Stunted Stoutfellows Profile

AFC WESTERN DIVISION
STUNTED STOUTFELLOWS
Team Colours: Green and yellow
Symbol: Two interlocked S
Owner: ‘Big’ Lud Shortbottom (Interim),
Wilbert Stoutfellow (in-absentia)
Head Coach: ‘Spotted’ Dick Dinewell
Home Stadium: Candy Stick Park,
(capacity 11,300, surface grass)
Players: Halflings
Sponsor: Satrioli’s Sausage Shops
Cheerleaders: The Stunted Stoutfillies
Even by Halfling standards, the Stoutfellows are a Treeman who carries all of them and the ball
poor team; they can’t run very far, they can’t throw, to the endzone to score. Luckily for them, this
and fatalities every match are quite horrendous. record was later broken by Khain’s Killers.
However, a recent change of ownership may mean
better times are around the corner. 2484 Unknown to everyone, Wilbert Stoutfellow
has a dark secret. His generously
2463 Wilbert Stoutfellow, the proprietor of a proportioned sausages caught the attention
successful chain of sausage shops, leads a of the Mootland underworld, in particular
bid to bring professional football to the ‘Big’ Lud Shortbottom, a member of Nuln’s
Mootland capital of Eicheschatten. notorious Lowhaven Clan who makes
Stoutfellow is a tremendously popular Stoutfellow an offer he can’t refuse, telling
figure, famed for his generously him “It’d be a shame if something nasty
proportioned sausages and optimistic happened to those big sausages of yours”.
outlook on life. He soon has enough backers As a result, Stoutfellow begins to pay
to form a team, and since he’s such a ‘protection’ money each month to the
thoroughly nice chap, everyone insists that Lowhaven Clan and tells nobody for fear of
they be named after him- the Stunted his life.
Stoutfellows.
2486 Crisis hits when the so-called ‘Boar war’ sees
2470 When the Marienburg Fishers quit the sausage meat prices crash. Unable to pay the
league in a principled stand against the Lowhaven’s their protection money, Wilbert
NAF’s substandard half time catering Stoutfellow is last seen being escorted into
arrangements, Wilbert Stoutfellow sees a an unmarked carriage by a Halfling and two
chance for his team to hit the big time. Ogres. The next day a press conference is
Stoutfellow’s jolly demeanour charms held, where the new owner- none other than
Commissioner Three-Horn into letting them ‘Big’ Lud Shortbottom- says, that due to
join the league and complete the rest of the stress, Mr Stoutfellow has gone on a ‘long
Fishers’ schedule. holiday’ and has appointed him to run the
team for the duration. Changes are instant,
2475 The Stoutfellows sense the chance of an unsettled Star Catcher, Warmglow Vindaloo,
easy win when their opponents the Chaos quickly withdraws his transfer request, after
All-Stars fail to arrive in time for the start of waking up to find the severed head of his pet
the game. When the All-Stars do finally gerbil lying next to him in his bed.
arrive at half-time, the plucky Stouts are only
2-1 down! 2487 The new owners use their, ahem, influence,
to get the Stoutfellows an extremely
2481 Star Catcher Warmglow Vindaloo has a favourable schedule at the annual Sock-
break-out season. His surprisingly nimble Exchange meeting. The 2487-88 season is
hairy feet and ability to keep hold of the ball the Stoutfellows’ best ever, they actually win
as though it were a fresh iced bun is the one 5 games. Scale that up three or four times
bright spot in an otherwise poor season for and you can see how the Stouts may become
the Stouts. a force in the AFC west in, say, three or four
decades.
2483 The Stoutfellows get the unwanted record of
worst tackle ever. Five Halflings tackle a
STUNTED STOUTFELLOWS
TEAM PROFILE
2489-90 First Team Roster
No. Name Position Experience

Stunted Stoutfellows’
1 Warmglow Vindaloo Catcher Star Player
2 Mustard Kernel Catcher Experienced Cheerleaders’ Song
3 Fatolph Shortbreath Catcher Veteran " Let’s get ready to Crrrrrrumble!!!"
4 Tully Warmglow Catcher Veteran
5 Largo Chubbychap Catcher Rookie
6 Roscoe Bigfeet Catcher Experienced
7 Willow Barkskin Treeman Veteran
8 Diddly Squat Lineman Experienced
9 Herbert Hugebelly Lineman Veteran
10 Bingo Shortwick Lineman Rookie
11 Mungo Éclair Lineman Rookie
12 Tolman Softgirth Lineman Experienced
13 Dweebe Nelcon Lineman Rookie
14 Gamble Cokey Lineman Rookie
15 Chunk Hamfist Lineman Veteran
Fame: -3 Team Rerolls: 0
The Fans: Chant 1; Hooligans 1; Loyalty 4
Cheerleaders: The Stoutfillies Cheering Ability: 8
Spike! Magazine Team Rating: 134
NAF Records
Biggest Ever Sausage in a Hot-Dog Eaten of the
Team Honours Field of Play:
None 4 feet, consumed by Warmglow VIndaloo vs
Bruendar Grimjacks (2485-86)
Most Receiving Paces Career (Halflings):
Hall of Fame: 2657, Warmglow Vindaloo, 2481-present
None Most Touchdowns Career (Halflings):
48, Warmglow Vindaloo

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AFC WESTERN DIVISION

No. Name Position Experience

Fame: -3 Team Rerolls: 0

The Fans: Chant 1; Hooligans 1; Loyalty 4

Cheerleaders: The Stoutfillies Cheering Ability: 8

Spike! Magazine Team Rating: 134

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