning she was. Her copper hair fell down her
back, with a couple of front strands clipped back. She wore a modest, turquoise dress that brought
up the colour of her teal eyes more. It was long and didn’t show any kind of cleavage, with thin
straps that rested on her fine, freckled shoulders. However, she had thrown over a long, silk,
matching scarf that covered her arms, and most likely kept her from getting too cold.

Azriel blushed the moment he realised he was staring at Gwyn, especially when she was not aware
of it.

Or at least that’s what he thought, because in seconds, Gwyn’s head turned to his direction. She
looked at him blankly for a moment, and Azriel was ashamed she caught him staring. She must be
thinking the worst now, and he was about to apologise.

But Gwyn’s broad grin made him stop from talking. “You know, Shadowsinger,” she started,
mischievousness gleaming in her light eyes, “you can take a seat next to me if you want to. I won’t
bite, I promise.”
Azriel’s eyebrows rose in amusement. He chuckled softly and went to take one of the vacant seats,
right next to her, mindful of his wings – and to keep a decent distance between them.

Gwyn’s attention was back on Nesta and Cassian, and she watched them fascinated. Azriel didn’t
even realise that he started smiling at the look on her face.

“When I was younger,” Gwyn started, absently, still staring at the recently mated couple, “my
sister and I would sneak out at night and pretend we’d attend a ball,” a ghost of a smile played on
her full lips, “we were big fans of romance novels – like Pride and Prejudice, or War and Peace.”

Azriel heard of those novels – from the human lands. He was slightly surprised Gwyn and her
sister had access to them, but he had to remember the libraries in temples were vast and many also
had books from the human realm.

“We would switch roles – one night I was the man, the other it was her – and pretend to attend as a
pair,” Gwyn closed her eyes at the memory and chuckled, “I was usually the one to sing quietly,
and we would dance for a long, long time together, trying to follow how dances were described in
novels,”

“Only that, as gracious as dancing was presented, we – we had two left feet.” Gwyn laughed a bit,
and Azriel joined, unable to stop himself from picturing a young Gwyn with her sister, both
chuckling uncontrollably as they tried to dance. “So either I stepped on her foot, or she stepped on
mine – sometimes we’d step on each other’s feet at the same time, which would lead to us falling,”

Gwyn’s amusement seemed to disappear for a moment as she said in a serious tone, looking at him,
“Of course, we would fall extremely gracious, like two young ladies.” Then, she grinned widely
and Azriel chuckled louder.

Gwyn’s attention drifted back to the dancefloor, and her smile faded. “I miss her a lot,” she
whispered, and Azriel could see her eyes getting teary.

Oh, no. He was the worst when it came to dealing with emotions. What could he do? He knew
saying sorry was the worst thing he could say – Gwyn would never want anyone’s pity. A hug
would be too much, and she’d probably be as uncomfortable with any physical contact as he was.

Then, Azriel did the first thing that came to mind - changing the subject. “I am shocked to hear
this,” her attention was on him, the sorrow replaced by curiosity, “that Gwyneth Berdara, the first
to cut the ribbon, the one that revived the Valkyries, that recently became a Carynthian –“ he
paused and grinned a bit, “ – is a bad dancer.”

Gwyn stared for a moment, then laughed, her head falling back. There, this was better.

“We can’t excel at everything, can we, Shadowsinger?”

Azriel smiled a bit, then froze at her next question, “What about you – are you a good dancer?”
Before Azriel had time to answer, Gwyn continued, irreverently, “I bet you are. After all, you’re
really old.”

Well, he did not expect her to say that. His brow furrowed a bit; he wasn’t sure whether it was
confusion or amusement that he felt.

“Stating the obvious, I see,” he muttered, shaking his head. “But why I being old means I am a
good dancer?”

Gwyn played with the elegant scarf and shrugged. “I don’t know, you’ve had centuries to
practice.”

“Cassian is only a couple years younger than I,” he pointed at Cassian, “and you can see what an
amazing dancer he is,” his voice was filled with sarcasm, as he watched his brother stumble over
the simplest steps.

Gwyn did not laugh at his joke, but stared at Cassian intensely, “Cassian does not seem the type to
enjoy this kind of dancing, but… um, other types,” she did not have to elaborate for Azriel to
understand what she meant – and he had to give her that.

The type of dancing his brother would be good at before meeting Nesta involved grinding against
random women in clubs – which couldn’t exactly be counted as real dancing.

“You, on the other hand,” Gwyn’s eyes drifted to Azriel’s, “seem more like the type to master this
type of slow, elegant dancing.”

“Oh?” His eyebrows rose in amusement at her statement. “What made you think so, Berdara?”

Gwyn shrugged, “I don’t know - call it feminine intuition.”

He nodded and held back his smile. “Perhaps you are right,” he mused, “And that’s why I am not
dancing now – nobody is ready yet to witness my charming dancing skills.”

It took a moment for Gwyn to realise he was messing with her, but then Gwyn started laughing
uncontrollably. “Well, I guess you’d have to show me one day!”

Azriel shrugged, leaning back into his chair. “We’ll see about that.”

She stopped laughing and raised one eyebrow at him, “Oh? Why? Scared you won’t match up to
my dance skills?” She taunted, “Trust me, Shadowsinger, between you and I – I am the worst
dancer. And I am looking forward to proving you that.”

Azriel tilted his head to the side, amused and surprised. Did she really make a competition out of
which one was the worst dancer?

Of course she was, that’s how things worked between them. If there was anyone that could match
up his competitiveness, it was Berdara.

“Maybe then you can also sing to me like you’ve told me you would.”

Azriel stilled at her statement, the amusement gone. He raised one eyebrow, “I may be really old,”
he started, taunting her words, “but my memory still serves me correctly – therefore, I perfectly
remember that I’ve never told you I’d sing for you.”

Gwyn blinked, “You told me you sing.”

“Yeah, but not that I would be singing for you.”

Gwyn shrugged and moved her hand in a dismissing gesture, “Same thing,” Azriel could only stare
at her as she continued, “you confessed you sing, when you could’ve easily lied to me. But you did
not, you told me the truth. That means you want to sing to me one day,” Gwyn grinned and patted
her temple a couple of times with one long, slender finger, “See? Using my brain, Shadowsinger.”

Perhaps he should’ve lied to her that night. But it came almost naturally, the honesty then when he
told her he sang.
Nobody but her and his brothers knew about it.

Azriel squinted at her, “I’ll hear you singing first, and then I may consider singing to you.”

Gwyn’s grin disappeared and her lips parted in surprise. “May consider singing to you?” she
repeated, then snorted. “Unlike you, Shadowsinger, I am not shy when it comes to singing. You
can come to one of my services anytime and listen to me.”

“And who said I am shy when it comes to singing, Berdara?” He grinned, smugly, “I am very
confident in my singing, in fact.”

He was not.

It was far too personal for him to share with anyone. He didn’t know whether he was good or not –
he just knew singing helped him deal with hard moments, it was an escape for him.

Gwyn gave him a knowing look. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” She chuckled, deciding to
drop the subject.

Azriel watched her, amused by her childish comeback, but decided to drop it as well.

“She gave me the strength to be here,” Gwyn said all of a sudden, and Azriel didn’t stop his small
frown. What was she talking about? Who was she?

“I had doubts about coming, because I was scared leaving the library,” Gwyn looked down at her
hands in her lap, “All my life, I’ve been more or less ‘trapped’. I’ve never left the temple until…
well, you know,” her voice got small and he noted how she shivered at the memory. “I never got
the chance to visit Velaris, even though it used to be one of my dreams. Me and Catrin – we’ve
always planned on leaving together, living our life there. But things don’t always go as we wish,”

“I am obviously here for Nesta and Cassian, but thinking of Catrin encouraged me coming,” she
smiled a bit, “because I know she wouldn’t want me to spend my whole life inside the library.
She’d want me to leave one day; to – to do what we planned to do together.”

Azriel should’ve known Gwyn never visited Velaris, but he still found himself surprised by her
confession. He could not help but think how he also had been trapped, kept away from the world
many, many years ago.

Sure, it wasn’t exactly the same – but she, as him, more or less had been trapped, held back from
the outside world.

Azriel wasn’t sure what took over him, but he found himself slightly drifting closer to her. He was
careful, studying her face for any sort of discomfort.

None.

He smiled a bit, before speaking, “If you ever decide you are comfortable, ready to go to Velaris,”
he hesitated for a moment, then kept going, “you can always come to ask me to take you there. Be
your guide - I know a couple of places that I am sure you’d love.”

Gwyn stared at him in awe, and Azriel felt his cheeks flushing. “Are you serious?”

“Of course, Gwyn,”

There was something flashing in her eyes, then Gwyn smiled broadly, “Thank you, Azriel. For
everything you’ve done for me.” He looked puzzled, so Gwyn continued, “You saved me, Azriel –
if you hadn’t come that day, I… I,” she closed her eyes, unable to finish.

And Azriel did not want her to, either, because the thought of her not being there with them,
alive, awoke something in him... almost primal, a sudden urge to torture the ones that would've
dared take Gwyn away from this world.

And from him.

“Gwyn, you don’t have to thank me,”

“I do.” Gwyn opened her eyes and grinned, “You took your time to help me train – even overtime,
when you barely knew me. And you’ve done so much for me, I am forever going to be grateful.”
With that, Gwyn absently placed a hand over her chest.

On top of the necklace.

Azriel’s blood ran cold for a moment. Did she know it was from him?

The way she stared at him told him nothing. Maybe she did not know – or, if she did, Gwyn
decided not to say anything.

So Azriel didn’t, either.

Instead, he gently tugged one of her fallen coppery strands behind her arched ear. Gwyn blushed,
but did not move away from him. In fact, she seemed to get closer as well.

Then, she took him by surprise by leaning against him, placing her head against his shoulder. An
innocent gesture – it was no different than when Feyre would do this, right?

It was. Because with Feyre, he had never felt more than a brotherly-sisterly gesture when she’d
lean her head against his shoulder.

And most importantly, with Feyre, he had never felt something in his chest sparking.

Azriel hesitated only for a moment, before wrapping his arm around her shoulders, lightly tugging
her smaller frame against his. Gwyn snuggled closer, probably drawn to the warmness of his body.

His shadows finally moved from their hiding spot, and immediately wrapped around the two. Well,
more like wrapped around Gwyn, as they fondly brushed her skin and played with her hair.

Her chuckle filled Azriel’s heart with joy, and, at that moment, he knew he’d do anything to make
her chuckle, laugh more.

He felt the urge to kiss the top of her head, just like he’d do with Feyre, but he refrained from doing
so – because it felt far too intimate in this situation with Gwyn, and he didn’t want to scare her
away or repulse her.

So he just held her against him, and he somehow felt calmer now, with her close to him, protecting
her –

Azriel pushed the thoughts away, then looked around, his eyes stopping on Feyre and Rhys. Both
were dancing, only that, unlike Nesta and Cassian, who were solemnly focused on each other, the
High Lady and Lord were watching him and Gwyneth.

Feyre was smiling warmly, while Rhysand just studied them, something content in his violet gaze.
Azriel’s face got hot, unused to this kind of attention.

A gentle brush at his mental shields and Azriel knew immediately it was Feyre. He let her in, her
soft voice making him smile, “Take care of her, Azriel,”

He did not think of what he said next. It came over him instinctively, “With my life.”

His eyes widened at his words, and he stared at Feyre, who just grinned, knowingly. She left his
mind, and Azriel knew she must’ve told Rhys what he said, because his brother and High Lord
soon mirrored his mate’s look.

A simple nod in his direction, and Azriel guessed what that meant. What his words, how he said
them without even thinking, truly implied –

But Azriel was not going to focus on their implications, not at that moment at least. He wanted all
his attention to be on Gwyn, on how amazingly right it felt having her against him like this.

Azriel’s gaze moved from Feyre and Rhysand, stopping on Elain, who was seated at a table across
the garden, holding a sleeping Nyx against her chest – and also holding her mate’s hand. They
were both quietly chatting, and Azriel could not remember the last time he had seen any of them
this content, lively.

Especially in each other's company.

And, for the first time in years, Azriel did not felt that pang of jealousy as he watched them close.
In fact, he felt… happy for them.

Elain’s attention moved from her mate to Azriel. Her eyes sparked with joy as she saw him and
Gwyn, and the last words she told him earlier rang in his ears.

“The moment we are going to stop focusing on our flaws, on why we are undeserving - or on what
we think we are entitled to have – then we are going to realise whom the right people are for us.
And that they’ve been next to us for some time.”

Elain nodded softly at him, and Lucien looked away from her, his attention coming on Azriel and
Gwyn. He tensed for a moment, but relaxed as soon as a ghost of a smile played on Lucien's lips.
He raised his glass in Azriel’s direction, and the Shadowsinger mirrored the redheaded’s man grin.

And then, reflecting on Elain’s last words more, Azriel realised that from the moment he and
Gwyn started talking, he stopped overthinking. He stopped doubting his worth, stopped blaming
the Cauldron for leaving him mateless.

Azriel solemnly focused on Gwyn and enjoyed her company.

The spark in his chest intensified, almost painfully, like trying to send a message that Azriel was
unable to pick up – or he refused to.

Azriel leaned his head against Gwyn’s, his grip on her tightening a bit. He was grateful to have had
that talk with Elain.

Because she made him realise all he needed, all he had been desperately looking for centuries, was
right next to him.

She made him look ahead – and what were the odds that, the one person he first saw, was no other
than the woman that had been a mystery for him for the past months; that had, inexplicably, drawn
 him closer to her; that had charmed him with her courage, determination, irreverence?

Valkyrie.

Carynthian.

Gwyneth Berdara.

Mate, Mate, Mate, his shadows kept singing to him, and Azriel closed his eyes, not refraining from
broadly smiling.

Chapter End Notes

I must admit, I added a lot to this chapter today, haha. What I first wrote was shorter
and didn't have as much detail.

In fact, before deciding on writing a one-shot, I wanted to write a complete fic, and
this was supposed to be the first chapter. But I am not as creative as to create a plot for
a story that has each chapter connected to the other, so...

I know this was a long one-shot, but I just could not help myself. I think this was my
favourite chapter to edit and imagine.
 To be the one pursued
Chapter Summary

Azriel opens up to Gwyn about his past pining, and Gwyn is bold enough to make a
move on the Shadowsinger.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

"I must admit," Gwyn started, her head thrown back, staring at the sky, "I would've never thought
that the Spymaster and Shadowsinger of the Night Court had such a... fancy love life,"

Azriel snorted, sipping from his drink, his eyes darting from Gwyn to the sky. "Fancy? Couldn't
find a better word to describe it, Berdara?" he muttered, his lips twitching.

For centuries, Azriel never even considered there'd be someone he could trust enough to open up to
like he would do with his family.

No, that was not the case, because Azriel would not tell Gwyn as much as he'd tell his family.

He'd tell her more.

How did she do it? Azriel was still clueless about how the charming priestess effortlessly gained
his trust and got him comfortable talking about personal matters; how Gwyn got him to open up to
her after barely a year of training together more than he'd do it to people whom he'd known for
centuries.

Gwyneth, somehow, got him. She had shown an odd interest in him, and she'd not given up on him,
even when he tried to push her away so he would not burden her with his problems. Of course, the
stubborn Valkyrie had none of it.

Gwyn knew exactly how to push him to talk to her without being obnoxious, or pry into his life.

The friendship they built over the past year was terrific, and Azriel was truly grateful for it.

Nights like this one were not unusual for them. Both had a hard time getting proper sleep, each
haunted by nightmares, so they'd push it back as much as they could; and meeting every night on
the House's balcony, staring at the sky and chatting became their favourite activity - other than
training and competing over the silliest things.

Now, after deferring this moment for a while, he finally told her about Mor and Elain. He could
only do it now because Azriel didn't desire any of them like he used to anymore. The thoughts he
had about them, how he first believed Mor, then Elain, should've been his mate, were long gone,
pushed in some corner of his mind.

Azriel realised, eventually, that what he felt wasn't love, but an obsession over a bond, and he
moved on and tried not to focus on finding his mate as much.

To be fair, Azriel was initially a bit nervous speaking to Gwyn about how he pined after those
women, worried about her reaction and how she'd perhaps be repulsed by his behaviour.

Yet no judgement could be spotted in her teal eyes, just curiosity and some sort of sympathy.

Then, of course, she had to tease him - it wouldn't be the Gwyn he knew if she hadn't taunted him
about it.

"Do you have a better word to describe it, Shadowsinger?" Her eyebrows shot high in amusement
as she finally looked at him.

Oh, he had plenty - such as pathetic, odd, condemnable, unpleasant. Yet, he stayed silent and took
one more sip of his whiskey, his glass soon refilled by the House.

His shadows were casually resting on Gwyn's shoulders, some playing with her hair, clearly
ignoring their master's presence. - as usual when Gwyn was around.

She smiled, content with his lack of response, most likely interpreting this as a win on her end.
"See? No better word from you - so fancy it is."

Azriel rolled his eyes, hiding his faint smile behind his glass. "I've already accepted my faith, I
guess,"

"Which is?" Gwyn inquired.

"Mateless, with no woman to ever love me," Azriel shrugged, unaffected, because he really meant
it. He came at peace with the idea that he'd never have someone with whom he'd have a
meaningful relationship; that nobody would want him for more than just some messed up sex.

Gwyn sighed, loudly. "Drama queen!" She complained, rolling her eyes. "Just because you pined
after the wrong women doesn't mean there won't be someone to love you!"

"You don't say," Azriel murmured, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. For some
reason, he found Gwyn's indignation over his statement amusing.

"Now you're mocking me!" Gwyn scolded, poking his arm with one finger, and Azriel finally
chuckled a bit.

"Seriously now, Azriel. First, you pined after a woman that's clearly into women more, then you
went after a woman that's mated," Gwyn glanced at his glass, then looked back at his face, "Again,
just because you chose the wrong women to chase doesn't mean the Cauldron thinks you don't
deserve love, like you believe."

Azriel mused, leaning against the railing to face the dining room. He never thought of it this way,
and strictly focused on his unworthiness.

Maybe the problem wasn't what Cauldron had prepared for him - or hadn't prepared, as he believed
for the past five centuries.

"How about you stop pursuing and let yourself be the one pursued?" Gwyn suddenly blurted out,
catching Azriel off guard.

His eyebrows shot high, "Oh? Let myself be the one pursued?" Azriel then grinned, "You think no
woman has ever done this, Berdara?"

Gwyn gave him a knowing look, "Oh, believe me, I know many did," she rolled her eyes a bit, "but
have you ever paid attention to any?"

"To some, yes, but for different kinds of reasons," he muttered, laughing as Gwyn gave him a dirty,
yet exasperated look, "If you mean pursued as in a woman desiring a romantic relationship with
me, then no - because no woman had ever wished anything romantic with me."

Gwyn tilted her head, "Probably because you were too dense to notice it,"

Azriel was dumbfounded by her bluntness, although he probably shouldn't be. She was a very
straightforward person, and even to this day, Azriel found her irreverence captivating.

"Oh, don't give me that look!" She grinned, and crossed her arms over her chest, "Isn't it logical?
You were set on one specific woman - even if women chased you for a romantic relationship, you
hadn't seen it because of Mor, then because of Elain."

He went silent for a moment, considering her words. "Okay, let's say you're right," Azriel pinched
the bridge of his nose, "still pointless, because I still did not find my mate,"

Gwyn groaned, defeated, pressing her forehead against the railing, "You and your obsession for the
mating bond,"

Azriel threw his head back as he laughed at her reaction. Both had different opinions on the mating
bond, and it took them some time not to bicker over the importance of it.

If months ago this had been a sensitive topic, even around Gwyn, he could now laugh about it -
especially in the priestess' presence, and specifically of her attitude around this subject.

"Fine, fine," Azriel held his hands up in surrender. One of his shadows went back to him, wrapping
around his wrist.

Gwyn did not say anything else about this, although he knew she wanted to. Instead, she rested her
chin against the railing, staring ahead. "I think you should open your eyes, Shadowsinger," Gwyn
started, looking in his direction, "then you'll see that there is someone who has been seeking your
attention for some time."

Azriel stilled for a moment, avoiding looking at her.

What did she mean by this? Could it be -

No, of course not, he was overthinking. No way it could be Gwyn the one she spoke of.

You're not overthinking it this time, Shadowsinger, the shadow around his wrist sung to him,
happily swirling around.

"Perhaps," he muttered, absently, deciding not to give it too much thought and ruin the mood.

He felt Gwyn shift and finally looked at her. She had a determined look on her face, and Azriel felt
his cheeks heating for a moment. "Thank you for trusting me."

Well, he didn't expect her to jump so suddenly from one topic to another. Yet, he was grateful she
did it.

"Of course, Gwyn. We're friends, right?"

Gwyn nodded, "Yeah, and friends help each other," she whispered, moving closer, "and I, as your
friend, promise to help you open your eyes," Gwyn paused and looked away, and Azriel stared at
 her, intrigued.

"And who knows, perhaps I can help you find some other name to think of constantly," she
confidently smirked, "a name of a woman that, I can assure you, has been pursuing you for
months."

Her words sent a shiver down his spine. Was this really happening? Was Gwyneth Berdara making
a move... on him?

It was obvious whom she was talking about now, yet Azriel still wanted to make sure and not look
like a complete fool in front of her. He stirred the glass in his hand, pretending to think. "Is that so,
priestess?" He hummed, staring intensely at his glass, "What name do you have in mind?"

Azriel eventually looked at Gwyn, meeting her challenging stare, "Hm, I don't know, I think the
name Gwyneth Berdara has a nice ring to it, right?" Gwyn contemplated, "It's a pleasant name to
think of, really musical - don't you think so, Shadowsinger?"

He did not bother hiding his amazement, yet Azriel had to admit, he was quite impressed by her
boldness. There was no trace of shyness in her gaze, only confidence that made her even more
charming.

"Gwyneth Berdara. Gwyneth Berdara. Gwyneth Berdara ." Azriel repeated, tasting how her name
sounded on his tongue. He grinned a bit, pointing his glass at her after finishing his drink, "I have
to give it to you, this name really has a nice ring to it."

Gwyn smiled broadly, the confidence suddenly replaced by a smug look, and Azriel rolled his
eyes, yet didn't refrain from laughing.

However, his laughter died down as he noticed Gwyn adjust her position to face him. Her teal eyes
did not once break off contact with him, and she raised her hands, moving them closer to him. She
hesitated for only a moment, lightly flinching, then cupped the sides of his neck. Azriel sucked in
breath for a moment as her cold hands made contact with his hot skin, fighting off the urge to grab
her and pull her closer to him.

Gwyn tip-toed, inching closer to him. She halted, her eyes searching his, most likely looking for
approval. Heck, she didn't need his approval to kiss him when he'd been dying for her to do so. But
he bent his head slightly, and Gwyn didn't wait another second, hurriedly smashing her full lips
against his.

For the first time in centuries, Azriel felt like time had completely stopped. There was no one else
in this world other than him and Gwyn - they were the only ones left, kissing softly, yet with such
passion and longing that Azriel was grateful to be leaning against the railing, otherwise he'd be
kneeling at her feet by now.

At that moment, Azriel knew that her name had been on his mind for some time - and Gwyn was
the one to help him realise it.

Chapter End Notes

Gwyn making the first move?

Yes, please.
 Gwyn's little fanfiction
Chapter Summary

Clumsily, instead of giving Azriel the research he asked Gwyn to do for him, she ends
up handing him a story she was writing about herself and a particular love interest that
awfully resembled the spymaster.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Gwyn carefully peeked into the training room, scanning the area. Mother, please, let Azriel not be
there…

She couldn’t face him, she was too embarrassed.

Stupid, she was the stupidest person in the world. How could she mess things up so badly?

How did she not notice she grabbed the wrong pile of papers? Most importantly – why didn’t she
check on them before handing them to Azriel?

Oh, Gods.

Screw her thoughts about facing him today – how was she ever going to look him in the eye again
after she gave him the story she was writing instead of the research he asked for?

Perhaps she wouldn’t be freaking out if the story was not about her and him. Gwyn wasn’t
ashamed admitting she fancied the Spymaster – well, she was not ashamed to admit it to herself.
Her imagination was vast, and after reading so many books – and some were definitely not very
appropriated – she couldn’t help but create some… interesting scenarios.

Writing about them was an escape from her monotone life in the Library, and it was nice
imagining that she and Azriel being together could be possible in one world – well, not in her real
life world, but in a fictional one, yet it still was something.

She had no intention of letting Azriel know about her feelings, because Gwyn was certain he
would never reciprocate them.

So what worse way of finding out that she liked him than reading those stories?

Oh, Gods, how much did he get to read? She prayed to the Mother he saw it was not the research
he asked for and didn’t bother reading further. Otherwise… Gwyn may consider never going to
train again, at least not when Azriel was around.

No, she should stop worrying so much. Azriel definitely did not read her childish story. He had
more important things to do than waste his time with it.

Yeah, that was it. Good – then she could perhaps convince the House later to send the story back
and replace it with the research he asked for.
Gwyn considered asking Nesta to do this for her, but she knew Nesta would most likely read her
story and Gwyn wasn’t exactly in the mood to have her friend tease her more about her crush on
Azriel.

Nesta and Emerie were already mercilessly doing it constantly, even though Gwyn never admitted
having a crush on Azriel to them, so –

“Are you avoiding someone?”

Gwyn didn’t even think twice and answered, “Yeah, Azriel.”

Then, Gwyn stilled when she realised who asked her this…

Mother, could she embarrass herself more? Not only did Gwyn hand Azriel a story she wrote about
them being together, but now she confessed she was trying to avoid him!

Gwyn heard Azriel’s chuckle and closed her eyes tightly. In moments like this one, she wished she
could winnow or something to make her quickly disappear.

Well, not that winnowing worked in the House, but…

She considered ignoring Azriel and walking outside, but she knew very well Azriel wouldn’t leave
her alone there, either.

Did he read her story?

No, impossible. He would most likely avoid her had he read it. At least, that’s what Gwyn hoped.

She took a deep breath and slowly turned to face him. She expected to see him look at her with
disgust or repulsion, yet amusement beamed on his handsome face.

Please let the amusement be exclusively because of what she said earlier…

Gwyn parted her lips to talk, but no word came out. She wasn’t sure what she could tell him.
Should she apologise for admitting she was avoiding him? Should she ask about the story –
apologise for it?

Mother, she was in trouble.

Azriel watched her try to find her words, clearly entertained by this situation. Eventually, he broke
the awkward silence, “So, Gwyneth, about the research,”

He went there directly. No ‘how are you’, nothing.

Great. Just great.

Gwyn cringed and didn’t even let Azriel finish, “Yeah, Shadowsinger, listen,” she took a deep
breath and a step closer, fidgeting, uncomfortable, “I am so sorry for not handing you the
research,” Azriel parted his lips to say something, yet Gwyn kept talking, hurriedly,

“but, just so you know what I gave you yesterday, that story, it had nothing to do with real life. I
mean, i-it means nothing!”

Azriel nodded, fighting a grin, “Of course, didn’t even think that the female protagonist, the
Valkyrie priestess, was you –“
“Or that the male protagonist was you,” Gwyn quickly interrupted, her cheeks heating.

“Of course not, just a name coincidence.” Azriel said as he crossed his arms, and the seriousness
on his face almost made Gwyn think he believed her – but the amused spark in his eyes told her
Azriel was well aware of the truth.

Gwyn promptly nodded, “Yes, just a coincidence – I mean, it was not the first name in my mind,”

“Was it not?”

“No, no. At first, it was…” Gwyn looked around, trying to think of a name, then continued,
“Cassian – yeah, Cassian. But, you know, it would’ve been awkward, because Nesta and him…”
she trailed off, avoiding his burning gaze.

“I see…” Azriel mused, taking a step closer to Gwyn as well, “Sure, there were other similarities
that could’ve made me believe it was me – like him being the Spymaster and Shadowsinger of the
Night Court, with great onyx hair and amber eyes that the priestess got lost into,”

“However, I know very well that it has nothing to do with me.” Azriel finished, his voice slightly
cracking at the end – he was holding back his laughter.

That bastard. That handsome, charming bastard.

Gwyn bit the inside of her cheek and sighed. Then, she asked the crucial question, “So, um, out of
curiosity – how much did you get to read?”

She kept praying he’d say a page or two, nothing substantial. But when she heard his answer,
Gwyn felt like she’d pass out.

“Every single page.”

Mother, please, open a hole at her feet and let her fall in it.

“Oh,” Gwyn answered, and she bet her face was the same colour as her hair.

Azriel must have thought she was pathetic.

She was writing a love story about them.

It only hit Gwyn then – he read every page, everything she wrote. That means he also read the –

All the inappropriate expressions Gwyn knew started running through her mind. Azriel read her
fantasies with him.

Yes, she was definitely not going to be able to face him again.

Why was he not bothered though? If only, Azriel seemed… content. But why? Was her
embarrassment that funny to him not to consider her weird?

“I must admit,” Azriel eventually started, this time not holding back his broad grin, “reading your
story was far more entertaining than reading some research for work.”

Of course it was. Now, he was going to mock her about it and probably laugh with his friends
about her fantasies.

“You’re a great writer, Gwyn. I thoroughly enjoyed it.” This time, the amusement dimmed, and he
 gave her a crooked smile.

“Um, thanks, I guess.” She muttered and looked at her feet. She was still praying to be swallowed
by the ground and never have to face Azriel again.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I asked the House for the research, and also to send you the story
back.”

Gwyn nodded, finally gathering the courage to look at Azriel. His smile never faded as he once
again approached Gwyn.

“Also, may I make a small comment on a scene you wrote?”

Gwyn slightly whined, yet weakly murmured her approval.

Azriel raised his eyebrows, probably surprised she accepted. “Well, I enjoyed every bit of your
story, but one part in particular stood out to me. It was the – how are you, Nesta and Emerie calling
it – smut? Yes, the smut part,”

“If I recall correctly, the priestess – whom, of course, wasn’t you – talked about how Azriel –
obviously, not I – enjoyed tying up their partners, and then he ended up tying the priestess with the
ribbon,” Azriel stopped for a moment, acting surprised, “By the way, incredible coincidence with
the ribbon you cut some time ago, isn’t it?”

With each word, Gwyn cringed more and more. Was that the spymaster in him that enjoyed
torturing people? Because, right now, his taunting was the worst punishment method for Gwyn.

“Anyway,” Azriel continued, “I personally felt connected to Azriel. It was like I was reading about
myself,” Gwyn noticed the mischievous gleam in his eyes as he dipped his head to whisper in her
ear, “And, as tempting as tying up the priestess is… I can assure you about one thing – Azriel
would rather be the one tied up with the ribbon by the beautiful, copper-haired Valkyrie,”

Gwyn gaped at Azriel, a shiver running down her spine.

Did he just say this?

She watched the Shadowsinger pull away with a haughty smirk. He looked at her from head to toe,
then casually strode outside, calling over his shoulder, “Come on, Berdara, we have a long day
ahead.”

Gwyn had to lean against the wall, her legs shaking. She madly blushed, especially when her scent
shifted at the thought of a naked Azriel tied up to her bed with her ribbon, as she slowly rode him
and –

Gwyn groaned, both turned on and annoyed by Azriel.

Wait a minute – did his words mean he also fantasised about her or…?

Gwyn gritted her teeth and slammed her palm against the wall, then followed Azriel, the
embarrassment quickly replaced by fury.

“Shadowsinger, come back and explain yourself!”

Chapter End Notes

Edit: You can find the mini-series based on this prompt (and the following of this
chapter) on my profile, under the same title as this chapter! :) This can be considered
the prologue.

I read a couple of days ago on Pinterest about this prompt with Gwyn writing fan
fiction about her and Az and him finding out, and it's honestly the only thing I could
think of.
 Parenthood
Chapter Summary

Gwyn deals with post-partum anxiety, yet Azriel is there to remind Gwyn what a
terrific mother she is.

Chapter Notes

Warning: as you could tell from the summary of the chapter, this deals with post-
partum anxiety/depression.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Gwyn's singing voice softened with each sob of Catrin’s, which seemed to get louder and louder.
Mother, what was she doing wrong? Why was her daughter this restless?

Was she such a horrid mother?

She tried to push the thoughts away, her voice getting shaky. The tears threatening to fall stung
Gwyn’s turquoise gaze immensely, but she wasn’t going to breakdown, not with her daughter in her
arms.

Gwyn was lost, unable to tell why Catrin wouldn’t stop crying. She thought her daughter was
hungry, but Catrin barely latched on to her breast and she started crying worse. The lullaby that
would usually get Catrin to calm down seemed to upset the baby more.

Was Catrin crying because of her?

Gwyn was so focused that she barely felt the familiar presence in their room. Soon, scarred hands
gently grabbed Catrin, and Gwyn looked as Azriel took their daughter in his strong arms. Catrin
placed her head on his shoulder, and his gentle pats on her back got their daughter to calm down.

How did he do it? Azriel barely touched Catrin, and their daughter stopped crying.

She shouldn’t think like this, yet she experienced a sharp pang of jealousy at the sight. Did their
daughter hate her?

Gwyn dipped her head, pushing the nightgown over her exposed breast to cover up. Azriel softly
hummed and rocked Catrin in his arms, their daughter’s breathing soon becoming steady, a clear
sign of her falling asleep.

Catrin never fell this quickly asleep when Gwyn tried to get her to sleep.

Watching Azriel walk to put Catrin in her crib, kissing their daughter lovingly on the head, Gwyn
didn’t try holding back her tears anymore.

She was at fault. Their daughter loathed her, and that was obvious. What was Gwyn doing wrong?
Why would Catrin react this way only around her?

How could Gwyn fail at being a mother so badly?

Gwyn was tired and hurt. It was all too much. She loved children, and she loved Catrin more than
she ever loved anyone. But being a mother was so hard. How could Gwyn keep living knowing she
was a poor parent?

What was Azriel thinking of her? He must have believed she was pathetic.

Gwyn could barely hold back the sobs erupting from her chest. She scarcely flinched when strong
arms cradled her, and Azriel softly rubbed her back. Gwyn clung to him tightly, weeping into his
chest. She was grateful for his patience, because in moments like that one, she needed time to
gather her thoughts, not be pressed about what was wrong with her.

Azriel’s shadows delicately wrapped around her in one comforting embrace, and her mate tenderly
kissed her forehead.

“She hates me, Azriel,” Gwyn blurted out, her fingers digging into his shoulders.

One of Azriel’s hands moved from her back to her hair, his long fingers going through her messy
copper strands. “Gwyn, honey, Catrin does not hate you,” he calmly stated.

“She does!” Gwyn protested, pushing her body away from his, enough to look at him. She noted
the darker skin under his eyes, matching her own; Azriel was just as exhausted as she was.

“I tried for hours to calm Catrin down! I tried to breastfeed her, but she started crying worse! My
lullaby did nothing, it only got her more unsettled!” Gwyn sniffled, another set of tears running
down her freckled cheeks, “And then you just took her away from me, and she… she stopped,” her
voice was small, and she averted her gaze away from his.

One of his shadows went to her cheek, brushing it. Azriel was quiet, so Gwyn kept going, “I took
care of many children before, including Nyx and Nesta and Cassian’s daughter, and they never
reacted this way. But my daughter…”

“Gwyn,” Azriel cut her off gently, cupping her face. “There are so many moments when I tried to
soothe Catrin, yet she only stopped weeping the moment you took her in your arms. Are you
forgetting those?”

Gwyn did not answer. She closed her eyes as Azriel tilted her head up enough to kiss her tear-
stained cheeks. “We cannot know what got Catrin agitated, but I can assure you it has nothing to do
with her hating you.”

“Honey, you are her mother. The bond between a child and the mother is strong – so much stronger
than it would ever be with the father. How can you think she loathes you, but loves only me?”

Gwyn eventually looked at Azriel, her hands falling against his sides. Her brow furrowed slightly.
Perhaps her mate was right, but it still did not ease the pain and doubt of failing her duty as a
mother.

“You are tired,” Azriel started, smoothly laying Gwyn on her back. “And overwhelmed. I am as
well, Gwyn… I, too, feel sometimes like I am not good enough, that I am at fault for some of
Catrin’s tantrums and that I am a terrible father,"

Gwyn frowned at his words. She didn’t give him the chance to finish, cutting him off fiercely,
 “Never think this, Azriel. You are a great father!”

Azriel’s lip twitched imperceptibly as his fingers rubbed the skin of her neck in one easing stroke,
“And you are a great mother, Gwyn,”

“Then what is wrong with me?” She quietly inquired, sucking on her lower lip, “I can’t stop this
feeling of anxiety. I can’t stop doubting everything I am doing, can’t shake the thoughts that I am
doing a catastrophic work as a mother!

“You gave birth three months ago, and it’s frequent for women to feel this away after birthing,”
Azriel laid on his side, next to her, and laid the sheet over Gwyn’s trembling body, “There’s
nothing wrong with you, Gwyn. Those feelings are eventually going to fade, and you’re going to
realise what a wonderful mother you are.”

“Each time you’re feeling anxious, think of the way Catrin looks at you – Gwyn, the fascination
our daughter holds in her eyes as she watches you, the way she giggles each time she sees you…
how can you ever imagine Catrin would hate you?”

Gwyn blushed at his words, shyly smiling. She glanced at the crib, where Catrin was soundlessly
asleep. Images of Catrin happily squealing in the morning when Gwyn took the baby in her arms
flashed through her mind, and the priestess couldn’t help the joyful spark in her chest.

“You’re right,” Gwyn whispered, rolling on her side to face Azriel. Her finger traced his strong
jawline, as Gwyn lovingly spoke, “Catrin reacts the same way around you, love. So don’t think for
a second you are a bad father.”

Azriel gave her a crooked smile, pulling her body closer to his. “We are both new to this, and
obviously still terrified. But, together, we are fantastic parents – and we’re only going to keep
becoming better and better for our little bundle of joy,”

Gwyn chuckled as Azriel used his shadows' pet name for Catrin, and nodded. “Yes, we will,”

With those words, they shared an affectionate kiss, sealing in one unspoken promise; they’ll stay
together and become the finest versions of themselves for their daughter, and for their forthcoming
children, had they ever decided to have more.

Chapter End Notes

Post-partum anxiety/depression is very common among mothers, and is nothing to be

ashamed of. It’s natural, and it makes no woman weak. A dear friend of mine has been
going through it recently, and I felt like writing something similar.

Also, I know, I know, I usually post at least two times a week, and it’s been exactly
two weeks since I’ve updated this story. I am sorry! But life has been life and… I hope
I can get back to a more regular updating schedule?
 Musical Note
Chapter Summary

Azriel and Gwyn argued over the pitch of a musical note, and before figuring out who
was right, they decide to make bet.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

It was not everyday people would correct Azriel on anything. He was a master of precision, and
he’d hardly allow himself to make any mistakes.

Azriel was his harshest critic, therefore he never needed anyone to point out his errors.

However, the young priestess didn’t hold back from mentioning, indifferently, the spymaster’s
mistakes. He never had anyone try to prove to him so fiercely where he was wrong and why.

Gwyneth truly never ceased to amaze him.

He wasn’t sure whether to be amused or insulted by Gwyn’s remarks regarding the way he sang –
or in what range she believed he should do it.

Because no way in hell was Gwyn right in this situation.

With her brow furrowed, Gwyn boldly pointed at the note on the paper. He tried to hold back his
smile. Even frustrated, Gwyn was charming – more so, honestly.

“Shadowsinger, how can you believe this means to lower your voice?” She baulked, utter disbelief
on her soft, striking features, “It should go higher, like this,” Gwyn demonstrated, her lovely voice
sending his shadows into a swirling dance.

Listen to her, shadowsinger… she is not wrong, they sang, content.

Whose side were they on?

Azriel scoffed, “I think you are muddling up notes, priestess,” he argued, bringing the paper closer
to him. His finger brushed hers, her soft skin against his rough one sending a shiver down his back.

“The extra line on top is clearly a sign of a lower pitch, held for a brief moment,” Azriel explained,
his fingers moving to the next row, stopping over a note similar to the one they were arguing over,
“Now this one, you see, it’s the one that indicates a higher pitch, like the one you just sang.”

Gwyn parted her lips, blinking for a couple of seconds, before shaking her head. “Azriel,” when
she used his name, it was serious, “you’ve never been more wrong! You are mixing up things!”

“Mother…” Azriel muttered, running a hand through his hair.

Let it go, agree with her…

Hell no. Azriel was not going to drop this, wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction she beat him at
something; especially when Gwyn was clearly wrong.

“I’ve been studying music notes my whole life, Shadowsinger. I know very well that I am right!”
Gwyn stubbornly stated.

A broad grin broke on his face, “So have I, Gwyneth. And five centuries are more than barely
thirty years,” Azriel shrugged with the same irreverence Gwyn has shown him plenty of times.

The young priestess arched one copper eyebrow, “Maybe that’s the reason you are confusing
them,” Azriel frowned, puzzled, and Gwyn continued, matter-of-factly, “You’re old, so you clearly
forgot their meaning.”

He stared at her, astonished. Azriel’s shadows snickered at her words, which only got him more
dumbfounded.

Before Azriel had time to come up with a good comeback, Gwyn looked at the ceiling. “Please,” it
was enough for the House to suddenly drop a book between them. Azriel quickly read the title –
Tale of musical notes.

Gwyn turned her attention to him, holding her hand out. He stared at it, for a moment dazzled, then
raised his eyebrow. “Do you want to bet?”

“Of course, Shadowsinger.” Gwyn answered as if it was the most natural thing to happen.

Azriel pondered for a moment, then shrugged. He had nothing to lose, especially when he was
more than certain she was wrong in this situation.

“Alright, Berdara, since no way in hell you’re right.” Azriel grinned, placing his hand in hers to
shake.

Gwyn mimicked his grin, “Careful, Shadowsinger. You said something similar about us not
completing the blood rite qualifier, and guess who turned out to be wrong?”

Indeed, she was right. Azriel wouldn’t admit it to Gwyn now, or ever, but the only reason he said
that was to push them – especially her – to not give up. He wanted to drive Gwyn to pass it, for her
to wipe the cocky smirk he intentionally threw her way to spite her.

Now, however, Azriel truly believed his words – no way in hell was she right.

“I still did not get my prize, by the way,” Gwyn teased.

Pure male confidence beamed as he spoke, “And nor are you going to get one now,” Gwyn rolled
her eyes, and Azriel smirked, “But fine, to make things fair. What do you want if, by a miracle
from the Mother, you are right?”

Gwyn thought for a couple of moments, “Hm, if I am right… I want a flight,”

“I’ve taken you on flights many times, Gwyneth,” Azriel said, surprised by her demand, “I
expected something more.”

However, Gwyn smiled, “Not any flight – I want you to take me to that spot you kept talking about
on the top of the mountain.”

Azriel angled his head. It was not something farfetched to ask, so he nodded. Although Azriel
knew deep down he was going to take Gwyn there anyway, even when it was going to be proven
 how mistaken she had been.

“Your turn,”

He didn’t need time to think, and simply said, “When I win, I will take you to that jewellery store
you keep refusing to come with me, and you must let me buy you something.”

Gwyn scrunched her nose, clearly displeased. “Oh? Azriel, I told you before, I don’t want any – “

“Weren’t you ranting about how your knowledge of musical notes is precise?” he taunted, “If
you’re so sure and confident about it, then no need to worry about being forced to choose jewellery
to wear.”

Gwyn sneered, “The pleasure of wiping that smug smirk off your face will be as great as it was
when I passed the qualifier – even better now!”

Azriel softly chuckled and watched Gwyn open the book. He allowed himself to admire her beauty,
especially with his shadows grazing the exposed skin of her neck.

Gwyn skimmed through the pages, then stopped when she found what she needed. Azriel wasn’t at
all curious, convinced he was right.

However, the moment she broke into a wide grin, Azriel knew he lost. Gwyn didn’t say a word,
just pointed at the top of the page. Azriel tilted his head to read, and held back the miffed groan.

The priestess proudly admired her nails, “What were you saying earlier – no way in hell you’re
right,”

Azriel crossed his arms over his chest and rolled his eyes. He must admit, his ego was hurt a bit,
but it didn’t take away from the spark he felt as her teal eyes lit the moment it was confirmed she
had been right.

“Fine, Berdara, you won that flight,” Azriel muttered.

She clapped her hands, excited, “Great! It’s going to make a lovely date spot!”

Azriel didn’t hold back the small smile at the excitement Gwyn showed. Other women would’ve
hoped to lose so he could buy them jewellery.

Yet Gwyn was not like any other woman he had ever met in his long life, which only made the
stubborn, competitive priestess even more special in Azriel’s eyes.

“But I am still getting you something from that store,” Azriel added, his tone leaving no room for
arguing.

Gwyn protested, “You cannot do this! You lost!”

Azriel smiled and moved closer to Gwyn. His hand went through her thick, copper locks, and he
angled her head gently. “Consider this your prize for passing the qualifier last year,”

Before Gwyn could object once again, Azriel pressed his lips over hers, revelling into the sweet
taste of her exquisite mouth.

Chapter End Notes

I can see something like this happening between them, and nobody can change my
mind.

Also, I found this while cleaning the folders in my laptop (had to get rid of everything
that reminded me of exams, haha) and… why not post it? I have to make it up for
going missing for two weeks.
 Period Pain
Chapter Summary

Gwyn deals with period pain, and Azriel does his best to make it easier for her.

He knew that moment would come again one day or another — and, in all honesty, he dreaded it
because he knew he'd be unable to help Gwyn and take the pain away.

It wasn't the first period she experienced since they've been together, but in the past years, they
hadn't shared a room. When she'd go missing from training, he knew her cycle had come. She'd
never let him see her on the first two days; she only let Nesta in, and he could only guess her pain
was so immense, only Nesta could help her deal with it. The rest of the time left of her period, she'd
be, understandably, moody as hell.

Each year, he tried his best to be as helpful as he could. Anything Nesta would demand he got, he
did it in a heartbeat. It killed him that she experienced such great pain, and he was unable to do
anything to make it better. Yet, that year, he'd do his damn best to ease her pain.

When she was finally ready to move into his room, one of the first things that came into his mind
was her cycle and how to be prepared for it. He more or less kept track of it with her, and one
reason was that they had to be extra careful having sex when her period approached. Neither was
ready for a child, and even though they drank their contraceptive tea, it was best they stayed
cautious. It wasn't hard to know when her cycle approached, given her increased sex drive — for
which he'd never complain.

Yet, another reason he kept in mind when her cycle shall come was to be ready with everything
she'd need. Azriel knew it had to come in the next few days. And when he felt Gwyn jolt from his
arms in the morning, darting to their shared bathing room, he knew it was that time.

Azriel knew Gwyn wouldn't let him in, and he didn't want to make her uncomfortable. Yet, he sent
a couple of shadows into the bathroom to soothe her. He didn't hear Gwyn complain, which
relieved him. Meanwhile, he headed to one particular shelf in the closet, one Gwyn couldn't reach
to, where Azriel gathered everything she'd need on her period: blankets, fluffy sweaters and socks,
a stuffed toy, books, tonics from Madja and a jar which Nesta thoroughly instructed he'd fill with
warm water and place it to her stomach. There were a couple of things missing, but he'd get his
shadows to fetch them.

As Azriel carefully laid everything out, Gwyn walked out of the bathroom. Her hair was a mess,
eyes puffed out, face drained out of colour. Her hand pressed onto her stomach, sobbing quietly.
His heart broke at the sight, and he hurried to her. Gwyn didn't have time to protest as Azriel gently
picked her up, carrying her to their bed. She cuddled against him, tears soaking his bare chest.

“It hurts so bad,” she muttered, curling into a ball as he gently placed Gwyn down.

He pushed back some of her coppery-brown hair, “I know, honey. I'm here for you, I promise,” he
placed a delicate kiss on her forehead, “I'll be back in a moment,”

Azriel left his shadows with Gwyn, who protectively wrapped around her weeping form. He filled
the jar with warm water, wrapping a towel around it, so it wouldn't burn her in any way. Gwyn
allowed him to move her slightly from the curled position, enough to press the jar against her lower
belly. A soft sight left her lips as she pulled her legs to trap the jar between her stomach and thighs.

Only a couple of minutes had passed, and she stopped crying, her features lightening ever so
slightly. Azriel helped Gwyn take a tonic, encouraging and soothing her the best he could. Her
eyelids fluttered shut, her breathing evening out. Azriel was careful as he put the socks on for her,
making sure he wouldn't move her too much and trigger more pain.

“Az,” she breathed out, “can you please cuddle me?”

He faintly chuckled at her request. “Of course, Gwyn,”

Azriel grabbed the blanket with him, covering both of them. He shifted until her back pressed
against his chest. Carefully, he wrapped one arm around her. Gwyn let out a content sight and
wiggled closer, drawn to the warmth of his body. “Will you sing for me, please?”

Anything for her. He quietly sang her favourite lullaby, once in a while kissing the top of her head.
Even at the sound of her barely audible snores, he silently sang. If she managed to fall asleep, then
her pain must be bearable. He instructed his shadows to get Gwyn's favourite sweets.

After what must've been hours, Azriel almost fell asleep as well. Yet the light jerk of her body had
him wide awake, for a moment panic settling in. Yet Gwyn turned her head to look at him, her teal
eyes more lively than earlier that morning.

"How are you feeling now, honey?" Azriel crooned, brushing a finger down her cheek. He pressed
a kiss on top of her nose, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"Better," she admitted, "although I still feel like shit and would rather stay the whole day in bed,"
Gwyn continued with a chuckle.

Azriel's lip twitched, "Then we stay the whole day in bed, Gwyn."

Except for the times when Gwyn went to the bathroom — he'd be the one to carry her in and out of
it, despite her initial objections about how she could use her legs to walk — they truly spent the
whole day in bed. Gwyn devoured the sweets, reluctantly sharing a chocolate with him. They
cuddled, talked, kissed and laughed; Azriel even read to her, smiling fondly when she fell asleep
again. By the time the day was almost over, Gwyn's pain was barely perceptible.

They were facing each other, chuckling about something Azriel had said, when the door was
opened forcefully, a furious Nesta standing at the doorway. She opened her mouth, most likely to
scream, but halted as she looked around the bed. Her eyebrows shot up slightly as she angled her
head.

Azriel groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. He'd be lying saying he didn't expect her to barge
into his room this way, but that didn't mean he was content with it. “For the Mother knows what
time, don't you knock?”

Nesta was quiet for an extra moment, and then broke into a grin, "Oh, look at you — the feared
spymaster is actually a huge softie for his mate!"

"Fucking hell," Azriel muttered under his breath, falling against the bed with a groan.

Gwyn chuckled, "He is — my big, Illyrian softie," she commented, pecking his cheek lovingly.
He could feel his face getting hotter, but he refused to look in Nesta's direction as she talked for a
couple more minutes, then left. Azriel shook his head as Gwyn laughed, "And you'd think she
learnt her lesson after the last time she barged into our room," Azriel muttered with a knowing
smirk teasing his lips.

Gwyn blushed, rolling her eyes. She rested her head on his shoulder, placing a leg over his, her arm
lazily thrown over his torso, "Thank you for today, Azriel. I feel almost as new thanks to you,"

He beamed, meeting her lips in a soft kiss. "Anything for you, Gwyn. I love you,"

"I love you too, Az."

 Father's Day Surprise
Chapter Summary

For years, Azriel got cards for being the best uncle on Father's Day. This year, an
additional card brings a surprise he only dreamt of.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Sorting through the cards, Azriel could only smile. It all started years ago when, on father’s day,
little Nyx excitedly ran to Azriel and Cassian, holding two cards to them.

“Happly bilthtay, uncle Azzy and uncle Cass!”

To say it melted everyone’s hearts was an understatement. How the toddler didn’t want to leave
Azriel and Cassian aside and also made something for them – drawings of each (which were lines
and attempts of wings, but nonetheless adorable for a two-year-old) and on top of each card
written, most likely with Rhysand’s help, To the best uncle.

It has become a tradition in their family since. And it’s been going on for years, even with Nyx
now in his early twenties (and now a remarkably talented artist, taking after Feyre); with Nesta’s
and Cassian’s little girls, Elain’s and Lucien’s son, and, starting last year, the youngest of them all,
Feyre’s and Rhysand’s daughter.

It’d been no exception that year. Going through them, each so different yet all so beautiful, made
him feel things.

Azriel and Gwyn have been together for two decades. Been through hell and back and the Mother
knows what else. They have been happily married and mated for some time, too. Of course, they
talked about starting a family at a certain point, yet neither brought up the subject since. Over the
years he’s been with Gwyn, he saw a future with her. Wanted to spend the rest of his life with her,
and that was even before the bond snapped for both.

That being said, if Azriel ante-Gwyn wouldn’t even have considered the idea of ever having
children, Azriel post-Gwyn has. And, truth be told, he wanted a child of their own. A mini-version
of Gwyn and him. The thought always warmed his heart.

Unless Gwyn brought the subject of having children again, Azriel wouldn’t dare mention anything,
though. It was her choice when or if she still wanted children. If Gwyn had changed her mind and
decided not to have children, nothing would change between them. He’d happily spend the rest of
his life with Gwyn, just the two of them. He loved her too much.

Azriel pushed the thoughts out of his mind, coming to the last card –

Or not.

He frowned as he pulled a card he hadn’t seen before. He opened them all as soon as his nieces and
nephews gave them to him, so there was no way something slipped. Maybe it was left there by
accident?
Checking on it, his frown deepened. The card was… empty. Blank.

Are you sure, singer? One shadow excitedly wrapped around his wrist. Azriel didn’t get confused
easily, but this time… even his shadows’ behaviour had been odd all day – no, not only that day.
For some time, he noticed they were… giddy? On the edge, but not in the danger alert manner. He
could hardly explain, and that was something rare. And nor did his shadows want to tell Azriel.

Azriel adjusted his wings, allowing Gwyn to press her front against his back. Her slim arms came
round his middle, nimble, delicate fingers tracing the swirls of his tattoos she knew by heart, even
with her eyes closed.

“Why are you so tense, Shadowsinger?” Asked Gwyn, standing on her toes to peer over his
shoulders.

“One of the children must’ve slipped this empty card by accident,” Azriel replied.

Gwyn placed her chin on top of his shoulder and hummed. “Is it really empty?”

Azriel looked at her with a bewildered frown. Gwyn simply grabbed the card and turned it over,
where Azriel finally noticed there was, indeed, something.

And he was just as confused as before, if not further.

To the best Dadda in the world!

“Unless this is from you, I really don’t see your point, Berdara.” Azriel joked, chuckling when
Gwyn swatted at his chest. “Well, what else is there? It’s an empty card, certainly not for me.”

“I guess you need to wait at least three years to have something doodled on this card,” Gwyn
whispered. Her fingers were shaking as she pointed at the corner of the card. Azriel carefully read
it, his body stiffening. The message. Gwyn’s words. Was he interpreting or –

A soft scent reached his nostrils, etched into Gwyn’s natural one. Hardly perceptible, but it was
there.

I can’t wait to meet you in a couple of months, Dadda!

His knees buckled. Azriel grabbed on the desk, knowing he’d collapse otherwise. “Gwyn,” his
voice was shaking. “is this – are you – ”

Her serene chuckle brought tears to his eyes. He didn’t even feel Gwyn come to face him, cupping
his face between her soft hands. “Yes, yes,” Gwyn whispered, and within seconds she was in his
arms, chuckling and sobbing as he held her tight, his wings protectively wrapping around her.

Azriel couldn’t stop his own tears, face buried in her auburn hair. His shadows were singing,
happily dancing around them; playing with Gwyn’s hair, stroking her bare arm gently.

“Please, Gwyn,” he couldn’t finish the sentence, speechless because of … fucking everything.

Gwyn, his lovely and brilliant mate, understood what he needed to hear. “I am pregnant,” Gwyn
pulled back enough to look into his eyes, her beautiful teal ones glassy with tears. “We’re having a
child. Our child, Azriel.”

The sound of his name, that as they were speaking, there was life growing in his mate’s womb
–their child – it was too much. Azriel kissed Gwyn, long and passionate, pouring all his love into
the kiss. All the unspoken words, what he couldn’t tell her because he was fucking overwhelmed.

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” Azriel whispered between kisses, pulling Gwyn as close as
possible, yet careful not to add any sort of pressure so he wouldn’t hurt her or the baby. Fucking
Cauldron, their baby. Something snapped in Azriel then, lethal and possessive, and he knew damn
well he’d kill anyone that touched Gwyn, his pregnant mate –

Gwyn laughed. “There you go.” Azriel blinked, which earned an eye roll from Gwyn. “Don’t tell
me you weren’t thinking about murdering anyone that’ll touch me, now that you know I’m
pregnant.”

Azriel cocked an eyebrow, holding back the amused smile. “What gave it away?”

“I’ve seen how Cassian, Lucien and Rhysand acted when Nesta, Elain and Feyre were pregnant,”
Gwyn grinned, knowingly. “And you, my dear mate, are far more possessive than them.”

Azriel scoffed, rolling his eyes. He’d love to argue, but she wasn’t wrong. And he knew very well
she was thinking of the little incident after they mated when he may or may not have broken
Cassian’s nose for an inappropriate comment about Gwyn (which yes, had been a joke, and Gwyn
almost had Azriel’s balls for the way he had reacted). Perhaps Azriel would have to ask Rhysand
for that protective shield, at least in the first –

“I swear to the Mother, Shadowsinger, if you are thinking about the fucking shield to protect me
from the others, I will have your head.” Gwyn threatened with a frown.

Azriel rolled his eyes but didn’t dare complain. Instead, he gently tugged Gwyn closer, playing
with her long hair. “Does anyone else know?”

“Lucien,” Gwyn said softly. Azriel tilted her head back and cocked an eyebrow, knowing she was
holding back. “… and Eris.”

Azriel snarled. Oh, that had to be a joke. Out of all the people in fucking Prythian –

“Mother, I can’t believe you two still hate each other.”

Azriel narrowed his eyes and poked her nose gently. “Centuries of hate are hard to erase,”
grumbled Azriel. “We keep it civilised when we see each other, so that is something. And that is
only for you.”

“Yeah, especially after you jumped at each other’s throats when the bond snapped for me and
you.” Gwyn sarcastically replied, shaking her head as she remembered how that night went down
decades ago.

If someone told him that fucking Eris would end up being Azriel’s father in law, he would’ve, most
likely, laughed in the person’s face. Or punched them.

Safe to say neither was elated, but for Gwyn, both Eris and Azriel tried to act as normal as possible
when they had to be in the same room.

“So I guess you found out when you went to Autumn Court with Lucien last month.” Azriel
couldn’t join because of a mission, and Elain decided to stay at the Day Court with her and
Lucien’s son.

Gwyn nodded. “Yes. We were having dinner, and I got nauseous all of a sudden. I believed it was
food poisoning at first,” Gwyn shrugged. “but then the healer checked on me and assured me those
 were normal symptoms for a pregnant woman – who I didn’t know I was until that moment.”

Azriel chuckled and gently rubbed her arm as Gwyn continued. “I’m not that far, only about three
months. Hence I could easily mask the scent with a potion.” Gwyn fidgeted, the glint in her eyes
dimming for a bit. “Azriel, I hope you are not mad.”

“Mad?” He repeated, bewildered.

Gwyn shrugged. “Well, we didn’t exactly plan this.” Gwyn looked down and took a deep breath. “I
know we talked some time ago about having children. I wanted to bring it up for a while now, but I
thought you didn’t want one yet.”

Azriel sighed, cupping her cheek. He smiled when Gwyn leaned against his palm, looking at him
through hooded eyelids. “Gwyneth, I want everything with you. A life with you, children. Every-
fucking-thing. If all, I am honoured.” He pressed a soft kiss against her lips and smiled. “And
fucking happy. You have no idea, Gwyn.”

Gwyn chuckled and pressed her forehead against his. “So, does that mean you recently have been
thinking about having a child, too?”

“I’ve never stopped thinking about having a child with you, love.” He whispered, pampering her
face with kisses, his hand instinctively moving over her belly. And he could feel it – the delicate
swell that hinted she was pregnant. How did he miss it before?

Gwyn’s features softened. She kissed him lovingly, keeping her lips pressed against his. He felt her
little grin, and he knew something was coming up.

“So, I guess I officially won the best card giver?”

“Are you seriously competing now against children?”

“Do I, though,” Gwyn pressed, ignoring his amused question. “Win?”

Azriel rolled his eyes, unable to hold back the smile. “Yes, you do.” He cupped the back of her
head and brought her closer. “I love you.” Azriel traced the petite swell reverently, his smile
widening. “And I love you, little baby.”

“We love you, too,” Gwyn answered softly, sealing everything with a scorching kiss.

Chapter End Notes

Gwynriel pregnancy reveal? One of my favorite tropes.

Oh, and do I believe Eris will be Gwyn's father? Not really (we can never know,
though), but I just found the idea of Eris being Azriel's father-in-law ironic and
hilarious for this chapter, better than her grandfather, so I went with it.
 I notice everything about you, priestess
Chapter Summary

Gwyn's attempt to hide her injured ankle fooled everyone - except the stoic
Shadowsinger, who can't help but notice everything about the lovely priestess.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

Azriel was supposed to focus on the group he was training. His undivided attention should be on
the priestesses he was supervising, making sure they executed the moves right.

Instead, Azriel found himself stealing glances at the young priestess from Cassian’s group. It
wasn’t uncommon for him to occasionally check on what Gwyn was doing, for whatever reason
feeling the urge to see how she was. That day, however, there was something pushing him to keep
looking at her; to go and check on her.

There was some sort of edge on Gwyn that morning. She was stiff, her mouth pressed in a thin line,
save the smiles she threw at her friends’ ways to assure them she was fine.

She wasn’t. His shadows confirmed there was something going on with Gwyn, and tried constantly
to push him into her direction. A part of him was tempted to check on her, or at least get Cassian
do so. Yet he didn’t want to make Gwyn uncomfortable with attention she didn’t like. That, plus he
needn’t Nesta’s suggestive smiles and comments later.

She is hurt, another shadow whispered, frantically swirling around his neck.

Azriel looked at Gwyn only to meet her teal eyes. She offered him a forced small smile, then
looked away. He carefully observed her moves and frowned. Most of her weight was put on her
left leg. She sucked in breath once her right leg supported her weight.

Gwyn hurt her right leg, then — her ankle, more precisely.

How did Cassian not notice it? As charmed as he still was by Nesta, Cassian paid attention to
Gwyn and Emerie, and impeccably trained them.

She masks her pain well, singer, the same worried shadow muttered. Her pain is hardly noticeable.
You are the only one that sees it…

Senses it…

This shouldn’t surprise Azriel. His work made him see through people, through their lies and pain.
It was the odd tightness in his chest that intensified when he was around Gwyn, when she
imperceptibly winced in pain, that troubled Azriel.

Azriel watched the exhausted priestesses complete their work. Gently, he dismissed them, earning
a round of grateful mutters and sighs. He waited a couple of minutes in case any had something to
ask him; which rarely happened as most priestesses were too flustered around him to start a
conversation. Azriel certainly didn’t miss the sighs when he passed some of the priestesses. He
was used to this reaction, and it long stopped stroking his ego.

He strode in Cassian’s direction, eyeing the Valkyries, especially Gwyn. Her strain was obvious to
him by now, but Azriel knew the stubborn priestess would deny being in any sort of pain.

Cassian didn’t spare Azriel a glance, though he was aware of his brother’s presence close to him.
His hard stare didn’t leave the three females. He clapped his hands, earning their attention.

“That’s all for today.”

Pants and curses followed, and Azriel watched Gwyn lay back on the mat. Cassian was looking in
her direction as well. By the look on his face, he would tell Gwyn something.

And he did.

“Try not to overwork yourself, Gwyneth.” His remark made her head snap up, her auburn brows
furrowed. “You struggled today. Take it easy.”

Gwyn huffed. “I am not overworking myself.”

“You are, though.” Emerie intervened, standing back up with effort.

“You are.” Nesta agreed, following Emerie with just as much effort. They looked down at Gwyn,
clear worry on their faces. “I know Merrill is stressing you with that research, but running around
and not sleeping properly will lead to breaking down.”

Gwyn’s flushed face deepened in colour, her freckles standing out. If there was one thing Gwyneth
Berdada despised, it was being coddled or worried over this way. She was getting irritated, and it
wouldn’t be long until she snapped.

So Azriel stepped in.

“She is not.” All the eyes were on him. He ignored the glares Nesta shot in his direction and held a
hand before Gwyn. “If Gwyneth says she is not, then so it is.”

Gwyn accepted his help. He easily hoisted her back to her feet, grasping her forearm with a tad
more force so she wouldn’t put too much weight onto her hurt ankle.

“Which is why she’ll stay over to correct today’s mistakes.”

Her eyes widened in terror, but it was all gone in a brief second. He had to commend Gwyn on
improving keeping her emotions in check.

“I’ll help you.” Azriel added as he let go of her. His fingers tingled, and he ignored the urge to
touch her again.

Gwyn nodded and headed to the water station with Nesta and Emerie. He didn’t pay attention to
Nesta’s words regarding his decision.

“Please tell me you won’t make Gwyn exercise further when she’s obviously in no such state.”
Cassian muttered, crossing his arms over his chest with a worried look on his face.

Azriel scoffed, sharpening his dagger. As if he’d actually meant pushing Gwyn into training more
when she had a sprained ankle.

“I won’t,” Azriel assured just as quietly.

Cassian opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. “Whatever you see as fitting, brother.”

It was time Emerie left back to her shop. Azriel nodded his farewell as Cassian flew Emerie away.
Nesta reluctantly left when Gwyn assured her she was fine — and promised she’d take a break to
read together in the afternoon.

Gwyn looked at Azriel, her bright teal eyes sparkling with something like annoyance.

She is annoyed because she knows you don’t intend to train.

“If you plan on telling me I should stop overworking myself, forget that speech.” Gwyn firmly
said.

“Who said I have a speech ready?” He did, though not about overworking herself.

Gwyn narrowed her eyes. “So you’re telling me you didn’t keep me behind to scold me?”

“You’re hurting me, priestess.” Azriel grinned. “When did I ever scold you on anything?”

“Do you have time ?” Gwyn countered.

Azriel chuckled and took a step closer. “You are not overworking yourself. You are fine.” Gwyn
promptly nodded. “Thus you have no problem with going over the exercises again. Only with more
precision, and each mistake will lead to repeating the exercise over and over, until your execution
is flawless.”

Gwyn took a shuddering breath through her nose, her chest expanding enough for her delicate
breasts to brush his muscled chest.

“Of course not, Shadowsinger, no problem at all.” Gwyn answered, her lips squeezed together. Her
muscles were trembling, a flicker of pain on her beautiful face when she tried to move back.

Azriel didn’t say a word. He watched her while some of his shadows took the liberty to wrap
around her arms and legs in a comforting embrace.

“Gwyn,” Azriel’s voice was gentle. “When did you hurt your ankle?”

Gwyn’s eyebrows shot up in disbelief. She took another step back, her lips parting to probably
deny it but no words followed, only a shriek in pain. She balanced on her left leg, lowering her
head as she answered. “Last night.”

Azriel carefully wrapped his arm around her waist, helping her hop to one of the chairs to sit down.
He kneeled in front of her, his hands grabbing her right foot as lightly as possible. She whimpered,
her eyes shutting.

“May I?”

Gwyn nodded, gripping the edge of the chair while Azriel took off her boot and sock. He tried not
to add too much pressure on her swollen ankle, but he knew with all the effort she put that morning,
any touch would bring pain.

“I didn’t mean to,” Gwyn whispered. “I slipped off the ladder while sorting some tomes. I tried to
maintain my balance, but I landed hard enough on my ankle to hurt it. I put ice on it, and I was fine
in the morning. But when I started training…”

“Gwyn, your well-being is more important than training.”

“I was stupid for not being more careful!” She snapped, her knuckles white when Azriel touched
her ankle. Gwyn clearly tried to mask the swellness by tying her boot as tight as possible. Marks
cut into, deep and red against the bruised skin.

“Trying to hide an injury is just as stupid, if not more.” Azriel retorted with a frown. Gwyn looked
away, making him regret his choice of comeback. He rubbed her foot gently, a feather-like touch
not to trigger immense pain. “Gwyn, you need to have it treated. If the injury worsens, your
training will stall. The recovery will take longer if you wait rather than taking care of it now.”

Gwyn swallowed audibly and said in the smallest voice he’d ever heard from her. “I thought I
finally stopped being weak.”

For some reason, her words were like a dagger pummelled inside his chest. No, Azriel won’t let
Gwyn think this way of herself.

He bent his head lower to catch her eyes with his. “Gwyn, there are some things you cannot
control.” Gwyn opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off. “No, you couldn’t have controlled
this, priestess. No matter how you put yourself down, it is the truth. Getting injured is not a sign of
weakness. Nor is asking for help.”

Gwyn closed her eyes and leaned back into the chair. A shadow stayed wrapped around her neck,
drifting then to dance with a coppery-brown strand that fell out her braid.

“For someone as quiet and broody as you are, you do have a way with words.”

Azriel couldn’t help his chuckle. “What centuries of living can do to one person.”

“You’re the only one that noticed something was wrong with my ankle.” Her tone was not
accusatory. Her eyes pinned his, a teasing grin spreading across her face as she continued. “I never
thought you’d notice me enough to pick on something so subtle, even with your spymaster
reputation.”

“I notice you enough. In fact, I do notice everything about you, priestess.”

His answer came instinctively, and he honestly regretted not thinking before speaking. Gwyn stared
at him, all the amusement gone. A lovely blush spread down her slender neck, her rosy lips parting
in surprise.

Fucking hell, he was in deep shit.

You were honest, and the priestess is flustered. She likes it, though. That you think this of her.

Azriel ignored his shadows. He broke the intense eye-contact and cleared his throat. “I could lend
you some salves, though I believe it’d be better to see Madja to have your ankle properly checked
and treated.”

“Oh, yes, of course.” Gwyn nodded quickly, probably relieved by the change of subject.

Azriel hesitated, but when he saw Gwyn’s small smile in reassurance, he hooked an arm behind
her knees, the other around her shoulders and picked Gwyn up easily. Her arms clung around his
neck, her teal eyes intensely staring at him. He tried to resist it, yet eventually he gave up and
stared back at her.

Azriel was grateful he wasn’t flying because her gesture took him aback: Gwyn’s dainty hand
touched his cheek, almost timidly, before pressing with more confidence when Azriel didn’t pull
 back.

“Thank you, Shadowsinger.”

He was ready to reply that she didn’t have to thank him. Once again, though, Gwyn managed to
shut him up with a soft kiss. Her lips barely touched his rough cheek, and his heart started
hammering against his ribs almost painfully. Something sparked in his chest, his grip on her
tightening.

Azriel stared into her eyes, and for a moment she was all he could perceive. There was nothing but
her surrounding him, engulfing all his senses. His eyes flitted to her lips, and hers did the same.

Do it…

You both want it…

His shadows quietly cheered and encouraged him. Azriel wanted to, more than anything. Feel if
her lips were as soft as he imagined; find out the sweet noises she’d make as they kissed.

Gwyn’s ankle was the priority at the moment. So, with what felt like an enormous effort, he moved
his head away before their lips could touch. He felt Gwyn’s disappointed and shame like a blow.
Azriel shot into the sky, holding her tight to his chest.

“Later,” Azriel cooed, his lips brushing her earlobe. “I want to take my time with you, Gwyneth. I
want you to feel nothing but comfort and pleasure when we are together.”

Gwyn inhaled, her fingers tightening on his shoulders. “Azriel…”

He chuckled, squeezing her gently. “Your swollen ankle impedes this. And now, the priority is to
get it healed.”

Gwyn huffed in displeasure and buried her head into the crook of his neck. He sensed what his
words did to her — and didn’t that make a man stand taller?

Comfortable silence settled between them as Azriel flew them to the River House. He already
asked Rhysand to bring Madja, briefly explaining what happened with Gwyn. They were
approaching the manor, when Gwyn said softly.

“You should take your own advice about putting yourself down and asking for help.” Gwyn
brushed her fingers down the back of his neck, sending a shiver down his spine. “You are worthy,
Azriel.”

Azriel didn’t need to ask what she meant. He didn’t reply, either. He smoothly landed, carrying
Gwyn inside wordlessly.

Her words, however, moved something inside him, and the spark in his chest intensified, glowing
bright, as gold as a string between him and Gwyn.

Chapter End Notes

How come when I have finals around the corner I get most motivated to write?
It was either this or a jealous Az chapter, but I'm a sucker for the 'one is hurt' trope
 Were you jealous? (smut)
Chapter Summary

Gwyn doesn’t understand why Azriel doesn’t get jealous when she dances with a
random stranger. She later finds out why.

Chapter Notes

(Kinda?) Warning: NSFW, spanking, dirty talking (and a bit of toxic possessive
thoughts)

See the end of the chapter for more notes

If somebody were to ask Gwyn what she was thinking, she wouldn't know what to answer. Because
Gwyn herself had no idea what was in her mind.

There she was, dancing with some stranger. His hands on her body, his breath tickling her ear. Her
own hands were on his shoulders, holding him close to her. Yet her gaze kept going back to her
shadowsinger whose face betrayed nothing. Not even the slightest hint of anger, of jealousy. She
tried to reach down their bond, get a sense of what he was feeling, but she was met with nothing.

Though Gwyn was grateful he didn’t make a scene, she couldn’t deny there was a part in her that
wished Azriel had dragged her away from the stranger and claimed her lips right there, showing
everyone who she belonged to — and to whom he belonged. She wanted him to show something
when it came to his feelings for her.

She was his mate. She had another man touching her — respectfully, though it didn’t change that
someone that wasn’t Azriel had his hands on her. And Azriel looked at them as if they were just
chatting, several feet apart from each other.

Gwyn blamed the books she’s been reading recently. She shouldn’t be thinking this. Shouldn’t be
disappointed that Azriel wasn’t jealous.

She tried to push away the thoughts, ripping her gaze away from Azriel’s just as the stranger
brought Gwyn closer by her hips. Their bodies were flush, lips hardly an inch away. His hands
dropped lower to her exposed back, and his lips placed soft kisses down her jaw. Gwyn’s breath
hitched. Teal eyes snapped open, instinctively searching for the familiar amber across the room.

He was watching them. Paying attention to every touch, every shuddering breath. Shadows curled
around his ear. When their eyes met, Azriel flashed her a grin over the rim of his glass.

Gwyn could no longer take it.

She placed her palms flat on the stranger’s chest, and lightly pushed. Thankfully, he let her go
immediately. Whether he truly respected her boundaries or saw her with Azriel earlier, Gwyn
didn’t care. Nor did she look or give any explanation as she turned on her heels and walked away.
Gwyn’s legs were wobbling, and it had nothing to do with her prior encounter. She tried to keep her
expression as cold as possible, but it was damn hard when Azriel was looking at her that way when
she approached him. His eyes lazily dragged down her body, lingering on her hips and legs. He
kept his gaze lowered as he sipped his drink, not before casually asking.

“Done so soon, priestess?”

Gwyn almost snarled. How could he stay so indifferent when she was burning inside?

“Take me home.”

Azriel cocked a brow but wisely kept his mouth shut. She didn’t speak to him on their way out of
the bar, or when he flew them both to the House of Wind. Gwyn tried to understand whatever she’d
hoped to get out of Azriel; was it even normal to try to get her mate jealous?

Of course it wasn’t.

Besides, nobody truly knew to what extent their relationship went, though Gwyn was almost
certain Nesta and Rhysand suspected that there was more between Azriel and Gwyn (though
Rhysand could very well know, including that they were mates). That being said, the little fantasy
Gwyn indulged herself into with Azriel getting all jealous and possessive couldn’t have happened,
given both preferred keeping their relationship away from the curious eyes of their chosen
families.

It was definitely the books she’s been reading. Gwyn had to stop reading all the novels her sister
and the House kept dumping on her bed.

As soon as Azriel carefully set Gwyn down, she pushed away from him and made it to the House’s
entrance. It was far too late to get back to her dorm in the library, and Gwyn didn’t want to wake
her fellow priestesses up. Not to mention she was too… tense to go there. The last thing she wanted
was to walk down there reeking of arousal. Her room in the House would do that night.

Her legs burned, and her feet felt like they were continuously pierced by hot needles. She pushed
through the discomfort, heels clicking against the polished wooden floors as she strode to her
room. Something cold brushed against her arm, down to lace with her fingers. Gwyn shivered as
the touches of Azriel’s shadows multiplied.

Through her hair, over each inch of exposed skin.

Gwyn knew Azriel followed her. Could sense his gaze fixed on how low the dress dipped. She
may have added a bit of an extra sway to her hips, smiling at the tiny hiss Azriel let out.

Gwyn’s hand stayed on the handle, not pushing yet. She waited for Azriel to say something,
anything. Especially now that they were alone, when they no longer had to pretend.

He remained silent. His hands were not on her as she would’ve expected and hoped. Only his
shadows touched her, tugged her hand away from the handle so she’d stay.

Gwyn finally turned to look at Azriel. His hands were clasped behind his back, mighty wings
tucked. His face betrayed nothing as he waited for her to speak. And Mother, was she going too.

However, she didn’t know what to say — or rather how to phrase it. How could she say “You
know, I am disappointed you didn’t act upon your huge wingspan, and didn’t show any sign of
jealousy when I was dancing with some random man” without sounding like an utter fool?
She couldn't.

Her cheeks heated under his stare. Gwyn crossed her arms over her chest. Azriel didn’t even try to
hide how his gaze dropped to her breasts squeezing together.

“You didn’t seem to be bothered when I danced with that man earlier.” Not a question, but an
affirmation she threw his way. It was up to Azriel if he entered her game, or deflected.

“Did you want me to?” His voice dropped an octave, which caused a flood of excitement to rush
through her.

Yes, of course she did.

Gwyn’s face burned. She shrugged, trying to look as nonchalant as possible. “I wouldn’t have been
surprised.” Nor would she have minded. “After all, he wasn’t far from kissing me right under your
nose, Shadowsinger.”

Azriel took a step closer, forcing Gwyn to take one back. Even with her heels, which were still
killing her, he was easily towering over her. Same emotionless expression stayed on his face. It
would’ve made Gwyn believe he was unaffected by her words, had it not been his blazing amber
eyes staring right into her soul, and the flare of his nostrils.

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

“You didn’t answer mine, either.” Gwyn fired just as her back met the door. Their chest barely
touched, and Gwyn held back from arching to press her body against his.

Azriel studied her face for a moment. Then, a scarred hand cupped her jaw. He pressed his
forehead against hers, his hot breath hitting her lips. Why wasn’t he kissing her already? Why were
they still standing there, all dressed up, and were not in her bed, fucking each other’s brains out?

“You wanted me to be bothered, to lose control,” Azriel traced her parted lips with his thumb, a
smirk spreading across his face. “You wanted me to drag you away from that stranger, and claim
you right there. Show everyone that you’re mine just as much as I am yours.”

Gwyn closed her eyes, her breath shuddering at his words. Long fingers circled her throat, adding
light pressure, enough to make her whimper.

“Open those pretty eyes, and look at me, Gwyneth.” Azriel ordered, his deep voice making her
core pulse. Teal met hazel, and Azriel demanded. “Tell me if I am wrong.”

Gwyn shook her head. She tried to speak, her voice coming out shaky. “N - no. You aren’t.”

Azriel hummed in approval, pulling Gwyn closer by the throat. His lips brushed hers, yet he wasn’t
yet kissing her. “You wanted to see me jealous.”

There was no point in denying it. “Yes.” Gwyn swallowed against the dryness in her mouth, her
question barely audible. “Were you jealous, Azriel?”

“Was I supposed to?”

“Were you?’ Gwyn insisted, her breath caught in her throat.

Azriel didn’t reply to her question. “You know I do love you.”

Gwyn couldn’t hide her indignation. That wasn’t the answer she expected, probably because it had
nothing to do with what she asked. Though, Gwyn nodded. “I do, just like you know I do love you,
too.”

Something snapped in him, because his emotionless mask crumbled. His grin turned feral, his
fingers adding more pressure to the sides of her throat. “Good,” he whispered, nibbling the top of
her ached ear. “Because tonight I will fuck you like I don’t.”

Gwyn didn’t have time to react. Not when his lips crashed over hers, the kiss nothing but a clash of
teeth and tongues. Gwyn’s hands shot to his hair, gripping and pulling on it, eliciting a throaty
groan from Azriel. Need coursed through her veins. She couldn’t focus on anything but him. On
their sloppy make out session. His earlier words that made arousal drip down her thighs. His strong
body crushing her smaller one against the door. Gwyn wanted him to take her there, without
holding back.

Azriel grasped the back of her thighs, and Gwyn wrapped her legs around his body. Her heart
hammered against her ribs. She could feel his own wildly beating. His fingers dug into the plump
skin of her legs, undoubtedly leaving marks.

Azriel kicked the door of her room open, carrying her inside without breaking the scorching kiss.
Gwyn felt everything she’d wanted Azriel to show her; his love and need, his unadulterated lust for
her. He claimed her mouth with no remorse, reminding her just how much she was his.

She wished nothing more than for this kiss to last forever.

Unfortunately, Azriel pulled back. Gwyn whimpered, trying to follow his lips for another kiss. Her
plans were in vain. Faster than she could process, Gwyn’s middle was thrown over Azriel’s lap.
Though she was in a hazy, she knew what was about to happen. Her core pulsed in excitement.

Azriel dragged a hand up the back of her thighs, pushing her already short dress over her hips, and
exposing her backside, hardly covered by her panties. He dragged a finger around the lace of her
underwear. Teased her, getting closer to where she needed him the most, before placing his large
palm on top of her ass. Her breath hitched, waiting for his next move.

Yet Azriel took his time, kneading her plumb backside to his liking. Gwyn relaxed, closing her
eyes for a brief moment. She barely flinched when she felt his tongue tracing her ear, his voice low
as he whispered. “You wanted to know if I was jealous earlier.”

The loud sound of his palm hitting her backside reverberated throughout the room. Her eyes
snapped open, and Gwyn cried out. She gripped his leg, biting the inside of her cheek as he didn’t
stop. His heavy hand fell repeatedly on her skin, alternating from one cheek to the other as he kept
speaking. “Yes, Berdara, I was so fucking jealous. I was raging inside when that fucker put his
hands on you. When his lips touched your skin.”

Gwyn’s head fell forward, curtains of auburn hair covering her face as his spanks turned harsher.
Her ass was on fire. Tears burned the back of her eyes. Her nails dug into his leg. She was certain
her ass will be bruised after this, but she didn’t care. She needed more.

“Please,” Gwyn begged. What for, she wasn’t sure. Her core spasmed painfully, her panties
drenched in arousal.

Azriel chuckled darkly. “Please what , Gwyneth?” He heartedly grabbed one of her cheeks,
groaning satisfied. “Your ass is fucking perfect.” Not only did he spank her again, with even more
force, but he sunk teeth into the burning skin of her ass.
Gwyn yelped, pushing her hips up. Her legs trembled, more so when Azriel slid his hand away
from her ass to the inside of her thighs. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head when he brushed
two fingers against her wet slit. Gods, she was melting under his touch. She couldn’t think straight,
not when he skilfully teased her sensitive clit. Gwyn spread her legs, moaning and grinding against
his hand.

Azriel had different plans. Soon, her core stung, and tears fell down her cheeks. The sound echoing
in the room when Azriel slapped her pussy was nothing but lewd. She almost came only from that.

“Answer me, love.” Azriel calmly said, spanking her core once again, softer that time.

Trying to remember what to reply was a challenge, and Azriel rubbing and spanking her clit didn’t
help. After what felt forever, she found the strength to whisper. “Please fuck me, Az.”

Perhaps it was her dizziness, but in less than a second — or so it felt for her — she was no longer
spread across his lap, but on her hands and knees on the bed. Whether he ripped or took off her
dress, Gwyn truly didn’t care at the moment.

One hand curled her dishevelled locks around his wrist, tugging just when he shoved his cock
inside her. Gwyn’s eyes almost crossed at the overwhelming sensation. She was still not used to
how big he was, and at that moment he touched places Gwyn hardly knew existed buried this deep
in her.

“Fuck me,” Gwyn begged, crying out his name when his hips snapped at a maddening pace.

Her bruised ass slammed against him, the sound overpowering their moans and groans in pleasure.
Azriel’s fingers massaged her scalp before grabbing with force, pulling on her hair until Gwyn’s
back was flush against his muscular chest. He thrust upwards, the new angle making Gwyn see
black and white spots.

“I was so fucking jealous I could kill him right then and there, Gwyneth.” Azriel hissed, his free
hand clasping one of her perky jumping tits tightly. She whimpered, her core tightening around his
cock. Azriel groaned, burying her face into the crook of her neck. “What held me back from doing
so — do you want to know?”

He pinched her nipple with enough force to make Gwyn mutter a weak yes.

“I thought about how I’m the one you love, the one you chose to be with before either was aware of
the bond,” he teased her pulse point, his breath ragged, his thrusts more uncontrolled. “That I’m
the blessed bastard to spend the rest of my life with you, the first and only woman I’ll ever love.”

Gwyn’s mouth went dry at his words, something sparking in her chest.

“I then thought about how I’m the one to truly touch you, to hear those beautiful sounds you make
when I please you.”

Azriel tugged on her hair, the hand on her breast moving to cup her throat. Her head was tilted back
as Azriel looked down at her. His wings were spread wide, and shadows loomed behind him.
Gods, he was so handsome. Something dark covered his features, possessiveness and lust shining
in his dark eyes as he whispered. “And, in the end, it’s my cum that fills your sweet little cunt and
drips down your pretty thighs each night.”

His words were her undoing. Gwyn’s vision was blinded as she came over his pulsing cock,
making a mess out of her sheets. The tip of her tongue pushed out of her mouth, and Gwyn’s throat
got sore from the piercing screams. Her body was weak and trembled, and it was for Azriel’s
 strong hold that she didn’t fall.

His cock was still thrusting inside her, gentler. Sweat coated Gwyn’s skin, the hair that wasn’t in
Azriel’s fist pressing against the sides of her face and forehead.

“Good girl,” Azriel praised, kissing her cheek. He didn’t pull out, only laid Gwyn flat on the
mattress, his body pressing against hers. When she opened her eyes, her flushed face deepened in
colour as she was met with their reflection.

Gwyn looked into Azriel’s eyes. “We’re not done, sweetheart.” Azriel brought his forearm around
her throat. A shiver ran down her spine at the hunger in his eyes, and her pussy spasmed in need.
Azriel moved his hips until the tip of his cock kissed her entrance. His powerful slam almost made
her cum again.

“After all, I promised I will fuck you like I don’t love you.”

And Cauldron boil her, he did.

Chapter End Notes

Bonus: this chapter was supposed to end with Nesta banging on the door and
reminding them the rooms aren’t soundproof

The original jealous Azriel I had in mind was a bit too similar to the other jealous
Azriel shot I wrote, hence the late update. But I can say I’m quite happy with how this
turned out. Hope it was to your liking, too. Though I am a bit nervous when it comes
to writing NSFW as I’m not sure I’m very good at writing it. But hey, I’m having fun,
haha.

Also, I am not in general a fan of *real life* jealousy, and never had the urge to make
my then boyfriend jealous, well, when it comes to fiction… I guess I have a weak spot
for jealous guys that don’t truly show it until he and his lover are alone.

And that line with ‘fuck you like I don’t love you’, I’ve seen it on TikTok, but tbh I
forgot the book. But that line made me think of this chapter, so shout out to it.

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