Also by the Author: Allergies and Aversions: Their Psychological Meaning

(1991, Rev. 2006) Addictions and Cravings: Their Psychological Meaning

(1991, Rev. 2006) Animals: Their Psycho-Symbolic Meaning (1991, Rev.
2007) Clothes Consciousness (1985 Rev. 2008)

Healer’s Handbook for Practitioners (from Messages from the Body 1991,
Rev. 2006) Household Hot Spots: Their Psycho-Symbolic and Psycho-
Utilitarian Meanings (1991, Rev. 2008) How to Live Life (1972, Rev.2008)

It’s All in the Family: Exploration of the Life Scripts (1992, Rev. 2007)
Messages from the Body: Their Psychological Meaning (1991, Rev. 2006)
My Car, Myself (1991, Rev. 2008)

Nonverbal Messages “Body Language” (1995, Rev. 2008) Our Personal

Challenges A discussion on Relationships (1968, Rev. 2008) Parent Their
Soul: A Comprehensive approach to Parenting (1992, Rev. 2007)
Problematic Patterns: Behavioral, Psychological and Psychiatric Problems -
Their Emotional Meaning (1991, Rev. 2007) What’s in a FACE? The
Dictionary for Heart Centered Face Reading (1990, Rev. 2007) What’s
Happening to ME!!?? (1981, Rev. 2007)

What was THAT All About? (1995, Rev. 2008)

Where the Hell Art Thou Romeo (1992, Rev. 2008)

1
2
Copyright 2013 Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D.

All Rights Reserved

1st Edition 2013

Published by Talking Hearts

ISBN: 978-0-9840170-0-3

Graphics provided by istockphoto user plumbeer, #’s 20752868, 20732615

For all U.S. and International book orders and consultations with Michael J.
Lincoln, Ph.D. visit our website at www.talkinghearts.net or write to P.O.
Box 194, Cool, CA 95614

3
The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or psychological
recommendations or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of
treatment for medical or psychological problems. The intent of the author is
only to offer information of a general nature to help the enhancement of
your well-being in your quest for effective functioning. In the event you use
any of the information in this book for yourself, the author and publisher
assume no responsibility for your decisions.

All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced,
stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or
by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or
otherwise), without the prior written permission of both the copyright
owner and the publisher of this book.

The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book via the Internet or
via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal and
punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions or
published copies and do not participate in or encourage electronic piracy of
copyrightable materials. Your support of the author(s) is appreciated.

Messages From the Body: Their Psychological Meaning

4
5
6
Copyright 2013 Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D.

All Rights Reserved

7
1st Edition 2013
Published by Talking Hearts

ISBN: 978-0-9840170-0-3

For all U.S. and International book orders and consultations with Michael J.
Lincoln, Ph.D. visit our website at www.talkinghearts.net or write to P.O.
Box 194 Cool, CA 95614

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or psychological
recommendations or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of
treatment for medical or psychological problems. The intent of the author is
only to offer information of a general nature to help the enhancement of
your well-being in your quest for effective functioning. In the event you use
any of the information in this book for yourself, the author and publisher
assume no responsibility for your decisions.

All rights reserved. This book, or parts thereof, may not be reproduced,
stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or
by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or
otherwise), without the prior written permission of both the copyright
owner and the publisher of this book.

The scanning, uploading, and distribution of this book via the Internet or
via any other means without the permission of the publisher is illegal and
punishable by law. Please purchase only authorized electronic editions or
published copies and do not participate in or encourage electronic piracy of
copyrightable materials. Your support of the author(s) is appreciated.

8
Messages From the Body: Their Psychological Meaning

Copyright

ii

9
10
Introduction

11
12
13
Introduction

14
Bodily functioning is a continuous adaptation process to our external and
internal environments that is operated by the brain, which in turn reflects
the contents of the mind, the emotions, and the soul.

The key factor in the maintenance of bodily health is the immune system,
which is controlled by the brain via neural connections, chemical reactions,
neurotransmitters, lymphocytes, neurohormones, endorphins, and the like.

Through these linkages, what is going on in our consciousness is

continuously affecting our body -- and vice versa. In many ways, the body
and the mind imitate and imprint each other.

Ultimately, of course, consciousness underlies and is the final determinant

of everything, and the body reflects this vividly. It should be noted in this
regard that “consciousness” will be used here to refer to both aware and
unaware processes and phenomena, as well as what is happening in our
brains and in our souls.

What is in our consciousness is determined by our life experiences and by

the nature and history of our soul. We design our destiny, and then we
encounter the interaction between ourselves and the world around us. And
we react to what happens.

For instance, one way in which illnesses and such can happen is when the
individual’s life goals are not being met. The individual then feels so
frustrated that bodily functioning goes awry. Their consciousness then
becomes permeated with this process.

The resultant in such a situation is that the particular interpretations and

interventions that the individual exhibits about this issue are reflective of
the agitated state of their consciousness.

That in turn, shows up in the form of the disorder that develops. The illness,
ailment or damaged condition then reflects the goal-thwarting impacts from
our environment, and/or it reflects the effects of our efforts to try to get by
without dealing with our goal(s).

15
The key factor in all this is the “thought form” or pattern of consciousness
in the mind and soul, which affects the body via the processes described
above. And when something is awry in our consciousness, the body is the
place where our consciousness problem; that is precipitating the disorder, is
played out.

Illnesses, ailments, disorders and damages in our bodies therefore represent

the final warning system regarding the things in which we are caught up
that are causing us significant, serious, and perhaps even lethal outcomes.
These “Messages From The Body” point to what needs to be tracked and
modified in our emotional/cognitive/behavioral/evaluational/spiritual
system.

Symptoms and syndromes (clusters of symptoms) express what we are

unconscious of, as well as what we are “shoving into our shadow.” The
“shadow” is that part of us where things that were (or are) not acceptable to
us and/or to those around us are relegated.

This is especially true during the intensely impressionable childhood

period, where at the beginning in particular, we tend to put God’s face on
the parents and other significant caretakers and relationships.

What the symptoms and syndromes of illness and disorders often represent,
then, is a de-evolution of a “shadow-shoving” process, in which we are
refusing to integrate our qualities or needs into our consciousness and lives,
due to severely repressive, suppressive, exploitative and/or abusive
reactions to these aspects of our nature when we were children.

There is an old saying to the effect that “As a person thinketh, so they shall
be.” In other words, what is in our consciousness determines the way our
life goes. And that gets started in childhood. This means that how one
handles one’s core themes determines who and how one will become.

Some example core themes here are things like self-support, belonging,
being safe, getting love, needing validation, being responsible, knowing and
understanding, mutual support, honesty, perfection, being able to love,
being able to have, cultural and community commitment, being without
doing, attention input, abandonment, cosmic connection, etc.

16
A major source of bodily malaise is the impact of one’s negative
experiences on the neurotransmitter conditions that result from formative
processes. Chronic and/or repeated traumatic experience patterns have
specific impacts on the individual’s neurotransmitters that tend to last the
lifetime.

Specifically, what has been found is that:

1) Dopamine is lowered by joy-deprivation.

1. Norepinepherine is elevated by fear-and/or rage-induction.

2. Endorphine is lowered by love-deprivation.

4) Serotonin is lowered by status-deprivation and powerlessness-induction.

Illnesses and disorders are linked to beliefs and changes of beliefs about
oneself, about the nature of one’s relationships with others, about one’s
position in the social world, and about where one stands in relation to the
Universe. And these, in turn, are determined by one’s life experiences, by
one’s interventions in the world, and by one’s soul history.

Things like the love or lack of love, joy and meaningful sexual contact that
one has experienced, via such things as having undergone oppression,
emotional conflict and trauma, the role of expectations and their play-outs,
social acceptance or rejection experiences, having the feeling that one is
able or unable to impact on the environment and the nature of one’s quality
of life, etc., are key factors here.

Such processes as not feeling a part of a social unit, not feeling valuable and
valued, being caught up in loneliness, undergoing deep longing and
frustration, traumatic patterns and being under the spell of unresolved
detrimental residuals from infancy and childhood have the effect of causing
disturbances in one’s consciousness.

Living through uncontrollable stress, social instability, lack of resources, or

failed ambitions, encountering conflicting signals from important others
around crucial matters, having to deal with unexpected threats, finding
oneself ensnared in compulsive and addictive behavior, and experiencing

17
social rejection, isolation, devaluation and alienation also cause
consciousness problems.

All of these, along with issues like learned helplessness, feelings of

weakness, victimization, incompetence and lack of control and/or power,
and the experience of rejection by or alienation from the Cosmos are the
things that generate negative thoughts and emotions such as grief, fear,
despair, guilt, resentment, nihilism, cynicism, hostility, greed, hate,
unforgivingness, pride, cruelty, narcissism and ignorance.

These kinds of difficulties suppress the immune system by generating and

maintaining negative self-reactions and beliefs about one’s
position/situation in the world. The mental thoughts and emotional patterns
that most often precipitate disease and disorder in the body are criticism,
anger, resentment, guilt, shame, grief and fear.

Criticism arises from a feeling of wanting to hands-on control everything,

due to a childhood in which such control was critical for cosmic acceptance,
physical and/or emotional survival, family protection, sense of worth,
quality of life, etc. When this “control-mania” occurs, it results in disorders
in which the environmental impact systems are affected, such as arthritis.

Anger comes from experiencing obstacles that can’t be overcome, and the
resulting impasse ends up in our turning from seeking to remove the
obstacle to attacking other people, the environment, and the Universe. This
tends to lead to conditions that emphasize infections, boils, burning, fevers
and inflammations.

Resentment is based on a feeling of victimization and powerlessness, and it

turns into smoldering fires that eat and fester away at the body, until
diseases like cancer and tumors develop.

Guilt is anger turned against the self, with a resulting self-attacking. It leads
to self-punishment and pain. Self-hobbling illnesses like emphysema and
herpes are the result.

Shame is generalized guilt, and the attack that results from shame is on the
general self-sustenance systems. As a result, it ends up in disorders of the

18
life support system, such as the blood, the liver, and the immune system.

Grief is the reaction to loss and deprivation, and its expression involves the
entire respiratory system, along with the fluid treatment systems such as the
kidneys and the bladder. Suppressed grief therefore produces such things as
lung problems, ear infections, and sinus difficulties, as well as heart
problems.

Fear activates the adrenal system for all-out emergency action. It suppresses
the vegetative systems such as digestion, regarding them as being of less
importance during the emergency. Chronic fear thus tends to result in things
like stomach and intestinal disorders, along with diseases of the kidneys and
the bladder.

Physical symptoms arise from the condition of the individual’s body, as

generated by the negative thoughts the individual characteristically has, that
shape their life and experiences through constant repetition.

They also represent the body trying to do things that the individual
won’t/can’t/isn’t manifesting and/or patterns that the family of origin forced
upon them. Environmental influences like diet, bacteria/viruses, pollens,
pollutants, etc. operate as the precipitant or “trigger” for the already loaded
and aimed “gun.” So are the events that produce traumas and assaults, such
as falls, accidents, violence, losses, etc.

Current intensely emotionally loaded situations tend to precipitate disorders

that heal quickly in response to interventions, though they will go on to
generate physical ailments/complications if the condition-of-consciousness
warnings are not heeded.

Meanwhile, chronic stress-producing and on-going emotional meaning

pattern problems grind away at the body till it breaks down. These illness
and disorders tend to take longer to heal, and to require more intensive
interventions.

It should also be noted that this whole disorder-precipitating process pretty

much centers around what we think of as “unconscious” phenomena that

19
are out of awareness, that are beyond our conscious control, and/or that are
continuously indirectly influencing what happens in our lives.

They reflect aspects of ourselves and of our lives that are so threatening to
us or that were so threatening to those around us in our formative period
that we had to repress them from our awareness.

Another situation that arises is where we have the operation of forces

emanating from the soul or essence of the individual that influence the
manifestation of unconscious motivations, interpretations and interventions
in interaction with environmental phenomena.

Such things as accidental death, violence perpetrated on us, abortions, etc.

reflect the intentions of the soul, showing up as either unconscious
motivations and/or as externals that precipitate these outcomes.

All experiences are stored in the soul, and the soul also receives the karma
for any cosmic contributions or cosmic transgressions. Consequently, some
disorders and intense events are karmic resolutions. Congenital disorders
are often of this nature.

One example of this type of thing is where marks or sores on the body often
indicate soul memories that are “scarring” the soul. They require
replacement with more positive programming via experiences in this life,
and the marks or sores serve as a “catalyst message” to this effect. One’s
life goals as selected by the soul frequently reflect the need for “cosmic
resolutions” of this sort.

Situations where external events and forces are operative in a manner that is
not under our control or that are not directly in our consciousness, but
which precipitate physical problems (such as work environment disorders)
come from our unconscious in this way. They are the resultants of our soul
needs and our inner motivations and interpretations interacting with the
environmental phenomena around us.

Still another aspect of the processes involved in the production of illnesses

and disorders by seemingly impersonal and independent causations are

20
things like intense cold and other passing external stimuli that seem to us to
be the full and total explanation of responses like sneezes.

However, it is true that these, too, are reflective of the underlying state of
being of the individual, in the sense that we often experience such stimuli
without reacting to them with sneezes, colds or whatever when there is not
such an underlying disturbance operative.

It should be noted that there are three general correspondences with broad
causative processes in life that are located in the body tissues. These tissues
are composed of the bones, the soft tissues, and the fluids.

The bones are our fundamental support system and the foundation of our
existence. It should not be too surprising, therefore, to learn that the bones
reflect our deepest issues, and they are the representatives of our cosmic
self, our spiritual foundation, and our relationship with the Universe.

The soft tissues such as the muscles and/organs, on the other hand,
represent our thinking processes, parameters and phenomena, as well as
what we are thinking. “As a person thinketh,” so their soft tissues go.

Finally, the fluids of the body, especially the blood, are manifestations of
our emotional processes and operations, along with our feelings about
things. That includes the interpretation and meaning-achieving and -
attributing system.

Breakdowns in these three tissue types will be very clearly manifesting the
situation in these three arenas and areas of our being. The linkages involved
are the resultant of one or more of four different processes. Some are the
outcome of the direct physiological effects of the mental/ emotional/soul
determinants and precipitants of the disorder, such as the “fight or flight”
reaction.

Others come from the indirect physical resultants of the

mental/emotional/soul outcomes of the individual’s interpretations and
interventions in their lives, as in the “Oh my God!” or “So that means. . .”
reactions that precipitate physical effects in the body.

21
Still others consist of mediated impacts via the mental/emotional/soul
processes that flow along the meridian system of the body that oriental
medicine is so familiar with. Here the effect is to alter our auric field in a
manner that affects our physical body.

Finally, others are the outcome of direct “thought form”-generated symbolic

representations of the person’s pictures of their situation and the meanings
they give the circumstances that show up as bodily metaphors of their
interpretation for the person.

The more systems that are involved in a disorder that, when they are
decoded, are saying the same thing, the more important it is that the
message be heeded and that actions are taken to change the situation and the
consciousness associated with it.

Every condition in our lives exists because there is a need for it in one way
or another, either on the time-space level or on the soul level or both. The
symptoms, reactions or conditions are the outward effect of the inner
condition of the individual.

A specific sickness is the natural physical outcome of particular thought

patterns and/or emotional disharmonies. They are coded messages from the
body to the effect of what is happening and what needs to happen. In effect,
then, illnesses and ailments teach us, expand us, and move us on -- if we
can understand them and heed them.

There is a kind of “escalation chain” effect involved in this matter of

consciousness distortions showing up in the body’s malfunctioning. It starts
out as psychological phenomena such as disturbing thoughts, wishes,
fantasies, intentions, interpretations or repressions.

If these are ignored, avoided or resisted, it then moves to mild disruptions

of our functioning such as fatigue, irritation reactions, or sleep pattern
disruptions. If the situation continues to not be heeded, it then moves to
acute physical disturbances like inflammations, wounds and minor
accidents.

22
If we still don’t get the message and we persist in the pattern of
consciousness/functioning that is causing the problem, we move on to
chronic conditions, where we receive a lasting reminder of our situation.

If we still stubbornly refuse to acknowledge our problem and to adjust our

consciousness, the soul and/or the Cosmos will precipitate traumatic events
such as accidents, assaults, lightening strikes, and the like.

If all this fails, the situation deteriorates into irreversible physical changes
or incurable processes. The individual then proceeds to descend into such
outcomes as cancer or degenerative disorders like “Lou Gehrig’s disease”
or AIDS.

If the individual continues in their patterns even then, this development

leads to death, the ultimate acknowledgment that we are not a separate “I”
in a strictly physical world. We are conscious beings in a sea of
consciousness, where the requirement is to be “at one with the One.”

It should be noted that all illnesses and disorders are based on the same
source: a deep sense of separation from God. The situation of being in a
physical body in time-space lays the ground work for this experience, and it
then is exaggerated/exacerbated by non-optimal life experiences.

In effect, we feel at the deep unconscious level that “it’s all our fault” and
that we are “getting our just desserts,” with the result that we respond with
mental/emotional reactions that result ultimately in bodily breakdowns. The
disorder then brings our attention to the particular ways in which we feel
separated and isolated from the Cosmos, and to the interpretations and
interventions that arise from this.

Incidentally, an excellent resource for understanding how this all works and
how to work with the information that comes from the meanings of the
diseases and disruptions is “Feelings Buried Alive Never Die...” by Karol
K. Truman.

In effect, when we are afflicted with a physical disorder, what we are being
told in no uncertain terms is that this dysfunctional way of being must go.

23
The meaning of bodily breakdowns, then, can in effect be succinctly
summarized in three words:

CHANGE THAT PATTERN!

The “prudent person’s” reaction to all this is to accept and understand what
the disturbance is telling us, as well as heeding its implications for changes
in our consciousness. If we resist, avoid, deny or continue to pursue the
“settle-for- substitutes” for resolutions and solutions to the consciousness
problem, our symptoms will persist or worsen.

The basic reality here is that awareness heals. Tuning into and taking
seriously the implications for changes in our consciousness manifestation
are the “way to fly” when dealing with illnesses and disorders.

This doesn’t mean, of course, that one doesn’t do corrective interventions

directly on the bodily effects of the conflict. It just means that in addition to
the corrective efforts, you also go after the underlying source of the
problem in your consciousness.

The process is like working from one side of a mountain on symptom

treatment, while simultaneously working from the other side on the
underlying emotional/mental/Cosmic issues. The two then meet in the
middle, resulting in a permanent termination of the disorder after a greatly
accelerated healing.

Section 1

24
Messages from the Body

Introduction

25
Messages from the Body

10

26
This is a brief note regarding how to utilize the information contained in the
“Dictionaries” written by Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D. These books were
composed from scientific literature, clinical experience, life learning, inner
knowing and other-dimensional sources. As a result, they make rather
audacious and at times seemingly off-the-wall statements regarding what is
happening when an individual is experiencing one of the indicators of what
is going on for them when they encounter a “disruption” in their life. This
makes the “Dictionaries” rather difficult to work with at times.

What follows are some recommendations regarding how to proceed with

the information contained in the “Dictionaries,” particularly in reference to
situations where the information doesn’t seem to fit the circumstances or the
person, or where it is hard to know what the information indicates.

First of all, it needs to be said that the task here is to PUT IT IN

CONTEXT. These items are general purpose, and they must be related to
the particulars of the situation in which they come up for the person.

They are basic generic statements of the pattern and dynamics of the
disruption in the person’s life. It is imperative that they therefore be
interpreted in terms of the individual’s situation, so as to be understandable
and utilizable there.

Then there is the problem of the generic experiential histories presented.

They frequently do not seem to fit the overall situation or the actual facts of
the life history of any given individual.

The way to deal with this is to remember that the “histories” are given as a
way of coming to comprehend that the problematic pattern described
regarding the disruption is a natural resultant of understandable processes,
not some flaw in their soul, some accident of nature or some in-born “bad
seed” pathology.

The items are designed to generate compassionate comprehension --

whether for you or for the one who is experiencing the dynamics and
circumstances involved in the problem.

27
The reality is that we don’t need to know the exact history of circumstances,
events and environmental influences that led to the individual’s having the
dynamics involved. We do need to know that it all makes sense of some
sort, and that making sense of it is healing of the problem and healing for
the person.

What happens when this material is read is that the person’s “inner child,”
who had to take whatever happened to them in their formative process as
“God’s Gospel Truth” from the “Horse’s Mouth, the Source Itself,” comes
to understand how it all started.

What was actually taking place is that normally or abnormally flawed

human beings were trying to cope with the huge impact of this new person
on a 24/7/365 basis, with inevitable failures and harms. We in effect
reached for God, and we got God“(zilla)” in one form or another. So we end
up thinking God is some 24-story tall Tyrannosaurus Rex going around
eating New York and looking for YOU.

We think that God is infallible so we therefore deserved the events we

underwent. This book is designed to switch on the light so that you see the
emperor’s new clothes, and that was God(zilla) and not God. The postulated
histories are designed to turn that light on.

A second major difficulty is when the description of the dynamics and

processes involved do not seem to fit the overt nature of the person’s
personality, functioning patterns or history.

One source of this difficulty is that the descriptions are “set to medium
level” in their intensity and implications. You may have to “tone down” the
description or “amp up” the description to get a better fit to the situation.
The important thing here is to understand the dynamics, not necessarily to
have the description fit exactly in the person’s life on the overt level.

The other source of this difficulty is that often the dynamics being referred
to or described are taking place on some other level in the person’s
functioning. One such situation is where the dynamics and issues are
reflecting the state and intensity of the pattern setting circumstances at the

28
point of the formative process of the dynamics, rather than what they are
currently or have historically manifested overtly.

Such a situation means that the person is in effect “back to the beginning”
so as to finally heal it, and they are therefore re-experiencing the original
situation internally so as to clear it out of their dynamics for once and for
all.

The way this works is a “peeling the onion” process in which the individual
works their way back from the most recently acquired wounds till they
arrive at the point where the issue/experience/ interpretation in question
comes up full force.

This involves a primordial part of the person which went into action when
they first encountered the experience that “God is angry with me”
somewhere along the way from conception to about age three.

It arises because we are hard-wired to believe that everything that comes to

us in that foundational developmental period is the truth, the whole truth
and nothing but the truth about whom and what we are.

We then think we have to get the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” so

as to “save our soul,” and the “inner child” commences to seek to achieve
that outcome by doing what “God” (actually “God(zilla)” -- the parent(s)
being caught up in their own unfinished business and/or trying
circumstances at the time) the parent(s) seems to demand.

The purpose is for the person’s “inner child” (who did not have mental
equipment operating at the time of the wound) to be activated, so as to
“educate Rita” about what it was REALLY all about with the now available
full mental and experiential equipment to be able to do so.

Items will therefore sometimes reflect an on going representation of the

original internal experience in the current context in order to free the person
from the beliefs and agonies that were generated in the absence of any real
understanding of what was going on back then. By far the most common
inference/conclusion drawn is that it was all their fault and God said so.

29
This “illusional conclusion” produces the “three steps forward, two and a
half steps back” phenomenon that is experienced as, “I have met the enemy
and it is me!” Sometimes, therefore, the dynamics for the disruption pattern
are referring to what is happening for their “inner child” at this particular
point in the person’s life.

If that is the case, it means that the issues and areas involved are now
pushing for healing, and that the “inner child” needs compassionate
comprehension and assistance in healing the wounds of their early
formative process.

The dynamics described in the item give the necessary information as to

what is happening and what needs healing around their relationship with
themselves and around their relationship with the “Home Office” from way
back when.

This process can result in the item characterizing the person in a manner
that flies in the face of their subsequently developed functioning,
understanding and experience. The way to handle this is to go back to what
was happening at the time the “illusional conclusions” were instilled and to
sort it out, along with releasing the dammed up emotions and
anxieties/angers/despairs generated at the time.

In such a situation, the item clarifies the person’s reaction to what was
happening to them at the time, as a function of the limitations of the mental
equipment of the “inner child.” It explains what’s been bugging them all
along, so they can liberate themselves from the ancient pattern and get on
with their life with fully operative equipment unhampered by “ghosts of
Christmases past.”

Another situation that happens often is where the dynamics being described
are those involved in their “shadow.” This is where some aspects of the
person’s soul and/or biologic beingness were not allowed to manifest as a
child, and these aspects were therefore “shoved into their shadow.” The
aspects then become distorted by being shunned and shunted like this. The
item then serves as an indicator of this “shadow-clearing” process going on.

30
When you are encountering the effects of a “shadow aspect” of this nature,
the implication is to find what the “shadow aspect” is a distortion of, to find
what was not allowed and which is now pushing for acknowledgement,
validation, acceptance and manifestation.

The trick here is not to try to “treat the symptom” -- either the disruption
reflecting the situation or the “shadow aspect” manifestation. You work on
releasing the underlying “shadow-shoved” self-beingness into full
manifestation in their life.

You do repair the car, handle the medical problem, or whatever, as a

practical matter. But that is not where the action is, and if you don’t take
care of the underlying cause, it will result in further disruptions until it is
worked with.

For instance, suppose the disruption is pointing to an underlying rage that

the individual is working with. Yet the person is a kind, gentle, wise and
loving individual who is anything but rageful to all appearances.

What is going on here is that they were forced to shove their personal
power and potency into their “shadow,” where it turned into an incessant
rage about being so suppressed and distorted that is always pushing to be
released.

You don’t start accusing the person of being a rageful phony, and you don’t
start working on rage-reduction, unless the individual is showing the need
to find positive anger-release methods per se.

What you DO, do is work with them to release their personal power and
potency so that they can impact effectively in the world, and so that they
can then manifest their full nature, contribution and destiny.

Still another way in which there may be a mismatch between the

individual’s overt or consciously knowable functioning and experience, on
the one hand, and the dynamics description of the disruption in the item on
the other, is when what is being dealt with is early formative experiences
that never got handled or dealt with before.

31
When this occurs, it is like a “lawn rake,” where you have a nice line of cut
grass clippings you’ve already raked up, and you notice a big clump way
back at the beginning that you forgot.

So you have to go back and bring that clump up in line with the rest of your
life. And the dynamics description points you in the right direction, as well
as indicating the time period of your development that needs work now.

One more way in which a seeming “mismatch” between the item contents
and the person’s situation can occur is where what is being referred to is the
process of healing itself, in terms of its effects on the individual’s emotional
dynamics and functioning at present.

That is, the dynamics of the disruption being described are in reference to
the processes and impacts of the healing process on the individual’s
experience and manifestation. In other words, the emotions and dynamics
activated by the person’s undergoing the healing of the original damage can
have disruptive effects of their own.

You then see the implications regarding what the individual is experiencing
on the unconscious emotional level, and you work to alleviate that and the
resultants of the original damage that are creating this disruptive outcome
simultaneously.

Of course, on some occasions for whatever reason, the description of the

dynamics involved for the disruption are just plain wrong. After all,
psychological and spiritual dynamics are not the only factors involved in
the disruptions that occur in life. As Freud said in his last interview,
“Sometimes gentlemen a cigar, is nothing but a cigar.”

One common situation where this occurs is when the individual is either a
very seasoned old soul and/or they have pretty much handled most of their
damage repair. In such situations, the normal context of the human
condition is not happening, and the events in their life activate unusual
reactions from their body or whatever.

The other major difficulty that will on occasion arise when reading the
items is the “So -- so what?” reaction. This is the problem of translating the

32
abstractions into actions. This is sometimes raised as a request for there to
be added to the “Dictionary” additional information for each item regarding
intervention or correction.

In addition to the already out-of-hand problem of size of the “Dictionary” in

most cases, this suggestion runs into another issue, which is that the actual
process of handling the dynamics underlying the description is totally
unique to each person’s situation.

Consequently, to try and cover all possible ways of dealing with the
dynamics involved would lead to a book of encyclopedic proportions for
each “Dictionary,” and it STILL wouldn’t handle the need because of the
multi-dimensional uniqueness factor. The reality is that “awareness heals”
in idiosyncratically manifesting ways all by itself, largely on the
subconscious and holographic level.

Since the disruptions are reflections of underlying dynamics and

fundamental “premises” that the individual is working with and needing to
work on, specific symptom intervention techniques are not the place where
the action is. It is in the emotional and mental bodies of the individual, as
well as in their soul and destiny dynamics. As such, the problem needs to be
addressed on that level in the “awareness heals” manner.

If there were a kind of universal principle on how to utilize the information

in the “Dictionaries,” it would be to discern what the foundational
“premise” and early emotional wound in their relationship with
“God(zilla)” are that have shaped their formative and subsequent
experiential history.

These are things like “God is angry with me,” “I caused World War II,” “I
don’t deserve to exist,” “People are no damned good,” “I am unfit for
human consumption,” “I am unlovable,” “I am worthless,” “Nothing makes
any sense,” etc.

Once you have a handle on the premise(s), you know roughly what is up for
healing and what is causing the disruption. Then you work on reversing the
premise(s) by whatever ways are appropriate for the person and their
situation/process/point in their development/destiny via the “awareness

33
heals” processes. And this almost never involves admonitions, accusations
and acrimonious attacks or simple formulas like, “Just do it!,” “Tell
yourself not to do it” or “Just say no!” It just doesn’t work that way.

What usually is helpful is to alert yourself or the person involved to the

underlying premise(s), and then to search out the Truth that is based on a lot
of personal experience the individual has had, and which is trying to “get
out of prison” now in such a way as to cause the disruption.

For instance, if they have an “IT’S NOT ALLOWED!” premise, the Truth
is that “It is required by God, by common sense, by human decency and
your needs!” The past was, period!

It served its purpose, and it is now time to collect the gifts in the garbage
and to start sharing what you have learned from it.

One way to approach this whole issue is the direct route. That is, you turn
the alternative to the foundational premise into an affirmation which the
individual repeatedly reminds themselves of, meditates on, and puts in their
environment, like on the bathroom mirror, the refrigerator, the car, etc.

It is important to be careful how you word the affirmation, though. It should

be generic and Universally serving, rather than some specific and selfish or
unilateral goal statement. Remember, you will get just exactly what you put
out there, so be conscious as you formulate it.

It is also helpful to examine situations, events, routines, relationships,

processes, motivations, etc, in terms of how they relate to and are affected
by the foundational premise and by the alternative affirmation. By making
the whole thing a major focus, it helps to heal the issue.

Another way to heal the problem is to start studying when the fundamental
premise and its behavioral/functional effects show up in your personal life,
and then to start using “awareness training” to facilitate its retirement as no
longer being needed.

“Awareness training” is where you as soon as possible notice that the

premise dynamic functioning has showed up again. And then you give

34
yourself a meaningful reward of self-congratulation and whatever else feels
and is good for you for noticing it!

You do NOT beat yourself up for doing it again! You pay yourself off for
noticing and being aware of it. This will give you both experiential
validation that you are on the right track and the resulting awareness of
functioning precipitation patterns. You will see what sets you off, what the
situations that set you off have in common, and how they relate to the
foundational premise and to the alternative affirmation.

If you keep doing this, you will find that the time between doing it and
noticing that you did it gets shorter and shorter in a hurry. You get to the
point where you notice it in midstream.

Sometimes you can stop working on it at that point and sometimes not. If
you do terminate here, give yourself an extra reward for your
accomplishment as well as for noticing again.

Eventually, you will notice it at the onset of the process, and then you will
get to the place where you notice it at the intention point. When you have
arrived there, you will have reached the goal of self-regulation on the
pattern.

If you are also inserting the alternative affirmation to the foundational

premise while you are doing this, you will be amazed at how fast the pattern
disappears and the disruption goes away.

The reason for this is that the disruption pattern came to your attention in
the first place because it was time for healing the dynamic. This fact, in
conjunction with the effectiveness of “awareness training” and “alternative
affirmations,” makes for a highly impactful change process.

Still another way to work with the information is to study how the premise
dynamic and functioning pattern works in your life. If the relationship is
symbolic and indicative of the “truth” of the foundational premise so that
each instance is further “proof” of the premise, this can be worked on with
the alternative affirmation.

35
If the dynamic and functioning pattern is serving some purpose for you in
its present process, see what you can do to meet the need(s) that the
dynamic and its resultants serve, and look for better, more effective and
non-destructive ways that those needs can be met.

Finally, one interesting way in which the “Dictionaries” have been applied
is to read the dynamics for the disruptive pattern you are experiencing to
see if it fits with you. If it does, work on it in the ways described above.

But if it doesn’t and the dynamic and history are way off base, this might
indicate that you are not going to have to experience the full impacts and
implications of the disruptive pattern.

If that is the case, it then tells you that you don’t have to work on that
dynamic because in all likelihood it isn’t there, and you can focus your
energy on finding what else might be happening here.

For instance, if you don’t have the dynamics for cancer but you got it
anyway, it might be indicative of a psychic attack or of a genetic/familial
vulnerability or of a self-endangering process that has led to a natural
consequence outcome, or whatever.

Incidentally, one interesting application of the item content in the case of a

psychic attack is to be aware that the attacker will invariably do their dirty
work on the basis of their own dynamics and issues. In other words, they
will seek to generate in others what they themselves are struggling with.
That, in turn, can be helpful in identifying who is doing the attacking.

This is admittedly not a whole lot of information on how to deal with the
data of the “Dictionaries.” The reality is that it is in effect something of an
art form that relies heavily upon a lot of information about a lot of things
and on the skillful use of intuition, insight and inputs from other
dimensions. But like any art form, it can be learned, improved upon, and
even passed on to others.

A final hint. The “Dictionaries” were written by “talking” through the

typewriter. As a result, it is almost imperative that when you read the
description or information on the item(s), you should do so out LOUD --

36
even if you are by yourself. It does not follow the information patterns of
written English, and it speaks more directly to your soul, so to speak. If you
read the items aloud with “radio inflections” you have the experience of
being spoken to, rather than of “reading” something. It should be done with
verve, caring and connection. Try it. You’ll find that you get much more out
of it. What happens is that the “inner child” in both you and the person
being read to really hears when you do this.

Working with the “Dictionaries” is very much like the motto of the 12-Step
programs, in which they say something like, “Take what you need and leave
the rest.” The purpose of the “Dictionaries” is to provide a “translator” or a
“decoder” of what the spin offs from the condition of the emotional body
are saying.

As such, it is really required that you re-build the social and life history
information in the items to fit the
emotional/cognitive/mental/functional/soul dynamics you find or already
know about the person involved.

You also need to update the data to fit the current situation and culture the
individual is immersed in, especially with younger people or children, who
are displaying the effects of the rapidly evolving cultural and human
condition situation.

Another special consideration is when the emotional body conditions that

are generating the “Dictionary” item symptoms are the resultant of a
transitional and/or transformational process going on in the individual’s life
space, such as the healing undertaking itself.

When faced with rapidly developing change, profound healing, emerging

characteristics or other change process parameters, you need to fit what you
read to the situation, so that you can find the emotional body process that
needs your attention and intervention right now.

In other words, it works best to place the information you derive from the
“Dictionaries” on the “back burner processor,” rather than going right into
the “sleeve-rolling mode” or into an action-activation intervention pattern.
Let it brew with the awareness process for a while.

37
What happens when you do this is that the information coagulates, congeals
and agglutinates to lead to very helpful insights that gradually speed up the
healing and/or transition/transformation process.

When working with the “Dictionaries” it is like the symptoms or problems

are on one side of a mountain and your compassionate comprehension is on
the other. So you handle the symptoms in a problem-solving manner, while
at the same time, you “educate Rita” as to what it all means. Both processes
then simultaneously bore through the mountain and meet in the middle,
with no relapses.

Section 2

Helpful Hints for Working with MJL’s “Dictionaries”

38
Introduction

Helpful Hints for Working with MJL’s “Dictionaries”

11

39
12

13

14

15

16

17

18

40
The disorders listed below are those for which the underlying negative
thought forms, emotional reactions, life histories, predispositional factors,
and precipitating events-circumstances have been found in the literature and
in the author’s experience.

It should be noted that the life histories postulated here for the various
illness and disorders represent generic dynamics-generating situation
descriptions. They may or may not directly fit the situation for any given
individual, which are usually much more complex and idiosyncratic in their
nature than what is contained in the items.

The items are put in as an understanding device to convey a compassionate

comprehension of the individual’s circumstances and outcomes for
purposes of amelioration and healing.

It should also be noted that the level of intensity of the symptoms implied
by their title, the degree of severity of the history given, and the magnitude
of the manifestation of the psychological dynamics displayed may all vary
considerably from person to person and from situation to situation.

These items, descriptions and interpretations are general “ballpark

estimates” of the phenomena involved, and they should be taken as the
essential meanings inherent in the situation, rather than as absolutely
specific, right-on descriptions of the details of the particular unique
circumstances you are seeking an understanding of.

Considerable adjustments may have to be made when interpreting a given

situation. In particular, there has to be major re-framing done when
interpreting disorders in children. The items have to be framed and worked
with in terms of the child’s age, nature and situation.

One more caution. While the prototypic learning histories clearly fault the
parenting that the individual received (and sometimes also the rest of the
family’s behavior), it should be kept in mind that this is not “parent-
bashing.”

41
The circumstances and cultural context of the isolated nuclear family of
today are so antithetical to the biologic human nature outcome of our
evolutionary history and our resulting needs that it is in effect guaranteed
that the parenting process will falter and fail along significant dimensions
almost universally. After all, if you put the screws to someone when they
are forming up, they end up screwed up.

Originally, we shared a “town commons” with a great deal of contact,

involvement and support from the whole community in meeting the needs
of the adults, the children, and the child-rearing process.

We now expect spouses and parents to in effect “do the impossible with
nothing” in many ways. And of course, we “fall on our faces” a lot as a
result. These postulated histories are just a catalogue of the various manners
in which that has happened.

In a way, this “decoding device dictionary” is a profound call for us to

“change that pattern” with regard to how we organize, prioritize and realize
everything as a species and as individuals. We are now in the process of
doing just that on the larger scale.

It should also be noted that for almost everyone, parenting errors of the type
described in this book are on the subconscious or unconscious level. Life is
rather overwhelming, especially in the isolated nuclear family in an urban
environment in today’s world.

So we err in our parenting. It is relatively rarely a situation of a malicious

parent getting a kick out of their harm-induction, though there are some
parents of this nature. But for the vast majority of us, it is a matter of
unfortunate outcomes of in effect impossible circumstances.

It should be noted that as a result of all this, the innermost and earliest
wounded part of the person will be experiencing the situation described in
the item, even if the person doesn’t manifest it overtly or experience it in
their conscious awareness. We are formed up early on, and then we have to
make corrections from then on.

42
One final comment about all this. At one level, this is a time-limited book.
That is because we are in the midst of the greatest evolutionary change in
human history. We are currently experiencing the “last grasp” of the
formative process of the human race, where primitivity of consciousness
has reigned supreme while we pinned down the basics of dealing with 3-D.

We have now collectively mastered that task, and we are in effect

“graduating” into the full manifestation of human potential and destiny
phase of our collective soul pool’s development. We are now going to be
coming from the heart and from wisdom -- after this
transition/transformation period is completed.

As a result of this, the isolated nuclear family in a selfish world will

disappear as a phenomenon, and almost all of these disorders will disappear.
They will be replaced by much more subtle and refined side effects of our
challenge-mastering process from then on.

Thus this book will eventually end up like an “anatomy of the Victorian
Era” -- a curious historical document. Until then, however, we will still
need the insights provided here about what happens when fundamental
human needs go unmet or are trampled over.

The next “how to” concerns the fact that humans are highly complex
beings. As a result, many of the items in this “Dictionary” have “multiple
characters” associated with them. This means that you will encounter a
meaning/character for an item, after which there will be a string of asterisks
below it. Then there will be another meaning/character, and so on. See
example below:

ABDOMINAL PAIN

“Up for grabs.” They are experiencing intense survival-anxiety and

concerns over whether they can really handle life. There is a strongly felt
powerlessness arising from “skid row” programming and learned
helplessness in the face of a severely dysfunctional family.

*************************************

43
“Virgo-ism.” They are trying to cover all the details, to organize and
coordinate everything, to analyze the situation and meet all needs in the
“right” way. The result is nit-picking perfectionism, detail-domination, and
an inability to see the forest for the trees.

What you do with these is to read the “caption/quote” at the beginning of

each one to get a hit as to what and who is involved. You select the ones(s)
that seem to fit for the individual you are reading about to arrive at a
liberating understanding of that person.

Now for the final bit of “how to” information regarding this “Dictionary.”
When reading the material to yourself or to others, it should be done in a
“radio reading” manner, complete with inflections, pauses, emphases,
colorfulness, etc. Just reading in a monotone will not embed the information
in your subconscious, where it can do its work. And for maximum
effectiveness, the reading to yourself and for others should be done out
loud. This really takes it to the core of the subconscious.

With this as a foundation for approaching the “decoding device dictionary,”

we hope you enjoy MESSAGES FROM THE BODY and get much
awareness from it.

Section 3

How to Use This “Dictionary”

44
Introduction

How to Use This “Dictionary”

19

45
20

21

Michael Lincoln discusses why it is so important to read definitions out

loud for maximum impact.

The Importance of Reading Aloud

46
47
It should be noted here that the opposite process also happens with regard to
the effect of the “thought forms” and emotional contents residing in our
consciousness. That is, things like reverence of self, faith in one’s ability
and right to survive, thrive and heal, self-love and self-acceptance, a sense
of the goodness of the self, self-commitment, trust in the operations of the
Cosmos, commitment to the community, etc., are all highly effective
preventatives and correctives for illnesses.

In addition, such activities as selfless service, using knowledge to help

others and to thereby to increase one’s own knowledge, caring for others,
being a part of a social support system, developing and maintaining a God-
connection, relaxation exercises, and self-hypnosis greatly strengthen the
immune system and generate physical health.

Healing is “wholing” -- manifesting all of our potentials and becoming one

with All That Is. It is restoring the integrated and flowing manifestational
process of being “at one with” the Cosmos in your consciousness and in
your way of being.

It is a process of finding what is needed and what has been systematically

kept unconscious for whatever reason, and then correcting your
consciousness in that area so that who you are reflects Who You Are.

Section 4

It Works the Other Way Too

48
Introduction

It Works the Other Way Too

22

49
50
Sometimes a rose is not necessarily a rose. This is a paper about the ins and
outs of “labeling,” of giving a name to a phenomenon and of applying the
name to specific instances and individuals.

Unfortunately, this often results in both misapplication of the labels and

abuses arising from the labels themselves. What follows is a brief
discussion of the nature and problems of the utilization of names for things,
especially as applied to people.

A major issue that is involved here is the problem of duality, the experience
of and living out of the notion that there are two distinctly different worlds
in the Cosmos -- the spiritual and the material. The idea is that we need to
keep these worlds separate, and that only material reality is real in any
practical sense.

This generates an approach in which control of one’s environment and

experiences become paramount, at the expense of everything else. In this
approach, labeling becomes a major tool of control, with little or no concern
for the larger effects of one’s utilization of labels.

This is an ancient issue, and it is related to the phenomenon of the One and
the Many. We are all “chips off the Old Hologram,” and so we are all One,
as they say. But creation is also composed of the vast multitude of
particulars that are the Many, who are here to expand their souls and the
Cosmos.

In order to function in the World of the Many, we need names and

identifying labels. While there are those who advocate the abandonment of
labels altogether, which is a Luddite prescription that would, if actually
applied, precipitate instant chaos.

The fact of the matter is that we simply have to use words to function in the
world and with each other, and sometimes we have to use words to describe
phenomena about ourselves and other people.

We need words and labels as the means we have to make sense of and to
order our environment, experiences and responsibilities. We also need

51
words to communicate with each other and to convey, store and retrieve
fundamental information. Words and symbols are the basis of meaning and
of functioning.

Unfortunately, though, as with everything else, words and symbols are a

double-edged sword. In today’s world of extreme materialism, cultural
decline before the Great Transformation, and the resulting intense
selfishness, disintegrity and sheer insensitivity, we are often subjected to the
dark side of words and labels.

The worst effect of this is “reification” -- the turning of concepts into the
experience of concrete, discrete, external and manipulable “things.” Things
with no soul, consciousness, experiences, or respectable value.

Words applied to people have this effect a great deal of the time. That in
turn, has the effect of dehumanizing them, disensouling them, and
depersonalizing them. Which leads to callous, calculating and cold lack of
concern for anything beyond what the “cipher” can do for you or what
“surfing the ciphers” can get you. It even leads to things like drive-by
shootings, torture, kidnapping and interrogating, and concentration camps.
The process takes many forms.

For instance, there is the “cookie cutter” phenomenon, in which integral

essences and whole systems are arbitrarily “cut up” into “cipher chunks”
and dealt with as if the “chunks” were the whole and the only reality there
is -- with often disastrous results to both the people so dealt with and to the
world at large, ultimately. Involved here are things like “welfare recipient,”
“student,” “ex-con,” “black,” “employee,” “customer,” “voter” and “them.”

Then there is the “distantiation effect” in which anyone with a label or

“that” label is instantly pushed away from your heart and soul as being a
“thing” to be dealt with at arm’s length or not at all.

This allows other things like manipulation and exploitation to be

undertaken with no qualms or even with no thought about what you are
doing. It also has the effect of activating actions like not granting loans,
taking people to court, sending people to jail, etc.

52
Another effect of labels is that they are strongly prone to be used to
maintain the status quo and the system/situation as it is. Labels are powerful
devices to sustain the class system and to “validate” your prejudices and
expectations of privilege. They also allow, elicit and justify judgments and
evaluations, with the resulting actions, labels used in this way are a highly
paranoid patriarchal process.

A very common phenomenon involved in label abuse is the “blame

boomerang,” in which you see something in another person that you hate in
yourself, and then you label them and attack them -- instead of yourself.

A closely related phenomenon is “projective identification,” in which you

feel an affinity-identity with someone, and then you label them on that basis
and act accordingly. These kinds of responses lead to much destructive
behavior and outcomes.

The most common negative outcomes of labeling are, however, the

processes of control, restriction and “boxing in.” We use them to “keep
people in their place.” And their “place” is highly subjectively and self-
servingly defined.

Labels then serve as justifications for our actions, as self-reassurances, and

as self-inflations. They can also operate as the tools of self-delusion, even
going to the full-fledged paranoid level, as in gang turfing and national
wars.

This all being the case, then, what are we to do? As was indicated, words,
symbols and labels are essential to our functioning. So how do we use them
without undue harm resulting?

The key on this is self-monitoring and ecological tracking. While labels are
essential, they are often thoughtlessly used. So track yourself as you are
using them, to see what the ultimate effects and results are.

In reality, labels are only useful when they are discerningly describing
processes, rather than “tagging things.” They should refer to ensouled
beings living life in an intensely complex, potentially dangerous, and ever
changing world.

53
A good way to carry this out is to work at “conscious projective
identification,” in which you identify with everyone you encounter as a
fellow important person, so that you afford them the respect, caring and
covering they deserve. In other words, reflect reality -- don’t reify.

As for how this relates to how to use this book, keep in mind that the people
being described in the different difficulties here are ensouled beings like
you, and that compassionate comprehension, not judgments, evaluations
and labels are the purpose of this “Dictionary.”

It is intended to convey what is happening to and within the people so that

you can understand and help them. It is a healing device. This applies
especially towards yourself when you are reading about what the difficulties
mean about you. Heal, don’t hurt.

Section 5

Speaking of Roses: A Lesson on Labeling

54
Introduction

Speaking of Roses: A Lesson on Labeling

23

55
24

25

56
This is a discussion of how Michael J. Lincoln is able to do what he does
and how he does it in arriving at the items in the numerous “Dictionaries”
of the meanings of things that he has written. It is also a presentation of the
thinking processes that can and if possible should be used in interpreting the
items in the “Dictionaries” by the user.

It is composed of two sections. The first will trace the development of the
capabilities and approach that he uses. The second will briefly discuss what
the processes and parameters that are involved in arriving at a
comprehensive comprehension of people.

With regard to the evolution of his approach to assessment, in addition to

the particular soul, genetic and life history qualities that make up who
Michael J. Lincoln is, there is a rather huge experiential history behind his
work in these books.

At the beginning of the whole thing was his professional training as a

clinical psychologist. It occurred in the late fifties and early sixties, and it
very strongly emphasized psychological assessment practice. He worked
with everything from college counseling to working with disturbed
veterans, the elderly, the psychotic and the mentally challenged.

Then he commenced his professional career by serving as the clinical

director of a revolutionary new approach to the treatment of emotionally
disturbed children in the mid-sixties. It was the application of Skinnerian
behaviorism in an open treatment program where the children went home
each weekend. (Skinnerian behaviorisms uses B.F. Skinner’s work on
learning from consequences with consequence-scheduling right after the
behavior occurs)

Within a few months, he found himself the clinical director of a riot. The
program was just not working, despite the application of everything that
had been done of this nature in the past with locked ward psychiatric
populations.

This forced him to develop a brand new approach to behavioral intervention

and to psychological assessment. It involved his doing “process recordings”

57
of everything the child did, along with everything that was happening
around the child. These records were then broken down into half-second
segments and analyzed for what was going on for, to and within the child.

The result was an in-depth understanding of the person and their needs that
was then communicated to the staff. The net effect was an almost scary
effectiveness of the program. He called it the “Los Alamos of psychology”
at the time, in reference to the gigantic implications of what was being
discovered, and to the dangers of the misapplication of that knowledge.

Then when this was well under way, he turned the behavioral assessment
process onto the child therapists as they did their work, and he co-wrote a
book with the child therapy supervisor of the program on how child therapy
works (“So You Want To Work With Kids?”), and on the components of
successful child treatment by child care workers. This led to his training
such child and youth workers in their profession.

He was also required by law to do full-fledged psychological assessments of

all the children in the program. He did this in a manner that combined the
best of his assessment training with his behavioral assessment skills. The
result was profound comprehension of each person. This led to the agency’s
being requested by the State of Oregon to assess the needs of all kinds of
emotionally disturbed children, for purposes of designing a treatment
continuum for them. Everyone from neurotics to hyperactives, to the brain-
damaged the mentally disturbed chained to the walls to murderers to
severely suicidal children to autistics and psychotics were in-depth assessed
by Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D. and by the entire agency, resulting in
exhaustive detailing of their entire situation, nature and needs.

Out of all this evolved a number of things, two of which will be mentioned
here. One was that there grew from all this experience an ability to read
people’s faces that was based on this intense assessment work. He went on
to train people in this process.

The other thing that evolved was his coming to understand the formation
and operation of the human personality. It became a two-part system --
“developmental arrests” in the first two years of life, on the one hand, and

58
“life scripts” that were caused by the role the child played in their family,
on the other.

Together, these became two books on the subject (“A Funny Thing
Happened… On the Way To My Life” and “It’s All In The Family”), and
they pretty much cover the nature of personality in the whole of humanity
through history and across cultures.

After all this, he went on to teach assessment to future clinical

psychologists at the University of Portland for some years. This led to his
supervising several master’s theses and Ph.D. dissertations involving in-
depth assessments in a wide variety of modes and fields. He shepherded a
number of Ph.D. psychologists to their licenses.

As all this was going on, he also ran a night club for teenagers during the
sixties, whereupon he discovered the huge cultural and psychological
evolutionary process we are undergoing. Simultaneously, he worked with
very large inter-generational and inter-cultural encounter groups that further
exposed him to this humanity wide consciousness-expansion process.

From this he went on to found and clinically direct a number of clinical

treatment programs for everything from adolescent delinquents to drug
abusers and alcoholics to dangerous and out of control children and
adolescents to adult criminals. He also became involved in forensic
psychology as a professional assessor and treatment intervention advisor.

Then the “Home Office” stepped in and told him that he had to become a
“Q-tip” (a turban-wearing American Sikh). This led to his developing a
profound understanding of the sacred and Cosmic realm. It also resulted in
his integrating everything into what he calls his “sacred teacher” destiny.

Having done all this, he found himself impelled to start writing books on
the psychological and sacred meanings of all manner of things. He
commenced with an exhaustive examination of the implications about
people arising from their preferences and rejections of over 90 common
colors. It took him four years of highly intensive work to pull all this
together.

59
This formed up his “Dictionary” approach to understanding things -- both in
“getting” who people are as assessed by their responses to colors, and in
writing about it so that others could understand what people’s color
reactions mean about the person (the book Hue are You?).

The next development involved his reviewing the face-reading literature in

order to write a “Dictionary” of the meanings of facial structure, based on
his massive amount of experience in that field and upon the literature
review (the book What’s in a Face?).

This in turn led to his drawing upon his 20 years of literature examination
in psychosomatics, along with incorporating with the work of others who
interpreted the emotional meanings of bodily malfunctions and breakdowns
(this book Messages from the Body). Then he turned to the psychological
and symbolic meanings of animals, based on his many years of examination
of the symbolic literature (the book Animals Their Psycho-Symbolic
Meanings).

Which in turn, led to his pulling together all his experience in the alcohol
and drug abuse fields to write a “Dictionary” of addictions and cravings of
all kinds (the book Addictions and Cravings). Then he summarized his 30
years in the mental health field to generate a “Dictionary” of Behavioral,
Psychological and Psychiatric Problems (the book Problematic Patterns). So
it went, expanding into 14 such “Dictionaries” in all.

The point of all this is to indicate that he was in effect forced out on a limb
to the cutting edge of things over and over again, with the outcome that he
rose to the challenges.

This in turn resulted in his developing a highly evolved skill and form of
channeling. It is not a “magical talent,” on the one hand, and it is not a
“fantasy creation,” on the other. It is a capability derived from a lifetime of
experience that became an integrated river arising from a dozen or so
streams of development.

The result is a process of understanding of the meanings of things derived

from systematically accumulating accomplishments of comprehension. It is

60
in effect a combination of functional analysis, anthropological observation
and interpretation, and sacred understanding.

And it is something that can be applied by others. It is to this end that we

now turn to the thinking, empathic resonation and significance
comprehension that hopefully will be utilized when working with the
“Dictionaries.”

UNDERSTANDING OTHERS

Essentially, the process of coming to comprehend who a person is from

information about them involves the utilization of the laws of the Cosmos
and of the resultants of our evolutionary history and our bio-psycho-social
nature in the process.

The laws of physics are just beginning to tap into the interdimensional
nature of the operation of everything, thereby validating the true reality of
humanity and of the Universe. The systematic application of this, too, is an
integral part of coming to compassionate comprehension.

So the “Dictionary” item construction and item interpretation process are an

integrational multidimensional holographic comprehension, with a resulting
organic and Cosmically correct intervention.

It involves a holistic pull-together of all the aspects of the situation, the

person and the context of what is happening for the person when a
phenomenon such as a bodily hassle, an equipment problem, or a functional
difficulty occurs.

This is the “streams into a river” process that led to Michael J. Lincoln’s
evolution into a “Dictionary-developer.” This very same process is what is
involved in understanding who someone is and what is happening with
them from the items in one or more of the “Dictionaries.”

One of the prime requirements in order to be able to do this effectively is

for the “Dictionary”-user to read the introduction to the “Dictionary.” Each
“Dictionary” introduction explains how the correspondences that lie at the

61
base of the items work, so that you can understand what things mean and
how they can mean that.

The ability to interpret and understand people is not the resultant of a

“talent” or a “gift.” A talent is the systematic application of a “narrow-
band” skill to a high degree of competence. However, in order to truly
understand the meaning of someone, you have to go “broad-band” and
holographic. Pulling things out of context or acting on a “narrow-band”
understanding of something brings great difficulties. Context is the crux of
comprehension and compassion.

So the effective way to work with the “Dictionaries” is to seek to know

what the various “streams” are that make up the “river” that is the person-
in-context that you are seeking to understand.

It takes a good deal of experience and practice to develop the ability to

“stream-to-river” comprehend who someone is and what is happening for
them. It is quite possible to have a “talent,” such as face structure
perceiving, without having the ability to read faces. It is also quite possible
to be soul and/or life experienced enough to work holistically with
information, without having much of a talent. Michael J. Lincoln is just
such a person.

You don’t have to have a “talent” of being able to understand people. It is

not a “God-given gift.” But you do need to be able to integrate things
holistically.

What has been done here is to seek to exemplify the kind of thinking and
understanding that underlie Michael J. Lincoln’s process of item-building
and people comprehending. First “the making of the man” was described,
and then the workings of “man that was made” were briefly characterized in
that context. Hopefully, this will give you a better idea of “how he does it.”

62
Section 6

How Does He DO It?

63
Introduction

How Does He DO It?

26

27

28

29

64
65
Messages From the Body

66
67
Messages From the Body

68
ABASIA (Inability to walk due to lack of coordination)

“Destabilized.” They are suffering from scattered thinking, distractible

trains of thought, and not being centered cognitively. They feel thrown off-
base, with no sense of safety in a kind of fearful drivenness. They are
“desperately seeking Susan” in an attempt to gain some sense of stability.

They are therefore always on the lookout for the “greener grass,” and they
are continuously in fear of missing out or of missing the “key element to
things.” As a result, they are often instantly pulled off balance by any
passing stimulus that “might be the critical factor.” It is the result of a
“magical mystery tour” unstable dysfunctional family in which things never
really worked, and in which there was no way to really tell what was
actually going on. (See MENIERE’S DISEASE; PARALYSIS)

ABDOMINAL CRAMPS

“Dodge ball.” They are having trouble with a fearful refusal to flow with
experiences, and as a result, they are in effect stopping the process of life in
its tracks. They have great fear of assimilating negativity, of having to “eat
shit.”

It is the result of an underlying distrust of the Universe generated by a

severely dysfunctional family. They have learned that nothing can be
counted on, and that all good things are in effect “poison apples.”

ABDOMINAL PAIN

“Up for grabs.” They are experiencing intense survival-anxiety and

concerns over whether they can really handle life. There is a strongly felt
powerlessness arising from “skid row” programming and learned
helplessness in the face of a severely dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Virgo-ism.” They are trying to cover all the details, to organize and
coordinate everything, to analyze the situation and meet all needs in the

69
“right” way. The result is nit-picking perfectionism, detail-domination, and
an inability to see the forest for the trees. It is a pattern that got started in a
severely patriarchal and perfectionistic family.

*************************************

“Meddling.” They are manifesting a certain over-criticality, along with a

compulsion to help others that is carried out unwisely. They have a strong
desire to be needed in order to inflate a damaged ego or to manipulate
someone.

They end up pushing ideas or things on people in an unwanted “rescue-

tripping” pattern that is the product of their feeling responsible for
“straightening things out” in their dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Slave feelings.” They feel used and abused, rushed and over-controlled,
and like they are in servitude. They feel that what they give is not used,
appreciated or utilized for its intended purposes. They become emotionally
possessive and unbalanced, with no sense of being loved, wanted or needed.
It is a “Cinderella” pattern, in which they were used and abused for self-
immersed purposes in a dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Intuition-avoidance.” They are avoiding their inner knowing, truth-

perceptions and reality-reading capacities. They are over-rational and/or
fearfully reality-avoidant. They grew up in a severely dysfunctional and
denial-dominated family in which accuracy of understanding lead to great
pain and potential disaster.

ABDOMINAL PREGNANCY

“What are YOU doing here?!” They are intensely ambivalent or rejecting of
being pregnant, of being pregnant in these circumstances and/or of being
pregnant with this child. The result is that the fertilization happened outside
of the womb.

70
This rare and dangerous occurrence reflects either the massive intent of the
soul of the child and/or of the Universe to have this pregnancy occur despite
or even because of the mother’s intense resistance (as a part of the
individual’s destiny design).

ABNORMALLY RAPID HEART-BEAT

“False alarms.” They are a “self-made person” who believes that they are
all they’ve got. They have felt cut off from the environment and the
Universe all their life, and that they therefore have to handle everything on
their own hook, unassisted.

All this activates moments where things get out of control and beyond their
coping capabilities. These bring on anxiety attacks that accelerate the heart-
beat. It is the result of never having received love and merging as a child.
(See “LONG QT” SYNDROME)

ABORTION

“Not NOW!” They have a profound sense of mis-timing, along the lines of
“Later -- Or maybe never.” The parents of the child are not at peace with
each other and/or the circumstances are not right for them to be parents.
There is a strong fear of the future and a deep apprehension of the
upcoming responsibilities in the mother generated by a severely
dysfunctional family in which they had to carry a lot of the load.

In most cases, the “visiting soul” only wanted this early period experience.
In some cases, the soul decides that the circumstances aren’t right, and they
opt to come back later. In a few cases, they decide that the circumstances
aren’t ever going to be appropriate for them, and they move on to some
other plan. (See INFERTILITY; STERILITY)

ABSCESSES (A large collection of pus that needs opening)

“Seething volcano.” They are struggling with a smoldering resentment and

anger that has been fermenting to a point where the situation is one where
they have become irritated and inflamed to the point of an upheaval of late.

71
There is a feeling of restriction and over-work, of over-responsibility and
deprivation. They are experiencing conflict and irritability, frustration, and
rejection of their situation. They have a fulminating fury and fermenting
thoughts over past hurts and slights, along with intentions for revenge.
When the resulting eruption finally occurs, it leaves them empty and
exhausted, having finally blown itself out, thereby clearing the way for
constructive alternatives to be formed to meet the needs of the situation.

It is a pattern that is all too familiar to them, due to the dysfunctionality of

their family, where they could do nothing until things reached crisis
proportions. They were also often attacked for their needs, wants and
desires. (See affected body part(s) for more information)

ACCIDENT

“Hold it right there!” There is a need for immediate and direct action
regarding their highly stressful situation. Their unconscious mind and the
Universe have precipitated an event that stops the direction they were
going, in order to bring to the surface issues that must be seen and dealt
with.

The parts of the body affected are indicating in more detail what the issues
are. There is a need for complete re-assessment and a change so great that
dramatic intervention was necessary.

**************************************

“Up against the wall.” They are feeling unable to defend themselves, and
that they are caught in an inescapable disastrous situation. They are
intensely tense and worried, and it is affecting their ability to function and
to cope. They grew up in a crisis-generating dysfunctional family in which
they were powerless to do anything about it.

**************************************

“Mortar mouth.” They are manifesting an inability to speak up for

themselves, and they are displaying a real fear of attack. They feel unable to

72
take a position on anything, for fear of devastation. It is the result of an
assaultive family environment.

**************************************

“Rebellious child.” They are prone to knee-jerk control-avoidance,

obstinacy, and refusal to cooperate with the program. They are the product
of an authoritarian home in which there was a colluding parent who
encouraged the individual to be resistive and disruptive -- particularly in
reaction to authority figures and systems.

**************************************

“Self-flagellation.” They are engaged in systematic self-rejection or even

self-hatred induced by a severely rejecting family. They are in effect
punishing themselves all the time. The present incident is often set off by
either too much success (that they feel they “don’t deserve”) or by
seemingly demoralizing demonstrations of “worthlessness” or “evilness” on
their part, which trigger a frenzy of self-hatred and the accident.

**************************************

“Destructive implants.” They are going off in reaction to “crossing the

forbidden line” towards manifesting their destiny. The implant was built in
as a part of an intense “keep them around the old homestead” programming
designed to maintain them as the parent(s) “private preserve.”

**************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

ACCIDENTAL DEATH

73
“Outta here!” The soul’s decision is to leave body now. This can either
represent the completion of its intentions for this life or a re-assessment of
the situation and a utilization of this “rapid exit” method to conclude this re-
appraisal of what to do next.

************************************

“Shit happens.” In this situation, the “random generator component of the

Universe has operated. A small percentage of events are indeed accidental -
- for purposes of constantly creating new situations for us to handle that are
the results of neither our will nor the Divine design. Incidentally, “shinola
happens” too.

************************************

“Self-destruct.” Here, the individual was in effect “an accident waiting to

happen.” The underlying motivation is massive self-rejection, combined
with insufficient impetus to “take the bull by the horns.” There are many
situations in which this can happen.

Some Examples:

“I don’t belong here!” They have a feeling of not deserving to exist, along
with a constant courting of death as an expression of that. It arises from a
rather intensely neglectful or non-involved parenting pattern.

*************************************

“Delusions of invincibility.” In a compulsive risk-aholic dare-devil lifestyle

arising from an underlying conviction that no one (including them) is any
damned good, due to their having been treated as the “intimate enemy” by a
catastrophe-courting family.

*************************************

“I deserve the very worst.” They were told that they could do no right and
that they were “bad, wrong and evil.”

*************************************

74
“Quasimodo.” They have become a professional rejection-courter who
believes their own “bad press.” It comes from being “fail-safe” trained to be
“unfit for human consumption” so they could be counted on to end up
staying around the old homestead.

*************************************

“See how I’m hurting myself!” They are living a slow self-destruct lifestyle
generated by being ignored until they did something to harm themselves.

*************************************

“Assassination-seeking.” They were told that they were the cause of all
evils by an out-classed and overwhelmed family -- and they believed it.

*************************************

“Playing on the freeway.” They in effect were told that they were in the way
and that the world would be much better off without them.

ACCIDENTAL POISONING

“Floating flotsam feelings.” They are feeling defenseless and like they have
to allow others to take control and to run the situation. They are operating
from learned helplessness and the feeling that they don’t have the right to
protection, support or nurturance. They simply expect to “eat shit” as a part
of living.

They are now being subjected to external domination to which they are
either surrendering in fear or violently resisting. They are suffering from
suggestibility to negative programming from others. It is a pattern that arose
in a family where they had few, if any rights, and in which much anger and
negativity took place over which no one seemed to have any control. It was
an oppressive and invasive family.

There is a need for immediate and direct action regarding their situation.
Their unconscious mind and the Universe have precipitated an event that
stops the direction they were going in order to bring to the surface issues

75
that must be seen and worked on. A complete re-assessment and change is
required, and so a dramatic intervention was necessary.

POISONED TO DEATH

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

***********************************

“Snuffed out.” They were so crushed by their environment that they were
driven over the edge by it. This was a destiny design intended to handle
cosmic issues in this lifetime.

ACHES

“Heart-smarts.” They are experiencing an intense sense of sadness and

deprivation -- a deep need or desire for something that is not being fulfilled.
They have an intense longing for love, a pronounced sense of being alone
on their own forever, and a desperate need for being held arising from a
feeling of undeservingness.

They feel utterly separated from and unable to connect with any source of
love, and they feel that nobody cares about them. They are aching to be
held and loved, and they feel that all their attempts to do anything about it
are derailed or futile. It was created by a severely rejecting family. (See
affected body parts for more information)

ACHILLES’ TENDON PROBLEMS

“Purposefully ungrounded.” They have an unwillingness to put their plans

into action or to make their intentions do-able. It arises out of their “run
amok-anxiety” and their fear of letting themselves go -- arising out of
severe self-distrust. They are afraid they will “set off World War III” if they

76
connect to their intentions and allow them to follow through. It comes from
an intensely wrong-making and accusatory family.

RIGHT ACHILLES’ TENDON

“My way may not be the right way.” There is resistance around the manner
in which they are going to utilize in manifesting their intentions. It comes
from being made wrong for the way in which they did things.

LEFT ACHILLES’ TENDON

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have conflicts around the nature of their

intentions arising from fears of what they might wreak if they were to put
their intentions into action. It comes from “NOW look what you’ve done!”
messaging by their family.

“ACID CONDITIONS”

“What goes around comes around.” They are suffering from the results of
their rather severe judgmentalness, which is based on subconscious fearful
hatred of all kinds. It reflects the “intimate enemy” treatment they received
from their family.

ACID REFLUX (Heartburn -- Burning distress behind the sternum, due to

spasms of the esophagus or of the upper stomach, resulting in acid coming
up)

“Happiness-horror.” They have an intense, pervasive and clutching fear that

is tripped off by their experiencing some joy or happiness. They have a
horrifying sense of impending attack for “undeserved” joy.

They are getting what they want for once, and they feel that somehow they
should not -- that it violates the Cosmic or the moral order somehow. They
are anticipating retribution for the just rewards of their efforts and essence.

There is an intense abandonment-and betrayal-paranoia, based in part on

past lives. It was generated in a severely restrictive, disapproving,

77
moralistic and fear-inducing childhood. They came out of it with an intense
fear of the Universe as a harshly judgmental and punitive place.

***********************************

“Purple passion.” They are intensely involved and activated over something
-- love or anger that is very pronounced -- and it is scaring the hell out of
them. They are operating with pronounced injunction not to feel, and
especially not to feel strongly. It is a pattern that got started in their highly
feeling-suppressing and/or denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“Burning to be free.” They are stuffing themselves and their feelings, out of
a fear of catastrophic consequences if they let go and “let fly with
themselves.” They are now reaching the point where “This is an up with
which I can no longer put!” It comes from growing up in a family in which
it was not acceptable for them to be themselves or to threaten to grow away
by becoming themselves in a destiny-manifesting manner.

ACNE

“Go ahead -- everybody else does.” It is an expression of their self-dislike

and non-self-acceptance that leads to rejection-expectations and rejection-
elicitations. They are at odds with themselves about who they are, with
expressing their inner nature, and with discovering themselves. They have a
lot of guilt and shame, and they are highly prone to self-blame.

The acne is an expression of their anger, resentment and fear around their
needing unconditional acceptance and love for who they are. It can also be
a means of preventing contact with others, which they both desire and
dread. It is due to a rather severely accusatory and rejecting family.

***********************************

“Shitty end of the stick.” They are feeling picked on and nagged at, and
there is a resounding resentment of authority, along with a lot of rebellious
blame-throwing. They are prone to small outbursts of anger, and they are in

78
emotional conflict that is erupting. They are manifesting the effects of an
engulfing mother who pushed for maturity and responsibility, but who
subtly undermined exactly those qualities.

***********************************

“Ostrich trip.” They are refusing to see what is happening in their life, and
they are unwilling to acknowledge their role in things. They are the product
of a denial-dominated dysfunctional family, and they are themselves
heavily into denial. (See BLACKHEADS; PIMPLES; WHITEHEADS)

ACQUIRED IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME (A.I.D.S)

“I don’t deserve to exist!” They have a strong belief in their not being good
enough, in their not deserving to manifest their selfhood. The result is auto-
allergy, self-intolerance, self-hatred and the operation of self-destructive
programs.

There is an inability to assimilate self-characteristics, with a resulting self-

disgust and self-attack. They simply cannot love and accept themselves
fully as who they are, and they are systematically denying of their own
needs.

They are self-suppressing around negative feelings such as anger and fear.
They use a lot of denial of their situation, with a resulting tremendous
emotional pain and blockage. There is no felt right to exist, and they are
massively self-rejecting.

They are convinced that nobody gives a damn, and they therefore feel
ultimately hopeless, vulnerable, defenseless and despairing. They also
suffer from sexual guilt arising from self-sustaining self-gratification and
indulgence. Underneath it all is an extreme deep-seated rage at themselves,
the world and the Cosmos.

The whole pattern was induced by an over-possessive and rejecting mother.

It is in effect a severe maternal deprivation and rejection reaction. They
have a real need to become real, and to pay attention to how they live their
life and who they in fact are.

79
ACRONYX (See TOE NAIL PROBLEMS)

ACTION DYSTONIA (See DISRUPTION OF MOTION)

ADDICTIONS

“Desperately seeking Susan.” They are feeling terribly separated from the
“Source,” their Higher Self, other people and the world. They are therefore
“looking for God in all the wrong places.” They are starved for union and
merging experiences, with a “magnificent obsession” for getting “high”
(closer to God). They are willing to “sell their all” to get it.

They have no ability to fill their need from within themselves. There is a
deep feeling of emptiness, hopelessness and meaninglessness of life, like a
profound black hole inside.

It is an issue of their relationship to themselves, along with resentment and

anger at the world for not fulfilling their desires. It comes from having had a
severe maternal deprivation and/or rejection experience, resulting in an
intense sense of isolation and alienation, along with profound questions
about their acceptability to God.

***************************************

“Self-reassurance.” They feel out-classed and overwhelmed by the world in

a powerless sort of way, and they are seeking experiences that give them
some sense of power over their life. It got started in their dominating and
competence-undermining family.

***************************************

“Love-substitute.” They are looking for love in all the wrong places as a
function of feeling undeserving of love, with the resulting abandonment-
anxiety. It arises from early emotional ambivalence, neglect and/or rejection
from their mother.

***************************************

80
“My lifeline.” They feel rather intensely at risk and threatened by all that is
happening within, to, and around them, and they need a “reassuring
presence” and “self-stroking device” at all times. It is the result of having
been left more or less to their own devices a lot in their severely
dysfunctional/addictive family.

***************************************

“Cosmic abandonment.” They are feeling like they have been expelled from
the Garden of Eden for being what/who they are. It has even resulted in
their losing or having damaged their connection to their “ultimate back-up
resource.” They are experiencing deep self-rejection depression, and it
needs corrective work right away. It comes from very early emotional
rejection by their mother (commencing intrauterine and post-partum).

***************************************

“Self-avoidance.” They are desperately avoiding contact with their inner

self, due to a fear of what might be inside. They have a real inability to cope
with life situations and a firm belief that they are being dominated and
exploited. There is a deep-seated feeling of failure in some specific life
areas, and they are full of fear-based weakness effects. They do not know
how to handle life or how to love themselves. They were largely ignored
until they joined their dysfunctional family’s demoralizing and debilitating
lifestyle.

***************************************

“Self-medication.” They are seeking to dull the pain of how life is for them
and/or to “get through the night” somehow. They have been exposed to a
continuous barrage of “relief-seeking” activities by their family and in the
culture, and they are now a vigorous participant in the process.

It is a systematic avoidance of facing and healing the underlying destructive

dysfunctionality that runs their life. It got started in an equally
dysfunctional family, and they are just the next generation.

***************************************

81
“Survival strategy.” They found early on that in order to fit in and/or to
protect themselves on the survival level in a household that would turn
highly hostile or catastrophically abandoning if they didn’t, they had to join
the system or the system would lick them.

***************************************

“Self-numbing.” They systematically seek to shut out the world around

them because it was so invasive, aversive and abhorrent. They also want to
avoid all feelings, as they bring up such pain and threatening fear. They
turned to the addictive activity because there was simply no way to correct
the situation upon which they were totally dependent, and which they felt
they couldn’t escape.

*************************************

“Time-structuring.” They systematically suppress significance of

experience and manifestation in a ferocious manner. They have a desperate
need not to respond to many aspects of reality, and they had to find some
way to structure their time, with the result that they became immersed in the
addictive process. They were forced by their denial-dominated severely
dysfunctional family to frantically avoid reality at all costs.

*************************************

“Despair freak-out.” They are profoundly depressed and demoralized, and

they see no real sense of significance or even no reason for living. They
grew up in a totally devastatingly dysfunctional family who undermined
any sense of workability in life.

*************************************

“Rebellious child.” They became involved in the addictive process as their

way of expressing their rebellion against the whole family system. To
escape what they felt was an overwhelmingly controlling and/or
authoritarian system, they defiantly got involved in the addictive process.
This then resulted in its taking on a life of its own, and in its becoming
totally intertwined with the rebellion process.

82
 *************************************

“Care-coercing.” They have tied the addictive processes into a

responsibility-avoidant and environment-milking lifestyle. It is the result of
a family in which there was a great deal of competence-and confidence-
undermining in an unconscious attempt to “keep them around the old
homestead” via preventing them from developing their coping capabilities.

*************************************

“Slow self-destruct.” They were so thoroughly ignored and devalued that

they got the message loud and clear, “Why don’t you just do the world a
favor and go play on the freeway?” So they found the perfect way to carry
out that “Divine imperative,” and they are totally devoted to carrying it out
to its bitter ending.

*************************************

“Blown out.” They are in effect damaged in their central nervous system in
a manner that prevents their developing a functional lifestyle. They are
unable to think effectively or to perceive realistically. It is the result of such
severe abuse and self-abuse that it created organic brain damage. It came
about from a massively addictive and self-destructive family system. (See
the book Addictions & Cravings by the author)

ADDISON’S DISEASE (Under-active adrenals)

“What’s the use?” There is an underlying rage at themselves that is

resulting in and from severe emotional malnutrition. They don’t understand
themselves, they have little sense of selfhood, and they are unable to
comprehend their feelings and reactions to things. They feel “alone on a
desert island” with no support or sustenance from anyone. It has the effect
of “pulling the plug” on their motivational system, and they end up
effectively a “couch potato.” Their family was intensely accusatory and
depriving.

ADENOID PROBLEMS (Lymph nodes in the back of the nasal passages)

83
“There I go again!” They see everything, even arguments, as being their
fault. They feel that everything that happens is somehow their doing, and
they have the experience that it is as though “they caused World War II.”
They feel like they have no right to be here taking up resources and that
they are unwelcome, in the way, and a bother, and an evil influence. It is an
old, familiar feeling, as they always felt this way as a child, as a result of
lack of acceptance and from subconsciously hateful and accusatory
parenting.

ADHESIVE CAPSULITIS (Joint interfaces become sticky)

“Oh no you don’t!” They have a rather pronounced propensity to “hold

themselves up” in their pursuit of objectives in life. It arises from a guilt-
inducing childhood.

ADRENAL DEPLETION

“Emotional exhaustion.” They are “running on empty,” and they are in

effect drained of their “life force.” They have been undergoing a great deal
of stress and/or over-responsibility, and they can no longer “carry that
load.” They are the product of a draining, dysfunctional family in which
they effectively played the role of the “family linchpin” and disaster-
deflector.

CUSHING’S DISEASE (Overactive adrenals)

“Way out there.” They are reacting to the over-production of crushing ideas
that result in mental imbalance and a feeling of being over-powered. They
have the experience of not being able to select or control the contents of
their mind.

It comes from having had to remain continuously open to all inputs as a

function of faulty cognitive structure development arising from a confusion-
inducing and intrusive family. (See GRAVE’S DISEASE)

ADRENAL PROBLEMS

84
“Resentment-rage.” They are manifesting considerable anger and
irritation/frustration with their life. They feel that they must constantly work
at generating any form of success, recognition, influence or station in life.
They were systematically prevented from having these experiences as a
child, and they were programmed to be self-defeating.

*************************************

“Blown out.” They are suffering from overload, threats to their well being,
fear, anxiety, and stress to the point where they no longer care for
themselves. They feel like a defeated victim, and they have developed a
giving up and emotionally indifferent attitude, along with a certain lack of
courage and a nihilistic defeatism. Their experience is that everything is too
much work, responsibility and devastation. They come from a highly
dysfunctional and demoralizing family.

*************************************

“Furiously dominating.” They are manifesting pronounced “authority

freak” control issues. They are experiencing intense impatience, and they
are engaging in hyper-irritability and demandingness. They are also
manifesting unresolved enviousness and loss-paranoia. They are essentially
being abusively willful in an ecologically insensitive or even in an
ecologically damaging manner. They are the product of an authoritarian
patriarchal household where they had to “join the enemy.”

RIGHT ADRENAL PROBLEM

“At a loss.” They are intensely agitated about their relations with the world
around them, including their intimate environment.

LEFT ADRENAL PROBLEM

“I can’t trust me!” They are intensely agitated about their personal and inner
life, including self-disgust, self-distrust and self-defeating patterns.

ADRENO-LEUKO DYSTROPHY (See A.L.D.)

85
AEROPHAGY (See “GULPING AIR”)

“AGENT ORANGE” POISONING (Dioxin)

“I caused World War II!” They are suffering the effects of a profound
underlying guilt/shame complex induced by either overt and assaultive or
subtle, subconscious or subterranean accusations to the effect of their
having been the source of all their family’s problems, especially the
mother’s difficulties and disappointments in life.

It arises from exploitative or unconsciously desperately needy parent(s)

who reacted to their inherent qualities as the utterly fundamental resource
for the parent(s) survival and/or quality of life. When they were unable to
“deliver the goods” because they were only a child, the family responded
with intense blame-throwing and shame-induction.

AGING PROBLEMS

“Bring back the good old days!” They are engaging in a rejection of reality
and the present, and they have much belief in outmoded social stereotypes
and old conceptions. There is a profound fear of being who they are, along
with a great rejection-paranoia. They are also plagued by lifelong
resentment, disgust and despair, and they hate their life. They are the
product of a rigidly stratified social structure, and of a very narrow
viewpoint. They need to commit to enjoying life and who they are.

AGRANULOCYTOSIS (Loss of white blood cells resulting in no defense

against infection)

“Defenseless.” They feel very much “at effect” rather than “at cause.” To
them, it is their “just desserts” because they “don’t deserve any better.”
They are the product of a severely accusative and exploitative family who
systematically eroded their sense of worth, and who induced deep self-
rejection and self-distrust.

AGUE (Fever)

86
“On fire.” They are “burning up” with intense anger and stored resentments.
They also have a lot of agitated worry and hurry, in fear of anticipated
outcomes. There is a severe lack of harmony and a great deal of internal
conflict. They are prone to be fearful of loss of friendships, and they have
strong abandonment feelings. It represents an experienced return to the
uncertainties and frustrations of their severely dysfunctional family.

A.I.D.S. (See ACQUIRED IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME)

AIR SICKNESS

“Lost in the clouds.” They have a severe sense of lack of groundedness that
is arising from being either allowed or required to remain a “perennial
child,” as a function of the parent(s) wanting to “keep them around the old
homestead.”

Whether or not they have mastered the pattern by now, it is a constant threat
to them, and this situation of not being grounded on terra firma, either
figuratively or actually, tends to elicit a fear and disgust reaction that is set
off by altitude and/or flying as a result.

ALCOHOLISM

“Fearful involvement-avoidance.” They have a bad case of overwhelmed

sensibilities and hyper-sensitivity. They are in effect a frustrated mystic
trying to connect with the “Source.” It arises in a super-sensitive who then
has to “numb out,” due to growing up in an invasive and abrasive
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Eeyore trip.” They have strong feelings of futility, guilt and inadequacy, in
a “What’s the point?” giving up. They have strong feelings of having been
living a lie. They have a deep self-rejection and a feeling of worthlessness,
along with an intense sense of defeat and inner hostility arising from a very
dysfunctional family. They are in effect immobilized by their unresolved
self-undermining attitudes.

87
They are highly vulnerable to believing in the denigrating evaluations and
characterizations of others. There are many traumatic memories of
childhood, with an accompanying sense of failure. They manifest emotional
weakness and inability to cope with life situations. They were subjected to
“You can do no right!” and “NOW look what you’ve caused!” parenting.

*************************************

“Head in the sand.” They are engaged in systematic self-suppressing

reality-avoidance. They are heavily into defensive accountability-
avoidance, denial-domination, analysis-avoidance, perceptual emphasis,
and compulsive concreteness. They are systematically feeling-avoidant,
experience-dampening, and looking the other way, as they desperately fear
feeling. They are the product of a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional
family.

*************************************

“Goodie-getting.” They have a strong relief in a false God of “relief” in the

form of artificially false pleasure-seeking. They manifest a lot of defensive
dependency, and they are intensely prone to “never enough”
demandingness. They also have the belief that habits can take possession of
them, so that they are in effect “above accountability.”

They have a profound fear of “adult responsibility” and they are

continuously involved in “maturity”-avoidance because what they
witnessed in their home strongly indicated that being a grown-up was a
horror.

A.L.D. (Adreno-Leuko Dystrophy) [Loss of myelin sheaths in the brain in

male children]

“Thinking of leaving.” They have found that their needs seem to come last
in the priorities of the Universe. They are feeling like they have been
abandoned by the “Home Office.” They feel that there are serious conflicts
between their personal goals and the Divine intent, and they are very
worried and anxious as a result. It is a “God is Al Capone” relational issue
with the Source.

88
There is a profound inner conflict between the desires and intentions of
their personality and their perception of their unfolding destiny. They have
the feeling that the “Home Office” has taken the helm of their life against
their will and desires. As a result, there is now a major difficulty with their
“bio-computer” and communication center.

They are the product of a family who did not respond to their needs, or in
which they were forced to take over the meeting of their own needs because
no one else could or would. Yet there doesn’t seem to be a comprehensible
reason for it, and they have developed an abiding distrust of the Universe.
Paradoxically enough, it is an experience their soul chose to have for the
purpose of developing their soul, for Cosmic contribution, and/or for
karmic compensation.

ALGESIA (See HYPERSENSITIVITY TO PAIN)

ALLERGIC SHOCK (Obstructed breathing, hives, plunging blood pressure

-- it is life threatening)

“There must be some way outta here!” They are having a severe attack of
self-rejection simultaneous with an intense sense of being attacked and
accused by their environment. They have a great deal of guilt and shame,
along with a feeling that they should be “punished for their sins.”

They are functioning on the edge, due to intense emotional difficulties and
to denying of their own power and self-worth. They feel threatened and
they fear loss, with the result that they are dominated by anxiety, suppressed
emotions and unresolved aggravations and irritations. The current
circumstances are generating a “What’s the use? It won’t work anyway”
demoralized desire to give up the ship, reflecting a subconscious death
wish.

It all reflects unexpressed severe grief over felt rejection by an extremely

“smother-loving” but cold mother. They are longing for mother’s love or
that of a mother standin. But they have suddenly arrived at the conclusion
that it is useless to try any more. They are feeling that there’s really no point
and no winning in this business of life, so they are looking for a way out.

89
ALLERGIES

“Inner crying.” They are experiencing the effects of suppressed grief, and
they are in effect operating under the domination of a severe chronic cold.
They are seeking to elicit love in an indirect manner, since they found that
they did not get the love they needed as a child. They are longing for
mother’s love or that of a mother standin.

They are experiencing the effects of unexpressed grief over felt rejection by
an extremely “smother-loving” but cold mother.

*************************************

“Crushed Coke can.” They feel stifled and manifestation-prevented by the

world around them. They have the experience of being over-run with
feelings that don’t seem to have any solution or any possibility of things
changing. They are in effect denying of their own power and self-worth. It
came from being systematically undermined and denigrated as a child.

*************************************

“Up against the wall.” They are having an over-reaction to felt threats to
their well-being, to something hostile to their welfare. They are engaged in
on-the-edge functioning, due to severe emotional difficulties. They are
dominated by anxiety, suppressed emotions and/or generalized dread.

They have a deep-seated fear of letting other people know what they are
experiencing or who they are. They feel threatened and they fear loss, so
they take a “rejecting first” approach. They are dominated by anxiety,
suppressed emotions and generalized dread. There is a profound level of
fear about having to participate fully in life, or about potential annihilation.
They have an intense distrust of letting something or someone inside their
boundaries.

They are the product of a frighteningly dysfunctional and invasive family

which you could never tell when the next piece of shit was coming off the
wall. You just knew it would.

90
 *************************************

“Suppressed rage.” They are repressing rather strong anger and aggression
reactions. There is an irritation reaction to life, and they are reacting to
people instead of interacting with them. Who are they really allergic to?

They are laboring under the effects of an unresolved aggravation or irritant

from childhood. They are the product of an intensely enraging
dysfunctional family, which constantly subjected them to intolerable and
insoluble situations. (See the book Allergies & Aversions by the author)

ALOPECIA (See LOSS OF BODY AND HEAD HAIR)

ALTITUDE SICKNESS (Headache, upset stomach, vomiting, cramps)

“Hey, just a minute! Does not compute! TILT!” They are trying to integrate
incompatible-seeming ideas and information. They are full of implication-
anxiety about what would happen if they don’t succeed in coming up with a
meta-interpretation that pulls it all together in a cohesive context. They are
quite alarmed and possibly revolted by what is happening to them.

They are rising to new heights or they are getting down and getting
grounded and it is very upsetting to them. The whole idea of the thing is
thoroughly unpleasant to them, and they can’t stomach it. They are having
big implication reactions about what might happen as a result of what is
going down. They feel it could all lead to a most unpleasant ending.

They have a way of feeling responsible and personally accountable for

everything that happens, particularly the negative outcomes. To them,
something new is something dreadful about to happen. It just means more
accountability and responsibility, along with more trauma and pain.

It is the result of having been the only “sane one” in a dysfunctional family.
They were forced into the “family hoist” position (holding it up like the
silver thing in a car repair shop), and they constantly had to deal with
everyone’s eyes being psychologically focused on them in bitter accusation
and vilification whenever anything went wrong.

91
The family relied heavily on them, and they gave them the message loud
and clear that they have no right to commit elsewhere. As a result, they
have great guilt about sexuality, success, personal power, identity-
development and manifestation, destiny-furthering, intimacy, and all
manner of other family-“betrayals.”

Their current situation is tapping into these fears and feelings. In effect, a
big impediment to the flow of their life has to be changed. A very broad
decision about themselves that limits them severely has to be redecided
now, in no uncertain terms.

It is an impediment that is a childhood-acquired pattern that was an

adaptation to their dysfunctional family, like getting sick, success-
deflecting, self-invalidating, intimacy-incompetence feelings and the like.

ALVEOLI PROBLEMS (The air sacs in the lungs)

“I don’t deserve to exist.” They feel unworthy of taking up space and about
having requirements and resources, and they are seriously considering
“checking out” as a result. When they are vulnerable, or when they are
under stress, the world is decidedly not a safe place, in their experience.
They fear taking in life for fear that God will strike them dead.

It is the result of intense intrauterine and subsequent rejection and trauma.

Their mother did not want them, and they got that message loud and clear
from what they thought was the “Home Office” (All That Is). The outcome
is existential guilt resulting in self-deprivation based on severe self-
rejection.

RIGHT LUNG ALVEOLI PROBLEMS

“Guilt-grabbing.” They are struggling with guilt about their actions and
their environmental impacts.

LEFT LUNG ALVEOLI PROBLEMS

“Shame-frame.” They have intense shame about who they are -- about their
inner values, motivations and intentions.

92
ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE (Loss of memory and mental functioning
capacity)

“Can’t go on.” They have a desire to leave the planet, due to an inability to
face life as it is -- they are just plain exhausted from having to deal with
life. They feel that they just can’t face it all any more, and that they are
unable to be in control in their own life.

They have intense feelings of insufficiency, inferiority, inadequacy and

insecurity. They have come to a hapless, helpless, hopeless position, and
they are refusing to work with the world any more. So they are now
engaged in a “taking their marbles and going home” reaction. It represents a
continuation of a demoralized stance they have had since their competence-
and confidence-undermining childhood.

*************************************

“Leave me alone!” They want to live in their own little world, where none
of the SOB’s and nincompoops can bug them. They have a lot of
suppressed rage, and it comes out in continuous passive-aggressiveness and
ecology-“sliming.”

They are on a never-ending vengeance-vendetta, and they are indiscriminate

in their victimizations. They are the product of an infuriating but
implacably dysfunctional, passive-aggressive and subtly sadistic household.
(See DEMENTIA; SENILITY)

AMBLYOPIA (Poor refraction, leading to dullness of visual acuity)

“Awareness-avoidance.” They are operating with a “Don’t see!” injunction

arising from a “dynamite shed” dynamic in their severely denial-dominated
and dysfunctional family (they find themselves in a pitch black small space
with rough-hewn square boxes, a funny smell, and skinny little ropes, and
they light a match to see what it is).

When they did the “Emperor’s new clothes” thing, the family about fell
apart, they blew up, and/or they felt like the individual had destroyed the
world. Or at least the threat that this would happen was ever-present.

93
Furthermore, what they saw was never what they got. So they learned not to
see clearly.

AMEBIASIS (Parasitic stomach disease)

“I can’t take on any more!” They are intensely fearful and rageful over the
experience that the world is out to get them. They feel attacked, endangered
and powerless to do anything about it.

It comes from the experience that they have been “up to their eyebrows in
alligators” all their life, and they just can’t take any more challenges or
requirements or responsibilities. They can’t assimilate what is being
experienced and imposed on their experience, and they are rebelling blindly
in an adamant refusal to take on any more inputs and responsibilities. They
are the product of a severely self-immersed and possessive family who
overloaded them with demands, and who gave them little in the way of
coping capabilities.

AMENORRHEA (See LACK OF MENSTRUATION)

AMNESIA; AMNESIC SYNDROME (Loss of memory)

“Disappearing act.” They are burdened with a severe fear of life and an
inability to defend themselves, which leads to a running away from life
reaction. They are full of feelings of “I’m not enough,” and they want to get
out from under life’s requirements. Their experience is that “There is no joy
in Bloodville,” and they are deeply worried about how things are going to
go for them.

They have tremendous guilt and shame from the past. They function in a
weak, unintelligent and profoundly unsafe and unequipped for survival
manner, due to severely diminished self-worth and self-confidence.

It results from a severely critical and wrong-making family. There was

much trauma that was overwhelming in its implications and ramifications in
their formative process. As a result, they feel they have no personal potency
or ability to take a stand on anything.

94
 ***************************************

“Damn me!” They are angry at themselves for not being able to manage and
determine the outcomes of life’s processes or to bring sense to their life.
They feel that life is definitely not working the way they want, and they are
deeply resentful at what feels like being manipulated. At the same time,
they themselves are manipulative, and yet they are constantly frustrated at
the way thing turn out for them all the time. They are the product of a
selfish and mutually manipulative dysfunctional family.

AMYOTROPIC LATERAL SCLEROSIS (See “LOU GHERIG’S

DISEASE”)

AMYGOALA PROBLEMS (See BRAIN PROBLEMS)

ANALGESIA (See LACK OF THE SENSE OF PAIN)

ANAL PROBLEMS

“Rammed up my ass.” They have deep feelings of vulnerability to

overwhelm, engulfment, intrusion, assault, penetration and humiliation, and
they are very fearful of sexuality. They are severely self-suppressing and
feeling-avoidant.

They are also highly resistive to eliminating negativity, toxins and traumas,
out of a fear of what would happen if they “dumped their stuff.” They have
an intensely control-oriented and controlling approach, and they have a lot
of contained rage over perceived survival-threats. Theirs was a severely
restrictive and boundary-violating family, in a “butt-fucking” manner.

ANAL ABSCESSES

“Don’t open that box!” They have a lot of anger in relation to what they
don’t want to release. They are greatly handicapped by fear of letting go,
due to anticipated loss of vital life supports. It was learned in a highly
oppressive and repressive household.

ANAL BLEEDING

95
“God damn God!” There is much anger and frustration about life. They are
deeply distrusting of the Universe, due to a painfully paranoid household
formative experience.

ANAL “BURNING”

“Fucked in the butt.” They feel “royally screwed” by an authority, system

or other negative father figure. It reflects a deep distrust of the Universe that
was generated by highly untrustworthy parenting.

ANAL FISSURE; ANAL FISTULA (Hole in the anus)

“Won’t let go.” They are manifesting the effects of incomplete releasing of
life’s trash, and of their holding on to the garbage of the past. It is the result
of a grudge-carrying, injustice-nurturing family.

ANAL ITCHING

“I’m awful!” They are suffering from guilt and remorse over the past, and
from a refusal to forgive themselves. They came up in a highly
uncompromising and accusative household.

ANAL PAIN

“Beat me!” They have a lot of guilt and felt need for punishment. They feel
they are “bad” and “not good enough,” probably arising from severely
harsh toilet training that reflected a heavy-handed Calvinistic childhood.

ANORECTAL BLEEDING

“God is Al Capone!” They have a great deal of anger and frustration about
life. They are deeply distrusting of the Universe, due to a painfully paranoid
childhood household.

ANAPHRODISIA (See LACK OF SEXUAL DESIRE)

ANAPHYLACTIC ALLERGIC SHOCK (See ALLERGIC SHOCK)

ANDROGEN PROBLEMS (Male hormone)

96
“Initiative issues.” They are being disrupted in their ability to be effectively
assertive, creatively instigating, confronting, aggressive, enduring, strong,
etc. They are undergoing difficulties with these impact-making and
difference-making motivations and resources. It arises from distorted and
dysfunctional parenting patterns with regard to the manifestation of the
creative initiative process.

LOW ANDROGEN

They are having problems with male shame, amotivational syndrome,

effective castration, or other confidence-, competence-and/or one-
pointedness-undermining feelings and manifestations. They were subjected
to initiative-negating and wrong-making parenting.

HIGH ANDROGEN

They are being prone to be aggressive, over-bearing, excessively willful

and/or insensitive in their functioning. They were in effect overly conceded
to and “privileged position” parented. (See HORMONAL PROBLEMS)

ANEMIA (Shortage of red blood cells)

“There is no joy in Bloodville.” There is insufficient sustaining input in

their life, and they are overloaded and drained out, due to their excessive
sense of responsibility. They are suffering from intense and unresolved
deprivation-grief, and they are very weak in the sense of the Spirit and in
trust of the Universe. They have no joy in life, and they stay tensed for bad
news or disaster in a “catastrophic expectations” orientation. They have a
super-serious and “but not for me” attitude, with an “Eeyore”-type nihilism
and “yes but” approach. They are afraid of life, and they can’t enjoy
themselves. They feel undeserving of joy and love, and that God will
destroy them if they have any.

They are therefore systematically life-negating and love-refusing. They

can’t love themselves, let alone anyone else. They have in effect given up
on life, and they suffer from feelings of total helplessness. It is the result of
a severely harsh and over-responsible childhood with an unloving and
aggressively attacking mother.

97
 ***********************************

“I let them do it again!” They are angry at themselves for not being able to
manage and determine the outcomes of life’s processes or to bring sense to
their life. They feel that life is definitely not working the way they want,
and they are angry at what feels like being manipulated. At the same time,
they themselves are manipulative, and yet they are constantly frustrated at
the way things turn out for them all the time. They are the product of a
selfish and mutually manipulative dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“I’ll screw it up!” They manifest constant indecision and worrying about
their mistakes, and they are full of regretful ruminations as they live in the
past. They can’t live by their decisions, and they are unable or unwilling to
use their gifts in the service of others. They don’t feel “enough” to do so.
They were continuously accused, abused and wrong-made as a child, and
they ended up deeply self-distrusting.

**************************************

“You can’t make me!” They are in effect determined to stay as sick as they
are, and they utilize an invalidating, arguing for their limitations and “Yes,
but. . .” process to do so. They are the product of a severely undermining
dysfunctional family who only gave meager attention to them when they
were behaving in a self-defeating and self-destructive manner.

ANESTHETIC EJACULATION (Loss of sexual feeling during climax by a

male)

“Strong, silent type.” They have great difficulty expressing their emotions,
and they fear vulnerability like the plague. They were made to feel that they
had to be the “Rock of Gibraltar” for their family -- to never waver, show
needs, express feelings, display anxiety, etc.

**************************************

98
“How’m I doin’?!” They have a strong performance-anxiety in everything,
and it extends to the sexual sphere. It was made perfectly clear to them that
their “love line” was contingent upon perfectionistic performance when
they were a child.

**************************************

“Service trip.” They are trying to “make sure that she’s satisfied.” It is still
another expression of their “mother-rescue” and over-responsible pattern. It
came about from having had to serve as their mother’s confidante,
consultant and concubine all through their childhood.

**************************************

“Sexual shutdown.” They are in effect disgusted by, frightened of, or

enraged by sexual activity. It is the result of having been massively shame-
induced over their erotic nature, and of coming up in a severely repressive
household.

ANEURYSM (Bulging blood vessel in the brain)

“Serving themselves up on a platter.” They are a compulsive serve-aholic

who feels that they simply have to rescue any person, system or situation
that needs help. The trouble is that this is so draining, depriving and
derailing that their needs are not being met.

The net effect is that they are building to an explosion point in their heavily
repressed resentment about all this. It is the result of being in the “family
hoist” position in a significantly dysfunctional family who “put the blame
on Mame,” while simultaneously exploiting them.

ANGINA PECTORIS (Severe attacks of pain over the heart due to oxygen
deprivation)

“I’m late, I’m late!” They are a workaholic performance-addict who is

seeking approval from withholding and disapproving perfectionistic
standins for similar parents. For them, ultimate failure and final irrevocable
rejection are always just a breath away.

99
They are super time-urgent and schedule-fixated. They are always impatient
and in a hurry (to accomplish the “final victory” -- the “golden orb”-
winning achievement). They also have this “March Hare” worry that if they
don’t cover virtually all the bases in time, all will be lost. They are
outwardly extremely busy, while they are ignoring their inner world and
their loved ones. The attacks are a strong warning that their attention is not
where it should be. (See HEART PROBLEMS)

ANKLE PROBLEMS

“Over-responsible.” They are operating with a lot of guilty rigidity and an

inability to receive pleasure and support. They are too accommodating,
cooperative, understanding, and respectful of the opinions and beliefs of
others. They are too concerned for others’ welfare, and they have difficulty
advancing towards their own goals, making progress, and achieving
success.

They have a difficult time keeping a balance between their healthy selfing
aspirations and their concern for others, their community commitment and
their humble respect for the Cosmos.

Their family put them in a “Cinderella” -- “family hoist” position in which

they sustained and held the family together, while they simultaneously
received constant blame for everything that went wrong, with no
acknowledgment of who they were, of their needs, or of their contributions.

*************************************

“Help me, I’m falling!” They have deep fears of failure, and they have real
trouble with mobility and direction-taking. They have a rather poorly
developed sense of support from the Universe, and they don’t have a firm
set of values to stand on. They also feel quite vulnerable and uncertain in
their present situation. They were left more or less to fend for themselves in
a severely self-immersed, unstable and dysfunctional family.

*************************************

100
“Straight-jacketed!” They feel fettered and hemmed in by their social
group, culture or organization. There is a conflict between their pride, self-
importance and self-satisfaction on the one hand, and the need for
community commitment and Cosmic contribution on the other. They have
illusions of self-inflation concerning their goals and objectives. They are
inflexible about changing direction, and they lack universal friendship,
sticking strictly to family and familiar friends.

They fail to recognize good, due to lack of love in their early life. They
were effectively ignored until they got old enough to coerce control and
demand attention and their rights, at which point the family capitulated
while conveying that they were a “moral cretin” for functioning the way
they do, with many messages that they should be more considerate of the
ecology in a guilt-inducing but ineffectual complaint to the “monster” they
themselves created.

RIGHT ANKLE

“I’m not doing it right.” They have conflicts over the methods they are
using to seek success. They have ethical issues about the procedures used
for progress arising from their sense of not having the right to any resources
that resulted from their overactive over-responsibility.

*********************************

“I can’t do it.” They feel utterly incompetent and incapable of coping

effectively, arising out of their sense of being lost at sea without a rudder.

*********************************

“How can I do it?” They are conflicted as to which methods to use to

achieve the most impactful and self-serving results, out of their being
hugely ham-strung and inflexible.

LEFT ANKLE

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have issues about the nature of their motivations
and intentions. They are either concerned about the ecological impact of

101
their desired outcomes, or they are guilty about their seeking success or
they are going for goals out of over-responsibility.

*********************************

“Success-avoidance.” They have the feeling that they somehow at some

deep level don’t want to succeed in life, and they are rather intensely self-
distrusting, due to feeling unequipped to cope.

*********************************

“Pulling in their horns.” The issue is the fact that they have to “trim their
sails” in deference to public opinion, a fact which they find most offensive.
They consider themselves to be too important a personage to have to settle
for such restrictions, at least on the surface. However, deep down inside,
there is a great deal of guilt about how heavy-heartedly they deal with the
world, a pattern over which they feel they have no control.

ANKLE BONE PROBLEMS

“Can’t do it.” They have a fear that they don’t have what it takes to make it
and to carry out their overload of responsibilities.

RIGHT ANKLE BONE PROBLEMS

“I’ll screw it up.” There is intense competence-anxiety about their ability to

carry out their responsibilities.

LEFT ANKLE BONE PROBLEMS

“I don’t want to do it!” They are having intense internal conflicts about the
responsibilities they are carrying.

BROKEN ANKLE

“Where am I going!?” They have profound conflict and confusion about

what direction to take in life. There is a deep need to straighten out the
twists in their life, to clear out the “kinks,” to change their direction. It may
accompany a trauma or unexpected change in their life.

102
The result is total confusion about where they should be going and a very
deep hurt and disorientation about their standing, security, purpose and
direction in the world. They grew up in a confusion-inducing and rather
undirected or even chaotic dysfunctional family in which it was never clear
what was required for any given situation, and in which they therefore had
to go along with whatever was happening.

BROKEN RIGHT ANKLE

“What if…?” They have deep conflicts about how they are going about
doing things. There is a clear imperative to change their ways of
accomplishing things, but they have no idea what to substitute.

BROKEN LEFT ANKLE

“Who am I?” They have profoundly disturbing concerns about their

fundamental motivations and intentions in life. They are utterly confused
and conflicted about where they stand on just about everything.

“SPRAINED” ANKLE (Stressed and/or damaged ligament)

“Oh no I don’t!” They do not want to move in a certain direction in life.

They are experiencing strong resistance and anger about this issue. They
distrust the Universe, and they have catastrophic expectations regarding the
outcome. They have always had to handle things more or less alone on their
own from the very beginning, and they are therefore very incensed at
having the Universe “cattle chute” them into this dilemma. It has not gone
well for them in the past, and they don’t expect any better now.

They have the “delusion of indifference,” the feeling that nobody gives a
damn and that they have to take care of everything themselves, as a
function of very early and continued lack of support and nurturance.

“SPRAINED” RIGHT ANKLE

“No way, Jose!” They are in great conflict and resistance about being forced
to change the way they do things, especially in regards to having to let
others participate more in their undertakings.

103
“SPRAINED” LEFT ANKLE

“What are you DOING!?” They are having quite a relational issue with the
“Home Office” about the required changes in their priorities and directions
in their life. They don’t like the vulnerability and interdependency that are
now being required of them one iota.

SWOLLEN ANKLE

“Slave feelings.” They feel exploited and unappreciated, and that they are in
an unequal exchange of energy situation. They have the feeling that they are
strung out six ways to breakfast, yet they can’t find a way out of it. Their
experience is that there is no end of the overloading requirements of being
here.

SWOLLEN RIGHT ANKLE

“Over-burdened.” They feel they are being required to do too much in the
realm of being the support system for everyone.

SWOLLEN LEFT ANKLE

“Me last.” Their experience is that they are not being allowed to take care
of their own needs due to excessive requirements of them.

“TWISTED” (Stressed) ANKLE

“Who am I?” Their sense of identity and of who they are has given way.
Their support structure of values and spiritual orientation is unclear, and
nothing is straight-forward and sensible any more.

Things have become confused and distorted, and the direction they are
going is in conflict with their inner foundations. There is an unsettling
change in their life that has resulted in their not knowing where they stand
on things.

It is a return of an old, familiar feeling arising from the “nothing is as it

seems” dysfunctional family. In effect, any decision ran into hidden agenda
derailments or detrimental outcomes.

104
“TWISTED” RIGHT ANKLE

“How do I do it?” They are considerably confused about how they should
go about the business of accomplishing their intentions in life at this point.

“TWISTED” LEFT ANKLE

“Which way should I go?” They are uncertain about what direction their
life should take at this point. Things have changed, and they don’t know
what they value or intend as their purpose at the moment.

ANKYLOSING SPONDYLITIS (See SPINE PROBLEMS)

ANORECTAL BLEEDING (See ANAL PROBLEMS)

ANOREXIA (Self-starvation)

“I’m awful!” They are suffering from extreme fear, self-revulsion and self-
rejection. They feel incapable of meeting the demands made on them, they
feel it is completely unsafe to be themselves, and they feel totally unable to
please their mother in their head. They feel nagged at, crowded in upon, and
disallowed their own identity.

They have a desperate need for emotional nourishment, unconditional

acceptance, and loving affection that is creating a severe emptiness inside
that is demanding satisfaction. They are attempting to “starve the
emptiness,” in the hope that it will go away and demand less.

They have episodes of intense desires to die, due to their utter self-disgust,
severe emotional deprivation, and emotional starvation. Their emotional
needs are experienced as just being too great to live with.

Their mother made it crystal clear that any form of neediness or self-
commitment, self-development and self-empowerment would lead to
ultimate and lethal abandonment. They are therefore trying to prevent
sexual maturity and growing up, and they demand exaggerated control of
events.

105
They are trying to be “pure,” non-physical, strictly mental, and ethereally
spiritual, in a systematic refusal to grow up. They are attempting to remain
a “genderless child” as an act of appeasement to “Godzilla” (their mother).
They systematically deny themselves the right to life in so doing.

ANOXIA (See OXYGEN DEPRIVATION, USUALLY DURING BIRTH)

ANTHRAX (Severe skin eruptions and boils-caught from cattle)

“Fulminating fury.” They are struggling with an intense suppressed rage

and seething injustice-nurturing around deprivations and degradations that
they have experienced and/or that they are experiencing.

It is a long-standing pattern that is now coming to a boil for purposes of

healing, or as a result of things coming to a head in their life around this
issue of being betrayed, belittled or bedeviled. It is the result of a passive-
aggressive dysfunctional family.

APHASIA (Inability to form words; inability to speak)

“Struck dumb.” Life has been so inhospitable that they can’t find words to
express their experience. They comprehend much more than those around
them could handle and/or they were given a very strong “to be seen but not
heard from” message as a child.

In any case, it is an annihilation-anxiety and/or a world-destruction fear that

was instilled by the fact that there was a gross mis-match between what
they experienced/perceived/knew and what their family could tolerate
hearing about and there was a very strongly threatening response to their
attempts to speak their truth.

APNEA (Interruptions in breathing)

“Maternal deprivation.” They are intensely sensitive, fearful and longing for
mother love or love from someone close. They are full of family taboos,
social restrictions and moral inhibitions, all learned in an intensely
repressive family, which forced a pleasing/appeasing/placating “model
child” adjustment on them.

106
There is a lot of disappointment, bitterness, unforgivingness and resentment
of being over-worked. At the same time, they dare not express or even
acknowledge these feelings, out of fear of total rejection and abandonment.
They have a great deal of deep-seated guilt, shame and grief arising out of
this.

They are joy-avoidant, happiness-squashing, and love-deflecting, all in the

misguided hope that they will thereby finally earn the “God Housekeeping
Seal of Approval.” In effect, they are so self-suppressing that they are in
effect suffocating themselves. They have become fatalistic, hostility-
repressing, compulsively over-giving, hyper-sensitive, and lonely.

“APOPLEXY” (See “STROKE”)

APPENDICITIS

“Raw nerves.” They have lost the ability to filter and protect themselves
from the impacts and imports of incoming realities. There is a lot of
unrealistic fear of life and a blocking of the flow of the good things in life,
due to self-hate, self-disgust and guilty self-attack.

They have a real lack of compassion for themselves and a deep

dissatisfaction, with many unfulfilled desires. They are ruminating over
residuals of the past with much self-recrimination. There is a good deal of
emotional commotion, along with many unruly feelings that they don’t
know how to handle.

All of this arises from their having taken in the poisons of their intensely
guilt-and shame-inducing dysfunctional family and their subsequent
standins. They are now poisoning themselves with the “foods” they got at
home in their childhood. They feel very unsafe with their inner feelings and
in the world, because their family made them so, out of their fears.

APPENDECTOMY

“Cut!” The removal of the poisoning appendix marks the end of this pattern
of self-poisoning, as they prepare to enter their destiny armed with the
lessons, resources and wisdom generated by their experiential history.

107
These capabilities will be used to heal, teach and liberate others from
similar fates by individuals who are sufficiently evolved to manifest such
contributions.

APPENDIX “BURST”

“Do it or die!” Their body has given the ultimate ultimatum. They have
absorbed and self-administered so much poison into their system that it is
no longer possible to continue living in this manner. It went too far, and
now is the hour to terminate the pattern and remove the poisons
immediately and permanently -- or else.

APPETITE, EXCESSIVE

“Self-defensive stuffing.” They are feeling the need for protection, due to
feeling unloved and rejected. They are judging their emotions and fearing
judgment from others, and they are feeling-suppressing and feeling-
avoiding, afraid of their emotions. As a result, they are avoiding looking
within for answers to their situation. They are “stuffing themselves” instead.
It arose in a highly suppressive and rejecting household.

APPETITE, LOSS OF

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are not trusting life, and they are feeling the
need to protect themselves. They disapprove of themselves, and they feel
very unsafe in the world. They tend to see saber tooth tigers everywhere,
and they also are in effect “running on empty,” in a despairing depression
reaction to their quality of life. They were treated as if they were unfit for
human consumption, while simultaneously being possessively engulfed by
their family. The current circumstances are bringing all this to the surface
by reinstating some of the conditions of their childhood.

ARM PROBLEMS

“Lost in space.” They have difficulty or an inability to hold the experiences

of life, and they have trouble grasping ideas or upholding their convictions
or perceptions of reality. As a result, there is a propensity to competence-

108
anxiety and/or under-achievement. They were systematically competence-
undermined by their enmeshed and yet rejecting family.

*************************************

“I’ll save ya!” They tend to be over-responsible, and to deny themselves

what they need, in favor of meeting others’ needs and rescue-tripping. They
focus on obligations and assigned duties with a heavily moralistic and firm
determination to fill responsibilities, maintain moral strength, and keep up
their tenacity. They were the “competent one” in the family, which resulted
in high expectations, perfectionistic standards, and the threat of
abandonment if they didn’t perform “up to snuff.”

*************************************

“Closed heart.” They are having real difficulty in making contact with their
heart flow and heart feelings, along with a problem connecting with the
world in a feeling-expressing manner. They have problems putting probes
into the world so as to comprehend the world around them.

They experience hassles with interpersonal connection, with relationships,

and with expressing feelings. They are unable to give and receive, and they
have poor communication and interaction with other people.

There is a certain lack of the use of the creative principle, in a pattern of

rigidity and unoriginality. There is a real problem with embracing life, and
they have sealed off their heart. They come from a suppressive and
untrustworthy family.

*************************************

“Moral cretins!” They feel that others lack skill and commitment, and that
they are unfair and unjust in their functioning. There is an underlying deep-
seated resentment of others’ lack of competence, concern and cooperation.
They were the “family hoist” who intensely resented all the excessive
responsibility and the relative lack of it displayed by other family members.

*************************************

109
“Taken for granted.” They have a good deal of indignation about not
receiving expected recognition for performances and executing their duties.
They feel that they have to do it all themselves, and they are rather fixed on
their way of doing things in a judgmental, conservative and wrong-making
manner. They were the behind-the-scenes support person in a highly
dysfunctional and highly conditionally accepting family.

RIGHT ARM

“Shrinking violet.” They are having difficulty in manifesting assertiveness

and confidence. They are feeling incompetent and unintelligent, like they
really don’t know what they are doing -- the “I’m a fraud” feelings. They
fear they aren’t performing up to snuff, and they worry about getting
caught, leading to their pulling muscles, receiving blows, or in other ways
incapacitating their arm.

LEFT ARM

“A-frame lifestyle.” They have feelings of powerlessness as a person, and

of not being in control of their life, in a co-dependent mentality. Yet at the
same time, they are afraid to express their lovingness and gentleness, for
fear of exploitation or incompetence in expression.

FOREARM

“Moral cretin.” They have shame over having wants, needs and desires.
They feel it is morally wrong to have these requirements. It comes from an
intensely accusatory and/or convenience-concerned parenting pattern.

RIGHT FOREARM

“How do I do it right?” They are experiencing conflicts and difficulties

concerning their methods of meeting their needs, wants and desires, and of
bringing things to the fore. They fear being punished for being inferior or
insufficient.

LEFT FOREARM

110
“Self-suppressing.” They are having difficulties in expressing their needs,
wants and desires. They don’t feel they have the right, and they fear they
will be punished for being inadequate if they share their needs.

UPPER ARM

“I can’t make it right.” They have conflicts about their ability to manifest
their values and priorities, arising from a non-comprehending,
dysfunctional, incompetencing, belittling and/or accusatory family.

RIGHT UPPER ARM

“I can’t pull it off.” They have deep doubts about their strength and ability
to act on and change the environment. There are great concerns about their
means of manifesting their values and priorities, along with an
accompanying fear of discouraging results.

LEFT UPPER ARM

“What can I do?” They have concerns about their capability to express their
values, priorities and intentions in a manner that makes a difference. They
fear that they will become discouraged and demoralized in their efforts to
communicate in this realm.

BROKEN ARM

“Abrupt shift.” They are experiencing a sharp change in direction in their

life with regard to how they go about approaching things. Their heretofore
lifestyle, stance and interpretation system has led them to a place where
they are being forced to re-evaluate, re-formulate and/or re-integrate their
whole way of handling the world. They are the product of competence-
and/or confidence-undermining family.

BROKEN RIGHT ARM

“Implementation problems.” They are finding that their usual ways of doing
things are not working effectively any more.

BROKEN LEFT ARM

111
“Orientation problems.” They are encountering experiences that are telling
them that their position on things isn’t working any more.

ARM AWKWARDNESS

“I’d better not!” They have an inability to request or to take in, with the
result that there is little or no feeling flow or heart to their functioning.
There is a suppressed desire to choke someone (probably their mother or
her standin for so effectively cutting them off from the flow of life).

ARM PARALYSIS

“Hard hat.” They are manifesting a certain hardness and willfulness in their
functioning. They are disgusted with, and distrusting of others, and they
have the feeling that they have to do everything themselves. They were the
“odd one out” in their family, and they were more or less left to their own
devices from a very early age.

RIGHT ARM PARALYSIS

“Island unto themselves.” They are highly self-contained and self-focused,

and they have real reluctance to give to others.

LEFT ARM PARALYSIS

“What are they up to now?” They are having problems in trusting and
valuing what others have to offer, and they are resistant to receiving.

ARMPIT PROBLEMS

“They’re gonna get me!” They are manifesting issues around vulnerability
and intimacy. Their experience is that they don’t dare become merged for
fear of what would happen if they “broke the Law” by doing so. They have
the feeling that it is dangerous or immoral to be what they are, and to have
the lifestyle they have. They are ashamed for being themselves, and they
are afraid of attack from the environment for being who they are. They
were systematically made “wrong, bad and evil” for being themselves by
their dysfunctional family.

112
RIGHT ARMPIT

“I’m going about it all wrong.” They have guilt over how they go about
doing things and their way of handling life.

LEFT ARMPIT

“Moral cretin.” They feel shame for having the feelings, motivations,
intentions and values that they have.

ARRHYTHMIA (Heart rate fluctuations)

“False alarms.” They are a self-made person who believes that they are all
they’ve got. They have felt cut off from the environment and the Universe
all their life, and that they therefore have to handle everything on their own
hook, unassisted.

This activates moments where things are getting out of control and beyond
their coping capabilities. These bring on anxiety attacks and the resulting
palpitations. It is the result of never having received love and merging as a
child.

*************************************

“Fluttering infatuations.” They have a fundamental inconsistency in their

love nature -- it comes and goes, and they can’t maintain a steady love state,
input or relationship. It reflects the instability of the nature of the close
relationships in their family.

ARTERIOSCLEROSIS (Hardening and fat-lining of the arteries)

“Walking the plank.” There is an underlying rather severe depression, and

they dread old age. They have a profound fear of accepting joy and of
flowing with life, and as a result, their life flow is actually being blocked.
They are incapable of expressing their feelings and emotions, and there are
a lot of accumulated unresolved issues as a result. This all arose from a
subtly or not-so-subtly untrustworthy early mothering and later parenting.

*************************************

113
“God is Al Capone!” They have a deep distrust of the Universe and of God.
They have therefore closed down and become hard-nosed and rigid, with a
willful and hostile approach to the world. They believe that there is no such
thing as goodness in the world, and they are rigidly closed-minded and
narrow in their viewpoint. They have lost the capacity to love and be loved,
as they react to a profound underlying self-dislike, with an over-criticizing,
arrogant and opinionated manner.

They are intensely judgmental, and they put out a great deal of criticism.
They are fiercely resistant, hardened and narrow-minded, with a great deal
of tension and an adamant refusal to see good in anything or anyone.

They have a furious intent to completely control their own life, and they
have no intention of letting God or anyone else have any say or influence
the flow of their life. They are forever rushing, hurrying, worrying, and
trying to block and outwit those who would “bleed them dry” and who
would “take the fat of the land” from them. To them, love and joy are a
cruel joke -- a fabrication for the foolish -- and they are the “complete
Scrooge.” They were treated like they were the “intimate enemy,” at one
level or another.

ARTERIOSCLEROTIC DEMENTIA (Progressive but “patchy” loss of

mental functions)

“I can’t keep up.” They are engaged in a refusal to deal with the world as it
is, out of an enraged helplessness and hopelessness. They feel overwhelmed
by the requirements of life and that they are unable to cope any more. There
is a great deal of bitterness and disgust with the Universe and the “Home
Office.” They are having an “I’m taking my marbles and going home!”
reaction.

This is a pattern that got started early in life, when they had to face an
uncaring and even hostilely demanding environment, which had a
demoralizing effect on them. Their response to this was to set up a self-
fulfilling prophecy effect in which they repeatedly found themselves in re-
creations of their formative environment. They kept up as long as they
could, and now they have decided that enough is enough, and they are
“throwing in the towel” and exiting stage left, slowly.

114
ARTERY PROBLEMS

“Joyless Joe/Jo.” They live out of a “Sydney Sober sides” -- “Grit and bear
it” orientation. To them, life is one long problem to be solved and a very
serious business, indeed. They have a rather pronounced tendency to be
something of a gloom-and doom-sayer or of a militaristic martinet. They
have lost the ability to feel and express love, and they tend to be hard and
bitter. It arises from a “there is no joy in Bloodville” type of dysfunctional
family, where they were the one who had to maintain sanity and to deflect
disaster.

ARTHRALGIA (See PAIN IN THE JOINTS)

ARTHRITIC FINGERS (See FINGER PROBLEMS)

ARTHRITIC HANDS (See HAND PROBLEMS)

ARTHRITIS (Inflamed, painful and stiff joints)

“Left in the lurch.” Their experience is that they have in effect betrayed by
the Cosmos, in that bad things keep happening to this good person. Their
experience is that the Universe is unjust and that they in effect “bought a
pig in a poke” by coming in here. There is a good deal of suppressed and
restrained resentment about that, resulting in a “binding up” of their ability
to take action and do things.

It got started in an untrustworthy, capricious, dysfunctional family who did

indeed abandon them and leave them to their own devices in a self-
immersed and harmful manner.

*************************************

“Straight-jacketed.” They have a pronounced tendency to immobilization,

self-criticism, lack of self-worth, fear, anger, and a feeling of being tied
down, restricted and confined. They desperately want to be free to move
around and to make something of themselves. They are chronically anxious
and depressed, and they are afraid of being angry because it is “wrong, bad
and evil.”

115
They feel unloved, with a resulting resentful bitterness and a critical
judgmentalness towards others. They are not allowing themselves to
develop their full potential, due to self-distrust, leading to severe
constraints. They are suffering from a lot of suppressed resentment, which
tends to result in passive-aggressive behavior. They are self-suppressing
and self-thwarting. They are the product of perfectionistic parenting in
which in effect they could never measure up.

*************************************

“Right and righteous.” They are very blaming and critical of people, and
they are convinced that others won’t help them. They are quite angry that
people won’t “carry their load,” so that they have to take on what they
consider an unjust load.

They are quite fixed, rigid, intolerant and resistive in their functioning.
They operate with a strong will, inflexible intentions, intense opinions, and
an abiding inability to change with changing circumstances. They have a
bad case of the “hardening of the attitudes,” and they are highly rigid,
opinionated and “hung up in principles.”

There are long-standing maladjustments and stony incrustations based on

internal conflicts -- often between a desire to do something and a fear of
failure. They are full of projected self-disgust, finding in others what they
most dislike in themselves. They have great resistance and emotional
struggle, with habitual anxiety and fear, “negative faith,” and expectations
that of the worst-case scenario. They are forcefully opinion-pushing, and
they put out a steady stream of skeptical criticism. They are quite hostile,
and they are always angry and tense. Calcium growths indicate the presence
of hatred and a severely inflexible mind.

It all came from a “vast wasteland” and “dour destiny” type of family
culture in which they never knew when something would go wrong, just
that it would, sure as the sun rises. It all fell to them to do the necessaries,
because no one else could be trusted to do so or to do it right. No one was
ever there for them, and since everything that went down was their fault,
they also felt they didn’t deserve anyone to be there for them, bottom line.

116
(See RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS) [Also, see the body part(s) affected for
more information]

ARTICULATION PROBLEMS (Difficulties in speaking correctly)

“I don’t dare!” They have an abiding fear of being understood or of

speaking the truth or of sharing what they see/know. It comes from having
experienced “dynamite shed explosions” when they “lit a match to see
where they were,” or when they tried to share what was going on. It is the
result of a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

ASBESTOS POISONING (Mesothelioma)

“Polluted environment.” They are being invaded and permeated by

damaging influences in their surroundings. They are being subjected to
intolerable inputs and experiences. It is a repetition of their early
environment, where their dysfunctional family imposed a poisonous
atmosphere and contaminated their support systems. It is a message to them
to the effect of “Don’t pollute yourself any more!”

ASPHYXIATING ATTACKS (Sudden suffocations)

“Oh my GAWD!!” They are totally terrified of the process of life and of the
world. They have a fearful distrust of just about everything, and they feel
utterly unsafe in the world. The message in childhood was, “Don’t you dare
ever grow up and away or beyond our control!” They therefore got stuck in
childhood, afraid to grow up and take the world on its own terms.

DEATH BY ASPHYXIATION

“Moral monster.” They “choked to death” on their own guilt and shame.
They had the feeling that they should be thoroughly punished or even
destroyed for their “sins.” They were in effect convinced that they had no
right to exist and to take up space and resources. It was the result of an
extremely rejecting, accusation-attributing, blame-throwing, moralistic and
punitive parenting pattern.

*******************************

117
“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

ASSAULT VICTIM

“Sealed lips.” They have an inability to speak up for themselves. They are
too afraid to put it out there, for fear of the consequences. They also feel
that they simply don’t have the right. At the same time, they have a belief in
violence and rebelliousness against authority. It’s all based on a feeling of
worthlessness and deservingness of attack resulting from an assaultive
family environment.

*************************************

“I hate me!” They engage in systematic self-rejection induced by a severely

rejecting family. The incident is often set off either by too much success
(they “don’t deserve it”) or by demoralizing “demonstrations” of their
“worthlessness” or “evilness,” which trigger a frenzy of self-hatred.

*************************************

“Oh no you don’t!” It is a case of “destructive implants” going off in

reaction to their “crossing the forbidden line” towards manifesting their
destiny. The implant was built in as a part of an intense “keep them around
the old homestead” programming designed to maintain them as the
parent(s) “private preserve.”

*************************************

“Self-attack.” They operate out of a belief that they deserve a certain

amount of severely negative events. It arises from being told they were
“bad, wrong and evil” by their severely dysfunctional and
rejecting/blaming/accusing family.

*************************************

118
“Enraging the hulk.” They got into a situation where they provoked the
attacker by their behaving in a manner guaranteed to produce that result. It
arises from a variety of sources, including the two immediately above,
along with such things as a “macho” pattern, with its various underlying
dynamics.

*************************************

“Shit happens.” A certain proportion of events occur as a function of the

“random generator” that sees to it that we are always presented with non-
preset events as a growth expansion stimulus. It should be noted in this
regard that “shinola happens,” too.

ASTHMA

“Where’s Mommy!?” They are full of dependency conflicts generated by an

engulfing and yet emotionally unavailable mother. They are rather intensely
fearful of the world and of the demands of life, feeling that they don’t have
what it takes to make it. They have a lot of subconscious dependency needs,
and they are hyper-sensitive to threat and to stimulation.

*************************************

“Alone on my own.” They have an overwhelming fear of God, coupled

with a profound separation-paranoia. They try to take on too much and to
be too much an island unto themselves. They also have a pronounced
tendency to self-destructiveness arising from deep-seated guilt and shame.
There is an inability to breathe for themselves and a systematic suppression
of any form of crying, due to guilt-inducing “smother love.”

*************************************

“Mother-smothered.” They feel suppressed and dominated by their mother,

yet at the same time that it is unsafe to take charge of their own life. They
are full of ideas to get ahead, but they are also afraid of pushing on against
opposition, should they fail.

119
They are intensely inhibited against free expression, and they are plagued
by the unresolved guilt and suppressed grief that got started in their
childhood. They want to raise objections and to take charge of their life, but
they find that they can’t. They are the product of an oppressive “keep ‘em
around the old homestead” household.

*************************************

“Out of sync.” They are out of step and in disharmony with their
environment. They are very dependent and afraid to break away from their
family, yet they want to control and dominate at the same time. They are a
potential leader and independent thinker who is chafing at the bit under
what feels like oppressive authority-domination.

They feel held back by fools, unrecognized for their true value and talents,
and not given the high place they feel they deserve. So they force
themselves to “perform” to “prove themselves to the boss.” They grew up
in an authoritarian and simultaneously engulfing family environment.

*************************************

“Mother-fixation.” They have a strong ambivalence towards their mother

and against mother standins. They feel “left out in the cold” by such
persons, in an unloved and rejected, disapproved of and shut out
experience. They try to avoid and ignore that person or situation, to shut it
out.

They have many unmet dependency needs induced by a domineering and

rejecting mother who played upon sibling rivalry competition for her scarce
love supply. As a result, they are fatalistic, hostility-repressing, compulsive,
over giving, hyper-sensitive, and lonely, with a very low self-esteem.

*************************************

“Royally pissed off.” They have a lot of disappointment, bitterness,

unforgivingness and over-worked resentment. There is an inability to
resolve this resentment of theirs, with a resulting rejecting of the breath of
life and an emotional suffocation. There is also a deep fear of letting go of

120
childhood and a severe inner crying. They are intensely sensitive, fearful
and longing for mother love or for love from someone close, because they
were in effect rejected and ejected by a cold and unloving mother.

*************************************

“Abandonment-paranoia.” They have a rather pronounced possessiveness

and jealousy, so they can breathe in, but they constrict on the exhale -- they
can’t let go. They had to cope with a highly ambivalent mother who
subjected them to intense acceptance/rejection conflicting messages and
games.

*************************************

“Model child.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, and moral
inhibitions, all learned in an intensely repressive family which forced an
inhibited/intimidated adjustment pattern on them. They are joy-avoidant,
happiness-squashing, and love-deflecting, all in the misguided hope that
they will thereby earn the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval,” with the
result that they will then finally be allowed to grow up and away from their
family.

They are full of suppressed grieving and unacknowledged mourning, and

they have a dampened zest for life, due to their stifling and totally engulfing
yet abandonment-threatening childhood environment. There was
intrauterine, prenatal and post-partum trauma, and when they are under
stress or when they are vulnerable, they feel that the world is decidedly not
a safe place to be.

EXERCISE-INDUCED ASTHMA

“Potency-guilt.” They have an uneasy feeling that it is “bad, wrong and

evil” for them to be effective and impactful at a deep level.

They are the product of a “reversed role parenting” situation in which they
were in effect required to mother their mother, who became paranoid of
them when they invested in or manifested their personal potency and
destiny.

121
ASTHMA IN BABIES

“There must be some way out of here!” They are suffering from a great fear
of the world and of life, and they decidedly do not want to be here, and they
want outta here. They feel completely unsafe, unwanted, unwelcome and
intensely rejected. It is due to a hostilely smothering and/or cold and
rejecting mother, or due to a situation that generates that feeling.

ASTHMA IN CHILDREN

“Tie that grinds.” They have many of the same dynamics as in adults,
arising from a rejecting and repressive, yet engulfing and symbiotically
dependent home environment, especially with regard to the mother’s
manner of being.

ASTIGMATISM (See VISION PROBLEMS)

ASYNERGY (See “AWKWARDNESS”)

ATACTILIA (See LOSS OF THE SENSE OF TOUCH)

ATAXIA (See LOSS OF COORDINATION)

ATHETOSIS (Repetitive involuntary movements)

“Who’s pulling their strings?” They were never really allowed to have a
will of their own. They were subjected to severe competence-and
confidence-undermining by their mother, who was either afraid of their
power and/or afraid of losing them, and who also had a great deal of rage
that was elicited by the individual’s presence, demands, and/or
characteristics.

ATHLETE’S FOOT

“Rejection reaction.” They are undergoing frustration at not being accepted,

and they have a fear of being “unfit for human consumption.” This arose
from severely conditional love from their parents, and they experienced a
great deal of “never good enough” messaging as a child.

122
 *************************************

“Stuck in place.” There is a propensity to have an inability to move forward

with ease. There is a low-level fear of failure and of moving ahead, along
with an underlying self-disapproval. They are also mentally agitated with
the direction their life is taking. They are the product of a confidence-and
competence-undermining enmeshed family.

RIGHT FOOT ATHLETE’S FOOT

“Success-in-the-world issues.” They are not sure that they should seek
success or how to attain it.

LEFT FOOT ATHLETE’S FOOT

“Self-doubt.” They aren’t sure they have what it takes to be an effective

human being.

(See the area(s) involved for more information -- particularly in TOE and
TOE INTER-SPACE PROBLEMS)

ATHROMBIA (See INABILITY TO FORM BLOOD CLOTS)

AUTO-IMMUNE DISORDER (Immune system attacks their own body in

an over-reactive manner)

“What am I doing here?” They are manifesting a dismayed

discombobulation about the world and the way their life is going. It is the
result of growing up in a vaguely overwhelmed and enmeshed family or out
of being here as a “visitor” from another soul pool for soul experience and
destiny-manifestation purposes.

*************************************

“Hapless, helpless, hopeless.” They have a great deal of sorrow, deep-seated

grief, and despair, and they are chronically crying on the inside. They feel
overwhelmed and unable to handle the requirements of life. They have in
effect “thrown in the towel” on even trying to make it in life. They come
from a massively dysfunctional and demoralizing family.

123
 *************************************

“Allergic reaction to themselves.” They feel somehow responsible for all

the ills of the world, which they are the cause, and they are having a “get rid
of the problem” response. They have ended up with little or no ability to
receive or to request or to require a return in kind.

It is a result of having “carried the world on their shoulders” all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family. They were told in effect that they
were the source of all the family’s problems, while they were actually the
only one who was deflecting some of the disasters.

AUTO-IMMUNE HYPOGLYCEMIA (Excessive insulin production due to

anti-bodies, leading to abnormal insulin fluctuations to cope with the anti-
bodies)

“Don’t deserve it!” They are systematically engaged in resistance to the

sweet part of life, resulting in a continuous ambivalent reaction to good
things happening for them. They have to constantly grapple with self-
rejection and guilt feelings. It comes from messaging from the most
rejecting parent that they are a continuous problem, when in fact, they have
always been the solution to problems in their nature and functioning. They
were a threat and a guilt-induction to that parent.

AUTO-INTOXICATION (See SELF-POISONING)

AVIAN FLU (“BIRD FLU”)

“Urban hermit.” There is an insufficient involvement and interaction with

the world, in a kind of “among us but not of us” pattern. Underneath is a
buried rage and resentment about being so alone, alien and alienated. It
comes from growing up in a family in which they could do no right, as the
unrecognized and unacknowledged “family hoist” upon whom everyone
depended and whom no one supported, sustained or validated.

***************************************

124
“At their mercy.” They have feelings of being under the influence of
malevolent forces and of being weak and helpless. There is a good deal of
internal conflict, confusion and susceptibility to suggestion, especially from
the “world of agreement” or the “group mind” or “statistical proofs.” It may
reflect the vulnerability feelings that accompany times and processes of
great change.

There is a fear of attack from others and of taking life in fully. They have a
strong feeling of a lack of support and protection. They have the experience
that the very worst is about to happen to them. They are the product of
severely untrustworthy parenting, arising out of a deeply fearful family.

***************************************

“Barking up the wrong tree.” They tend to get into consuming passionate
commitments that lead nowhere, and to get into repeated disturbing
unrequited love situations. They have a sensitive mind and a very strong
sense of justice, righteousness and generosity that frequently leads them
into blind alleys and exploitative situations and relationships.

They are feeling that they are always in “the tie that grinds” relationships in
which they feel totally stifled by over-close and/or dominating partners.
They feel that they are being overwhelmed and restricted, and they are very
angry about it. They don’t feel that they can do or say anything about it, for
fear of catastrophic consequences.

They come from an authoritarian, oppressive and possessive dysfunctional

family in which they held a “reversed role parenting” situation that led to
their repeatedly trying to rescue their family from their self-defeating
patterns.

***************************************

“Self-suppression.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, unexpressed passions, strong desires and unexpressed intense
emotions. They don’t have any sense of freedom or the right or ability to
communicate their feelings. This was generated by a self-immersed and
dysfunctional family who were exploitative, shame-inducing and enmeshed.

125
 ***************************************

“Suppressed grief.” They are desperate and tired of life, due to generalized
disturbances in their processes and situation. They are having a “salt poured
into emotional wounds” experience that they are not being allowed to heal.

They are suffering under the influence of their lifelong suppressed sorrow.
They are fearful and anxious to the point of being overcome with
desperation and futility feelings, and they are struggling with confusion-
inducing emotional conflict. There is a failure to maintain immunity to
negative ideas. They are the product of a self-defeatingness-generating
dysfunctional family who instilled a sense of being hapless, helpless and
hopeless.

***************************************

“Deprivation City.” They have a real difficulty in taking in prana, chi, ki,
élan vitale, and love or life energy, as a function of their prideful brutalizing
misuse of energy in past lives. They have an inability to renew the breath of
life, along with lack of enthusiasm and zeal for living. They have a real
inability to take in life, and they don’t feel worthy of living life fully. They
are suffering from depression and chronic grief, because they are deeply
afraid of taking in life energy.

They are also joy-avoidant and happiness-squashing, out of a fear of the

Universe. They lack Cosmic, community and conjugal contact. They are
alone, sad and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance or approval.
They feel constantly in smothering and stifling environments, with a
resulting sense that life is dull and monotonous. They are the product of a
severely withholding and rejecting family.

***************************************

“My way or the highway!” They have a very strong ego that is getting in
their way. They tend to believe that theirs is the only way to fly, and they
are surrounded by people who not only don’t understand that, but who also
place restrictions on them and who “unfairly punish” them for their ways of

126
being and of doing things. They feel that they have to handle the whole of
life single-handed, with no help from any so-called friends.

While this has made for a modicum of success as a survival strategy, it has
cut them off from joy and love, and they can’t let people in or themselves
out to merge, and that is now taking its toll. They are the product of a
supremely selfish “everyone for themselves” authoritarian and patriarchal
family.

***************************************

“Bitter resentfulness.” They are wasting away, due to selfishness, intense

possessiveness, cruel thoughts and vengefulness. They feel that they have
done their level best in a valiant effort, but that circumstances wouldn’t
have it so. In addition, there is also a large spiteful revenge streak playing a
major part in this process. They are given to resentfully imagined guilt and
remorse reactions from their people as an ego balm – “see, now they’re
sorry for what they’ve done!”

They have unhappy love affairs, resulting in disappointment, disgust,

unforgivingness and clutchingness. They feel unappreciated, and they play
out a “Camille” scenario in which their feeling is, “They’ll be sorry when
I’m gone!” They are selfishly clinging and controlling, they are slyly
passive-aggressive, and they are full of “Feel sorry for me!” strategies. In
the meantime, they are seeking an “easeful death.” It is the result of their
having had a “special” role as a child in their severely passive-aggressive
dysfunctional family, and they have never gotten over or wanted to
relinquish it.

***************************************

“No right to exist.” They feel unworthy of living, and they are suffocating
from a chronic self-disgust reaction. They are full of angry punishment-
deservingness feelings, with accompanying self-destructive motivations and
manifestations. They are capitulating and giving up, in an extreme
underlying abandonment depression around feeling rejected by God and of
being ejected from the Cosmos.

127
It is the result of being massively neglected, rejected, accused and wrong-
made by a severely judgmental dysfunctional family. There was a highly
self-immersed, self-serving and blame-throwing mother who gave them a
strong “If it weren’t for you!” message. She simultaneously put “You can
do no right!” accusations out continuously, along with expecting them to
“make it all better” -- an utter impossibility.

They are now having an “Enough is enough!” reaction, and they are
“heading on out.” They are desperately tired of life, due to lifelong severe
suppressed grief and emotional deprivation. They are fearful and anxious,
and they are in effect too devastated to take it any more.

This all started up with an effective emotional abandonment at an early age,

to which they reacted by becoming a self-contained self-made person with a
“portable Plexiglas phone booth” around them. So they are leaving now.
Thank you and goodbye!

AVITAMINOSIS (See VITAMIN DEFICIENCY)

“AWKWARDNESS”

“Geek.” They are a clumsy, graceless and sad perennial adolescent who is
an “all work and no play” type of person. They underwent a forced hyper-
maturity from an early age by a needy and demanding parent, usually their
mother. There was a strong “Don’t be you!” injunction, along with a “Be
my mother/father!” requirement, with parental death-deflecting and
personal survival as the motivators.

They developed a split identity, due to contradictory demands to be the

parent for the whole family while simultaneously avoiding any and all
competences that would lead to their growing away and abandoning the
family.

There was merciless denigration of their associates and systematic attacking

of any attempts at friendship, social involvement, or social skill
development by the family maternal orbit.

*************************************

128
“Competence-anxiety.” They feel loveless, confused, worthless, and
profoundly lacking in confidence. They are deeply fearful of the world, and
they tend to retreat into a world of their own making, independent of both
the world at large and the maternal dominion they experienced.

*************************************

“Hung up.” They are sexually terrified, yet they are simultaneously sexually
obsessed, due to “tantalizing tarantula” -- “seduce-slap” sex-ploitation and
simultaneous sexual suppression by their parent, usually their mother.
Underlying all this is a profound and seething volcanic resentment. They
are grimly nihilistic, pessimistic and resigned to a silent, somber solitude.
(See particular body part(s) involved for more information)

AXILLA PROBLEMS (See ARMPIT PROBLEMS)

Section 1

129
130
A

31

131
132
A

Type to enter text

32

133
33

34

35

36

37

38

39

40

41

134
42

43

44

45

46

47

48

49

135
50

51

52

53

54

55

56

57

58

136
59

60

61

62

63

64

65

66

137
BACKACHE

“Attack back.” They have a repressed desire to attack the environment

about their lack of emotional support from early in life on. They are over-
responsible, and they feel overloaded by all the excessive demands being
made of them, and they are quite resentful of it. It’s painful and heavy, and
they want to run away, to escape from it all. They can’t bring themselves to
do it.

They are guilt-ridden about sexuality, and they are self-condemning,

depressed and despairing. They feel trapped in the “tie that grinds” with
their engulfing and demanding parent, usually their mother. (See BACK
PROBLEMS)

BACK HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“The buck stops here.” They are intensely conflicted about their role in the
world and about their relationship to society. They are also caught up in the
“protector-provider” process or role in their life. They feel very strongly the
necessity to be the “bottom line resource,” and they both revel in it and
resent it.

They can’t decide how they feel about their process of “covering all the
bases.” It comes from their having been the foundational figure in their
dysfunctional family from a very early age.

*************************************

“Iceberg trip.” They are heavily under the influence of suppressed and
repressed out-of-awareness “shadow” emotions hidden away along the
spine and the backs of the legs. They keep these private parts of themselves
well hidden from themselves and everyone else, and they try to come from
a place of strength, force and masculine assertion. They are dominated in
their functioning by the anger, fear and over-congested grief arising from
their repressive family culture in which they had to be “impervious.”

BACK PROBLEMS

138
“Utter isolation.” There is a deep loneliness and sense of separation from
their loved ones and from the “Home Office.” They feel unsupported by
life, and they are unwilling to trust the Universe or to cooperate with the
Divine design. They feel that “God is Al Capone” and certainly not to be
trusted. It started in a non-supportive and intrusive family, and it reflects a
deep sense of frustration and separation from the “Source” that got started
in the intra-uterine or very early infancy period.

*************************************

“Failure-freak-out.” There is a real fear of losing, on both the pragmatic and

the ultimate planes. As a result, they are intensely self-determining and
willful, and they refuse to give up their control or power. They are, in effect,
a super-self-sustaining and self-contained “island unto themselves,” and
they have great difficulty and conflicts with intimates.

They feel that they have to protect themselves against threats and assaults,
and they feel that have to shield off the heart area from further hurt. They
also feel that they want people to get off their back. They are the product of
an intensely competitive and sibling rivalry-generating family.

*************************************

“I don’t see me being it.” They tend to “dump” their unacceptable qualities,
feelings, functioning’s and deeds “behind them,” so they can’t see them,
and then they have the experience of having a bad back. It comes from
growing up in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Skid Row Syd.” There are often financial and worth concerns, reflecting an
underlying sense of non-deservingness of support and survival resources.
They have trouble dealing with emotional issues, and they feel overloaded
with emotional responsibilities. They were in effect excluded from their
family emotionally, while being held accountable for the emotional
difficulties in their family.

*************************************

139
“Will issues.” They experience many conflicts of will with others and
within themselves. They are either dominating of others or over-dependent
on others, both of which indicate a poor self-image and a sense of not being
deserving of support. There is a conflict between their conscious and their
unconscious, originating in conflicts with their parents or parent standins.

LOWER BACK PROBLEMS

“Overloaded.” This is their pivotal point for all body movements, their
leverage fulcrum for strength and the anchoring area for action -- it’s the
balance beam for the body.

It is also the foundation floor on which everything is built in the way of

being in the world. Their basic emotional support, financial sustenance and
physical subsistence and sense of security are located here.

When problems develop in this area, it means there is an imbalance of

power, an unequal exchange of energy, an experience of interfering
interventions, a sense of things being out of harmony. There results a
feeling of injustice and of being overburdened and under-supported. Indeed,
there is a strong sense of insufficient support and a great deal of agitation
over finances, with a considerable resentment over that. There is a notable
amount of grief over lack of basic support, both currently and in their
childhood.

There is a significant need for nurturance being displayed with lower back
problems. They were in effect abandoned at an early age emotionally.
Incidentally, this pattern can also develop or be precipitated or activated in
response to growing older.

*********************************

“Financial freak-out.” There is a fear of financial failure and about money,

and they have a deep insecurity over basic support. They feel at risk on the
survival level, and there are concerns about the need for protection.

They are full of self-doubt, competence-anxiety and worth concerns, and

they are having problems with the lack of the will or strength to overcome

140
the obstacles they face. They are success-avoidant, out of fear of
abandonment-annihilation that was built in during their early childhood.
They feel at risk on the survival level, because their home was not
supportive, and it was overloaded with excessive demands in their
childhood.

*********************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They find their situation of lack of connection and

support painful and heavy, and they want to run away, as they suppress a
desire to attack. They are therefore into over-control for fear of release of
aggression and of the misuse and abuse of power. They come from a family
who was into blame-throwing and accusation as an accountability-avoidant
strategy.

*********************************

“Sexual shame.” They are guilt-ridden about sexuality, due to sex-ploitative

parenting and to demands that they never commit to themselves or to
anyone or anything outside the family. They are over-responsible, self-
condemning, depressed and despairing.

RIGHT LOWER BACK

“But not for me.” They are having conflicts over the nature and/or
availability of environmental support systems and supplies. The feeling is
that there is not what is needed by them out there in one form or another,
and there is little or no trust of the environment to provide for their
fundamental needs. It arose in a dysfunctional family who were not able to
provide their basic life support systems and resources much of the time.

MIDDLE LOWER BACK

“God’s gonna kill me!” There is a considerable amount of annihilation-

anxiety and of survival concerns. Their feeling is that they are here on
“borrowed time,” and there is the real possibility of being “found out” in
this.

141
There is also their “run amok-anxiety,” the fear that they may “lose it” over
their situation of non-support and deprivation. It derives from strong
experiences of unacceptability or unwelcomeness from very early on.

LEFT LOWER BACK

“Leave me alone!” They have an inability to accept or to utilize intimate

emotional support and basic need-meeting. They are excessively self-
sufficient, in an “island unto themselves” pattern. They have a significant
trust of the Universe problem, due to early deprivation and
untrustworthiness of their maternal and intimate environment.

CANCER OF THE LOWER BACK

“Atlas trip.” They feel responsible for the well-being of the world around
them, and they are a “serve-aholic.” They carry the load of care-taking
everything and everyone.

As a result, they have a lot of inner conflict and strife all the time, but they
seek to hide that from others by “putting on a happy face.” They are
burdened with continuous emotional issues about which they feel they are
in no position to do anything. They were the “family hoist” in their
dependent and dysfunctional family. (See CANCER)

MIDDLE BACK

“What will people think?” This is the fulcrum of actions, and it sensitively
reflects the individual’s evaluations of their intentions and impacts. It is a
highly attuned response system around implication readouts. When trouble
develops here, it indicates that they fear environmental reactions and play-
outs to their release of themselves in a kind of “How will the world react?”
response.

It reflects catastrophic expectations about what would happen if they “let

themselves go,” in a kind of fundamental environmental fear. They are
afraid at some internal level that they are going to be “stabbed in the back,”
like they often were as a child.

142
 *******************************

“Perfectionistic standards.” They are intensely upright and uptight about

moral issues. They have considerable guilt over past actions, reactions,
intents and impacts, as they get stuck in all that “stuff” back there.

This reaction leads to “Get off my back!” feelings. It also involves a fear of
moving forward, and simultaneously of being “trapped in the past.” Still a
third response contained here is anxiety over lack of coping capabilities,
and about not having what it takes to handle the demands of life. It reflects
survival issues and fear about what might happen to them.

In addition, it is a manifestation of issues with personal power -- either

suppressed power or the abuse and corrupt use of power. Still another issue
is that they have difficulty in validating themselves, and in trusting
themselves to have what it takes to make it.

At base, problems here often reflect a need for reassurance of one type or
another. This whole pattern got started in an exploitative, oppressive and/or
dysfunctional family in which expressivity, responsibility, and personal
potency were systematically distorted and/or suppressed, with the result that
they have trouble in taking initiative action.

RIGHT MIDDLE BACK

“Can I pull it off?” Difficulties here reflect competence concerns, issues

with regard to their survival strategies, and problems with their defense
mechanisms. It has to do with questions concerning the adequacy of their
functioning. These problems usually reflect a fair amount of competence-
and/or confidence-undermining as a child.

MIDDLE-MIDDLE BACK

“Implication-anxiety.” They experience that “You never know what will

happen when you take action!” and their tendency is to take a basic
“Lewella” (“Leave well enough alone!”) stance. They grew up in a
dysfunctional and “magical mystery tour” unpredictable environment.

143
LEFT MIDDLE BACK

“Self-distrust.” Problems here center around their trust of themselves and

their motivations. It has to do with their relationship with their personal
potency, along with guilt complexes over past, current, intended, or
probable outcomes. Here, the family induced deep concerns about their
inner intentions.

UPPER BACK

“Self-love issues.” This area reflects self-acceptance issues that have not
been resolved over a number of lifetimes that must be resolved now. It
involves self-disgust, guilt, and felt responsibilities.

Problems here represent a felt need to “earn” love, a feeling that they don’t
deserve love, and a feeling that they don’t dare let love out or in. So they
hold back love and vulnerability to love. They feel unloved, unsupported
emotionally, while also simultaneously feeling overloaded with
responsibilities.

They were placed on a highly conditional love basis, and they ended up
feeling that they don’t deserve love -- that they have to earn it.

******************************

“Alone and alien.” There is stored anger and bitterness over unexpressed
feelings here, as well as feelings of being unlovable. They lack self-
approval, and they don’t have the feeling of Cosmic acceptability. They also
have a way of withholding and placing conditions on their love.

They were subjected to a lack of love and a lot of wrong-making, while at

the same time, they were being subjected to demands for the provision of
support for their family, in a kind of “Cinderella/Cinderfella syndrome.”

*******************************

“Over-responsible depressive.” They have an over-developed sense of

accountability and responsibility, and they take on excessive

144
responsibilities, while they are suppressing themselves and deflecting
vulnerability to love and support, in a “work-aholic” -- “serve-aholic”
pattern.

They have a good deal of frustration and irritation over not doing what they
really want to do, out of their over-developed sense of responsibility and
their under-developed sense of deservingness.

There may also be deep-seated resentment over thwarted ambitions,

aspirations, or desired achievements, arising from having “buried them
behind them” early on in life. They grew up in an excessive responsibility-
demanding family.

RIGHT UPPER BACK

“I’m doing it wrong.” The issue here is guilt over their methods of dealing
with life. They are in conflict about the manner in which they meet their
responsibilities and about how they express themselves. They were
constantly wrong-made as a child, and they ended up deeply concerned
about not doing things “right.”

MIDDLE UPPER BACK

“Weltschmerz.” They have pronounced a sense of universal responsibility

for everything, including themselves, and they feel a lot of pain over all that
is not right with the world.

Their experience is that it is somehow “all their fault” and that they are
responsible for World War II, and potentially for World War III. They were
held accountable for everything that went wrong in their family, in response
to their “better than the average bear’s” personal resources.

LEFT UPPER BACK

“I don’t deserve.” Here they are deeply concerned over the nature of their
needs, desires and ambitions. They feel they don’t have the right to these, or
they are guilty about their “failure to carry out their responsibilities”
because they have these needs, wants and desires. They feel they should be

145
“clear” of such “immoralities” or “impurities” or “impediments to their role
manifestations.”

They are in effect putting up a “protective shield” over their heart chakra
(intake point from behind the back for Cosmic love energy) as a
vulnerability-and “undeserved nurturance”-deflecting defense. It is the
result of numerous messages that they have no right to have needs when
they were a child.

BROKEN BACK

“Change it!” They are being given the message in no uncertain terms that
their take on life and their manner of dealing with things is not working any
more.

They were programmed to feel unsupported or competence-anxious, they

were undermined in their coping capability or in their ability to take life on
their own terms, or they were trained to operate in an accountability-
denying manner. (See SPINE PROBLEMS for information on the particular
vertebrae involved)

STABBING JABS OF PAIN IN THE BACK

“Tit for tat.” There are detrimental events that are going on “behind their
back,” along with nasty and nefarious thoughts and deeds on their part,
often as a result of the felt necessity for retribution. This is a pattern that
grew out of a mutual mayhem-exchanging hostile dysfunctional family.

BAD BREATH (Halitosis)

“Undigested experiences.” They are disturbed by “unfinished businesses,”

such as unexpressed feelings, thoughts and actions, as well as by unsettling
events on which they have not come to a satisfactory resolution. It results in
a real feeling of “putrid processes” in their system. This is an old, familiar
feeling for them, as their family was severely dysfunctional and
unreachable.

************************************

146
“Brack-mouth.” They have a lot of rageful resentment and hostile
ruminations about backed up experiences, and they are grudgefully hanging
onto the past. They engage in a considerable amount of bad-mouthing, vile
gossiping, negative evaluations, put-downs and disgusted
contemptuousness, and they are full of angry thoughts and revenge desires.
They are foul-mouthed and foul thinking, and they have a “rotten attitude.”
They engage in a lot of “brack-mouth” vulgar expressions. They are the
product of a similarly injustice-nurturing, nastily ruminating, and
recriminating family.

BAD TASTE IN THE MOUTH

“Here’s another fine mess I’ve gotten myself into!” They are faced with a
bad life situation created by ill-chosen circumstances, and they feel guilty
and angry about what they have wrought for themselves. It is an old,
familiar feeling, due to their family’s accusations, attributions and attacks as
a child.

BALANCE PROBLEMS

“Teetering.” They are suffering from severe disorientation and feelings of

being thrown off base. They have a strong sense of being at risk in a
confusing and potentially dangerous world. They don’t have a clear sense of
direction or of the nature of what is happening around them, they are
manifesting scattered thinking, and they are not at all centered. They are
sick and tired of all this and they aren’t willing to put up with demands for
more responsibility and accountability. They are the product of a “magical
misery tour” chaotic dysfunctional family where they were expected to be
the “sane one,” but where sanity was not attainable. (See ABASIA)

“BARBER’S ITCH” (Infection of the beard area)

“Masculinity-ambivalence.” The feeling is that all things considered, the

costs of being male out-weigh the benefits. It can come from a feeling of
being exploited, attacked, restricted and/or rejected, or even of being a
member of a group they don’t respect. Whatever the theme, the experience
is that being a male has been quite costly and even very unfortunate. It got

147
started with a strong ambivalence about his gender on his mother’s part
from the beginning.

BED-WETTING; “PEEING IN THEIR PANTS”

“In over their head.” They are feeling rejection and unworthiness, insecurity
and fear of the future. There is a sense of the inability to control their
situation and/or reactions. They have a great deal of anxiety concerning the
requirements of the world, as it was passed on and represented by their
father, usually. There is a lot of competence-anxiety, self-distrust and fear of
the Universe.

It is a father-phobia generated by a lack of compassion and understanding

on their father’s part, or as a function of the family and the surrounding
culture originally, and perhaps also in their current circumstances.

BEE STINGS (Bumble bee; honey bee; hornet; wasp; yellow jacket, etc.)

“How dare I?!” It is reflective of guilty self-attack for “having the nerve” to
step out on their own in the direction of self-manifestation, essence-
expression and/or destiny-development in violation of their intense “keep
them around the old homestead” programming. They experience it as a
“betrayal” and as a “destructive attack” on their family, at the subconscious
level. (See the body part(s) affected for more information)

TOXIC REACTION TO BEE STINGS

“Get back to where you once belonged!” They were systematically

exploited and deeply programmed to “never sit under the apple tree with
anyone else but me -- or else!” They are now “crossing the forbidden line,”
and they are being threatened with annihilation via the activation of the
self-destructive program in their head.

STUNG TO DEATH (e.g. killer bees or lethal allergic reaction)

“They went too far.” They were “past the point of no return” on their way to
their own self-planned destiny, and the “death implant” from their
extremely suppressive and possessive family went off.

148
 *************************************

“It was time.” They had re-evaluated their situation, given the massive
injunctions never to go their own path, and they in effect decided at the soul
level to “throw in the towel” and to “start over,” because the limitations on
their destiny were too great.

*************************************

“Shit happens.” In this situation, the “random generator” component of the

Universe has operated. A small percentage of events are indeed accidental -
- for purposes of constantly creating new situations for us to handle that is
the result of neither our will nor the Divine design. Incidentally, “shinola
happens” too.

BELCHING; BURPING

“Hurt-hits.” The present situation is activating fear, anxiety and catastrophic

expectations. There is a sense that there is not enough time, with a resulting
“gulping” of life too quickly. It comes from having lived in a dysfunctional
family in which they never knew when and where the next painful
experience was coming. They felt they had to be “always on their toes” to
try to deflect the next disaster.

“STUCK BURP” (Painfully progressing slowly up the esophagus against

the peristalsis)

“I’ve HAD it!” They are encountering a deep fear, despair and resentment
generated by the feeling that they are being once again asked to “do the
impossible with nothing.” It’s a combination of feeling “I can’t!” and “I
don’t want to!” and “I won’t!” -- with an associated fear of punishment and
rejection for this reaction. Underlying it is a devastated “childhood lost”
feeling in response to an “iron fist around their heart” reaction.

They early learned that flow, wonderment, and delight with being alive and
with themselves are not acceptable to the world, and that they had to “close
their heart” and to “shoulder the load.”

149
BELL’S PALSY (Facial paralysis)

“Super-suppressed.” They are manifesting an extreme control over their

anger and a total unwillingness to express their feelings, arising out of an
intense “run amok-anxiety” -- the fear of “losing it” and of ecological
calamity at their hands. They are intensely judgmental towards themselves,
with little tolerance or compassion being manifested. It is in response to an
underlying fulminating fury generated by a severely invasive and
oppressive family.

RIGHT FACE PARALYSIS

“Blank slate.” They refuse to let people know what they feel, for fear of the
environmental results.

LEFT FACE PARALYSIS

“Feeling-avoidance.” They have an inability to feel what they experience,

out of catastrophic expectations about what the feelings are, and out of what
the feelings represent about who they are.

“BELLY BUTTON” PROBLEMS

“Cut off from the Universe.” They feel somehow rejected by God. They
assume that they are getting their “Cosmic just desserts,” and this
conclusion is carried into their life as the foundational assumption out of
which they operate.

It got started in reaction to an at least ambivalent, if not a hostile womb

experience. It was a destiny design feature for purposes of karma-burning,
experience-expanding, and/or “special training” for an unusually
contributory destiny.

*************************************

“Potency issues.” They feel prevented from accessing and/or they are afraid
to access their personal power, community clout, and initiative impact-

150
making capabilities. It is the result of being reacted to as threatening and/or
evil when they did so as a child.

BELLY PROBLEMS

“I don’t dare try.” They are plagued by powerlessness feelings, and they
feel overwhelmed by life. There is an underlying fear of their gut reactions,
their intuitive hits, and their “inner voice.” They don’t trust their capacity to
make discriminations, evaluations and judgments.

Their feelings are easily hurt, and they are hypersensitive to rejection. They
are quite abandonment-anxious and betrayal-paranoid. They have lost touch
with much of their personal potency and life energy.

It comes from having been thoroughly undermined in their confidence and

self-trust by a wrong-making, denigrating, untrustworthy, rejecting,
abandonment-threatening, and rather severely dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Papa/Mama knows best!” They are imperatively intrusive in an

authoritarian manner. They are full of critical judgmentalness and
insensitive boorishness in a massively egocentric “What’s good for General
Bullmoose is good for EVERYBODY!” pattern. This comes from their
being positioned or capitulated into a situation of coercive control within
their patriarchal dysfunctional family.

RIGHT BELLY PROBLEMS

“I don’t fit in here.” They are experiencing difficulties in their relationship

with the world.

LEFT BELLY PROBLEMS

“Inner monsters.” They are having conflicts over their internal impulses.

“BENDS” (Nitrogen bubbles in the blood from deep diving)

151
“Erupting emergences.” They are overcome with subconscious material
“bubbling up” into consciousness. They have an intense unconscious need
to know what lies beneath the surface of things. They have plunged the
depths of their psyche (intentionally or unintentionally and with or without
awareness), and the result is an emergence of intense emotions and
experiences that they have kept repressed till now. It is more than they can
handle in their present state of development, and it therefore is abruptly
intruding on their manifestation and circumstances.

It is the result of a highly suppressive and repressive family in which there

was much “shoving into the sub-basement” of things that they were
unwilling to deal with.

BERYLLIUM POISONING

“What’s the use?” They are harboring deep grief and a sense of underlying
despair and demoralization. They have an unnerved resignation attitude in
the making or in their manifestation. They are overwhelmed by too much
sorrow, and by the “running on empty” effect of a severe inequality of
energy exchange with the world, whereby they put out much more than they
get back.

They have effectively given up on life, feeling that they have no ability to
determine or control anything. They feel that they are just simply
insufficient to the cause, and they can’t care any more. It is a result of
having carried the world on their shoulders all their life, starting with their
dysfunctional family, with little or no ability to receive or to request or to
require a return in kind. They were told in effect they were the source of all
the family’s problems while actually being the only one deflecting some of
the disasters.

BILE IN THE BLOOD (Liver secretion)

“Forget it!” They are strongly given to cynical pessimism and nihilism.
They are deeply disappointed, discouraged and disgusted, and they are
handicapped by an unbalanced reason that is dominated by negative internal
and external prejudices.

152
They are condescendingly contemptuous, and they have an intense
resentment over lack of recognition of who they are and what they
contribute. They manifest a notable lack of love, compassion and tolerance.
It derives from an intensely injustice-nurturing and nihilistic dysfunctional
family.

BIRD FLU (See AVIAN FLU)

BITES -- ANIMAL

“Self-assault.” They have a lot of anger that is turned inward in the form of
a felt need for punishment. They are open to every slight, and they are
afraid of attack from every quarter as a result. They also elicit attack and
betrayal from those around them. It is the outcome of a shame-inducing and
blame-throwing household. (See the part(s) of the body affected for more
information)

BITES -- HUMAN

“Violence-elicitation.” They have a pattern of “self-attacking,” leading to

being attacked by others. It is the result of systematic targeting for abuse
and denigration in their severely dysfunctional family. Ironically, they are
usually the most put-together person in the family -- and that is exactly
what elicits the projected self-hatred-induction from the family, and from
subsequent “standins.”

************************************

“Victim-tripping.” They are prone to “victim-tripping” attack-elicitation via

“wincing.” It is part of a “gamy” pattern in which they engage in constant
“moves” in a “soap opera” lifestyle involving continuous exchanges of
negative energy. It comes from a severely dysfunctional family that was full
of frustrated anger-release processes.

************************************

“Backfire.” They have a pattern of provoking as part of their “sneaky set up

artist” pattern of the “He hit me!” (“but I’m not telling how I got him to

153
make himself look like a moral cretin”) type. It derives from a “sado-
masochistic minuet” type of severely dysfunctional family in which the
(pseudo) “sadist” is the “well-guided missile” and the “masochist” is the
“masked sadist.” They are just “passing it on.”

************************************

“Black n’ blue Danube waltz.” They are a “chip on the shoulder” type who
ends up in numerous altercations with “cruising for a bruising” types,
sometimes resulting in bites. They were largely ignored until they hit the
“terrible two” period, when they discovered they could coerce attention and
control. They’ve been trapped in the pattern ever since. (See the part(s) of
the body affected for more information)

BITES -- INSECT

“Drives me up the wall.” They are “bugged” about small things and small
irritations. It can also reflect petty gossip being bandied about concerning
them. They have a sense of things constantly going awry, arising from a
rather chaotic dysfunctional family background. (See the part(s) of the body
affected for more information)

BITES -- SNAKE

“Father-phobia.” They are having difficulties dealing with their relations

with the world at large, with authority, and/or with their internal or external
father/yang principle. They are the product of a patriarchal and perhaps
authoritarian household, and they have never settled their issues with the
father. Or their father was absent, withdrawn/withholding or abusive. Or
their mother was very domineering and oppressive. (See the part(s) of the
body affected for more information)

BITES -- SPIDER

“Welcome to my parlor.” They are encountering “the enforcer” -- internal

programs that activate when they “cross the line” around self-manifestation
and destiny-commitment. It takes the form of their attracting detrimental
people, events and situations to themselves that have the effect of delaying,

154
distorting or derailing their self-commitment and self-development efforts.
And/or they are becoming ensnared in the machinations of the negative
feminine. Their mother was possessive, manipulative and/or subtly cruel.
(See the part(s) of the body affected for more information)

“BLACK EYE”

“Self-rejecting.” They are self-denigrating and hard, even harsh on

themselves, with an associated propensity to self-punishment and attack-
elicitation. They also feel at risk in the world, as a result of their inclination
to evoke self-endangering events. It is reflecting the insensitive, accusatory
and perhaps even hostile attitude their family had towards them.

*************************************

“What are you looking at!?” They have elicited a rage reaction from the
environment or a fear/guilt reaction from themselves for seeing too much.
They are the product of a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional family
who systematically punished and/or suppressed them when they threatened
to do the “Emperor’s New Clothes” response.

RIGHT “BLACK EYE”

“I’m sorry.” They have guilt/shame for what they see happening in the
environment around them, feeling that they are somehow responsible for it.

LEFT “BLACK EYE”

“Atonement.” They have to make up for what they are, in reaction to self-
observation based self-rejection.

BLACKHEADS

“Skid Row Syd.” They feel dirty and unloved. They are self-disapproving,
and they are feeling unlovable and “unfit for human consumption.” It stems
from a shame-inducing and rejecting family.

**************************************

155
“Mini-eruptions.” They are prone to small outbursts of anger. They are
quite resentful over their life history and situation, and they are having
difficulty keeping that under control. They are the product of a severely
dysfunctional and frustrating family environment.

BLACKING OUT (Sudden collapse, with unseeing open eyes and

paralysis, but with full awareness of what is happening around them)

“Fall apart.” They have a deep fear that they can’t cope and they are feeling
overwhelmed, and they operate out of a lot of catastrophic expectations.
They have the conviction that they don’t have the potency, strength, skills,
knowledge and other resources to make it in life. They are blocking out
threatening situations by blacking out. There was a great deal of
confidence-undermining from their family.

***************************************

“Dissociative.” They are subject to disturbed or altered integrative functions

of identity, memory or consciousness, such as vague answering, partial
multiple personality, trance states, de-realization, brainwashing/torture
effects, “blackouts,” etc.

It is the result of overwhelm or overload, due to impaired resources or

extraordinary circumstances, or both. Their effort is to “try to pull some
coals from the fire,” to at least try to meet some of the needs of reality in
their undermined and partially disengaged condition.

It is the outcome of having been “in over their head” because too much was
expected or required of them when they were a child. They tried to rise to
the demands of the people and situations involved in their dysfunctional
family, and it was too much for them.

***************************************

“Not ME!” They are prone to responsibility and accountability-avoidance,

arising from an over-indulgent, sexualizing and highly enmeshed intensely
denial-dominated family. They were also systematically sex-ploitated and in
effect turned into the “spouse” of their parent.

156
BLADDER PROBLEMS

“Down-loading time.” There is a need to get rid of something in their life --

they are desperately trying to clear the toxic things, situations and people
out of their life. They feel the necessity for the release of pressure.
However, their lack of self-love makes this a quite difficult undertaking.
They came up in a rigidly domineering family who allowed them little
room for self-manifestation or relief from their suppressive restrictions.

***************************************

“I can’t expect any better.” They have a fair amount of guilt and grief
arising from a severely suppressive and non-supportive childhood. It led to
suppressed resentment over vulnerability and abandonment-anticipation.
They feel tired and that they are “running on empty,” and there is poor
endurance and a considerable amount of inner agitation and irritation. Their
family intended to “keep them around the old homestead” as their “private
preserve” and their “whipping kid.”

***************************************

“I don’t dare.” There is a certain lack of inner direction arising from the fear
that if they have any hopes, they will prove to be false and blow up in their
face. They have a fearful orientation towards the world, along with a
cautiously conservative approach which results in their hanging on to old
ideas and being afraid of letting go. They are lacking in adaptability, and
they have a fear of change, with the result that they are prone to depression.

They have the feeling that their need for love is unfulfilled and unfulfillable,
and they have a strong underlying abandonment-anxiety, with a resulting
tendency to dependent attachment and to vulnerability-avoidance.

It is a pattern that got started in rigidly denial-dominated and bitter

dysfunctional family who would systematically see to it that anything they
got would be destroyed or removed, out of a generalized envy and alarm
reaction to the individual’s (to them) incomprehensible capabilities and
potentialities.

157
 *************************************

“Deeply unhappy.” There is very little basic trust that things are going to go
well for them, and they are just miserable about that. They have a lack of
self-confidence, and they feel insufficient and cope-ability-anxious. They
are deeply survival-anxious in all arenas, and they have a great need for
order and predictability in their life. They come from an alarmingly and
implacably dysfunctional family who were themselves quite fearful of life.

*************************************

“Piss off!” They are thoroughly resentful about their life, and they are
looking for who is responsible for it. They are intensely angry and blame-
throwing, and they feel betrayed and victimized. Much of their venom is
directed to their intimates, especially those of the other gender. They feel
the parent of the other gender is the cause of all their problems.

They have significant problems in the sexual arena, including suppression

of their sexual identity and repression of their sexuality. Underneath all this
is the uneasy feeling they are really getting their “just desserts.” This whole
pattern came about as a result of their being sexualized and sex-ploitated in
a seductive-destructive “tantalizing tarantula” -- “seduce-slap” guilt-
inducing and accusatory manner in the context of a severely dysfunctional
family.

CYSTITIS; INFLAMMATION OF THE BLADDER

“Chronically pissed off.” They are perennially angry at the world, and
everything sets them off. They are intensely irritable, and they impose their
negative take on everyone and everything. They are in effect addicted to
being unhappy and to negativity. They are the product of a seethingly
resentful injustice-nurturing family system.

BLANCHING

“Freak-bleach.” They are prone to sudden fear episodes arising from the
approach of what are to them unstoppable disasters. It is a pattern learned in

158
a severely dysfunctional family, where they developed an intense learned
helplessness, at least in some situations.

*************************************

“Losing it.” They have rushes of overwhelming rage and readiness to

engage in direct combat. It is the result of having come up in an emotionally
explosive dysfunctional family.

BLAND TASTE PREFERENCES

“Bland on bland.” They are intensity-avoidant, self-suppressing, and

predictability-addicted. They have a rather pronounced fear of the unknown
and the unexpectable. It arises from an annihilation anxiety-inducing
childhood in their dysfunctional family, in which things got so out of hand
that they were often death-threatened in one way or another.

BLEEDING

“Seething leakage.” They have a lot of undirected anger that is draining out
the joy of life. They seem to be in an angry Universe full of nasty people
who are inflicting losses and putting them in danger. They feel singled out
for singularly unpleasant experiences by the indifferent vagaries of the
Universe.

It comes from having experienced a lot of “They’re so good with their

stiletto, you don’t even mind the pain” treatment in their childhood. In other
words, they were surrounded by people who were intensely angry and slyly
effective with subtle and indirect passive-aggressive behaviors for which
there was no recourse.

BLEEDING GUMS (See GUM PROBLEMS)

BLINDNESS

“Martian anthropologist.” Their essence chose to have the experience of

being a “sidelines participant-observer” for this lifetime. They wanted to

159
both learn from this experience, to teach from the wisdom this life
experience generates, and to share the wisdom that they brought with them.

***************************************

“I can’t deal with this!” There is an inability to handle all the realities of
their situation. They are in effect overwhelmed, demoralized or terrified by
what they experience happening around and within them. So they have had
to “turn away from it all” to “keep on trucking.” It is the product of a
severely dysfunctional and destructive family system and/or family
circumstances.

RIGHT EYE BLINDNESS

“Ostrich.” They are “tuning out” what is happening in the world around
them, due to its being too much to handle.

LEFT EYE BLINDNESS

“Self-revulsion.” They are suffering from severe self-rejection arising from

massive messaging to the effect that they are a “sight to make eyes sore”
from their family and/or from their mother in the womb.

BLINKING RAPIDLY

“Flinch-wincing.” The present situation is generating an “out of control”

experience and some “dangerous environment” feelings. There is confusion
and an inability to see things clearly in a sub-assertive and awareness-
avoidant individual. They received an intense “Don’t see!” injunction when
they were growing up in a denial-dominated dysfunctional and oppressive
family.

BLISTERS

“Hunkering in the bunker.” They are resisting the flow of life, because the
present situation feels like there is no emotional protection available to
them. They feel forced to withhold expression and/or there is a great deal of
tension associated with expressing themselves.

160
They feel unsafe in the world, and they are digging in their heels in a self-
protective resistive mode. They have been sitting on an intense mental
irritation that has now shown up as an emotional eruption indication. There
was never any emotional buffering from the difficulties generated by their
super-suppressive dysfunctional family.

BLISTERS ON THE FEET

“Agitated aggravation.” There are intense mental and/or emotional conflicts

that are “rubbing them the wrong way” that they are trying to ignore. This
pattern got started in their dysfunctional family in which problem-solving
attempts only made matters worse.

BLISTERS ON THE RIGHT FOOT

“Where do I turn?” They are concerned about how to go about getting

support from the environment regarding their conflicted situation.

BLISTERS ON THE LEFT FOOT

“But not for me.” They feel that they don’t deserve much support from the
environment.

BLISTERS ON THE HEELS

“Emotional starvation.” They are having maternal deprivation and/or

devastation issues. They feel unsupported and even handicapped by the
realities of their situation as a result of their early experiential history.

BLISTERS ON THE RIGHT HEEL

“Driving them away.” They tend to be rather deprivation-eliciting in their

social style.

BLISTERS ON THE LEFT HEEL

“Self-disgust.” They feel like they are “unfit for human consumption.”

BLISTERS ON THE HANDS

161
“I’m doing it again!” They are experiencing irritation and frustration with
what they are doing and how they are handling their life.

BLISTERS ON THE RIGHT HAND

“Phony baloney.” They feel like a fraud, and like they are somehow
unequipped to handle things.

BLISTERS ON THE LEFT HAND

“Run amok-anxiety.” They feel like they are somehow untrustworthy in

their motivations, resulting in self-distrust and felt powerlessness.

“BLOATED” (Abdominal distention)

“Creature from the Black Lagoon.” Something in their current situation is

generating a gripping fear and as yet undigested ideas, along with a sense of
responsibility-overload and the associated resentment.

There is a considerable amount of anxiety and agitated anticipation of

aggravating developments. They are implication-catastrophizing and
generalized dread, and there are vague and intangible fears about things that
“go bump in the night,” the nameless terrors of which they dare not speak.
It came from a “magical misery tour” family experience in which they
could never tell when and what piece of excrement would come off the wall
at them just that it would.

“BLOATED” (Body-wide water-retention)

“Holding on.” They are not letting go of something or someone, out of

resistance to changes. They are hanging on to the past for fear that if they
let go, something awful will happen.

They feel like they are carrying a heavy load on their shoulders, an overload
of responsibility. They want to share the load, but they are afraid to ask for
fear of alienating and losing what support they do have.

It’s a “Cinderella” pattern in which they were held accountable and

responsible for the needs and situations of everyone and everything in their

162
family. Their only support came from just that “unsung hero(ine)” role, in a
“serve-aholic” situation.

They are therefore desperate for love and afraid of the loss of love, with an
associated intense underlying chronic grief. (Water retention is stored grief
from this whole situation and life history.)

It comes from a fear that any change will result in the loss of even more in
their life.

They’d rather keep things as they are than take a chance they will end up
with nothing, which is what they fully expect is their “just desserts” for all
the “failures” of their care-taking represented by the negative events in their
family’s history.

“BLOOD BLISTER” (Blood is clotted under the skin, due to a severe

pinch)

“Under siege.” They have the experience that the world is out to get them in
some way of late. They were often subjected to systematic subtle or not-so-
subtle attack as a child. (See the body part(s) involved for more
information)

BLOOD CLOTS

“Pulling the world in over their heads.” They have an intensely

conservative and restrictive reaction to life. They are resisting change and
expansion, closing down on the flow of joy and growth in their life. Change
usually meant things got considerably worse when they were a child, and
their subsequent experience has done little to change that impression.

*************************************

“Love retard.” There is a blocking off of self-love, the ability to express

love to others, and the capacity to receive love. They are feeling neglected,
abandoned and/or unacceptable, due to the lack or loss of love in their life.
They cling to or to hold on to love for fear of its moving away. It is the
result of an emotionally depriving early environment.

163
BLOOD POISONING

“Dark shadow.” They have an intense negativity in their mind in the form
of rage, conflict, resistance and fear. It results in abuse of the body by
neglect, carelessness and/or dissipatingly self-destructive self-indulgence. It
arose from an enragingly dysfunctional family that engendered a strong
self-rejection and a nihilistic resignation about ever being able to do
anything worthwhile with their life.

BLOOD PRESSURE -- HIGH

“Look out!” They have a feeling of being threatened in some vague but
very important high stakes manner, with a resulting intense sense of
endangerment. They feel ready for virtually anything to happen. There is
stress and conflict, shocks and tension in their situation. It is the result of a
long-standing emotional problem that hasn’t been worked out, a deep
resentment over the past that is eating at them. They come from an
unpredictably violating dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Going down.” They are severely depressed and demoralized, and they are
giving up on life. They feel powerless regarding their situation and with
respect to their coping capability, and they feel that their situation is
hopeless, with the result that they are “throwing in the towel.” They are the
product of a devastatingly dysfunctional family who undermined all
possible out routes.

*************************************

“Seething rage.” They are intensely angry and resentful about just
everything. They have a great deal of suppressed rage and hostility over the
felt external control of their lives. They are afraid of their anger, and they
feel that they can’t handle it, so they stuff it. They suppress their negative
emotions with intimates for fear of hurting their loved ones.

They tend to be over-compliant and anger-avoidant to mask their intense

feelings of betrayal-rage. They are bitterly negative about everyone and

164
everything, and they always have been. They are a seething volcano who
“makes mountains out of molehills.” They grew up in a hostile and severely
dysfunctional patriarchal family.

*************************************

“Sealed unit.” They are hyper-self-responsible, and they feel that they can’t
count on anyone or anything. They feel they have to do it all themselves.
They have an abiding inability to relax, they tend to overeat and to be over-
weight. Their love nature is unresolved and reserved for only a few. They
won’t allow themselves to feel love, affection or compassion for many, and
they operate with highly conditional love habits.

They have never had a childhood, and they were never given the message
that who they are is enough, and that what they accomplished filled the bill.
They were effectively “abandoned at an early age” and left more or less to
their own devices throughout their childhood, resulting in an “island unto
themselves” self-made person.

*************************************

“Perfection-expecting.” They have a profoundly frightening dread of failure

that was produced by their parents making them into an “ego extension” --
“vicarious accomplisher” for them. They are tremendously parent-admiring,
especially of their father, and they are an “achieve-aholic” hard-driving
competitor for paternal validation. They are a “work-aholic” -- “number-
addict” and “coup-seeker” who wants to “make a killing,” and they are
perfectionistically disappointed in themselves.

*************************************

“This is MY show!” They won’t accept help or delegate responsibility, and

they are an aggressive dominator, with a deep need to be in control, arising
from an underlying dependent passivity and fear of domination. They have
an underlying deep distrust of the universe, and they feel that they have to
personally determine everything, lest all hell break loose. They were the
“sane one” in their severely dysfunctional and patriarchal family.

165
 *************************************

“I’m all I’ve got, and one strike and I’m out!” They are spirituality-
denigrating and love-suppressing, and at base they are shy, with a poor sex
adjustment, as they seek satisfaction within themselves only. They are
anxious about money, they are time-urgent, they are insecure about life, and
they are stress-sensitive. They are impatient, angry, and wanting to live life
in the moment, as they try to pound away too quickly at life. All of which
arises from their having had to take on their parent(s) ambitions for them
from far too early an age.

BLOOD PRESSURE -- LOW

“Eeyore.” They are experiencing a “What’s the use? It won’t work anyway”
demoralized defeatism resulting in a giving up on life and in a “settle-for”
lifestyle. They tend to get into doing a sacrificial pattern, followed by
unconscious deep-seated resentment. There is a feeling of purposelessness,
along with a letting go of a sense of meaningfulness, both of which reflect a
subconscious death wish. There is a good deal of anxiety, insecurity and
frustration that have led to their becoming nihilistic. They have withdrawn
their energy from the process of living.

It all got started in a family who operated in the same manner and
simultaneously demanded that they be the “pillar of strength,” and the one
who tries to keep things together and cleans up the mess. Theirs was a
loveless and joyless family experience. At the same time, their family was
completely unable to give them any love or hope as all this was going on.
The individual ended up feeling that there’s really no point and no winning
in this business of life, and so they are marking time and “waiting for rigor
mortis” as they experience the feeling, “There must be some way out of
here.”

BLOOD PROBLEMS

“Going down.” They are severely depressed and demoralized, and they are
giving up on life. They feel powerless regarding their situation and with
respect to their coping capability. They feel that their situation is hopeless,

166
and they are “throwing in the towel.” They are the product of a
devastatingly dysfunctional family who undermined all possible out routes.

*************************************

“Seething rage.” They are intensely angry and resentful about just
everything. They have a great deal of suppressed rage and hostility over the
felt external control of their life. They are afraid of their anger, and they feel
that they can’t handle it, so they stuff it.

They suppress their negative emotions with intimates for fear of hurting
their loved ones. They tend to be over-compliant and anger-avoidant to
mask their intense feelings of betrayal-rage.

They are a seething volcano who “makes mountains out of molehills.” They
are bitterly negative about everyone and everything, and they always have
been, and there are deep-seated thoughts and feelings of unwillingness to go
on with life. They grew up in a hostile and severely dysfunctional
patriarchal family.

*************************************

“Investment-avoidant.” Their “emotional body” is deeply troubled, and

there is a real lack of joy. There is no circulation of new ideas, information
and possibilities. There is also an absence of love in their heart. They have
difficulties in how well they are taking care of their own needs and getting
nurtured. There is also a diminution of life energy and little vitality-
replenishment, and their thinking is redundant, repetitious, stagnant and
going nowhere.

They have intensely negative feelings about themselves arising from a

profound buried guilt over a felt impeding of someone else’s life, an
existential guilt about “being a burden.” They have a rigid, somber and
disaster-deflecting orientation that got started in a severely dysfunctional
and ferociously closed-mindedly denigrating family in which nothing ever
worked, and in which they were held accountable for everyone’s misery.
There was no room for their having any needs of their own or for any form
of hope or joy.

167
PLATELETS, LOW (Difficulty clotting blood)

“Over-responsibility.” They have a sense that they are here to make the
world all better, and that they should care-take everything and everyone. It
comes from having grown up in a situation of many unmet needs for
everyone, and they rose to the challenge to the point where they have some
difficulty limiting demands made on them or in taking care of their own
needs.

“BLOODSHOT EYES” (See EYE PROBLEMS)

BLURRED VISION

“I don’t want to see that.” Their version of reality is not meshing with the
realities that confront them. They have a real difficulty with focusing, with
being clear, and with accepting what they see. They don’t want to accept
what their eyes are telling them. They are the product of a demoralizingly
dysfunctional and denial-dominated family.

BODY ODOR (“B.O.”)

“Rejection-phobia.” They are quite alarmed about the business of making it

in life, in particular with regard to social acceptance. They have a lot of fear
of what others will do to, towards and regarding them, and they are full of
ostracism-paranoia. They were the “ejectee/rejectee/dejectee” in their
enmeshed and dysfunctional family, who systematically programmed them
to be rejection-eliciting.

*************************************

“Self-rejection.” They feel that they are “unfit for human consumption,”
that they don’t “measure up,” that they “don’t have what it takes.” It comes
from a denigrating and wrong-making family.

BOILS

“Roiling turmoil.” They are having problems with deprivation-resentment,

along with a seething fury. They are “boiling over” with anger at their

168
whole situation. It also represents a feeling of being betrayed and
sabotaged. They were denied love and joy as a child, they deeply resent it.

This can come from:

1) an indeed depriving and undermining family,

2) an imperious expectations-generating capitulating family, and/or

3) a current situation in which they are in fact being frustrated, deprived and
harmed.

(See CARBUNCLE and/or the part(s) of the body affected for more
information)

BONE PROBLEMS

“Vulnerability-anxiety.” They are having real problems with mental or

emotional feelings of weakness and defenselessness. They feel that they are
not strong enough to meet the requirements of life, and that they are unable
to protect themselves. They grew up in an aggressive, self-immersed and
uncaring family who rode rough-shod over them.

*************************************

“I ain’t enough.” They had and have a tremendous sense of accountability

and responsibility for the state of their ecology, along with a simultaneous
feeling of “faking it to make it,” of being a “fraud,” and of “being in way
over their head” -- like they were when they were a child.

They feel that they are the only one who can even try to pull anything out of
the fire, but they don’t know if they have the strength or firmness to pull it
off. They feel very much alone on their own, inadequate to the cause, and
deserving of the negative outcomes that they generate for themselves. They
grew up in a demoralizingly dysfunctional family in which they were the
“sane one,” but in which they had little or no power, and in which they were
blamed for all that went wrong.

169
They were placed in a parental role from a very early age in their dependent
and enmeshed family. On top of which, they were also feeling endangered,
because they were indeed potentially in great trouble, due to being required
to do far more than a child should and could do.

*************************************

“Moral cretins.” They feel a real lack of the fulfillment of their standards
and norms in their life. Their experience is that they are surrounded by fools
and “moral monsters” that could care less about values, ecological impact
and standards. They also feel no sense of support or commitment from the
universe in this matter. They are the product of a highly morally oriented
family who expected perfection of them. It is probable that this is a multi-
life issue for them.

*************************************

“Losing it.” Life’s vicissitudes and difficulties have undermined or

overwhelmed the depths of their sense of sanity. They have the feeling that
they are losing their mind, and they have severe doubts about their ability to
handle the situation. They come from a crazy-making and confusion-
inducing family.

*************************************

“No support.” There is a strong experience of a lack of validation and

assistance from their loved ones -- a feeling that they are out on a limb with
no back-up. Indeed, they have the impression that they are actually being
actively undermined and invalidated by those close to them. It is an old,
familiar experience for them, in that their family consistently denigrated
and disrespected them as a child.

*************************************

“Mr./Ms. Nobody.” They feel a real loss of standing in the world, and there
is deeply hurt pride in them. They feel under-rated, invisible, unappreciated
and exploited. They are very angry about this, and it gives them the
pronounced sense that the Universe is unjust and indifferent. It all got

170
started in their family, where they were dealt with in this manner. (See the
particular bones involved for more information)

BONE MARROW PROBLEMS

“Cope-ability problems.” They have a deep sense of being insufficient to

the cause of living life, of being unable to support and care for themselves.
They feel that they are in way over their head and thoroughly unsafe in an
uncaring and overwhelming Universe. It arose from being thrown into self-
care at a very early age, due to familial overwhelm and/or dysfunctionality.
(See the bone(s) involved for more information)

BONES – BROKEN, FRACTURED

“Sharp break.” There has been an abrupt shattering of the foundations of

their life and in the structure of their Universe -- significant losses or great
failures in their life. They are experiencing profound inner conflict in the
depths of their being.

They are reacting to experiences that run contrary to their deepest beliefs --
moral, spiritual, ethical, social and/or scientific/pragmatic -- as in a
“paradigm problem.”

There is a definite break from the past, along with an accompanying desire
to quickly change circumstances to compensate for their dissatisfaction with
their personality and/or with their situation.

********************************

“There must be some way outta this!” They are desperately needing a
radical change in their circumstances, and in a way, it is a cry for help, a
giving in to the need for assistance, and/or a dire necessity for a significant
change in direction. They are too rigid or frightened to acknowledge this
need.

They have an underlying feeling that they aren’t allowed to be their own
authority, and there is even a sense that authority figures are doing their

171
thinking for them. They are apt to have had a strict and authoritarian
upbringing, with a resulting resentment of and rebellion against authority.

********************************

“Here it comes!” There is a fair amount of fear and/or a belief in violence

happening to them. They are the product of at least a “flying emotional
bodies” and perhaps a literal “flying bodies” type of virulent and violent
dysfunctional family. (See “BRITTLE BONE” SYNDROME; OSTEO-
MYELITIS; OSTEOPOROSIS; PAGET’S DISEASE) [See the bone(s)
involved for more information]

BONES, DISLOCATED

“Tilt!” They have a deep sense of out-of-jointness with their world or

between their inner world and their outer realities. They have lost their
place in the world and their direction. They have a deep sense of imbalance,
of confused purpose.

It can reflect major internal and/or external changes of circumstance and/or

a lifelong pattern of being out of synch with their environment or
themselves that got started with their not fitting in to their family system
from the very beginning.

BOTULISM (The most dangerous form of bacterial food poisoning)

“Sitting duck.” They are feeling defenseless, and like they have to allow
others to take control and run their situation. It is a learned helplessness
reaction and a feeling that they don’t have the right to protection, support or
nurturance. They simply expect to “eat shit” as a part of living. It is a
pattern that arose in a family where they had few, if any rights, and in which
much anger and negativity took place over which no one seemed to have
control.

BOWEL MOVEMENT QUALITIES

“What color is your pair-of-shits’?” The “hue of your doo” is reflective of

what is happening for you at the moment.

172
Here are some examples:

BLACK TARRY (Due to dried blood in their bowels)

“World destruction fantasies.” The feeling is that they would like to

terminate the whole human scene. It was generated by a severely disabling
and confusion-inducing “smiling hatred” mothering and subsequent “crazy-
making.”

DARK BROWN

“Seething volcano.” They are undergoing a severely suppressed intense

anger that is being reactivated or brought to awareness by current
circumstances, which in some way recreate the consistent passive-
aggressive subtle cruelty that was their life as a child.

DARK GREEN

“Swamp thing.” They are experiencing a “stagnation of their situation,” and

they are “lost in the muck and mire.” It is a combination of grief, guilt and
anger. Something in the current situation is raising this issue and
representing the experience of being rejected by the Universe. It reflects
severe self-rejection issues coming up that are very old, and which reflect
maternal non-availability in infancy.

GREY-GREEN

“What’s the use?” They are experiencing resentful resignation and despair,
giving up, and a feeling that nothing is going to work. It arises from a rather
severely dysfunctional family, and the present circumstances are re-
activating that old familiar feeling.

REDDISH BROWN

“Raging in the rain.” They are experiencing rejection-resentment and

“drain-pain.” It is a blend of grief and anger that is the result of being
simultaneously exploited and “blame-framed” as a child. Something is
currently happening which is bringing up that old, familiar theme.

173
TAN

“Ghostly presence.” They are afraid to “let fly with themselves,” in terms of

the ecological effect and reaction they might get. They are self-distrusting,
self-suppressing and/or self-impeding as a result. They are in effect holding
themselves back at the deep level, to prevent what they fear would be
disaster. They were told over and over in childhood that they might cause
World War III with their self-manifestation.

YELLOW

“Crapping their pants.” They are experiencing “annihilation-anxiety” like

that which occurred when they were a helpless infant in a dysfunctional
family. Something irrational is happening in their life which recreates that
sense of being traumatized within an inch of their life.

YELLOW-GREEN

“Desert island.” The feeling is that they are being abandoned -- again. It is a
mixture of fear and grief, and it reflects intensely conditional love from
their family.

“BROKEN-HEARTED”

“Sat an hour… and only farted.” They are encountering “false alarms”
reflecting and re-activating their generalized dread. They have vague and
intangible fears about “things that go bump in the night.”

They grew up in a “magical misery tour” severely dysfunctional family in

which much subterranean and subconscious negativity and attack occurred,
and in which they could never tell what was going on or what was coming
down.

“CORK – POP” (Solid “plug” followed by fluid flow)

“Out of control!” They are feeling that they are going to “lose it” and “run
amok.” It is fear of their anger of either a chronic and/or current nature.

174
They are the product of fuminatingly frustrating passive-aggressive
dysfunctional family in which they were often the victim.

“DIAPER DIARRHEA” (Light yellow fluid flow)

“Scared shitless.” They are re-experiencing the “annihilation-anxiety” they

first encountered in infancy. It is being reactivated now by their current
circumstances.

“GREASY KID STUFF”

“Losing it.” They are digesting fat from their body, either in response to a
diet and/or to not needing the “protective padding” any more. They are the
product of an emotionally abusive dysfunctional family who were very
hurtful towards them.

“LUMP CLUMPS” (“Blueberries”)

“Rage turds.” They are holding themselves back in a resentment reaction to

what is going down. They grew up feeling helpless to do anything about the
dysfunctional things that kept happening in their family.

“MORGUE FUGUE”

“Exhume fumes” or “Who died in here?” They are experiencing rejection-

paranoia -- the expectation that they are going to be attacked and expelled
and they usually are. It comes from a massively rejecting and alienation-
inducing style-generating hostile yet possessive family.

“SINKER STINKERS”

“Heavy shit.” They are processing very intense and dense deep-seated
emotion. They are the product of a rejecting and dysfunctional family.

“SLUSH-MUSH”

“Freak out.” They are having an intense fear reaction to alarming

developments in their life at this time. It is a situational response, though it
almost invariably carries reminders of “ghosts of Christmases past.”

175
BOWEL PROBLEMS

“No dumping.” They have a fear of letting go of the past, the old and no
longer needed -- the waste products their learning history. They have a rigid
and intensely conservative, cautious and controlling approach to life, in
which they are deeply afraid to let go of the “tried and true” to take on the
new and renewing. It is the result of an intensely entrenched and past-
fixated family.

*************************************

“Jealous possessiveness.” They are deathly afraid of losing their intimates,

and they are in effect horrified at the prospect of finding themselves
homeless with no resources. They are madly restricting of their intimates as
a result. At the same time, they are terrified of alienating their loved ones,
and they bend over backwards to please them. They were threatened with
abandonment and told that they are “unfit for human consumption” by their
mother.

*************************************

“Control freak.” They are hell bent for leather to stay in control of every
situation they encounter. They are totally resistant to any form of delegation
or release of the throttle in any situation. They have the experience that at
base they can’t control their situation, so they are frantic/fanatic to try to
control something or someone. They are the product of an out-of-control
dysfunctional family, in which they tried desperately to impose some sort of
sanity on the scene. (See COLON PROBLEMS; LARGE INTESTINE
PROBLEMS; SMALL INTESTINE PROBLEMS)

“CRAPPING IN THEIR PANTS” (OR IN THEIR BED)

“Withholding.” They are engaged in a great deal of resentfulness and

“holding out.” They are into angry rebelliousness and revenge-seeking.
They are intensely controlling and control-avoidant. They are now grimly
determined to have their way, come what may. It is an emotional overflow,
after years of controlling their emotions.

176
They were subjected to an intensely controlling and authoritarian value
system, while a subpart of the system, usually the mother is, over-indulgent,
interference-running or rebellious herself. They allied with this person
against the dominant authoritarianism, and they became authoritarianly
anti-authority as a result.

*************************************

“Throwing in the towel.” They have in effect become blown out in their
emotions. They feel that they just can’t carry off self-control and self-
regulation in the realm of feelings and meanings. They are too tired of the
conflicts and confrontations, and they are now spewing their emotions in an
outpouring of ecologically destructive outbursts. They come from an over-
controlling and suppressive dysfunctional family. (See DIARRHEA;
SPASTIC COLON; “THE TROTS”)

“BRAIN FOG” (Clouded thinking, memory problems, confusion,

disorientation, fatigue, etc.)

“Self-worth issues.” They are experiencing excessive guilt, self-doubt and

self-image problems. They feel unappreciated, and they are also unsure of
their capability and value. They need appreciation, love, and understanding
of the kind they never got as a child in their accusatorially invalidating
family.

*************************************

“Assimilation problems.” They are having absorption difficulties and

problems in separating the wheat from the chaff, so to speak. They are
having problems with analysis and with processing things. They are being
hampered by distorted discrimination and disturbing distrust generated by a
dysfunctional family’s “magical mystery tour” pattern, and by their being
subjected to systematic invalidation then and ever since.

*************************************

“What am I doing here!” They are manifesting a dismayed

discombobulation about the world and the way their life is going. It is the

177
result of growing up in a vaguely overwhelmed family, of being the product
of a severely enmeshed and incompetencing family, or of being a “visitor”
from another soul pool who came here to learn and/or teach.

BRAIN PROBLEMS

“In over their head.” They are feeling drained and over-demanded, like they
are being abandoned by the “Home Office.” There are serious conflicts
between their personal goals and the Divine intent, and they are very
worried and anxious as a result. It is a “God is Al Capone” relational issue
with the “Source.”

They have the feeling that the “Home Office” has taken the helm of their
life against their will and desires, and that they are unable to manage their
life. They have a great deal of anxiety and nervousness as a result.

As a result, there is now a major difficulty with their “bio-computer” and

“communication center” in either the belief systems or the “Executive
Officer” or both. There is a profound inner conflict within the operational
ego and/or between the desires and intentions of the personality and their
perception of their unfolding destiny.

This developed as a result of a family history in which a lot didn’t make

sense, and yet it was justified as being “God’s Will” or the equivalent. They
are the product of a significantly dysfunctional family who did not respond
to their needs or in which they were forced to take over the meeting of their
own needs because no one else would. As a result, they developed an
abiding distrust of the Universe.

RIGHT HEMISPHERE (Perceptual, spatial and holographic processing)

“No comprehension.” They have handicaps in the handling of perceptual

integration, emotional/experiential processing, and intuitive functioning.
They were not supposed to “get” what was going on in their severely
dysfunctional family.

LEFT HEMISPHERE (Conceptual, logical and verbal processing)

178
“Irrational.” They are suffering from a befuddlement of the ability to
conceptualize, to interpret, and to apply logical analysis. They got a strong
“Don’t think!” injunction.

CORPUS CALLOSUM (Rich highway of fibers connecting the

hemispheres)

“I went thata way” (pointing in two opposite directions). There is a

disruption of their action-integration, of their programming, and of the
initiation of strategies. They were impeded in their development of the
ability to take initiative action.

FRONTAL LOBE (Behind the forehead – the interpreter and decision-

maker)

“Can’t make sense of things.” They are having difficulties in the integration
and interpretation of information that are disrupting the decision-making
process. It is the result of confusion-inducing parenting.

TEMPORAL LOBE (The temples -- auditory and information-processing

center)

“Disc failure.” There are disruptions of their ability to accept, organize and
store information, along with problems in the verbal encoding and
processing of experiences. They were subjected to very rigid restrictions on
what was and what was not acceptable.

RIGHT TEMPORAL LOBE

“World-confusion.” They are having difficulties processing environmental

events.

LEFT TEMPORAL LOBE

“Self-chaos.” They are encountering problems dealing with the qualities of

their personal situation.

OCCIPITAL LOBE (Back of the head – the visual projection center)

179
“Can’t see it.” They are being hampered by distortions and derailments of
their ability to organize visual inputs and to form images. They were given
a strong “Don’t see!” injunction.

CEREBELLUM (Motor control center)

“Action disruption.” There has been a derailment of their ability to

coordinate and carry out intentions and actions. They were systematically
incompetenced as a child.

MID-BRAIN (Emotional manifestation system)

“Meaning confusion.” They are having difficulties in the management of

their feelings and in the process of evaluation and application of decision
criteria. They were not supposed to arrive at their own conclusions, and
they were programmed to be emotional-commotional and/or emotionally
illiterate as a child.

There are four major structures in the mid-brain that handle the meanings of
things:

The first is the hippocampus, located at the back end of the corpus
callosum. It is sort of crescent-curved and ends out in a form like the paw of
an animal such as a cat.

Its function is continuity and coherence, in the sense of sequence of events,

memory of things, the experience of one’s self, the sense of time, history,
tradition and how everything fits together, etc. It is the understanding
function, so to speak.

When things break down here, the result is a lost in the moment non-
comprehension of what things signify and where everything fits into the
scheme of how everything works and what it all means.

The second major structure is the thalamus, which is a lemon-sized cluster

of nuclei located in the center of the brain. It processes almost all
information prior to its entrance into the cerebral cortex.

180
It screens out stuff via repression, and it prepares the cortex to receive the
information via activation of the cortex. It is essentially the “control center
for consciousness.” Things like, “I am aware. . .”

Trouble here results in their functioning in a “brain-dead” manner --

operating without awareness on “automatic pilot,” systematically screwing
up due to lack of tracking or comprehension, “lost in space,” etc.

The third significant structure here is the hypothalamus, which is a dime-

sized thing located at the base of the mid-brain underneath the thalamus. It
handles emotional responses, sexuality, stress-management, and a number
of other things related to the emotional system.

It orchestrates and activates the cortex via the meaning implications,

indications and interventions that are involved in the significations of
things. “I feel. . .” is the generic reaction occurring here.

Trouble here takes the form of deranged, demoralized, delusional, defiant,

depressed, devastated and/or emotional-commotional functioning, or in
other ways disrupted emotional functioning.

The fourth major structure in the mid-brain is an almond-shaped little thing

called the amygdala. This is one of the oldest parts of the brain, and it
handles the importance question. That is, it asks, “How serious, significant,
immediate action-requiring, dangerous, survival-threatening, etc. is this?”
Its primary operational impact is anxiety/fear/panic-induction, but it also
mediates all “gut level” emotions, significances, and action-imperative
implications of things. Most conditioned anxiety, fear, panic and blind self-
protective stuff emanates from here.

When it goes off strongly, it throws the whole system into emergency mode.
In more run-of-the-mill things, it runs our impulses, inclinations, leanings,
attractions and aversions, impetuses to explore further or to back away, etc.
Trouble here shows up as either “frayed nerves” over-reactivity to things or
as stuporous and unresponsive under-reactivity, as if they had no idea of the
significance of things.

AMYGDALA PROBLEMS

181
“Emotional overwhelm.” They are having problems with the intrusion into
their consciousness, experience and functioning of massively traumatic
emotions from severely damaging experiences in their past. Things like
“burst-outs,” self-hatred, sexual shut down, etc. are occurring.

They underwent a great deal of emotional trauma in their childhood, and

current events are re-activating those and associated experiences.

HIPPOCAMPUS PROBLEMS

“I don’t remember…” They are having trouble with their sense of

continuity of their self and with their experience of the continuum of events
and reactions over time, such as amnesia, fugue states, multiple personality
alters sub-routine take-overs, senility, etc. They are the product of a
severely denial-dominated dysfunctional and destructive family.

HYPOTHALAMUS PROBLEMS

“Emotionally disrupted.” They are prone to deranged, demoralized,

delusional, defiant, depressed, devastated and/or emotional-commotional or
in other ways disturbed emotional functioning. They grew up in a severely
emotionally damaging dysfunctional family.

MEDULA/BRAIN STEM (Back base of the skull “instinctive system”

center)

“Self-endangering.” There are seriously threatening disruptions of the life

maintenance systems. They received a “Don’t be!” injunction.

THALAMUS PROBLEMS

“Brain-dead.” They are prone to functioning without awareness on

“automatic pilot,” to systematic screw-ups due to lack of tracking or
comprehension, to being “lost in space,” etc. Their family was intensely
awareness-avoidant and automated in their functioning.

BRAIN TUMOR

182
“Demoralization-despair.” There is deep mental conflict about being fully in
the world and dealing effectively with reality. They are withdrawing in
confusion and disoriented devastation. They are manifesting incorrect
beliefs and interpretation systems, along with a refusal to change old
patterns. They are unable to “reprogram the bio-computer” of the mind,
with a resulting pessimistic depression and nihilistic worry. A major issue is
growing to unmanageable proportions, because they are unable to revise
their views of things. It is the result of highly rigid rearing in childhood.
(See the part(s) of the brain affected for more information)

“BREAKING WATER” (Prematurely -- in the birth process)

“Kicking them out.” They are intensely ambivalent about or actively

rejecting of having a child or of having this child. They want it to be over
and done with. It is the result of having been similarly reacted to as an
infant.

*************************************

“Alone on their own.” They feel thrust into the world without a safety net,
that they are all they’ve got, and that “One strike and I’m out.” They have
felt no sense of protection from the very beginning, and this process is
setting the pattern as an anchor experience of a rather major magnitude that
will affect them the rest of their life.

It is the result of ambivalent or impatient maternal attitudes that have

resulted in the abrupt commencement of their life. On the soul level, it
reflects an intention to derive maximal learning from self-generated
experiences and a sense of separation, isolation and deprivation.

BREAST PROBLEMS

“Maternal conflicts.” They are having deep conflicts over their maternal
attitudes, home and motherhood. They feel unable or unwilling to be
loving, nurturing and supportive, due to never having been nurtured or due
to having the maternal denigrated in their family.

************************************

183
“Slave feelings.” They feel exploited, unappreciated and oppressed in
response to a patriarchal environment. They grew up in just such a family,
and they have consistently drawn to themselves repeats of that pattern.

************************************

“Serve-aholic.” They are over-nurturing, self-denying and insufficiently

nourished, refusing to nourish themselves and putting everyone else first.
They are also conflicted about their ability to be nurturing. It is a function of
having been totally defined as a source of nurturance as a child.

************************************

“Allure issues.” They have deep conflicts over their sexual attractiveness,
sexuality, seductive projection and/or erotic sensitivity and receptivity. They
feel insufficiently feminine or attractive, due to devaluing by their family.

************************************

“Erotic rejection.” They feel sex-ploitated and they deeply resent it. It is a
function of having encountered such treatment a lot in their family.

************************************

“Tripod-rage.” They have a significant case of the irresistible urge to kick

anything with three legs arising from a patriarchal family, from a
dysfunctional father, and/or from maternal programming.

************************************

“Gender role problems.” They feel too feminine, in the sense of feeling like
a second class citizen, because they were treated as such at home.

************************************

“Womanhood issues.” They have many conflicts over their femininity. They
feel “masculine” or “unfeminine” because of the strong forcefulness of their
personality and/or because of intense devaluation by their family on the
grounds of their gender.

184
 ************************************

“Potencylessness-resentment.” They feel powerless and unable to cope with

life on their own two feet, and they resent it. It is a pattern which comes
from being competence-undermined and power-prevented as a child.

************************************

“Love-avoidance.” They have deep conflicts over the role of love in their
life. They feel unable to be loving, as a result of never having been loved
themselves.

************************************

“Forget it!” They feel that love is a “poison apple,” because that’s what it
was as a child.

************************************

“Love-aholic.” They are starved for love, and they are not finding it because
they imprinted on unloving people.

************************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They feel they don’t deserve love, as a
result of a severely shaming and denigrating family.

************************************

“Self-rejecting.” They have a profound sense of worthlessness, and they are

intensely self-belittling. They were systematically denigrated and rejected
as a child.

RIGHT BREAST PROBLEM

“How do I do it right?” They are encountering issues over their preferred

forms, means of expressing and/or recipients of their nurturance, sexuality-
manifestation or love.

185
LEFT BREAST PROBLEM

“Where do I get it?” They have issues over their preferred sources of
nurturance, sexuality or love.

****************************

“How dare I?” There are issues over felt deservingness of nurturance,
sexual support and expression and/or love and caring.

BREAST CANCER

“Sucked dry.” They are struggling with feelings of being “eaten out of
house and home.” They have a lot of exploitation-resentment and a strong
rejection of motherhood or the maternal role. They are deeply in conflict
about the whole feminine role and what it means to be a woman in society
vs. her own needs, desires and qualities, as she sees it.

Usually, this development represents the culmination of a co-dependent

lifestyle generated in a dysfunctional family. They finally have reached the
point where “This is an up with which I will no longer put!”

RIGHT BREAST CANCER

“Enough already!” They are fed up with the way in which they are being
utilized, the types of resources and responses they are required to produce.
They are also ashamed and self-disliking.

LEFT BREAST CANCER

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are sick and tired of
being everyone’s “tit,” and they are not willing to have it continue. They
feel that their acceptance has been solely on this basis, and they now insist
on recognition, validation and appreciation for who they are. (See
CANCER)

BREAST CYSTS; BREAST LUMPS

186
“Sexual rejection.” They are feeling or being rejected sexually by their
partner or the world at large. Or they are resentful of the sexual attentions
they get. In either case, it is reflective of an underlying sense of
worthlessness or unacceptability except through their sexual appeal. They
grew up in a conditionally loving household that was also sex-ploitative in
their approach.

***************************************

“Hyper-maternal.” They are engaged in over-mothering, in excessive

nurturing output. In the process, they are cutting off nourishment to
themselves. There is a real inability to be themselves, and they are “serving
themselves up on a platter” to others. They have insufficient self-respect
and self-commitment -- a “Me last!” orientation, derived from an
exploitative, dysfunctional and/or denigrating family.

***************************************

“Mama knows best!” They have over-protective and overbearing attitudes.

They are infantilizing and maturity-derailing “smother-mothering.” They
refuse to allow others to be themselves, and they are feeding wrong ideas to
those being “ministered to.” It arose from their being the only “sane one” in
a dysfunctional family.

RIGHT BREAST CYST

“Cut it out!” They intensely dislike the realms and manners in which they
are being drawn upon and “drained.”

***************************

“One and only way.” They have rigidly fixed ideas of how things need to be
done.

LEFT BREAST CYST

“Drained out.” They are becoming exhausted and depleted by all their self-
denial and co-dependent “serve-aholic” output.

187
 ***************************

“Mama knows best!” They are imposing their values, assumptions and
priorities on those around them in a “dominatrix” manner.

BREAST DISCHARGE

“Frustrated motherhood.” They are not being able to manifest their maternal
principle effectively. It is a situation where either:

1) their actual mothering process is being painful and/or unsuccessful, or

2) they are being prevented from manifesting their maternal qualities and/or
their generativity, or

3) they are not manifesting the children and/or child-rearing they need to
do.

It is a pattern that got started in their exploitative and denigrating

patriarchal household, in which the feminine and the maternal were
devalued, distorted and/or exploited.

RIGHT BREAST DISCHARGE

“Derailed.” They are frustrated over the blockage of their ways of

nurturing, generative expression, and care-taking by the environment or by
circumstances.

LEFT BREAST DISCHARGE

“Prevented.” They are experiencing a sense of non-fulfillment arising from

being prevented from manifesting their generative/maternal capacities and
motivations.

BREAST INFLAMMATION

“Burned up.” They are sick and tired of all the sorrows of womanhood.
They deeply resent the restrictions, over-requirements, exploitation,
sexualization, and on, and on, and on. They may also have a strong case of

188
“tripod-rage”- the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs. She is
either the product of a patriarchal household and/or of a tripod-raging
mother.

BREAST SORENESS

“Sexual rejection.” They are feeling or being rejected sexually by their

partner or by the world at large. Or they are resentful of the sexual
attentions they get. In either case, it is reflective of an underlying sense of
worthlessness or unacceptability except through their sexual appeal. They
grew up in a conditionally loving household that was also sex-ploitative in
their approach.

*****************************

“Over-mothering.” They are putting out excessive nurturing and cutting off
nourishment to themselves. There is an inability to be themselves, they are
serving themselves up on a platter to others. They have insufficient self-
respect and self -commitment. It is a “Me last!” orientation derived from an
exploitative, dysfunctional, and/or denigrating family.

*****************************

“Over-protective and overbearing attitudes.” They are engaged in an

infantilizing and maturity-derailing “smother-mothering” pattern. They
refuse to allow others to be themselves, and they are feeding wrong ideas to
those being “ministered to.” It is a “Mama knows best!” attitude arising
from being the only “sane one” in a dysfunctional family.

RIGHT BREAST SORENESS

“Enough already!” They have an intense dislike of the realms and manners
in which they are being drawn upon and “drained.”

************************

“My way or the highway.” They have rigidly fixed ideas of how things need
to be done.

189
LEFT BREAST SORENESS

“Drained out.” They are becoming exhausted and depleted by all their self-
denial and co-dependent “serve-aholic” output.

************************

“Mama knows best!” They are imposing their values, assumptions and
priorities on those around them.

BREAST TUMOR

“Destiny-derailment.” There is a frustrated desire to grow and be fulfilled

through home and/or children. They put all their eggs in this basket, and it
came up empty. They were over-restricted in their outlook on possibilities
for themselves as a child.

************************************

“Love-aholic.” They are looking for love in all the wrong places. They
imprinted on a dysfunctional family and intimates and are trying to put a
new ending on the old story with the same type of people -- with the
predictable results.

************************************

“In their face.” They are experiencing having their “conditional nurturance”
backfiring on them, in the sense that they intended to guarantee love and/or
control via generating an obligation to them in others, and instead it resulted
in negative consequences. It is a continuation of a pattern established in a
manipulative and exploitative family.

RIGHT BREAST TUMOR

“Wrong recipients.” They are feeling little or no fulfillment in or from the

recipients of their maternal feelings in their life.

*******************************

190
“Wrong choices.” They are deeply frustrated with the type of people they
give their love to.

*******************************

“Wrong ways.” They are conflicted over the methods they use to garner
love or control.

LEFT BREAST TUMOR

“Vast wasteland.” They are finding insufficient joy and fulfillment in their
expression of their maternal capacities.

********************************

“Love-starved.” They are realizing that they aren’t getting the love they
need.

********************************

“Down the drain.” They are demoralized over their failure to get the return
on their investment that they intended.

BREATHING PROBLEMS; MOUTH BREATHING

“I don’t dare!” There is a fear of or a refusal to take in life fully. They are
feeling unsafe in the world and that they can’t “breathe easily.” They feel
they don’t dare live life fully and freely. It came from an untrustworthy and
dangerous family.

***********************************

“Forget it!” They are having a “love is a poison apple” experience, the
feeling that love leads to their being engulfed and hemmed in or to their
being harmed in some way. It is the result of an exploitative, passive-
aggressive and/or seductive-destructive family.

***********************************

191
“Maybe I should leave.” They have the experience that they don’t even
have the right to exist, that they have no right to expect support, nurturance
or love. They have profound worthlessness feelings that lead to life-
avoidance. It was generated by a severely shame-inducing, denigrating and
depriving family, starting at the very beginning.

BREATHING DIFFICULTY; BREATHING INTERRUPTIONS

“Maternal deprivation.” They are intensely sensitive, fearful and longing for
mother love or love from someone close. They have a lot of
disappointment, bitterness, unforgivingness and resentment of being over-
worked.

They are fatalistic, hostility-repressing, compulsively over-giving,

hypersensitive, and lonely. At the same time, they dare not express or even
acknowledge these feelings, out of fear of total rejection and abandonment.

There is a great deal of deep-seated guilt, shame and grief arising out of
this, and they are joy-avoidant, happiness-squashing, and love-deflecting,
all in the misguided hope that they will thereby finally earn the “God
Housekeeping Seal of Approval” from “God (zilla).” In effect, they are so
self-suppressing that they are suffocating themselves. They are full of
family taboos, social restrictions and moral inhibitions, all learned in an
intensely repressive family which forced a “model child” adjustment on
them.

BREECH PRESENTATION

“I’m not so damned sure I want to BE here!” They are having an intense
ambivalence about entering the physical plane per se, about entering in
these times, and/or about entering into this family environment.

While their soul was aware of the parameters and processes that would be
involved it and chose to have this experience, the emerging ego is not at all
sure it can handle what is coming. On the other hand, they do also not really
want to leave either. So they seek to delay or soften the confrontation with
the realties of their situation.

192
 ***********************************

“I’m not so damned sure I want this individual to be here!” She has intense
ambivalence about giving birth, about giving birth in these times and
circumstances, or about giving birth to this individual. So they seek an
unconscious compromise that ends up with this “bass-ackwards”
presentation. Much of this comes from equally ambivalent feelings about
their own birth by their mother.

“BRITTLE BONES” SYNDROME (Extremely vulnerable to breakage)

“Cosmic abandonment.” They have a profound feeling that nobody cares.

The feeling is that there is no longer (or there never was) any foundation to
build on. They feel abandoned by the “Home Office” (All There Is), and
that there is nothing out there to sustain them. Their experience is that they
are “alone on their own,” that they have been in effect “left to their own
devices,” and that they are therefore highly vulnerable and feeling
continuously endangered. They feel totally betrayed by the Cosmos.

They have a good deal of fear, anger and frustration with the very structure
of the Universe and with the fundamental nature of life. They feel
absolutely unsupported, with no sense if safety. They feel that there is just
no love for them from God.

Their interpretation of it is that they live in a heartless “random Universe,”

and that they lost out in life this time around. In reality it is a situation in
which their Destiny is designed to expand their soul, and to serve the
Cosmos with their life experiences and contributions.

The experiential basis of all this was a family in which their needs were not
comprehended or met enough in a “raising themselves by their own
bootstraps” situation. The whole thing may be reflective of previous
incarnations in which they themselves “betrayed their contract” and the
Universe, which now requires restitution.

BROKEN BLOOD VESSELS

193
“Self-rejection.” They are operating out of an underlying assumption that
there is something fundamentally wrong with them. They therefore feel that
it is unjustified for them to experience love, joy and abundance in their life.
As a result, they have guilt feelings when any of these arise or arrive. They
are also prone to attack themselves in the areas and arenas where they
experience such inputs. It comes from neglectfully rejecting early
experiences that lead to a chronic low level depression and dejection. (See
the area(s) affected for more information)

“BROKEN HEART SYNDROME” (Stress cardiomyopathy) [Pseudo-heart

attack] (Much more frequent in women, particularly older women)

“Oh my God, NO!!” They end up showing all the symptoms of a heart
attack in response to some profound loss or threat, such as the end of a
profoundly important relationship or a serious threat to their child.

It occurs in the context of a sense of overwhelmed powerlessness due to the

nature of the precipitating circumstances. It usually happens after a lifelong
history of having been able to keep such traumas and threats at bay with
their competence and control. There is a sense of there being no support
system in this crisis, with an accompanying feeling at some level of
abandonment by the “Home Office” (All That Is). They grew up in a “the
buck stops here” situation in which they were the only one capable and
committed enough to prevent disaster in their dysfunctional family.

BRONCHIAL PROBLEMS; BRONCHIAL SPASMS

“God must be Al Capone!” They have an underlying distrust of the

Universe and God. They live in a lot of betrayal-fear, implication-anxiety,
and insecurity in the world. They feel unsafe and unprotected, and they live
in an “emotional foxhole.”

They are out of synch with the environment with a skeptical, “I’ll believe it
when it works for me!” attitude. They are an ejectee-rejectee-dejectee who
feels unwanted, with a lot of separation-anxiety that is actually a separation
from God experience. Their underlying deep despair and depression arises
from anger with themselves, guilt, shame, and a felt need for punishment
for their “sins.”

194
They grew up in an angry, rejecting, yelling, inflamed dysfunctional family,
or who were silently seething volcanoes. They “force fed” and “smother-
loved” the individual out of their own needs, rather than out of those of the
individual.

BRONCHITIS (Inflammation of the windpipe)

“What the hell’s going on here!?” There is fear, tension, anxiety, and a
feeling of things being very unsettled. When they are under stress or
vulnerable, they feel that the world is not a safe place. They feel that they
will be betrayed and attacked, even by friends and family. They feel
somehow responsible for all the ills of the world, and that they are alone in
the world. There are many deep despair and depression feelings to get off
their chest, along with anger or rage. They are suppressing screams of grief
and rage as they live life in an “emotional foxhole.”

They are deeply rejecting of what is happening inside, of their feelings

about themselves, and of how they are doing. They are intensely frustrated
and angry with themselves, but they are afraid to express or let go of it. This
is all the result of an inflamed family environment that was saturated with
silent or not-so-silent yelling and arguments. They got lost in the
belligerence, and they felt severely rejected, with a resulting grief-
strickenness. They have incorporated their conflictual environment, and
they are at war with themselves.

BRONCHIAL OBLITERATIVE OBSTRUCTIVE PNEUMONIA (BOOP)

(Severe blockage of breathing leading to threatened or experienced
suffocations)

“God must be Al Capone!” They have an underlying distrust of the

Universe and God. They live in a lot of betrayal-fear, implication-anxiety,
and insecurity in the world. They feel unsafe and unprotected, and they live
in an “emotional foxhole.” They are out of synch with the environment with
a skeptical, “I’ll believe it when it works for me!” attitude. They are an
ejectee-rejectee-defectee who feels unwanted, with a lot of separation-
anxiety that is actually a separation from God experience.

195
They grew up in an angry, rejecting, yelling, inflamed dysfunctional family,
or who were silently seething volcanoes. They “force fed” and “smother-
loved” the individual out of their own needs, rather than out of those of the
individual.

*******************************

“Tie that grinds.” They are feeling totally stifled by an overly close and/or
dominating relationship. They are being overwhelmed and restricted, they
are very angry about it. They don’t feel they can do or say anything about it,
for fear of catastrophic consequences. It is the result of an authoritarian and
oppressive and possessive family.

*******************************

“Self-revulsion.” They are “choking to death” on their own guilt and shame.
They feel that they should be thoroughly punished or even destroyed for
their “sins.” It comes from a severely accusatory, blame-throwing,
moralistic and punitive family.

*******************************

“Suppressed grief.” They are desperate and tired of life, due to generalized
disturbances in their processes and situation. They are having a “salt poured
in emotional wounds” experience that is not being allowed to heal. They are
suffering under the influence of their lifelong repressed sorrow, grief and
despair.

They are fearful and anxious to the point of being overcome with
desperation and futility feelings. They are struggling with confusion-
inducing emotional conflict, and there is a failure to maintain immunity to
negative ideas. They are the product of a self-defeatingness generating
dysfunctional family who instilled a sense of being hapless, helpless and
hopeless.

SUDDEN SUFFOCATION EXPERIENCES

196
“Refusing to grow up.” They are totally terrified of the process of life and
of the environment around them. They have a fearful distrusting of just
about everything, and they feel utterly unsafe in the world.

On top of which, the message in childhood was, “Don’t you dare ever grow
up and away or beyond our control!” They therefore got stuck in childhood,
afraid to take the world on its own terms.

SUFFOCATED TO DEATH

“Self-annihilation.” They in effect “strangled themselves to death” with

their guilt and shame. They had the feeling that they should be severely
disciplined or even terminated for their “evilness.” They were convinced
that there was something wrong with this picture and that was that they
were still in it. It was the result of an extremely rejecting, accusation-
attributing, blame-throwing, moralistic and punitive parenting pattern.

BRONCHIAL DRYING, BURNING AND PAIN

“No right to life.” There is no “juiciness” in their life, and there is

insufficient life fluid in their body. They believe at the deep gut level that
they should not have needs, wants and desires, and their life experience
reflects that. There is profound self-rejection and hurt, in the form of severe
suppressed grief. It comes from “NOW look what you’ve done!” parenting.
They feel that they have no right to experience, express, relieve or release.
There is also a great deal of repressed rage at their life history and
experience, along with unexpressed outraged indignation at the Cosmos for
allowing all this to happen.

The result is effective systematic self-deprivation as atonement and as

fusion with their severely rejecting mother in a childhood fixated belief that
they somehow deserve what has happened and what continues to occur.
This often takes the form of “one way street” compulsive giving and
unrequited love/caring/commitment/contribution in their life.

There was active hostility for their existing, for their being a “demand,” and
for their being a threat/rival to their mother. They were treated as the
“intimate enemy” and as the source of all their family’s problems, often in a

197
paradoxical outcome of their unusually potent and resourced nature. Their
mother’s unconscious feeling being that they had the power to “make it all
better” and instead they generated threats, all her problems and humiliation.

BRUISES

“Self-abusing.” They are turning the little bumps in life into self-
punishments. They are harsh on themselves, and they are self-denigrating in
a self-rejecting manner. In addition, they are having vivid emotions and
mental pain that they are not expressing. They feel very much at risk in the
world.

They are tending not to pay attention to what they are doing and where they
are going in life. They are prone to think of themselves as a victim, and as
floating flotsam on the sea of life, having to suffer whatever comes their
way. This is all reflecting the insensitive and accusatory family attitude
towards them when they were growing up.

Some bruise colors (At Onset):

BLACK

“Self-hatred.” They feel they should do the world a favor and go play on the
freeway or go get the “Hulk” to wipe them out. They often seek to comply.
It comes from an intensely hostile and attacking family.

BLUE

“Self-distrust.” They fear that their motivations are unreliable and/or their
competence can’t be counted on. It comes from “Can’t you do anything
right!?” and “Now what are you up to!” parenting.

BROWN

“Guilt.” They feel they have done something wrong again. They were
always told they were the cause of whatever went wrong in their family.

GREEN

198
“Despair-monger.” The feeling is that it’s all going to turn out very badly. It
arises from a demoralizingly dysfunctional family. They are being given the
message that “the war is over,” and that they don’t need to experience
things so bleakly any more.

PURPLE

“Shame.” They feel there is something inherently “bad, wrong and evil”
about who they are. It comes from intensely rejecting parenting.

YELLOW

“Anxiety and fear.” They feel unsafe in the world, as if something very
untoward will happen to them. It comes from growing up in an
unpredictably subconsciously and subterraneanly sabotaging and/or sadistic
dysfunctional family. (See the part(s) of the body affected for more
information)

EASILY BRUISED

“Under siege.” They are feeling bombarded with traumatic and stressful
events that are experienced as being malevolent -- either in the form of
particular people or systems and/or in terms of a hostile Universe. If this is
a chronic condition, it reflects their having grown up in a degrading,
dysfunctional, abusive and/or cruel family.

BUBONIC PLAGUE (Swollen lymph glands, severe fever and delirium)

“Return of the repressed.” They are experiencing a “bursting out” of

“shadow-shoved” and suppressed desires, dreads and destructive
motivations. They have been “keeping on trucking and never looking back”
all their lives, and by now they have a very impressive “gunny sack of
emotional monsters” in there.

The result is that they have been “running on empty” so long that their
“emotional body” has broken down, and they therefore have no immunity
to external or internal attacking agents. Now it is all “coming to roost” on

199
their head, and it is spewing out all over their body. They are unable to
process or release past wounds and they are now consumed by them.

It is the result of a massively repressive, suppressive, oppressive and

aggressive paranoid patriarchal family who “shoved it all into the sub-
basement” while they kept up a self-deluding persona of “normalcy.” The
family relied extremely heavily on intense shame-inducing and
subterranean threats and assaults in a highly pathologically dysfunctional
manner.

BULIMIA (Compulsive food bingeing and then vomiting)

“What a disaster!” They have a hopeless terror of life, along with a frantic
stuffing and purging of their self-hatred and self-disgust. They are a
profoundly self-rejecting “love-aholic” who has no hope whatsoever of ever
getting the love they need for reasons they can never fathom. They are
suffering from a deep depression and desperation.

Theirs is a “magical misery tour” and “nameless terror of which they dare
not speak” experience of life. So they turn to self-solace in the form of
“controllable” love-substitutes in the form of food binges. Then their self-
hatred surfaces again, and they “punish” and “purify” themselves with
purging, which is also a way of keeping their “terrible secret.”

It was generated by a horrifyingly dysfunctional and rejecting family who,

however, assiduously disguised their hatred with seeming lovingness, so
that the individual took on all their hatred and rejection as deserved
“punishment.”

*************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have the feeling that they are unable to regulate
themselves effectively, and that they have no control over themselves. They
feel that their needs are never met, and that they can’t measure up to
people’s expectations of them. They erroneously see themselves as
effectively not up to snuff or up to meeting the demands of life. They were
consistently undermined in their ability to cope with things in their
possessive and dysfunctional family.

200
BUNIONS (See FOOT PROBLEMS)

BURNS

“Burned up.” Deep pain, anger, grief and other hot emotions are being
repressed and ignored. They are therefore ragefully resentful, indignantly
incensed, and burning up with anger. They feel that they are getting one
whale of a raw deal from life, and that they are surrounded with strife. They
are fulminatingly furious at the way their life is going.

They are also experiencing a deep resistance to letting love in because they
have been badly “burned” all too often. So they are “solo-tripping” or they
are being “invaded” and it is violating their boundaries. This whole reaction
may have been precipitated by a move they have made or a decision they
have taken about their security.

The pattern is the result of a maddeningly frustrating dysfunctional family

who did not respect their boundaries, experiences and needs due to their
desperate dependency, their dysfunctionality, and/or their destructiveness.

BOILING LIQUID BURN

“Hot hurts.” Some situation or someone, usually an intimate or significant

other, has burned or is burning them emotionally, to their great chagrin.

CHEMICAL BURN

“Corrosive inflictions.” They are being subjected to severely virulent

devastations from their environment, and they are being consumed with
fury about it.

DIRECT FIRE CONTACT BURN

“Vicious violation.” They are going through an intense environmental

rapacious invasion, violation or assault that infuriates them around ethical
and personal sanctity issues, and perhaps even around personal survival
issues.

ELECTRICAL BURN

201
“Spiritual rage.” They are involved in a severe spiritual conflict or felt
violation by the Cosmos, over which they are burning up.

FLAMING FLUID BURN

“Emotional attacks.” They are being severely, massively, and enragingly

violated by significant others and/or the environment, perhaps to the point
of endangerment.

FRICTION BURN (e.g. “Rug Burn”)

“Shooting themselves in the foot.” They are having difficulty achieving

their goals, due to self-derailing patterns generated by their family, and they
are furiously frustrated by that.

HOT SURFACE BURN

“Ethical issues.” A serious mental or moral issue is burning them up. They
are in deep internal fury over a violation of their paradigm or of their moral
framework.

INTENSE HEAT BURN

“Virulent impacts.” They are being subjected to severe interpersonal and

situational stress-induction, along with maddening negative evaluations,
accusations and attributions.

RADIATION BURN

“What do I expect?” They are being deprived, derailed or prevented from

meeting their needs and purposes in a manner that has the effect of eliciting
both fulminating fury and massive self-blame, along the lines of feeling
they should not have tried for it in the first place because they “don't
deserve” the positive outcome goal.

ROPE BURN

“Self-defeating.” They are having difficulty achieving their goals, due to

self-derailing patterns generated by their family, and they are furiously

202
frustrated by that.

STEAM BURN

“Raged at.” They are experiencing a situation in which a significant person

in their life is angry at them, due to some characteristic or situation of the
individual’s -- justified or not.

SUNBURN

“Vulnerability-anxiety” and “boundary issues.” The feeling is that they are

insufficiently protected from invasion, exploitation and abuse by the
environment at the present time.

(See the part(s) of the body affected for more information)

DEATH BY BURNS

“Totally consumed.” They were so angry over their life that they were
unable to tolerate being here any more. They were “burned to a crisp” with
their indignation and frustration, and they had had it.

********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

BURSITIS (Inflammation of the joints)

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are feeling rejected for what they are,
in the sense of being totally unappreciated. They are feeling very victimized
and put upon, and they experience a lack of love. They feel somehow that
they will never receive the acceptance, validation and affection they need.
They are the product of a systematically rejecting family system.

*************************************

203
“Repressed rage.” They are full of suppressed resentment and anger and
they have a strongly squashed desire to hit someone. They continuously
ruminate and recriminate over their “indignities,” and they cling to every
item like “super-glue.” They have a chronic bitterness and resentment, they
are forever sending out arrows of hatred, jealousy, general discord and other
negative vibrations. Their mind is wound up so tight in their hostile
preoccupations that it grinds their whole system to a halt, and they are
constantly suppressing their desire to strike out and hit people. At this point,
they are pushing another person around, or they are being pushed around by
another person. They are the product of an intensely hostile home.

*************************************

“Will of iron.” They have a rigid will and very strong opinions that they
will not and probably cannot change. They are unbending in their
expression and self-manifestation. They never let go of anything, as they try
to be the “boss of the Universe” in an effort to make life just the way they
want it. They grew up in a highly inflexible patriarchal and perhaps
authoritarian family, and they “identified with the aggressor.”

*************************************

“Fight or flight.” They are immersed in a strong reaction to their situation,

and they are chronically anxious. They feel that things have gotten out of
hand, and that they can’t regain control.

They feel that they can’t do anything to change their circumstances, and
they are utterly frustrated with the way their life is going. They have no
trust of the “Home Office,” and they feel that “It is botching the job.”
Underneath all this is a feeling of utter powerlessness and a severe self-and
other-rejection arising from their being treated as the “intimate enemy” by
their family. (See the joints affected for more information)

BUTTOCKS PROBLEMS

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They have a fear of not having enough capacity to

cope with life’s demands. They are intimidated by those in power, and they

204
are afraid to exercise their own potency. It was created by a family who was
extortionistic in its approach.

**********************************

“Sexual shame.” They have a lot of sexual guilt and/or fearfulness

generated in a repressive and/or sex-ploitative household.

**********************************

“Shit on you!” They have a defiant and defiling attitude, a kind of

“mooning” approach to life. It is the result of an authoritarian yet
“windmill-tilting” (self-defeatingly injustice- “whistle-blowing”)
household.

**********************************

“Chicken Little.” They have a good deal of survival-anxiety and a kind of

“worriedly waiting for a rainy day” sense of insecurity and lack of support
from the Universe. It derives from a depriving family.

**********************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have a real fear of letting go and “letting fly

with one.” They are afraid of their feelings, reactions and sexuality. It arose
from having been reared in a severely restrictive family environment.

RIGHT BUTTOCKS

“How to do it right?” They are having conflicts over their strategies and
tactics in handling power, dealing with their sexuality, expressing their
disdain, or protecting their interests.

LEFT BUTTOCKS

“Aw com’on now!” There is a lot of dissatisfaction with their relationship to

power, sexuality, the world and/or the Universe.

BUTTOCKS ACHE (Deep muscle pain)

205
“Despair-freak out.” They are experiencing an activation of their deep
underlying sense that things are going to come to a bad end. It generates a
sense of apprehension, negative expectations and depression. It usually
reflects a healing process as old, foundational and painful experiences and
dreaded anticipations are coming up for clearing. But not always.

It arises from an early and subsequent formative history of a rather severely

demoralizing and depriving nature, as well as from intense messaging that
they are only getting their “just desserts.”

RIGHT BUTTOCKS ACHE

“Is this all there is?” They are having a sense of the return of their early
despair and demoralization in reaction to current life developments.

LEFT BUTTOCKS ACHE

“Do I have what it takes?” They are deeply concerned about whether they
have the wherewithal to handle life’s requirements and/or to deserve or
expect a good ending to things.

BUTTOCKS “CRACK” PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have a fear of manifesting their destiny

capabilities in the form of personal potency and capacity for
sexuality/intimacy. That was a major “No, no!”

RIGHT SIDE OF BUTTOCKS “CRACK”

“Destiny/intimacy/sexuality competence-anxiety.” They have the fear that

they don’t have what it takes to manifest their purpose and nature and/or
their relationship. They could do no right in their family.

CENTER OF BUTTOCKS “CRACK”

“How dare I!?” They are having a major harm-alarm about intending or
commencing manifestation of their destiny and/or of their spouse-bonding.
They are the product of a severely enmeshed and engulfing family.

206
LEFT SIDE OF BUTTOCKS “CRACK”

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have a profound fear that if they

manifest their destiny, successful intimacy, or full sexuality, all hell will
break loose, or that “God will strike them dead.” It was pounded into them
that they don't deserve and should never have such experiences.

BUTTOCKS “FOLD” PROBLEMS (Horizontal crease at the top of the leg)

“Freaked out.” They are being overwhelmed by all sorts of potent emotions
such as cope-ability-anxiety, sexual shame, in-your-face resentment,
generalized anxiety and self-distrust. It’s like they have to confront their
demons in all those areas to clear them out at this time. It is the result of
having been reared in an oppressive/suppressive authoritarian and wrong-
making family.

RIGHT “FOLD” PROBLEMS

“Strategic concerns.” They are quite agitated about how to correctly go

about the business of manifesting their potency, sexuality, self-protection
and indignation.

LEFT “FOLD” PROBLEMS

“What’s wrong here?” Their feeling is that something serious is awry with
the way everything is being handled on the motivational level in the world
with regard to power, sexuality and basic caring

BY-PASS OPERATION (Heart)

“Hard-nosed hoser” (on the other side of the rubber hose is a latent
criminal). They are operating in a “heartless” manner, in the sense of not
allowing or believing in the flow of love. They have to “hands on control”
everything or “it will all go to Hell in a breadbasket.” They are functioning
like an “over-extended octopus,” trying to do it all single-handedly, with no
help from any friends.

207
They are operating with the underlying conscious or unconscious
assumption that they are alone on their own, an ejectee/rejectee/dejectee
from the Cosmos, because either there is no God, or because they blew it
royally with the “Home Office” and they are therefore getting their “just
desserts.” It is the result of “Never good enough!” parenting in a family in
which they were nevertheless regarded as the “lynch pin” of the system
whose fault everything really is. (The more valves to be by-passed and the
more frequent the operation, the more intense this dynamic is.)

Section 2

208
B

209
67

210
B

68

211
69

70

71

72

73

74

75

76

77

212
78

79

80

81

82

83

84

85

213
86

87

88

89

90

91

92

93

94

214
95

96

97

98

99

100

101

102

215
103

104

105

106

107

108

109

216
CAISSON DISEASE (See “BENDS”)

CALCIFICATION (Deposits of calcium in the body)

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are rigidly adhering to standards and

patterns that are unrealistic, outdated, and self-defeating. They have to rely
on them to provide themselves a sense of security in a highly insecurity-
generating world. They feel that they are in over their head, and that they
have to handle it by strictly adhering to the tried and true. It is the result
either of a highly regimented and perfectionistic family and/or of having
had to serve as the “sane one,” the “Rock of Gibraltar,” in a severely
dysfunctional family.

CALF PROBLEMS

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They have a real fear of the future, along
with a lot of implication-anxiety, leading to immobilization and inactivity.
They fear taking action, lest all hell break loose. They are into growth-
avoidance and excessive conservatism, along with a sense that their basic
beliefs in life are being betrayed. There is a great deal of repressed
resentment-rage associated with this, and they have a lot of “run amok-
anxiety” about losing control of that anger.

They are also worried that they don’t have what it takes to support
themselves as it is. They are therefore very reluctant to propel themselves
forward, to reach out to the Universe, to expand themselves or to unfold
through evolution and self-development. “Leave well enough alone! -- It’s
bad enough as it is without making further trouble!” is their attitude. It
comes from either a similar family culture or from a family in which any
form of self-development was systematically assaulted or undermined.

RIGHT CALF

“My way or the highway.” They have a lot of rigidity and stubbornness
about ways of dealing with things.

LEFT CALF

217
“I got no way.” There are conflicts over intentions and motivations for
moving forward towards life goals, progress-procuring, and/or destiny-
seeking -- or their lack of such.

CALLOUSES

“Hard-nosed hard hat.” They are displaying hardened concepts and

solidified fears. They are intensely rigid and unable to cooperate with the
flow of events, and they operate out of the “My mind’s made up -- don’t
confuse me with facts!” orientation. They don’t want to get involved, and
they are closed to new experiences and learning.

Their feeling is that life is harsh and that they have to protect their territory
at all costs. The result is rigidity and resistance to change. There is an
accumulation of mental energy that is not going anywhere, but which needs
to be released. They come from a highly restrictively restraining and
conservatively controlling family. (See the body parts affected for more
information)

CANCER

“Potencylessness-rage.” They feel overwhelmed and devastated, with a

sense of intense emptiness in their life. There have been many years of
inner conflict, guilt, hurt, grief, despair, resentment, confusion and/or
tension surrounding their deepest personal issues. It is connected with
feelings of hopelessness, inadequacy, helplessness and self-rejection. They
see no possibility of relevance or effectiveness from the Cosmic realm.

They have disharmonious attitudes towards parts of themselves that they

don’t want to deal with. They are consciously very loving, supportive and
kind, but they repress their personal feelings, in a long-suffering low self-
esteem pattern. They are a conservative controller and feeling-
avoider/denier “serve-aholic” who is suffering with deep emotional
disappointment while being systematically self-sacrificing. They give too
much, and they don’t take care of themselves, as they play out the “Rock of
Gibraltar” pattern that got started as they became the “family hoist” in their
dysfunctional family.

218
They carry all the problems and never complain, believing that they deserve
this fate. They seek to ignore their inner pain by attending continuously to
others’ needs. In effect, they don’t want to live any more, and they are
manifesting a death wish. They are the product of a rejecting yet
exploitative dysfunctional family who made them feel responsible for all
that went wrong in the family, about which they were unable to do
anything.

************************************

“Futility feelings.” They have strong feelings of failure and incompetence,

with little sense of self-accomplishment. They believe others are right, and
that they are wrong. They have a deep sense of inner worthlessness that
they compensate for with unstinting service while they bury their profound
rage at their whole life pattern. They repress their negative feelings,
especially their anger.

There is deep hurt and longstanding resentment arising from frustrated

plans and felt blockages by other people or circumstances. There have been
great troubles and sorrows that they have had to suffer silently and stuff.
They have a deep secret or heavy grief eating away at the self in a “What’s
the use?” orientation. They come from a demoralizingly dysfunctional
family.

*************************************

“Hot hates.” They are carrying deep-seated hatreds of the world around
them and of the people in it. They feel they are in a rotten situation, and that
they always have been. They hate it, and see no way out of it. They are
afraid to express their rage about it or to find an outlet for their creative
energy. There is considerable unresolved hate, revenge desires, envy,
jealousy and anger that is expressed subtly, subterraneanly and
subconsciously in such things as passive-aggressiveness, errors of omission,
self-inconveniencing and guilt-induction. They were subjected to
systematic subtle and subterranean attack by a hostile family.

**************************************

219
“Love-aholic.” They are an ambivalent love-seeker who never really is able
to connect or to let love in. They are suffering from a deep loneliness
which, however, they repress, for fear of “going down the tubes.”

They are self-chastising and alone-feeling, due to severely critical parenting

and systematic victimization in childhood. They are suffering from loss and
hopelessness, morbid fears, abandonment-depression and deprivation-
resentment.

Not uncommonly, the illness is precipitated by the loss of a loved one on

whom they were very dependent, and on whom they waited hand and foot,
sometimes years previously or symbolically. It trips off a sense of loss of
purpose and a deep sense of despair.

**************************************

“Seething volcano.” They are sitting on a lot of fulminating fury, and they
have made a lifestyle of acting on these feelings. They are a “long-suffering
victim” a “cruel world,” a “pseudo-saintly sufferer,” and/or an “avenging
angel” who is just giving people “what they deserve” because “they have
asked for it.”

They are completely identified with their “suffering succotash” persona, and
they are unaware of their rage and revenge pattern -- except as it fits in with
their rationales and justifications for their passive-aggressive vengeance
orchestrations. They feel “at the so-called mercy” of a grossly unjust world,
and they hate it. They are the product of an “apprenticeship training”
parenting pattern in a similar family culture. (See the part(s) of the body
involved for more information)

CANDIDA (Systemic yeast infection)

“Flying off in all directions.” They are feeling very scattered and
discombobulated. They just can’t seem to get it together to run their life
effectively. They come from a chaotic dysfunctional family who
undermined their capacity to cope.

*************************************

220
“Tie that grinds.” They are entrapped and engulfed in an imposed symbiotic
relationship with their mother that allows no independent life or self-
manifestation. They feel very scattered and non-productive, and they are
not able to own their own power.

They have a lot of unresolved negative feelings floating throughout their

system, and they have a pronounced propensity to be blame-throwing
regarding all this at the unconscious level.

They are demoralized and debilitated over the sealed unit folie a deux
externally enforced life plan play-out. They were in effect not allowed to
carry out their destiny or to connect or commit elsewhere -- only with
Mom.

*************************************

“Forget it!” They have a “love is a poison apple” -- “urban hermit” distrust
of and in relationships. There may be sexual guilt and deep conflict with an
intimate. They have been systematically prevented from manifesting any
creativity, sexuality, capacity for generating for the future, or bonding in
intimacy. They are the product of an engulfing, enmeshed and
untrustworthy relationship with their mother.

*************************************

“Fuming fury.” They are full of frustrated rage at the futility of their life and
situation. They seem to be going up the down escalator -- and losing in the
race. As a consequence, there is lots of resentment-rage that results in their
being untrusting and bitterly resentful in relationships. Underneath, they are
infuriated at their inability for meaningful contribution, connection and
commitment. Their family was intensely enmeshed, engulfing and
competence-undermining, out of a “keep ‘em around the old homestead”
motivational system.

**************************************

“One way street -- in.” They are highly demanding and exploitative in their
relationships, in a chronic taker pattern. They are untrusting and bitterly

221
resentful in their relationships. They can also be care-coercing and severely
draining. It is a case of a “whim of iron meets will of spaghetti” parenting
outcome.

CANKER SORES

“Back talk.” They are full of blaming, angry and judgmental attitudes, and
festering words that are held back and unexpressed. They are feeling
frustrated, criticized from all sides, and picked on in a situation in which
they do not feel free to talk back.

They are also overburdened with excessive responsibilities and

requirements that are loaded with emotional stress. They are detail-fixated,
anxiously hovering, and emotionally upheavaled.

It is a pattern that got started in a family in which they were frequently

“constructively criticized” in a manner that was really coming from the
family’s dysfunctionality.

RIGHT MOUTH CANKER SORE

“Sealed lips.” They are engaged in suppression of expression of their

feelings regarding how they must do things.

LEFT MOUTH CANKER SORE

“Squashed and mad.” There is a lot of seething frustration over not being
allowed to express or to manifest their true feelings and identity.

CENTER MOUTH CANKER SORE

“Royally pissed off.” They are caught up in a generalized resentment

reaction to everything in their life.

CAPILLARY PROBLEMS

“Agitated anxiety.” They are immersed in conflicts over their services to

others or over services they are receiving from others. It is the result of a

222
“never good enough” messaging parenting pattern. (See the body part(s)
affected for more information)

CARBUNCLE (Cluster of boils)

“Festering fury.” They are full of poisonous anger about personal injustices
that happened long ago and/or that are happening now. It represents a
longstanding suppressed intense resentment over past pains and anticipated
attacks. It is a pattern that reflects an injustice-nurturing family culture. (See
the body part(s) affected for more information)

CARDIAC ARREST (Heart-stoppage -- sudden)

“Death implant.” They have just violated the ultimate taboo of really
beginning to have success in work and/or love, and the result is that they
have been given a clear message that it is absolutely not allowed. They
were told in no uncertain terms in effect that if they ever cross the line to
self-manifestation and destiny play-out, they are to “stop dead in their
tracks.”

It is the result of a severely possessive “Don’t sit under the apple tree with
anyone else but me” parenting pattern from the mother. Her intention was,
“If I can’t have you, nobody can!” at base.

**************************************

“Cold-hearted.” They are trying to squeeze all the joy out of their heart in
favor of money, power, position, prestige or the like. They are not
expressing and manifesting love with others -- now and/or before. They
operate out of scarcity assumptions and the belief in constricting
limitations.

They tend to judge themselves a failure and therefore work furiously to

accomplish on the job and to dominate others. They are full of tension,
anxiety, resentment and suppressed aggression. Underneath, they are a
frightened child who is full of regrets, sorrow and remorse for a life wasted
and a “vast wasteland” experience. They are the product of highly

223
judgmental and demanding parenting that never gave them the message that
they were good enough.

CARDIAC ARRHYTHMIA [Irregular heartbeats] (See ARRHYTHMIA)

CARDIO-VASCULAR PROBLEMS

“Big Daddy.” They are hyper-achievement-motivated, and they have

feelings of having to “take care of the world” (either gender). They also feel
that they are in a never-ending competition in which they simply must come
out the winner. They are highly materialistic, impatient and agitated, and
they want things done yesterday.

There is an underlying lack of self-acceptance and a felt need to “atone” or

to “make up for” their personal lacks and their prior “letdowns” and
“betrayals” of those people and things which are important to them.

It comes from their having been in a “family hoist” position in which the
family depended on them to be the one to come through for them, and who
made it very clear to them every time something went wrong that they
“should have handled it.”

CARDIO-VASCULAR ACCIDENT (CVA) [Broken blood vessel in the

heart]

“Death wish.” This is the result of a subconscious desire to get out of here.
They have a “No one cares” attitude and an intense resistance to people and
things. They are rejecting life, and they would rather die than change.

They tend to become engaged in compulsive and “co-dependent

compassion” and in taking on the problems of the world in a “serve-aholic”
-- “unsung hero(ine)” pattern. They then get burned out and resentfully
burned up about the lack of recognition and support in their lives. Now they
have finally reached the point where they are giving up and trying to put an
end to it all.

It is the result of their being the “family hoist” in a severely dysfunctional,

exploitative and self-immersed family.

224
CARPAL-TUNNEL SYNDROME (Painful nerve pain, numbing,
tingling/burning in the hands/ wrists, and wrist-weakening, due to
inflammation of the nerves in the wrist)

“Cope-ability anxiety.” They are handicapped by a sense of learned

helplessness and felt powerlessness in the face of the difficulties of the
world. They end up in a situation where they are afraid to manifest their
own potency, for fear of what might happen if they did.

There is a lot of anger and frustration at life’s seemingly injustices,

deprivations and degradations. It’s a “God is Al Capone” distrust of the
Universe reaction. They have the profound conviction that anything they
want will be taken away from them or that it will lead to punishment/ attack
of some sort.

It comes from being betrayed by the family in a “love is a poison apple”

type of situation, where the original “local representatives” of the “Home
Office” played havoc with their welfare, and they could do nothing about it.
They were subjected to a “look but don’t touch, much less take or partake”
formative process. (See WRIST PROBLEMS)

CAR SICKNESS

“Concentration camp.” They have an abiding fear of the world, along with a
sense of being trapped in bondage. It comes from an engulfing relationship
with their mother and/or with their family. There is a great deal of
subterranean and subconscious rage and attack that is happening in the
confines of a current “old homestead,” type of situation or that happened
back there.

CATALEPSY (Unable to move muscles)

“Immobilized.” They have an overwhelming fear and terror, a feeling of

utter helplessness. They feel that they are under attack from the Universe
and that nothing is trustworthy. They are mentally and/or emotionally
confused, they feel overwhelmed and inadequate, and they lack self-control
at this point.

225
They are in a thorough-going escape mode, and they are doing all they can
to avoid an unwanted task or experience and/or to escape a situation or
person. They are experiencing an intense resistance to life, people and
things, in a “super-stubbornness” reaction.

It is the result of having come up in an irrational and/or chaotic family in

which there was nothing they could do to change the course of events,
improve the situation, or provide themselves a better experience.

CATARACTS (Clouding of the eye lens)

“Walking the plank.” They are seeing a dark future ahead in which there is
no joy and no end in sight. They desperately want to control their future and
to impose their will, but they have learned that there is no way they can do
that.

As a result, they systematically seek to avoid looking at the future. There is

a real fear of what lies ahead for them, along with a lack of nourishment in
their experience. It is the result of a grimly dysfunctional family culture in
which there was no way out.

RIGHT EYE CATARACT

“Ostrich.” They are avoiding seeing what is coming up in their environment

and in the world around them.

LEFT EYE CATARACT

“I don’ wanna know me!” They have a fear of what is going on inside
themselves or of what is happening or of what is going to happen to them.

CATARRH OF THE EAR (Inflammation of the mucous membrane and the

hyper-section of the glands in the area)

“Feeling-avoidance.” There is an emotional suppression pattern in which

they try to avoid dealing with deep feelings that alarm them intensely. They
tend to react to things in a hyper-sensitive manner, and they are prone to
take a vaguely persecutory stance about things. Their approach tends to

226
emphasize closing off from and not wanting to hear the “bad news” of life,
especially around emotionally sensitive issues.

It is a pattern that got started in their denial-dominated dysfunctional family

in which all emotional matters tended to be “swept under the rug.” Yet,
there were a great many emotional commotional events constantly going
on. Everyone tended strongly to try to “fix the blame on Mame,” to hear no
evil, and to look the other way.

CAVITIES

“Now or never!” These represent multiple life issues that they haven’t been
able to handle and that must be handled now. They are having real trouble
discriminating what to let in and what not to allow in, and they are feeling
very vulnerable and intensely irritated. There is much suppressed anger,
frustrated resentment and emotional conflict involved here.

They had to “shove things under the rug” and to “put things off” when they
were coming up in their dysfunctional family, and it is now coming to roost.

CAVITIES IN CHILDREN

“Rotten nurturance.” There is much conflict about what they are receiving,
along with significant family problems to which the child is reacting with
anger and despair. They are getting “contaminated nourishment” for
whatever reason, and by whatever processes. (See TEETH PROBLEMS,
particularly in regard to the specific teeth involved)

CELIAC DISEASE (A genetically influenced allergy ailment where the

inside lining of the small intestine is damaged by gluten intake, often
leading to arthritis, fibromyalgia, multiple sclerosis, kidney disease, lupus,
hypothyroidism, osteoporosis, epilepsy, psychiatric problems, brain
disorders, attention deficit and other learning disorders, and over 130 other
severe disorders.)

“Assimilation problems.” They are having absorption difficulties and

problems in separating the wheat from the chaff, so to speak. They are
having problems with analysis and with processing things. They are being

227
hampered by distorted discrimination and disturbing distrust generated by a
dysfunctional family’s “magical mystery tour” pattern, and by their being
subjected to systematic invalidation then and ever since.

***************************************

“Self-worth issues.” They are experiencing excessive guilt, self-doubt and

self-image problems. They feel unappreciated and also unsure of their
capability and value. They need appreciation, love, and understanding of
the kind they never got as a child in their accusatorially invalidating family.

***************************************

“Forget this!” They are engaged in life-rejecting fertility-, creativity-,

productivity-and responsibility-avoidance, along with the denigration of the
feminine and of the sacred at a very deep level. It is the result of extremely
harsh and rejecting parenting at some level, especially from the mother.

CELLULITE (Pock mark-like indentations of the flesh of the thighs and

buttocks)

“Powerlessness-rage.” They are a “seething volcano” about their role in the

world as a “sex object,” a “plaything,” an “airhead,” a “secretary,” a
“mistress,” a “wife,” or whatever other patriarchal role they find themselves
“stuck in” and have been all their life, with no improvement in sight. They
are also prone to self-undermining and self-punishment, out of the belief
that they somehow deserve no better.

They are the product of a possessive, authoritarian, patriarchal and/or

dysfunctional family in which their femaleness and personal qualities
resulted in their being put in this exploitative, sex-ploitative and/or
oppressed role.

CELLULITIS (Inflammation under the skin)

“Blame-frame.” They are harboring a lot of stored anger and self-

punishment over past events. They are unable to forgive and forget or to

228
accept themselves, people and life. It got started in a severely blame-
throwing family. (See the parts of the body affected for more information)

CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM (“C.N.S.”) PROBLEMS

“What’s the point?” They have a profound ambivalence about being here,
and it is showing up in a disruption of the intention-application system.
They have had a life of disappointments, discombobulations and
disagreeable experiences, and they are now seriously questioning whether
to continue or not. It is the result of a severely dysfunctional family of
origin having imprinted and programmed them with self-disruptive patterns
of motivation and manifestation.

“CEREBRAL ALLERGY” (Loss of brain functions)

“God must be Al Capone!” They are feeling betrayed by the “Home Office”
(All That Is). It is due to conflicts between their personal goals and desires
and their Divine destiny, with a resulting disgust/distrust reaction that
makes them totally unwilling to let anything within their boundaries. They
feel that God has taken over their life, and they feel drained and over-
demanded.

They are reacting with great repressed rage and fear to all this, and they
have a deep distrust of the Universe. They have the feeling that they are
being asked to “do the impossible with nothing,” and they are
systematically denying their personal power and self-worth in response.
They are now staging a “sit down strike” by disrupting the “bio-
computer’s” functioning. There is much unexpressed grief about all this,
and they are “desperately seeking Susan” -- the nurturing maternal love
they never got as an infant.

CEREBRAL PALSY (Impaired functioning or paralysis due to congenital

nervous system problems)

“Stopped in their tracks.” They are getting stuck, due to paralyzing

thoughts. They are fixated on a particular mind-set, mental approach and
paradigmatic model. They want to “make things all right” out of a feeling

229
of having to be the one who is responsible for everything that happens.
They are extremely rigid in how they think that should be.

They have an intensely anxious relationship with the Universe that is full of
fear, uncertainty and insecurity. They are trapped in implication-terror at the
thought of things being different from what they imagine or of their having
to try a new approach to things. They are also full of guilt and rejection of
life, and they are not able to forgive others or themselves. They have a
“God will KILL me if I do anything different!” feeling.

It is the result of a very rigid adaptation to a severely dysfunctional and

frightening family who themselves manifested a very fearfully narrow
viewpoint and lifestyle. They played the role of the “family hoist” who was
the pivot point and support system of everything. Underneath it all, they
have a desperate need to unite their family in love and acceptance.

CEREBRO-VASCULAR ACCIDENT [“C.V.A.”] (See “STROKE”)

CERVIX PROBLEMS

“Self-suppression.” They feel that it is not safe for them to manifest their
creativity or their generativity. They fear rejection, abandonment and attack,
along with envy, jealousy and retaliation.

It comes from their experience in a patriarchal and dysfunctional family in

which the feminine and the creative were greatly feared and devalued.

************************************

“Self-belittling.” They are hassled with worries over not being good
enough, along with self-denigration and self-disgust. They don’t trust their
feminine receptivity, and they won’t surrender to themselves. They also
have a fear of sex and sexual desire, along with a fear of procreativity and
vulnerability. It is the result of an intrusively controlling, sex-ploitative and
“never good enough” withholding and judgmental father -- or a similar,
“animus-dominated” mother.

************************************

230
“Tripod-rage.” They are operating out of intense and irresistible impulse to
kick anything with three legs. It was generated originally by an equally
misanthropic mother. It was then re-validated by an abusive and sex-
ploitative father, along with a patriarchal culture.

CERVICAL CANCER

“Powerlessness feelings.” They feel overwhelmed and devastated. It is

connected with feelings of hopelessness, inadequacy and self-rejection.
They have disharmonious attitudes towards their personal potency -- they
don’t want to deal with it.

They have strong feelings of failure and incompetence, with little sense of
self-accomplishment. There is deep hurt and longstanding anger arising
from frustrated plans and felt blockages by other people or circumstances.
They were programmed to be exaggeratedly feminine, “cute,” powerless
and functionally dependent, so that they could never “grow away.”

*******************************

“Fuck you all!” They are carrying deep-seated hatreds of the world around
them and of the people in it. They also feel very resentful of their being a
woman, of the patriarchy, and of the masculine, but they repress awareness
of this.

They feel that they are in a rotten situation and always have been. They hate
it, and they see no way out of it. They are afraid to express their rage about
it or to find an outlet for their creative energy. It is the result of a sex-
ploitative and intensely possessive misanthropic mother and a distant,
absent, sex-ploitative and/or abusive father in a dysfunctional family who
relied on them intensely.

CESAREAN SECTION BIRTH

“Imprinting-minimization.” The dual process of not being allowed to come

through the birth canal and the resulting abrupt transition from the womb to
self-sustaining produces both a sense of not being “grounded” here and a
rather pronounced self-containment, self-determination and influence-

231
deflection pattern. The effect of it is to prevent the passing on of seven
generations of neurotic patterns by preventing their coming down the birth
canal where the imprinting occurs.

The purpose(s) depend on the nature of the destiny chosen by their soul. In
general, the purposes break into either cosmic consequences in the form of
learning from the resulting profound sense of isolation on the one hand, or
of becoming more attuned to one’s own drummer and that of the Universe
than is usual, so as to bring new forms, ideas and resources to the world, on
the other.

**************************************

“I’m not so damned sure I want this individual to be here!” There is intense
ambivalence about giving birth, about giving birth in these times and
circumstances, or about giving birth to this individual on the part of the
mother. So she seeks an unconscious compromise that ends up with this
“tight-lipped” barrier that forces another “out route.”

It is the result of an engulfing and enmeshed relationship with the mother,

who conveyed that she was not to bond with anyone else.

CESSATION OF OVULATION (Premature)

“Destiny-protection.” They have work to do in this life that does not permit
the limitations and demands of motherhood.

************************************

“Femininity-rejection.” They deeply resent being a woman, and they want

to terminate the marker of womanhood. They are the product of a
patriarchal family.

************************************

“Peter Panella.” They are an “eternal girl” who wants no part of adult
responsibility. It is the result of possessive and maturity-preventing
parenting.

232
 ************************************

“Self-rejection.” They are so disgusted with themselves that they can’t

allow the possibility of “passing it on,” and they therefore cease the
process. They come from a severely rejecting and/or neglectful family.

************************************

“Refusal to mother.” They want no part of motherhood, period. They are

repelled by their mother’s example and/or life history.

************************************

“Mother-rejection.” They are so angry at their mother that they deny her the
possibility of grandmother hood. It comes from any number of negative
mothering and/or devastating childhood experiences for which they blame
their mother.

CHAFING (Friction-caused irritations and burns)

“Burr under their saddle.” They are experiencing a sense of being

chronically and consistently irritated and “rubbed the wrong way” by things
in their life. They come from a “one damned thing after another”
dysfunctional family system in which they were powerless to change
anything.

CHAGAS’ DISEASE (Sudden fatal heart failure, due to a single cell

parasite)

“Alone on their own.” They were a “sealed unit” and a “self-made person”
who was intensely self-contained and self-sustaining all their life, due to
severe early emotional deprivation. They decided not to take it lying down,
and they had hands on control of everything in their life because they
couldn’t count on anyone else to cover the bases for them. Finally, it
resulted in a collapse of their heart, due to lack of love.

CHAMEROID (Painful dime-sized ulcers on the penis or clitoris)

233
“Worthlessness feelings.” They are suffering from feelings of inferiority,
low self-esteem, ostracism and obstruction. They are ashamed of
themselves, and they are troubled by their unlovely thoughts about other
people that have arisen out of their life history. To make matters worse, they
have strong longings which can’t be realized at present.

At the base of all this is a conflict between their desire for affection and
their fear of being hurt if it is sought. There is also a felt need for
punishment arising out of sexual guilt. They have a lot of anxiety and fear
from old, buried “yucky stuff,” including from past lives.

They have the gut-level belief that the genitals are sinful or dirty, due to a
sexually suppressive and shame-inducing and yet simultaneously
“tantalizing tarantula” seductive-destructive sex-ploitative dysfunctional
family.

“CHAPPED LIPS”

“A slip of the lip can sink a ship.” The chapped lips are the result of
withheld positive expressions or of feedback from over-expressively
divulged secrets and gossip. It’s a good example of, “If you can’t say
something constructive, don’t say anything at all” and “One positive
contribution is worth ten negative comments.” They are the product of a
negative assumptive and suppressive family who were quite punitive about
expressivity.

CHARLES BONNET SYNDROME (C.B.S.) [Non-psychotic

hallucinations caused by impaired vision sensory deprivation effects]

“I’m lonely.” They are prone to being emotionally and/or socially isolated.
They don’t trust the world enough to form sufficient meaningful
relationships and emotional contact/support/enrichment environment. They
come from an untrustworthy early family environment.

“CHARLIE HORSE” [Sudden or prolonged muscle cramp in the leg] (See

CRAMPS -- MUSCLE)

CHEEK PROBLEMS

234
“I suck!” They are suffering from free-floating shame about who and what
they are. They are also having conflicts and concerns about self-expression
and emotional reactivity. It was generated by a denigrating and wrong-
making family who were alarmed by who they were.

RIGHT CHEEK PROBLEM

“Self-questioning.” They have issues about how they react to events and
environments.

LEFT CHEEK PROBLEM

“Mixed motives.” They have conflicts about their expression of their

internal states -- their feelings, needs and intentions.

CHEEKBONE PROBLEMS

“Potency problems.” They are experiencing conflicts, self-distrust and guilt

about their personal and political power. They feel like a fraud, and they
fear that they’ll abuse their power, or that they don’t deserve to have it. This
arose out of a family who were alarmed by their personal potency, and who
made them wrong for having it.

RIGHT CHEEKBONE PROBLEMS

“Dare I have it?” They are having conflicts about their capacity for
leadership and public power.

LEFT CHEEKBONE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” There are issues regarding their relationship to their

personal potency.

CHEMICAL POISONING

“Polluted environment.” They are being invaded and permeated by

damaging influences in their surroundings. They are being subjected to
intolerable inputs and experiences. It is a repetition of their early
environment, where their dysfunctional family imposed a poisonous

235
atmosphere and contaminated support systems. It is a message to them to
the effect of “Don’t pollute yourself any more!”

CHEMOTHERAPY REACTION (Nausea, vomiting, itching, loss of hair,

etc.)

“Unfit for human consumption.” Bottom line, they feel that they somehow
really blew it in life that they didn’t measure up. They have a feeling of
powerlessness, helplessness and hopelessness, along with competence-and
cope-ability-anxiety.

They are also having an intense self-distrust and self-disgust reaction, a

severe sense of guilt and shame -- “I should have…” They feel personally
accountable for everything that happens. They are now trying to “make up
for it all” and to “atone” by self-punishment and passion-repudiation.

There is also a return to their infancy, where they have re-encountered their
unmet dependency needs and the severe abandonment-annihilation-anxiety
that originally arose from maternal deprivation. They are the product of a
role-reversing and perfectionistic expectations family who depended on
them for everything, and allowed them almost no latitude for selfhood.

*************************************

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are manifesting their
disgust, dread and moral outrage about what is happening to them -- they
are totally rejecting it. They feel that it is the ultimate capstone of a life that
has really sucked. They are full of resentment-rage at their life and their
circumstances, but they have never felt the right or capability of doing
anything about it.

They grew up in a demoralizingly and implacably dysfunctional family that

put them in a position of being the helpless victim of the process.

CHEST COLD

“Deprivation-despair.” They are experiencing an intense increase of their

sense of emotional isolation and of the resulting abandonment-depression.

236
They feel “unfit for human consumption,” and they feel that they have to
constantly suppress their self-manifestation and self-expression. It is, in
effect, a “mini-broken heart” reaction. It is the result of an exploitative,
rejecting, neglectful and/or sexualizing parenting pattern.

CHEST PROBLEMS

“Identity-irritation.” They are engaged in systematic self-suppression or

self-avoidance and self-rejection. It is a rejection-expecting self-encasement
reaction. They were simply never allowed to be themselves in their
convenience-concerned and rejecting family.

*************************************

“Emotional suppression.” They have a strong fear of expressing, focusing,

translating and amplifying their feelings, leading to systematic feeling-
avoidance. They feel the need to put on a good front. They come from a
family in which appearances and social standing were intensely important.

*************************************

“Broken hearted.” A great deal of sadness and sentimental sorrow are

stored here. There is an inability to form intimate connections and
relationships, to manifest or express love, or to receive nurturance, due to
their fear of being real about their hurt heart.

There was a good deal of early sexual repression and/or sex-ploitative

trauma in which too much nurturance and adult responsibility were required
of them, and in which the parent-child relationship and their personal
boundaries were violated.

*************************************

“Abusive usage.” There is deep resentment over the excessive role

expectations and invasive exploitation. They are the product of an over-
requiring, boundary-violating and supremely self-immersed family.
Unfortunately, due to the “trying to put a new ending on the old story”
effect, they tend to reproduce that situation presently.

237
RIGHT CHEST PROBLEM

“How do I do it right?” They have conflicts over their preferred methods,

forms and recipients of their love/nurturance/sexuality-expression.

LEFT CHEST PROBLEM

“What do I want/need?” They are having difficulties in regards to their

preferred sources of love/nurturance/sexuality. There are deep issues
regarding deservingness of love and caring.

“CHICKEN POX”

“Regimentation blues.” They are experiencing restriction-resentment and

simultaneous guilt, abandonment-anxiety, and self-disgust about their
violations of the rules and regulations. They are also concerned about their
resentment of the suppressive environment around them.

They are the product of an authoritarian patriarchal household in which

there was an undercurrent of collusion from the mother.

************************************

“Waiting for the other shoe to drop.” They are manifesting a “generalized
dread” response. They have a lot of fear and tension, as they anticipate
disaster. It results in their being hyper-sensitive, in the “finding the cat is
stomping loudly” fashion. It comes from their having been buffeted about
helplessly by the self-destructive lifestyle of their dysfunctional family.

“CHILBLAINS” (Painful swelling of fingers and toes caused by extreme

cold)

“Et tu, Brute?” They are feeling betrayed and sabotaged by those who are
close to them or who are in positions of influence over their situation. It
comes from never knowing when this would happen in their family. (See
the particular extremities affected for more information)

CHILDBIRTH COMPLICATIONS

238
“I’m not so sure I want to be here.” The individual is experiencing
ambivalence and/or fear about coming into the world at this time, with these
parents, and/or under these conditions. It’s an “I bit off more than I can
chew!” moment-of-truth reaction.

***************************************

“I’m not so sure I want this.” There is ambivalence and/or fear about having
a child (or this child) under these conditions. It is often due to a non-
supportive early life and “unwelcome wagon” reception at their own birth.

“CAUL BIRTH” (Born with amniotic sac over their head -- often still full
of fluid)

“Eased in.” By coming down the canal in this way, they were spared much
of the stress and strain of the birth process. It indicates that they are not to
have many of the usual trials and tribulations -- at least at the beginning. It
is a destiny design situation.

*********************************

“Get back to where you once belonged!” They are at best highly ambivalent
about having a child or about having this child, and they in effect want the
child to go back to where they came from, at some level.

It is in part a situation of doing unto others what was done unto them, and in
part an issue about responsibility, envy, self-hatred and/or rejection of this
individual arising from their formative history.

CORD AROUND THE NECK (At birth)

“What are YOU doing here!?” It reflects at least an extremely intense

ambivalence about having a child, or about having this child. There is a
considerable resistance and resentment concerning the child’s coming into
her life.

This may reflect a situational matter and/or a deep-seated personality

pattern around rage, resentment, resistance and/or refusal of responsibility.

239
In the most severe situation, it represents homicidal hostility towards the
child on the mother’s part, due to an extremely rejecting intrauterine and
first year of life in her own childhood, along with massively destructive
subsequent developmental devastations.

DIFFICULT CHILDBIRTH

“Harm-alarmed.” They have ambivalence and/or fear about having a child

or this child under these conditions. It is often due to an early non-
supportive early live and an “unwelcome wagon” reception at their own
birth.

*************************************

“I’m afraid I can’t do it!” They have ambivalence and/or fear about coming
into the world at this time, with these parents, or under these conditions. It’s
an “I bit off more than I can chew!” moment-of-truth reaction by their soul.

“DRY BIRTH” (Due to prematurely breaking waters)

“Kicking them out.” They are intensely ambivalent about or actively

rejecting of having a child or of having this child. They want it to be over
and done with. It is the result of having been similarly reacted to as an
infant.

*************************************

“Alone on my own.” They feel thrust into the world without a safety net,
and they are all they’ve got, and “One strike and I’m out!” They have felt
no sense of protection from conception on, and this process is setting the
pattern as an anchor experience of a rather major magnitude.

It is the result of ambivalent, rejecting or impatient maternal attitudes that

have resulted in the abrupt commencement of their life. On the soul level, it
reflects an intention to derive maximal learning from self-generated
experiences and from a sense of separation, isolation and deprivation.

“FACE DOWN” PRESENTATION (During birth)

240
“I’m not so sure I want to come out yet!” They are reluctant to enter their
destiny requirements, preferring the comfort of the womb. They are having
“foot-dragging” reactions to their intended purposes and processes.
However, it is a preferential ambivalence, not a dread or refusal process. It
reflects a rather demanding and/or portentous destiny.

“FOOTLING-BREECH” BIRTH (Foot out first, then breech)

“What the hell are you doing here!?” There is a severe degree of at best
ambivalence, and at worst out-and-out hostility on the part of the mother
about the arrival of this child, often accompanied by massive denial of its
existence for as long as possible.

She has intense ambivalence about giving birth, about giving birth in these
times and circumstances, and/or about giving birth to this individual. So she
seeks an unconscious compromise that ends up with this “bass-ackwards”
presentation.

*************************************

“I’m not so damned sure I want to be here!” They have intense ambivalence
about entering the physical plane per se, about entering in these times,
and/or about entering into this family environment. They intensely resistant
to coming in, partially in reaction to the mother’s response, and partially as
a function of profound ambivalence of its own about being here or coming
into this family and the resulting destiny.

While their soul was aware of the parameters and processes that would be
involved, and it chose to have this experience, the emerging ego is not sure
it can handle what is coming. They do also not really want to leave either.
So they seek to delay or soften the confrontation with the realities of the
situation.

FORCEPS DELIVERY (At birth)

“Oh yes you will!” They were intensely resistant to coming in here, with
the result that they experienced being dragged into the world kicking and
screaming, perhaps with brain damage.

241
It became the prototype of their life experience. It comes from their being
conceived into what is experienced as a severely negative womb and family
environment, as a function of destiny design.

***********************************

“Hell, no, I won’t let go!” The mother was having considerable
ambivalence or resistance to the entrance of this individual into her life. It
may mark past life karma issues and/or it may represent great unhappiness
and rejection of motherhood, due to situational and/or personal issues.

FORCEPS DELIVERY DAMAGE

“Proof positive!” They were at some deep level highly fearful and resistive
to coming in this time, with the anticipating of intensely harmful events as
their lot in life. In true self-fulfilling prophecy and destiny/karma-play-out
fashion, they have indeed commenced with a harmful handicap.

There is also the probability that the mother was selected to be a part-and-
parcel of the destiny-play-out, and that therefore she, too, was highly
resistive to the entrance of this individual and/or that she at some overt or
covert level actively wishes harm to this individual, perhaps from a karmic
relationship, as well as from personal problems and pregnancy
circumstances/history issues.

PROLONGED BIRTH PROCESS

“Here’s another fine mess I’ve gotten myself into!” There is some form of
intense resistance to their “coming out.” They have reasons to believe they
will have some rather traumatic times along the way. It is the result of
intrauterine difficulties and/or of destiny design.

***********************************

“Oh no you don’t!” The mother is at some level determined that she will not
have to deal with having this child or a child in her life. It is due to some
form of deep-seated resistance to being a mother that arose from being
programmed to reject motherhood or from bad mothering.

242
“STILLBIRTH”

“Not do-able.” The soul changed its mind at the last minute or towards the
end of the pregnancy.

***********************************

“That’s enough.” All the soul wanted was to be in the pregnancy period
with this mother.

***********************************

“On second thought...” The soul decided that this family would be
irrelevant for its purposes, once it had enough time and experience to
evaluate it first hand.

***********************************

“Too much to handle.” It was too much to handle for the soul and/or the
fetus as a function of stress-overwhelm and/or a severe rejection reaction
from the mother.

“TWIN DEATH” (Loss of their twin in the womb or at birth)

“Change of plans.” The soul involved found the circumstances they actually
encountered are not compatible with its intentions.

***************************************

“That’s enough.” The intention was to stay only for the partial gestation for
its own experience and/or for the surviving twin’s experience.

***************************************

“Learn your lessons!” The issue of the lost twin was chosen by the
surviving twin’s soul as a life experience to provide needed learnings for
their soul.

CHILDBIRTH DAMAGE TO THE MOTHER

243
“I don’t think I can do this.” There is severe resistance to having this child
enter her life and her responsibility. She is thoroughly frightened, guilty,
resentful and/or grief-stricken about this eventuality. It arises from a deep-
seated sense of not having what it takes to make it with this individual.

That, in turn, is a function of subconscious recognition of what will be

entailed, along with awareness of how their own early experiences have
limited their ability to handle this situation. They were not well-received as
a child, and they don’t know how to overcome that foundational restriction
in order to handle the demands of this situation.

****************************************

“WHY did I DO this!?” There is intense resistance and/or resentment of

having to come into this situation by the individual being born. They are
aware, on the basis of their intrauterine experience and their soul’s
knowledge, of what is likely to be involved in their formative process and
its aftermath, and they are highly alarmed and self-protective about it all.

CHILDHOOD DISEASES

“Who’s the parent here?” There is childish behavior by the adults going on
around them, resulting in the individual’s feeling unprotected and
vulnerable to invasive influences. In particular, the child is likely to be
responding to their mother’s situation, feelings, and disrupted functioning.
There is an experience of being helpless to cope with their situation, and it
indicates that their emotional needs are not being met.

They feel like they and their needs are being relegated to the back burner,
and that they are being pushed aside by their family (mother in particular).
It undermines their immune system and their ability to take care of
themselves.

It arises when the adults are more concerned about their own immediate
comforts and convenience than they are about the welfare of the child, or
when they operate with beliefs that teach the child that the child or they
don’t have what it takes for the child to be perfectly safe and healthy.

244
“CHILLS”

“Freak-freeze.” They have a fear of the world, leading to a “Leave me

alone!” pulling away and within, with a desire to retreat and with a mental
contraction. It is the result of untrustworthy parenting. They had to
excessively protect and take care of themselves as a child.

CHIN PROBLEMS

“Consequence-anxiety.” They have feelings of inferiority and inability to

take on the world on its own terms. There is a pronounced tendency to
expression-suppression, due to fear of the dire outcomes that might accrue.
They won’t stick their chin out. It arose in a family in which it was made
crystal clear that it is quite dangerous for them to take a stand on anything.

RIGHT CHIN PROBLEM

“Potency problems.” They were heavily curtailed in their expression of

their personal power, and they don’t know how to handle it now.

CENTER CHIN PROBLEM

“Self-suppression.” They fear disaster if they make their position or

preferences known.

LEFT CHIN PROBLEM

“Not allowed!” There is shame and/or guilt about having personal potency,
and about having wants, needs, desires and a will.

TIP OF THE CHIN PROBLEM

“Sitting on it.” They are engaging in suppression of critical thoughts,

observations and feelings out of anticipation of destruction.

UNDERSIDE OF THE CHIN PROBLEM

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have conflicts about the expression of their

capacities, for fear of the ecological impacts and reactions that might

245
accrue. They tend to “keep their candle under a basket” and to be fearful of
“coming out.” Current circumstances are moving them towards “letting fly
with it,” and they are agitated and concerned.

CHLOASMA (Brown patches on the skin, not uncommon in pregnant

women)

“Going through it again.” They are immersed in over-involvement and

emotional commotion of an enmeshed and co-dependent nature. They are
looking for the nurturance they never got. It is the result of a self-immersed
or in other ways non-available dysfunctional and emotional-commotional
family.

The frequent co-presence of pregnancy with this phenomenon is reflective

of the developmental recapitulation that we go through when we raise
children. We re-experience what happened to us at the same stage all the
way along.

CHOKING

“Moral cretin.” They are “choking to death” on their own guilt and shame,
with the feeling that they should be thoroughly punished or even destroyed
for their “sins.” It comes from a severely accusatory, blame-throwing,
moralistic and punitive family.

CHOKING ON FOOD OR DRINK (Due to its going down the wrong tube)

“Attempted diversion.” They are being upset by whatever is going down in

their mind, in the environment, or in the conversation, and they are trying to
prevent its continuance. They are trying not to swallow what is happening.
They grew up in a highly dysfunctional household in which they were
continuously forced to take in many unsavory things.

******************************

“Overwhelmed.” They feel that life’s demands are getting to be too much
for them, and that their circumstances are more than they can handle at

246
present. It is a re-appearance of an experience that once was the “warp and
woof” of their life.

They are the product of a pessimistic and disgusted parenting pattern in

which there was a lot of guilt-induction for being such a burden.

******************************

“Maybe I should leave.” They are experiencing a resurgence of very early

self-rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong-
making, and rejecting maternal parenting.

CHOKING SENSATIONS

“Force-fed.” They are feeling forced to swallow ideas without being able to
analyze them. It is a situation that reproduces a pattern that happened a lot
when they were a child.

CHOKING TO DEATH ON FOOD OR DRINK

“Time to leave.” They had the feeling that they had completed what they
could do here, and they felt they had nothing more to do -- so they left. It
was a destiny completion reaction.

*******************************

“I should leave.” They were experiencing a resurgence of very early self-

rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong
making, and rejecting maternal parenting, only this time they decided she
was right, and they took the ultimate step.

*******************************

“I can’t keep up.” They felt utterly overwhelmed by life and by their
circumstances, and they had the feeling that there is no way in which they
could meet the demands being made of them or in which they could realize
their destiny, due to circumstances beyond their control.

247
It was a re-appearance of an experience that once was the “warp and woof”
of their life, but it reached the point where they feel they simply didn’t have
what it takes to make it and/or that there was simply no point in continuing.
They were the product of a highly nihilistic and pessimistic parenting
pattern.

*******************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

CHOLERA (Intestinal disease -- often fatal)

“Off-the-wall attacks.” They fear being struck down and/or attacked from
any quarter in an unpredictable and unpreventable manner. It is a feeling of
being in a pervasively hostile environment which arose in a family where
they were treated and regarded as the “intimate enemy.”

CHOLESTEROL PROBLEMS

“Sydney Sobersides” -- “Grit and bear it” orientation. Life to them is one
long problem to be solved and it is very serious business, indeed. They have
the distinct impression that joy is evil, and that they are not supposed to be
happy or content.

They are afraid that “God will strike them dead” if they accept joy and
happiness in their life. They therefore have a tendency to be something of a
“gloom-and- doom-sayer” or of a “militaristic martinet.”

They may also tend to compensate with a superficial, self-indulgent,

comfort-concerned, and luxury-loving lifestyle in a “live now, pay later” (if
ever) pattern. It arises from a “there is no joy in Bloodville” type of
dysfunctional family, where they had to maintain sanity and deflect disaster,
at the expense of any form of enjoyment.

248
CHOREA (Involuntary movements due to central nervous system disease)

“Vast wasteland.” They have had a severe sense of deprivation and

degradation all their life. It results in a “self-fulfilling prophecy effect”
driving away of those who might support and love them. It got started in a
severely rejecting family, and they took it all personally, so that underlying
this is a basic assumption that they and everybody else are no dammed
good. (See HUNTINGTON’S CHOREA)

CHRONIC DISEASE

“Hell no, I won’t grow!” They are manifesting a refusal to change and
expand, arising out of a fear of the future. They don’t feel safe in the world,
they don’t trust the processes of the world and they operate out of
catastrophic expectations. They would rather stick with the unpleasant
present than to take a chance on the unknown future.

It comes from a “Leave well enough alone!” attitude inducing severely

dysfunctional family system in which any intervention or change was very
likely to make things considerably worse than they already were.

CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME; CHRONIC FATIGUE IMMUNE

DYSFUNCTION SYNDROME; C.F.I.D.S. (Exhaustion and irritability that
can lead to gland problems, meningitis, and immune system breakdown)

“Crushed talent.” They are undergoing unfulfilled giftedness-suppression,

resulting in severe despair-rage, along with emotional commotional
episodes of almost psychotic-seeming proportions, and utter exhaustion
comparable to Epstein-Barr.

They also find themselves being “used” by their gifts, in the form of
uncontrollable outbursts and breakouts of their talents in a non-functional
and often highly detrimental manner. In addition, they also go into
experiences and expressions of intense mental and emotional distress and
distortion that are extremely alarming and alienating. They feel possessed
by these explosions, and they become quite “run amok-anxious” about it all.
In addition, they often are possessed by their family, by institutions and/or
by spouse figures.

249
They are the product of extremely possessive and oppressive parenting that
got started intrauterine. They were forbidden and prevented from doing
their own thing and/or from developing their own capabilities, identity and
destiny. They were instead forced into playing out their parent(s) (usually
the father’s) unexpressed destiny.

*************************************

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.
They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-
exhaustion.

They have lost their sense of purpose and direction, of the desire for life,
and the wind has gone out of their sails. They have developed a deep fear of
life, of taking further responsibility, and of coping with any further
demands. The illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat from
confrontation and action. They are the product of perfectionistic parenting.

*************************************

“Overwhelmed.” They are into a hapless-helpless-hopeless victimization

experience. There is an inability to self-nurture, self-appreciate and self-
soothe. As a result of all this, they can sometimes end up being care-
coercing of the environment, in a very belated attempt to get the
fundamental nurturing they never received. In general, they compulsively
seek to minimize further damage, and to try to earn some semblance of
acceptance.

The family was highly authoritarian, non-supportive and repressive-

suppressive from the beginning. Often there was also physical and sexual
abuse, along with the intense emotional abuse and deprivation. They were
subjected to highly conditional, demanding and self-immersed parenting,
and “there was no joy in Bloodville.” The whole pattern could be
summarized in the phrase, “It’s not allowed!”

*************************************

250
“I stink!” There is a programmed self-rejection that has resulted in a “belly
up” of the immune system. It in effect works against them, as if they were
allergic to themselves and to the world.

They were placed in the “family hoist” position of over-responsibility, and

they were targeted with the attributed accountability for everything that
went wrong in the family -- as if it was a motivated let down betrayal or a
personal failure on their part.

This came about as a function of their being a gifted child living in a

dysfunctional family who expected them to be able to handle all the
family’s problems. They played the “hero(ine)” role in the family, and they
turned into a work-aholic -- achieve-aholic contribution-freak. They
operated in a chronic flight-fight system arousal in childhood, in a context
of continual rejection, blame-throwing, and impossible demands.

They became very accomplished and independent, with perfectionistic

standards around worth-earning arising from unpleasable parenting -- they
could never, ever measure up. They ended up validation-starved as a result.

*************************************

“Hands on rescue efforts.” They have a huge control trip that doesn’t work
that arises because they have no sense of their personal worth or value.
They have no sense of entitlement, along with a tremendous over-
responsibility pattern about “saving” others as their justification for
existence.

There is a severe “family betrayal” delusion and a guilt-grabbing

propensity, due to their being told in effect that they caused World War II. It
was a “Cinderella/Cinderfella syndrome” where, due to their gifts, they
actually tried to “go for the gold ring” of healing their family.

There was little nurturance, compassion or protection in infancy, which

resulted in very heavy self-numbing and frantic-fanatic efforting to “make
up for what they have caused.” They were, in effect, abandoned at an early
age by expectations of perfection and miracles.

251
In the meantime, the family was severely exploitative and betraying, as they
overwhelmingly expected of and over-utilized them. No one taught them
self-care or self-soothing in their first year of life. They were expected to
care for the parents instead. They are now collapsing, out of a sense of non-
deservingness and from having run out of inner resources to pull of the
“rabbit in the hat” trick any more.

CHRONIC OBSTRUCTIVE PULMONARY DISEASE (C.O.P.D.)

[Blockage of alveoli in the lungs]

“Where’s the EXIT?” They feel unworthy of taking up space and requiring
resources, and they are seriously considering “checking out” as a result.
When they are vulnerable or when they are under stress, the world is
decidedly not a safe place, in their experience. They fear taking in life
because “God will strike them dead.”

It is the result of intense intrauterine and subsequent rejection and trauma.

Their mother did not want them, and they got that message loud and clear
from what they thought was the “Home Office.” The outcome is existential
guilt resulting in self-deprivation based on severe self-rejection, of
potentially lethal proportions.

RIGHT LUNG C.O.P.D.

“Blast from the past.” They are struggling with guilt about their actions and
their environmental impacts.

LEFT LUNG C.O.P.D.

“Moral monster.” They have deep-seated shame about who they are -- their
inner values, motivations and intentions.

CHRONIC REVERSED POLARITY (Of the body’s magnetic field,

resulting in cognition problems, distractibility, inattention, impulsivity,
hyperactivity, etc.)

“Self-alienation.” They feel somehow responsible for all the ills of the
world, and that they are the cause. They have “carried the world on their

252
shoulders” all their life, starting with their highly stressful dysfunctional
family.

They were in effect told that they were the source of all their family’s
problems, while they were actually the only one who was deflecting some
of the disasters. They are an emotionally sensitive soul who was in effect
overwhelmed by their super-stressed out family.

CIRCULATION PROBLEMS

“Emotional suppression.” They feel that they dare not experience or express
feelings such as joy, love and fascination, and that it is not right or safe to
feel their feelings. They have a low interest in life, and they are feeling no
reason to go on. It arises from a sense of separation from the “Source,” and
of abandonment by the “Home Office.” Their experience is that “there is no
joy in Bloodville,” and that joy, pleasure, and love are non-existent.

They have little capacity for hope or forgiveness or to feel and express the
emotions in positive ways. So they take an observing rather than a
participatory role, and they are distantiated and disengaged from life. It is
the result of an “abandonment at an early age” experience in which they
have had to fend for themselves in what has been an indifferent world from
very early on.

*************************************

“Dreary destiny.” They feel that they are overburdened with responsibilities
and requirements in a non-fulfilling life. They have the experience of being
caught in a job they hate that they can’t let go of or quit.

They have the feeling that they have to “prove themselves,” but they
haven’t the foggiest notion how, really. They are intensely tense and deeply
discouraged with their whole life.

They got started in this pattern in a family in which they had to take on
responsibilities and roles for which they were ill-equipped, and which were
exploitative and competence-development undermining in their nature. (See
the body parts affected for more information)

253
BAD CIRCULATION IN THE EXTREMITIES

“Connection-prevention.” They are engaged in withdrawing of

involvement, vulnerability and expression of love. They are refusing to
meet other people.

“CLEARING THEIR THROAT” (Repeatedly)

“Fear-clears.” There is a rather intense anxiousness about the reception of

what is being said or about its ultimate impacts and implications. It arises
from a history of disapproval and wrong-making, often with high stakes
involved.

CLENCHED FISTS, CHRONIC

“Red alert.” They are engaged in continuous alarmed self-defensiveness.

They live in a virulent and violent world, and they have to be vigilantly “on
their toes” on guard at all times. They are so intensely immersed in this
scenario that they are incapable of giving. Other people are more potential
enemies than anything else.

They are the product of a significantly paranoid family who treated them as
the “intimate enemy,” and who taught them that everyone outside the
family was even worse.

RIGHT FIST CLENCHED

“On guard.” They are ever on the ready to fend off attack from the
environment.

LEFT FIST CLENCHED

“Self-suppression.” They are constantly controlling themselves and their

intense impulses to strike out.

CLITORIS PROBLEMS

“Peter Panella.” She is engaged in “eternal girl” continuous power,

responsibility and accountability-avoidance. She is afraid and ashamed of

254
her personal strength, exuberance and capacity for ecstasy. She doesn’t
know how to celebrate her erotic, esthetic and creative capacities.

It is the result of symbiotic engulfing dependency from her mother, on the

one hand, and of alarmed rejection of their feminine potency by their father,
on the other. She ended up rejecting her womanhood and
sexuality/creativity in return for acceptance and acceptability.

It was too much of a price to pay, and they can no longer deny their rightful
impact-making and legacy-leaving role.

“CLUSTER HEADACHES” (They occur in clusters)

“Yellow alert.” They have a disturbed mental condition, due to a

subconscious shock or to a chronic state of guarded vigilance that has been
“emergency preparation” activated by current circumstances. They labor
under a great deal of guilt and fear over imagined failures and their
consequences, arising from their having been the “sane one” in a
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Red-orange alert.” They are on intense vigilance, with “hair-trigger”

reactivity. They don’t dare to relax because they don’t trust the process of
life. They have a “Stop the world!” feeling, blocking the flow of life and of
their process, as a distraction or an escape operation. They are trying not to
experience what is happening at this time. It is reflective of a deep distrust
of the Universe that was generated by untrustworthy mothering.

*************************************

“Out of synch.” Their “internal clock” is in effect at odds with the world,
resulting in their being either awake at night and sleepy during the day, or
disorganized in their sleep need, or changeable in their sleep pattern.

There is much resentment-rumination and many angry thoughts about why

they are angry, while not doing anything about it. They also have a lot of
anxiety about things that aren’t handled, including their anger. Some

255
circumstance, relationship, situation, issue, pressure, individual or whatever
that they dislike intensely but which they feel they have to put up with, to
live with, is really bugging them. They have a strong habit of generating
such situations and of negativity and resentment.

It comes from having been in a dysfunctional family in which much that

was frustrating and insoluble occurred, in which unusual life schedules
and/or disrupted internal rhythms were generated by their dysfunctional
family lifestyle, and in which they were made to feel accountable and
responsible for it all as a child. (See HEADACHES; COLDNESS
HEADACHES; MIGRAINE HEADACHES) [Also, see the area(s) of the
headaches for more information]

COLD EXTREMITIES, CHRONIC

“Sealed off.” They have a good deal of vulnerability-resentment and

reachability-avoidance. They are an “urban hermit” contact-disliking
people-avoider who is reticent with strangers and a poor circulator who
tends to agoraphobia (the fear of going out of their home).

They are rejection-paranoid, and they are retreating into their core. They
feel rejected and not understood, and that any reaching out to touch
someone would result in rebuff or worse reactions. They feel like an “ugly
duckling” who elicits rejection everywhere they go.

It all got started when their parents punished and rejected them for being
different and formidable, because they were frightened by the individual’s
potency.

*************************************

“Lost in confusion.” They feel cut off from understanding their life
circumstances or their direction, in a learned helplessness situation and
reaction. Their family was a chaotic, repressive and power-preventing
dysfunctional system.

The individual felt no recourse, and, at the same time, they deeply resented
the treatment they were getting. They want to hit or strangle someone as a

256
result, and they want to take any sort of hostile physical action against
them.

They don’t want others to know how they feel, so they get “cold feet.”
Ultimately, however, they took it all to heart, and they have sadly settled
into a resignation apathy, as an overlay on their intense desire to strike out.

COLD EARS, CHRONIC

“Awareness-avoidance.” They are avoiding tuning into what is really going

on in their life and in the world around them.

COLD FEET, CHRONIC

“Commitment-avoidance.” They don’t want to move forward and prove that

they don’t have the wherewithal to stand on their own two feet to deliver
the goods. They take a conservative not-making-a-move approach.

RIGHT FOOT CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Forget it!” They do not want support from others or from the environment,
out of a deep distrust.

LEFT FOOT CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Disaster-deflection.” They are systematically vulnerability-avoidance and

involvement-deflecting, in order to prevent their engaging in mayhem, they
fear.

COLD FINGERS, CHRONIC

“Destiny-implementation avoidance.” They feel that they are overburdened

with dreary responsibilities and/or they feel overwhelmed by life’s
demands. They were either effectively ignored or engulfed and competence
undermined by their self-involved family.

COLD HANDS, CHRONIC

257
“Backed off.” They are systematically disengaging themselves from the
world around them. They find that being involved and vulnerable leads to
too many untoward consequences. They are the product of a severely
dysfunctional, non-supportive and perhaps untrustworthy family, from
whom they originally backed off.

RIGHT HAND CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Involvement-avoidance.” They are avoiding contact with the world for

fear of what it would do to them.

LEFT HAND CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have a deep fear of their own hostile impulses
and what they would do to the world.

COLD NOSE, CHRONIC

“Potency-distrust.” They are afraid of their personal potency and its

potential consequences for them and for the ecology.

COLD TOES, CHRONIC

“Destiny-implementation difficulties.” They are essentially ungrounded

and/or amotivational regarding carrying out the details of their destiny.
They in effect feel that they don’t have the wherewithal to pull off the job of
doing what is necessary to take on their destiny requirements. It is the result
of insufficient support and preparation for life by their intensely selfish
family.

COLD EXTREMITIES, TEMPORARY

“Pulling in.” They are manifesting shyness, withdrawal and contact-

avoidance that arises out of their fear of their resentment and anger, with a
resulting retreat into their core to avoid acting it out.

They learned in their family that anger is bad and that acting it out only
made matters far worse. Their shyness represents guilt and shame over their
angry reactions.

258
COLD EARS, TEMPORARY

“Ostrich trip.” They are avoiding being aware of what is happening around
them right about now.

COLD FEET, TEMPORARY

“Go away.” They are avoiding emotional involvement and vulnerability at

the present. They grew up in a thoroughly untrustworthy family.

RIGHT FOOT TEMPORARY COLDNESS

“No way, Jose!” They do not want support from others or the environment
out of a “poison apple” reaction that is being precipitated by current
similarities to their family experience.

LEFT FOOT TEMPORARY COLDNESS

“Stay away!” They are being systematically vulnerability-avoidant and

involvement-deflecting, out of an underlying self-distrust, due to their anger
and alarm reaction to their current surroundings.

COLD FINGERS, TEMPORARY

“I don’ wanna!” They are having some resistance to implementing their

destiny at present.

COLD HANDS, TEMPORARY

“Recoiling.” They are self-protectively pulling back from availability to and

participating in the world around them right now.

RIGHT HAND TEMPORARY COLDNESS

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are avoiding contact with the world at this

point, for fear of what the world would do to them.

LEFT HAND TEMPORARY COLDNESS

259
“I don’t dare!” They are currently having a real fear of their angry impulses
-- “run amok-anxiety.”

COLD NOSE, TEMPORARILY

“Ecological concern.” They are alarmed at what effect they might be having
on the environment at this time.

COLD TOES, TEMPORARILY

“Can’t be bothered.” They are manifesting a propensity to overlook the

details of their destiny-implementation of late.

COLD-HATING (Allergic To Cold)

“Maternal deprivation.” They are manifesting suppressed deprivation-grief

arising from pervasive and persistent lack of support throughout their
infancy and childhood. It has resulted in a “self-made person” who very
strongly believes there is no one out there for them, and that even God
might be Al Capone. They tend to be a “sealed unit” -- “island unto
themselves” -- “urban hermit” type of person.

COLD-LOVING

“Exploitation-rage.” There is repressed rage and resentment at being

restricted and abusively used by their parent(s). It has resulted in a serve-
aholic and self-denying pattern ever since, and they are compulsively co-
dependent. They hate it, but they can’t seem to do anything about it.

COLDNESS (Feeling cold; cold skin)

“Out in the cold.” They have a lot of deprivation-grief and fearfulness about
lack of support and being alone in the world. They are commitment-
distrusting and love-starved, as a result of early rather severe deprivation.
The sudden leaving of anger will often result in a feeling of coldness as the
underlying grief and/or fear are then experienced. (See the body parts
affected for more information)

COLDNESS HEADACHE (Sinus headache precipitated by coldness)

260
“Maternal deprivation.” They are suffering from suppressed grief over
abandonment-anxiety and frustration with their intimates about insufficient
support and love -- an issue dating back to childhood. They are in effect a
“self-made person” who tends very strongly to believe that there is no one
out there for them, and even that God might be Al Capone. They tend to be
a “sealed unit,” “island unto themselves,” “urban hermit” type of person. It
is the result of pervasive and persistent lack of support throughout their
infancy and childhood.

COLDS; “COMMON COLD”

“Now or never!” They have to pay attention to that which they have not
allowed to come to the conscious level for some time which has surfaced to
be confronted now. It is some information they need to know, that they need
to acknowledge, that they need to tell themselves. It’s been in their
subconscious and held down for quite a while, and now it’s pushing for
recognition. It utilizes as its precipitating mechanism a misinterpretation or
an emotional upset with the people who are close to them.

*************************************

“Take it on!” They need to take time out to handle the emotional and mental
issues that are bothering them. The effect is a feeling that too much is going
on at once, and that there is mental conflict that is causing confusion and
disorder in their life.

It represents a form of existential and destiny-avoidance in a tendency

toward not setting a stable pattern in their life, not taking the long view, and
not seeing how their life is going and what’s not working in some area of
their life. They come from a rather chaotic and avoidant dysfunctional
family.

*************************************

“Hanging on for dear life.” Their propensity is to hang on to old beliefs, a

pattern that just makes things all the worse, given the nature of the actual
process going on in their life. The emotional reaction is a sense of intense
dissatisfaction and helplessness, along with a suppressed anger, resentment

261
and hostility. They are the product of a rigid dysfunctional patriarchal
family.

*************************************

“Inner crying.” They are grieving over not being able to do anything about
things in their life. They feel that their life is unpredictable, uncontrollable
and overwhelming. There results mental disorder and small hurts, with a
feeling of being controlled by impersonal external factors such as the
weather or life circumstances.

Underlying all this is a suppressed despair over deprivation that occurred in

childhood, and which seems to be reoccurring now. The helplessness
feelings create the congestion, and the anger generates the inflammation.
They grew up in a demoralizingly dysfunctional family.

RUNNY NOSE

There is an “inner crying” that is in effect asking for help.

STUFFY NOSE

They are not recognizing their self-worth.

SNEEZING

They are experiencing a loss or an anticipation of loss reaction.

COUGHING

They are bothered by guilt feelings, arising out of the belief that they
somehow deserve the whole situation. (See each of these symptoms for
more information)

“COLD SORES” (Virus-caused blister(s) inside or outside the mouth)

“Festering fury.” They are suppressing angry words, and they have a real
fear of expressing them. The issue is grief-rage and an underlying sense of

262
deservingness of the loss of resources they have experienced and the ones
they are undergoing now.

They are being severely bothered by the irritations, frustrations and

annoyances in their surroundings. It reactivates early deprivation reactions
from a time when to object to losses only made it worse, in their self-
immersed or dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Overburdened.” They feel that they are being required to do too much, and
that they are under pressure to perform. They have the experience that they
are in over their head, and that they just can’t meet the requirements of life.
They are resentful over their situation, but they are unable to do anything
about that either. They are the product of a suppressive, demanding and
non-nurturing family.

*************************************

“Love-hunger.” They are feeling deeply deprived of emotional support,

acceptance and love in their life. Their experience is that there is nothing
they can do to improve the situation. It reactivates early deprivation
reactions from a time when to object to losses only made it worse in their
self-immersed or dysfunctional family.

RIGHT MOUTH COLD SORE

“Injustice-hating.” They have a lot of resentment about how the world

functions, and about how they were treated.

CENTER MOUTH COLD SORE

“Vast wasteland.” They are experiencing despair-rage over what they can
expect out of life.

LEFT MOUTH COLD SORE

“It’s all my fault.” They are suffering from shame and self-blame around
their deprivation experiences.

263
UPPER LIP COLD SORE

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They have been rescuing
and care-taking for love all their life -- and they are now arriving at the
conclusion that they neither deserve nor need to do this any more. They are
the product of an exploitative, depriving dysfunctional family.

LOWER LIP COLD SORE

“Lucy and the football.” They have the underlying conviction that any love
or other support will be yanked over and over again. Their family was
highly depriving in a forever promising and gamy manner.

“COLD SWEATS”

“Freezing freak-outs.” They have a lot of fearfulness and anticipation of

calamitous outcomes. They operate out of catastrophic expectations of a
vague and indefinable nature. There is an underlying sense of utter
helplessness and powerlessness involved here.

It arises from a history of unpredictable disasters occurring in a crisis-

hopping chaotic dysfunctional family. They never knew when or where the
next disaster would come from, just that it sure as hell would, and it would
be awful.

COLIC

“Red alert.” They are picking up mental irritation, impatience, annoyance,

emotional upset and tension from their parents and/or their surroundings,
and it is alarming and upsetting them. They are becoming irritable, angry
and impatient with everything as a result. They feel like they are in a “bed
of prickles.”

COLITIS (See COLON PROBLEMS)

COLLAPSED LUNG

“Deprivation City.” They have a real difficulty in taking in prana, chi, ki,
élan vitale, love or life energy, as a function of their prideful brutalizing

264
misuse of energy in past lives. They have an inability to renew to the breath
of life, along with a lack of enthusiasm and zeal for living. They have a real
inability to take in life, and they don’t feel worthy of living life fully.

They are suffering from depression and chronic grief, because they are
deeply afraid of taking in life energy. They are joy-avoidant and happiness-
squashing, out of a fear of the Universe. They lack Cosmic, community and
conjugal contact. They feel unworthy of living fully, and they are alone, sad
and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance or approval. They are once
again in a smothering and stifling environment, with a resulting sense that
life is dull and monotonous. They are the product of a withholding and non-
accepting family.

*************************************

“Self-suppression.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, unexpressed passions, strong desires and emotions. They don’t
have any sense of freedom or the right or ability to communicate their
feelings. This was generated by a self-immersed and dysfunctional family
who were exploitive, shame-inducing and enmeshed.

*************************************

“Barking up the wrong tree.” They tend to get into consuming passionate
commitments that lead nowhere, and to get into repeated devastating
unrequited love situations. They have a sensitive mind and a very strong
sense of justice, righteousness and generosity that frequently leads them
into blind alleys and exploitative situations and relationships. They come
from a dysfunctional family in which they held a parental role that led to
their repeatedly trying to rescue them from their self-defeating patterns.

*************************************

“Done in.” They are engaged in a collapsing, giving up, or loss of control,
due to there no longer being sufficient energy to maintain their “elasticity.”
There is a mental prostration, devastation and deactivation. They suffer
from an inner hopelessness, depression, and a sense of no longer having
control of their life. It is a reactivation of an old, familiar feeling, arising

265
from having grown up in a hopeless and helpless position in their severely
dysfunctional family.

RIGHT LUNG COLLAPSE

“Exploitation-paranoia.” They are struggling with guilt over real and/or

imagined abuses of energy and resources, to the point where they feel they
just can’t do it any more.

LEFT LUNG COLLAPSE

“Don’t need!” They have shame over having needs for energy and
resources, and they are prone to severe self-deprivation. It has now reached
the point where they are arriving at the end of their rope.

COLLARBONE PROBLEMS (The bone of the shoulder that joins the

breastbone and the shoulder blade)

“Ecological concerns.” The collar bones reflect our feelings and thoughts
about what we are doing and how we are doing it, as well as our attitudes
about how we are being related to and about our responsibilities. They
relate to the place from which we come motivationally, the foundation of
our feelings and intentions. They are the connection point between our
intentions and our actions.

When problems arise here, they reflect deep-seated conflicts and concerns
about where we are coming from and what effects we are having. There is a
requirement for a reorientation regarding their fundamental motivations and
intended outcomes that are going on which is putting them on a head-on
collision course with their whole lifestyle, especially in regards to their
relationship to responsibility in general and to their responsibilities in
particular.

They grew up in a family that put them in a situation where they had to take
a certain position regarding their relationship to the world and to where they
were going to be coming from regarding their fundamental motivations and
intentions. Either they had to take on too much responsibility or they
refused responsibility and accountability.

266
Now life is seeing to it that they have to re-decide how they are going to
relate to the world around them and to what it is they intend and want.

RIGHT COLLARBONE

“What am I doing?” They are being forced to re-evaluate their whole

relationship to the world around them. They have been operating in a given
manner based on fundamental assumptions about who other people are,
what the world is about, and how to relate to all that. Now they must revise
their whole approach to life.

LEFT COLLARBONE

“Self re-evaluation.” Their entire underlying motivational and intentional

system is being called into question. Their foundational place of orientation
is being massively challenged by the way their life is going. They formed
fundamental existential and value priority positions early in life, and now
they must reexamine their entire relationship to life, to the Cosmos, and to
themselves.

COLON PROBLEMS (The “garbage disposal” of the digestive system)

“Processing problems.” They are not being very successful in handling their
personal “shit.” They are experiencing an overload of side-effects, waste
products, and distortions of their functioning, arising from their
dysfunctional childhood. It is a healing crisis effect, in which they are being
required to “clear their tubes,” so that they can effectively channel their
energies, resources and intentions.

***********************************

“In their face.” They are being “nose-rubbed” in the effects of their self-
defeating and alienation-inducing patterns trained in by their enmeshed
and/or dysfunctional family.

************************************

267
“Won’t let go.” They are holding on to and refusing to let go of injustices
and abuses of the past. They are being plagued by exasperated doubts,
skepticism, cynicism and nihilism. They manifest over-criticality and a
strong inclination to “throw the baby out with the bath.” They are holding
on to and refusing to let go of injustices and abuses of the past. It arises
from a supremely fault-finding and dysfunctional family history.

************************************

“No place to put it.” They are having real difficulties handling their deeper
emotional issues and their side effects. They don’t seem to be able to find a
time or a place or a way to process and clear them. They are the product of
a distorting dysfunctional family.

************************************

“Blast from the past.” They are being inundated with emotional issues,
experiences, and processing from very early in their formative period. They
are in effect finding themselves caught up in their unexpressed and
suppressed grief reactions to what happened at the deepest level of their
emotional wounds. The foundational basis of this is their devastation from
being “rejected by God” (their mother, in the very beginning of their
formative process).

COLON CANCER

“Misery Maude.” They are not happy with their life or with the world
around them. “there is no joy in Bloodville!” is their continuous experience.
They were subjected to continuous abuse, exploitation, wrong-making and
suppression by their severely domineering and dysfunctional family.

********************************

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are in effect terrified of the universe, due to

being attacked from conception on. They have the deep-seated conviction
that they deserve all this assault, as a result of karma, because of the
continuousness of the pattern in their life. They were also programmed to

268
bring upon themselves further attacks from the environment, so that all their
life they have been under siege.

********************************

“Broken record.” They are severely close-minded, with a very poor ability
to learn life’s lessons. They are the “universal expert” who won’t listen to
counsel, in a “My mind’s made up -- Don’t confuse me with facts!” attitude.
They literally can’t let go of yesterday’s wastes, and they are full of backed
up hatred. It came from an equally dogmatic, authoritarian, dominating,
patriarchal and “sealed unit” cognitive system family who treated them as
the “intimate enemy.”

********************************

“Massive materialism.” There is a constant demanding search for more

possessions, more pleasures, and more satisfactions. They are forever
striving to achieve, only to find out that achievements don’t do it either.
They feel that they have been denied their rightful happiness and position.
They are the product of a power-and position-conscious patriarchal family
who felt the same way. (See CANCER)

COLITIS (Inflammation of the colon)

“Self-deprivation.” They have a guilty feeling of unlovability and a great

need to be loved that is prevented fulfillment by self-punishing self-denial
for presumed transgressions that the outside world is unaware of. There is
desperation for affection they never got that results in self-denigration and
pessimism. They are apt to go off into a frenzy of self-recrimination in
reaction to rejection of love from a dear one. They are over-conscientious
and hyper sensitively over-conscious and conscientious, with false feelings
of accountability and moral culpability. They tend to be a self-defeating
loser out of an emotionally immature attitude of self-destruction.

There is a considerable feeling of undue burdens, emotional strain and

loneliness. They are very insecure, and they have a very difficult time
letting go of that which is over and done with. It came from over-exacting

269
parents who imposed an experience of intense oppression, over-
responsibility, and defeat.

*********************************

“Done in.” They feel injured and degraded by some external malignant
force. They want to eliminate the responsible agent. They feel they are
being humiliated, and they want to dispose of it now! They are bursting
with unexpressed rage, and they are super-self-suppressing. At the same
time, they are fulminatingly furious about both their incapacity and their
situation.

They are in perfectionistic denial of the realities that they are maintaining a
“conspiracy of silence” about, and which they studiously avoid looking at.
They are a basically sensitive, bright, timid, dependent, Pollyannaishly
denying, and passive person who is reluctant to take life on. They are
indecisive, ingratiating, immature and impotent.

They are the product of a dysfunctional family in which the mother was
dominating and repressive and the father was passive and jealous. There
were many miseries and health hassles in the family, and yet it was a “tight
little island” from which there was no escape.

*********************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They have an organized suspiciousness orientation

derived from persecutory parenting. They believe that virtually everything
is dangerous and double-dealing. They feel that they have the right to
eliminate the causes of their presumed persecution.

They display extreme distrust, security-freak, and stability-seeking

behavior. They are actively suspicious of the environment, and they are
intensely control-imposing. They have great rageful resentment, feeling like
they have received something poisonous. They want to get rid of it, to
dispose of it and its source.

They come from an overtly paranoid and hostile family who hid none of
their embittered, extremely suspicious and rage fully vengeful attitudes.

270
They treated the individual as the “intimate enemy” as well.

ILEECTOMY (Removal of the colon)

“Universal expert.” They are severely closed-minded, with a very poor

ability to learn life’s lessons. They won’t listen to counsel, in a “My mind’s
made up – don’t confuse me with facts!” attitude.

They literally can’t let go of yesterday’s wastes, and they cling to the “bad
old ways” intensely, with much resentful rumination about yesterday’s
hurts. They are not happy with their life or with the world around them, and
there is a constant demanding search for “more” -- more possessions, more
pleasures, and more satisfactions.

They constantly strive to achieve, only to find out that achievement doesn’t
do it either. “there is no joy in Bloodville!” is their experience.

It all came from an equally dogmatic, authoritarian, dominating, patriarchal

and “sealed unit” cognitive system family, who treated them as the
“intimate enemy.”

INFLAMMATION OF THE COLON

“Self-rejecting affection-desperation.” They have a guilty feeling of

unlovability and a great need to be loved that is prevented fulfillment by
self-punishing self-deprivation for presumed transgressions that the outside
world is unaware of.

Their constantly thwarted efforts to achieve affection that never get results
end up in intense self-denigration and severe pessimism. They are apt to go
off into a frenzy of self-recrimination in reaction to rejection of love from a
dear one. There is a considerable feeling of undue burdens, emotional strain
and loneliness.

They are over-conscientious and hyper-sensitively over-conscious, with a

false feeling of accountability and moral culpability. They tend to be a self-
defeating loser, out of an emotionally immature attitude of self-destruction.
They are very insecure, and they have a very difficult time letting go of that,

271
which is over and done with. It came from over-exacting parents who
imposed an experience of intense oppression, over-responsibility and
defeat.

*******************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They have a generalized suspiciousness orientation

that is derived from persecutory parenting. They believe that virtually
everything is dangerous and double-dealing. They feel that they have the
right to eliminate the causes of their presumed persecution.

They display extreme distrust, security-freak, and stability-seeking

behavior. They are actively suspicious of the environment, and they are
intensely control imposing. They have great rageful resentment, feeling like
they have received something poisonous. They want to get rid of it, dispose
of it, and to destroy its source. They are the product of a rather severely
paranoid patriarchal and authoritarian family who treated them as the
“intimate enemy.”

MUCOUS IN THE COLON

“Blast from the past.” There are layered deposits of old, confused thought
that are clogging the channels of elimination. They are in effect “wallowing
in the gummed mire” of the past.

It is the result of their having had to try to make sense of the nonsensical
lifestyle of their dysfunctional family. They haven’t found out yet that “the
war is over,” and that the world is not their family.

COMA

“Lem’ me outta here!” They are engaged in fearful escaping from

something or someone. They are “checking out” rather than “facing the
music.” There is a profound sense of endangerment and of a hostile
environment. They don’t want to stay, but they are afraid to die. They can
also be, being kept here by the fears of their intimates about losing them.
Their sense of lack of safety got started in their family, which conveyed to
them that the world is not a safe place for them.

272
CONCUSSION (Stunned, dizziness, confusion, unconsciousness)

“Brain bruise.” They are feeling traumatically over-demanded,

overburdened and overwhelmed. They feel at some level that they no longer
have the wherewithal to rise to the requirements of the situation, and they
are unwilling to continue with the impossible responsibilities they face.
They therefore have “staged a walkout.”

This is a new development for them, in that heretofore, they have always
considered it their somehow deserved deprivation and punishment for being
a “moral cretin.” It is a pattern that got started when they were left to their
own devices from the very beginning.

Theirs was a significantly dysfunctional and self-immersed family, and they

had to fend for themselves and later to take care of and to make up for the
incompetence, inconsiderateness, and irresponsibility of the parent(s).
There may also have been an accusatory and/or denigrating parent, most
likely the father. This developed into a lifestyle, and they are now saying,
“This is and up with which I will no longer put!” It is part of a clearing out
of this whole pattern.

*************************************

“Space case.” They have been living too much in their head in a high-flying
idealist or ungrounded impractical manner. They need to get back to earth
and deal with reality more responsibly. They were systematically under-
required and over-indulged by their “keep ‘em around the old homestead”
family.

CONDYLOMATA (Non-contagious herpes -- viral polyps on the genitals)

“Unfit for human consumption.” Their feeling is that there is something

inherently “bad, wrong and evil” about them that makes them unacceptable
in God’s eyes, and persona non grata with other people. They expect
rejection, and they feel in their inner core that it is somehow deserved. It
got started when their mother became enraged when they weren’t able to
live up to her rescue expectations.

273
 *************************************

“Cosmic contrition.” They have a massive belief in sexual guilt and the
need for punishment. They are full of public shame, and they are convinced
that God is going to punish them for being who they are. They are intensely
rejecting of their genitals and of themselves.

It all comes from a “tantalizing tarantula” seductive-destructive entice-

arouse-attack and sex-ploitative/punitive parenting pattern. They were made
to feel like an utter “moral cretin” for being a sexual being.

CONGESTION

“Inner crying.” They are having a reaction to an experienced rejection from

someone they love, or they are undergoing an exacerbation or return of their
longstanding feeling that they have never had the love they needed from
someone they loved very deeply.

They feel they have somehow caused the abandonment, rejection or loss,
and they are trying to “put a new ending on the old story” with “standins for
the original cast.” They feel like they are trying to “squeeze blood from a
turnip,” and they deeply resent it. The whole thing got started and
maintained by an intense “never good enough” parenting pattern.

CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE

“Broken hearted.” They have little or no sense of personal worth or

deservingness of love, as if they lost out in the “love sweepstakes”
altogether. Their feeling is that they are “unfit for human consumption,” and
that no one could, would or should ever be there with and for them.

Yet hope springs eternal, and they put out reams of heart energy and service
in the “heart of their hearts” dream that some day their prince(ss) will come.
They are suffering from a severe case of abandonment-paranoia and
rejection expectations, and they have had a major shock around this issue of
late. The experience is that there is no hope and that all is lost. The effect is
to overwhelm their heart, and it is failing under the crushing load of distress
they are experiencing.

274
It is the result of a loveless, shame-inducing and exploitative dysfunctional
family who gave them no support, nurturance, acceptance or fulfillment.
Instead they harped on how “You asked for it, asshole!” to such a degree
that the individual now believes it in their heart. So they are in effect dying
of grief.

CONGESTIVE PNEUMONIA

“Insult to injury.” They are having “salt poured into” emotional wounds that
are not allowed to heal. They are fearful and anxious, and in effect, they are
too devastated to take it any more. They are feeling overwhelmed and
incapable of taking any more, so they are in effect “throwing in the towel.”
They are the product of a severely self-immersed dysfunctional family who
“took it out on them” when they were a child.

*************************************

“Plexiglass barrier.” They can’t let people in or themselves out, due to their
strong ego that gets in the way. They also have they experience of having to
handle the whole of life single-handed, with no help from any friends.
While this has made for a modicum of success as a survival strategy, it has
cut them off from joy and love, and that is now taking its toll.

They were left to their own devices from the very beginning. They were
subjected to effective emotional abandonment at a very early age, to which
they reacted with becoming a “self-made person” with a “portable Plexiglas
phone booth” around them.

*************************************

“Giving up the ghost.” They are having an “Enough is enough!” reaction,

and they are “heading on out.” They are desperately tired of life due to
generalized disturbances. They are suffering under the influence of lifelong
suppressed grief. They are overcome with futility feelings, and they are
struggling with confusion-inducing emotional conflict. The result is a
failure to maintain immunity to negative ideas. They are the product of a
severely invasive, negating and denigrating dysfunctional family.

275
CONSTIPATION, CHRONIC

“No shit!” They are engaged in stubborn resistance to working on a

problem, and they are refusing to relate to it. They have a desire to slow up
or stop a condition, experience or requirement. They are intensely refusing
to the flow of life and to the way things work.

They have a possessive, controlling, angry retentiveness, a pronounced

tendency to refuse to release old ideas, and to end up stuck in the past. They
have poverty consciousness that sometimes leads to stinginess and Scrooge-
like behavior, such as grasping and hoarding of money, people or property.
They grew up in a rigidly restrictive and conservative patriarchal family.

*************************************

“No way, Jose!” They are self-suppressing, withholding, resentful and self-
contained. There is a fundamental lack of trust, along with an
accompanying and resulting anxiety and fearfulness. There are thoughts of
restriction, bondage and immobilization or inaction. They come from an
authoritarian, suppressive and untrustworthy family.

*************************************

“Grit and bear it.” They are in a situation where nothing good will come of
it, but they keep grimly on with it without saying anything about it. They
feel stuck permanently in the patterns of the past, and that they might as
well accept that fact.

They are basically defeatist and convinced that nothing will ever work, and
they fret constantly. In effect, they are “hunkering down in the bunker” and
refusing to let go of the “good old ways” and the ideas of the past. Out of
all this comes an embittered lack of compassion and an associated
pessimism and cynicism. They feel unloved, rejected and persecuted, and
they are deeply distrustful and disgusted. It all resulted from their getting
into a power struggle with the mother that they have never won over or let
go of.

CONSTIPATION, TEMPORARY

276
“Hanging on.” They are refusing to let go of something that is no longer
relevant, of waste from the past. They are afraid that if they let go, nothing
of comparable value will replace it. It is based on an experience of
deprivation or of poverty consciousness in their family.

CONSTRICTIONS (Limitations on movement possibilities)

“Holding back.” They are exercising excessive self-control, and they have a
real fear of letting go. The fear is of falling in love, of losing touch with
reality, of losing consciousness, of being rejected, of being abandoned, of
being taken advantage of, of loss of support, of loss of self, of running
amok, and/or of annihilation. They are freaked out for dear life by
“dangerous environment” perceptions and equally powerful self-distrust,
both of which were generated by a deeply distrusting and distrust-inducing
family. (See the area(s) affected for more information)

CONTACT DERMATITIS (Rashes arising from coming in contact with

irritants)

“Polluted environment.” They are being invaded and permeated by

damaging influences in their surroundings. They are being subjected to
intolerable inputs and experiences. It is a repetition of their early
environment, where their dysfunctional family imposed a poisonous
atmosphere and contaminated support systems. They ended up believing
that they deserve no better. It is a message to them to the effect of “Don’t
pollute yourself any more!”

***************************************

“I hate my life!” They are in the grips of suppressed irritation or repressed

anger trying to find expression. The anger is often more towards themselves
than towards others. Someone or something is getting under their skin,
irritating and frustrating them, upsetting them, and alarming them. It brings
up old fears and insecurities that are reinforcing their repression. It also has
the effect of putting a barrier between them and others. It is a pattern that
got started as a child in their wrong-making and chronically dysfunctional
family.

277
 ***************************************

“Crushed Coke can.” They feel stifled and manifestation-prevented by the

world around them. They have the experience of being over-run with
feelings that don’t seem to have any solution or any possibility of things
changing. They are in effect denying of their own potency and self-worth. It
came from being systematically undermined and denigrated as a child.

***************************************

“Suppressed rage.” They are repressing rather strong anger and aggression
reactions. Who are they allergic to? There is an irritation reaction to life,
and they are reacting to people instead of interacting with them. They are
laboring under the effects of an unresolved aggravation or irritant from
childhood. They are the product of an intensely enraging dysfunctional
family which constantly subjected them to intolerable and insoluble
situations.

***************************************

“Up against the wall.” They are having an over-reaction to felt threats to
their well-being, to something hostile to their welfare. They are engaged in
on-the-edge functioning, due to severe emotional difficulties. They feel
threatened and they fear loss, so they take a “rejecting first” approach.

They are dominated by anxiety, suppressed emotions and generalized dread.

They have a deep-seated fear of letting other people know what they are
experiencing or who they are. There is a deep level of fear about having to
participate fully in life or about potential annihilation. They have an intense
distrust of letting something inside their boundaries. They are the product of
a frighteningly dysfunctional and invasive family in which you could never
tell when the next piece of shit was coming off the wall. You just knew it
would.

CONTINUOUS ERECTION (Four or more hours at a time)

“Thwarted horny.” They become “possessed” by sexual ideation, feelings,

intentions and arousals. They were “tantalizing tarantula’d” by their

278
seductive-destructive and seduce-slapping mother, often subterraneanly,
subconsciously and subtly -- but always continuously.

CONVERSION DISORDER (Odd physical symptoms like hysterical

blindness and glove anesthesia)

“Perennial infant.” They are engaged in responsibility and accountability-

avoidance. They effectively refuse to “grow up,” and they are an imperious
demander who will not contribute. They come from a family in which they
were systematically sex-ploitated. In effect, they were turned into the
infantile “spouse” of the parent(s).

CONVULSIONS (See SEIZURES)

COORDINATION PROBLEMS

“Manifestation-phobia.” They are afraid that if they are too smooth in their
execution of their actions it will lead to some sort of catastrophic outcome.
It arises from being programmed to inhibit, derail or interrupt their
performance chains during the “practicing period” of their development by
convenience-concerned, possessive, envious and/or dysfunctional parents.
(See “AWKWARDNESS”)

CORNEA PROBLEMS

“Emotional wounds.” They are experiencing the effects of longstanding

deep hurts and deprivations from childhood that they have tried to avoid
having to deal with. They are now pushing through to consciousness, and
they are demanding to be dealt with, lest things deteriorate further.

It is a pattern that got started in a significantly dysfunctional and resultantly

exploitative and emotionally wounding family.

RIGHT CORNEA PROBLEM

“I can’t take it any more.” They have deep hurts around their relationship
with the world around them.

LEFT CORNEA PROBLEM

279
“What’s wrong with me?” They are suffering from profound emotional
wounds around their self-relationship.

BROKEN BLOOD VESSEL(S) IN THE CORNEA

“Deep grief.” They have a longstanding suppressed, mourning, over their

“childhood lost” and/or over deprivation, neglect or rejection. Their
experience is that they have no right to mourn because it is their “just
desserts,” due to its having happened from so early on.

BROKEN VESSEL(S) IN RIGHT EYE

“Blew it again!” They have the experience that they just don’t have what it
takes to make it possible to be successful and lovable.

BROKEN VESSEL(S) IN LEFT EYE

“Alone again -- naturally!” They have the conviction that they don’t
deserve quality of life or love in their life.

CONJUNCTIVITIS (Inflammation of the cornea)

“I hate it!” They have a good deal of anger and frustration at what they are
looking at in life. There is a sense that there is no solution, that it is a “lose-
lose” situation. They see no point in all of it, not to mention seeing the
cosmic perfection in things.

This is not an unfamiliar situation for them, as it harks back to a lot of times
when as a child they faced just such “double bind” circumstances in their
dysfunctional family.

RIGHT EYE CONJUNCTIVITIS

“What am I supposed to do!?” They feel powerless in an insane world.

LEFT EYE CONJUNCTIVITIS

“I don’t have what it takes.” They are feeling overwhelmed and unable to
cope with their personal situation.

280
PTERYGIUM (Growth onto the cornea)

“Nursing old wounds.” They feel victimized and trapped in the past, as a
result of their being forced to live with painful and destructive situations as
a child in their intractably dysfunctional family.

RIGHT EYE PTERYGIUM

“Learned helplessness.” They feel unable to cope with the requirements of

life.

LEFT EYE PTERYGIUM

“Just desserts.” They feel that somehow it is their “earned fate” to suffer.

BLUISH CORNEAS

“Harm-anxious.” They are worried and frightened, as they expect

unpredictable calamities like those which occurred in their childhood in
their severely dysfunctional family.

REDDISH CORNEAS

“All out.” They are high-strung and passionate, and they feel everything
strongly. They are also inclined to be emotional-commotional, like their
family was.

YELLOWISH CORNEAS

“Running on empty.” They are melancholy and depressed. They are now
“reaching the end of their rope.” It is the result of an exploitive and
demoralizingly dysfunctional family.

CORNS

“Hung up in the past.” They are highly past-focused, and they are
stubbornly ruminating over old hurt, pain and loss experiences. They are
effectively calcified in their past pains and negative feelings, and they are

281
trapped in hardened areas of thought. They come from a similar family --
one that clung to past wounds.

CORONARY THROMBOSIS (Clots in heart blood vessels)

“I’m not good enough.” They are feeling alone and scared, in an “I don’t do
enough -- I’ll never make it!” feeling. The experience is that it’s all on their
shoulders, and, like “Atlas” if they even shrug, all hell will break loose and
it will all be their fault. They are bottom line convinced that they don’t have
what it takes. It comes from their having been the “family hoist” in a
dysfunctional family who depended on them to be the one to pull it all out
of the fire. (See HEART ATTACK)

CORTISOL PROBLEMS (Adrenal hormone)

“Effectance issues.” They are having difficulties in dealing with the world
in a functional manner. Their orientation and approach is getting in their
way as they seek to make an impact and to contribute. Their family was
highly disruptive in the formative process regarding their environmental
interface.

LOW CORTISOL

“Blown out.” They are suffering from overload, threats to well being, fear,
anxiety, and stress to the point where they no longer care for themselves.
They feel like a defeated victim, and they have developed a giving up and
emotionally indifferent attitude, along with a certain lack of courage and a
nihilistic defeatism. Their experience is that everything is too much work,
responsibility and devastation. They come from a highly dysfunctional and
demoralizing family.

HIGH CORTISOL

“Furiously dominating.” They are manifesting pronounced “authority

freak” control issues. They are experiencing intense impatience, and they
are engaging in hyper-irritability and demandingness. They are also
manifesting unresolved enviousness and loss-paranoia. They are essentially
being abusively willful in an ecologically insensitive and even in an

282
ecologically damaging manner. They are the product of an authoritarian
patriarchal household. (See HORMONAL PROBLEMS)

COSTALGIA (See PAIN IN THE RIBS)

COUGH

“Guilt-grabbing.” They have guilt over assumed accountability for negative

events, desires, thoughts and outcomes. It often reflects the suppression of
an intended thought or comment that is instead swallowed, leading to their
choking on it.

They have intensely mixed feelings about the subject, the conversation, the
situation, the person, or the implications and ramifications of what is going
down. It’s the “thoughts can (or did) kill” feeling. It arises from blame-
throwing in their family.

COUGH -- PERSISTENT

“Keeping their mouth shut.” They have a lot of inhibition around self-
expression and guilt over what they want to say. There is something they
need to speak about, but they can’t bring themselves to do anything about it.
They have a desire to bark at the world in a “See me! Listen to me,
dammit!” manner.

They don’t feel noticed, appreciated or loved, and they are intensely
annoyed by that. Sometimes, it’s an attention-getting mechanism acquired
in a family too self-immersed to meet their needs. They come from a rather
intensely selfish and denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“My just desserts.” They are choking on their situation, in a guilty and self-
disgusted manner. They feel criticized and deserving of censure, and they
are prone to guilt-grabbing.

It reflects perfectionistic parents who induced a fear of being caught in a

mistake. The net effect here is that they become cautiously critical of

283
themselves, and they are over-ready to grab guilt when things go wrong.

COUVADE (The expectant father experiences pregnancy side effects, such

as nausea, mood swings, weight gain and bloating)

“Boundaryless anticipatory joy.” They are so excited about what’s

happening that they emotionally fuse with their wife, and they experience
what she is experiencing to a point. They either had a truly loving
childhood or they were rather neglected, rejected and/or deprived as a child
and they are eagerly looking forward to make up for all that.

***************************************

“Frustrated futility feelings.” They are intensely troubled that they can’t
participate and ameliorate more. They have a deep-seated need to help and
desire to “make it all better.” They were the “family hoist” who held
everybody up in the background when they were a child.

***************************************

“Precipitation-guilt.” “I’ve caused World War III!” is the feeling they are
having. It is especially pronounced if they are not fully welcoming of this
huge change in their life. They were always being turned to with
accusations like, “Now look at what you’ve done!” as they grew up.

***************************************

“Envy over her ability to bear a child.” They are having something of a
“male shame” reaction over the enormity of what childbearing is. It makes
them feel inferior and perhaps useless or a burden. They were made to feel
somehow wrong, bad and evil for being a male, or it could be an instance of
a rather universal male feeling.

***************************************

“Look at me!” They are feeling shoved to the sidelines by this “pas de
deux” relationship that is going to be around for the rest of their life. This is
also a rather universal male feeling, though it could also be caused by an

284
over-indulgent and male privilege child-rearing. (Some of this information
came from an article called “Why do Some Expectant Fathers Experience
Pregnancy Symptoms?” By D. Barbara in Scientific American, October,
2004)

COXSACKIE VIRUS (Intense tension and pain in the upper shoulders and
lower neck, along with flu symptoms)

“Straw that broke the camel’s back” reaction. It is a response to having to

handle too much for too long -- a responsibility overload stress symptom.
Life is being intensely demanding of their system, and it produces a kind of
“just barely there” functioning -- able to handle only the pressing demands
of life. They feel the heaviness of life, and they have a problem carrying
their responsibilities in a joyful manner. Life is a very serious business to
them, and they have real difficulty “lightening up.”

They tend to take on too many responsibilities and/or to feel responsible for
handling everything personally. They feel that they dare not relinquish their
control of themselves, the environment and the events around them, lest all
hell break loose.

They operate out of a very strong sense of “Papa/Mama knows best,” and
they feel that no one else knows how to do things the way they simply have
to be done. So “the buck stops with them,” and now they are breaking down
under the load.

When they finally do succumb to exhaustion, they spend a lot of time in a

heap or staring at the wall or like a lump, complete with phone phobia, and
amotivational syndrome for anything but the most immediate needs. The
pain and tension in the neck and shoulders tends to immobilize them and
make them painfully aware of their down time while everything is going to
hell in a bread basket situation. All of this makes them highly susceptible to
infection and re-infection with this stress-related virus.

There are, of course, a number of situations where that can happen. Here
are three:

285
“Life calamities.” The Universe has dealt them some hard cards of late
and/or they live a crisis-hopping lifestyle. In either case, it is proving to be
too much for them to handle right now, and it activates an underlying sense
of being insufficient to the cause of living.

“Future shock.” “Stop the world, I want to get off!” This reaction happens
when life is laying massive amounts of change on them recently. It’s a “One
more change and I’ll go off the deep end!” type of reaction. It tends to
evoke a sense of having too much asked of them all their life.

“Healing crisis.” They are manifesting high stress-vulnerability, due to

emotional exhaustion connected with an intensely accelerated and deep-
reaching healing process in which they are on down time while they re-
program their whole “bio-computer.”

This virus attack involves re-contacting very deep emotional wounds and
early deprivations and degradations, with a surfacing and releasing of long-
suppressed grief and mourning. It also involves re-vamping their entire
belief system, emotional meaning readings, and operational functioning
processes.

On top of which, it also often involves a good slug of “the hair of the dog
that bit them,” in the form of representations of situations that are
prototypic and that evoke the same devastations as the original imprinting
events. It is indicative of significant progress towards liberation from the
patterns that are being cleared out in this process.

“CRABS” (Venereal disease)

“Moral cretin.” They suffer from sexual guilt and they are engaged in self-
punishment for sexual pleasure. Very often, this will be precipitated and/or
accompanied by a feeling of engaging in and enjoying of what feels like an
incestuous relationship.

It is caused by having come up in a repressive, denial-dominated,

accusatory family in which there is a good deal of “shadow sexuality”
going down in the form of sex-ploitative parenting or even incestuous
practices of one form or another.

286
“CRAMPS” (Muscle) [If they are in the leg or foot, walk on it to alleviate
the problem]

“Change panic-grabs.” They are prone to fearful gripping in an agitated

tension manner. They are “holding on for dear life” to some idea or feeling
or situation, out of a belief that to let go is to bring on disaster. They are
being willful and stubborn, and they are refusing to move forward.

It stems from a family experience in which the new and unknown was often
a negative experience. It also represents having to confront issues they have
been putting off for some time (perhaps lifetimes).

***********************************

“Flashbacks.” They are tightening their thoughts through fear, as they tense
up and maintain a hyper-vigilant “Nam-vet” type of reactivity. They feel
very unsafe in the world, and they are unable to relax and let go. It is the
result of a “Nam-like” family environment. (See the specific muscles for
further particulars)

DEEP ACHE INSIDE THE MUSCLE TYPE CRAMPS

“Despair-freak out.” They are experiencing an activation of their deep

underlying sense that things are going to come to a bad end. It generates a
sense of apprehension, negative expectations and depression.

It arises from an early and subsequent formative history of a rather severely

demoralizing and depriving nature, as well as from intense messaging that
they are only getting their “just desserts.”

“CRAMPS” (Uterine)

“Female-railing.” They are rejecting their femininity and/or femininity and

womankind in general. They have low self-acceptance and dislike being a
woman, due to devaluation and disempowerment as a person and as a
female in childhood. They simultaneously hated it and felt they deserved it.
They are therefore intensely tense and fearing of pain, as they persist in the

287
belief that they have to grit and bear it. (See “P.M.S.” [Pre-Menstrual
Syndrome])

CRANIAL PRESSURE

“Closed mind.” They have a strong sense of confinement arising from a bad
case of closed-mindedness. The Universe is telling them something, and
they are steadfastly refusing to let it in. The result is a growing sense of
pressure within and on the head. It comes from growing up in a similarly
closed system family.

CREUTZFELDT-JAKOB DISEASE (Virus-caused deterioration of the

brain)

“Left on a desert island.” They feel that they have been abandoned by the
“Home Office,” and there have been serious conflicts between their
personal goals and the Divine intent. They feel drained and over-demanded,
and that their life is on a path that is completely against their will and
desires. Now they have “given up the ghost,” and they are full of anxiety,
worry, agitation and deterioration.

It is the product of a significantly dysfunctional family in which a lot didn’t

make sense and yet it was justified as being “God’s Will” or the equivalent.
The family also did not respond to their needs, and they were forced to take
over the meeting of their own needs because no one else would. As a result,
they developed an abiding distrust of the Universe.

CROHN’S DISEASE (See LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS)

“CROUP” (Childhood cough and difficulty breathing)

“NOW look what’s happening!” They are experiencing guilt and shame, as
well as anxiety and tension about how unsettled things are around them.
They feel they are somehow the cause of it all and that the world is an
unsafe place. They feel alone in the world and responsible for all that
happens. They are suppressing their feelings of anger and grief in response
to the emotional tension in the family. (See BRONCHIAL PROBLEMS)

288
“CROWN AREA” PROBLEMS (Top of the head)

“Overwhelmed.” They have intense cope-ability concerns and competence-

anxiety -- feelings of total inadequacy to the cause. There is a fear that they
are insufficiently resourced to take on the inputs and inspirations from the
spiritual realm. The result is that they feel unable to carry out their Cosmic
responsibilities.

It arises from confidence-and competence-undermining parenting as a

means of keeping them around as a resource to them. It was in reaction to
sensing their elevated capabilities and connection to the “Home Office.”

CRYING -- EXCESSIVE OR CHRONIC

“Fail-wailing.” They have a strong feeling of despair and pain arising from
a sense of not having what it takes to make the thing work. It can also
represent a sense of being overwhelmed by the environment and/or of being
unfairly restricted, deprived and/or attacked by the unmodifiable
environment.

It is the feeling of being at the mercy of the world of the infant, and it
derives from growing up in a demoralizingly dysfunctional family in which
nothing worked and nothing could be done about it.

FREQUENT CRYING

“Hapless, helpless, hopeless.” They are having an impotent rage and despair
reaction to what feels like a terminal or at least a permanent or long-lasting
dreadful situation. It is a resignation reaction to having grown up in a
thoroughly dysfunctional family in which there was nothing that could be
done to make things sane.

INEXPLICABLE TEARS

“Back burner processing.” They are engaged in working through of very

old and unresolved grief arising from early deprivation, degradation and/or
humiliation. It is now recognized by the “wounded child” within that this

289
was not deserved after all, and that mourning for their “childhood lost” is
required.

CUMULATIVE TRAUMA DISORDER (Job-related)

“Recognition-deprivation.” They have an inner conflict between their felt

responsibilities and need to be of service vs. their need for self-commitment
and enlightened self-interest. They don’t know how to integrate altruistic
concern and selfless service with personal need-meeting and self-
advancement.

They are not able to carry on with a “What other people think of me is none
of my business!” attitude. Instead, they are hyper-sensitive to criticism, and
they crave recognition, appreciation, and response from the world around
them.

This situation makes for considerable resentment, frustration and anger, and
they are therefore very irritable and quite alienated towards the daily
responsibilities they perform. There is also a considerable amount of
disappointment over the lack of recognition for their performance.

The net effect is that they grudgingly carry out their responsibilities -- in a
kind of “unsung hero(ine)” manner -- and they quietly fervently wish that
their efforts were more appreciated.

This all arose from an exploitative and self-immersed dysfunctional family

who relied on them heavily, with little realization or recognition of their
life-necessity-supplying support.

*************************************

“Competence-anxious.” They have difficulty in articulating and carrying

out their intentions, and they are concerned about their ability to move
through life with ease and skill. They are cope-ability-concerned and
lacking in confidence. As a result, they are quite uptight and rather
ungraceful in their execution of things. It arises from “You can do no right!”
messaging from a rejecting and demanding family.

290
CUSHING’S DISEASE (See ADRENAL DEPLETION)

CUTICLE PROBLEMS

“Picky, picky, picky.” They are strongly prone to apply perfectionistic

standards to themselves, and to a lesser extent, to others. Their intense
feeling is they never quite measure up to standards, that there is always
something missing, incomplete, inadequate or wrong with their efforts and
products and those of others. They experienced highly conditional
acceptance based on perfectionistic standards when they were a child.

************************************

“Loose ends.” They have a feeling of unfinished business, like they haven’t
covered the bases that need covering. They feel that “the buck stops here,”
and that they have to “hands on handle” everything. Not having something
covered makes them very nervous. It arises from having had to fend for
themselves a lot as a child.

(See the particular finger(s) involved for more information)

CUTS

“Slash-lashing.” They are punishing themselves for not following their own
values, standards and rules for doing things. There is also a tendency for
people who are close to them to be “cutting” and to “cut them to the quick,”
out of the same pattern. They are the product of a perfectionistic family
who constantly made them feel bad, wrong and evil for not coming up to
snuff.

*************************************

“Utter frustration.” They have a pattern of coming from a suppressed rage

and a strong desire to “cut someone off.” They therefore tend to be subtly
sarcastic, subterraneanly hurtful, and systematically wrong-making in their
interpersonal interface. The whole thing got started in a blame-throwing and
cuttingly sarcastic family in which it was not OK to be directly angry and
aggressive. (See the part(s) of the body involved for more information)

291
CYSTIC FIBROSIS (Fiber in the internal organs, particularly in the form of
sticky mucous in the lungs)

“Things just aren’t going to work out for me.” They have a thick belief that
life is going to be a “downhill run.” They are suffering from chronic grief
and depression because they are deeply afraid of taking in life energy. They
are joy-avoidant and happiness-squashing, out of a fear of the Universe
generated by their misuse of life energy in their past lives. They feel
unworthy of living fully, and they are forlornly alone, sad and non-
belonging, with no sense of acceptance. They tend to be life-rejecting and
self-disgusted.

It arose in a family in which nothing worked, especially for them. This

pattern will be particularly pronounced in people who were put into a
“family hoist” position or who feel they have to rescue their family to
“justify their existence” or to “atone for” their “evilness.”

CYSTS (Fluid-filled sacs in their body)

“Poor me.” They are running the same old painful scenario in their head,
and they are heavily into self-pity. They are nursing old hurts and current
examples, as they are unable to heal their hurt feelings. Underlying the
pattern is a guilt-based self-rejection that was generated in a blame-
throwing and shame-inducing family.

Section 3

292
293
C

294
110

295
296
C

111

112

113

114

115

116

117

118

297
119

120

121

122

123

124

125

126

127

298
128

129

130

131

132

133

134

135

299
136

137

138

139

140

141

142

143

144

300
145

146

147

148

149

150

151

152

301
153

154

302
DANDRUFF

“Self-doubt.” They are caught up in “head vs. heart” conflicts, in the form
of self-doubts about the commitments they are making or carrying out.
They are full of guilt-grabbing self-disgust and self-distrust. It is the result
of wrong-making, blame-throwing, question-raising and confidence-
undermining by their family when they were a child.

*********************************

“Rigid resistance.” It is reflective of continuous rumination on old mental

patterns or ingrained self-attitudes that need to be released. They have a
habit of hanging on to things till the last dog has dropped. It comes from
growing up in a highly conservative family.

DEAFNESS

“Martian anthropologist.” Their soul chose to have the experience of being

a “sidelines participant-observer” for this lifetime. They wanted to both
learn from this experience and to teach from the wisdom it brings and from
that they brought with them.

*********************************

“Rejecting urban hermit.” They have an intensely self-isolating orientation

along the lines of “Don’t bother me!” There is a strong stubborn streak and
an isolated rejection of inputs that raises the question, “What don’t they
want to hear?”

They are into bull-headed stubbornness and insisting on “marching to their

own drummer.” It’s a case of “hardening of the attitudes” and a “firmly
sealed unit” pattern. They are rigidly insisting on doing things their own
way -- ignoring advice and going it alone. They are intensely, self-isolating,
self-centered and self-complacent. In the extreme case, self-deluding
behavior can lead to paranoia.

303
In addition to the impact of the handicap the deafness creates, their “urban
hermit” orientation arose from being regarded by their family as the cause
of all their problems, so they feel that involvement and vulnerability is
dangerous, destructive and very painful. They are also likely to have a
serious problem of worthlessness feelings and a lack of self-love.

It is the result of unresolved past life issues that need to be examined this
time. Because the issues are so loaded, they are trying to avoid dealing with
them again. There is a deep distrust of the Universe for setting their life up
this way and for running things the way it does.

RIGHT EAR DEAFNESS

“Take it and shove it!” They are manifesting a refusal to hear what the
world is saying.

LEFT EAR DEAFNESS

“Shut up in there!” They are turning a “deaf ear” to their own “inner voice.”

DEATH “BLUNT FORCE” (Fall, explosion, blow to head, collision, hit by

moving object- e.g. a car, etc.)

“Outta here!” They wanted an instantaneous exit, with no delays, frills,

risks or pain -- and they got it. They had either reached the point where
there was no more to be gained by staying, or where it got to be intolerable
to continue. Or, conversely, they became involved with a karmic tie with
someone at their own or the other person’s instigation.

In most cases, it reflects the effects of a strong programming to be self-

defeating and self-sabotaging by a rejecting and dysfunctional family. When
it was a pre-chosen outcome by the soul, it reflects the powerful intrauterine
and subsequent message that they have no business being here in the first
place.

*************************************

304
“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up as the result of the “random
generator” which sets off events that are neither the result of the Divine
Intent nor of the play-outs of our wills. The purpose is to continuously
challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be noted in this
regard that “shinola happens” too.

DEATH IN CHILDBIRTH (Of the mother)

“OK, I got you here. Now it’s up to you.” It is the honoring of an agreement
with the child’s soul for them to leave at birth, so that the child’s destiny
can play out.

*************************************

“Too much to handle.” This represents an overwhelm reaction by a mother,

who was already suffering from a severe case of felt insufficient support
that was characteristic of her whole life.

*************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

“DEEP VEIN THROMBOSIS” DVT (See “TRAVELER’S

THROMBOSIS”)

DEGENERATION OF THE SPINAL CORD AND MUSCLES;

DEGENERATIVE DISORDERS

“I don’t DARE!” They have severe annihilation-anxiety around the issue of

seeking, manifesting and especially acknowledging success. They have the
utter conviction they are “turd of the Universe,” and that they have no
worth whatsoever. They deny their success, and they are totally unwilling to
accept their self-worth.

305
They are completely immobilized by “betrayal avoidance,” in that the
family, the mother in particular, conveyed to them very clearly that any
form of self-manifestation, success in the world, and commitment
elsewhere would destroy the family.

It started at a time when there was in their experience no difference between

their mother and the Universe, so that in effect, they would be committing
“Deicide” if they seek success or recognize their worth -- they would be
destroying God and all of its creation. So to avoid that ultimate calamity,
they are sacrificing themselves on the alter of “filial piety.”

DEGENERATIVE JOINT DISORDER (DJD) [Arthritis-like]

“Straight-jacketed.” They have a pronounced tendency to immobilization,

self-criticism, lack of self-worth, fear, anger and a feeling of being tied
down, restricted and confined. They are self-suppressing and self-thwarting.
They are not allowing themselves to develop their full potential, due to self-
distrust, leading to severe constraints. They desperately want to be free to
move around and to make something of themselves, but they won’t let
themselves.

They feel unloved, with a resulting resentful bitterness and a critical

judgmentalness towards others. They are suffering from a lot of suppressed
resentment, which tends to result in passive-aggressive behavior. They are
chronically anxious and depressed, and they are afraid of being angry
because it is “wrong, bad and evil.” They are the product of perfectionistic
parenting in which in effect they could never measure up.

***************************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are feeling rejected for what they are,
in the sense of being totally unappreciated. They are feeling very victimized
and put upon, and they experience a lack of love. They feel somehow that
they will never receive the acceptance, validation and affection they need.
They are the product of a systematically rejecting family system.

***************************************

306
“Fight or flight.” They are immersed in a strong reaction to their situation,
and they are chronically anxious. They feel that things have gotten out of
hand, and that they can’t regain control. They feel that they can’t do
anything to change their circumstances, and they are utterly frustrated with
the way their life is going. They have no trust of the “Home Office,” and
they feel that “It is botching the job.” Underneath all this is a feeling of
utter powerlessness and a severe self-and other-rejection arising from their
being treated as the “intimate enemy” by their family.

***************************************

“Repressed rage.” They are full of suppressed resentment and anger and
they have a strongly squashed desire to hit someone. They continuously
ruminate and recriminate over their “indignities,” and they cling to every
item like “super-glue.” They have a chronic bitterness and resentment, and
they are forever sending out arrows of hatred, jealousy, general discord and
other negative vibrations.

Their mind is wound up so tight in their hostile preoccupations that it grinds

their whole system to a halt, and they are constantly suppressing their desire
to strike out and hit people. They are pushing another person around, or
they are being pushed around by another person. They are the product of an
intensely hostile home.

***************************************

“Rigidly fixated.” They are manifesting intense and resistance to change in

the direction of their life. They are unbending, locked in their position, and
unable to move, out of a fear of what lies ahead and out of a refusal to
surrender to the processes of life. They have a basic distrust of themselves
and/or of the Universe, and they decidedly do not like the way things are
headed.

As a result, there is no ease of movement in their functioning or in their

moving through the changes in their life. Their force-flows of life are not
fluid or flexible, and there is a lack of presence and gracefulness in their
functioning.

307
However, the changes in direction of their life are in response to multi-life
issues that they haven’t been able to handle, and that now must be handled.
Their reaction to this situation is based on having come up in a rigidly
patriarchal and conservative family.

***************************************

“Right and righteous.” They are very blaming and critical of people, and
they are convinced that others won’t help them. They are quite fixed,
unbending, intolerant and resistive in their functioning. They are quite
angry that people won’t “carry their load,” so that they have to take on what
they consider an unjust load.

They are full of projected self-disgust, finding in others what they most
dislike in themselves. There are long-standing maladjustments and stony
incrustations based on internal conflicts -- often between a desire to do
something and a fear of failure. They have great resistance and emotional
struggle, with habitual anxiety and fear, “negative faith,” and expectations
that of the worst case scenario.

They operate with a strong will, inflexible intentions, intense opinions, and
an abiding inability to change with changing circumstances. They have a
bad case of the “hardening of the attitudes,” and they are highly rigid,
opinionated and “hung up in principles.” They are forcefully opinion-
pushing, and they put out a steady stream of skeptical criticism. They are
quite hostile, and they are always angry and tense. Calcium growths
indicate the presence of hatred and a severely inflexible mind.

It all came from a “vast wasteland” and “dour destiny” type of family
culture in which they never knew when something would go wrong, just
that it would, sure as the sun rises. It all fell to them to do the necessaries
because no one else could be trusted to do so or to do it right. No one was
ever there for them, and since everything that went down was their fault,
they also felt they didn’t deserve anyone to be there for them, bottom line.

*****************************************

308
“Will of iron.” They have a very strong will and very strong opinions that
they will not and probably cannot change. They are unbending in their
expression and self-manifestation. They never let go of anything, as they try
to be the “boss of the Universe” an effort to make life just the way they
want it. They grew up in a highly inflexible patriarchal and perhaps
authoritarian family, and they “identified with the aggressor.”

*****************************************

“Super-glue injustice-nurturing.” They feel rejected for what they are, in the
sense of being totally unappreciated. They are full of repressed resentment
and anger, and they have a suppressed desire to hit someone. They
continuously ruminate and recriminate over their “indignities,” and they
cling to every item. They come from a severely injustice-nurturing
dysfunctional family.

*****************************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They are forever sending out arrows of hatred,

jealousy, general discord, and other negative vibrations. Their mind is
wound up so tight in their hostile preoccupations that it grinds their whole
system to a halt. Underneath all this is a feeling of utter powerlessness and a
severe self-and other-rejection arising from their being treated as the
“intimate enemy” by their family. They are the product of an intensely
hostile home. (Also see JOINT PROBLEMS)

DEHYDRATION (Severe thirstiness -- perhaps even lethally so -- due to

lack of water)

“Left high and dry.” They experience life as one long threat. They feel that
something disastrous is imminent, and that they are like a fish out of water,
in that they feel they don’t have what it takes to handle it.

It has been this way all their life, starting in their unpredictably destructive
family in which there was much subterranean, subconscious and subtle
subterfuge and sabotage going down. No one saw or knew what was
happening, just that they couldn’t tell when the next piece of traumatic

309
excrement was going to come off the fan. At any moment something awful
could happen, and they have to be on constant at least “yellow alert.”

DEATH BY DEHYDRATION

“Scared to death.” In the worst case scenario, death by dehydration, they

ended up “blown out of the saddle.” In other words, their life was so
intolerably alarming that they had to terminate it to escape the devastatingly
terrifying nature of their situation.

**********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

DELIRIUM (Loss of reality contact to the accompaniment of great

agitation)

“Spring-release.” They are engaged in a sudden outburst of repressed or

suppressed deep desires or dreads. They are in the grips of that which they
have systematically shoved into their “shadow” or “sat on.” It is being
triggered by a situation which contains elements of the circumstances which
led to the repression or suppression in the first place. They are the product
of an oppressive and/or denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

DELIRIUM TREMENS (“D.T.’s” -- Alcohol withdrawal symptoms of

anxiety, sweating, hallucinations, trembling, etc.)

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are afraid of “losing it” in such a way as to

result in catastrophic acting out and its results. They are also accessing their
“shadow” and their subconscious/unconscious/collective consciousness --
particularly the terrible/terrifying aspects thereof -- and they are
overwhelmed with implication reactions.

310
It is the result of a severely dysfunctional addictive family system in which
there was a great deal of denial, suppression and repression required in
order for everyone to continue functioning.

DEMENTIA (Loss of mental functions)

“Take this job and shove it!” They are manifesting a refusal to deal with the
world as it is, out of an enraged helplessness and hopelessness. They feel
overwhelmed by the requirements of life and unable to cope any more.

There is a great deal of bitterness and disgust with the Universe and the
“Home Office.” There is a good deal of anger, resentment and bitterness
involved here. They are tired of the fight, and they are having an “I’m
taking my marbles and going home!” reaction. They kept up as long as they
could, and now they have decided that enough is enough.

This is a pattern that got started early in life, when they had to face an
uncaring and even hostilely demanding environment, which had a
demoralizing effect on them. Their response to this set up a self-fulfilling
prophecy effect in which they repeatedly found themselves in repetitions of
their formative environment. (See ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE; SENILITY)

DEMENTIA DUE TO H.I.V. VIRUS (Deteriorating and slowing of mental

functions)

“Gradually leaving.” They have a strong belief in not being good enough,
with much self-intolerance, self-rejection and self-destructive potentials.
There is also sexual guilt imposed by an over-possessive yet simultaneously
rejecting and wrong-making mother. It is in effect a severe maternal
deprivation and denigration reaction. They therefore are “following orders”
and leaving the planet by self-harming degrees.

DENGUE (Yellow fever-like tropical disease carried by mosquito)

“Enough, already!” They are “blown out” and “blown away” by life’s
tribulations and traumas. They have the pronounced feeling that they just
can’t take it any more. They feel that they have been constantly attacked,
accused and abused all of their life.

311
They have withdrawn into themselves with a “Wall of China” around their
heart and their “emotional body.” They have reached the point where they
are rejecting their situation and life’s requirements and responsibilities.
They are deeply resentful of the way their life has gone, and they are on the
verge of “bowing out.” It is the result of having been the “family hoist” in a
rejecting, wrong-making and exploitative dysfunctional family, with a
resulting propensity to take on too much responsibility and to be targeted
for blame and exploitation.

DERMATITIS (Skin inflammation)

“I hate my life!” They are in the grips of suppressed irritation or repressed

anger trying to find expression. The anger is often more towards themselves
than towards others. Someone or something is getting under their skin,
irritating and frustrating them, upsetting them, and alarming them. It brings
up old fears and insecurities that are reinforcing their repression. It also has
the effect of putting a barrier between them and others. It is a pattern that
got started as a child in their wrong-making and chronically dysfunctional
family.

DETACHED RETINA

“Retinal retaliation.” They are experiencing a “backlash” for insisting on

seeing clearly despite severe “Don’t see!” injunctions from their intensely
dysfunctional and denial-dominated family. They have crossed a “taboo
line” into forbidden territory of clarity of comprehension and perception in
areas they were supposed to never see, and an “implanted booby trap” has
gone off.

RIGHT EYE RETINA DETACHED

“I see, I see!” They saw too much of the realities of the world that was in
direct contradiction of their family’s worldview.

LEFT EYE RETINA DETACHED

“NOW I know who I am!” They found out the truth about what and who
they are, and about what their role and destiny is.

312
DEVIATED SEPTUM (The cartilage divider between the nostrils)

“Awareness-avoidance.” They are coming from “Keep your nose out of

other people’s business!” programming. They found out early on that any
exploration of the whys and wherefores of things led to “dynamite shed
explosion” reactions when they tried to “strike a match of enlightenment” in
their denial-dominated family.

They are of an intensely inquiring mind by nature, which has caused them
great internal conflict, all of their life. It has also caused the deviation of
their septum from its normal location and nature.

DEVIATED TO THE RIGHT

“Mind your P’s & Q’s!” They were given strong injunctions not to know
their own inner life and nature, to focus unduly on their role in the world at
the expense of their true nature.

DEVIATED TO THE LEFT

“Mind your own business!” They were not to rock the boat by noting what
was happening around them, so they were in effect driven into introverted
and introspective functioning to an unnatural degree.

DHEA PROBLEMS (Dehydroepiandrosterone) [Precursor or pro-hormone

that triggers, buffers, interacts with, and regulates other hormones. It is a
key chemical for the life process.]

“What’s the use?” They are harboring deep grief and a sense of underlying
despair and demoralization. They have a demoralized resignation attitude in
the making or in their manifestation. They are overwhelmed by too much
sorrow, and by the “running on empty” effect of a severe inequality of
energy exchange with the world, whereby they put out much more than they
get. They have effectively given up on life, feeling that they have no ability
to determine or control anything. They feel that they are just simply
insufficient to the cause, and they can’t care any more.

313
It is a result of having carried the world on their shoulders all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family, with little or no ability to receive or
to request or to require a return in kind. They were told in effect they were
the source of all the family’s problems while actually being the only one
deflecting some of the disasters.

DIABETES – TYPE I (Pancreatic problems and insufficient insulin

production)

“Boulevard of broken dreams.” They are longing for what might have been
in their life, and they are in a state of emotional shock. They have a deep
dissatisfaction with their life, and an accompanying self-dislike. There is
intense sorrow, and a sense of starving to death in the midst of plenty, of
being surrounded by most of the things that have meaning without their
being available to them.

They have a great deal of despairing desperation, depression and

demoralization. It’s a “but not for me” attitude that is often accompanied by
a fair amount of feeling very sorry for themselves. There is no sweetness
left in life for them, and there is insufficient joy in their life. They are stuck
on an ideal image of what life should be like, and they feel that their quality
of life has been taken away from them. They are the product of a
demoralizingly dysfunctional and depriving environment.

*************************************

“One strike and I’m out!” They have a great need to control, arising from
feeling alone and on their own in an indifferent/hostile world. They operate
out of fatalistic expectations of further complications and debilitations in
their life.

At base, they feel they don’t deserve to have their needs met, which reflects
past life issues that have to be examined. They are joyless and super-
serious/somber in their orientation, with a lot of worry, anxiety and fear
about survival. They feel that there is an insufficiency of emotional support
and/or a loss, deprivation or non-requiting of love, with a resulting
starvation for affection and a suppressed grief.

314
This all got started when they experienced being an ejectee-rejectee-
dejectee “Martian” who was a very different soul from their mother. They
were at best ambivalently accepted from conception onward. They came
into the world and found they had to rear themselves because no one else
could or would. They became a “self-made person” who found little of
relevance, nurturance or validation for them.

*************************************

“Feel bad about my situation!” They have a need to be a “martyr,” in a

“share the misery” process. They utilize guilt-induction and bringing out
other people’s insecurities through condemnation of themselves and others
in a hypercritical stance.

They are deeply disappointed with their life, and they feel that things should
not have gone the way they have. They have become rather intensely
embittered and cynical in their orientation.

The result is a self-rejecting and rather scathingly angry individual who

now needs to re-examine assumptions about who they are and what life and
the Universe are all about. They were subjected to repeated traumatic
shocks in a severely self-immersed, dysfunctional and abusive/invasive/
violating family.

DIABETES -- TYPE II (Elevated insulin and insulin-resistance, with

elevated glucose)

“Love-starvation.” They have a desperate longing to belong, yet they are

intensely emotionally insulated. They also experience much social isolation,
with a resulting self-sustaining self-nurturance pattern. They are a severely
self-protective “urban hermit” who was continuously blamed, in an, “If it
weren’t for you...!” pattern.

They ended up believing that they don’t deserve any better, so they have
withdrawn into themselves and away from emotional/social involvement on
any close or vulnerable level. They have turned to self-maintaining love-
substitutes such as carbohydrates, sugars and pasta and/or their body has
become insulin-resistant.

315
“DIAPER RASH”

“Neglected/rejected.” They are being treated as if they aren’t important

enough to be paid attention to. They are subject to abandonment-anxiety
attacks of one degree or another. They may be experiencing some sex-
ploitative aspects of their parenting process. In all cases, they feel alone on
their own -- and it hurts. It comes from family circumstances and/or
maternal personality patterns involving their being placed too low on the
list of priorities.

DIAPHRAGM PROBLEMS (Breathing difficulties, pain on breathing, etc.)

“Lying low.” There is intense self-repression and fear of expression. In

addition, they have a pronounced tendency to reject reality out of a fear of
what would happen if they allowed the facts of their situation to penetrate to
their inner core.

They are rather shallow and lacking in depth of manifestation, due to dread
of what would happen if they were to go with the flow of life. They operate
in an intensely self-restrictive and self-immersed manner. It comes from
having grown up in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family in which it
was literally dangerous to be themselves or to experience reality.

DIARRHEA

“Here it comes!” They are faced with a heavy and meaningful task; they
wish it were over and done with. Something important is pending, and they
don’t want to go through with it. They have a fair amount of competence-
anxiety and built-in programming against success and intimacy.

They were supposed to stick around the old homestead and take care of
their parents. Any move towards independence, self-empowerment, and
significant involvement/contribution/commitment activates annihilation-
anxiety and betrayal-guilt. The current situation is just such a requirement
and issue for them.

*************************************

316
“Get out of my life!” They need to get rid of some duty, some obligation or
some other thing in their life. They are desperately trying to clear the toxic
systems, situations and people out of their life. They want to get this over
with so as to return to a desired routine. They are in effect seeking to escape
the situation and running away from the requirements involved.

They tend to be compulsively orderly and sameness-demanding in their

functioning. However, they want to “throw the baby out with the bath” as
they reject the past, and they try to get rid of ideas too rapidly. They want to
get the whole thing over with in a hurry, and they are rushing it.

There is an underlying passivity and desire not to be bothered, and they are
acutely fearful of their situation. They are the product of a competence-and
confidence-undermining enmeshed dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Shooting the rapids.” They are feeling overwhelmed, that things are
moving too fast. They are intensely rejecting of the possibilities in front of
them. They are fearful, and they want to run off, to get away from all this.
They don’t want to assimilate and absorb what they are experiencing. They
feel in over their head much of the time, and they are easily flattened by
experiences. They are the product of over-protective and possessive
parenting in which they were systematically programmed to be unable to
cope with life’s demands. (See SPASTIC COLON; “THE TROTS”)

DIFFICULTY SWALLOWING

“Look before you leap.” They are manifesting an unwillingness to

“swallow” things in a “hook, line and sinker” manner. They learned in their
dysfunctional family not to take things at face value, and to toe test so as to
not get taken in by what seems to be going down. The result, however, is
that they now have difficulty accepting anything for fear of being “had”
again.

GETTING FOOD, PILLS, ETC., STUCK IN THEIR THROAT

317
“Wizard of Ought.” They are caught up in their pictures of how things
should be, with the result that they are focused on desired outcomes or the
next event or undertaking, as they try to do too much at once or too fast,
and not paying attention to the process of the moment. They are not present
in themselves in the realities of now, as they run their life out of their
conceptions of how things ought to be. It is a pattern that got started in a
judgmental and achieve-aholic family.

DIFFICULTY WITH BREAST FEEDING

“Ambivalence about motherhood.” They have a lot of resentment about the

demands and drains of mothering, and as a result they are subconsciously
looking to the infant for the succorance they never got. It is a case of not
being able to do for others what was never done for you. The key factor
here is that the nurturing attitude was missing, regardless of their history of
breast or bottle feeding.

***************************************

“Used, abused and loosed.” They are manifesting a fear of rejection and
abandonment because of becoming an “asexual object.” This arises out of a
“romancing the stone” relationship with her father, in which he was very
conditional in his functioning with her, so that she got the loud and clear
message that she is acceptable ONLY IF...

***************************************

“I don’t think I can handle you.” There is an ambivalent or rejecting attitude

towards this particular infant as a function of a clash between the infant’s
characteristics and the mother’s life history and dynamics, or because of the
circumstances surrounding this child’s being in her life.

DIGESTIVE ENZYME PROBLEMS

“But not for me.” They have real difficulties assimilating life’s nutrients.
Their experience is they don’t deserve to live and that they have to earn
their supper. It comes from their having served as the “family hoist” holding
up their dysfunctional, exploitative and accusatory family.

318
DIGESTIVE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“I can’t take that in.” There are difficulties with assimilation of experiences
and inputs, due to generalized dread, repressed rage and/or despairing
depression. They are the product of a family who in effect placed their
needs last, and who were up to their eyebrows in continuous stress. (See
COLON PROBLEMS; DUODENUM PROBLEMS; ILEITIS;
ILEEOCECAL VALVE PROBLEMS; SMALL INTESTINE PROBLEMS;
STOMACH PROBLEMS; ULCERS)

DIPHTHERIA (Swollen nose and throat -- often occurring in childhood)

“In over their head.” They are suffering from felt helplessness, along with a
sense of powerlessness to do anything about their significant close
relationships. They have much frustration over restrictions, requirements
and rejections, along with abandonment-anxiety. They feel that they can’t
be themselves without losing the love-line support they need.

In an adult, this represents a lifelong issue that started in childhood in a

suppressive and demanding family. In a child, it represents their currently
living in such an environment.

DISCHARGE FROM THE NOSE (FOUL-SMELLING)

“There’s something rotten in the state of Denmark!” They have feelings of

systematic persecution and victimization, along with a deep-seated grief,
shame and subconscious self-rejection. They have become a self-fulfilling
prophecy on wheels, in the form of eliciting the very rejection and
discriminatory treatment they are expecting. It is the result of a subtly
scapegoating and victim-blaming dysfunctional family.

DISCOLORATION OF THE SKIN (Due to blood seepage under the

surface)

“Bad, wrong and evil.” It is a self-accusing and self-denigrating self-

rejection. They are harsh on themselves, and they feel that “There is
something wrong with this picture -- I’m still in it.” It is the result of
intensely neglectful and rejecting parenting from the very beginning.

319
DISC PROBLEMS (Spinal)

“I can’t handle it!” They are feeling outclassed and over-run by the
demands of life, and they are they seeking to put off, slide around or ignore
the requirements that give them the feeling they don’t have what it takes to
make it. It comes from having grown up in a household that either asked far
too much or far too little of them. (See HERNIATED DISC; SLIPPED
DISC also see SPINAL DISC PROBLEMS for information on the specific
disc(s) involved)

DISSEMINATED SCLEROSIS (Patches of hard tissue in the central

nervous system)

“I don’t DARE!” They are experiencing severe annihilation-anxiety around

the issue of seeking, manifesting, and especially acknowledging success.
They have the utter conviction they are the “turd of the Universe,” and that
they have no worth whatsoever. They deny their success, and they are
totally unwilling to accept their self-worth.

They are in effect completely immobilized by “betrayal avoidance,” in that

the family, the mother in particular, conveyed to them very clearly that any
form of self-manifestation, success in the world or commitment elsewhere
would destroy them.

It started at a time when there was in their experience no difference between

their mother and the Universe, so that in effect, they would be committing
Deicide if they seek success or recognize their worth -- e.g., destroying God
and all Its creation. So to avoid that ultimate calamity, they are sacrificing
themselves on the alter of “filial piety.”

DISRUPTION OF MOTION

“Oh no you don’t!” They are experiencing the effects of a severe injunction
against taking action in the world. It came in early in their childhood, and it
remained in force throughout their formative process. (See the part(s) of the
body affected for more information)

DIVERTICULITIS (See LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS)

320
“DIZZINESS”

“Flying off in all directions.” Reality has become overwhelming, and they
have lost their sense of center, stability and groundedness. There is no
feeling of balance and harmony, and mental confusion and flighty, scattered
thinking due to outside pressures has resulted.

They are refusing to look things squarely in the eye, and they don’t want to
have to deal with things as they are. They feel threatened by life’s demands
and realities. It feels very unsafe to them, and that it is impossible for them
to have joy in their life.

Now they are faced with a high intensity and/or high stakes decision,
commitment, undertaking or experience, and they are feeling overwhelmed,
overloaded and unable to cope.

It is a pattern that got started in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family in

which they were required to function in the face of chaos and the refusal to
deal with reality.

“DOWN THE WRONG TUBE” (Getting food or liquid in the esophagus)

“Attempted diversion.” They are being upset by whatever is going down in

their mind, in the environment, or in the conversation, and they are trying to
prevent its continuance. They are trying not to have to swallow what is
happening. They grew up in a highly dysfunctional household in which they
were forced to take in many unsavory things.

*************************************

“Overwhelmed.” They feel that life’s demands are getting to be too much
for them, and that their circumstances are more than they can handle at
present. It is a re-appearance of an experience that once was the warp and
woof of their life. They are the product of a pessimistic parenting pattern.

*************************************

321
“Maybe I should leave.” They are experiencing a resurgence of very early
self-rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong-
making and rejecting maternal parenting.

CHOKING TO DEATH ON FOOD OR DRINK

“Time to leave.” They had the feeling that they had completed what they
could do here, and that they had nothing more to do, so they left. It was a
destiny completion reaction.

*******************************

“I couldn’t keep up.” They felt utterly overwhelmed by life and their
circumstances, and they felt there is no way they could meet the demands
being made of them. Or they felt that there was no way they could realize
their destiny, due to circumstances beyond their control.

It was a re-appearance of an experience that once was the “warp and woof”
of their life, but it reached the point where they felt they simply didn’t have
what it takes to make it and/or that there was simply no point in continuing.
They were the product of a highly nihilistic and pessimistic parenting
pattern.

*******************************

“I should leave.” They were experiencing a resurgence of very early self-

rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong-
making and rejecting maternal parenting -- only this time they decided she
was right, and they took the ultimate step.

*******************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

322
“DOWNWIND SYNDROME” (See RADIATION SICKNESS)

DROOLING

“Pain-drain.” They are suffering love-and nurturance-starvation due to

maternal deprivation. Ironically, it often occurs in the context of an over-
protective and/or confidence-undermining parenting pattern. The point is
that there was severe emotional non-support and effectiveness-
preventioning from their family as they were growing up.

“DROP-FOOT” (Unable to raise their foot, due to paralysis of the calf

muscles)

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have a “Leave well enough alone! – It’s

bad enough as it is without making any further trouble!” attitude. They are
immobilized with implication-paranoia. They fear taking any action, lest all
hell break loose.

They are intensely growth-avoidant and excessively conservative, with a

sense that their basic values and beliefs are being betrayed. They are so
entrenched in their stance that they have literally paralyzed themselves.

It is the result of their having come up in calamity-courting dysfunctional

family who were constantly bringing the roof down on their own heads.
They found they could do nothing to deflect disaster, so they took the
position that “no news is good news,” and they have dug in for the long
haul in a “trench warfare” experience of life.

“DROPSY” (Fluid in the abdomen)

“Holding on.” They are not letting go of something or someone, and they
are engaged in resistance to changes. They are hanging on to the past, for
fear that if they let go, something awful will happen.

It comes from a fear that any change will result in the loss of even more in
their life. They’d rather keep things as they are than take a chance they will
end up with nothing -- which is what they fully expect is their “just
desserts” for all the “failures of their care-taking” represented by the

323
negative events in their family’s history. The water retention is stored grief
from this whole situation and life history.

*************************************

“Over-burdened.” They are carrying a heavy load on their shoulders, an

overload of responsibility. They want to share the load, but are afraid to ask
for fear of alienating and losing what support they do have. They are
therefore desperate for love and afraid of the loss of love.

It’s a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern in which they were held accountable

and responsible for the needs and situations of everyone and everything in
their family. The only support they got came from just that “unsung
hero(ine)” role in a “serve-aholic” situation.

DROWNING

“All my sorrows.” They were overwhelmed by the grief, sadness and/or

despair that marked their life, and they unconsciously decided to put an end
to it by embracing it, so to speak. It is the result of early emotional
deprivation, maternal neglect and/or intense rejection.

*************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our wills. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

“DRY HEAVES” (Unproductive vomiting attempts)

“Futile efforts.” They are making unsuccessful attempts to rid themselves of

a situation. They are violently refusing to accept the current developments,
because to them it indicates that something dreadful is about to happen. It
just means more responsibility, trauma and pain, and they are having a fear
and disgust reaction to what is happening to them.

324
They feel it is their own fault that this situation exists, and they are
desperately trying to convince themselves that it really isn’t happening. But
it isn’t working, and their misery is compounding on itself.

Their family made them accountable and responsible for everything, and
they had to live with the finger of accusation every time something went
wrong -- which was frequently, in their out of control dysfunctional family.

DRY MOUTH (Lack of saliva)

“Love is a poison apple.” They have a deep disappointment and disgust

over lack of support and not being able to tell it like it is. They have decided
that there is no such thing as real nourishment. They are not ready to accept
what the universe is providing them.

They are therefore sealed off from taking in any proffered support or any
new ideas. Everything fails to “pass the taste test” as far as they are
concerned -- they want to stay in their comfort zone. They have become
contemptuously closed-minded, set in their opinions, secretive, selfish, and
unwilling to change. It is the outcome of a highly negative experience with
their untrustworthy, denial-dominated, dysfunctional family and their
subsequent standins.

DRY MOUTH (Where the tongue sticks to the roof and it feels sticky)

“High and dry.” They are having a bad case of fear and anticipation-anxiety.
They sense that something dangerous or punitive is imminent, and they feel
like a fish out of water, in that they fear they don’t have what it takes to
handle it.

This feeling came from having to deal with a family in which there was
much subterranean, subconscious and subtle subterfuge and sabotage
occurring that no one saw or knew was happening.

It left them feeling that nothing is as it seems, and that at any moment
something awful could happen, and they can’t do anything to head it off at
the pass. They just have to handle it like an ever-vigilant “hockey goalie.”

325
DRY SKIN

“Implication-anxiety.” They live with a dread of upcoming events and with

the anticipation of attack. They feel overwhelmed and powerless to stop or
re-direct the flow of negative events, and they therefore have a “first hit”
reaction that all hell is going to break loose any time anything new and
significant is about to happen.

They have withdrawn into themselves as a result. They have a real fear of
the unknown, and expecting the worst is a pattern that got started in a home
where the worst did indeed often happen, due to significant
dysfunctionality. (See the body part(s) affected for more information)

“D.T.s” (See DELIRIUM TREMENS)

DUODENUM PROBLEMS

“Unmet dependency needs.” They have a profound sense of being alone on

their own in a depriving and uncaring world. As a result, they seek to “keep
on truckin,” but there is a growing sense of overwhelm and futility
developing as time goes by. Now it is breaking through into intense
deprivation-resentment and/or deprivation-resignation. It is the product of
significant early deprivation/neglect and/or maternal deprivation or parent-
loss.

DUODENAL ULCER (Hole in the first part of intestine)

“Down and out.” They are suffering from complete remorse and sadness
over-coming them, and they are on the verge of giving up, in a “Why go
on?” feeling. There is marked maternal dependency and mother-fixation.

They have taken on an approval-earning compulsive compensation via

meticulous, industrious ambitiousness strategy, which produces intense
dependency-independency conflicts.

They wanted to catch up or at least to get even. They felt that they don’t get
what they should, and they wanted to do unto others what was done to
them, if nothing else. Even that has failed them, though, and they have now

326
come close to collapse. There is an extreme need for nurturance and
affection arising from a history of parent-loss or its equivalent.

DYSANTINONIA (See UNCONTROLLABLE RESPONSES FROM THE

CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM)

DYSENTERY -- AMOEBIC (Severe diarrhea caused by amoeba)

“What NEXT!?” They have a lot of anxiety about their current situation,
and they are very fearful of the world. They have a lot of fear and intense
anger over the “fact” that “They are out to get me.” They feel attacked and
endangered, and they feel powerless to do anything about it. They feel they
have no authority and no clout in their world. It is a feeling that they have
had all of their life, starting in a self-immersed and seemingly indifferent or
even hostile family.

DYSENTERY -- BACILLARY (Severe diarrhea caused by bacteria)

“Hapless helplessness.” There is a feeling of utter oppression and hopeless

overwhelm. Their experience is that it is a very unjust world in which they
are constantly dealt with unfairly. They feel that there is no point to trying
to make things any better, because nothing ever works anyway. It is a
demoralized “Why bother? It won’t make any difference anyway attitude”
derived from a similarly nihilistic family culture.

DYSKINESIA (Uncoordinated involuntary movements)

“Oh no you don’t!” They have “crossed the forbidden line” into self-
commitment and destiny manifestation, and a long-ago implanted
injunction to the effect of “If you ever violate this taboo, a hex on you!”
from their family has gone off. They were to never abandon the family by
bonding with relevant others, developing their capacities, or moving into
manifestation of their purpose.

DYSLEXIA (Inability to read -- inability to perceive written material

correctly)

327
“Street smart.” They are too concerned with pragmatic survival to pay
attention to the abstract world. They were left to their own devices
emotionally and/or physically as an infant and child, and the result are that
they never had the leisure or the stimulation to develop their symbolic
perception function adequately. The outcome is a developmental
deprivation effect that results in difficulty in learning to read. They don’t
care whether the ball or the stick comes first -- whether it’s a “b” or a “d.”

RIGHT HEMISPHERE (PERCEPTUAL) DYSLEXIA [Accurate but slow]

“Canny comprehension.” They had to be responsible for accurate readouts

of what was going on emotionally and practically in a kind of emotional
survival situation. They are intensely emotionally attuned and concerned
with handling things “right.”

LEFT HEMISPHERE (CONCEPTUAL) DYSLEXIA [Quick but error

prone]

“Street survivor.” They learned early on to make the right moves with other
people, to “fake it to make it” in a kind of handling situations any way that
“got them through the night” or out of the pickle. They are intensely tuned
in on the situation-handling level, including emotional issues that have to be
“handled.” (See INABILITY TO PHONETICALLY SOUND OUT
WORDS)

DYSTONIA (Slow, repetitive, sustained muscle contractions that often lead

to “freezing” in the middle of an action via twisting, turning and torsion
movements. It is the result of genetic problems in most cases, though some
have had lack of oxygen at birth or later in life.)

“They’ll KILL me!” They have a real fear of the consequences of putting it
out there, involving anticipation of attack, and expectation of harmful
events on the environment of the output, catastrophic predictions about
what will happen within or to them, and/or a conviction that to become
successful will betray their family.

Their attempt to restore some semblance of success in their life has

activated an “Oh no you don’t!” sub-routine designed to prevent them from

328
ever engaging in self-committed destiny-manifestation. It is the result of the
“dynamite shed effect” (where they find themselves in a pitch black space
with rough-hewn boxes, skinny ropes and a funny smell, and they light a
match to see where they are…).

They became afraid of “putting it out there” when they were a child in their
denial-dominated “keep ‘em around the old homestead” possessive family,
in which they were never to succeed their way away from home. “So you
think you got away, do you?” They were severely programmed by their
family to fail in all attempts at effective functioning.

Section 4

329
330
D

155

331
332
D

156

157

158

159

160

161

162

163

333
164

165

166

167

168

169

170

334
EARLY MENOPAUSE

“I’ve got WORK to do!” They are in effect ending their period of physical
generativity to make room for other forms of generativity (contributing to
tomorrow). They feel completed with the physical form of generativity
and/or they are not to do child rearing because their destiny calls for other
contributions now.

************************************

“Right to MY life!” They want no more kids or no possibility of any kids in

their life. They are becoming totally focused on manifesting THEIR identity
and destiny from now on. They may or may not have been involved in the
“eternal maternal” pattern, but they definitely do not intend for it to be the
pattern of their life now. If they were caught up in the eternal maternal trip,
it was imposed extremely early in their life as a “God says so!” requirement
from their family.

************************************

“Enough, already!” They are going into early retirement. They are
exhausted and/or fed up, and they want to kick back, and not to have to
handle any more “command generation” demands. They have had it with
sexuality, generativity and/or contributory responsibilities. It is an “up to
the eyebrows” response to responsibility; it reflects an overloaded pattern
started by a severely demanding family.

*************************************

“Eternal girl.” They don’t want to be grown up. It arose from a

possessive/enmeshing relationship with their mother.

*************************************

“Femininity-rejection.” They feel that the sexual/childbearing aspects of

themselves are not acceptable manifestations. They were subjected to
intensely patriarchal treatment as a child and later in their life, and they

335
react now with rageful refusal to “play the game” any more and/or with
revulsion towards the feminine.

*************************************

“Buzz off, buster!” They are thoroughly enraged with the paranoid
patriarchy, with the “tripods” of the world and/or with sexuality and its
patterns. They are therefore shutting down sexually (which of course is not
at all involved in menopause normally). They have “had it up to the
eyebrows,” and it is an up which they will no longer put. This can come
from either a lifetime of victimization and sex-ploitation and/or from an
underlying massive rage reaction to sexuality from early sex-ploitation,
abuse and/or negative attitudinal training.

*************************************

“Checking out.” They are winding down and getting ready to leave. They
are tired, disgusted or self-rejecting. If they are tired of it all, it may arise
from having had to shoulder the world all their life and they are like a worn
out horse. If it is a generalized revulsion reaction, it may reflect a severely
cynical and/or abusive upbringing. If it is a self-elimination process, it is the
result of intensely denigrating and/or accusatory parenting.

EARACHE

“Hearing-fearing.” What they are hearing is causing them great inner pain.
They feel that they are surrounded by internal and/or external discord and
conflict, and they are “fed up to the ears” with it all. They feel accountable
for the conflict and responsible for its resolution, but they feel unable to do
anything about it, and so they now are hypersensitive to conflict and
turmoil. It reminds them too much of their parents arguing and the absence
of peace, harmony, and love in their family. Or they are experiencing that
currently as a child.

RIGHT EARACHE

“I don’t want to hear it!” They are shutting out environmental discord.

336
LEFT EARACHE

“I don’t want to deal with it!” They are avoiding internal conflict and
turmoil.

EAR DRAINAGE

“It’s hurting me!” They are having an intense pain and grief reaction to
what they are hearing or receiving as input. They feel in some way
responsible for their pain, such as having to do something about it, but they
don’t see a way to do so. It comes from having grown up in a family in
which much many deep hurts have been revealed, witnessed or experienced
about which they could do nothing.

RIGHT EAR DRAINAGE

“Your pain is my pain.” They are acutely experiencing the pains of the
world around them.

LEFT EAR DRAINAGE

“I hear you!” They are intensely feeling the pain of hearing about how they
cause others suffering, in their mind if nothing else.

EAR INFECTION

“Input-deflecting.” They are angrily shutting out unwanted inner or outside

inputs and messages, because they activate irritation, emotional upset,
conflict and disharmony. It is a truth they don’t want to hear.

They are manifesting stubbornness and a refusal to hear about what’s

happening in their life. They don’t like the idea that there’s something
wrong, and they refuse to hear about it. It is an old, familiar feeling due to
having grown up in a blame-throwing family in which any form of “non-
purity” and imperfection was the grounds for rejection and abuse.

RIGHT EAR INFECTION

“I don’ wanna know!” They are tuning out feedback from the environment.

337
LEFT EAR INFECTION

“Shut up in there!” They are refusing to pay attention to their “inner voice.”

EAR PROBLEMS

“I know what’s going on!” They have a hypersensitivity to the “music”

under what’s happening and/or of not being understood. They have intense
receptivity and a fear of not being able to hear what the true nature of the
situation is. They are carefully attuned to hear any and all information and
“secrets.”

They were shoved to the sidelines of their dysfunctional family early on

because of their perceptivity. There they became the “objective observer,”
the “mediator,” and the “comprehender” for the family.

*************************************

“Don’t you hurt me!” They are permanently traumatized by the nasty words
they have heard, and they are fearful of criticism. They are also intensely
resentful of all that rejection, negativity and pain. They therefore tend to
focus on the negative, and to be unsupportive and a gossip-monger.

They are firmly fixed in their belief in their utter separateness and their
“deservingness” of rejection by God because of their “negativity” and
“disobedience.” They are in a self-rejecting and self-isolating, in an “alone
and alien” pattern. They are separately alone, alien and alienated in what
feels like an unsupportive environment. This pattern got started in a family
in which they could do no right and yet which looked to them to be the
answer to all their problems.

*************************************

“Forget it!” They don’t want to hear any more, and they are systematically
understanding-avoidant. They also want to have their outlook heard -- they
want to coerce others to agree with them. They are the product of a severely
denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

338
RIGHT EAR PROBLEMS

“I don’t want to hear it!” They have a fear of and/or hypersensitivity to

environmental inputs.

LEFT EAR PROBLEMS

“I don’t want to know about me.” They have a fear of and/or

hypersensitivity to their personal characteristics or inner inputs.

EAR PROBLEMS -- EAR CANAL

“Unclear channel.” They are prone to distortions, selectivity, “creative

hearing” and obstructions to their ability to comprehend what is happening
around and within them. They are tending to become alarmed, enraged,
disgusted or even paranoid about their role in the world and in the Cosmos.
Their experience is that things are not going right, and it is significantly
upsetting them.

They have had a considerable history of thwarting, deprivation,

exploitation, abuse and accusation in the past, and they are afraid that it is
coming back. They are the product of an ambivalent, rejecting and/or
abusive dysfunctional family who programmed them to bring all manner of
difficulties down upon themselves.

RIGHT EAR CANAL

“What was that!?” Their experience is that things are going awry in their
world, and it is deeply alarming them.

LEFT EAR CANAL

“There I go AGAIN!” They are finding that they are becoming detrimental
to their own best interests of late.

EAR PROBLEMS -- EXTERNAL STRUCTURE

“Conform -- or else!” They are having conflicts with the structure of

society, in the form of feeling pressured to not be who they are. It’s an old,

339
familiar theme to them, since this has been the basis of much of their
learning history.

RIGHT EXTERNAL STRUCTURE EAR PROBLEM

“Rebellious child.” They are manifesting control-avoidance and

unwillingness to “march to other people’s drummers.”

LEFT EXTERNAL STRUCTURE EAR PROBLEM

“Sealed unit.” They are engaged in withdrawal within and vulnerability-

avoidance in a retreat from involvement.

EAR PROBLEMS -- INNER EAR STRUCTURE

“Inner misdirectedness.” They are finding themselves engaged in self-

deluding, disoriented, and/or misguided self-regulation. They are “missing
the mark” rather consistently, and they are increasingly agitated about it. It
reflects an intense need for re-prioritizing and re-evaluation of their life
direction and manifestation. The underlying cause is a self-misleading self-
direction system implanted at an early age by a possessive and
simultaneously rejecting family.

RIGHT INNER EAR STRUCTURE PROBLEM

“Self-misdirection.” They are being self-misleading in the manner in which

they manage their life and in which they make interventions. They have the
right formula for every situation -- only it isn’t really right.

LEFT INNER EAR STRUCTURE PROBLEM

“Self-deluding.” They are reality-redefining in a manner that is detrimental

to their functioning. They are bound to beliefs learned early in life in their
family.

EAR WATER PROBLEMS (Water in the ears)

“Repressed grief.” They are sitting on long-standing mourning for losses

and deprivations from gestation, infancy, childhood and beyond. They have

340
the belief that it is wrong, bad and evil to mourn for their hurts, pains and
emotional starvation.

Or they are afraid that they would cry themselves to death or that some
other calamity would result if they got in touch with the deep-seated grief.
It is the result of emotional neglect, deprivation or nurturance-withholding.

*********************************

“I don’ wanna know!” There is an inhibition of the ability to develop any

breadth of understanding and comprehension -- a pronounced propensity to
reject wisdom. They are doing a systematic refusal to know or understand.

There is also a frustrated inability to translate their feelings and intentions

into effective action. Their determination has found no place to go, and it
therefore has turned into resentment, and they are rather prone to blame.

This whole pattern arises from their having been in an “associate parent”
position in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family who would likely
explode and “blow apart at the seams” if the individual noted or expressed
any patterns, any understanding, or tried to make things work.

*********************************

“Great white hopes.” They are in effect giving up love in their life or from
some one dear to them for what they think are greater things. They are
intensely ambitious, prestige-conscious, driven by inner self-rejection
and/or poverty conscious. It arises from a family experience that put the
fear and dread of “Skid Row,” due to emotionally depriving and/or rejecting
parenting -- often at the subtle and subterranean level.

RIGHT EAR WATER

“Pain-avoidance.” They are engaged in efforts to not experience their

underlying grief about how things went and are going in the world around
them.

***************************

341
“Pass.” They are giving up love for external gains and concerns, due to their
finding that love is a four-letter word.

***************************

“Pissed off.” They have a lot of resentment of the way things work in the
world. They have a grim determination to make things happen THEIR way.
This came about when they found if they did things in the right way in their
family, they could make some progress.

LEFT EAR WATER

“Pain-avoidance.” They are engaged in efforts to not experience their

underlying grief about their deep inner wounds.

***************************

“I don’t need it.” They are giving up love for hoped for internal benefits
such as guilt-relief, expectations of inner comfort, etc., because love only
led to internal pain.

***************************

“I’ll get mine!” They have a lot of resentment about unmet needs and a
fierce determination to get their needs met, come what may. Their
experience was if they went after their needs in this way, sometimes it
would work.

EAR WAX PROBLEMS

“Self-shielding.” They are backing away from vulnerability and

involvement with the social environment because it is too irrelevant, painful
and/or dangerous. Their experience is what is being said and what is going
on with others is detrimental to their health and best interests.

They are much more comfortable with their own interpretations and way of
doing things than in allowing the environment to have an impact on their
lifestyle or belief system. They are a “sealed unit” who is self-determining
and a “self-made person.”

342
It is a pattern that got started when they were very young in a family in
which they were the “oddball” or the “odd one out.” They found that much
of what went on in the family was either irrelevant or detrimental to them.
Their family, in turn, often criticized and blamed them when anything went
wrong, and the result is they developed an “urban hermit” lifestyle.

RIGHT EAR WAX PROBLEM

“Forget it!” They are in disengagement from the world around them on the
grounds that it hurts too much to be vulnerable to the processes going on
out there.

LEFT EAR WAX PROBLEM

“Plexiglas barrier.” They are pulling into themselves, and they are putting
up a wall around themselves to prevent any further invasions and violations
of their self-system.

ITCHING EARS

“Urban hermit blues.” They are intensely involved in a deep-seated sense of

separateness and isolation, and they feel rejected by God because of their
negativity. As a result, they try to suppress or to take care of any and all of
their needs, wants and desires entirely on their own.

They have a great deal of guilt and shame for having these wants, and that
is now becoming quite intense as an issue. They feel that “God is not
pleased” with them because they are encountering needs and desires to
connect and form intimate relationships. Their experience is that this is “am
strengsten verboten,” (most strictly forbidden) yet they can’t continue to
suppress this growing motivation and manifestation. It is a matter of
considerable conflict for them at the present time.

This whole complex developed as a function of being relied upon

exploitatively as the “family hoist” while simultaneously being blamed for
everything that went wrong in the family. This occurred as a function of
being sufficiently superior in some way to their parents that they were
subconsciously placed in the “in loco Deity” position by their family. They

343
were literally unconsciously experienced as a “little God” who was
betraying the family when they “allowed” negative things to happen.

RIGHT EAR ITCHING

“Leave me alone!” They are being bothered by inputs from the environment
concerning their needs, wants and relationship-interest.

LEFT EAR ITCHING

“Vulnerability-alarm.” They are being alarmed by their inner thoughts and

feelings concerning the possibility of forming relationships.

MIDDLE EAR PROBLEMS

“I don’ wanna hear it!” They feel beset by unwanted and unwarranted
criticism, judgments, prescriptions, proscriptions, interpretations,
recommendations, etc. They experienced (or are experiencing) just this
situation as a child in their perfectionistic, rejecting, convenience-concerned
or social acceptance-focused family.

RIGHT MIDDLE EAR PROBLEMS

“Shut up!” They are systematically shutting out critical comments from the
environment.

LEFT MIDDLE EAR PROBLEMS

“Tuning out.” They are refusing to listen to their own inner critic.

“PLUGGED” EAR(S)

“I don’ wanna know!” There is an inhibition of the ability to develop any

breadth of understanding and comprehension -- a pronounced propensity to
reject wisdom. They are doing a systematic refusal to know or understand
of late.

There is also a frustrated inability to translate their feelings and intentions

into effective action. Their determination has found no place to go, and it

344
therefore has turned into resentment, and they are rather prone to blame.

This whole pattern arises from their having been in an “associate parent”
position in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family who would likely
explode and “blow apart at the seams” if the individual noted or expressed
any patterns, shared any understanding, or tried to make things work.

RIGHT EAR “PLUGGED”

“Reality-resentment.” They have a lot of resentment of the way things work

in the world. They have a grim determination to make things happen
THEIR way. This came about when they found if they did things in the
right way in their family, they could make some progress.

LEFT EAR “PLUGGED”

“I’ll get mine!” They have a lot of resentment about unmet needs and a
fierce determination to get their needs met, come what may. Their
experience was if they went after their needs in this way, sometimes it
would work.

RUPTURED EARDRUM

“Blown up.” They have been severely traumatized by what they have heard.
They feel that the negativity experienced is thoroughly deserved, and that
they are totally demoralized by their sense of shame and accountability, not
to mention their utter rejection by God, as they experience it. It comes from
being severely overloaded with responsibility and accountability as a child
in their severely dysfunctional, abusive and denial-dominated family.

RIGHT EARDRUM RUPTURED

“Environmental distrust.” They have the experience they can’t believe what
they have heard about how the world works.

LEFT EARDRUM RUPTURED

“Self-rejection.” They feel that they caused World War II, and they are
taking the information they have heard as validation of that. (See

345
EARLOBE PROBLEMS; EAR PROBLEMS -- EAR CANAL; EAR
PROBLEMS -- EXTERNAL STRUCTURE; EAR PROBLEMS -- INNER
EAR)

EARLOBE PROBLEMS

“Alone on my own.” They are feeling threatened by life, and that there is
insufficient support from the Universe. It arises from having had to be more
or less, alone and on their own from the beginning.

RIGHT EARLOBE

“Barely making it.” They have a feeling of having a tenuous hold on

survival.

LEFT EARLOBE

“Shut down.” They are feeling cut off from their higher self and from the
“Home Office” (“All That Is”).

EATING DISORDERS

“Turd of the earth.” They are utterly disgusted with themselves, and they
are convinced in their guts they are utterly worthless, evil and deserving of
severe rejection punishment. There is an intense emptiness inside that
reflects a desperate need for the maternal nurturance they never got.

They are strongly self-rejecting, punishment-seeking and “self-purifying” in

a desperate effort to “balance the moral budget” and to “earn the God
Housekeeping Seal of Approval.” They are a love-aholic who is deeply
depressed and desperately despairing. There is an accompanying
overwhelmed fear of life and an underlying desire to die.

They are the product of severe “smother-mothering” and “keep them around
the old homestead” massive possessiveness. This was coupled with intense
sex-ploitativeness, deprivation and denigration disguised as great affection.
(See ANOREXIA; BULIMIA)

“E-BALL VAPOR” POISONING

346
“Oppression.” They are being subjected to external domination to which
either they are either surrender in fear or they are violently resisting. They
are suffering from vulnerability to negative suggestions from others. It is
the product of their having been reared in an oppressive and invasive
family.

POISONED TO DEATH

“Snuffed out.” They were so crushed by the environment that they were
driven over the edge by it.

********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

ECLAMPSIA (Internal poisoning and possibly convulsions late in

pregnancy)

“Second thoughts.” They have an extreme ambivalence about or an out-

and-out rejection of this pregnancy. It is a profound refusal of motherhood,
arising from their own severely rejecting and abusive mothering, especially
during infancy. It may also involve a rageful rejection of this particular
individual as an additional aggravator.

E. COLI [Escherichia Coli] (Bacteria from drinking water producing

inflammation of the stomach and intestinal lining that is potentially lethal)

“Hemmed in.” They feel over-demanded of, exploited and prevented from
doing what they want to do with their life. They are afraid to refuse the
demands for fear of rejection or abandonment, so they grudgingly carry out
their imposed responsibilities.

They dearly wish they could express their true feelings and selfhood. In the
more severe cases, it involves so much self-rejection that they end up in

347
effect sacrificing themselves to it as the seemingly only way out of their
misery. It comes from having had their “love-line” contingent upon their
performing “up to snuff,” and upon their meeting their family’s needs first.

ECTOPIC PREGNANCY (Outside the uterus)

“What are YOU doing here?!” They are intensely ambivalent or rejecting of
being pregnant, in these circumstances, and/or with this child. The result is
that the fertilization happened outside the womb. This rare and dangerous
occurrence reflects either the massive intent of the soul of the child and/or
the Universe to have this pregnancy occur, despite or even because of the
mother’s intense resistance (as part of the destiny design).

ECZEMA (Itchy rashes on skin)

“You-eschewing.” They have a lot of hurt individuality which was caused

by a “Don’t be you!” injunction imprinted by an ambivalent mother who
was narcissistic, exploitative, punitive and possessive. They are attacking
themselves before the anticipated external attack comes. They have guilt for
manifesting their individuality, the feeling being that they are destroying the
family who are dependent on them by doing so.

************************************

“Molting.” They are releasing their old thought patterns, like a snake
shedding its skin. They have an “old personality” that needs to be released.
They are having difficulty doing so, and they are tending to hang on to the
past, with a resulting frustration and irritation arising from the conflicts
involved. They fear the future and they expect that things will only
deteriorate, due to the way things went in their dysfunctional family.

************************************

“Royally pissed off.” They are full of suppressed resentment, breathtaking

antagonism, and mental eruptions. They feel frustrated by external events,
and they have a feeling of powerlessness to do anything about them.

348
They feel people are not helping, and that they are not being handled
correctly. They feel interfered with, blocked and prevented from doing
something, and they are very irritated about it. Their experience is that they
can’t make themselves understood, and that they probably shouldn’t even
try, given the stakes involved. In their experienced frustrated helplessness,
they take it out on themselves instead. It is the result of having been
constantly constricted as a child or conversely of not having had enough
training in ecological cooperation.

*************************************

“Alienation-starvation.” They have a pronounced sense of isolation and

deprivation. There is an underlying stroke-starvation and excessive need for
physical contact, due to early emotional deprivation. They are super-
sensitive to any loss of love, and they have a lot of hurt feelings from the
past. They are repressing all negative emotions, due to fear of alienating
and disapproval-eliciting.

Also operative here is a strong sexual guilt that arose from “tantalizing
tarantula” sex-ploitation in the context of systematic punishment for any
affection-seeking or sexual activation.

************************************

“Persona problems.” They are experiencing deep discomfort with

themselves and the image they project. They are reacting by not wanting to
deal with the issues involved. They want to withdraw into themselves and
to just close up inside. They are hypersensitive to their environment and
about themselves. They were massively messaged that what they are is
“unfit for human consumption.” (See the body part(s) affected for more
information)

EDEMA (Body-wide water retention)

“Holding on.” They are not letting go of something or someone, and they
are resistant to changes. They are hanging on to the past for fear that if they
let go, something awful will happen. They are repressing, denying or
clutching to inner feelings and urges. They feel emotionally trapped in the

349
direction they are going in, and they feel unable to emotionally assert
themselves to bring any release. They had to grit and bear it in their rigidly
restricting dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Over-burdened.” They feel like they are carrying a heavy load on their
shoulders, an overload of responsibility. They want to share the load, but
they are afraid to ask for fear of alienating and losing what support they do
have. It’s a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern in which they were held
accountable and responsible for the needs and situations of everyone and
everything in their family, while the only support they got came from just
that “unsung hero(ine)” role in a “serve-aholic” situation.

*************************************

“Love-starved.” They are desperate for love and afraid of the loss of love. It
comes from a fear that any change will result in the loss of even more in
their life. They’d rather keep things as they are than take a chance that they
will end up with nothing, which is what they fully expect is their “just
desserts” for all the “failures” of their “care-taking,” as represented by the
negative events in their family’s history.

*************************************

“Clutching/clinging.” They have a great fear of losing something vital to

their survival and acceptability as a human being. They are intensely
abandonment-paranoid and approval-enslaved, and they are into severe self-
suppressing and pleasing-appeasing patterns as a rejection-deflection
strategy. They are also prone to highly possessive and jealous patterns in
their relationships.

It is the result of being placed on very conditional acceptance from very

early on. They had to earn their “love-line,” which of course “meant” that
“God said” that they don’t deserve love, -- they “earn” it by “selling out,”
and then hating themselves for it.

ELBOW PROBLEMS

350
“No way, Jose!” They are resisting changes in the direction of their life, and
they are holding off new experiences. They find themselves unable to shift
their focus or to change their perspective. They feel their values are being
violated, and they are refusing to manipulated or forced into unexplored
territory, as they experience it. They come from a highly conservative
patriarchal family.

*************************************

“Turf-protecting.” They have the feeling that they are being used, and that
other people are “elbowing in” on their turf. They are self-opinionated and
they have an inflated sense of their own self-importance, both of which
reflect an underlying insecurity about their role or position in life. They
have a difficult time moving through the environment because they are
unwilling to recognize other people’s situations and needs. It comes from
having had to fend their way in a self-immersed and highly manipulative
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Studied incompetence.” They are afraid of the demands of life, and they
are highly uncertain of their coping capabilities. They therefore
systematically sabotage and undermine success, achievement, and anything
that might lead to their increasing their responsibility, to stretching their
repertoire or to their developing self-confidence. They are the product of a
“keep ‘em around the old homestead” enmeshed family.

RIGHT ELBOW

“Juggling act.” They have difficulties in coordinating their means of

manifesting their priorities and resources.

LEFT ELBOW

“Ethical issues.” They are encountering dilemmas regarding the integration

of their values with their desires.

INSIDE OF ELBOW PROBLEMS

351
“Moral issues.” They are bothered by conflicts about their motivations
intentions. They feel at a deep (though perhaps not conscious) level that
there is something inherently wrong or bad about their desires. It comes
from a severely shaming family environment.

RIGHT INSIDE OF ELBOW

“What’s the right way?” There are issues about their manner of
manifestation of their desires.

LEFT INSIDE OF ELBOW

“Motivational value issues.” They have concerns about what they desire --
about their ethicality, integrity or morality.

“TENNIS ELBOW” (Pain in the arm on twisting inward)

“Over-responsible.” They have the distinct feeling that they are in effect
Atlas carrying the world on their shoulders, and if Atlas shrugs, all hell
breaks loose. They were the “sane one” in a denial-dominated, severely
dysfunctional, self-defeating family. As a result, they experienced the
“Cinderella/Cinderfella” syndrome of their family relying extremely on
them while simultaneously believing that all negativity comes from them
because they carry the responsibility accountability for everything.

They end up overwhelmed, in over their head, feeling responsible for World
War II, and afraid of setting off World War III. They have a highly
exaggerated sense of responsibility for the welfare of everyone and
everything, and they are intensely competence-anxious and run amok-
anxious as a result. They are being told that they need to start studying what
is going on in their life, so that they can determine where their
responsibilities end and those of the world start up.

***********************************

“Perform-aholic.” With a pronounced tendency to focus on obligations and

assigned duties, they have a heavily moralistic and firm determination to fill
responsibilities, to maintain moral strength and to keep up their tenacity.

352
They have great difficulty giving and receiving, and they have poor
communication and interpersonal interactions. There is a deep-seated
resentment of others’ lack of competence and commitment, and they feel
they are the only one who knows how to do it right. They are a
perfectionistic self-driver and self-competitor, with a merciless demand for
continued improvement of performance. It arises from having been the
“competent one” in the family, with the resulting high expectations,
perfectionistic standards, and threat of abandonment if they didn’t perform
“up to snuff.”

RIGHT “TENNIS ELBOW”

“Ecological issues.” They are having conflicts about how they go about
meeting their responsibilities.

LEFT “TENNIS ELBOW”

“Justice issues.” They have concerns about the morality and ethicality of
their perfectionistic expectations.

ELECTRIC SHOCK

“Spiritual jolt.” They are being reminded of their relationship to the

Cosmos and of their tendency to neglect it. It got started in a significantly
materialistic and/or dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Suppressed self-destructiveness.” They are prone to engage in self-

endangering and potentially deadly patterns. They were systematically
denigrated, deprived and degraded in their dysfunctional family as a child.
They are now being told they had better look into healing this pattern before
it gets them.

ELECTROCUTION

“Spiritual fire.” They were obsessed with a spiritual issue that ultimately
consumed them. They either felt that the world was too “out of integrity” to

353
stay in and/or that they were so intensely cosmically incongruent that they
had to leave. It is a pattern that got started with a highly accusatory family
history.

*********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

ELEPHANTIASIS (Severe swelling of extremities and genitals, with skin-

thickening)

“Shut down.” They desperately need to re-center on the essentials of life,

namely the need for love and joy in their life. They are handicapped by an
inability to release past memories and other wastes, such as harmful habits
and traits, or to defend themselves against negative thoughts. They are
enormously defended against external or internal attacking agents, and they
have an insulated/isolated attitude.

They are therefore “running on empty,” and they have become inadequate
to the cause, with the result that they have no felt need or motivation in a
lazy, being-tired-of-it-all reaction to some one or some situation or some set
of circumstances.

Their emotional body is in severe disrepair, and they are having real
difficulties in how well they are taking care of their own needs, getting
nurtured, and handling their negative feelings about themselves. They are
the product of an attacking and intensely shame-inducing dysfunctional
family who conveyed very clearly to them that they have no right to love
and joy, and that “There’s no joy in Bloodville.” (See the part(s) of the body
affected for more information)

ELIMINATION PROBLEMS

354
“No way, Jose!” They are refusing to let go of the past, and of their
interpretations and reactions to their experiences. They have a lot of
unconscious resentment that leads them to ruminate and to nurture
vengeance ideation. They have a lot of accumulated tension and agitation as
a result of all this. They come from a grudge-nursing and injustice-
hounding dysfunctional family.

EMBOLISM (Floating blood clot in their circulation system)

“Overwhelmed and immobilized.” It is a feeling of being asked to do far

too much. They feel inadequate to the cause and/or that the world has no
right to demand so much of them. It comes from having been the “family
hoist” for a dysfunctional family all through their childhood.

EMPHYSEMA (Degeneration of the lungs)

“No right to exist.” They feel unworthy of living, and they have the belief
that they are somehow violating the Cosmic order by being here. When they
are vulnerable or under stress, the distinct impression is that the world is
decidedly not a safe place. They fear taking in life, for fear that “God will
strike them dead.”

It is the result of intense intrauterine and subsequent rejection and trauma.

Their mother did not want them, and they got that message loud and clear
from what they thought was the “Home Office.” The result is existential
guilt, resulting in self-deprivation based on severe self-rejection.

RIGHT LUNG EMPHYSEMA

“Ecological concerns.” They have great guilt about their actions and their
environmental impacts.

LEFT LUNG EMPHYSEMA

“Shame-frame.” There is profound guilt and self-disgust about who they are
-- their inner values, motivations and intentions.

ENCEPHALITIS (Inflammation of the brain)

355
“God is Al Capone!” They are enraged at the Universe for the “dirty end of
the stick” they have gotten since the beginning. They have always felt like a
misfit, that they somehow don’t belong here. As a result, their needs have
not been met, and they in turn have been unable to fit in, with the outcome
that they have gotten a lot of “You don’t belong here!” messages from the
environment. They feel totally betrayed by the “Home Office.” It all got
started in their dysfunctional and exploitative yet wrong-making family.

ENDOCRINE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“Careening cannon.” Their life is massively out of balance and out of

control. Their functioning is disrupted, disoriented and discombobulating to
them and to the surrounding ecology. They are the product of a subtly or
overtly chaotic dysfunctional family.

ENDOMETRIOSIS; ENDOMETRITIS (Inflammation of the womb lining)

“She-jection.” She is involved in alienation from her femininity and her

personal power in reaction to a patriarchal family’s denigration and
devaluation. She is insecure and deeply disappointed in herself, with a
notable inability to manifest self-love. There is also a great deal of sorrow
and grief going on that is not being handled, dealt with or acknowledged.

However, underneath all this is a great amount of frustration and a raging

resentment over being dealt with in the manner she has been, and there is a
great deal of frustration and blame-throwing that she tries to keep to herself.
The trouble is-she ends up turning it on herself. It is the result of both the
patriarchal society and a highly chauvinistic household.

*************************************

“Blame-throwing.” She is being royally screwed over, as far as they are

concerned. She feels that she is being discriminated against, exploited and
abused. She is the product of an accusatory and accountability-avoidant
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

356
“Non-self-loving.” They feel that she doesn’t deserve love, and that she has
to make do all by herself. She therefore goes for all kings of love-
substitutes like sex and sugar. She was more or less left to her own devices
from the very beginning in a neglect and perhaps rejection pattern.

ENERGY DEPLETION

“There must be some way out of here.” They are in effect worn down by
life, and they don’t want to bother with the constant effort involved in
coping. They strongly want to “take their marbles and go home.” There is a
good deal of depression, despair and demoralization going on here. They
are the product of a completely devastatingly dysfunctional family.

ENTERITIS (Inflammation of the intestinal tract)

“Going up in flames.” They are intensely enraged at the world and at their
life. Nothing seems to be working right, and they are infuriated about it.
Everything is irritating and frustrating them, due to their having absorbed a
nihilistic and embittered attitude from their family. Their attitude is
poisoning them, yet they hold on to it because it seems the only realistic
response to reality. It got started in a dysfunctional family where nothing
DID go right.

SMALL INTESTINE ENTERITIS

“Where am I?” They can’t tell which end is up, due to the distortions of
their discrimination generated by their dysfunctional family.

LARGE INTESTINE ENTERITIS

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They are deeply suspicious and across-the-board

skeptical and critical about everything, due to having come up in a highly
dysfunctional, distrusting and untrustworthy family.

ENVIRONMENTAL ALLERGY (Allergic to just about everything)

“Total control.” They are completely blown out by their mania for total
hands-on determination of everything. They simply have to take charge of

357
the critical parameters of every situation. Their feeling is that if they don’t,
all hell will break loose. They were the “sane one” in a dysfunctional family
who placed them in a parental role from very early on.

*************************************

“Pissed off.” They have an intense irritation reaction to life, and they react
to people instead of interacting with them. They are utterly enraged and
frustrated at their situation and at the world for making them this way. They
were programmed to be self-defeating and alienating by their injustice-
nurturing dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Suppressed feelings.” They are dominated by anxiety, repressed emotions,

and unexpressed rage from their childhood. They are sitting on severe
emotional difficulties, and they are massively denying of their own power
and self-worth. They feel that bottom line they don’t deserve and can’t
expect any love or validation in their life. They were severely rejected by
their self-immersed dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Arrested mourning.” They have a great deal of unexpressed grief and

despair over felt rejection by their parents, their mother in particular.
Although their family was intensely involved with the individual, they were
effectively doing it all on their own terms, not in response to the
individual’s characteristics and needs. So the individual is now longing for
mother’s love or for that of a mother standin.

*************************************

“Their majesty.” They have the feeling that they are very special and
requiring of super “special” treatment. They were intensely “smother-
loved” and sex-ploitatively “spoiled” by severely dysfunctional parents who
were addicted to them.

358
This placed them in a position of power for which they were totally
unprepared, with the resulting sense of responsibility for all that happens on
the one hand, along with the pronounced tendency to abuse the power as a
child, on the other. This effectively arrested their development to the point
where they are now incapable of coping, and they feel completely
frustrated.

EPILEPSY

“Fear-freak-out.” They have a sense of persecution and pressure from the

environment, along with a feeling of great struggle. They are being
overloaded in what they can handle, and they want to opt out. However, a
considerable amount of this overload is due to their exaggerating events in
their mind. They are displaying a rejecting of life and certain violence
towards themselves. They are also very agitated about what they regard as
the “ship of fools” surrounding them, and they tend to become arrogant and
think they know more than anyone else. They have a good deal of rage
about all they encounter.

There is also a hidden fear amounting to severe “run amok-anxiety” and

agitated anticipation of a potential homicidal rampage from themselves.
There is an extreme need to escape from the experiences of life, along with
a great fear of the expectations of society. They have tremendous
competence-anxiety and profound cope-ability-anxiety. There is a
pronounced sense of being out-classed and overwhelmed by the world,
along with a tremendous resentment of their situation. The convulsions are
fear paroxysms and intense resentment-energy releases.

It came from having too much expected of them, either for what they were
capable of or for a child. There was much performance-conditional love and
a resulting rejection. In the more intense cases, the mother operated as a
“psychic vampire” who sucked their juices all the time. If the epilepsy
appeared in childhood, it added to the sense of their being incapable and
“broken brained,” which only fueled the flames of the situation.

*************************************

359
“Self-punishing.” They have an inordinate need to flagellate, castigate, and
castrate themselves. They therefore consistently engage in various forms of
violence against themselves. They want to get the hell out of here, or at
least to withdraw from the fray so they don’t have to be required of any
more. They come from a severely undermining, negating and punitive
family who convinced them that they “caused World War II.” (See
SEIZURES)

EPSTEIN-BARR VIRUS (Continuous exhaustion)

“Crushed talent.” They are experiencing unfulfilled giftedness-suppression,

resulting in severe despair-rage, along with emotional commotional
episodes of almost psychotic-seeming proportions, and utter exhaustion
comparable to Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

They also find themselves being “used” by their gifts, in the form of
uncontrollable outbursts and breakouts of their talents in a non-functional
and often highly detrimental manner. They go into experiences and
expressions of intense mental and emotional distress and distortion that are
extremely alarming and alienating.

They feel possessed by these explosions, and they become quite “run amok-
anxious” about it. In addition, they often are possessed by their family,
institutions, groups, “friends,” and/or by spouse figures.

They are the product of extremely possessive and oppressive parenting that
got started intrauterine. They were forbidden and prevented from doing
their own thing or from developing their own capabilities, identity and
destiny. They were instead forced into playing out their parent(s) (usually
the father’s) unexpressed destiny.

*************************************

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread-
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.
They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-
exhaustion.

360
They have lost their sense of purposes and direction, of the desire for life,
and the wind has gone out of their sails. They have developed a deep fear of
life, of taking responsibility, and of coping with any further demands. The
illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat from confrontation and
action. They are the product of perfectionistic parenting.

*************************************

“Moral monster.” There is a programmed self-rejection that has resulted in

a “belly up” of the immune system. It in effect works against them, as if
they were allergic to themselves and the world. They were placed in the
“family hoist” position of over-responsibility, and they were targeted with
the attributed accountability for everything that went wrong in the family --
as if it was a motivated let down betrayal or a personal failure on their part.
This came about as a function of their being a gifted child living in a
dysfunctional family who expected them to be able to handle all the
family’s problems. They played the “hero(ine)” role in the family, and they
turned into a work-aholic -- achieve-aholic contribution-freak.

They became very accomplished and independent, with perfectionistic

standards around worth-earning arising from unpleasable parenting -- they
could never, ever measure up. They ended up validation-starved as a result.

*************************************

“Desperate vindication-seeking.” They have a huge control trip that doesn’t

work that arises because they have no sense of their personal worth or
value. They operated in a chronic flight-fight system arousal in childhood,
in a context of continual rejection, blame-throwing, and impossible
demands.

There is a severe “family betrayal” delusion and a guilt-grabbing

propensity, due to their being told in effect that they caused World War II. It
is a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” syndrome where, due to their gifts, they
actually tried to “go for the gold ring” of healing their family. In the
meantime, the family was severely exploitative and betraying, as they
overwhelmingly expected of and over-utilized them.

361
No one taught them self-care or self-soothing in their first year of life. They
were expected to care for the parents instead. They therefore have no sense
of entitlement. There was little nurturance, compassion or protection in
infancy, which resulted in very heavy self-numbing and frantic-fanatic
efforting to “make up for what they have caused.” They were, in effect,
abandoned at an early age by expectations of perfection and miracles.

They are now collapsing, out of a sense of non-deservingness and from

having run out of inner resources to pull of the “rabbit in the hat” trick any
more.

*************************************

“At effect.” They are into a hapless-helpless-hopeless victimization

experience. There is an inability to self-nurture, self-appreciate and self-
soothe. As a result of all this, they can sometimes end up being care-
coercing of the environment, in a very belated attempt to get the
fundamental nurturing they never received.

The family was highly authoritarian, non-supportive and repressive-

suppressive from the beginning. Often there was also physical and sexual
abuse, along with the intense emotional abuse and deprivation. They were
subjected to highly conditional, demanding and self-immersed parenting,
and “there was no joy in Bloodville.” The whole pattern could be
summarized in the phrase, “It’s not allowed!”

ESOPHAGUS PROBLEMS

“Self-protective self-starvation.” They are having real difficulties with their

food intake control system. They are deeply conflicted about whether and
what to take in, in the way of nutrients. They are having a severe “love is a
poison apple” deep distrust reaction to all that the Universe provides them.
Yet at the same time, they need to eat, and they are in constant conflict
about this issue.

It got started when they encountered rage/hate-contaminated nourishment

and nurturance in the beginning of their life as a function of severe
ambivalence or rejection by their mother.

362
ESTROGEN PROBLEMS (Female hormone, particularly in regard to the
sexual system)

“Femininity issues.” They are conflicted or having difficulties in the

manifestation of their female nature. They are either rejecting the feminine
or they are feeling unfeminine or unable to manifest the feminine. They are
the product of a patriarchal feminine-rejecting family.

LOW ESTROGEN

“Yang-banging.” They have a rather pronounced propensity to suppress the

feminine and/or to over-manifest the masculine in their approach and
orientation. They come from a feminine-denigrating and power-abusing
patriarchal and perhaps authoritarian family.

HIGH ESTROGEN

“Over-receptive.” They tend to be too easily influenced, persuaded or

intimidated into accommodating to what is being desired, suggested or
imposed in their functioning. They may also be excessively sexually active
or accommodating. Their family was rather exploitative and sexualizingly
dysfunctional.

EUSTACHIAN TUBE PROBLEMS

“Belongingness issues.” They have deep concerns about their right to be

here, taking up resources and space, and about fitting in, finding a niche and
being relevant. It is the result of being more or less left to their own devices
from infancy onward, emotionally and perhaps even physically.

EXCESSIVE LACTATION (Too much milk production)

“Eternal maternal.” Their self-worth and identity are totally tied up in being
there for the world. They were pressed heavily into service as a child as
everyone’s maternal support system, and they now feel ill-at-ease when
their ministrations are not required or received well.

EXCESSIVE SALIVATION

363
“Pain-drain.” They are suffering from love-and nurturance-starvation due to
maternal deprivation. Ironically, it often occurs in the context of an over-
protective and/or confidence-undermining parenting pattern. The point is-
there was severe emotional non-support and effectiveness-prevention.

*************************************

“Frustrated reformer.” They are having great difficulty assimilating the

large amount of anger-generating experiences in their life. They want to
change things, and they are not being able to. It is the result of having been
the “sane one” in a severely dysfunctional family.

EXCESS SPINAL FLUID

“Island unto themselves.” They are the product of a significantly

dysfunctional family who did not respond to their needs, or in which they
were forced to take over the meeting of their own needs and those of the
family because no one else would.

As a result, they developed an abiding distrust of the Universe. They are

feeling drained and over-demanded, like they have been abandoned by the
“Home Office.” They feel that there are serious conflicts between their
personal goals and the Divine intent, and they are very worried and anxious
as a result.

This developed as a result of a family history in which a lot didn’t make

sense, and yet it was justified as being “God’s Will” or the equivalent. It is a
“God is Al Capone” relational issue with the “Source.”

************************************

“Trapped in their pattern.” They are proving to be unable to re-program

their “computer of the mind,” with a resulting pessimistic depression and
nihilistic worry. As a result, there is now a major difficulty with the
chemical communication system in their “bio-computer.”

Either the belief systems or the “Executive Officer” or both are locked in
rigid retaining of the past pattern. There is a profound inner conflict within

364
the operational ego and/or between the desires and intentions of the
personality and their perception of their unfolding destiny.

They are unable to revise their views of things. It is the result of highly
rigid rearing in childhood in a rather patriarchal and authoritarian
household.

EXCESS MUCOUS

“Drowning in their grief.” They are laboring under a continuous deluge of

disappointment, depression and/or despair. Their feeling is that life is never
going to get any better and that they are being chronically deprived. They
are the product of depriving circumstances ranging from poverty to out-
and-out rejection or abandonment at an early age.

(See LARYNX PROBLEMS, SINUS PROBLEMS and/or THROAT

PROBLEMS)

EXHAUSTION

“Walking zombie.” It reflects that a great deal of “back burner processing”

of a healing and/or re-organizational nature is going on. In this situation, the
pattern is one of being able to rise to the demands of situations as they arise,
but then there is a “collapse into a limp noodle” like a puppet with its
strings cut, when the situation no longer requires their resources. In such a
situation, it could be characterized as being “emotional exhaustion.”

***********************************

“Wiped out.” They are experiencing depleted resources arising from having
committed all available reserves to the situation. If this is a chronic pattern,
it represents frantic avoidance of dealing with what ails them, due to a
denial-based dysfunctional family history.

OR It is indicative of a “serve-aholic” lifestyle arising from feelings of

having to “make up for” something “missing” or “wrong” with them, an
impression that came from a shame-inducing family.

365
In any case, they need to work on being able to receive help, and on being
able to engage in co-creative endeavors. (See FATIGUE)

“EXPLOSION” (Literally their head or their whole body “exploding” --

blowing apart)

“Outta here!” They wanted instantaneous exit, with no delays, frills, pain or
risks. It got to be intolerable to continue. When it is done as a matter of
intolerability, it reflects the effects of the powerful intrauterine and
subsequent message that they have no business being here in the first place.

EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA

“Blow-out.” They are frantically sorting and shuffling ideas. They are
encountering a situation that requires that they process out the implications
and ramifications of what is going down.

They fear that they will not be able to have what it takes to handle the needs
of the new developments. Their feeling is, “I’m all I’ve got,” and that if
they fail, all hell will break loose.

There was never any trustworthy support when they were growing up, and
they learned to take care of themselves in a “self-made person” manner
with a “disaster-deflecting” psychology.

*************************************

“Scared shitless.” They are being overwhelmed by the requirement and/or

process of having either to let go of the past or to take on something
radically new and different. Something extremely important is pending and
about to happen, and they are totally terrified of its implications and
ramifications. They want to rush through it with their nose plugged, so to
speak, so as to not experience it or to not experience the transition process
to it.

The situation at hand is one in which they are being forced out of their old
lifestyle, and they are completely blown away by the prospect of life

366
without it. They come from a chronically anxious and catastrophe-
expecting “hunkering down in the bunker” family culture.

*************************************

“Papa/Mama knows best!” They tend to push things onto other people in a
bossy “unilateral good deeds” fashion. They can’t seem to “leave well
enough alone.” They have an abiding fear of the Universe, and they feel
that in effect they have to have “hands on” control of everything at all
times. They are simply terrified of letting go.

There was never anyone at the helm of the ship in their dysfunctional
family, and so they grabbed the wheel and they never let go. Now they
don’t dare let go. Their current circumstances are precipitating and “loss of
control” panic reaction.

*************************************

“Clinging to the mast.” There is an underlying passivity and a desire not to

be bothered, and yet they are simply terrified of having to engage the world.
They have an abiding fear of the Universe, and it feels like a matter of life
and death to them that they keep their restricted little world.

They grew up totally alone in a totally untrustworthy but seemingly

unimpeachable environment, but their deeper experience was that things are
never what they appear to be. Their family systematically turned on them
and they considered the individual to be the cause of all of their problems.

EYE PROBLEMS

“Unable to see the truth.” They are having difficulty in seeing clearly the
nature of reality. They are wearing distorting filters and lenses that make it
hard to see the world. They have self-protective screens so the world can’t
see their soul or who they are and what they see.

In short, they are lacking insight into the realities of things, and they don’t
see the truth. They also fail to see their own personal worth, nature and

367
potency. It stems from their not liking at all what they see in their life, and
from their fear of the future.

It is denial-domination -- systematically avoiding seeing something they

need to see and that they need to take action on in regards to their life --
they don't want to comprehend what they are witnessing. All of which,
stems from a highly dysfunctional family that literally forced them to adopt
the strategy of not seeing clearly in order to survive.

*************************************

“I” problem. It is hard for them to see themselves clearly, and that leads to
both inflation and arrogance, or to deflation and self-denigration. They are
apt to demonstrate blind prejudices, self-aggrandizement and insensitive
egocentricity, or to be constantly facing situations of infidelity, betrayal,
exploitation, losses, deceptions, devastations and degradation.

They are also apt to be prone to self-belittling, to being hyper-humble, and

to find themselves in demeaning situations, with a striking lack of self-
protection. The net effect is that they lose sight of where they are going in
their life. They also don’t see things in the same manner as others, which
often results in conflicts.

They have little or no insight or understanding, and they have to operate

under a cloud of confusion -- the “magical mystery tour” pattern, as in “I
just don’t see why…” There results a bondage to fixed ideas and a
reluctance to see the true nature of things.

One outcome of this is that they are prone to be non-comprehending and

non-forgiving of others. They are fearful, agitatedly nervous and awareness-
avoiding, which leads to limited vision, self-masking and “mental
squinting” -- with all the attendant events. They are the product of an
incomprehensible and reality-distorting severely dysfunctional family.

RIGHT EYE PROBLEMS

“Things are awful!” They have deep conflicts about what they see going on
in the world around them.

368
LEFT EYE PROBLEMS

“Oh my Gawd!” They are involved in intense emotional reactions to what

they see happening to and within themselves.

“BLOODSHOT” EYES

“Overload.” They are under a lot of pressure. They are over-worked,

exhausted, handling high stakes requirements, processing very deep issues,
facing a heavy situation, or any combination of such circumstances. They
are apt to become careless and accident-prone under these conditions. It is a
re-run of an old, familiar pattern, as they were the “sane one” in their
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Grief-relief.” They are processing deep grief that is being set off by current
circumstances. It is a clearing out of some of the early devastation
generated by neglect, ejection and/or rejection in childhood.

RIGHT EYE “BLOODSHOT”

“How’m I doin’?” They are having issues with how they are handling
things. This often arises from a history of wrong-making from their family.

LEFT EYE “BLOODSHOT”

“Internal schisms.” They are wrestling with conflicts about their inner
feelings, commitments and motivations. They were often made to feel
shame or guilt for their experiences and intentions.

“BURNING” EYES (Due to internal toxin release)

“Emotional exhaustion.” It is arising from processing very early

foundational ego damage. The individual is now clearing out the earliest
self-relationship-distorting experiences, and they are changing their entire
operational system as a result. This depletes almost all available energy.

***************************************

369
“Over the top.” They are having a “straw that broke the camel’s back”
resentment reaction. They are a “serve-aholic” co-dependent who is going
over the top in intolerance for any further exploitation, deprivation and
humiliation. It got started in a severely dysfunctional family in which they
learned that the only way they could meet their needs was to serve to
survive.

***************************************

“Depths of depression.” The present situation is activating their underlying

anaclitic depression (due to emotional abandonment in infancy). They are
dealing with severe deprivation-grief and rejection-pain. It arises from
being functionally neglected as an infant.

RIGHT EYE “BURNING”

“Oh my Gawd!” They are encountering despair, depression and/or

resentment over what they see going on in the world around them and its
implications.

LEFT EYE “BURNING”

“Where is this taking me!?” They are undergoing despair, depression and/or
resentment about what has happened to them, what is happening to them
and/or the impacts and implications of either.

“DRY EYE” (Disruption of the tearing process in their eyes)

“Denied broken heart.” They are out of touch with their feelings. Indeed,
they have in effect turned their emotions off in reaction to all the hurts they
have experienced. They avoid and are in effect unable to contact or express
their considerable grief. They systematically misperceive their early life, so
as to not activate their great sorrow and pain. They are the product of a
depriving and demoralizingly dysfunctional family.

**********************************

370
“Hate-spate.” They are engaged in a highly spiteful refusal to see with love.
They would rather do anything than to forgive or forget anything, and they
have very angry eyes. They are incapable of compassion or comprehension,
and they are full of rage and judgmentalness. They are the product of a
hostile and self-serving family in which they were treated as the “intimate
enemy.”

RIGHT “DRY EYE”

“Baleful glare.” They have a hateful orientation towards the world around
them.

LEFT “DRY EYE”

“You’re gonna pay for this!” They are having a rageful reaction to what is
happening to them.

“EYE FATIGUE”

“Constraint-fighting.” They are operating out of resentful rebellion and

refusal to restrict themselves to an over-narrow point of view or range of
reaction and manifestation. It is often a response to an oppressive situation
and system, in their present external situation and/or within themselves and
in their lifestyle and life history. It is a “This is an up with which I will no
longer put!” reaction.

The pattern got started in their overly demanding and restrictive family
system. They did not have the right to self-determination and self-
expression to a significant degree, and this was placed in the context of
moral imperative, intense responsibilities, perfectionistic expectations
and/or intensely intrusive/invasive parenting.

EYE PROBLEMS IN CHILDREN

“I don’ wanna know!” They are harm-alarmed about what is happening in

their family. They are afraid of the implications and ramifications, and they
are tending to use their imagination to conjure up the worst case scenario.
They do not want to see what is going on in the family and in their life,

371
because it’s too overwhelming for them. It occurs when there are chronic or
situational stresses happening in their family.

“EYE STRAIN” (Fatigue generated by restricted range or amount of

fixation and/or movement)

“Constraint-fighting.” They are engaged in resentful rebellion and refusal to

restrict themselves an over-narrow point of view or range or reaction and
manifestation. It is often a response to an oppressive situation and system
either in their present external circumstances and/or within themselves and
their lifestyle and life history. It is a “This is an up with which I will no
longer put!” reaction.

The pattern got started in their overly demanding and restrictive family
system. They did not have the right to self-determination and self-
expression to a significant degree, and this was placed in the context of
moral imperative, intense responsibilities, perfectionistic expectations
and/or intensely intrusive/invasive parenting.

********************************

“It’s being done to me!” They are trying too hard to find answers outside
themselves, rather than looking inwards for resolution. They are avoiding
their inner core, and they are seeking to locate their resources externally. It
is a self-avoidant pattern that got started in their rejecting and denial-
dominated dysfunctional family.

EYE “TWITCHES”

“Attack anticipation.” It represents a fear of the return of the kind of

emotional and/or physical assaults they experienced as a child in their
authoritarian and/or dysfunctional household.

RIGHT EYE “TWITCHES”

“Duck!” They are helplessly anticipating the return of the environmental

assaults they had as a child.

372
LEFT EYE “TWITCHES”

“Mea culpa.” They are re-experiencing the internalized emotional attacks

they developed in childhood.

INFLAMMATION OF THE EYEBALL

“Right and righteous.” They are engaged in an outraged indignation stance

of anger and frustration with the “moral cretins” around them. They do not
want to see what is happening around them.

Underneath all this approach is a deeply disturbing questioning of their self-

worth. They are the product of wrong-making and judgmental parenting.

RIGHT EYEBALL INFLAMMATION

“Outraged.” They have a lot of rage at the state of the world.

LEFT EYEBALL INFLAMMATION

“Grudge-grinding.” They are outraged at how the world is treating them.

ITCHING EYES

“Ostrich response.” They are engaged in awareness-avoidance and denial-

domination, as they become threatened by the prospect of fully seeing their
life history, current situation and intended destiny on their way to
enlightenment. There is a lot of fear, grief and guilt coming up as an
impending breakout from self-limitations looms on the horizon.

They were never supposed to get this far, and there is a feeling of family-
betrayal, self-endangerment, and oceanic grief as they progress along.

******************************

“Outta my sight!” There is a deep sense of irritation by what they see, and
they want to rub it out of sight. They find what they are encountering utterly
intolerable, and they react to their indignation by trying not to see the full
implications and ramifications of what is happening. They are the product

373
of a demoralizingly dysfunctional family where looking the other way was
the only way to survive the tumult and torture of their experiences.

RIGHT EYE ITCHING

“I don’ wanna know.” They have a big fear of seeing too much about the
world around them.

LEFT EYE ITCHING

“Let’s pretend.” They are avoiding knowing their personal characteristics

and their situation.

MACULA PROBLEMS (The yellow spot on the retina which is the optic
nerve exit)

“Retinal retaliation.” They are experiencing punishment for insisting upon

seeing clearly despite severe “Don’t see!” injunctions from their intensely
dysfunctional and denial-dominated family.

They have crossed a “taboo line” into forbidden territory of clarity of

comprehension and perception in areas they were supposed to never see and
an “implanted booby trap” has gone off.

RIGHT EYE MACULA

“That’s enough out of you!” They saw too much of the realities of the world
in contradiction of their family’s worldview.

LEFT EYE MACULA

“Future-fear.” They found out the truth about who they are, and about what
their role and destiny is, and it is greatly alarming them.

“PINK EYE” (Inflammation of the eye ball)

“Right and righteous.” They are engaged in an outraged indignation stance

of anger and frustration with the “moral cretins” around them. They do not
want to see what is happening around them.

374
Underneath all this approach is a deeply disturbing questioning of their self-
worth. They are the product of wrong-making and judgmental parenting.

RIGHT “PINK EYE”

“Outraged.” They have a lot of rage at the state of the world.

LEFT “PINK EYE”

“Fed up.” They are enraged at how they are being treated by the world.

PRESSURE BEHIND THE EYEBALLS THAT THREATENS THEIR

EYE-SIGHT

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are having a problem with exacerbating

pressures from long-standing hurts. They are having a difficult time being
tender, loving and trusting of themselves and others as a result of a harsh
and judgmental patriarchal family. They are therefore losing sight of the
Truth of things and of the Divine design.

RIGHT EYE PRESSURE

“Hard-hearted.” They have developed a rather cold and uncaring approach

to the world.

LEFT EYE PRESSURE

“Self-blaming.” There is an underlying relentless unforgivingness towards

themselves.

READING VISION PROBLEMS WITH ADVANCING AGE (Presbyopia-

- increasing difficulty seeing things close up)

“Implication-anxiety.” Because of the increasing sophistication and world-

wisdom associated with being older, the ramifications and indications of
whatever is examined in detail range far and wide, often in threatening
implications. The result is a “too much to handle” reaction.

375
In addition, a “mental squinting” process develops in which “I don’ wanna
know!” becomes their motto. They seek to avoid knowing too much in
detail about anything as a self-reassurance strategy. They have a severe fear
of losing control and a pronounced propensity to avoid trauma, such as
becoming aware of an incestual history.

The tendency for this defense to show up was programmed in their denial-
dominated dysfunctional family when they were growing up.

RED-RIMMED EYES

“Overload.” They are under a lot of pressure. They are over-worked,

exhausted, handling high stakes requirements, processing very deep issues,
facing a heavy situation, or any combination of such circumstances.

They are apt to become careless and accident-prone under these conditions.
It is a re-run of an old, familiar pattern, as they were the “sane one” in their
dysfunctional family.

*********************************

“Grief-relief.” They are processing deep grief that is being set off by current
circumstances. It is a clearing out of some of the early devastation
generated by neglect, ejection and/or rejection in childhood.

*********************************

“Victimization-resentment.” They feel inexorably done to by their

environment, and there is a great deal of rage about that. There is a strong
element of resignation-despair involved here, the feeling that nothing is
going to get any better, and that there is nothing to do to make it any
different. It was an exploitative, accusatory and disempowering household.

RETINA PROBLEMS

“Retinal retaliation.” They are experiencing physical problems for insisting

on seeing clearly despite severe “Don’t see!” injunctions from their
intensely dysfunctional and denial-dominated family. They have crossed a

376
“taboo line” into forbidden territory of clarity of comprehension and
perception in areas they were supposed to never see and an “implanted
booby trap” has gone off. (See CATARACTS; CORNEA PROBLEMS;
GLAUCOMA; “JERKING” MOVEMENTS OF THE EYES-
NYSTAGMUS)

RIGHT EYE RETINA

“Don’t see!” They saw too much of the realities of the world that is in
contradiction of their family's worldview.

LEFT EYE RETINA

“Aha!” They found out the truth about who they are and what their role and
destiny is. (See DETACHED RETINA; INFLAMMATION OF THE
RETINA)

EYEBROW PROBLEMS

“Position-threat resentment.” They have a lot of anger about real, imagined

or feared blockages to their ambitions and the threat of loss of their social
standing, reputation, acceptance and support.

They are fighting failure programming from early childhood, when the
family recognized their power and potential for success, to which they
reacted with sabotaging the individual’s operational and motivational
system so as to be able to control them. The effective intent was to “keep
‘em around the old homestead” to take care of the parents.

RIGHT EYEBROW

“How do I do it?” They have issues about how to manifest their ambitions
and intentions, and around how they go about getting social standing, etc.

LEFT EYEBROW

“Should I do it?” They are having conflicts about their intentions to succeed
and to achieve social acceptance and standing.

377
EYELASH PROBLEMS

“Expression-suppression.” There are issues in the area of emotional

expression, usually in the form of suppression, repression and oppression. It
is reflective of their not having been allowed to express their “natural child”
and their true reactions to things.

RIGHT EYELASH

“Self-suppressing.” They have a fear of expressing of their feelings and

reactions to what is happening in the world around them.

LEFT EYELASH

“Self-distrust.” There is inhibition of and conflict around the experience and

expression of their feelings about themselves and what is happening within
and to them.

LOSS, DAMAGE OR CURTAILMENT OF EYELASHES

“Don’t you dare let the cat out of the bag!” They were intensely inhibited
and prohibited as a child. Now they have gone and done it -- they have
released themselves beyond that line -- and they are “paying their
programmed consequences.”

EYELID PROBLEMS

“At risk.” They are feeling unprotected, insecure and perhaps even
threatened in the world. They are uncertain of what is coming for them and
it is generating some anxiety. It is the result of effectively neglectful and
perhaps exploitative or unpredictably dangerous parenting. It was probably
a chaotic or convenience-concerned family culture.

UPPER EYELID PROBLEMS

“Oh God, what’s coming?” They feel financially, materially and/or socially
insecure, as though they face some threat from this sphere.

RIGHT UPPER EYELID

378
“What are they going to do?” They are feeling threatened by the
environment, a sense of impending attack or trouble.

LEFT UPPER LID

“Can I do it?” They are insecure about their ability to provide for
themselves and to protect themselves.

LOWER LID PROBLEMS

“They’re gonna get me!” They are emotionally insecure and anticipating
betrayal, attack or harm from the social environment or the occurrence of
events that have deep negative emotional meanings for them. They are the
product of an untrustworthy and unpredictable dysfunctional family.

RIGHT LOWER LID

“Dodge ball.” They are anxious about the possibility of hurtful events
coming from the environment.

LEFT LOWER LID

“Self-distrust.” They are having the experience of “I have met the enemy --
and it is me!” regarding their emotional welfare.

“STY” (Inflammation of the eyelid)

“Glaring gaze.” They are looking at life through angry eyes, due to a sense
of being betrayed by someone. They feel victimized and turned on, and they
are deeply resentful about it. This may be a chronic pattern for them, in
which case it came from a victimizing and frequently betraying family.

RIGHT EYELID “STY”

“Ship of fools.” They have intense anger at what they see in the world.

LEFT EYELID “STY”

379
“Screwed over.” They are full of indignation about what they see happening
to them.

Section 5

380
381
E

171

382
E

383
172

173

174

175

176

177

178

179

180

384
181

182

183

184

185

186

187

188

385
189

190

191

192

193

194

195

196

197

386
198

387
FACE PROBLEMS

“Who am I?” They have a real identity problem, and they are in conflict
over what they show to the world. They have feelings of humiliation, rage,
sorrow, guilt, worry and/or bitterness about themselves, and they feel
rejected by the world. They also have a rather pronounced tendency to
belittle themselves in comparison to others.

There is a fear of being themselves and a self-avoidance, with attendant

distortions and disruptions of their daily routine, untoward events, illness,
etc. They feel that they have to “fake it to make it” or to “put on a public
face,” and they resent it and its effects. It is the result of a “Don’t be you!”
injunction from their family.

*************************************

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They are quite competence-anxious, and they

operate under the strain of considerable fear and agitation about their ability
to make it. They feel that they don’t have what it takes to make it, and they
can’t deal with a situation, person or issue as a result. They are prone to
have a lot of troubles with relationships, and they often end up in effect
losing face -- an outcome that they dread. They were consistently
denigrated and confidence-undermined by their dysfunctional and
enmeshed family.

RIGHT FACE PROBLEMS

“Persona problems.” They are experiencing difficulties in manifesting

themselves in the world and/or issues around whether and how much to
show the world about who they are.

LEFT FACE PROBLEMS

“Moral cretin loser.” They are deep in conflicts about who they are -- a
sense that they are somehow bad, wrong, inadequate and/or unacceptable.

FACE NERVE PAINS, SEVERE

388
“Spiritual conundrum.” They are obsessed with the issue of acceptability to
God. They are prone to feel so intensely Cosmically incongruent that they
feel that they have to have severe punishment. There is no self-forgiveness
and no self-trust, and they suffer from continuously guilty feelings. They
were made to feel “bad, wrong and evil” from the very beginning, resulting
in the impression that “God hates me.”

********************************

“Self-avoidance.” There is very poor communication within them, a

blockage or distortion that is causing them great pain. They are also in
conflict over what they should show to the world. They have intense
feelings of humiliation, rage, sorrow, guilt, worry and/or bitterness, with a
fear of being themselves that results in systematic self-eschewing. They
were not allowed to be themselves as a child by their rejecting family.

********************************

“Fraud feelings.” They are in anguish over their communication difficulties

with others, and about their whole situation. They feel that they have to
“fake it to make it,” and they resent that and its effects. They have little
sense of capability and cope-ability, and there are no feelings of support
from the Universe.

They are in effect running away from themselves, their family, life --
everything. They feel overwhelmed and outclassed by the demands of life,
with the attendant distortions and disruptions of their daily routine,
untoward events, illnesses, etc.

It arises from having too much expected of them as a child. They also
received very little love, and what there was very conditional and heavily
interspersed with guilt-induction, shaming, and intense accusatoriness,
along with a severe “Don’t be you!” injunction.

RIGHT FACE PAIN

“Self-hiding.” They are having great difficulties in manifesting themselves

in the world and/or issues around whether and how much to show the world

389
about who they are, really.

LEFT FACE PAIN

“Moral monster.” They have intense conflicts about who they are -- a sense
that they are somehow bad, wrong, inadequate and/or unacceptable.

FACIAL “TIC” (Involuntary movements of the facial muscles)

“Faltering persona.” They are sitting on a good deal of repressed “violation-

rage.” They feel invaded by the environment. They have a bad case of “run
amok-anxiety” and an equally intense fear of the world knowing what they
feel and want to do. They are deeply afraid of being seen for who they
really are.

They have a history of being wrong-made, rejected and judged. They are
the product of a subtly but inexorably intrusive, invasive, oppressive and
emotionally abusive dysfunctional family.

RIGHT SIDE FACIAL “TIC”

“Wizard of Oz.” They are afraid of being found out a “fraud” who is
“faking it to make it” as a function of their competence-and confidence-
undermining family.

LEFT SIDE FACIAL “TIC”

“Just desserts.” They feel as if something is fundamentally wrong with

them that will lead the world to become invasive.

RIGHT EYE “TIC”

“Don’t get caught!” They are afraid that they will be discovered looking at
or seeing what is happening around them.

LEFT EYE “TIC”

“Cover-blow.” They are deeply alarmed at the possibility of being

“discovered” for “who they are” at base.

390
RIGHT MOUTH “TIC”

“Social anxiety.” They are intensely competence-anxious about social

situations and interpersonal relations.

LEFT MOUTH “TIC”

“Keep your mouth shut!” They have real difficulty dealing with their fear of
expressing their feelings about their life and the world around them,
especially regarding other people. (See “TICS”)

“FAILURE TO THRIVE” (Wasting away in infancy)

“Following the plan.” They only intended to be here a short time -- as a

kind of reconnaissance mission or short shot purpose. They only planned to
be here for the early period, then they would seize whatever opportunities
and processes available to exit.

***********************************

“Left alone.” It is a severe maternal deprivation reaction in an infant whose

mother is doing unto others what was done unto her, only in more extreme
form. Their mother has no inner or experience-based resources with which
to carry out the process of nurturing.

“FAINTING SPELLS;” FAINTING

“Fall apart.” They have a deep fear that they can’t cope, and they are feeling
overwhelmed. They operate out of a lot of catastrophic expectations, and
they are agitatedly alarmed by their present circumstances. They have the
conviction that they don’t have the power, strength, skills, knowledge and
other resources to make it. They are blocking out a threatening situation by
“blanking out” and “blacking out.” There was a great deal of confidence-
undermining from their family.

FALLOPIAN TUBE PREGNANCY

“What are YOU doing here?!” They are intensely ambivalent or rejecting of
being pregnant, in these circumstances, and/or with this child. The result is

391
that the fertilization happened outside the womb. This rare and dangerous
occurrence reflects either the massive intent of the soul of the child and/or
the Universe to have this pregnancy occur despite or perhaps even because
of the mother’s intense resistance, for destiny purposes.

FALLOPIAN TUBE PROBLEMS (Particularly blocking)

“Intense tension.” They are “up tight, out of sight” a lot of the time. They
have a high-strung temperament that drives them to freak out and over-react
to things. They live in constant agitation and “red alert” alarm and
vigilance. They come from a fear-inducing dysfunctional family in which
they had to fend for themselves in the midst of chaos and discombobulation
all the time.

FALLS

“Banana peels.” They are manifesting feelings of being betrayed, let down,
and undermined, with the associated experiences of loss of standing,
humiliation, and hurt pride. This pattern got started in a family which was
very concerned with appearances, and who also were not above “dirty
tricks” in their scramble to come out on top and to look good.

KILLED BY A FALL

“Can’t go on.” They were trying to “swim upstream against the turbine in
hydrochloric acid” all the way along. They had always experienced being
betrayed, let down and undermined -- to the point where they couldn’t
handle the pain and pressure any longer.

They were the product of a severely self-immersed and “persona-fixated”

family system who never had their interests at heart. That set the pattern for
the kind of people and events they would have in their life all the way
along.

******************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the

392
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too. (See “DEATH BY BLUNT
FORCE”)

“FALSE PREGNANCY”

“Frustrated generativity.” They feel thwarted in their capacity, need and/or

desire to create for the next generation. There is a sense of being prevented
from manifesting their destiny. It is an old, familiar story, in that their life
has been devoted to the care and maintenance of others at their own
expense. It got started in a suppressive and exploitative family.

***********************************

“Yes-No!” They are intensely ambivalent about sexuality and motherhood -

- they both want them and are afraid of them. They don’t want the
responsibility of motherhood at some level, and they don’t want to be
sexual and a mother at the same time. It is a result of intensely possessive
mothering as a child.

***********************************

“I want out!” They are intensely determined to “opt out of the fray,” to
withdraw into “kids and kitchen” as an escape from the demands and
threats of involvement in the community. It is a play-out of an underlying
“perennial child” pattern that got started in an over-indulgent and under-
requiring family, so that they never learned the art of coping effectively.
They want to be “taken care of,” with no responsibilities to speak of.

“FARTING” (“Frequent farter”)

“Fear farts.” Something in their current situation is generating a gripping

fear and as yet undigested ideas, along with a sense of responsibility-
overload and the associated resentment. There is a considerable amount of
anxiety and agitated anticipation of aggravating developments. They are
operating with a lot of implication-catastrophizing and generalized dread.

393
They have vague and intangible fears about “things that go bump in the
night” -- the nameless terrors of which they dare not speak. It came from a
“magical misery tour” family experience in which they could never tell
when and what piece of excrement would come off the wall at them just
that it would.

FATIGUE

“Down-timing.” They leave the clock and the refrigerator running while
they shut down everything else and they re-vamp the entire program
through internal processing that takes up all their energy and leaves them
emotionally exhausted.

***********************************

“Why bother?” They are dealing with resistance, boredom and lack of love
for what they are doing with their life. They have opted for disengagement,
accountability-avoidance and responsibility-deflection, in a kind of burnout
reaction. It arose from a family system in which they received a “Don’t be
you!” injunction, and in which anything they did led nowhere.

***********************************

“Struggle-addict.” They are constantly over-extending, over-exerting, and

putting themselves through deprivation, prolonged worry, tension and stress
and strain. This pattern got its start in a similar household.

***********************************

“I’ll try anything!” They have a self-destructive susceptibility to suggestion,

dissipation and repeated shocks to the system. They came up in a
neglectful, perhaps chaotic dysfunctional family, and the only way to get
any support was to do something self-destructive.

***********************************

“Wiped.” They are wrestling with weariness with life and inner tiredness,
because of having to cope or keep going. There is a sense of being

394
inadequate, incompetent, and ultimately uninterested. They have lost their
sense of purpose, and they have gone into an amotivational syndrome. It
comes from having grown up in a chronically severely dysfunctional
family. They have reached the point where their experience is, “Enough,
already!” (See EXHAUSTION)

FATTY TUMORS (Fatty deposits and growths)

“Protective padding.” They are feeling a need for a buffer to absorb the
“slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” They feel unduly vulnerable and
unable to do anything directly about it, so they are “padding up” to weather
the storm. It arises from a history of feeling powerless in an irrational and
assaultive environment, as a function of their highly dysfunctional family.

**********************************

“Preventive medicine.” They have a bad case of “run amok-anxiety,” the

fear that they will somehow “get out of hand.” They have a deep distrust of
their personal power, of their motivational system, and of their
environmental impact. It is the result of a “NOW look what you’ve done!”
and “Can’t you do ANYTHING right!!??” parenting pattern.

“FEEBLENESS”

“Limp noodle.” They are manifesting power-avoidance and an

unwillingness to stand up for their principles or to shoulder their
responsibilities. They are feeling overwhelmed and under-resourced. It
comes from a systematically disempowering family.

“FEMALE PROBLEMS”

“She-jection.” They are denying of their self, and they are rejecting their
femininity and the feminine principle. It comes from their having been
shamed for being female by their family, due either the mother’s self-
shame, the father’s rejection, and/or their wanting a male child.

************************************

395
“Father-fury.” They are full of resentment over felt betrayal by their father.
Her experience was that he was never there for her, that he promised and
reneged, that he was hopelessly inadequate, that he was abusive and/or
incestual or he put her through other experiences of betrayal. She might also
have picked up her mother’s “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick
anything with three legs). In any case, she has real problems dealing with
the concept of having a mate.

************************************

“Self-suppression.” She is into power-avoidance to appease their mother, to

reassure her that she will not abandon her. Her mother had become
symbiotically attached and dependent on her, and she programmed in a
strong “Don’t leave me!” injunction.

*************************************

“Abandonment-paranoia.” They are having attachment problems and

abandonment-anxiety issues arising from being threatened with
abandonment, as either a disciplinary technique and/or as a means of
preventing her from “growing away.”

*************************************

“Slave-rage.” She has a lot of resentment over her “serve-aholic” pattern

that was generated in a dysfunctional family who placed them in the
“family hoist” position, or who fostered a rescuing pattern.

*************************************

“Running on empty.” They are having endurance problems arising from the
feeling that they have to “sell themselves out” to survive. This pattern
developed in a household who made it very clear to her that if she intended
to have any support, she was going to have to “pay for it in spades.”

*************************************

396
“Sexual competence-anxiety.” They are hung up and obstructed in their
ability to relate to their sexuality. They feel insufficient to the cause in their
ability to function and perform in the sexual arena.

It arises from a considerable amount of fear and/or guilt about sexuality.

They are the product of a sexually denigrating and inhibiting family, or they
are the victim of excessive and invasive sexualizing parenting.

FEMALE SEXUAL AROUSAL DISORDER

“Dry river bed.” She can’t lubricate or she can’t enjoy it. It comes from
possessive imprinting and “tripod-rage” induction from her mother and/or
from a history of aversive experiences in the sexual arena. (“Tripod -rage”
is the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs).

FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME (Severe birth defects due to alcohol

ingestion during pregnancy)

“Time out.” They are manifesting a “forced vacation” life involving their
having to be in effect completely taken care of. The intention of the soul is
to use this life as one in which they assimilate what has gone on before in
preceding lives. It is probable that there is also some karma with alcohol.

FEVER

“Burning up!” They are “burning up” with intense anger and stored
resentments. They have a lot of agitated worry and hurry in fear of
anticipated outcomes. There is a severe lack of harmony and internal
conflict.

They are highly resistant to the processes of life, and they are hung up in
the past. They have a fear of or reaction to loss of friendships, and they
suffer from abandonment feelings.

It represents an experienced return to the uncertainties and frustrations of

their dysfunctional and abandonment-threatening family.

“FEVER BLISTERS”

397
“Festering fury.” They are suppressing angry words, and they have a real
fear of expressing them. The issue is grief-rage and an underlying sense of
deservingness of the loss of resources they have experienced and the ones
they are undergoing now. It reactivates early deprivation reactions from a
time when to object to losses only made it worse, in their self-immersed or
dysfunctional family.

**********************************

“Over-burdened.” They are feeling that they are being required to do too
much, and that they are under pressure to perform. They have the
experience that they are in over their head, and that they just can’t meet the
requirements of life. They are resentful over their situation, but they are
unable to do anything about that either. They are the product of a
suppressive, demanding and non-nurturing family.

**********************************

“Love-hunger.” They are harboring festering angry words and a

suppression-producing fear of expressing them. The issue is grief-rage and
an underlying sense of deservingness over the losses of resources they have
experienced in their relationships. It reactivates early deprivation reactions
from a time when to object to losses only made it worse in their self-
immersed or dysfunctional family.

RIGHT MOUTH BLISTER

“Restriction-resentment.” They are experiencing anger over who they are

being forced to be and/or over how they have been restricted in their
manifestation in the world.

LEFT MOUTH BLISTER

“Squashed selfhood.” They are suffering from despair and resentment over
how they have not been allowed to be themselves.

FIBRILLATION (Abnormally rapid heartbeat)

398
“False alarms.” They are a self-made person who believes that they are all
they’ve got. They have felt cut off from the environment and the Universe
all their life, and they therefore have felt that they have to handle everything
on their own hook, unassisted.

This activates moments where things are getting out of control and beyond
their coping capabilities and these bring on anxiety attacks -- complete with
heart palpitations. It is the result of never having received love and merging
as a child. (See “LONG QT” SYNDROME)

FIBROCITIS (See MUSCLE PROBLEMS)

FIBROIDS (Benign tumors and cysts in the womb)

“She-jection.” They are caught up in rejection of their femininity, sexuality,

womanhood and/or motherhood. They are manifesting accumulated or
unexpressed guilt, shame, inner confusion or past hurts and abuse that they
attribute to their being female. They are the product of a patriarchal and/or
misogynistic household.

**********************************

“Betrayal reaction.” They are nursing a hurt from a partner, in what feels
like a repeat of the devastations of her childhood. There has been a blow to
the feminine ego that represents to her a re-run of her experience with her
father and/or “proof positive” of the accuracy of her mother’s “tripod-rage”
(the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs).

FIBROMYALGIA

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread-
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.
They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-
exhaustion. They are the product of perfectionistic parenting.

**********************************

399
“Self-distrust.” They have great difficulty coordinating the execution of
things, integrating ideas of what is wanted to be accomplished with the
pragmatic results they are getting, and dealing with the feelings and issues
associated with success.

They have little sense of competence and confidence, and they are having
significant problems in mobility, flexibility and activity. They have to be
extremely inhibited and careful in all they do, or they become immobilized
and unable to take action.

It arises from an intensely self-distrust-inducing “keep them around the old

homestead” family, who programmed them to be super-successful (for the
family only), and to otherwise fail. They have “come up a cropper” in
reaction to the re-emergence or continued confrontation with this dilemma,
and it has effectively immobilized them.

**********************************

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are resistant to new experiences and
they are refusing to move on in life. Unsettling memories are surfacing, and
they must confront issues that have been long put off.

There is either guilt-based self-punishment and atonement-seeking or a

belief in bondage, victimization and victim-tripping. In any case, they have
a deep feeling of separation and sinfulness, arising from massive guilt-
induction their family for who they were, what they needed, what they did,
and what went down in the family.

FIBROUS GROWTHS

“Self-disgusted life-rejection.” They have an intense feeling that “Things

just don’t work out for me.” They have a jaundiced feeling that the
Universe is biased against them, partly arising from their misuse of life
energy in past lives. Underneath, they have the rueful feeling they are
getting their “just desserts.”

It arose in a highly dysfunctional family in which things never worked,

especially for them. It is also probable that they have had to rescue their

400
family and family standins to “atone” for their “evilness.”

“FIFTH SYNDROME” VIRUS (Dry red rashes-highly contagious)

“Resentful resignation.” They are having the experience that life is being
quite difficult, and they are feeling very little, if any joy. To them, it feels
like everything is one long series of responsibilities, traumas and drudgeries
of late. It is a result of a “grimly getting through the night” dysfunctional
family.

**********************************

“Roughed up.” They feel that they are being rubbed the wrong way. There
is a sense of being attacked, a fear of harm, and an abiding insecurity. They
are the product of a wrong-making family, especially by their mother.

**********************************

“Off with their heads!” There is a chronic intense irritation over delays of
gratification, along with a notable lack of patience. They have a pronounced
tendency to “infantile tyrannosaurus” tactics. They are simply unable to be
cooperative, to be respectful, to be considerate or to go with the flow of life.

They were not allowed to differentiate and to individuate as a child, and

they are still symbiotically attached to the “tie that grinds” with their
mother, and her standins.

**********************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are plagued by embarrassment and

shame for who they are. There is considerable guilt about their feelings,
intentions, motivations, actions and/or thoughts. It is the result of having
been made to feel “bad, wrong and evil” for having wants, needs and
desires as a child. (See the affected areas for more information)

FINGER PROBLEMS

“Destiny fine tuning.” They are having hassles about handling the details of
life, about how to implement who one is and what one’s purpose is. It also

401
has to do with limitations of imagination, their fantasies, and inspirations
and creativity.

In addition, it involves difficulties with direction-setting, integrating

personal values with work in the world, and fear of the loss of loved ones.
There are also concerns about social standing, power and prestige. They
may be reaching out too far, trying too hard, or doing too much.

All of these problems derive from a family which systematically engulfed

them and undermined their capacity to become an independently
functioning and successful individual.

ARTHRITIC FINGERS (Inflamed, painful, swollen, stiff and perhaps

deformed)

“Attacking back.” There is a desire to blame and punish, arising out of a

feeling of being victimized and unable to do anything about it. It is a
learned helplessness and a furiously frustrated desire to control everything.
There is a suppressed desire to strangle the one(s) who are responsible for
their felt plight in life. It arose from a severely suppressive household.

THUMB PROBLEMS

In general, it represents difficulties in the manifestation of the will that were

generated in a self-serving home environment.

There are five types of such difficulties:

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are conjuring up worries in the mind that

undermine the manifestation of their intellect, will, energy, personal
power, strength of character and ability to make things happen.
“Under their thumb.” They are engaged in willfulness and selfishness,
with a particular emphasis on coercion and extortion.
“Rage-aholic.” They are manifesting an inability to accept aggravation
and to turn the other cheek, with irritability and temper tantrums.
“Demoralized.” They are plagued by depression and guilt that
immobilizes them.

402
 “Self-protection.” They are caught up in the felt need to defend
themselves from attack and devastation in a hostile and dangerous
environment.

RIGHT THUMB PROBLEMS

“Self-manifestation problems.” They are having difficulties with their self-

empowerment strategies and methods of manifestation.

LEFT THUMB PROBLEMS

“Self-questioning.” There are issues concerning the nature of the

motivations involved in their manifestation process -- what it is they want
to manifest.

THUMB BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Thwarted.” They tend to suffer from chronic frustration of their ability to

make things go the way they want.

RIGHT THUMB BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Can’t make things go right.” They feel unable to implement things in the
world.

LEFT THUMB BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“What’s the matter with me!?” They are utterly frustrated with their
inability to do things.

THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Alone on my own.” They feel unsupported by the world, and they

therefore fear they don’t have what takes to make things happen.

RIGHT THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Out on a limb.” Their experience is that they are being denied the basic
support they need to impact.

403
LEFT THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“What am I doing here!?” They feel totally unaccepted and unsupported in

life.

THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“My way is the only way!” They are feeling that things are going in the
wrong direction for them to be able to manifest their will and themselves,
and they are strongly resisting it.

RIGHT THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“You’re screwing up the stew!” They have the experience that they are
surrounded by a “ship of fools.”

LEFT THUMB BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Outta my way!” They are furious at the blockages to their intentions and
implementations.

UPPER THUMB SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Motivational self-sabotage.” They have a good deal of competence

anxiety, on the one hand, or of domination-motivation, on the other, which
hinders their successful implementation in the world.

RIGHT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Implementation self-sabotage.” They are constantly getting in their own

way with their competence or domination concerns.

LEFT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Shooting themselves in the foot.” They keep preventing themselves from

success with their motivational conflicts.

UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

404
“Survival-anxiety.” They are having real problems with mental or
emotional feelings of weakness and vulnerability.

RIGHT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I don’t have what it takes to make it in the world.” Their feeling is that
they lack the basic skills necessary for successful implementation.

LEFT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I’m not going to make it!” Their great fear is that they lack fundamental
survival skills.

UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Where do I go?” They are experiencing conflicts about what direction they
want to take in implementing their will in the world.

RIGHT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“How to do it?” They are very unsure of how to go about making things
happen in the world.

LEFT UPPER THUMB SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“What to do?” They are at a loss as to what is their motivation and intention
in things.

INDEX (FOREFINGER) PROBLEMS

“Destiny manifestation concerns.” They are having concerns about the best
way to do things, and about the best direction to go, with particular
emphasis on fear, safety and protection of the ego. A secondary concern
involves the best way to further develop their ego functioning capabilities.

It reflects a crisis of faith regarding the trustworthiness of the Universe and

of the “Home Office.” They have fears about scarcity, insufficiency, lack of
abundance, decreases in resources and benefits, bad luck and lack of
support. They are the product of an alarming and non-supportive family.

405
 ************************************

“Hanging judge.” There is a certain strong judgmentalness, wrong-making

and pointing out of mistakes propensity operating in their functioning. They
came up in a patriarchal, possibly authoritarian household.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Do it right!” They are having issues regarding how to go about getting the
environment to do things the right way.

LEFT INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Self-restraining.” They are experiencing conflicts between their distrust-

based desire to set the direction and the felt need for cooperation-
facilitation.

INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Self-doubts.” They have intentionality issues around self-distrust, run

amok-anxiety, and tendencies to want to attack those seen as being “in the
wrong.”

RIGHT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Integrity-manifestation concerns.” They are worried that they don’t have

the moral fiber to hold to their values in their intentions.

LEFT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Can I trust me?” Their experience is that they are truly untrustworthy at
the deep level, and they feel that they may at any time “let fly with one.”

INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Moral cretins!” They feel that there is a real lack of fulfillment of their
standards and norms in their life that they have to be the one who manifests
sanity in their world -- about which they feel considerable anger.

406
RIGHT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Ship of fools!” They feel that they are surrounded by utter idiots.

LEFT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Psychopaths!” Their experience is that people just don’t give a damn about
what’s important.

INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” There is intense concern around their anger reactions to

where they see the world around them going.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I’ll really screw up!” They are afraid that their anger will result in severe
disruptions of their functioning.

LEFT INDEX FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Careening cannon.” They have the feeling that they are liable to “lose it”
and wreak havoc.

INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have real anger management issues in which

they are concerned about how to go about handling such feelings.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I’ll blow it all away.” They are really alarmed that they might wreak havoc
in the environment.

LEFT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I might blow up.” They are afraid that they are going to end up blowing
themselves away.

407
INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Sanity concerns.” They are having serious issues about their being “crazy”
regarding their anger reactions to the directions that things are taking.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I’ll tear it all up.” They are quite concerned that they might indeed
psychotically destroy the environment at some deep level.

LEFT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Self-destruct.” They are afraid that they will in effect wipe themselves out
in a psychotic type of episode at some point.

INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-control problems.” They are resisting their impulses to act out their
anger at the way things are headed.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Lying low.” They are attempting to prevent their creating trouble in the
environment with their anger.

LEFT INDEX FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-suppressing.” They are deeply distrusting of their rage and its

potential devastating impact on their life.

INDEX FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Indifferent Universe concerns.” They are having real problems with trust
in the Universe and of God. Their feeling is that “Somebody is asleep at the
switch Up There!”

RIGHT INDEX FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

408
“He’s blowing it!” Their experience is that the world around them is in the
hands of an idiot.

LEFT INDEX FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“I’m being allowed to blow it!” They feel that they are being denied
Cosmic support and structure.

INDEX FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I’m all I’ve got.” They have a strong sense of lack of support from the
Cosmos, as they try to instill sanity into the direction things are going.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Give me a hand, dammit!” They feel completely out on a limb as they try
to corral the way things are going in the world.

LEFT INDEX FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEM

“I’m not enough for the job!” They feel outclassed and overwhelmed in
their rescue efforts.

INDEX FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Blame-frame.” They are wrestling with the strong impulse to point in

accusation and wrong-making.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“It’s all your fault!” They desire to “put the blame on Mame.”

LEFT INDEX FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I just hate that about you!” (as their finger of blame suddenly turns back on
themselves). They have an underlying fear that they themselves are to
blame for it all.

MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

409
“Backed Off.” They are having issues around the channeling of life energy,
power, anger, creativity and sexuality. Issues in this finger are the outcome
of self-immersed and/or sex-ploitative parenting.

This can take three general forms:

“Intimacy-incompetence.” They are having issues about being able to carry

out their responsibilities and the requirements of intimacy. They feel that
they are in effect severely damaged in the motivational and manifestational
capacities that are involved.

“Duty-dominated.” They have an over-focus on things that must be done

NOW. They emphasize limits, restrictions, denials and delays, with a “law-
and-order” orientation. Or they put a great focus on hardships and the like.

“Rebound blues.” They are experiencing self-rejection issues arising from

the breakup of a significant “A-frame” dependency-based relationship.
They are prone to things like drug abuse, dissipation, cruelty as an ego-
bolster, etc.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“How do I do it?” They have issues around how to go about channeling life
energy, creativity and sexuality -- strategies, tactics and techniques.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Should I do it?” They are experiencing conflicts about whether to express

life energy, sexuality and creativity, creative inspiration. It’s due to
blockages, powerlessness feelings, issues about intimacy, involvement and
vulnerability, etc.

MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Don’t deserve.” There are conflicts around accepting their resources such
as their humble abode, due to a strong guilt-grabbing propensity.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

410
“I shouldn’t have this.” They have a lot of discomfort regarding their
environmental equipment and surrounding resources.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Worth-denigration.” They have a rather pronounced propensity to put

themselves down in reaction to their resources.

MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Bad, wrong and evil.” They that they “caused World War II,” which is
what their family made them feel. They are therefore having trouble
believing they deserve to have support from the Universe.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“This is wrong!” They feel that it is somehow immoral for them to have
environmental resources.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I’m evil.” They feel at some level that they are inherently vile for being
who and what hey are.

MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-constraining.” They are holding themselves back on the basis of both

non-deservingness and self-distrust issues.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I don’t dare!” They are afraid of their environmental impact if they release
themselves.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I shouldn’t!” They are convinced that they are some sort of “moral cretin”
who is not allowed to manifest themselves for fear of what might happen.

411
MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“NOW!!!” They are having problems with patience, the ability to wait, to
delay gratification, and the like. They have strong ideas on how things
ought to be.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“My way is the right way!” They have the strong conviction that they have
the direct pipeline to the Cosmos on what is the correct way to do things.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I want it all!” They are intensely impatient and imperious about how
things should be for them.

MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Cosmic non-concern.” They are feeling a sense of non-support from the

Universe around being able to get things set straight.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“All by myself.” They feel that they are conducting a moral crusade
unassisted.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Alone on my own.” Their experience is that they have to meet life’s moral
requirements with no help.

MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Cosmic distrust.” They are resisting the flow of events, due to a distrust of
the Universe.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

412
“Heel-digging.” They are refusing to cooperate with the environment, out
of a sense of its being wrong or unsafe.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Oh no you don’t!” They aren’t about to let the Cosmos screw them over.

MIDDLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are undergoing self-image and self-acceptance issues.

They feel like they are not in a position to be able to be trusted to
successfully implement their creativity, personal power and sexuality.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“I’ll blow it!” They have the distinct impression that there is something
inherently incompetent about them that will disrupt their environmental
impact.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“There’s something wrong with me!” They feel they are some sort of
“damaged goods” who can’t be trusted or allowed to manifest themselves.

MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Sanity-anxiety.” Life’s vicissitudes and difficulties have undermined their

sense of their personal sanity to some extent.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I can’t be trusted.” They are sure that they would do a psychotic run amok
if left to their own devices on the underlying level.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I can’t believe my own perceptions.” They are deeply alarmed about their
own experiences -- that they are somehow unreal.

413
MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-repression.” They have a basic self-distrust, leading to self-restraint

and to resistance of their releasing.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I don’t see me doing it!” They have a basic pattern of non-perception of

the ecological impact, leading to a generalized self-suppression.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I won’t!” They have a severe generalized self-suspiciousness that leads

them to simply refuse to participate in life.

RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Blocked flow.” There are issues regarding their personal significance and
worth concerns, particularly their financial standing, authority and primary
relationships. It also reflects their relationship with discipline, responsibility
and work. Finally, it reflects their difficulties with their relationship with the
“Home Office.”

In all cases, the underlying problem is their grief and their inability to flow
with life. It can result in several patterns, all of which arise from a family in
which there was relatively littler awareness or concern for how things
would affect their sense of personal significance and worth.

This, in turn, can result in several patterns, namely:

“Compulsive contribution.” It can lead to a workaholic and achieve-aholic

trip.

************************

“Arrogant pride.” It can result in authoritarianism, superciliousness,

disdainfulness, and a feeling of being ignored or belittled.

************************

414
“Money-madness.” It can lead to basing their self-evaluation on their
“Dunn & Bradstreet” status, cheating and corruption, etc.

************************

“Abandonment-anxiety.” It can drive them into jealous possessiveness,

relationship-incompetence, commitment issues, and feeling separated from
the “Source.”

RIGHT RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Worth issues.” This is reflective of issues around money-acquisition and

other forms of worth-establishing, around how to establish their authority
and position, around the best ways to carry out their responsibilities, around
how to work with relationships, and around spiritual practices.

LEFT RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Self-manifestation issues.” They are involved in conflicts around ethical

issues, spiritual concerns, letting-love-in problems, and deprivation-grief
reactions in relationships. They are also concerned with which direction to
go with regard to their contributions, karma-handling, and self-worth
manifestations.

RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Worth-grief.” They are prone to have intense underlying self-worth issues,

with a resulting neurotic relationship with money.

RIGHT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Wealth is worth.” They are convinced in their bottom line beliefs that their
value is reflective of their abundance, and visa versa.

LEFT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Worthless turd.” They have a deep-seated conviction that they have no

value, significance or meaning in and of themselves.

415
RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Hurt pride.” They feel under-rated, and that they have experienced either a
loss in standing or a lack of standing in the world.

RIGHT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I want it -- I deserve it!” They have the feeling that they have been
deprived of their rightful standing.

LEFT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Why is this happening to me!?” They can’t understand how it is that they
are not being given the standing they believe they deserve.

RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Financial focus.” They are afraid to change their pattern of equating their
worth with their standing and their financial status.

RIGHT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I’d be lost!” They have an underlying terror of loss of abundance and

standing.

LEFT RING FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I am valueless.” They have a firm premise that they have no true worth in
their own right.

RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Money-mad.” They react to karma-handling with a considerable amount of

worth-anxiety, along with a compensatory monetary pursuit, at the expense
of their relationship with their significant others.

RIGHT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

416
“Bottom line.” They evaluate things in terms of their monetary significance
-- to the exclusion of personal value and relationships.

LEFT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT

“Island unto themselves.” They have a seriously damaged ability to form

close personal relationships.

RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Unloved.” They feel unsupported by their loved ones, and they feel
unvalued regarding their worth and contributions.

RIGHT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT BONE PROBLEMS

“I count, dammit!” They are deeply disturbed by indications of lack of

relationship or valuing.

LEFT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT BONE PROBLEMS

“Do I count?” They have significant underlying doubts about their

deservingness of relationship or valuing.

RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Karma-dodging.” They are resisting the requirements to handle their

karma from past lives and from mis-moves in this life.

RIGHT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT --KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Blame-throwing.” They are strongly inclined to attribute all non-positive

things to others.

LEFT RING FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“It’s not my fault!” They are extremely blame-avoidant, out of an

underlying unconscious severe self-blame.

RING FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

417
“Value-anxiety.” Their sense of personal worth and significance is a major
issue with them. They have problems being able to reassure themselves
with their accomplishments.

RIGHT RING FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“See what I’ve done!” They feel that they have to constantly prove their
worth -- unsuccessfully.

LEFT RING FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Do I have any real value?” They have deep underlying issues regarding
their personal worth.

RING FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Blowing it.” They have the feeling that God is in effect saying that
everything they do is “not good enough.”

RIGHT RING FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Stumble-bum.” They have the experience that they are forever somehow
screwing things up.

LEFT RING FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Cosmic competence-anxiety.” They have the fear that they don’t have the
necessary capabilities for meeting the requirements of the Universe.

RING FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are resisting the flow of life because they don’t trust
the Universe, and they are afraid that anything they do will only make their
sense of non-worthiness worse.

RIGHT RING FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I’ll blow it!” They have a lot of concern about their ability to not get in
their own way in doing things.

418
LEFT RING FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“I don’t have what it takes.” They feel that they lack the fundamental
qualities of worthiness.

LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Self-projection issues.” There are conflicts around connection,

communication, freedom of discretion, family involvement, gender identity,
manifestation, business, persona-fronting and pretense. They have a fear of
being themselves with other people. It is in reaction to experiences of
pretense, deceit and lack of compassion or forgiveness in their childhood.

The source of difficulties here is likely to center on divided loyalties and

conflicting demands in their childhood between their relation to their family
and their involvements in the world, including the spiritual realm.

This can result in a number of patterns:

“Urban hermit.” They can become involved in the “among us but not of us”
trip, where they operate like a “sealed unit” anthropologist.

*********************************

“Compulsive eccentricity.” It can lead to “outsider” difficulty in

communication that ends up in rejection-eliciting.

*********************************

“Authority-freak.” It can generate control-avoidance, compulsive

individuality, and rebelliousness patterns.

*********************************

“Us vs. them.” It can create conflicts between involvements in the world vs.
investment in the family.

*********************************

419
“The other-expression issues.” It can make for confusion about how to
manifest the other gender qualities in oneself.

*********************************

“Persona problems.” It can result in an “all business” approach or a

continuous image-concern.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Social standing strategy issues.” They have conflicts around how to make
and keep social connections, around communication processes, around
option evaluation strategies, around self-expression approaches, around
business tactics, around tying everything together, etc.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Connection concerns.” There are issues about intimacy, about

connectedness, about social acceptance, about gender manifestation, about
being “gotten,” about expressing their spiritual side, etc.

LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Sealed unit.” They have a problem with distantiating from others,

separating themselves out, and the like.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Urban hermit.” They have a pronounced propensity to operate in an

“among us but not of us” manner.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Island unto themselves.” They are strongly inclined to live within

themselves in a manner that is cut off from connection with others.

LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

420
“Rejection-expectations.” At base, they feel vulnerable and weak in relation
to other people, and they anticipate ejection and exclusion.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Ejectee-rejectee-dejectee.” They often find themselves at the outskirts of

any social group.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are prone to feel that they are simply
not acceptable in human society.

LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Staying away.” They are prone to be to be rigidly self-protective and

socially avoidant.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Social cocoon.” They have strong propensity to stay to and within

themselves.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER BASE SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“They’re after me!” Their experiences are that they are in effect unsafe in
the world other people.

LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Image issues.” They have problems around willingness to carry out the
“apprenticeship process,” such as handling menial tasks, etc.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Social aspirations.” They seek to a position of standing, and they find

infrastructure involvements unacceptable.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

421
“Beneath me.” They are very social status-conscious, and they regard direct
participation in low status activities insulting.

LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEM

“No appreciation.” They have the feeling that they are not being recognized
for who they are, and that they are being under-rated.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Validation-seeking.” They are rather strongly inclined to acquire signs of

significance.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Do you know who you’re talking to?” They are quite concerned about not
being acknowledged.

LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Resistance-fighter.” They are prone to be chronically rebellious and

alienated, as they resist the way things are done.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“My way or the highway!” They are insistent on doing things in their
manner.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER MID-SEGMENT -- NUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Right and righteous.” They have strong opinions about how things should
be.

LITTLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Persona issues.” They have gender-expression, interpersonal

communication, and business involvement issues, in terms of how to carry
these off, and whether to do so.

422
RIGHT LITTLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Propriety-concerned.” They are quite concerned that social

appropriateness is always maintained.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER TIP PROBLEMS

“Fabric of society.” They consider it their mission to make sure that the
social order is protected at all times.

LITTLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Competence concerns.” They feel like a “fraud” and that they are
somehow “in over their head.”

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Failure-fearing.” They tend to be rather intensely concerned that they will

fall short of the need.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Phony-baloney.” They have the feeing that they are “faking it to make it,”
and that they are going to be “found out.”

LITTLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Role rigidity.” They are resisting making changes in the way they relate to
people and to the world.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Role-fixated.” They are quite entrenched in their manner of relating to the

social environment.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER TIP -- KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“One and only one way.” They are quite righteous about the proper role that
they should play interpersonally.

423
FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Abundance issues.” There are significant concerns regarding the process of

relating to and managing their personal and environmental resources. They
have difficulties acquiring, dealing with, receiving, and holding on to
resources, because of family culture regarding this area.

They were in effect given the message by their family that either they do
not deserve abundance or it is problematic/dangerous to have abundance or
even real sustenance. The worst case of this is “skid row” programming.

THUMB/INDEX FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“World relations issues.” There are difficulties in manifesting their will or

their sense of the best way to go, vis-à-vis their relations with the
environment.

RIGHT THUMB/INDEX FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Soul expression questions.” They have issues regarding the release or

expression of their personal power, in regards to how to do things the
“right” way.

LEFT THUMB/INDEX FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Self-interest manifestation issues.” They are involved in conflicts about

their motivations and their social ecological impact, as they seek to
intervene on their own behalf.

INDEX/MIDDLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Essence expression concerns.” They have difficulties around the

manifestation of their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs.

RIGHT INDEX/MIDDLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Ecological effects questions.” They have issues regarding how to impact

the environment in the “best” way regarding their life energy, creativity,
sexuality and relational needs.

424
LEFT INDEX/MIDDLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Self-manifestation concerns.” They are experiencing conflicts concerning

their right to have or express their life energy, creativity, sexuality and
relational needs, given the social ecological impacts and implications
involved.

MIDDLE FINGER/RING FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Worth issues.” They are experiencing issues around their manner of

expression of their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs, in
regards to their personal worth and significance in the light of their financial
situation, position, responsibility, power and spiritual concerns.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER/RING FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Self-expression questions.” They are having difficulties in manifesting

their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs in a manner that
does not undermine their sense of worth, significance, power, position,
financial security, responsibility and spirituality.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER/RING FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Self-manifestation ethical issues.” They are experiencing conflicts

regarding moral and spiritual issues in terms of their right to express their
creativity, sexuality and relational needs, and their right to receive love.

RING FINGER/LITTLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Significance issues.” They are having difficulties regarding their personal

worth, in relation to their felt safety concerning being themselves as it
affects their intimate relationships, financial security, work world and
spiritual life.

RIGHT RING FINGER/LITTLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Worth-manifestation questions.” They have issues around how to go about

manifesting their personal worth financially, ecologically and relationally in
a non-alienating manner.

425
LEFT RING FINGER/LITTLE FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Success concerns.” There are conflicts regarding their right to relational,

social, and financial success and connectedness.

FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Vulnerability concerns.” They are feeling unprotected in an indifferent or

hostile world -- like a crab out of its shell. They also feel very much alone,
with no supportive friends. It arose from their not being nurtured and taken
care of at a very early age.

*************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have issues with anger and aggression or

concerns about being discovered in their hostility or subtle or not-so-subtle
attacks at one level or another. This came from a household in which there
was a great deal of emotional violence, either overtly or subtly.

*************************************

“Self-serving.” They are given to greedy thoughtlessness and insensitivity.

Their functioning could be characterized as a matter of “Me first, last and
always!” They grew up in an equally self-immersed family.

*************************************

“Perfectionism.” They have a mania for precision and control, for

punctilious perfection with a “hands on” detail-dominated approach. They
are forever fretting over miniscule details.

They were subjected to “never good enough” parenting, and it generated a

massive worth-anxiety problem which they have handled by seeking to
precisely determine every outcome they are associated with.

*************************************

“Change-avoidance.” They are prone to reactive agitation and

discombobulation in response to the changes in their direction and activities

426
in the world. They are intensely resisting the changes, and they are having a
hard time dealing with them. They are the product of an unstable
dysfunctional family, and as a result, order, predictability and sameness are
extremely important to them.

THUMB NAIL PROBLEMS

“Will-expression questions.” They have concerns regarding the

implementation of the intentions, motivations and aspirations -- of their
will.

RIGHT THUMB NAIL

“Self-release-anxiety.” They are having difficulties in the manifestation of

their will -- fear of excessive willfulness, or will-derailing reactions to their
situation.

LEFT THUMB NAIL

“Motivational and value dilemmas.” They are involved in conflicts

regarding what they want to manifest or prevent.

INDEX (FOREFINGER) NAIL PROBLEMS

“Cosmic relations questions.” They have issues around their relationship to

the Universe -- with particular regard to how to best deal with It.

RIGHT INDEX FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Intention-implementation issues.” They are having difficulties in deciding

how best to go about putting their intentions into effect.

LEFT INDEX FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Environmental relations concerns.” They are experiencing conflicts around

self-intentions vs. ecological needs regarding the implementation of their
intentions.

MIDDLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

427
“Motivational issues.” There are issues around the expression of their will,
regarding their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs.

RIGHT MIDDLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Will-expression tactics concerns.” They are having difficulties concerning

the strategies and tactics involved in implementing their will, with regard to
the potential ecological impacts involved.

LEFT MIDDLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Soul-expression questions.” There are conflicts regarding their right to

express their will, with regard to their “inner spark” and the meeting of their
life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs.

RING FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Worth-will issues.” They have concerns about the role of their will in the
manifestation in significant and worthwhile ways of their financial standing,
their authority, their relationships, and their spirituality.

RIGHT RING FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Significance concerns.” They have issues around how best to go about

manifesting their will in meaningful ways.

LEFT RING FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Will ethics issues.” They have conflicts about the moral issues involved
with regard to the expression of their will in relationships and intimacy.

LITTLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Social impact of will-expression.” They have concerns about the impact of

the expression of their will on their ability to connect and be accepted.

RIGHT LITTLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

428
“Alienation-avoidance.” They are experiencing difficulties in handling the
expression of their will in a manner that doesn’t drive people away and
isolate them.

LEFT LITTLE FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

“Intimacy impact concerns.” They have conflicts and issues around the
impact of the expression of their will on their intimate relationships, social
acceptance and personal identity.

DARK VERTICAL LINES IN THE NAILS

“Self-accusation.” They have a propensity to attack themselves and to guilt-

grab. It comes from having grown up in a highly blame-throwing and
accountability-attributing family. They were made to feel that, it was all
their fault! (See individual FINGERNAILS for more information)

“HANG NAILS”

“Loose ends.” They have a feeling of unfinished business, like they haven’t
covered the bases that need covering. They feel that “the buck stops here,”
and that they have to hands on handle everything. Not having something
covered makes them nervous.

It arises from having had to fend for themselves a lot as a child. They have
the feeling that they are more or less alone and unprotected in the world,
and that it’s entirely up to them to make sure everything is taken care of.
(See individual FINGERNAILS for more information)

NAILBITING

“Thwartedness feelings.” They are deeply involved in frustration at not

being able to take charge of their life, and they have many unrealized
desires. They are “eating away at themselves” to spite their parent(s) (in
actuality or in their head). They also have a lot of problems in their
relationship to authority. They are very angry that their family didn’t allow
them to grow up.

429
They have a strong fear of annihilation if they develop themselves and
manifest who they really are. They are also full of self-disgust for
capitulating to their programming, resulting in self-attack. They are into
“settle-for” self-sustaining, self-reassuring and self-destructive self-
stimulation. It is the result of a highly manipulative, exploitative and
accusatory dysfunctional family.

**********************************

“Identity confusion.” They are having problems with self-manifestation and

sexual guilt. They were intensely sex-ploitated and subjected to suppressed
parental hostility, so that they were “seduce-slapped,” mind-warpingly
wrong-made, and blamed. They are therefore uncertain of their boundaries,
their motivations, and even their actions. In effect, they don’t know who
they are.

**********************************

“Vulnerability concerns.” They are feeling unprotected in an indifferent or

hostile world -- like a crab out of its shell. They also feel very much alone,
with no supportive friends. It arose from their not being nurtured and taken
care of from a very early age.

***********************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have issues with anger or concerns about being
discovered in their hostility or in their subtle or not-so-subtle attacks at one
level or another.

This came from a household in which there was a great deal of emotional
violence -- either overtly or subtly.

************************************

“Aggression-avoidance.” They are deathly afraid of their assertion and

aggression capabilities. So they systematically bite the instruments of
aggression “to the quick.” It arose from intensely suppressive parenting.

430
 ************************************

“Self-hatred.” They are deeply disgusted with who they are and with how
they operate in and impact on the world. They therefore have an underlying
desire to destroy themselves. They were severely denigrated and devalued
as a child, with the implication of, “Why don’t you do the world a favor and
go play on the freeway?”

FINGERNAIL BROKENNESS AND ROUGHNESS

“Confusion problems.” They have unclear thought processes and sexual

problems. It’s due to suppressed parental hostility and sex-ploitation from a
very early age. As a result, they have difficulty “telling the figure from the
ground,” the salient from the background, and in setting priorities.

This is because contradictory intensely emotionally charged and survival-

significant messages received equal and simultaneous emphasis in their
childhood. As a result of all this, they withdraw into their own little world.

FISTULA (Hole from surface to an inner organ)

“Slow DOWN!” There is a blockage in the letting go process, due to a great

deal of fearfulness. They have no trust in the flow of the Universe, and are
trying to put the brakes on things. Theirs was a singularly frightening
family in which nothing was as it seemed, and in which much that was
horrifying happened in a “happenstance” manner. (See organ(s) affected for
more information)

“FLESH-EATING VIRUS;” “FLESH-EATING BACTERIA”

“Bad, wrong and evil.” They have a very strong belief in being somehow
“negative,” “immoral,” and “unclean.” They also feel that they aren’t good
enough, and that they deserve just punishment for their “wrong-being.”
They have a “rotten” self-image that is massively self-rejecting. They
believe that God hates them. They are immobilized by their limitations,
both genuine and imagined, and they can’t handle life at all.

431
They are the product of a devastatingly destructive and denigrating
dysfunctional family who were abusive, sex-ploitative and shame-inducing.
There never was any love in their life.

“FLICKER-FREAKOUTS” (Headaches, nausea, seizures and other

disturbances in reaction to flickering stimuli)

“I gotta do it MY way!” They have a pronounced tendency to control-

avoidance and exaggerated self-determination, deriving from an underlying
sense that the Universe is not a trustworthy place. They feel that they have
to “hump it” to make it against what appears to be the desire of the “Home
Office” that they not have it too easy.

They are the product of a dysfunctional and depriving family who often
imposed arbitrary restrictions and requirements on them with the
justification that “the way it is” demanded it. So they came to have an
underlying undercurrent of distrust of the Universe and an over-developed
sense of independence and self-direction.

“FLOATERS” (Free-falling dark bits in the ocular fluid)

“Obfuscating issues.” Their perceptions, experiences and reactions are

being distorted by residual vestiges of unresolved traumas and conflicts.
They are the product of a severely dysfunctional, traumatic and/or rejecting
family.

FLU; INFLUENZA (Virus infection)

“At their mercy.” They have feelings of being under the influence of
malevolent forces and of being weak and helpless. It may reflect the
vulnerability feelings that accompany times and processes of great change.
There is a fear of attack from others and of taking life in fully. They have a
strong experience of lack of support and protection. They have the
experience that the very worst is about to happen to them.

There is a good deal of internal conflict, confusion and susceptibility to

suggestion, especially from the “world of agreement” or the “group mind”

432
or “statistical proofs.” They are the product of severely untrustworthy
parenting arising out of a deeply fearful family.

*************************************

“Urban hermit.” There is an insufficient involvement and interaction, an

“among us but not of us” pattern. Underneath is a buried rage and hatred for
their being so alone, alien and alienated.

It comes from a family in which they could do no right as the unrecognized

and unacknowledged “family hoist” upon whom everyone depended and
whom no one supported, sustained or validated.

FLUCTUATING ILLNESS (It comes and it goes)

“Magical misery tour.” They live with chronic uncertainty and confusion as
to the nature of reality arising from a “magical mystery tour” family
experience. It led them to “dance with the second” as the “only way to fly,”
with the result they are highly susceptible to momentary variations in
stimulation and situation.

FOOD POISONING

“Over-run.” They are feeling defenseless and like they have to allow others
to take control and run the situation. It is a “learned helplessness” that leads
them to feel that they don’t have the right to protection, support or
nurturance. They simply expect to “eat shit” as a part of living.

It is a pattern that arose in a family where they had few, if any rights, and in
which much anger and negativity took place, over which no one seemed to
have any control.

FOOT PROBLEMS

“Stuck in place.” They are displaying a fear of the future, and yet at the
same time, they are afraid not to step forward in life. There is confusion
about themselves, other people and life. They prefer strongly to stick where
they are rather than to make disastrous mistakes. They are conservative and

433
afraid to make a move. They operate out of a great fear of the unknown and
out of catastrophic expectations. They have a bad case of “hardening of the
attitudes,” and they take a highly conservative approach that is afraid to
make a move.

They are hesitant and unable to stand on their own two feet. They feel that
they bear heavy burdens, and they can’t carry out their (as yet unknown)
inner ambitions and desires, because they dare not put them into action.
They come from a rigidly conservative and self-immersed family who
cautioned them into submission and intimidation.

*************************************

“Lost in space.” They have difficulty understanding the processes that

underlie what happens around them. There is considerable insecurity, with a
felt need for roots no feeling of having a home. They are therefore
indecisive and unable to stand on their decisions.

They have little feeling of a foundation of their life or of a platform for their
personality. They lack the steadfastness and “rootedness” necessary to carry
their weight in the world. They were left to their own devices in a family
who operated in a confusingly dysfunctional and directionless manner.

*************************************

“Out of touch.” They are afraid to be themselves, whoever that is. They
don’t know what their fundamental premises, innermost dreams, secret
hopes and ambitions are, or they are not be very well-developed in this
arena. They feel that they don’t have a base of operations or a launch pad.
Instead, they have skeletons in the closet, deep-seated fears, and no
comprehension of the past.

They are the product of an enmeshed and dysfunctional family who

systematically undermined their sense of identity or destiny.

*************************************

434
“Ungrounded.” They have no sense of being in contact with material reality,
and no sense of support. They feel that they have “no place to hang their
hat,” and that they have to “live on table scraps and leftovers.” They have
strong feelings of deprivation and denigration and a strong streak of
“martyr” feelings.

To them, life is one long series of tribulations, irritations and frustrations

that keep threatening to get worse. They grew up in a severely self-
immersed and demoralizingly dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Commitment-avoidant.” They are full of fears and limitations based on

emotional memories, and as a result, they are going out of step with the
times. They are in effect paralyzed, and they can’t proceed into the future,
step ahead, or “put their best foot forward.”

They are incapable of facing what is ahead and progressing towards goals.
They are effectively too full of humility and submissiveness. At the same
time, they are sensitive and sympathetic to other people’s situations, and
they let that get in their way.

Needless to say, this got started with a rather terrifying family environment.
They were either the product of similarly demoralized parents or they were
subjected to an extremely oppressive and self-development-preventing
environment.

RIGHT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Relationship concerns.” They are deep in conflicts over how to get life-and
love-support, over relationship issues, and over commitment concerns.
They are looking for ways to keep themselves practically grounded, and
they are trying to find ways to further themselves -- but with a great deal of
trepidation and ambivalence.

LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

435
“Sealed unit.” They are handicapped with vulnerability issues,
unwillingness to receive support, and refusal to allow themselves to be
taken care of by the Universe or by other people. Their history has been
very discouraging of such responses.

FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Competence-anxiety.” They have significant issues and difficulties in

dealing with the processes of living. They fear the world and the
requirements of practicality and effectance. Their experience is that they
don’t have the wherewithal to handle it. They are the product of a
significantly confidence-and competence-undermining possessive,
enmeshed and perhaps dysfunctional family.

FIRST (BIG TOE) FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Floating flotsam.” They have a strong sense of weakness and vulnerability

in the world, with little feeling of groundedness and access to basic
resources.

RIGHT FIRST (BIG TOE) FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Resourceless.” They feel ill-equipped to deal with the requirements of

living in the environment.

LEFT FIRST (BIG TOE) FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Ungrounded.” They have the experience of being impractical in their

approach to the world.

SECOND FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Which way?” They are confused and conflicted about what direction to
take regarding taking their stand in life.

RIGHT SECOND FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Clueless.” They are very unsure about how to go about working from a
position of firm convictions.

436
LEFT SECOND FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“No foundation.” They are at a loss as to what position or stance from

which to come regarding basic premises and values in life.

THIRD FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“No vote of confidence.” They have a feeling a strong sense of lack of

support from their intimates.

RIGHT THIRD FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“No caring.” They have little or no confidence that their intimates are
committed to them or that they will support them.

LEFT THIRD FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“No redeeming social significance.” They have the underlying conviction

that they don’t deserve to have commitment or support from their intimates.

FOURTH FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Involvement-avoidance.” They are having a propensity to not become

meaningfully committed in life.

RIGHT FOURTH FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Vulnerability-avoidant.” They are rather strongly inclined to avoid

significant commitment to the process of involvement with the world.

LEFT FOURTH FOOT BONE PROBLEMS

“Why am I here?” They have in effect retreated to their inner core, like a
cave, and they have doubts about the value of being here.

LITTLE TOE BONE PROBLEMS

“People-avoidance.” They have intense interpersonal connection issues and

a rather pronounced tendency to withdraw from social involvement.

437
RIGHT LITTLE TOE BONE PROBLEMS

“Island unto themselves.” They are strongly inclined to avoid being in

contact and connection with others.

LEFT LITTLE TOE BONE PROBLEMS

“Sealed unit.” They are rather intensely reclusive and emotionally shielded
from vulnerability to other people.

ACHILLES TENDON PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are manifesting an unwillingness to put their

plans into action, to ground their intentions. It arises from a fear of letting
themselves go, from self-distrust. They are afraid they will set off World
War III if they connect to their intentions and allow them to follow through.
It comes from an intensely wrong-making and accusatory family.

RIGHT ACHILLES TENDON PROBLEMS

“Application-anxiety.” There is resistance around the manner which they

are going to utilize in manifesting their intentions. It comes from being
made wrong for the way in which they did things.

LEFT ACHILLES TENDON PROBLEMS

“Catastrophe-avoidance.” They have conflicts around the nature of their

intentions -- fears of what they might wreak if they were to put their
intentions into action. It comes from “NOW look what you’ve done!”
messaging.

HEEL PROBLEMS

“Careening cannon.” They are apt to be rather “shocking” and inclined to

“studied obnoxiousness” and/or to elitist snobbery. This masks an
underlying loneliness and a sense of total unlovability. They are into
“rejecting first,” so to speak, as they are thoroughly rejection-expecting. It
came out of their serving as the “shock-absorber” for the family, both
within and without their intimate family world.

438
RIGHT HEEL PROBLEMS

“Rejection-eliciting.” They engage in systematic alienation-inducing in

their manner of doing things.

LEFT HEEL PROBLEMS

“Professional pariah.” They are feeling like an alien who feels out of step
with everyone, and who makes no bones about it.

HEEL BONE PROBLEMS

“Blame-eliciting.” They are prone to absorb the “slings and arrows of an

outrageous world.” They consistently tend to draw negative events from
both the physical and social environments. They feel responsible for World
War II, and that they might set off World War III.

They also feel deserving of the negative events they attract to themselves.
They were the target of much accusation and accountability-attributions in
their severely dysfunctional family.

RIGHT HEEL BONE PROBLEMS

“Ecological concerns.” They have deep concerns about their environmental

impact system.

LEFT HEEL BONE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They have intense issues about their motivations, in terms

of their ecological impacts.

HEEL BASE PROBLEMS

“Feeling their way along.” There is a deep-seated fear of the unknown and a
pronounced sense of a lack of roots and relevance from which to make
decisions. Their family was more or less cut off from the general culture,
and they had no clear set of priorities.

RIGHT HEEL BASE PROBLEMS

439
“Pragmatically unclear.” They have a feeling of not knowing how to go
about getting things working effectively.

LEFT HEEL BASE PROBLEMS

“Rudderless.” There is a sense of being adrift and of not knowing what’s

important.

SIDE OF FOOT BASE PROBLEMS

“Magical mystery tour.” They have a lack of a sense of the workings of the
Universe such that they are unsure of what leads to what. It comes from a
confusion-inducing dysfunctional family.

SIDE OF FOOT BASE ON THE RIGHT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Odd one out.” They have a feeling that “They’ve got a secret for success
that I’ll never have.” It is a sense of somehow lacking the understanding of
how things work in the world.

SIDE OF FOOT BASE ON THE LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Unclear on the concept.” There is a certain disorientation about just what

the nature of the world is and about who they are, bottom line.

BALL OF THE FOOT PROBLEMS

“No baseline.” They have a deep sense of a lack of basic premises and
foundational beliefs from which to launch their actions. There is a
significant sense of a lack of groundedness in reality and in their values.
Theirs was a rather unbalanced, disorienting and/or diffuse family value
system and lifestyle.

BALL OF THE RIGHT FOOT PROBLEMS

“How do you do it?” They have feelings of intense unsureness about how to
go about doing things, of not having the basic understandings of how things
work.

440
BALL OF THE LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Who am I, really?” There is a sense of identity diffusion and a lack of

clarity about who they are, bottom line.

INSTEP PROBLEMS

“Impact-making questions.” They have great uncertainty about how to

project themselves, and about how to make things happen in the world. It
comes from their not having been either allowed or trained to be able to
implement their intentions.

RIGHT INSTEP PROBLEMS

“Manifestation handicaps.” They have learning disabilities and difficulties

in the process of making things happen.

LEFT INSTEP PROBLEMS

“Self-manifestation issues.” There is considerable unsureness about how to

go about being themselves, and about how to express themselves in the
world.

ARCH PROBLEMS

“Responsibility-avoidance.” They have substantial difficulties in making

and keeping commitments and in taking on responsibilities. They were
subjected to a “keep ‘em around the old homestead” maturity-and
development-deflecting parenting pattern.

RIGHT ARCH PROBLEMS

“My way or the highway.” They have issues about handling the
requirements of the world, in the sense of their insisting on doing things
THEIR way.

LEFT ARCH PROBLEMS

441
“Don’t fence me in!” They feel fenced in and restricted, and they want to be
free, without being tied down or held responsible.

ARCH SIDE-OF-INSTEP PROBLEMS

“Who am I?” They have identity problems and uncertainty about who they
are in the world. It arises from a disorganized or otherwise confusing
dysfunctional family.

ARCH SIDE-OF-INSTEP PROBLEMS ON THE RIGHT FOOT

“How do I do me?” They are manifesting unsureness about how to go about

being themselves in the world.

ARCH SIDE-OF-INSTEP PROBLEMS ON THE LEFT FOOT

“Who-confusion.” They have much confusion about who they are and what
to express of themselves in the world.

OUTER SIDE-OF-INSTEP PROBLEMS

“Can I do it?” They have difficulty in dealing with the demands of the
world, due to competence-anxiety and learning disabilities. It was generated
by an effectiveness-undermining family who wanted to “keep ‘em around
the old homestead.”

OUTER SIDE-OF-INSTEP ON THE RIGHT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Insufficient to the cause.” They have considerable cope-ability anxiety

arising from difficulties in functioning in the world generated by their
family.

OUTER SIDE-OF-INSTEP ON THE LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Learning-anxiety.” They have fear of not being able to learn how to cope
with the world.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE INSIDE PROBLEMS

442
“Don’t deserve it.” They have self-success issues, in the sense of their
having guilt and shame concerning going for their own destiny. It was
generated by a possessive family who wanted to keep them for their own
purposes.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE INSIDE ON THE RIGHT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Self-undermining.” They are prone to studied incompetence and self-

sabotage on the implementation of their intentions, due to family loyalty.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE INSIDE ON THE LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

“It’s not right.” They have guilt and shame around their desires to live their
own life and their own destiny.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE OUTSIDE PROBLEMS

“Can’t contribute.” They are having issues with making a contribution to

the world. Either they are caught in the “tie that grinds” of family-betrayal-
anxiety generated by a “keep ‘em around the old homestead programming,”
or they are feeling restricted by their obligations to the world around them,
due to ignoring and then capitulating parenting.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE OUTSIDE ON THE RIGHT FOOT

PROBLEMS

“Derailed destiny.” They are having difficulties in their ability to manifest

contributions in the world due to disruptions of their functioning generated
by their family of one or the other type described above.

BELOW ANKLE ON THE OUTSIDE ON THE LEFT FOOT PROBLEMS

“Not interested.” There are motivational problems around making a

contribution generated by their family’s handling of them in one or the
other manner described above.

ATHLETE’S FOOT

443
“Rejection reaction.” There is frustration at not being accepted, along with a
fear of being “unfit for human consumption.” They are manifesting an
inability to move forward with ease. They are mentally agitated with the
direction their life is taking. There is an abiding fear of failure and of
moving ahead, along with an underlying self-disapproval.

Both the rejection expectation and the mental irritation arose from severely
conditional love from their parents, and they experienced a great deal of
“never good enough” messaging as a child.

RIGHT FOOT ATHLETE’S FOOT

“Which way to go?” They are agitated and in deep conflict about how to go
about pragmatically generating acceptance and support in their life.

LEFT FOOT ATHLETE’S FOOT

“It’s not right.” They fear that they don’t deserve acceptance and support in
their life. (See the area(s) involved for more information, particularly the
TOES; TOE INTERSPACES)

BLISTERS ON THE FEET

“Rubbing the wrong way.” There are intense mental and/or emotional
conflicts that they are trying to ignore. This pattern got started in their
dysfunctional family in which problem-solving attempts only made matters
worse.

BLISTERS ON THE RIGHT FOOT

“Conflict relief-seeking.” They are concerned about how to go about getting

support from the environment regarding their conflicted situation.

BLISTERS ON THE LEFT FOOT

“They shouldn’t bother.” They feel that they don’t deserve much support
from the environment. (See the locations involved for more information)

BUNIONS

444
“Life’s a drag!” Life is one long series of unwelcome demands, unpleasant
requirements, and joyless experiences to them. The fact is that really don’t
want to be here.

They want to find a “parenting” figure to “take care of them” -- a dominant

relationship in which the other person makes all the decisions. They don’t
want to own themselves, to take their place in the world, or to take
responsibility for themselves -- in other words, to enter more fully into
being here.

They are power-avoidant, sexually guarded, and lacking in grit. There is

much support-seeking and abandonment-anxiety, along with a great deal of
suppressed resentment and self-disgust. They are living with continuous
anxiety and alarm about the requirements of life. Their mother firmly put
them on notice that any form of self-development, independence or self-
empowerment was tantamount to suicide via abandonment annihilation.

So they are intensely rejection-paranoid as they sell themselves out, which

results in a pronated (“pigeon-toed”) posture.

RIGHT FOOT BUNIONS

“Potency-avoidance.” They are rejecting of their means of manifesting

personal power and fulfillment.

LEFT FOOT BUNIONS

“Forget it!” They are shutting down their desires and motivations to
manifest themselves in the world. (See the part(s) of foot/feet affected for
more information)

COLD FEET -- CHRONIC

“Sealed off.” They have a good deal of vulnerability-resentment and

reachability-avoidance. They are an “urban hermit” contact-disliking
people-avoider who is reticent with strangers and a poor circulator who
tends to agoraphobia (the fear of going out of their home).

445
They are rejection-paranoid, and they are retreating into their core. They
feel rejected and not understood and that any reaching out to touch someone
would result in rebuff or worse reactions. They feeling like an “ugly
duckling” who elicits rejection everywhere they go. It all got started when
their parents punished and rejected them for being different and formidable,
because they were frightened by the individual’s potency.

********************************

“Lost in confusion.” They feel cut off from understanding their life
circumstances or their direction, in a learned helplessness situation and
reaction. They want to hit or strangle someone as a result, and they want to
take any and sorts of hostile physical action against them. But they don’t
want others to know how they feel, so they get “cold feet.” Ultimately, they
took it all to heart, and they sadly settled into resignation-apathy, as an
overlay on their intense desire to strike out.

Their family was a chaotic, repressive and power-preventing dysfunctional

system. The individual felt no recourse, and, at the same time, they deeply
resented the treatment they were getting.

RIGHT FOOT CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Forget it!” They do not want support from others or from the environment,
out of a deep distrust.

LEFT FOOT CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Disaster-deflection.” They are systematically vulnerability-avoidance and

involvement-deflecting, in order to prevent their engaging in mayhem, they
fear.

COLD FEET -- TEMPORARY

“Pulling in.” They are manifesting shyness, withdrawal and contact-

avoidance that arise out of their fear of their resentment and anger, with a
resulting retreat into their core to avoid acting it out. Their shyness

446
represents guilt and shame over their angry reactions. They learned in their
family that anger is bad and that acting it out only made matters far worse.

RIGHT FOOT TEMPORARY COLDNESS

“No way, Jose!” They do not want support from others or the environment
out of a “poison apple” reaction.

LEFT FOOT TEMPORARY COLDNESS

“Stay away!” They are systematically vulnerability-avoidant and

involvement-deflecting, out of an underlying self-distrust.

CORNS, WARTS AND KNOTS ON THE FEET

“Self-hobbling.” They are side-stepping issues, due to distortions in their

understanding of the situations and events in their life. They are suffering
from rather intense self-rejection, and it is showing up in self-generated
difficulties in managing things and in moving forward in life. They are
continuously in internal conflict and ambivalence about self-commitment
issues, and this generates knotty issues for them. They are the product of a
rejecting and conflictual dysfunctional family. (See the foot/feet and the
locations involved for more information)

RIGHT FOOT CORNS AND KNOTS

“Unsure of the territory.” They have a way of tripping themselves up with

their conflicts and lacunae in their knowledge, understanding and savvy
about how to go about doing things.

LEFT FOOT CORNS AND KNOTS

“Don’t deserve it.” They are in effect systematically success-avoidant in

their functioning as a function of their self-commitment issues.

HOT FEET -- CHRONIC

“Silently seething.” They feel both powerless in and victimized by the

world. They tend strongly to live “at effect” rather than “at cause,” and it

447
greatly irritates them. They are the product of a passive-aggressive and
suppressive household.

**************************************

“Steamed up.” They are forever fuming over the frustrations and setbacks
of life. Their experience is that they are being constantly thwarted by the
course of events, systems and priorities of the world. They are intensely
willful and one-pointed in their functioning, and they are always running
into conflicts between their priorities and those of the surrounding
environment. They are the product of a patriarchal family who either
capitulated to their demands and/or encouraged their river-pushing style.

RIGHT FOOT CHRONIC HOTNESS

“Blocked action.” Their experience is that they are continually being

prevented from making the kind of impact on things that they want.

LEFT FOOT CHRONIC HOTNESS

“Self-frustration.” They have the experience of “I have met the enemy, and
it’s me.” It seems that every time they set out to do something, they get in
their way.

HOT FEET -- TEMPORARY

“What, AGAIN?!” They have encountered yet another setback in their

efforts to move things forward. They are rather intensely determined in their
functioning, and they don’t take thwarting well. Their family gave them the
expectation that they can make things happen pretty much at will.

**************************************

“Blocked field goal.” They have undergone an experience that is felt to be a

rather highly frustrating setback. They tend to be sensitized to this kind of
thing anyway, since they so often have the feeling that they are forever
finding that they can’t make things happen in their life. They come from a

448
family in which they were indeed prevented from influencing the flow of
events a lot of the time.

RIGHT FOOT TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“They’re at it again!” Their experience is that there is a systematic process

afoot that is designed to derail their progress.

LEFT FOOT TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“Here’s ANOTHER fine mess I’ve gotten me into!” They operate with a
considerable amount of self-distrust, based on how things go for them.

FLAT FEET

“Hoof-in-mouth” disease. They are rather lacking in finesse of

manifestation. They tend to have poor boundaries, and to have little
separation between their inner life and their outer environment, so that it all
spills over onto the ecology in their behavioral output.

They feel rather vulnerable and unprotected, with little capacity to define
themselves effectively. They therefore end up as something of a slipping
and sliding activity-addict who is always on the go, never stopping long
enough to sink roots or to take on connections or responsibilities. They are
quite prone to be systematically commitment-avoidant, and they are apt to
skim over the surface of things, in order to avoid vulnerability.

They learned early on to become a “moving target,” and to never get

ensnared or engulfed. They are hopelessly hooked on their significant
parent, who subtly kept then on the line by artfully playing the “Now you
see it, now you don’t” promise of validation of worth game with the
individual.

SMELLY FEET

“Rejection-expecting.” There is a fundamental self-rejection and self-

disgust that results in a fear of others and of the world. They expect

449
rejection and other unpleasant experiences. They are the product of an
intensely denigrating and shame-inducing family.

SWEATY FEET

“Emotional-commotional.” They display a certain hysterical over-

emotionality. They come from a similar household.

SWOLLEN FEET

“Change-avoidant.” They are holding in their emotions in a determined

effort not to change the direction they are going. They are trying not to be in
touch with their feelings about how their life is going, out of fear of even
worse outcomes. They are the product of a dysfunctional family in which
“Leave well enough alone!” was the modus operandi.

TENDER FEET

“Hurt-nurturing.” They are hypersensitive and overly sympathetic with the

underdog. They identify with them, and underneath they desperately want
someone to care about and care-take them. They are the product of a
functionally neglectful and self-immersed family.

FOREHEAD PROBLEMS

“Walking cerebrum.” They are a hyper-rational and feeling-suppressing left

hemisphere specialist. They form conceptions of what and how things are,
and they then take the stance, “My mind’s made up. Don’t confuse me with
facts!” They come from a similar family background.

************************************

“Pseudo-stupid.” They are experiencing perplexity, befuddlement and

wondering in their thinking. They are engaging in studied incompetent
moves and actions. They were systematically subjected to a “magical
mystery tour” family experience while being programmed to never grow
away by means of undermining their coping capabilities and comprehension
of the world.

450
RIGHT FOREHEAD PROBLEMS

“Environmental confusion.” They can’t seem to get the knack for

comprehending and navigating through the world.

CENTER FOREHEAD PROBLEMS

“Intuition-suppression.” They are afraid of their “natural knowing” so they

avoid it.

LEFT FOREHEAD PROBLEMS

“Self-mystery.” They don’t have a good understanding of themselves as a

person, as a system, or as a citizen.

FRACTURED SKULL

“Shattered paradigm.” Their entire framework about who they are, what
things mean and what it’s all about has been massively assaulted. They feel
that they are “adrift without a rudder,” and they have no guidelines
regarding where things are going or what’s important. They have lost their
sense of direction and values, and they feel betrayed by the “Home Office.”

They don’t have the wherewithal to rise to the responsibilities of their

situation, and they want to “abdicate their position.” It arises from finding
that the fundamental premises of their life were founded on the “shifting,
drifting sands” of a dysfunctional family’s value and operational system,
and they want out of it.

FREEZING TO DEATH

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

***********************************

451
“Ultimate betrayal.” They felt that they have been done in by the “Home
Office,” and that there is no point therefore in continuing. They encountered
a “straw that broke the camel’s back” situation that all-too-fully represented
the pattern they felt they had endured all their life.

They had a “throwing in the towel” reaction to the “slings and arrows of
outrageous fortune” arising from a formative environment in which they
were constantly sabotaged, betrayed, exploited, damaged and prevented
from having their needs and priorities met by their extremely dysfunctional
and self-immersed family.

FREQUENT ILLNESSES

“Taking their marbles and going home.” They feel completely outclassed
and overwhelmed by life, and that they simply don’t have what it takes.
This results in across-the-board stress reactions covering virtually all the
bodily systems, which then sound off the signal that something has to be
done. So they are going with the “pulled out of the action” strategy fulltime.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional family which generated

overwhelmingly stressful situations continuously, and that was so self-
immersed and chaos dominated that they couldn’t or wouldn’t pay attention
to the individual unless they developed an illness. As a result, they have
taken this on as a lifestyle.

FREQUENT URINATION

“Scared pissless.” They feel that they are alone on their own in an
indifferent and potentially dangerous and/or hostile world. They therefore
are on chronic “yellow alert” in a “hockey goalie” mentality. They are all
they’ve got, and “One strike and I’m out!” It is the result of having had to
fend for themselves with no help from any friends from a very early age.

FRIGIDITY

“Get thee behind me!” She is operating out of a basic belief that sex is bad,
along with a denial of pleasure -- both of which are arising from a fear of
her father. She feels it is totally unsafe to enjoy her own body, and she is

452
rejecting of her femininity and of herself as a woman. She is afraid to
confront this feeling within her, and she is keeping it hidden from herself.

She feels that her partner is insensitive, either because she has attracted a
re-run of her father and/or because she can’t believe that a man could ever
be aware of or concerned with her needs. She has a fear of sex-ploitation
and a deep resentment of men.

Underneath, she believes she is unworthy or ugly, and has a deep-seated

guilt or shame. She deals with this by using fear of loss as a desperate
means of controlling the situation, which she couldn’t do as a child.

She is definitely “Daddy’s Little Girl,” as he had an engulfing and crippling

effect on her. She was programmed to believe that sexual joy, involvement
and commitment is hideously immoral and tantamount to patricide or
suicide or both. She feels that she will lose something of great value if she
“gives in” this way. At the same time, her heart really belongs to Daddy,
who never validated her and who often wrong-made.

“FROG IN THE THROAT” (Mucous in the larynx) [Frequently]

“Fear-clears.” There is a rather intense anxiousness about the reception of

what is being said, or about its ultimate impacts and implications. It arises
from a history of much disapproval and wrong-making, often with high
stakes involved.

FRONT HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“Tough-bluff.” They are having difficulties with being vulnerable and

receptive, resulting in their suppressing their tender, caring, loving,
communicating, longing, sadness-and happiness-expressing, and desiring
side. They are very careful in their self-presentation, so as to convey that
they have it all together and there are no chinks in the armor. It comes from
being in a family in which there was little or no consideration of their needs
from the very beginning, and in which “What will the neighbors think?”
was a central consideration.

“FROST BITE” (Damage to extremities caused by freezing)

453
“Done in.” They feel severely betrayed and sabotaged by those who are
close to them or in positions of influence over their situation. They have
been seriously damaged and/or endangered by the significant others in their
life. There is even the possibility of having been lethally dealt with by such
individuals. It comes from never knowing when this would happen in their
severely dysfunctional and potentially dangerously destructive family. (See
the body parts affected for more information)

“FROZEN SHOULDERS”

“Hell no, I won’t go!” They have reached the point where “This is an up
with which I will no longer put!” regarding the responsibilities and
requirements of life. They feel that they have been overloaded and under-
supported and unappreciated, and that they are doing a “sit down strike.”

The problem is they can’t opt out of service, in addition to which the
cumulative damage to the shoulders has reached severe physical form. They
find themselves in deeper water than ever.

There simply HAS to be a reasonable solution worked out so that they don’t
undo the physical healing, and to avoid re-plunging themselves into their
over-responsible role any more. It all got started when they were placed in
the “family hoist” and the “sane one” position in their severely
dysfunctional, self-immersed and at-risk family.

FUNGUS

“Swamp growth.” They are refusing to release the damages of the past,
thereby letting their formative traumas dominate their life. They are
immersed in stagnating beliefs and stationary strategies. The feeling is,
“The war is not over,” that nothing has substantially changed since they
developed their ways of being and doing things in a dysfunctional family.

That, in turn, is a self-fulfilling prophecy effect generated by the assumption

that nothing has changed, so that there is continuous re-validation of the
assumptions and strategies of the past. They are the product of a severely
self-defeat-programming and demoralizingly dysfunctional family who
were effectively intractable and unstoppable in their patterns. (To ascertain

454
more of what the fungus means, check the section of the body the fungus is
growing on for meaning).

Section 6

455
456
F

199

457
F

458
200

201

202

203

204

205

206

207

208

459
209

210

211

212

213

214

215

216

460
217

218

219

220

221

222

223

224

225

461
226

227

228

229

230

231

232

233

462
234

235

236

237

238

239

240

241

463
GALL BLADDER PROBLEMS

“Implied opposites.” They are seeking to project the opposite of what they
are feeling inside, as a survival compensation strategy, so they have a way
of being rather arrogant and seemingly prideful. They tend to be rather
strong to a certain inflation of their self-importance, and to a pronounced
propensity to be judgmental. They have a pronounced tendency to be
power-seeking, dominating and intensely expecting in their relations with
the world.

They are intensely inclined to feel that they are surrounded by a ship of
fools, and that they are not in a position to do anything about it, with a great
deal of resulting resentment. They are apt to be rather self-immersed,
willful and indignantly outraged at the way the world treats them. They
have also ended up systematically grudge-holding and injustice-nurturing.
They come from a patriarchal, position-conscious and supercilious family.

*************************************

“Relationally shut down.” They don’t trust love, and they have had a history
of deeply disappointing relationships. They are rather insulated and isolated
in their relations with other people. They have retreated within themselves
to a state of sad solitude and loneliness.

They were systematically held accountable for things that went wrong in
their dysfunctional family, and they were accused and blamed a lot. They
reacted with an over-compensating self-defensiveness, resulting in a lot of
quiet or overt discord in their family. They felt effectively totally rejected.

*************************************

“I wanna go home!” They have a “beset” experience of life, and they are
greatly agitated about the ways of the world. They find other people
frustrating, disgusting and untrustworthy. They feel that things are just
totally unjust. They just want to get the hell out of here, pronto. They were
rejected from the womb on, and they have a profound self-rejection and
self-revulsion at base as a result.

464
GALL STONES

“Bitterness.” These stony encrustations are due to “stony thinking,” and

they are rigidly unyielding in their orientation. They are apt to be prideful,
judgmental and full of hard thoughts and condemning attitudes. They have
real difficulty in being flexible in their thinking, and they emanate a certain
compulsive contemptuousness.

They are rather bitterly resentful, they are compassionless and unforgiving,
and they are holding back their love from their intimates. They have gone
within into a state of intense solitude and loneliness, self-sorrow and self-
pity. Underneath all this is a severely suppressed intense depression and
grieving, in reaction to a severely depriving, rigid, “right and righteous”
wrong-making family.

“GANGLION” [Soft growth on the hand] (See HAND PROBLEMS)

GANGRENE

“There is no joy in Bloodville.” They are laboring under mental morbidity

and poisonous thoughts that are often arising from guilt or shame over illicit
intentions or actions. They have a severe lack of self-love, sense of security
and felt right to move forward.

It arises from an intensely disintegritous and dysfunctional family who both

generated gross situations and then blame-threw and guilt-and shame-
induced intensely. It was a continuously poisonous environment. (See the
body parts affected for more information)

“GAS;” “GAS PAINS”

“Creature from the Black Lagoon.” Something in their current situation is

generating a gripping fear and as yet undigested ideas, along with a sense of
responsibility-overload and the associated resentment. They have a
considerable amount of anxiety and agitated anticipation of aggravating
developments. They are full of implication-catastrophizing and generalized
dread. They have vague and intangible fears about “things that go bump in
the night,” the nameless terrors of which they dare not speak. It came from

465
a “magical misery tour” family experience in which they could never tell
when and what piece of excrement would come off the wall at them, just
that it would.

GASTRIC BY-PASS (Stapling off part of the stomach to lower food intake)

“Emotional starvation.” They have a deep-seated desperation for love that

leads to excessive “soul-solace” type food intake, which results in
overweight and the resulting operation to inhibit over-consumption.

In a substantial proportion of cases, their emotional issues were not healed

before the operation, resulting in their reacting to the loss of food with a
profound sense of deprivation, of nurturance and of soul-fulfillment. They
can’t satisfy their profound hunger for love, and intense depression is the
likely result. It is the result of early and subsequence emotional
abandonment in childhood.

GENITAL PROBLEMS, FEMALE

“Moral cretin.” They have worries over not being good enough, along with
self-denigration and self-disgust. They don’t trust their feminine receptivity.
They also fear of sex and sexual desire, along with a fear of procreativity
and vulnerability. It is the result of an intrusively controlling, sex-ploitative
and never good enough withholding and judgmental father.

**************************************

“Tripod-rage.” They are operating with an intense irresistible urge to kick

anything with three legs. It was generated originally by an equally
misanthropic mother but revalidated by an abusive and sex-ploitative father,
and by the patriarchal culture. (See OVARY PROBLEMS;
REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS; UTERUS PROBLEMS;
VAGINAL PROBLEMS; VULVA PROBLEMS)

GENITAL PROBLEMS, MALE

“Insufficient to the cause.” They are hampered by worries about not being
good enough, of not being masculine enough, of not being enough of a

466
man, along with a fear of sex and self-distrust about their impact-intending,
initiative and innovation motivation. There is also the issue of whether it’s
safe to be a man.

They were subjected to excessively spousal treatment by their mother,

including expectations of perfection and to be the man of the house, along
with significant sex-ploitation. She was domineering, possessive and
wrong-making. She was afraid to express her animus, of being a man. Her
father was essentially ashamed of being a man.

*************************************

“Moral monster.” They are into intense self-indulgence and self-centered

“infantile tyrannosaurus” coercion or “slick dick” sleazy and sly
manipulativeness. They put out continuous intrusive demandingness,
instability of functioning and irresponsibility.

It arose from a severely sex-ploitative “special” relationship treatment by an

intrusively possessive, over-indulgent and interference-running mother.
Regardless of how and why it occurred, what goes around comes around,
and the karma has now come to roost. (See PENIS PROBLEMS;
PROSTATE PROBLEMS; REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS;
SCROTUM PROBLEMS; TESTICLE PROBLEMS)

GENITAL “WARTS”

“Self-revulsion.” They are full of guilt and self-disgust, and they believe in
ugliness, especially with regard to themselves. They believe they are utterly
unlovable. They have a generalized hatred, especially of themselves.

They are forever letting out little expressions of hate as they experience a
spreading frustration about the future. They are bitterly cynical and angry
about virtually everything at the gut level (though not necessarily
consciously). They also have a felt need for punishment arising out of
severe sexual guilt arising from sexually suppressive and simultaneously
sex-ploitative “tantalizing tarantula” parenting.

467
This was part of the slyly exploitative and negative assumptive
dysfunctional family system which systematically trained them to have a
narrow-eyed and jaundiced view of everything, but especially of
themselves.

G.E.R.D. (Gastro-Esophageal Reflex Disease [Heartburn] -- Burning

distress behind the sternum, due to spasms of the esophagus or of the upper
stomach, resulting in acid coming up)

“Happiness-horror.” They have an intense, pervasive and clutching fear that

is tripped off by their experiencing some joy or happiness. They have a
horrifying sense of impending attack for “undeserved” joy.

They are getting what they want for once, and they feel that somehow they
should not -- that it violates the Cosmic or moral order somehow. They are
anticipating retribution for the just rewards of their efforts and essence.

It was generated in a severely restrictive, disapproving, moralistic and fear-

inducing childhood. They came out of it with an intense fear of the
Universe as a harshly judgmental and punitive place. There is an intense
abandonment-and betrayal-paranoia based in part on past lives.

***********************************

“Purple passion.” They are intensely involved and activated over something
-- love or anger that is very pronounced -- and it is scaring the hell out of
them. They are operating with a pronounced injunction not to feel, and
especially not to feel strongly. It is a pattern that got started in their highly
feeling-suppressing and/or denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“Burning to be free.” They are stuffing themselves and their feelings, out of
a fear of catastrophic consequences if they let go and “let fly with
themselves.” They are now reaching the point where “This is an up with
which I can no longer put!” It comes from growing up in a family in which
it was not acceptable for them to be themselves or to threaten to grow away
by becoming themselves in a destiny-manifesting manner.

468
GERMAN MEASLES (Mild fever and skin rash)

“They don’t like me.” They feel they are being excluded and picked on by
their intimate circle. They feel misunderstood and unappreciated. It is a
reaction to being regarded as something of an irritant or problem by their
family.

GIARDIA (Toxic parasite that induces nausea, vomiting and diarrhea)

“I should have...” They feel personally accountable for everything that

happens, particularly the negative outcomes. Their family held them
accountable and responsible for all that took place. All eyes turned in their
direction when anything ever went wrong -- which was often. They were
made very aware that they had no right to commit to anyone or anything but
continued maintenance of the family.

They therefore have a great deal of guilt about sexuality, success and
intimacy, as if these were “evil deeds.” Any move towards independence,
self-empowerment and significant involvement/contribution/commitment
activates annihilation-anxiety and betrayal-guilt.

**************************************

“At effect, not at cause.” They feel dominated by the world, and they are
therefore feeling dominated, as they let their emotions run them, rather than
taking charge of their reactions to thing. They also tend to give their power
to others, letting them take over everything in their life.

It is a pattern that got started with “never good enough” parenting, to which
they reacted with frantically tying over and over again to get the “God
Housekeeping Seal of Approval” -- and they forever failed to do so, of
course.

**************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are deathly afraid of their own personal power at
the deep subconscious level. They are in effect terrified of releasing
themselves in their internal resources and potency.

469
They were the reversed role parent, the “Sane One” and the “family hoist”
in their severely dysfunctional family, who became extremely dependent
upon and afraid of them. They were therefore subjected to much fear-
induction about owning their own potency and about committing to their
own destiny. It operates as an embedded “foreign body” that leads to
delusional self-destructive stuff induced from the environment, as they
experience it.

PRECIPITOUS EXTREME AND DEMORALIZING NAUSEA,

VOMITING AND DIARRHEA FROM GIARDIA (Potentially lethal)

“Facing the dragon.” They are clearing the poisons from their system and
purging the devastating early programming that generated deep-seated self-
hatred for their potency and positivity, along with severe self-paranoia that
leads to chronic underlying fear/dread. This cleansing/healing process
therefore precipitates a very dangerous implication-panic reaction and a
potential death-out.

GIARDIA LAMBIA (Parasitic protozoa that lodges in the intestinal lining,

producing immune disorder-like symptoms)

“Self-rejection.” They are having difficulties in receiving and feeling

deserving. They tend to be something of a “serve-aholic” who puts their
own needs last in their list of priorities. They feel that they are somehow
“not good enough.” It is in effect a maternal non-commitment, deprivation
or rejection reaction, along with having subsequently been subjected to
perfectionistic expectations.

GINGIVITIS (See GUM PROBLEMS)

“GLANDERS” (Swollen mucous membranes in nostrils and jaw-it comes

from horses.)

“Power-paranoia.” They have a fear of the responsibilities and potentials for

abuse of their personal potency arising from a father-fixation. It is a reaction
to being made to expect that exercise of their potentials will lead to
rejection and attack by their patriarchal family, and later by the male race.

470
GLANDULAR PROBLEMS

“Deep-seated self-distrust.” They are out of balance and in disharmony, due

to their holding onto past traumatic events. They are not able to cleanse
their thoughts and to purify their feelings so as to get on with life’s
processes.

They have difficulty integrating the significance of things, and they are in a
state of continuous alarm. Their creative processes have been severely
curtailed, and their self-image and ability to express their identity have been
disrupted.

Their “get up and go” has “gotten up and gone” -- derailed by self-distrust
and uncertainty of what to do or where to go. They are holding back for fear
of setting off World War III. It is the result of a severely demoralizingly
dysfunctional and perhaps dangerous family.

GLAUCOMA (Fluid pressure increase and the resulting hardening of the

eyeball)

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are operating with a certain stony

unforgivingness and lack of compassion for themselves and others. They
are greatly alarmed by what they see coming for them as they get older and
they are refusing to see accurately. They only want to see what is right in
front of them.

There is an embittered reaction to their life that is being activated by

exacerbating pressures from long-standing hurts. They are manifesting a
long-standing generalized hostility towards the world. They have an
inability to be tender and loving, due to their distrust and disgust. They are
the product of a harsh and judgmental patriarchal family.

***************************************

“Despairing disappointment.” They have the distinct experience that life is

one long downhill slide. They have a rather embittered and disgusted
reaction to much of what happens to them. Their life seems to be a kind of
treadmill in which they are slowly losing ground.

471
They are the product of a highly enmeshed and engulfing but
simultaneously subtly rejecting dysfunctional family who did not want them
to grow away. They were therefore programmed to be systematically subtly
self-defeating and self-undermining in their functioning, in a success-
avoidant pattern.

This, in turn, generates increasing suppressed depression and refusal to

directly look at their patterns. The basic fears are that if they become aware
of their situation, they will “betray” their family, and that if they self-
commit, they will be ostracized or struck dead by God.

RIGHT EYE GLAUCOMA

“Hard-hearted.” They are taking a cold, calculating and perhaps even cruel
approach to the world, in a self-protection strategy.

LEFT EYE GLAUCOMA

“Moral monster!” They have relentless unforgivingness towards

themselves.

GLOBUS HYSTERICUS (See “LUMP IN THE THROAT”)

GLUTEN SENSITIVITY (Abnormal immune system reaction to gluten

that leads to things like asthma, auto-immune disease, cancer, chronic
fatigue syndrome, dementia, diabetes type I, heart disease, hepatitis, kidney
disease, liver disease, psychiatric problems, thyroid diseases, ulcerative
colitis, vitiligo and over 170 other serious disorders)

“What am I doing here!” They are manifesting a dismayed

discombobulation about the world and the way their life is going. It is the
result of growing up in a vaguely overwhelmed and enmeshed
dysfunctional family or of being a “visitor” from another soul pool who
came here to learn and/or teach.

**********************************

472
“Allergic reaction to themselves.” They feel somehow responsible for all
the ills of the world, that they are the cause. They are having a “get rid of
the problem” reaction. It is a result of having “carried the world on their
shoulders” all their life, starting with their dysfunctional family.

They ended up with little or no ability to receive or to request or to require a

return in kind. They were told in effect that they were the source of all the
family’s problems, while they were actually the only one who was
deflecting some of the disasters.

***********************************

“Hapless, helpless, hopeless.” They feel overwhelmed and unable to handle

the requirements of life. They have in effect “thrown in the towel” on even
trying to make it in life. They have a great deal of sorrow, deep-seated grief,
and despair, and they are chronically crying on the inside. They come from
a massively dysfunctional and demoralizing family.

***************************************

“Bitterly disgusted patriarchalness.” They are manifesting a life-rejecting

creativity-, productivity-, fertility-, and responsibility-avoidance pattern,
along with a denigrating attitude towards the feminine and the sacred. It is
the result of an intensely rejecting maternal parenting pattern, with or
without an accompanying severely patriarchal family culture.

“GOITER” (Enlarged thyroid gland)

“Destiny-derailed.” They are feeling thwarted in life and prevented from

growing. They feel totally unfulfilled and non-manifesting of their
potentials and purpose. They are plagued by powerlessness feelings, and by
the conviction that they are never going to be allowed to contribute what
they came here to contribute. They are the product of a severely self-
immersed, enmeshed and undermining family.

*************************************

473
“Seething volcano.” They have a hatred arising from being victimized and
inflicted upon, as well as used and exploited, with the result that they feel
that their purposes have been prevented. They are operating out of and
intensely rageful resentment of restriction. They would dearly love to
explode all over the place, but they are terrified of doing so. It arose from an
oppressive and abusive patriarchal and dysfunctional household. (See
GRAVE’S DISEASE)

GONORRHEA

“Shame-frame.” They have a severe felt need for punishment for being a
bad person. It comes from guilt and shame about their sexuality, and from
generalized guilt and shame about themselves. It is the result of a shame-
inducing and simultaneously sex-ploitative and sexually stimulating
household.

“GOOSE BUMPS” (Body hairs standing up, raising “bumps” on the skin.
It’s a left-over from our bristling-to-intimidate when we were frightened
when we had body hair.)

“Thrills and chills.” They are having a “fight-flight” reaction to what is

going down at the moment. They feel potentially endangered in some way,
whether threatened by harm or by loss of their delightful experience or
resource. They grew up in a family in which threats of both types were
common, due to its dysfunctionality, patriarchy and/or cruelty.

**************************************

“Woo-woo” reaction. They are having an eeriness, “spookiness,” “Twilight

Zone”-type paradigm-paranoia reality challenge as things occur that are not
explainable by the usual paradigm parameters. It may involve past life
recognition or soul sore points or soul “hot spots.” The reaction often
reflects a situation in which nothing was as it seemed when they were a
child in a crazy-making and/or “un-funhouse” environment.

***************************************

474
“Déjà vu” response. They are having a strong anticipatory, remembrance
and/or implication reaction to some experience. It is often a reflection of a
repressive or suppressive family that didn’t allow them full expression of
who they were.

GOUT (Uric acid retention, resulting in swollen hands and feet and/or sharp
pains in the legs, due to uremic poisoning)

“Hopelessness-rage.” They feel trapped, with no escape from a dreary life

and outcome, and they profoundly resent it. They are manifesting
impatience, anger and temper, along with emotional imbalance. They are
holding in negative emotions and reactions that should be released.

It is a “learned helplessness” reaction to an overwhelmingly dreadful and

dreary life history, especially in their formative period. It as resulted in a
consistent pattern of being “at effect” rather than “at cause” in their
functioning. They are the product of a rejecting, neglectful and self-
immersed family.

*************************************

“My word is your command!” They are into fearful greediness and the need
to dominate. They are fixated in a negative thought patterns and attitudes,
and there is a notable lack of love in their make-up. They are intensely
judgmental, condemnatory and rejecting.

They are likely to be compulsively engaged in undisciplined eating,

drinking and rich living, resulting in self-poisoning from a “debauchment
debacle” outcome. It arises from severe “scarcity” feelings and insecurity,
which they are seeking to compensate for with greedy consumption and
compulsive control. They are the product of a highly authoritarian,
massively selfish, and hostilely controlling paranoid patriarchal family.

GRANULOCYTOPENIA (Reduced defensive white blood cells)

“Valueless.” They’re suffering from loss of self-commitment, due to a sense

of worthlessness being activated by current circumstances, which replay in
updated form the experiences of childhood. It’s an old, familiar theme or a

475
return of the repressed. In either case, it is the result of being given the
message by the way they were raised that they aren’t worth a hill of beans.

GRAVE’S DISEASE (Hyper-thyroidism)

“Shining light.” There is a felt need to perform, contribute and be creative,

and to be a source of continuous inspiration to others. So they are
compulsively communicative, excessively expressive, and frantically
manically driven. They were put on contradictory conditions for love as a
child -- to super succeed and yet to never grow away. They vacillate
between meeting this awesome criterion and retreating from it, in a
constantly agitated hyper-active performance pattern.

*************************************

“Perform -- or else!” They are desperately afraid they will lose something
or someone they love, in a frenetic abandonment-anxiety pattern. They feel
that they have to super-perform for their “love-line.” They are engaged in a
panicky effort to speed up in order to prevent the anticipated catastrophic
loss.

There are underlying profound feelings of non-deservingness of love, there

is a tremendously over-developed sense of responsibility and a co-
dependent care-taking compulsion. They are the product of a severely
conditionally loving family in which they had to constantly “earn” their
love.

*************************************

“Rejection-rage.” There is a tremendous anger at being left out, and being

made to feel that they have to constantly contribute and to suppress their
own needs. This drives them to a huge output of activity and energy, in a
frantic/manic effort to meet criteria and to deflect rejection. They were
required to be the “linchpin” for their severely dysfunctional and
rejecting/neglecting family.

GROIN PROBLEMS

476
“Sexual guilt.” They feel “wrong, bad and evil” about their gender, and
about their sexuality. It is the result of shame-inducing parenting, both
about their gender and about sexuality. (See GENITAL PROBLEMS --
FEMALE; GENITAL PROBLEMS -- MALE)

GROWTHS (Tumors)

“Injustice-nurturing.” They are nursing old hurts and shocks, and they are
building resentment and remorse arising from their formative history. There
is aggravation due to an inability to love or understand themselves or
others.

They have emotional imbalance and frustration caused by unfulfilled

unconscious desires for spiritual and personal growth. They spirituality-
rejecting and they are reductionistically materialistic in their orientation,
resulting in an inability to work with Cosmic resources.

This all produces false growths that feed on resentment. They come from an
injustice-nurturing and dysfunctionally incomprehensible family. (See the
body part(s) affected for more information)

“GULF WAR SYNDROME” (Fatigue, allergies, asthma, etc., due to

chemical, radiation and extra low frequency (ELF) exposure)

“Alone on their own.” They have an overwhelming fear of God, coupled

with a profound separation-paranoia. They have the experience that they are
all they have, in a cold, hostile and attacking world. They have no sense of
connection to the Cosmos. There was intrauterine, prenatal, and post-
partum ambivalence, and they feel that when they are under stress or
vulnerable, the world is decidedly not a safe place to be.

*************************************

“Under fire.” They are over-reacting to felt threats to their well-being, to

something that is regarded as being hostile to their welfare. There is a deep
level of fear about having to participate fully in life or about potential
annihilation. There is also an intense distrust of letting something inside

477
their boundaries. They are the product of an untrustworthy and invasive
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Frayed nerves.” They are driven by anxiety, suppressed emotions and

unresolved aggravation or irritants from childhood. They are engaged in on-
the-edge functioning, due to severe emotional difficulties, and due to
denying of their own potency and self-worth. They feel stifled and yet at the
same time that it is unsafe to take charge of their own life. They grew up in
a devastatingly dysfunctional family who totally dominated and exploited
them.

*************************************

“Thwarted leader.” They are very dependent and afraid to break away, yet
they want to control and dominate. They often are possessed by their
family, by institutions and by spouse figures. They are a potential leader and
independent thinker who is chafing at the bit under what feels like
oppressive authority-domination.

They feel held back by fools, unrecognized for their true value and talents,
and not given the high place they deserve, so they force themselves to
perform to prove themselves to the “boss.”

*************************************

“Not allowed!” They are full of ideas to get ahead, but they are afraid of
pushing on against opposition, should they fail. They are intensely inhibited
against free expression, and they are full of unresolved guilt and suppressed
grief. Their family was highly enmeshed, selfish, dysfunctional and
suppressive.

*************************************

“Generalized disgust.” They have a lot of disappointment, bitterness,

unforgivingness and over-worked resentment. They are out of step and in

478
disharmony with their environment. They feel threatened and they fear loss,
so they take a “rejecting first” approach.

There is an inability to resolve their resentment, with a resulting rejecting of

the breath of life and an emotional suffocation. There is also a deep fear of
letting go of childhood and an intense inner crying. They have a strong
ambivalence towards their mother and against mother-stand-ins.

They are being plagued by unmet dependency needs induced by a “smother

loving” yet rejecting mother who systematically undermined their capacity
for independence, identity and destiny-manifestation.

*************************************

“Abandonment-paranoia.” They are intensely sensitive, fearful and longing

for mother love or for love from someone close, and they have a rather
pronounced possessiveness and rejection-anxiety.

As a result, they are fatalistic, hostility-repressing, compulsive,

hypersensitive and lonely, with a very low self-esteem. They have a
dampened zest for life due to their stifling, engulfing and yet abandonment-
threatening mothering.

*************************************

“Wind has gone out of their sails.” They have lost their sense of purposes
and direction, along with their desire for life. They have developed a deep
fear of life, of taking responsibility, of coping with any further demands.
The illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat from confrontation and
action.

They are the product of a destiny-undermining possessive mother who

generated a sense of overwhelm and futility in them.

“GULPING AIR”

“Engulfment-deflecting.” They are in deep conflict over an issue or input

they are very afraid of and intensely resistive to taking in. They are trying to

479
assimilate it without actually doing so, and the result is delayed or mis-
timed swallowing.

They were consistently expected to take in false nutrients and nurturance as

a child in a “For your own good” family culture. They found that they had
to pretend to be receptive while secretly maintaining their internal integrity.

GUM PROBLEMS

“Grief-dominated.” They have the sense that they have no possibility of joy,
fulfillment and significance in their life. Their experience is that anything
good will be taken away, and that if they pursue happiness, they will only
end up failing in life, such as on Skid Row. They are the product of a
depriving and super-selfish dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Wishy-washy.” They have a lot of internal conflict and learned

helplessness, leading to an inability to back up and follow through on their
decisions. They display little potency or confidence, and they have no sense
of security.

There is instead a pronounced sense of vulnerability and weakness, along

with considerable grief over the insufficient nurturance, grounding, and
teaching they received when they were growing up.

RIGHT GUMS

“At risk.” They have issues around trust of the world, a lack of a sense of
safety, and feelings of not being able to make it.

LEFT GUMS

“Self-distrust.” They are suffering from concerns about their sanity, and a
feeling that they don’t know how to want well.

UPPER GUMS

480
“Lack of grounding.” They have the feeling that they have nothing to stand
to rely on in life.

LOWER GUMS

“Powerlessness.” Their experience is that they don’t have what it takes to

make things happen.

GINGIVITIS (Inflammation of the gums)

“Singled out for shit.” They feel that they are being systematically
discriminated against and persecuted, particularly by the “powers that be.”
They feel vulnerable and powerless in an overwhelming world. It arises
from not having been launched with proper support, teaching and guidance
as a child.

PERIODONTIS (Disease of the gums)

“Wimp-wilt.” They are plagued by anger at their inability to make

decisions, as they live out a wishy-washy “gutless wonder” lifestyle. They
are the product of a systematically confidence-and competence-
undermining and power-punishing “keep them around the old homestead”
possessive parenting pattern.

SWOLLEN GUMS

“Deprivation-grief.” There is a deep-seated grief over insufficient

nurturance and sustenance currently and/or in their formative family.

PALE, WHITISH GUMS

“Running on empty.” They are strung out, deprived, and running out of life
energy. There is an unequal energy exchange with the environment in which
they put out much more than they get back. They are experiencing
insufficient love and life support, leading to anemia, in a pattern that started
early in life.

DEEP RED OR PURPLE GUMS

481
“Boundary-protecting.” They are intensely rageful and attacking over felt
violations of their beingness. The family was very intrusive and
unconcerned with their needs, and they learned to be fiercely self-protective
in a deeply resentful manner.

RECEDING GUMS

“Injustice-resenting.” They are experiencing frustration and anger over how

their life is going. There is a felt unfairness and discrimination/deprivation
feelings. This is an old, familiar story, dating back to the very beginning,
when indeed there was a great deal of “singled out for shit” behavior and
events going down.

BLEEDING GUMS

“Grit and bear it.” There is intense anger over their situation, a sense of
having to put up with totally unjustified conditions. There is also an
accompanying feeling that they are doing the wrong thing, that they are
taking the incorrect action in their situation. It is a “There is no joy in
Bloodville” experience of a lack of happiness in the decisions of life, and in
their decision in life.

They are grimily getting through the night, joylessly making necessary
decisions that they have little faith in. They feel alone in an indifferent
world. They feel that things just go from bad to worse, and that they have to
make all kinds of unpleasant decisions. It is very reminiscent of their
childhood, when they simply had to make the best of one bad situation after
another that they were often blamed for.

PIMPLES ON THE GUMS

“Picked on.” They feel singled out for unfair treatment and selective
deprivation. They are likely to have authority problems. This is because
their parents were basically rather childish and selfish.

GUNSHOT WOUND

482
“Violence victim.” All their life, they have somehow always been the
recipient of emotional, social and even physical violation. They seem to
operate like a magnet for such events. They tend to have a strong
underlying conviction that they somehow deserve it.

It is the result of simultaneous accusatory and exploitative parenting arising

from their being perceived as the cause and hope of everything at a level far
beyond their capabilities. It happened as a function of being more than the
family average in their personal power and resources.

*************************************

“As a person thinketh, so they become.” They are rather intensely impact-
seeking -- to a degree that they are effectively intrusive, invasive and
insensitive. They therefore get into situations where there are similar
activities and forces directed their way. It is the result of intense
aggressiveness training in childhood.

SHOT TO DEATH

“Gun-done in.” They had an abiding sense of moral and/or Cosmic

accountability/responsibility for the evils in their life and/or in the world
that ended up resulting in their attracting the ultimate “atonement.” Their
family blamed them for everything that went wrong, often in an ironic
reaction to their “better than the average bear’s” resources, leading to
expectations for them to “make it all better.”

******************************

“They who live by the…” Their lifestyle has finally resulted in the
inevitable outcome. It got started in a highly immature family who were
severely dysfunctional, intensely self-immersed, paranoically protective of
their own interests, and frequently violent.

******************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the

483
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

Section 7

484
G

485
242

486
G

487
243

244

245

246

247

248

249

250

488
251

252

253

489
HAIR-LOSS

“Shut down.” It is a clamping down on their passion and/or personal

potency, lest they activate abandonment or annihilation from their
environment. They don’t feel free to be themselves. It reflects an underlying
sense of non-deservingness of acceptance and/or a fear of becoming too
noticeable in the environment. It arises when they start to manifest their true
essence and destiny.

It is the result of being thoroughly trained to experience themselves as

“unfit for human consumption” and/or as being “bad, wrong and evil” for
having personal power and clout. Their family was intensely conditionally
accepting out of a highly possessive and/or out of an alarmed reaction to
their potency, potentials and passion-arousal.

HAIR-PULLING; PULLING HAIR OUT

“Punitive self-stroking.” It is a simultaneous self-soothing, self-rejection

and self-hate-expression. It is powerlessness-and helplessness-anxiety-
relief-seeking via self-harming self-stimulation. It’s a “Nobody’s there for
me” maternal deprivation hopelessness stress reaction to circumstances that
reactivate the feeling of abandonment during infancy.

It is also an appeasement appeal atonement-attempt self-attack as they try to

elicit at least some support from the rejecting mother in their head, who is
experienced as the local representative of the “Home Office,” (All that Is)
and who must be appeased at all costs. It is, needless to say, a reaction to
intense maternal deprivation, denigration and/or rejection.

HAIR TANGLES; HAIR-SNARLING (Frequently or chronically)

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are conflicted and alarmed by the prospect of

their releasing their personal potency and/or passion, which seems to be
either in the works or already happening. It arises from a strongly
suppressive family culture which instilled a deep-seated fear of their inner
characteristics, motivations and resources.

490
HAND PROBLEMS

“Exploitation-resentment.” They have feelings of not getting a fair

exchange in life, and they are afraid of not having opportunities for their
own goals, undertakings and purposes. They feel pressured and
manipulated, and they refuse to continue in the “serve-aholic” capacity that
they were forced to assume in their family.

************************************

“Immobilization.” They are having conflicts over how they are handling
life. There are issues around holding and dealing with things, around their
ability to act. They have guilt over decisions and outcomes of their actions.
They are handicapped by competence-anxiety and fear of doing. They are
engaged in success-and failure-avoidance by “sitting on their hands.” This
came about because of systematic competence-and confidence-undermining
by a possessive family.

************************************

“I wouldn’t dare!” They are encountering difficulties in reaching out for

goals. They have issues about manifesting their creativity, productivity or
expressiveness, as a function of having had to deal with a situation where
any intervention on their part set off World War II when they were a child.

************************************

“Take it away!” They are having difficulty in grasping new ideas, due to
implication-avoidance and fear of the future. They have hassles in handling
novel experiences and events. They are deeply immersed in fear of life, and
they are retreating into themselves.

They are significantly hampered in their comprehension of things, which

results in considerable free-floating anxiety. It is the result of an intensely
fear-inducing family.

************************************

491
“It’s not allowed!” They have deep conflicts about receiving, accepting and
taking. They are dominated by guilt and shame, leading to the conviction
that they don’t deserve anything positive. It arose from a severely
denigrating and accusative family.

************************************

“Relationship-deflecting.” They are involved in vulnerability-and

involvement-avoidance. They have a deep fear of sharing themselves, of
exposing who they are, and of allowing intimacy to develop -- they won’t
caress. There is an underlying dread of being damaged by closeness and
contact that comes from growing up in an untrustworthy and/or distant
family.

************************************

“Rearview clutching.” They have difficulty letting go of things and in

leaving the past behind. They are intensely conservative and inflexible, and
they are manifesting a “grasping and gripping” approach to life. They come
from a similar family culture.

************************************

“Aggressive selfishness.” They are prone to “pinch-attack,” to strike out, to

grab, and to push things and people away. They are quite severely self-
immersed, willful, and environmentally impositioning and attacking. They
grew up in an authoritarian, position-pushing, super-self-immersed family.

RIGHT HAND PROBLEMS

“Fraud feelings.” They feel unintelligent, and like they don’t know what
they are doing. They have the fear that they don’t have the wherewithal to
carry out the implementation of their intended manifestation. They aren’t
sure how to make things happen on the one hand, and how to manage the
down side of their power motivation -- which is anger -- on the other.

*******************************

492
“Selfish withholding.” They have difficulty being able to give, to contribute,
and/or to serve. They come from a ferociously competitive and self-
immersed family system.

LEFT HAND PROBLEMS

“Powerlessness.” They have feelings of not being in control of their life, of

needing external support to survive. There is also self-distrust and
considerable uncertainty about their motivations and the worthiness of their
intentions.

*******************************

“Hands on control.” They have problems with letting things flow, with
being receptive and receiving, with being passive as they allow things to
develop. They are the product of a patriarchal, perhaps authoritarian family.

*******************************

“Sinister-feeling.” There is conflict and/or guilt about being “left-handed in

a right-handed society” generated by much wrong-making from their family
and others.

PREFERRED HAND PROBLEMS

“How should I make it happen?” They have conflicts about how they
operate in the world at the event-and outcome-eliciting level. They are
caught up in concerns about their conscious strategies and tactics.

NON-PREFERRED HAND PROBLEMS

“Self-questioning.” They have issues with their internal motivations, what

they will choose to elicit and generate in their life. The concern is about
their subconscious intentions, and about their inner other-gender
characteristics (their anima or their animus).

AMBIDEXTROUSNESS PROBLEMS

493
“Gender identity problems.” They have issues about being “ambidextrous”
-- about their being equally capable of utilizing masculine and feminine
strategies. This has led to great discombobulation from other people all
their life, and it has therefore become a major concern for them. It has
generated considerable uncertainty about who and what they are, along with
strong emotional reactions to both this uncertainty and its manifestations.

**********************************

“Which way to go?” There are ambivalent motivations or conflicts between

their conscious and subconscious, or between their public impacts and their
personal outcomes. They are also capable of being even-handedly neutral in
their dealings with the world around them. This “all options open”
characteristic generated a lot of anxiety, agitation and attack when they
were growing up.

HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Sealed unit.” They have a rather pronounced propensity to withdrawal into

their inner core and to non-involvement with the world around them. They
fear that negative, perhaps even disastrous results will occur if they become
involved and vulnerable. They are the product of an untrustworthy,
undermining and/or severely dysfunctional family.

FIRST (THUMB) HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Calamity-avoidance.” They are hampered by self-distrust and by resistance

to taking on responsibilities, out of a fear of failure or even of disaster. They
feel “in over their head.”

RIGHT FIRST HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Competence-anxiety.” They are very concerned that they will “blow it” if
they try to take things on.

LEFT FIRST HAND BONE PROBLEMS

494
“Self-fear.” They have a deep distrust of their own motivational system that
makes them very reluctant to take the chance of self-and other-sabotage.

SECOND (INDEX) HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“No way, Jose!” They fear new ideas, alternative directions in life, and the
future. They are alarmed that they going to make serious mistakes.

RIGHT SECOND HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Hunker down in the bunker.” They are quite conservative and constricted
in their approach.

LEFT SECOND HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Good old ways.” They have a great deal of self-uncertainty that causes
them to stick to the tried and true.

THIRD (MIDDLE) HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Disaster-avoidance.” They have considerable anxiety about vulnerability,

creativity, sexuality and potency-manifestation. They don’t want to “set off
World War III.”

RIGHT THIRD HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Pulled in.” They are quite resistive to taking on situations and positions
that require that they become emotionally involved and vulnerable in a
manner that calls for their calling upon their inner resources.

LEFT THIRD HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxious.” They are rather intensely self-distrusting, particularly

with regard to their creativity, sexuality and personal potency manifestation.

FOURTH (RING) HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Relationship-deflecting.” They are engaged in systematic involvement

avoidance and intimacy-fearing disengagement and unavailability.

495
RIGHT FOURTH HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Intimacy-avoidant.” They are highly inclined to avoid vulnerable

involvement and intimate connections.

LEFT FOURTH HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Pandora-avoidance.” They are quite afraid of what would happen from and
to them if they became involved in intimacy.

FIFTH (LITTLE FINGER) BONE PROBLEMS

“Rejection-avoidance.” They are heavily into connection-preventing and

social distantiation.

RIGHT FIFTH HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Reject first.” They have a tendency to “vote with their feet” by walking in
the other direction away from people.

LEFT FIFTH HAND BONE PROBLEMS

“Rejection-paranoid.” They are rather severely afraid of “putting

themselves on the block” with other people. (See the individual bone
segments in the FINGER PROBLEMS section)

PALM AREA PROBLEMS

“Pragmatics-anxiety.” They are experiencing conflicts around vulnerability,

feelings and relationships, along with practical management issues. They
feel inadequate to the cause of handling life’s demands on the day-to-day
level. This usually is the result of engulfing and possessive parenting.

RIGHT HAND PALM AREA PROBLEMS

“In over their head.” They feel overwhelmed by life’s demands -- they feel
that they don’t have what it takes to rise to the challenge.

LEFT HAND PALM AREA PROBLEMS

496
“Emotional overwhelm.” They feel inundated with feelings, vulnerabilities,
and the requirements of relationships, and they are flooded with too much
emotional material to handle effectively.

BALL OF THE PALM (THUMB BASE) PROBLEMS

“Bring back the good old days!” They are having quite a reaction to new
influences or requirements. They are angry and full of resentment of what
they now have to do.

They come from a closed heart, and they are distrusting and unwilling to
cooperate. They have lost their groundedness in love. It is the result of
untrustworthy parenting.

RIGHT HAND BALL OF PALM PROBLEMS

“Change-flummox.” They are at a loss as to what to do to handle new

influences and requirements.

LEFT HAND BALL OF PALM PROBLEMS

“Rigid refusal.” They are having a strong disgust and distrust response to
their having to deal with the new influences and requirements in their life.

BALL BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER AREA PROBLEMS

“Seat of the emotions issues.” They have difficulties ascertaining the

meanings, significances, implications and ramifications of things, and the
resulting lack of framework leads to emotional-commotional reactions and
to confused or distorted feelings about things.

They grew up in a confusingly, chaotic, significance-squashing denial-

dominated dysfunctional family who avoided reality like the plague. They
learned distorted takes on things as a result.

RIGHT HAND BALL BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER AREA

PROBLEMS

497
“What do I do now!?” They are highly uncertain what strategies, tactics and
actions to take in many situations.

LEFT HAND BALL BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER AREA PROBLEMS

“What’s going on!?” They are rather discombobulated and in the dark about
what is happening around and within them a lot of the time.

BELOW THE INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Change-avoidant.” They are alarmed when life requires that they change
who they are and how they do things. It comes from growing up in a rigidly
conservative family.

UPPER AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“I’ll be hurt!” They are very protective of their emotional self.

RIGHT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Tried and true.” They do not want to alter how they go about doing things
out of fear of how they would be emotionally hurt if they did so.

LEFT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE INDEX INGER PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are afraid of “letting the demon out” for fear of what
might happen to them emotionally if they “let fly with themselves.”

MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Careening cannon interpretations.” They are deeply afraid they might

grossly misrepresent things.

RIGHT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Misunderstanding the world.” They have the experience that they tend to
reality-reinterpret.

498
LEFT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER
PROBLEMS

“Delusional self-perceptions.” They keep going off about what things mean
about them.

BASE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Off-the-wall feelings.” They are afraid that their feelings about things are
coming from left field.

RIGHT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Out of control.” They have the fear that their emotional reactions to things
are going to run roughshod over the environment.

LEFT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE INDEX FINGER PROBLEMS

“Stranger reactions.” They have the experience that their emotional

responses to things are not what one would expect, and hence they are
concerned about who they really are.

BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Emotionally harm-avoidant.” They are anxious about what would happen

to them if they become emotionally involved in anything. Their family was
untrustworthy with regard to how things impacted upon them emotionally.

UPPER AREA BELOW MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Lying low.” They are most afraid of putting themselves in a position where
they become emotionally available.

RIGHT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“I’ll screw up!” They have the feeling that if they enter into emotional
contact, they will do things that cause emotional harm to others.

499
LEFT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER
PROBLEMS

“I’ll be destroyed!” They fear that to engage emotionally will cause them
great harm.

MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“I’ll get it all wrong.” They are afraid that they will not truly understand
what’s happening when they are emotionally involved.

RIGHT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“I’ll mis-read them.” They are afraid they won’t correctly interpret what is
going on with the other person if they are emotionally involved.

LEFT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“I don’t understand myself.” They have the feeling that when they get
emotionally involved, they don’t really know themselves well enough to
understand where they are coming from.

BASE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Luminosity-alarm.” They have quite a bit of distrust of the other realms,

the collective consciousness and the Cosmos regarding how they will affect
their emotional functioning.

RIGHT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“They’ll blow me away!” They are basically afraid of being overwhelmed

by larger reality forces.

LEFT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE MIDDLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

500
“I’ll mis-use it!” They are afraid of themselves with regard to how they
would relate to the larger realities.

BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Relationship-paranoia.” They are rather deeply unnerved by the whole

arena of relationships. Their family relationships where highly
untrustworthy.

UPPER AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“S/he will hurt me!” Their experience has been that when they enter
relationships, they end up emotionally damaged.

RIGHT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Our process will blow up.” Their experience is that the way the other
person and they relate to each other will harm them emotionally.

LEFT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“I will blow it up.” They are sure that if they go into a relationship, they
will surely derail the whole thing.

MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Crazy-making.” They are sure that if they enter a relationship, it will result
in escalating disaster misunderstandings.

RIGHT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER

PROBLEMS

“They’ll misinterpret me.” Their feeling is that the other person in the
relationship will not understand them.

LEFT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER

PROBLEMS

501
“I’ll go off the wall.” Their fear is that they will go off on all kinds of
tangents about the relationship.

BASE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Emotional-commotional.” They are deeply afraid that if they become

vulnerably emotionally involved in a relationship, it will set off an
escalating spiral of emotional explosiveness and chaos. It will require some
therapeutic work regarding this area of their life.

RIGHT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Relationship-devastation.” They are sure that their emotional over-

reactivity would ruin any relationship they got involved in.

LEFT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE RING FINGER PROBLEMS

“Relationship-devastated.” They have the conviction that if they became

engaged in a relationship it would be the end of them emotionally.

BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Post-traumatic stress reactions.” They are experiencing the effects of

traumas and problems in their early life history.

UPPER AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Damaged goods.” They are encountering the emotional behavioral effects

of the difficulties they ran into in their formative process.

RIGHT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Fouled-up functioning.” They are finding that their ability to manage the
pragmatics of life is being disrupted.

LEFT HAND UPPER AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

502
“Emotionally mis-wired.” They are having difficulties with their emotional
reactions to things.

MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Mis-reading.” There are problems arising from the individual’s

interpretations of things.

RIGHT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Off base.” They are tending to be over-concretistic, literalistic or

pragmatically off the wall in their take on things.

*******************************

“Unique takes.” They are prone to idiosyncratic, eccentric or even bizarre

interpretations of things.

LEFT HAND MIDDLE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Inappropriate self-referencing.” They become all caught up in egocentric

mis-reading of things.

BASE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

“Other realm influences.” They are having issues involving archetypes and
numinous forces that are causing difficulty.

RIGHT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER

PROBLEMS

“Cosmic intrusions.” They are encountering invasions of their pragmatic

functioning by spiritual, collective consciousness, other realm and Cosmic
forces.

LEFT HAND BASE AREA BELOW THE LITTLE FINGER PROBLEMS

503
“Other realms-alarm.” They are conflicted, frightened by or prone to be
taken over in their inner life by spiritual, collective consciousness, other
realm of Cosmic forces.

SIDE OF THE HAND PROBLEMS (Bottom of the fist)

“Self-questioning.” They are experiencing conflicts over their person

potency and about their values and priorities. There are intrusions of
subconscious material that has not been processed. It arises from guilt-
inducing, competence-anxiety generating, and/or doubt-raising concerning
their motivations from their family. These kinds of problems arise when the
family utilizes a lot of repression, suppression and oppression.

SIDE OF RIGHT HAND PROBLEMS

“Careening cannon fears.” They have issues concerning the right use of
power, or whether they are being effective in their priority-setting. Their
operational functioning is being disrupted by the intrusion of subconscious
materials.

SIDE OF LEFT HAND PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They have serious doubts and questions about their

motivations and intentions, as they set their priorities and take their stands.
They are being deeply disturbed by the emergence of material into their
consciousness that they long ago repressed.

SIDE OF THUMB BASE PROBLEMS

“Freaked out.” They are overwhelmed by the requirements of life,

particularly with regard to new possibilities. They are afraid that they will
blow it or that it will blow them away. It arises from having been the in
effect overwhelmed pivotal person in their severely dysfunctional family as
a child.

RIGHT HAND SIDE OF THUMB BASE PROBLEMS

504
“Competence-anxiety.” They are scared to death that they don’t have what
it takes to make what has to happen manifest.

LEFT HAND SIDE OF THUMB BASE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are unsure of their motivations and reactions to the

requirements of their life, especially new ones, and they are afraid that they
might subconsciously sabotage things.

BACK OF THE HAND PROBLEMS

“Shit-deserving.” They are experiencing difficulties in receiving and/or

accepting or relating to that which comes to them from the Universe. They
are either not willing to receive or they experience what happens to them as
rejections, attacks or “proofs” of their “deserving the very worst.” It derives
from a highly blame-throwing, depriving and degrading childhood.

BACK OF THE RIGHT HAND PROBLEMS

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have expectations of negative events at

the hands of the environment -- fearful anticipation regarding what the
world is going to do to them.

BACK OF THE LEFT HAND PROBLEMS

“I have met the enemy -- and it is ME!” There is intense self-distrust and
anticipations of self-generated disasters arising from their functioning.

ARTHRITIC HANDS

“Hands-on domination/determination.” They are intensely inflexible, rigid

and feeling-avoidant, in a repressive and controlling manner. They fear
things getting out of hand, running amok, or having others determine what
will happen. They are the product of a domineering, autocratic and
patriarchal household.

ARTHRITIC RIGHT HAND

505
“Grimly determined octopus.” They are totally out to personally hands-on
control everything that happens around them. They were the “sane one” in a
severely dysfunctional and authoritarian family.

ARTHRITIC LEFT HAND

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have deep alarm about what would happen if
they released their rigid self-control. They are the product of an enragingly
dysfunctional family in which it was made quite clear that all hell would
break loose if they expressed themselves or if they tried to correct anything.

COLD HANDS, CHRONIC

“Backed off.” They are systematically disengaging themselves from the

world around them. They find that being involved and vulnerable leads to
too many untoward consequences. They are the product of a severely
dysfunctional, non-supportive and perhaps untrustworthy family, from
whom they originally backed off.

RIGHT HAND CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Involvement-avoidance.” They are avoiding contact with the world for

fear of what it would do to them.

LEFT HAND CHRONIC COLDNESS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have a deep fear of their own hostile impulses
and what they would do to the world.

COLD HANDS, TEMPORARY

“Recoiling.” They are self-protectively pulling back from availability to and

involvement in the world around them.

RIGHT HAND COLDNESS

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are avoiding contact with the world for fear of
what the world would do to them.

506
LEFT HAND COLDNESS

“Self-distrust.” They have a real fear of their angry impulses -- “run amok-
anxiety.”

ELEVATED VEINS ON THE BACK OF THE HANDS

“Stress signals.” They are having coping capability concerns, and they are
experiencing issues regarding their ability to handle the requirements of
life. It is indicative of internal conflict and stress concerning their
relationship to doing, reaching out, manifesting, receiving, and
experiencing life -- all of which were systematically undermined in their
dysfunctional possessive/enmeshed family.

RIGHT HAND ELEVATED VEINS

“How should I do it?” They have internal conflict over the methods and
means of implementation of their intentions.

LEFT HAND ELEVATED VEINS

“What am I up to?” There is internal conflict over their motivations,

intentions and expressions.

“GANGLION” IN THE HAND (A knot-like growth in the palm)

“How can I help you?” They are a “serve-aholic” trying to “atone” for a
sense of “evilness,” arising from an exploitative, accusatory and abusive
family. It may or may not have resulted in ragefulness and a subtle and
subconscious desire for revenge. Whether there is resentment-rage or not,
there is a compulsive contribution pattern -- at their own expense.

In the case of the rageful revenge orientation situation, this results in a

vicious spiral of things getting worse and worse as they seek to atone for
the rage, as well as for the attributed “evilness.”

********************************

507
“Peter Pan/ella.” Life is one long series of unwelcome demands, unpleasant
impositions and joyless experiences to them. They feel that they are being
required to take on too much. Their mother firmly put them on notice that
any form of self-development, independence or self-empowerment was
tantamount to suicide via abandonment-annihilation. So they intensely
avoid growing up.

RIGHT HAND “GANGLION”

“Power-avoidance.” It is a rejection of their means of manifesting personal

potency and fulfillment.

**************************

“Me last!” They have a felt sense of “wrongness” about themselves, with a
resulting need for “serve-aholic” compulsive contribution. It arises from
experienced harms and harmfulness generated by the way they do things.

LEFT HAND “GANGLION”

“Withdrawal within.” They are shutting down their desires and motivations
to manifest themselves in the world.

***************************

“Motive-questioning.” They have a deep concern about their underlying

intentions, brought about by both the messaging they received as a child
and by their subconscious resentment-rage. (See the location on the hand(s)
for more information)

HAND CRAMPS

“Communication concerns.” They have anxiety and conflicts over their

ability and the expression of it. They also feel handicapped in the
competence in verbal communication. They were hovered over and
monitored intensely on everything they did or said as a child by
perfectionistic parents.

RIGHT HAND CRAMPS

508
“Cincinnati Inquirer.” They feel like they are the only one that sees what is
happening -- and everyone else is reading the paper as they try to tell them.
(The “Cincinnati Inquirer” used to run cartoons about various situations of
this sort.)

LEFT HAND CRAMPS

“Can’t share.” They have the experience that they are simply unable to get
across what is happening for, within and around them.

SWEATY HANDS

“Freaked out.” They are experiencing a good deal of anxiety and

nervousness about what they are doing, at present or in life as a whole.
They have an emotional overflow regarding their activities and
involvements. They are deathly afraid of making mistakes and of seeming
incapable, foolish or evil.

It is an old, familiar pattern with them, as they were frequently made wrong
and denigrated when they undertook projects and commitments as a child.

“HANGOVER”

“I have sinned!” They feel guilt and shame over self-indulgence, and/or
over-assumed or accused acting out. They are the product of a significantly
dysfunctional family who nevertheless generated a great deal of shame and
guilt for engaging in what they themselves were doing, in a “Don’t do as I
do, do as I say!” culture. It was made perfectly clear to them that they do
not deserve to have fun, much less to engage in acting out episodes, in a
“God has spoken!” manner.

“HANTA-VIRUS” (Quickly precipitated lethal respiratory failure)

[Transmitted by fleas]

“Throwing in the towel.” They feel highly unsafe in the world, and they
fear taking in life as a result. They feel unworthy of living fully, and they
are alone, sad and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance. They are
joy-avoidant and happiness-squashing, out of a fear of the Universe. They

509
can’t let people in or themselves out. This has cut them off from joy and
love, and it is now taking its toll.

They are having an “Enough is enough!” reaction, and they are heading on
out. They are desperately tired of life, due to life-long suppressed grief.
They are fearful, anxious and too devastated to take it any more. It came
about from effective emotional abandonment at a very early age, to which
they reacted with becoming a self-made person with a “portable Plexiglas
phone booth” around them.

HARDENING OF THE ARTERIES

“Island unto themselves.” They are hyper-self-responsible, and they feel

that they can’t count on anyone or anything. Their deep experience is that
they have to do it all themselves. They are perfectionistically disappointed
in themselves, and they won’t accept help or delegate responsibility. They
were left to their own devices from very early on in their effectively
neglectful family.

************************************

“Intimacy-rejecting.” They are spirituality-denigrating and love-

suppressing, and at base they are shy, with a poor sex adjustment. Their
love nature is uninvolved and reserved for only a few. They won’t allow
themselves to feel love, affection or compassion for many people, and they
operate with highly conditional love habits. They come from an unloving
and ferociously self-immersed family.

*************************************

“Here it comes!” They are dealing with a feeling of being threatened in

some vague but very important and high stakes manner, with a resulting
intense sense of endangerment. They feel ready for virtually anything to
happen. Their family was notorious for their off-the-wall calamity-
production arising out of their severe dysfunctionality.

*************************************

510
“Thwarted.” They feel prevented and blocked in their life, and that they
aren’t being allowed to manifest themselves. It is the result of a long-
standing emotional problem that hasn’t been worked out, a deep resentment
over the past that is eating at them. They are the product of a feeling-
avoidant dysfunctional and patriarchal family.

*************************************

“Seething volcano.” They are prone to “make mountains out of molehills”

in an intensely rageful manner. They are impatient, angry and wanting to
live life in the moment, and they are prone to try to pound away too quickly
at life.

There is a great deal of suppressed rage and hostility over the felt external
control of their life. As a result, there is a resistance to their emotional
energies and a “hardening of the attitudes,” with a hard-nosed and
authoritarian approach. They are an aggressive dominator who has a deep
need to be in control. It all arises from an underlying passive dependency
and a fear of domination that came from an authoritarian household.

*************************************

“Perfectionistic performance.” They have a profoundly frightening dread of

failure produced by their parent(s) making them into an “ego extension”
vicarious accomplisher for them. They are tremendously parent-admiring,
especially of their father. They are an achieve-aholic hard-driving
competitor for paternal validation. They are a workaholic number-addict
and “coup-seeker” who wants to “make a killing.” They could never
measure up, in their father’s eyes.

*************************************

“Feeling-suppressing.” There is stress and conflict, shocks and tension in

their situation, and they are afraid of being “over-the-top” disappointed
again. They are afraid of their anger and they can’t handle it, so they stuff it.

They suppress their negative emotions with their intimates, for fear of
hurting their loved ones, and they are over-compliant and anger-avoidant to

511
mask their intense feelings of hostility. Their family made it very clear to
them that they were to be seen and not heard.

*************************************

“On the go.” They are anxious about money, time-urgent, insecure about
life and stress-sensitive, all of which arises from their having had to take on
their parent(s) ambitions for them from far too early an age.

They have never had a childhood, and were never given the message that
who they are is enough or that what they accomplished filled the bill. They
are deeply resentful about that. (See ARTERY PROBLEMS)

HAY FEVER

“Woe is me.” They are suffering from emotional congestion -- they are
hung up in the hurts of the past, in the form of chronic grief. They believe
that time is passing them by, and that things are only going to get worse.
They feel unsafe and unloved, yet they don’t feel they have the right to
release their grief and sorrow, so they repress it and they suppress their
tears. This all arose out of a shame-inducing and punitive family.

*************************************

“Resentment-rage.” They are plagued with the effects of their repressed

anger and desires for aggression. They want revenge for all the pain they
have experienced, but they deeply fear the implications and ramifications
should they ever act on this.

They come from a virulently but subtly invasive and abusive family in
which to do or say anything about what was happening would have led to
disastrous results.

*************************************

“Persecution trip.” They are convinced that the world is out to get them and
to torture them. Their experience is that things are forever working against

512
them in a malevolent manner. They are the product of an essentially slyly
sadistic family who really did subtly persecute them.

*************************************

“Guilt-grabbing.” They feel responsible for everything that goes wrong, that
has gone wrong, or that will go wrong. Their experience is that “I caused
World War II,” and their fear is that they will cause World War III. Their
family was intensely accusatory, accountability-attributing and blame-
throwing.

*************************************

“Season-fearing.” They are enslaved to the calendar, in the sense that they
so expect the congestion that they precipitate it right on schedule. Their
family was full of such expectations, attributions, interpretations and
elicitations.

HEADACHES

“Feeling overwhelmed.” They are under a lot of stress, and they are feeling
quite tense about it. Their fear and anxiety are alarming them to the point of
threatening to upset their whole apple cart. They are having strong
experiences of internal pressures rising to the point of getting out of control.
There is an intense need for them to be able to get on top of their situation
so they can problem-solve and issue-resolve.

This is an old, familiar feeling for them, because they were the “pivot
person” in their dysfunctional family, the only “sane one” in a potentially
catastrophically ineffectual family.

*************************************

“Stop the world!” They are blocking the flow of life and of their process as
a distraction or escape operation. They are trying not to experience what is
happening at this time, and they are being unable to deal with or face the
issues that are causing distress right now. It is reflective of a deep distrust of
the Universe generated by untrustworthy mothering.

513
 *************************************

“Trying too hard.” They are “going for the brass ring” all the time, and it is
creating stress and tension. They are something of an achieve-aholic, and
they are always seeking to get ahead. They had to “perform for their
breakfast” as a child.

*************************************

“Hot hurts.” They are into resentment-ruminations and angry thoughts

about why they are angry, while not doing anything about it. They have
anxiety about things that aren’t handled -- including their anger. They have
a strong habit of generating such situations and of negativity and
resentment.

Some circumstance, relationship, situation, issue, pressure, individual or

whatever that they dislike intensely but which they feel they have to put up
with, to live with, is really bugging them.

It comes from having been in a dysfunctional family in which much that

was frustrating and insoluble occurred.

**********************************

“Screwed-up feelings.” They are highly prone to self-invalidation and self-

criticism. They are a perfectionist who is feeling frustration at missing their
mark. They are full of self-disapproval and self-disgust. They may desire to
be the “head” of a home or business situation.

It comes about as a function of having had to be an “associate parent” when

they were a child in a dysfunctional and perfectionistic family.

**********************************

“Dumbo-head.” They are being hampered by competence-anxiety, self-

doubt and feeling stupid -- by cope-ability-anxiety. There is much worry,
anxiety and tension, bringing congestion in the head. They are manifesting
confusion and mental knots that have to be untied. There is suppressed

514
emotion or extreme excitement over something -- or over nothing. They are
full of hurt feelings, emotional upsets, and uncertainty as to what is
happening.

It is the result of a “magical mystery tour” dysfunctional family

environment.

**********************************

“Does not compute!” They are trying to integrate incompatible-seeming

ideas and information. They have a lot of implication-anxiety about what
would happen if they don’t succeed in coming up with a meta-interpretation
that pulls it all together in a cohesive context. It is the result of having been
the reality-interpreter for their rather chaotic meaning-challenged family.

**********************************

“Sitting on it.” They are suppressing negative feelings and thoughts for fear
that they are inappropriate or unacceptable, or because they are afraid of
voicing them. They are avoiding expressing or acting on their pain and hurt
feelings. They tend to get locked inside with nowhere to go, and it hurts.
Their family was highly repressive.

**********************************

“Relationship problems.” They are feeling trapped in unpleasant and

inescapable issues and processes in one or more of their relationships at the
present time. It is causing them a great deal of alarm and distress, but they
don’t see any effective ways to deal with the problems.

It is an all-too-familiar experience for them, as they are tending to attract

and elicit the kinds of phenomena, processes and people that they grew up
with, in an attempt to “put a new ending on the old story.”

**********************************

“Joy-avoidance.” They are systematically somber and serious to the point of

not allowing themselves to experience or express the up and sillier side of

515
life and themselves. They have a need to enjoy life more -- to laugh, to
praise people, to express their gratitude, to sing and dance, and to just plain
have a good time. They are the product of a “nose to the grindstone” work
ethic family.

RIGHT SIDE HEADACHES

“Gestalt-fearing.” They are experiencing conflicts over their perceptions,

intuitions and overview comprehensions of things. These were not
acceptable to their family.

LEFT SIDE HEADACHES

“Don’t know!” There are issues regarding their interpretations,

conceptualizations and cognitive understandings of what’s happening. Their
family “didn’t want to know.”

BACK OF THE HEAD HEADACHES

“Don’t see!” They have issues about implications and images that they are
experiencing. They weren’t supposed to see what was going down when
they were a child.

FOREHEAD HEADACHES

“Walking cerebrum.” They are given to hyper-rationality, leading to muscle

contractions. They think too much, in a feeling-suppressing manner,
resulting in a chronic anger reaction. They have a need to “blow their top.”
They weren’t allowed to experience or express feelings in their home. (See
FOREHEAD PROBLEMS)

SINUS HEADACHES

“Suppressed mourning.” They are suffering from suppressed grief over

abandonment-anxiety and frustration with their intimates about insufficient
support and love.

It is an issue dating back to childhood, when their family kept them on

highly contingent and conditional acceptance. (See SINUS PROBLEMS)

516
TEMPLE HEADACHES

“Understanding-avoidance.” They are caught up in obsessional thinking, or

they are suppressing thinking about something. It is the result of a “Don’t
know!” injunction from their family. (See “CLUSTER HEADACHES;”
HEADACHES -- COLDNESS-PRODUCED)

HEADACHES -- COLDNESS-PRODUCED (e.g. cold air, cold drink

intake, etc.)

“Suppressed mourning.” They are experiencing suppressed grief over

abandonment-anxiety and frustration with their intimates about insufficient
support and love, an issue dating back to childhood.

In effect, they are a self-made person who tends very strongly to believe
that there is no one out there for them, and even that “God might be Al
Capone.” They are a “sealed unit” -- “island unto themselves” -- “urban
hermit.” It is the result of pervasive and persistent lack of support
throughout their infancy and childhood.

HEADACHES -- MIGRAINE (See MIGRAINE HEADACHE)

“HEAD COLD”

“Now or never!” They have to pay attention to that which they have not
allowed to come to the conscious level for some time which has surfaced to
be confronted now. It is some information they need to know, that they need
to acknowledge, that they need to tell themselves. It’s been in their
subconscious and held down for quite a while, and now it’s pushing for
recognition.

It utilizes as its precipitating mechanism a misinterpretation or an emotional

upset with the people who are close to them.

*************************************

“Take it on!” They need to take time out to handle the emotional and mental
issues that are bothering them. The effect is a feeling that too much is going

517
on at once, and that there is mental conflict that is causing confusion and
disorder in their life.

It represents a form of existential and destiny-avoidance in a pattern of not

setting a stable pattern in their life, not taking the long view, and not seeing
how their life is going and what’s not working in some area of their life.
They come from a rather chaotic dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Hanging on for dear life.” Their tendency is to hang on to old beliefs, a

pattern that just makes things all the worse, given the nature of the actual
process going on in their life. The emotional reaction is a sense of intense
dissatisfaction and helplessness, along with a suppressed anger, resentment
and hostility. They are the product of a rigid dysfunctional patriarchal
family.

*************************************

“Inner crying.” They are grieving over not being able to do anything about
things in their life. They feel that their life is unpredictable, uncontrollable
and overwhelming. There results mental disorder and small hurts, with a
feeling of being controlled by impersonal external factors such as the
weather or life circumstances.

Underlying all this is a suppressed despair over deprivation that occurred in

childhood, and which seems to be reoccurring now. They grew up in a
demoralizingly dysfunctional family. The helplessness feelings create the
congestion, and the anger generates the inflammation.

RUNNY NOSE

“Inner crying.” There is a constant mourning that is in effect asking for

help.

STUFFY NOSE

“Turd of the Earth.” They are not recognizing their self-worth.

518
SNEEZING

“Devastated.” They are experiencing a loss or an anticipation of loss

reaction.

COUGHING

“Guilt-wilt.” They are bothered by moral responsibility/accountability

feelings, arising out of the belief that they somehow deserve their whole
situation. (See each of these symptoms for more information)

HEAD LICE

“Cootie-ville.” They are suffering from self-disgust and “moral cretin”

feelings. Their experience is that they seem to “have their head up their
rear,” in that their choices and impacts are so apparently detrimental. It is
the result of wrong-making and blame-throwing, perhaps perfectionistic
parenting.

HEAD PROBLEMS

“Hyper-rational.” They are intensely emphasizing their masculine initiating

aspect, with a particular emphasis on the intellect and mind, reason and
logic. They approach everything from their head, and they suppress
intuition, emotions, experience-based learning, and the juicy and earthy
aspects of things. They are the product of a patriarchal mentalistic family.

*************************************

“Royal expectations.” As the creative and contributory one, they expect to

be treated accordingly. They are heavily into internal conflict with authority
or the authorities, with the “heads” of things. They feel that THEY should
be or that they are the potential head of the organization, and they are
frustrated in their attempts to make it happen. Their family was highly
position, standing, prestige, power and domination emphasizing.

*************************************

519
“Ship of fools.” They feel unable to carry out their ideas or undertakings
because others countermand, undermine or interfere with them. They grew
up as the “sane one” in a self-defeatingly dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Thwarted.” They are a frustrated perfectionist, and they tend to have great
difficulty manifesting success. Their family was highly enmeshed and yet
perfection-expecting. They effectively undermined their capacity to grow
away and to successfully function in the world.

*************************************

“On a string.” They feel manipulated like a puppet, and like they’ve lost
face. They have the feeling that everywhere they go they end up being a
pawn of the powers that be. They also constantly experience humiliation at
the hands of their superiors, and even of their colleagues.

They come from a highly domineering patriarchal and authoritarian family

in which the father in particular made it a point to always shame them.

*************************************

“Over here!” They need attention, or they are suffering from unwanted
negative attention. They were largely unsuccessful in attaining recognition,
validation and support in their ferociously competitive and self-immersed
family.

*************************************

“Coming to a head.” Something was just about to mature into manifesting

just before the injury, ailment or illness that damaged their head occurred.
Their family systematically undermined their independence, success,
identity, fulfillment and self-expression.

*************************************

“I’m the boss!” Their conflict with their Higher Self or the Divine authority
is what lies at the base of most of their difficulties. They came up in an

520
authoritarian and overweeningly materialistic family.

RIGHT HEAD PROBLEM

“Gestalt-fearing.” They have issues concerning perception, empathic

resonation, tuning in to the “music” of the world, trend-spotting and
pattern-pickup in a “grokking” type of holistic comprehension manner. This
type of understanding was very threatening to their family.

LEFT HEAD PROBLEM

“Conceptualization-avoiding.” There are conflicts about their utilization of

analysis, logic, reason, abstraction, conceptualization, cognitive
understanding and measurement processes in their dealings with the world.
This kind of “cover-blowing spotlighting” of the nature of things was
anathema to their family.

BACK OF THE HEAD PROBLEM

“Understanding-fearing.” They have issues concerning the processing of

their feelings, images and visualizations. They were not supposed to see or
comprehend what was going down when they were a child.

“BROW POINT” OR “THIRD EYE” PROBLEM

“Cosmic anxieties.” There are conflicts concerning spiritual-pragmatic

integration, intuition, psychic capabilities, penetrating insights, and
prophecy, arising from strongly negative reactions from their family to
these manifestations. (See THIRD EYE AREA PROBLEMS)

CROWN AREA PROBLEM

“Spiritual avoidance.” They are experiencing conflicts over their connection

with the “Home Office” (All that Is). They are spiritually rejecting,
deprived and confused. They feel a cut off from the Divine Source. It comes
from being the child of an authoritarian and patriarchal household.

FRONTAL HEAD PROBLEM

521
“Magical mystery tour.” They have difficulties in dealing with issues of the
integration of information and the interpretation of the implications of
things. It is the effect of having come up in a severely confusing
dysfunctional household.

SCALP PROBLEM

“Delusional conclusion fearing.” They have worries and preoccupations

about the correctness of their interpretations and intentions. They are
plagued by self-doubt and self-distrust generated by a confidence-
undermining family.

TEMPLE AREA PROBLEM

“Thinking-avoidance.” They have conflicts about their introspection,

reflection and associations concerning the meanings of things, and about
their internal dialogue and thinking (talking) with themselves. They
received a severe “Don’t think!” injunction.

RIGHT TEMPLE PROBLEM

“Planning-conflicted.” They are quite concerned about the issue of whether

and how to think about how they go about doing things.

LEFT TEMPLE PROBLEM

“Thought-shame.” They are struggling with their guilt about the fact that
they think about things, and about what they are thinking.

TOP MEDIAN AREA PROBLEM

“Intervention-alarm.” There are issues around the programming of their

actions, around the integration of information with intentions, and around
the melding of their feelings and perceptions with their concepts and ideas.
To take action or initiative had the effect of “setting off World War III”
somehow when they were a child.

HEAD TRAUMA

522
“Who’s in charge here!?” They are in deep conflict with their Higher Self
and/or with the Divine authority, a conflict in which THEY want to be the
one running the show. They feel denied, humiliated and
undermined/prevented.

They are full of rage and despair about everything involved in this. They
have had authority conflict problems all their life, either internally and/or
externally/behaviorally. It has now “come to a head.” It got started with a
great deal of conflict with a dominating parent or with parental conflict
about who was in charge. (See HEAD PROBLEMS; BRAIN PROBLEMS)

HEARING PROBLEMS; “HARDNESS OF HEARING”

“Self-shielding.” They are backing away from vulnerability and

involvement with the social environment, because they feel it is too
irrelevant, painful and/or dangerous. Their experience is that what is being
said and what is going on with other people is detrimental to their health
and best interests.

They are much more comfortable with their own way of doing things and
with their own interpretations than they are in allowing the environment to
impact their lifestyle or belief system. They are a “sealed unit” who is self-
determining and a “self-made person.”

It is a pattern that got started when they were very young in a family in
which they were the “oddball” or the “odd one out.” They found that much
of what went on in the family was either irrelevant or detrimental to them.
Their family in turn often criticized and blamed them when anything went
wrong, and the result is that they developed an “urban hermit” lifestyle.

RIGHT EAR HEARING PROBLEMS

“Boundary-defining.” They are disengaged from the world around them, on

the grounds that it hurts too much to be vulnerable to the processes going
on out there.

LEFT EAR HEARING PROBLEMS

523
“Pulling into their core.” They are putting up a wall around themselves to
prevent any further invasions and violations of their self-system.

*****************************

“Rigid inflexibility.” They are super-set in their ways, and they are not
willing to reconsider their fundamental assumptions and interpretations in
the light of reality.

CENTRAL AUDITORY PROCESSING DEFICIT (Sound-sequencing

problems; language development delay)

“Wandering ears.” Their attention floats along with the perceptual

ambivalence of the moment. They have difficulty staying with what is being
said, with the result that they end up tuning in aperiodically.

Their family tends to be hyper-verbose, chaotic and/or non-referential in

their speaking habits, leading them to attend more to what is going on in the
environment, and to other sensory modalities. They need to learn to listen
with more concentration.

DIFFICULTY IN HEARING (Temporary)

“Overloaded.” They are being inundated with intensely significant

experiences and inputs at present, and it is too much for them to handle. So
they screen out and “creatively hear” a lot lately. It is, however, not an
unfamiliar situation to them.

They grew up in a family in which there were many times when they were
privy to too much awareness for their own good, because the family
depended on them as a confidante, observer and/or “whipping kid” in their
dysfunctional system.

RIGHT EAR HEARING DIFFICULTY

“Environment-avoidance.” They are having problems dealing with all that

is going on around them.

LEFT EAR HEARING DIFFICULTY

524
“Inner voice avoiding.” They are being overwhelmed by what they are
thinking, knowing and feeling.

FIGURE/GROUND AND LOCALIZATION PROBLEMS (“Aural

flatland” -- all sounds are the same level, resulting in inability to distinguish
speech from other sounds, and to trouble determining where sounds are
coming from)

“Constant confusion.” They were programmed to be forever having

difficulty discerning what is being said and what is happening. They were
not supposed to be able to determine the figure from the ground or to set
priorities effectively.

It was an organized attempt to keep them incompetent and ineffective. It

was motivated by intense rage at their being in their mother’s life during the
intrauterine period, resulting in arrested development of the aural nervous
system. The basic message was “Don’t be!” in the form of a “Don’t
understand!” injunction.

LOSS OF HIGHER FREQUENCIES

“Disengaged.” They are involvement/vulnerability-avoidant, arising from

being frequently attacked as being the cause of all their family’s problems.

RIGHT EAR HIGH FREQUENCIES LOSS

“I’m outta here!” They are withdrawing from the environment around them,
because they find it irrelevant and/or detrimental.

LEFT EAR HIGH FREQUENCIES LOSS

“Self-insulated sphere.” They are turning inward and becoming a self-

contained island unto themselves, in order to avoid further violation and/or
betrayal.

LOSS OF LOWER FREQUENCIES

“Self-shielding.” They are avoiding vulnerability to emotional impact and

arousal, due to severely emotional-commotional dysfunctionality in their

525
family that was severely painful.

RIGHT EAR LOWER FREQUENCIES LOSS

“Dear Prudence.” They are withdrawing emotionally from the environment,

due to either hypersensitivity to emotional arousal or to emotional
violations that are occurring.

LEFT EAR LOWER FREQUENCIES LOSS

“Shattered emotional nerves.” They are pulling into their inner core and/or
deflecting any form of emotional availability/vulnerability.

EPISODIC HEARING DIFFICULTY (Periodic lessening of hearing acuity

that is not deteriorative or medical in nature. These episodes are
independent of the content of what is being listened to and of the nature of
the situation at hand.)

“Processing disruptions.” They are undergoing a healing/change process

that is causing diminishments of hearing periodically. These episodes are
related to very early emotional wounds -- usually intrauterine. Due to the
depth and earliness of the issues being processed, it tends to disrupt
pervasively, including their hearing.

RIGHT EAR EPISODIC HEARING DIFFICULTY

“I can’t take any more in.” They are withdrawing from the inputs from the
environment, in an overload reaction.

LEFT EAR EPISODIC HEARING DIFFICULTY

“Tuning out their inner voice.” They are “turning a deaf ear” to internal
processing, guidance and inputs.

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF HEARING

“Electrically amplified.” They experience the world as a blaring invasion

and as an assault to the ears. They are over impacted by normal sounds.

526
They find it abrasive and abusive. It is a part of an overall vaguely negative
take on everything they encounter.

They therefore tend strongly to withdraw into a sound-muffled

environmental and away from social and emotional involvement. They are
rather rejecting and disgusted with the whole world, in a kind of “shrinking
violet” reaction. Sometimes they become “Scrooge” like. They are the
product of an emotionally abrasive invasive and abusive family.

HEART AREA PROBLEMS

“All heart.” They are able to emanate Divine radiance and unlimited giving,
in a manner that is life-providing, life-sharing and love-expressing. They
were shoved to the sidelines of their family early on, which led to their
becoming altruistically wise from a very early age. They then provided
compassion, wisdom, support and spiritual radiance to their rejecting but
dependent family.

They are therefore now able to exhibit compassionate comprehension and

insightful understanding. But the world around them tends to neither
comprehend nor value who and what they are.

*************************************

“Sealed unit.” They are an “urban hermit” who is into heart-shielding self-
protection. They are engaged in love-avoidance and hurt-deflecting
involvement-deflecting. They have intense insecurity, with no confidence in
the Universe or the Divine.

There is no sense of deservingness of love or love-ability, and their

experience is that “love is a poison apple.” They are unable to receive love,
warmth and nurturance. They found that professed and proffered love was a
dangerous and destructive force in their childhood. As a result, they can
neither expect nor receive unconditional love, though they may be able to
emanate it. They were in effect shoved to the sidelines of their family as the
“odd one out.”

*************************************

527
“Emotional-commotional.” They are all over the block emotionally, in a
histrionically expressive manner. They come from an emotional-
commotional dysfunctional family.

HEART ATTACK

“Broken hearted.” They are an “urban hermit” who has never really had any
form of emotionally close relationships -- a “sealed unit” who takes care of
business single-handedly and in an emotionally shielded or shutdown
manner. They were in effect rejected from the very start, and they were
shoved to the sidelines of their family. They therefore ended up with the
profound conviction they don’t deserve love, and that others are
untrustworthy.

*************************************

Scrooge.” They are squeezing all the joy out of the heart in favor of money,
power, position, prestige or the like. They are not expressing and
manifesting love with others, now and/or before. They operate out of
“scarcity assumptions” and the belief in constricting limitations. They judge
themselves as a failure, and they therefore work furiously to accomplish on
the job and to dominate others. They are full of tension, anxiety, resentment
and suppressed aggression.

Underneath, they are a frightened child full of regrets, sorrow and remorse
for a life wasted and a vast wasteland experience. They are the product of
highly judgmental and demanding parenting that never gave them the
message they were “good enough.” (See CORONARY THROMBOSIS)

HEART-BEAT SLOWED

“Alone on their own.” They have been “taking care of business” with in
effect no help from their friends since infancy. They were expected to meet
their own needs in a “Child, PLEASE, I’d rather you do it yourself!”
parenting pattern. The result is a chronic low-key depression that is
reflected in their slowed down heart rate.

528
“HEARTBURN” (Burning distress behind the sternum, due to spasms of
the esophagus or of the upper stomach, resulting in acid coming up)

“Happiness-horror.” They have an intense, pervasive and clutching fear that

is tripped off by their experiencing some joy or happiness. They have a
horrifying sense of impending attack for “undeserved” joy. They are getting
what they want for once, and they feel that somehow they should not -- that
it violates the Cosmic or moral order somehow. They are anticipating
retribution for the just rewards of their efforts and essence.

It was generated in a severely restrictive, disapproving, moralistic and fear-

inducing childhood. They came out of it with an intense fear of the
Universe as a harshly judgmental and punitive place. There is also an
intense abandonment-and betrayal-paranoia based in part on past lives.

***********************************

“Burning to be free.” They are stuffing themselves and their feelings, out of
a fear of catastrophic consequences if they let go and “let fly with
themselves.” They are now reaching the point where “This is an up with
which I can no longer put!”

It comes from growing up in a family in which it was not acceptable for

them to be themselves or to threaten to grow away by becoming themselves
in a destiny-manifesting manner.

***********************************

“Purple passion.” They are intensely involved and activated over something
-- love or anger that is very pronounced -- and it is scaring the hell out of
them. They are operating with a pronounced injunction not to feel, and
especially not to feel strongly. It is a pattern that got started in their highly
feeling-suppressing and/or denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

HEART BY-PASS OPERATION

“Heartless.” They are operating in a cold manner, in the sense of not

allowing or believing in the flow of love. They have to “hands on control”

529
everything or “it will all go to Hell in a breadbasket.” They are functioning
like an “over-extended octopus,” trying to do it all single-handedly, with no
help from friends.

They are operating with the underlying conscious or unconscious

assumption that they are alone on their own, an ejectee-rejectee-dejectee
from the Cosmos, because either there is no God or they blew it royally
with the “Home Office,” (All that Is) and they are getting their “just
desserts.”

It is the result of “Never good enough!” parenting in a family in which they

were nevertheless regarded as the “linchpin” of the system whose fault
everything is. (The more valves to be by-passed and the more frequent the
operation, the more intense this dynamic is.)

“HEART FAILURE”

“Died with their boots on.” They had been “in the saddle” since early
infancy, when they found out that there was no one there to meet their needs
or those of the situation. So they rose to the challenge and became the
“buck stops here” person everywhere they went. Now the buck has stopped
for them.

***********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. A small percentage of

events are indeed accidental for purposes of constantly creating new
situations for us to handle that are the result of neither our will nor the
Divine Design. The purpose is to continuously challenge us with growth-
generating events. It should be noted in this regard that “shinola happens”
too.

“HEART MURMUR”

“Heart-hurt.” They received an at best ambivalent reception in the womb,

and they are resigned to a life with little or no love, or to one in which there
is much ambivalence. They just don’t expect much in the way of love in
their life.

530
HEART PROBLEMS

“Broken-hearted.” They are abandonment-paranoid and rejection-expecting.

They are desperately dependent and rescuing in the hope that someone will
rescue them. They have little or no sense of personal worth or
deservingness of love, as if they lost out in the “love sweepstakes”
altogether.

They feel they are “unfit for human consumption,” and that no one could,
would or should ever be there with and for them. Yet hope springs eternal,
and they constantly put out reams of heart energy and service in the heart of
their hearts dream that some day their prince(ss) will come.

It is the result of a loveless, shame-inducing and exploitative dysfunctional

family who gave them no support, nurturance, acceptance or fulfillment.

*************************************

“Home is where the hurt is.” They are trapped in an ungiving, rejecting and
harmful relationship. To them, it is all they can expect, and they have a
history of such relationships. Their mother and later their family held them
responsible and accountable for all of their experiences, particularly the
negative ones. They therefore feel that they have to take on the
responsibility for trying to “get the God Housekeeping Seal of Approval”
from disapproving intimates.

*************************************

“Hardening of the heart.” They have a bad case of “heartless” attitude. They
are joyless, and they have the intense belief in the necessity of stress and
strain. They feel that they have never experienced any approval from others,
and they have become embittered and encased as a result.

They have lost their capacity for compassion, and they are unable to
manifest agape and universal love or acceptance, and they are unable to
process love. They are feeling-suppressing, cut off from any form of love,
and hung up in principles. They are also repressing their reaction to being
rejected in childhood.

531
There is a distinct resemblance to “Scrooge” in their workaholic, achieve-
aholic intimacy-avoidance, along with a certain “Type A” drivenness. There
is a great deal of extremely suppressed grief and pain that they simply will
not get in touch with at all costs. They are totally self-immersed, input-
deflecting, hard-hearted, rejecting, vengeful, unforgiving, and hateful, as a
manifestation of long-standing emotional problems.

It arose as a function of being treated in the same manner as a child, as well

as from their finding that “giving it back harder” worked.

*************************************

“Stress and strain.” They have long-standing emotional problems that lead
to constant upheaval, difficulties, discombobulation and trauma. Their
experience is that they can expect nothing different, and that they deserve
no better.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional and blame-throwing

family. They harped on how “You asked for it, asshole!” to such a degree
that the individual now believes it in their heart.

HEART-STOPPAGE -- SUDDEN

“Death implant.” They have just violated the ultimate taboo of really
beginning to have success in work and/or love, and the result is that they
have been given a clear message that it is absolutely not allowed.

They were told in no uncertain terms in effect that if they ever cross the line
to self-manifestation and destiny development, they are to “stop dead in
their tracks.” It is the result of a severely possessive “Don’t sit under the
apple tree with anyone else but me” parenting pattern from the mother. At
base, her intention was, “If I can’t have you, nobody can!”

************************************

“Scrooge.” They are trying to squeeze all the joy out of their heart -- in
favor of money, power, position, prestige or the like. They are not
expressing and manifesting love with others -- now and/or before. They

532
operate out of scarcity assumptions and the belief in constricting
limitations.

They tend to judge themselves as a failure and therefore work furiously to

accomplish on the job and to dominate others. They are full of tension,
anxiety, resentment and suppressed aggression.

Underneath, they are a frightened child who is full of regrets, sorrow and
remorse for a life wasted and for a “vast wasteland” experience. They are
the product of highly judgmental and demanding parenting that never gave
them the message that they were good enough.

HEART VALVE PROBLEMS

“Can’t let love in.” They are something of an “urban hermit” whose
experience is either that “love is a four letter word” and/or that they don’t
deserve and they can’t count on love. They are the product of an
untrustworthy early emotional environment, and they ended up doing a
“one man band operation” on the emotional level, in essence working to
provide themselves whatever love they can manage to muster all by
themselves.

HEAT-HATING

“Fulminating fury.” They have to deal with repressed rage and resentment
at being restricted and exploited by their parent(s). It has resulted in a
“serve-aholic” and a self-denying pattern ever since, and they are
compulsively co-dependent. They hate it, but they can’t do anything about
it.

HEAT-LOVING

“Alone on their own.” They are suffering from suppressed deprivation-grief

arising from pervasive and persistent lack of support throughout their
infancy and childhood. It resulted in a “self-made person” who very
strongly believes there is no one out there for them, and even that “God
might be Al Capone.” They are a “sealed unit” -- “island unto themselves” -
- “urban hermit.”

533
“HEAT PROSTRATION” (Complete overwhelm by high temperature
environments)

“Fried.” They feel overloaded with demands, expectations and

responsibilities with very high stakes, and they can’t take it any more. It is a
bad case of a “the buck stops here” syndrome. It got started in their severely
dysfunctional, demanding and denigrating family, where they were
expected to be the “family hoist” while simultaneously being blamed for
everything that went wrong. Now they are on the verge of “checking out”
because they have reached the point where “This is an up with which I will
no long put!” (See “HEAT STROKE”)

HEAT RASH

“Repressed rage.” They are deeply resentful over their life of over-
responsibility, exploitation and accusation, yet they dare not experience or
express it for fear of catastrophic consequences -- both to themselves and to
the ecology. They come from a severely self-immersed, exploitative and
functionally abusive family.

“HEAT-STROKE” (Dizziness, nausea, spots before their eyes)

“Get me outta here!” They are feeling overwhelmed and very oppressed by
their current circumstances. They are highly co-dependent and over-
responsible for everyone in their life’s problems, and they hate it. They are
disgusted and revolted, and their feeling is that “This is an up with which I
will no long put!” It came from out of nowhere in a “return of the
repressed” fashion as their situation reactivated their childhood experiences
in spades. They were systematically suppressed, exploited and blamed by
their dysfunctional family. (See “HEAT PROSTRATION”)

HEEL SPUR (Calcification growths on bottom of the heels and at the

Achilles heels)

“Go ahead -- everybody else does!” They have a way of wearing a “Kick
me!” sign that elicits rejection and abuse. The have the bottom line feeling
that somehow they deserve it, and they are into intense resignation and
resentment about it all. They were the scapegoat and “identified problem”

534
in their severely dysfunctional family, who blamed them for everything that
went wrong.

RIGHT HEEL SPUR

“NOW what have I done?!” They have grave concern about their ecological
impact.

LEFT HEEL SPUR

“There I go AGAIN!” They have deep self-distrust and self-disgust.

HEMOPHILIA (Defective blood-clotting)

“Drain out.” They have serious boundary problems, and they feel that they
have to “care take” the world. They were never allowed to have their own
needs or any limits on the demands that were made of them. It is the
ultimate co-dependency pattern. At the soul level, this situation was chosen
as a karma payback, as an experience-expansion, or as an example-provider.

HEMORRHAGING (Uncontrolled outpouring of blood)

“Blown away.” They are experiencing profound emotional trauma or

upsets, resulting in uncontrollable emotional outbursts. Their experience is
that they have been completely devastated by what is happening, and that
they are totally unable to handle it.

This can either reflect a truly overwhelming set of circumstances or it can

be reflective of a sense of having been driven “over the line” in a life
pattern that has been consistently painful and difficult. Even in the
circumstantial case, the situation reflects their life pattern of being in over
their head in emotional difficulties.

HEMORRHOIDS (Enlarged protruding and painful veins around the anus)

“Self-squashing.” They are deathly afraid to let go, in a kind of “run amok-
anxiety” reaction to their whole life. They are highly restricted and
restrained in their functioning, and they are terrified of generating rejection,

535
retaliation or remorse. They are the product of a severely
suppressive/oppressive household.

*************************************

“Over-burdened.” They are carrying the world on their shoulders, as they

experience it. Their feeling is that the buck always stops with them, and that
they have to rise to the challenge, lest all hell break loose. They were the
“family hoist” in their severely dysfunctional system, and they functioned
as the disaster-deflector and the “sane one.”

*************************************

“I’m late! I’m late!” They have a dread and great fear of deadlines, because
they are forever running late and coming up a day late and a dollar short.
They have the overwhelming pattern of not being able to say no, and of
over-committing, so that they are always strung out 16 ways to breakfast
and effectively letting people down one way or another. They are intensely
rejection-abhorrent, and they are also rather massively over-responsible.

It comes from being blamed for everything that went wrong in the
dysfunctional family, so that they ended up seeking to atone and to make up
for their being “bad, wrong and evil.”

*************************************

“Repressed resentment.” They are “sitting on” a lot of anger and anxiety
over their quality of life and about the potential threats of serious calamities
hanging over their head. Their experience is that they just have to “bite the
bullet” and to “make lemonade” out of the “lemons” that life hands them so
often. They feel rather largely “at effect” rather than at cause. Indeed,
intervention rather frightens them because it has so often “blown up in their
face” in the form of “lash-backs,” accusations, punishments and “escalating
disasters.”

They were intensely programmed to be systematically self-defeating, and at

the same time, they were forced to be self-suppressing in a severely
patriarchal, oppressive, exploitative and overtly or covertly abusive family.

536
 *************************************

“Bile-blowout.” They are full of fear, anger and hatred about the past, and
they have a lot of explosive rage. There is also fear of exploitation, and they
are afraid to let go. They have numerous other anxieties, worries and
irritations, particularly around money.

There is intense exertion expended over control of the environment. They

are in a continuous conflict between trying to get something out and holding
on for dear life. They engage in a “zipper-lip” closed-mouthed and non-
expression of their feelings of being over-burdened.

There is a carefully hidden guilt and spite reaction that got started during a
very harsh toilet training, and that was consistently and continuously
reiterated throughout their childhood, in a highly oppressive and distrustful
household.

HEPATITIS (Inflammation of the liver)

“Competence-anxiety.” They have great fear arising out of experienced

powerlessness, self-doubts and guilt. They are totally overloaded with
demands, and that they are unable to deal with them. It arose in a highly
dysfunctional and enraging family who demanded far too much, and who
instilled deep-seated self-doubt and cope-ability-anxiety.

************************************

“Volcanic fury.” They are sitting on a lot of seething resentment of the past,
and they are full of anger and hatred. All of which is projected out as
accusations of corruption and exploitation. They come from a highly
patriarchal, exploitative, abusive, accusative and accountability-attributing
family.

************************************

“No way, Jose!” They are manifesting an intense resistance to change. In

their experience, new means trouble, loss, pain, frustration and even
disaster. Theirs was a severely self-defeating, chaotic, out of control

537
dysfunctional family. They reacted by disengaging as much as possible, and
by setting up rigidly adhered to routines and resources as a safety-seeking
strategy.

HERNIA (Internal organ protruding through the muscles)

“Serve-aholic.” They are forever over-burdened, under severe strain, and

involved in inappropriate applications and expressions of their creativity.
They feel that they have to continuously “atone for” and to “make up for”
their being “bad, wrong and evil.” They feel like they caused World War II,
and they are intensely guilt-grabbing, shame-framing and self-denying/self-
punishing.

They are the product of a severely blame-framing, enmeshed, exploitative,

punitive and rejecting family.

************************************

“Ruptured relationships.” It seems that every time they get into any kind of
close or important relationship, it ends up erupting, ripping apart or
rupturing. They are a workaholic who is so endlessly busy and emotionally
unavailable that they become maddening to their intimates.

It is the result of being shoved to the sidelines of their family early on, in an
“odd one out” and “family freak” pattern. They reacted by trying to prove
their worth and acceptability by compulsive contribution.

************************************

“Hands on domination/determination.” They are super-self-suppressing and

manically controlling of the environment. They try to pin everything down -
- especially themselves -- in a “Lilliput-like million little ropes” pattern.
They rupture all their relationships, as they struggle under the strain of
enormous burdens, as they experience it.

Much of what they do is incorrect manifestation of creative expression in

the direction of trying to “hands on” determine everything. They are also
prone to feel that they deserve punishment for what they are, and they are

538
apt to be quite self-punishing. They are the product of an
oppressive/suppressive and exploitative family.

*************************************

“Powder keg.” They are a compressed container of rage about to go off, and
they are engaged in a frantic effort to control their anger. They do so by
pretending it isn’t there in an ostrich-like manner, which only generates
events and outcomes that feed the volcano inside. They feel that life is “so
pressing,” and they try to ignore it all, resulting in self-violence and self-
injury.

They have a considerable amount of “run amok-anxiety” and guilt arising

from an extremely punitive and controlling upbringing. (See the body
area(s) affected for more information)

HERNIATED DISC (Torn-apart platelet between the vertebrae)

“Cop-out artist.” They are engaged in chronic problem-avoidance, as they

try to put it behind them whenever they can. It is an “ostrich approach” that
they learned in their denial-dominated and accountability/responsibility-
ducking dysfunctional family. (See SPINAL DISC PROBLEMS for what it
means to have the particular disc involved rupture)

HERPES; HERPES GENITALIS (Viral blisters on the sexual area)

“Mea culpa.” They have a massive belief in sexual guilt and the need for
punishment. They are convinced that God is going to punish them for being
who they are. They are full of public shame, especially around their sexual
nature. They are intensely rejecting of their genitals and of themselves.

They are angry and anxious about themselves and their situation. They have
a rather strong “alone and alien” loneliness, along with the feeling they are
“unfit for human consumption.” It all comes from a “tantalizing tarantula”
seductive-destructive, entice -- arouse -- attack, sex-ploitative/punitive
parenting pattern. They were made to feel like an utter “moral cretin” for
being a sexual being.

539
HERPES SIMPLEX; HERPES LABIALIS (Blister clusters on the mouth)

“Vast wasteland.” They are experiencing intense grief-rage over the lack or
loss of support and resources. They also feel underneath that they deserve it
somehow. At the same time, they are quite bitter and resentful underneath,
with a raging desire to complain and expound on it all. But they are too
afraid to say anything about it, and they are full of unspoken bitter words.

This whole thing reactivates early deprivation reactions, from a time when
to object to losses or lacks only made it worse in their self-immersed
dysfunctional family.

HIATAL HERNIA (Internal organ protruding above the stomach, producing

excess bile, sour stomach, and much belching)

“Paranoid hostility.” They are sitting on an intensely suppressed

subconscious vengeful viciousness. They are highly judgmental and
resentful of everyone and everything. They are feeling over-burdened with
having to track everything, and they are experiencing a deep sense of
deprivation and frustrated dependency needs. The result is a great deal of
“run amok-anxiety” arising from their unconscious hatred over this life
experience.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional family in which there was
a great deal of subterranean sabotage and hateful hostility towards the world
and towards each other. They can’t imagine ever truly trusting anything or
anyone -- least of all themselves -- as a result.

“HICCABURP” (A single audible hiccough immediately followed by a

belch)

“Enough already!” It is reflective of a sense of overwhelm-anxiety -- the

feeling that too much is happening too fast for them to handle in their
current circumstances. It also represents resignation-resentment and
implication-freak outs, along the lines of their feeling that they are unable to
do anything, and that they simply put up with the demands and deprivations
of their life. They feel over-responsible, under-supported and insufficiently
resourced.

540
They were the “family hoist” in their dysfunctional family, and they
constantly had to deal with more than they could cope with, along with
demands that were well beyond their capabilities -- all in high stakes
situations.

HICCOUGHS; HICCUPS

“Gasp-gulping.” Their heart is leaping to their throat in a “gasping” reaction

to what is going down or coming up. They leap to implication-freakouts and
fear of impending developments. It reflects a sense of helpless haplessness
in the face of events. It results in sudden swallowing and gulping of air.

It is a pattern that got started early on in a frighteningly dysfunctional

family in which they never knew what was going to come off the wall next
or how bad it would or where it would ultimately take them.

HIP PROBLEMS

“Unbalanced immobilization.” They have a real fear of going forward in

major decisions because they feel so unbalanced, and because they feel that
there is nothing to move forward towards. They have a rather poor
integration of the self with the world around them, and they are afraid of the
future.

They also have the feeling that there is nothing to look forward to in their
life. They fear the misuse and abuse of power and strength, either by them
or by others towards them or both. They feel that they have no support from
the world around them.

There was an intense imbalance of power in their home, with a severe

domination by the wishes of the other family members, but especially by
the mother. It had the effect of demoralizing and immobilizing them.

************************************

“Sexually agitated.” They are severely conflicted about and suppressed with
regard to sexuality. They were sexually suppressed and yet sex-ploitated at
the same time during childhood. There was a subtle seductive-destructive

541
“tantalize-chastise” pattern going on. There is a strong mother-fixation
operative here.

RIGHT HIP PROBLEM

“Involvement-ambivalence.” They have rather intense conflicts about how

to go about connecting and fitting in to the world. There are concerns and
confusions about how to be non-intimately sexual.

They have a fundamental sense of deviance and non-meshing with things,

because they were trained to be a misfit by their possessive family so as to
“keep them around the old homestead.”

LEFT HIP PROBLEM

“Bonding-incompetence.” There are issues concerning their sense of a lack

of belonging, connectedness, and intimacy, both sexual and non-sexual.
There is a felt lack of groundedness and gross incompetence in this arena.

This is the “urban hermit” inability to be vulnerable and close, because to

do so is to invite destruction, to judge from their family experience.

HIP JOINT PROBLEMS

“Oh NO!” They are intensely reluctant to proceed in the direction that
things seem to be headed. They are unbendingly resistant to moving
forward on this. They have a strong distrust of themselves with regard to
their relationship to power and/or sexuality, and they also don’t trust the
world or the Universe.

They are the product of a distrust-inducing dysfunctional family who made

them highly insecure about their own motivational systems, and of the
environment around them.

RIGHT HIP JOINT PROBLEM

“DON’T MOVE!” They are being rather paranoid about themselves and the
world around them, as if they would “set off World War III” if they moved
forward in the direction things seem to be going.

542
LEFT HIP JOINT PROBLEM

“Disengagement.” They are being avoidant of “joining the party,” of

connecting, of becoming intimately or vulnerably involved. They don’t trust
either themselves or others in the realm of relationship.

HIP DISPLACEMENT

“Alone and at effect.” They have no sense of free will or freedom of choice
with regard to their direction of manifestation. They are operating with a
lack of support, because they won’t let support in. That, in turn, is because
“love is a poison apple” in their experience. Their family was intrusively
possessive and non-allowing of self-development.

HIP REPLACEMENT

“Enough, already!” They have so had it with regard to the whole process of
potency-suppression that their surrounding environments have always
imposed upon them. They are now ready to embark on a world-influencing
path.

RIGHT HIP REPLACEMENT

“I’ll cause World War III!” They were systematically trained to believe that
they were untrustworthy and potentially dangerous in their environmental
impact. No more!

LEFT HIP REPLACEMENT

“Not AGAIN!” They are deeply self-distrusting about their choice of

intimates, based on their track record. The past was, though. It’s OVER!

DYSPLASTIC HIPS (They don’t mature to full size)

“Expression-suppression.” They have profound conflicts around

manifesting their identity, personal power, sexuality and destiny. They were
told in effect by their childhood experiences never to develop their personal
potency or destiny, and to remain a perennial and asexual child.

543
H.I.V. POSITIVE (Human Immuno-Deficiency Virus)

“Worthless turd.” They have a strong belief in not being good enough.
There is much self-intolerance and self-rejection, resulting in self-
destructive potentials. They are feeling defenseless and that nobody cares.
They have considerable sexual guilt imposed by an over-possessive and yet
simultaneously rejecting and wrong-making mother. It is in effect a severe
maternal deprivation and denigration reaction.

“HIVES” (Red and itchy small eruptions on the skin)

“Abandonment-anxiety.” They were subjected to intense ambivalence and

to severe acceptance/rejection games by their mother. They are too terrified
of being “abandoned on a desert island” (which they assume they deserve)
to do anything to change their situation or the nature of their relationships.

*************************************

“Punching bag.” They feel endangered and unfairly attacked, particularly

by their family, intimates or close relationship people. They feel they are
taking a beating, and that they are helpless to do anything about it. They
experience being knocked around, hammered on, mistreated, betrayed or
subjected to injustices.

They also feel personally persecuted for everything that happens. When
attacked, they take it out on themselves rather than risk the losses involved
in standing up for themselves or attacking back. They are the product of an
abusive, accountability-attributing and blame-throwing family.

*************************************

“Harm-avoidance.” They are very fearful, and they have many small
“molehill” hidden fears of which they “make mountains.” Underlying this is
a feeling of being personally responsible for everything that is -- a feeling
that arises from the conviction they are the center of their universe.

Their family responded to them by expecting them to take care of

everything, and they therefore took an unconscious accusatory stance

544
towards the individual when anything went wrong. This generated a very
deep and pervasive abandonment-anxiety in them, and they now personally
take charge of everything as an acceptance-earning and a rejection-and
abandonment-deflecting or abandonment-delaying tactic.

*************************************

“Root of all evil.” They have a kind of inverse megalomania, in that they
have come away from their formative process with the unconscious
conviction they are responsible for everything that goes on, especially that
which goes wrong.

They were responded to as being capable of “making it all better,” due to

some inherent or apparent superiority. However, when they, being only a
child, could not live up to such high expectations, their family became
enraged at them, and they pounded in that they were the cause of
everyone’s problems. (See the area(s) affected for more information)

HODGKIN’S DISEASE (Enlargement of lymph glands and spleen --

cancerous)

“Not good enough.” They have a virulent self-blame and a tremendous fear
of not being sufficient to the cause. They are engaged in a frantic race to
prove themselves over and over, in a desperate attempt to be accepted --
until finally their blood has no substance left to support itself.

The joy of life is forgotten in the desperate struggle for acceptance by

“standins for the original cast” of totally unpleasable parent(s). They end up
with no self-validation capacity, and with no ability to express themselves
or to receive anything.

HOMICIDE VICTIM

“Outta here!” The soul’s decision was to leave body now. This can either
represent the completion of its intentions for this life, or a reassessment of
their situation and a utilization of this “rapid exit” method as the conclusion
of this re-appraisal of what to do next.

545
 ************************************

“Self-destruct.” Here the individual was in effect an accident waiting to

happen. The underlying motivation was massive self-rejection, combined
with insufficient impetus to “take the bull by the horns.” There are many
situations in which this can happen.

Some examples:

“I don’t belong here!” They have a feeling of not deserving to exist and a
resulting constant courting of death as an expression of that. It arises from a
rather intensely neglectful or non-involved parenting pattern.

They were operating out of “delusions of invincibility,” in a compulsive

“risk-aholic” and “dare-devil” lifestyle. It arises from an underlying
conviction that no one is any damned good. It is due to being treated as the
“intimate enemy” by a catastrophe-courting family.

*********************************

“I deserve the very worst.” They were told they could do no right and they
were “bad, wrong and evil.”

*********************************

“Quasimodo.” They were a professional rejection-courter who believed

their own “bad press.” It comes from being “fail-safe” trained to be “unfit
for human consumption” so they could be counted on to end up staying
around the old homestead.

*********************************

“See how I’m hurting myself!” They were engaged in a “slow self-destruct”
lifestyle generated by being ignored until they did something to harm
themselves.

*********************************

546
“Assassination-seeking.” They were told they were the cause of all evils by
an out-classed and overwhelmed family, and they believed it.

**********************************

“Playing on the freeway.” They were told they were in the way, and that the
world would be better off without them.

**********************************

“Shit happens.” In this situation, the random generator component of the

Universe has operated. A small percentage of events are indeed accidental
for purposes of constantly creating new situations for us to handle that are
the result of neither our will nor the Divine Design. Incidentally, shinola
happens too, in this regard.

“HOOF AND MOUTH” DISEASE (Severe skin eruptions and boils,

caught from cattle)

“Fulminating fury.” They have an intense suppressed rage and seething

injustice-nurturing around deprivations and degradations they have
experienced and/or are experiencing. It is a long-standing pattern that is
now “coming to a boil” for purposes of healing or as a result of things
coming to head in their life around this issue of being betrayed, belittled or
bedeviled. It is the result of a severely passive-aggressive dysfunctional
family.

“HOOK WORM” (Small intestinal parasite)

“Massive competence-anxiety.” They are terrified to strike out on their own

or to stand on their own rights, their own ground, and their own two feet,
for fear of the “ultimate blow-it.” They have no trust of themselves, and
they are convinced that there is an answer that they don’t have and that
others do. It’s a pattern that got started in a “never good enough” parenting
situation in which they frantically tried over and over and over to get the
“God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” -- and they forever failed to do so.

547
The result is that now they feel that they lack the “secret for success and
worth” that everyone else has, and have to keep trying with “standins for
the original cast” in reruns of the original scenario until they “get it right,”
finally, they hope.

So they keep on trying to “find the key,” and in the meantime, they turn
everything over to those in the know or to those they think hold the
“Golden Orb of Final Validation.” As a result, they give their power to
others, letting them take over everything in their life. They end up having to
deal with constant interference and exploitation in their life.

HORMONAL PROBLEMS

“Heavy issues.” They are experiencing intense lack of resolution, conflicts,

inundations, and/or severe threats regarding deep matters that stem from
very early emotional damage. They need to come to some clearing of these
issues now.

***********************************

“Emotional-commotional.” They are on an “emotional roller coaster”

regarding their relationship with themselves, with others, with the world
and/or with the Universe. They grew up in a disruptively dysfunctional
family, and they ended up at the mercy of their reactions instead of using
them as information for coping and problem-solving.

***********************************

“Unbalanced.” They are operating like a “careening cannon,” with the

associated ecological impacts and self-damaging. They are the product of a
severely destructive and demoralizing family who had the effect of
programming them to be systematically self-destructive.

HOT EXTREMITIES, CHRONIC

“Poor boundaries.” They have a pronounced propensity to get over-

involved in, impacted upon and over-heated by things. They are a “serve-

548
aholic” and a “rescue-tripper” who can’t keep their hands off of things.
They feel that it is up to them to meet all needs and to deflect all disasters.

They were the “family hoist” person in their family who was expected to
“make it all better.”

***********************************

“Right and righteous.” They are highly judgmental and negatively

assumptive, and they act on their takes on things in an invasive manner.
They are chronically infuriated at everything, and they have the resulting
absolute imperative to intervene.

They are the product of a severely and implacably dysfunctional family

who held them responsible and accountable for everything that went wrong
-- which it almost always did.

HOT FEET – CHRONIC

“Silently seething.” They feel both powerless in and victimized by the

world. They tend strongly to life “at effect” rather than “at cause,” and it
greatly irritates them. They are the product of a passive-aggressive and
suppressive household.

***********************************

“Steamed up.” They are forever fuming over the frustrations and set backs
of life. Their experience is that they are being constantly thwarted by the
course of events, systems and priorities of the world.

They are intensely willful and one-pointed in their functioning, and they are
always running into conflicts between their priorities and those of the
surrounding environment. They are the product of a patriarchal family who
either capitulated to their demands and/or encouraged their river-pushing
style.

RIGHT FOOT CHRONIC HOTNESS

549
“Blocked action.” Their experience is that they are continually being
prevented from making the kind of impact on things that they want.

LEFT FOOT CHRONIC HOTNESS

“Self-frustration.” They have the experience of “I’ve met the enemy, and
it’s me.” It seems that every time they set out to do something, they get in
their own way.

CHRONICALLY HOT TOES

“Ill-executed moves.” They have a tendency to botch up their intervention

efforts.

HOT HANDS, CHRONIC

“CHARGE!” They have this intensely driven need to intervene and to “set
things right.” They are something of a serve-aholic who feels that it is
imperative that they correct situations. They were the “family hoist” for
their severely dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“What’s good for General Bullmoose is good for EVERYBODY!” They are
convinced that their way is the only right way. They are intensely self-
referencing and judgmental, and they impose their evaluations,
interpretations and intentions on the environment everywhere they go. They
are the product of an intensely patriarchal and authoritarian dysfunctional
family.

RIGHT HAND CHRONIC HOTNESS

“Frustrated re-former.” They are forever feeling that they are being
prevented from “making it all better.”

LEFT HAND CHRONIC HOTNESS

“Always outraged.” They take the stance that the world is going to hell in a
breadbasket, and they are utterly disgusted and enraged by that.

550
CHRONICALLY HOT FINGERS

“Hot head.” They are always itching to grab hold of things to “make things
right.”

CHRONICALLY HOT NOSE

“Helmsman.” They have the intense feeling that it is their duty to intervene
whenever things start going wrong, as they experience it.

CHRONICALLY HOT EARS

“Embarrassment/shame.” They labor under a constant feeling that they are

not doing enough about things.

HOT EXTREMITIES, TEMPORARY

“I gotta do it!” They are being driven into intervening in things as a

function of their intense concern about what is going on. They literally
can’s stand by and let things happen, in this situation or phase of their life.
They were the “pivot person” in their dysfunctional and constant
intervention-requiring family.

HOT FEET – TEMPORARY

“Blocked field goal.” They have undergone an experience that is felt to be a

rather highly frustrating setback. They tend to be sensitized to this kind of
thing anyway, since they so often have the feeling that they are forever
finding that they can’t make things happen in their life. They come from a
family in which they were indeed prevented from influencing the flow of
events a lot of the time.

***********************************

“What, AGAIN!” They have encountered yet another setback in their

efforts to move things forward. They are rather intensely determined in their
functioning, and they don’t take thwartings well. Their family gave them
the expectation that they can make things happen pretty much at will.

551
RIGHT FOOT TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“They’re at it again!” Their experience is that there is a systematic process

afoot that is designed to derail their progress.

LEFT FOOT TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“Here’s ANOTHER fine mess I’ve gotten myself into!” They operate with a
considerable amount of self-distrust, based on how things go for them.

HOT HANDS, TEMPORARY

“Implementation-insistence.” They feel that they are absolutely required to

take over and to hands-on determine the outcome of this situation. They
were the “linchpin” of their severely dysfunctional family.

RIGHT HAND TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“Le’ me at it!” They simply HAVE to intervene in the situation as they

experience it.

LEFT HAND TEMPORARY HOTNESS

“I can’t live with myself if I don’t.” Their whole self-concept and self-
acceptance is based upon their correcting the condition of things.

HOT TOES, TEMPORARY

“My identity demands it.” It is a matter of self-consistency that they DO

something about this. Virtually all of their self-respect and felt right to exist
was put on the line by their intervention-demanding family.

HOT FINGERS, TEMPORARY

“Implementation-insistence.” They feel that they are absolutely required to

take over and to hands-on determine the outcome of this situation. They
were the “linchpin” of their severely dysfunctional family.

HOT NOSE, TEMPORARY

552
“Firm determination.” They are hell-bent-for-leather to intervene in the
situation at hand.

HOT EARS, TEMPORARY

“Passionate investment.” They are deeply moved by the situation, and they
feel that they can’t not intervene.

*************************************

“Acutely embarrassed.” They feel a good deal of shame over their not being
able to intervene at this time.

“HOT FLASHES”

“Hot to trot.” They have intense impulses to engage in erotic endeavors

arising from a combination of abandonment-anxiety about not being
acceptable, on the one hand, with strong resentment over sex-ploitation and
patriarchal oppression on the other.

There is a desperate desire to be loved and a profound outrage at being

rejected and belittled, both in childhood and throughout their adult life. It
was generated by seductive, oppressive, exploitative and shame-inducing
parenting.

***************************************

“Royally pissed off.” They have had a lifetime of paranoid patriarchal

discrimination, exploitation and abuse, and it is an up with which they will
no longer put. They are intensely angry about how their life has gone and/or
is going, and they are grimly determined to turn over a new leaf. They may
also have strong desires for vengeance and vindication as well.

HOTNESS; FEELING HOT; HAVING HOT SKIN

“Scorch-out.” They have to deal with a considerable amount of anger,

resentment, and a great desire to strike out. But they are afraid to act on
their feelings because of deep-seated abandonment-anxiety and shame. Or
they are being driven up the wall with intense erotic arousal. Often they go

553
together, as they are the result of “tantalizing tarantula” seductive-
destructive, sex-ploitative and shame-inducing parenting.

“HPV” (Human Papilloma Virus) [Genital warts, often sexually

transmitted]

“Mea Culpa.” They have a strong belief in sexual guilt and the need for
punishment. They have the feeling that God is going to punish them for
being who they are. They have a good deal of shame, especially around
their sexual nature.

They are angry and anxious about themselves and their situation. There is a
rather strong “alone and alien” loneliness, along with the feeling that they
are somehow “unfit for human consumption.” It all came from a
“tantalizing tarantula” seductive-destructive, sex-ploitative and punitive
parenting pattern. They were made to feel like a “moral cretin” for being a
sexual being.

HUNTINGTON’S CHOREA (Involuntary muscle spasms, constant

tremors, mental deterioration)

“Why don’t you listen to me?!” They are intensely resentful at not being
able to change who others are and how they operate. They have a feeling
that it is their personal responsibility to hold up the whole Universe and to
“make it all better.”

They feel like a horrible failure when their efforts to handle everything
don’t do the trick. They then go into a profound self-attack mode, along
with feeling utterly hapless, helpless and hopeless. They are deeply
depressed, and they have a great deal of unsolvable sorrow. It came from
being the “family hoist” in a severe self-destructive dysfunctional and
vampirishly dependent family.

HYPER-ACTIVITY; HYPER-REACTIVITY (Continuous over-activity --

usually in children)

“Intense competence-anxiety.” They have the feeling of being severely

pressured to perform beyond their capabilities. They are engaged in frantic-

554
manic efforts to distract themselves and/or the environment away from the
felt enormous demands to do the impossible.

They have a deep sense of neediness that is like a gaping maw that can’t be
filled. They feel utterly unable to generate the circumstances, resources and
capabilities to meet their needs. They are continuously agitated, and they
are intensely frustrated about their being in that state.

It comes from being in a household in which there is too much going on for
them to handle, and in which they are expected to do more than they are
equipped to carry out. Or they were systematically given the experience that
they don’t have what it takes to make it. Or they fell into the overwhelmed
reaction, and then they were regarded as having a “broken brain.” Or they
may have some combination of all three.

HYPER-GLYCEMIA (Excess blood sugar)

“Strung out.” They are so busy taking care of the world that they don’t
know how to take care of themselves. They are forever on the go trying to
coverall the bases single-handed. Their family relied heavily upon them as
the behind-the-scenes “pivot person” and they learned a rescuing and self-
depriving lifestyle from it.

***************************************

“Over-amped.” They are being flooded with energy and the goodies of life -
- too much for their own good. They are enslaved to the hedonic value of
whatever they are involved in, due to over-indulgent and under-requiring
parenting.

HYPER-PARATHYROIDISM (Excessive calcium secretion, leading to

passive reactivity and/or an amotivational syndrome)

“Serving themselves up on a platter.” They are giving their power away in a

continuous process of shoring up others’ power, rather than manifesting or
taking care of themselves. They are always fulfilling others -- and ending up
in effect giving themselves away. They have extreme disappointment at not

555
being able to do what they want to do with their life, and at their life
circumstances of the moment.

It comes from a family that put them on a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern

in which they sustained and supported everyone else for meager bare
sustenance maintenance. Meanwhile, their family gave the continuous
message that “They had damn well better be grateful for what they got
because Heaven knows they didn’t deserve it,” and besides, “You are the
cause of all our problems.”

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO LIGHT AND PERCEPTIONS

“See no evil.” They are deeply afraid to see fully what is happening around
them. It arises either out of having had to witness intolerably stressful
events as a child, or out of a severe “Don’t see!” injunction, or both.

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO PAIN

“I KNEW it! -- I’m going to die!” They are prone to emotional

commotional over-reactivity. 90% of the experience of pain is
psychological, in the sense that it is the activation of the midbrain or
emotional center that creates most of the sensation. The physical basis of
pain is primarily in the skin, not in deeper organs, as several inner organs
are insensitive to pain.

Pain is our warning system that something harmful is happening. But after
the initial “shot over the bow,” the vast bulk of the pain experience is in the
interpretations we make of what it means.

Consequently, hypersensitivity to pain represents a generalized dread

“freakout” about life, with associated intense emotional reactions when
something untoward happens. In other words, it is a catastrophizing
anticipation of much more serious outcomes -- all as a function of a rather
pronounced propensity to go to and stay at the “worst case scenario.”

They live in the cellar of existence -- survival issues. They are chronically
fearful and easily alarmed because they have little trust of the Universe.
They therefore over-react to the danger signal of pain with massive amounts

556
of anxiety and implication reactions about what it all means and where it is
all going to go. This, in turn, turns the pain experience into an intolerable
torture.

It is the result of a severely dysfunctional family in which the worst often

DID happen, producing a conditioned calamity expectation process. It is a
pattern that got started in early infancy, when there was very little
protection, sustenance or support.

************************************

“Enough already!” The experience is of “salt in the wound” as a continuous

experience. They feel like life is adding insult to injury, that their
experiential history has been replete with devastation, deprivation and
denigration, and they find the current process entirely too much.

They have undergone much emotional suffering and pragmatic stress in

their life, and they find that being demanded to endure physical pain as well
is the “straw that broke the camel’s back,” and they simply can’t do it.

They are the product of a rather massively guilt-inducing, atonement-

demanding, accusatory and dysfunctional family. They are apt to have been
the “linchpin” for the whole system at the same time, producing a severely
over-responsible and self-blaming, punishment-seeking and success-
avoidant lifestyle. They were systematically wounded on the emotional
capability level in their severely dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Woe is me!” They have a very strong experience of being the “butt of the
Universe,” in the sense of It’s playing “Kick you” with them. They tend to
be quite self-immersed and egocentric, with a pronounced pattern of
complaining and “groan-moaning.” It got started in their severely
dysfunctional family where about the only way they could get any attention
was to play up their injuries and “tragedies.”

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF SENSE OF SMELL

557
“Super-sleuth.” They are super-surveillant and suspicious of their
surroundings as they “sniff out” what lurks under the surface of things. It is
the result of an intensely high stakes and emotionally intense
dysfunctionality in their family.

*************************************

“Ultra-sensitive.” They are super-attuned to the subconscious level of things

and to the subtle biological and emotional underpinnings of human
experience and society. It is a form of intense empathicness that was
selected for this life as an educational and/or contributory process.

It produced a pattern in which they are intensely influenced by other

people’s reactions and feelings. That, in turn, led to their being profoundly
impacted by their family, resulting in a pattern of withdrawing into
themselves.

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO SOUND AND NOISE

“Blackboard-scratch.” They are having a “straw that broke the camel’s

back” reaction to the stimulation and implications of what they are
experiencing. They are sitting on a seething volcano of rage at their whole
life situation, pattern and direction, and they are arriving at the point where
they simply cannot tolerate any more irritations and frustrations.

It is in response to having had to live with the results and ramifications of

having grown up in a highly dysfunctional family who both undermined
their coping capabilities and programmed them to be self-defeating.

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF TASTE

“Princess and the Pea.” They are intensely reactive to the hedonic quality of
everything they experience. The pain/pleasure factor is all-important to
them. They are the product of over-indulgent “keep ‘em around the old
homestead” parenting or of “special” treatment in super-self-immersed
family.

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO TEMPERATURE -- COLD

558
“Freezing to death.” They feel utterly “alone on their own” in an ungiving
and uncaring world, and that having to cope with physical coldness on top
of it is just too much. Their underlying assumption is that they somehow
deserve this experience -- a fact they do not wish to be reminded of with
further forms coldness in their life.

It got started in a severely emotionally depriving very early environment,

and they have continued to have the experience of being in a cold, cruel
world.

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO TEMPERATURE -- HOT

“Hot under the collar.” They must live with a great deal of resentment-rage,
and they find it very difficult to deal with further increases in body
temperature as a result. It is a pattern that started in a dysfunctional or
otherwise unimpactable negative family system, so they had to just sit there
at take it.

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF TOUCH

“Don’t touch me!” They have extreme boundary problems, and they are
intensely “gun-shy” around any form of physical contact. They have no
trust and little capacity to tolerate closeness of any kind. It arises out of
highly invasive parenting, often of a subtle but subterraneanly rapacious
and sex-ploitative nature.

HYPER-SOMNIA (Constant sleepiness or sleep attacks)

“Escape hatch.” They want to escape their life and/or they are bored to
death with their life. It comes from having had to “sleepwalk” their way
through their childhood, because their family would not let them be
themselves. Now they find they can’t “wake up and smell the coffee.”

HYPER-TENSION (High blood pressure)

“Look out!” They have a feeling of being threatened in some vague but
very important high stakes manner, with a resulting intense sense of
endangerment. They feel ready for virtually anything to happen. There is

559
stress and conflict, shocks and tension in their situation. It is the result of a
long-standing emotional problem that hasn’t been worked out, a deep
resentment over the past that is eating at them. They come from an
unpredictably violating dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Seething rage.” They are intensely angry and resentful about just
everything. They have a great deal of suppressed rage and hostility over the
felt external control of their lives. They are afraid of their anger, and they
feel that they can’t handle it, so they stuff it. They suppress their negative
emotions with intimates for fear of hurting their loved ones.

They tend to be over-compliant and anger-avoidant to mask their intense

feelings of betrayal-rage. They are bitterly negative about everyone and
everything, and they always have been. They are a seething volcano who
“makes mountains out of molehills.” They grew up in a hostile and severely
dysfunctional patriarchal family.

*************************************

“Going down.” They are severely depressed and demoralized, and they are
giving up on life. They feel powerless regarding their situation and with
respect to their coping capability. They feel that their situation is hopeless,
and they are throwing in the towel. They are the product of a devastatingly
dysfunctional family who undermined all possible out routes.

*************************************

“Sealed unit.” They are hyper-self-responsible, and they feel that they can’t
count on anyone or anything. They feel they have to do it all themselves.
They have an abiding inability to relax, they tend to overeat and to be over-
weight.

Their love nature is uninvolved and reserved for only a few. They won’t
allow themselves to feel love, affection or compassion for many, and they
operate with highly conditional love habits.

560
They have never had a childhood, and they were never given the message
that who they are is enough, and that what they accomplished filled the bill.
They were effectively “abandoned at an early age” and left more or less to
their own devices throughout childhood, resulting in a “sealed unit self-
made person”

*************************************

“Perfection-expecting.” They have a profoundly frightening dread of failure

that was produced by their parents making them into an “ego extension” --
“vicarious accomplisher” for them. They are tremendously parent-admiring,
especially of their father.

They are an “achieve-aholic” hard-driving competitor for paternal

validation. They are a “workaholic” -- “number-addict” and “coup-seeker”
who wants to “make a killing,” and they are perfectionistically disappointed
in themselves.

*************************************

“This is MY show!” They won’t accept help or delegate responsibility, and

they are an aggressive dominator, with a deep need to be in control, arising
from an underlying dependent passivity and fear of domination. They have
an underlying deep distrust of the universe, and they feel that they have to
personally determine everything; less all hell will break loose. They were
the “sane one” in their severely dysfunctional and patriarchal family.

*************************************

“I’m all I’ve got -- and one strike and I’m out!” They are spirituality-
denigrating and love-suppressing, and at base they are shy, with a poor sex
adjustment, as they seek satisfaction within themselves only.

They are anxious about money, they are time-urgent, they are insecure
about life, and they are stress-sensitive. They are impatient, angry, and
wanting to live life in the moment, as they try to pound away too quickly at
life. All of which arises from their having had to take on their parent(s)
ambitions for them from far too early an age.

561
HYPER-THYROIDISM (Over-active thyroid gland)

“Shining light.” There is a felt need to perform, contribute and be creative,

and to be a source of continuous inspiration to others. So they are
compulsively communicative, excessively expressive, and manic-frantically
driven.

They were put on contradictory conditions for love as a child -- to super-

succeed and yet to never grow away. They vacillate between meeting this
awesome criterion, in a constantly agitated hyper-active performance
pattern.

*************************************

“Perform -- or else!” They are desperately afraid they will lose something
or someone they love, in a frenetic abandonment-anxiety pattern. They feel
that they have to super-perform for their “love-line.” They are engaged in a
panicky effort to speed up in order to prevent the anticipated catastrophic
loss.

There are underlying profound feelings of non-deservingness of love, there

is a tremendously over-developed sense of responsibility and a co-
dependent care-taking compulsion. They are the product of a severely
conditionally loving family in which they had to constantly “earn” their
love.

*************************************

“Rejection-rage.” There is a tremendous anger at being left out, and being

made to feel that they have to constantly contribute and to suppress their
own needs. This drives them to a huge output of activity and energy, in a
frantic/manic effort to meet criteria and to deflect rejection. They were
required to be the “linchpin” for their severely dysfunctional and rejecting
neglecting family.

HYPER-VENTILATION (Excessive inhalation)

562
“Freaked out intake.” They are in the grips of a generalized fear and dread,
and of a deep distrust of the process of the Universe. There is great
resistance to change and newness, and they hate life’s unpredictability,
uncertainty and requirements. They have a tremendous underlying self-
rejection generated by a frighteningly dysfunctional and shame-inducing
family.

HYPO-GLYCEMIA (Insufficient blood sugar)

“What’s the use?” They feel overwhelmed by the requirements of life, and
by what they feel are their excessive burdens. They feel that there is an
insufficient input of support, nurturance and resources. Or they feel there is
no allowance for such input, with the result that they are drained dry and
“running on empty.” Their experience is that “There is no joy in
Bloodville.”

There is an attitude of nihilistic resignation that got started in childhood in

an overwhelmingly dysfunctional family, in which they were the ones that
had to hold the ship together “with spit and bailing wire,” while being told
they were the only one who had to do so because they were a “moral cretin”
who had to “atone.”

HYPO-SENSITIVITY TO PAIN

“What, me worry?” They are severely denial-dominated and reality-

avoidant as a result of having grown up in a family in which that was
massively demanded and enforced. There is often a great deal of repressed
rage under their pseudo-serenity -- the “Alfred E. Newman” of “Mad
Magazine” fame trip.

**************************************

“The Machine.” They are intensely determined to not be done in or “over-

come” by any form of vulnerability or “weakness.” It is a matter of “life
and death” to them. This pattern arose out of their feeling utterly alone on
their own and/or feeling that they were the “buck stops here” person in their
family. It was due to being regarded as an inconvenience and/or as the
“family hoist” who held up the whole system, like the garage rack.

563
HYPO-TENSION (Low blood pressure)

“Eeyore.” They are experiencing a “What’s the use? It won’t work anyway”
demoralized defeatism resulting in a giving up on life and in a “settle-for”
lifestyle. There is a feeling of purposelessness, along with a letting go of a
sense of meaningfulness, both of which reflect a subconscious death wish.
There is also a good deal of anxiety, insecurity and frustration that have led
to their becoming nihilistic. They have withdrawn their energy from the
process of living.

Their family was completely unable to give them any love or hope, due to
their being intensely nihilistic and pessimistic. The individual ended up
feeling that there’s really no point and no winning in this business of life, so
they are marking time and “waiting for rigor mortis” as they have the
feeling, “There must be some way out of here.”

**********************************

“Keeping things afloat -- at their own expense.” They tend to get into a
sacrificial pattern, followed by unconscious deep-seated resentment. It all
got started in a family who operated in the same manner and simultaneously
demanded that they be the “pillar of strength,” and the one who tries to keep
things together and cleans up the mess. Theirs was a loveless and joyless
“Cinderella/Cinderfella” family experience.

HYPO-THALAMUS PROBLEMS (The governing gland for the pituitary

and pineal glands -- the endocrine gland/orchestrators)

“Emotionally devastated.” They are overwhelmed with anxiety, insecurity,

frustration, resentment-rage, disgust, grief and despair. They feel that there
is no point or possibility of continuing. They are the product of a massively
demoralizingly dysfunctional family who in effect derailed any and all hope
of a workable life.

HYPO-THYMUS PROBLEMS (Under-activity of the thymus gland)

“I have no right.” They are having difficulty with their desires, arising out
of a generalized shame and guilt over having needs, wants and wishes.

564
They are convinced that not only do they not deserve to have requirements,
they actually cause the environment harm by doing so.

It is a pattern that got started in an extremely self-immersed, exploitative,

blaming and shame-inducing family.

HYPO-THYROIDISM (Insufficient secretion of the life-sustaining growth

hormone)

“Giving up the ghost.” They are manifesting stagnation, lethargy, ennui and
nihilism. They have a hopeless and defeatist personality, with a felt
uselessness of effort and an obsessive rumination about how nothing ever
works. They are given to intense pessimism, demoralization, and a feeling
of being hopelessly stifled, all of which result in their “throwing in the
towel.”

It is the result of a thoroughly defeating dysfunctional family. It is also

indicative of past life issues that have to be worked out.

HYSTERECTOMY (Removal of the uterus)

“She-jection.” There is intense repudiation of their femininity and creative

powers. They feel it is not safe for them to manifest their creativity or their
generativity. They fear rejection, abandonment and attack, along with envy,
jealousy and retaliation. It got started with a severely ambivalent mother
who was also envious and possessively engulfing.

*************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” There is a strong streak of fear of their going out of

control, and they are self-suppressing and fearful of their personal power. It
arises from their “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything with
three legs), their patriarchy-paranoia, and their father-fury.

They are systematically self-denigrating and ashamed of their feminine

role, situation and nature. They don’t want to release their creativity for fear
of exploitation by the patriarchy as well. They have a strong “Take this job

565
and shove it!” feeling and they would just as soon “take their marbles and
go home.”

It is the result of a direct infusion of self-rejection and “tripod-rage” from

their mother, with subsequent intense experiential validation from their
father’s behavior and from the patriarchal society.

Section 8

566
567
H

254

568
569
H

255

256

257

258

259

260

261

262

570
263

264

265

266

267

268

269

270

271

571
272

273

274

275

276

277

278

279

572
280

281

282

283

284

285

286

287

288

573
289

290

291

292

293

294

295

296

574
297

298

299

575
IATROGENIC ILLNESS (Caused by treatment procedures -- e.g., staph
infections, antibiotic reactions, surgical problems, medication side effects,
chemotherapy effects, drug side effects, etc.)

“Parental violation -- repeated.” They are manifesting their underlying

unconscious expectation of being betrayed and invaded. It arose from a
childhood experience of being repeatedly violated by their dysfunctional
and self-serving family.

Their experience now is that they are still feeling the effects of destructive
and self-sabotage-inducing “implants” from their invasive family. They also
find that the environment has a way of reproducing their home environment
-- complete with all the destructive invasions and violations.

I.L.C. [Idiopathic Lympho-Cytopenia -- an AIDS-like pattern without

H.I.V.] (See ACQUIRED IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME)

ILEITIS (Inflammation of the opening to the large intestine)

“Freaked out.” They have a lot of worry about not being good enough,
along with a fearfulness about what that might bring. There is much self-
disapproval and insecurity generated by a capability-undermining and
shame-inducing family.

***************************************

“Resentful resignation.” They have the feeling that things are not going to
get any better. The trouble is, thing suck, as far as they are concerned, and
they are very angry about that. It got started in their implacably
dysfunctional family, in which they could do nothing to improve things.

ILEOCECAL VALVE PROBLEMS (Leading to back-flow of fecal matter

from the large to small intestines)

“Self-poisoning.” They hold on to old patterns in a rigid and self-

destructive manner. They are refusing to let go of the past and of rancorous

576
bitterness, and they are taking a highly conservative approach to things.
They are the product of a highly authoritarian household.

IMMUNE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“What’s the use?” They are harboring deep grief and a sense of underlying
despair and demoralization. They have a demoralized resignation attitude in
the making or in their manifestation. They are overwhelmed by too much
sorrow, and by the “running on empty” effect of a severe inequality of
energy exchange with the world, whereby they put out much more than they
get. They have effectively given up on life, feeling that they have no ability
to determine or control anything. They feel that they are just simply
insufficient to the cause, and they can’t care anymore.

It is a result of having carried the world on their shoulders all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family, with little or no ability to receive or
to request or to require a return in kind. They were told in effect they were
the source of all the family’s problems while actually being the only one
deflecting some of the disasters.

IMPETIGO (Contagious virus-based skin lesions)

“Why me?” They have the feeling that they are being in effect “singled out
for shit” by the “Home Office” (All that Is). They are the product of an
abusive, rejecting and dysfunctional family who did indeed single them out.

***************************************

“Despair-rage.” They are experiencing a great deal of inner anger at the

way that their life is going, and they have a pronounced sense of
helplessness to do anything about it. They feel trapped in a careening truck
that is heading for the cliff, and they are utterly and desperately infuriated
by the whole situation. So much so that it is creating a skin-burn.

It is the result of a highly possessive, engulfing and yet simultaneously

rejecting and punitive dysfunctional and oppressive family.

***************************************

577
“JAP-out” (Jeweled American Prince(ss)). There is an intense internal
conflict going on between wanting to please everyone at any cost and a
“whim of iron” that wants everything to go exactly their way.

It is a result of having become their mother’s “special relationship,” in

which she indulged them profusely, but in which she also demanded they be
totally there for her. The resulting internal conflict generates so much cell
electricity that it literally burns the skin. (See the areas of the body affected
for more information)

IMPOTENCE

“Walk-out.” It is a manifestation of an “I’m not interested in this

relationship because it is just not meeting my needs” message and/or
experience (though not necessarily the reality of the situation). They don’t
want to surrender to a woman. It’s based primarily on fear of and rage at
their mother, possibly accompanied by spite against their former mate(s).

***************************************

“Sexual shut-down.” There is a great deal of grief, felt rejection, fear of loss
and confusion that is permeating their relationship at present. There is also
the possibility of their seeking to gain power by withholding sexuality from
their partner. Sometimes it reflects intense stress and/or pressure in their
life. It is the result of an intense abandonment-anxiety and castration-
anticipation in reaction to felt sexual performance pressures.

***************************************

“Sexual shame.” There is a pronounced sense of inadequacy, guilt and

tension in the sexual arena that was generated by excessive self-
expectations based on social beliefs and maternal intrusions and demands.
The result is that they in effect “go numb,” and they can’t “keep it up.”

They had to be “Mommy’s little man,” often in a sex-ploitative manner,

while simultaneously being subjected to engulfing and ensnaring mothering
and her intense “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything with

578
three legs). The result is a mother-fixation in which he is unable to truly
connect, commit, be passionate or be vulnerable.

INABILITY TO ABSORB NUTRIENTS

“Forget the whole damned thing!” There is a simultaneous profound self-

rejection and distrust of the Universe. Their experience is that anything the
environment has to offer is going to be “poison apples” because “that’s all
they can expect.” It is the result either of some sort of karmic issue or of
extreme rejection and accusation by their family or both.

INABILITY TO COMMUNICATE MEANING (Meandering, pointless

speech)

“Meaning-avoidance.” They grew up in a severely denial-dominated

household, and they learned early on that significance and truth were to be
avoided like the plague. They assiduously attempted to conform to this
requirement/injunction, but life has gotten too intense and demanding for
them to continue to do so anymore. So they began losing their ability to
keep the “wolves of awareness” away from their door.

As a result, they have broken down completely in the meaning-

communication sphere, as a last desperate strategy to avoid what they
anticipate would be the “Cosmically calamitous” outcome of confronting
the Truth.

INABILITY TO COMPREHEND SPEECH

“Tuning out.” They are ignoring the environment and verbal inputs, because
such inputs are either traumatic, associated with trauma, or inconsistent
with what have been found to be more reliable nonverbal indicators of true
feelings and intents by their care-takers.

They come from a family where what was said did not match reality and
where “what you see is not necessarily what you get.”

***************************************

579
“I’m not listening!” They are manifesting a refusal to be influenced by or to
take inputs from their care-takers due to rage at their treatment. They may
be developing a control-avoidant, rebellious and/or authority-freak
approach. They come from a severely dysfunctional family in which there
was a great deal of passive-aggressiveness.

INABILITY TO CRY (Emotional)

“What, me worry?” It is an intense feeling-avoidance based on profound

vulnerability-anxiety and fear of being out of control. They have a deep
distrust of the Universe and other people. It is due to severely dysfunctional
and dependently demanding parenting and/or a massively repressive and
denial-dominated dysfunctional family and/or a severely male role-
enforcing family.

INABILITY TO CRY (Genetic)

“Karmic re-balance.” They are operating under the requirement for a

rectification for having been intensely repressive, oppressive, suppressive,
and femininity-purse cutting in former lives. The lesson is the importance
of fluid flowingness, vulnerable involvement, and compassionate
comprehension.

INABILITY TO DISCERN EMOTIONS

“Feeling-phobia.” They were so devastatingly but super-subtly trained to

avoid awareness of the emotions as a child that it has resulted in a
breakdown of the physical system for doing so. They come from a severely
denial-dominated and/or repressive dysfunctional family in which any
contact with what people were really feeling would have resulted in a
calamitous collapse of the whole family.

INABILITY TO FORM BLOOD CLOTS

“Drain out.” They have serious boundary problems, and they feel that they
have to care-take the world. They were never allowed to have their own
needs met or to have limits on the demands that were made of them. It was
the ultimate co-dependency pattern. At the soul level, this situation was

580
chosen as a karma payback, an experience-expansion, or an example-
provider.

INABILITY TO FORM WORDS

“Struck dumb.” Life has been so inhospitable that they can’t find words to
express their experience. They comprehend much more than those around
them can handle and/or they were given a very strong “to be seen but not
heard from” message as a child.

In any case, it is an annihilation-anxiety and/or a world-destruction fear that

was instilled by the fact that there was a gross mismatch between what they
experienced/perceived/knew and what their family could tolerate hearing
about and there was a very strongly threatening response to their attempts to
speak their truth.

INABILITY TO PERCEIVE THINGS

“I don’ wanna know!” They are manifesting an information-avoidant

approach. It was generated by a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional
family in which it was disastrous to perceive what was really going down. It
was literally “world destruction” for them to comprehend what was
happening to, within and around them.

INABILITY TO PHONETICALLY SOUND OUT WORDS

“Ball and stick problem.” They are too concerned with pragmatic survival
to pay attention to the abstract world -- including whether the ball or the
stick comes first (the difference between a “d” and a “b”).

They were left to their own devices emotionally and/or physically as an

infant and child, and the result are that they never had the leisure or the
stimulation to develop their symbolic perception function adequately. The
result is a developmental deprivation effect that results in difficulty in
learning to associate sounds with symbols. (See DYSLEXIA)

INABILITY TO PRODUCE MILK (Nursing)

581
“Subtle selfishness.” She is experiencing rather intense ambivalence about
motherhood. She has a lot of resentment of the demands and drains of
mothering, and she is subconsciously looking to the infant for the
succorance she never got. It’s a case of not being able to do for others what
was never done for her. The key factor here is the nurturing attitude was
missing, regardless of the history of breast or bottle feeding.

***************************************

“Ostracism-fear.” She has a strong fear of rejection and abandonment

because of her having become an “asexual object” for her family. This arose
out of a “romancing the stone” relationship with her father, in which he was
very conditional in his functioning with her so that she got the loud and
clear message that she is acceptable ONLY IF...

***************************************

“Not YOU!” She has an ambivalent or rejecting attitude towards this

particular infant, as a function of a clash between the infant’s characteristics
and the mother’s life history and dynamics and/or because of the
circumstances surrounding this child’s being in her life.

INABILITY TO RECOGNIZE FACES

“Who am I?” They have been forced to the realization they have never
effectively formed an identity/destiny of their own. They were either
prevented from doing so as a function of being born with this disorder (in
which case it is a karmic or special experience destiny) or by being required
to become a chameleon by their demanding, domineering and dysfunctional
family.

***************************************

“Who are you?” They are overwhelmed, outclassed and in over their head
with their important people, and they have “pulled the plug” on having to
meet the requirements of being in relationship. They are the product of an
extremely severely emotionally abusive and draining family.

582
INABILITY TO SLEEP

“Red-orange alert.” They are on intense vigilance and “hair-trigger”

reactivity. They don’t dare to relax because they don’t trust the process of
life. They have a disturbed mental condition, due to a subconscious shock
and/or due to their being in a chronic state of “red-orange alert.”

There has now also been an “emergency preparation” activated by current

circumstances. They labor under a great deal of guilt and fear over
imagined failures and their consequences. It arises from their having been
the “sane one” in a severely dysfunctional family.

INABILITY TO SMELL

“Anhedonism.” It is a manifestation of the inability to experience or value

pleasure. It is a karma-paying or experience-expanding decision by the soul
to cut off the ego from the primary grounding and orienting sense, as well
as from the major source of aesthetic experiences.

***************************************

“No discernment.” They have an inability to “smell a rat” or to tell that

“something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.” It is the result of a highly
collusive and denial-dominated dysfunctional family who required that the
individual to not look below the surface of things, and to not tap into their
intuition and subconscious perceptivity.

INABILITY TO SNEEZE

“Grief-suppression.” It can happen temporarily, as in a situation where the

individual is afraid to mourn due to external situational factors, or it can be
chronic due to internal emotional factors.

In either case, it represents a pronounced resistance to sadness or to the

acknowledgment of sadness as an emotion, due to anticipated dire
consequences associated with contacting sadness. It was generated by a
family who was denial-dominated, dysfunctional and repressive.

583
 ***************************************

“Grief-avoidance.” This can represent past life holdovers and/or a learning

history in which it was highly traumatic to access grief. It often reflects
severe underlying depression or fragmented ego development.

When it is a chronic condition, it reflects a severe self-rejection and the

feeling that they have absolutely no right to mourn, as if they would be
“wallowing in self-pity.” This, in turn, is the result of intensely depriving
and denigrating treatment from their family to the accompaniment of “You
asked for it, asshole!” messages in large doses.

INABILITY TO SPEAK; INABILITY TO TALK

“Speak no evil.” They are in the process of karma-paying for negative

utilization of the capacity for speech in their past lives. They are “making
an inspirational point” with their handling of their situation, as in the case
of Helen Keller.

***************************************

“Seen but not heard.” Their family system was so destructive that it made it
very clear to them that to speak out about anything that was going on was
the occasion for annihilation and/or world-destruction.

INABILITY TO SWALLOW

“Poison apple reaction.” The feeling is that nothing can be trusted to be

what it appears to be, and that everything is potentially dangerous. They
can’t accept anything at face value, and they won’t swallow anything
without a thorough checkout. It arises from an intensely untrustworthy
formative environment.

INABILITY TO TASTE

“Repressive shut-down.” They are self-protectively into intensity-

avoidance, predictability-addiction, and self-suppression. They have a deep-
seated fear of the unknown and the unexpected arising from an annihilation-

584
anxiety-inducing childhood in which it was never clear when and whether
the end would come.

***************************************

“Balancing the moral budget.” They are paying past karma for over-
indulgence or utter immersion in the realm of the senses and in hedonic
pleasures.

INABILITY TO URINATE

“Pissed off.” They are intensely angry at their life, and they are looking for
who is responsible for it. They feel betrayed and victimized, especially by
their intimates of the other gender. They feel the parent of the other gender
is the cause of all their problems. Underneath all this, they have the uneasy
feeling that they are really getting their “just desserts.”

This whole pattern came about as a result of their being sexualized and sex-
ploitative in a seductive-destructive and guilt-inducing manner in a severely
dysfunctional family.

INABILITY TO WALK

“Teetering instability.” They are suffering from scattered thinking,

distractible trains of thought, not being centered cognitively. They feel
thrown off-base, with no sense of safety, in a kind of fearful drivenness.
They are “desperately seeking Susan” in an attempt to gain some sense of
stability.

They are therefore always on the lookout for the “greener grass,” and they
are continuously in fear of missing out or of missing the “key element to
things.” As a result, they are often instantly pulled off balance by any
passing stimulus that “might be the critical factor.”

It is the result of a “magical mystery tour” unstable dysfunctional family in

which things never really worked, and in which there was no way to tell
what was really going on. (See BALANCE PROBLEMS; MENIERE’S
DISEASE; PARALYSIS)

585
INCONTINENCE (See “DIARRHEA;” “SPASTIC COLON;” “The
TROTS”)

INCURABLE DISEASES

“Dead end script.” There is lethal programming playing out or an inner

decision by their soul to leave. They are chronically disgusted and judging
of themselves and others in a “No point staying” manner. They utterly
refuse, and they are in effect unable to forgive and forget anything -- they
are a grudge-nurser from way back.

It is usually the result of “Don’t be!” or “If you commit anywhere, you’re
going to die because you have killed me!” scripting. It can’t be cured by
external means, only by going within and re-programming the “bio-
computer,” and then only if their inner soul is willing to continue here.

INDIGESTION

“Stones in the stomach.” The reality they are dealing with and taking in is
causing them upset and disharmony within themselves. It is a
responsibility-overload, leading to tension, fear, dread and anxiety. They are
over-compensating for dependency needs, leading to their frantic pushing of
ideas and projects on themselves and others. They were the “pivot person”
for their family from very early on -- too early for them to handle.

***************************************

“In over their head.” They have conflicting ideas about what would be ego-
enhancing, and as a result, there is an inability to assimilate new
experiences and ideas. They are overwhelmed with fear, excitement and
implication-anxiety. At base, they feel inadequate to the cause, and they are
highly security-seeking and failure-anxious. They were highly conditionally
accepted in their perfectionistic but self-contradictory family.

***************************************

“Grudge-grinding.” They are experiencing considerable resentment, with a

resulting misuse of mind power for critical judgmentalness, griping and

586
grunting, and feeling that others are deliberately trying to cause disruptions.
They feel that the whole world is out to get them and that they have to
defensively combat their way along. This, in turn, generates guilt and more
tension.

It all got started in a dysfunctionally dependent and competitive family

system and they are still living it out.

INDUCED LABOR

“There must be some way out of this!” They are experiencing ambivalence
and/or fear about having a child, or about having this child under these
conditions. It is often due to an early non-supportive early life, to an
“unwelcome wagon” reception at their own birth.

***************************************

“I bit off more than I can chew!” They are experiencing ambivalence and/or
fear about coming into the world at this time, with these parents, or under
these conditions. It’s a “Holy shit! I don’t think I can do this!” moment-of-
truth reaction. It also involves a good deal of resentment-rage over having
the issue forced like this.

INFANTILE PARALYSIS (See POLIO)

INFECTION

“Flare-up.” There is irritation, annoyance and anger arising out of a chronic

resentment of their situation that has now “gone over the top.” There is an
intense inner conflict and generalized hostility has taken on physical form.

They are being stressed by current circumstances, and this has resulted in
their becoming very angry at their lot in life, particularly around the issues
tapped into by their present situation. They are full of annoyance, fury and
suspiciousness about everything that is happening to them at this point. It
got started in a dysfunctional family in which nothing worked right, and
nothing could effectively be done about it. (See the area(s) affected for
more information)

587
INFERTILITY

“In over their head.” They are experiencing great fear and resistance to the
process of life. There is a considerable amount of tension, anxiety,
emotional conflict and traumatic shock involved in their life history. They
are heavily into competence-anxiety, self-distrust and self-inhibition. It
arises from a “blame-throwing” dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Cold-hearted.” It is a case of egotism, selfishness and dishonest feelings

being expressed in an ignorant manner. In effect, they don’t want to be a
parent for all the wrong reasons (or maybe for the right reasons, given who
they are). They are hard, harsh, cold, judgmental, negative assumptive,
angry and blaming. They are manifesting a primitive manner of functioning
learned in a similar family.

***************************************

“Not this time around.” They don’t need to go through the parenting
experience, and they are therefore are unconsciously choosing not to sustain
the procreation process.

***************************************

“Not time yet!” The child’s soul intends to come in, but the circumstances
are not appropriate at the moment, for whatever reason.

***************************************

“Are you kidding?!” They have had a long-standing pattern of monastic

celibacy in past lives, and they intend to continue the tradition.

***************************************

“Karma.” They have a past life history of severe abuse and even murder of
children. They are being required to work off that karma before they will be
allowed to parent again.

588
 ***************************************

“More than one way to skin a cat.” The parents are destined to express their
generativity in other ways that would prevent, derail or distort proper
parenting.(See MISCARRIAGE)

INFLAMMATION

“Flame-throwing.” They are caught up in inflamed thinking, and they are

fearfully enraged and “seeing red.” There is also intense implication-
anxiety and implication-anger about everything that is going on in their life.

The experience is of being beset on all sides by inexorable and continuously

irritating and threatening forces. They also have the experience of
constantly “shooting themselves in the foot,” and they are disapproving of
and disgusted with themselves.

It all got started in a dysfunctional family in which things were always in an

uproar and nothing worked very well. (See the area(s) affected for more
information also, see INFECTION)

INFLAMMATION OF THE ABDOMINAL CAVITY LINING

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are fed up with the
“slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” They have a deep-seated
resentment of their lot in life, the hard knocks they have experienced (or are
experiencing).

They feel they have assimilated far more than their share of negativity, and
they are putting up a protective shield of vulnerability-and involvement-
avoidance as a result. It reflects an underlying distrust of the Universe
generated by a “poison apple”-dispensing dysfunctional family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE BONES

“Asleep at the wheel Up There.” They have a good deal of fear, anger and
frustration with the very structure of the Universe, and with the

589
fundamental nature of life. They feel totally unsupported with no sense of
safety.

It is a continuation of a feeling they have had all their life, starting in a

depriving infancy and childhood in a dysfunctional family where they had
to be the tower of power, the “Rock of Gibraltar,” the “pillar of strength,”
the “family hoist.”

INFLAMMATION OF THE BRAIN

“God is Al Capone!” They are enraged at the Universe for the “dirty end of
the stick” that they have gotten since the beginning. They have always felt
like a misfit, that they somehow don’t belong here. As a result, their needs
have not been met, and they in turn have been unable to fit in. They feel
totally betrayed by the “Home Office” (All that Is).

It is the result of their having gotten a lot of “You don’t belong here!”
messages from the environment. It all got started in their dysfunctional and
exploitative yet severely wrong-making family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE CHEEK(S)

“Get out of my face!” They have a fulminating fury about having to

suppress their emotional experiences and expressions. Yet they are too
inhibited to express it directly. It is the result of an oppressive and
accusative family.

RIGHT CHEEK

“Conformity-rage.” They have intense irritation over how they have to

persona-project, and about how they have to suppress their feelings with
other people.

LEFT CHEEK

“Moral cretin.” There are deep issues of self-rejection and self-rage over
their having “unacceptable” feelings and emotions. (See CHEEK
PROBLEMS)

590
INFLAMMATION OF THE HAIR ROOTS

“Moral outrage.” They feel that things have gotten completely beyond
tolerance. They tend to be hardheaded and closed-minded, and they are
incensed by the direction things are taking. They set very high standards,
and feel that they have to have “hands on” control or things won’t be done
right. At the same time, though, there is also an underlying self-distrust and
self-disgust, because they feel that they don’t live up to proper performance.

It is the result of having had to be the “buck stops here” person in their
conservative patriarchal family, and they have had to take on too much
responsibility ever since.

HOT TUB FOLLICULITIS (Bacteria-caused hair follicle inflammation

passed on through the hot tub environment)

“Self-anger.” They are anywhere from annoyed to furious (the degree being
reflected in the severity of the symptoms) at themselves for having needs,
wants, desires and sensuous requirements.

These were am strengsten verboten (most strictly forbidden) when they

were growing up. They are the product of a “seduce-slap”
repressive/suppressive, subconsciously tantalizingly sex-ploitative and
resentfully rejecting family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE MAMMARY GLAND(S)

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are experiencing

inflamed thinking, and they are fearfully enraged and “seeing red.” There is
intense implication-anxiety and implication-anger. The feeling is that they
are being beset on all sides by inexorable and continuously irritating and
threatening forces. They are the product of an implacably dysfunctional and
infuriating family.

***************************************

“Shooting themselves in the foot.” They experience constantly getting in

their own way, and they are disapproving of and disgusted with themselves.

591
The issues revolve around their maternal manifestation, their sexual
attractiveness, and their femininity, along with the role and nature of love in
their life. They feel boundary-invaded, exploited and patriarchally harassed.

It all started in an exploitative dysfunctional family in which things were

always in an uproar, where nothing worked very well, and in which they
were the “sane one” and their only source of feminine resources.

***************************************

“Infernal maternal.” They have intense conflicts over their maternal

attitudes, home, and motherhood. They feel unable or unwilling to be
loving, nurturing and supportive, due to never having been nurtured or due
to having the maternal denigrated in their family.

OR they feel exploited, unappreciated and oppressed in response to a

patriarchal environment. OR They are over -nurturing, self-denying and
insufficiently nourished, refusing to nourish themselves and putting
everyone else first, as a function of having had to do so as a child.

***************************************

“Erotic issues.” There are conflicts over their sexual attractiveness, their
sexuality, their seductive projection and/or their erotic sensitivity and
receptivity. They feel insufficiently feminine or attractive, due to devaluing
by their family.

OR they feel sex-ploitative, and they deeply resent it, as a function of

having encountered such treatment a lot in their family. OR there is a
significant case of “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything with
three legs) arising from a patriarchal family, from a dysfunctional father,
and/or from maternal programming.

***************************************

“Female competence concerns.” They are enmeshed in conflicts over their

femininity. They feel “masculine” or “unfeminine” because of strong
forcefulness of personality or because of devaluation by their family.

592
OR They feel too feminine, in the sense of feeling like a second class
citizen, because they were treated as such at home. OR They feel powerless
and unable to cope with life on their own two feet, and they resent it. It is a
pattern which came from being competence-undermined and power-
prevented as a child.

***************************************

“Love questions.” They have conflicts over the role of love in their life.
They feel unable to “be loving” as a result of never having been loved
themselves. OR they feel that “love is a poison apple,” because that’s what
it was as a child. OR they are starved for love, and they are not finding it
because they imprinted on unloving people. OR they feel they don’t deserve
love as a result of a severely shaming and denigrating family.

RIGHT MAMMARY GLAND

“Conformity-demand resentment.” They have a lot of anger over the

world’s reaction to their preferred forms, means of expressing and/or
recipients of nurturance, sexuality-expression or love.

LEFT MAMMARY GLAND

“Emotional deprivation.” They are angry over their felt inability to manifest
their preferred sources of nurturance, sexuality or love. OR They have
issues over felt deservingness of nurturance, sexual support or expression
and/or love and caring.

INFLAMMATION OF THE MASTOIDS (The bone behind the ear)

“Tuning out.” They have an intense desire not to hear the hostility, conflict
and aggression that is going on around them (it usually occurs in children).
Their fear is infecting their understanding, and their anger and frustration
with the situation has become acute.

It is, of course, the result of a dysfunctional family, in which their needs are
often overlooked or belittled, or in which their needs become the grounds
for blame and accusation.

593
RIGHT MASTOID

“Implication-anxiety.” There is much fear and anger over the indications for
future developments of the hostility in their environment.

LEFT MASTOID

“Abuse-resentment.” They have much fear and anger over the treatment
that they are receiving, and its implications for their future.

INFLAMMATION OF THE PALATE

“Life sucks!” They have intense resentment of their lot in life. They do not
find what has been dealt to them at all to their taste. They feel they should
be experiencing a far more palatable fare, and they find their whole
situation totally distasteful.

It is the result of their being over-indulged in a highly dysfunctional family,

leading to elevated expectations and continuously disappointing servings.

INFLAMMATION OF THE RETINA

“Outraged witness.” They are inflamed by what they are seeing going down
around them. They feel powerless to do anything about it, and they find the
whole situation utterly enraging. It is highly reminiscent of their severely
infuriatingly dysfunctional family background.

INFLAMMATION OF THE STOMACH LINING

“Over-burdened.” There has been prolonged uncertainty about how things

are going to come out, along with a pronounced feeling of doom and
disaster in the making. They also have an inability to say “No” to demands,
with the result that they “sell themselves out.”

It’s due to a fear of rejection and abandonment, with an associated grief,

despair, guilt and self-disapproval about the loss of their “self-values.” They
are a perfectionistic workaholic who is trapped in inescapable
overwhelming responsibilities in which they are expected to “do the

594
impossible with nothing.” They are the product of perfectionistic,
judgmental, wrong-making and extremely demanding parents.

INFLAMMATION OF THE TONSILS

“I don’t have the right.” They have a strong belief that they can’t speak up
for themselves or ask for their needs. They believe that they don’t deserve
to have their needs met or to seek any form of gratification. They have an
“atonement” approach to life. It is the result of an oppressive and shame-
inducing family.

INHALING SOMETHING FROM THE ATMOSPHERE AROUND

THEM

“It’s in the air.” They are finding that they are surrounded by a fouled
atmosphere. It is a symbol for the contaminated environment they had as a
child, and its purpose is to precipitate a decision not to take in anymore
“poisoned air” in their life, or to believe that they deserve such an
experience anymore.

INHALING SOMETHING DOWN THE WRONG TUBE

“Choking to death.” They are “going down the tubes” on their own guilt
and shame. They feel they should be thoroughly punished or even destroyed
for their “sins.”

It comes from a severely accusatory, blame-throwing, moralistic and

punitive family. They are being forcefully made aware that it was the nature
of their formative process, not of their nature, so that they never “swallow”
that kind of thing again.

CHOKING TO DEATH ON WHAT THEY INHALED

“Time to leave.” They had the feeling that they had completed what they
could do here, and they felt they had nothing more to do -- so they left. It
was a destiny completion reaction.

***************************************

595
“I can’t keep up.” They felt utterly overwhelmed by life and by their
circumstances, and had the feeling that there is no way in which they could
meet the demands being made of them or in which they could realize their
destiny, due to circumstances beyond their control.

It was a re-appearance of an experience that once was the “warp and woof”
of their life, but it reached the point where they feel they simply didn’t have
what it takes to make it and/or that there was simply no point in continuing.
They were the product of a highly nihilistic and pessimistic parenting
pattern.

***************************************

“I should leave.” They were experiencing a resurgence of very early self-

rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong
making, and rejecting maternal parenting, only this time they decided she
was right, and they took the ultimate step.

***************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

INHIBITED ORGASM -- FEMALE

“Can’t come.” It reflects either a generalized repressive family system

and/or a specific programming against sexual passion by one or both
possessive parents.

INHIBITED ORGASM -- MALE

“Won’t go off.” They can’t “come” inside a woman. It is the result of

possessive and probably sex-ploitative maternal parenting.

INJURIES

596
“BAD boy/girl!” They are engaged in self-punishment arising out of guilt
and anger at themselves that leads to the notion that they deserve to suffer.
It is frustration with the world turned in on themselves, because they feel
they don’t have the right to express their anger outward.

It also reflects an underlying self-shame and self-rejection generated by a

denigrating and blame-throwing family.

INNER EAR PROBLEMS

“Inner misdirectedness.” They are finding themselves engaged in self-

deluding, disoriented, and/or misguided self-regulation. They are “missing
the mark” rather consistently and they are increasingly agitated about it. It
reflects a re-prioritizing and re-evaluation of their life direction and
manifestation. The underlying cause is a self-misleading self-direction
system implanted at an early age by a possessive and simultaneously
rejecting family.

RIGHT INNER EAR PROBLEMS

“Self-misleading.” They are engaged in self-misdirection in the manner in

which they manage their life and in which they make interventions. They
feel have “the right formula” for every situation -- only it isn’t really right.

LEFT INNER EAR PROBLEMS

“Self-deluding.” They are reality-redefining in a manner that is detrimental

to their functioning. They are bound to beliefs learned early in their family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE INNER EAR

“Angrily self-misguiding.” They are very disturbed with, agitated about and
resentful of their situation in life. As a result, they are interpreting things
from an anger distorted orientation that gets them into trouble. They are the
product of a competence-undermining and self-sabotage-inducing
dysfunctional family.

INSANITY

597
“Lost in space.” This is a situation in which there is too large a mismatch
between the Higher Self and the ego capabilities. There is an overload of
Universal energy and Cosmic consciousness for their ego in this life to
handle.

The result is that the Higher Self can’t help them in mental processing, due
to unfinished past life stuff, and that leads to things like fetal malformation,
severe physiological limitations or overwhelm, etc., in reaction to the
difficult and hostile training environment they chose for their purposes in
this life. They have lost or were never able to make connection with the
“Home Office” (All that Is).

They end up driven from the pragmatic world, and they are consequently
stuck in the dysfunctionality and despair of their past lives, for whatever
purposes.

***************************************

“Distorted perceptions.” They have much confusion and delusion about

what’s happening which is generated by perceptual distortions and disorders
created by their severely dysfunctional family. It is reflective of an inability
to handle the demands of consensual reality and of pragmatic coping
generated by intensely confusing strongly ambivalent parenting very early
in life, so that the perceptual/conceptual processes are prevented from
developing effectively. It also often involves a body that is genetically
restricted in its ability to handle stress.

***************************************

“Shattered, scattered ego.” The contents of their experiences reflect the

rejection at a very early age. They have no idea who they really are, and
their identity is thoroughly fragmented. Their operational ego is a shambles,
and it is highly primitive in its nature. They have an inability to disengage
from their early formative period and its events.

They have settled upon a violent separation and a thorough-going

withdrawal from life, in a totally giving up in the face of overwhelming
odds. Escapism, withdrawal and the desire to run from their family are the

598
result. It is the result of a cognitively confusing, severely ambivalent and
intensely dysfunctional and operational ego-devastating family.

***************************************

“Past life processing.” It reflects a life goal of re-evaluation in which they

seek to process the meanings and implications of the last several lives. The
soul chooses to have this experience for purposes of consolidating and
integrating its previous experiences, so as to eliminate the overload of
Universal energy and cosmic consciousness. The soul may also on rare
occasions seek to communicate what it has learned from this process. (See
the book “Problematic Patterns” by the author for information on the
particular mental illnesses and other psychological disorders)

INSOMNIA

“Yellow alert.” They are into chronic vigilance and implication-anxiety, and
they are full of tension and negative expectations. They have a deep fear of
letting go and surrendering, and they don’t dare to relax because they don’t
trust the process of life.

There is an inability to release the affairs of the day, in a feeling that they
have to have hands on control of everything or all hell will break loose.
They have a disturbed mental condition, due to subconscious shock, grief
and despair arising from a rather severely dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“In-over-their-head effects.” They labor under a great deal of guilt and fear
over imagined wrong-doings and failures and their consequences. They are
forever experiencing potentially intensely threatening situations. They have
an inability to love themselves, to trust love, and to trust life. It’s a function
of having been the “sane one” in their family during childhood. They were
therefore in effect overwhelmed at all times, along with being targeted for
the blame for all the misery -- and they bought the guilt.

INTERMITTENT BLEEDING (“Irregular Menstruation”)

599
“She-jection.” She has a lot of ambivalence about her femininity or her
feminineness. She is angry or ashamed about being a woman in part, and
that is acting up now. It comes from having been made wrong for being a
woman -- “We (I) wanted a boy.” -- “Isn’t that just like a woman?” -- “God
dammit, why can’t you think like a man?!” -- “Women are the cause of all
the world’s troubles.” -- “It’s a man’s world.” etc.

***************************************

“No way, Jose!” She is into intense fertility/creativity-avoidance. She is

afraid of or resistant to the generative function -- with all its responsibilities
and ramifications. Something in her current life is activating this issue at the
present time.

It arises from being made to be afraid of her intuition, creativity, and/or

generativity by her family OR from being over-indulged and under-required
as a child.

***************************************

“Peter Panella.” She is refusing to grow up and become a woman, wanting

to remain a little girl who is “taken care of” all of her life. This imprinting is
now surfacing in her life. It is the result of over-indulgent and under-
requiring parenting, or of being given the message that to grow up and grow
away is total family-betrayal.

INTERSEX (Born with both gender characteristics, usually with a surgical

decision early on. It frequently leaves the person very confused about
gender identity issues.)

“Experience-expansion.” Their soul opted for a truly challenging and

broadening experience for this lifetime. They will add it to their whole soul
history in a manner that is designed to increase their capacity to teach and
heal.

***************************************

600
“Karmic balancing.” They now have to learn from the consequences of
their abusive patterns in past lives. They will honor the First Law of the
Cosmos, the Equal Exchange of Energy, by this process. They will also
come out of it a much richer soul in experience.

INTESTINAL CRAMPS

“Dodge ball.” They are engaged in a fearful refusal to flow with

experiences, and they are stopping the process in its tracks. They fear
assimilating negativity. They have learned that nothing can be counted on,
and that all good things are “poison apples.” It is the result of an underlying
distrust of the Universe generated by a dysfunctional family.

INTESTINAL FLU

“Damned if I do, damned if I don’t.” They have a fear of attack from others
and taking life in fully. There is a feeling of lack of support and protection.
There is an insufficient involvement and interaction, an “among us but not
of us” -- “urban hermit” pattern.

They are subject to conflict, confusion and susceptibility to suggestion,

especially from the “world of agreement” or the “group mind” or “statistical
proofs.” Underneath is a buried rage and hatred for their being so alone,
alien and alienated.

It comes from a family in which they “could do no right” as the

unrecognized and unacknowledged “family hoist” on whom everyone
depended, and whom no one supported, sustained or validated.

“INTUITION HEADACHES” (That come on whenever they exercise their

intuition)

“Not allowed!” They are experiencing intense conflicts over their

perceptions, intuitions and gestalt comprehensions of situations and
processes. These were not acceptable to the family in a BIG way.

***************************************

601
“Direct perception-deflection.” They are systematically suppressing their
intuition and psychic capabilities. They are heavily into imagination-
avoidance, and they are detached and intellectually stagnant.

They have difficulty in discrimination and in focusing in life in the form of

perceptual problems. They are lost in projections of their negative feelings,
and of feared “distorting lens” effects. It came about as a function of their
being in a family in which any form of intuitive or imaginative activity was
either the basis of disaster in the family’s functioning or the grounds for
severe rejection and assault.

INVOLUNTARY TREMOR

“Responsibility-immobilization.” They are getting stuck, due to paralyzing

thoughts, and they are fixated on a particular mind-set, mental approach and
paradigmatic model. They want to “make things all right,” out of a feeling
of having to be the one responsible for everything that happens.

They were placed in a position of excessive and parental role responsibility

from a very early age, with the result that they were in over their head from
the very start. Their family was highly dysfunctional, and they felt it was
their fault.

***************************************

“Rigid rejection.” They are full of guilt, and they are not able to forgive
others or themselves. They are extremely rigid in how they think that
should be, and they are rejecting of life. They are trapped in implication-
terror at the thought of things being different from what they imagine, or of
their having to try a new approach to things.

They are the product of a perfectionistic and inflexible family culture who
blamed them for all that wasn’t “up to snuff.”

***************************************

“Cosmic calamity.” They have an intensely anxious relationship with the

Universe that is full of fear, uncertainty and insecurity. They have a “God

602
will KILL me if I do anything different!” feeling. It is the result of a very
rigid adaptation to a severely dysfunctional and frightening family who
themselves manifested a very fearfully narrow viewpoint and lifestyle.
They played the role of the “family hoist” who was the pivot point of
everything.

“IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME” (See “SPASTIC COLON”)

“IRRITABLE STOMACH SYNDROME” (Pains, upsets, nausea, etc.)

“I can’t stomach this!” They are encountering experiences that are all too
evocative of the feelings and events of their dysfunctional childhood, where
they were helplessly entrapped.

ITCHING

“Scratch attacks.” They are having desires that “go against the grain,” in the
form of guilt and shame over their wants, needs and desires. There is
something “getting under their skin,” and they are greatly irritated by it.
They want to get away from it, to “scratch it out of their life,” and they are
most unhappy with where they are in life. There is an intense dissatisfaction
with their situation, along with numerous unfulfilled needs, wants and
desires.

This is an old, familiar feeling for them, as they come from a severely
dysfunctional family in which nothing ever really worked or worked out for
them.

***************************************

“Stroke-starved.” They are experiencing steadily mounting emotional

problems in intimacy, or they are deeply troubled by their intimacy-
inability. They are “itching” to get out or to get away. Yet they feel they
don’t have the right to do so. They are resenting having the need for
stroking and having to do it for themselves. They are the product of a
withholding and untrustworthy family.

***************************************

603
“Chronic remorse.” They have a lot of sorrow and regret over past intended
interventions, actions and/or events. There is a torturing sense of “evilness”
for having needs, wants and desires, and over their particular wishes and
requirements. They are systematically joy-and positivity-avoidant, out of a
deeply ingrained sense of somber morality towards themselves.

They have a pronounced feeling of non-deservingness of having their needs

met, and an intense fear of and shame for their own desires. Their creative
nature seems to be all dried up, because of sudden self-disgust and self-
distrust and they are heavily into self-punishment and guilt. It is the result
of severe wrong-making, accusation and rejection, starting in infancy.

***************************************

“Sexual shame.” There is a lot of sexual guilt, due to a sex-ploitative

smother-mothering and a shame-inducing history. They have a desperate
desire for affection, and a deep fear of being hurt for it. The end result is an
inability to let love, affection, and erotic contact in, and they are deeply
hurting and hurting themselves for it. It also results in touch-starvation, with
a simultaneous vulnerability-paranoia.

***************************************

“Urge to merge.” They are experiencing a profound and deep-seated need

for “Cosmic fusion” and some sort of ecstatic experience. They feel utterly
isolated and cut off, and they long for a truly meaningful connection with
something larger than themselves. It is the feeling of being desperately
separate from God, along with anxious and self-accusatory concerns about
why they are that way.

It is the result of an intense “urban hermit” reaction to being held

accountable and responsible for everything that went wrong in their family,
along with consistent rejection, starting in the womb.

***************************************

“Experienced rejection.” Someone is projecting their irritation at the

individual. They have become an irritant to this person, and they are feeling

604
the effects of the anger the other person has towards them. This is not an
unfamiliar experience for them, as they were told all their childhood that
they were a constant source of irritation.

ITCHING EARS

“Urban hermit blues.” They are intensely involved in a deep-seated sense of

separateness and isolation, and they feel rejected by God because of their
negativity. As a result, they try to suppress or to take care of any and all of
their needs, wants and desires entirely on their own. They have a great deal
of guilt and shame for having these and that is now becoming quite intense
as an issue.

They feel that “God is not pleased” with them because they are
encountering needs and desires to connect and form intimate relationships.
Their experience is that this is am strengsten verboten, (most strictly
forbidden) yet they can’t continue to suppress this growing motivation and
manifestation. It is a matter of considerable conflict for them at the present
time.

This whole complex developed as a function of being relied upon

exploitatively as the “family hoist” while simultaneously being blamed for
everything that went wrong in the family.

This occurred as a function of being sufficiently superior in some way to

their parents that they were subconsciously placed in the in loco Deity
position by their family. They were literally unconsciously experienced as a
“little God” who was betraying the family when they “allowed” negative
things to happen.

RIGHT EAR ITCHING

“Leave me alone!” They are being bothered by inputs from the environment
concerning their needs, wants and relationship-interest.

LEFT EAR ITCHING

605
“Vulnerability-alarm.” They are being alarmed by their inner thoughts and
feelings concerning the possibility of forming relationships.

ITCHING EYES

“Ostrich response.” They are engaged in awareness-avoidance and denial-

domination, as they become threatened by the prospect of seeing clearly
their life history, current situation and intended destiny on their way to
enlightenment. There is a lot of fear, grief and guilt coming up as an
impending breakout from self-limitations looms on the horizon. They were
never supposed to get this far, and there is a feeling of family-betrayal, self-
endangerment, and oceanic grief as they progress along.

***************************************

“Outta my sight!” There is a deep sense of irritation by what they see, and
they want to rub it out of sight. They find what they are encountering utterly
intolerable, and they react to their indignation by trying not to see the full
implications and ramifications of what is happening. They are the product
of a demoralizingly dysfunctional family where looking the other way was
the only way to survive the tumult and torture of their experiences.

RIGHT EYE ITCHING

“I don’ wanna know.” They have a big fear of seeing too much about the
world around them.

LEFT EYE ITCHING

“Let’s pretend.” They are avoiding knowing their personal characteristics

and their situation.

“ITCH FITS” (Breakouts of itching all over the body, reflecting un-
eliminated toxins in the body, often caused by kidney problems)

“Ejectee-rejectee-dejectee feelings.” They have the feeling that they are

somehow “unfit for human consumption” and that they are at some level an

606
unacceptable pariah. There is a good deal of underlying self-rejection
and/or blame-throwing by their family.

ITCHING LYMPH BUBBLES

“Fear bubbles.” They are generating agitated anticipation and dread of the
future. They are being inundated with implication-anxiety. It arose from an
unpredictable, uncontrollable, non-intervenable dysfunctional family who
lived a “magical misery tour” lifestyle.

ITCHING SCALP

“Direction-debating.” They are intensely concerned about the correctness of

their intentions and interpretations. They are deeply conflicted about their
wants, needs and desires, and about how to go about meeting their many
unmet needs.

They are deeply dissatisfied with their situation, and they are also full of
self-doubts, self-accusations and self-distrust, along with a lot of remorse
and regret over their past activities. They were severely wrong-made and
confidence-undermined by their rejecting and accusatory family.

RECTAL ITCHING

“Moral cretin.” They are suffering from guilt and remorse over the past and
a refusal to forgive themselves. They came up in a highly uncompromising
and accusative household.

REFERRED ITCHING

“Displaced dissatisfaction.” They are experiencing agitation about their

situation, but in a manner which re-locates the problem. They are frustrated
with the way their life is going, but they are afraid to face the real issues
and processes involved. They come from a reality-avoidant dysfunctional
family.

“STING-ITCHES” (Sudden and extremely compelling)

607
“Emotional starvation.” There is an intensely felt basic deprivation and a
strong feeling of unmet fundamental needs. They have a pronounced sense
of utter isolation and alienation, as though they have no business being
here, and as though they will never have any form of support or love in
their life. These “sting-itchies” are suppressed deep pangs of pain about all
this. It is the result of consistent severe rejection, starting in the womb. (See
the area(s) affected for more information).

“-ITIS” (See INFLAMMATION)

I.T.P. (Interstitial Thrombocytopenic Purpura) [Failure of bone marrow to

make blood platelets, resulting in ease of bleeding to death.]

“Burden feelings.” They have intensely rejecting feelings about themselves

arising from a profound buried guilt over a felt impeding of someone else’s
life, an existential guilt about being a dreary responsibility. They have
difficulties in how well they are taking care of their own needs and getting
nurtured. There is also a diminishment of life energy and little vitality-
replenishment.

They have a rigid, somber and disaster-deflecting orientation that got started
in a severely dysfunctional and ferociously close-mindedly denigrating
family in which nothing ever worked. They were held accountable for
everyone’s misery. There was “no room at the Inn” for them -- for their
having any needs or any form of hope or joy.

***************************************

“Bitter stagnation.” They are suffering from deep-seated negative thoughts

and feelings of unwillingness to go on with life. Their emotional body is
deeply troubled, and there is a real lack of joy and no generation of new
ideas. There is an absence of love in their heart. They come from a severely
cynical, self-serving authoritarian and hostile family.

Section 9

608
I

609
I

610
300

611
612
I

301

302

303

304

305

306

307

308

613
309

310

311

312

313

314

315

316

614
317

318

319

615
JAUNDICE (Bile in the blood, leading to yellowish taint to the skin)

“Cynically disgusted.” They are strongly given to sneering pessimism and

nihilism. They manifest a notable lack of love, compassion and tolerance.
They are deeply disappointed, discouraged and disgusted.

They are handicapped by an unbalanced reason that is dominated by

negative internal and external prejudices. They are condescendingly
contemptuous, and they have an intense resentment over lack of recognition
of who they are and what they contribute. It derives from an intensely
injustice-nurturing and nihilistic dysfunctional family.

JAW PROBLEMS

“Thwarted determination.” They have a frustrated inability to translate their

feelings and intentions into effective action. Their determination has found
no place to go, and it has therefore turned into resentment, anger, revulsion,
rage, and the desire for revenge.

They feel unsafe in a world in which they can’t make a difference, and they
also feel deeply self-disgusted concerning their lack of capacity to make the
difference in the situation. Their experience is that they are not at all in a
position where they can express their feelings or act in their situation.

This whole pattern arises from their having been in an “associate parent”
position in a dysfunctional family where no matter what they did to make
things work and function in a sane manner, it didn’t go anywhere.

RIGHT JAW PROBLEMS

“My way or the highway.” They have a lot of resentment of the way things
work in the world, and they have a grim determination to make things
happen their way. This came about when they found that if they got really
bullheaded, sometimes they would get the opportunity to make a difference.

LEFT JAW PROBLEMS

616
“Deprivation-rage.” There is a good deal of resentment about unmet needs,
along with a fierce determination to get their needs met, come what may.
Their experience was that if they didn’t do this, they would literally be
allowed to waste away.

BOTTOM OF JAW

“Arrested crying.” There is an intensely suppressed grief and despair, dating

from very early infancy, when they discovered the nature of their situation.
They quickly found out that any form of expression of their profound
mourning led to disastrous results, and so they have “stuffed it.”

MALOCCLUSION (Dislocation of the lower jaw)

“High and dry.” They are intensely frustrated at their inability to manifest
for themselves and of themselves. Their experience is that “It seems that
circumstance won’t have it so!” They are the product of a grossly over-
bearing, repressive, suppressive or oppressive family whose circumstances
and/or parental characteristics would not allow self-expression or effective
action.

DISLOCATED TO THE RIGHT

“Oh no you don’t!” They frequently find themselves in circumstances

where they are systematically prevented from acting on the environment.

DISLOCATED TO THE LEFT

“It’s not allowed!” They are laboring under a severe injunction to the effect
that it is bad, wrong, evil and/or even suicidal to express themselves or to
advance their purposes.

“OVERBITE” (Dislocated inward)

“Intensely self-expressive.” They have a history of deprivation in which

they had to fend for themselves, and where they had to meet their own
needs unassisted and with insufficient resources.

617
They are dealing with an intense underlying grief by over-compensating
success-seeking, unshakable convictions, and obliviousness to criticism, as
they maintain a cheerful, showy, talkative, aggressive and secret-spilling
style.

“UNDERBITE” (Dislocated outward)

“Pit bull.” They are grimly determined to accomplish what they set out to
have happen. They are “bottom line” convinced that they have to “hang in
there until the last dog is hung” -- against all odds and against all
opposition. It is the result of having had to stand their ground against a
highly intrusively invasive self-immersed dysfunctional family.

TENSE JAW MUSCLES

“Stuffing it.” They are over-self-controlled and holding back, and they are
not telling it like it is. There is a lot of contained and restrained rage about
deprivation and oppression. They are “swallowing stuff,” and they are
suppressing unexpressed strong feelings. It comes from their finding out
that any form of self-expression only made the situation far worse. (See
“TMJ SYNDROME” for more information)

JEJUNITIS (Inflammation of the small intestine) [See SMALL

INTESTINE PROBLEMS]

“JERKING” MOVEMENTS OF THE EYES (Nystagmus)

“What was THAT!?” They are highly reactive-responsive to what happens

around them, and they live in their emotional body. They have strong
emotions, much energy, and a proneness to nervous turmoil.

They are on “yellow-orange alert” at all times, out of their underlying harm-
alarm. It reflects a “hunted rabbit” experience in childhood, as a function of
an unpredictable and blame-throwing severely dysfunctional family.

JOINT PROBLEMS

618
“Rigidly fixated.” They are manifesting rigidity and resistance to change in
the direction of their life. They are unbending, locked in their position, and
unable to move, out of a fear of what lies ahead and out of a refusal to
surrender to the processes of life.

They have a basic distrust of themselves and/or of the Universe, and they
decidedly do not like the way things are headed. As a result, there is no ease
of movement in their functioning or in their moving through the changes in
their life.

Their force-flows of life are not fluid or flexible, and there is a lack of
presence and gracefulness in their functioning. However, the changes in
direction of their life are in response to multi-life issues that they haven’t
been able to handle, and that now must be handled. Their reaction to this
situation is based on having come up in a rigidly patriarchal and
conservative family.

DEGENERATIVE JOINT DISORDER (DJD) [Arthritis-like]

“Straight-jacketed.” They have a pronounced tendency to immobilization,

self-criticism, lack of self-worth, fear, anger and a feeling of being tied
down, restricted and confined. They are self-suppressing and self-thwarting.
They are not allowing themselves to develop their full potential, due to self-
distrust, leading to severe constraints. They desperately want to be free to
move around and to make something of themselves.

They feel unloved, with a resulting resentful bitterness and a critical

judgmentalness towards others. They are suffering from a lot of suppressed
resentment, which tends to result in passive-aggressive behavior. They are
chronically anxious and depressed, and they are afraid of being angry
because it is “wrong, bad and evil.” They are the product of perfectionistic
parenting in which in effect they could never measure up.

***************************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are feeling rejected for what they are,
in the sense of being totally unappreciated. They are feeling very victimized
and put upon, and they experience a lack of love. They feel somehow that

619
they will never receive the acceptance, validation and affection they need.
They are the product of a systematically rejecting family system.

***************************************

“Fight or flight.” They are immersed in a strong reaction to their situation,

and they are chronically anxious. They feel that things have gotten out of
hand, and that they can’t regain control. They feel that they can’t do
anything to change their circumstances, and they are utterly frustrated with
the way their life is going. They have no trust of the “Home Office” (All
that Is), and they feel that “It is botching the job.”

Underneath all this is a feeling of utter powerlessness and a severe self-and

other-rejection arising from their being treated as the “intimate enemy” by
their family.

***************************************

“Repressed rage.” They are full of suppressed resentment and anger and
they have a strongly squashed desire to hit someone. They continuously
ruminate and recriminate over their “indignities,” and they cling to every
item. They have a chronic bitterness and resentment, and they are forever
sending out arrows of hatred, jealousy, general discord and other negative
vibrations.

Their mind is wound up so tight in their hostile preoccupations that it grinds

their whole system to a halt, and they are constantly suppressing their desire
to strike out and hit people. They are pushing another person around or they
are being pushed around by another person. They are the product of an
intensely hostile home.

***************************************

“Rigidly fixated.” They are manifesting rigidity and resistance to change in

the direction of their life. They are unbending, locked in their position, and
unable to move, out of a fear of what lies ahead and a refusal to surrender to
the processes of life. They have a basic distrust of themselves and/or of the
Universe, and they decidedly do not like the way things are headed.

620
As a result, there is no ease of movement in their functioning or in their
moving through the changes in their life. Their force-flows of life are not
fluid or flexible, and there is a lack of presence and gracefulness in their
functioning.

However, the changes in direction of their life are in response to multi-life

issues that they haven’t been able to handle, and that now must be handled.
Their reaction to this situation is based on having come up in a rigidly
patriarchal and conservative family.

***************************************

“Right and righteous.” They are very blaming and critical of people, and
they are convinced that others won’t help them. They are quite fixed, rigid,
intolerant and resistive in their functioning. They are quite angry that
people won’t “carry their load,” so that they have to take on what they
consider an unjust load.

They are full of projected self-disgust, finding in others what they most
dislike in themselves. There are long-standing maladjustments and stony
incrustations based on internal conflicts -- often between a desire to do
something and a fear of failure. They have great resistance and emotional
struggle, with habitual anxiety and fear, “negative faith,” and expectations
that of the worst case scenario.

They operate with a strong will, inflexible intentions, intense opinions, and
an abiding inability to change with changing circumstances. They have a
bad case of the “hardening of the attitudes,” and they are highly rigid,
opinionated and “hung up in principles.” They are forcefully opinion-
pushing, and they put out a steady stream of skeptical criticism. They are
quite hostile, and they are always angry and tense. Calcium growths
indicate the presence of hatred and a severely inflexible mind.

It all came from a “vast wasteland” and “dour destiny” type of family
culture in which they never knew when something would go wrong, just
that it would, sure as the sun rises. It all fell to them to do the necessaries
because no one else could be trusted to do so or to do it right. No one was

621
ever there for them, and since everything that went down was their fault,
they also felt they didn’t deserve anyone to be there for them, bottom line.

***************************************

“Will of iron.” They have a rigid will and very strong opinions that they
will not and probably cannot change. They are unbending in their
expression and self-manifestation. They never let go of anything, as they try
to be the “boss of the Universe” in an effort to make life just the way they
want it. They grew up in a highly inflexible patriarchal and perhaps
authoritarian family, and they “identified with the aggressor.”

***************************************

“Super-glue injustice-nurturing.” They are feeling rejected for what they

are, in the sense of being totally unappreciated. They are full of repressed
resentment and anger, and they have a strongly suppressed desire to hit
someone. They continuously ruminate and recriminate over their
“indignities,” and they cling to every item. They come from a severely
injustice-nurturing dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They are forever sending out arrows of hatred,

jealousy, general discord, and other negative vibrations. Their mind is
wound up so tight in their hostile preoccupations that it grinds their whole
system to a halt.

Underneath all this is a feeling of utter powerlessness and a severe self-and

other-rejection arising from their being treated as the “intimate enemy” by
their family. They are the product of an intensely hostile home.

INFLAMMATION OF THE JOINTS

“Super-glue injustice-nurturing.” They are feeling rejected for what they

are, in the sense of being totally unappreciated. They are full of repressed
resentment and anger, and they have a strongly suppressed desire to hit
someone. They continuously ruminate and recriminate over their

622
“indignities,” and they cling to every item. They come from a severely
injustice-nurturing dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Rigid will.” They are unbending in their expression and self-manifestation.

They are feeling very victimized and put upon, and they have a chronic
bitterness and resentment, leading to a lack of love. They have very strong
opinions that they will not, and probably cannot, change. They are the
product of an authoritarian and severely patriarchal family.

***************************************

“Boss of the Universe.” They have no trust of the “Home Office” (All that
Is), and they feel that “It is botching the job.” They never let go of anything,
in an effort to make life just the way they want it. They grew up in a highly
untrustworthy and incomprehensibly dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They are forever sending out arrows of hatred,

jealousy, general discord, and other negative their whole system to a halt.
They are pushing another person around, or they are being pushed around
by another person, and they are into an arrested “fight or flight” reaction.

Underneath all this is a feeling of utter powerlessness and a severe self-and

other-rejection arising from their being treated as the “intimate enemy” by
their family. They are the product of an intensely hostile home. (See the
joints affected for more information)

JOINTS “POPPING”

“Conservative resistance.” They are afraid of change and of new situations,

and they tend to hang back, and to engage in newness-avoidance activities.
It comes from growing up in a repressive, fearful or conservative family.

“STIFF” JOINTS

623
“No way, Jose!” They are refusing to move forward, to make a new
direction in their life. They are rigidly resistant to change and evolution,
preferring to stick with the “good old ways” well beyond its usefulness, if
not to the point of severe self-detriment. They come from a family in which
there was “one and only one right way” to do everything, and in which any
deviation brought severe consequences. (See the particular joint(s) involved
for more information) [Also, see BURSITIS; INFLAMMATION OF THE
JOINTS]

JOINT REPLACEMENT

“New cup! New cup!” They have in effect completed all the learning and
experience-expansion of their heretofore life pattern. It is time to move on
with all that under their belt and available for their “stage two rocket” phase
of their life.

HIP REPLACEMENT

“Enough, already!” They have had it with regard to the whole process of
potency-suppression that their surrounding environments have always
imposed upon them. They are now ready to embark on a world-influencing
path.

RIGHT HIP REPLACEMENT

“I’ll cause World War III!” They were systematically trained to believe that
they are untrustworthy and potentially dangerous in the environmental
impact. No more!

LEFT HIP REPLACEMENT

“Not AGAIN!?” They are deeply self-distrusting about their choice of

intimates, based on their track record. However, the past was! It’s OVER!

KNEE REPLACEMENT

“I don’t DARE!” They were so programmed into their family’s values,

beliefs, life-way and expectations of an intention for them that they have

624
been highly resistive to manifesting themselves and their destiny.

RIGHT KNEE REPLACEMENT

“Success-avoidance.” They were shooting themselves in the foot in reaction

to the requirement that they move beyond their family’s patterns. Forget it!

LEFT KNEE REPLACEMENT

“Damn me!” They were systematically refusing to manifest their destiny in

accordance with their soul’s intents and with the Divine Design. Not any
longer!

SHOULDER REPLACEMENT

“Everything always falls on my shoulders!” They have the feeling that the
burdens they carry are not their own. They resent the “heaviness” of life,
and they feel that they are carrying the weight of the world on their
shoulders.

RIGHT SHOULDER REPLACEMENT

“Behind the scenes Atlas.” They are constantly taking the over-responsible,
under-appreciated and hyper accountable role. End of that story!

LEFT SHOULDER REPLACEMENT

“Alone and alien.” They feel that they have to handle all their needs, with
no help from non-existent friends. They have had enough of that old story!

“JUNGLE ROT” (Severe fungus infection)

“Swamp growth.” They are refusing to release the past, and they are letting
the past rule today. They are stuck in stagnating beliefs and stationary
strategies. The feeling is that “The war is NOT over,” that nothing has
substantially changed since they developed their ways of being and doing
things in a dysfunctional family.

625
That, in turn, is a self-fulfilling prophecy effect generated by the assumption
that nothing has changed, so that there is continuous re-validation of the
assumptions and strategies of the past. They are the product of a
retrogressive, past-fixated and rigid patriarchal family who won’t let go of
what was. (To ascertain more of what the fungus means, check the
section(s) of the body the fungus is growing on for the meanings)

Section 10

626
627
J

320

628
629
J

321

322

323

324

325

630
326

631
KAPOSY’S SARCOMA (Large red spots all over the body usually arising
from sexual promiscuity)

“Unfit for human consumption.” They have intense concerns about how
they think other people are seeing them, how they fit in to the norms of
society, and how they see themselves and their deeper insecurities.

They are embarrassed, ashamed and guilty. There are feelings of inferiority,
low self-esteem, ostracism and obstruction. They are concerned about how
good an example they are to others. They are troubled by their unexpressed
unlovely thoughts about other people that have arisen out of a severely
unpleasant life history. They were subjected to severely critical, wrong-
making, judgmental and blame-throwing parenting.

***************************************

“Proving themselves.” They have real world mastery problems, and they
end up trying to demonstrate their proficiency in areas where they aren’t
really capable. They are deeply bothered by how much they aren’t being
allowed to use their expertise.

They have been so misunderstood and ill-treated that they feel that they
have to withdraw into their core to protect their individuality and integrity.
This all got started in their intensely rejecting and exploitative family.

***************************************

“Letting things get under their skin.” There is a lot of anxiety and fear from
old, buried “gukky” stuff, including from past lives. They have a feeling of
being threatened in some way, which is a warning to watch their attitude.
They grew up in an infuriatingly and intensely threateningly untrustworthy
dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Sexual guilt.” There is a felt need for punishment arising out of their
severe sexual and generalized shame. Their gut-level belief that sexuality is

632
sinful or dirty, due to a sexually suppressive and shame-inducing, yet
simultaneously “tantalizing tarantula” seductive-destructive sex-ploitive
dysfunctional family.

KIDNEY PROBLEMS (Inability to cleanse the blood of waste products)

“Negative thinking.” This problem is designed to convey the message that

they need to turn off their forever looking at what’s wrong about things.
There has to be a willingness to repress, suppress or refuse to express
negative inner experiences and qualities.

It is a law of manifestation that if you wish to learn that which is within,

make it manifest externally or overtly. Now they have done that, they need
to master their negativity as a major lesson of this life.

***************************************

“Shadow-boxing.” They are afraid of that which was rejected by their

environment, and that was required to be “shoved into the shadow” as a
child. So anything that activates their unexpressed aspects frightens them.
They are therefore emotionally confused, and they systematically repress
their emotions. This most often shows up in difficulty accepting and getting
along with other people, especially intimate partners, who express these
repressed qualities they find in themselves. It is an “I just hate that about
you!” (as they point their finger at themselves) reaction.

***************************************

“Blew it!” They are having the experience of a failure, a loss, a set-back, a
disappointment or a reversal. Their experience is that it is their own entire
fault, due to their being a general “fuck-up.” They are over-reacting to this
disappointment situation. Their family was blame-throwing, accountability-
attributing, wrong-making and exploitative.

***************************************

“Intense vulnerability-anxiety.” They are suffering from a chronic primal

fear, with a pronounced tendency to run their life around “saving for a rainy

633
day.” They are experiencing considerable anxiety, worries and fears over
money. There is no sense of well-being, and they are intensely
abandonment-anxious. They have no trust of partnership, commitment or
connection, and they feel alone on their own.

They are the product of an intensely anxiety-inducing and rejecting

dysfunctional family in which much went wrong over which they had no
control and for which there was no solution.

***************************************

“Self-acceptance issues.” They have much self-doubt and they are ashamed
of themselves. They are feeling like a kid who can’t do it right, and who is
“not good enough.” They have a strong feeling of failure and a profound
sense of loss and grief.

There is much self-disappointment, self-disapproval and self-rejection.

They are intensely reluctant to release their negative emotions. They have
deep feelings of inadequacy, insufficiency, incompetence, worthlessness,
and guilt.

They are experiencing intense demoralization, unhappiness and confusion.

They have become completely amotivational, and they are manifesting no
effort or ability to take care of themselves -- they are showing no self-
respect.

There has been a sudden shock or the triggering of a great deal of grief.
They were systematically told that they don’t have what it takes to make it
by a family who were invalidating, denigrating and accusatory.

***************************************

“Selfish judgementalness.” They are intensely prone to criticalness, along

with a propensity to jealous possessiveness, envy and greed as a defensive
strategy. They could care less about ecological issues, they are severely
uncaring and selfish. They have lost their cleverness and capacity for
energetic work to an over-riding fearfulness. They are in effect paranoid in

634
their orientation and functioning. They grew up in an authoritarian
patriarchal household.

***************************************

“Right and righteous.” They come from a moralistic, perfectionistic and

demanding family. They therefore are in effect trying to control everything
to make things correct according to their criteria. They ended up being
rather severely judgmental and resentful towards people for not living up to
their standards. They are full of unjustified criticalness and wrong-making.

RIGHT KIDNEY PROBLEMS

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They have feelings of utter incompetence at coping

in the world.

LEFT KIDNEY PROBLEMS

“Self-rejection.” There are profound shame, guilt, and worthlessness

feelings.

INFLAMMATION OF THE KIDNEYS

“There I go again!” They are having an over-reaction to disappointment and

failure experiences. They are flooded with implication-anxiety based on
past patterns, in a self-distrust reaction. They have the experience that the
universe is unjust, and that they have become the product of that fact. They
are convinced that they are trapped forever in the adaptations they made to
their original dysfunctional family.

KIDNEY STONES

“Angry despair.” They are feeling misunderstood, with an intense feeling of

frustrated despondency. There is a large store of unshed tears, fears, and
sadness arising from old issues that should have been released but have
been instead held onto. They are also storing resentments and holding
grudges in such a manner as to result in crystallizations of their rage in the
form of stones.

635
The whole thing is an overlay on top of their underlying feeling of
incapacity to cope with the demands of life arising from intensely
accusatory and blame-throwing parenting in a highly suppressive
household.

KLEBSIELLA (Immune system overwhelm. It results in upper respiratory

problems, fever, chills and can lead to pneumonia. It can also result in liver
problems.)

“Severe demoralization.” They have a deep underlying despair and a

resigned “what’s the use?” attitude. They are in effect “running on empty,”
and they are in effect giving up life, feeling that they have no ability to
determine or control anything.

It is the result of having had to “carry the world on their shoulders” all their
life, with little or no ability to receive or request or require a return in kind.
They are the product of a severely dysfunctional family for which they were
held accountable and responsible. They were told in effect that they were
the source of all their family’s problems while actually being the only one
deflecting some of the disasters.

***************************************

“Suppressed sorrow.” They are desperate and tired of life, due to a

generalized disturbances in their processes and situation. They are having
“salt poured in their emotional wounds” experience that are not being
allowed to heal. They are fearful and anxious to the point of being
overcome with desperation and futility feelings. They are struggling with
confusion-inducing emotional conflicts, and there is a failure to maintain
immunity to negative ideas.

There may also be a “tie that grinds” stifling, domineering and/or over-close
relationship in their life. They are being overloaded and restricted, and they
are very angry about it. However, they don’t feel that they can do or say
anything about it, for fear of catastrophic consequences.

They are the product of an authoritarian, oppressive and/or possessive

family who instilled a deep-seated sense of being helpless, hapless and

636
hopeless.

KLINEFELTER SYNDROME (XXY genetic structure that generates

language-related learning disabilities, with speech delay, extreme shyness,
and small genitalia in some cases.)

“Best of both.” They have components of both genders in their genetic

make-up, and it gives them the capacity for manifesting the qualities and
capacities of each of them. However, it does tend to result in some
undermining of the operation of the left hemisphere, which requires some
compensatory training and intervention, preferably early in childhood, after
a chromosomal check.

It is the result of destiny design intentions to be able to manifest the

capabilities of both genders in their role, experiences and contributions in
this lifetime. Depending on how it has played out in their life, it can be
either Cosmic consequences for past life abuses in the male role that result
in their being able to do neither role well, or dharmic for the purposes of
extraordinarily integrated contributions.

KNEE PROBLEMS

“Major change.” Their beliefs in life about what they thought they could
believe in and had to be true are being “blown out of the water” by current
developments and realties. Their life course is changing dramatically, and
they are having a great deal of difficulty accepting the direction its taking.

They are deep in destiny conflicts, as their future becomes unclear. Their
self-worth, identity and social acceptance are on the line. Their response is
to “hunker down in the bunker” in an inflexible holding onto patterns of the
past, as a self-protection and self-reassurance strategy.

They come from a rather traditional or mainstream family or from a “hung

up in principles” family and/or from a dysfunctional or neglectful family,
and they are having difficulty dealing with where the world is taking them.

***************************************

637
“Ramrod rigid.” They are having problems with surrendering to
spontaneity, flow and fluidity, along with an inability to bend and to be
giving. They are rather intensely inflexible, and they are therefore in
constant conflict with the requirements of life. They grew up in a rather
fixed, patriarchal and authoritarian family, and they never learned to
integrate flexibly into an ever-changing and multi-cultural world.

***************************************

“Maya-max.” They are having serious integration and direction issues, and
they are unable to display much, if any forgiveness, understanding or
compassion. They have turned away from the linkage between the Higher
Self and their ego, and there is very poor communication between these
realms, due to severe immersion in the illusions of the material world. The
result is a deep distrust of the Universe and an unwillingness to bow to
God’s Will and Authority, or to bring their Higher Self in contact with the
Earth through kneeling. Their formative experience led them to conclude
that the spiritual and larger reality worlds were a fiction, a humbug or a
destructive lie.

***************************************

“Nobody tells ME what to do!” They are heavily into “rebellious child”
authority-freak and control-avoidance, with an intensely inflated ego. They
have taken to power-freaking, false pride, and fear of loss and lack, of
bondage and of annihilation.

They are unable to bend and they stubbornly insist on their own way, out of
rigidity, obstinacy, and/or fear. They won’t give in or bend their knees to
authority or structure either. They grew up in an authoritarian family in
which the other parent colluded and encouraged rebellion on their part.

***************************************

“Inflated ambitions.” They display little, if any humility, and they are full of
stubborn ego and pridefulness. There is a great deal of resentful antagonism
and feelings of being under-rated. However, this is serving as a cover and
excuse for not standing up for their own point of view.

638
At the base of it all is a deep fear of failure and an abiding competence-
anxiety -- a fear that they can’t make it to the top or that they won’t be able
to complete their ambitions. It arises out of their not having the experience
of their own authority (which is earned respect -- based on their “track
record”). This fear comes from intense programming from the family to be
over ambitiously self-sabotaging and success-avoidant, as a means of
“keeping them around the old homestead.”

RIGHT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Basic belief violations.” Their foundational premises about things they

really cherish like, “I can always count on Dad if I’m upset,” are being
betrayed. As a result, there are intense issues around the selection of the
direction to acquire the resources for self-expression, social conformity and
manifestation of their destiny. They are afraid to take a stand, and they tend
to also be resistive to external influence, especially authority. It feels like a
matter of life-sustenance to them.

LEFT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Fundamental assumption outmoding.” Their beliefs about the things that

provide stability and meaning like their spiritual values, their destiny
strategies, their identification figures and groups, and their intimates are
being put out to pasture.

They are therefore rudderless with regard to direction-taking commitments

to manifest their selfhood, destiny and purpose in life. They tend to not be
attuned or responsive to the things that happen in their life as a result.

They are in deep conflict about independence-expression versus devotion to

God’s Will. The outcome is a lot of insecurity and situational stress.

KNEECAP PROBLEMS

“Immobilization.” They are so caught up in the struggle with the

requirement to change and/or to implement their destiny that they have
come to an impasse. They were heavily programmed by their family to

639
conform to their family’s values, beliefs, life-ways and expectations of and
intentions for them.

RIGHT KNEECAP PROBLEMS

“Success-avoidance.” They are “shooting themselves in the foot,” in

reaction to the requirement that they move beyond their family’s patterns
towards their destiny.

LEFT KNEECAP PROBLEMS

“Hell no, I won’t go!” They are systematically refusing to respond to their
inner imperatives to manifest their destiny, in accordance with their soul’s
intents and with the Divine design.

BELOW THE KNEE PROBLEMS

“Oh no you don’t!” They are experiencing a resurgence of the injunction

never to succeed that came from their “keep them around the old
homestead” parenting history.

BELOW THE RIGHT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Can I deliver the goods?” They are having a massive attack of

competence-anxiety about their ability to manifest their destiny. It is being
induced by their “implants” to never succeed going off as they “cross the
line” towards their ultimate purpose.

BELOW THE LEFT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Crisis of faith.” They have a deep-felt uncertainty about the true nature of
their relationship to the “Home Office” (All that Is) and their experience of
their destiny.

BEHIND THE KNEE PROBLEMS

“I don’t get it.” They have a feeling that they don’t fully comprehend the
nature of things, like they are the only one who doesn’t understand what’s
going on. It comes from being often excluded and rejected by their

640
dysfunctional family in such a way that they feel somehow out of it and
under-equipped in the area of essential resources for functioning.

BEHIND THE RIGHT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Missing links.” They feel unable to cope and to function effectively, as if

everybody else has a secret for success that they can never have.

BEHIND THE LEFT KNEE PROBLEMS

“Stranger in a strange land.” They have the feeling that they must be from
some other planet, because they feel peculiarly unlike other people. They
also feel like a person without a Cosmos, as they experience being cut off
from the larger realities.

LOSS OF THEIR KNEECAP

“Astral ghost.” Part of their soul has left and entered the astral plane, cut off
from the rest of their soul. This happens when they are having great
difficulty living out their destiny. They were massively programmed by
their severely dysfunctional and possessive family to never manifest their
capabilities and destiny.

RIGHT KNEECAP LOST

“Destiny-incompetence.” They are manifesting an inability to manifest the

capabilities necessary for living out their destiny.

LEFT KNEECAP LOST

“Destiny amotivational syndrome.” They have effected a shut-down of their

motivational system with regard to living out their destiny -- they haven’t
the heart for it.

KNEE REPLACEMENT

“I don’t DARE!” They were so programmed into their families values,

beliefs, life-ways and expectations of and intention for them that they have
been highly resistive to manifesting themselves and their destiny.

641
RIGHT KNEE REPLACEMENT

“Success-avoidance.” They were “shooting themselves in the foot” in

reaction to the requirement that they move beyond their family’s pattern.
Forget it!

LEFT KNEE REPLACEMENT

“Damn me!” They were systematically refusing to manifest their inner

imperatives to manifest their destiny in accordance with their soul’s intent
and with the Divine Design. Not any longer!

KNIFE WOUND

“Cut to the quick.” They have been attacked at the very core of their nature
and of their being. They are feeling completely devastated, betrayed and
potentially mortally wounded. It is an old, familiar feeling arising from their
history of unpredictable attacks and betrayals in their severely dysfunctional
and virulent family.

***************************************

“I hate me!” They engage in systematic self-rejection induced by a severely

rejecting family. The incident is often set off either by too much success
(they “don’t deserve it”) or by demoralizing “demonstrations” of their
“worthlessness” or “evilness” which trigger a frenzy of self-hatred.

***************************************

“Oh no you don’t!” It is a case of “destructive implants” going off in

reaction to their “crossing the forbidden line” towards manifesting their
destiny. The implant was built in as a part of an intense “keep them around
the old homestead” programming designed to maintain them as the
parent(s) “private preserve.”

***************************************

“Self-attack.” They operate out of a belief that they deserve a certain

amount of severely negative events. It arises from being told they were

642
“bad, wrong and evil” by their intensely dysfunctional and
rejecting/blaming/accusing family.

***************************************

“Enraging the Hulk.” They got into a situation where they provoked the
attacker by their behaving in a manner guaranteed to produce that result. It
arises from a variety of sources, including the two immediately above,
along with such things as a “macho” pattern, with its various underlying
dynamics.

***************************************

“Shit happens.” A certain proportion of events occur as a function of the

“random generator” that sees to it that we are always presented with non-
pre-set events as a growth expansion stimulus. It should be noted in this
regard that “shinola happens,” too.

KILLED BY KNIFE WOUND

“Outta here!” The soul’s decision was to leave body now. This can either
represent the completion of its intentions for this life, or a re-assessment of
their situation and a utilization of this “rapid exit” method as the conclusion
of this re-appraisal of what to do next.

***************************************

“Self-destruct.” Here the individual was in effect an accident waiting to

happen. The underlying motivation was massive self-rejection, combined
with insufficient impetus to “take the bull by the horns.” They were the
product of a severely rejecting and self-hate inducing dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“By the sword.” This was the final in a life-long pattern of attack -- counter-
attack. It got started in just such a severely virulent dysfunctional/hostile
family.

***************************************

643
“Shit happens.” In this situation, the random generator component of the
Universe has operated. A small percentage of events are indeed accidental
for purposes of constantly creating new situations for us to handle that are
the result of neither our will nor the Divine Design. Incidentally, “shinola
happens” too, in this regard. (See STAB WOUND; WOUND)

KNOCKED OUT; “K.O.’d”

“Blown out of the saddle.” They are afraid that they can’t cope with what
seems to be an overwhelming situation. They are blocking out a threatening
situation by “blacking out.” It is the result of a competence-and confidence-
undermining “keep them around the old homestead” possessive family
pattern.

KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are so unsure of themselves and the universe that they
are highly reluctant to take initiative or creative action in the world. There
is a lot of competence-anxiety and concerns about their motivation and
worries about how the world will react to their implementations of their
intentions. They come from a possessive, enmeshed and/or undermining
family. (See the finger(s) involved for more information.)

Section 11

644
645
K

646
327

647
K

328

329

648
330

331

332

333

334

649
LABORED BREATHING

“Cosmic cut-off.” They have a restricted ability to partake of the resources

of the Universe -- of love and of support. They either feel undeserving or
unwilling to let love in, and they feel like an outsider in a rejecting world.
They are the product of either ambivalent or out-and-out rejecting
mothering. (See ASTHMA; EMPHYSEMA)

LACK OF COORDINATION (See “AWKWARDNESS”)

LACK OF MENSTRUATION

“Femininity-rejection.” She has a good deal of resentment of being a

woman and of motherhood, along with a dislike of herself generated by a
femininity-hating and/or “wrong gender” messaging household. It also can
reflect a deep frustration with not being able to manifest herself and her
personal power and destiny in a patriarchal world.

LACK OF SEXUAL DESIRE

“Sexual shut-down.” They are experiencing a severe erotic turn off, due to a
traumatic sexual development and sexual history, and/or due to an intense
fear of intimacy arising from emotionally abusive and sex-ploitative and/or
repressive parenting.

***************************************

“Emotional withdrawal.” They are manifesting disengagement from a

particular partner or from all sexual contact, due to an experiential history
of trauma, or due to disengagement-inducing experiences. There may or
may not be an associated history of alienation-inducing and intimacy-
avoidance generating parental practices.

***************************************

“Situational over-ride.” There is a circumstantial impact occurring, in the

sense that their current conditions are diverting energy and interest from the

650
sexual arena and/or their circumstances are generating a hypersensitivity to
vulnerability and intimacy.

LACK OF THE SENSE OF PAIN

“Numbing out.” They are exhibiting a self-protective shut-down reaction to

their severely painful life history by tuning out all forms of pain, for fear of
being utterly driven out of their body if they came in contact with all that
pain. It is the result of a highly assaultive dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Bracing themselves.” They are either preparing themselves to handle a life

of karmic payback or other intensely negative experiences, or they are
seeking to provide themselves the unique life experiences associated with
the lack of the sense of pain, or both. This was decided on the soul level
before entry.

LACTIC ACIDOSIS (Burning sugar rather than oxygen, resulting in

dissolving of the lungs by the resulting acids)

“Self-suppressing.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, and unexpressed passions, strong desires and emotions. They
don’t have any sense of freedom or the right or ability to communicate their
feelings. They have now reached the point where they just can’t take it any
more. This whole thing was generated by a self-immersed and
dysfunctional family who were severely exploitative, shame-inducing and
rescue-eliciting.

***************************************

“Don’t deserve.” Their family experience was one in which they were made
to feel bad, wrong and evil. They therefore feel unworthy of living fully,
and they are alone, sad and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance.
They are once again in a smothering and stifling environment like the one
they grew up in.

***************************************

651
“Wrong commitments.” They get into consuming passionate involvements
that lead nowhere, and to get into repeated devastating unrequited love
situations. They have a sensitive mind and a very strong sense of justice,
righteousness and generosity that frequently leads them into blind alleys
and exploitive situations and relationships.

They come from an injustice-sensitive and righteously indignant family

system that taught them to tilt windmills and to set themselves up in
relationships which replicate the no-win situations they had at home.

***************************************

“Outta here!” They have a real difficulty in taking in prana, chi, qi, love or
life energy as a function of the prideful brutalizing misuse of energy in past
lives. They have an inability to renew to the breath of life and a lack of
enthusiasm and zeal for living.

They are suffering from depression and chronic grief, because they are
deeply afraid of taking in love and life energy. They are joy-avoidant and
happiness-squashing, out of a profound fear of the Universe. They lack
cosmic, community and conjugal contact. Their family was withholding,
rejecting and ejecting.

LACTOSE INTOLERANCE (Suppressed generation of the enzyme

necessary to break down the lactose in milk)

“Rejection of the Maternal.” They find anything and everything having to

do with the Feminine and especially the Maternal rather intensely aversive,
and they are consequently consistently avoidant and/or denigrating of it. It
arises from maternal parenting that was absent, irrelevant, aversive,
exploitative, abusive and/or untrustworthy.

***************************************

“Maternal rejection.” They were systematically subjected to pervasive

maternal messaging that they were “bad, wrong and evil.” They are
therefore convinced at a deep level that they are “unfit for human
consumption,” and they are rather intensely self-rejecting.

652
LADA (Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults)

“Don’t deserve it!” They are systematically engaged in resistance to the

sweet part of life, resulting in a continuous ambivalent reaction to good
things happening for them. They have to constantly grapple with self-
rejection and guilt feelings.

It comes from messaging from the most rejecting parent that they are a
continuous problem, when in fact, they have always been the solution to
problems in their nature and functioning. They were a threat and a guilt-
induction to that parent.

***************************************

“Allergic reaction to themselves.” They feel somehow responsible for all

the ills of the world, that they are the cause. They are having a “get rid of
the problem” reaction. They have ended up with little or no ability to
receive or to request or to require a return in kind.

It is a result of having “carried the world on their shoulders” all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family. They were told in effect that they
were the source of all the family’s problems, while they were actually the
only one who was deflecting some of the disasters.

“LAMENESS”

“It’s O.K., folks!” They have taken on a “handicap factor” to reassure

people that their rather extraordinarily potent beingness won’t “run
roughshod” over everything. They found out early on they were a great
threat to people, and they “gimped” themselves as a threat-reduction
strategy, or it was decided before entry to have such an impact-easing
quality built in.

***************************************

“What do you expect of someone with a wooden leg?” They have a lot of
resentment over having to stand up for themselves, along with a desire to
run away from the responsibilities of life. They are resistive to the

653
requirement to bring their personality and practical manifestation into
congruence with the Cosmos. It is the result of over-indulgent and/or under-
requiring parenting arising from a “keep ‘em around the old homestead”
psychology.

RIGHT LEG “LAMENESS”

“Destiny-avoidance.” They have a fear of manifesting in the world and of

doing their destiny, for fear of the consequences.

LEFT LEG “LAMENESS”

“Self-release avoidance.” They are engaged in a systematic self-avoidance

and refusal to express themselves and their capacities. They are deeply
distrusting and/or disgusted with themselves and/or the world. (See LEG
PROBLEMS)

LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS (Assimilates nutrients from the food

intake)

“Survival-anxiety.” They have intense concerns over whether they can

really handle life. There is a felt powerlessness arising from “skid row”
programming and learned helplessness in the face of a severely
dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Virgo-izing it.” They are trying to cover all the details, to organize and
coordinate everything, to analyze the situation, and to meet all the needs in
the right way. They are given to nit-picking perfectionism, detail-
domination, and an inability to see the forest for the trees. It is a pattern that
got started in a patriarchal and perfectionistic family.

***************************************

“Papa/Mama knows best!” They are prone to over-criticality and a

compulsion to help others that is carried out unwisely. They have a desire to
be needed in order to inflate a damaged ego or to manipulate people.

654
They are pushing ideas or things on people in an unwanted rescue-tripping
pattern that is the product of their feeling responsible for straightening
things out in their severely dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Exploitation-rage.” They feel used and abused, rushed and over-controlled,

and like they are in servitude. They feel injured and degraded by some
external malignant force. They have the feeling that what they give is not
used, appreciated or utilized its intended purposes.

They feel they are being humiliated, and they want to dispose of it now!
They want to eliminate the responsible agent. They are bursting with
unexpressed rage, and they are super self-suppressing. They come from an
exploitative, manipulative and supremely selfishly abusive dysfunctional
family.

***************************************

“Ostrich trip.” They are a basically sensitive, bright, timid, dependent,

Pollyannishly denying, and passive person who are reluctant to take life on.
They are in perfectionistic denial of the realities that they are maintaining a
“conspiracy of silence” about, and which they studiously avoid looking at.

They have the feeling that if they every really looked at their situation, they
would come to a deadly end. Their family was intensely intimidated,
dependent, denial-dominated and rug-sweeping, out of an underlying terror
of the Universe.

***************************************

“Abandonment-paranoid.” They are possessive and emotionally

unbalanced, with no sense of being loved, wanted or needed. They come
from an enmeshed, ambivalent and acceptance-rejection game-playing
family.

***************************************

655
“Serve-aholic.” They are a self-denying, over-responsible, and self-
denigrating in a severely self-defeating manner. It is a
“Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern in which they were used and abused for
self-immersed purposes in an abusive and “jailing” family.

***************************************

“Intuition-avoidance.” They are avoiding their inner knowing, their truth-

perceptions, and their reality-reading capacities. They are putting out an
over-rational and/or fearfully reality-avoidant pattern. They grew up in a
severely dysfunctional and denial-dominated family in which accuracy of
understanding lead to great pain and potential disaster.

***************************************

“Abyss trip.” They are having problems with intense greed and
acquisitiveness to the point of its being an addictive process. They have a
gaping maw quality about them, and they can never have enough. They are
the product of a severely survival-oriented family.

***************************************

“Yin-paranoia.” There are deepseated fears of the unconscious and of the

feminine. They are extremely controlling of their emotions, and they
maintain a compulsive rationality and a “hands on control” approach to life.
They come from an intensely patriarchal family.

CROHN’S DISEASE (Chronic inflammation of the large intestine at the

ileum)

“Can’t discern.” They can’t tell which end is up, due to the distortions of
their discrimination capability. They just don’t know how to tell wheat from
chaff, relevant from irrelevant, safe from dangerous, useful from useless,
etc. It was generated by their confusion-inducing dysfunctional family.

***************************************

656
“I’m not good enough.” They are self-disapproving and insecure in an
“alone on my own” psychology. Their attitude is that they can’t trust
anyone to do anything for them, and that they may not be enough to do the
job either. They feel that they somehow don’t deserve support, and that they
are likely to be inadequate to the cause.

It is the result of early emotional neglect, followed by capability-

undermining and shame-inducing parenting.

***************************************

“Royally pissed off.” They have the feeling that they have been
systematically deprived and derailed all their life. Their experience is that
they get the dirty end of the stick and the dregs/leftovers everywhere they
go. It is an up with which they will no longer put -- they can’t assimilate it
any more, period, end of report! It got started in an exploitative
dysfunctional family.

DIVERTICULITIS (Inflammation of the tiny pouches in the large intestine)

“Undeserving.” They have guilty feelings of unlovability, and they engage

in self-punishing self-deprivation for presumed transgressions. They are apt
to go off into severe self-recrimination in reaction to rejection.

They are not being able to assimilate or absorb what they are experiencing
or who they are. It comes from over-exacting parents who placed their
“love-line” on the block with perfectionistic expectations.

INFLAMMATION OF THE LARGE INTESTINE

“Self-rejecting affection-desperation.” They have a guilty feeling of

unlovability and a great need to be loved that is prevented fulfillment by
self-punishing self-deprivation for presumed transgressions that the outside
world is unaware of.

Their constantly thwarted efforts to achieve affection that never get results
end up in intense self-denigration and severe pessimism. They are apt to go
off into a frenzy of self-recrimination in reaction to rejection of love from a

657
dear one. There is a considerable feeling of undue burdens, emotional strain
and loneliness.

They are over-conscientious and hyper-sensitively over-conscious, with a

false feeling of accountability and moral culpability. They tend to be a self-
defeating loser, out of an emotionally immature attitude of self-destruction.
They are very insecure, and they have a very difficult time letting go of that,
which is over and done with. It came from over-exacting parents who
imposed an experience of intense oppression, over-responsibility and
defeat.

***************************************

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They have a generalized suspiciousness orientation

that is derived from persecutory parenting. They believe that virtually
everything is dangerous and double-dealing. They feel that they have the
right to eliminate the causes of their presumed persecution. They display
extreme distrust, security-freak, and stability-seeking behavior. They are
actively suspicious of the environment, and they are intensely control
imposing.

They have great rageful resentment, feeling like they have received
something poisonous. They want to get rid of it, dispose of it, and to destroy
its source. They are the product of a rather severely paranoid patriarchal and
authoritarian family who treated them as the “intimate enemy.”

REGIONAL ENTERITIS

“Ambulatory paranoid.” They have an organized suspiciousness orientation

derived from persecutory parenting. They believe that virtually everything
is dangerous and double-dealing. They feel that they have the right to
eliminate the causes of their presumed persecution.

They display extreme distrust, security-freak, and stability-seeking

behavior. They are actively suspicious of the environment, and they are
intensely control-imposing. They have great rageful resentment, feeling like
they have received something poisonous. They want to get rid of it, to
dispose of it and its source.

658
They come from an overtly paranoid and hostile family who hid none of
their embittered, extremely suspicious and ragefully vengeful attitudes.
They treated the individual as the “intimate enemy” as well.

LARYNGITIS

“Radio silence.” There is a fear of speaking up, and they are afraid to ask
for what they want because they are sure it would be withheld or used
against them. There is also a fear of expressing themselves and of not being
able to answer questions, criticisms and/or attacks. They are also afraid to
express their opinions or to make recommendations.

So they repress or suppress their feelings, reactions and interpretations.

They weren’t allowed to have wants, needs or desires, they weren’t allowed
to speak up or impact, and they weren’t heard or respected.

***************************************

“They don’t listen to me!” There is a great deal of anger and resentment,
particularly towards the authorities, authority figures and/or authority itself.
They are “so mad they can’t speak up for themselves” -- rageful that they
can’t be or express themselves in the world. There is a suppressed order-
giver underneath all this -- an “I know better what needs to happen here!”
feeling.

This whole experience is an old, familiar theme song for them, as it

represents what happened in their dysfunctional family, where things went
awry all the time, the “powers-that-be” were a “ship of fools,” and they
were not able to say anything about it.

***************************************

“Hoof-in-mouth disease.” They are experiencing shame and guilt over

something they have already said. They are trying to stop themselves from
any further ecological disaster episodes. They are afraid of someone hearing
what they have to say or what would happen if they said any more. They
come from a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional family where any
form of “cover-blowing” blew up the whole family.

659
LARYNX PROBLEMS

“Seen but not heard.” Their experience is that it is decidedly not allowed for
them to speak their piece or to communicate their truth. In effect, it operates
like a tight band around their larynx, which represents a “hob-nailed boot”
from the environment.

They feel immensely frustrated, invalidated, ignored, deprived, humiliated

and ejected/rejected. They also have a profound conflict about whether and
how to express themselves about their needs, awareness’s, wisdom,
recommendations, interventions, predictions, comprehensions, evaluations
etc. The message was very clear that they were to keep their mouth shut.

LARYNGIAL “SPASMS”

“Don’t you DARE!” Their experience is that it is decidedly not allowed for
them to speak their piece or to communicate their truth. In effect, it operates
like a “hob-nailed boot” on their larynx, which represents the reaction from
their early environment.

They feel immensely frustrated, invalidated, ignored, deprived, humiliated

and ejected/rejected. They have a profound conflict about whether and how
to express themselves about their needs, awareness’s, wisdom,
recommendations, interventions, predictions, comprehensions, evaluations
etc.

They are choking to death on their own guilt and shame. They feel that they
should be thoroughly punished or even destroyed for their “sins,”
particularly around their need/desire to communicate the truth.

It comes from a severely accusatory, blame-throwing, moralistic, reality-

avoidant and punitive family. The message was very clear that they were to
keep their mouth shut -- or else.

“LAZY EYE(S)” (Poor ciliary muscle control, resulting in their eye(s)

moving around on their own accord)

660
“I don’ wanna see that!” They are internally conflicted, and they are afraid
to see what’s out there. It is s if it is so horrifying in the world that they
would rather “feel their way along by Braille” than to encounter the full
truth of the situation -- in a kind of “Medusa-paranoia” reaction, in which
they are afraid of what would happen if they saw themselves and the world
in a “mirror.”

It got started in horrifically dysfunctional family in which a child seeing the

whole scene or seeing all of themselves would indeed be overwhelmed and
devastated. So they co-opted the denial-dominated and superficiality-fixated
strategy of their family, and they ended up with a “wandering eyes” pattern,
in order to avoid seeing too much and to avoid being seen seeing.

By doing so, they took on a “protective coloration” camouflage, while

simultaneously calibrating how much of the truth of the situation they could
actually handle at a time. However, it has cost them dearly, because they do
have great difficulty seeing what’s going on, and that has led to many
problems in their life.

In effect, they have a rather nasty habit of getting in their own way, in a
success-deflecting manner. This, in turn, tends to greatly reinforce their fear
of the world and/or of themselves. This is usually, though not always, a soul
decision in order to expand their soul’s experience, to make a contribution
from it all, and/or to pay karmic consequences.

“LAZY” RIGHT EYE

“I can’t handle that!” They have a pronounced propensity to not want to

know what’s going on in the world around them.

“LAZY” LEFT EYE

“I don’t dare look in the mirror!” They systematically suppress awareness

of aspects of themselves that their family would “kill” them for
manifesting.

LEAD POISONING (Forebrain, left hemisphere and midbrain damage)

661
“Amotivational lethargy.” They are not at all certain they want to be here,
having to carry the responsibilities of living. Their feeling is something like,
“Here’s another fine mess I’ve gotten myself into!”

They feel overwhelmed, exhausted and depleted, with little energy available
even for maintenance tasks. They want to be taken care of and be free to
process things unencumbered. It is the result of severely disempowering
and demoralizing competence-and confidence-undermining possessive and
denial-dominated dysfunctional parenting.

LEFT-HANDEDNESS (When associated with the disordered functioning’s

that have been found to be correlated with left-handedness in some people)

“Intense self-distrust.” They have feelings of somehow being the “left hand
of God” (Lucifer). It arises from intense rejection starting intrauterine and
continuing throughout their childhood. They feel like they caused World
War II and that they might set off World War III. They were subconsciously
targeted for all the responsibility and accountability for everything that went
wrong in the family. It started so early and it was so continuous and
pervasive that they ended up truly believing it.

LEFT SIDE OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“Avoiding the Feminine.” They are having difficulties in the realm of

receptivity, taking in, and expressing their feminine side. There is a real fear
of creativity, intuition and comprehensive comprehension. They are afraid
of irrationality, artistic impulses, and deep emotional feelings. There is a
systematic avoidance of their inner self, their fundamental essence, and
their basic motivations and orientations.

They eschew compassion, nurturance and ecological/psychological

responsibility. They are suppressing of feelings, responsively and reactivity.
They denigrate and deflect holistic awareness and expression.

In females, this reflects a rejecting attitude and/or negative manifestation of

the feminine by their female imprinting figures, and/or a systematic
denigration of the feminine by the father and other male imprinting figures.

662
In males, it represents the negative impact of the mother and other
formative females regarding his fundamental attitudes towards women, the
feminine, the maternal and all aspects of the receptive mode.

It can also represent his father’s fear, rage and rejection towards these
manifestations. Finally, it also reflects the distortions of his manifestation of
masculine nobility, power, creativity, and initiative by a dysfunctional
family.

LEG PROBLEMS

“Ungrounded.” They are experiencing difficulties in initiating, manifesting

and impacting in the world. There is a real need for them to develop
practical groundedness, reality-relating and historical roots, and for a
connection to the Earth.

They have a fear of the future, and they are intensely reluctant to propel
themselves forward into growth and expansion as, for instance in extensive
travel, in education, in self-development, or in competence-expansion.

They are afraid of change, and to take the risks involved in climbing the
success ladder and in moving ahead in their life. They are a high-flying
idealist and idea person, with relatively little ability to carry it off. They in
effect don’t have the ability to understand the nature and processes of the
world around them. The net effect is they are having difficulties in the realm
of success and adventure, and they are constantly fending off losses and
failure, in a harm-avoidant lifestyle.

They were rather sheltered from the requirements of life when they were
growing up in an enmeshed family. Or they escaped into an alternate world
or an inner world to avoid the harshness of their family’s dysfunctionality.

***************************************

“Thrown to the wolves.” They feel a lack of support from a needed source -
- emotional, moral, pragmatic, financial, philosophical or spiritual. They
feel “abandoned to their own devices,” without sufficient sustenance
sources. They feel manipulated by others, and they are on a “sit down

663
strike.” They were left to their own devices a lot as a child by their self-
immersed and exploitative family.

***************************************

“Spineless wonder.” They are manifesting resentment over having to stand

up for themselves, along with a desire to run away and to escape from the
responsibilities of life. They are therefore unable to take much of a stand
about things or to hold any kind of resolve on anything.

They want to duck out on such things as having to have a philosophy of

life, long range plans, and religious, moral and political values. They are, in
essence, a care-free load-dumper who wants to be scot-free and
unencumbered by issues of power, stability, security and nobility.

They are resistive to the requirement to bring the physical personality and
practical manifestation into congruence with the Higher Self and the
Cosmos. They are in effect afraid to grow up and be a sexually, socially and
spiritually mature adult.

This whole pattern is the result of under-requiring and interference-running

by the family, especially the mother, as the family manifested a strategy of
keeping them around the old homestead via inducing a “forever young”
psychology. Or they simply were too self-involved to “care enough to give
the very worst” as part of their parenting responsibility.

RIGHT LEG PROBLEMS

“Tie that grinds.” They are experiencing issues in the realm of love. They
aren’t experiencing enough love and/or they are love-commitment- and
relationship-avoidant, as a result of being forever fettered to their mother. It
is also resistance, refusal or restricted capacity to manifest the yang
initiating, impacting and self-sufficiency characteristics.

LEFT LEG PROBLEMS

“Support conflicts.” They are manifesting support issues in the form of their
feeling that they aren’t supported. Or, conversely, they have difficulties in

664
trusting support, and so they refuse to receive it, or to allow themselves to
be taken care of by the world or other people. They have issues with the
realm of the yin - receptivity, nurturance, generativity, etc.

LOWER LEG PROBLEMS

“Stuck in childhood.” They are afraid of the future, and they don’t want to
move on or to move up and out. Their manifestation is one of being a
perpetual child or adolescent who needs others to take care of them and to
handle the responsibilities of being a human being in the world. (See CALF
PROBLEMS; SHIN PROBLEMS)

PARALYSIS OF THE LEG(S)

“Avoiding life.” They don’t want to be bothered, required of, involved or

impacted on by the world around them. They are seeking to not have to deal
with things they don’t want to experience or that they are afraid of.

RIGHT LEG PARALYSIS

“Commitment-avoidance.” They are determined not to take on the

responsibilities and vulnerabilities of intimacy.

LEFT LEG PARALYSIS

“Support issues.” They feel that there is not enough support in their life or
that they can’t trust the support there is. They therefore systematically
deflect involvement with the world. (See KNEE PROBLEMS)

UPPER LEG PROBLEMS

“Self-fulfilling prophecy.” Their adult life experiences are manifesting a

self-defeating pattern, as they systematically avoid their Higher Self and as
they consistently hobble themselves. (See THIGH PROBLEMS)

LEG BONE PROBLEMS

“Self-support issues.” Troubled leg bones have to do with issues about

handling life for themselves, and about providing resources and buffering

665
for themselves.

UPPER LEG BONE (Femur or “thigh bone”)

“Lost Cosmic connection.” They are having difficulties in communication

between their Higher Self and their personality ego as they relate to the
practical realm. They tend to get lost in the “immediate gratification”
dynamic.

RIGHT FEMUR

“Yang hang-ups.” There are problems in the manifestation of the masculine

aspect of the Higher Self.

LEFT FEMUR

“Yin-inhibitions.” They have difficulties in the feminine manifestation of

their Higher Self.

LOWER LEG BONE (Tibia or Fibula)

“Essence-expression-prevention.” They are having difficulties in the

manifestation of their destiny on the practical plane, as well as with gender
quality expressions.

FIBULA (Hidden in the calf)

“Cross-gender expression issues.” There are conflicts regarding the

manifestation of their other-gender qualities.

A broken or ailing tibia (shin bone) in a male indicates that some aspect of
masculinity is being over-emphasized. A broken or ailing fibula (hidden in
the calf) in a male indicates some sort of trouble in expressing the feminine,
because the fibula is the other-gender-manifesting lower leg bone.

Meanwhile, a broken or problematic tibia in a female reflects excessive

projection of the feminine, and a broken or problematic fibula indicates a
resistance to or a problem in manifesting the masculine in her life.

666
RIGHT FIBULA

“Cross-gender competence problems.” They are having difficulties in the

expression of their other-gender competences.

LEFT FIBULA

“Cross-gender emotional issues.” There are problems in the expression of

their other-gender motivations and feelings.

TIBIA (Shin Bone)

“Gender-expressing issues.” They are manifesting problems with regard to

how to practically manifest their body gender qualities.

RIGHT TIBIA

“Yang inhibition.” They are having trouble expressing their environmental

impact capacities in a manner that is destiny-manifesting and body gender
expressing.

LEFT TIBIA

“Yin-suppression.” They are being hobbled by issues concerning self-

release and self-expression of their body gender qualities and their destiny
intentions.

BROKEN LEG

“Drop-away.” They are experiencing a felt sudden loss of grounding,

support and/or internal determination. There has been an abrupt loss,
severance or removal of their source of stance and strength.

This is not a new experience for them, as they rather frequently underwent
such sudden losses of grounding and resources in their dysfunctional
family.

BROKEN RIGHT LEG

667
“Loss of support.” They are encountering a sense of cut-off from their
needed resources from their social, ecological and/or internal environment.

BROKEN LEFT LEG

“Support issues.” They are having difficulties dealing with their need for or
their receiving of support. They are greatly conflicted over being in such a
situation.

LEGIONNAIRES DISEASE (Sudden virus-caused failure of the immune

system)

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are manifesting a certain mental

harshness and hard-nosed closed-mindedness. They have a will of iron, and
they are intensely inflexible, out of a “generalized dread.” They have taken
on their life with self-willed determination and a “true grit” response.

They feel that there is no support or assistance, and that they have to take it
all on by themselves. They are very rigid and moralistic, with a steel-
reinforced value system, along with a fixed way of looking at the world and
of doing things.

This all started in a family in which they were treated as the “intimate
enemy.” What has happened now is that they have reached the end of their
rope with this lifestyle, and they are depleted and exhausted to the point
where they don’t have the wherewithal to.

LEISHMANIASIS (Debilitating disorder that can result in severe facial

disfiguration)

“Here’s another fine mess I’ve gotten you into!” They are intensely
shameful and self-blaming. They also fear attack and accusation from
others, and they feel very vulnerable to devastation by other people. They
have a rotten self-image, and they feel they are somehow deserving of their
“ejectee/rejectee/dejectee” situation due to their “wrong-being.”

It is a pattern that was created by a severely rejecting, exploitative and

blame-throwing family.

668
LEPROSY (Bacterial disease leading to slow swelling, disfiguration,
disintegration, and loss of sensation)

“I’m not good enough.” They have a very strong belief in being “evil,”
“immoral,” and “unclean.” They feel that they deserve “just punishment”
for their “wrong-being.” They have a “rotten” self-image that is massively
self-rejecting. They believe that God hates them. They are immobilized by
their limitations, both genuine and imagined, and they can’t handle life at
all.

They are the product of a devastatingly destructive and denigrating

dysfunctional family who was abusive, sex-ploitative and shame-inducing.
There never was any love in their life. (See the body part(s) involved for
more information)

LEUKEMIA (Excessive white cells leading to self-attack and self-

destruction)

“I am my limitations!” This is the foundational assumption, and they feel it

is totally unsafe to be who they are. They are giving up on life with a
massive “What’s the use?” feeling and an accompanying severe depression
and despair. They feel that their present situation and future prospects are
totally unacceptable and intolerable. They feel utterly hapless, helpless and
hopeless. Their family was super-subtly viciously violent and accusingly
attacking.

***********************************

“Moral monster.” Because it was so subconscious and subterranean, they

took all their family’s dysfunctional blame-throwing on themselves as
God’s just judgment. The result is that they are now brutally killing their
inspiration and self-manifestation as a “moral imperative.” They are unable
to express their feelings about things, their reactions to things, and their
position on things. They are the product of an accusatory/attribution
rejecting family.

***************************************

669
“Alienated isolation.” At base, they are distrusting, dismissive, alienated
and confused by love for and from others, and they want to isolate
themselves and not feel anything.

It seems to result in intense frustration with themselves, and in a bottling up

of their emotions, with especial repression of their disturbed or conflicted
attitudes towards love. Underneath, they are also deeply resentful and
disgusted by people, with a lot of vengeful thoughts.

The disease is often precipitated by the loss of an intimate such as a parent.

It apparently comes about as a result the loss’s connection with their lack of
the expression of the love within them. They are the product of a
distantiating, untrusting, and alienated family. (See CANCER)

LEUKORRHEA (See VAGINAL WHITE DISCHARGE)

LICE

“Cootie-ville.” They are full of self-disgust and “moral cretin” feelings.

They seem to “have their head up their rear,” in that their choices and
impacts are so apparently detrimental. It is the resultant of wrong-making
and blame-throwing, perhaps perfectionistic parenting.

***************************************

“Deep distress.” They are chronically in difficulty, and they have much
worry. They are so distraught that they have developed the pattern of
coming down with defensive illnesses, and they are therefore continuously
bothered by uneasy feelings about their health.

They are always plagued by vexing enemies, and famine and catastrophic
loss are ever-present potential realities for them. They are the product of a
calamitously dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Lost in space.” They are so out of touch that they can’t cover the basics.
They “dream walk” their way through life, leaving a trail of dirty dishes and

670
clothes, along with unfinished commitments and broken promises.

They were totally undermined in their ability to track reality by their

severely dysfunctional and enmeshed family as a child.

***************************************

“Obnoxious materialism.” They are unpleasantly self-advancing, with an

insensitive money-hungriness and an annoyance-generating fixation on
luxury and prestige. They grew up in a similar household.

***************************************

“Total immortality.” They are an unprincipled exploiter and a licentious

abuser who will go so far as to be systematically neglectful and incestuous
with heir children with utter complacency.

They figure the world is for them to take whatever they want from, and they
could care less about the consequences to others or the ecology. They come
from an equally amoral environment.

LIGHTNING STRIKE (On them)

“Enlightenment-seeking.” They are systematically developing themselves,

especially in the spiritual wisdom sphere. They encountered the Cosmic
early on, as they reacted to the dysfunctionality of their family by pulling
inward.

The trouble is they therefore tend to be too spiritually oriented, at the

expense of the development of their other aspects. They are being called on
to balance themselves at present.

***************************************

“Atonement-freak.” They tend rather strongly to be self-punishing, success-

avoiding and self-sabotaging. It comes from being told that they were in
effect the cause of World War II, and that they are sure to “set off World
War III.”

671
 ***************************************

“Annihilation-anxious.” They feel at the mercy of a stormy environment,

and they are chronically protection-seeking. They are the product of an
alarmingly emotional-commotional, unpredictable, and potentially
dangerous dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

KILLED BY LIGHTNING STRIKE

“You’re out!” They were having overwhelming difficulties in manifesting

their destiny and their inner soul, and the “Home Office” (All that Is) or
their Higher Self decided to pull them from the game, in order to start over.
They were the product of a severely dysfunctional family who programmed
them to believe they deserved to function in that manner.

***************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE FROM LIGHTNING STRIKE

“Spiritually guiding.” They are now an intelligent, life-understanding

wisdom-manifestor. They are now here to assist us in integrating the
spiritual with the practical.

672
They were effectively being driven to get in touch with the Cosmic by the
dysfunctionality of their family as a child, and they either went to the
sidelines to track the flow of human events or they recoiled into an intensely
materialistic orientation. However, their destiny now is to share the “good
news” about the true nature of the Universe.

***************************************

“Time for a change.” They have reached a point where they can no longer
keep up their pattern of life any more. It is such an overwhelmingly
important matter that they literally had to leave body briefly, in order make
a new choice and/or new commitment regarding their destiny.

The more profound and dramatic/traumatic the experience and the more
extensive the aftermath, the bigger the need for change and/or the more
significant the destiny decision.

They are also notably “sensitive” to all manner of experiences and inputs,
including intuitive, psychic and “other-worldly,” though this may not have
been noticed by them prior to the experience. This type of situation usually
arises in persons who have had a severely traumatic and physically or
sexually abusive childhood.

“LIGHT-HEADEDNESS”

“Vague sense of unreality.” Reality has become overwhelming, and they

have lost their sense of center, stability and groundedness. There is no
feeling of balance and harmony, and mental confusion and flighty, scattered
thinking due to outside pressures has resulted.

They are refusing to look things squarely in the eye, and they don’t want to
have to deal with things as they are. They feel threatened by life’s demands
and realities. It feels very unsafe to them, and that it is impossible for them
to have joy in their life.

Now they are faced with a high intensity and/or high stakes decision,
commitment, undertaking or experience, and they are feeling overwhelmed,
overloaded and unable to cope. It is a pattern that got started in a denial-

673
dominated dysfunctional family in which they were required to function in
the face of chaos and the refusal to deal with reality.

LIMB PROBLEMS

“Don’t move!” They are having significant problems in mobility, flexibility

and activity. They either feel that they have to be extremely inhibited and
careful in all they do, or they are immobilized and unable to take action. It
arises from an intensely self-distrust-inducing family. (See the particular
limb(s) involved for more information also, see PARALYSIS)

LIPOMA (See FATTY TUMORS)

LIP PROBLEMS

“Keeping their mouth shut.” They have conflicts about expressing

themselves, and about what they know and feel. There is a large disparity
between what they experience and wish to express and what they say. They
are having real difficulties in the realm of attention and respect from other
people.

It is the result of a family in which “What will the neighbors think?” was
the paramount consideration. It was also a patriarchal and authoritarian
family that suppressed all forms of spontaneity and self-manifestation.

RIGHT LIP PROBLEMS

“Hoof-in-mouth concerns.” They are having issues over the proper way to
express themselves and/or to share or give.

CENTER LIP PROBLEMS

“Despair-freak-out.” They are experiencing depression and demoralization

over what they can expect out of life.

LEFT LIP PROBLEMS

“Don’t deserve.” There are conflicts over whether or what to want and to
receive.

674
UPPER LIP PROBLEMS

“Calamity-avoidance.” They have difficulties in expressing themselves and

in speaking out, for fear of “precipitating World War III.”

LOWER LIP PROBLEMS

“Poison apple.” They have a real reticence to receive and/or a distrust of

that which is coming to them.

“LISPING”

“Rejection-expecting.” Their social interface is laced with anticipations of

negative reactions to what they have to say. It is the result of significant
intolerance for who they are and to their informational inputs from their
family. They were, in effect, a pariah in their own dysfunctional family,
who couldn’t deal with the truths they put out.

LIVER PROBLEMS

“Cosmic double play.” Their Higher Self manifestation has been thrown off
balance by some sort of severe setback or by a catastrophic loss or event.
They therefore lack good sense, sanity, equilibrium and “normalcy” at the
moment. They also are having difficulties with discrimination, faith and
capacity for spiritual knowing. They are having an existential crisis around
philosophical, religious and cosmic issues. It is part of the process of
readying them for the manifestation of their intended destiny.

***************************************

“Deflated balloon.” They are having trouble standing up to what has to be

faced, and to rebuilding and replenishing their life force. They try to hide
from themselves, they won’t tell themselves the truth, they run away from
their issues, they duck out from under their problems, they won’t face
reality, and they are systematically not noticing what is going on in their
life.

675
They lack the psychological strength to engage in strategic planning and
practical execution, and to pull off the transformation in their life and
attitudes that is necessary at this time. They feel hapless, helpless and
hopeless, and they are convinced that they can’t handle life. They have a
severe suppressed underlying despondency, along with an overwhelming
despair.

They come from a severely demoralizingly dysfunctional family who

effectively undermined and prevented the development of their self-
sufficiency and life-support provision capabilities.

***************************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They feel like a “bad” person who has no
right to live or to have life-sustenance. Their experience is that there is
something wrong with this picture -- and that is that they are still in it. They
are plagued by continuous self-condemnation, self-attack, and intense regret
over things they have experienced or done.

They are the product of a significantly dysfunctional family who gave them
the constant message they have no right to support or sustenance, and that
they have to continuously contribute to justify their very existence.

***************************************

“Generalized resentment.” They are angry and confused about what their
life is all about. They have intense resentment and rage about lack of
recognition, about unjustified criticisms, and about having to support
themselves to such a degree. They are exasperated, judgmental, frustrated,
and they are full of primitive emotions like fear, depression, anger, worry,
anxiety, hate, self-disgust, hurt, need for power, greed, jealous
possessiveness, and critical attitudes.

They are full of feelings of being unjustly treated, and they harbor desires
for revenge. They are chronically complaining and finding justifications for
petty fault-finding, as a means of deceiving themselves. They are
systematically self-misleading and self-deluding to justify their attack

676
behaviors. They are the product of a severely dysfunctional, rageful and
blame-throwing family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE LIVER

“Fulminating fury.” They are a boiling cauldron of seething resentment of

the past, and they manifest an intense resistance to change. They are full of
fear, anger and hatred arising out of experienced powerlessness, self-doubts
and guilt, all of which are projected out as accusations of corruption and
exploitation.

They feel totally overloaded with demands and unable to deal with them. It
arose in a highly dysfunctional and enraging family who demanded far too
much and who instilled deepseated self-doubt and cope-ability-anxiety.

“LOCKED IN” SYNDROME (Paralyzed not fully sentient. From a stroke,

accident or whatever)

“Living a half life.” They had need in effect “going through the motions” of
living. Their experience was that they were fully involved, and indeed they
are likely to have had quite a plateful going, such as intense work-aholism,
serve-aholism, multiple irons in the fire, all the trappings of a full life, nut
with a deepseated sense of non-involvement and with a functional non-
availability at the full commitment level.

There is an underlying profound sense of endangerment and of a hostile

environment, to which they have reacted with an “undercover agent”
process of putting out all the signals of being there, but in fact they feel like
they don’t dare to be vulnerable, to commit to anything or to express who
they are really. They haven’t found out yet that “the war is over” and that
the world is not their family.

They have reached a point where they don’t want to stay, but they are afraid
to die. They can also be kept here by their profound guilt for what they
were doing and/or by fears in their intimates about losing them.

It is the resultant of growing up in a supremely subtly undermining and

hostile family who in effect weren’t there either, but who didn’t know it,

677
perhaps reflecting a pattern that extends back for generations.

“LONG QT” SYNDROME (Sudden severe cardiac arrhythmia, possibly

genetic)

“One strike and I’m out!” They feel that “the buck stops here,” and that
they are solely responsible, accountable and capable of handling everything.
They are the “lone stranger riding off into the sunset” who walks alone.

It is a pattern that got started intrauterine, when there was at least severe
ambivalence about their coming. It continued as the family reacted to them
as a resource to rely upon, instead of as a child needing nurturance, support,
protection, guidance and training.

LORDOSIS (Front curvature of the spine)

“Maturation-deflection.” They have a core conflict about being here,

especially concerning “growing up.” They have an inability to flow with the
support available in life. They are fearfully trying to hold onto old ideas.

They don’t trust life, and because of that, they feel deeply at risk. That, in
turn, leads to a certain lack of integrity, and to little courage of their
convictions, because of the potential consequences of alienating. They are
consequently carrying the burden of life single-handedly with a helpless
and hopeless feeling.

It reflects having had an overload of responsibility for themselves from a

very early age. It is also a result of their having been forced to capitulate,
and to bend to the will of a severely domineering parent in childhood.

This may or may not result in a tendency to buckle under pressure from
authority now. Indeed, there may even be a strong rebellious pattern
operating, if one of the parents tended to undermine the oppressiveness of
the other. However, in all cases, they bear the intense scars of the extremely
oppressive pressure of their childhood.

LOSS OF ABSTRACT THINKING FUNCTION

678
“I don’ wanna know!” They are into compulsively concrete control-mania,
and they are heavily denial-dominated and feeling-avoidant. They don’t
want to know what the meanings of things are.

It comes from a severely dysfunctional and stressful family in which they

had to develop moment-by-moment survival strategies, and in which
awareness was both intensely punished and deeply alarming.

So they concentrated on what was in front of them and ignored the rest.
While they were able to utilize the abstract function, they did not like to do
so, due to their early history, and that attitude has now resulted in its loss.

LOSS OF BODY AND HEAD HAIR

“Return to infancy.” It represents the repudiation of all passion, potency and

personhood, along with a retreat into innocence and reactivity. It is a
manifestation of an intense abandonment-annihilation-anxiety and
rejection-paranoia, along with severe competence-and cope ability-anxiety.
It tends to be precipitated by the immanence of a strong destiny-
development process possibility.

It comes from being heavily programmed not to be too threatening or self-

developing in an intensely conditionally accepting family who were highly
possessive and/or alarmed by their potency and potentials. (See HAIR
LOSS)

LOSS OF COORDINATION

“Oh no you don’t!” They have crossed the “forbidden line” into self-
commitment and destiny manifestation, and a long-ago implanted
injunction to the effect of, “If you ever violate this taboo, a hex on you!”
from their family has gone off. They were to never abandon the family by
bonding with relevant others, developing their capacities, or moving into
manifestation of their purpose. (See “AWKWARDNESS”)

LOSS OF EYEBROWS AND/OR EYELASHES

679
“Close to the chest.” They feel (consciously or unconsciously) that it is not
safe to express their feelings directly or in a public manner, given the
present circumstances. It should be noted that these circumstances are
tapping into an old, familiar feeling and strategy. They found out that letting
their family know where they were coming from was tantamount to
disaster, particularly in important matters where strong feelings are
involved.

LOSS OF MENTAL FUNCTIONS

“Hell no, I won’t go along!” They are engaged in a refusal to deal with the
world as it is, out of an enraged helplessness and hopelessness. They feel
overwhelmed by the requirements of life and unable to cope any more.
There is a great deal of bitterness and disgust with the Universe and with
the “Home Office” (All that Is). They are having an “I’m taking my marbles
and going home!” reaction.

This is a pattern that started early in life, when they had to face an uncaring
and even hostilely demanding environment, which had a demoralizing
effect on them. Their response to this generated a setting up of a “self-
fulfilling prophecy effect” in which they repeatedly found themselves in
repetitions of the formative environment. They kept up as long as they
could, and now they have decided that enough is enough.

***************************************

“Phasing out.” They are doing a stage-by-stage exit from this plane. They
are spending a lot of time in the other realm, processing what has gone on
and “going to school” out there. They periodically “check in” here, and they
then suddenly become lucid for a while. Then they “head on out” again.

It seems to be related to a control trip in which they don’t trust anyone or

anything unless they are at the throttle. That, in turn, comes from growing
up in an incompetent, dysfunctional and untrustworthy family or in a family
which treated them as the “intimate enemy.” (See ALZHEIMER’S
DISEASE; SENILITY)

LOSS OF THE SENSE OF TOUCH

680
“Shut down.” They have disengaged from contact with the world around
them because it has become too painful to tolerate. It is due to their having
had their boundaries violently invaded on the emotional (and perhaps the
physical) level throughout their childhood. This left them “shell-shocked,”
and they were unable to take the “slings and arrows of outrageous fortune”
any longer.

“LOU GHERIG’S DISEASE” (Degeneration of the spinal cord and the

muscles)

“I don’t dare!” They are experiencing severe annihilation-anxiety around

the issue of seeking, manifesting and especially acknowledging success.
They have the utter conviction that they are the “turd of the Universe,” and
that they don’t have any worth whatsoever. They deny their success, and
they are totally unwilling to accept their self-worth.

They are in effect completely immobilized by betrayal avoidance, in that

the family, the mother in particular, conveyed to them very clearly that any
form of self-manifestation, success in the world and commitment elsewhere
would destroy their family.

It got started at a time when there was, in their experience, no difference

between their mother and the Universe, so that in effect, they would be
committing “Deicide” if they seek success or if they recognize their worth -
- they would be destroying God and all Its creation. So to avoid that
“ultimate calamity,” they are sacrificing themselves on the altar of “filial
piety.”

LOW BIRTH WEIGHT

“Broken-hearted.” They are abandonment-paranoid and rejection-expecting.

They have little or no sense of personal worth or deservingness of love, as if
they lost out in the “love sweepstakes” altogether. Their feeling is that they
are “unfit for human consumption,” and that no one could, would or should
ever be there with and for them. It is the result of emotional
impoverishment, due to personal or resource poverty and/or maternal
rejection.

681
LOWER HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“Look!...Up in the sky!” They are engaged in a rejection of Earthly

existence and of the passions. It is a retreat into intellectualism, idealism or
estheticism. They are ungrounded, unbalanced, lacking in solidity and roots,
unstable and unable to provide practical support.

They are intensely withdrawn, private, shy, reserved and contact-avoidant.

They tend to be spacey, full of unfounded assumptions, reality-avoidant,
flighty, and impractical. As a result, they are dependent, homeostasis-
emphasizing, security-seeking, and static, with a detached calmness and
predictability of manifestation.

They refuse to change the direction they are taking, and they systematically
avoid awareness of their relation to the environment. They tend to “shine
on,” to put out a projection that is not who they are. In effect, they don’t
want to be here. It arises from a self-immersed family who was never there
for them, and who just let them “do their thing.”

“LOW MILK SYNDROME” (Malnutrition-caused strokes, blood clots and

other oxygen deprivation-caused brain damage in the infant, due to low
breast milk.)

“Who invited YOU!?” She is extremely unclear on the concept of being a

mother -- of this child or at all. She feels totally unprepared for the
responsibility and the requirements. She may feel in over her head, or she
may be highly unwilling to be a mother. In any case, it reflects the rather
strong “unwelcome wagon” reaction to her own birth that she experienced
at the hands of her mother.

***************************************

“I want out.” They have a rather strong lack of interest in and rejection of
life. They have a subconscious death wish based on a guilty conscience that
got started in the womb, even before the lack of mother’s milk. Their
experience is that they have no right to be here taking up resources and
space, because “God said so.” It is the result of the intense maternal
ambivalence or rejection of having a child or of having this child.

682
LOW PLATELETS (Difficulty clotting blood)

“Over-responsibility.” They have a sense that they are here to make the
world all better, and that they should care-take everything and everyone. It
comes from having grown up in a situation of many unmet needs for
everyone, and they rose to the challenge to the point where they have some
difficulty limiting demands made on them or in taking care of their own
needs.

LOW SPERM COUNT

“Not this time around.” They don’t need to go through the parenting
experience, and they are therefore are unconsciously choosing not to sustain
the procreation process.

***************************************

“Are you kidding?!” They have had a long-standing pattern of monastic

celibacy in past lives, and they intend to continue the tradition.

***************************************

“Karma.” They have a past life history of severe abuse and even murder of
children. They are being required to work off that karma before they will be
allowed to parent again.

***************************************

“Inadequate to the cause.” They are having severe self-questioning and self-
denigration problems. They are highly prone to blame themselves for any
let-downs, setbacks or failure that they encounter. They come from a
denigrating, wrong-making and undermining family.

***************************************

“In over their head.” They are experiencing great fear and resistance to the
process of life. There is a considerable amount of tension, anxiety,
emotional conflict and traumatic shock involved in their life history. They

683
are heavily into competence-anxiety, self-distrust and self-inhibition. It
arises from a “blame-throwing” dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Male shame.” They feel guilty for being a member of the male race, and
they unconsciously do not want to pass on their “sinfulness.” They are the
product of a severely “tripod-raging” mother -- she had the irresistible urge
to kick or even more seriously attack anything with three legs.

***************************************

“Cold-hearted.” It is a case of egotism, selfishness and dishonest feelings

being expressed in an ignorant manner. In effect, they don’t want to be a
parent for all the wrong reasons (or maybe for the right reasons, given who
they are). They are hard, harsh, cold, judgmental, negative assumptive,
angry and blaming. They are manifesting a primitive manner of functioning
learned in a similar family.

LOW WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT

“Forget me!” There has been a loss of self-commitment, due to a sense of

worthlessness being activated by current circumstances that replay in
updated form the experiences of childhood. It is an old, familiar theme or a
“return of the repressed.” In either case, it is the result of being given the
message by the way they were raised that they aren’t worth a hill of beans.

“LUMBAGO” (Backache at the rear of the groin region)

“All by myself.” There is a feeling of injustice and of being over-burdened

and under-supported. Indeed, there is a strong sense of insufficient support,
along with a considerable resentment over that. There is a fear of financial
failure and money, they feel at risk on the survival level, and there are
concerns about the need for protection. This can be either current or
chronic.

They were more or less left to their own devices from early on, and their
family was not able to provide them basic emotional support. There is a

684
significant need for nurturance being displayed with this type of problem.

***************************************

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They are full of self-doubt, competence-anxiety and

worth concerns, and they lack the will or strength to overcome the obstacles
they face. They are success-avoidant out of fear of abandonment-
annihilation built in during their early childhood. They are the product of a
rejecting, competence-undermining and blame-throwing dysfunctional
family.

***************************************

“Over-burdened.” They feel overloaded with excessive demands, because

this was the pattern in their childhood. They find this painful, heavy and
they want to run away, as well as suppressing a desire to attack. They
therefore are into over-control for fear of release of aggression and the
misuse and abuse of power.

***************************************

“Enmeshed.” They are guilt ridden about sexuality, due to sex-ploitative

parenting and to demands that they never commit to themselves or anyone
or anything outside the family. They are over-responsible, self-condemning,
depressed and despairing, due to feeling trapped in the “tie that grinds”
from an engulfing family.

RIGHT SIDE “LUMBAGO”

“No support.” There are conflicts over the nature and/or availability of
environmental support systems and supplies. The feeling is that there is not
what is needed out there for them in one form or another, and they have
little or no trust of the environment to provide what they need. It arose in a
dysfunctional family who were not able to provide their basic life support
systems and resources much of the time.

MIDDLE AREA “LUMBAGO”

685
“Calamity-concern.” There is a considerable amount of annihilation-anxiety
and survival-alarm. Their feeling is that they are here on borrowed time,
and that there is the real possibility of being “found out.” There is also some
“run amok-anxiety” -- the fear that they may “lose it” over their situation of
non-support and deprivation. It derives from strong experiences of
unacceptability or unwelcomeness from very early on.

LEFT SIDE “LUMBAGO”

“Island unto themselves.” They have an inability to accept or to utilize

intimate emotional support and basic need-meeting. They are excessively
self-sufficient in a “sealed unit” pattern. They have a significant trust of the
Universe problem, due to early deprivation and untrustworthiness of their
maternal and intimate environment.

“LUMP IN THE THROAT” (Chronic)

“Grief-gagging.” They do not trust the process of life, and they feel very
unsafe. They have a real fearfulness about expressing themselves, in
anticipation of dire consequences. They have been alone on their own with
little or no protection, support or sustenance all their life.

They come from a selfish, exploitative, suppressive and dysfunctional

family who systematically misunderstood and misused any sharing of
where they were at, and who lived a “magical mystery tour” lifestyle while
paying no attention to the individual’s needs.

LUNG PROBLEMS

“Barking up the wrong tree.” They tend to get into consuming passionate
commitments that lead nowhere, and to get into repeated devastating
unrequited love situations. They have a sensitive mind and a very strong
sense of justice, righteousness and generosity that frequently leads them
into blind alleys and exploitative situations and relationships.

They come from a dysfunctional family in which they held a parental role
that led to their repeatedly trying to rescue them from their self-defeating
patterns.

686
 ***************************************

“Deprivation City.” They have a real difficulty in taking in prana, chi, ki,
élan vitale, and love or life energy, as a function of their prideful brutalizing
misuse of energy in past lives. They have an inability to renew to the breath
of life, along with a lack of enthusiasm and zeal for living. They have a real
inability to take in life, and they don’t feel worthy of living life fully.

They are suffering from depression and chronic grief, because they are
deeply afraid of taking in life energy. They are joy-avoidant and happiness-
squashing, out of a fear of the Universe. They lack cosmic, community and
conjugal contact. They feel unworthy of living fully, and they are alone, sad
and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance or approval.

They are once again in a smothering and stifling environment, with a

resulting sense that life is dull and monotonous. They are the product of a
withholding and non-accepting family.

***************************************

“Self-suppression.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, unexpressed passions, strong desires and emotions. They don’t
have any sense of freedom or the right or ability to communicate their
feelings. This was generated by a self-immersed and dysfunctional family
who were exploitative, shame-inducing and enmeshed.

RIGHT LUNG PROBLEMS

“Exploitation-paranoia.” They are struggling with guilt over real and/or

imagined abuses of energy and resources.

LEFT LUNG PROBLEMS

“Don’t need!” They have shame over having needs for energy and
resources. (See EMPHYSEMA; PLEURISY; PNEUMONIA;
TUBERCULOSIS)

LUPUS

687
“Deep emotional guilt and shame.” They have a deep self-hatred and desire
for punishment that is so overwhelming that death seems preferable to
dealing with forgiving or loving themselves. They are into self-suppressing
power-avoidance and expression-squashing. They are intensely self-
rejecting and self-disapproving in a resentful self-disgust reaction.

They seek to appear positive and cheerful, but inside they are deeply
depressed. They are full of angry punishment-deservingness feelings and
self-destructive motivations and manifestations.

They are capitulating and giving up to an extreme underlying abandonment-

depression. They literally feel that it’s better to die than to stand up for
themselves, and they are in essence giving up on life.

It is the result of being massively rejected, accused and wrong-made by a

punitive dysfunctional family with a highly self-immersed, self-serving, and
blame-throwing mother, who gave them strong “If it weren’t for you...”
messages, usually while simultaneously depending on them in a “role-
reversal” or “associate parent” pattern.

LYME DISEASE (Tick-transmitted failure of the immune system)

“Sealed unit.” They are an “urban hermit” -- an achieve-aholic, and a self-

denying performance-maniac. They feel that they have to take care of
everything because no one else will or they’ll do it all wrong. They are so
caught up in taking care of business and running the show that they have
real trouble with intimacy, vulnerability and emotional commitment.
Underneath all this, they are support-starved, frustrated and resentful.

It all got started in a “never good enough” parenting situation, in which they
were put on a very conditional love basis -- they had to “perform for their
breakfast.” However, they never seemed to come up to snuff, so there is a
subconscious, subtle and subterranean self-disgust and lack of self-
confidence. What happened is they became hooked to the “tie that grinds”
in an engulfed symbiosis with their parents, who, in turn, functionally relied
on them to rescue them.

688
Now they are in the seemingly untenable position of having to give up the
“quest for the Golden Orb” or the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval”
and the parent-rescue and single-handed “Atlas” trip, or they will not make
it.

LYMPHOMA (Cancer of the lymph system)

“Unable to forgive and forget.” They are sitting on deepseated resentment

and resignation. They have always had to be “running on empty” with
insufficient equipment. They have a growing feeling of “What’s the use?”
along with an abiding anger about their whole situation.

They have always had to suffer silently and to stuff their sorrow. They feel
that they have always come up a day late and a dollar short as a function of
some inherent vileness or evilness. They therefore have not felt the right to
request or require, much less to complain or explain about their situation.
Yet at the same time, they are enslaved to negativity in their thinking and
expectations.

They have little ability to defend themselves against attack from themselves
or from outside agents or forces. They have a poorly developed ability to
self-nurture and to fend for themselves.

It is the result of a severely shame-inducing dysfunctional family who

conveyed that they can expect nothing but the very worst.

LYMPH SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“Running on empty.” They are receiving a warning that the mind needs to
be re-centered on the essentials of life, namely the need for love and joy in
their life. They are handicapped by an inability to release past memories
and other wastes such as harmful habits and traits, or to defend themselves
against negative thoughts.

They are blocking and/or denying their emotions, thereby leaving

themselves unprotected and vulnerable, with no immunity to external and
internal poisons and attacking agents. They feel no sense of acceptance and
love from their environment. They feel that they are inadequate to the

689
cause, with the result that they have no felt need or motivation in a lazy,
being-tired-of-it-all reaction to someone or some situation or some set of
circumstances.

Their emotional body is in disrepair, and they have real difficulties in how
well they are taking care of their own needs, getting nurtured, and handling
their negative feelings about themselves. They are the product of a shame-
inducing dysfunctional family who conveyed very clearly to them they have
no right to love and joy, and that “There’s no joy in Bloodville.”

LYMPHATIC VESSEL PROBLEMS

“Deep resentment.” They feel that their life is lacking in peace, love and
they are quite bitter and angry about that. They come from an unloving,
non-supportive and exploitative family.

Section 12

690
691
L

692
335

693
694
L

336

337

338

339

340

341

342

343

695
344

345

346

347

348

349

350

351

696
352

353

354

355

356

357

358

359

697
MALARIA (Intense fever caused by parasites)

“Out to get me.” They are significantly out of sync with the Universe, with
nature, with life, and with themselves. They feel totally unsafe, and they
have very little trust of the Universe. They feel it is a “me vs. everything
else” type of situation. It is the result of being the “sane one” in an
untouchable dysfunctional family who were quite invasive with them.

MALE ERECTILE DISORDER

“Can’t get it up.” They are manifesting the effects of the “tie that grinds,”
arising from possessive parenting from their mother and/or from a history
of aversive experiences in the sexual arena.

“MALE MENOPAUSE” (Post-retirement depression)

“Fifth wheel.” They feel that they no longer have any function, purpose or
direction. They also feel identityless, useless and worthless without their
community contribution capability. They feel like an unlovable obsolete
piece of equipment. It is re-activating profound feelings of unacceptability
and worthlessness arising from a rejecting and/or perfectionistic
performance-demanding patriarchal household.

“MALE PROBLEMS”

“Hyper-eroticism.” They have an underlying deep sense of sexual

inadequacy, and therefore of true masculinity. They are compulsively
promiscuous, about which they have a lot of guilt and shame. They can’t
forget or let go of their miserable memories of all their failed relationships.
They feel unfulfilled in love and intimacy, and they are deeply resentful of
that. They are the product of an enmeshed, possessive and intimacy-distrust
inducing mothering.

MALNUTRITION

“I want out!” They are showing a lack of interest in and a rejection of life.
They have a subconscious death wish that is based on a guilty conscience.

698
They are inclined to spiteful self-destruction in an “I’ll show them! I’ll
make them sorry!” pattern. They are the product of a severely
dysfunctional, blame-throwing and shame-inducing family. (See
ANOREXIA)

“MARASMUS” (Protein and carbohydrate deprivation reaction and/or a

severe maternal deprivation result -- “failure to thrive”)

“Maternal deprivation.” It is a severe devastation reaction in an infant

whose mother is doing unto others what was done unto her, only in more
extreme form. She has no inner or experience-based resources with which
to carry out the process of nurturing.

***************************************

“Ultimate atonement.” They are unconsciously convinced they don’t

deserve to take up resources or to have their needs met, and they have now
come to the conclusion that it is time to conclude the story. It is the result of
intense intrauterine rejection and/or early deprivation.

MASTADENITIS; MASTITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE

MAMMARY GLAND(S))

MASTOIDITIS (Inflammation of the bone behind the ear -- usually in

children)

“Hear no evil.” They have strong desire not to hear the hostility, conflict
and aggression that going on around them. Their fear is infecting their
understanding, and their anger and frustration with the situation has become
acute. They feel out of the loop and left out of the care circle of their family.
It is, of course, the product of a dysfunctional family in which their needs
were often overlooked or belittled or they became the grounds for blame
and accusation.

RIGHT MASTOID

“Where is it going?” They have fear and anger over the implications for
future developments of the hostility in their environment.

699
LEFT MASTOID

“More and worse.” There is fear and anger over the treatment they have
received, and over its implications for their future.

MEASLES (Infectious viral disease)

“They’re after me!” They feel unsafe, betrayed, rejected and attacked. They
have concluded that they can’t be themselves, and they are in grief about
that. It is the outcome of a self-immersed family system who reacted to
them on a convenience-concern basis.

MELANOMA (Skin cancer)

“Thwarted.” They have a very strong feeling of frustrated plans and felt
blockages by other people and/or circumstances. They feel threatened in
some way, and they are letting things “get under their skin.” They have
strong longings that they haven’t been able to realize, and there is deep hurt
and long-standing resentment. They are the product of a frustratingly
dysfunctional family who constantly prevented them from achieving their
goals.

***************************************

“What’s the use?” There is a profound grief that is eating away at them.
They are carrying deep-seated hatreds of the world around them and of the
people in it. They feel that they are in a hostile environment that involves
attempts to penetrate their defenses.

Underpinning all this is an unwillingness to forgive and forget the past.

They feel that they are in a rotten situation, and that they always have been.
They hate it, and see no way out. They are afraid to express their rage about
it, or to find an outlet for their creative energy. Their family was
demoralizingly dysfunctional and invasive, and they nurtured grudges and
resentments.

***************************************

700
“Suppressed resentment.” They are a conservative controller and a feeling-
avoiding denier who is experiencing deep disappointment while never being
able to let love in. They are suffering from loss and hopelessness, morbid
fears, abandonment-depression, and deprivation-resentment. They have
unresolved hate, revenge desires, envy, jealousy and anger that are
expressed subtly, subconsciously and subterraneanly. The whole thing is the
result of severely critical parenting and of systematic victimization in
childhood.

MEMORY PROBLEMS

“Chessboard effect.” They are undergoing a major transformation and

healing that involves the re-programming of their “bio-computer” -- all the
way back to the beginning. It produces a “pardon my dust” thorough-going
shake-up of the entire operational system as everything is rearranged and
changed.

It is as if someone whose name starts with “G” came along and gave a great
big “Whap!” to the underside of your 3-dimensional chess game called your
ego and your life. All the pieces are up in the air in disarray -- including the
long term, the short term and even your procedural memory. Relax. You’re
falling together, not falling apart. You’re going sane, not going insane.

***************************************

“Don’t look back!” They operate out of an awareness-avoidant orientation

arising out of a severe sense of dread over what they would find back there.
It is an exaggerated version of denial or repression arising from a highly
traumatic childhood in which much that happened was intensely
frightening, and where they felt powerless to do anything about it. So they
took up the habit of “just forgetting about it” after it was over. Now this
pattern is generalizing, due to some form of current severe stress.

MENIERE’S DISEASE (Affecting the organs of balance, leading to violent

dizziness, severe nausea and intense vomiting.)

“Confusion City.” They are suffering from severe disorientation and

feelings of being thrown off base. They have a strong sense of being at risk

701
in a confusing and potentially dangerous world. They don’t have a clear
sense of direction or of the nature of what is happening around them. They
are sick and tired of all this, and they aren’t willing to put up with demands
for more responsibility and accountability. They are the product of a
“magical misery tour” chaotic dysfunctional family in which they were
expected to be the “sane one,” but where sanity was not attainable. (See
ABASIA)

MENINGITIS (Inflammation of the lining of the brain and the spinal cord)

“Pariah/outcast complex.” They are convinced that they are unacceptable to

human society. They feel attacked for their beingness, their personality.
They are enraged at life and inflamed in their thinking, and they are full of
blame and frustrated fury. They were regarded and treated as the
“Hunchback of Notre Dame” by their family, who, however, at the same
time systematically trained them to be a scapegoat. (See BRAIN
PROBLEMS)

MENOPAUSE PROBLEMS

“Yesterday’s newspaper.” They have a fear of no longer being wanted or of

having no usefulness. There is a sense of an ending of their purpose for
being here as a woman, and they are therefore experiencing a sense of loss
of direction and fulfillment. They are deeply afraid that they are no longer
lovable and desirable, and that they will be rejected.

They are experiencing significant self-rejection and fear of aging. They

have a strong sense of not being “good enough,” and they feel “out of the
loop.” They are therefore resisting the flow of life and the natural change
process, especially if it indicates a lessening of acceptability and the
possibility of abandonment and isolation.

It comes from having been placed heavily on conditional love as a child, so

that they became convinced that they had no inherently lovable qualities,
and that they had to continuously “earn” their acceptance.

MENSTRUAL PROBLEMS

702
“She-jection.” They are engaged in rejection of their femininity, along with
power-avoidance and self-disapproval. They have guilt and fear about
sexuality, and they have the belief that the genitals are sinful and/or dirty.
They feel no self-respect or enjoyment as a woman. It is an outcome of a
patriarchal and possible severely dysfunctional family. (See LACK OF
MENSTRUATION; PAINFUL MENSTRUATION)

“MISSED PERIODS”

“I don’ wanna!” They have an intense ambivalence about the

generative/creative function. They really want to have a child and/or to
manifest their creativity, but they are afraid of the responsibilities and
ramifications involved. It is the product of a “Peter Panella-inducing,
“eternal girl”-desiring, “Keep her around the old homestead” parenting
pattern.

MULTIPLE MENSTRUATIONS OR EXCESSIVE MENSTRUAL

BLEEDING

“She-jection.” There is intense ambivalence about her femininity or her

feminineness. She is angry or ashamed about being a woman in part, and
that is acting up now. It comes from having been made wrong for being a
woman -- “We (I) wanted a boy!” -- “Isn’t that just like a woman?” -- “God
dammit, why can’t you think like a man?!” -- “Women are the cause of all
the world’s troubles.” -- “It’s a man’s world,” etc.

***************************************

“No way, Jose!” They are engaged in fertility/creativity-avoidance. They

are afraid of or resistant to the generative function and its responsibilities
and ramifications. Something in her current life is activating this issue at the
present time. It arises from being made to be afraid of her intuition,
creativity, and/or generativity by her family. Or they over-indulged and
under-required her to prevent her from being able to “grow away.”

***************************************

703
“Peter Panella.” She is refusing to grow up and become a woman, wanting
to remain a little girl who is “taken care of all of” all her life. This
imprinting is now surfacing in her life. It is the result of either over-
indulgent/under-requiring parenting or of being given the message that to
grow up and grow away is total family-betrayal.

MERCURY POISONING (Nervous system problems, bone damage)

“Red alert.” They are having real problems with mental and/or emotional
experiences of weakness and vulnerability. Life’s vicissitudes and
difficulties have undermined their sense of sanity. There is a disruption of
the flow of communication, in the form of input-deflecting and/or
expression-suppressing, with the result that information-transmission,
action-initiation and behavior-facilitation have been effectively derailed.

They are freaked out and distrusting of the universe, and they feel that they
have to have “hands on control” of everything. They are the product of an
untrustworthy dysfunctional and enmeshed family.

***************************************

“Careening cannon.” Their current situation is giving them the

overwhelming sense that everything is thoroughly bollixed up, and they feel
that they are devastating the environment and that they are endangering
themselves seriously at the same time. They have ended up feeling that they
“caused World War II” and that they might in fact “cause World War III.”
They feel that they are back in their severely dysfunctional family, in which
they were the only “sane one” upon whom everything and everyone
depended.

“METH MOUTH” (Grayish brown, twisting, rotting, falling out teeth

caused by meth-amphetamine abuse. Due to dry mouth lack of saliva to
combat bacteria, along with super-thirst leading to soda pop abuse.)

“Fulminating fury.” They have a bad case of suppressed rage, hard anger,
and potential violence. There is a paranoid orientation, and they are prone
to have a hateful attitude. They try and “clear their tubes” with the

704
substance. They are also grossly unable to make effective decisions in life,
which leads to constant catastrophic situations that refuel their fury.

They were reared with much emotional invasion and abuse, along with
profound emotional neglect, lack of nurturance and frequently physical
violence.

***************************************

“Love is a poison apple.” They have a deep disappointment and disgust

over lack of support and not being able to tell it like it is. They have decided
that there is no such thing as real nourishment. They are not ready to accept
what the universe is providing them.

They are therefore sealed off from taking in any proffered support or any
new ideas. Everything fails to “pass the taste test” as far as they are
concerned -- they want to stay in their comfort zone. They have become
contemptuously closed-minded, set in their opinions.

It is the outcome of a highly negative experience with their untrustworthy,

denial-dominated, dysfunctional family and their subsequent standins.

MICRO-PLASM (An ancient micro-organism that uses the “colony mind”

to deflect all interventions, including antibiotics. Once you have it, it recurs
periodically, precipitating respiratory difficulties, coughing, etc.) Oddly
enough, an old shamanic formula relieves the symptoms if you rub it on the
bottoms of your feet as you put on socks each night to keep the salve off
sheets. The remedy is called Vick’s Vapor-Rub”)

“I don’t deserve to exist.” They tend to feel highly unsafe in the world, and
they fear taking life in fully. They feel unworthy of truly living life, and
they are prone to feel alone, sad and non-belonging, with little sense of
acceptance of approval. They are joy-avoidant and happiness-rejecting. It is
the resultant of untrustworthy, depriving and/or self-immersed parenting.

MIGRAINE HEADACHE

705
“Love-starvation.” Longing for mother’s love or that of someone close.
Their love inputs came out of the mother’s priorities and concerns in a
patriarchal household, not unconditionally or in response to their needs.
They therefore have an abiding fear of rejection and abandonment, in
response to which they developed a perfectionistic compensation attempt --
trying to “earn” their right to love.

***************************************

“Driven.” They feel they have to “hump” to make it in life, and that they
have to “make something of themselves,” to accomplish something. They
therefore drive themselves, and they strive to get things done. It is a life-
and-death imperative feeling that they have to achieve the goal, to
accomplish the outcome.

However, when they complete the project, it sets the stage for the
realization that this achievement isn’t going to bring the desperately longed
for unconditional maternal love either, and it sets the stage for another
“Golden Orb”-pursuing project. That, in turn, sets off the headache. They
are the product of a withholding and performance-demanding mother.

***************************************

“Overload.” They feel overwhelmed with information and unable to

integrate it. They are having an intense but repressed rage reaction to the
situation. It is as if they are being demanded to do the impossible with
nothing, and they are extremely angry about it. They can’t handle the
ordinary requirements and stresses of life. They are prone to denial and
awareness-avoidance, due to their dysfunctional family history.

***************************************

“Frustrated.” They feel that something has to be achieved or done, that

something is being demanded of them. There is a good deal of fear and/or
resistance to being able to fulfill that demand. A goal has to be reached, and
the thought of it creates pain. They have an introverted feeling of
incompetence arising from perfectionistic performance-demanding
parenting.

706
 ***************************************

“Compulsive conscience.” They are pious, staunch and conscientiously

uncompromising. They are also rigid, intolerant and duty-dominated. They
have an exacting, achieving, “laying everything out in grids, charts and
lists” approach. They are “chore-oriented” to the max. It arose from a
patriarchal perfectionistic family.

***************************************

“Derailed destiny.” They have a pronounced feeling of having been

prevented or blocked from achieving what they set out to accomplish,
whether in a particular project or with their life. There are unfulfilled plans
that are causing them great pain. It is an old, familiar feeling arising from
their dysfunctional family background.

***************************************

“Fuck off!” They have an intense dislike of being “driven” by external

demands and they are resisting the flow of life. As a result, they are
suffering from nervous strain generated by the requirements and
responsibilities of life. They want to do things their way, at their pace,
according to their standards, and under their control.

It is a “rebellious child” pattern generated by an authoritarian household in

which the mother undermined the system, and who subtly or not-so-subtly
encouraged them to rebel as their way of “earning” her love.

***************************************

“Worthless turd.” They are suffering from sublimated emotions and sexual
fears arising from “smother-loving” sex-ploitation by their mother. They are
guilt-grabbing, accident-prone, and self-destructive, out of an unconscious
feeling that they have caused and deserved the invasive violation. They are
hypersensitive to criticism and non-expressive of negative evaluations, lest
they be rejected. Events that activate helpless/hapless/hopeless feelings are
often the precipitants of the migraine attack.

707
 ***************************************

“Road block.” There is a big impediment to the flow of their life that has to
be changed. It is an impediment that is a childhood-acquired pattern that
was an adaptation to a dysfunctional family -- like getting sick, success-
deflecting, self-invalidating, intimacy-incompetence feelings, and such. It
was a very broad decision about themselves that limits them severely that
has to be re-decided now, in no uncertain terms.

***************************************

“Air head.” They are frightened of the requirements, events and experiences
associated with the more earthy aspects of life, such as sexuality,
aggression, and feelings, and so they seek to “hide in their head.” It is the
result of growing up in a highly repressive and rationalistic household. (See
HEADACHES)

“MISCARRIAGE” (Spontaneous abortion)

“Not now -- Later.” There is a profound sense of mistiming, of really

serious consequences of the child’s coming at this point. The parents of the
child are not at peace with each other and/or the circumstances are not right.
There is a strong fear of the future in the mother. There is also a deep
apprehension of the upcoming responsibilities generated by a severely
dysfunctional family in which they had to carry a lot of the load.

In most cases, the visiting soul only wanted this early period experience. In
some cases, they themselves decide that the circumstances aren’t right, and
they opt to come back later. In a few cases, they decide that the
circumstances aren’t ever going to be appropriate for them, and they move
on. (See INFERTILITY; STERILITY)

MISSING PULSE; NO PULSE DETECTABLE (AT TIMES)

“Inner sanctum.” They are pulled into their inner core in strategic retreat
from everything. Their feeling is that “Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t
mean they’re NOT out to get you!” They feel very much at risk in the

708
world, and they are not allowing anything to “get at” them or to “get to”
them.

This can be situational and/or chronic, but in either case, their childhood
home was highly invasive and untrustworthy, such that they had to develop
the process of “shining on” to a world class art, as they pretended to be
vulnerable and involved while actually being in deep retreat from the
virulence and violence (physical and/or emotional) of their severely
dysfunctional family.

MITOCHONDRIAL MYOPATHY (Progressive muscle disorder that

deprives the body of energy)

“Why bother?” They are resistant to new experiences, and they are refusing
to move in life. Unsettling memories are surfacing, and they must confront
issues that have been long put off. They are having great difficulty
coordinating the execution of things and integrating ideas of what is wanted
to be accomplished with the pragmatic results they are getting. They have
trouble dealing with the feelings and issues associated with success, and
they have little sense of competence and confidence. They have a sense of
being inadequate, incompetent and ultimately uninterested.

They have lost their sense of purpose, and they have gone into an
amotivational syndrome. There is a growing weariness with life, an inner
tiredness because of having to cope or keep going. It comes from having
grown up in a chronically severely dysfunctional family. They have reached
the point where their experience is, “Enough, already!”

MITTLESCHMERTZ (Literally: “middle pain” -- pain at ovulation)

“Peter Panella.” It represents an unwillingness to grow up and be an adult

female, arising from possessive, over-protective and/or under-requiring
parenting. They wanted to “keep her around the old homestead” as their
“private preserve,” and so they generated compulsive immaturity.

***************************************

709
“I’ve had it!” They have a resentment of femininity, of maternity and/or of
the patriarchy. They feel restricted or required of, and they resist it. It is a
function of “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything with three
legs) passed on from their mother or from direct experience of exploitation,
sex-ploitation or oppression from their father and/or society at large.

MONILIASIS (Fungus infection of the mucous membranes mouth, throat

and vagina) (Candidiasis)

“Stick it up your...” They have a deep distrust of and disgust with the
resources the world has to offer. They have a “love is a poison apple” and
“The war is NOT over!” attitude, and they are “hunkering down in the
bunker,” hanging on to old tried and true strategies of self-containment and
self-sustenance. It arises from untrustworthy parenting in a severely
dysfunctional family.

“MONITOR FATIGUE” (Computer screen viewing disorder)

“One track mind.” They become so immersed in what they are viewing they
get lost in it, resulting in eye strain and muscle fatigue. It is a characteristic
of how they live their life -- a kind of “lost in the moment” pattern. It is the
result of having to “psyche out the situation” on an on-going basis in their
unpredictable and uninterpretable dysfunctional family.

MONKEY POX (Fever, headache, cough, painful rash traveling all over the
body)

“Moral cretin.” There is intense rage about restrictions, along with rage at
themselves for bringing these restrictions on themselves. They are highly
resentful about rules, regulations and environmental suppression and
oppression. They are also convinced that at some level, they deserve the
restrictions, and they even take some measure of pleasure out of the “just
desserts punishment.”

They are full of generalized malaise and contempt, but they are the worst on
themselves. They have a great deal of self-disgust and self-hatred for being
what they are, and deep inside, they feel they must suffer as “atonement”

710
for their “violations of the moral order.” It all stems from a highly
oppressive, shame-inducing, blame-throwing and accusatory family.

MONONUCLEOSIS; MONO (Glandular fever)

“Enough, already!” They are an angry achieve-aholic who is sick and tired
of pressures from higher ups and/or from significant others to accomplish
beyond their desires or abilities. It can also be a romance or relationship
that is hard to handle, due to excessive demands. It is the result of growing
up in a dependent family who placed them in a parental role from early on.

***************************************

“Burned out.” They are facing a crisis without solution, and this, in
conjunction with an “up to the eyebrows” situation has led to a generalized
malaise, ennui, torpor, lack of concern and no longer caring for themselves.

It is an old, familiar feeling, being as they are the product of an implacably

dysfunctional family in which they were the “sane one” and the “disaster-
deflector.” Time for a change of premises, lifestyle and commitments.

***************************************

“Don’t deserve.” They feel somehow lacking in what it takes to make it,
that they are in some way unworthy. They were subjected to deprivation,
neglect, accusation and/or rejection from early on, and they ended up
believing that it’s all they can expect.

***************************************

“Surrounded by takers!” They are angry at not receiving the love and
appreciation they deserve. They are forever putting out huge amounts of
contribution, commitment and concern, all of which is met with more
demands and no acknowledgement. They come from an exploitative, self-
immersed and non-appreciative family, and they are pulling in “standins for
the cast.”

“MORNING SICKNESS” (Nausea and vomiting in early pregnancy)

711
“Implication-anxiety.” They are having second thoughts about the
magnitude of the undertaking they are involved with. It activates a sense of
queasiness and overwhelm. It is re-activating their childhood experience of
having had to, in effect, parent their family, or of their never having had real
nurturing. (See PREGNANCY COMPLICATIONS)

MOTION SICKNESS

“Rudderlessness feelings.” They have a fear of not being in control, the

thought being that they and perhaps everyone else will, be annihilated if
they aren’t personally handling the situation. It is a pattern that developed in
a disorganized dysfunctional family in which they had to take charge of
things or all hell would break loose.

MOUNTAIN SICKNESS (Due to low air pressure)

“Invisible deprivation.” Their experience is that they are somehow not

getting the life-sustaining support they need, yet there is no visible cause for
it. Everything looks fine. This is a re-creation of their early history, in which
they never got what they needed, yet the observables were all in the right
place and/order. It is the result of a subtle and subconscious selfishness and
subterranean sabotaging dysfunctional family system. (See ALTITUDE
SICKNESS)

MOUTH PROBLEMS

“Love is a poison apple.” They have a deep disappointment and disgust

over lack of support and not being able to tell it like it is. They have decided
that there is no such thing as real nourishment. They are not ready to accept
what the universe is providing them.

They are therefore sealed off from taking in any proffered support or any
new ideas. Everything fails to “pass the taste test” as far as they are
concerned -- they want to stay in their comfort zone. They have become
contemptuously closed-minded, set in their opinions, secretive, selfish, and
unwilling to change.

712
It is the outcome of a highly negative experience with their untrustworthy,
denial-dominated, dysfunctional family and their subsequent standins.

RIGHT MOUTH PROBLEMS

“Sneering Sam.” They have a cynical attitude with regard to how the world
works and how people operate.

CENTER MOUTH PROBLEMS

“Deep distrust.” They don’t believe that there can be any true relevance or
nourishment out there, especially from other people.

LEFT MOUTH PROBLEMS

“Abuse-rage.” They have a deep resentment over how they have been
treated by other people.

ROOF OF MOUTH PROBLEMS

“Control tower issues.” They are experiencing conflicts and concerns

regarding who or what are in control of things and/or where things are
going. It arises from a history of being dominated and oppressed or of being
cleverly conned, manipulated or out-maneuvered in childhood.

There is a resulting deep distrust of the Universe and of anything or anyone

having any control of their lives. The current internal or external situation is
threatening their hegemony or their effectiveness.

RIGHT ROOF OF MOUTH

“What’s going on here?” There are concerns regarding what is determining

how they run their lives.

CENTER ROOF OF MOUTH

“Who’s in charge Up There?!” They are experiencing intense distrust of the

Universe.

713
LEFT ROOF OF MOUTH

“Self-distrust.” They have issues around their own motivations and

priorities that were generated from being effectively detrimentally
programmed so as to “shoot themselves in the foot.”

FRONT ROOF OF MOUTH

“What if...?” They have conflicts about impending or immediate decisions

that they have to make.

MIDDLE ROOF OF MOUTH

“What’s important?” There is agitation about their criteria and processes for
decision-making concerning important matters.

REAR ROOF OF MOUTH

“What’s going to happen?” They have anxieties in relation to the

implications and ramifications of processes already set in motion that
affects their future.

DRYNESS OF MOUTH (Where the tongue sticks to the roof and it feels
sticky-due to lack of saliva)

“High and dry.” They are having a bad case of fear and anticipation-anxiety.
They sense that something dangerous or punitive is imminent, and they feel
like a fish out of water, in that they fear they don’t have what it takes to
handle it.

This feeling came from having had to deal with a family in which there was
much subterranean, subconscious and subtle subterfuge and sabotage going
down that no one saw or knew was happening.

It left them feeling that nothing is as it seems, and that at any moment
something awful could happen, and they can’t do anything to head it off at
the pass. They just have to handle it like an ever-vigilant “hockey goalie.”

STOMATITIS (Inflammation of the mouth)

714
“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are intensely angry at
the way their situation is going, and at the way their life is developing. They
feel that it is highly distasteful, and they are “fed up to the gills.” They are
the product of a severely dysfunctional family who was forever getting
themselves into pickles, in a “dead end” pattern.

MRSA (Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus – a severe viral

infection)

“Resentful resignation.” They are having the experience that life is being
quite difficult, and they are feeling very little, if any positives in their life.
To them, it feels like everything is one long series of responsibilities,
traumas and drudgeries. It is the result of a “grimly getting through the
night” dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Well, what do you expect?” They are bitterly of the opinion that “There is
no joy in Bloodville!” They are in effect utterly unable to experience the
beauty, good and joy of the Universe. They are quite resistive to and angry
about the process of dealing with life. They have the feeling that they get
every disease and disorder that comes down the pike.

They are the product of a severely ambivalent and self-defeatingly

dysfunctional family system. It had the effect of convincing them that love
is a four letter word and that joy is a joke. Their experience is that they can
and should have no love for themselves, since they are “just getting what
they deserve.”

MULTIPLE CHEMICAL SENSITIVITY (Fatigue, allergies, asthma, etc.,

due to chemical, radiation and extra low frequency exposure)

“Alone on my own.” They have an overwhelming fear of God, coupled

with a profound separation-paranoia. They have the experience that they are
struggling along in a cold, hostile and attacking world. They have no sense
of connection to the Cosmos, and they feel that they are all they have. There
was intrauterine, prenatal, and post-partum ambivalence, and they feel that

715
when they are under stress or vulnerable, the world is decidedly not a safe
place to be.

***************************************

“Endangered.” They are over-reacting to felt threats to their well-being, to

something that is regarded as being hostile to their welfare. There is a deep
level of fear about having to participate fully in life or about potential
annihilation. There is also an intense distrust of letting something inside
their boundaries. They are the product of an untrustworthy and invasive
dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Immobilized.” They are dominated by anxiety, suppressed emotions and

unresolved aggravation or irritants from childhood. They are engaged in on-
the-edge functioning, due to severe emotional difficulties, and due to
denying of their own power and self-worth.

They feel stifled and yet at the same time feel that it is unsafe to take charge
of their own life. They are full of ideas to get ahead, but they are afraid of
pushing on against opposition, should they fail. They are intensely inhibited
against free expression, and they are full of unresolved guilt and suppressed
grief. Their family was highly enmeshed, dysfunctional and suppressive.

***************************************

“Authority-freak.” They are very dependent and afraid to break away, yet
they want to control and dominate. They often are possessed by their
family, by institutions and by spouse figures.

They are a potential leader and independent thinker who is chafing at the bit
under what feels like oppressive authority-domination. They feel held back
by fools, unrecognized for their true value and talents, and not given the
high place they deserve, so they force themselves to perform to prove
themselves to the “boss.”

716
It all got started in a self-immersed and possessive family who wanted to
“keep them around the old homestead” by undermining their coping
capability.

***************************************

“Rejecting first.” They have a lot of disappointment, bitterness,

unforgivingness and over-worked resentment. They are out of step and in
disharmony with their environment. They feel threatened and they fear loss,
so they are trying to seize control of the situation.

There is an inability to resolve their resentment, with a resulting rejecting of

the breath of life and an emotional suffocation. They have a strong
ambivalence towards their mother and against mother-stand-ins.

They are being plagued by unmet dependency needs induced by a

“smother-loving” yet rejecting mother who systematically undermined their
capacity for independence, identity and destiny-manifestation. There is also
a deep fear of letting go of childhood and an intense inner crying.

***************************************

“Jealous possessiveness.” They are intensely sensitive, fearful and longing

for mother love or for love from someone close, and they have a rather
pronounced clingingness and abandonment-anxiety.

As a result, they are fatalistic, hostility-repressing, compulsive,

hypersensitive and lonely, with a very low self-esteem. They have a
dampened zest for life, due to their stifling, engulfing and yet abandonment-
threatening mothering.

***************************************

“Wind has gone out of their sails.” They have lost their sense of purposes
and direction, along with their desire for life. They have developed a deep
fear of life, of taking responsibility, of coping with any further demands.
The illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat from confrontation and
action.

717
They are the product of a destiny-undermining possessive mother who
generated a sense of overwhelm and futility in them.

MULTIPLE MYELOMA (Cancer of the plasma cells in bone marrow)

“What’s the use?” There is a deep secret or heavy grief eating away at the
self. They are harboring deep hurt and long-standing resentment, and they
are carrying deep-seated hatreds of the world around them and of the people
in it.

They feel that they are in a rotten situation and that they always have been.
They hate it and see no way out of it. They have had to bear great troubles
and sorrows, which they have had to silently suffer and stuff. They also feel
their hopes and plans were always systematically thwarted by other people
and/or by circumstances. They are suffering from loss and hopelessness,
morbid fears, abandonment-depression and deprivation-resentment.

There is much unresolved hate, revenge desires, jealousy, envy and anger
that is either suppressed or expressed indirectly in passive-aggressive and
subconscious subterranean subtle sabotage. They are the product of
severely critical parenting, and of systematic victimization in childhood.

MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS (Loss of nerve endings, resulting in weakness

and incoordination, often leading to immobilization ultimately)

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are being forced to look at things

they’ve never looked at before, including past life stuff. They have to live
life for the moment, and to be crystal clear about what they can have and
what they can’t have.

They have a will of iron, and they are intensely inflexible, all of which
arises out of a generalized dread. They have taken on their situation with
self-willed determination, in a “true grit” response to the situation, leading
to “pit bull” stubbornness and to a “going down fighting” approach. They
have taken on a real mental hard-nosed and hard-headed approach.

They have typically been highly oppressive and coercively demanding in

their pattern in past lives. It is also the result of growing up in a rigidly

718
patriarchal household from this life.

***************************************

“Exploitation-rage.” They feel like they have been forced to undertake hard
physical work or its equivalent in energy output against their will. They feel
there is no support or assistance, and that they have to sustain everyone all
by themselves. They hate it, and they desperately want help and support.

They feel that they have exhausted themselves, and they really resent it.
They feel alone and alienated, and they are full of despair-rage. They are in
effect wreaking revenge upon those who never loved them. Their family
were exploitative and demanding, with little or no concern for their needs or
welfare.

***************************************

“Gotta take care of it myself!” They are into severe martyr-tripping, guilt-
inducing, and massive control-tripping. They have a real “thing” about
reforming and reforming things.

They are very rigid and moralistic, with a steel-reinforced value system and
a fixed way of looking at the world and of doing things. They are fearful
that if they don’t take a personal hand in things, it will all go to hell in a
bread basket.

They have a great deal of bottom line despair in response to their original
severely dysfunctional and judgmental family, in which they played the
“hero(ine)-rescuer.” They were the “family hoist,” and inflexible disaster-
deflection became their specialty.

***************************************

“Self-straight-jacketing.” They are fearful of being free, and they are

terrified of their true feelings. They are repressing their emotions, and they
are therefore trapping themselves into immobilization and muscular
atrophy. They are as a result unable to cope or to flow with change or to
work in a co-creative and cooperative relationship with the world. They

719
have then subsequently “selective electromagnetically” attracted and been
attracted to overwhelming situations and relationships just like the original
family’s scene.

They therefore have a strong co-dependent “rescue trip” pattern which is

now leading to a final dénouement with regard to learning the lessons
involved. They are the product of an oppressive-suppressive-repressive
family who would not allow them to be themselves.

MUMPS (Inflammation of the large salivary glands)

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are afraid to be themselves for fear of destroying

the people and systems around them if they do so. They are immobilized
and uncertain as to what to do. In children, this represents a fear that they
will wipe out their family if they start being themselves. In an adult, it is a
re-run of the same situation they faced as a child in a dysfunctional family.

MUSCLE CRAMPS

“Flashbacks.” They are tightening their thoughts through fear, as they tense
up and maintain a hyper-vigilant “Nam-vet” type of reactivity. They feel
very unsafe in the world, and they are unable to relax and let go. It is the
result of a “Nam-like” family environment.

***************************************

“Change panic-grabs.” They are prone to fearful gripping and holding on in

an agitated tension manner. They are “holding on for dear life” to some idea
or feeling or situation, out of a belief that to let go is to bring on disaster.
They are being rather willful and stubborn, and they are refusing to move
forward.

It stems from a family experience in which the new and unknown was often
a negative experience. It also represents having to confront issues they have
been putting off for some time (perhaps lifetimes). (See the specific muscles
for further particulars)

DEEP, DULL INTENSE ACHE, CRAMPS

720
“Weltschmarz” (“world pain”). They have a highly sensitized experience of
the world’s ills and evils. It is an intensely pained perceptivity and
orientation. They have a lot of “heart-smarts.” There has been deprivation, a
deep need, or a desire for something that is not being fulfilled. There is an
aching imperative for change and fulfillment.

They have an intense longing for love and a desperate need for being held,
arising from a feeling of undeservingness. They have effectively “thrown in
the towel” on their ever getting it.

They are essentially resigned to a “stoic trip” in which they tend to

capitulate to the “fact” things are never going to get any better and that they
just have to “bite the bullet.”

As a result, they tend to “numb out” and to grudgingly forebear things. The
combination of the sense of powerlessness, the breadth and depth of their
awareness, and the saturation with negativity of their childhood lead to a
“tilt” in a tragedian direction.

It comes from having been driven to the sidelines at an early age in an

intractably dysfunctional and rejecting family and from their observing
everything like a “Martian anthropologist.”

MUSCLE PROBLEMS

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are resistant to new experiences,

and they refuse to move on in life. Unsettling memories are surfacing, and
they must confront issues that have been long put off.

They are having great difficulty coordinating the execution of things,

integrating ideas of what is wanted to be accomplished with the pragmatic
results they are getting, and dealing with the feelings and issues associated
with success. They have little sense of competence and confidence.

They are having significant problems in mobility, flexibility and activity.

Either they have to be extremely inhibited and careful in all they do, or they
are immobilized and unable to take action. It arises from an intensely self-
distrust-inducing “keep them around the old homestead” family, who

721
programmed them to be simultaneously super-successful (for the family
only) and to otherwise fail. They have “come up a cropper” in reaction to
the re-emergence or continued confrontation with this dilemma, and it has
effectively immobilized them. (See the particular muscles affected for more
information)

FIBROCITIS (Inflamed muscles, spasms, exhaustion)

“Stress-overload.” They have to take care of everything, because no one

else will or because they’ll do it all wrong. They are completely caught up
in taking care of business and running the show. They feel that everything
rides on them, that “the buck stops here.” Now they can’t do it all by
themselves anymore. Their single-handed “Atlas trip” is too much to
handle.

It all got started in a “never good enough” parenting situation in which they
were put on a very conditional love basis of having to “perform for their
breakfast,” because the family conveyed that they were failing in their role
of the “family hoist,” with the result that they developed an underlying self-
disgust and failure-feeling.

FIBROMYALGIA

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread-
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.
They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-
exhaustion. They are the product of perfectionistic parenting.

***************************************

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are resistant to new experiences,

and they are refusing to move on in life. Unsettling memories are surfacing,
and they must confront issues that have been long put off.

There is either guilt-based self-punishment and atonement-seeking or a

belief in bondage, victimization and victim-tripping. In any case, they have
a deep feeling of separation and sinfulness, arising from massive guilt-

722
induction their family for who they were, what they needed, what they did,
and what went down in the family.

***************************************

“Self-distrust.” They have great difficulty coordinating the execution of

things, integrating ideas of what is wanted to be accomplished with the
pragmatic results they are getting, and dealing with the feelings and issues
associated with success.

They have little sense of competence and confidence, and they are having
significant problems in mobility, flexibility and activity. They have to be
extremely inhibited and careful in all they do, or they become immobilized
and unable to take action.

It arises from an intensely self-distrust-inducing “keep them around the old

homestead” family, who programmed them to be super-successful (for the
family only), and to otherwise fail. They have “come up a cropper” in
reaction to the re-emergence or continued confrontation with this dilemma,
and it has effectively immobilized them.

FIBROMYOSITIS (Chronic muscle inflammation, skin hypersensitivity,

numbness and fatigue)

“Don’t move!” They were given a severe immobilization injunction as a

child, and as a result they are a “sealed unit” and an “urban hermit.” They
feel like a “moral cretin” who should not have social support and love in
their life, and that “love is a poison apple.” They were made afraid to take
action and simultaneously held accountable/responsible for all that went
wrong in the family.

FIBROSITIS (Stiffness and pain in the deep muscles)

“Lack of flow.” There is a considerable inner conflict about how they are
functioning in the world and about how they are expressing themselves.
The result is a rigidity that leads to anguish about their situation. They are
deeply concerned and confused as to what to do and what direction to take.

723
They had to adapt to a dysfunctional family culture, and now it doesn’t
work for them anymore.

INFLAMMATION OF THE MUSCLES

“Stress-overload.” They feel that they have to take care of everything

because no one else will or they’ll do it all wrong. They are completely
caught up in “taking care of business” and running the show, and they feel
that everything rides on them, that “the buck stops here.” Now they find
they can’t do it all by themselves anymore, that their single-handed “Atlas
trip” is proving to be too much to handle.

It all got started in a “never good enough” parenting situation in which they
were put on a very conditional love basis of having to perform for their
breakfast, because the family conveyed that they were failing in their role of
the “family hoist,” with the result that they developed an underlying self-
disgust and failure-feeling because they couldn’t “make it all better.”

MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY (Progressive wasting away of the muscles)

“Peter Pan(ella).” They are experiencing a deterioration of their emotional

strength, and they are in a crisis of discouragement, self-doubt and
competence-anxiety. They are overwhelmed by life, and they feel unable to
carry it on any further. They feel insufficient to the cause and that “It’s not
worth growing up.”

It is in response to a “keep them around the old homestead” programming

by the parents, in which the injunction was to never become more
developed than their parents were. They have now reached a crossroads in
what is an issue that they have put off for lifetimes, which is learning to be
willing to be the best they can be.

***************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are experiencing subconscious fear that they

will “lose it” and hit or hurt someone. They have a great deal of resentment-
rage for their success-avoidant life history and situation.

724
They come from a ragefully passive-aggressive family who programmed
them to be self-defeating and self-harming. They therefore now feel at some
level that they have to suffer to atone for their “evilness,” a fact which they
find infuriating.

MUSHROOM POISONING

“The old Lucy and the football trick (pull the football away when you go to
kick it).” They have a propensity to “fall for appearances,” and to try once
again to get the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” from “God(zilla).”
They were systematically denied any sense of personal worth, while being
continuously promised that if they just get up to snuff, things would all
change.

It was a “poison apple” experience, but with such high stakes (acceptability,
viability and removal of rejection by the “Home Office” [All that Is]) that
they keep “trying for the brass ring” in the face of repeated betrayals and
let-downs. It’s a form of foolish risk-taking.

MYALGIC ENCEPHALOMYELITIS; “M.E.”

(Exhaustion and irritability that can lead to gland problems, meningitis and
immune system breakdown)

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread-
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.

They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-

exhaustion. They have lost their sense of purposes and direction, of the
desire for life, and the wind has gone out of their sails. They have
developed a deep fear of life, of taking responsibility, and of coping with
any further demands. The illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat
from confrontation and action. They are the product of perfectionistic
parenting.

***************************************

725
“Crushed talent.” It is an instance of unfulfilled giftedness-suppression,
resulting in severe despair-rage, along with emotional commotional
episodes of almost psychotic-seeming proportions, and utter exhaustion
comparable to Epstein-Barr or Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. They also find
themselves being “used” by their gifts, in the form of uncontrollable
outbursts and breakouts of their talents in a non-functional and often highly
detrimental manner.

They also go into experiences and expressions of intense mental and

emotional distress and distortion that are extremely alarming and alienating.
They feel possessed by these explosions, and they become quite “run amok-
anxious” about it. In addition, they often are possessed by their family, by
institutions and/or by spouse figures.

They are the product of extremely possessive and oppressive parenting that
got started intrauterine. They were forbidden and prevented from doing
their own thing or from developing their own capabilities, identity and
destiny. They were instead forced into playing out their parent(s) (usually
the father’s) unexpressed destiny.

***************************************

“Allergic to themselves and the world.” There is a programmed self-

rejection that has resulted in a “belly up” of the immune system, which is in
effect working against them.

They were placed in the “family hoist” position of over-responsibility, and

they were targeted with the attributed accountability for everything that
went wrong in the family -- as if it was a motivated let down betrayal or a
personal failure on their part.

This came about as a function of their being a gifted child living in a

dysfunctional family who expected them to be able to handle all the
family’s problems. They played the “hero(ine)” role in the family, and they
turned into a work-aholic/achieve-aholic contribution-freak.

They became very accomplished and independent, with perfectionistic

standards around worth-earning arising from unpleasable parenting -- they

726
could never, ever measure up. They ended up validation-starved as a result.

***************************************

“Cinderella/Cinderfella.” They have a huge control trip that doesn’t work

that arises because they have no sense of their personal worth or value.
They operated in a chronic flight-fight system arousal in childhood, in a
context of continual rejection, blame-throwing, and impossible demands.
There is a severe “family betrayal” delusion and a guilt-grabbing
propensity, due to their being told in effect that they caused World War II.
They actually tried to “go for the gold ring” of healing their family because
of their gifts.

In the meantime, the family was severely exploitative and betraying, as they
overwhelmingly expected of and over-utilized them. No one taught them
self-care or self-soothing in their first year of life. They were expected to
care for the parents instead. They therefore have no sense of entitlement.

There was little nurturance, compassion or protection in infancy, which

resulted in very heavy self-numbing and frantic-fanatic efforting to “make
up for what they have caused.” They were, in effect, abandoned at an early
age by expectations of perfection and miracles. They are now collapsing,
out of a sense of non-deservingness and from having run out of inner
resources to pull off the “rabbit in the hat” trick anymore.

***************************************

“Hapless/helpless/hopeless victimization.” There is an inability to self-

nurture, to self-appreciate and to self-soothe. As a result of this, they can
sometimes end up being care-coercing of the environment, in a very belated
attempt to get the fundamental nurturing they never received.

The family was highly authoritarian, non-supportive and repressive-

suppressive from the beginning. Often there was also physical and sexual
abuse, along with the intense emotional abuse and deprivation. They were
subjected to highly conditional, demanding and self-immersed parenting,
and “There was no joy in Bloodville.” The whole pattern could be
summarized in the phrase, “It’s not allowed!”

727
MYASTHENIA GRAVIS (Uncontrollably drooping eyelids)

“Resignation-apathy.” They have the experience that anything they would

do to change things in their life and in the world would only lead to no
effect or to worse conditions. They are engaged in systematic self-
defeatingness that reflects an underlying sense of worthlessness and
undeservingness of love. It’s a “Here’s another fine mess I’ve gotten myself
into!” severe grief and self-distrust pattern going down.

They therefore are fearful and avoidant of change, evolution and

transformation. They also have a pronounced propensity to seek to hide
their underlying depression with a projection of cheerfulness.

They have a strong tendency to want to just give up and forget the whole
thing. They are the product of rejecting and wrong-making parenting in an
implacably dysfunctional family in which they were indeed unable to make
a difference.

RIGHT EYELID DROOPING

“World-weary.” They are convinced that there is nothing that can be done to
improve things in their environment. They have a pronounced tendency to
get into trouble with the workings of the world as a result.

LEFT EYELID DROOPING

“Bite the bullet.” They have become in effect resigned to things being and
going pretty much the way that they have so far for them. They have intense
problems with self-manifestation processes, inasmuch as it has always been
their experience that they are not able to make a difference on their own
behalf.

MYOMA (Benign uterine fibroid tumors in menopause)

“Not yet, not yet!” They are afraid of the loss of fertility, as if it were the
end of their sexual attractiveness, purpose and life. They fear neglect and
rejection, and they are prone to emulate pregnancy as a result. It is an

728
abandonment-anxiety reaction arising from highly conditional loving as a
child.

Section 13

729
M

730
360

731
M

732
361

362

363

364

365

366

367

368

369

733
370

371

372

373

374

375

376

377

734
378

735
NARCOLEPSY (Uncontrollable urge to go to sleep)

“I want out!” They can’t cope, due to extreme fear. They feel cast adrift and
abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that Is). They are so freaked out that
they want to get away from it all. They don’t want to be here at all -- they
want to be anywhere else but here.

They encountered an out-of-control dysfunctional family to which they had

to adapt, and with whom they had to somehow survive. It has been that way
ever since, due to the imprinting effect that leads us to attract to ourselves
and be attracted to that with which we grew up.

They are now reaching the point of total demoralization, and they can’t take
it anymore, they can’t cope any longer. They are sick and tired of all their
responsibilities, and they desperately want them to go away. They need to
free themselves from their enslavement to people, systems and situations
that resemble or remind them of their family.

NAUSEA

“What a revolting development THIS is!” They are having a fear and
disgust reaction to what is happening to them. They are totally rejecting an
idea or experience -- they don’t want to have anything to do with it. They
want to throw it right back out again.

They feel that something wrong or immoral is happening. They are

inundated with disgust with the situation and themselves, and they are full
of fear of the consequences of what’s going down. They feel that something
dreadful has happened, and they feel responsible for it. They wish it hadn’t
happened, and they are truly sorry it has occurred. They deeply wish they
hadn’t “done it.” They want things to return to the way they were before
this happened.

They are full of upset, pain and sadness, they don’t want the situation
anywhere near them. They desperately want to undo the past, and they are
afraid of the effects of this on their future. They are full of dissatisfaction,
disgust and regret over the way things are. They are saying to themselves

736
over and over, “I should have...” They feel personally accountable for
everything that happens, particularly the negative outcomes.

Their family held them accountable and responsible for all that took place,
and all eyes turned in their direction when anything went wrong -- which
was frequently. They were made very aware they had no right to commit to
anyone or anything else but the continued maintenance of the family. They
therefore have great guilt about sexuality, success, and intimacy, as if these
were “evil deeds.”

“MORNING SICKNESS” (In pregnancy)

“Implication-anxiety.” They are having second thoughts about the

magnitude of the undertaking they are involved with. It activates a sense of
queasiness and overwhelm. It is reactivating their childhood experience of
having had to in effect parent their family and/or their never having had real
nurturing. (See VOMITING)

NAVEL PROBLEMS

“Power issues.” They feel prevented from accessing their personal potency
and/or they are afraid to access their community clout and initiative impact-
making capabilities. It is the result of being reacted to as threatening and/or
“evil” when they did so as a child.

***************************************

“Cut off from the Universe.” They feel somehow rejected by God. They
assume they are getting their Cosmic “just desserts,” and this conclusion
has carried into their life as the foundational assumption out of which they
operate. It started in an ambivalent, if not a hostile womb experience.

It was a destiny design feature for purposes of karma-burning, experience-

expanding and/or special training.

“NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE” (“N.D.E.”)

737
“Time for a change.” They have reached a point where they can no longer
keep up their pattern of life any more. It is such an overwhelmingly
important matter that they literally had to leave body to make a new choice
and/or new commitment regarding their destiny. The more profound and
dramatic/traumatic the experience and the more extensive the aftermath, the
bigger the need for change and/or the more significant the destiny decision.

They are also notably “sensitive” to all manner of experiences and inputs,
including intuitive, psychic and “other-worldly,” though this may not have
been noticed by them prior to the experience. This type of situation usually
arises in persons who have had a severely traumatic and physically or
sexually abusive childhood.

***************************************

“Spiritually guiding.” They are now an intelligent and life-understanding,

wisdom-manifestor. They are now here to assist us in integrating the
spiritual with the practical. They were effectively being driven to get in
touch with the Cosmic by their dysfunctional family as a child, and they
either went to the sidelines to track the flow of human events, or they
recoiled into an intensely materialistic orientation. Either way, their destiny
now is to share the “good news” about the true nature of the Universe.

NECK PROBLEMS

“No escape.” They are being confronted with issues they haven’t been able
to handle for many lifetimes. They must now finally be handled, and they
have to deal with the pressure of this. It got started in their family, who
generated circumstances and programming that has resulted in their having
to confront the issue now -- or pay dire consequences.

***************************************

“I don’ wanna know!” They don’t even want to be here, and they are living
in quiet desperation. Unfortunately, they are reacting by being stubbornly,
rigidly inflexible and refusing to see other sides of a question. They can’t
see what’s not in front of their nose or what’s behind things or what’s in the

738
background. They are the product of a denial-dominated dysfunctional
family who constantly tried to shove everything under the rug.

***************************************

“Total control trip.” They have clamped down on the system around them,
and they are adamantly controlling everything. They have lost almost all
poise, fluidity and contact with their feelings. They no longer can integrate
and translate feelings and impulses into concepts, thoughts, words, or into
strategies and tactics. They can’t refine and amplify or dispense and
disperse effectively -- they are trying to analyze things into position.

They need and want to release and express their experiences, feelings and
interpretations, but they are totally terrified of doing so. They are under a lot
of stress as a result, and they are non-accepting and judgmental about it all
and of other people. It’s all a gigantic pain in the neck for them. It all got
started in a highly mentalistic, perfectionistic and control-tripping family.

***************************************

“Hell-bent-for-leather.” They fear death, disaster, dishonor, disgrace,

misery, illness, misfortune and failure if they “let loose and let fly with
one.” Their reaction is to go on a head-lowered pursuit of achievement in
ways they regard as representing strength of character.

They are intensely method-oriented, form-fixated and locked into their

perspective. They are very set in their ways, and they operate out of a
morally-convinced reactionary intolerance. They honestly believe it is a
matter of pivotal moral magnitude that things be done in the right (their)
way.

They are now being confronted with a situation or someone whose ideas are
at odds with their set ways of doing things. This whole pattern got set up in
a highly rigid and patriarchally perfectionistic household.

RIGHT NECK

739
“Emotional expression problems.” They are having hassles around handling
emotional manifestation.

LEFT NECK

“Feeling-suppressing.” They are engaged in avoidance of tuning in to

emotional needs and issues.

UPPER NECK

“Emotional experience problems.” There are issues around handling their

emotional experiences.

MIDDLE NECK

“Emotional expression conflicts.” They have conflicts about emotional

expression.

LOWER NECK

“Emotional channeling issues.” They have concerns around the control and
channeling into required action and events of their emotional responses.

FRONT NECK

“Emotional self-rejection.” They have guilt and shame around their

emotional issues and needs.

BACK NECK

“Caught with their emotional pants down.” There is a fear of being in the
incorrect psychological position.

BROKEN NECK

“Loss of control.” They have been rather intensely orchestrating and

determining their experiences, life and environment, and now they suddenly
find themselves “out of the driver’s seat.”

740
They were, in effect, preventing the flow of life and learning, and they now
have to acquire the ability to being in more sync with things. They grew up
in a household in which having the determination of events and processes
was critical in their dysfunctional family. (See SPINE PROBLEMS for
more information about the particular vertebrae)

NECK PAIN

“Anticipated aggravation.” They are experiencing irritation, displeasure and

pique about a real or fantasized transaction which is expected to result in
some form of attack on their situation, system or self. It is a reactivation of
an old, familiar feeling arising from their dysfunctional and often attacking
family.

“STIFF” NECK

“Bull-headed.” They are rigidly holding to an intense narrowing of

viewpoint, with an inability to see other ways of thinking or to acknowledge
or to yield to others’ ideas. They are displaying a bad case of unbending
rigidity. They are totally closed to other viewpoints as a matter of disaster-
deflection, in their experience of it. They are very set in their ways, and they
are convinced that any deviations will bring nothing but calamity. They
come from a very rigid and conservative family.

“TWISTED” NECK; “WRY NECK” (Due to injury or infection)

“Refusal to face things.” They are being confronted with issues which they
haven’t been able to handle for many lifetimes. They must now finally be
handled. Unfortunately, however, they are reacting by being stubbornly and
rigidly inflexible, and by refusing to see other sides of a question. They
can’t see what’s not in front of their nose or what’s behind things or back
there in the background. They have clamped down on the system, and they
are adamantly controlling everything.

They have lost almost all poise, fluidity and contact with their feelings.
They no longer can integrate and translate feeling and impulses into
thoughts, words, concepts, strategies and tactics. They can’t refine and

741
amplify or dispense and disperse effectively, and they are under a lot of
stress as a result. It’s all a gigantic pain in the neck for them.

They fear death, disaster, dishonor, disgrace, misery, illness, misfortune and
failure if they “let loose and let fly with one,” and they are head-lowered on
a hell-bent-for-leather pursuit of achievement in ways that they regard as
representing strength of character.

They are intensely method-oriented, form-fixation and locked into their

perspective. They are very set in their ways, and they operate out of a
morally-convinced reactionary intolerance. They are now being confronted
with a situation or with someone whose ideas are at odds with their set
ways of doing things.

This whole pattern got set up in a highly rigid and patriarchally

perfectionistic household. They honestly believe that it is a matter of pivotal
moral magnitude that things be done in the RIGHT (Their) way. They are
being told that they need to seek help in alleviating this pattern.

***************************************

“Twisted sister/brother.” They are being caught up in distorted

interpretations and intentions, as a function of their fear of what would
happen if they faced and acted. They are desperately seeking for some way
to re-frame the truth in such a way as to avoid what they deeply fear will be
disastrous consequences if they “straighten up and fly right.” They come
from a denial-dominated and convolutedly collusive dysfunctional family.

“WHIPLASH”

“Catastrophic expectations.” They are quite concerned about what would

happen if they dealt with a big issue that is coming up for them. They are
refusing to go with the flow and to face the issue, leading to non-relevance
of functioning in the area in question. They are trying to deny and/or
control it away.

The truth is, it is an issue that must be handled at this time, as it is

effectively preventing the manifestation of their destiny -- and the Universe

742
is not going to allow that to continue. The issue involves early traumatic
treatment they are loathe to confront, for fear of the consequences.

They were effectively functioning as the “family hoist” pivotal person, and
their impact was huge when they spoke up on anything. In addition, they
were subjected to severe trauma by a totally trusted significant other,
followed by the overtly or subconsciously given very clear message that
they, the perpetrator, and the whole family would be utterly annihilated if
they “blew the cover” on the situation.

NECROSIS (Death of part of the body, due to lack of blood supply)

“Moral cretin.” They are full of mental morbidity and poisonous thoughts,
often arising from guilt or shame over illicit intentions or actions. It comes
from growing up in a “there’s no joy in Bloodville” type of disintegritous
and dysfunctional family who both generated gross situations and then
blame-threw and guilt/shame-induced intensely. It was a continuously
poisonous environment. (See the body part(s) affected for more
information)

NECROTIZING FASCIITIS (See “FLESH-EATING VIRUS”)

NEMATODES (Parasites affecting the nervous system causing

constipation, moodiness, etc.)

“Catastrophic expectations.” The present situation is activating old

abandonment-anxiety and other calamitous anticipations. It is an
implication-overwhelm and a severe loss-paranoia reaction. It reflects very
early intense insecurity reactions due to uncertainty about maternal
commitment and availability.

NERVE PROBLEMS

“Disrupt-power.” They are experiencing a disruption of the flow of

communication, in the form of input-deflecting and/or expression-
suppressing. They are avoiding, preventing and distorting influence,
education and evolution. As a result, the flow of information-transmission,
action-initiation and behavior-facilitation has been derailed.

743
They are grimly holding out and holding on to past strategies, resources,
people and interpretations. They are freaked out and distrusting of the
Universe, and they have to have “red alert” hands on control of everything.
But the result is a thorough bollixing of their situations.

They feel that they are back in their dysfunctional family, and they are the
only ones with any sanity in the situation. The result is an escalating
situation that emulates the family, as a function of their own interventions.

NERVE PAINS (Sharp, stabbing pains accompanying movements)

“Oh no you don’t!” They are getting “saber-rattle warnings” about “not
stepping over that line” of self-commitment and self-manifestation. It is the
result of an intense “keep ‘em around the old homestead” programming.
(See the part(s) of the body affected for more information)

NEURALGIA (Nerve aches)

“Cut off.” They have no self-forgiveness and no self-trust, with the result
that they feel they deserve punishment out of continuously guilty feelings.
They are in anguish over their communication difficulties with other people,
and about their situation. There is very poor communication within them, a
blockage or distortion that is causing them great pain. They received very
little love as a child, and what there was, was very conditional and
interspersed heavily with guilt-induction and shaming.

NEURITIS (Inflammation of the nerves)

“Agitated irritation.” They feel that they are continuously subjected to

tension-inducing and frustrating stimulation. They feel powerless and
undermined because of this. They come from an infuriatingly dysfunctional
family who constantly generated situations, events and processes that were
highly disruptive and derailing.

“NERVOUS BREAKDOWN;” “NERVOUS PROSTRATION”

“Blown away.” They are manifesting an inability to carry on, to cope, and
to function. There has been a severe traumatic emotional shock has left

744
them feeling powerless. They are now upset about being upset, and they are
feeling continuously attacked. They do not like what they know, and they
do not want to act on certain known information.

It is an old, familiar feeling, in that it reproduces the experience they had in

their implacably dysfunctional, denial-dominated and traumatic family.

***************************************

“Reality-avoidance.” They are misusing their mental gifts with negative

thinking habits again, as they did in the prior lives that have laid the
foundation for this resolution situation. Their mind is laboring under a
delusion, and it is losing its self-reflective consciousness. They are intensely
fearful of the future, and they are unable to work with their real feelings and
their true comprehensions of things. Their family was severely distorted and
nihilistically negative in its thinking.

***************************************

“Severely self-centered.” They are intensely focused on what’s in it for

them. They are continuously milking the environment for their gain, with
no concern or regard for their ecological impact. They are the product of a
convenience-concerned dysfunctional family, and they are the next
generation.

***************************************

“Stress-out.” They are intensely self-centered, and they are jamming the
channels of communication and refusing to let input in. They are confused,
anxious, hysterical, fearful, strife-torn, resentfully disappointed,
overworked and withdrawing from life’s activities.

They are overwhelmed with the communication frustrations, and they have
exhausted their “nerve force.” There is a great deal of tension, strain,
struggle, and imposition which has led to total self-immersion.

All of this is all-too-reminiscent of their severely self-defeating and

detrimental family of origin, where they learned these strategies that are

745
now getting them into very hot water. (See the book “Problematic Patterns”
by the author for information on the particular mental illnesses and other
psychological disorders)

“NERVOUSNESS”

“Jumpiness.” They are plagued by apprehensiveness, and they fear the

future. They do not trust the process of life, and they are into intense
agitation and anxiety, with the result that they live in constant confusion.

They are hyper-sensitive to others, and they are lacking in contact with their
own inner being. They are out of touch with their true feelings, and they
have great difficulty communicating them. They are the product of a
confusion-inducing dysfunctional family in which things seemed to just
jump out at them all the time.

***************************************

“Cosmic abandonment.” They live in fear of attack and abuse, and they are
unable to relax and be free of selfish, egocentric and narcissistic attitudes.
They struggle and rush about, feeling there isn’t enough time.

They have no sense of connection with or support from the “Home Office”
(All that Is), and they have no capacity to come from the heart as a result.
They have a large lack of trust and faith, and they see everything
subjectively -- only as it relates to them.

It all arose in a similar family culture, in which everyone was continuously

“looking out for Numero Uno” in what they felt was a totally untrustworthy
world.

NEUROPATHY (Numbness in the extremities, especially the fingers and

toes)

“Shadow-shoving.” They are systematically suppressing all experiences and

expressions of aspects of themselves that they are convinced are so
unacceptable as to require total elimination of manifestation. These aspects
have caused them so much pain and hurt that they don’t want to feel them.

746
The “unacceptable” aspects were reacted to with great punishment,
ostracism and rejection when they manifested these qualities and
capabilities as a child, so they are now dedicated to never contacting them.

***************************************

They are “going dead” mentally and emotionally -- totally retreating into
their core and shutting down feeling, out of fears that they are in a “dog-eat-
dog world” in which people are out to do them in. They are vulnerability-
avoidant, and they are operating with feelings that the environment is truly
dangerous. They have a deep and abiding distrust of intimacy out of an
“intimate enemy” experience in their exploitative and untrustworthy family.

***************************************

“Cut off.” They are withholding love and consideration, and they are love-
deflecting and love-distrusting. To them, love is a poison apple that they
want absolutely nothing to do with. It is a result of wrong-making and self-
immersed parenting. (See the area(s) involved for more information)

“NIGHT BLINDNESS;” “NIGHT MYOPIA”

“Automatic pilot.” They are prone to run their life on the basis of the most
frequently required responses and reactions. It is a kind of “comfort zone
efficiency/laziness” that they get into. They are the product of a narrow-
optioning family who rather strongly insisted on their adhering to the “tried
and true,” the “convenient,” and the “acceptable.”

***************************************

“Overwhelm-anxiety.” They are intimidated by their own emotional

feelings, reactions and intentions, in a kind of “shadow-paranoia.” They are
afraid that if they get in touch with these motivations, they will precipitate
World War III within themselves, around them, and in their lives.

It comes from an extremely strong “Don’t see what we are feeling!”

injunction in their severely dysfunctional family. They first encountered it

747
when they gave an “Emperor’s new clothes” reaction in response to the
feelings activated by what was happening around them early in childhood.

They quickly learned that to get in touch with and express their feelings and
reactions is to set off a “dynamite shed” outcome (where you find yourself
in a pitch black environment full of rough-hewn square boxes, skinny ropes
and a funny smell, so you light a match for enlightenment).

So they have learned to stuff it and sit on their feelings, reactions and
intentions, with the result that they are now afraid of what would happen if
they ever got in touch with them.

NIGHTMARES; NIGHT TERRORS

“They’re out to GET me!” They are suffering from annihilation-anxiety in

reaction to perceived threats to their well-being and/or survival in their
lives. In children, the perceived threat is current. In adults, the current
precipitants are replays of childhood traumas or traumatic relationships. In
both cases, there is symbolic, subtle or not-so-subtle danger or threatening
in their intimate environment.

NILE VIRUS; WEST NILE VIRUS (Fever, dizziness, lightheadedness,

gastro-intestinal problems, muscle ache, headache and confusion for the
80% mild cases. Disorientation, convulsions, vision loss, neurological
damage, coma and perhaps death for the 20% serious cases.)

“Cope-ability concerns.” They are experiencing an impaired ability to cope,

leading to feelings of being overwhelmed, with a loss of their center. They
are have to make high stakes decisions, and they are self-distrusting and
competence-anxious.

They are also hung up in the past, resisting life, refusing to move or change,
and in denial, with result that they are unable to assimilate what is
happening to and around them.

There is a good deal of resentment-rage about all this, and they are staving
off despairing depression as a function of the lack of joy in their life. They
are rather intensely enmeshed in an achievement-seeking, workaholic or

748
survivalist lifestyle and/or orientation. They have the feeling that the buck
stops with them, and one strike and they’re out.

They are finding that their usual ways of coping are not working for them,
and they are faced with having to develop something new. They are the
product of an ambitious or survivalist family who taught them that they are
on their own in an indifferent or even hostile/dangerous world, and that they
have to look out for “Numero Uno,” because no one else will.

SEVERE CASE; DEATH FROM NILE VIRUS

“God is Al Capone!” They are enraged at the Universe for the “dirty end of
the stick” they have gotten since the beginning. They have always felt like a
misfit, that they somehow don’t belong here.

As a result, their needs have not been met, and they in turn have been
unable to fit in, with the result that they have gotten a lot of “You don’t
belong here!” messages from the environment. They feel totally betrayed by
the “Home Office” (All that Is). It all got started in their dysfunctional and
exploitative yet wrong-making family.

“NODULES” (Small lumps, bumps or swellings)

“Yellow-orange alert.” They feel that they are here “on borrowed time,” so
to speak. They therefore have the experience that they have to constantly
“prove themselves,” to demonstrate that they have a right to exist and that
they have significance and importance. They feel that they are always in
danger of being shown to be a hoax, a phony, or an “undesirable.”

This is a situation that greatly frustrates and infuriates them. They were
treated as if there was something wrong with the picture, and that what was
wrong was that they were still in it.

***************************************

“Frustrated ambitions.” They are experiencing considerable resentment and

frustration over non-manifestation in their career. There is considerable hurt
ego over this, and they are manifesting the effects of a severe narcissistic

749
wound. They were functionally emotionally ignored in later infancy, and
they ended up with a major worth concern pattern.

NON-GROWTH OF HAIR

“Stopped in their tracks.” They have undergone a major trauma-shock that

has disrupted their physiology. They are processing the impact, implications
and ramifications of it. It is related to a significant unfinished theme from
their childhood that now needs to be resolved. The trauma is a familiar
experience, only this time it has to be handled.

NON-TICKLISHNESS

“Sealed unit.” They are manifesting joy-avoidance and sexual suppression,

along with vulnerability-preventing self-shutdown and self-containment.
There is an underlying literal terror of intimacy, and they operate in an
“island unto themselves” emotionally insulated fashion. There is also
massive grief-suppression and repressed love-starvation present.

It is the result of a “convenience-parenting” control trip in which they found

out in the crib that if they had any needs, it would result in annihilation. So
they went into “red alert,” and they seized complete control of their system
in such a manner as to prevent their having any needs, as they tried to meet
all their own requirements and to not in any way impose or draw attention
to themselves.

They operate out of a foundational assumption that the Universe will kill
them if they have any needs, if they are vulnerable in any way, or if they
make any requirements of their intimates.

***************************************

“Sexual shutdown.” They were later subjected to seductive-destructive

parenting in which they were seduced and then slapped if they responded in
any affectionate, vulnerable or erotic manner. So they numbed out sexually,
seeing it as being too dangerous and monstrous to ever let loose. The result
is a “Nobody home” pattern in intimacy that generates the very fury they

750
worked so diligently (and unsuccessfully) tried to deflect when they were a
child.

NOSEBLEEDS

“Blown away.” They are suffering from some severe emotional shock on
the unconscious level, something they thought, saw on TV, heard about,
dreamed, experienced, etc. New information has jolted them and altered
their perspective. It has resurfaced an underlying chronic issue for them --
which is their worthlessness feelings. They were in effect largely
emotionally ignored as a child.

***************************************

“Worth-wound inflation.” They have a desperate desire to be noticed,

acknowledged, validated and recognized as being significant. They are in
effect crying for love and feeling utterly overlooked.

They feel left out of things, and they interpret it to mean they are getting
their “rightful treatment.” They have deep-seated self-distrust and self-
denigration, as they doubt their own perceptions, intuitions, even their
sanity, and possibly their very existence.

They are suffering from severe and deep deprivation-grief and rejection-
devastation arising from insufficient early emotional support and
acceptance.

RIGHT NOSTRIL NOSEBLEED

“Ignored.” They are experiencing significant non-recognition and/or

invalidation.

LEFT NOSTRIL NOSEBLEED

“Self-denigration.” They are having a severe reactivation of their

underlying self-distrust and self-denigration.

NOSE PROBLEMS

751
“At effect, not at cause.” They are deeply disappointed, disillusioned,
despairing and/or feeling powerless. Their experiences have resulted in
their not trusting themselves, and they are systematically power-avoidant as
a result.

They were relentlessly disempowered, derailed and demoralized by their

rejecting and dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Walking cerebrum.” With a hyper-rationalistic fear of intuition, they

therefore don’t “sniff out” opportunities or “smell rats.” They therefore fear
external control because they can never tell when someone is going to pull a
fast one on them.

They also don’t trust their own motivations, and they are afraid they might
become meddlesome, immoral, or self-defeatingly success-avoidant. They
are the product of an untrustworthy and denial-dominated enmeshed and
mutually passive-aggressive family.

***************************************

“Fraud feelings.” They are very prone to humiliation and shame, and they
tend to feel any honors they receive are for little achievement. They don’t
recognize themselves or give themselves credit for their inherent
capabilities and integrity. They are notably lacking in self-pride. They are
also sexually ashamed and inhibited.

It is the result of having been subjected to systematic self-distrust-induction

by a hyper-rationalistic, denial-dominated, confidence-undermining, and
sex-ploitative dysfunctional family.

RIGHT NOSE PROBLEM

“What’s going on here?” They have a distrust of the motivations of the

environment, and of their ability to discern or detect them.

LEFT NOSE PROBLEM

752
“Self-immobilization.” They have self-distrust and self-disgust, resulting in
significant self-inhibition.

UPPER NOSE PROBLEM

“I can’t.” They have fundamental motivational issues of non-belief in

themselves.

MIDDLE NOSE PROBLEM

“What will the neighbors think?” They are highly concerned with what
people will make of what they do.

LOWER NOSE PROBLEM

“Hunker down in the bunker!” There is a deep unwillingness to embark on

a program of action in the world.

NUMBNESS

“Shadow-shoving.” They are systematically suppressing all experiences and

expressions of aspects of themselves that they are convinced are so
unacceptable as to require total elimination of manifestation. These aspects
have caused them so much pain and hurt that they don’t want to feel them.

The so-called “unacceptable” aspects were reacted to with great

punishment, ostracism and rejection when they manifested these qualities
and capabilities as a child, so they are now dedicated to never contacting
them.

***************************************

They are “going dead” mentally and emotionally -- totally retreating into
their core and shutting down feeling, out of fears that they are in a “dog-eat-
dog world” in which people are out to do them in. They are vulnerability-
avoidant, and they are operating with feelings that the environment is truly
dangerous. They have a deep and abiding distrust of intimacy out of an
“intimate enemy” experience in their exploitative and untrustworthy family.

753
 ***************************************

“Cut off.” They are withholding love and consideration, and they are love-
deflecting and love-distrusting. To them, love is a poison apple that they
want absolutely nothing to do with. It is a result of wrong-making and self-
immersed parenting. (See the area(s) involved for more information)

NUMB FEET

“Self-avoidance.” They are systematically suppressing all experiences and

aspects of themselves that they’re afraid of, and they are “numbing out” so
as not to feel or know about them. Their so-called “deadly aspects” were
reacted to with great punishment, ostracism and rejection in their family, so
they are now totally dedicated to never contact them.

*************************************

“Out of touch.” They are afraid to be themselves, whoever that is. They
don’t know what their fundamental premises, their innermost dreams, and
their secret hopes and ambitions are.

They feel that they don’t have a vase of operations or a launch pad. Instead,
they have “skeletons in the closet” deep-seated fears and no comprehension
of the past. They are the product of a severely enmeshed, possessive and
dysfunctional family who consistently undermined their sense of identity
and/or destiny.

*************************************

“Closed down.” They are withholding love and considerateness, and they
are love-deflecting and love-distrusting. To them, “love is a poison apple,”
and they absolutely want nothing to do with it. It is the result of severely
wrong-making and self-immersed family.

*************************************

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are displaying a fear of the future,
and yet at the same time, they are afraid not to step forward in life. There is

754
confusion about themselves, other people and life.

They are conservatively avoiding of making disastrous mistakes. They

operate out of a great fear of the unknown and out of catastrophic
expectations. They are prone to take a highly self-restraining approach that
makes them afraid to make a move.

They feel that they can’t carry out their (as yet unknown) inner ambitions
and desires because they dare not put them into action. They come from a
rigidly repressive and suppressive family who conditioned them into
submission and intimidation.

*************************************

“Going dead.” They are shutting down their feelings, due to the experience
that the world is a vicious, malicious and dangerous place. They refuse to
be vulnerable, and they have an abiding distrust of intimacy out of an
“intimate enemy” experience with their exploitative, untrustworthy and
abusive family.

Section 14

755
756
757
N

379

758
N

380

381

759
382

383

384

385

386

387

388

389

760
390

761
OILY SKIN

“Thwarting-resentment.” They are harboring a great deal of anger and

inhibited aggression over their situation. They feel utterly blocked in their
manifestation by the world around them. They have many frustrated desires
and resentments over restrictions, in a feeling of victimization. It arose in a
family in which they did victimize the individual on a routine basis.

“--OSIS” (Chronic symptoms)

“Shadow-dancing.” They are systematically refusing to acknowledge,

integrate and implement the implications of their “shadow” conflicts and
needs. They are doing a “What makes Sammy run?” avoidance dance
around desperately repressed or suppressed qualities or needs which were
massively rejected by their family as they were growing up.

The result is the qualities or needs then become highly distorted and
intensely insistent upon being manifested. Then they “freak and flee,”
resulting in the “settling in for a war of attrition” reaction by the “shadow”
component. This then results in the body’s breaking down in the area(s)
affected or implicated in the on-going “shadow dance.”

OSTEO-MALACIA (Softening of the bones)

“Enough already!” They are disintegrating under the load of responsibilities

they have had to carry all their life. They have the feeling that they just
can’t support themselves and that their world single-handedly like they have
been doing all along.

They are just plain running out of steam from having had to “run on empty”
for so long. It just isn’t in them any more. It reflects the fact that they had to
be the “tower of power” and the “support pillar” for their family as their
way of seeking the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” from their
exploitative, dysfunctional and withholding family.

OSTEO-MYELITIS (Inflammation of the bones)

762
“Alone on their own.” They have a good deal of fear, anger and frustration
with the very structure of the Universe, and with the fundamental nature of
life. They feel totally unsupported, with no sense of safety.

It is a continuation of a feeling they have had all their life, starting in a

depriving infancy and childhood in a dysfunctional family where they had
to be the “Rock of Gibraltar,” the “pillar of strength,” the “family hoist.”

OSTEOPOROSIS (Porousness of the bones)

“Left to their own devices.” They are feeling that there is no support left in
life. They feel totally betrayed by the Universe and the “Home Office” (All
that Is). They are exhausted and depleted, and they are no longer able or
willing to stand up for themselves.

They have a mania for total control of everything around them, and they
can’t stand the unexpected. They feel there is just no love for them from
God. They have a severe “poison apple” reaction to love-inputs, and they
therefore won’t let love in. It all started in a super-exploitative and
dysfunctionally untrustworthy family.

OVARY PROBLEMS

“She-jection.” They have a fear of and rejection of their creativity and

femininity. They are systematically self-denigrating and ashamed of the
feminine role and situation. They would just as soon “take their marbles and
go home.” They are the product of a misogynistic patriarchal household in
which the feminine was denigrated, exploited and abused.

***************************************

“Self-undermining.” They have a great desire and need to be respected that

is being prevented. Their circumstances are of such a nature as to be
exploitative, non-accepting, and denigrating. They come from an enmeshed
and undermining dysfunctional household.

***************************************

763
“Lovelorn.” They are in effect love-starved and intensely lonely. They are
cut off from any social support, appreciation, affection and acceptance.
They were the “odd one out” in their self-immersed and rejecting family.

***************************************

“Erotic conflicts.” They are deeply conflicted about and inadequate-feeling

in the sexual aspect of their being. They feel that they somehow don’t
measure up or on the other hand, that they in no way want to measure up to
the erotic role. They were sex-ploitated, sexualized and/or sexually abused
as a child, or they were sexually denigrated by their family -- father in
particular.

***************************************

“Infernal maternal.” They are in deep conflict about motherhood, including

the way they carry it out, if they are a mother. They feel exploited or
inadequate as a mother, and they deeply resent and/or fear the maternal role
and aspect of themselves. Their mother was miserable in her maternal
functioning, and she passed on her deep issues with motherhood.

***************************************

“Power-avoidant.” They are afraid of their personal potency, for fear of

what would happen if they released it. They may also be having difficulty
giving birth to their identity and destiny. Their early experiences taught
them that personal power is both abused and misused, or that disaster
follows if they manifest their personal potency.

***************************************

“Tripod-rage.” They are afraid of exploitation by the patriarchy, and they

deeply resent being a woman in the paranoid patriarchal world of today. It
got started with a direct infusion from their mother of the irresistible urge to
kick anything with three legs (“tripod-rage”), with behavioral back-up
validation by their father and the paranoid patriarchy.

***************************************

764
“Spousal problems.” There may be significant rejection coming from their
spouse figure, leading to deep pain and self-questioning regarding their
nature as a feminine intimate. It is a repetition of their distorted and
disturbed relationship with her father.

***************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They may be suffering from agitated anxiety about

their patriarchy-paranoia and father-fury. They are alarmed at what their
“tripod-rage” (irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs) might lead
to in the form of their behavior and/or ecological impacts. Their childhood
was saturated with infuriating patriarchal processes.

RIGHT OVARY PROBLEMS

“Femininity-rejection.” They are engaged in rejection of the feminine, out

of “tripod-rage” (irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs), out of
patriarchy-distrusting exploitation-paranoia, or out of fear of rejection by
patriarchal people.

LEFT OVARY PROBLEMS

“Self-rejection.” They are having to deal with self-distrust and/or self-

disgust for themselves as a woman, arising either from an underlying
acceptance of the patriarchy’s rejection of feminine power, or from their
underlying “run amok-anxiety” concerning their intense rage at the
patriarchy.

OVARIAN CANCER

“Tripod-rage.” They are in effect paranoid about exploitation by the

patriarchy. They deeply resent being a woman in the paranoid patriarchal
world of today. It got started with a direct infusion from their mother of the
irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs. Meanwhile, their father
backed it up with his behavioral back-up validation play-outs of the
paranoid patriarchy in action. This runs very deep and silent in their entire
life.

765
OVARIAN CYST (Fluid sac on or near ovary)

“She-jection.” They are experiencing a growing conflict regarding their

femininity and all of the issues described above. It is the result of
systematic rejection on the basis of her gender by her patriarchal family.
(See GENITAL PROBLEMS -- FEMALE; UTERUS PROBLEMS;
VAGINAL PROBLEMS; VULVA PROBLEMS)

“OVER-ACTIVE” ADRENALS

“Mental run amok.” There is an over-production of crushing ideas that

results in mental imbalance and feeling overpowered. They have the
experience of not being able to select or control the contents of their mind.

It comes from having had to remain continuously open to all inputs as a

function of faulty cognitive structure development, arising from a
confusion-inducing and intrusive family. (See ADRENAL PROBLEMS;
GRAVE’S DISEASE)

“OVERDOSE”

“Is there Anybody up There?” They are feeling that they have either been
abandoned by God or that God is a fatal fantasy. In any case, their
experience is there may well not be any point to any of this. So they push
the limits of every situation and setting to see if there is any sense or
sensibility to anything or anyone. They are the product of a severely
demoralizingly dysfunctional family.

“OVERDOSE” DEATH

“Gave up the ghost.” They reached the place where “What’s the use?” was
the bottom line feeling. They came to the point where they lived in a very
simplistic, “black and white” world in which there were only two
possibilities.

They were unable or refused to see another way out or see other potential
solutions to situations. They also felt totally unsafe in the world. As a result,

766
they took an “Is THIS going to do it?” approach with their substance abuse
behavior.

They had become hell-bent on termination, and everything they did pushed
the outer limits of the physical and social laws, hoping one of these days
they would find themselves out of here. They felt there was nothing worth
living for, and that they were worse than nothing.

It was the result of being cut off at every pass, and of being “cattle-chuted”
into their family’s bleak and limited world-view and lifestyle as a child.
Theirs was an intensely rejecting family who sent the message over and
over, “Why don’t you do the world a favor and go play on the freeway.”

“OVERDUE” (Delayed delivery)

“Maternity-agitation.” She has ambivalence and/or anxiety about having a

child or about having this child or about having this child under these
conditions. It is often due to an early non-supportive early life and/or an
“unwelcome wagon” reception at their own birth.

***************************************

“Hanging on.” They are reluctant to let go of the child -- they want to keep
the symbiosis forever. They were insufficiently loved as an infant, and they
are deriving great gratification from having the absolutely unconditional
love reaction from their fetus.

***************************************

“Ho boy!” There is ambivalence and/or anxiety about coming into the
world at this time, with these parents, or under these conditions. It’s an “I
bit off more than I can chew!” possibility reaction.

“OVER-SEXED”

“Desperately seeking Susan.” They are a “love-aholic” who is manic-

frantically trying to “get the God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” from

767
“stand-ins for the original cast” who makes them feel just as rejected as
their mother did in the womb and subsequently.

Not infrequently, the father joined in the process, leaving them utterly
convinced that they’ve “blown it big time” with the “Home Office” (All
that Is).

***************************************

“Crotch-notching.” They are into intimacy-avoidant self-sustaining and

vengeful behavior. They were super-sexualized in a “tantalizing tarantula”
fashion by their mother. She seduced them and then she “slapped” them, in
a seductive-destructive manner. As a result, they are commitment-avoidant,
vulnerability-distrusting, and self-rejecting, seeing themselves as being
unlovable.

They are also on a vengeance vendetta in which they “do unto others what
was done unto them,” as they act out their sexual addiction.

OVERWEIGHT; OBESITY

There are a number of emotional and life history dynamics that can
generate this outcome. In addition, they often “mix and match,” in effect
“doubling up” as motivational systems in the individual.

Here are a few of the most common psychodynamic situations:

“Insecurity.” They have fearfulness and a felt need for “protection.” They
were over-protected and dominated as a child, and now they feel “lost at
sea.” They have a real need to have something to rely upon and to lean on --
an always available ally, and they found it in food.

***************************************

“What’s the point?” They are starved for relevance in their life. They have
found from the very beginning that they are surrounded by people, systems,
environments, activity requirements and situations that do not relate to

768
where they are coming from. They have therefore been in effect
emotionally deprived at a very deep level.

They have responded by “self-medication” in the form of food intake as a

means of “filling the hole inside.”

***************************************

“Anger-absorber.” The weight has the effect of assimilating anger from

within and from without. It functions as an energy-absorbing shield and
buffer for the “slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,” and they use it to
avoid vulnerability.

Furthermore, it is a feeling-deadening emotional insulation and muffler

experiences, so they don’t have to feel what happens to them. They can also
“sit on,” “stuff,” and run away from their feelings -- of which they are
deeply afraid.

They could do little or nothing to fend off the invasions, intrusions and
violations of their intensely dysfunctional family, so they had to develop
some means of insulating themselves.

***************************************

“Squashing themselves.” They are engaged in a power-paranoia reaction.

They are deeply alarmed by their potentials and capabilities, for fear that it
will result in their “running amok,” “steam-rolling,” and/or in being
rejected or abandoned.

***************************************

“Too big for their britches.” It comes from having been reacted to as an
alarmingly potent and powerful being by their family. They were given the
very clear message to keep themselves under control at all costs -- or else.

***************************************

“Stuffing it.” They are suppressing their feelings, and they are unable to
express what they need and desire, and they are avoiding being in touch

769
with themselves. They found out early on that being real led to being hurt
badly in their denial-dominated family.

***************************************

“Lowered attractiveness quotient.” They deflect sexuality and intimacy,

while simultaneously keeping people at a distance. They were the recipient
of invasive sex-ploitation and erotic intrusion from their family, and they
felt no ability to cope with it, other than to find some way to deflect their
interest at the motivational level.

***************************************

“Self-soothing love-substitute.” It may be a food-addiction side-effect or a

grief-avoiding holding back of an “ocean of tears.” It is a means of self-
sustaining through “stroke-substitutes” and oral stimulation, due to self-
rejecting love-starvation and fear of loss.

***************************************

“Abandoned at an early age.” They had to find ways to fend for and sustain
themselves. It can function as “emergency storage” for a “very rainy day.”
They have had to operate as a self-contained “sealed unit” all their life and
they grew up in an insecurity-generating, dysfunctional, and self-immersed
and perhaps “survivalist mentality” family.

***************************************

“Emotional-commotional.” They tend to be quite reactive in their feelings

about things, and to experience things intensely. It is in part temperamental,
and in part the result of having grown up in a dysfunctional family in which
much of great importance and significance occurred in a non-impactable
manner, leaving them with only their emotional reaction to respond with.
They then reacted to the emotional upheavals with self-soothing food.

***************************************

770
“Resentful withholding.” They do a systematic refusal to engage in
emotional investment. They don’t trust anyone as far as they can throw a
grand piano, and they have a good deal of anger over their deprivational life
history. They have a lot of subterranean resentment, and they are intolerant
and unforgiving in their orientation. They are the product of an exploitative
family.

***************************************

“Grief-holding.” There is resulting semi-edema water retention. They were

given the message at the subtle or not so subtle level that they really have
no right to exist, and that they therefore can expect no sustenance or
nurturance. They were also told that they had no right to “wallow in self-
pity.”

The food-fixation can be an effort to find so-called “nurturance” that has

been denied elsewhere. They were intensely deprived emotionally as a
child, and they turned to food as their only means of self-nourishment.

***************************************

“Hunker down in the bunker.” It can be a reaction to great emotional shock

or loss, as the emptiness within becomes too great to bear. They feel devoid
of meaning or purpose, but the attempt to protect themselves from it only
makes it worse. They are suffering from excessively fixed mental attitudes
and thoughts.

They came from an unstable dysfunctional family, and they are determined
to protect themselves from any further such experiences now. They sustain
themselves while simultaneously “adding padding.”

***************************************

“Big is Bad.” It can be a form of power-projection. They come out of a

“Don’t tread on me!” approach and attitude. It then becomes a means of
control, domination and/or protection. They are over-sensitive and self-
reassuringly self-protective via increasing their apparent strength and size in
a “throwing their weight around” pattern. In addition, it gives them the

771
feeling of being powerful, strong, impactful, self-sufficient -- and
invulnerable.

They feel that they need it as a function of their intimidating experiential

history, which was full of domineering, oppressive and authoritarian
parenting. It can be used as a means of “getting back” or revenge on their
family for the treatment they got. The idea is along the lines of, “I’ll show
you what you have done to me! I’ll make myself a disgrace!” Their family
was rejecting, denigrating, exploitative and abusive.

***************************************

“Spoiled pig.” They are a voracious eating machine and a supremely selfish
total taker who “vacuums” their way through life. Their only concern is for
“more input” of any and all kinds, and they are convinced that they have an
absolute right to any and all goodies they want at all times.

They are quite manipulative and malicious about getting it, and they are not
in the least bit hesitant to do whatever it takes to keep those goodies coming
in. They are also systematically vengeful, passive-aggressive and slyly
cruel, out of their intense rage at what they have become and about where
their life is going.

They are the product of extremely convenience-concerned, self-immersed

over-indulgent and under-requiring parents who, in effect, cave in and build
their life around their “little darling” ego-extension.

***************************************

“Grounding and protection.” It can represent a process of keeping the

person here and safer when they are channeling Cosmic or “other realm”
energies or entities.

In all cases (with the exception of the “grounding” situation), it reflects

insecurity and self-rejection, along with feelings of deprivation, scarcity and
loss. It also involves lovelessness and loneliness and a pattern of comfort-
seeking.

772
Their craving for love is expressed in compulsive eating and in
accumulating too many possessions. It shows the fear and need for
protection that they feel, along with their fear of “growing up” and of taking
responsibility for their own life that they family system generated.There are
three types of situation within this general dynamic:

“Love-starved.” They are “stroke”-deprived, love-desperate, and likely to

be over-giving. There is a distinctly self-punitive and, in severe cases, a
self-destructive streak. They are trying to please a family who were
invasively intrusive and wrong-making.

***************************************

“Blast from the past.” There is much unexpressed longing and holding of
unpleasant memories. In some cases, it is a cover for hidden anger and
resistance to forgiving. It then often involves systematic self-“blemishing,”
control-avoidance, and rebelliousness of the “Nobody’s gonna tell ME what
to do!” type. They come from a domineering household in which one parent
colluded with them in their rebellion.

***************************************

“Snail out if its shell.” They have difficulty in coping, and there is a child-
like need for security. They are cushioning themselves with barricades of
material protection. They desire emotional and physical sustenance, with a
real fear of lack and of low income.

The location of the fatty storage is symbolic of the areas of their concerns:

ARMS

“Deprivation-resentment.” They have anger at being denied love. Buried in

their core, they don’t know how to reach out.

LEGS

“Powerlessness-rage.” There is anger at their not being able to take charge

of their life. They have a lack of initiative and no energy, due to nihilistic

773
lethargy.

THIGHS

“Sex slave.” There is stuffed childhood anger over disenfranchisement and

sexualization, often at their father. They feel frustrated about their
difficulties in moving forward in life.

BELLY

“Developmentally arrested.” They are angry at being denied nourishment,

and there is an associated passivity and vulnerability.

HIPS

“Sexual suppression.” There is anger at both parents for being denied their
sexuality and/or over sex-ploitation.

OXYGEN DEPRIVATION -- USUALLY DURING BIRTH

“Who invited YOU!?” They experience no right to be here taking up

resources and space, because “God said so.” It is the result of intense
maternal ambivalence or rejection of having a child or rejecting of having
THIS child.

OZENA (See DISCHARGE FROM THE NOSE, FOUL-SMELLING)

Section 15

774
775
776
O

391

777
O

778
392

393

394

395

396

397

398

779
“PACE-MAKER” (Heart-stimulator -- having to have one)

“Sealed unit.” They are attempting to compensate for or work their way out
of an “urban hermit” heart-shielding self-protection syndrome. They are apt
to be one who is all heart, but who found early that: l) the world did not
want what they had to offer, and 2) that “love is a poison apple” that can’t
be trusted. So they have lived their life in a self-protective and love-
deflecting manner, with a serious inability to let love in.

Now they are trying to change that, or at least to extend the time they have
here to deal with that issue. If they do not deal with this issue after the
operation, their prognosis is rather poor.

“PACE-MAKER” PROBLEMS

“Closed heart.” They are resisting the necessity to open their heart to the
changed world they live in. They are just too distrusting to let go and let
God, so to speak. It is, of course, due to a severely untrustworthy early
experiential history, with its subsequent “self-fulfilling prophecy” effects.

PAGET’S DISEASE (Thickened bones)

“Cosmic abandonment.” They have a profound feeling that nobody cares.

The feeling is that there is no longer (or there never was) any foundation to
build on. They feel abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that Is), and that
there is nothing out there to sustain them. So they became their own “pillar
of strength” -- bodily. It is the result of severe deprivation as a child, with a
resulting emotional starvation and despairing desperation. (See BONE
PROBLEMS)

PAIN

“Karma beliefs.” They are engaged in guilt-based self-punishment and

atonement-seeking. They have a deep feeling of separation and sinfulness
arising from massive guilt-induction from their family for who they were,
what they needed, what they did, and what went down in the family.

780
 ***************************************

“Trying to slip one past the Cosmos.” It is God or Nature’s way of warning
them that they are off the path, and that something is out of balance. It
involves conflict and congestion as they work out an undesirable condition.
They now have to clean up their act and the mess they’ve created. If this is
a chronic pattern, it is the result of constant corner-cutting by their family as
a lifestyle.

***************************************

“Victim-tripping.” They have a belief in bondage and victimization. It has

resulted in their being in a relationship that hurts, that is destructive, and
that is exploitative. It is a pattern that was generated in a severely
dysfunctional and hostile family.

***************************************

“Repressed rage.” They are sitting on a lot of resentment-rage that they are
afraid to express or act on. Their life is not working, and they are highly
frustrated with that, but they dare not do anything about it. They come from
an exploitative and suppressive patriarchal family who made it crystal clear
that to manifest anger is the kiss of death.

ACHING PAIN

“Heart-smarts.” There has been deprivation, a deep need, or a desire for

something that is not being fulfilled. There is an aching imperative for
change and fulfillment. They have an intense longing for love and a
desperate need for being held, arising from a feeling of undeservingness
created by a severely rejecting family. They are being given feedback they
need to heal this deep heart-hurt.

BURNING PAIN

“Seething volcano.” They are sitting on a great deal of resentment that is

causing them considerable discomfort. They come from an exploitative,

781
oppressive, dysfunctional and/or patriarchal family. They are in need of
healing this early helplessness hurt and its resulting resentment.

DULL PAIN

“Stoic trip.” They are resigned to the “fact” things are never going to get
any better and that they just have to “bite the bullet.” As a result, they tend
to “numb out” and to grudgingly forebear things. They come from an
intractably dysfunctional family system. They are being prompted to
develop a more initiative action-taking approach.

INTERMITTENT PAIN

“Ya never know.” They have the feeling that things are more or less out of
control, and that they are unable to determine the flow of events in their life.
Their experience is that the Universe keeps sending “curve balls” when they
least expect it.

They were the “sane one” in a dysfunctional family upon everyone

unconsciously relied. As a result, they felt responsible for everything and
the dysfunctionality of the family was most disconcerting to them. They are
learning to “share the load” and to find the limits of their responsibilities.

SHARP PAIN

“Getting their attention.” They are prone to ignore important emotional

processes and issues in their life. They grew up in a denial-dominated
dysfunctional family. They are being reminded things don’t just go away,
that they have to be faced and dealt with.

STABBING PAIN

“Sudden attacks.” They have the experience that they are frequently
boundary-violated, “bushwhacked” and “broad-sided” in their life. It comes
from growing up in an anger-dominated dysfunctional family who were
forever attacking each other at one level or another. They are being
prompted to develop their ability to trust genuinely trustworthy systems,
people and situations.

782
STINGING PAIN

“Totally attention-arresting.” They are intensely aware that something is

very wrong with their situation. It operates as a continuous reminder that
“they asked for it.” They come from an accusatory and rejecting family.
They are being prodded to seek the healing necessary to alleviate this heart
wound.

THROBBING PAIN

“Never out of mind.” They have a propensity to rehearse and rehash past
hurts, and to nurse old wounds. They are the product of a never-endingly
dysfunctional family who bore grudges and who focused on the negative at
all times. They are being given the message that they need to leave their
family’s pattern behind. (See the affected areas for more information)

PAIN AT OVULATION

“Tripod-rage.” They have a resentment of femininity, of maternity, and/or

the patriarchy. They feel restricted or required of, and they resist it. It is a
function of the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs that was
passed on from their mother or from direct experience of exploitation, sex-
ploitation and/or oppression from their father and/or society at large.

***************************************

“Peter Panella.” It represents an unwillingness to grow up and to be an adult

female arising from possessive, over-protective and/or under-requiring
parenting. They want to be “taken care of” for the rest of their life. Their
family was the “keep ‘em around the old homestead” type.

PAIN BETWEEN THE SHOULDER BLADES

“Vulnerability-avoidance.” They are encountering emotional opening or

emotional compression problems. They are unwilling to open their “heart
center,” due to untrustworthy parenting. Now they are being driven to face
this issue by their circumstances because they can no longer afford to
maintain this pattern.

783
PAINFUL BOWEL MOVEMENTS

“Holding in.” They are controlling their position in life by trying to create a
secure, problem-free and comfortable lifestyle and environment. They are
over-concerned with material comfort and physical survival.

They can’t give, they hoard, and they are highly possessive. They forcefully
hold on to all possible resources, possessions, expressions and extensions of
themselves. It is an “armored anus” pattern in which control matters more
than anything else. They are intensely feeling-suppressing, and they tend
strongly to be asexual.

It all comes from a severely stringent and suppressive dysfunctional family

in which they felt that they had to cover all the bases for safety’s sake,
because no one else had the motivation or the wherewithal to do so. They
took over the responsibility for all that happened in the family in a context
in which whatever they did was “never good enough.” It was a highly
patriarchal and penetratingly perfectionistic parenting pattern. (See
BOWEL MOVEMENT QUALITIES)

PAINFUL INTERCOURSE

“Erotic avoidance.” It was generated by an underlying compulsive

immaturity generated by a “Don’t grow up!” injunction by their family.
Often there was a strong sex-ploitative element in their parent(s) handling
of them.

PAINFUL MENSTRUATION

“Femininity-avoidance.” They are engaging in a refusal to acknowledge or

manifest that they are a woman, arising out of an underlying hatred of
themselves and/or of women and of womankind. They thoroughly dislike
their body, and they are deeply angry at themselves. There is in effect no
self-acceptance or self-love, and they are unable to forgive themselves.

It is a pattern that was generated in a family in which they were

systematically devalued, denigrated and disenfranchised, personally and as

784
a female. They felt powerless and a second-class citizen and they hated it.
This then turned into hatred of themselves and of womanhood.

PAINFUL URINATION

“Pissed off.” They are intensely angry at their life, and they are looking for
the one responsible for it. They feel betrayed and victimized, especially by
their intimates, particularly those of the other gender. They have the feeling
that the parent of the other gender is the cause of all their problems.
However, underneath all this, they have the uneasy feeling that they are
really getting their “just desserts.” This whole pattern came about as a result
of their being sexualized and sex-ploitated in a seductive-destructive guilt-
inducing manner in a severely dysfunctional family.

PAIN IN THE ABDOMEN

“Survival-anxiety.” They are laboring under intense concerns over whether

they can really handle life. There is much felt powerlessness arising from
“skid row” programming and learned helplessness in the face of a severely
dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Nit-picking.” They are trying to cover all the details, to organize and
coordinate everything, to analyze the situation, and to meet all the needs in
the “right” way. They are into perfectionism, detail-domination and an
inability to see the forest for the trees. It is a pattern that got started in a
patriarchal and perfectionistic family.

***************************************

“Over-critical.” They are into a compulsion to help others that are carried
out unwisely. They have a great desire to be needed, in order to inflate a
damaged ego or to manipulate someone. They are pushing ideas or things
on people in an unwanted “rescue-tripping” pattern that is the product of
their feeling responsible for “straightening things out” in their dysfunctional
family.

785
 ***************************************

“Cinderella/Cinderfella.” They feel used and abused, rushed and over-

controlled, like they are in servitude. They feel what they give is not used,
appreciated or utilized for the intended purposes. They are possessive and
emotionally unbalanced, with no sense of being loved, wanted or needed. It
is a pattern in which they were used and abused for self-immersed purposes
in a dysfunctional family.

PAIN IN THE JOINTS

“Judgmental.” They feel unloved and “not good enough,” with a resulting
resentful bitterness and criticality. They are very negatively evaluative of
others, and they are convinced that others won’t help them.

They are very angry that people won’t “carry their load,” so that they have
to take on what they consider an unjust load. They are full of projected self-
disgust, finding in others what they most dislike in themselves.

No one was ever there for them, and since they felt that everything that
went down was their fault, they also felt they didn’t deserve anyone to be
there for them, bottom line. They felt that it all fell to them to do the
necessaries because no one else could be trusted to do so or to do it RIGHT.

***************************************

“Lilliput” (tied down with a million little ropes). They feel roped down,
restrained and restricted. They are not allowing themselves to develop their
full potential, due to severe circumstantial constraints, and they desperately
want to be free to move around and to make something of themselves. Yet
they feel that if they commit to carrying out their own destiny and goals, it
would result in the devastation of others.

They were the “family hoist,” the “pivot person” on whom everyone
depended in their enmeshed and dysfunctional family. Theirs was a “vast
wasteland” and “dour destiny” family culture, in which they never knew
when something would go wrong, just that it would, sure as the sun rises.

786
 ***************************************

“Negative faith.” There are long-standing maladjustments and stony

encrustations based on internal conflicts -- often between a desire to do
something and a fear of failure. They have great resistance and emotional
struggle, with a considerable amount of habitual anxiety and fear, along
with expectations that of the worst case scenario. They are the product of a
perfectionistic and demanding patriarchal family who had a strongly
negative and wrong-making focus.

***************************************

“What’s good for General Bullmoose is good for EVERYBODY!!!” They

are operating with a strong will, rigid intentions, intense opinions, and an
abiding inability to change with changing circumstances. They are
forcefully opinion-pushing, and they put out a steady stream of skeptical
criticism. Calcium growths indicate the presence of hatred and a severely
inflexible mind. They come from a patriarchal and perhaps authoritarian
family culture in which “might was right.” (See the body part(s) affected for
more information) (Also, see JOINT PROBLEMS; RHEUMATOID
ARTHRITIS; TENALGIA; TENDON PROBLEMS)

PAIN IN THE MUSCLES

“No way, Jose!” They are resistant to new experiences and they are refusing
to move in life. Unsettling memories are surfacing, and they must confront
issues that have been long put off.

They grew up in a damaging dysfunctional family who were intensely

denial-dominated, resulting in a systematic reality-avoidance pattern.

***************************************

“Sinfulness.” There is guilt-based self-punishment and atonement-seeking,

and/or a belief in bondage, victimization and victim-tripping. In any case,
they have a deep feeling of separation and non-deservingness arising from
massive guilt-induction their family for who they were, what they needed,
what they did, and what went down in the family.

787
 ***************************************

“Self-inhibition.” They have great difficulty coordinating the execution of

things, integrating ideas of what is wanted to be accomplished with the
pragmatic results they are getting, and dealing with the feelings and issues
associated with success.

They have little sense of competence and confidence, and they are having
significant problems in mobility, flexibility and activity. They have to be
extremely inhibited and careful in all they do, or they become immobilized
and unable to take action.

It arises from an intensely self-distrust-inducing “keep ‘em around the old

homestead” family, who programmed them to be super-successful (for the
family only), and to otherwise fail. They have “come up a cropper” in
reaction to the re-emergence or continued confrontation with this dilemma,
and it has effectively immobilized them.

PAIN IN THE RIBS

“Skid Row Syd.” They operate with deprivation-expectations and

separation-and abandonment-anxiety. They fear that they are going to
ultimately end up alone in cold water flat or on the streets.

It arises from a self-immersed and possessive parenting pattern in which

they were subjected to lack of consideration of their needs, threats of
abandonment, demands that they conform totally to the parent(s)
expectations, and systematic subconscious, subterranean and subtle
programming to never succeed in the world or in relationships. There was
also the injunction that went, “If we can’t have you, then you are going to
end up alone, alienated and totally deprived.”

RIGHT SIDE RIB PAINS

“Self-distrust.” They are experiencing fears or manifestations of self-

sabotage and “Skid Row-seeking.”

LEFT SIDE RIB PAINS

788
“Self-disgust.” There is significant self-rejection, and they have the feeling
that they somehow deserve to end up “on Skid Row.”

PAIN IN THE MUSCLES BETWEEN THE RIBS

“Skid Row programming.” They feel that somehow they can expect to end
up alone in a cold water flat or on “Skid Row.” It arises from self-immersed
and possessive parenting, which resulted in the injunction never to be able
to connect or commit to anyone or anything but the family, along with the
message that they deserve no better than “Skid Row” if they break the
injunction.

PAIN ON MOVEMENT

“Don’t move!” They experience the “balance of the Cosmos” rides on their
every move, and that they have to be extremely careful with what they do.
They are the product of an extremely blame-throwing and responsibility-
and accountability-avoidant family who gave them a very strong “Don’t
move until I tell you to!” injunction. Now they feel the “weight of the
world” and the “brunt of the pain” of the human race.

PAIN TOLERANCE -- HIGH

“What, me worry?” They are severely denial-dominated and reality-

avoidant as a result of having grown up in a family in which that was
massively demanded and enforced.

***************************************

“The Machine.” They are intensely determined to not be done in or to be

overcome by any form of vulnerability or weakness. It is a “matter of life
and death” to them. This pattern arose out of their feeling utterly alone on
their own and/or feeling that they were the “buck stops here” person in their
family, due to their being regarded as an inconvenience and/or as the
“family hoist” that holds up the whole system like the car repair garage
rack.

PAIN TOLERANCE -- LOW

789
They are into “I knew it! -- I’m going to die!” emotional commotion
reactions. 90% of the experience of pain is psychological, in that it is the
activation of the mid-brain or emotional center that creates most of the
sensation. The physical basis of pain is primarily in the skin, not in deeper
organs, and several inner organs are insensitive to pain.

Pain is our warning system that something harmful is happening. However,

after the initial shot over the bow, the vast bulk of the pain experience is in
the interpretations of what it means.

Consequently, hyper-sensitivity to pain represents a generalized dread

freakout about life with associated emotional reactions when something
untoward happens. It is an over-reaction to actual damage and danger, and a
catastrophizing anticipation of much more serious outcomes.

It is a function of a pronounced propensity to go to and stay at the “worst

case scenario.” They live in the “cellar of existence” -- survival issues.
They are chronically fearful and easily alarmed because they have little
trust of the universe.

They therefore over-react to the “danger signal” of pain with massive

amounts of anxiety and implication reactions about what it all means and
where it is all going. This turns the pain experience into an intolerable
torture.

It is the result of a severely dysfunctional family in which the worst often

DID happen, producing a conditioned calamity-expectation process. It is a
pattern that got started in early infancy, when there was very little
protection, sustenance or support.

***************************************

“Enough already!” The experience is of “salt in the wound.” They feel like
life is adding insult to injury, and that their experiential history has been
replete with devastation, deprivation and denigration. They find the current
process entirely too much, as a result.

790
They have undergone much emotional suffering and pragmatic stress in
their life, and they find being demanded to endure physical pain as well is
the “straw that broke the camel’s back” -- and they simply can’t do it.

They are the product of a rather massively guilt-inducing, atonement-

demanding, accusatory and dysfunctional family, and they are likely to have
been the “linchpin” for the whole system also. They were systematically
wounded on the emotional capability level in their severely dysfunctional
family. This produced a severely over-responsible and self-blaming,
punishment-seeking and success-avoidant lifestyle.

***************************************

“Woe is me!” They have a very strong experience of being the “butt of the
Universe,” in the sense of its playing “Kick you” with them. They tend to
be quite self-immersed and egocentric, with a pronounced pattern of
complaining and “groan-moaning.” It started in their severely dysfunctional
family, where about the only way they could get any attention was to play
up their “injuries and tragedies.”

PALATITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE PALATE)

PALLEGRA (Niacin deficiency -- skin eruptions, gastrointestinal

disturbances. It can lead to nervous disorders and dementia.) (Also spelled
Pellagra)

“It’s all my fault!” They have a pronounced tendency to feel negatively

evaluated and even attacked for their deficiencies and for the resulting
untoward environmental events, as they experience it. There is a
considerable lack of harmony and peace in their life.

They tend to be plagued by shame, embarrassment and guilt, along with

inferiority, low self-esteem, ostracism and obstruction. They take on too
much accountability and responsibility, and they try to do too much too
well, as they try to “make up for” their perceived lacks and their “badness.”
They feel like an “alarming Martian.”

791
They have great trouble being able to say “no” to demands and expectations
from their environment, with the result they end up a perfectionistic
workaholic who tries too hard. It is a pattern that started in a wrong-making,
over-expecting and denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

PALSY (Involuntary tremor with paralysis)

“One and only one way.” They are getting stuck, due to paralyzing
thoughts. They are fixated on a particular mindset, mental approach, and
paradigmatic model. They want to “make things all right,” out of having to
be the one responsible for everything that happens.

They are extremely rigid in how they think that should be. They are trapped
in implication-terror at the thought of things being different from what they
imagine or of trying a new approach to things. They come from a similar
family system.

***************************************

“Cosmic paranoia.” They are full of guilt and rejection of life, they are not
able to forgive others or themselves. They have an intensely anxious
relationship with the Universe that is full of fear, uncertainty and insecurity.
They have a “God will KILL me if I do anything different!” feeling. They
have ended up feeling stagnated and immobilized.

It is the result of a very rigid adaptation to a severely dysfunctional and

frightening family who themselves manifested a very fearfully narrow
viewpoint and lifestyle. They played the role of the “family hoist” who was
the pivotal point of everything.

PANCREAS PROBLEMS

“Love-incompetent.” They are having difficulties in integrating and

expressing love. They don’t believe they deserve love, and that “Love is a
poison apple.” They have a lot of guilt and feelings of lack of value, in a
low self-esteem process.

792
It all developed out of a severe worth-anxiety process that arose from
intensely ambivalent acceptance-rejection reactions from their family.

***************************************

“I-me-mine.” They are highly egocentric and egotistical in their

functioning. They are engaged in over-indulgence and/or in self-indulgence,
emotional excess, negative self-expression, and/or violence. Their
underlying attitude is the world owes them a living, a loving and a lavish,
and they feel betrayed when it doesn’t come through for them.

They come from an intensely self-immersed and selfish family who could
care less about ecological impact or contribution. It generated a compulsive
worth-proof-needing, in the form of a constant input of positive and sweet
experiences, along with a simultaneous continuation of the family culture.

***************************************

“There is no joy in Bloodville.” They have an angry sourness and bitterness

about life, with a feeling that life has lost its sweetness. They have the
experience that their quality of life is out of control, and that “life sucks.”
There is a frustrated desire to acquire goods and friendships, along with a
sense of their goals and plans being disrupted.

As they experience it, there is no joy, fun, caring and sharing in their life,
and they have lost touch with the enjoyment of life. They feel they can’t
create anything worthwhile for themselves.

They are harboring a good deal of anger and resentment about all this, and
they are intensely judgmental and rejecting of everything and everyone.
Now they have reached the point where they are rejecting everything,
because they feel totally rejected by the Universe.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional and unimpactable family

system in which they were the “responsible one” who had to sacrifice their
joy to the altar of disaster-deflection.

PANCREATIC CANCER

793
“Where’s the exit?” They have in effect given up on life, and they want out
of here NOW. They are intensely embittered, and they feel that they in
effect have no quality of life or reason to continue. They feel utterly unable
to make anything better in their life, and they don’t want to bother trying
any more.

They are sitting on a great deal of resentment-rage and disgusted distrust

about the world and other people. To them, it is as if they are surrounded by
a “ship of fools” in an insane world, and they want out. They see no
possibility of anything working out or of any sweetness in living.

It all got started in a severely ambivalent and subtly rejecting dysfunctional

family, who made it quite clear to that at the underlying message level that
they had no right to expect a good life. They reacted initially with a
frenetic/frantic effort to “get the God Housekeeping Seal of Approval.”
Now they have “thrown in the towel,” and their whole concentration is on
the Ultimate Route Out. (See CANCER)

PANCREATITIS (Inflammation of the pancreas)

“Bitter rejection.” They are disgusted, frustrated and angry, because

continuously rejecting of everything they come in contact with. They come
from an equally begrudging and grumbling dissatisfied dysfunctional
family.

PANIC ATTACKS; PANIC DISORDER

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are experiencing a fear of what they would do if

they “let fly with one.” It is usually set off by symbolic or actual
precipitating circumstances that activate their underlying motivational
system and/or memories of their past.

There are a number of possibilities here. It can be:

1) “evil-anxiety,” where they feel they are “bad,” and that they would do
dreadful things, or

794
2) “betrayal-anxiety,” a fear that if they did what they want or said what
they see, they would destroy the family, or “sex-ploitation-rage,” in which
they are afraid of what they would do in reaction to having been subjected
to invasive possessive and intrusive sexual attentions from their family.

This whole pattern started in the womb, where there was originally a
massive rejection reaction from their mother, in fear of the individual’s
great capabilities (inherent in their soul).

PARALYSIS

“Don’t move!” Their experience is that the “balance of the Cosmos” rides
on every move. They don’t dare move forward on anything, feeling that
they might set off World War III. Now they feel the “weight of the world”
and the “brunt of the pain” of the human race.

They are the product of an extremely blame-throwing and responsibility-

and accountability-avoidant family, who gave them a very strong “Don’t
move until I tell you to!” injunction.

***************************************

“They’re after me!” They are undergoing immobilizing fear and terror, a
feeling of utter helplessness. They feel they are under attack from the
Universe, and that nothing is trustworthy. They are in a thorough-going
escape mode, and they are doing all they can to avoid an unwanted task or
experience and/or to escape a situation or person.

They are experiencing an intense resistance to life, people and things in a

super-stubbornness reaction. They are fearful of what the future might
bring, and they are highly reluctant to engage with life. They are mentally
and/or emotionally confused, they feel overwhelmed and inadequate, and
they lack self-control at this point.

It is the result of having come up in an irrational and/or chaotic family, in

which there was nothing they could do to change the course of events, to
improve the situation, or to provide themselves a better experience.

795
RIGHT SIDE PARALYSIS

A “Don’t do!” injunction is being activated. They were programmed not to

be effective in the world.

LEFT SIDE PARALYSIS

Their “Don’t be!” injunction is operating. They were told by their family
that what they are is not acceptable.

PARALYSIS OF THE DIAPHRAGM (Iron lung situation)

“I don’t deserve to live.” They feel they have no right to exist and take up
air and space. They have an overwhelming fear of God, and they are
convinced that they will be struck dead if they make any waves or demands.

There is an inability to breathe for themselves, and to a systematic

suppression of any form of crying, due to guilt-and shame-inducing
parenting. They feel stifled and also that it is unsafe to take charge of their
own life. They are intensely inhibited against free expression, and they are
full of unresolved guilt and suppressed grief.

They feel “left out in the cold,” and that there is no place for them here. It is
the result of intrauterine and subsequent severe rejection and of massive “If
it weren’t for you . . .” and accusatory parenting.

PARASITES; PARASITIC WORMS

“At effect, not at cause.” They are therefore feeling-dominated, in a letting

their feelings run them, rather than their taking responsibility for effective
manifestation of their reactions to things. They are also giving their power
to others, letting them take over everything in their life.

It’s a pattern that started in a “never good enough” parenting situation, in

which they frantically tried over and over to get the “God Housekeeping
Seal of Approval” -- and forever failed to do so.

***************************************

796
“I don’t have what it takes.” They feel that they lack the secret for success
and worth that everyone else has, and that they have to keep trying with
“standins for the original cast” in re-runs of the original scenario until they
get it right, finally.

They are terrified to strike out on their own or to stand on their own rights
and on their own ground and two feet, for fear of the ultimate “blow-it.”
They have no trust of themselves, and they are convinced there is an
“answer” that they don’t have and others do, so they keep on trying to find
the “key.”

In the meantime, they turn everything over to “those in the know” or to

those they think hold the “Golden Orb” of “Final Validation.” As a result,
they have to deal with constant emotional commotion and external
interference and exploitation in their lives. They are the product of an
accusative and blame-throwing family.

PARASYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“Red-orange alert.” They are continuously in a state of mild agitation,

somewhat along the lines of Don Knotts in his constant anxiety mode. They
feel somehow at least slightly endangered at all times. It comes from
growing up in an unpredictably dysfunctional family in which things would
come at them “off the wall,” so to speak.

***************************************

“Chronically angry.” They are forever feeling thwarted, invaded, and even
violated. They are instantly irritable and resentfully reactive most of the
time. They are the product of a severely frustrating and unassailably
dysfunctional family who continuously subjected them to enraging
experiences.

PARATHYROID PROBLEMS

“Catastrophic expectations.” They operate with constant anxiety, worry and

tenseness. They have the feeling that they are one step away from calamity
in an unpredictable and uncontrollable manner, and that they have to be on

797
at least “yellow alert” at all times to see if they can’t head disaster off at the
pass. They also have a good deal of resentment over their whole situation
and life pattern, about which they are too afraid to do anything. It comes
from having been in a chaotic dysfunctional family.

PARESIS (Paralysis due to brain disease, usually syphilis)

“God is Al Capone!” They have a profound and abiding distrust of the

Universe in which their experience is that the “Home Office” (All that Is)
has taken charge of their life in a highly detrimental manner.

They feel an immobilizing fear and terror, along with a feeling of utter
helplessness. As a result, they have an abiding distrust of the Universe, and
they have “thrown in the towel” on managing their own affairs or those of
the world around them. They are mentally and emotionally confused, and
they feel overwhelmed and inadequate, with the result they have lost their
self-control at this point.

They feel that they are under attack from the Universe, and that nothing is
trustworthy. They are having an intense resistance to life, people and things
in general, in a “super-stubbornness” reaction.

This all developed as a result of having come up in a chaotic and irrational

family in which there was nothing they could do to change the course of
events or to provide themselves a better experience. There was never
anyone there to meet their needs. Indeed, they had to meet the needs of the
situation, including their being sex-ploitated and shamed for their sexuality.

PARKINSON’S DISEASE (Progressive palsy)

“I don’t dare let go!” There is an intense fearfulness and an overweening

desire to control everything and everyone about every aspect of every issue,
situation and under-taking. They have no faith in the Universe and in life,
and they feel alone and unsafe in an uncaring world.

They have the complete conviction that all hell will break loose and
everything will go to hell in a bread basket, unless they personally hands on
determine the purpose, flow and outcome of everything. It comes from

798
being the only “sane one” and the “family hoist” in a severely dysfunctional
family. (See PALSY)

PAROXYSMAL AURICULAR TACHYCARDIA (See “STABBING

HEART PAINS”)

“PARROT FEVER” (Lung disease with fever)

“Grit and bear it.” They are joy-avoidant, happiness-squashing, and love-
deflecting, out of a fear of the Universe. They feel unworthy of living fully,
and they are alone, sad and non-belonging, with little sense of acceptance.

They tend to get into consuming passionate commitments that lead

nowhere, and to become involved in unrequited love relationships. They are
full of family taboos, social restrictions and moral inhibitions, all of which
generate a great deal of resentment which they are frightened of expressing.
They come from a highly exploitative and shame-inducing dysfunctional
family.

PELVIS PROBLEMS

“Headlong retreat.” They are engaged in self-alienation and rejection of

their deepest feelings and thoughts -- of their personhood. They are
blocking their creative, procreative and propelling powers and aspects of
themselves.

They have retreated into their core, with a poor connection between their
inner being and their grounding to the world. They are preventing
themselves from moving forward and from thrusting themselves into the
fray, and they are afraid of life. They are the product of a severely
enmeshed and competence-and confidence-undermining family.

***************************************

“Isolate.” They are disengaging from their relationship to those around

them. They are avoiding social, emotional and sexual connection. This all
arises out of basic worth issues, survival-uncertainty, and lovability-

799
questioning. They are afraid of a repetition of their home life, which was
highly untrustworthy.

***************************************

“Initiative-avoidance.” They have a number of unfulfilled ambitions, due to

their being resistant to actualizing them. They are emotionally ungrounded
and pragmatically disengaged. They are out of balance with themselves and
the Universe, and they are afraid to stand on their own or to manifest their
individuality, independence and selfhood. They are deeply ashamed of
themselves, especially their more earthy components like their sexual
nature and their elimination processes.

Their “root chakra” energies (those having to do with self-maintenance and

survival) are not flowing well, due to their damming up the energies
through insidious prudishness and habitual negativity of thought.

This all started very early in life, when it was made very clear they were not
to manifest or develop themselves, and that they were “bad, wrong and
evil” for having personal power and biologic functions. In effect, they are
the product of an “American Gothic” severely puritanical family or its
functional equivalent.

***************************************

“Power-avoidance.” They are operating out of an underlying abandonment-

anxiety. They are suffering from deep-seated guilt for not having been more
aggressive in life, for letting others make decisions for them. They come
from a domineering, authoritarian and oppressive family who would not let
them claim their personal potency.

***************************************

“Sexually shut down.” They are intensely repressed and suppressed

sexually. They are deeply afraid of their erotic nature, and they want
nothing to do with it. They were made to feel horribly “bad, wrong and
evil” for having sexual qualities, desires and manifestations.

800
It all got started in a “BAN” (“Bostonians Against Nature”) reaction-
formation-saturated suppressive family. Naturally, sexuality was the
continuous theme that permeated the family culture at the subterranean
level, and there was a great deal of “seduce-slap” entice-attack behavior
occurring around the issue of affection, bonding, closeness, love-ability and
vulnerability. There may also have been highly taboo sexual violation and
secret-keeping.

RIGHT PELVIS PROBLEMS

“Self-suppression.” They are into power-and success-avoidance, along with

a pattern of self-suppression and possibly of sexual shutdown.

LEFT PELVIS PROBLEMS

“Self-shame.” They have deep-seated shame and guilt about their needs,
wants and desires, along with deep conflicts over their sexuality.

PENIS PROBLEMS

“Raging rapist.” They are power-fiend so hell-bent on dominating and

domineering everyone. It is the result of their mother’s having totally
squashed and squelched them throughout their childhood, so that now they
are grimly set on getting “on top of” everyone.

***************************************

“Male shame.” They are having the experience of being a “moral cretin” for
being male. They are either competence-anxious about their ability to carry
off the male role requirements or they are guilt-ridden over the state of the
male race and/or their own history of functioning.

In all events, their mother was domineering, full of “tripod-rage” (the

irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs) wrong-making/accusatory,
and engulfingly dependent.

***************************************

801
“Ferocious fierceness.” They are into piercing penetration in their mania for
making an impact. They are driven to leave their imprint on everything they
encounter. This came from being completely ignored and devalued by their
family, so that they couldn’t make a difference in anything that happened.
They ended up furiously determined to “prove” themselves. (See GENITAL
PROBLEMS -- MALE)

PEPTIC ULCER (Lesion in the upper digestive tract caused by stomach

acid)

“Suppressing freakouts.” They have a very strong fear of not coming up to

snuff, of not being good enough. They are convinced that it is their
responsibility to please everyone. They are intensely anxious to please, but
they suffer from the conviction that they don’t have “the right stuff.”

This is an area of intense “rawness,” causing severe pain and upset. They
are suppressing strong anger, fear, aggression or nervousness. They are not
being able to take in and assimilate what is happening to them, the realities
they have to deal with. They are therefore extremely bothered about their
“failure.” It is the result of “never good enough” parenting.

PERICARDIUM PROBLEMS (The lining around heart)

“Island unto themselves.” They are emotionally closed, love-deflecting and

intensely insensitive. They are convinced that “love is a poison apple” as a
result of untrustworthy parenting, and they have closed their heart. They
have little trust, faith, or capacity for love and joy.

PERINEUM PROBLEMS (The area between the anus and the genitals)

“Self-revulsion.” They have strong shame feelings about their fundamental

beingness, in the form of intense rejection of their physical nature,
especially around elimination and sexuality. They also feel basically unsafe
in the world, because they “don’t deserve to be here.”

They were made to feel profoundly “bad, wrong and evil” as a child for
what and who they were. The result is deep questioning about their right to
exist.

802
PERIPHERAL NERVE FUNCTIONING IMPAIRMENT

“Shadow-shoving.” They are systematically suppressing all experiences and

expressions of aspects of themselves that they are convinced are so
unacceptable as to require total elimination of manifestation. These aspects
have caused them so much pain and hurt that they don’t want to feel them.

The “unacceptable” aspects were reacted to with great punishment,

ostracism and rejection when they manifested these qualities and
capabilities as a child, so they are now dedicated to never contacting them.

They are “going dead” mentally and emotionally -- totally retreating into
their core and shutting down feeling, out of fears that they are in a “dog-eat-
dog world” in which people are out to do them in. They are vulnerability-
avoidant, and they are operating with feelings that the environment is truly
dangerous. They have a deep and abiding distrust of intimacy out of an
“intimate enemy” experience in their exploitative and untrustworthy family.

***************************************

“Cut off.” They are withholding love and consideration, and they are love-
deflecting and love-distrusting. To them, love is a poison apple that they
want absolutely nothing to do with. It is a result of wrong-making and self-
immersed parenting.

PERITONEUM PROBLEMS (Abdominal wall lining)

“This is an up with which I will no longer put!” They are fed up with the
“slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.” They have a deep-seated
resentment of their lot in life, the hard knocks they have experienced (or are
experiencing). They feel they have assimilated far more than their share of
negativity, and they are putting up a protective shield of vulnerability-and
involvement-avoidance as a result. It reflects an underlying distrust of the
Universe generated by a “poison apple” dispensing dysfunctional family.

PERNICIOUS ANEMIA (Gradual reduction of red cells, leading to

weakness, nervous system problems and digestive disorders)

803
“I just can’t go on like this any more.” They are feeling overwhelmed and
exhausted by the requirements of life. Rest, joy and love seem beyond their
range or rights, as far as they are concerned.

There is an insufficiency of sustaining inputs of resources and support, and

they feel overloaded and drained out, due to an excessive sense of
responsibility. There is intense deprivation-grief and little trust in the
Universe. They are the product of an exploitative and responsibility-
dumping dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“But not for me.” They have a super-serious and catastrophic expectations
approach to life. They don’t feel “good enough” to deserve even the basic
sustenance resources. They feel undeserving of joy and love, and that God
will destroy them if they have any. They feel that they have to be in
continuous self-sacrificing service, yet they don’t feel that what they have to
offer is worth anything.

They are suffering from a profound sense of helplessness, haplessness and

hopelessness, and they are driven by an underlying intense depression and
sorrow. They are therefore systematically life-negating and love-refusing,
and in effect, they are throwing in the towel. It is the result of severely
harsh, exploitative and aggressively attacking mothering.

“PETITE MAL” (Small seizures)

“Fear-freakout.” They have a sense of persecution and pressure from the

environment, along with a feeling of great struggle. They are rejecting of
life, and they have propensity to violence towards the self.

There is a hidden fear amounting to severe “run amok-anxiety” and agitated

anticipation of a potential homicidal rampage from themselves. The little
seizures are fear paroxysms and intense resentment-energy releases.

There is an extreme need to escape from the experiences of life, along with
a great fear of the expectations of society. There is a pronounced sense of

804
being outclassed and overwhelmed by the world, along with a tremendous
resentment of their situation.

It came from having too much expected of them, either for what they were
capable of or for a child. If the epilepsy appeared in childhood, it added to
the sense of their being incapable and “broken brained,” which only fueled
the flames of the situation. (See SEIZURES)

PFEIFFER’S DISEASE (See MONONUCLEOSIS)

“PHANTOM LIMB” (Sensed presence of an absent limb)

“Deep regrets.” They have an intense sense of unfinished business, and they
are full of “If only...” feelings. Their experience is that they should be able
to complete their intentions and purposes, and that somehow it got derailed.

Underlying all this is a deep-seated sense of guilt and moral responsibility

for making sure everything is right in the world. It is the result of
performance-contingent love from their parents, often to the
accompaniment of perfectionistic expectations.

“PHANTOM LIMB” PAIN

“You asked for it, asshole!” Their experience is they deserve their negative
circumstances, and that they have to atone for their “evilness” and
“accountability” for “all they have done/been.” The result is a severe self-
punishment reaction in the form of the “phantom pain.” They are the
product of moralistic, perfectionistic, wrong-making parenting. (See the
particular limb(s) involved for more information)

PHILTRUM PROBLEMS (The indented area below the nose in the center
of the upper lip)

“Run down.” They are manifesting low life energy, and their sexual
manifestation is diminished, due to being emotionally, physically and/or
sexually abused. This issue is now surfacing and calling for rectification.

PHLEBITIS (Potentially lethal floating blood clot in the blood vessels)

805
“Trapped.” They have an intense anger and frustration with their lives, and
they feel caught in a manner in which there is no escape. They feel that
their situation can’t be alleviated, and that their problems are insoluble,
given the nature of the world.

They are blaming others for the limitations and lack of joy in their life that
they are experiencing. Their experience is that they are surrounded by a
“ship of fools” and by irrelevant resources that simply don’t meet the needs
of the situation. It comes from having had to take over the helm of a
rudderless, highly incompetent and dysfunctional family from a very early
age. (See the affected area(s) for more information)

PICK’S DISEASE (Degenerative brain disease affecting the frontal and

temporal lobes)

“Comprehension-collapse.” They have lost the ability to accept, organize,

store, integrate and interpret information, with the result they can no longer
make decisions or function on their own volition. They are having a
profound emotional and disorganized reaction to this. It is the result of
confusion-inducing and very restrictive parenting.

PIMPLES

“Mountains out of molehills.” They are subject to small outbursts of anger,

due to a felt lack of respect and right to make their own decisions. They feel
intensely interfered with, and they are feeling the effects of frustrated
personal potency.

They have a great deal of resentment about their whole situation. They also
feel underneath that they are somehow worthless or lacking, and that they
are therefore deserving of such treatment. It comes from a harm-avoidant
and/or wrong-making family. (See ACNE; BLACKHEADS;
WHITEHEADS)

“PINCHED NERVE”

“Oh no you don’t!” They are getting “saber-rattle warnings” about not
“stepping over that line” of self-commitment and self-manifestation. It is

806
the result of intense “keep them around the old homestead” programming.
(See the part(s) of the body affected for more information)

PINEAL GLAND PROBLEMS (Small “master gland” above the roof of

the mouth)

“God must be Al Capone!” They have severe issues around sacred-secular

interaction. It results in non-communicativeness and distrust. They have
little faith in the Universe, and they feel their only real defense is to keep
everyone guessing as to who they are, what they are experiencing, what
their situation is, and what they are up to. They systematically refuse to be
educated and enlightened.

They were subjected to highly invasive and untrustworthy parenting,

starting in the womb or early infancy. It resulted in an experience of the
“Home Office” (All that Is) as being inimical to their best interests, because
of the “in loco Deity” effect of early childhood, where they experienced the
parents as the “local reps” of the “Source.”

“PINK EYE” (See EYE PROBLEMS)

“PIN WORMS” (Rectal parasites)

“Repressed rebellion.” They are rather control-oriented and self-

suppressing, and they are afraid to “dump their stuff” on the world. Yet they
are also resentful of what feels like intrusively invasive restrictions and
interventions from their environment. Bottom line, they feel self-disgusted
and self-rejecting as being somehow “unclean.” It came about from a
restrictive, shame-inducing and boundary-violating family.

PITUITARY GLAND PROBLEMS (The “conductor gland” -- as in an

orchestra)

“It’s all their fault!” They are prone to be arrogantly egoistic and intensely
insulted by and unhappy with their lot in life. They are severely
disappointed and narcissistically wounded. They have the habit of
somaticizing and of claming ill health as the basis of much of their
dysfunctionality.

807
They feel they don’t have any control of themselves or of their situation.
They feel very unbalanced and out of control. They don’t feel they are the
master of their own ship and fate, and they have the belief that they are
forever experiencing bad luck and misfortune. They are highly negatively
focused, and they have real problems with seeing the things that are right
and good.

At the base of it is a severe self-distrust and worth-anxiety generated by

ignoring, insensitive, exploitative and/or oppressive parenting.

PLACENTA PROBLEMS

“What are you doing here!?” There is a rather intense at least ambivalence
about being pregnant, or about being pregnant with this particular child. It
can come from any number of causes, including situations, the soul nature
of the child, or personality problems in the mother.

If it is the mother’s personal characteristics issues, it arises from having

been given the same message at about the same time and probably
subsequently as a theme in her childhood.

***************************************

“Air supply problem.” The fetus feels cut off from the Universe -- rejected
by God. They assume they are getting their “Cosmic just desserts,” and this
conclusion carries into their life as the foundational assumption out of
which they operate. It is a destiny design feature for purposes of karma-
burning, experience-expanding and/or special training.

PLANTAR WARTS (Painful warts on the bottoms of the feet)

“Cope-ability-agitation.” They have deep competence-anxiety and lack of

confidence in themselves, and in the very basis of their understanding and
functioning. They feel that somehow their foundational equipment or
beingness is insufficient to the cause of living.

There is a spreading frustration about where the future seems to be going,

and they have little trust or faith in the Universe. There is also a good deal

808
of resentment and anger about all of this. It is the product of “keep ‘em
around the old homestead” independence-and effectance-undermining
parenting. (See FOOT PROBLEMS for information on the particular
area(s) of the bottom of the foot involved)

PLATELETS, LOW (Difficulty clotting blood)

“Over-responsibility.” They have a sense that they are here to make the
world all better, and that they should care-take everything and everyone. It
comes from having grown up in a situation of many unmet needs for
everyone, and they rose to the challenge to the point where they have some
difficulty limiting demands made on them or in taking care of their own
needs.

PLEURISY (Inflammation of the lung lining)

“Exploitation-rage.” There is a deep resentment of the inequality of energy

exchange and of the unrequitedness of their relationship with the
environment, but especially in their intimate relationships. They are prone
to rescuing and codependent situations out of an underlying sense of non-
deservingness of love and support.

They are now tending to put up an antagonistic and hostile wall around
themselves to avoid further such experiences. It is the result of an
exploitative and shame-inducing dysfunctional family. (See LUNG
PROBLEMS)

“P.M.S.” (Pre-Menstrual Syndrome); “P.M.T.” (Pre-Menstrual Tension)

“Self-suppression.” They are feeling powerless and that it is “unfeminine”

to be powerful in a patriarchal world. They therefore systematically
suppress their anger and personal potency. They hate to feel angry or upset
at anyone, and they are prone to give power to outside influences, resulting
in their allowing confusion to reign.

They reject the feminine process, while feeling that owning their potency
will result in utter rejection and invalidation. They can only vicariously
experience validation, significance and worth by assisting others to get it, at

809
their own expense. They feel somehow inferior, dysfunctional and
meaningless because of the monthly process of creativity-and generativity-
manifestation. There is a lack of self-appreciation and self-love.

What results out of all this is a tendency to become destabilized by

physiological changes. They also feel that their physiological condition
provides an excuse for rage-and despair-release. They were subjected to
intense patriarchal conditioning by both their family and the culture at large.
They need to take charge of their own life, and take joy in their potency and
worth.

PNEUMOCOCCUS (Airborne lethal lung disease)

“No right to exist.” They feel unworthy of living fully, and they are alone,
sad, and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance. They are suffocating
from a chronic self-disgust reaction, and they are full of angry punishment-
deservingness feelings with self-destructive motivations and manifestations.
They are capitulating and giving up, in an extreme underlying abandonment
depression around feeling rejected by God and ejected from the Cosmos.

It is the result of being massively neglected, rejected, accused and wrong-

made by a severely dysfunctional family, along with a highly self-
immersed, self-serving, and blame-throwing mother who gave them strong
“If it weren’t for you” messages, while simultaneously putting “You can do
no right” demands for them to “make it all better” for her.

PNEUMONIA (Inflammation of the lungs)

“Suppressed grief.” They are desperate and tired of life, due to generalized
disturbances in their processes and situation. They are having a “salt poured
in emotional wounds” experience that is not being allowed to heal.

They are suffering under the influence of their lifelong repressed sorrow.
They are also fearful and anxious to the point of being overcome with
desperation and futility feelings. They are struggling with confusion-
inducing emotional conflict, and there is a failure to maintain immunity to
negative ideas.

810
They are the product of a self-defeatingness generating dysfunctional
family who instilled a sense of their being hapless, helpless and hopeless.

***************************************

“My way or the highway!” They have a very strong ego that is getting in
their way. They tend to believe that theirs is the “only way to fly,” and that
they are surrounded by people who not only don’t understand that, but who
also place restrictions on them and who “punish” them for their ways of
doing things and their beingness.

They can’t let people in or themselves out. They also have the experience
that they have to handle the whole of life single-handed, with no help from
any friends. While this has made for a modicum of success as a survival
strategy, it has cut them off from joy and love, and that is now taking its
toll.

It came about from effective emotional abandonment at a very early age, to

which they reacted with becoming a “self-made person” with a “portable
Plexiglass phone-booth” around them.

***************************************

“Tie that grinds.” They are feeling totally stifled by an over-close and/or
dominating relationship. They are being overwhelmed and restricted, they
are very angry about it. However, they don’t feel they can do or say
anything about it, for fear of catastrophic consequences. It is the result of an
authoritarian and oppressive and possessive family.

POISONING

“Susceptible to destructive influences.” They are being subjected to external

domination, to which they are either surrendering in fear or violently
resisting. They are suffering from suggestibility to negative suggestions
from others. They are the product of their having been in an oppressive and
invasive family.

POISONED TO DEATH

811
“Snuffed out.” They were so crushed by the environment that they were
driven over the edge by it.

***************************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

POISON OAK; POISON IVY

“Don’t you dare!” They are feeling defenseless and open to attack, due to
being powerless in a hostile environment. They feel they don’t have either
the right or capability to be themselves. They are the product of restrictive
parenting that sought to “put a fence around” how much of themselves they
could manifest and develop. (See the area(s) affected for more information
also, see ECZEMA; PSORIASIS)

POLIO; POLIOMYELITIS (Paralysis of the body -- usually the limbs, but

it can go to the iron lung level)

“Life-and-death scarcity.” They have a very strong feeling of being “done

in” by some one, because there are not enough life sustenance resources to
go around. They feel they have to stop someone from getting any resources,
because it means that they won’t get theirs. They are paralyzed with
jealousy and feelings of life-and-death restrictions of freedom.

It comes from a family that engendered strong feelings of scarcity of life

support systems, and which engaged in competition to the death among the
family members. (See the parts of the body affected for more information)

POLYCYSTIC OVARIAN SYNDROME (PCOS) (Irregular periods, male

pattern baldness, depression, infertility, facial hair, acne, weight gain)

“Gender role issues.” She is at odds with her situation, function and identity
as a female in a patriarchal world. She feels victimized, and she has a

812
significant amount of “tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything
with three legs). She also feels considerably self-dissatisfied, particularly in
the realm of potency, personal power and position. She feels somehow
insufficient as a person by being female.

In addition, she tends to have an overdeveloped sense of being personally

responsible/accountable for the welfare of those around her by “delivering
the goods” and “covering all the bases.” She feels that she has to run the
whole show with inadequate personal resources and prerogatives. She feels
somehow cut off and alone in the world and, in effect, abandoned by God.

She was placed in a parental role in her family, where she was depended on
to be both the father and the mother of the family.

POLYPS (Cylindrical growths)

“Chained to the wall.” They are trapped in “ghosts of Christmases past”

emotionally, in the sense that things have not and will not change for them.
They are lost in the emotional pain of their childhood, and as a result, they
tend to re-create it in their current life. They are rigidly refusing to release
the past, and they are experiencing the impact of stagnating beliefs and
stationary strategies.

The net effect is a massively convincing experience that “life sucks,” “God
is Al Capone,” and you might as well “hunker down in the bunker,” because
it’s useless to expect any better out of things. The feeling is that the war is
definitely NOT over, and that nothing has substantially changed since they
developed their ways of being and doing things in their severely neglectful,
rejecting and dysfunctional family.

Unfortunately, that sets up a self-fulfilling prophecy effect that continuously

revalidates their assumptions and coping strategies of the past. They are
drowning in their own sorrow as a result. It is the result of a massively
invasive and pervasively accusatory and exploitative family who operated
out of extremely pessimistic and nihilistic beliefs and resulting events.

***************************************

813
“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They fear life, and they refuse to take it in
emotionally. They feel unsafe in the world, and that they don’t dare live
fully and freely. Their experience is that “love is a poison apple” that can’t
be trusted, and that they deserve no better than that, because of who and
what they are, bottom line.

They are the product of an untrustworthy and rejecting dysfunctional family

who were systematically undermining of their capacity to cope.

POST-CHILDBIRTH COMPLICATIONS

“No support.” They have intense ambivalence about being a parent, coupled
with a “developmental recapitulation” reaction, involving an experienced
replay of their own post-partum period, when there was little or no
necessary resources and commitment forthcoming from their environment.

“POST-NASAL DRIP” (Sinus infection)

“Dripping faucet.” There is an “inner crying,” along with a feeling of being

a powerless child victim of a cruel and uncaring world. They are
manifesting accountability-avoidant self-pity and a fixation on the
conviction they are the downtrodden object of discrimination, deprivation
and persecution.

It got started with an invasively suppressive, scapegoating, exploitative,

emotionally depriving, and ejecting-rejecting family, and it has become a
way of life, in a self-fulfilling prophecy manner.

RIGHT “POST-NASAL DRIP”

“Hobnail boot.” They have feelings of victimization and powerlessness.

LEFT “POST-NASAL DRIP”

“Vast wasteland.” There is long-standing grief and resignation around

emotional deprivation.

POST-PARTUM DEPRESSION (After giving birth)

814
“Running on empty.” They are having an exhaustion and abandonment-
despair reaction, which is a re-play of their own post-birth experience. They
were left to their own devices at that time, and often there was significant
maternal deprivation in their childhood.

PREGNANCY COMPLICATIONS

“Catastrophic expectations.” There are hidden worries, doubts, fears,

uncertainties and concerns that result in physical and emotional
complications. She is afraid of calamitous outcomes of the process. It
comes from familial (especially maternal) “rejection of parenthood and
pregnancy” messaging as a child.

CONSTIPATION IN PREGNANCY

“Hanging on.” They have a fear of letting go, and they are trying to hold on
to things as they were before this happened. They come from a highly
conservative and constrictive family.

ECLAMPSIA (Internal poisoning and possibly convulsions late in

pregnancy)

“Second thoughts.” They have an extreme ambivalence about or an out-

and-out rejection of this pregnancy. It is a profound refusal of motherhood,
arising from their own severely rejecting and abusive mothering, especially
during infancy. It may also involve a rageful rejection of this particular
individual as an additional aggravator.

HEARTBURN IN PREGNANCY

“Assimilation problems.” They are having difficulty in swallowing the

reality of what is happening. It is a total affront to their entire being, from
their point of view. Their family was very restricted in their range of
possibilities in life.

“PREGNANCY MASK” (Dark patches around their eyes caused by an

allergic reaction to their own estrogen and progesterone that leads to sun
sensitivity and melanin skin pigment production.)

815
“Black eyes.” They in effect violated and victimized by the pregnancy, and
they are resentful about that. They therefore tend to guilt-induce and blame-
throw about this and other matters.

This can either be situational or it can be representative of a generalized

attitude and approach. If it is the latter, it is the result of growing up in a
dysfunctional and/or patriarchal household in which they had to bite the
bullet and to just sit there and take it.

SCIATICA IN PREGNANCY

“What if...?” They are fearful of moving forward into new territory, and of
the direction that their life is going. They are the product of a fearful, harm-
avoidant and catastrophizing family.

TOXEMIA (High blood pressure, severe cramps, and intense nausea in

pregnancy)

“Conflicted feelings.” They have intense ambivalence about having a child

or about having this child. They are competence-anxious, situational
distressed, and/or motherhood-rejecting. It arises from a similar
ambivalence about their own arrival on the scene by their mother.

LATE TOXEMA (Cut-off of the blood flow through the placenta)

“Love-rejection.” They are experiencing a severe difficulty in the

expression and acceptance of love that has resulted in a desperate last-ditch
attempt to throttle off the life supply of the child, so as not to have to face
the problem of motherhood with this severe limitation. It is the result of
extreme rejection as a child, starting early in gestation.

VARICOSE VEINS IN PREGNANCY

“Engulfment-anxiety.” They have a lot of concern about sharing their love

with someone dependent on them, of losing their individuality, and/or of
becoming unlovable or unable to love. They are the product of a highly
enmeshed and independence-undermining family. (See the meanings of
other symptoms in pregnancy for further information)

816
PREMATURE BIRTH

“Enough, already!” The mother has taken as much of the pregnancy process
as she can stand, and she wants to terminate it ASAP. She was given an
“unwelcome wagon” reception in her own pregnancy, and she is therefore
unprepared to be able to accept the requirements of pregnancy.

***************************************

“Mother, PLEASE, I’d rather do it myself!” The intention of the soul of the
infant is to have an extremely self-sufficient and self-determining ego, and
this is a very good way to begin. The result is a pronounced “sealed unit
psychology” of the “island unto themselves” -- “self-made person” variety.

***************************************

“Can’t we get this over with!?” The infant has had it with the pregnancy
process, and they want to get on with their life. This can reflect a deeper
pattern of an intrauterine non-acceptance-caused self-containment and self-
determination that can fit in nicely with the process of generating a
“monad” (“island unto themselves”) personality pattern.

***************************************

“I’m outta here!” The intrauterine environment has been very painful and/or
restrictive and they want to escape the trauma. This dynamic portends a
particularly strong version of the super-self-sufficient “sealed unit”
psychology in the resulting individual, if not an actively exit-seeking
pattern. It is reflective of an intensely ambivalent or even out-and-out
rejecting attitude on the part of the mother about being pregnant, or about
being the mother of this particular individual.

PREMATURE DEVELOPMENT (Manifesting the physical, emotional,

mental and/or spiritual characteristics of adulthood sooner than the normal
developmental milestone process)

“SMOKIN’!” Their destiny design requires that they take on the

responsibilities and roles of their purpose as soon as possible, and so they

817
are maturing “like a Trans-Am coming out of the back of a van.”

***************************************

“Ready or not, here I come!” They are over-eager to be “grown up,” and
they seek to accelerate all aspects of achieving the adult role. Either they
were forced into excessive self-sufficiency and responsibility from an early
age, and/or they were severely sexualized in their formative process -- again
forcing an accelerated development for survival purposes.

PREMATURE EJACULATION PATTERN

“Performance-anxiety.” They are handicapped by sexual shame and guilt,

leading to an “I want to get this over as quickly as possible” feeling. This of
course becomes a worsening spiral, as their “performance problem”
compounds the situation with feelings of inadequacy, despair and self-
rejection.

It is the result of sex-ploitative and seductive-destructive mothering in

which she came onto him in a “tantalizing tarantula” manner, and then she
would violently emotionally attack him for being a male, and for
responding to her enticements and promises of a loving acceptance that was
never there.

PREMATURE MENOPAUSE

“Enough, already!” They are going into “early retirement.” They are
exhausted and/or fed up, and they want to “kick back,” and to not have to
handle “command generation” responsibilities.

This can be an “eternal girl” pattern in which they don’t want to be grown
up and/or a situation where they have had it with sexuality, generativity
and/or contributory responsibilities.

If it is an “eternal girl” pattern, it arose from a possessive/enmeshing

relationship with their mother. If it is a “fed up” response to responsibility,
it may reflect an “overloaded” pattern started by a severely demanding
family.

818
 ***************************************

“Right to MY life!” They want no more kids or no possibility of any kids in

their life. They are becoming totally focused on manifesting THEIR identity
and destiny from now on. They may or may not have been caught up in the
“eternal maternal” pattern, but they definitely do not intend it to be the
pattern of their life now. If they were caught up in the “eternal maternal
trip,” it was imposed extremely early in their life as a “God says so!”
requirement from their family.

***************************************

“Buzz off, buster!” They are thoroughly enraged with the paranoid
patriarchy, with the “tripods” of the world, and/or with sexuality and its
patterns. They are therefore shutting down sexually (which of course is not
at all involved in menopause normally). They have “had it up to the
eyebrows,” and it is “an up with which they will no longer put.”

This can either come from a lifetime of victimization and sex-ploitation

and/or from an underlying massive rage reaction to sexuality from early
sex-ploitation and abuse.

***************************************

“Checking out.” They are “winding down” and getting ready to leave. They
are tired, disgusted or self-rejecting. If they are tired of it all, it may arise
from having had to “shoulder the world” all their life, and they are like a
“worn-out horse.”

If it is a generalized revulsion reaction, it may reflect a severely cynical

and/or an abusive upbringing. If it is a self-elimination process, it would be
the result of intensely denigrating and/or accusatory parenting.

***************************************

“I’ve got WORK to do!” They are in effect ending their period of physical
generativity to make room for other forms of generativity (contributing to
tomorrow). They feel completed with the physical form of generativity

819
and/or they are not to do the child-rearing thing because their destiny calls
for other contributions now.

***************************************

“Femininity-rejection.” They feel the sexual/childbearing aspects of

themselves are not acceptable manifestations. They were subjected to
intensely patriarchal treatment as a child and later in their life, and they are
reacting with rageful refusal to play the game any more and/or with
revulsion towards the feminine.

“PRICKLY HEAT” (Fever-induced blisters -- usually in infancy)

“Alone in the world.” They feel unprotected and unsupported, and they are
quite resentful of that. There is a considerable amount of internal conflict
about need-seeking and self-expression. They feel that they have to dig in
their heels to prevent untoward outcomes of self-release.

It arises from a significantly dysfunctional family who is in effect riding

rough-shod over them when they let themselves and their needs be known.
This is reflective of an intensely ambivalent or even out-and-out rejecting
attitude on the part of the mother about being pregnant, or about being the
mother of this particular individual.

PROGERIA (Grossly premature aging -- they die with all the characteristic
appearances and limitations of an extremely advanced age person by the
age of 6 to 10.)

“Bring back the good old days!” They are incapable of adjusting to being
here on the material plane, and they are engaging in a severe rejection of
reality and the world. It is an extremely accelerated destiny manifestation,
as they only came to take care of some brief unfinished business of the soul.
Hence they very much do not feel a part of this world, and that there must
be some kind of Cosmic mistake at the basis of their being here at all. At
some deep level, they can hardly wait to get out of here.

PROGESTERONE PROBLEMS (Hormone that prepares the uterus for the

reception and development of the fertilized ovum)

820
“Inadequate to the cause.” They feel competence-anxious, ill-equipped,
unprepared and/or undeserving of generativity and fertility. They are afraid
that they have no right or capability to carry out childbearing and -rearing.
They also tend to feel insufficient to the requirements of meaningful service
and contribution. Their family denigrated and undermined their self-worth,
confidence and competence.

***************************************

“Generativity issues.” They are in conflict about or in opposition to building

tomorrow’s world -- including bearing and rearing children. They tend to be
focused or even fixated on personal gain and self-serving, perhaps at the
expense of contribution or service to the world. They are the product of a
similar family culture.

“PROJECTILE VOMITING” (It “fires out” of their mouth for some

distance)

“Projectile rejection.” They are engaged in a violent refusal of ideas and a

great fear of the new. To them, something new is something dreadful about
to happen. It just means more accountability and responsibility, along with
more trauma and pain.

They were forced into the “family hoist” position in their severely
dysfunctional family, and they constantly had to deal with everyone’s eyes
being psychologically focused on them in bitter accusation and vilification
whenever anything went wrong -- which was all the time.

***************************************

“Take this job and shove it!” They are utterly disgusted with and angry at
their whole life situation. They are finding their needs are not being met at
all, and that instead they are being subjected to totally unacceptable
treatment or experiences. It is an old familiar pattern that got started in their
significantly dysfunctional family.

***************************************

821
“I’ll MAKE you!” They are enraged and engaged in ferocious coercive
control of the “infantile tyrannosaurus” variety. It arises either from
“spaghetti spine” parenting or “well-guided missile” programming, where
they were being primed for being and/or utilized as the “hit person” for the
passive-aggressive or vengeance vendetta agendas of their family.

***************************************

“What am I DOING here!??” They are blown away by the fact they are
where they are and/or that they are here in body at all. Their experience is
they have been royally double-crossed by the Universe, and they are utterly
furious about it.

PROLAPSE (Displacement or protrusion of an organ, such as the vagina,

the prostate, the bladder, or the heart)

“Done in.” They are engaged in a collapsing, giving up or loss of control,

due to there no longer being sufficient energy to maintain their “elasticity.”
There is a mental prostration, devastation and deactivation.

There is an inner hopelessness, depression and sense of no longer having

control of their life. It is a reactivation of an old, familiar feeling, arising
from having grown up in a hapless and helpless position in their severely
dysfunctional family. (See the organ(s) involved for more information)

PROLAPSED HEART VALVE (Protruding into the heart chamber, leading

to back-logged blood, pain, skipped beats and shortness of breath)

“Undeserving.” They are struggling with feelings of unlovability, or with

the sense that love is never going to come to them. Their experience is that
they are somehow “flawed” and that they therefore cannot expect to receive
the acceptance and love they so desperately need and desire. It arises from
perfectionistic and paternalistic parenting in which nothing they ever did
was “good enough.”

PROSTATE PROBLEMS

822
“Male shame.” They are plagued with emotional tenseness and sexual
impotence, due to emotional conflicts about sexuality. They are self-
contained and lonely, with a lot of deprivation-grief and depression.

There is a significant amount of fatigue, along with a breaking down and/or

a certain giving up. They feel they just don’t cut it as a male, or that to be a
male is a shameful thing. It is the result of severe “tripod-rage” on their
mother’s part (the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs). Now it
is coming to roost in the symbolic center of masculine sexuality.

***************************************

“Can’t get it up.” There are mental fears that are weakening their
masculinity, along with a belief in the deteriorations of aging. There are felt
pressures to perform sexually.

They have guilt and concern over past carelessness and exploitativeness.
They “bought the whole nine yards” of the masculine projection and
manifestation in the patriarchal culture, and they are now feeling the cost.
The net effect is one of isolation, self-rejection and power-shame.

It came as a result of being thrust into the masculine role by their mother,
who wanted them to be the man in their life or at least a man she could be
proud of. They also modeled themselves after their patriarchal father.

PROLAPSED PROSTATE (Protruding into the bladder)

“Yesterday’s newspaper.” Due to changes in their life situation such as

divorce, aging or illness, there are intense feelings of frustration, impotence
and uselessness. They experience themselves as being ineffectual, confused
and unable to be a full man.

They are afraid that their purpose in being here is already over. They are
having great difficulty expressing or releasing these negative and corrosive
emotions. They grew up in a family who equated sexual performance and
“macho” masculinity with worth and meaningfulness as a male.

PROSTATE CANCER

823
“Powerlessness-fury.” They are full of repressed resentment at the way that
they have been restricted and disempowered in their life. They are prone to
turn their personal potency over to others, systems and situations. They are
the product of a castrating and “in-yoke”-ing enmeshed and possessive
mother.

PROSTRATION (Exhaustion and collapse)

“Burned out.” They are overwhelmed and unable to continue on any longer.
They have depleted all their resources, and there just isn’t any more steam
left. They are something of a workaholic or “serve-aholic,” who operates in
a “Me last!” manner. It is a pattern that started when they were made the
“family hoist” in their demanding, enmeshed, dysfunctional family.

PRURITIS (See ITCHING)

PSORIASIS (Scaly red patches on the skin)

“Unscratchable itch.” They feel a constant gnawing at them, a boring from

within, a continual nagging, irritation or annoyance. They want to achieve
something, but they just can’t get closure on it. They end up feeling that
they just have to settle for putting up with the incompleteness (of
themselves) in a resignation-apathy. They come from a family in which
they were continuously blocked from developing their personal power and
goals.

***************************************

“Self-numbing.” They are deadening their senses or their sense of self, out
of a fear of being hurt further. They refuse to accept responsibility for their
own feelings, but the reality is that they can never let themselves alone
about their frustrated ambitions.

They gnaw at themselves all the time, as they always strive after the next-
to-unattainable “brass ring” of approval and validation from their
unpleasable “parent in the head.” They are self-depriving and joy-avoidant
in a self-disapproving and worthless-feeling manner. It’s a self-
perfectionism arising from “Never good enough!” parenting.

824
 ***************************************

“Feeling-denying.” They are emotionally insecure in a feeling-avoidant and

accountability/responsibility-deflecting manner. They try to think and deny
their way through life, hoping that their underlying hurt and vulnerability
will not surface.

However, they are now experiencing just that, and they are quite disturbed
and agitated about that. They are the product of a denial-dominated, feeling-
suppressing and reality-avoidant dysfunctional family. (See the affected
area(s) for more information)

PSYCHOMOTOR EPISODES (“Non-present”/ “automatic pilot” episodes.

It is a form of seizure)

“Fear-freak-out.” They have a sense of persecution and pressure from the

environment, along with a feeling of great struggle. It is a rejecting of life
and violence towards the self.

There is a hidden fear amounting to severe “run amok-anxiety” -- an

agitated anticipation of a potential homicidal rampage from themselves.
The episodes are fear reactions and resentment-energy releases. There is an
extreme need to escape from the experiences of life, along with a great fear
of the expectations of society.

They have tremendous competence-anxiety and profound cope-ability-

anxiety. There is a pronounced sense of being outclassed and overwhelmed
by the world, along with a tremendous resentment of their situation.

It came from having too much expected of them, either for what they were
capable of or for a child. If the epilepsy appeared in childhood, it added to
the sense of their being incapable and “broken brained,” which only “fueled
the flames” of the situation. (See SEIZURES)

PTOMAINE POISONING (Poisoning by putrefied foods)

“Learned helplessness.” They are feeling defenseless, and that they have to
allow others to take control and run the situation. They are feeling that they

825
don’t have the right to protection, support or nurturance. They simply
expect to “eat shit” as a part of living. It is a pattern that arose in a family
where they had few, if any rights, and in which much anger and negativity
took place over which no one seemed to have any control. (See
POISONING)

PUBIC BONE PROBLEMS

“Genital protection.” They have fear of sexuality, shame over elimination,

and the feeling that they have no right to protect themselves against shame-
and guilt-inducing attacks.

They are blocking their creative, procreative, and propelling powers and
aspects of themselves. It was made crystal clear they were “bad, wrong and
evil” for having personal power and biologic functions. They were
subjected to severe wrong-making and oppressive suppression by their
patriarchal and judgmental family.

***************************************

“Tie that grinds.” They are preventing themselves from moving forward
and thrusting themselves into the fray, and they are afraid of life. They are
avoiding social, emotional and sexual connection. It was made very clear to
them they were not to manifest or develop themselves. They come from an
enmeshed family who would not allow them to do anything that smacked of
their growing away.

***************************************

“I don’t deserve.” There is self-alienation and rejection of their personhood.

They have retreated into their core, and they have a poor connection
between their inner being and their grounding to the world. They are out of
balance with themselves and the Universe, and they are afraid to stand on
their own or to manifest their individuality, independence and selfhood.

Their “root chakra” energies (those having to do with self-maintenance and

survival) are not flowing well, due to their damming up the energies
through insidious prudishness and habitual negativity of thought.

826
This all arises out of basic worth issues, survival-uncertainty and lovability-
questioning that started very early in life. They were in effect treated as a
commodity in their self-immersed and emotionally neglectful family.

***************************************

“Rejection-avoidance.” They are hobbled by resentment which impedes the

manifestation of their desires for themselves. They have a number of
unfulfilled ambitions, due to their being resistant to actualizing them.

They are suffering from deep-seated guilt for not having been more
aggressive in life, for letting others make decisions for them. They are
power-avoidant, out of an underlying abandonment-anxiety. They are the
product of an enmeshed and acceptance/rejection game-playing family who
undermined their personal potency. (See PELVIS PROBLEMS)

“PUFFINESS” (Body-wide water retention)

“Holding on.” They are not letting go of something or someone, and they
are resistant to changes. They are hanging on to the past for fear that if they
let go, something awful will happen. They are repressing, denying or
clutching to inner feelings and urges.

They feel emotionally trapped in the direction they are going in, and they
feel unable to emotionally assert themselves to bring any release. They feel
like they are carrying a heavy load on their shoulders, an overload of
responsibility. They want to share the load, but they are afraid to ask for
fear of alienating and losing what support they do have.

It’s a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern, in which they were held accountable

and responsible for the needs and situations of everyone and everything in
their family, while the only support they got came from their “unsung
hero(ine)” role in a serve-aholic situation.

***************************************

“Suppressed sorrow.” Water retention is in effect stored grief from their

whole situation and life history. It comes from a fear that any change will

827
result in the loss of even more in their life. They’d rather keep things as
they are than take a chance that they will end up with nothing, which is
what they fully expect is their “just desserts” for all the “failures” of their
“care-taking,” as represented by the negative events in their family’s
history.

***************************************

“Clutching clinging.” They have a great fear of losing something vital to

their survival and acceptability as a human being. They are intensely
abandonment-paranoid and approval-enslaved, and they are into severe self-
suppressing and pleasing-appeasing patterns as a rejection-deflection
strategy. They are also prone to highly possessive and jealous patterns in
their relationships.

It is the result of being placed on very conditional acceptance from very

early on. They had to earn their “love-line,” which of course “meant” that
“God said” that they don’t deserve love, -- they “earn” it by “selling out”
and hating themselves for it.

Section 16

828
829
P

399

830
831
P

400

401

402

403

832
404

405

406

407

408

409

410

411

412

833
413

414

415

416

417

418

419

420

834
421

422

423

424

425

426

427

428

835
QUADRIPLEGIC [Paralyzed in four limbs] (See PARALYSIS)

“QUINCY” (Inflammation of tonsils)

“Atonement-freak.” They have a strong belief that they can’t speak up for
themselves or ask for their needs. They believe that they don’t have the
right, and that they don’t deserve to have their needs met or to seek any
form of gratification. It is the result of an oppressive and shame-inducing
family.

Section 17

836
837
Q

429

838
839
Q

840
“RABBIT FEVER” (Fever, ache, inflamed lymph glands)

“Life sucks!” They are being consumed with resentment over threatened
abandonment. They have very negative feelings about themselves. They
feel they have no right to joy and love, and that “there’s no joy in
Bloodville.” Their current situation is re-instating the experiences they had
in their shame-inducing and rejecting dysfunctional family.

“RABIES”

“Immobilized by rage.” They are full of suppressed rage and festering

thoughts activated by their seething volcano-based desire to control
everything, along with a systematic refusal to express their feelings.

They don’t trust the process of life, and they are full of resentment
regarding what they regard as the absolute untrustworthiness of the world.
They are convinced that if they ever asked for what they wanted, it would
be deliberately withheld from them. They feel constantly betrayed, and they
are thoroughly enraged about it. Not only that, they feel that the information
would be used against them.

For the same reasons, they in effect can’t express their feelings, reactions
and interpretations. Their experience is it is dangerous to let the world know
where they are coming from and what’s happening with them. They may
even believe that violence is the answer to many of life’s situations. They
are trying to control their rage before they run amok with it.

It ends up in constant contractions of both the extensors and flexors,

concluding in immobilization and spasms. It is the result of coming from a
highly distrusting, untrustworthy, extortionistic and coercive control-
manifesting family. They are passing on what they learned at home.

RADIATION SICKNESS

“It’s not allowed!” Their experience is that any form of success and quality
of life is simply prohibited by the Universe. They feel continuously
thwarted by circumstances, and they have little or no self-confidence to

841
boot. They feel betrayed and victimized by life, and that they are
continuously devalued and disempowered. They come from a rejecting and
disempowering dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Running on empty.” They have a “but not for me” attitude about positive
things happening in their life. They feel that they have some sort of inherent
“moral cretinism” and/or set of limitations that prevent their having
anything meaningful or joyful in their life.

There is a considerable lack of harmony and internal conflict. As a result of

this, they are deeply resentful and agitated. Furthermore, there is an ever-
present fear of even more losses, and they have the profound fundamental
conviction that they don’t have the right to complain. Their family was
severely accusatory and blame-throwing in an accountability-avoidant and
abusive family.

*************************************

“Moral cretin.” They are full of unexpressed negative emotions, and they
have a major distrust of the Universe. Bottom line, they are convinced in
their core of being that they deserve no other, that they need punishment
and deprivation to “pay for their sins” and for their “evilness.”

They received a persona non grata treatment in which they were

consistently criticized, attacked, accused and denigrated, and in which they
received no support or respect. In the meantime, they were the “family
hoist” who held up the whole system in a “Cinderella/Cinderfella”
syndrome in their severely dysfunctional unreliable and unpredictable
family.

They were actually inherently quite superior to the rest of the family, which
led to unconscious extreme expectations of rescue and expectations, that no
one could meet, which resulted in unconscious embitterment by the rest of
the family members, who then took it out on them.

RAPE

842
“Powerhouse person.” They are a “mover-shaker” who had the effect of
challenging a “raging rapist” personality without having any such intention.

***********************************

“Pervasive pulchritude.” They are intensely attractive, as a function of who

they are, and they happen to have encountered a very damaged person.

***********************************

“Self-assault.” They are engaged in systematic “self-punishment” via self-

set ups arising out of an underlying sense they deserve nothing better.

There are a number of ways that “self-assault” can happen, such as:

“Kaleidoscopic unpredictability” emotional commotional functioning in

which she “blows hot and cold” in a highly enraging manner.

***********************************

“Atonement-freak” seeking to “balance the moral budget” by self-

punishment, out of the belief that they are “bad, wrong and evil” arising
from having been told so by their family.

***********************************

“Tissue games” by a slow self-destructor, who learned to use systematic

self-harm as the only way to get the attention they were so heavily denied.

***********************************

“Seductive-destructive”--“rapo-player” who learned early on that they were

“special” because of their sexual attractiveness, with the result they were
severely sex-ploitated by their parents. They became utterly enraged by all
this, and they take it out on whomever they can ensnare. This time it
backfired on them.

***********************************

843
“Crushed Coke can” product of an incredibly abusive and invasive family.

***********************************

“Rescue-tripping” learned helplessness and worth-anxiety generated by a

symbiotically dependent and dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“Shit happens.” A small percentage of events in the Universe are

determined by the “random generator” so as to constantly create situations
that are neither of our will nor of the Divine Design. This allows us to
continually have expansion-generating challenges. It should also be noted
in this context that “Shinola happens” too.

RASHES

“Roughed up.” They feel that they are being rubbed the wrong way. There
is a sense of being attacked, a fear of harm, and an abiding insecurity. They
are the product of a wrong-making yet sex-ploitative family, especially by
their mother.

***********************************

“Off with their heads!” There is a chronic irritation over delays of

gratification, along with a notable lack of patience. They have a pronounced
tendency to infantile attention-getting and “infantile tyrannosaurus” tactics.
They are simply unable to be cooperative or to go with the flow of life.

They were not allowed to differentiate and individuate as a child, and they
are still symbiotically attached to the “tie that grinds” with their mother,
mother-substitutes, and mother standins.

***********************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are plagued by embarrassment and

shame for who they are. There is considerable guilt about their feelings,
intentions, motivations, actions or thoughts. It is the result of having been

844
made to feel “bad, wrong and evil” for having wants, needs and desires as a
child. (See the affected area(s) for more information)

“RAT BITE FEVER” (Rash, fever, muscle pain)

“Just desserts.” They have been trying to “cut corners,” to “get to home
base” the “quick and dirty” way, and to intimidate with their irritation
reactions, and it has come time to “pay the piper.” They are intensely
enraged at this development, and they are very agitated at this turn of
events.

It is the result being cleverly capitulated to in a “keep ‘em around the old
homestead” -- “tie that grinds” dysfunctional family.

RAYNAUD’S DISEASE (Chronically cold extremities)

“Urban hermit.” They have a good deal of vulnerability-resentment and

reachability-avoidance. They are a contact-disliking people-avoider who is
reticent with strangers and a poor circulator who tends to agoraphobia (the
fear of going out of their home). They are rejection-paranoid, and they are
retreating into their core.

They feel rejected and not understood, and that any reaching out to touch
someone would result in rebuff or worse reactions. They feel like an “ugly
duckling” who elicits rejection everywhere they go. It all got started when
their parents punished and rejected them for being different and formidable,
because they were frightened by the individual’s potency.

*************************************

“Learned helplessness.” They feel cut off from understanding their life
circumstances or their direction. Their family was a confusion-inducing,
repressive and power-preventing dysfunctional system. The individual felt
no recourse, and, at the same time, they deeply resented the treatment they
were getting.

They want to hit or strangle someone as a result, and they want to take any
sort of hostile physical action against them. But they don’t want others to

845
know how they feel, so they get “cold feet.” Ultimately, they took it all to
heart, and they sadly settled into a resignation-apathy, as an overlay on their
intense desire to strike out.

RIGHT HAND COLDNESS

“Lying low.” They are avoiding contact with the world for fear of what it
would do to them.

LEFT HAND COLDNESS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have a deep fear of their own hostile impulses
and what they would do to the world.

RIGHT FOOT COLDNESS

“Forget it!” They do not want support from others or from the environment,
out of a deep distrust.

LEFT FOOT COLDNESS

“Environment-protecting.” They are systematically vulnerability-avoidance

and involvement-deflecting to prevent their engaging in mayhem, they fear.

COLD NOSE

“Power-avoidance.” They are afraid of their personal potency and its

potential consequences for them and for the ecology.

COLD EARS

“Awareness-avoidance.” They are avoiding tuning into what is really going

on in their life and in the world around them.

RECURRING ILLNESS (See FLUCTUATING ILLNESS)

RECTAL PROBLEMS

846
“Rammed up my ass.” They have deep feelings of vulnerability to
overwhelm, engulfment, intrusion, assault, penetration and humiliation, and
they are very fearful of sexuality. They also feel helpless and endangered in
some aspect of life. In addition, they are highly resistive to eliminating
negativity, toxins and traumas out of a fear of what would happen if they
“dumped their stuff.”

They have an intensely control-oriented and controlling approach, and they

have a lot of contained rage over perceived survival-threats. They are
severely self-suppressing, release-preventing and feeling-avoidant. Theirs
was a severely restrictive and boundary-violating family in a “butt-fucking”
manner.

ANORECTAL BLEEDING

“God is Al Capone!” They have a great deal of anger and frustration about
life. They are deeply distrusting of the Universe, due to a painfully paranoid
childhood household.

RECTAL ABSCESSES

“Don’t open that box!” They have a lot of anger in relation to what they
don’t want to release. They are greatly handicapped by fear of letting go,
due to anticipated loss of vital life supports. It was learned in a highly
oppressive and repressive household.

RECTAL BLEEDING

“God damn God!” There is much anger and frustration about life. They are
deeply distrusting of the Universe, due to a painfully paranoid household
formative experience.

RECTAL “BURNING”

“Fucked in the butt.” They feel “royally screwed” by an authority, system

or other negative father figure. It reflects a deep distrust of the Universe
generated by highly untrustworthy parenting.

847
RECTAL FISSURE; RECTAL FISTULA (Hole in the anus)

“Won’t let go.” They are manifesting the effects of incomplete releasing of
life’s trash, and of their holding on to the garbage of the past. It is the result
of a grudge-carrying, injustice-nurturing family.

RECTAL ITCHING

“I’m awful!” They are suffering from guilt and remorse over the past and a
refusal to forgive themselves. They came up in a highly uncompromising
and accusative household.

RECTAL PAIN

“Beat me.” They have a lot of guilt and felt need for punishment. They feel
they are “bad” and “not good enough,” probably arising from severely
harsh toilet training that reflected a heavy-handed Calvinistic childhood.

RECTOCELE (Prolapse in the rectal/vaginal wall)

“Anal-retentive.” They are caught up in perfectionistic standards and

applications, and they are intensely controlling and dominating in their
approach. They are rageful about being restricted, inhibited, boundary-
violated and wrong-made about their beingness, particularly around
sexuality.

They were severely dominated and monitored in their role-reversing and

perfectionistically expecting family.

REFERRED PAIN

“Attention-re-directing.” They are self-deluding and/or

accountability/responsibility-avoiding around the emotional pain activated
in the area affected by the issues involved. They have the habit of
deflecting, distorting and focusing attention away from the real cause of
their emotional pain onto other areas. This pattern got started in a denial-
dominated, awareness-deflecting and situation-distorting dysfunctional
family.

848
(To understand the issues involved, note the meanings of difficulties in the
area(s) where the pain is referred to, and also look to the meanings of the
problems in the area(s) where the pain should normally be expected to be.)

Some examples of the referred pain dynamics:

“Atonement-seeking.” They are engaged in guilt-based self-punishment.

They have a deep feeling of separation and “sinfulness” arising from
massive guilt-induction from their family for who they were, for what they
needed, for what they did, and for what went down in the family.

***********************************

“Victim-tripping.” They have a belief in bondage and victimization that was

generated in a severely dysfunctional and hostile family.

***********************************

“Get back to where you once belonged!” It is Nature’s way of warning that
they are off the path, leading to conflict and congestion as they work out an
undesirable condition. They have tried to “slip one past the Cosmos,” and
now have to “clean up their act,” and they have to “clean up the mess.” If
this is a chronic pattern, it is the result of constant “corner-cutting” by their
family as a lifestyle.

REFLEX SYMPATHETIC DYSTROPHY (Progressive nerve disorder that

in its final stages involves such extreme pain in the hands and feet due to
involuntary chronic clenching or cramping that suicide is a not uncommon
outcome.)

“Karmic payback.” They are engaged in severe guilt-based self-punishment

and atonement-seeking. They have deep feeling of separation and sinfulness
arising from massive feelings of evilness induced by their intensely
negatively-oriented family for being who they were, for what they needed,
for what they did, and for what went down in the family.

There is often an underlying vague awareness that they are in effect paying
intense karma for extreme abusiveness they exhibited in previous lives.

849
Their deep inner experience is that something is grossly cosmically out of
balance, and that it is a Universal requirement that they now “balance the
moral budget.”

***************************************

“Severe competence-anxiety.” It is a reflexive flight/freeze reaction set off

by trauma, often starting in the young. It is in effect, a massive fear of self-
release at the subconscious level -- the fear being based on an underlying
massive self-distrust and sense of inability to manifest what it takes to make
it without disastrous outcomes. It gets started intrauterine out of the
mother’s conscious or unconscious fear of having a deformed child.

***************************************

“Repressed rage.” They are sitting on a lot of fulminating fury that they are
afraid to express, act on or even know about. Their life is not working, and
they are very frustrated with that.

They come from a severely exploitative and suppressive patriarchal family

who made it crystal clear that to manifest personal power and anger is the
“kiss of death.”

HANDS

“Powerlessness feelings.” They have the experience of being unable to

effectively impact on the world around them or of refusal to do so.

LEGS AND FEET

“Destiny-resistance.” They have a fear of or refusal to move into the

manifestation of their life purpose.

REFLUX (Regurgitation followed by choking on food that went down the

wind pipe)

“I can’t keep up.” They feel utterly overwhelmed by life and their
circumstances, and they feel there is no way to meet the demands being

850
made of them or that there is no way to realize their destiny due to
circumstances beyond their control.

It is a re-appearance of an experience that once was the “warp and woof” of

their life, but it now has reached the point where they feel that they simply
don’t have what it takes to make it and/or that there is simply no point in
continuing. They are the product of a highly nihilistic and pessimistic
parenting pattern.

***********************************

“I should leave.” They are experiencing a resurgence of very early self-

rejection and existential guilt arising from intensely accusatory, wrong-
making and rejecting maternal parenting.

***********************************

“Time to exit, stage left.” They have the feeling that they have completed
what they can do here, and they feel that they have nothing more to do, so
they are leaving. It is a destiny completion reaction.

DEATH BY REFLUX

“Enough already!” They had reached the end of the road and/or the end of
their rope. They were either feeling completed or they were feeling
overwhelmed and unable to continue any more because it just didn’t work
and it hurt too much.

They were simultaneously relied on to be the “family hoist” and

continuously vilified, competence-undermined, and self-defeat-programmed
by their severely dysfunctional and possessive family.

****************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to

851
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

REGURGITATION (See VOMITING)

RELAPSING FEVER (Alternates with non-fever)

“Magical misery tour.” They are caught up in recurring resentment and

agitated anticipation. There is severe internal conflict and lack of harmony.
They have abandonment-paranoia, and self-induced worry and hurry. It
represents an experienced return to the uncertainties and frustrations of their
unpredictable dysfunctional family.

REPETITION OF BEHAVIORS; COMPULSIVE REDUNDANCY (“Pit

bull” behaviors)

“Behavioral tunnel.” They are trapped in a very narrow path in which only
an extremely narrow range of responses, undertakings, phenomena and/or
outcomes can be grasped. It is comparable to “perceptual myopia,” where
they can only focus on the most salient and immediate stimuli. It is the
result of a highly repressive, restrictive and rageful parenting pattern in
which there was “one and only one correct way to do things.”

Current circumstances such as brain changes, reduced capacity to function,

overwhelming changes or demands, or whatever have resulted in an
intensely threatening situation that so narrows their perspective and
repertoire that there has been a literal taking over of their functioning by
this childhood directive.

REPETITIVE INVOLUNTARY MOVEMENTS

“Who’s pulling their strings?” They were never really allowed to have a
will of their own. They were subjected to severe competence-and
confidence-undermining by their mother, who was either afraid of their
potency and/or afraid of losing them, and who also had a great deal of rage
elicited by their presence, demands or characteristics.

REPETITIVE MOTION DISORDER (Job-related- e.g., “computer wrist”)

852
“How much is too much?” They are experiencing an inner conflict between
their felt responsibility and need to be of service vs. their need for self-
commitment and enlightened self-interest. They don’t know how to
integrate altruistic concern and selfless service, on the one hand, with
personal need-meeting and self-advancement, on the other. They are not
able to carry on with a “What other people think of me is none of my
business!” attitude.

Instead, they are hyper-sensitive to criticism, and they crave recognition,

appreciation and response from the world around them. This situation
makes for considerable resentment, frustration and anger, and they are
therefore very irritable and quite alienated towards the daily responsibilities
they perform.

There is also a considerable amount of disappointment over the lack of

recognition for their performance. The net effect is that they grudgingly
carry out their responsibilities in an “unsung hero(ine)” manner, and they
quietly fervently wish their efforts were more appreciated.

This all arose from an exploitative and self-immersed dysfunctional family

who relied on them heavily, with little realization or recognition of their
life-necessity-supplying support.

***********************************

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They have difficulty in articulating and carrying out

their intentions, and they are concerned about their ability to move through
life with ease and skill. They are quite competence-anxious and lacking in
confidence. As a result, they are quite uptight and rather ungraceful in their
execution of things. It arises from “You can do no right!” messaging from a
rejecting and demanding family.

REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS

“Unfit for human consumption.” They feel that they were an unwanted
gender and/or they are rejecting of sexuality. They feel utterly unacceptable
and a “moral cretin.” There are many inner conflicts and confusions about

853
identity, worth, vulnerability and procreativity. They come from a non-
accepting and devaluing/denigrating family.

*************************************

“Involvement-incompetent.” They are afraid to share themselves intimately,

and they have great difficulties in communication, in their ability to trust, in
their capacity for considerateness and respectfulness, and in being at peace
with the other gender and with sexuality. They are having great difficulty in
sharing love and in being in committed relationships. They are the product
of an untrustworthy and unloving family.

*************************************

“Sexual shame.” They are suffering from guilt, worry, embarrassment,

shame, fear, insecurity, and resentment over their sexuality. They are
repressing and suppressing their sexuality, and they are frustrated in their
expression of their creativity. They have little capacity for joy, pleasure and
being vulnerable in the heart, and they lack forgiveness to themselves
around the whole area of sexuality.

Traumatic sexual experiences, primarily of a parental sex-ploitative and/or

gender-rejecting nature created it, and subsequent traumas in this area
compounded it. It is the result of the necessity to pay karma, due to an
imbalance in their inner soul in this area as a function of sexual abuses in
previous lives.

RIGHT REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS

“Competence concerns.” They have many conflicts concerning their manner

of manifestation of their sexuality.

LEFT REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS

“Worth concerns.” They have issues around their self-worth, their right to
exist, and their right to love, deriving from their being a sexual (and/or
sexualized) being. (See GENITAL PROBLEMS -- FEMALE; GENITAL
PROBLEMS -- MALE; OVARY PROBLEMS; PENIS PROBLEMS;

854
PROSTATE PROBLEMS; TESTICLE PROBLEMS; UTERUS
PROBLEMS; VAGINAL PROBLEMS; VULVA PROBLEMS)

RESPIRATORY ILLNESS (A lung disorder that is caused by an ancient

life form called a “microplasm”. It is older and more primitive than viruses
and bacteria, but they have a sort of “group mind” that makes them
unreachable to cure. All one can do is symptom-manage, which is done by
rubbing Vick’s Vaporub on the bottoms of your feet at night and by boiling
water with Vaporub and breathing it in with a towel over your head. A
heating pad over your lung area at night also alleviates it)

“Deprivation city.” They have difficulty taking in love or even life energy,
with an associated propensity to a lack of zest for living. They feel
somehow unworthy of living fully, and they tend to be sad, non-belonging
and alone.

They are finding themselves in an ungiving, stifling and smothering

situation and/or environment that is a re-play of the withholding and non-
accepting family and of the depriving, explorative and abusive
environments they keep encountering as a result.

*********************************

“Futile rescuing.” They are prone to abortive intervention in intractable

situations and repeated unrequited love relationships. They have a sensitive
mind, a generous nature and a strong sense of justice that often leads them
into blind alley and explorative situations and relationships.

They come from a dysfunctional family in which they held a parental role
that led to their forever trying to deflect their people from their self-
defeating patterns.

**********************************

“Self-suppression.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, unexpressed passions and strong emotions and desires. They
don’t have much sense of freedom of action, and they feel that they lack the
ability and/or the right express and communicate their feelings.

855
This was generated by a self-immersed and explorative family who were
shame-inducing, enmeshed and parasitic.

RESPIRATORY PROBLEMS

“I don’t deserve to exist.” They feel highly unsafe in the world, and they
fear taking in life fully. They feel unworthy of living fully, and they are
alone, sad and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance or approval.

They are joy-avoidant and happiness-squashing, out of an underlying fear

of the Universe. They are also love-starved and lonely. It is the result of
untrustworthy, depriving and/or self-immersed parenting.

RESPIRATORY FAILURE

They are now having an “Enough is enough!” reaction, and they are
“heading on out.” They are desperately tired of life, due to life-long
suppressed grief. They are fearful and anxious, and they are in effect too
devastated to take it any more.

It came about from effective emotional abandonment at a very early age, to

which they reacted with becoming a “self-made person” with a “portable
Plexiglas phone booth” around them. They can’t let people in or themselves
out. This has cut them off from joy and love, and it is now taking its toll.
(See BRONCHITIS; COLDS; EMPHYSEMA; FLU; TUBERCULOSIS;
WHOOPING COUGH)

“RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME” (1) (Severe to extreme and intensely

painful leg cramps necessitating long periods of walking that preclude any
sleep, thereby causing severe sleep deprivation reactions.)

“Survivalist dynamics.” They have a “bottom line” belief that they are all
they’ve got and that “One strike and I’m out!” They simply have to be in
complete control of everything that happens to and around them. It makes
them very anxious when they can’t have hands-on control of things. It
comes from being more or less left to their own devices from the beginning
in a rather intensely emotional unavailable and dysfunctional family.

856
“RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME” (2) Twitching feet-Repeated sudden
contractions of their feet and/or toes at night that creates an “electric feet”
feeling that prevents their being able to sleep and which requires that they
get up and jiggle their legs and/or stomp their feet until the energy subsides
– usually for an hour or more.)

“Resentment-rage.” They are experiencing an upsurge of their underlying

anger over current circumstances based upon either a recurrence of the type
of events and experiences that occurred in their early formative process that
generated their smoldering fury and/or a healing process in which their
longstanding rage over their self-defeating life pattern is finally being
worked through.

It arose from a systematic prevention of their ability to manifest themselves

and their needs in an oppressive and rejecting and programmed
incompetence-inducing dysfunctional family.

“RETCHING” (Intense regurgitation)

“Repulsion-expulsion.” They are engaged in unsuccessful attempts to rid

themselves of a situation. They are violently refusing to accept the current
developments, because to them it means something dreadful is about to
happen. It just means more responsibility, trauma and pain, and they have a
fear and disgust reaction to what is happening to them.

They feel that somehow it is their own fault that this situation exists, and
they are desperately trying to convince themselves it really isn’t happening.
But it isn’t working, and their misery compounds on itself.

Their family made them accountable and responsible for everything, and
they had to live with the “finger” of accusation every time something went
wrong, which was frequently, in their out of control dysfunctional family.
(See VOMITING)

RETINA PROBLEMS (See EYE PROBLEMS)

RETINITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE RETINA)

857
RETROGRADE AMNESIA (Loss of memory of immediately preceding
events)

“Hum a few bars and I’ll take it -- and get lost.” They are swallowed up in
the immediate stimulus situation, in a continuous “living in the moment”
pattern. They have lost or never acquired the ability to discern patterns,
sequences and meaning.

It is a result of having been required to not know what was happening to

them and around them in a dysfunctional, sex-ploitative and/or abusive
family. They are deathly afraid of the consequences of their knowing what
happens, for them and their “inner cosmos” (the “in loco Deity” experience
that the family were the “local reps of the Home Office” [All that Is]). Their
experience is that remembering would violate a “Divine injunction,” and it
possibly could result in “Deicide,” because of the terror the family had of
the individual’s knowing what was going down.

“RETRO-VIRUS” (H.I.V-like, it interacts with other diseases and bodily

locations)

“Running out of steam.” They have deep grief and a sense of underlying
despair and demoralization. It’s a “What’s the use?” attitude in the making
or the expression. They are overwhelmed by too much sorrow, and by the
“running on empty” effect of a severe inequality of energy exchange with
the world whereby they put out much more than they get.

It is a result of having “carried the world on their shoulders” all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family, with little or no ability to receive,
request or require a return in kind as the outcome. They were told in effect,
they were the source of all the family’s problems while actually being the
only one deflecting some of the disasters.

REYE’S SYNDROME (Severe endangerment or death of a child or infant,

due to giving them aspirin before age five. The dynamics refer to those of
the child, unless otherwise indicated.)

“This is as far as I go.” It is a soul decision based upon prior intentions, or

upon an assessment of the situation in terms of its relevance for the soul’s

858
needs.

***********************************

“Self-hatred.” Their parents are picking up and unconsciously acting on the

individual’s intense self-rejection. It is the result of hateful parenting that
the parents may or may not be aware of.

***********************************

“I don’t deserve to exist.” It reflects felt deservingness of non-support and

lack of love, to the point of feeling that they shouldn’t continue to live. It
arises from parenting that made them feel worthless.

***********************************

“Driven to distraction.” The parent(s) are under so much stress and tension
from current or on-going circumstances that they are not able to track at the
level that is required. It is a continuation of the process that went down in
their own dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“Shit happens.” It was one of the “random generator” events that make up a
small percentage of what happens whose purpose is to continuously
challenge through a means not of our making or the Divine design. It
should be noted here that “shinola happens” too.

RHEUMATIC FEVER (Bacterial allergic reaction that causes swelling in

the skin, joints and heart)

“I blew it!” They are fearful of lose of love, and they have abandonment-
annihilation-anxiety. There is deep grief, and a feeling of deserving this as
their “just desserts” from the “Home Office.” It is the result of parental
rejection, emotional deprivation, and/or separation threats during infancy
and childhood.

RHEUMATIC HEART (Swelling)

859
“Cut off.” They are having emotional conflict arising from considerable
annihilation-anxiety, often resulting in a submissive manner of being that
emulates a “martyr” or “victim tripping” approach. They have been
traumatized in such a manner as to lead to a shut down of their “heart
center.” There is a considerable agitation over their inability to love their
parents or family.

They are a sensitive soul who has been shocked by severe emotional
deprivation, separation-abandonment threats, and/or the loss or death of
loved ones. It is the result of lack of love from those who should have been
able to love them, or from a lack of love for someone who should be loved,
such as their parents.

RHEUMATISM (Inflammation and pain in the muscles and/or joints)

“They done me in!” They are feeling rejected for what they are, in the sense
of being totally unappreciated, and there is a lack of love in their life. They
are feeling very victimized and put upon, and they often find themselves
being pushed around by others. Underneath all this is a feeling of utter
powerlessness and a severe self-and other-rejection arising from their being
treated as the “intimate enemy” by their family.

***********************************

“Seething bitterness.” They are full of repressed resentment and anger and
they have a strongly suppressed desire to hit someone. They continuously
ruminate and recriminate over their “indignities,” and they cling to every
item like “super-glue.” They have a chronic bitterness and resentment,
leading to a desire for revenge. Their mind is wound up so tight in their
hostile preoccupations that it grinds their whole system to a halt. They come
from a suppressive and injustice-nurturing, grudge-holding family.

************************************

“Fixedly inflexible.” They are unbending in their expression and self-

manifestation. They have a rigid will and very strong opinions that they will
not and probably cannot change. They are prone to pushing others around,
and to imposing their way in an arbitrary and authoritarian manner. They

860
never let go of anything, as they try to be the “boss of the Universe” in an
effort to make life just the way they want it.

They have no trust of the “Home Office,” and they feel that “It is botching
the job.” They are forever sending out arrows of hatred, jealousy, general
discord and other negative vibrations. They are the product of an intensely
hostile home. (See the joints affected for more information)

RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS (Connective tissue in the joints attacked by

the immune system.)

“Massive self-rejection.” They have a deep self-dislike, shame and guilt.

They have an inbred sense of worthlessness and self-criticism. They are in
effect, attacking themselves. They are preventing movement and fluidity in
what they are doing and in the direction they are going. They are
unassertive and inhibited in their behavior, and they are self-sacrificing and
unable to express strong emotions. It is the result of continuous
condemnation and denigration as a child.

************************************

“Authority-freak.” They are operating out of a deep criticism of the powers

that be, along with a feeling of being very put-upon and exploited. They
have an abiding distrust of the Universe. It was generated by an oppressive
and patriarchal household. This all arises out of their soul’s refusal to
handle multi-life problems that have come up again.

************************************

“Hapless, helpless, hopeless.” They feel utterly overwhelmed by the

world’s requirements. There is no sense of an out route or of an ability to
make a difference in their situation. It comes from having been the “pivot
person” in their severely and intractably dysfunctional family. (See the
particular joints affected for more information also, see ARTHRITIS)

RIB PROBLEMS; RIB CAGE PROBLEMS

861
“Vulnerability-anxiety.” They are feeling unprotected, fragile, and open to
attack. They have a deep sense of insecurity, of a lack of control over their
life, and of helpless exposure, with a profound sense of vulnerability at a
core level. There is deprivation-expectation and separation-and
abandonment-anxiety. They feel they will ultimately end up alone in cold
water flat or on “skid row.”

It arises from a self-immersed and possessive parenting pattern in which

they were subjected to lack of consideration of their needs, threats of
abandonment, demands that they conform totally to the parent(s)
expectations and systematic subconscious, subterranean and subtle
programming to never succeed in the world or in relationships. There was
also the injunction that went, “If we can’t have you, then you will end up
alone, alienated, and totally deprived.”

RIGHT RIBS

“Down and out.” They have fears or manifestations of self-sabotage and

“Skid Row”-seeking.

LEFT RIBS

“Moral cretin.” There is significant self-rejection and the feeling that they
somehow deserve to end up on “Skid Row.” (See PAIN IN THE RIBS)

RICKETS (Softening and bending of the bones, due to lack of Vitamin D)

“Falling apart.” They are disintegrating under the load of responsibilities

they have had to carry all their life. They just can’t support themselves and
their world single-handedly like they have been doing all along any more.

They suffered from emotional malnutrition and a lack of love and security
in childhood. They arrived at the conclusion that it is all they deserve and
can expect from the Universe. As a result, they have consistently been
involved in repetitions of the home situation.

RIGHT/LEFT SPLIT IN THEIR BODY

862
“Polarized functioning.” They are notably lacking in integration and
balance of their manifestation. They emphasize one side over the other to a
degree that is functionally detrimental to their welfare. They come from a
highly patriarchal and domineering family in which role specialization is
heavily emphasized.

RIGHT SIDE OVER-EMPHASIS

“Yang-banging.” They are hyper-masculinized in their manifestation, with

an exaggeration of their protective, impact-making, releasing, taking and
fighting aspects.

LEFT SIDE OVER-EMPHASIS

“Yin-dominated.” They tend to be over-giving, over-nurturing and over-

responsible -- at their own expense. They are excessively receptive and
reactive, and they tend to suppress their personal potency.

RIGHT SIDE OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“Yang problems.” They have difficulties in accepting and manifesting their

generative force and their masculine logic, assertion, aggression, intellect,
rationality and authority. They are having a hard time in the realm of daily
reality, practical and work issues. They are inhibited and conflicted about
making an impact and initiating action and situations.

They have deep ambivalence and emotional issues around the expression of
independence, potency and competence. As a result, they are giving out and
letting go, in a power-avoidant and self-suppressing manner. It reflects the
influences of the father and other male authorities in a patriarchal world.

In males, it represents a male-shame reaction that reflects their mother’s

“tripod-rage” (the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs) and
their rejection of their father and other male authorities as models.

In females, it reflects the impact of her father(s) and other formative males
regarding her felt right to manifest her potency and competence, as well as

863
regarding her manifestation of feminine grace, nurture, allure and
generativity.

RINGING IN THE EARS (Mild)

“Voices in the head.” They are experiencing a low background “noise” of

admonitions, evaluations and injunctions from “Christmases past” telling
them that what they are doing/being/having isn’t right or the right thing for
them.

It indicates that they are “breaking script” or “breaking new ground” in

their life. They are the product of a rather possessive, demanding or
dysfunctionally dependent family who were very tightly monitoring and
controlling of their functioning. They are now leaving all of that behind.

RIGHT EAR RINGING

“What will the neighbors think?” They are getting “flash-backs” of

concerns from the family about how things might affect their social
acceptability.

LEFT EAR RINGING

“You better watch out!” They are re-experiencing numerous warnings about
being “the death of themselves” if they’re not “careful” (e.g., not
conforming to the family’s programs). (See TINNITUS)

“RINGWORM” (Contagious fungus-based skin eruptions of a circular

shape)

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They are allowing others to “get under their skin.”

They have a sense of powerlessness to deflect disaster and to handle the
world. They have no sense that things will get any better for them. They are
self-denigrating, and they don’t feel good enough or clean enough. It is the
result of intense oppression and shame-induction by their family. (See the
affected area(s) for more information)

RITTER’S DISEASE (Severe skin inflammation in infants)

864
“Freaked out.” They are suffering from intense implication-anxiety and
ramification-rage. The experience is of being beset on all sides by
inexorable and continuously irritating and threatening forces. They have a
notable lack of peace and harmony in their lives, and they feel very uneasy
and frightened by the world. To make matters worse, they have strong
longings that can’t be realized at present.

They take it all personally, of course, as if they were the cause of it all.
They are already ashamed of themselves, and they feel somehow
“monstrous.” They have been so misunderstood and ill-treated from the
beginning that they have had to withdraw into their core.

It arises from their being a “sensitive” in a denial-dominated dysfunctional

family. They feel like an “alarming Martian.” It is a result of a hostile
atmosphere in their environment, starting in the womb.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN SPOTTED FEVER (Red eruptions, fever, pains in

the bones and muscles)

“Rejection-resentment.” They feel besieged and restricted on all sides. They

feel unsafe, betrayed, rejected and attacked. They have concluded they can’t
be themselves because that is “wrong, bad and evil.” At the same time, they
are burning up with intense anger and stored resentments about how they
are treated. They are also intensely abandonment-anxious and self-disgusted
for eliciting this reaction. It is the result of a self-immersed, convenience-
concerned, wrong-making and suppressive family.

ROSACEA (Red and rough blotches on the cheeks, nose and lower face --
much more common in males)

“Stressed out.” They are feeling the effects of overload and chronic
deprivation in their life, due to excessive responsibilities and demands
and/or to self-imposed stresses resulting from their over-responsible “serve-
aholic” lifestyle. They were placed in a position of extremely excessive
responsibility in their dependent and dysfunctional family.

***************************************

865
“Coals from the fire.” It is reflective of a process of insisting on taking coals
from the fire of their disorder. They are engaged in a systematically
dissipative or self-destructive lifestyle (such as alcoholism). It is a pattern
that got started early on in a significantly dysfunctional family, in which
they were forced to participate and/or serve as the “sane one” for the family
-- to the point where they were programmed to slowly self-destruct.

ROTATOR CUFF TENDONITIS (A tearing and swelling of the muscles

and tendons that hold the upper area in the shoulder joint)

“Over-responsibility strains.” They are taking on too much in the way of

taking care of the world. They feel victimized and overwhelmed, and there
is an experience of non-support. It has resulted in their going over the edge
of what can be handled and tolerated. They were the “family hoist” in a
rather severely dysfunctional family.

RUBELLA (German measles)

“They don’t like me.” They feel excluded and picked on by their intimate
circle. They feel misunderstood and unappreciated. It is a reaction to being
regarded as something of an irritant or problem by their family.

RUMINATION DISORDER OF INFANCY (Repeated regurgitation and re-

swallowing their food)

“Nobody there.” There is intense maternal emotional unavailability (though

she may be physically ministering to the child). It is a super-self-sustaining
activity and a refusal to rely on anyone for anything.

“RUNNY NOSE”

“Inner crying.” There is an underlying sorrow that is in effect asking for

help and love. They have a sense of intense dissatisfaction and helplessness
about their situation. They feel that their life is unpredictable,
uncontrollable and overwhelming, and they are in effect running away from
their responsibilities. Underlying all is a suppressed despair over
deprivation that occurred in childhood, and which is reoccurring now. (See
COLDS)

866
RUPTURE (Tearing apart of muscle wall, leading to a hernia -- a
protruding organ)

“Overwhelm-anxiety.” They feel that they are completely in over their head,
and that they don’t have what it takes to handle the requirements of their
present situation. The result is an over-responsible, self-blaming,
competence-anxious “serve-aholic” who is constantly feeling they can’t
deliver the goods.

They are the product of an exploitative and competence-undermining

family who simultaneously depended on them and blamed them for all that
went wrong. Meanwhile at the same time they were programming them to
be a failure in the world so they could “keep them around the old
homestead.” They are now being told that they need to stop, look and re-
choose on how much they take on, how they evaluate their capabilities, and
how they scare themselves.

***************************************

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are a powder keg of rage about to go off, with a
frantic effort to control their anger. They do so by pretending it isn’t there,
in an ostrich-like manner, which only generates events and outcomes that
feed the volcano inside. They feel that life is “so pressing,” and they try to
ignore it all, resulting in self-violence and self-injury.

They are super self-suppressing and maniacally controlling of the

environment. They try to pin everything down -- especially themselves -- in
a “Lilliputian -like million little ropes” pattern. They end up rupturing all
their relationships, as they struggle under the strain of enormous burdens, as
they experience it.

Much of what they do is incorrect manifestation of creative expression in

trying to hands on pin everything down. They have a considerable amount
of self-distrust arising from an extremely punitive and controlling
upbringing. In effect, they are doing unto others what was done unto them.
(See the body area(s) affected for more information)

867
RUPTURED DISC (Torn-apart plate-like structure between the spinal
vertebrae)

“Cop-out artist.” They engage in chronic problem-avoidance, as they try to

“put it behind them.” It is an “ostrich approach” they learned in their denial-
dominated and accountability responsibility-ducking dysfunctional family.
(See SPINAL DISC PROBLEMS for what it means to have the particular
disc(s) involved rupture)

Section 18

868
R

869
430

870
871
R

431

432

433

434

435

436

437

438

872
439

440

441

442

443

444

445

446

873
SACROILIAC PROBLEMS (Juncture of the hip bone and the lower spine)

“At effect.” They are feeling very much that they are not “at cause” in their
life. They have a pronounced fear of seductive-destructiveness and the
abuse of power from those around them. They are severely conflicted and
suppressed with regard to sexuality. They also feel they or others will
misuse power, particularly that of sexuality. They feel poorly integrated
with the world around them, as if they are in the wrong place, and they feel
at risk.

They don’t know which way to turn, and they end up not turning anywhere,
in a kind of multi-directional thwartedness reaction. They are the product of
“seduce-slap” and self-immersed domineering from their mother.

RIGHT SACROILIAC

“In over their head.” There is uncertainty as to how to proceed and how to
handle the world on its terms. They feel like a child in an adult role, like in
the movie “Big.”

LEFT SACROILIAC

“Self-shame.” They have self-distrust and confusion as to how to deal with

their feelings, desires and intentions. They feel guilty for their personal
potency, and they are ashamed of their sexuality.

SALIVARY GLAND PROBLEMS

“Does not compute.” They are having difficulty in assimilating new

experiences and ideas. They also have trouble breaking things down into
“bite size pieces” so as to commence comprehension.

They are having a bad case of “mental constipation” and “blocked flow” of
functioning. They tend to live in the past, and to shunt off evolutionary
processes. It is the result of their having come up in a denial-dominated
dysfunctional family who “played ostrich” a lot.

874
SALMONELLA (Bacterial disorder causing dehydration, diarrhea, nausea,
headache, and other symptoms to a severe and potentially lethal degree.)

“Feeling overwhelmed.” They are under a lot of stress, and they are feeling
quite tense about it. Their fear and anxiety are alarming them to the point of
threatening to upset their whole apple cart. They are having strong
experiences of internal pressures rising to the point of getting out of control.
There is an intense need for them to be able to get on top of their situation
so they can problem-solve and issue-resolve.

***********************************

“Here it comes!” They are faced with a heavy and meaningful task, they
wish it were over and done with. Something important is pending, and they
don’t want to go through with it. They have a fair amount of competence-
anxiety and built-in programming against success and intimacy.

They were supposed to stick around the old homestead and take care of
their parents. Any move towards independence, self-empowerment, and
significant involvement/contribution/commitment activates annihilation-
anxiety and betrayal-guilt. The current situation is just such a requirement
and issue for them.

***********************************

“What a revolting development THIS is!” They are having a fear and
disgust reaction to what is happening to them. They are totally rejecting an
idea or experience -- they don’t want to have anything to do with it. They
want to throw it right back out again. They feel that something wrong or
immoral is happening.

They are inundated with disgust with the situation and themselves, and they
are full of fear of the consequences of what’s going down. They feel that
something dreadful has happened, and they feel responsible for it. They
wish it hadn’t happened, and they are truly sorry it has occurred. They
deeply wish they hadn’t “done it.” They want things to return to the way
they were before this happened. They are full of upset, pain and sadness;
they don’t want the situation anywhere near them.

875
They desperately want to undo the past, and they are afraid of the effects of
this on their future. They are full of dissatisfaction, disgust and regret over
the way things are. They are saying to themselves over and over, “I should
have...” They feel personally accountable for everything that happens,
particularly the negative outcomes.

Their family held them accountable and responsible for all that took place,
and all eyes turned in their direction when anything went wrong -- which
was frequently. They were made very aware they had no right to commit to
anyone or anything else but the continued maintenance of the family. They
therefore have great guilt about sexuality, success, and intimacy, as if these
were “evil deeds.”

***************************************

“Left high and dry.” They experience life as one long threat. They feel that
something disastrous is imminent, and that they are like a fish out of water,
in that they feel they don’t have what it takes to handle it.

It has been this way all their life, starting in their unpredictably destructive
family in which there was much subterranean, subconscious and subtle
subterfuge and sabotage going down. No one saw or knew what was
happening, just that they couldn’t tell when the next piece of traumatic
excrement was going to come off the fan. At any moment, something awful
could happen, and they have to be on constant at least “yellow alert.”

***************************************

“Over-run.” They are feeling defenseless and like they have to allow others
to take control and run the situation. It is a “learned helplessness” that leads
them to feel that they don’t have the right to protection, support or
nurturance. They simply expect to “eat shit” as a part of living.

It is a pattern that arose in a family where they had few, if any rights, and in
which much anger and negativity took place, over which no one seemed to
have any control.

SARCOIDOSIS (See IMMUNE SYSTEM PROBLEMS)

876
S.A.R.S (Sudden Acute Respiratory Syndrome)

“Urban Hermit.” There is an insufficient involvement and interaction with

the world, in a kind of “among us but not of us” pattern. Underneath is a
buried rage and resentment about being so alone, alien and alienated.

It comes from growing up in a family in which they could do no right, as

the unrecognized and unacknowledged “family hoist” upon whom everyone
depended and whom no one supported, sustained or validated.

***************************************

“Self-suppression.” They are full of family taboos, social restrictions, moral

inhibitions, unexpressed passions, strong desires and unexpressed intense
emotions. They don’t have any sense of freedom or the right or ability to
communicate their feelings. This was generated by a self-immersed and
dysfunctional family who were exploitative, shame-inducting and
enmeshed.

***************************************

“Barking up the wrong tree.” They tend to get into consuming passionate
commitments that lead nowhere, and to get into repeated disturbing
unrequited love situations. They have a sensitive mind and a very strong
sense of justice, righteousness and generosity that frequently leads them
into blind alleys and exploitative situations and relationships.

They are feeling that they are always in “tie that grinds” relationships in
which they feel totally stifled by over-close and/or dominating partners.
They are being overwhelmed and restricted, and they are very angry about
it. They don’t feel that they can do or say anything about it, for fear of
catastrophic consequences.

They come from an authoritarian, oppressive and possessive dysfunctional

family in which they held a reversed parental role that led to their
repeatedly trying to rescue their family from their self-defeating patterns.

***************************************

877
“Suppressed grief.” They are desperate and tired of life, due to generalized
disturbances in their processes and situation. They are having a “salt poured
in emotional wounds” experience that they are not being allowed to heal.
They are suffering under the influence of their lifelong suppressed sorrow.

They are fearful and anxious to the point of being overcome with
desperation and futility feelings. They are struggling with confusion-
inducing emotional conflict, and there is a failure to maintain immunity to
negative ideas.

They are the product of a self-defeatingness generating dysfunctional

family who instilled a sense of being hapless, helpless and hopeless.

***************************************

“Deprivation City.” They have a real difficulty in taking in prana, chi, ki,
élan vitale, love or life energy, as a function of their prideful brutalizing
misuse of energy in past lives. They have an inability to renew to the breath
of life, along with a lack of enthusiasm and zeal for living. They have a real
inability to take in life, and they don’t feel worthy of living life fully. They
are suffering from depression and chronic grief, because they are deeply
afraid of taking in life energy.

They lack cosmic, community and conjugal contact. They are alone, sad
and non-belonging, with no sense of acceptance or approval. They feel
constantly in smothering and stifling environments, with a resulting sense
that life is dull and monotonous. They are the product of a severely
withholding and rejecting family.

***************************************

“My way or the highway!” They have a very strong ego that is getting in
their way. They tend to believe that theirs is the “only way to fly,” and that
they are surrounded by people who not only don’t understand that, but who
also place restrictions on them and who “unfairly punish” them for their
ways of beingness and of doing things.

878
They feel that they have to handle the whole of life single-handed, with no
help from any so-called friends. While this has made for a modicum of
success as a survival strategy, it has cut them off from joy and love, and
they can’t let people in or themselves out to merge, and that is now taking
its toll.

It all got started in a severely self-immersed and functionally neglectful

dysfunctional family who paid little attention to their needs.

***************************************

“Bitter resentfulness.” They are wasting away due to selfishness, intense

possessiveness, cruel thoughts and vengefulness. They feel that they have
done their level best in a valiant effort, but that circumstances just wouldn’t
have it so.

They have had unhappy love affairs, resulting in disappointment, disgust

unforgiveness and clutchingness. They feel unappreciated, and they play
out a “Camille” scenario, in which their feeling is, “They’ll be sorry when
I’m gone!” They are given to resentfully imagined guilt and remorse
reactions from their people.

In addition, there is also a large spiteful revenge streak playing a major part
in this process. They are selfishly clinging and controlling, they are slyly
passive-aggressive, and they are full of “Feel sorry for me!” strategies. In
the meantime, they are seeking and “easeful death.”

It is the result of their having a “special” role as a child in their severely

passive-aggressive dysfunctional family, and they have never gotten over or
wanted to relinquish it.

***************************************

“No right to exist.” They feel unworthy of living, and they are suffocating
from a chronic self-disgust reaction. They are full of angry punishment-
deservingness feelings, with accompanying self-destructive motivations and
manifestations. They are capitulating and giving up, in an extreme

879
underlying abandonment depression around feeling rejected by God and of
being ejected from the Cosmos.

It is the result of being massively neglected, rejected, accused and made

wrong by a severely judgmental dysfunctional family. There was a highly
self-immersed, self-serving and blame-throwing mother who gave them
strong “If it weren’t for you!” messages. She simultaneously put “you can
do no right!” accusations out continuously, along with expecting them to
“make it all better” -- an utter impossibility.

They are now having an “Enough is enough!” reaction, and they are
“heading on out.” They are desperately tired of life, due to lifelong severe,
suppressed grief and emotional deprivation. They are fearful and anxious,
and they are in effect, too devastated to take it any more. It came from
effective emotional abandonment at an early age, to which they reacted by
becoming a “self-made person” with a “portable Plexiglas phone booth”
around them. So they are leaving now.

SCABIES (See SKIN MITES in SKIN PROBLEMS)

SCABS (Due to scratching or other irritations and abrasions)

“Shameful love-starvation.” They are deeply troubled by intimacy-inability,

and by a sense of being “evil” for having wants, needs and desires. There is
a considerable amount of sexual guilt. As a result, they are prone to
“punish” themselves with “scratch attacks” or other self-abrasive behaviors.
It is the result of a sex-ploitative and shame-inducing parenting.

SCALP PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They have worries and preoccupations about the correctness

of their interpretations and intentions. They are struggling with self-doubt
and self-distrust generated by a wrong-making and confidence-undermining
family.

SCARLET FEVER (Chills, high fever, sore throat and skin rash)

880
“Cinderella/Cinderfella.” They have a resentful fearfulness about feeling
attacked and rejected. They feel they are unappreciated and wrongly
accused. They were regarded as the source and cause of everything that
happened in the family at the subconscious level, resulting in their being
constantly blamed for everything that went wrong.

SCIATICA (Nerve pains in the hips and thighs, due to prolapsed disc or to a
“pinched nerve” in the lower spine)

“I don’ wanna know!” The direction they are going is causing deep inner
pain, which they don’t want to feel, so they seek to ignore it. They are
avoiding knowing what is really going on and what they are really
experiencing. They come from a denial-dominated self-defeat programming
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Naive.” They are being gullible and insufficiently critical in their judgment
calls. They are over-accepting and suggestible, and they have a fear of
money and of the future. They are being kept “forever young” and
incapable of self-sufficiency and identity/destiny-manifestation by the
parents in a “keep ‘em around the old homestead” possessive abusiveness
pattern.

*************************************

“Tie that grinds.” They have sexual conflicts and a parent-fixation, due to a
sex-ploitative and accountability-attributing treatment from their family.

*************************************

“Mother, please, I’d rather do it myself!” They are intensely self-

determining, and they are an “island unto one’s self” who is super-self-
sufficient. They are greatly concerned and agitated about money, security
and safety issues.

Underneath all their ferocious independence is an “innocent infant” longing

for care and commitment. As a result, they do a “first roar of disapproval”

881
pattern whereby they intensely reject suggestions, and then come around
later. This got started in early infancy in reaction to “Child, please, I’d
rather you did it yourself!” parenting.

*************************************

“Creativity-anxiety.” They have a great deal of concern, anxiety and dread

regarding the release and expression of their creative capabilities. They are
of two minds -- one conservative and conforming, and the other creative
and individualistic. They are the product of an achievement-oriented family
who both admired and disapproved of their creative nature.

*************************************

“Hypocritical.” They operate in a two-faced manner, putting out what

seems to be desired while harboring very different orientations,
experiences, interpretations and evaluations inside. They learned it in their
highly status-conscious and selfishly ambitious family.

SCLEROSIS (Inflammation and hardening of connective tissue)

“Self-rage.” They are attacking themselves at a very deep and essential

level, out of an intense anger. They have a long-repressed fury or rage that
is coming to the surface, along with a case of “hardening of the attitudes”
and beliefs. They are only seeing parts of themselves, not the entire picture,
and they are fragmenting as a result. They are full of self-dislike, guilt,
shame and inner unhappiness.

It arises out of a profound self-hatred promulgated in their envious,

dysfunctional, authoritarian and possessive household.

SCOLIOSIS (Sideways curvature of the spine)

“Maturation-deflection.” They have a core conflict about being here,

especially concerning “growing up.” They have an inability to flow with the
support available in life. They are fearfully trying to hold onto old ideas.

882
They don’t trust life, and because of that, they feel deeply at risk. That, in
turn, leads to a certain lack of integrity, and to little courage of their
convictions, because of the potential consequences of alienating. They are
consequently carrying the burden of life single-handedly with a helpless
and hopeless feeling.

It reflects having had an overload of responsibility for themselves from a

very early age. It is also a result of their having been forced to capitulate,
and to bend to the will of a severely domineering parent in childhood.

This may or may not result in a tendency to buckle under pressure from
authority now. Indeed, there may even be a strong rebellious pattern
operating, if one of the parents tended to undermine the oppressiveness of
the other. In all cases, they bear the intense scars of the extremely
oppressive pressure of their childhood.

CURVATURE TO THE RIGHT

“Serve-aholic.” They have always had to carry an excessive load of

responsibility for the state and needs of their environment.

CURVATURE TO THE LEFT

“Alone on their own.” They had to take care of their own needs from the
very beginning, and their experience is that there is no one there for them.

SCRATCHES

“Briar patch psychology.” They feel life is tearing at them, that life is a “rip-
off,” and they are being “ripped up.” There is a sense of an unequal
exchange of energy of an exploitative nature. It arises from just such an
experience in childhood. (See the areas affected for more information)

SCRATCHING (Intensely and/or compulsively)

“Self-gauging.” They are engaged in guilty self-attacking, arising out of

confused ideas and out of feeling dirty about sexual feelings. It is a form of
ambivalent self-soothing, in that they are resentful of the need for stroking,

883
while simultaneously at having to do it themselves. They are also engaged
in ham-stringing, self-undermining success-avoidance and self-punishment.

This was all generated by a seductive-destructive parent who was

possessive and shame-inducingly blame-throwing and accusative, while
simultaneously sex-ploitating and smothering them. They ended up
believing all of it, and they have “taken over the helm” from the parent.
They are now doing it to themselves.

SCROTUM PROBLEMS

“Male shame.” They are suffering from sexual guilt and masculinity-
rejection. He was made to feel “unfit for human consumption” by a “tripod-
raging” mother who could not resist the temptation to kick anything with
three legs. At the same time, she sex-ploitated him and she demanded that
he be “the man of the house.” This had the effect of making him “wrong,
bad and evil,” no matter what he did. (See GENITAL PROBLEMS --
MALE)

SCURVY (Bleeding, swelling and weakness due to vitamin C deficiency)

“Singled out for shit.” They are feeling singularly mistreated, and they feel
that they are unable to do anything about it. They tend to be “victim-
tripping” and full of undirected resentment as they get stuck in re-running
scenarios of the past and in dreading the future.

Their experience is that they are overwhelmed and exhausted by the

requirements of life. It feels like it is too much for them to handle, and they
have the conviction they can’t expect to have rest, joy and love in their
lives. Instead, their lot seems to be one of having to “sit there and take it.” It
is the result of growing up in a slyly sadistic dysfunctional family.

“SEA-SICKNESS”

“Gone overboard.” They have annihilation-anxiety and a fear of death

arising from the feeling that things are out of control. They have the fear
that “the ship will go down” if they aren’t holding down the helm
personally in a “hands-on” control trip. They don’t trust the Universe or the

884
“Home Office (All that Is),” much less theirs or anyone else’s subconscious
manifestations.

They are heavily into grief-avoidance and self-disgust, as if they were

personally responsible and accountable for the sad state of affairs of the
world. It arises from being the “sensible one” in a self-defeating and
dysfunctional family.

SEBACEOUS CYST (Infected oil gland)

“Blockage-anger.” They are harboring a great deal of anger and inhibited

aggression over their circumstances. They feel completely blocked in their
situation by the world around them. They have many frustrated desires and
resentments over restrictions, in a feeling of victimization. They are in
effect running the same old painful movie in their head, and they are
nursing old hurts and current examples, all of which creates a false growth.
Underlying the pattern is a guilt-based self-rejection generated in a blame-
throwing, shame-inducing and victimizing family.

SEBORRHIC KERATOSIS

“Mission issues.” They are having real world-mastery conflicts, and they
are prone to try to prove themselves in areas where they aren’t capable. At
the same time, they are bothered by how much they aren’t allowed to use
their expertise.

To make matters worse, they have strong longings which can’t be realized
at present. This all results from a hostile atmosphere in the environment that
involves attempts to penetrate their defenses.

They have a notable lack of peace and harmony in their life, and they are
continuously uneasy, unsettled and feeling threatened by the world. At base,
they want to elevate other people’s consciousness and to integrate spiritual
and sacred information and energies into the world.

They are very sensitive and good at getting the feel of things, and they want
to share this. But they have been so misunderstood and ill-treated that they

885
have had to withdraw into their core to protect their individuality and
integrity.

As a result, they ended up with “body armor,” because their experience was
that “love is a poison apple.” They therefore have to maintain an “armed
garrison” composed of love-deflectors and vulnerability-avoidance.

They grew up in a severely dysfunctional family who did not understand

them at all, resulting in the family’s becoming invasively an abusive
environment of utterly untrustworthy relationships.

SEIZURES

“Overload.” They are being bombarded with “do the impossible with
nothing while everything that matters rides on it” demands. They feel
pressured and persecuted by the environment, which is an old, familiar
story to them. They are full of fear, despair and rage about their condition,
and their present circumstances took it over the top.

They were expected to carry the weight of the world (their severely
dysfunctional family), while at the same time being told that they can do
nothing right and that they are the cause of everyone’s problems.

***********************************

“Throwing in the towel.” They are running away from themselves, their
family, life, everything. They feel totally overwhelmed and outclassed by
the demands of life. They have little sense of capability and cope-ability,
and there is no feeling of support from the Universe.

It arises from having too much expected of them as a child, a situation made
only made worse by the appearance of the seizures and the experience of
having a “broken brain.” The seizures also often additionally function as
guilt-relief from past life events. (See EPILEPSY)

SELF-INDUCED ILLNESSES

886
“I need mommy.” They have an extreme dependency and care-coercing
pattern arising from a severely self-immersed or otherwise unavailable
family. They concluded that getting ill was the only way they could get any
energy directed their way.

SELF-POISONING (Via their own biochemistry)

“You have no right to exist!” This is the ultimate expression of self-

rejection -- self-destruction by their own body. They have the fundamental
conviction that they have no right to be here taking up space and resources
because they are the original “moral cretin.” It is the result of severe
rejection from the very beginning, to the accompaniment of “NOW look
what you’ve caused!” messages out the wazoo.

“SEMI-SNORTING” (Short, intense breathing through the nose -- as

though in rage)

“Raging bull.” They are intensely angry and preparing to attack. They have
a tremendous frustration and disgusted rage with how things are. They are
an “infantile tyrannosaurus” who was in effect capitulated to by the family,
to the point where they are now a never-endingly angry and unpleasable
“rage-aholic.”

SENILITY

“Slowly disengaging.” They are gradually leaving this plane, and they
spend long periods of time “out there” processing what has happened in this
life, “going to Cosmic school,” and deciding what to do as their next step.
They have difficulty staying in the here and now, as they want to be “out
there.”

However, they do “check in” here every once in a while, resulting in brief
periods of lucidity. They always were a little detached and uninvolved, due
to their partially withdrawing from their dysfunctional and/or possessive
family early on.

***********************************

887
“Return to Childhood.” They are seeking to the so-called “safety” of
childhood, and they long for the security of the “good old days.” They are,
in effect, demanding care and attention with no energy or contribution
returned. It is a form of escapism, control and/or revenge. It is the ultimate
outcome of a severely confidence-undermining childhood. (See
ALZHEIMER’S; DEMENTIA)

SENSORY-MOTOR INTEGRATION SYNDROME (In infancy or

childhood, usually)

“Booming, buzzing confusion.” They are overwhelmed by environmental

inputs, either due to sensory overload, or to the incompatibility of the inputs
they have gotten from the onset of their life.

The result is a “critical period” disruption of the integrative function, and

they can’t handle the integration demands of the environment. It is the
result of a rather massively over-stimulating intrauterine and early infancy
experience, arising from primarily maternal severe emotional conflict
and/or stress overload.

SEPSIS (Runaway infection due to the body’s over-reaction to the poisons

bacteria generate. It’s often fatal.)

“Fury flare-up.” There is a great deal of anger arising out of a chronic

resentment-rage over their situation that has now “gone over the top.” There
is an intense inner conflict and generalized hostility has taken on extreme
physical form.

They are being massively stressed by current circumstances, and this has
resulted in their becoming furious and suspicious about everything that is
happening to them. Now it has gotten to the point where it is out of control -
- with very dangerous results. It got started in a severely dysfunctional
family in which nothing worked right, and in which nothing could
effectively be done about it -- with often disastrous results that just had to
be lived with.

DEATH BY SEPSIS

888
“Outta here!” At some deep level, they arrived at the conclusion that they
couldn’t take it any more, and they could do nothing about it anyway. So
they left.

*********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

SEPTIC SHOCK (Shut-down of vital organs by severe infection runaway)

“Going down the tubes.” Their fulminating fury has gotten to the point
where they can no longer put up with their life the way it has been going.
They are in a situation where they have to radically change their way of life
-- or leave the planet.

SEPTICEMIA (See BLOOD POISONING)

“SHAKES” (Involuntary repetitive jerking movement episodes)

“Scared out of their mind.” They feel the effects of deep-seated dreads and
terrors of the things they dare not speak of from long ago. The “shakes” are
an implication reaction to the reactivation of the “ghosts of Christmases
past” by current circumstances.

Their present situation either represent, the same process, or its happening
involves a breaking out of the old patterns by them, which terrifies their
“inner child.” Their “inner child” still believes that things haven’t changed,
and that their life (and possibly their soul) is on the line.

It arises from having been intensely programmed never to “grow away” or

to “grow up” by an intensely possessive family (especially the mother),
including the installation of “death implants” (“all points bulletins” to the
environment on the subconscious level to destroy them for “stepping out of

889
line” or for moving away from the “tie that grinds”). It can also involve
horror reactions to the possibility of the return of virulent violence.

SHALLOW BREATHING

“Intense repression.” They are too afraid to live life fully, and they are
suppressed and superficial in their functioning. They live in a shallow and
meaningless manner. They are reluctant to give, to share, to enter into, to
participate, or to become involved. They are also avoidant of taking in, of
absorbing, of being vulnerable, of merging, or of forming relationships.
They are holding tightly to themselves, and they are resistant to letting go,
to surrendering themselves into life.

They are the product of a horrifying and frighteningly dysfunctional family

who subjected them to extreme suppression and oppression, with the threat
of annihilation continuously hanging in the air. They were to be seen and
not heard from, and they were to “hear no evil, see no evil and speak no
evil” about what they witnessed, deduced and understood.

SHIGELLOSIS (“The trots,” fever, vomiting, cramps)

“NO! Not now! Not ever!” They are being confronted with a requirement
that is totally terrifying them. They will go to almost any extremes not to
face this experience, but the Universe is now forcing them to take it on.

It can be anything from cosmic issues such as trust of the Universe to

commitment-avoidance, to dealing with their underlying profound
depression or self-rejection or whatever. It got started in this life with severe
emotional neglect and/or rejection as an infant and beyond by their
intensely abusive and awareness-avoidant mother.

“SHINGLES” (Painful viral infection and blisters along the nerves)

“Generalized dread.” They are in effect “waiting for the other shoe to drop.”
They are experiencing much anxiety that things will go badly for them, and
they labor under much fear and tension as they anticipate disaster.

890
They have a great need and desire for nurturance, protection and affection.
Their agitated anxiety is a result in their being hypersensitive in the “finding
the cat is stomping loudly” fashion. There is also a great deal of anger,
frustration, along with a fair amount of hostility expression.

It comes from having been buffeted-about helplessly by the self-destructive

lifestyle of their dysfunctional family.

SHIN PROBLEMS

“Going to hell in a breadbasket.” They are experiencing a breakdown of the

manifestation of their ideals and standards in their life. Somehow quality-
control, integrity, calibration, and caution have been thrown to the winds,
and/or they are unable to conservatively and self-protectively hold things
back.

They feel no sense of safety, security or sacredness in the world, and that
God has abandoned them. It is a return to an old, familiar feeling from
when they were the only one who cared about standards in their
dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“No way, Jose!” They are engaged in active resistance to required

manifestation. They are intensely ambivalent or unwilling to make the
changes in their situation and functional operation that are being indicated
or imposed in their life experience.

They are most reluctant to make the move, and they are dragging their feet
at every step of the way. The result is that they are tripping themselves up
and “shooting themselves in the foot” over and over. Change meant things
going from bad to worse when they were a child, and their motto is “Leave
well enough alone!”

RIGHT SHIN

“What if...?” They are having difficulty with selecting resources and
procedures for protecting the processes of their life, or with moving

891
themselves forward, because anything they choose could lead to unexpected
disasters.

LEFT SHIN

“Self-distrust.” They feel that the directions being taken by their life are
incautious and lacking in conservative common sense, or they feel that they
have to be paranoically careful about the directions they want to go in
moving themselves forward.

“SHIN SPLINTS” (Intense contractions and pain in their shins)

“Double-crossed.” It feels like they are being betrayed a lot, just like in the
“bad old days” of their dysfunctional and untrustworthy family.

RIGHT “SHIN SPLINTS”

“Not allowed.” They are feeling betrayed in the arena of being able to
control the quality of their own outputs.

LEFT “SHIN SPLINTS”

“Shooting themselves in the foot.” They feel like they are betraying
themselves when they seek to manifest their intentions and aspirations.

“SHIVERING”

“Alone on their own.” They are experiencing abandonment-anxiety and

grief reactions, due to having had to take care of and rear themselves “by
their own boot-straps” from the very beginning. They are experiencing a
maternal and later deprivation reaction.

“SHOCK REACTION”

“I’m outta here!” They are into complete overwhelm and overload -- a “too
much to handle” reaction. Their system just can’t take any more traumas.
They simply can’t cope with any more negativity in their lives.

892
While the particular precipitating event is a systems overload, there is still a
component to their reaction which reflects an underlying experience of this
trauma’s being the “straw that broke the camel’s back.” It is the result of
their having been routinely traumatized in their severely dysfunctional
family, and subsequently as well.

SHORTNESS OF BREATH

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have a pronounced fear of the

environment. There is an agitated anticipation of a condition that could
cause the loss of life’s joys, and they are experiencing tension and mental
stress.

So they have taken to “taking first,” and to fending off vulnerability

whenever possible. They tend to be unable to communicate, and to be
angrily selfish and/or misusing of love. However, this results in constant
anxiety that someone or something will take it all away from them, in a
return of their childhood experience.

It all started with trauma in the womb or shortly thereafter, with the result
that they feel that the world is not a safe place when they are vulnerable or
under stress. They don’t trust the Universe, because it feels like it has never
been there for them, and like they have always had to fend off an invasive
and exploitative world.

SHOULDER BLADE PROBLEMS (Flat, triangular bone at the back of the

shoulder) [Scapulas]

“Re-evaluation time.” They have to re-think their whole relationship to their

responsibilities. Their entire structure around this issue is crumbling, and
they have no foundation to rely on here. Their fundamental approach to life
is not working for them any more, and they are in an existential crisis. They
have real difficulty carrying their responsibilities joyfully, and they have
conflicts between their responsibilities and their capacity for intimacy and
joy in life. They are finding that they really resent the load they have
carried, and that they have to change their whole lifestyle in regards to
where their boundaries and real responsibilities lie.

893
They adapted to a family environment that demanded they serve as the
“family hoist.” They now have to start over again, and to free themselves
from their old values, beliefs and commitments regarding their relationship
to responsibility.

RIGHT SHOULDER BLADE

“The buck stops here.” They have always felt that it is their sole
responsibility to make things work. They have taken an over-responsible,
underappreciated and hyper-accountable role, because they found out early
on that if they didn’t do this, all hell would break loose.

Now they suddenly have to re-evaluate and re-decide what exactly their
responsibilities in the world around them actually are.

LEFT SHOULDER BLADE

“Alone on their own.” They have been carrying the load of meeting all their
own needs. They encountered a maternal expectation that they make no
demands, that they have no needs, and/or that they deserve no help from
any friends. This got started early on, and they have taken that as the
foundation assumption of their whole lifestyle.

Now they have found that they can’t continue in that manner any more, that
inter-dependence is the only way to fly. They are deeply discombobulated
by this change in their life. They have to re-think their whole relationship to
the Universe, in the direction of finding that God does love and support
them.

PAIN BETWEEN THE SHOULDER BLADES

“Vulnerability-avoidance.” They are having emotional opening or

emotional compression problems. They are unwilling to open their “heart
center,” due to untrustworthy parenting.

SHOULDER JOINT PROBLEMS

894
“Hell no, I won’t go!” They are at the point where “This is an up with
which I will no longer put!” They have been “keeping their shoulder to
wheel” and “carrying the world on their shoulders” all their life, and they
are now no longer willing to do so. They are fed up with it all, and they
want to start a life of their own instead of being continuously “in harness.”

It all got started when they were put in the “family hoist” position in their
dependent dysfunctional family, after the family had not been there for them
emotionally from the very beginning.

***********************************

“You can go ahead without me!” They are very upset with the direction
things are taking in their life. They have a deep distrust of the Universe, and
they are convinced that any changes in their life are going to be for the
worst.

Yet things ARE changing, and they are rigidly resisting with all they’ve got.
They are the product of a conservative, patriarchal, and rather cynical
family.

RIGHT SHOULDER JOINT

“What are you DOING!?” They are deeply alarmed at the turn that things
are taking, and they feel that a “ship of fools” is taking us down the tubes.
They therefore feel a drastic need to take “hands on” control of the situation
and/or system. At the same time, they have had it “up to the gills” with this
kind of responsibility. But then again, they feel that they can’t just stand by
and let it happen.

The result is that they are prone to become immobilized in conflict,

frustration and self-cancellation.

LEFT SHOULDER JOINT

“Butt out, Buster!” They are intensely resistive to any intervention in their
life. They are rather rigidly conservative and fiercely self-sustaining, self-
contained and self-sufficient, in an “island unto themselves” manner.

895
Their life is moving in a new direction recently, and they don’t like it one
bit. They also decidedly do not want other people to have any say or impact
on their way of doing things.

SHOULDER JOINT REPLACEMENT

“Everything always falls on my shoulders!” They have the feeling that the
burdens they carry are not their own. They resent the “heaviness” of life,
and they feel that they are carrying the weight of the world on their
shoulders.

RIGHT SHOULDER

“Behind the scenes Atlas.” They are constantly taking the over-responsible,
underappreciated and hyper-accountable role. End of that story!

LEFT SHOULDER

“Alone and alien.” They feel that they have to handle all their needs, with
no help from non-existent friends. They had enough of that old story!

SHOULDER PROBLEMS

“Everything always falls on my shoulders!” The shoulders reflect our

feelings and thoughts about what we are doing and how we are doing it, as
well as our attitudes about how we are being related to and about our
responsibilities. Shoulders are the seat of responsibility, and difficulties here
reflect a feeling of being over-burdened.

They fear the “heaviness” of life, and they feel that they are carrying the
weight of the world on their shoulders. They have a feeling that the burdens
they shoulder are not their own. They have real difficulty carrying their
responsibilities in a joyful manner, and they make life a drag with their
attitude. Their experience is that they are carrying an overload of
responsibilities with no assistance and no enjoyment.

Their feeling is that they can expect no fulfillment of their desires. They
feel over-weighted with requirements, and there is a considerable amount of

896
suppressed fear, frustration, guilt and anger at the load they have to carry. It
is the result of their having to be the “family hoist” or at least the “sane
one” in their dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“I’ll blow it!” They have issues around success in the world and around in
intimacy, regarding their manifestation and integration. They feel that they
can’t express themselves freely, and that they have to be excessively careful
how they mediate between their emotions and their actions, as if “a slip of
the lip could sink the ship.”

There is a sense of bondage to a heavy load of both self-governance and

self-preservation, on the one hand, and of having to care for others, on the
other. They are the product of an enmeshed and invasively possessive and
suppressive family.

RIGHT SHOULDER PROBLEMS

“Hands-on control.” They are betrayal-anxious and rescue-tripping, in a

controlling and assertive action pattern. They feel they have to aggressively
pursue the solution of the problems they see around them, and they regard
themselves to be the “buck stops here” authority in the situation.

They are constantly concerned about letting those who depend on them
down if they take care of their own needs. They are taking the “behind-the-
scenes hero(ine)” over-responsible, underappreciated, and hyper-
accountable role. They are very work-and responsibility-oriented. They
found out early on that if they didn’t handle things, nobody would, and all
hell would result.

LEFT SHOULDER PROBLEMS

“Sealed unit.” They are intensely isolated, alienated and self-contained, in

an “island unto themselves” -- “urban hermit” total self-responsibility
pattern. They feel they have to handle all of their needs, with no help from
their non-existent friends.

897
They feel that vulnerability, dependency, receptivity and reactivity are just
plain out of the question. They are also suspicious of the creative and
feminine aspects of themselves. It is a “Mother, please, I’d rather do it
myself!” attitude that grew out of “Child, please, I’d rather you did it
yourself” parenting.

“FROZEN SHOULDERS”

“Hell no, I won’t go!” They have reached the point where “This is an up
with which I will no longer put!” regarding the responsibilities and
requirements of life. They feel that they have been overloaded and under-
supported and unappreciated, and that they are in effect doing a “sit down
strike.”

The problem is that they can’t opt out of service, in addition to which the
cumulative damage to the shoulders has reached severe physical form. They
therefore find themselves in deeper water than ever.

There simply HAS to be a reasonable solution worked out so that they don’t
undo the physical healing, and to avoid re-plunging themselves into their
over-responsible role any more. It all got started when they were placed in
the “family hoist” and the “sane one” position in their severely
dysfunctional, self-immersed and at-risk family.

SHOULDER TENSION

“Responsibility pains.” They are taking on the cares of the world. They are
“care-taking” with insufficient help and resources -- taking on too much.
This results in feelings of victimization, of being overwhelmed, of not being
able to handle what’s going on, and they feel that they are “dragging
through” life with a huge “ball-and-chain” behind them.

They have many restrained desires and frustrated needs, and they don’t
know how to get support, to let down and rest, to have fun, or to handle
their “overwhelm” feelings. This whole pattern got started when they had to
take on the “associate parent” or the “role-reversed” parenting position in
their dysfunctional family.

898
SICKLE CELL ANEMIA (Clogging of the arteries, coupled with severe
joint pains)

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They have a firm belief that they are “not good
enough” that is so strong that it destroys their capacity for joy of life. They
are full of inferiority feelings, and they are utterly self-rejecting. There is
and was no love in their life, and those around them were thoroughly
convincing they were a “moral cretin” and absolutely worthless.

“SIDE ACHE” (Acute pain in the abdominal/waist area on either side)

“Things that go bump in the night.” They are “deathly afraid” of intangible,
ineffable and unidentifiable frightening possibilities that leap out
unanticipated and uncontrollably at them. It feels very much as if the world
is composed of hidden hostile forces who have it in for them and/or for
everybody. It comes from growing up in a “magical misery tour” experience
of life in a severely dysfunctional and destructive family.

RIGHT SIDE ACHE

“Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get me!” They
feel very unsafe in the world, with other people, and/or in relation to the
Universe. That is because they are “under siege” from their environment in
some way at present.

LEFT SIDE ACHE

“I have met the enemy -- and it is me!” They are deeply distrusting of their
own motivation and manifestation system. It can refer to “run amok-
anxiety,” to competence-anxiety, and/or to self-destruct-anxiety.

“S.I.D.S.” (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome)

“Job done.” This was all the soul wanted, and it selected the situation
knowing in advance what would result. It wanted this particular womb and
the experiences that would be forthcoming for the soul’s own purposes.

***********************************

899
“Can’t handle it.” Checking it out and finding that it was too much to
handle for them, they wanted out. They’ll design more carefully next time,
based on this learning experience.

***********************************

“Forget this!” There just wasn’t enough relevant support for their particular
needs, so they simply stopped breathing.

***********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

SIGHING (Repeatedly)

“Sadness signals.” They are experiencing long-standing suffering and

resignation-despair. They are capitulating to their fate because there doesn’t
seem to be any alternative, due to the utter pervasiveness and
penetratingness of their formative family’s invasions and underminings of
their capabilities.

***********************************

“Pseudo-sorrow.” They are engaging in guilt-inducing martyring

manipulation or in a “gamey” bid for attention along the lines of being
“noble” and harassed/harried. In this version, they found a way to control
the family by moral manipulation, shame-elicitation, and impression-
mismanagement, and they have become an emotional tyrant and “con artist”
as a result.

SILICON POISONING (From implants)

“Self-disgust.” They are operating out of a deep criticism of authority, and

out of feeling very put upon and exploited. They have an abiding distrust of

900
the Universe, but underneath it all, there is a rather thorough-going self-
rejection.

It was generated by an oppressive and patriarchal household. This all arises

out of a refusal to handle multi-life problems in their relationship with the
Cosmos and with the world around them that have come up again.

SINUS PROBLEMS

“Romancing the stone.” They feel they have lost someone they loved a
great deal, or that they have never had the love they needed from someone
they loved deeply. They feel that they somehow caused the abandonment or
loss, and they are compulsively “looking for love in all the wrong faces,”
and they are trying in all the wrong ways to win love via perfectionistic
performance. It backfires, though, with the result there is much “inner
crying.”

They are trying to “put a better ending on the old story” with “standins for
the original cast.” They are trying to “squeeze blood from a turnip,” they
are profoundly hurt by and they deeply resent the way it is going. This
whole thing got started in an attempt to prevent the loss of parental love,
particularly of paternal validation. It never worked.

***********************************

“How dare they!” They are experiencing strong irritation with someone
close, in a hypersensitive “persecution complex” manner. They are having
many irritated feelings, leading to a considerable restriction of their actions.

This whole thing is a warning they are attracting revenge, retaliatory and
other negative thoughts in their direction. The reason is that they are being
over-discriminating and judgmental in an excessively disciplined and
annoying manner. They are the product of an invasive and angry
dysfunctional family.

***********************************

901
“Never at peace.” There is chronic agitation and an unsettled condition that
is seemingly impossible to heal. They are desperately trying to arrive at
some sort of freedom from tension. It seems that everywhere they go, they
run into more trouble.

The entire complex got started and was maintained by an intense “never
good enough” parenting process. This whole pattern may represent karmic
issues that have to be dealt with in this life.

RIGHT SINUS PROBLEM

“Betrayed.” They are feeling that the world is letting them down in its
manifestation.

LEFT SINUS PROBLEM

“I asked for it.” They are engaged in self-rejection based on the assumption
that they deserve the disappointments and deprivations they are
experiencing.

SINUS CONGESTION

“Inner crying.” They are having a reaction to an experienced rejection from

someone they love, or they are undergoing an exacerbation of or a return of
their long-standing feeling they have never had the love they needed from
someone they loved very deeply. They feel that they somehow caused the
abandonment, rejection or loss.

They are trying to put a new ending on the old story with “standins for the
original cast.” But it doesn’t work, of course, and they end up being
dominating, possessive, irritated and controlling. In effect, they are
attempting to “squeeze blood from a turnip,” and they deeply resent the
results.

The whole thing started and maintained by an intense “never good enough”
parenting pattern.

SINUS HEADACHES (Lollapalooza pain in the sinus cavities)

902
“Wailing in pain.” They are suffering from suppressed grief, abandonment-
anxiety, and frustration with their intimates about insufficient support and
love -- an issue dating back to childhood.

SINUSITIS (Inflammation leading to blockage, greenish discharge, and

pain in the sinuses)

“Intimate irritation.” They are having a lot of problems with their closest
intimate, and it is making them very despairingly angry. They keep trying to
run the show, to make the other person dance to their tune, and it doesn’t
work. They are very resentful and grief-stricken at the same time. It is a
pattern that got started in their oppressive and enmeshed family.

SKELETON PROBLEMS

“Paradigm shift.” The basic structure of their life is crumbling around and
within them. They suddenly feel like a jellyfish that has no inner structure
to rely upon. The foundational beliefs and values upon which they built
their life no longer work for them. It is an existential crisis which requires a
re-thinking of their entire structure.

They adapted to a family environment that either was tied to dying values
or was severely dysfunctional. The result is that now they have to start all
over again, and they have to free themselves from dependence on their old
values, beliefs and commitments.

SKIN PROBLEMS

“I hope I pass the audition.” They have intense concerns about how they
think others see them, how they fit into the norms of society, and how they
see themselves, along with their deeper insecurities. They are embarrassed,
ashamed and guilty, and there are feelings of inferiority, low self-esteem,
obstruction and ostracism. They are concerned about how good an example
they are to others.

All of this is the result of their being a “sensitive” in a severely denial-

dominated dysfunctional family who used and abused them. They were

903
used for their sensitivity, out of the need for contact, for their tenderness,
and for their desire to elevate.

The family in effect abused them for being intensely threatening, for being
disturbingly different, and for being difficult to comprehend, if at all. So
they had to play the role of the “alarming Martian.”

*************************************

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They are having real world-mastery problems, and

they try to prove themselves in areas where they aren’t capable. At the same
time, they are bothered by how much they aren’t allowed to use their
expertise. To make matters more intense, they have strong longings which
can’t be realized at the present. This often results from a hostile atmosphere
in the environment that involves attempts to penetrate their defenses.

They have a notable lack of peace and harmony in their lives, and they are
continuously uneasy, unsettled and threatened by the world. At base, they
want to elevate other people’s consciousness, and to integrate spiritual and
sacred information and energies into the world.

They are very sensitive and good at getting the feel of things, and they want
to share this. They have been so misunderstood and ill-treated that they
have had to withdraw into their core to protect their individuality and
integrity. They grew up in a family who did not understand them, and who
became invasively abusive.

*************************************

“Intensely irritated.” They are bored, annoyed, frustrated and impatient.

They are troubled by their unexpressed unlovely thoughts about others that
have arisen out of all this. There is a lot of anxiety and fear from old, buried
“mucky stuff,” including from past lives. They have a feeling of being
threatened in some way, which is a warning to watch their attitude, because
they are letting things “get under their skin.”

Underpinning much of their situation is an unwillingness to forgive and

forget the past, and they are prone to intensely critical attitudes. They have

904
always felt like some sort of “stranger in a strange land,” and they have
never “fit in.” For some, blemishes become an excuse for withdrawing
altogether.

At the base of all this is a hidden habit of fear and “raw nerves,” along with
a deep-seated emotional conflict between the desire for affection and the
fear of being hurt if it is sought. They learned early on that “love is a poison
apple” in their severely dysfunctional and ambivalent family.

“HORNY” GROWTHS ON THE SKIN

“Body armor.” Their experience is that “love is a poison apple,” and they
therefore have to maintain an “armed garrison” composed of love-deflectors
and vulnerability-avoidance. It is the result of untrustworthy relationships in
their dysfunctional family.

INFLAMMATION OF THE SKIN

“Urban hermit.” This is a case of a fiery suppressed sexuality and eroticized

spiritual longings in an intimacy-avoiding destiny-deflector. They have
developed a “pariah complex” in which they feel totally unwelcome
wherever they go, arising out of their guilt and shame about their erotic
nature. There is a good deal of resentment about that. They are product of
an invasively intrusive and over-possessive “tantalizing tarantula” sex-
ploitative mother in a patriarchal household.

*******************************

“Irrelevant perfectionism.” They are harboring deep narcissistic resentment

and hostility towards women, especially their intimates. They are prone to
spiritual addiction and impractical idealism, with a systematic refusal to be
grounded. They operate out of unrealistic “perfect tree house”-seeking and
an inability to manifest. It is the result of over-indulgent and interference-
running possessive maternal parenting. (See the area(s) affected for more
information)

INFLAMMATION OF THE SKIN -- WITH PIMPLES AND CRUSTING

905
“Get outta my space!” They are feeling boundary-invaded and raped by
their environment, and they are intensely infuriated by it. At the same time,
there is a sense of helplessness to do anything about it. It arises from a
history of such experiences in their dysfunctional family.

PEELING OR FLAKING SKIN

“Molting.” It is time to shed outmoded thought patterns, old impressions,

stored feelings from the past, etc. They are moving into a new phase of their
life, on some level.

It is a “beauty and the beast” -- “professional pariah” pattern. It reflects

either past life karma which generates rejection and ostracism, or sidelines
watching-producing deviance, for purposes of “field anthropological site
visit” objective observation and interpretation capabilities.

In both cases, there is an extreme sense of separation and unacceptability --

to the world and to God. They were the “ejectee/rejectee/dejectee” in their
dysfunctional family.

********************************

“Love is a poison apple.” There is a strong experience of isolation and

alienation, with a repulsive and protective armor shield against love. They
are rejection-expecting and rejection-eliciting, and they often reject back
and reject first.

Their appearance often precipitates parental rejection, which then generates

and exacerbates the situation, via severely ambivalent parenting and self-
shielding-inducing experiences, along with perennial emotional isolation
during childhood.

The task/challenge is to learn that they deserve love, to let love in, to accept
themselves as they are, and to know that God loves them unconditionally.

SKIN MITES

906
“Getting to me.” They are allowing others to get under their skin so that
their thinking is infected. They are self-belittling and lacking in confidence,
and they are very vulnerable to accusation and attribution.

They are also very dependent and structure-seeking, out of feeling they
don’t have the ability or identity to think for themselves, to run their own
life, or to take care of themselves. It comes out of a highly denigrating and
competence-undermining family. (See the affected areas for more
information)

SKIN RASHES

“Frustrated interventions.” They are feeling thwarted in their attempts to

make a difference. It is intensely irritating them, and it is being complicated
by the emergence of their own inner conflicts in the area involved.

It is an old, familiar feeling, as they grew up in a family who were forever

preventing them from carrying out their intentions, and who programmed
them to do it to themselves. (See RASHES)

THICK, COLORED SKIN PATCHES

“Rhinoceros trip.” They are protecting themselves from life, because they
can’t trust themselves to be there for themselves or to take care of
themselves. They also don’t trust the Universe, which feels indifferent to
their welfare, as well as potentially dangerous.

It comes from growing up in a severely self-immersed or otherwise non-

available and simultaneously denigrating and confidence-demoralizing
parenting pattern. They felt that they had no options, so they withdrew into
their core in a vulnerability-avoidant and pain-minimizing strategy. (See the
areas affected for more information)

SKIN-SHEDDING WOUND (The outer skin comes off, revealing a bloody

undersurface that lasts a long time and which doesn’t seem to respond to
antibiotics.)

907
“Ghosts of Christmas past.” They are in effect re-experiencing “tape loops”
from their formative period that harped on how “bad, wrong and evil” they
were. They have spent the years since living down and disengaging from
these negative evaluations and accusations.

They are now being required to expunge them for once and for all, so that
they in no way continue to carry these poisonous messages in their
psychological makeup. This can represent either a resurgence of the power
of the “implants” or a healing crisis process where they have worked their
way down to this earliest level of their damaging experiences in their life.
They were much maligned by their severely dysfunctional and denigrating
family. (See the body part(s) effected for more information)

“SKIN TABS” (Little skin flaps created by necklaces, bracelets, etc.)

“Self-Invalidation.” They have propensity to negate the significance of or to

self-reject/self-punish for “daring” to put on attractive or alluring body
adornments, in a kind of “Who do you think you are?” reaction.

In so doing, they are reflecting their incorporated evaluations from their

family to the effect that they are somehow inferior, inflated or insignificant,
and that they therefore have no right to positive social evaluations.

The depth and severity of this feeling towards themselves determines how
much of a problem how unsightly the “tabs” are. It can range all the way
out to deep-seated feelings that “I’m a shit!” in the case particularly intense
or subtly hurtful rejection.

SLEEP APNEA (Interruptions of breathing while sleeping)

“Maternal deprivation.” They are intensely sensitive, fearful and longing for
mother love or love from someone close. They have a lot of
disappointment, bitterness, unforgivingness and resentment about being
over-worked.

At the same time, they dare not express or even acknowledge these feelings
out of fear of total rejection and abandonment. They tend rather strongly to

908
be fatalistic, hostility-repressing, compulsively over-giving, hypersensitive
and lonely.

They are also full of family taboos, social restrictions and moral inhibitions,
all of which were learned in an intensely repressive family which forced a
“model child” adjustment on them.

There is a great deal of deep-seated guilt, shame and grief arising out of
this, and they are joy-avoidant, happiness-squashing and love-deflecting, all
in the misguided hope they will thereby finally “earn” the “God
Housekeeping Seal of Approval.” In effect, they are so self-suppressing that
they are suffocating themselves.

SLEEP-DEPRIVATION SYNDROME (Irritability, confusion, fight-flight

reaction)

“Red-orange alert.” They are on intense vigilance and “hair-trigger”

reactivity. They don’t dare to relax because they don’t trust the process of
life. They have a disturbed mental condition, due to a subconscious shock,
and/or due to a chronic state of “red-orange alert.” They labor under a great
deal of guilt and fear over imagined failures and their consequences. There
has now also been an “emergency preparation” activated by current
circumstances. It arises from their having been the “sane one” in a severely
dysfunctional family.

“SLEEPING SICKNESS” (Bacterially-precipitated, compulsive sleep state,

often lethal)

“Lem’me outta here!” They are feeling drained and over-demanded, like
they have been cast adrift and abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that
Is). They can’t cope, due to extreme fear, and they are so “freaked out” that
they want to totally get away from it all.

They encountered an out-of-control dysfunctional family to which they had

to adapt, and in which they somehow had to survive. It has been that way
ever since, due to the imprinting effect that leads us to attract to ourselves
and to be attracted to that with which we grew up.

909
Now they’ve reached the point of total demoralization, and they can’t take
it any more, and they don’t want to be here at all.

SLEEP-WAKE SCHEDULE DISORDER

“Out of sync.” They are either disorganized in their sleep need, changeable
in their sleep pattern, or out of schedule with the world or their lifestyle. It
is the result of unusual life schedules and/or of a disrupted internal rhythm
generated by their dysfunctional family lifestyle as a child.

SLEEP-WALKING

“I’m in charge here!” They have a very strong felt need for “hands-on”
control of their life, as reflected in continued purposive efforts as they sleep.
Their need for control is so intense that it overcomes the usual
disengagement of the motor apparatus during sleep.

This felt need for control reflects a deep sense of distrust of the family,
when it is happening in a child. The family system is not working in
general, or for them in particular in some significant way, and they feel that
they have to “take the reins.” In an adult, it reflects a replay of their
childhood relationships and situations in their experiences now. They grew
up in a disorganized dysfunctional family, where they were the “sane one.”

SLOWED HEART RATE

“Alone on their own.” They have taken care of business with no help from
their non-existent friends since infancy. The result is a chronic low-key
depression reflected in their slowed down heart rate. They were expected to
meet their own needs in a “Child, PLEASE, I’d rather you do it yourself!”
parenting pattern.

SMALL INTESTINE PROBLEMS (First wave assimilation of nutrients)

“Assimilation problems.” They are having absorption difficulties and

problems in separating the wheat from the chaff. They are having
difficulties with analysis and with processing things. They are being
hampered by distorted discrimination and disturbing distrust generated by a

910
dysfunctional family’s “magical mystery tour” pattern, and by their being
subjected to systematic invalidation then and ever since.

***********************************

“Self-worth issues.” They are experiencing excessive guilt, self-doubt and

self-image problems. They feel unappreciated and also unsure of their
capability and value. They need appreciation, love, and understanding of
the kind they never got as a child in their accusatorially invalidating family.
(See DUODENAL ULCER; ILEITIS)

INFLAMMATION OF THE SMALL INTESTINE

“Roiling turmoil.” They are intensely resentful at their lot in life. They are
finding that they are experiencing a lot of unassimilable and uninterruptible
inputs. They come from a “poison apple” pseudo-loving and systematically
misleading, emotionally abusive family.

SMALL POX (Fever, pain, vomiting, boils that leave permanent

indentation scars)

“Moral cretin.” There is intense rage about restrictions, along with rage at
themselves for bringing these restrictions on themselves. They are highly
resentful about rules and regulations, along with environmental suppression
and oppression.

They are also convinced that at some level, they deserve the restrictions,
and they even take some measure of pleasure out of the “just desserts
punishment.” They are full of generalized malaise and contempt, but they
are the worst on themselves.

They have a great deal of self-disgust and self-hatred for being what they
are, and deep inside, they feel they must suffer as “atonement” for their
“violations of the moral order.” It all stems from a highly oppressive,
shame-inducing, blame-throwing and accusatory family.

SMOKE-INHALATION

911
“Rot-gut.” They are tending to take in and believe the “poisonous
pedagogy” they received as a child to the effect they are the cause of
everyone’s misery, and that they are responsible for “making it all better,”
while avoiding “setting off World War III” with their “evil propensities.”

“SNARLS” IN THE HAIR; HAIR TANGLES (Frequently or chronically)

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are conflicted and alarmed by the prospect of

their releasing their personal potency and/or passion, which seems to be
either in the works or already happening. It arises from a strongly
suppressive family culture which instilled a deep-seated fear of their inner
characteristics, motivations and resources.

SNEEZING (Frequently)

“Loss-grief.” They are experiencing a loss reaction, along with the

anticipation of further loss. It frequently comes up when they experience or
anticipate pleasure about something, and the thought or realization occurs
that they will lose it due to the situation, as a function of a history of losing
anything they cared about, and/or of a feeling that they don’t deserve joy.

This “loss-alarm” was generated by a family system that often DID result in
their experiencing loss or other negative consequences whenever they had
something worthwhile. It is also often a manifestation of the suppression of
the natural mourning response over their “childhood lost” and/or current
losses.

“SERIAL SNEEZING” (Several in a row -- frequently)

“Devastation-expectation.” They are experiencing anticipation of loss,

further loss, and/or abandonment/rejection. It arises from having had a
history of such experiences throughout their childhood.

CHRONIC SNEEZING

“Unfit for human consumption.” They are highly sensitive to deprivation

and rejection, and they are a habitual anticipator of these experiences. They

912
feel alone and lonely, with poor connection capabilities. So they are in a
continuous state of deprivation.

It reflects a family and subsequent history of deprivation, love-starvation,

lack of support, and consistent rejection. They were systematically treated
in such a manner as to make them chronically unsuccessful socially and in
intimacy.

“SNIFFLING” (Chronically)

“I don’t need anybody!” They are engaged in a denial of warm feelings and
in systematic intimacy-avoidance. They feel like a person without a
Cosmos. Their sniffling represents repressed grief and despair.

They were rejected in the womb and subsequently, and they experience
themselves as being “alone and alien,” living life with “no help from any
friends.” They are being told to heal their heart hurt, and to open their heart
into a co-creative experience.

*************************************

“Commitment-avoider.” They are a verbally facile manipulator and an

“artful dodger”-- “dance-away lover” -- “hope-hooker.” They have severe
doubts about their adequacy as a relationship figure. Their sniffling
represents repressed grief and despair.

Their family fussed over them, treating them as “special,” while at the same
time putting out “Don’t grow up!” and “Don’t be you!” injunctions. So they
live by their wits, a pattern they learned in this “no-escape” double-binding
intolerable situation.

SNORING

“Fossil-sawing.” They are stubbornly refusing to let go of old patterns.

They are in a chronically stuck situation in which they resent the past and
they fear the future. They have a strong distrust of the Universe, and they
are nursing a “broken heart.” They also feel personally responsible for
everything -- which they have to “do something about it.”

913
It reflects a “sealed unit” self-contained and “self-made person” -- “urban
hermit” pattern that resulted from their finding out early on that “love is a
poison apple.” Their family looked to the individual to solve all the family’s
problems, and they blamed them for everything that went wrong. So they
withdrew into themselves, and they vowed to handle everything all by
themselves.

“SNORTING” (Habitual abrupt outbursts of breath through the nostrils)

“Generalized disgust.” They are fed up with the workings of the world and
with other people. They grew up in a demoralizingly dysfunctional family,
and they ended up believing that nothing can ever work.

*************************************

“I’m home.” They are finding themselves making the sound of a contented
pig. It reflects a feeling of contentment and serenity after a prolonged period
of deprivation or difficulties. They are the product of a dysfunctional family
who exploited, deprived and/or abused them, and they became ensnared in
self-defeating patterns. They are now being able to leave that behind.

SOFTENING OF THE BONES

“Enough already!” They are disintegrating under the load of responsibilities

they have had to carry all their life. They have the feeling that they just
can’t support themselves and that their world single-handedly like they have
been doing all along.

They are just plain running out of steam from having had to “run on empty”
for so long. It just isn't in them any more. It reflects the fact that they had to
be the “tower of power” and the “support pillar” for their family as their
way of seeking the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” from their
exploitative, dysfunctional and withholding family.

“SOLAR FEVER” (Infectious fever)

“Burning up.” They are full of intense anger and stored resentments. They
are full of agitated worry and hurry, in fear of anticipated outcomes. There

914
is a severe lack of harmony and a lot of internal conflict. They have a fear
of or a reaction to loss of friendships -- abandonment feelings. It represents
an experienced return to the uncertainties and frustrations of their
dysfunctional family.

SOLAR PLEXUS PROBLEMS (Upper abdomen)

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They are suffering from powerlessness feelings, and

they feel overwhelmed by life. They have a strong fear of their gut
reactions, their intuitive hits, and their “inner voice.” They don’t trust their
capacity to make discriminations, evaluations and judgments.

They have lost touch with much of their personal potency and life energy.
Their feelings are easily hurt, and they are hypersensitive to rejection. They
are quite abandonment-anxious and betrayal-paranoid.

It comes from having been thoroughly undermined in their confidence and

self-trust by a wrong-making, denigrating, untrustworthy, rejecting,
abandonment-threatening, and rather severely dysfunctional family.

***********************************

“Papa/Mama knows best!” They are imperatively intrusive in an

authoritarian manner. They are full of critical judgmentalness and
insensitive boorishness, in a massively egocentric “What’s good for General
Bullmoose is good for everybody!” pattern. This comes from their being
positioned in or capitulated into a situation of coercive control within their
patriarchal dysfunctional family.

“SOMETHING IN THEIR EYE” (Frequently)

“Can’t believe their eyes.” A totally off-the-wall or unacceptable event or

reality has been witnessed or come to their attention, and they can’t believe
it’s true. It’s too far a field for their experience and/or values. It may well
reflect a rather restrictive, repressive or sheltered childhood.

SORES

915
“Staying mum.” They have a lot of suppressed and/or unexpressed anger
that settles in and becomes an irritant to their system. They are the product
of a suppressive family system where they learned it is definitely not O.K.
to express their feelings, especially their negative and angry feelings. (See
the area(s) affected for more information)

SORE THROAT

“Dr. Strangelove.” Like the movie character that constantly had to pull his
own hand away from his throat, they are self-strangling suppressing a
scream of grief-rage and deprivation-frustration. They feel cut off from
other people and unable to express themselves, particularly their negative
feelings.

They are holding in their angry words about their resentment over losses of
various kinds -- delays, being rushed, deprivations, love-loss, etc. The
withheld expressions of their feelings, needs and information and their
refusal to communicate with themselves or others the truth that needs to be
told is resulting in an inflammation of the communication organ.

This all started when they were given the message that they had to be
“acceptable” to get their love-line, so now they systematically suppress
their potentially unacceptable reactions, to their considerable frustration.

***********************************

“Judge and jury.” They are being judgmental, critical and resentful of other
people. There is an underlying guilt about all this that is resulting in an
anger-irritated throat. This pattern of negative evaluations of other people
came out of a withholding and sibling rivalry-encouraging family.

“SPASTIC COLON” (Sudden uncontrollable diarrhea attacks)

“Blow-out.” They are frantically sorting and shuffling ideas. They are
encountering a situation that requires that they process out the implications
and ramifications of what is going down. They fear that they will not be
able to have what it takes to handle the needs of the new developments.
Their feeling is that “I’m all I’ve got,” and that if they fail, all hell will

916
break loose. There was never any form of trustworthy support when they
were growing up, and they learned to take care of themselves in a “self-
made person” manner “disaster-deflecting” psychology.

***********************************

“Papa/Mama knows best!” They tend to push things on other people in a

bossy “unilateral good deeds” fashion. They can’t seem to “leave well
enough alone.” They have an abiding fear of the Universe, and they feel
that in effect they have to have “hands on” control of everything at all
times. They are simply terrified of letting go.

There was never anyone at the helm of the ship in their dysfunctional
family, and so they grabbed the wheel and never let go. Now they don’t
dare let go. Their current circumstances are precipitating a “loss of control”
panic reaction. (See DIARRHEA; “THE TROTS”)

“SPASTIC” DUODENUM (Convulsive closings of the start of the small

intestine)

“I don’t need you!” They have severe dependency-independency conflicts

resulting in their bending over backwards in ferocious independence, and in
their “taking their marbles and going home” refusals to receive and/or to
request support.

They have a marked maternal dependency and mother-fixation underlying

this pattern -- an extreme need for nurturance and affection arising from a
history of maternal deprivation.

SPHINCTER PROBLEMS

“Control issues.” They are intensely desirous of control, and yet they are
deeply disturbed by the responsibilities and lifestyle that their compulsive
control-seeking generates. They are therefore highly ambivalent about
control, resulting in a disruption of the “steady state” muscles.

It is a pattern that started when they were the “linchpin” person for their
family in childhood, the one whose sanity, solidity and strength deflected

917
disaster continuously.

SPINAL CORD PROBLEMS

“Insufficient to the cause.” They feel unequipped and/or permanently

damaged at the very core of their being and functioning system. They feel
unable to rise to the requirements of life, and they are thoroughly
demoralized. They are strongly inclined to “throw in the towel” in a
resentful resignation trip. They were systematically undermined in their
confidence and competence by an accusatory and passive-aggressively
dysfunctional family.

MENINGEAL SUBLUXATION (Spinal cord dislocation)

“Overload.” They are feeling taxed beyond their capacities to meet the
demands of their life situation. They are under a considerable amount of
emotional, mental and/or chemical stress.

This is a familiar pattern to them, and it got started in their dysfunctional

family, where they felt or were assigned the responsibility to “make it
better” or to “make up for it.”

MENINGITIS (Inflammation of the lining of the brain and the spinal cord)

“Pariah/outcast complex.” They are convinced that they are unacceptable to

human society, and that other people are incensed that they are here. They
feel attacked for their beingness, their personality.

They are enraged at life and inflamed in their thinking, and they are full of
blame and frustrated fury. They were regarded and treated as the
“Hunchback of Notre Dame” by their family, who, however, at the same
time systematically trained them to be a scapegoat.

SPINAL INJURY

“Don’t move!” Their experience is that the “balance of the Cosmos” rides
on their every move. They don’t dare move forward on anything.

918
They are the product of an extremely blame-throwing and responsibility-
and accountability-avoidant family who gave them a very strong “Don't
move until I tell you to!” injunction.

Now they are feeling the “weight of the world” and the “brunt of the pain of
the human race.”

*****************************

“Under siege.” They are undergoing an immobilizing fear and terror, a

feeling of utter helplessness and hopelessness. They feel they are under
attack from the Universe, and that nothing is trustworthy. They are mentally
and/or emotionally confused, they feel overwhelmed.

They are in a thorough-going escape mode, and they are doing all they can
to avoid an unwanted task or experience and/or to escape a situation or
person. They are experiencing an intense resistance to life, people and
things in a super-stubbornness reaction, and inadequate, and they lack self-
control at this point.

It is the result of having come up in an irrational and/or chaotic family in

which there was nothing they could do to change the course of events, to
improve the situation, or to provide themselves a better experience.

SPINAL DISC PROBLEMS

“I can’t handle it!” They are feeling outclassed and over-run by the
demands of life, and they are seeking to put off, slide around, or ignore the
requirements that are giving them the feeling they don’t have what it takes
to make it. It comes from having grown up in a household that either asked
far too much or far too little of them.

Each spinal disc has a different additional meaning associated with

problems around that disc. They are listed below:

SKULL/FIRST CERVICAL DISC (Head/neck)

919
“Cut off at the pass.” They have the intense feeling that they have been cast
adrift with no compass in uncharted seas that are potentially very
dangerous. They have to watch their flank with others as well, and they are
forever on the alert for how people are reacting to them.

It comes from their having been enculturated by a severely dysfunctional

family’s values, orientation and lifestyle that left them no guidelines with
which to work.

FIRST CERVICAL/SECOND CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“Lying low.” They are running from life and awareness, in a fearful
relationship to the Universe. They are afraid of social ostracism and the
truth, out of the expectation they would be in effect “royally reamed” if they
spoke up or spoke out.

As a result, they live a self-suppressing and denial-dominated lifestyle, with

an underlying deep resentment of having to do so. It arose from a
suppressive, repressive and perfectionistic parenting experience.

SECOND CERVICAL/THIRD CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“I could cause World War III!” They have real boundary problems, in that
they take on responsibility for everything that happens around them. They
therefore tend strongly to “disaster-deflect” as their primary approach to
things, emphasizing awareness-avoidance, guilt-grabbing, intervention-
deflection, or indiscriminate intervention.

They were looked to as the primal cause for everything by their family,
whether it took the form of blowing the cover on the family denial or of
setting off a chain reaction of events in the family. Their family was highly
blaming in their treatment of them.

THIRD CERVICAL/FOURTH CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“I caused World War II!” They feel personally responsible for everything
that goes wrong in their vicinity. As a result, they try to sit on themselves
and to “atone” for what happened. They allow themselves no leeway or

920
input of joy or resources, for fear of the wrath of God in a non-
comprehensible world. They were subjected to intense blame and shame-
induction as a child.

FOURTH CERVICAL/FIFTH CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“Alone on their own.” They have lost contact with the higher realms of
things, and they are therefore afraid of setting off calamities in an
unpredictable manner. They have taken to a self-suppressive and
compulsively concretely controlling approach to everything as a result.

They come from a family who blamed them when things went wrong, and
who made them wrong if they acted on their intuition.

FIFTH CERVICAL/SIXTH CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“Hands-on control.” They are intensely avoidant of all things intangible and
non-rational. They have a strictly three-dimensional model of the world,
and they are therefore ferociously determined not to let things get out of
hand, because “One strike and we’re out!” They feel that they are the only
one who can deflect ultimate disasters.

They come from a severely dysfunctional and anti-spiritual/ethereal

background, and they were systematically punished if they dealt with
anything beyond the five senses realm. At the same time, they were the
“sane one,” and they felt and were held accountable/ responsible for all that
went wrong.

SIXTH CERVICAL/SEVENTH CERVICAL DISC (Neck)

“Desert island.” Their experience of life is that it is a “vast wasteland” of

heartlessness and grimness. For them, life is about survival and the
minimization of pain, so they are inflexibly conceptual and harm-avoidant,
with a resulting sense of deprivation and resentment. They come from a
dysfunctional and severely dreary family.

SEVENTH CERVICAL/FIRST THORACIC DISC (Upper back)

921
“Overwhelmed.” They feel bereft of support from the Cosmos in an
impossible-to-handle world. They feel that they neither deserve nor can
have the resources necessary to make their life work. They are the product
of a demoralizingly dysfunctional and wrong-making family.

FIRST THORACIC/SECOND THORACIC DISC (Upper back)

“Mother, PLEASE, I’d rather do it myself!” They feel that the world is
untrustworthy, and that vulnerability and involvement are unsafe. They also
feel that things are out of hand, and that they can do little to make things
any better.

So they have retreated into an “island unto themselves” lifestyle. It comes

from growing up in an overwhelmingly dysfunctional and effectively
neglectful family.

SECOND THORACIC/THIRD THORACIC DISC (Upper back)

“Armed fortress.” They feel they live in an indifferent and hurtful world in
which no one cares, and in which nothing is trustworthy. They therefore are
pulled into their inner core in a constantly on guard, trouble-expecting and
wrong-making manner. They are the product of a severely dysfunctional
and blame-throwing family.

THIRD THORACIC/FOURTH THORACIC DISC (Upper back)

“Angry agitation.” They are intensely emotionally bothered all the time,
and they are highly blame-throwing and judgmental about it all. Their
experience is that they are surrounded by a “ship of fools” who are causing
all sorts of unpredictable mayhem, and they are intensely rageful about it.
They come from a severely wrong-making and blame-throwing family.

FOURTH THORACIC/FIFTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Bitter suppression.” They feel that life is dangerously untrustworthy, and

that they therefore have to avoid all forms of spontaneity, joy and feelings.
The result is a blame-throwing self-squashing that result in much

922
unexpressed rage. They are the product of a severely dysfunctional and
wrong-making family.

FIFTH THORACIC/SIXTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Magical misery tour.” They are extremely afraid of feelings and of the
future. Their experience is that things just go from bad to worse, and that it
is dangerous out there and in here. So they do an “ostrich” approach to
things that results in their having to be fearfully alert for the unpredictable
awfuls that are sure to come at all times. Their family was highly reality-
avoidant and dysfunctional.

SIXTH THORACIC/SEVENTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Balled up in pain.” They have no trust of the Universe, and they feel that
“love is a poison apple.” The result is a completely self-contained “sealed
unit” who cuts themselves off from contact with the world, with the result
they have a great deal of pain that they just have to live with. Their family
was thoroughly untrustworthy, self-involved and dysfunctional.

SEVENTH THORACIC/EIGHTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Vast wasteland.” Their experience is that no one can be trusted enough to

be vulnerable, and that there is nothing out there for them because they
don’t deserve any better anyway. Their family was intensely self-serving
and shame-inducing.

EIGHTH THORACIC/NINTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“But not for me...” They feel completely cut off from all positivity, and that
they are utterly powerless to do anything about it. Their experience is that
the world is populated with “moral cretins” who victimize them. They feel
absolutely bereft of anything of any value, with a good deal of suppressed
rage about that. It is the result of an abusive and blame-throwing family.

NINTH THORACIC/TENTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

923
“Suffering succotash!” They are convinced that they can do nothing to
make anything work or to prevent their suffering, so they are into a blame-
throwing and victim-tripping mode of operation.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional, disempowering family

who systematically imposed and induced suffering as they engaged in
continuous accountability-avoidance, attributing and blame-throwing.

TENTH THORACIC/ELEVENTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Pissed-off passivity.” They have the foundational assumption they don’t

deserve anything positive in their life, and that they are powerless to do
anything to make anything happen anyway. So they are resentfully resigned
to a negative experience of life. They are the product of a blame-throwing
dysfunctional family.

ELEVENTH THORACIC/TWELTH THORACIC DISC (Middle back)

“Worthless turd.” They are convinced that they are “unfit for human
consumption,” and that “love is a poison apple.” So they systematically
prevent and avoid loving relationships, while they “wait for rigor mortis.”
They are the product of a severely rejecting and pessimistic family.

TWELTH THORACIC/FIRST LUMBAR DISC (Middle back)

“Outcast on a desert island.” They feel that they deserve ostracism and
deprivation, and while they feel profound pain over their situation, they
don’t trust or believe in themselves or others enough to allow anything else
to happen. They come from a deeply love-distrust-inducing family.

FIRST LUMBAR/SECOND LUMBAR DISC (Lower back)

“Bitter pill.” They feel they have no choice but to “sit there and take it,”
with regard to having to accept the painful and alienated lifestyle they are
living. It is the product of significant early deprivation, and of a “dead end”
family system.

SECOND LUMBAR/THIRD LUMBAR DISC (Lower back)

924
“Screwed, Jewed and tattooed.” They feel they have been in effect “raped
by God,” and that they can trust nothing and no one as a result. They also
feel that it is their “just desserts,” and that they can therefore do nothing
about it. Their family felt utterly powerless and unable to do anything about
anything.

THIRD LUMBAR/FOURTH LUMBAR DISC (Lower back)

“Up a creek without a paddle.” They feel completely devastated in their

ability to have success in any sphere of life, and at base, they feel they
deserve no better. They were emotionally and/or physically sexually abused
and systematically confidence-and competence-undermined by a severely
possessive dysfunctional family.

FOURTH LUMBAR/FIFTH LUMBAR DISC (Lower back)

“Perpetual loser.” They feel as though they don’t have the right to positivity
of any kind, and they don’t have what it takes to make it. This makes for a
dreary, weary lifestyle that they deeply resent. It is the result of a possessive
and punitive family.

FIFTH LUMBAR/SACRUM DISC (Lower back)

“Violation-rage.” They feel seduced and attacked by the Universe, and that
it is their “evilness” and “worthlessness” that is the cause of it all. They are
therefore furiously but helplessly rageful about their whole situation. They
are the product of seductive-destructive parenting.

SACRUM/COCCYX DISC (Pelvis/tail bone)

“Pain-blame.” They have a great deal of sexual guilt and survival-anxiety in

what feels like a “lose-lose life” that they feel that they somehow deserve.
They were seductive-destructively and shame-inducingly parented by their
sex-ploitative and worth-devastating family.

SLIPPED DISC (Ill-moved platelet between the vertebrae)

925
“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They feel a great deal of pressure, and that they are
completely unsupported by life. They are lost in indecision, in the face of
feeling overwhelmed and alone in the world. They feel they are being asked
to be more than they are, or to do more than they can handle -- that they
have to live up to something beyond their capabilities.

They are full of cope-ability-anxiety and self-disgust for being the way they
are. The result is that they are rather intensely indecisive and “waffling” in
their functioning. They are the product of a highly unsupportive and wrong-
making family. (See the particular disc(s) involved for more information)

SPINAL FLUID PROBLEMS

“Alone on their own.” They are the product of a significantly dysfunctional

family who did not respond to their needs, or in which they were forced to
take over the meeting of their own needs and those of the family because no
one else would.

The result is that they are a “sealed unit” who feels that they have to do
everything themselves. They have a good deal of resentment-rage about
that, and it is now affecting the biochemistry of their nervous system.

*************************************

“Fixated rigidity.” They are proving to be unable to re-program the

computer of the mind, with a resulting pessimistic depression and nihilistic
“worry wart” pattern. As a result, there is now a major difficulty with the
chemical communication system in their “bio-computer.”

Either their belief systems or the “Executive Officer” or both are in effect
locked in a rigid retaining of the past pattern. They are being unable to
revise their views of things. There is a profound inner conflict within the
operational ego and/or between the desires and intentions of the personality
and the individual’s perception of their unfolding destiny. It is the result of
highly rigid rearing in their childhood.

*************************************

926
“God is Al Capone!” They have developed an abiding distrust of the
Universe and a relational issue with the “Source.”

They feel drained and over-demanded, like they have been abandoned by
the “Home Office” (All that Is). They feel that there are serious conflicts
between their personal goals and the Divine Intent; they are very worried
and anxious.

This developed as a result of a family history in which a lot didn’t make

sense, and yet it was justified as being “God’s Will” or the equivalent. (See
EXCESSIVE SPINAL FLUID)

SPINAL INJURY (See SPINAL CORD PROBLEMS)

SPINAL MENINGITIS (Inflammation of the brain and/or spinal cord

lining) [See MENINGITIS]

SPINE PROBLEMS

“Insufficiency feelings.” They feel basically outclassed and overwhelmed

by life’s requireme nts. They feel inferior, and they are shyly socially
avoidant as a result. They lack confidence, and this operates in a self-
fulfilling prophecy manner.

They were placed in positions of responsibility and requirement that were

beyond their level of development. Their family reacted with rage, blame,
accusations and denigration/undermining of their capacity to cope.

*************************************

“Take it and shove it!” They are refusing to flow with the support that life
provides them, as well as rejecting the spiritual connection. They are
convinced that the resources the Universe provides them are irrelevant,
“poison apples,” potential betrayals, or nothing but requirements,
responsibilities and restrictions.

It results in a rigid inflexibility, pridefulness, and inability to support the life

process. It is the outcome of a primitive, rejecting, exploitative and

927
untrustworthy dysfunctional family.

Each vertebrate has more specific psychological meanings associated with

problems around that vertebrate. These are listed below:

FIRST CERVICAL (Top of the Neck) VERTEBRA -- (The “Atlas”)

“Not good enough.” They are not able to experience God’s support and the
Divine Intellect input. They are coming from fear, confusion and endless
inner chatter. They are in effect running from life, in a “What will the
neighbors think?” ostracism-paranoia and fear of failure arising from a
strong feeling of not being worthy and sufficient to the cause.

It arose from an “associate parent” or “role-reversed” experience in which

they were expected to perform to perfection in order to receive any love and
validation at all.

SECOND CERVICAL (Neck) VERTEBRA -- (The “Axis”)

“I don’ wanna know!” There is an inhibition of the ability to develop their

breadth of understanding and comprehension -- a rejection of wisdom. They
are doing a denial-dominated refusal to know or understand.

It feels very dangerous to them to take a stand and make a decision, and
they are out of balance with life. They are intensely resentful and full of
blame, and they want nothing to do with the spiritual realm.

It is the result of an intensely denial-dominated dysfunctional family who

exploded and “blew apart at the seams” if the individual noted or expressed
any patterns, or if they shared any understanding (which requires
accountability, responsibility and integrity -- none of which the family
could manifest).

THIRD CERVICAL VERTEBRA (Neck)

“Serve-aholic frenzy.” They have a damaged capacity to perceive spiritual

Truth as a means of self-guidance. Instead, they accept blame for others,
they bite off more than they can chew, and they grind themselves down in a

928
“co-dependent runaway.” They are guilt-dominated, atonement-seeking,
over-responsible, self-denigrating, fearful of making the wrong decision,
and feeling in over their head.

It arose out of their being systematically shame-induced, accused and

blamed, on the one hand, and out of their being exploited, depended upon
and scapegoated, on the other, in their dysfunctional family.

FOURTH CERVICAL VERTEBRA (Neck)

“Bitter joylessness.” They have difficulty seeing or knowing the inner

essence or truth of things, as a function of losing contact with their Higher
Self. They feel lost in a “magical misery tour,” and they feel guilty for
everything that goes wrong, as if they were somehow responsible and
accountable for it.

They are therefore systematically suppressing themselves, and they are

stuffing their feelings. They are unable to allow themselves anything and as
a result, there are a lot of bottled up feelings, stuffed tears, and repressed
rages. The net effect is a resigned resentment over their squelched
condition.

They are the product of a highly repressive and blame-throwing family in

which they were held accountable for all negative events, as if they had the
power to control things magically.

It is the result of their being at a higher state of development than the family
in one way or another, so they turned to the individual for care-taking, and
then they turned to them in blame when the subconsciously expected
perfection of experience was not forthcoming.

FIFTH CERVICAL VERTEBRA (Neck)

“Self-distrust.” They have lost the capacity for “grokking” (perceiving the
full nature and import of things in one glance), for getting the whole
concept at once, for intuition, and for full comprehension.

929
As a result, they fear making mistakes, and their communication tends to be
partial. They then developed a fear of ridicule and self-expression, and they
can’t believe they have any good to them. They are constantly trying to
anticipate and control everything, with the result they are continuously
over-burdened.

They are the product of a primitive, pragmatic and/or concrete-minded

family who were distrusting and disgusted with non-sensory inputs or
sources.

They were subjected to derision or degradation when they shared their

“hits” and their hunches from their inherent highly developed intuitive
capability.

SIXTH CERVICAL VERTEBRA (Neck)

“Walking cerebrum.” They are taking a hyper-rational approach to things,

with no spiritual essence or connection involved. They try to handle
everything with reason, rationality and logical problem-solving. They are
afraid of feelings and unpredictability, spontaneity and flow.

They therefore feel heavily burdened and overloaded, as they try to “fix”
others. They are highly inflexible, rigid and resistive to influence or change.
They feel that they must have “hands on” control of everything, and that
everything must be done their rational, logical way.

It comes from their having been in a dysfunctional family that was either
emotional-commotional or chaotic, so that they decided never to have to
deal with that sort of mess again, or it was a hot-bed of “walking
cerebrums.”

In either case, they decided to never let things get out of control, and to
always make sure that everything makes perfectly logical sense.

SEVENTH CERVICAL VERTEBRA (Neck)

“Cosmic abandonment.” They have lost the ability to be in touch with the
“Home Office” (All that Is) and the associated capacity for abundance,

930
bounty and beauty. They experience nothing to appreciate and be grateful
for, and they therefore feel abandoned or rejected by God.

They feel they have no right to be themselves or reach out for resources
because they can’t trust others or the Universe, and because they somehow
have done something, become something, or is something that doesn’t
deserve God’s love and abundance.

They are therefore very angry about their situation of deprivation, an anger
greatly compounded by their confusion as to exactly why they are in this
predicament. In essence, they feel resentfully helpless. They are the product
of a dysfunctional and blame-throwing family in which nothing ever
worked or made much sense.

FIRST THORACIC VERTEBRA (Upper Back)

“Going down.” They are unable to keep their faith and hope alive, and they
therefore are giving up in despair and resignation. They have a real fear of
life, and they feel it is too much to cope with. They can’t handle it, and they
are closing off from life.

This came about as a result of their being made to feel responsible for the
care and maintenance of a severely dysfunctional family. When it became
apparent that they were in over their head, they became demoralized and
immobilized.

SECOND THORACIC VERTEBRA (Upper Back)

“Closed-off heart.” They have had to shut down their “heart center,” due to
fear, pain and hurt. They are unwilling to feel or be vulnerable, much less to
connect and merge. They are deeply distrusting of the Universe and of other
people, and to them, “love is a poison apple.” They have no self-love and
no inner peace. It is the outcome of a highly untrustworthy and attacking
dysfunctional family.

THIRD THORACIC VERTEBRA (Upper Back)

931
“Grit and bear it.” They are suffering from inner chaos and deep, old hurts.
They are unable to communicate about these or anything else, out of a lack
of forgiveness of self and others. They are very blame-frame oriented, and
their basic feeling is “You asked for it, asshole!”

They are convinced that they have to “just sit there and take it.” And that, in
turn, generates a great deal of inner turmoil that is a combination of outrage,
despair, fear, guilt, shame and confusion. They come from a severely
blaming and judgmental family, and the repeated message was, “You made
your bed. Now lie in it!”

FOURTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Bitter and blaming.” They don’t have the ability to have fun, to laugh, to
feel joy and elation, to have light in their lives, and to have a sense of
humor. They are instead unforgiving, condemning, and needing to make
others wrong.

There experience is, “There is no joy in Bloodville” and “Someone is to

blame, here and it sure as hell isn’t ME!” Needless to say, they are just
doing unto others what was done unto them.

FIFTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Feeling-avoidant.” They are totally terrified of their emotions and those of

others, out of a fear that all hell will break loose if they ever come in
contact with feelings. They systematically refuse to process their emotions,
and they do all they can to not come in contact with them in others. They
are therefore full of dammed-up feelings and a resulting rage. It is the result
of an extremely feeling-suppressing and reality-avoiding dysfunctional
family.

SIXTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Chronic agitation.” They are in a constant state of worry and fear of the
future. They have no trust in the process of life, and they have the feeling it
is their own fault, that they don’t deserve to have things go right for them.

932
So they are forever vigilant and on guard, which only serves as a continual
“reminder” that they “don’t deserve to love themselves.” They therefore
don’t want to have any awareness of or commerce with the negative
emotions, and so they “stuff” them. All of this generates a real anger at life.

They come from a reality-avoiding dysfunctional family who systematically

shoved their “unacceptable” feelings into the shadow, and who slid the
unpleasant realities of life under the rug. The result was an experienced
chaos and “magical misery tour,” in which they never knew when the next
piece of excrement would come off the wall, just that it would.

SEVENTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Love is a poison apple.” They have never been able to develop the
capacity for agape, -- the ability to have selfless affection, to just love and
want the loved one to be happy, with no requirements and no desires. They
are convinced that love is simply not to be trusted.

They therefore refuse to enjoy, and instead they store pain continuously.
They have put up a “psychic deflector shield,” and they are shriveling up
into a large ball of pain. Their family was extremely self-serving and slyly
manipulative in a very untrustworthy and untouchable manner. So they just
shut down and shut up.

EIGHTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Non-deservingness feelings.” They are convinced that they are a “failure”

and a “fraud,” and that they have not “earned the right” to the good things
in life. They won’t let love, joy and abundance in, and they are
systematically success-avoidant.

They feel that “God will kill me!” if they have success or quality of life.
They feel inherently undeserving of anything positive because of something
they did, became, or are, and they therefore expect (and bottom line want)
nothing but failure.

They hope that by determinedly deflecting any positives in their life, they
will avoid being “spiritually annihilated” for having what they “have no

933
right to have,” and they will simultaneously thereby earn “atonement
points” to compensate to “balance out” their “karmic indebtedness.” They
come from a heavily blame-throwing and shame-and guilt-inducing
dysfunctional family.

NINTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Blame-throwing.” They feel powerless in a victimizing Universe, and they

feel let down by life. They feel that it is other people’s fault, and they are
forever looking for whom to blame. Their experience is that they have no
capability or culpability in regard to creating their own life, and they are a
first class “victim-tripper.”

They are the product of a “sado-masochistic minuet” family system. That is,
it was a “pseudo-sadist” and a “masked sadist” situation, where nothing was
as it seemed. The result was that they found they were able to fill the
“victim” role, and they are stuck in it now.

TENTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Woe is me!” They refuse to take charge of their life or their environment.
They would rather be a victim and take the position, “It’s your fault!” Their
basic feeling is that they don’t deserve anything positive, so they are
“pulling coals out of the fire” by blame-throwing.

It is a function of their being in an accountability-and responsibility-

avoidant dysfunctional family in which everyone points the finger of blame
at someone else for the “shitty messes” they were wallowing in.

ELEVENTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

“Intimacy-avoidant.” They have a very low self-image and a high self-

rejection. They are convinced that they can never make it in a relationship,
and they are commitment-avoidant and fearful of relationships as a result.
They were systematically told they were unlovable and “unfit for human
consumption” by their highly rejecting family.

TWELFTH THORACIC VERTEBRA (Middle Back)

934
“Hiding in the cave.” They are convinced that “love is a poison apple” and
that joy is indigestible. They are profoundly insecure and fearful of love,
and they are unable to assimilate any form of nourishment.

They are in effect, disowning their right to live, and they have “hunkered
down in the bunker” to “wait out the siege” until “their number comes up.”
It all comes down to believing they deserve and can expect no better out of
life. That, in turn, came from a family who lived in a similar manner.

FIRST LUMBAR VERTEBRA (Lower Back)

“Alone and lonely.” They have the feeling that there is no support or love in
the Universe for them, in a strong sense of insecurity and lack of resources.
They are crying for love, and yet at the same time they have the desperate
need to be isolated and bereft.

Their experience is they can’t count on anyone or anything, and that they
“deserve” this being “cast on a desert island” for something they did,
became or are. Their relationship to their situation is one of ambivalent
“atonement.” It is the result of poor early bonding and significant early
deprivation.

SECOND LUMBAR VERTEBRA (Lower Back)

“In it for life.” They are stuck in childhood pain, and they see no way out.
They have a distorted sense of loyalty and betrayal-paranoia about ever
living their own life or about having a quality of life that goes beyond that
of their parents.

They are the product of powerless-feeling parents who felt trapped in a

“dead-end” lifestyle, and who passed on this sense of being unable to break
free of their imprinting and circumstances. Their family also
subconsciously conveyed that they needed them to stay and take care of
them, and certainly not to have better than they -- the ultimate bitter pill.

THIRD LUMBAR VERTEBRA (Lower Back)

935
“Trapped in the past.” They were the victim of emotional and/or physical
sexual abuse, and they are full of guilt and self-hatred as a result. They feel
totally unsafe in the world, and that they can trust no one, because it felt
like God raped them. They have profound sexual shame and self-revulsion.

Their abuse occurred so early that they took it to be their “just desserts.” It
also had the effect of generating a deep distrust of the Universe, due to the
confusion of the “Home Office” (All that Is) with the parents at that early
an age, so that they fully expect the Universe to screw them again.

FOURTH LUMBAR VERTEBRA (Lower Back)

“You belong to us!” They feel powerless and unable to make it in intimacy,
sexuality, financial security and career. They feel that they haven’t got what
it takes to be a mature and empowered individual. They also feel that they
have no right to expect success or love in life. They fear failure and the
stakes of taking responsibility in the realm of career.

It all comes out of a strong “keep ‘em around the old homestead”
competence-and confidence-undermining possessive parenting. The
message was, “You know better than to ever think that you could make it
out there!”

FIFTH LUMBAR VERTEBRA (Lower Back)

“Profound sense of non-deservingness.” They have a severe problem

wanting, asking for, and accepting any form of joy and pleasure. They are
very insecure about their worth and worthiness, and they have a lot of
difficulty in communicating because of it. This all leads to a great deal of
frustration and resentment-rage about their dreary and joyless, isolated and
alienated, and uncertain/insecure experience of life.

They were systematically confidence-and competence-undermined while

simultaneously being shame-induced and worth-anxiety-activated by their
self-serving and subterraneanly sabotaging dysfunctional family.

SACRUM PROBLEMS (Spinal Cord/Pelvis Connection)

936
“Sexual shame.” They are suffering from sexual guilt and shame induced by
a sex-ploitative “tantalizing tarantula” -- “seductive-destructive” -- “seduce-
slap” parenting pattern. They feel utterly powerless to do anything about
their situation, and at the same time, they are enraged about how they were
treated. They have a way of hanging on to old, stubborn anger.

They were made to feel “evil” for having sexual feelings, and at the same
time, they were systematically stimulated by the parents and made wrong
for responding and for not responding, so they were in a “lose-lose”
situation.

COCCYX PROBLEMS (“Tail Bone”)

“Putting their tail between their legs.” They are being out of balance with
themselves, and they are holding on to self-blame for old pain. They are
manifesting compulsive conservatism and hyper-caution run by survival-
anxiety.

There is an insufficient amount of self-love and a sense of not deserving to

have safety and security. There is also considerable sexual shame. They are
engaged in self-protective capitulation and sexual guilt.

They are survival-oriented and security-seeking, and they feel that they
don’t have the right to assert on behalf of themselves because they “don’t
deserve it.” All of this arose in an oppressive family in which there was a
large amount of blame and shame-induction, particularly around sexual
issues, while it was at the same time intensely sex-ploitative. There was
also a considerable amount of generalized survival-insecurity.

ANKYLOSING SPONDYLITIS (Debilitating disease caused by stiffening

of the spine)

“Nobody cares.” They are manifesting a profound feeling that they are
totally alone on their own. The experience is there never was any
foundation to build on. They feel abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that
Is), and they feel that there is nothing out there to sustain them.

937
So they have become their own “pillar of strength.” They refuse to accept
the support that life provides them. They feel that available resources are
irrelevant, “poison apples,” potential betrayals, or nothing but requirements,
responsibilities and restrictions. It results in a total self-containment
lifestyle and a stiff-backed rigid inflexibility.

They are the product of a primitive, rejecting, exploitative and

untrustworthy dysfunctional family, with a resulting but unacknowledged
emotional starvation and despairing desperation.

EXOSTOSIS (Nerve irritation caused by over-growth of bone on the spine)

“Nobody cares.” They have a profound feeling that they are totally alone on
their own. The experience is that there never was any foundation to build
on. They feel abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that Is) and that there is
nothing out there to sustain them.

So they become their own “pillar of strength.” They refuse to accept the
support that life provides them. They feel that the available resources are
irrelevant, “poison apples,” potential betrayals, or nothing but requirements,
responsibilities and restrictions. It results in a rigid inflexibility.

They are the product of a primitive, rejecting, exploitative untrustworthy

dysfunctional family, with a resulting emotional starvation and despairing
desperation.

SPINAL FUSION (Spinal vertebrae grow together, causing stiffening of the

spine. Or it has been done surgically as a desperate measure.)

“Nobody cares.” They are manifesting a profound feeling that they are
totally alone on their own. The experience is that there never was any
foundation to build on. They feel abandoned by the “Home Office” (All that
Is), and they feel that there is nothing out there to sustain them.

So they have become their own “pillar of strength.” They refuse to accept
the support that life provides them. They feel that available resources are
irrelevant, “poison apples,” potential betrayals, or nothing but requirements,

938
responsibilities and restrictions. It results in a total self-containment
lifestyle and a stiff-backed rigid inflexibility.

They are the product of a primitive, rejecting, exploitative and

untrustworthy dysfunctional family, with a resulting but unacknowledged
emotional starvation and despairing desperation.

SPINE “POPPING”

“Conservative resistance.” They are afraid of change and new situations,

and they hang back and engage in newness-avoidance activities. It comes
from growing up in a repressive, fearful, and/or conservative family.

STENOSIS (Narrowing of the spinal column, due to calcium deposits)

“Hardening of the attitudes.” They are rigidly adhering to standards and

patterns that are unrealistic, out-dated and self-defeating. They are refusing
to flow with the support that life provides them, and they are rejecting their
spiritual connection.

They are convinced the resources the Universe provides them are irrelevant,
“poison apples,” potential betrayals, or nothing but requirements,
responsibilities and restrictions. They feel they have to rely solely on
themselves to provide themselves a sense of security in a highly insecurity-
generating world.

They feel that they are in over their head, and that they have to handle it by
strictly adhering to the “tried and true.” It results in a rigid inflexibility and
inability to support the life process.

It is the result of a primitive, rejecting, exploitative and untrustworthy

dysfunctional family, of a highly regimented and perfectionistic family,
and/or of having to serve as the “sane one,” the “Rock of Gibraltar” in a
severely dysfunctional and conservative family.

VERTEBRAL SUBLUXATION (Displaced vertebrate)

939
“Jerked around.” They feel being excessively demanded of, restricted or
controlled by their environment, in the form of feeling non-supported,
exploited and/or abused. They are having difficulty meeting the
requirements made of them, due to the lack of the necessary resolve and
reserves or to a sense of being unfairly imposed upon. It is a pattern that
started in their under-requiring, competence-and confidence-undermining
and/or dysfunctionally demanding family.

SPLEEN PROBLEMS

“Morose rumination.” There is a lack of capacity to connect with soul love,

resulting in excessive worry and in being obsessed with things. They have a
considerable amount of frustration, impatience, over-attachment,
possessiveness, anger and antagonism.

All of this plays out in considerable negativism about potential catastrophic

outcomes. It also leads to their being critical, skeptical, irritable, and
indifferent about others. They are quite unhappy and emotionally
unbalanced, and there is a considerable tendency to engage in complaining
and “sympathy-sop” behaviors. They are the product of a grudge-nursing
and cynically nihilistic dysfunctional family who take an injustice-nurturing
and negativistic approach.

*************************************

“Unfit for human consumption.” They feel very unsafe in the world because
bottom line, they feel that don’t deserve to be safe or nurtured. They have
little or no self-love, and they don’t experience other’s love.

They are abandonment-anxious and alienation-avoidant and they are highly

insecure. They feel universally rejected, and they are very agitated and
depressed. They have ended up feeling this is their lot in life, and that they
somehow had to handle it, which has resulted in a pattern of constant
predictions of and preparation for disaster, with the consequent anger, fear
and despair.

This whole pattern started in an unpredictable and unstable dysfunctional

family in which there were constant difficulties

940
“SPLINTERS”

“Boundary problems.” They are letting things “get under their skin,” and
they feel “raped” at some level and to some degree. They are encountering
self-inflicted “foreign elements” that reflect a feeling of their being invaded
and attacked by unwanted outside or inner influences. These “invading
influences” are incorporated representatives of the original intrusively
violating and accusatory family. (See the areas affected for more
information)

SPLIT HAIR ENDS

“I just don’t have it.” They are engaged in self-rejection and a sense of not
being “good enough.” The feeling is that they somehow lack the essential
qualities that make for worthiness and attractiveness. It stems from “never
good enough” parenting.

SPRAINS (Stretched or torn ligaments)

“Oh no I don’t!” They do not want to move in a certain direction in life.

They distrust the Universe, and they have catastrophic expectations
regarding the outcome of this issue. It has not gone well for them in the
past, and they don’t expect any better now. It is a function of very early and
continued lack of support and nurturance.

************************************

“Pissed off.” They are experiencing strong resistance and anger about life.
They have always had to handle things more or less alone on their own
from the very beginning, and they are therefore very incensed at having the
Universe “cattle chute” them into this dilemma.

They have the “delusion of indifference,” the feeling that nobody gives a
damn and that they have to take care of everything themselves. They are the
product of a neglectful and enraging dysfunctional family. (See the affected
area(s) for more information)

SPRUE (Inability to absorb nutrients)

941
“Cosmic ejectee.” There is a simultaneous profound self-rejection and
distrust of the Universe. Their experience is they are so unacceptable that
anything the environment has to offer is going to be “poison apples,”
because that’s all they can expect.

It is the result either of some sort of karmic issue, of extreme rejection and
accusation by their family, or both.

“SQUINTING” (Chronic)

“Awareness-avoidance.” They are at crossed purposes because they are

afraid to see what’s out there. It’s as if it is so horrifying that they would
rather “feel their way along” than to encounter the full truth of the situation.

It is a kind of “Medusa-paranoia” reaction (in which they are afraid of what

they would encounter in a mirror). They co-opted the denial-dominated and
superficiality-fixated strategy of their family, and they adopted the
“squinting” strategy or “crossed eye complex” to avoid seeing and being
seen seeing.

By doing so, they took on a “protective coloration camouflage” while

simultaneously calibrating how much of the truth of the situation they could
handle at a time. However, it has cost them dearly because they do have
difficulty seeing what’s going on, and that has led to a great many problems
in their life.

In effect, they have a nasty habit of getting in their own way in a success-
deflecting manner, and that tends to greatly reinforce their fear of the world.
It started in a truly gothically horrific dysfunctional family in which a child
seeing the whole scene would indeed be overwhelmed and driven insane or
to the grave.

“STABBING HEART PAINS”

“I’m late! I’m late!” They are a workaholic performance-addict seeking

approval from withholding and disapproving perfectionistic standins for
their similar parents. For them, ultimate failure and final irrevocable
rejection are always just a breath away.

942
They are super time-urgent and schedule-fixated, and they are always
impatient and in a hurry (to accomplish the “final victory,” the “Golden
Orb”- winning achievement). They also have this “March Hare” worry that
if they don’t cover virtually all the bases in time, all will be lost. Their
family was always fending off disaster. (See HEART PROBLEMS)

STAB WOUND

“Boundary violation.” They are prone to be the target of unsolicited attacks

from the environment, and this time, it took the form of a total invasion of
their person. It arises from being subjected to such invasions and abrasions
all through their childhood.

***********************************

“Bushwhacked.” They operate in a rather highly indirect and subtly event-

orchestrating manner, often with some form of “get-back” motivation. As a
result, they tend to elicit broadside attacks or sudden assaults from
unexpected quarters. It is a pattern that started in a similar family
environment.

STABBED TO DEATH

“Ultimate violation.” They had reached the end of their rope on putting up
with the violations that had been the “warp and woof” of their life, and the
environment provided the out-route. They were the product of a severely
violating and subtly or overtly violent family.

******************************

“Final reckoning.” They pushed the environment too far this time, and they
have now received the ultimate “get-back.” They grew up in a mutually
abusive and violating family, and they ended up becoming a “river-pusher”
who was always “paying the price” for their invasive and boundary-
violating behavior.

*******************************

943
“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too. (See KNIFE WOUND;
WOUND)

STAPH INFECTION; STAPHYLOCOCCUS (Picked up in hospitals,

clinics, etc.)

“Parental violation -- repeated.” They are manifesting their underlying

unconscious expectations of being betrayed and invaded that arose from a
childhood experience of being repeatedly violated by their dysfunctional
and self-serving family.

Their experience is that they are still feeling the effects destructive and self-
sabotage-inducing “implants” from their invasive family. They also find
that the environment has a way of reproducing their home environment --
complete with all the destructive invasions and violations.

STARVATION

“Experience-expanding.” They are a very young soul who has chosen to

have this process for its learning results.

***********************************

“Self-deprivation.” They are in effect attempting to make up for whatever it

was that led to severe emotional deprivation and rejection as a child. Their
experience is that they are, did or are doing something that deserves this
“just desserts” outcome, and they are also prone to engage in various
“atonement” strategies. They are the product of a severely accusatory,
blame-throwing, rejecting and judgmental family.

***********************************

“Karma-payback.” They were ruthlessly selfish and life resources-depriving

in a preceding lifetime. (See ANOREXIA)

944
STARVED TO DEATH

“Ultimate atonement.” They were unconsciously convinced that they didn’t

deserve to take up resources or to have their needs met, and they finally
came to the conclusion that it was time to “conclude the story.” It was the
result of intense early deprivation and/or rejection.

****************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

STATIC ELECTRICITY SHOCKS (Frequent)

“Oh no you don’t!” They are experiencing “warning slaps” around “daring”
to seek to impact or to commence manifesting their personal potency and/or
cosmic connection capabilities. They received intensely possessive “keep
‘em around the old homestead” parenting.

“STEALTH VIRUS” (A parasite that comes in below the threshold of the

immune system like a stealth bomber flying under the radar. It leads to
exhaustion and irritability that can end up in glandular problems,
meningitis, and immune system breakdown.)

“Pooped out.” They are pushing beyond their limits, and they have a dread-
driven fear of not being good enough, leading to an exhaustion reaction.
They were draining all of their inner support, and a stress virus took hold.

They are “running on empty,” due to overwhelm and deprivation-

exhaustion. They have lost their sense of purposes and direction, of the
desire for life, and the wind has gone out of their sails. They have
developed a deep fear of life, of taking responsibility, and of coping with
any further demands. The illness can become a safe place to be, a retreat
from confrontation and action. They are the product of perfectionistic
parenting.

945
 *************************************

“Crushed talent.” They are undergoing unfulfilled giftedness-suppression,

resulting in severe despair-rage, along with emotional commotional
episodes of almost psychotic-seeming proportions, and utter exhaustion
comparable to Epstein-Barr. They also find themselves being “used” by
their gifts, in the form of uncontrollable outbursts and breakouts of their
talents in a non-functional and often highly detrimental manner.

They also go into experiences and expressions of intense mental and

emotional distress and distortion that are extremely alarming and alienating.
They feel possessed by these explosions, and they become quite “run amok-
anxious” about it. In addition, they often are possessed by their family, by
institutions and/or by spouse figures.

They are the product of extremely possessive and oppressive parenting that
got started intrauterine. They were forbidden and prevented from doing
their own thing or from developing their own capabilities, identity and
destiny. They were instead forced into playing out their parent(s) (usually
the father’s) unexpressed destiny.

*************************************

“I stink!” There is a programmed self-rejection that has resulted in a “belly

up” of the immune system. It in effect works against them, as if they were
allergic to themselves and the world. They were placed in the “family hoist”
position of over-responsibility, and they were targeted with the attributed
accountability for everything that went wrong in the family -- as if it was a
motivated let down betrayal or a personal failure on their part.

This came about as a function of their being a gifted child living in a

dysfunctional family who expected them to be able to handle all the
family’s problems. They played the “hero(ine)” role in the family, and they
turned into a workaholic -- achieve-aholic contribution-freak.

They became very accomplished and independent, with perfectionistic

standards around worth-earning arising from unpleasable parenting -- they
could never, ever measure up. They ended up validation-starved as a result.

946
 *************************************

“Hands on rescue efforts.” They have a huge control trip that doesn’t work
that arises because they have no sense of their personal worth or value.
There is a severe “family betrayal” delusion and a guilt-grabbing
propensity, due to their being told in effect that they caused World War II.

It is a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” syndrome where, due to their gifts, they

actually tried to “go for the gold ring” of healing their family. In the
meantime, the family was severely exploitative and betraying, as they
overwhelmingly expected of and over-utilized them.

No one taught them self-care or self-soothing in their first year of life. They
were expected to care for the parents instead. They therefore have no sense
of entitlement. There was little nurturance, compassion or protection in
infancy, which resulted in very heavy self-numbing and frantic-fanatic
efforting to “make up for what they have caused.” They were, in effect,
abandoned at an early age by expectations of perfection and miracles.

They operated in a chronic flight-fight system arousal in childhood, in a

context of continual rejection, blame-throwing, and impossible demands.
They are now collapsing, out of a sense of non-deservingness and from
having run out of inner resources to pull off the “rabbit in the hat” trick any
more.

*************************************

“Overwhelmed.” They are into a hapless-helpless-hopeless victimization

experience. There is an inability to self-nurture, self-appreciate and self-
soothe. As a result of all this, they can sometimes end up being care-
coercing of the environment, in a very belated attempt to get the
fundamental nurturing they never received.

The family was highly authoritarian, non-supportive and repressive-

suppressive from the beginning. Often there was also physical and sexual
abuse, along with the intense emotional abuse and deprivation.

947
They were subjected to highly conditional, demanding and self-immersed
parenting, and “there was no joy in Bloodville.” The whole pattern could be
summarized in the phrase, “It’s not allowed!”

STENOSIS (See SPINE PROBLEMS)

STERILITY

“In over their head.” They are experiencing great fear and resistance to the
process of life. There is a considerable amount of tension, anxiety,
emotional conflict and traumatic shock involved in their life history. They
are heavily into competence-anxiety, self-distrust and self-inhibition. It
arises from a “blame-throwing” dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Not this time around.” They don’t need to go through the parenting
experience, and they are therefore are unconsciously choosing not to sustain
the procreation process.

*************************************

“Cold-hearted.” It is a case of egotism, selfishness and dishonest feelings

being expressed in an ignorant manner. In effect, they don’t want to be a
parent for all the wrong reasons (or maybe for the right reasons, given who
they are).

They are hard, harsh, cold, judgmental, negative assumptive, angry and
blaming. They are manifesting a primitive manner of functioning learned in
a similar family.

*************************************

“Not time yet!” The child’s soul intends to come in, but the circumstances
are not appropriate at the moment, for whatever reason.

*************************************

948
“Are you kidding?!” They have had a long-standing pattern of monastic
celibacy in past lives, and they intend to continue the tradition.

*************************************

“Karma.” They have a past life history of severe abuse and even murder of
children. They are being required to work off that karma before they will be
allowed to parent again.

*************************************

“More than one way to skin a cat.” The parents are destined to express their
generativity in other ways that would prevent, derail or distort proper
parenting.

STERNUM PROBLEMS

“Vulnerability-avoidance.” They are closing off their “heart center” to avoid

any further hurt. They feel a strong need to protect themselves, and they
have put up an “invisible Plexiglas shield” around their heart area.

They were systematically subjected to betrayal, and they have also

consistently chosen to become involved in exploitative and emotionally
abusive relationships. As a result, they have built up a plate of armor around
their heart. It started in a dysfunctional and hurtful family of such a nature
that they concluded this is their “deserved lot in life.” (See CHEST
PROBLEMS)

“STIFFNESS” (Due to lactic acid accumulation)

“I’m all I’ve got!” They find they don’t know which way to turn, and they
are displaying rigid and stiff thinking, and they are taking an unbending
position. They feel unsafe in the world, and that they have to protect their
position.

They have had to fend for themselves from a very early age, and they are of
the conviction that “One strike and I’m out!” They are therefore highly self-

949
oriented, ungiving, and survivalist in their thinking. Hence, they feel
everything is riding on their every decision, move and position.

And indeed, that is pretty much what the situation was in their family,
where they were the “sane one” in a severely dysfunctional system. (See the
areas affected for more information)

STIGMATA (Spontaneous fluid or blood flow from hands, feet, the side,
etc.)

“The real McCoy.” For reasons known only to the soul and the “Home
Office” (All that Is), they are serving as an emissary and messenger. This
situation is ascertainable by the nature of their functioning, which is
impeccable and divinely inspired, within the limits of human imperfection.

***************************************

“True believer.” They have a profound devotion to the spiritual life as all
that matters, resulting in an altered state of being that includes the
identification with the utter dedication to their higher purpose to such a
degree that “sympathetic symptoms” have appeared.

It came about as a function of their withdrawal from their severely and

intractably dysfunctional family into the “other realms.”

***************************************

“Trauma drama.” They have such passionate, literalistic and dramatic

dedication to an identity as a “persecuted saint” that they are able to
psycho-physiologically generate symbolic similarities. They are the product
of a denial-dominated and pathologically sex-ploitative family. (See
CONVERSION DISORDER)

STIGMATOSIS (See ULCERATED SPOTS ON THE SKIN)

“STING-ITCHES” [Sudden and extremely compelling] (See ITCHING)

STOMACH ACHE

950
“Catastrophic expectations.” They have a pronounced fear of what they feel
is a “dog eat dog” competitive world around them. They have a great need
to be loved, and they are a security-seeker of the first magnitude. They are
desperately working towards success in order to “earn” their love.

They have a fair amount of fearful anticipation of potential negative

consequences developing out of events that have happened or that could
devolve from decisions made that are setting events in motion.

They are the product of a rather strongly possessive family who take an “us
vs. the world” stance. They instilled in them a real fear of the world, along
with a “love-aholic” pattern generated by their utilization of their
ambivalence towards the individual as a control mechanism.

STOMACH ACHES IN CHILDREN

“What’s happening!?” Current events are frightening them. The feeling is

that their world is breaking up and/or that it is up to them to prevent
everything from going to hell in a breadbasket.

Their need for love is being severely threatened in their mind or in reality,
and they feel the need to earn their love-line by extra-ordinary efforts. This
is making them both fearful and angry, which they feel that they have to
suppress, lest it drive away their desperately needed “love-line.” They grew
up in a highly ambivalent and “conditionally loving” family.

STOMACH FLU

“Damned if I do, damned if I don’t.” They have a fear of attack from others
and taking life in fully. There is a feeling of lack of support and protection.
There is an insufficient involvement and interaction, an “among us but not
of us” -- “urban hermit” pattern.

They are also subject to conflict, confusion and susceptibility to suggestion,

especially from the “world of agreement” or the “group mind” or “statistical
proofs.”

951
Underneath is a buried rage and hatred for their being so alone, alien and
alienated. It comes from a family in which they “could do no right” as the
unrecognized and unacknowledged “family hoist” on whom everyone
depended, and whom no one supported, sustained or validated.

STOMACH PROBLEMS (Assimilation preparation)

“Oh my God!” They are facing an indigestible or nauseating reality in their

life. They are full of dread and fear of the future, and they are highly
insecure. They are worried, negativistic and decision-anxious, and they fear
new notions.

They feel over-burdened with responsibilities already, and they are highly
reluctant to take on new ideas and inputs for fear they will result in further
increases in restrictions, requirements and responsibilities.

They have an inability to assimilate experiences -- they can’t “stomach”

them. They have real trouble digesting ideas, and there is a real incapacity
to expand their consciousness and to integrate new information. They are
unable to comprehend, and they become confused and demoralized.

They were systematically undermined in their coping capability,

competence, and confidence by a highly possessive family who depended
on them extensively from early on.

**********************************

“Eating themselves away.” They have intense power issues and anger that
generate resentment, dislike and bitterness that blocks the digesting and
assimilating of experiences, as well as disrupting the ability to accept that
which the experiences teach.

They are consumed with anger, and they are highly condemning of other
people’s success. They are rejecting, over-discriminating, dichotomizing
and restricting their consciousness. There is much conflict between their
head and heart, between their thought and their feeling functions. They are
heavily into denial, repression, rationalism and overly mental evaluation.

952
They are displaying inflexible attitudes and systematic assimilation-
avoidance.

They have a pronounced male/female split, and they are intensely rejecting
of the energy and qualities of the other gender within themselves (the
“anima” or the “animus”). They are self-motivated to the extreme, and they
are counter-dependent in a reaction formation to unresolved dependency
needs and emotional conflicts.

They are full of hate and disharmony that profoundly affects their digestion
of both their physical and mental food. They were brought up in a very
closed system family who took a rejecting, condescending and elitist
attitude towards others, and who treated them as the “intimate enemy.”

***********************************

“Sustenance-rejecting.” They have an underlying self-rejection that leads

them to deflect nurturance, support and relevant acceptance. They have a
difficult time holding nourishment and manifesting a comfortable home,
financial security, and a happy personal life, due to severe guilt and shame
feelings.

They are unwilling to accept sustenance due to worth issues, and they feel
they shouldn’t be included in things. They are super-sensitive, highly
apprehensive, and they therefore are easily dominated. There is a huge
backlog of profoundly hurt feelings.

They are intensely suppressing their self-commitment and selfing in a

“shadow-shoving” phobic reaction that generates a repressed subconscious
super-selfishness. There is also a deep-seated sense of discouragement,
disappointment, dread, despair and depression. They are very weary and
tired, and they are rather immobilized and amotivational, out of feeling they
don’t deserve anything positive. It is the result of a severely shame-inducing
dysfunctional family.

GASTRITIS (Irritation of the stomach lining)

953
“Over-burdened.” They feel over-demanded of, exploited and prevented
from doing what they want to do with their life. They are afraid to refuse
the demands for fear of rejection or abandonment, so they grudgingly carry
out their imposed responsibilities. But they dearly wish they could express
their true feelings and selfhood.

It comes from having had their “love-line” contingent upon their

performing “up to snuff,” and upon their meeting their family’s needs first.

****************************

“Hanging fire.” They are laboring under the threat of some sort of pending
disaster. They have been operating with intense uncertainty about this and
other things for a very long time. There is a feeling of doom about the
whole thing.

They come from a severely dysfunctional family in which “things went

bump in the night” with often calamitous results continuously.

GASTRO-ENTERITIS (Inflammation of the stomach and intestinal lining)

“Self-devastation fears.” They have undergone a prolonged uncertainty

about how things are going to come out, along with a pronounced feeling of
doom and disaster in the making.

They have an inability to say “No” to demands, and they end up selling
themselves out. It is due to a fear of rejection and abandonment, with an
associated grief, despair and guilt and self-disapproval about the loss of
their self-values.

Their family was at best highly ambivalent towards them, and they
underwent a great deal of acceptance/rejection-anxiety producing
experiences.

********************************

“Doing the impossible with nothing.” They are a perfectionistic workaholic

who is trapped in inescapable overwhelming responsibilities. They feel that

954
they just have to absorb whatever they encounter or are required to do, and
it is seriously upsetting and irritating them. They deeply wish that they
could reject what is not good for them.

They are the product of perfectionistic, judgmental, wrong-making and

extremely demanding parents.

STOMACH CANCER

“Vengeance vendetta.” They are dedicated to the proposition that they are
going to get even for all that has happened to them. They are spiteful and
bitterly resentful, and they are full of malice, judgmental condemnation and
hatred. They are relentlessly unforgiving, and they are constantly scheming
and manipulating for sweet vengeance. They come from a ruthlessly vicious
family. (See CANCER)

STREP THROAT

“They’re talking about me!” They are being subjected to negative

evaluation, to being misjudged, to being unfairly criticized, and to being
self-righteously gossiped about. Or they are sure that this is the case. They
are full of accusation-hatred. This is an old, familiar pattern, as it happened
all the time in their family.

*************************************

“Grief-rage.” The sore throat represents a suppressed scream of

deprivation-frustration. They feel utterly cut off from other people and they
feel unable to express themselves. They feel a profound sense of
deprivation, and they have an intense sense of helplessness to do anything
about it.

They are holding in angry words in reaction to what is happening to them.

There is a deep resentment of their situation. The withheld expressions of
their feelings, needs and information, their refusal to communicate with
themselves or others the truth that needs to be told, is resulting in an
inflammation of the communication organ.

955
This all started in a family in which there was much suppression, secrecy
and subterranean sabotage, and anyone who spoke the truth was severely
punished or attacked.

*************************************

“Moral cretins!” They are being severely judgmental, hyper-critical and

intensely resentful of others. They are also being self-righteously gossipy
about them. There is an underlying guilt about all this that is showing up as
a rage-raw throat. This pattern of negative evaluations of others came out of
a wrong-making and contemptuous family.

“STRESS EFFECTS”

“I won’t accept this!” They are having a difficult time dealing with the
realities and events of their life. They wish it weren’t the way it is, and they
are resisting the situation intensely. Their body is going into overdrive and
overwhelm in reaction to all the negative feelings and reactions they have to
what is happening.

It is a pattern that started in their severely dysfunctional family, in which

nothing ever worked well, and in which whatever was, was unacceptable,
no matter what.

“STROKE” (Decreased blood flow to part of the brain usually, due to a

burst blood vessel in the brain)

“Serve-aholic.” They tend to become engaged in compulsive and co-

dependent compassion, and to become involved in taking on the problems
of the world in an “unsung hero(ine)” pattern. They then get burned out and
resentfully burned up about the lack of recognition and support in their
lives.

Now they have finally reached the point where they are feeling
overwhelmed with the requirements of life, and they are giving up. They
are in effect trying to put an end to it all.

956
It is the result of being the “family hoist” in a severely dysfunctional,
exploitative and self-immersed family.

************************************

“Intense bitterness.” They have a narrowed, constricted and compressed

flow of love energy in their life. It is the result of a subconscious death wish
that leads to their rejecting life at a deep level. They have a “No one cares”
attitude and an intense resistance to people and things.

They are rejecting life, and they would rather die than change. They are in
effect viciously violent towards themselves in their attitudes and in their
behavior. They are the product of an authoritarian, condemning and
intensely judgmental family.

“STUBBED TOE”

“Implication-freakouts.” They are experiencing conflicts between their

direction of development or movement and their inner desires or intentions.
They are having catastrophic expectations over the potential ramifications
of what is in process.

They grew up in a family in which things all too often went off into
“escalating disasters.” They are therefore reluctant to take things on or to
take the initiative.

“STUFFY NOSE”

“It’s happening again!” They are experiencing a misinterpretation or

emotional upset with the people who are close to them. The effect is a
feeling that too much is going on at once, and there is mental conflict that is
causing confusion.

They are prone to self-rejection and to a self-undervaluing feeling of having

no redeeming social significance. They were the “sane one” in their rather
emotional commotional dysfunctional family, and they ended up feeling
responsible for all the resulting unhappiness and interpersonal upheaval.

957
 *************************************

“Hapless/helpless.” It represents a form of existential denial and destiny-

avoidance, in a pattern of not setting a stable pattern in their life, not taking
the long view, and not seeing how their life is going and what’s not working
in some area of their life.

Their pronounced tendency is to hang on to old beliefs, and to feel “at

effect” rather than “at cause” in their life. There results mental disorder and
small hurts, with a feeling of being controlled by impersonal external
factors such as the weather or life circumstances. The emotional reaction to
all this is a suppressed anger, resentment and hostility.

They come from a dysfunctional family in which you never knew when the
next piece of excrement was going to come off the wall, just that it was
going to.

************************************

“Worthless turd.” They have real difficulty in recognizing significance,

meaningfulness and value. They have a significant self-worth problem. It
was generated by effective emotional neglect and non-acknowledgement
during late infancy and probably beyond. (See COLDS)

“STUPOR”

“Overload overwhelm.” They simply can’t stay with things any more
because it is just too much for them. Their circuits have been “fried” by the
situation, which in turn is an over-the-top -- “straw that broke the camel’s
back” eventuality.

They have been operating close to “max out” all along, due to a stupefying
dysfunctional family in which they had to be the “family hoist” rescuer and
disaster-deflector.

“STUTTERING”

958
“Error-terror.” They have a real fear of being clear about what they have to
say. There is an intense dread of making a mistake, along with severe
insecurity. They are intensely self-suppressing and lacking in self-
expression, due to a deeply anxious and failure-fearing pattern.

They have a deep desire to protest about their situation, but they are
terrified of the potential outcomes of doing so. They are, in effect, incapable
of expressing themselves or of sharing what is on their mind and in their
heart. They are extremely anxious around authority figures, and they are
desperate to please them and to meet their standards.

They were subjected to hovering perfectionistic parenting in which they

were not allowed to speak, to feel freely, or to cry, and in which very high
stakes “hung in the air” over their every utterance. The family was severely
dominating, authoritarian and controlling, with much criticizing and telling
them they were ignorant and that they didn’t know what they were saying,
or that they were saying it wrong.

“ST. VITUS’ DANCE” (Involuntary muscular actions)

“Support-preventing.” There have had a severe sense of deprivation and

degradation all their life. It results in a “self-fulfilling prophecy” effect of
driving away of those who might support and love them. It started in a
severely rejecting family, and they took it all personally, so that underlying
all of this is a basic assumption they and everybody else are no damned
good. (See HUNTINGTON’S CHOREA)

“STY” (Inflammation of the eyelid) (See EYELID PROBLEMS)

“SUDDEN DEATH DIET” SYNDROME (Severe death threat brought

about by extreme dieting that results in reduced size and abnormalities of
the functioning of the heart.)

“Just not good enough.” They experience something inherently

unacceptable, insufficient or unattractive about themselves. And they have
taken extreme measures to try to compensate for or correct it. This time,
however, their underlying self-rejection or even self-hatred has resulted in

959
the ultimate self-attack. It arises from severely conditionally accepting or
directly rejecting parenting.

SUDDEN INFANT DEATH SYNDROME (See “S.I.D.S.”)

SUFFOCATION

“Self-revulsion.” They are “choking to death” on their own guilt and shame.
They feel that they should be thoroughly punished or even destroyed for
their “sins.” It comes from a severely accusatory, blame-throwing,
moralistic and punitive family.

SUDDEN SUFFOCATION EXPERIENCES

“Refusing to grow up.” They are totally terrified of the process of life and
of the environment around them. They have a fearful distrusting of just
about everything, and they feel utterly unsafe in the world.

On top of which, the message in childhood was, “Don’t you dare ever grow
up and away or beyond our control!” They therefore got stuck in childhood,
afraid to take the world on its own terms.

SUFFOCATED TO DEATH

“Self-annihilation.” They in effect “strangled themselves death” with their

guilt and shame. They had had the feeling that they should be severely
disciplined or even terminated for their “evilness.”

They were convinced that there was something wrong with this picture --
and that was that they were still in it. It was the result of an extremely
rejecting, accusation-attributing, blame-throwing, moralistic and punitive
parenting pattern.

*********************************

“Shit happens.” Sometimes things just show up. It’s the result of the
“random generator,” which sets off events that are neither the result of the
Divine Intent nor of the play-outs of our will. The purpose is to

960
continuously challenge us with growth-generating events. It should be
noted in this regard that “shinola happens” too.

SUICIDE

“What’s the use?” They had come to the point where they lived in a very
simplistic, in effect “black and white” world in which there were only two
possibilities.

They were unable or refusing to see another way out or other potential
solutions to situations. They also felt utterly hopeless, unable to resolve
their problems, and totally unsafe in the world. In addition, they felt that
everyone would be better off with them gone.

It was the result of being cut off at every pass, and of in effect being “cattle-
chuted” into their family’s bleak and limited worldview and lifestyle as a
child.

SUNBURN

“Violated.” They have vulnerability-anxiety and boundary issues. The

feeling is that they are insufficiently protected from invasion, exploitation
and abuse by the environment at the present time. It is a pattern that arose
out of a family who did not respect their boundaries, experiences and needs,
due either to desperate dependency, dysfunctionality and/or to
destructiveness.

SUN SENSITIVITY

“Delicate constitution.” They were under-required and over-protected as a

child, and they are therefore ill-equipped to handle the demands of adult
responsibility. They are thoroughly hyper-vulnerable, accountability-
avoidant, and responsibility-deflecting.

“SUNSTROKE” (See “HEAT PROSTRATION”)

SWALLOWING DIFFICULTY

961
“Look before you leap.” They have an unwillingness to “swallow” things in
a “hook, line and sinker” manner. They are now having difficulty accepting
anything for fear of being “had” again. They learned in their dysfunctional
family not to take things at face value, and to “toe-test” so as to not get
taken in by what seems to be going down.

GETTING FOOD, PILLS, ETC., STUCK IN THEIR THROAT

“Wizard of Ought.” They tend to get caught up in their pictures of how

things should be, with the result that they are focused on desired outcomes,
or the next event or undertaking, as they try to do too much at once or too
fast, while not paying attention to the process of the moment.

They are prone to be not present in themselves and in the realities of now,
as they run their life out of their conceptions of how things ought to be. It is
a pattern that started in a judgmental and achieve-aholic family.

SWALLOWING REPEATEDLY

“Swallow-wallowing.” They are lost in fearfulness about being “caught in

the act.” They feel they are doing something wrong, and that they are going
to be discovered and given their “just punishment.” They were made to feel
“evil” and deserving of punishment for having wants, needs and desires as a
child, and it is now an obsessional pattern with them.

SWEATING EXCESSIVELY

“Hot and heavy.” They are intensely angry and rageful, and they are “all
burned up” and ready to attack. They come from a virulently, relentlessly
injustice-nurturing and angry family.

*************************************

“Sweating bullets.” They are releasing and experiencing great fear about
something that is happening or about to happen. Something has been set in
motion that is being evaluated, judged and then acted on, or that in some
other way, something is “in the works” that is scaring the hell out of them.
They come from a frighteningly dysfunctional family in which they could

962
do no right, and in which they could do little or nothing to make things
saner in any given situation.

*************************************

“Sweating it out.” They are clearing out deep-seated fears and hurts from
long ago by partially reliving the experiences that accompanied the
implanting of all the pain in the first place. The original experiences were
the product of a subtle and subterranean dysfunctional family, and the
current process consists of finally experiencing the old patterns of how they
were treated directly, and then releasing all the frightening but hidden
“implants” of long ago.

“SWEATLESS” (Non-operating sweat glands)

“Professional pariah.” Their physical condition limits and alienates them

from acceptance by the mainstream social scene. They have a strong
experience of isolation and alienation, with a “protective armor” shield
against love. They are ejection-expecting and rejection-eliciting, and they
often reject back and reject first.

There was severely ambivalent parenting, along with a self-shielding-

inducing “love is a poison apple” experience, including perennial emotional
isolation during childhood. The task/challenge for them now is to learn they
deserve love, to let love in, to accept themselves as they are, and to know
that God loves them unconditionally.

SWELLING

“Plugged drains.” They are being stuck in their thinking, and they are “all
clogged up” with painful ideas and negative feelings. They can’t let go of
the past, and they are full of remembrance-resentment. They refuse to flow
and grow out of being trapped in the past and afraid of the future.

They are emotionally resisting the flow of life, and they are holding back
their feelings. They are afraid to express or experience their feelings, for
fear they will be inappropriate, that they will lead to disastrous
consequences, or that they will be harmed if they do so. Their family was

963
highly feeling-avoidant and emotionally suppressive. (See the affected areas
for more information)

“SWELLING UP”

“Holding on.” They are not letting go of something or someone, and they
are resistant to changes. They are hanging on to the past for fear that if they
let go, something awful will happen.

They are repressing, denying or clutching to inner feelings and urges. They
feel emotionally trapped in the direction they are going in, and they feel
unable to emotionally assert themselves to bring any release. They had to
grit and bear it in their rigidly restricting dysfunctional family.

******************************

“Over-burdened.” They feel like they are carrying a heavy load on their
shoulders, an overload of responsibility. They want to share the load, but
they are afraid to ask for fear of alienating and losing what support they do
have.

It’s a “Cinderella/Cinderfella” pattern in which they were held accountable

and responsible for the needs and situations of everyone and everything in
their family, while the only support they got came from that “unsung
hero(ine)” role in a “serve-aholic” situation.

******************************

“Love-starved.” They are desperate for love and afraid of the loss of love.
Water retention is in effect stored grief from this whole situation and life
history. It comes from a fear that any change will result in the loss of even
more in their life.

They’d rather keep things as they are than take a chance that they will end
up with nothing, which is what they fully expect is their “just desserts” for
all the “failures” of their “care-taking,” as represented by the negative
events in their family’s history.

964
 ******************************

“Clutching/clinging.” They have a great fear of losing something vital to

their survival and acceptability as a human being. They are intensely
abandonment-paranoid and approval-enslaved, and they are into severe self-
suppressing and pleasing-appeasing patterns as a rejection-deflection
strategy. They are also prone to highly possessive and jealous patterns in
their relationships.

It is the result of being placed on very conditional acceptance from very

early on. They had to earn their “love-line,” which of course “meant” that
“God said” that they don’t deserve love, -- they “earn” it by “selling out”
and hating themselves for it.

SYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“Grief-stricken.” They are more or less immobilized by their long-standing

devastation reaction to their early history of deprivation and non-nurturing.
They were more or less left to their own devices from the very beginning,
and they have an underlying belief that they got their “just desserts.”

*************************************

“Despair-dominated.” They have the feeling that nothing they do can

change the downhill slide that their life seems to be taking. They are the
product of an implacably dysfunctional family who systematically
undermined their capacity for independent and effective functioning.

*************************************

“Atonement-freak.” They are convinced that they are responsible for World
War II, and they are on a systematic “karma-payback” effort. They come
from a highly accusatory, accountability-attributing and demandingly-
dependent dysfunctional family.

*************************************

965
“Red-orange alert.” They are continuously in a state of mild agitation,
somewhat along the lines of Don Knotts in his constant anxiety mode. They
feel somehow at least slightly endangered at all times. It comes from
growing up in an unpredictably dysfunctional family in which things would
come at them “off the wall,” so to speak.

*************************************

“Chronically angry.” They are forever feeling thwarted, invaded, and even
violated. They are instantly irritable and resentfully reactive most of the
time. They are the product of a severely frustrating and unassailably
dysfunctional family who continuously subjected them to enraging
experiences.

“SYNDROME X” (“Spare tire,” high cholesterol, high blood pressure,

elevated blood triglycerides)

“Love-starvation.” They have a desperate longing to belong, yet they are

intensely emotionally insulated. They also experience much social isolation,
with a resulting self-sustaining self-nurturance pattern. They are a self-
protective “urban hermit” who was continuously blamed, in an “If it
weren’t for you . . .” pattern.

They ended up believing that they don’t deserve any better, so they have
withdrawn from social involvement on any close or vulnerable level, and
they have turned to self-sustaining love-substitutes such as carbohydrates,
sugar and pasta. (See DIABETES -- TYPE II)

SYPHILIS

“Moral cretin.” They are giving away their power and effectiveness to the
evaluations of others. They are self-rejecting and ashamed of themselves for
being who they are. As a part of this, they have severe sexual guilt and a
need for punishment. They believe that their genitals are “sinful,” “dirty”
and “evil,” due to puritanical and punitive and simultaneously prurient and
sexualizing parenting.

DEMENTIA DUE TO SYPHILIS

966
“Gradually leaving.” They have a strong belief in not being “good enough,”
with much self-intolerance, self-rejection and self-destructive potential.
There is also severe sexual guilt imposed by an over-possessive and
seductive-received little or no love/acceptance from the very beginning.

It is in effect a severe maternal deprivation and familial denigration

reaction. They therefore are “following orders” and leaving the planet by
self-harming degrees.

TABES DORSALIS (Gradual paralysis and disrupted movement, due to

syphilis)

“One and only one way.” They are getting stuck, due to paralyzing
thoughts. They are fixated on a particular mindset, mental approach, and
paradigmatic model. They want to “make things all right,” out of having to
be the one responsible for everything that happens. But they are extremely
rigid in how they think that should be.

They are trapped in implication-terror at the thought of things being

different from what they imagine or of trying a new approach to things.
They come from a similar family system.

*****************************

“Cosmic paranoia.” They are full of guilt and rejection of life; they are not
able to forgive others or themselves. They have an intensely anxious
relationship with the Universe that is full of fear, uncertainty and insecurity.
They have a “God will KILL me if I do anything different!” feeling. They
have ended up feeling stagnated and immobilized.

It is the result of a very rigid adaptation to a severely dysfunctional and

frightening family who themselves manifested a very fearfully narrow
viewpoint and lifestyle. They played the role of the “family hoist” who was
the pivotal point of everything.

DEATH BY SYPHILIS

967
“Yes, Mommy/Daddy.” They felt that they were “bad, wrong and evil”
because “God said so.” The overall underlying message in their family was
that they should go play on the freeway -- and so they did.

They were the product of a severely sexualizing, sex-ploitative and

seductive-destructive “tantalizing tarantula” family system who hated their
gender, and yet who were fatefully drawn to them like a moth to the flame -
- with furious reactions.

SYSTEMIC INFECTION (Out-of-control yeast, protozoa, bacterial, viral,

parasitic or other infestations)

“Going up in flames.” They are totally enraged at their situation in an all-

consuming massive irritation, frustration and outrage reaction. It is a
festering condition that is resulting in breakdown of their whole system.
They feel cosmically abandoned and betrayed, and they are “running on
empty” in profound sorrow.

There is a deep grief, despair, demoralization and devastation experience

that results in a “What’s the use?” response to the overwhelming inequity of
energy exchange in their life. They experience being “asked to do the
impossible with nothing” in completely intolerable circumstances.

They had to carry the world on their shoulders in a massively dysfunctional

family in which they could do nothing to improve the situation, and yet they
were still expected to “make it all better.”

The result was a draconian “Cinderella/Cinderfella” profoundly abusive

exploitation situation. This can sometimes result in a possession (invasive
takeover) by a non-material primitive and/or “evil” being.

Section 19

968
S

969
S

447

970
971
S

448

449

450

451

452

972
453

454

455

456

457

458

459

460

973
461

462

463

464

465

466

467

468

469

974
470

471

472

473

474

475

476

477

975
478

479

480

481

482

483

484

485

486

976
487

488

489

490

491

492

493

494

977
495

496

497

498

499

500

501

502

503

978
TAPEWORM (Digestive system parasite that is about 1/4 inch wide and
very long)

“Unclean.” They are experiencing self-disgust and self-rejection, along with

a strong belief in being a victim. In both a reactive enslavement and a self-
fulfilling prophecy manner, they have a sense of helplessness and an utter
vulnerability to the seeming attitudes of others as being “God’s Gospel
Truth.”

They then become what was said, or they elicit the negative responses to
themselves. They were massively shame-induced by their family.

***********************************

“Goodie-getting.” They are consumed with materialistic ambitions,

abundance-seeking, and comfort concerns. Sophisticated greediness eats
away at them. It arose from a highly self-involved family system that was
operating out of an underlying survivalist mentality.

TARDIC DYSKINESIA (Uncoordinated involuntary movements

precipitated by psychiatric medication)

“So you think you got away, do you?” They were severely programmed by
their family to fail in all aspects of effective functioning. Their attempt to
restore some semblance of sanity to their beingness has activated an “Oh no
you don’t!” sub-routine designed to prevent them from ever engaging in
self-committed destiny-manifestation.

TEAR DUCT PROBLEMS

“Grief-avoidance.” They do not want to be in touch with their underlying

anaclitic depression arising from early maternal deprivation. They fear that
they will “cry themselves to death,” and/or they feel that have no right to
“wallow in self-pity.”

The result is they backlog their long-resisted mourning, and it damages or

disrupts the tearing process. They repress all their feelings out of the belief

979
they do not have the right to have them, much less to release them. They
learned this pattern in a household in which it was considered “evil” to “feel
sorry for themselves” or to “impose themselves” on others with their
feelings.

“TEETH-CHATTERING” (Frequently)

“Out on a limb.” They are thoroughly “spooked,” like a sentry on duty in

highly dangerous guerrilla warfare territory. They feel totally threatened and
potentially unable to cope with what is coming. It’s an old, familiar feeling,
in that they were more or less left to their own devices a lot when they were
a child in their self-immersed dysfunctional and potentially dangerous
family.

***********************************

“Out in the cold.” They have a lot of deprivation-grief and fearfulness about
lack of support and being alone in the world. They are commitment-
distrusting and love-starved, arising from early rather severe deprivation.
They grew up in a self-immersed and uncommitted family.

The sudden leaving of anger will also often result in a feeling of coldness,
as the underlying grief and/or fear are then experienced.

“TEETH-GRINDING” (Chronic)

“Battening the hatches.” They have a real fear of expressing emotions and a
bad case of “run amok-anxiety” generated by their considerable repressed
chronic anger, resentment and hostility. They don’t trust themselves as far
as they can throw a grand piano, and they keep their mouth firmly shut. Yet
they are thoroughly frustrated reformer of the world who has consistently
run into a brick wall of ubiquitous impact-prevention -- to the point where
they are ready to kill.

It started in a family where they were led to believe that if they perform
well enough they can get the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval,” while
in fact it was an irrational and thoroughly dysfunctional system why
massively undermined their self-trust.

980
TEETH PROBLEMS

“No more putting off.” They are being forced to deal with their oldest
unresolved issues that span many lifetimes. The area involved is that of
responsibility, and as a result, they lack vitality and aggressiveness, due to
their great conflict about it.

There are two possible scenarios involved here:

1) “Indecisiveness.” Problems in this area are being reflective of long-

standing inability to come to decisions that is due to an inability to break
things down for analysis and choice-making.

They are prone to be undisciplined in their attitudes and expression, and

they are manifesting negligence in their life-management. They are
systematically power-avoidant, responsibility-deflecting, unambitious,
assertiveness-suppressing, and lacking in determination.

The resulting build-up and sudden release of “Reggie the Raging Room-
Wrecker” frustrated rage-outs are one of several processes by which they
are therefore unsuccessful in money matters and intimacy. They simply
have no idea what the principles of truth and right action are.

The pattern is the result of a systematically power-derailing, competence-

undermining, and responsibility-deflecting possessive parenting pattern
involving interference-running, do-for-ing, under-requiring, or
demoralization-and immobilization-inducting.

2) “Immobilization.” They are experiencing overwhelm reactions, due to

feeling compelled or required to take on responsibilities that are in effect
way over their head. They tend to “bite off more than they can chew,” in
terms of their capacities and motivational structure.

As a result, they are being inundated with requirements and felt

accountabilities. They have not developed or they have lost the ability to set
priorities and boundaries, and they are caught up in a “parent-rescue”
psychology.

981
It comes from their having long-standing soul guilt around past life patterns
of irresponsibility, coupled with being expected to be the “family hoist” and
to “make things all better.”

When these expectations were far too much for them to handle as a child,
they became targeted for much accusation, attribution and guilt/shame-
induction, as if they were the cause of all their family’s problems, and as if
they were cosmically required to “atone for” and to “make up for” all they
have “caused.”

RIGHT TEETH

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are having difficulties in coming to

terms with the necessity to develop deliberate conscious attitudes and
actions in the world. They were likely to have been hampered in
comprehending and mastering the processes of cope-ability.

LEFT TEETH

“Over-mental.” They tend to have difficulty handling their instinctual,

intuitive, spontaneous, unconscious and non-calibrating reactions. They
were trained to be oblivious to how to track or manage this part of their
functioning.

UPPER TEETH

“Competence-avoidance.” They tend to have problems with coming to

effective decisions. They also have problems with authority -- their own.
They are the product of an oppressive patriarchal family and/or of a
confidence-and competence-undermining enmeshed family.

LOWER TEETH

“Outsider.” They are rather resistive to responsibility and receiving, both.

They feel not part of the world, alien, incompetent and/or alienated. They
were simultaneously under-required and denigrated in their enmeshed,
blame-throwing dysfunctional family.

982
Every tooth pertains to a tendency, trait and/or soul lesson. The following is
a map of these qualities, presented in the order that they present themselves
to us. Dentists number the teeth sequentially, starting with the right upper
jaw most back tooth and going to the most back left upper tooth, and then
the numbers go from the most far back left bottom tooth to the most far
back right bottom tooth. These numbers appear with each tooth.

RIGHT FRONT INCISOR (Top Center) [# 8]

“Anger-agitated.” They tend to have problems with resentment, perhaps

even to the point of combativeness and violence-proneness. It is a pattern
generated by parenting which was insufficiently structuring. Although they
were apt to have “gotten away with murder,” they tend to have no sense of
sustenance or support from the environment.

SECOND TOP RIGHT [# 7]

“Rootless.” They have a propensity to be “footloose and fancy-free,” and to

have difficulty in their ability to commit or settle down. It is the result of
having a “special relationship” with the parent(s) that however was never
grounded or solidified, and that tended to be rather gamey and
manipulative.

THIRD TOP RIGHT (Canine) [# 6]

“Constant correcting.” They are prone to be critical of their intimates, in a

shift-over of the resentment they feel toward the capacity-undermining
parent(s). They feel that “love is a poison apple,” and that it is therefore
rather untrustworthy.

FOURTH TOP RIGHT [# 5]

“Perennial child.” They have a pattern of displaying a propensity to not take

things seriously. They are apt to be rather flippant, and they may lack
maturity. Underneath, they have something of a self-respect, self-
acceptance and sense of self-worth problem. This is a pattern that was
generated by non-requiring and over-doting parenting.

983
FIFTH TOP RIGHT [# 4]

“Perennial adolescent.” They have a tendency to be sarcastic, impudent and

rebellious towards their intimates. Bottom line, they were undermined in
their ability to be self-expressive, creative, and sexually mature. It resulted
from parental interference with their independence-, initiative-and identity-
formation processes.

SIXTH TOP RIGHT [# 3]

“Erotic over-do.” They tend to display some under-control of their sexual

and affectional impulses, due to having been sexualized and interference-
run in a “special relationship” with their mother.

SEVENTH TOP RIGHT [# 2]

“Urban hermit.” They are likely to be an “among us but not of us” type of
person. They have been more or less alone on their own all their life, due to
a rather self-immersed and convenience-concerned parenting.

****************************

“Opportunistic.” They tend to want to live by their wits and to milk things
for what they can get out of them, with insufficient regard for their
environmental impact. It is a result of convenience-concerned parenting that
let them “get away with things” as long as it didn’t interfere with the
parent(s) “comfort zone.”

EIGHTH TOP RIGHT [# 1]

“Tendency to larceny.” They have a propensity to want to operate in a

manner in which they seek to sneak one by on people. It’s the result of
being shaped to unilaterally seek to get their way a lot when they were
growing up.

****************************

“Visiting anthropologist.” They are something of a cultural outsider who

does not subscribe to the interpretations and values of the mainstream. They

984
have had to fend for themselves from the very beginning, as they were in
effect shoved to the sidelines of their family. They have been at the
sidelines of society ever since, believing it is their just desserts and the only
way they can live.

LEFT FRONT INCISOR (Top Center) [# 9]

“Space case.” They tend to lack a sense of groundedness for practical

operation. They are likely to have not had to figure things out for
themselves, and they therefore don’t know themselves, the world, or the
Cosmos.

SECOND TOP LEFT [# 10]

“Rudderless.” They are rather nervousness and anxious, because they are a
bit uncertain as to how to navigate through the world. They feel they have
little sense of foundation, and there is a resulting rather unsettled feeling
regarding their guidance system. They feel they got little support or
guidance for developing their values and comprehension of things.

THIRD TOP LEFT (Canine) [# 11]

“Irritability.” They tend to have some anger issues, and they may even
display some violent propensities toward their intimates, because of a
transfer of their resentment of their parent for tending to derail their destiny
with their “love.”

FOURTH TOP LEFT [# 12]

“Erotic self-defeat propensity.” They tend to have problems in the control of

their sexual impulses, due to sexualizing parenting. This tends to undermine
their self-trust, self-acceptance, and their sense of self-worth.

FIFTH TOP LEFT [# 13]

“Love-aholic.” They tend to be prone to “sudden romantic attractions.” This

indicates that they are uncertain of their worth, and that they are rather
afraid of manifesting their self-expression, creativity and sexuality.

985
They are also vulnerable to a sense of personal powerlessness and
dependency on others’ evaluations of them. They were undermined in their
sense of their love-ability by “love-gamey” parenting.

SIXTH TOP LEFT [# 14]

“Stranger in a strange land.” They feel somehow different and like an

outsider, because they were systematically shaped into being a misfit in
society by possessive parents.

SEVENTH TOP LEFT [# 15]

“Unfit for human consumption.” They have the experience of being

somehow unacceptable, as a function of their not fitting into their family
system from the very beginning, with the result that the family tended to
eject them.

EIGHTH TOP LEFT [# 16]

“Alien.” They feel somehow strange, weird and even non-human, due their
being of a different soul nature from their family and/or due to rejection and
accusations of deviance by their family.

BOTTOM RIGHT CENTRAL [# 25]

“Sustenance-avoidance.” They tend to be “allergic” to nourishment and

nurturance, including a number of foods. This is a function of the fact that
they tended to be rejected at the emotional level by their family.

SECOND BOTTOM RIGHT [# 26]

“Studied incompetence.” They are prone to be unable to function

effectively in the world, and to be thereby self-defeating. It is a reaction to
competence-and confidence-undermining parenting.

THIRD BOTTOM RIGHT [# 27]

“Shooting themselves in the foot.” They tend to be somewhat self-

sabotaging in their functioning, due to belittling parenting patterns.

986
FOURTH BOTTOM RIGHT [# 28]

“Self-put downs.” They are apt to be rather self-denigrating, as a result of

negating and accusatory parenting.

FIFTH BOTTOM RIGHT [# 29]

“Self-undermining.” They tend to be success-avoidant, and to experience

setbacks, losses and non-optimal of quality of life. It comes from being
accused and guilt-induced as a child.

SIXTH BOTTOM RIGHT [# 30]

“Self-defeating.” They are apt to be self-undermining in their attitudes and

patterns, due to being made to feel somehow unacceptable for being who
they are.

SEVENTH BOTTOM RIGHT [# 31]

“Potentially self-endangering.” They tend to be somewhat self-destructive

in their orientation and inclinations, as a result of rather accusatory and
rejecting parenting.

EIGHTH BOTTOM RIGHT [# 32]

“Self-rejection.” They have something of a pattern of self-destructive

activities, due to being left more or less to their own devices from early
childhood.

BOTTOM LEFT CENTRAL [# 24]

“3-D focused.” They tend to have a rather over-materialistic orientation and

philosophy. It reflects a similar immersion in the world of the senses by
their parents.

SECOND BOTTOM LEFT [# 23]

“Is it for real?” They are apt to be rather rejecting of spiritual issues, of
religion, and of matters of faith. They were rather poorly received and

987
integrated by their mother in the beginning, and as a result, they have trust
of the Universe issues.

THIRD BOTTOM LEFT [# 22]

“Nonsense!” They tend to devalue religion, spiritual issues and matters of

faith. They are the product of rather materialistic and selfish parenting that
denigrated the sacred realm.

FOURTH BOTTOM LEFT [# 21]

“Cynical inclinations.” They tend to have a somewhat nihilistic and

pessimistic in their orientation. It arises from a rather self-immersed and
self-serving parenting history.

FIFTH BOTTOM LEFT [# 20]

“Depressive.” They are apt to have something of a despairing orientation,

due to rather unconcerned parenting.

SIXTH BOTTOM LEFT [# 19]

“God is Al Capone!” They are inclined to have the feeling that the world is
sort of a “mafia arrangement” -- with them on the “hit list.” It comes from a
rather intensely self-immersed and self-serving parenting approach where
they punished the individual if they got in the family’s way.

SEVENTH BOTTOM LEFT [# 18]

“Despairing.” They are apt to be a tendency to a “What’s the use?”

orientation on their part, as a result of having grown up in a non-impactably
self-immersed family.

EIGHTH BOTTOM LEFT [# 17]

“Amotivational.” They have a propensity to be rather demoralized and

uninterested in things. It is a pattern that arises from rather neglectful and
uncaring parenting.

988
“BANDS,” “RETAINER,” OR ARTIFICIAL TEETH PROBLEMS

“Personal power-restraint.” Their feeling is that they are “getting too big for
their britches,” that they are “bursting out” of their carefully prescribed and
proscribed role and capabilities. They are the product of a rather rigidly
role-restricted and repressive family.

They have been developing and growing in their capacities, awareness and
identity/destiny. Now it is beginning to have a definite impact on their
decision desiderata and on their intervention process, and the changes are
generating alarm in them and in those around them. (See the particular teeth
or parts of the mouth involved for more information)

BRIDGEWORK PROBLEMS

“Can’t handle it!” They are having difficulties in the management of their
responsibilities and in accepting accountability. They tend to be lacking in
the ability to deal with the requirements of living, and they are prone to
becoming overwhelmed by life.

They therefore are apt to “withdraw from the fray” into physical and/or
emotional isolation in an “urban hermit” -- “sealed unit” response pattern. It
is a pattern that started when they were either under-required and/or over-
required of as a child.

BREAKING OR LOSING FILLINGS

“Immobilized.” They are feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope with

their current challenges, stresses and difficulties. It arises from intense
competence-and confidence-undermining parenting.

*******************************

“Clearing up.” Old patterns and issues regarding decision-making, taking

stands, understanding what is happening, and the like are leaving, due to
healing processes. (See the particular teeth involved for more information)

CARIES (Cavities)

989
“Violation issues.” They have to deal with multiple life issues that they
theretofore haven’t been able to handle that must be handled now around
boundaries and responsibilities.

They are having real trouble discriminating what to let in and what not to
allow in, and they feel very vulnerable and intensely irritated. There is
much suppressed anger, frustrated resentment and emotional conflict
involved here.

They had to shove things under the rug and put things off when they were
coming up in their dysfunctional family, and it is now coming to roost. (See
the specific teeth involved for more information)

CARIES (Cavities) IN CHILDREN

“Why are you doing this!?” There is much conflict about what they are
receiving and about significant family problems, to which the child is
reacting with anger and despair. They are feeling that they are getting
“rotten nourishment” for whatever reason.

COLD-SENSITIVE TEETH

“Despair-avoiding.” They are engaged in systematic grief-avoidance and

depression-deflection, deriving from early emotional deprivation and
excessive responsibility in childhood.

COLORING ALLERGY (Dyed to match the gums)

“Grief-anger.” They are feeling considerable resentment over deprivation

issues. It got started in infancy, when they were emotionally neglected. It
continued throughout their childhood.

DENTURE PROBLEMS

“Can’t handle it!” They are having difficulties in the management of their
responsibilities and in accepting accountability. They tend to be lacking in
the ability to deal with the requirements of living, and they are prone to
becoming overwhelmed by life.

990
They therefore are apt to “withdraw from the fray” into physical and/or
emotional isolation in an “urban hermit” -- “sealed unit” response pattern.

It is a pattern that started when they were either under-required and/or over-
required of as a child.

“DRY SOCKET” (Tooth infection)

“Desert island.” They feel somehow ostracized as a pariah, and that they are
somehow “unfit for human consumption.” They were severely rejected,
neglected and blamed as a child.

FILLING REACTION (Mercury)

“Vulnerable-feeling.” They are having real problems with mental and/or

emotional experiences of weakness and impactability. Life’s vicissitudes
and difficulties have undermined their sense of safety.

There is a disruption of the flow of communication in the form of input-

deflecting and/or expression-suppressing. They are freaked out and
distrusting of the Universe, and they feel that they have to be on “red-
orange alert” with “hands on” control of everything.

The current situation is giving them the sense that they are back in their
significantly dysfunctional family, in which they were the “sane one” upon
whom everything and everyone depended, and where they were in way over
their head.

HEAT-SENSITIVE TEETH

“Helplessness-resentment.” They are experiencing suppressed anger over

felt powerlessness. It arises from having been systematically oppressed
and/or shame-induced over their personal potency.

IMPACTED WISDOM TOOTH

“Heel-digging.” They are not giving themselves the mental space to create a
firm foundation for themselves. They are afraid to open their consciousness
to the expansion of life. They have the fear that if they do, something

991
dreadful will happen. They have a restrictive consciousness and a belief in
scarcity of the basic necessities for survival.

There is a great deal of underlying grief and fear over growing up with
insufficient support in a “vast wasteland” self-immersed dysfunctional
family.

LOSING ENAMEL

“I’m here alone on my own.” They feel intensely vulnerable and

unprotected around decision-making issues. Their family stayed more or
less uninvolved unless the individual did, or they decided, something the
family didn’t like, and then the family attacked. (See the information above
for more understanding of what is occurring)

LOSING TEETH

“Indecisiveness.” They are manifesting learned helplessness and difficulty

in making decisions arising from insufficient nurturance, grounding and
teaching when they were growing up. (See the information above on the
particular tooth or teeth involved for more understanding of what is
occurring)

METAL TEETH PROBLEMS

“Working on it.” They are intensively trying to overcome the difficulties

indicated by problems with the particular teeth that have been made metal.
(See the information above for more understanding)

MISSING TEETH

“Power-avoidance.” In general, it indicates that the individual has been

heavily programmed not to be potent, decisive and influential in the world.
The missing teeth also indicate especially strong manifestations of the
problems associated with the particular teeth involved. (See the information
above on the particular tooth or teeth involved for more understanding of
what is occurring)

992
“PARTIAL” PROBLEMS (Dentures)

“Can’t handle it!” They are having difficulties in the management of their
responsibilities and in accepting accountability. They tend to be lacking in
the ability to deal with the requirements of living, and they are prone to
becoming overwhelmed by life.

They therefore are apt to “withdraw from the fray” into physical and/or
emotional isolation in an “urban hermit” -- “sealed unit” response pattern.

It is a pattern that started when they were either under-required and/or over-
required of as a child.

PLAQUE

“Grit and bear it.” There is intense anger over their situation, a sense of
having to put up with totally unjustified conditions. There is also an
accompanying feeling that they are doing the wrong thing, that they are
taking the incorrect action in their situation.

It is a “there is no joy in Bloodville” experience of a lack of happiness in

the decisions of life. They are grimily getting through the night, joylessly
making necessary choices that they have little faith in. They feel alone in an
indifferent world. They feel that things just go from bad to worse, and that
they have to make all kinds of unpleasant decisions.

It is very reminiscent of their childhood, when they simply had to make the
better of one bad situation after another that they were often blamed for.

PYORRHEA (Inflammation of the teeth sockets)

“Wimp-wilt.” They are angry at their inability to make decisions, as they

live out a “wishy-washy gutless wonder” lifestyle. They are the product of a
systematically confidence-and competence-undermining and potency-
punishing “keep ‘em around the old homestead” possessive parenting
pattern.

RE-ABSORBING TEETH

993
“I can’t do it any more.” They are feeling that there is no support from the
Universe, and they are now no longer able or willing to stand up for
themselves. It comes from growing up in a dysfunctional and untrustworthy
family.

“ROOT CANAL” (Boring out the decayed pulp center of the root of a
tooth)

“Lost at sea.” They can’t seem to “bite into” anything any more. Their
foundational beliefs and ways of doing things are being destroyed, and as a
result, they have lost their grounding and their roots. They feel rudderless
and directionless.

It is a result of the emergence of multi-life issues that they haven’t been

able to handle, and that must be handled now around responsibility-taking,
decision-making, and direction-setting.

This all arose out of having had to adapt to a significantly dysfunctional

family, with the result they had to adopt erroneous and self-defeating
assumptions and strategies.

SORENESS OF TEETH

“Can’t take it in.” There are difficulties assimilating what life presents
them. They have serious cope-ability-anxiety and competence concerns
about handling things, because they were systematically competence-
undermined by their family.

TARTAR

“Grit and bear it.” There is intense anger over their situation, a sense of
having to put up with totally unjustified conditions. There is also an
accompanying feeling that they are doing the wrong thing, that they are
taking the incorrect action in their situation.

It is a “there is no joy in Bloodville” experience of a lack of happiness in

the decisions of life. They are grimily getting through the night, joylessly
making necessary decisions that they have little faith in. They feel alone in

994
an indifferent world. They feel that things just go from bad to worse, and
that they have to make all kinds of unpleasant choices. It is very
reminiscent of their childhood, when they simply had to make the better of
one bad situation after another that they were often blamed for.

TOOTHACHE

“Worth issues.” They feel particularly troubled about their deservingness of

positivity and/or that they are especially overloaded with responsibility and
draining demands. They are also having competence concerns and perhaps
even “fraud” reactions.

They are manifesting considerable underlying shame. They are the product
of a massively demanding and wrong-making family with whom they could
do no right. (See the particular tooth/teeth involved for more information)

TEMPLE PROBLEMS

“Cognitive confusion.” They have a disrupted capacity to think clearly.

They also have a rather pronounced tendency to become disoriented,
immobilized and demoralized by life’s demands because they can’t make
sense of things. It is the result of a severe “Don’t think!” injunction from a
rather massively denial-dominated dysfunctional family.

RIGHT TEMPLE PROBLEMS

“What’s going on?” They have difficulty understanding what is happening

in their environment.

LEFT TEMPLE PROBLEMS

“What am I doing?” They are confused and discombobulated by their

internal experiences and feelings.

TEMPORO-MANDIBULAR JOINT (“TMJ”) PROBLEMS

“Utterly derailed.” They are undergoing total frustration at their inability to

make things happen the way they want. They feel it is very important to
move things in a direction that will deflect disaster, and they feel completely

995
thwarted in their efforts to make things go the way they need to. It comes
from growing up in a significantly dysfunctional family in which they were
made to feel responsible for making things work, and they couldn’t.

RIGHT JOINT PROBLEMS

“I didn’t want that!” They are experiencing intense frustration regarding the
results of how they go about doing things.

LEFT JOINT PROBLEMS

“Forced suppression.” They are intensely frustrated with not being allowed
or able to be themselves.

“TMJ” SYNDROME -- TEETH-GRINDING VERSION

(Temporomandibular Joint)

“Keep a tight grip!” They have intensely repressed and suppressed rage at
their situation which they dare not express. They keep their mouth firmly
clamped shut. They don’t trust themselves as far as they can throw and
grand piano, and they are full of “run amok-anxiety.”

They are hugely frustrated with the state of the world, and they desperately
want to re-form it, but they have consistently “run into a brick wall” of
resistance of refusal from the world. They are “ready to kill” about it.

This reflects a history of their trying to “make things all better” in their
dysfunctional family, in the context of perfectionist expectations of them.
The result was that no matter what they did, it didn’t work, and they are
desperately frustrated about their inability to get the “God Housekeeping
Seal of Approval,” and about their lack of success in making the world
work.

RIGHT TEETH-GRINDING “TMJ”

“HOW did I do that?” They are experiencing intense frustration regarding

the results of how they go about doing things.

LEFT TEETH-GRINDING “TMJ”

996
“Don’t be you!” They are intensely frustrated with not being allowed or
able to be themselves.

“TMJ” SYNDROME -- TRAUMATIC VERSION (Temporomandibular

Joint)

“You’ll pay for this!” They are experiencing a frustrated inability to

translate their feelings and intentions into effective action. Their
determination has found no place to go, and it has therefore turned into
resentment-rage, revulsion, and revenge motivation.

They are utterly disgusted with the way things keep turning out, and they
have reached the point where “This is an up with which I will no longer
put!” They intend to “set things straight,” no matter what it takes.

This whole pattern started in a family in which they were held accountable
and responsible for what went down in the family, but in which they were
given no functional power to make a difference in how things went down.

RIGHT TRAUMATIC “TMJ”

“God damn it all!” They are experiencing intense frustration regarding the
results of how they go about doing things.

LEFT TRAUMATIC “TMJ”

“I want to be me!” They are intensely frustrated with not being allowed or
able to be themselves.

TENDON PROBLEMS

“Sitting on themselves.” There is a deep conflict between what they think

they should be doing or going down and what their poisonous “inner voice”
is saying that they should do. They are engaged in excessive self-control
and fear of letting go.

The fear is of falling in love, of losing touch with reality, of losing

consciousness, of being rejected, of being abandoned, of being taken

997
advantage of, of loss of support, of loss of self, of “running amok,” and/or
of annihilation.

The result is excessive self-control and fear of letting go, along with a
refusal to manifest full maturity and stature. They have a certain rigidity
and tenacity of their concepts, and they are quite unforgiving of themselves.

They are “freaked out for dear life” by their “dangerous environment”
perceptions, and by their equally powerful self-distrust, both of which were
generated by a deeply distrusting and distrust-inducing family. (See the
areas affected for more information)

TENALGIA (Pain in the tendons)

“I don’t DARE!” They are exercising excessive self-control, and they have
a pronounced fear of letting go, due to strong underlying self-distrust and
self-non-forgivingness.

They are “freaked out for dear life” by their “dangerous environment”
perceptions, and by equally powerful self-distrust, both of which were
generated by a deeply distrusting and distrust-inducting family. (See the
areas affected for more information)

TENDONITIS (Inflammation of the tendons)

“Intention irritations.” They are intensely inner conflicted about where they
are going, and about what they are doing. They are thoroughly frustrated
with what is happening in their life, but they are deeply afraid of and guilt-
inhibited about changing how they are operating.

They have a strong case of “run amok-anxiety,” in the form of a great fear
of what would happen if they “let go and let fly” with themselves. So they
“sit and seethe.” It is a pattern that started in a deeply distrusting and self-
distrust-inducing family.

“TENNIS ELBOW” (See ELBOW PROBLEMS)

TENSION HEADACHES (Caused by muscle contractions)

998
“I’m failing!” They are afraid that they are not living up to their
responsibilities and commitments adequately. They are inclined to make
lists and to over-commit, in an exaggerated sense of requirement and of
accountability for the welfare of whatever realm they are in. It comes from
having been in a parental role from a very early age on, with their “love-
line” at stake.

TESTICLE PROBLEMS

“Requirement-deflecting.” They are into generativity-resistance and

responsibility-avoidance. They don’t want to have to deal with the demands
of child-rearing or of follow-through on projects and undertakings.

It arises from an under-requiring and over-indulgent parenting pattern,

especially by the mother, in a “keep him around the old homestead”
subconscious motivation.

*************************************

“Maturity-avoidance.” They have a fear of growing up and of their

masculinity, which was generated by a “tripod-raging” mother (she had an
irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs). She wanted him to remain
an “eternal boy,” to be there for her as a “safe” male element.

*************************************

“Held by the balls.” They are struggling with powerlessness feelings. They
feel that they are being taken over, that they are being restricted and
restrained. There may also be a fear of losing their masculinity, if it is a
woman they feel has “grabbed their balls.” It comes from having been
reared by a severely domineering family, mother in particular.

*************************************

“Masculinity-anxiety.” They have fears, insecurities and doubts about their

abilities, and about being a man. There may be conflicts about sexual
preference or about sexuality itself. There are likely to be deep concerns
about their ability to perform and about their potency. It is the result of

999
systematic undermining and/or denigration by their family when they were
growing up.

RIGHT TESTICLE PROBLEM

“Doing it wrong.” They have issues around how they want to manifest their
creativity or generativity (care-taking today and building tomorrow) --
around how they are going about manifesting it. It comes from a lot of
wrong-making about how they went about doing things as a child.

LEFT TESTICLE PROBLEM

“What if . . .?” They are having conflicts about what it is that they want to
manifest with their creativity or generativity. It arises from self-distrust
activated by negative assumptive parenting. (See GENITAL PROBLEMS --
MALE; PENIS PROBLEMS; PROSTATE PROBLEMS)

TESTOSTERONE PROBLEMS (Male hormone)

“Initiative issues.” They are being disrupted in their ability to be effectively

assertive, creatively instigating, confronting, aggressive, enduring, strong,
etc. They are undergoing difficulties with these impact-making and
difference-making motivations and resources. It arises from distorted and
dysfunctional parenting patterns with regard to the manifestation of the
creative initiative process.

LOW TESTOSTERONE

They are having problems with male shame, amotivational syndrome,

effective castration, or other confidence-, competence-and/or one-
pointedness-undermining feelings and manifestations. They were subjected
to initiative-negating and wrong-making parenting.

HIGH TESTOSTERONE

They are being prone to be aggressive, over-bearing, excessively willful and

or insensitive in their functioning. They were, in effect, overly conceded to
and “privileged position” parented. (See HORMONAL PROBLEMS)

1000
TETANUS; TETANY (Spasmodic contraction of the muscles)

“Immobilized by rage.” They are full of suppressed rage and festering

thoughts activated by their seething volcano-based desire to control
everything, along with a systematic refusal to express their feelings. They
don’t trust the process of life, and they are full of resentment regarding what
they regard as the absolute untrustworthiness of the world.

They are convinced that if they ever asked for what they wanted, it would
be deliberately withheld from them. They feel constantly betrayed, and they
are thoroughly enraged about it. Not only that, they feel that the information
would be used against them.

For the same reasons, they in effect can’t express their feelings, reactions
and interpretations. Their experience is it is dangerous to let the world know
where they are coming from and what’s happening with them.

They even believe that violence is the answer to many of life’s situations.
They are trying to control their rage before they run amok with it. It ends up
in constant contractions of both the extensors and flexors, ending up in
immobilization and spasms.

It is the result of coming from a highly distrusting, untrustworthy,

extortionistic and coercive control-manifesting family. They are passing on
what they learned at home. (See the specific muscles for further particulars)

The “TROTS;” The “RUNS”

“Scared shitless.” They are being overwhelmed by the requirement and/or

process of having either to let go of the past or to take on something
radically new and different. Something extremely important is pending and
about to happen, and they are totally terrified of its implications and
ramifications. They want to rush through it with their nose plugged, so to
speak, so as to not experience it or the transition process to it.

The situation at hand is one in which they are being forced out of their old
pattern of lifestyle, and they are completely blown away by the prospects of

1001
life without it. They come from a chronically anxious and catastrophe-
expecting “hunkering down in the bunker” family culture.

*************************************

“Hands-on control.” There is an underlying passivity and desire not to be

bothered, and yet they are simply terrified of letting go. They have an
abiding fear of the Universe, and they have to have personal control of their
life and of the environment around them. It feels almost like a matter of life
and death to them.

They grew up alone on their own in totally untrustworthy but seemingly

unimpeachable environment, but their deeper experience was that things are
never as they seem. They learned to take care of everything and everyone,
in a desperate disaster-deflecting psychology. The “buck stopped with
them,” while the family considered them to be the cause of all their
problems. (See “DIARRHEA;” “SPASTIC COLON”)

THICKENED BONES

“Nobody cares.” They have a profound feeling that they are in an

indifferent and unconcerned world. Their experience is that there is no
longer (or never was) any foundation to build on. They feel abandoned by
the “Home Office” (All that Is), and that there is nothing out there to sustain
them. So they have taken to becoming their own “pillar of strength” bodily.

It is, of course, the result of severe deprivation as a child, with the resulting
emotional starvation and despairing deprivation.

THIGH PROBLEMS

“Cope-ability-anxiety.” There is a paralysis of action, an immobilization, a

fear of the future at present. They have strong fears concerning their having
inadequate capacity, potency and strength. They tend to be success-
avoidant, self-restricting, and denying themselves of support.

They feel unlovable, and they are vulnerability-, intimacy-, and sexuality-
avoidant. They were systematically confidence-undermined, and their sense

1002
of worth was consistently denigrated by their possessive family. The net
effect is a lot of stored grief over all the deprivation and sex-ploitation, and
they have severe issues about lack of support and of strength to support
themselves and others.

The family did a “keep ‘em around the old homestead” program on the
individual which was designed to effectively prevent the individual’s
capacity to cope, succeed, connect and be involved in intimacy.

RIGHT THIGH

“Damage-control.” They have major conflicts regarding how they go about

manifesting their strength and providing themselves support. They have
considerable difficulty accepting commitments in the world, and in giving
support to friends, co-workers and colleagues. They also distrust and don’t
know how to relate to fellow workers and fellow travelers in the world at
large.

They don’t know how to handle the world of manifestation, environmental

impact, and legacy-leaving very well, because all that was systematically
undermined in childhood.

LEFT THIGH

“Am I up to it?” They are very unsure of their personal potency and
strength. They aren’t certain they can count on it or whether they have
enough of what it takes to make it. They also have great difficulty receiving
support, with intimate love and with sexual connection. All of this came
about because of an extremely exclusive claim-laying that their parent(s)
did on them.

INNER THIGH

“Sexual shame.” They are engaged in sexual guilt and incest-avoidance.

They feel both immoral for having an erotic nature and emotionally
inhibited in sexuality, due to the sex-ploitive parenting pattern they
experienced.

1003
OUTER THIGH

“Potency-shame.” They are handicapped by systematic success-avoidance.

They feel it would somehow be “parenticide” to develop their
environmental impact capabilities or to manifest their destiny, due to the
intense possessiveness of the parenting they underwent.

“THIRD EYE” AREA PROBLEMS

“Inner self-distrust.” They are systematically suppressing their intuition and

paranormal capabilities. They are heavily into imagination-avoidance, and
they are detached and intellectually stagnant. They have difficulty in
discrimination and focusing in life, in the form of perceptual problems.
They are lost in projections of their negative feelings and “distorting lens”
effects.

It came about as a function of their being in a family in which any form of

initiative or imaginative activity was either the basis of disaster in the
family’s functioning or the grounds for severe rejection and assault.

THIRSTINESS; DRYNESS OF THE MOUTH AND THROAT

“High and dry.” They are significantly handicapped by fear and anticipation
anxiety. They sense that something dangerous or punitive is imminent, and
they feel like a “fish out of water,” in that they fear that they don’t have
what it takes to handle it.

They feel that nothing is as it seems, and that at any moment something
awful could happen, and they feel that they can’t do anything to head it off
at the pass. They feel that they just have to handle it like an ever-vigilant
“hockey goalie.”

This feeling came from having had to deal with a family in which there was
much subterranean, subconscious, subtle subterfuge and sabotage going
down that no one saw or knew was happening.

THREAD WORM (See TAPEWORM)

1004
THROAT-CLEARING (See “CLEARING THEIR THROAT”)

THROAT PROBLEMS

“Grief-rage.” It is a case of intense sorrow-resentment over all the pain and

deprivation they have experienced. They are full of criticism and judgment
about how the world is, and they want no part of it any more.

They have reached the point where they are “gagging” on it, and they can’t
swallow any more of what life has been giving them. They’ve had enough,
thank you, and screw you all! They are the product of a severely self-
immersed dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Feeling-avoidance.” They are deeply suppressing their emotions, and they

are intensely avoidant of self-expression. They have an inability to speak up
for themselves, out of a feeling that they have no right to “make noise.”

There is also a fear that what they would express would set off World War
III. They are “sitting on” themselves, and they are stifling their creativity,
expressivity and transmission of information.

They are afraid of power, and they have catastrophic expectations of what
uses and abuses of anything they would put into words would be subjected
to. They are afraid to articulate what they know, feel, want and sense. They
grew up in a repressive and oppressive denial-dominated and blame-
throwing/accusatory family.

*************************************

“Vast wasteland.” Their family was withholding, with no nurturance, and

any time they did get something, it was invariably taken away. They have
had many loses and much insufficiency. They have had to swallow a lot of
hurts without saying anything, and they are very angry about that -- but they
dare not let that out. They are over-concerned with possessions as “security
blankets.” They underwent severely repressive and suppressive
enforcement of the “seen and not heard” mode.

1005
 *************************************

“Reality-refusal.” They are having difficulty with resistance or reluctance to

accept their reality, and they don’t know how to take it in. They are
experiencing a lot of confusion, and they are lacking in discernment.

They therefore tend to utilize their knowledge in insensitive, inappropriate

and harmful manner. They come from an intensely denial-dominated and
uninterruptible dysfunctional family.

*************************************

“Pulled in.” They have some very deep distrust of the Universe issues, and
they are like a turtle in its shell, refusing to come out. The feeling is very,
very strong that it is just too dangerous and disastrous to open their mouth
and speak out their truth.

So they keep their peace, huddle in their shell, and stuff their creativity.
Their life history has been replete with oppression and deprivation in a
highly authoritarian and abusive household.

*************************************

“No way, Jose!” They are under a great deal of pressure to change their way
of being and functioning in their present circumstances. They have decided
to “hunker down in the bunker” to ride out the siege, but they are not going
to change, as far as they are concerned.

They are the product of an entrenched conservative family system who felt
extremely strongly that theirs was the only way to fly. Or they decided to
withdraw from the family fray early on, and to march to their own
drummer, come what may.

RIGHT THROAT

“Dare I say it?” Their fear is that if they speak out or express what they
know, the environment will abuse or misuse what they have shared.

LEFT THROAT

1006
“I’ll cause World War III!” They are either “run amok-anxious” self-
distrusting and/or afraid that if they express themselves, it will result in the
people in their environment abusing it, misusing it, or “losing it.”

THRUSH (Fungus in the mouth)

“What have I DONE?!” They are very angry about having made the wrong
decisions. It is a “TIGA!” (“There I go again!”) self-distrust and self-
disgust reaction. It comes from a family who focused heavily on what went
wrong with everything, and who were intensely harm-avoidant. They hated
hassles and trauma, and they made it very clear to the individual that if the
individual is going to do or decide anything, they had better get it RIGHT!

THYMUS GLAND PROBLEMS (“Master gland” of the immune system)

“Singled out for shit.” There is a consistent lack of fulfillment in their life,
and they have many difficulties of living. They have taken a passive
responsibility-deflecting approach in desperation, because nothing else
seems to work.

They have the experience that they are being persecuted, and they
experience life in a “Just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out
to get me!” manner. They feel picked on and besieged from all sides on all
issues. They literally feel attacked by life and by the Universe. It’s so
intense that it is seriously affecting their immunity to environmental
irritants and traumas.

Underneath all the survival struggle and feeling assaulted stuff is the Big
Question, “Why Me?” and their conclusion in their guts is that they asked
for it by being who and what they are inherently. The siege started in the
womb, and it has never let up, so they have a “gut conclusion” that they
somehow deserve it. So the breakdown of the immune system is a response
to both external attack and internal feelings of culpability.

It is the result of being treated like the “intimate enemy” in their family,
with a resulting “self-fulfilling prophecy effect” subsequently revalidating
that nothing has changed, and that they continue to deserve such treatment.

1007
It is, of course, a “delusional conclusion,” but it is one that seems to have
had all of reality on its side from the “git-go.”

THYROID PROBLEMS (Neck gland that secretes life-vital substances)

“But not for me.” They have a very strong experience in life in which
everything seems to be made and geared for everyone but them. They feel
that everyone else has some sort of secret for success that they will never
have.

For some reason involving a mysterious set of inherent “moral cretinisms”

and limitations on their part, above and beyond the ones they actually know
about, they are just never destined to have success, quality of life or love, as
they experience it. They feel that they have no right to express who they
are, to develop, to put out and apply their creativity, or to succeed. They are
the product of a withholding, suppressive and depriving dysfunctional
family.

*************************************

“Persona non grata.” They get loud and clear that no one wants to hear from
them. They are utterly and universally humiliated by being the only one
who doesn’t fit, who doesn’t get any support, who has to scrounge up and
“spit-and-haywire” together what they need, who no one wants anything to
do with, etc., etc., etc. They were the ejectee/rejectee/dejectee of their
family who had to do everything for themselves on their own hook.

*************************************

“Humiliation-rage.” They have a great deal of humiliation about the fact

that no one respects them. Their experience is that their existence and
importance is constantly being overlooked. They were the “odd one out” in
their accusatory and denigrating family.

*************************************

“Infantile tyrannosaurus.” Their experience is that “I never get do what I

want to do.” “When, is it ever going to be MY turn?!” They are the product

1008
of convenience-concerned parenting in which giving in to their whims was
the line of least resistance.

They ended up believing that they are being constantly denied their fair
share of things, due to the necessity of having to cooperate with the larger
picture in life. They decidedly have no concept of that or any intention of
participating in the give and take of life.

*************************************

“Unclear on the concept.” They have conflicts between what their conscious
mind intends and what their unconscious dictates, and the result is a certain
lack of discernment that gets them in trouble. They come from a family
who confused them constantly on what is right and proper.

*************************************

“Cowering in the cave.” They fear that they will lose out all their life and
they also fear for their life, in a form of annihilation-anxiety. There is also a
great deal of emotional imbalance relating to the past and to their personal
feelings.

They have the experience that if they do come out, they will be torn apart
by a hostile and wrong-making world. Their family undermined their ability
to cope and contribute, and they were subtly and continuously attacking.

“TICS” (Chronic uncontrollable movements, usually in the face)

“Nervous Nelly.” They are very fearful and attack-anticipating, and they
feel that they are being watched hostilely and judgmentally by others all the
time. They have the feeling that they can do no right. So they have curtailed
all their “unacceptable” feelings -- especially their sexuality and their anger.

They are super-self-suppressing, and they are very nervous, tense, and “run
amok-anxious” -- both about “blowing it” and about “blowing up” at all the
wrong-making, oppression and rejection that they have experienced.

1009
They are intensely afraid that they’ll “let their internal cat out of the bag,”
and that’ll be the end of everything. They have an intense self-distrust
arising from a severely stultifyingly suppressive and simultaneously sex-
ploitative and sadistic parenting pattern. They were treated as if they existed
only for their family’s gratification, edification and glorification, with no
room for them or their needs.

TICKS (Small insect that burrows under the skin)

“Violation-rage.” They are letting things “get under their skin.” They feel in
effect “raped by the Universe,” and they operate out of an “enraged victim”
psychology. It arose in an inexorably intrusive, invasive and oppressive
family.

“TINGLING” SENSATIONS

“Emotional suppression.” They feel that they dare not experience or express
feelings such as joy, love and fascination, and that it is not right or safe to
feel their feelings. They have a low interest in life, and they are feeling no
reason to go on.

It arises from a sense of separation from the “Source” and of abandonment

by the “Home Office” (All that Is). Their experience is that “there is no joy
in Bloodville,” and that joy, pleasure, and love are non-existent.

They have little capacity for hope or forgiveness or to feel and express their
emotions in positive ways. So they take an observing rather than a
participatory role, and they are distanced and disengaged from life. It is the
result of an “abandonment at an early age” experience in which they have
had to fend for themselves in what has been an indifferent world from very
early on.

*************************************

“Dreary destiny.” They feel that they are overburdened with responsibilities
and requirements in a non-fulfilling life. They have the experience of being
caught in a job they hate that they can’t let go of or quit.

1010
They have the feeling that they have to “prove themselves,” but they
haven’t the foggiest notion how, really. They are intensely tense and deeply
discouraged with their whole life.

They got started in this pattern in a family in which they had to take on
responsibilities and roles for which they were ill-equipped, and which were
exploitative and competence-development undermining in their nature. (See
the body parts affected for more information)

“WENT TO SLEEP;” “GOING TO SLEEP”

(Intense tingling sensations in extremities after period of inactivity)

“Responsibility-resistance.” They are reluctant to take on their life

requirements at present. They feel either emotionally disengaged,
amotivational or overwhelmed as a function of growing up in a household
in which there was little support and/or too much required of them all too
often.

TINNITUS [Loud ringing or other sounds in the ear(s)]

“Drowning it out.” There are messages from their Higher Self and the Other
Side, as well as from their outer environment, but they are a case of a
completely closed mind. They don’t want to hear any of it, and they are
refusing to listen. They are not hearing their “inner voice,” and they are
being intensely rejecting and stubborn.

They were so mistreated by their environment from the very beginning that
they have no trust in the Universe, in the world, or in others. They listen
only to their own long-established beliefs.

It all started in a severely oppressive and hostile home in which they were
treated as the “intimate enemy.” That happened severely and long enough
that they completely came to a “My mind’s made up -- don’t confuse me
with facts!” orientation.

That has done a never-ending self-fulfilling prophecy effect revalidation of

the original conclusions drawn so long ago and far away.

1011
RIGHT EAR TINNITUS

“Shut up!” They are refusing to listen to information from the environment.

LEFT EAR TINNITUS

“Go away!” They are stubbornly ignoring their inner knowing and their
“inner voice.”

TOE PROBLEMS

“Pie in the sky.” They are having real difficulties in getting a grip on their
grounding, direction and purpose in life. They have trouble integrating
what’s on their mind with the process of making things happen.

They tend to get “lost in space” and to be idealistic and impractical, or they
are prone to be unconcerned about or inept with the process of mastering
the details of manifestation. They can’t seem to translate ideas, values and
goals into plans, action and production.

They have an underlying fear that they don’t have what it takes to make
things happen, and they are competence-anxious and cope-ability-
concerned. They are the product of a severely competence-undermining
family who effectively prevented their developing the wherewithal to make
things happen on the practical level.

***************************************

“I don’t want to bother!” They don’t want to be hassled by all the mundane
details of handling things, and of translating their impulses and images into
effective productivity and contributory manifestation. The just don’t see the
point of becoming involved with things at that level. They were
motivationally distorted in such a manner that they now have trouble
dealing with the details of working towards the future. It was either “keep
‘em around the old homestead” possessiveness and/or a dysfunctional
incapacitation process arising from their inability to handle life themselves.

BIG TOE PROBLEMS

1012
“Lacking in manifestation resources.” They are having difficulties in the
enablement of the grounding process. They are having problems concerning
the capacity to connect with the necessary life-sustenance and intention-
manifestation resources.

RIGHT BIG TOE PROBLEMS

“No programs.” They are having trouble generating life-support and plan-
implementation strategies and tactics. They have the feeling that they just
don’t have the internal sub-routines to pull off life’s requirements.

LEFT BIG TOE PROBLEMS

“Don’t want to develop.” They have motivational issues about whether to

come up with or to develop sources of support, or about what kinds of
sources of support to develop.

They have conflicts about whether to come up with the wherewithal for
making their dreams, desires, intentions and plans happen, or for which
future scenarios to develop the manifestation resources.

BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Responsibility-avoidance.” They are in conflict about whether they should

really undertake full engagement requirements, and they therefore are
ambivalent about going after fundamental self-sufficiency and contribution.

RIGHT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Can I follow through?” They are deeply concerned about their ability to
complete things.

LEFT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Why bother?” There feeling is that they just can’t “get it up” for taking
care of business.

BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

1013
“Cope-ability-anxiety.” They feel as if they are lacking in the basic
capabilities of making it in life.

RIGHT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I just don’t have what it takes.” They are convinced that there is something
basic missing in their make-up regarding self-sufficiency.

LEFT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I can’t and I can’t care about it.” They are in effect amotivational
regarding taking care of themselves.

BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Hunkering down in the bunker.” They are in effect rigidly refusing to

undertake self-responsibility and contribution. At the same time, they need
to do so intensely. They are severely ambivalent, and they are therefore
hiding out.

RIGHT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Could I?” They aren’t sure they have the wherewithal to pull off self-
responsibility and contribution.

LEFT BIG TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Should I?” They have great reservations about their motivation to take on
life’s responsibilities.

BIG TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Can’t garner their resources.” They are having deep difficulties getting the
resources they need to implement self-responsibility and contribution
and/or they are tending to “shoot themselves in the foot” when they try, due
to all their conflicts in this area.

RIGHT BIG TOE TIP PROBLEMS

1014
“How do I get it together?” They feel that they just can’t seem to pull
themselves and the necessary resources into a workable system.

LEFT BIG TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Dear Prudence.” They are so conflicted about this whole business of taking
care of business that they end up not being willing to get it together to
“come out and play.”

BIG TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Competence-anxiety.” They feel like they are in over their head, and that
they don’t have what it takes to make it in the world.

RIGHT BIG TOE -- BONE PROBLEMS

“How can I do it?” Their experience is that they just plain don’t have the
know-how.

LEFT BIG TOE -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I don’ wanna!” They are so traumatized by the prospect of the

requirements of life that they are demoralized and anti-motivational.

BIG TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They have a profound underlying motivational questioning

that is making them intensely resistive to garnering the resources for
implementation of their purposes in life.

RIGHT BIG TOE -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I’ll screw it up!” They are so unsure of their motives that they won’t even
get things together to try.

LEFT BIG TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I won’t follow through!” They are convinced that they are so intensely
resistive that it would actually cause more trouble that it’s worth to try.

1015
SECOND TOE PROBLEMS

“Strategy questions.” They are having hassles in deciding which way to

proceed and where to go for gaining grounding, for getting life supports,
and for grasping the resources needed for the implementation of their
intentions.

RIGHT SECOND TOE PROBLEMS

“Garnering problems.” They have issues about how best to go about getting
what they need to make things happen.

LEFT SECOND TOE PROBLEMS

“Decision-resistance.” They are having difficulties in arriving at decisions

concerning what they need to make things happen.

SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT

“Direction-questioning.” There are deep conflicts about which direction to

go around getting the resources they need to live their own life.

RIGHT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Too many issues.” They have the experience that they don’t have what it
takes to make sense of things and to take a direction. They feel inundated
by all the desiderata of life.

LEFT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Unclear on the concept.” They feel like they are lost at sea with regard to
how to go about garnering what is needed for self-sufficiency.

SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Severe cope-ability anxiety.” They have great concerns about their sanity
and about their ability to even pull off living as an independent person.

RIGHT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

1016
“What if...?” They are full of scenarios of disaster should they try to take
life on its own terms.

LEFT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They are in effect terrified of what they might do if

they were forced to try to operate independently -- they literally fear that
they would “go crazy.”

SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“No way, Jose!” They are strongly resisting taking on life on its own terms.

RIGHT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“You can’t make me!” They are grimly determined not to be required of by
life, out of an underlying profound competence-anxiety.

LEFT SECOND TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I REFUSE!” They are absolutely committed to being taken care of and to

not having to expend or extend themselves into the world.

SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Intervention questions.” They are highly uncertain how to go about

translating their intentions into proper-direction interventions.

RIGHT SEOND TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“How do I know what to do?” They are unclear on the concept of how to
about intervening in things.

LEFT SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Muddy waters.” They don’t have a clear-cut value or priority system upon
which to draw for determining directions to go.

SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

1017
“Direction questions.” They are intensely concerned that the just don’t have
the wherewithal to pull off being able to know which way to go in life.

RIGHT SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“How do I know?” They feel like they’re navigating in a fog.

LEFT SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“How can I know?” They are just sure that they are lacking in basic
equipment regarding knowing which way to go.

SECOND TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Change-resistance.” They are really strongly resisting the changes in

direction in their life that are being required.

RIGHT SECOND TOE MID-SECTION -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I can’t!” They are convinced that they just don’t have the abilities required
by the new direction things are going.

LEFT SECOND TOE MID-SECTION -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I WON’T!” They are heavily digging in their heels, in a stubborn refusal

to go with the flow.

SECOND TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Decision-anxiety.” They are intensely competence-anxious about their

ability to decide and to implement their decisions regarding fundamental
support systems in their life.

RIGHT SECOND TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“I don’t know how!” They feel in over their head with regard to having to
process information and to arrive at decisions about their basic resources.

LEFT SECOND TOE TIP PROBLEMS

1018
“I don’t trust myself!” They are very unsure about their own trustworthiness
regarding decisions about their life support systems.

SECOND TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Overwhelmed.” Life’s vicissitudes and difficulties have undermined their

sense of sanity and ability to know what’s real and possible.

RIGHT SECOND TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“How do I know what’s real?” They don’t have any confidence that they
can tell reality from wishful thinking.

LEFT SECOND TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“How can I trust me!” They are convinced that they are vaguely crazy, and
that they would go off half-cocked if they tried to make distinctions and
discernments.

SECOND TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Scared to death.” There is a real rigidity and resistance to change in the

direction of their life that arises out of a deep-seated terror of the world.

RIGHT SECOND TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I’ll drive right off a cliff!” They feel severely unaware and unequipped to
deal with the requirements of the changes in the direction things are taking.

LEFT SECOND TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“They’ll KILL me!” They are thoroughly unnerved and paranoid about how
the world will react to and deal with any changes on their part.

MIDDLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Wherewithal difficulties.” They are having problems in the realm of

getting the resources for the grounded manifestation of their life energy,
sexual expression, creativity and personal potency.

1019
RIGHT MIDDLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Inner spark”-handling issues. They are encountering hassles around their

ways of dealing with the practicalities of channeling their internal initiative
and their impact-making resources.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Self-release issues.” There and considerable concerns about whether to

express or release their creativity, sexuality, potency and life energy, or
concerning in what arenas and with what resources to do so.

MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Motivational questions.” They are experiencing conflicts of motives

regarding whether and how to manifest their life energy, creativity, personal
potency and sexuality.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I’m not equipped to handle that.” They have the experience that they lack
certain fundamental resources for the manifestation of their soul and life
purpose.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Who am I?” They have a rather intense identity diffusion and a lack of
direction problem that makes it very difficult for them to commit to
anything.

MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Support issues.” They feel bereft of support for their manifesting their soul
energies, passion and potency.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Is there anybody out there?” They feel they landed on the wrong planet --
that what and who they are is “unfit for human consumption.”

1020
LEFT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“What am I doing here!?” Their experience is that they are on a desert

island with no relevance, no peers and no purpose.

MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Distrust of the Universe.” They have deep underlying doubts-about-the-

Universe issues around their being even allowed to, much less supported in
manifesting their beingness in the world, and they are therefore resisting
movement in that direction.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“It’s not safe out there!” They feel that the world is no place for them to be,
and they are avoiding involvement like the plague.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I don’t belong here!” They have the experience that there is something
inherently at least not acceptable, if not bad, wrong and evil about them that
makes them unwilling to trust the universe in any way.

MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Unclear on the concept.” They are intensely unsure as to what it would

take to be able to express their creativity, potency, sexuality and life energy
in the world.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I don’t know how.” They are so out of the loop that they feel unable to
implement their beingness in the world.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Lost at sea.” They are so befuddled about what it is to be who they are that
they have no effective means of navigating themselves through the world.

1021
MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Vulnerability-anxiety.” They are having real problems with mental or

emotional experiences of weakness and violability.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Outclassed and over-run.” Their experience is that they don’t have what it
takes to make it in this dangerous world.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Weirded out.” They believe that there is something inherently distorted

and dysfunctional about their inner workings that make them greatly at risk.

MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Soul-avoidance.” They are rigidly resisting moving in the direction of the

expression of their soul characteristics.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“How do I do it?” They don’t know how to go about the business of

manifesting their soul.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“What is it?” They are not at all sure of who and what they are at the soul
level.

MIDDLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Manifestation-incompetence.” They feel unable to implement their

potency, creativity, passion and sexuality.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Unequipped.” They feel lacking in the resources necessary to manifest

their beingness.

1022
LEFT MIDDLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Untrustworthy.” They feel that their inner soul is in effect unsafe to loose
upon the world.

MIDDLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Catastrophic expectations.” They are afraid of their making deadly

mistakes if they tried to translate their intentions into implementations
regarding their true soul motives.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I don’t dare!” They are rather intensely competence-anxious about their

ability to implement their intentions without creating disaster.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Self-distrust.” They are quite ashamed at what might lurk within that could
lurch out in “Mr. Hyde” style if they got in touch with their inner intentions.

MIDDLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Self-suppression.” They are refusing to surrender to their inner soul

characteristics and motivations, for fear of not doing it correctly.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I’ll blow it!” They are afraid that they are too incompetent to manifest
their inner soul.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I can’t be trusted.” They feel that their inner intentions are of such a nature
as to make it undesirable to release them.

FOURTH TOE PROBLEMS

1023
“Resource-garnering problems.” They have issues regarding the generation
of the resources and supports for the implementation of meaningful
involvements in life, such as relationships, work, responsibilities,
authority/respectability, success and spiritual manifestation.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE PROBLEMS

“Can’t come up with the ability to get resources.” They are encountering
difficulties in working out or coming up with the resources, strategies,
tactics and methods of bringing about significant and worthwhile
involvements and manifestations.

LEFT FOURTH TOE PROBLEMS

“Amotivational.” They are having conflicts concerning whether to be

involved in intimacy, efforting, requirements, authority issues, productivity
and with their sacred connection-maturity and contribution issues.

*************************

“Motivational ambivalence.” They are experiencing ambiguities as to

WHAT significant involvements to manifest -- values/ethics and motivation
issues.

FOURTH TOE BASE PROBLEMS

“Ability-generating difficulties.” There are problems in their coming up

with the resources and supports for meaningful involvements in life, such as
love and work.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE BASE PROBLEMS

“No comprehendo.” They feel like an outsider who doesn’t have the
wherewithal to garner the resources necessary for involvement in life.

LEFT FOURTH TOE BASE PROBLEMS

“Stranger in a strange land.” Their experience is that they are somehow

inherently different from everyone else in a manner that blocks their getting

1024
it together so as to become involved.

FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“No support.” They feel that they are not going to be able to have the
support they need from others if they become significantly involved in life.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Forget it!” Their experience is that there is just not enough support
available from others for them to become engaged.

LEFT FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I don’t deserve it.” They feel that due to something about their inherent
nature, they cannot and should not count on support from others for their
becoming involved in life.

FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Involvement-avoidance.” They are locked into their position of non-

involvement in life, and it is causing problems.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I can’t.” They feel like they lack the necessary competences that are
involved in becoming engaged in life.

LEFT FOURTH TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“No way, Jose!” They are adamantly refusing to take life on, out of an
underlying fear of what would happen if they did.

FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Method-ambivalence.” They have profound uncertainty about how to

become actively involved in life.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

1025
“How do you do it?” They are quite uncertain as to how to go about
becoming engaged.

LEFT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“What do I engage?” They don’t know who they are enough to become
engaged in life.

FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Alone on their own.” They feel that they have no standing or support in the
world.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Out on a limb.” They feel that they don’t have the acceptance or the
commitment they need from the surrounding social environment.

LEFT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Why bother?” They have the experience that no matter what they do, no
one will be there for them, so they disengage.

FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Involvement-resisting.” There is a lack of grace and presence in their

functioning, due to their own aloneness experience.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Socially incompetent.” They have a way of alienating others, due to their

alienation.

LEFT FOURTH TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“A pox on all your houses!” They feel that there is no point to their
becoming involved, due to their experience that they are a “stranger in a
strange land.”

1026
FOURTH TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Wherewithal questions.” They have real concerns about their having the
ability to be involved, meaningfully invested and vulnerable in life.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“I’m not sure I can do it.” They are highly uncertain about how to go about
becoming involved and invested.

LEFT FOURTH TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“I may be lacking.” They have an underlying fear that there is something

fundamental missing in their make-up that makes it impossible for them to
become involved in life.

FOURTH TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They feel that to become involved is to be in

essence killed, because they would be in over their head, and they would
enrage the world.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“They’ll kill me!” They are convinced that the social environment is so
hostile to them that they don’t dare become involved.

LEFT FOURTH TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Mr. Hyde.” They are afraid that if they get involved, their “inner demon”
will come out -- with disastrous results all the way around.

FOURTH TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Won’t budge.” They have a deep fear of what would lie ahead if they
became involved meaningfully in life and they therefore refuse to move.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE TIP --JOINT PROBLEMS

1027
“They’ll run amok.” They have a deep and abiding distrust of other people,
so they refuse to become meaningfully engaged.

LEFT FOURTH TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I’ll set off World War III.” They have an underlying fear of themselves and
of what they might do if they got involved.

LITTLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Interpersonal incompetence.” They are having difficulties in the realm of

their development and utilization of their social skills, their interpersonal
orientation, and the interactional manifestation resources.

Such actions as social connection, communication, gender identity, persona

projection, conducting business, family relationships and personal freedom
of expression are involved here.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Unclear on the concept.” There are issues concerning how to go about

such things as connecting with people, communicating, image-projecting,
etc.

LEFT LITTLE TOE PROBLEMS

“Interpersonal involvement questioning.” They have rather intense conflicts

about whether, how much, with whom, under what conditions and for what
purposes to develop the resources for manifestation of significant
interpersonal involvements.

LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“Involvement-avoidance.” There are internal issues about whether to

become involved with and connected to other people. There is a resulting
lack of development of interpersonal resource skills.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

1028
“No know-how.” They are lacking in some foundational interpersonal
interface capabilities.

LEFT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I don’ wanna!” They are quite ambivalent and alienated, and they
therefore avoid social involvement.

LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I’m outta here!” They would rather “take their marbles and go home” than
to face the challenges interpersonal connection.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Social competence-anxiety.” They are afraid that they don’t have what it
takes to succeed interpersonally.

LEFT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Alienated.” They are so disgusted with other people that they would just as
soon stay away.

LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Basic distrust.” There is a fundamental suspiciousness of other people that

makes them intensely resistant to developing interpersonal capabilities.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“I can’t fend them off.” Their experience is that they lack the wherewithal
to cope with other people’s untrustworthiness.

LEFT LITTLE TOE BASE SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Bah! Humbug!” They want nothing to do with other people, out of their
underlying paranoia.

LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

1029
“Contact-conflicted.” They are in great internal ambivalence conflict about
whether and how to connect socially with others.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“What would happen?” They are quite alarmed at the possible scenarios of
interpersonal involvement.

LEFT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT PROBLEMS

“I’m not so sure I want to.” They are not at all certain that they really care
to become interpersonally involved.

LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Out of the question.” They feel that they have no standing in the world,
and that they therefore are not in a position to develop interpersonal
connections.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Bereft.” They feel socially bankrupt, and they therefore avoid social
contacts.

LEFT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Ejectee-rejectee-dejectee.” Their experience is that they just don’t fit in

anywhere.

LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Catastrophic expectations.” They are unbendingly refusing to develop the

wherewithal to connect with others, out of the fear of what would happen if
they did.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Are you kidding?” They have the conviction that interpersonal

involvements are inherently dangerous.

1030
LEFT LITTLE TOE MID-SEGMENT -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Run amok-anxiety.” They have no faith that they wouldn’t do a bunch of

awfuls if they got interpersonally involved.

LITTLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Social competence-anxiety.” They are feeling utterly inept socially and

interpersonally, and they have no idea how to go about doing that
successfully.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“Befuddled.” They are so socially out of the loop that they haven’t the
foggiest notion how to proceed.

LEFT LITTLE TOE TIP PROBLEMS

“No redeeming social significance.” They have the feeling that they are in
essence “unfit for human consumption.”

LITTLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“Can’t handle it.” They feel that they are in effect in over their head when
they are dealing with other people.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I wouldn’t dare!” They have the experience of being overwhelmed in the

social sphere.

LEFT LITTLE TOE TIP -- BONE PROBLEMS

“I shouldn’t!” Their feeling is that they are such a “moral cretin” that
interpersonal involvement is out of the question.

LITTLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

1031
“Won’t budge.” There is no ease of movement in their interpersonal
functioning, and they are refusing to move into interpersonal involvement.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“What’s the use?” They feel in over their head interpersonally, and they just
won’t even try it.

LEFT LITTLE TOE TIP -- JOINT PROBLEMS

“Forget the whole thing!” They are convinced that whatever they are is
inherently not cut out for interpersonal involvement.

“STUBBED TOE”

“Implication-freak-outs.” They are experiencing conflicts between their

direction of development or movement and their inner desires or intentions.
They are having big concerns over the potential ramifications of what is in
process.

They grew up in a family in which things all too often went into “escalating
disasters.” They are therefore reluctant to take on things or to take the
initiative.

TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Detail-handling competence concerns.” They are having problems

regarding whether and how to retain, sustain and maintain their resources
for pragmatic manifestation on the daily operation and detail consideration
level.

They were competence-, confidence-and/or motivation-undermined in this

area by their family, so that, in effect, they don’t know how to handle their
resources. In the worst case scenario, they received “Skid Row”
programming.

BIG TOE/SECOND TOE INTERFACE PROBLEMS

1032
“Grounding resource questions.” They are having difficulties in the realm of
being practical and connected to Earth, and in the realm of sustenance
processes and outcomes, regarding their acquisition and the management of
the resources involved.

RIGHT BIG TOE/SECOND TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“How to get them?” They have issues around how to go about coming up
with ways of getting what they need.

LEFT BIG TOE/SECOND TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Don’t deserve them.” They are involved in conflicts about their right to
have support, resources and aspiration-activation processes happen for
them, and about the necessary decisions involved.

SECOND TOE/MIDDLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“How do I do it?” They are encountering difficulties concerning how to go

about gaining life support, being grounded, and expressing their life energy,
creativity, sexuality and relational needs.

RIGHT SECOND TOE/MIDDLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“How to decide?” They have issues regarding how to come to a resolution

on the practicalities of the meeting of their life energy, creativity, sexuality
and relational needs.

LEFT SECOND TOE/MIDDLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Decision-avoidance.” They are having conflicts regarding decisions

regarding getting what they need, especially regarding the expression of
their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs.

MIDDLE TOE/FOURTH TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Resource-garnering problems.” There are difficulties in garnering what

they need to manifest their life energy, creativity, sexuality relational needs,
work, respect, responsibility, success and spirituality.

1033
RIGHT MIDDLE TOE/FOURTH TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Inner spark” expression problems. They have issues in regards to how to

handle the expression of their internal soul in significant and worthwhile
manifestations.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE/FOURTH TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Inner release issues.” They have conflicts concerning in what arenas and
with what effect to release their “inner spark,” in terms of motivational and
values concerns.

FOURTH TOE/LITTLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Life resource problems.” They have difficulties in coming up with the

wherewithal to allow their becoming involved in meaningful relationships,
social connections and identity-expressions.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE/LITTLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Means problems.” They have run into difficulties regarding the resources
and approaches for bringing about significant and worthwhile involvements,
relationships and social connections.

LEFT FOURTH TOE/LITTLE TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

“Person without a culture.” They are experiencing conflicts involving value

and motivational concerns regarding the resources for significant
involvements and connections because they feel like a “visiting Martian.”

TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Confidence problems.” They are feeling unprotected and vulnerable in the

realm of their ability to be grounded and to handle the details of life, due to
competence-undermining by their family.

***************************************

1034
“Lack of support.” They are experiencing a sense of non-support for their
taking on the realm of handling the details of manifestation, due to
motivation-undermining programming.

***************************************

“Assertion problems.” There are difficulties with their displaying either the
lack of or too much assertiveness and aggressiveness in taking on the tasks
of taking care of the details of living, as a function of their having been
shaped into ineffectiveness in this area.

***************************************

“Fussiness.” They are prone to perfectionistic and pointillistic control of the

details of their manifestation process, due to growing up in either a
perfectionistic or a chaotic family system.

***************************************

“Selfish insensitivity.” They are apt to manifest self-immersion problems in

the realm of covering all the bases and he handling of the details of living,
as a function of their having been allowed to develop a coercive lifestyle.

***************************************

“Discombobulation.” They are caught up in confusion, demoralization and

immobilization in the realm of actually making things happen, as a function
of having been devastatingly ambiguously parented, so that they have in
effect withdrawn from the fray.

***************************************

“Amotivational syndrome.” They are having problems bothering with the

details of handling things, due to under-requiring and over-indulgent
parenting, so that they lack “true grit.”

BIG TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

1035
“Competence concerns.” They have issues about their ability to handle the
life-sustenance and intention-manifestation processes and requirements of
life. These concerns involve either a fear of lack of the wherewithal needed
or an over-insistence on their way of doing things

RIGHT BIG TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Resource-generation problems.” They are having difficulties regarding

their ability to generate life-sustenance and intention-manifestation
resources, due to competence-anxiety or excessive willfulness.

LEFT BIG TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Impetus problems.” They are encountering conflicts concerning their right

or motivation to come up with the life-sustenance and intention-
manifestation resources they need, due either to overwhelm-anxiety or to
insistence on having thing their way or no way.

SECOND TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Making-it-happen problems.” They have issues regarding deciding how to

proceed in the matter of their getting grounding and life-sustenance, as well
as of in their expression of their will. It is either because of cope-ability-
anxiety or of their anticipation of the environment’s reaction to their way of
doing things.

RIGHT SECOND TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Unsureness problems.” They are having difficulties in coming up with

ways that work for them in getting things done, due to their not knowing
how to or due to their being too sure of how they will get things done.

LEFT SECOND TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Desire uncertainty.” They have conflicts about deciding what they want to
happen with regard to life-sustenance and will-expression -- whether they
have the right or the wherewithal to do so or whether their way is really the
right way.

1036
MIDDLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Am I going to blow it?” They have concerns about the process of getting
what they need to manifest their life energy, creativity, sexuality and
relational connections in relation to their sense of competence, or in relation
to their “right and righteous” attitude.

RIGHT MIDDLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Approach problems.” They have difficulties in coming up with effective

ways of manifesting their “inner spark” and their impact-making process, as
a function of their overwhelming feelings or as a function of their insistence
pattern.

LEFT MIDDLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Expression-questioning.” They have conflicts about their right to express

their life energy, creativity, sexuality and relational needs or about the
impact of their way of doing so, in the form of insufficiency feelings or of
negatingness.

FOURTH TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Am I doing it right?” There are concerns around their generating the
resources they need for meaningful impacts in relationships, in terms of
their sense of a lack of abilities or of their excessive weddedness to their
way of doing things.

RIGHT FOURTH TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Caught up in their concerns.” They are encountering difficulties in

working out effective ways of bringing about significant and worthwhile
involvements and manifestations, due to their competence-anxiety or to
their excessive willfulness.

LEFT FOURTH TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Moral cretin.” They have value and ethical concerns about their way of
handling intimacy, contribution and spirituality around their felt lack of

1037
abilities or around their intense intentionality.

LITTLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Can I do it?” They have concerns about their ability to come up with
workable social connection, acceptance and standing resources, as a
function of their sense of lack of the capacity, or of their over-intense
imposing of their will.

RIGHT LITTLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Doing it wrong!” There are difficulties regarding how to go about dealing

with social communication, connection and commitments, due to
competence concerns or to over-bearingness.

LEFT LITTLE TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

“Motivational problems.” They are experiencing conflicts about whether

and in what form to become involved with and connected to others, due to
inadequacy feelings or to judgementalness and willfulness.

“IN-GROWN” TOE NAIL

“Self-squashing.” They are struggling with worry and guilt about their right
to move forward. They are afraid to take their own direction in life. They
are into power-avoidance, identity-squelching, growth-suppressing and
turning inward.

It is a result of an engulfing dysfunctional family who conveyed that to

“grow away” would be to betray their family. (See the particular toe nail(s)
for more information)

TONGUE PROBLEMS

“I shouldn’t.” They are dealing with guilt over their enjoyment of the realm
of the senses, sexuality, and surface satisfactions like entertainment,
activities and consumption, or about their tastes and preferences.

1038
They were made to feel “bad, wrong and evil” for who they are and what
they like by their rejecting family.

***************************************

“Watch my mouth!” They have an overdeveloped sense of accountability

and responsibility for everything that happens around them, particularly
with regard to what they say. They feel that harm has come from their
speaking out about things.

It arises from their family’s putting them in the “in loco Deity” position, in
which they were subconsciously expected to be the Source of everything. It
was due to their superior equipment as a soul and as a being. The family
then ended up blaming them for all that went wrong.

***************************************

“Karma.” They are reaping the bitter returns of their misuse of the power of
the spoken word by false speaking, lying, gossiping, setups, etc. in past
lives. As a result, they learned this way of functioning again in a family
who did the same. They are now learning to do better next time around.

***************************************

“There is no joy in Bloodville.” They are cut off from the beauty and joy in
life, due to their shut-down to the positives. They are the product of a
grimly survivalist, pessimistic, judgmental and punitive family.

RIGHT TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Moral cretin.” They are experiencing guilt and/or karma for how they
relate to the environment around them, particularly in the realm of the
senses and with the spoken word.

LEFT TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Wrong, bad and evil.” They have shame and self-distrust and/or self-
disgust over their sensual desires and/or over what it is that they wish to
say.

1039
TIP OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Sealed lips.” They are having difficulties related to speaking out. It arises
out of their fear of the consequences of telling it like it is, of experiencing
the play-outs of their saying their piece, and/or of problems in articulating
what they want to say.

FRONT OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Speak no evil.” They have anxieties about what they want or what they
want to say. They fear it will cause harm to them and/or others.

CENTER OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Bad me!” There are conflicts concerning enjoyment and appreciation of

experiences and sensual stimulation, as well as shame around their tastes.

REAR OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“I shouldn’t.” They have issues around receiving, accepting and/or

swallowing what life brings to them.

UNDER THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Shadow-shoving.” They are engaged in systematic avoidance of their

innermost subconscious motivations, feelings and impulses. They strongly
shove underground those inner stirrings which were not acceptable to their
family or to the “world of agreement.”

SIDE OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“What should I do?” They have conflict concerning their role in life,
particularly as to what they say and partake in. It comes from an intensely
socially anxious “What will the neighbors think!?” family culture.

RIGHT SIDE OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“What am I supposed to be?” They are greatly concerned about their role in
the world at large.

1040
LEFT SIDE OF THE TONGUE PROBLEMS

“Motive-questioning.” They are agitatedly unsure of themselves as to the

acceptability of their intentions and motivations.

“THICK” TONGUE

“Scared speechless.” They have the feeling that they are in the midst of a
majorly dangerous situation, and that they must “bite their tongue” to avoid
“setting off World War III.” So they live on “yellow-orange alert” all the
time.

It started in a family in which they got the message loud and clear that they
had better not “upset the apple cart.” They were subjected to much
subterranean, subconscious and subtle attack, against which there was no
defense.

TONSILLITIS

“Expression-anxiety.” They live in fear of expressing themselves, especially

their emotions and their creativity. So they repress and suppress their anger,
fear and other feelings, and they are stifling themselves.

They have a feeling of lost personal potency and of bondage, which results
in considerable “inner crying.” They have much agitated anxiety and
conflict about the intensity of their need to express deep feelings, to release
themselves, and to manifest their creative capabilities.

They are the product of an oppressive patriarchal family who took the old
position that children are to be seen and not heard.

***************************************

“Whim of iron.” They are finding that the reality that they have to swallow
to the effect that they can’t have what they want is causing an intense
irritation, frustration and anger. They are intensely willful and selfish, and
they can’t stand not getting their own way. They are the product of a highly

1041
patriarchal and arrogant family system, and they are a chip off the old
block. (See QUINCY; SORE THROAT; STREP THROAT)

TORPOROUSNESS (Sluggishness, lethargy, amotivational)

“Nothing stirs them.” They are manifesting a demoralization syndrome, and

they are feeling utterly overwhelmed or under-motivated, as a result of
having the experience that they don’t have what it takes to make it in their
current situation or in life in general. Or conversely, they have found that
for them, very little is worth doing or pursuing, because it all goes nowhere.
So they are very slow to start up on or to progress on anything. In either
case, it is a re-experiencing of their destiny-derailing, competence-and
confidence-undermining childhood in a severely dysfunctional family.

TORSO PROBLEMS

“Self-punishment.” They are into intense self-rejection and self-attack, as

reflected in their having difficulties in the part of the body that contains
their internal essence and their “private preserve.” This area is the “core of
the self,” and it is the seat of the emotions, feelings and impulses -- the
“guts” of the persons, their “beingness,” and they find that area totally
unacceptable. Their self-revulsion is the result of severe shame-induction
and denigration by their rejecting family.

RIGHT SIDE OF THE TORSO

“Impact-shame.” They are deeply concerned about the effects they are
having on the world around them.

CENTER OF THE TORSO

“Self-shame.” They have great shame over being who they are, their inner
soul.

LEFT SIDE OF THE TORSO

“Motivation-shame.” They are experiencing severe guilt over their

intentions and desires.

1042
UPPER TORSO

“Shut down.” They have in effect closed off their heart, and they are
therefore rather unconnected to the world and to other people.

LOWER TORSO

“Paranoia.” They live in a good deal of fear most of the time, and they
operate out of a deep-seated distrust of the world and of other people.

TORTICOLLIS (See NECK PROBLEMS)

TOURETTE SYNDROME (Sudden intense shouts and movement, often

involving profanity)

“Shadow burst-outs.” They are subject to outbursts of repressed and

suppressed intense impulses and intentions. It is the result of subtly
oppressive parenting involving much shame-induction, judgementalness
and accusation, often on a subliminal or sub-rosa level.

TOXOPLASMOSIS (Virus that causes inflammation in targeted organs that

is recurrent and degenerative. It is intensified by a compromised immune
system.)

“Running on empty.” They are harboring deep grief and a demoralized

resigned attitude in the making or in their manifestation. They are plagued
by too much sorrow, and by the effect of a significant inequality exchange
with the world, whereby they put out much more than they get.

They also live with chronic uncertainty and confusion as the nature of
reality that arises from a “magical mystery tour” family experience. It led to
a “dance with the second” as the “only way to fly,” with the result that they
are highly susceptible to momentary variations in the stimulation and
situation.

It is the result of having carried the world on their shoulders all their life,
starting with their severely dysfunctional family. They were allowed little or
no ability to receive or to require return in kind. They were told in no

1043
uncertain terms that they were the source of all the family’s problems, while
they were actually being the one deflecting some of the disasters. (See the
organ(s) affected for more information)

TRACHEA PROBLEMS

“Clutching their throat.” They have a lot of anxiety and fear about life, the
world and the Cosmos. Their experience is that it is not safe here, that their
needs are not going to be met, and that they somehow deserve this.

It feels to them that the world is rather like a tornado, where everything is
tossed around violently and randomly. They have little or no trust in the
Cosmos. They feel constantly threatened and that the “breath of life” is
highly fragile, vulnerable and apt to leave them at any time.

They are the product of a severely dysfunctional, chaotic, abrasive family

who were so involved in their “trauma dramas” that the individual was lost
in the mayhem, the shuffle and the upheavals. Their needs were simply not
taken into account.

TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY (TBI) [Caused by having the brain bounce

hard against the skull] (Persistent headaches, difficulty remembering,
trouble concentrating, learning disability, feeling unusually tired, mood
changes, ringing in the ears, confusion, irritability, dis-inhibition,
exaggerated startle reactions, learning problems handling crowds,
sometimes violent confrontations with people in more severe cases.)

“Brain bruise.” Their feeling is, “What happened to my mind/self!?”

Coping has become overwhelming to them, and they have lost their sense of
center, stability and groundedness. They feel threatened and/or intensely
challenged by life’s demands and realities all of a sudden, and the world
feels unsafe, with a looming possibility of there being no more joy in their
life.

They are freaked out, and they are intensely alarmed by the implications
and ramifications of their condition. They are having a profound emotional
reaction to this. It is composed of feelings of falling apart, self-
blame/shame, grief, anxiety, fear, despair and rage.

1044
It is caused by events so intense, severe, and at some level inexplicable and
unjustifiable, that the whole thing has been stored in the “older” brain
systems related to sheer survival issues. The result is the “automatic pilot”
activation of all these very strong reactions, leading to further self-doubt,
confusion and fear.

There are also caught up in a “What was THAT!” and “What does THAT
mean!?” pattern, in which they are handicapped by a pronounced propensity
to respond with generalized anxiety or fearfulness, with all the associated
patterns of functioning in reaction to common stimuli and situations.

Improvement and the recovery process are dependent upon the trauma not
being a repetition or representation of an abusive/traumatic childhood
history. In the absence of this complication, the usual response is a digging
into their internal and external resources to engage in a rather strongly
motivated and effective rehabilitation.

If, however, there are detrimental psychodynamic reactivations involved, it

will require immediate and ongoing therapy so that the rehabilitation
process can proceed without counter-motivations, fear-overwhelm,
immobilization by depression and/or rage-aholic patterns.

*************************************

“Who’s in charge here!?” They are in deep conflict with their “Higher Self”
and/or the “Divine Authority,” a conflict in which THEY want to be the one
running the show. They feel denied, humiliated and undermined/prevented,
and they are full of rage and despair about everything involved in this, from
the occurrence and nature of the trauma to all of its play-outs. They have
had authority conflict problems all their life, either internally and/or
externally/behaviorally. It has now “come to a head.”

They are the product of an authoritarian patriarchal family in which they

were perennially butting their head against the authority system, or they
were programmed to go into conflict with authority as a means of
preventing their success in life as a hidden agenda on the part of the family,
the mother in particular.

1045
 **************************************

“God is Al Capone!” They are feeling betrayed, devastated and over-

demanded and reactively furious. Their experience is that they have been
abandoned by the “Home Office.” (All that Is). As they see it, there is a
serious case of crossed purposes between their personal goals and the
Divine Intent, and they are extremely anxious/worried and resentful as a
result. There is a profound inner conflict within their operational ego and/or
between the desires and intentions of the personality and their perception of
their unfolding destiny.

They feel completely caught up in some sort of “glitch in the Cosmic

computer,” such that they are, in effect, a totally innocent bystander who
got clobbered by whatever negatives are happening as a part of the Divine
Design.

Or they have the feeling that the “Home Office” (All that Is) has taken the
helm against their will and desires, and that they therefore unable to manage
their life. They feel completely at the mercy of the Moral Order, the
Judgmental Universe and an Angry God. This reaction to the trauma and its
aftermath as a result of a family history in which a lot didn’t make sense,
and yet it was justified in one form another as being “God’s Will” or the
equivalent.

They are the product of a significantly dysfunctional family who did not
respond to their needs or in which they were forced to take over the meeting
of their own needs because no one else would. As a result, they developed
an abiding distrust of the Cosmos.

***************************************

“Who’s in charge here!?” They are in deep conflict with their “Higher Self”
and/or the “Divine Authority,” a conflict in which THEY want to be the one
running the show. They feel denied, humiliated and undermined/prevented,
and they are full of rage and despair about everything involved in this, from
the occurrence and nature of the trauma to all of its play-outs. They have
had authority conflict problems all their life, either internally and/or
externally/behaviorally. It has now “come to a head.”

1046
They are the product of an authoritarian patriarchal family in which they
were perennially butting their head against the authority system, or they
were programmed to go into conflict with authority as a means of
preventing their success in life as a hidden agenda on the part of the family,
the mother in particular.

***************************************

“No driver of the vehicle.” The trauma has knocked out their “executive
self” system, and there is something of a “comprehension collapse” that has
disrupted their ability to accept, organize, store, integrate and interpret
information for purposes of running their life.

They are having a profound emotional and disorganized/disoriented

reaction to this. There is simultaneously a release of subconscious, shadow-
shoved or suppressed emotional/motivational/cognitive distortion processes
which they are trying to “sit on.”

They have an over-riding sense of powerlessness, helplessness and

hopelessness in the face of overwhelming odds and of on-rushing disaster.
They feel immobilized and completely done in by the world, and that they
utterly are unable to do anything about it.

They also have a strong belief in their not being good enough, with much
self-intolerance, self-rejection, and self-destructive potential. In addition,
their experience is that if they encounter something that is beyond their
coping capabilities, they are in over their head and any attempts to improve
the situation just makes it all the worse, in an “escalating disaster” pattern.

They have the conviction that they are totally unfit for Divine acceptance,
and that they are consistently failing in their desperate efforts to use
atonement to alleviate their severe chronic shame and their “evilness,” as
they seek the “God Housekeeping Seal of Approval.”

It has in effect completely demoralized them, and that in turn is generating

“waiting for rigor mortis” resignedly inactive pattern. They seek to keep the
damage down as much as possible as their lifestyle.

1047
They have no sense of being able to impact or to protect themselves, and
they feel that if they can’t kill themselves, at least they can make
themselves as small as possible to avoid notice and devastation.

It is the result of having grown up in an extremely pervasively

dysfunctional family. There was also a great deal of sexual guilt-inducing
by an over-possessively rejecting and wrong-making mother, along with
severe maternal deprivation.

They were denigrated and told they could do no right, while at the same
time they were being universally turned to with demands, blame and
restrictions, in a never-ending barrage. They were in effect subjected to
unrelentingly ruthless and utterly unpredictable and uncontrollable subtle
rage-based attacking parenting in which there was no response possible.

*************************************

“Woe is me!” They are a “professional victim” who turns everything to

their selfish advantage in a master manipulator pattern. They are brilliantly
effective at taking advantage of the many things that are involved in dealing
with Traumatic Brain Injury. It’s the jackpot for life, as far as they are
concerned.

They are martyr-tripping, “Jewish mothering,” “Why me, God!?”-ing,

supremely opportunistic, massively draining of energy, time and resources,
audience-demanding, worming, cheating and continuously righteously self-
justifying. They are in effect an advancing steamroller in their impact on the
environment and the people and systems around them.

And many such individuals have a boiling cauldron of indiscriminate

vengeance-vendetta rage in which they subtly slyly and passive-
aggressively make life miserable for everyone around them in a “share the
misery” pattern.

They are the product of a mutually manipulative and parasitic, severely

selfish, and dysfunctional family in which there is an enormous
undercurrent of seething fury of the “Somebody’s Gonna PAY for this!” and
“I gotta right, given what I have to endure!” attitude and tactics. And you

1048
open yourself to life in hell if you ever try to give feedback or to correct the
situation.

*************************************

“Devil incarnate.” This the “sick McMurphy” and the “Milo Minder-
Bender” type of situation in which a psychopath takes advantage of every
opportunity to precipitate a riot, carry out a vendetta, lash out
indiscriminately, and make a personal bonanza at the expense of everyone
and everything in sight, including colluding with and selling to the enemy,
such as ambulance-chasers, criminals, psychotic relative-triggering, black
marketing, supplies and equipment stealing, etc.

They are the product of a totally amoral and exploitative/abusive family

system in which it was “everyone for themselves and damn the
consequences!” -- with a “What can I get out of this?” value system.

Or they ended up falling between the cracks of a severely dysfunctional and

self-immersed family, where they learned the tricks of the trade between the
lines, so to speak. In any case, it is utterly untouchable, and all you can do
is to confine and restrict them as much as possible.

“TRAVELER’S THROMBOSIS;” “ECONOMY CLASS SYNDROME,”

“DEEP VEIN THROMBOSIS” OR DVT (Blood clots in the legs that can
even become fatal while on a plane.)

“Pulling the world in over their heads.” They have an intensely

conservative and restrictive reaction to life. They are resisting change and
expansion, closing down on the flow of joy and growth in their life. Change
usually meant things got considerably worse when they were a child, and
their subsequent experience has done little to change that impression.

**************************************

“Love retard.” There is a blocking off of self-love, the ability to express

love to others, and the capacity to receive love. They are feeling neglected,
abandoned and/or unacceptable, due to the lack or loss of love in their life.
They cling to or to hold on to love for fear of its moving away or of our

1049
moving away from it. It is the result of an emotionally-depriving early
environment.

TREMBLING (Frequently)

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are deeply afraid of disastrous events about to

do them in. They feel very much at effect and at risk in the world most of
the time. They come from an unpredictably and devastatingly dysfunctional
family in which awful things did routinely happen. There may well have
been severe violence and abuse as well.

**************************************

“Wreak-freak.” They are experiencing intense “run amok-anxiety” about

what they might do if they “let fly with one.” It often has intense rage
underlying it. This, in turn, is an indignation-outrage reaction to being
subjected to felt undeserved violation and deprivation as a child in their
severely dysfunctional family -- and again now.

TREMOR (Constant low-key shaking)

“Cosmic paranoia.” They have an intensely anxious relationship with the

Universe that is full of fear, uncertainty and insecurity. They have a “God
will KILL me if I do anything different!” feeling. They have ended up
feeling stagnant and immobilized. They have little faith in the Universe and
in life, and they feel alone and unsafe in an uncaring world.

It is the result of a very rigid adaptation to a severely dysfunctional and

frightening family who themselves manifested a very fearfully narrow
viewpoint and lifestyle. They played the role of the “family hoist” -- the one
who was the pivot point of everything.

**************************************

“I don’t dare let go!” There is an overwhelming desire to control everything

and everyone about every aspect of every issue, situation and undertaking.
They have the complete conviction that all hell will break loose and that

1050
everything will go down the tubes unless they personally hands-on
determine the purpose, process and outcome of everything.

They were the “sane one” in an out-of-control self-defeating, ungrounded

and potentially self-destructive family. Without their interventions, things
WOULD have gone over the edge into catastrophic disaster.

**************************************

“Annihilation-anxiety.” They are deeply afraid of disastrous events about to

do them in. They feel very much “at effect,” rather than “at cause,” and they
are in a state of continuous alarm as they feel profoundly at risk all the time.
They come from an unpredictably and devastatingly dysfunctional family in
which awful things did routinely happen. There may well have been severe
violence and abuse as well.

**************************************

“Wreak-freak.” They are experiencing intense “run amok-anxiety” about

what they might do if they “let fly with one” or if they “let themselves loose
on the world.” It often has an intense rage underlying it.

This rage is the massive indignation-outrage reaction to being subjected to

felt completely undeserved violation and deprivation as a child in their
severely dysfunctional and destructively self-immersed family.

“TRENCH MOUTH” (Severe stress-precipitated intense gingivitis and

infection of the gums) [It got its name from the outcomes of trench warfare
in WWI.]

“Overwhelmed.” They feel severely out-classed and over-run by life. They

have the experience that they lack the resources to handle things, and they
also believe that the world is going out of its way to traumatize and
persecute them.

They feel intensely vulnerable, unable to cope, and severely deprived in a

learned helplessness and intense resentment reaction to the course of their

1051
life. They grew up in a dysfunctional and chaotic crisis-courting family who
had no time or energy for them.

TRICHINOSIS (Fever, nausea, diarrhea and muscle pains from worms in

pork. Often lethal)

“Can’t cope.” They feel in over their head, that things have gotten out of
hand, that they don’t have what it takes to handle their situation. They have
a lot of agitated worry and hurry, in fear of anticipated outcomes. They are
intensely fearful, and they want to run off.

They want to be rid of the whole thing, and to give their power to others, to
let them take over everything. They are afraid of the “ultimate blow it,” out
of a profound competence-anxiety. They have now reached the point where
they just don’t have the confidence to carry it off any more. They were the
“family hoist,” and at the same time they were the “family scapegoat,” and
they were made to feel totally responsible for the welfare of the family.

**********************************

“Desert island.” There is severe internal conflict and lack of harmony

arising from a deep-seated fear of abandonment and of the loss of support
systems. They were put on highly conditional acceptance as a child, with
the implied threat of abandonment hanging in the air all though childhood.

**********************************

“Let me be!” They have an underlying passivity and desire not to be

bothered with the requirements and responsibilities of life. They want to be
left alone and to be taken care of. They were over-indulged and under-
required in their enmeshed family.

**********************************

“Revolting development.” They are intensely disgusted with, angered by,

and frightened about this turn of events in their life. They feel personally
responsible for it. It is the result of having had to take accountability for
everything that happened in their family.

1052
TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA (See FACE NERVE PAINS, SEVERE)

TRIGLYCERIDES, HIGH (Difficulty processing fats and sugars)

“Love/joy-incompetent.” They have difficulties in integrating and

expressing love and joy in their life. They don’t believe that they deserve
positive experiences at a deep underlying level. It is a low self-esteem
process. They had rather intense acceptance/rejection ambivalence from
their family as they were growing up.

**********************************

“Life sucks!” They have the feeling that they have lost their enjoyment in
living. They are harboring a good deal of resentment about their quality of
life. They are the product of a dysfunctional family in which they were the
“responsible one” who had to sacrifice their joy to the altar of family-
rescue.

**********************************

“I-me-mine.” They are rather intensely egocentric and narcissistic in their

functioning. Their underlying attitude is that the world doesn’t come
through for them. They come from a self-immersed and selfish family who
had little concern for their impact on the ecology.

“TRIPLE WARMER” PROBLEMS (A meridian coordination center in the

heart area -- Oriental medicine.)

“Unbalanced.” They are out of sync with themselves in their manifestation,

in that some parts of them are given free license, while others are
suppressed or unexpressed. It was an adaptation to an equally unbalanced
dysfunctional family.

TUBAL PREGNANCY (Located in the fallopian tube)

“What are YOU doing here?!” They are intensely ambivalent or rejecting of
being pregnant, of being pregnant in these circumstances, and/or of being

1053
pregnant with this child. The result is that the fertilization happened outside
the womb.

This rare and dangerous occurrence reflects either the massive intent of the
soul of the child and/or of the Universe to have this pregnancy occur
despite, or perhaps even because of, the mother’s intense resistance (for the
soul’s destiny purposes).

TUBERCULOSIS

“Bitter resentfulness.” They are wasting away, due to selfishness, intense

possessiveness, cruel thoughts, and vengefulness. They are determined to
have their own way, as a false consolation for the harsh realities of their life.
They feel that they have done their level best in a valiant effort, but that
circumstances just wouldn’t have it so.

They had unhappy love affairs, resulting in bitterness, disappointment,

resentment, unforgivingness and clutchingness. They feel unappreciated,
and they play out a “Camille” scenario, in which their feeling is, “They’ll
be sorry when I’m gone!”

They are given to resentfully-imagined guilt and remorse reactions from

their people. In addition, there is also a large spiteful revenge streak playing
a major part in this process. They are selfishly clinging and controlling, they
are slyly passive-aggressive, and they are full of “Feel sorry for me!”
strategies. In the meantime, they are seeking an “easeful death.”

It is the result of their having had a “special” role as a child in their severely
passive-aggressive dysfunctional family, and they have never gotten over or
relinquished it.

TUBEROUS SCLEROSIS (Degenerative connective tissue disorder)

“What am I doing here?” They are manifesting a dismayed

discombobulation about the world and the way their life is going. It is the
result of growing up in a vaguely overwhelmed and enmeshed family or out
of being here as a “visitor” from another soul pool for soul experience and
destiny-manifestation purposes.

1054
 *************************************

“Hapless, helpless, hopeless.” They have a great deal of sorrow, deep-seated

grief, and despair, and they are chronically crying on the inside. They feel
overwhelmed and unable to handle the requirements of life. They have in
effect “thrown in the towel” on even trying to make it in life. They come
from a massively dysfunctional and demoralizing family.

*************************************

“Allergic reaction to themselves.” They feel somehow responsible for all

the ills of the world, that they are the cause. They are having a “get rid of
the problem” reaction to themselves.

It is a result of having “carried the world on their shoulders” all their life,
starting with their dysfunctional family. They ended up with little or no
ability to receive or to request or to require a return in kind. They were told
in effect that they were the source of all the family’s problems, while they
were actually the only one who was deflecting some of the disasters.

TUMOR(S)

“Cosmic victimization.” They are holding on to thought patterns and

attitudes that have been ignored and no dealt with for a long time, and they
can now no longer appropriately be held onto or ignored. They feel
victimized by the Universe, and they see no way out of it. It feels like it is
either justified punishment or the capricious nature of the Universe for them
to be forever entrapped in re-runs of the old traumas.

They want to grow, but they feel utterly unable to do so. They feel utterly
powerless, and that they just have to accept the way it is. They have a lot of
remorse and regrets, and they have the experience that no one cares about
them. They are operating out of a hapless, helpless, hopeless orientation.
They are the product of an exploitative, abusive and oppressive
dysfunctional family.

*************************************

1055
“How Dare they!?” They are nursing old wounds and shocks, and they are
building up intense resentment. They have many unresolved rages and
hatreds, they refuse to forgive and forget. They have an inflated sense of
their importance and worth, and they are prideful and bitterly disgusted
with the human race. This nihilistic disdainfulness trip comes from their
having grown up in a bitterly dysfunctional and intractable family. (See the
body part(s) affected for more information)

“TWITCHING” (Sudden involuntary gross motor movements)

“Twisted itches.” They are suppressing actions and feelings to the point
where it leads to stress. They fear letting go or letting people know their
feelings, lest all hell break loose or they get strung from the yardarm. They
come from a severely dysfunctional family in which “a slip of the lip could
sink the ship” -- in actuality.

TYPHOID FEVER (Severe fever, diarrhea)

“Fed up.” Things are moving too fast, and they are taking a direction that
brings up all kinds of intense anger and stored resentments. They are
intensely internally conflicted, and they want to get out of the situation
somehow.

They want to get this over with as quickly as possible, and they feel “left in
the lurch holding the bag -- again!” They feel overwhelmed by things, and
their experience is that no one cares or ever has. It is the result of “keep ‘em
around the old homestead” parenting in which they were expected to take
care of everything.

TYPHUS FEVER (Fever, red eruptions, weakness, nervous disorders)

“Under siege.” They feel besieged and restricted on all sides, and they feel
unsafe, betrayed, rejected and attacked. They have concluded that they can’t
be themselves, because that is somehow “bad, wrong and evil.”

At the same time, they are burning up with intense anger and stored
resentments about how they are treated, and they are quite self-disgusted for

1056
having elicited this environmental reaction. To top it all off, they are
intensely abandonment-anxious as well.

This is all the result of a self-immersed, convenience-concerned, wrong-

making and suppressive family.

Section 20

1057
1058
T

504

1059
T

505

1060
506

507

508

509

510

511

512

513

1061
514

515

516

517

518

519

520

521

522

1062
523

524

525

526

527

528

529

530

1063
531

532

533

534

535

536

537

538

539

1064
540

541

542

543

544

545

546

547

1065
548

549

550

551

552

1066
ULCERATED LARYNX (Backed up stomach acid burning the larynx)

“The British are coming!” They are in deep conflict about speaking (or
singing) out. They have consistently found that when they do so, they
receive large amounts of attack and unjustified criticism. At the same time,
they have a profound sense of responsibility to communicate the truth and
what they are aware of.

The result is a generalized rage over not being able to express themselves in
the world, coupled with anxiety over the fact that if they don’t communicate
the truth, all hell will break loose, as they experience it. They feel
responsible and accountable for what will come out of the present situation,
yet at the same time, they feel that their hands are effectively tied. And they
in turn are “fit to be tied.”

It is an old, familiar story that got started in their dysfunctional family, in

which they were the only one who saw and knew what was happening,
what was coming, and what was needed. They kept trying to convey
desperately important realities -- to no avail.

ULCERATED SPOTS ON THE SKIN (Eroded holes, open sores)

“Inferiority complex.” They have feelings of low self-esteem, along with a

sense of ostracism and obstruction. They are ashamed of themselves, and
they are troubled by their unlovely thoughts about others that have arisen
out of their life history. They have a lot of anxiety and fear from old, buried
“gukky stuff,” including from past lives. To make matters worse, they have
strong longings which can’t be realized at present.

At the base of all this is a conflict between their desire for affection, on the
one hand, and their fear of being hurt if it is sought, on the other.
Underpinning all this is a tendency to be unwilling to forgive and forget the
past. They have a notable lack of peace and harmony in their life, and they
feel continuously uneasy and threatened by the world.

All of this is an outcome of being a “sensitive” in a severely denial-

dominated dysfunctional family who used and abused them.

1067
ULCERATIVE COLITIS (Lining-damaging inflammation of the large
intestine)

“Hands-on control.” They are rather intensely alarmed about things getting
out of hand, and they are prone to obsessive-compulsive patterns. It results
in their being indecisive, detail-fixated, decision-anxious.

They are excessively conforming, and they suppress themselves out of fear
of ostracism, rejection and retribution. They feel like they are being
martyred, and they have a good deal of resentment and anger about that.
However, they don’t dare express it. They come from a suppressive, rigid,
patriarchal family.

***************************************

“Guilty unlovability.” They have a great need to be loved that is prevented

fulfillment by self-punishing self-deprivation for presumed transgressions
that the outside world is unaware of. There is desperation for affection that
they never got; this resulted in self-denigration and pessimism.

They are over-conscientious and hyper-sensitively over-conscientious, with

false feelings of accountability and moral culpability. They are a self-
defeating “loser” out of an emotionally immature attitude of self-destruction
for their “evilness.”

There is a considerable feeling of undue burdens, emotional strain, and

loneliness. They are apt to go off into a frenzy of self-recrimination in
reaction to rejection of love from a dear one. They are very insecure, and
they have an intensely difficult time letting go of that which is over and
done with. It came from over-exacting parents who imposed an experience
of severe oppression, over-responsibility and defeat.

***************************************

“Get out of my life!” They feel injured and degraded by some external
malignant force. They want to eliminate the responsible agent. They feel
humiliated, and they want to dispose of it NOW! They are bursting with
unexpressed rage, and they are super-self-suppressing out of “run amok-

1068
anxiety.” They are in perfectionistic denial of the realities that they are
maintaining a “conspiracy of silence” about, and which they studiously
avoid looking at.

They are basically a sensitive, bright, timid, dependent, Pollyannaishly

denying, and passive person who is reluctant to take life on. They are
indecisive, ingratiating, immature, and impotent. Underneath, they are
fulminatingly furious about both their incapacity and their situation.

They are the product of a dysfunctional family in which the mother was
dominating and repressive and the father was passive and jealous. There
were many miseries and health hassles in the family, and yet it was a “tight
little island” from which there was no escape.

ULCERS

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have a well-ingrained habit of

fearfulness, anxiety and tension. They are forever agitated about the
possibility of calamity hitting them. They worry about details, and they are
intensely competence-anxious about their ability to cope.

They have a fearsome strong belief that they are “not good enough,” and
they worry a lot about their “inferiority.” They are guilt-grabbing, doubt-
dominated, and agitatedly anxious all the time. The pressures of their felt
responsibilities are in effect too much for them to handle. Their family was
simultaneously perfectionistically expecting and denigrating of their every
effort.

***************************************

“Yearning for love.” They have severe abandonment and betrayal feelings,
along with pronounced dependency and separation-anxiety, some of which
is derived from past lives. They are desperate for mothering, but they feel
that they have to “earn” it with “achieve-aholic” accomplishments.

They are trying their damnedest to do enough to “deserve” the nurturance

they so desperately desire, yet they are at the same time feeling the load of
excessive responsibility and a lot of anxiety about failing to pull it all off.

1069
They are the product of an agitatedly anxious and catastrophizing family in
which they were placed in a position of responsibility that was way over
their head.

***************************************

“Burning resentment.” They are under a great deal of strain due to the
conflict between their desire to be seen as earning their support on the one
hand, and their deep-seated rage at having to do so, on the other.

They are frustrated, angry and hostile about their whole situation, and they
are undergoing a lot of stress, anxiety, agitation and upset due to too many
demands. They have as a result great difficulty assimilating their
experiences.

They are deeply frustrated at the way things don’t go their way, and they are
seeking revenge. As a result, they go into “Reggie the Raging Room-
wrecker” rage-aholic reactions, and they are resentful, fault-finding and
judgmental. The entire process is “eating away” at them.

The whole pattern started in a withholding and depriving household in

which they had to take on too much responsibility too early, and in which
they had to “earn their breakfast.”

UMBILICAL HERNIA (Bulging inner organ through the belly button)

“Power issues.” They feel prevented from accessing their personal potency
and/or they are afraid to access their personal power, community clout, and
initiative impact-making capabilities. It is the result of being reacted to as
being threatening and/or “evil” when they did so as a child.

***************************************

“Cut off from the Universe.” They feel somehow rejected by God. They
assume that they are getting their “Cosmic just desserts,” and this
conclusion has carried into their life as the foundational assumption out of
which they operate. It started in an at least ambivalent, if not a hostile

1070
womb experience. It is essentially a destiny design feature for purposes of
karma-burning, experience-expanding, and/or special training.

***************************************

“Powder keg.” They are a ball of rage about to go off, and they have a good
deal of “run amok-anxiety,” with a frantic effort to control their anger. They
do so by pretending it isn’t there, in an ostrich-like stance, which only
generates events and outcomes that feed the volcano inside. It ultimately
ends up erupting through their power center and their connection to the
Universe.

They have been intensely frustrated in their relations with the world since
the beginning, with their suppressive and repressive mother.

UNCONTROLLABLE RESPONSES FROM THE CENTRAL NERVOUS

SYSTEM

“Overwhelm!” They are having intense reverberation reactions to a severely

threatening and/or traumatic set of circumstances. Their limits of ability
have been far exceeded, and their whole operating system is flailing away
desperately, in a frantic attempt to regain some semblance of sanity and
solubility to their situation.

It arises from having been required to live at the extreme edge in a situation
that in effect pushed them to expand their abilities continuously, with
profound stakes involved, all through their childhood. The family depended
on them as their lifeline, and they responded by rising to the challenge at all
costs. Now they have reached the point where “This is an up with which I
can no longer put!”

UNCOORDINATED INVOLUNTARY MOVEMENTS

“Oh no you don’t!” They have crossed the “forbidden line” into self-
commitment and destiny-manifestation, and a long-ago implanted
injunction to the effect of, “If you ever violate this taboo, a hex on you!”
from their family has gone off. They were to never to abandon the family

1071
by bonding with relevant others, by developing their capacities, or by
moving into manifestation of their purpose.

UNDER-ACTIVE ADRENALS

“Emotional malnutrition.” They have a lot of anger at themselves that is

resulting in and which comes from severe non-support. They feel that they
are “alone on a desert island,” with no sustenance from anyone. It has the
effect of “pulling the plug” on their motivational system, and they are
ending up effectively an amotivational “couch potato.” Their family was
intensely accusatory and depriving.

UNDERWEIGHT IN INFANCY

“Untrustworthy environment.” They have fear, tension, anxiety and a

feeling of things being most unsettled. They feel that the world is not a safe
place, and that they will be betrayed and attacked. Their “emotional body”
feels somehow responsible for all the ills of the world, that they are all
alone on their own, and that they somehow deserve it, because “God said
so.” They are deeply frustrated and angry with themselves, but they don’t
know what to do about it, they feel totally unequipped to try, and they are
afraid to express or to let go of it.

It is the result of an inflamed family environment that is saturated with

silent or not-so-silent yelling, arguments, and screams of despair. They have
gotten lost in the belligerence, and they feel severely neglected, with a
resulting grief-strickenness. They have incorporated the conflictual
environment, and they are at war with themselves.

UNDETECTABLE PULSE (See MISSING PULSE)

“UNDULANT FEVER” (Recurring fever, enlarged spleen, joint pains,

sweating)

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have very little trust in the Universe, and
they are quite unhappy and emotionally unbalanced. There is a certain
rigidity and resistance to change, and they are burning up with intense
resentment about their situation.

1072
Bottom line, they don’t feel safe in the world, and they are very angry about
the way things are happening in their life. This has resulted in a constant
“prediction and preparation for disaster” pattern. All of this started in an
unpredictable and unstable dysfunctional family in which there were
constant difficulties. They feel that this is their lot in life, and that they
somehow have to handle it.

UPPER HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“Incompetence in living.” They are having difficulties in dealing with the

environment. They display a lack of strength and fortitude, and they
manifest poor self-support. There is a deficiency in their ability to think for
themselves, to perceive things, to express themselves, to communicate, to
socialize, to assert themselves, to take action and to manifest in the world.

They are under-achieving, inward-oriented, involvement-avoidant, and

withdrawn. They place great store and significance with their intimates and
their intimate environment -- the things they can influence directly. They are
heavily impacted by any intimate experience influences, including reading
and the media.

They were systematically competence-and confidence-undermined, and

they found interpersonal interaction was far too painful and dangerous for
them to handle in their dysfunctional and demoralizing family.

UPSET STOMACH

“Hey, just a minute!” They are alarmed and possibly revolted by what is
happening to them. They find the whole idea thoroughly unpleasant, and
they can’t stomach it. They are having big implication reactions about what
might happen as a result of what is going down. They have great guilt about
sexuality, success, personal power, identity-development, self-
manifestation, destiny-furthering, intimacy, and all manner of other “family
betrayals.” And the current situation is tapping into these fears and feelings.

This could all lead to a most unpleasant ending, and they feel somehow
responsible for it. They tend to feel personally accountable for everything
that happens, particularly the negative outcomes. Their family relied on

1073
them heavily, and they gave them the message loud and clear that they have
no right to commit elsewhere.

***************************************

“Stones in the stomach.” They are under a responsibility-overload that is

leading to tension, fear, dread and anxiety. They are over-compensating for
their dependency needs, and that leads to their frantic pushing of ideas and
projects on themselves and others.

They have conflicting ideas about what would be ego-enhancing, and as a

result, they have an inability to assimilate new experiences and ideas. They
are being overwhelmed with fear, excitement and implication-anxiety. They
feel that this is their lot in life, and that they somehow have to handle it.

This has resulted in a constant “prediction and preparation for disaster”

pattern. They are also experiencing a considerable amount of resentment,
with a resulting misuse of their mind power for critical judgementalness,
griping and grudging. The feeling is that others are deliberately trying to
cause disruptions. This in turn generates guilt and more tension. It all got
started in a dysfunctionally dependent family system in which they were the
“responsible one,” and they are still living it out.

UREMIA (Poisoning from urinary substances in the blood)

“Pissed off at the Universe.” They have a need to get rid of something in
their life, to clear out toxic things, situations, people and environments from
their life. However, they have a fundamental lack of love for themselves
which prevents them from doing this effectively.

They have a fearful orientation towards the world, and they therefore take a
conservative and cautionary approach that results in their hanging on to old
ideas, and in their being afraid of letting go. They have an underlying
intense abandonment-resentment.

They have the distinct feeling that nothing new is going to make any
difference, so they clutch to the “tried and true.” The trouble is that it is

1074
exactly the “bad old ways” that are now getting them in trouble. This whole
pattern got started in a restrictive and depriving dysfunctional family.

URETHRA PROBLEMS; URINARY TRACT PROBLEMS

“Cope-ability anxiety.” They are chronically alarmed that they may not
have what it takes to make it. They have the feeling that they are somehow
inadequate to the cause. They are therefore generally anxious all the time.
They are the product of a competence-and confidence-undermining
possessive family who wanted to “keep ‘em around the old homestead.”

***************************************

“Sexual fearfulness.” The whole erotic realm “sends them up the skimmer
handle.” They feel that they can never win and that they always lose and are
hurt in this arena. It is the result of being sexualized and sex-ploitated in a
seductive-destructive “seduce-slap” type of parenting pattern in which they
were enticed and then attacked for being both attractive and responsive by
their parent (usually the mother) in their dysfunctional family.

URINARY TRACT INFECTION(S); URETHRITIS

“Downloading time.” There is a need to get rid of something in their life --

they are desperately trying to clear the toxic things, situations and people
out of their life. They feel the necessity for the release of pressure.
However, their lack of self-love makes this a quite difficult undertaking.
They come from a severely dysfunctional family who held them
accountable for all their misery.

***************************************

“Hunker down in the bunker.” They have a fearful orientation towards the
world, along with a cautionary conservative approach which results in their
hanging on to old ideas and in their being afraid of letting go. They are
lacking in adaptability, and they have a fear of change, because they don’t
believe that anything new would work on their behalf.

1075
They have a certain difficulty with inner direction arising from the fear that
if they have any hopes, they will prove to be false and they “will blow up in
their face.” They are the product of a demoralizingly dysfunctional family
in which any efforts to improve the situation only made things far worse.

***************************************

“Abandonment-anticipation.” They have a strong underlying abandonment-

anxiety and a resulting tendency to dependent attachment and to
vulnerability-avoidance at the same time their experience has to suppress
resentment over vulnerability and abandonment-anticipation. They also
have the feeling that their need for love is unfulfilled and unfulfillable, with
the result that they are prone to depression. They have a fair amount of guilt
and grief, arising from a severely suppressive and non-supportive
childhood.

***************************************

“Cope-ability-anxious.” They have a lack of self-confidence, and they feel

insufficient to the cause. They feel tired, and that they are “running on
empty.” There is poor endurance and a considerable amount of inner
agitation and irritation. There is very little basic trust that things are going
to go well for them, and they are deeply unhappy.

It is a pattern that got started in a rigidly denial-dominated and bitter

dysfunctional family who would systematically see to it that anything they
got would be destroyed or removed, out of a generalized envy and alarm
reaction to the individual’s (to them) incomprehensible capabilities and
potentialities. They intended to “keep ‘em around the old homestead” as
their “private preserve” and their “whipping kid.”

***************************************

“Ethical problems.” They are having deep conflicts about their ability to
manifest their values and priorities. It arises from a non-comprehending,
dysfunctional, incompetencing, belittling and/or accusatory family.

***************************************

1076
“Royally pissed off.” They are thoroughly enraged at their life, and they
don’t trust the Universe one iota. They are full of resentment, blame and
angry emotions, and they feel betrayed. They are looking for who is
responsible for all their troubles, trials and tribulations.

Much of their venom is directed at their intimates, especially those of the

other gender. They feel that the parent of the other gender is the cause of all
their problems. However, underneath all this is the uneasy feeling that they
are really just getting their “just desserts.” This whole pattern came about as
a result of their being sexualized and sex-ploitated in a seductive-
destructive “tantalizing tarantula” -- “seduce-slap” and accusatory manner.

URGE URINARY INCONTINENCE (“Nature screams!”); URINATING

TOO FREQUENTLY “Gotta go!!”

“Scared pissless.” They feel alone on their own in an indifferent and

potentially dangerous and/or hostile world. They are therefore on chronic
“yellow alert” in a “hockey goalie” mentality. They feel that they’re all
they’ve got, and that “One strike and I’m out!” It is the result of having had
to fend for themselves with no help from any friends from a very early age.

UTERUS PROBLEMS

“I don’t dare.” She feels that it is not safe for her to manifest her creativity
or her generativity, and she therefore distrusts and has disgust towards such
undertakings. She fears rejection, abandonment and attack, along with envy,
jealousy and retaliation.

She has real problems with her mother, as a result of the mother’s
capitulation or cooperation with what went down in her family. It comes
from her experience in a patriarchal and dysfunctional family, in which the
feminine and the creative were greatly feared and devalued.

UTERINE CANCER

“Martyr trip.” She feels victimized by the Universe and by God (Who is a
male, in her experience). She has a great deal of “tripod rage” -- the
irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs.

1077
She is plagued with a huge amount of repressed rage, and she is prone to
severe passive-aggressiveness and to subtle subterranean subconscious
sabotage. They are constantly irritated and enraged by others, particularly
males, and especially by her male intimate.

They are the product of a repressedly rageful and patriarchy-hating mother,

usually with a highly ineffectual and enraging father. (See CANCER;
GENITAL PROBLEMS -- FEMALE; OVARY PROBLEMS; VAGINAL
PROBLEMS; VULVA PROBLEMS)

Section 21

1078
U

1079
553

1080
U

554

555

1081
556

557

558

559

560

1082
VACCINATION REACTION

“It hurts so good.” They are an “atonement-freak” who is convinced that

they are “bad, wrong and evil,” and who feels that they need punishment for
their “sins and sinfulness.” They are the product of a severely shame-and
guilt-inducing accusative and exploitative dysfunctional family.

VAGINAL PROBLEMS

“Self-rejection.” She has many worries over not being good enough, along
with self-denigration and self-disgust. She doesn’t trust her feminine
receptivity, and she won’t surrender to herself. She also has a fear of sex
and sexual desire, along with a fear of procreativity and vulnerability.

It is the result of an intrusively controlling, sex-ploitative and “never

enough” withholding and judgmental father.

*********************************

“Tripod-rage.” They have an intense urge to kick anything with three legs.
It was generated originally by an equally misanthropic mother, but
revalidated by an abusive and sex-ploitative father and by the patriarchal
culture.

PAINFUL VAGINAL SPASMS; VAGINISMUS; VAGINITIS

“Womb-rage.” They have intense anger at the whole business of being a

female. There is a goodly amount of “tripod-rage” (an intense urge to kick
anything with three legs) directed at the whole patriarchy, but particularly
towards their mate. But bottom line, it is reflective of a severe self-rejection
and self-punishment coming out of sexual guilt. They are the product of a
femininity-devaluing patriarchal family.

***************************************

“I don’t cut it.” They have worries over not being good enough, along with
self-denigration and self-disgust. They don’t trust their feminine receptivity.
They also have a fear of sex and sexual desire, along with a fear of

1083
procreativity and vulnerability. It is the result of an intrusively controlling,
sex-ploitative and “never good enough” withholding and judgmental father.

VAGINAL WHITE DISCHARGE

“Tripod-rage.” She is full of the irresistible urge to kick anything with three
legs, and of patriarchy-paranoia. She believes that women are oppressed by
the other gender to such a degree that they end up being powerless with
them. This may well translate into rage at her spouse. It can also be
accompanied by a co-opting rejection of the feminine.

It was originally infused by her furiously frustrated mother, and it was later
revalidated by her father and other patriarchal manifestations. It is,
however, the product of a dysfunctional family system, the larger societal
realties notwithstanding.

“VALLEY FEVER” (Viral flu-like, frequently fatal disorder)

“Persecuted urban hermit.” They have profound feelings of being under the
influence of malevolent forces and of being weak and helpless. They have a
fear of attack from others, and of taking life in fully. There is a strong
feeling of lack of support and protection.

They manifest insufficient involvement and interaction, in an “among us but

not of us” pattern. They have a lot of conflict, confusion and susceptibility
to suggestion, especially from the “world of agreement” or the group mind
or statistical “proofs.” Underneath is a buried rage and hatred for their being
so alone, alien and alienated.

It comes from a family in which they could do no right, where they were
unrecognized, and where no one supported, sustained or validated them. It
also reflects the sense of utter vulnerability, despair and nihilism that
accompany times and processes of great change.

VASECTOMY REACTION

“Mother Nature doesn’t LIKE that!” They are having intense conflicts, guilt
and/or fear over having taken away “Mommy’s toy-boy.” It arises out of a

1084
severely sexualizing and possessive maternal parenting pattern.

VEIN PROBLEMS

“Grudge-nursing.” They are unable to forgive and forget or to cleanse their

consciousness or to let go of the garbage from the past. They get caught up
in all the little things in life as “symbolic” and “representative” of how it
was and how “it always happens that way.”

They are prone to be resentment-carrying, to be injustice-nurturing, and to

live in the past. They lack understanding, and they have little flexibility of
thought. They are full of bitter grudgingness, and they are convinced that
what is given out will not be returned.

It is the result of a rigid, conservative, and unchangingly massively

dysfunctional, victimizing and mutually exploitative family who
continually complained of all the betrayals, denials and injustices they have
had to bear as a function of their own malfunctioning. (See the area(s)
affected for more information)

INFLAMMATION OF THE VEINS

“I hate my life.” They have an intense anger and frustration with their life.
They are blaming others for the limitations and lack of joy in their life that
they are undergoing at present. Their experience is that they are surrounded
by a “ship of fools,” and by irrelevant resources that simply don’t meet the
needs of the situation. It comes from having had to take over the helm of a
rudderless, highly incompetent and dysfunctional family from a very early
age.

VARICOSE VEINS (Swollen veins due to improper heart valve

functioning)

“Love is a poison apple.” They are experiencing deep emotional conflict

and tension concerning being able to love and nourish themselves, and
about letting love in. They are also feeling that they are going in the wrong
direction, and that they are not being able to be nourished by their
surrounding resources.

1085
They don’t feel that they deserve love, and in their experience, what passed
for love in their family was most untrustworthy. So they now distrust love
in all of its manifestations, and it is causing great problems for them in
dealing with life. It started in a severely exploitative and rejecting family in
which love was malevolent.

***************************************

“Leave well enough alone!” They are a situation they hate, and they are full
of seething resentment about the slow return of invested love. They are also
feeling over-worked and over-burdened.

Yet they are convinced that they dare not speak the truth about the situation,
for fear of the dire consequences. It is a discouragement and despair life
orientation generated by an exploitative, withholding and suppressive
dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Overload.” They are living a lifestyle that involves their being responsible
for more than they can handle, and they are feeling over-burdened and
burned out. They desperately want to put an end to that, and they really
want to run away from it all. They are deeply discouraged, and they are
highly negative and resistant to their situation.

They were placed in a position of heavy responsibility that was beyond

their capacities by their dependent and dysfunctional family.

“WHITE LEG” (Blanching of the leg by clots in the veins)

“Responsibility-resentment.” They have a lot of anger over having to stand

on their own two feet, and over having to stand up for themselves. They
have a strong desire to run away and escape from the responsibilities of life.

They are “pulling the world in over their head,” in an intensely change-
fighting and responsibility-deflecting manner. They are highly resistive to
the requirement to “grow up,” and they are on a “sit down strike.” The net

1086
result is that they are having difficulties in the realm of success, and they
are constantly fending off losses and failure.

This whole pattern is the result of “keep ‘em around the old homestead”
parenting in an over-indulgent, under-requiring, and growth-and change-
preventing pattern.

VENEREAL DISEASE

“Mea culpa.” They have a felt need for punishment arising out of sexual
guilt. They have the gut-level belief that genitals and sinful and dirty, due a
sexually suppressive and shame-inducing dysfunctional family, who were at
the same time “tantalizing tarantula” -- “seductive-destructive” -- “seduce--
slap” sex-ploitative.

***************************************

“Take that!” They are deeply resentful over exploitation, oppression and/or
abuse. They are now taking it out on their intimate or someone close, in a
“kick the cat” or “passing it on” reaction. They grew up in abusive, blame-
throwing, authoritarian and exploitative family. (See ACQUIRED
IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME (AIDS); GONORRHEA;
HERPES; SYPHILIS)

VERTIGO (Violent dizziness)

“New cup! New cup!” They are finding that the processes and resources
they have been relying upon for quite a while now are suddenly unavailable
and/or unworkable. They are being required to come up with new
approaches to things.

***************************************

“Flying off in all directions at once.” They are being inundated with mental
confusion and flighty, scattered thinking, due to outside pressures. They are
refusing to look at things directly and squarely in the eye. They feel
threatened by life’s demands and realities. It feels very unsafe to them, and
that it is impossible for them to have any joy in their life.

1087
Now they are faced with a high intensity and/or a high stakes decision,
commitment, undertaking or experience, and they feel overwhelmed. It is a
pattern that got started in a denial-dominated dysfunctional family in which
they were required to function in the face of chaos and refusal to deal with
reality.

VIRAL INFECTION(S)

“Resentful resignation.” They are having the experience that life is being
quite difficult, and they are feeling very little, if any positives in their life.
To them, it feels like everything is one long series of responsibilities,
traumas and drudgeries of late. It is a result of a “grimly getting through the
night” dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“Well, what do you expect?” They are bitterly of the opinion that “there is
no joy in Bloodville!” They are in effect utterly unable to experience the
beauty, good and joy of the Universe. They are quite resistive to and
resentful of the process of dealing with life. They have the feeling that they
get every disease that comes down the pike.

They are the product of a severely survivalist and self-defeating

dysfunctional family system. It had the effect of convincing them that love
and joy are a joke and that they can and should have no love for themselves,
since they are “just getting what they deserve.”

VISION PROBLEMS

“I see too much.” They have the feeling that they can’t quite handle life the
way they want to. They are feeling overwhelmed in the face of the
difficulties of life. They are seeing too much for them to handle.

So they are disrupting their vision so they don’t have to see what they’re
going through, even though they have to go through it anyway. It was an
adaptation to a significantly dysfunctional family in which it was clearly not
O.K. for them to see what was going on, going down, and coming down.

1088
RIGHT EYE VISION PROBLEMS

“Upset by what they see.” There are disturbances created by what they see
in the world around them.

LEFT EYE VISION PROBLEMS

“I don’t like what I see about me.” They are having intense conflicts
concerning what they see within themselves or concerning what is
happening to them.

ASTIGMATISM (Distorted visual perceptions)

“I trouble.” They are having difficulties with distorted perception do to a

confusion-inducing and clarity-preventing family system in childhood.
They have an abiding fear of really seeing themselves and what’s going on,
lest they set off the “dynamite shed” outcome (in which they light a match
to see where they are in this strange-smelling pitch dark room full of rough-
hewn boxes and skinny little ropes). They are manifesting self-suppression
and deep fear of seeing their real worth.

There was much abuse and many fear-inducing experiences during

childhood, and they are now trying to create a different reality, one that isn’t
the same as that playing out in front of their eyes.

RIGHT EYE ASTIGMATISM

“I don’t see it.” They have a deep fear of seeing what’s happening in the
world around them.

LEFT EYE ASTIGMATISM

“I don’t see me doing it.” There is an avoidance of perceiving who they are
out of an underlying “monster-anxiety” about themselves.

BLURRED VISION

“I don’t want to see that.” Their version of reality is not meshing with the
realities that confront them. They have a real difficulty with focusing, with

1089
being clear, and with accepting what they see. They don’t want to accept
what their eyes are telling them. They are the product of a demoralizingly
dysfunctional and denial-dominated family.

DISTORTED IMAGES IN THEIR VISION

“I trouble.” They are experiencing distorted perception do to a confusion-

inducing and clarity-preventing family system in childhood. They have an
abiding fear of really seeing themselves and what’s going on, lest they set
off the “dynamite shed” outcome (in which they light a match to see where
they are in this strange-smelling pitch dark room full of rough-hewn boxes
and skinny little ropes). They are manifesting self-suppression and deep
fear of seeing their real worth.

There was much abuse and many fear-inducing experiences during

childhood, and they are now trying to create a different reality, one that isn’t
the same as that playing out in front of their eyes.

RIGHT EYE DISTORTIONS

“I don’t dare get it.” They have a deep fear of seeing what’s happening in
the world around them.

LEFT EYE DISTORTIONS

“Monster-anxiety.” There is an avoidance of perceiving who they are out of

an underlying dread about themselves.

“DOUBLE VISION”

“I don’t understand.” They have chronic confusion and uncertainty as to

what they are seeing and what its meaning is. It is the result of receiving
many multiple messages, none of which were able to be prioritized or
confidently acted on as they were growing up.

RIGHT EYE “DOUBLE VISION”

“Say what?” They have difficulty in discerning what is going on around

them, in terms of multiple meaning potentials without a means of selection.

1090
LEFT EYE “DOUBLE VISION”

“In the dark.” They are at a loss about who they are, what they want, what
they are feeling/doing, what their impact is, and where they are going.

DULLNESS OF VISUAL ACUITY

“Dynamite shed.” They have a “Don’t see!” injunction arising from a total
dread of blowing everyone up in their severely denial-dominated and
dysfunctional family. (They are in a pitch black small space with rough-
hewn square boxes, a funny smell and skinny little ropes, and they light a
match to see what it is).

When they did the “Emperor’s new clothes” thing, the family about fell
apart, and they felt like they had destroyed the world. Or at least the threat
that this would happen was ever-present. Furthermore, what they saw was
not what they got. So they learned never to see clearly.

“FAR-SIGHTEDNESS”

“Present-avoidance.” They have a bad case of hope-addiction of the “grass

must be greener over there” and “It’s bound to be better then!” variety. They
have a real fear of the here and now realities of things and of the present.
They focus instead on the future, as they avoid the present.

They are future-fixated, and they forgo much for what they hope will be
long range gains. They are extroverted and outgoing, always looking for
something or someone better over there.

At base, it’s a self-avoidant and self-distracting activity-addict pattern of

functioning. In this, they are just passing on what they learned in their
denial-dominated dysfunctional family system.

RIGHT EYE FAR-SIGHTEDNESS

“Future-hoping.” They are looking for things to be better tomorrow in the

world around them.

LEFT EYE FAR-SIGHTEDNESS

1091
“Self-avoidance.” They have a real fear of looking at themselves and their
inner nature.

HYPERSENSITIVE VISUAL ACUITY

“Radar eyes.” They are intensely hyper-vigilant for “early warning signs”
of trouble ahead. They feel that have to continuously scope and scan the
environment for indicators and portents in order to “cover their flank,” and
to head disaster off at the pass. It is the result of a difficulty-ridden
dysfunctional family in which they were the only one to see the true nature
of what was coming as a function of their lifestyle.

NEAR-SIGHTEDNESS

“In front of their nose.” They are detail-dominated and immediacy-bound.

They can’t project themselves outward, and so they focus on what is right in
front of them. They have taken an introversive inward turn, and they are
sensuous, imaginative, highly rational, and quite introspective. They have a
fear of the future, and they don’t trust what is ahead or the process of life.
They are chronically fearful and troubled by inadequacy feelings.

There is also an abiding expectation of rejection, and they are shy and
withdrawn into their core. They feel unlovable, and so they don’t reach or
venture out, nor do they project to the future because it is so threatening.
They are past-fixated, and they fully expect things to be as they always have
been.

They were severely traumatized as a child by a dysfunctional family who

put a heavy “Don’t see!” injunction on them about the Emperor’s New
Clothes situation, where they were the only ones who could see what was
really happening.

It was made crystal clear to them that it was not acceptable. And because
they couldn’t help seeing, they concluded they are “unfit for human
consumption.” All of this ultimately culminated in their developing near-
sightedness about 6 to 18 months after the “over the top” trauma and/or
unwelcome perceptivity episode.

1092
RIGHT EYE NEAR-SIGHTEDNESS

“I don’ wanna know.” They are avoiding seeing what is going on in the
world around them.

LEFT EYE NEAR-SIGHTEDNESS

“I’m afraid to know about me.” They have a fear of seeing who they are
and what is happening with and to them.

READING PROBLEMS WITH ADVANCING AGE (Presbyopia)

“Implication-anxiety.” Because of the increasing sophistication and world-

wisdom associated with being older, the ramifications and indications of
whatever is examined in detail range far and wide, often with threatening
implications. The result is a “too much to handle” reaction.

In addition, a “mental squinting” process develops in which “I don’ wanna

know!” becomes their motto. They seek to avoid knowing too much in
detail about anything as a self-reassurance strategy.

They have a severe fear of losing control and a pronounced propensity to

avoid trauma, such as becoming aware of an ancestral history. The tendency
for this defense to show up was programmed in their denial-dominated
dysfunctional family when they were growing up.

VISUAL ANOMALIES (Flashes, sparks, floating forms, etc.)

“Return of the repressed.” They are experiencing intrusions of emotional

reactions to things they have witnessed, and which they have sought to
suppress. It comes from being immersed in a significantly dysfunctional
family, in which many unsettling events occurred, but to which they were
not to react.

VITAMIN DEFICIENCY

“Nutra-Sweet syndrome.” They are suffering from pseudo-nurturance from

their environment -- they are being given what is good for the environment
but not sustaining to them. They are experiencing exploitation drain out,

1093
which is an old, familiar story to them. They are the product of a “looking
good” but highly dysfunctional and demeaning environment.

VITILIGO (White patches on the skin, sometimes turning the whole body
white)

“Stranger in a strange land.” They are feeling completely outside of things,

like they just don’t belong anywhere. They distinctly feel not one of the
group, and that they are on the fringes of life.

It came about through the process of their being held accountable and
responsible for everything that happened in their dysfunctional family, with
the result that they ended up in the “family hoist” and the “family
scapegoat” at the same time.

That in turn led to their being apart from the family and everyone else.
Being vulnerable, involved and intimate was and is both too painful and too
destructive to them, so they have operated like a “Martian anthropologist” -
- “urban hermit” on the sidelines of society from the very beginning. (See
the affected area(s) for more information)

VOICE PROBLEMS

“Lying low.” They have a strong fear of attack for sharing and expressing
themselves. They are heavily into communication-avoidance, and they
don’t express their needs and desires. They came up in a denial-dominated
dysfunctional family in which they were never to say what they saw, felt or
knew, on the threat of annihilation and possibly of the destruction of the
whole family.

“CRACKING” VOICE

“Afraid to grow up.” They have an emotional developmental arrest at the

adolescent stage that was generated by “Don’t grow away!” parenting. It
was tantamount to killing their parents to continue their emotional
development any further. They therefore tend to be fixated on the issues of
adolescence, such as identity, intimacy, destiny questions, and authority
problems.

1094
LARYNGITIS

“Radio silence.” There is a fear of speaking up, and they are afraid to ask
for what they want because they are sure it would be withheld or used
against them. There is also a fear of expressing themselves and of not being
able to answer questions, criticisms and/or attacks. They weren’t allowed to
have wants, needs or desires, they weren’t allowed to speak up and/or have
impact, and they weren’t heard or respected as a child.

“Authority-freak.” There is a great deal of anger and resentment,

particularly towards the authorities, authority figures, and/or authority itself.
They are “so mad they can’t speak up for themselves” -- they are rageful
that they can’t be or express themselves in the world. There is a suppressed
order-giver underneath all this -- an “I know better what needs to happen
here!” feeling.

This whole experience is an old, familiar theme song for them, as it

represents what happened in their dysfunctional family, where things went
awry all the time, the “powers that be” were a “ship of fools,” and they
were not able to say anything about it.

***************************************

“Hoof in mouth.” They are experiencing shame and guilt over something
that they have already said. They are trying to stop themselves from any
further “blurt-out” episodes. They are afraid of someone hearing what they
have to say, or of what would happen if they said any more. They come
from a severely denial-dominated dysfunctional family where any form of
“cover-blowing” blew up the whole family.

VOCAL GRANULOMA; VOCAL NODULES (Contact ulcer or bumps on

the vocal cords, creating a “gravelly” voice.)

“Suppressed grief-rage.” They are avoiding coming in contact with their

underlying intense despair-grief arising from intrauterine and subsequent
maternal rejection. They feel totally alone on their own, and they have the
experience of never having been nurtured.

1095
 ***************************************

“To be seen and not heard.” They are deeply concerned that what they
might say might do to the world around them and to them. They were
subjected to much oppression concerning self-expression as a child in their
severely dysfunctional and patriarchal family.

“VOMITING”

“Revulsion-expulsion.” They are rather intensely disgusted and disturbed

by the developments in their life. They feel as though something really
unpleasant is about to happen. They have a real fear of new things, and they
are prone to violent rejection of ideas. It also reflects a feeling of being
alone on their own having to handle everything single-handed.

They have always been over-responsible, in response to being treated as if

they have to “make up for” what they are, for what they have done, and/or
for what they have wrought by their blame-throwing dysfunctional family.
(See NAUSEA; “PROJECTILE VOMITING;” “RETCHING”)

VULVA PROBLEMS

“Raped by the Universe.” She has an excessive sense of vulnerability and

violability. She feels victimized by the whole world -- as if she will be done
in by the hostile and indifferent Cosmos. She is also full of “tripod-rage”
(the irresistible urge to kick anything with three legs) and patriarchy-
paranoia. It is the result of coming up in a severely dysfunctional and
patriarchal family. (See GENITAL PROBLEMS -- FEMALE; OVARY
PROBLEMS; UTERUS PROBLEMS; VAGINAL PROBLEMS)

Section 22

1096
1097
V

561

1098
1099
V

562

563

564

565

1100
566

567

568

569

1101
WAIST PAINS

“Sexual conflicts.” They have serious issues with sexuality. They feel
“objectified” on the one hand, and “sinful” or “evil” on the other. It is the
result of being sex-ploitated and simultaneously shame-induced in a
severely dysfunctional family.

RIGHT WAIST PAINS

“Sexploitation.” They have feelings of being sexualized by the

environment.

LEFT WAIST PAINS

“Mea culpa.” They have significant sexual shame and guilt.

WARTS

“Self-revulsion.” They have a serious problem with guilt and self-disgust,

and they believe in ugliness, especially with regard to themselves. They
believe that they are effectively unlovable.

They are so self-rejecting that they are unable to experience the positive
things of the universe. They believe that they don’t deserve such things in
their life, and that “God will strike me dead!” if they do experience such
things. They were severely rejected, denigrated and blamed by their
severely dysfunctional family.

***************************************

“If it weren’t for you!” There is a marked propensity towards generalized

hatred, especially of themselves at a subconscious level. They are forever
letting out little expressions of hate, as they experience a spreading
frustration about the future. They are rather cynical and angry about
virtually everything, at the “gut level” (though not necessarily consciously).
They have a real conviction that ugliness is the way of the world.

1102
They are the product of a slyly exploitative and negative assumptive family
who systematically trained them to have a narrow-eyed and jaundiced view
of everything, but especially of themselves. (See the affected area(s) for
more information)

WATER RETENTION (See EDEMA)

WEAKNESS

“Corrective collapse.” They are feeling overwhelmed and exhausted by the

requirements of life. They deeply feel that they simply have to have a
respite and a rest in order to recuperate. It is as if it is too much for them to
handle.

Yet they can’t just walk off and leave everything -- they feel that they have
to continue carrying all their responsibilities. At the same time, they have to
have some way of alleviating the demands on them at this time.

Rest, joy, happiness and love seem beyond their capabilities to have, and
such things seem to be something they have no right to expect. So they
found that feeling weak and lacking in the strength to carry on allows them
periodic relief of responsibilities, while it simultaneously provides an
excuse to not take on some times of responsibilities. They are the co-
dependent and competence-anxious outcome of a severely exploitative
dysfunctional family.

WEEPING SKIN ERUPTIONS (Leaking lymphatic fluid)

“Seeping sorrow.” They are plagued by suppressed grief and deprivation-

depression. They received very little love and acceptance as an infant and
child.

***************************************

“Freak-out.” They are being over-run by repressed anxiety and fears

derived from a thoroughly frightening family history. (See the body area(s)
affected for more information)

1103
WEST NILE VIRUS (See NILE VIRUS)

“WHIPLASH”

“Catastrophic expectations.” They have great anxiety about what would

happen if they dealt with a big issue that is coming up for them. They are
refusing to “go with the flow,” and to “face the music,” leading to non-
relevance of functioning in the area in question. They are trying to deny
and/or control it away.

The truth is that it is an issue that must be handled at this time, as it is

effectively preventing the manifestation of their destiny -- and the Universe
is not going to allow that to continue. The issue involves early traumatic
treatment that they are loathing to confront, for fear of the consequences.

They were effectively functioning as the “family hoist” pivotal person, and
their impact was huge when they spoke up on anything. In addition, they
were subjected to severe trauma by a totally trusted significant other,
followed by the overtly or subconsciously given very clear message that
they, the perpetrator, and the whole family would be utterly annihilated if
they “blew the cover” on the situation.

“WHITEHEADS”

“Ain’t I awful?” They feel ugly and unacceptable, but they do everything
they can to hide that fact. They come from a hyper-critical and wrong-
making family that had the effect of being shame-inducing.

“WHITE LEG” (See VEIN PROBLEMS)

WHOOPING COUGH (Intense gasping coughing, with a “whooping”

sound in between coughing episodes)

“Expression-suppression.” They have intense inhibition around self-

expression, along with guilt over what they want to say. There is something
they need to speak out about, but they can’t bring themselves to do it. They
have a strong desire to bark at the world in a “See me! Listen to me, damn
it!” manner.

1104
They feel not noticed, appreciated or loved. They are abandonment-and
rejection-paranoid. However, at the same time, they are agitated, disturbed
and rejecting of ideas that scare them, or that might lead to total rejection.

It comes from a smothering, severely suppressive and intensely rejecting

family system in which the message was loud and clearly a “Don’t be you!”
injunction. They were told in no uncertain terms that they are to be seen and
not heard, and that they are in effect “the cause of World War II.”

***************************************

“Just ignore me.” They feel that they are so unimportant that they have
nothing to say, and that they have no right to expect any form of attention or
acceptance from other people. They feel that they are in effect “trivial” and
“worthless.”

In such a situation, illnesses and dramatic symptoms like the coughing and
whooping are a “sad settle-for” attention-getting mechanism acquired in a
family who would otherwise pretend they didn’t exist.

***************************************

“Run amok-anxious.” They feel that they are in effect an out-of-control

“careening cannon” that would, if they spoke up or were heard, in effect
devastate the world. They are therefore terrified of speaking out, and they
are profoundly ashamed of themselves for what they would say and do if
they could.

It reflects perfectionistic parents who induced a fear of being caught in a

mistake. The net effect here is that they become extremely cautiously
critical of themselves and all they do, in a worried, confused, mentally
conflicted and rejection-anticipating manner.

***************************************

“Self-hatred.” They are choking on life in a guilty and self-disgusted

manner. They feel that they are in effect a “piece of shit” whom everybody
should ignore anyway. They are also sure that what they would say or do

1105
would only lead to negative outcomes, they have the feeling that they are
“unfit for human consumption,” and that they are in effect the precipitator
of all the evils in the world. They are the product of a severely rejecting and
denigrating dysfunctional family.

WORKING THEMSELVES TO DEATH (Literally -- they are found dead

at their desk) [Known as KAROSHI, because it first started in Japan]

“Justifying their existence.” They had massive self-worth and self-rejection

problems. They were totally committed to the proposition that they had to
continuously seek to “prove themselves” to perfectionistic standards and
heroic accomplishment requirements. It arose from a severely demanding
and withholding parenting pattern.

“WORMS” (Parasitic)

“Going for the God Housekeeping Seal of Approval.” They are giving their
power to others, letting them take over everything in their life. It’s a pattern
that started in a “never good enough” parenting situation, in which they
frantically tried over and over to get the “God Housekeeping Seal of
Approval” -- and forever failed to do so.

The result is that they now feel that they lack the secret for success and
worth that everyone else has, and that they have to keep trying with “stand-
ins for the original cast” in re-runs of the original scenario until they “get it
right,” finally.

***************************************

“Self-distrust.” They are terrified to strike out on their own or to stand on

their own rights, ground, and two feet, for fear of the ultimate “blow-it.”
They have no trust of themselves, and they are convinced that there is an
“answer” that they don’t have and others do, so they keep on trying to find
the “key.”

In the meantime, they turn everything over to “those in the know” or to

those they think hold the “Golden Orb” of “Final Validation.” As a result,
they have to deal with constant interference and exploitation in their life. It

1106
got started in their enmeshed, possessive and competence-undermining
“keep ‘em around the old homestead” family.

***************************************

“Self-disgust.” They are full of self-rejection, along with a strong belief in

being a victim and being “unclean.” In both a reactive enslavement and a
self-fulfilling prophecy manner, they have a sense of helplessness.

They feel an utter vulnerability to the seeming attitudes of others as being

“God’s Gospel Truth,” and they then become what is said, or they elicit the
negative responses themselves. They were massively shame-induced by
their family.

***************************************

“I want it all!” They are consumed with materialistic ambitions, abundance-

seeking, and comfort concerns. Sophisticated greediness is eating away at
them. It arose from a highly self-involved family system. (See
TAPEWORM; TRICHINOSIS)

WOUND(S)

“Self-assault.” They have a pattern of being in situations that generate

severe mental anguish and sorrow. They are very angry at and guiltily
unforgiving of themselves. They feel “bad, wrong and evil,” and that they
deserve these negative experiences somehow. They are the product of a
highly accusatory, wrong-making and guilt/shame-inducing dysfunctional
family. (See the part(s) of the body affected for more information)

WRIST PROBLEMS

“Self-impeding.” They have difficulty in articulating and carrying out their

intentions, and they are concerned about their ability to move through life
with ease and skill. They are very competence-anxious and lacking in
confidence.

1107
As a result, they are quite uptight and rather ungraceful in their execution of
things. It arises from “You can do no right!” messaging from a rejecting and
demanding family.

***************************************

“Desire-deflection.” There is something that they should be doing or that

they want to be doing, but they aren’t doing it. They are holding themselves
back from final expression of what they wish to do. They feel it is somehow
“bad, wrong and evil” for them to be doing what they want.

It arises from a history of having been held accountable for all that went
wrong in their family, due to the family’s having placed them in the “family
hoist” position and expecting them to “make everything all better.”

***************************************

“Serve-aholic.” They have an inner conflict between their felt responsibility

and their need to be of service on the one hand and their need for self-
commitment and for enlightened self-interest on the other. They don’t know
how to integrate altruistic concern and selfless service with personal need-
meeting and self-advancement.

They are the product of an exploitative and yet truly needy dysfunctional
family who constantly put them in the position of having to choose between
meeting their own needs or deflecting disaster in the family.

***************************************

“Rejection-paranoia.” They are not able to carry on with a “What other

people think of me is none of my business!” attitude. Instead, they are
highly hyper-sensitive to criticism, and they crave recognition, appreciation
and response from the world around them.

This situation makes for considerable resentment, frustration and anger.

They are therefore very irritable and quite alienated towards the daily
responsibilities they perform. There is a considerable amount of
disappointment over the lack of recognition for their contribution. The net

1108
effect is that they grudgingly carry out their responsibilities in a “resentful
unsung hero(ine)” manner, and they quite fervently wish their efforts were
more appreciated.

This all arose from an exploitative and self-immersed dysfunctional family

who relied on them heavily, but with little realization or recognition of the
individual’s life necessity-supplying support.

RIGHT WRIST PROBLEMS

“How to do it right.” They have issues about how to most effectively go

about the articulation and implementation of the means of manifestation of
what needs to happen. They are competence-anxious and unsure if they
know how best to carry things off. It also has to do with their concerns
about recognition or, more accurately, about the lack thereof.

LEFT WRIST PROBLEMS

“Me or them?” They have conflicts about the integration of personal need-
meeting with their responsibilities, and also about the nature of their
personal priorities, values, needs and desires, particularly as they relate to
their public responsibilities. In addition, they are rather intensely self-
inhibiting.

CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME; “MONITOR WRIST” (Intense nerve

pain, numbing, tingling/burning hands/wrists, wrist-weakening -- due to
inflammation of the nerves in the wrist)

“Learned helplessness.” They are handicapped by a sense of felt

powerlessness in the face of the difficulties of the world. There is a lot of
anger and frustration at life’s seeming injustices, deprivations and
degradations. It is a “God is Al Capone” distrust of the Universe reaction.
They have the profound conviction that anything they want will be taken
away from them, or that it will lead to punishment/attack of some sort.

It comes from being betrayed by the family in a “love is a poison apple”

type of situation, where the original “local representatives of the Home
Office” (All that Is) played havoc with their welfare, and they could do

1109
nothing about it. They were subjected to a “look but don’t touch, much less
take or partake” formative process.

“SPRAINED” WRIST (Twisted and damaged ligament)

“Gone too far.” They are under a mental strain that can’t be tolerated any
longer. They’ve gone as far as they can with their particular mind set, and
they now have to stretch, modify or drop their mental framework to adjust
to their new realities. They developed their mind set originally in their
dysfunctional family, and it is now time to re-think their whole situation.

***************************************

“Harm-guilt.” They feel that they are handling a situation in such a way as
to cause real anguish or strain to others, or they are doing something that
they would really be better off not doing. They are in conflict about what
they are doing, and they need to come to some resolution of that.

Such conflicts hark back to their childhood, in which they frequently found
themselves engaged in activities that were to their disadvantage as their
only way of coping with their dysfunctional family.

RIGHT WRIST “SPRAIN”

“What am I doing?” They have conflicts about how they are going about
handling the world.

LEFT WRIST “SPRAIN”

“Self-questioning.” There are issues with regard to their intentions and

interventions.

WRIST BONE PROBLEMS

“Fraud feelings.” They feel that they are misrepresenting themselves, and
that they don’t have what it takes to make it in their responsibilities in life --
especially those that pertain to meeting the needs of others and of situations
and systems.

1110
They were thrust into a position of excessive responsibility when they were
a child, and they were in effect in over their head from then on, and they
had to “fake it to make it.”

RIGHT WRIST BONE PROBLEMS

“Competence-anxiety.” They have considerable self-doubt about their

ability to carry out their responsibilities.

LEFT WRIST BONE PROBLEMS

“Moral cretin.” They are worried about their felt needs and desires, and
they are quite ethically concerned about having them.

BROKEN WRIST

“Self-undermining.” They have a pattern of getting in their own way, of

self-denying, of over-giving, and of rejection expectations. They have an
underlying feeling that they really don’t deserve the good things of life.

Now they have run into a situation where this pattern has resulted in a sharp
turn for the worse in their situation. They were subjected to a great deal of
negation, denigration and rejection as a child.

BROKEN RIGHT WRIST

“Inadequacy feelings.” They feel somehow insufficient to the cause in life,

and it has come to a head.

BROKEN LEFT WRIST

“Self-distrust.” They have deep concerns about their own motivations and
manifestations, and their present situation has greatly intensified this issue.

“WRITER’S CRAMP” (Compulsive contraction of the arm muscles)

“They’ll KILL me!” They have a real fear of the consequences of putting it
out there, involving anticipation of attack, and expectation of harmful
events on the environment of the output, catastrophic predictions about

1111
what will happen within or to them, and/or a conviction that to become
successful will betray their family.

It is the result of the “dynamite shed effect” (where they find themselves in
a pitch black space with rough-hewn boxes, skinny ropes and a funny smell,
and they light a match to see where they are . . .).

They became afraid of “putting it out there” when they were a child in their
denial-dominated “keep ‘em around the old homestead” possessive family,
in which they were never to succeed their way away from home.

Section 23

1112
W

1113
570

1114
W

571

1115
572

573

574

575

576

1116
XENOPHTHALMIA (See “SOMETHING IN THEIR EYE”)

XERODERMA (See DRY SKIN)

Section 24

1117
X

1118
577

1119
X

1120
YAWNING (Frequently)

“Fall-calling.” It is a fearfulness and implication-anxiety reaction to the

experience of being asked to “do the impossible with nothing,” as they see
it, or of being asked to take a “flying leap of faith into space.”

They have a considerable amount of competence-anxiety and “fraud

feelings,” and they want to get away from the situation by “falling asleep.”
The feeling was learned in a family who depended on them extensively as a
child, in effect putting them in the “family hoist” position.

They were therefore asked to do more than they were capable of, with
everything that matters “hanging in the fire.” So they rose to the challenge
over and over as best they could, but they have always felt way, way out on
a limb.

***************************************

“Yearn-yawns.” They are having a “There must be some way out of here!”
reaction -- the strong desire for things to be very different from what they
are. They have an underlying depression which they have a way of
preserving by reflecting on how “unreal” everything is, and how it’s only
going to get worse.

It is also a boredom response (representing their desire to go to sleep),

which they get when they are confronted with irrelevant experiences on the
one hand, or with information-or implication-overload, on the other.

It is a “rebellious child” -- “authority-freak” reaction to an oppressive

patriarchal family in which one parent colluded with them and supported
them in their sense that the system sucks.

YAWS (Skin eruptions, destructive lesions of the skin and in the bones)

“Overwhelmed.” Life’s vicissitudes and difficulties have undermined the

depths of their sense of sanity and survival. They feel inferior, inadequate,

1121
and full of shame. They are having real problems with feelings of
weakness, vulnerability and worthlessness.

There is also a strong feeling of lack of support from the Universe. They
have a great deal of resentment and rage about their whole life pattern.
Underlying all of this is a pronounced tendency to resist forgiving and
forgetting the past, including past lives. They have a notable lack of peace
and harmony in their life, and they feel continuously uneasy and threatened
by the world.

This all got started when they were the “sane one” in a highly dysfunctional
family, with the result that they had to take on too much as a child. They
were in over their head then, and they now feel unable to carry on any
more.

YEAST INFECTION (In the female sexual organs)

“Me last!” They are a “serve-aholic” co-dependent who is denying of their

own needs and who is not supporting themselves. They feel that they don’t
deserve love, that they have to “earn” it, and they therefore lack self-love.

They feel that they have to “serve themselves up on a platter” to get the
“God Housekeeping Seal of Approval” that never comes. They were put on
highly conditional and demanding love by their enmeshed and possessive
but ambivalent mother.

***************************************

“Self-rejection.” They feel that there is something “bad, wrong and evil”
about them. They are therefore incapable of accepting or providing support
for themselves, and they are unable to own or manifest their personal
power. They are the product of a denigrating family who undermined their
competence and confidence.

***************************************

“Tripod-rage.” There is a considerable amount of the irresistible urge to

kick anything with three legs, and of patriarchy-paranoia, which they

1122
carefully repress and suppress. They come from a highly exploitative,
patriarchal and oppressive/suppressive family.

YEAST OVER-PRODUCTION (Leading to debilitation of the immune

system)

“Low self-commitment.” They are handicapped by an inability to release

past memories and other wastes, such as harmful habits and traits. They are
also unable to defend themselves against negative thoughts and internal and
external attacks.

They are in effect “running on empty,” and they are feeling utterly
inadequate to the cause. Their emotional body is in disrepair, and they are
having real difficulties in how well they take care of their own needs,
getting nurtured, and handling their negative feelings about themselves.
They are the product of a shame-producing dysfunctional family who
conveyed very clearly to them that they have no right to have love and joy.

YELLOW FEVER (Jaundice, fever, nausea, vomiting)

“I refuse!” They are engaged in a thorough-going rejection of their situation

and of life’s requirements. They are cynically pessimistic and nihilistic, and
there is a lack of love, compassion and tolerance on their part.

They are intensely resentful and ragingly angry at everything, and they are
violently ejecting ideas and anything new. They are condescendingly
contemptuous and distrustingly discouraged. Their experience is that
anything different would just involve more responsibilities and negativity of
outcomes. All of this derives from a highly accusatory and blame-throwing
dysfunctional and nihilistic family.

YELLOW SKIN (See JAUNDICE)

Section 25

1123
Y

1124
Y

1125
578

1126
Y

579

1127
Messages from the Body Index by Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D.

A
ABASIA

ABDOMINAL CRAMPS

ABDOMINAL PAIN

ABDOMINAL PREGNANCY

ABNORMALLY RAPID HEARTBEAT

ABORTION

ABSCESSES

ACCIDENT

ACCIDENTAL POISONING

ACHES

ACHILLES’ TENDON PROBLEMS

“ACID CONDITIONS”

ACID REFLUX

ACNE

ACQUIRED IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME

ACRONYX (See TOE NAIL PROBLEMS)

ACTION DYSTONIA (See DISRUPTION OF MOTION)

1128
ADDICTIONS

ADDISON’S DISEASE

ADENOID PROBLEMS

ADHESIVE CAPSULITIS

ADRENAL DEPLETION

ADRENAL PROBLEMS

“AGENT ORANGE” POISONING

ADRENO-LEUKO DYSTROPHY (See A.L.D.)

AEROPHAGY (See “GULPING AIR”)

AGING PROBLEMS

AGRANULOCYTOSIS

AGUE

AIR SICKNESS

ALCOHOLISM

A.L.D.

ALGESIA (See HYPERSENSITIVITY TO PAIN)

ALLERGIC SHOCK

ALLERGIES

ALOPECIA (See LOSS OF BODY AND HEAD HAIR)

ALTITUDE SICKNESS

1129
ALVEOLI PROBLEMS

ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE

AMBLYOPIA

AMEBIASIS

AMENORRHEA (See LACK OF MENSTRUATION)

AMNESIA; AMNESIC SYNDROME

AMYOTROPIC LATERAL SCLEROSIS (See “LOU GHERIG’S

DISEASE”)

AMYGOALA PROBLEMS (See BRAIN PROBLEMS)

ANALGESIA (See LACK OF THE SENSE OF PAIN)

ANAL PROBLEMS

ANAPHRODISIA (See LACK OF SEXUAL DESIRE)

ANAPHYLACTIC ALLERGIC SHOCK (See ALLERGIC SHOCK)

ANDROGEN PROBLEMS

ANEMIA

ANESTHETIC EJACULATION

ANEURYSM

ANGINA PECTORIS

ANKLE PROBLEMS

ANKYLOSING SPONDYLITIS (See SPINE PROBLEMS)

ANORECTAL BLEEDING (See ANAL PROBLEMS)

1130
ANOREXIA

ANOXIA (See OXYGEN DEPRIVATION, USUALLY DURING BIRTH)

ANTHRAX

APHASIA

APNEA

APOPLEXY (See “STROKE”)

APPENDICITIS

APPENDECTOMY

APPETITE, EXCESSIVE

APPETITE, LOSS OF

ARM PROBLEMS

ARMPIT PROBLEMS

ARRHYTHMIA

ARTERIOSCLEROSIS

ARTERIOSCLEROTIC DEMENTIA

ARTERY PROBLEMS

ARTHRALGIA (See PAIN IN THE JOINTS)

ARTHRITIC FINGERS (See FINGER PROBLEMS)

ARTHRITIC HANDS (See HAND PROBLEMS)

ARTHRITIS

1131
ARTICULATION PROBLEMS

ASBESTOS POISONING

ASPHYXIATING ATTACKS

ASSAULT VICTIM

ASTHMA

ASTIGMATISM (See VISION PROBLEMS)

ASYNERGY (See “AWKWARDNESS”)

ATACTILIA (See LOSS OF THE SENSE OF TOUCH)

ATAXIA (See LOSS OF COORDINATION)

ATHETOSIS

ATHLETE’S FOOT

ATHROMBIA (See INABILITY TO FORM BLOOD CLOTS)

AUTO-IMMUNE DISORDER

AUTO-IMMUNE HYPOGLYCEMIA

AUTO-INTOXICATION (See SELF-POISONING)

AVIAN FLU (“BIRD FLU”)

AVITAMINOSIS (See VITAMIN DEFICIENCY)

“AWKWARDNESS”

AXILLA PROBLEMS (See ARMPIT PROBLEMS)

1132
BACKACHE

BACK HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

BACK PROBLEMS

BAD BREATH

BAD TASTE IN THE MOUTH

BALANCE PROBLEMS

“BARBER’S ITCH”

BED-WETTING; “PEEING IN THEIR PANTS”

BEE STINGS

BELCHING; BURPING

BELL’S PALSY

“BELLY BUTTON” PROBLEMS

BELLY PROBLEMS

“BENDS”

BERYLLIUM POISONING

BILE IN THE BLOOD

BIRD FLU (See AVIAN FLU)

BITES – ANIMAL

BITES – HUMAN

BITES – INSECT

1133
BITES – SNAKE

BITES – SPIDER

“BLACK EYE”

BLACKHEADS

BLACKING OUT

BLADDER PROBLEMS

BLANCHING

BLAND TASTE PREFERENCES

BLEEDING

BLEEDING GUMS (See GUM PROBLEMS)

BLINDNESS

BLINKING RAPIDLY

BLISTERS

“BLOATED” (Abdominal Distention)

“BLOATED” (Body-wide Water Retention)

“BLOOD BLISTER”

BLOOD CLOTS

BLOOD POISONING

BLOOD PRESSURE – HIGH

BLOOD PRESSURE – LOW

1134
BLOOD PROBLEMS

“BLOODSHOT EYES” (See EYE PROBLEMS)

BLURRED VISION

BODY ODOR (“B.O.”)

BOILS

BONE PROBLEMS

BONES, BROKEN

BONES, DISLOCATED

BOTULISM

BOWEL MOVEMENT QUALITIES

“BRAIN FOG”

BRAIN PROBLEMS

BRAIN TUMOR

BREAKING WATER

BREAST PROBLEMS

BREAST CYSTS

BREAST DISCHARGE

BREAST INFLAMMATION

BREAST SORENESS

BREAST TUMOR

1135
BREATHING PROBLEMS; MOUTH BREATHING

BREECH PRESENTATION

“BRITTLE BONES” SYNDROME

BROKEN BLOOD VESSELS

“BROKEN HEART SYNDROME”

BRONCHIAL OBLITERATIVE OBSTRUCTIVE PNEUMONIA

BRONCHIAL PROBLEMS; BRONCHIAL SPASMS

BRUISES

BUBONIC PLAGUE

BULIMIA

BUNIONS (See FOOT PROBLEMS)

BURNS

BURSITIS

BUTTOCKS PROBLEMS

BUTTOCK FOLD PROBLEMS

BY-PASS OPERATION

C
CAISSON DISEASE (See “BENDS”)

CALCIFICATION

CALF PROBLEMS

1136
CALLOUSES

CANCER

CANDIDA

CANKER SORES

CAPILLARY PROBLEMS

CARBUNCLE

CARDIAC ARREST

CARDIO-VASCULAR PROBLEMS

CARPAL-TUNNEL SYNDROME

CAR SICKNESS

CATALEPSY

CATARACTS

CATARRH OF THE EAR

CAVITIES

CELIAC DISEASE

CELLULITE

CELLULITIS

CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“CEREBRAL ALLERGY”

CEREBRAL PALSY

1137
CEREBRO-VASCULAR ACCIDENT [“C.V.A.”] (See “STROKE”)

CERVIX PROBLEMS

CAESAREAN SECTION BIRTH

CESSATION OF OVULATION

CHAFING

CHAGAS’ DISEASE

CHAMEROID

“CHAPPED LIPS”

CHARLES BONNET SYNDROME (C.B.S.)

“CHARLIE HORSE” [Sudden or prolonged muscle cramp in the leg] (See

CRAMPS -- MUSCLE)

CHEEK PROBLEMS

CHEEKBONE PROBLEMS

CHEMICAL POISONING

CHEMOTHERAPY REACTION

CHEST COLD

CHEST PROBLEMS

“CHICKEN POX”

“CHILBLAINS”

CHILDBIRTH COMPLICATIONS

CHILDBIRTH DAMAGE TO THE MOTHER

1138
CHILDHOOD DISEASES

“CHILLS”

CHIN PROBLEMS

CHLOASMA

CHOKING

CHOLERA

CHOLESTEROL PROBLEMS

CHOREA

CHRONIC DISEASE

CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME; CHRONIC FATIGUE IMMUNE

DYSFUNCTION SYNDROME

CHRONIC OBSTRUCTIVE PULMONARY DISEASE (C.O.P.D.)

CHRONIC REVERSED POLARITY

CIRCULATION PROBLEMS

“CLEARING THEIR THROAT”

CLENCHED FISTS, CHRONIC

CLITORIS PROBLEMS

“CLUSTER HEADACHES”

COLD EXTREMITIES, CHRONIC

COLD EXTREMITIES, TEMPORARY

COLD-HATING (ALLERGIC TO COLD)

1139
COLD-LOVING

COLDNESS

COLDNESS HEADACHE

COLDS; “COMMON COLD”

“COLD SORES”

“COLD SWEATS”

COLIC

COLITIS (See COLON PROBLEMS)

COLLAPSED LUNG

COLLAR BONE PROBLEMS

COLON PROBLEMS

COMA

CONCUSSION

CONDYLOMATA

CONGESTION

CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE

CONGESTIVE PNEUMONIA

CONSTIPATION, CHRONIC

CONSTIPATION, TEMPORARY

CONSTRICTIONS

1140
CONTACT DERMATITIS

CONTINUOUS ERECTION

CONVERSION DISORDER

CONVULSIONS (See SEIZURES)

COORDINATION PROBLEMS

CORNEA PROBLEMS

CORNS

CORONARY THROMBOSIS

CORTISOL PROBLEMS

COSTALGIA (See PAIN IN THE RIBS)

COUGH

COUGH – PERSISTENT

COUVADE

COXSACKIE VIRUS

“CRABS”

“CRAMPS” MUSCLE

“CRAMPS” UTERINE

CRANIAL PRESSURE

CREUTZFELDT-JAKOB DISEASE

CROHN’S DISEASE (See LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS)

1141
“CROUP”

“CROWN AREA” PROBLEMS

CRYING -- EXCESSIVE OR CHRONIC

CUMULATIVE TRAUMA DISORDER

CUSHING’S DISEASE (See ADRENAL DEPLETION)

CUTICLE PROBLEMS

CUTS

CYSTIC FIBROSIS

CYSTS

D
DANDRUFF

DEAFNESS

DEATH “BLUNT FORCE”

DEATH IN CHILDBIRTH

“DEEP VEIN THROMBOSIS” DVT (See “TRAVELER’S

THROMBOSIS”)

DEGENERATION OF THE SPINAL CORD AND MUSCLES;

DEGENERATIVE DISORDERS

DEGENERATIVE JOINT DISORDER (DJD)

DEHYDRATION

1142
DELIRIUM

DELIRIUM TREMENS

DEMENTIA

DEMENTIA DUE TO H.I.V. VIRUS

DENGUE

DERMATITIS

DETACHED RETINA

DEVIATED SEPTUM

DHEA PROBLEMS

DIABETES – TYPE I

DIABETES - TYPE II

“DIAPER RASH”

DIAPHRAGM PROBLEMS

DIARRHEA

DIFFICULTY SWALLOWING

DIFFICULTY WITH BREAST FEEDING

DIGESTIVE ENZYME PROBLEMS

DIGESTIVE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

DIPHTHERIA

DISCHARGE FROM THE NOSE (FOUL-SMELLING)

1143
DISCOLORATION OF THE SKIN

DISC PROBLEMS

DISSEMINATED SCLEROSIS

DISRUPTION OF MOTION

DIVERTICULITIS (See LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS)

“DIZZINESS”

“DOWN THE WRONG TUBE”

“DOWNWIND SYNDROME” (See RADIATION SICKNESS)

DROOLING

“DROP-FOOT”

“DROPSY”

DROWNING

“DRY HEAVES”

DRY MOUTH (Lack of saliva)

DRY MOUTH (Where the tongue sticks to the roof and it feels sticky)

DRY SKIN

“D.T.s” (See DELIRIUM TREMENS)

DUODENUM PROBLEMS

DYSANTINONIA (See UNCONTROLLABLE RESPONSES FROM THE

CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM)

DYSENTERY -- AMOEBIC (Severe diarrhea caused by amoeba)

1144
DYSENTERY -- BACILLARY (Severe diarrhea caused by bacteria)

DYSKINESIA (Uncoordinated involuntary movements)

DYSLEXIA (Inability to read -- inability to perceive written material

correctly)

DYSTONIA

EARLY MENOPAUSE

EARACHE

EAR DRAINAGE

EAR INFECTION

EAR PROBLEMS

EARLOBE PROBLEMS

EATING DISORDERS

“E-BALL VAPOR” POISONING

ECLAMPSIA (Internal poisoning and possibly convulsions late in

pregnancy)

E. COLI

ECTOPIC PREGNANCY (Outside the uterus)

ECZEMA (Itchy rashes on skin)

EDEMA (Body-wide water retention)

1145
ELBOW PROBLEMS

ELECTRIC SHOCK

ELEPHANTIASIS (Severe swelling of extremities and genitals, with skin-

thickening)

ELIMINATION PROBLEMS

EMBOLISM (Floating blood clot in their circulation system)

EMPHYSEMA (Degeneration of the lungs)

ENCEPHALITIS (Inflammation of the brain)

ENDOCRINE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

ENDOMETRIOSIS; ENDOMETRITIS (Inflammation of the womb lining)

ENERGY DEPLETION

ENTERITIS (Inflammation of the intestinal tract)

ENVIRONMENTAL ALLERGY (Allergic to just about everything)

EPILEPSY

EPSTEIN-BARR VIRUS (Continuous exhaustion)

ESOPHAGUS PROBLEMS

ESTROGEN PROBLEMS (Female hormone, particularly in regard to the

sexual system)

EUSTACHIAN TUBE PROBLEMS

EXCESSIVE LACTATION (Too much milk production)

EXCESSIVE SALIVATION

1146
EXCESS SPINAL FLUID

EXCESS MUCOUS

EXHAUSTION

“EXPLOSION” (Literally their head or their whole body “exploding” --

blowing apart)

EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA

EYE PROBLEMS

EYEBROW PROBLEMS

EYELASH PROBLEMS

EYELID PROBLEMS

F
FACE PROBLEMS

FACE NERVE PAIN, SEVERE

FACIAL “TIC” (Involuntary movements of the facial muscles)

“FAILURE TO THRIVE” (Wasting away in infancy)

“FAINTING SPELLS;” FAINTING

FALLOPIAN TUBE PREGNANCY

FALLOPIAN TUBE PROBLEMS (Particularly blocking)

FALLS

“FALSE PREGNANCY”

1147
“FARTING”

FATIGUE

FATTY TUMORS (Fatty deposits and growths)

“FEEBLENESS”

“FEMALE PROBLEMS”

FEMALE SEXUAL AROUSAL DISORDER

FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME

FEVER

“FEVER BLISTERS”

FIBRILLATION (Abnormally rapid heartbeat)

FIBROCITIS (See MUSCLE PROBLEMS)

FIBROIDS (Benign tumors and cysts in the

womb)

FIBROMYALGIA

FIBROUS GROWTHS

“FIFTH SYNDROME” VIRUS (Dry red rashes-highly contagious)

FINGER PROBLEMS

FINGER INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

FINGER NAIL PROBLEMS

FISTULA (Hole from surface to an inner organ)

1148
“FLESH-EATING VIRUS;” “FLESH-EATING BACTERIA”

“FLICKER-FREAKOUTS”

“FLOATERS” (Free-falling dark bits in the ocular fluid)

FLU; INFLUENZA (Virus infection)

FLUCTUATING ILLNESS (It comes and it goes)

FOOD POISONING

FOOT PROBLEMS

FOREHEAD PROBLEMS

FRACTURED SKULL

FREEZING TO DEATH

FREQUENT ILLNESSES

FREQUENT URINATION

FRIGIDITY

“FROG IN THE THROAT” (Mucous in the larynx) [Frequently]

FRONT HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“FROST BITE” (Damage to extremities caused by freezing)

“FROZEN SHOULDERS”

FUNGUS

G
GALL BLADDER PROBLEMS

1149
GANGLION (See HAND PROBLEMS)

GANGRENE

“GAS;” “GAS PAINS”

GASTRIC BY-PASS (Stapling off part of the stomach to lower food intake)

GENITAL PROBLEMS, FEMALE

GENITAL PROBLEMS, MALE

GENITAL “WARTS”

G.E.R.D. (Gastro-Esophageal Reflex Disease [Heartburn]

GERMAN MEASLES

GIARDIA (Toxic parasite that induces nausea, vomiting and diarrhea)

GIARDIA LAMBIA

GINGIVITIS (See GUM PROBLEMS)

“GLANDERS” (Swollen mucous membranes in nostrils and jaw-it comes

from horses.)

GLANDULAR PROBLEMS

GLAUCOMA (Fluid pressure increase and the resulting hardening of the

eyeball)

GLOBUS HYSTERICUS (See “LUMP IN THE THROAT”)

GLUTEN SENSITIVITY

“GOITER” (Enlarged thyroid gland)

GONORRHEA

1150
“GOOSE BUMPS”

GOUT

GRANULOCYTOPENIA (Reduced defensive white blood cells)

GRAVE’S DISEASE (Hyper-thyroidism)

GROIN PROBLEMS

GROWTHS (Tumors)

“GULF WAR SYNDROME”

“GULPING AIR”

GUM PROBLEMS

GUNSHOT WOUND

H
HAIR-LOSS

HAIR-PULLING; PULLING HAIR OUT

HAIR TANGLES; HAIR-SNARLING (Frequently or chronically)

HAND PROBLEMS

“HANGOVER”

“HANTA-VIRUS”

HARDENING OF THE ARTERIES

HAY FEVER

HEADACHES

1151
HEADACHES -- MIGRAINE (See MIGRAINE HEADACHE)

“HEAD COLD”

HEAD LICE

HEAD PROBLEMS

HEAD TRAUMA

HEARING PROBLEMS; “HARDNESS OF HEARING”

HEART AREA PROBLEMS

HEART ATTACK

HEARTBEAT SLOWED

“HEARTBURN”

HEART BY-PASS OPERATION

“HEART FAILURE”

“HEART MURMUR”

HEART PROBLEMS

HEART-STOPPAGE – SUDDEN

HEART VALVE PROBLEMS

HEAT-HATING

HEAT-LOVING

“HEAT PROSTRATION”

HEAT RASH

1152
“HEAT-STROKE”

HEEL SPUR

HEMOPHILIA

HEMORRHAGING

HEMORRHOIDS

HEPATITIS

HERNIA

HERNIATED DISC

HERPES; HERPES GENITALIS

HERPES SIMPLEX; HERPES LABIALIS

HIATAL HERNIA

“HICCABURP”

HICCOUGHS; HICCUPS

HIP PROBLEMS

H.I.V. POSITIVE

“HIVES”

HODGKIN’S DISEASE

HOMICIDE VICTIM

“HOOF AND MOUTH” DISEASE

“HOOK WORM”

1153
HORMONAL PROBLEMS

HOT EXTREMITIES, CHRONIC

HOT EXTREMITIES, TEMPORARY

“HOT FLASHES”

HOTNESS; FEELING HOT; HAVING HOT SKIN

“HPV” (Human Papilloma Virus)

HUNTINGTON’S CHOREA

HYPER-ACTIVITY; HYPER-REACTIVITY

HYPER-GLYCEMIA

HYPER-PARATHYROIDISM

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO LIGHT AND PERCEPTIONS

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO PAIN

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF SENSE OF SMELL

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO SOUND AND NOISE

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF TASTE

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO TEMPERATURE – COLD

HYPERSENSITIVITY TO TEMPERATURE – HOT

HYPERSENSITIVITY OF TOUCH

HYPER-SOMNIA

HYPER-TENSION

1154
HYPER-THYROIDISM

HYPER-VENTILATION

HYPOGLYCEMIA

HYPO-SENSITIVITY TO PAIN

HYPO-TENSION

HYPO-THALAMUS PROBLEMS

HYPO-THYMUS PROBLEMS

HYPO-THYROIDISM

HYSTERECTOMY

IATROGENIC ILLNESS

I.L.C. [Idiopathic Lympho-Cytopenia -- an AIDS-like pattern without

H.I.V.] (See ACQUIRED IMMUNO-DEFICIENCY SYNDROME)

ILEITIS

ILEOCECAL VALVE PROBLEMS

IMMUNE SYSTEM PROBLEMS

IMPETIGO

IMPOTENCE

INABILITY TO ABSORB NUTRIENTS

INABILITY TO COMMUNICATE MEANING

1155
INABILITY TO COMPREHEND SPEECH

INABILITY TO CRY (Emotional)

INABILITY TO CRY (Genetic)

INABILITY TO DISCERN EMOTIONS

INABILITY TO FORM BLOOD CLOTS

INABILITY TO FORM WORDS

INABILITY TO PERCEIVE THINGS

INABILITY TO PHONETICALLY SOUND OUT WORDS

INABILITY TO PRODUCE MILK (Nursing)

INABILITY TO RECOGNIZE FACES

INABILITY TO SLEEP

INABILITY TO SMELL

INABILITY TO SNEEZE

INABILITY TO SPEAK; INABILITY TO TALK

INABILITY TO SWALLOW

INABILITY TO TASTE

INABILITY TO URINATE

INABILITY TO WALK

INCONTINENCE (See “DIARRHEA;” “SPASTIC COLON;” “The

TROTS”) INCURABLE DISEASES

INDIGESTION

1156
INDUCED LABOR

INFANTILE PARALYSIS (See POLIO)

INFECTION

INFERTILITY

INFLAMMATION

INFLAMMATION OF THE ABDOMINAL CAVITY LINING

INFLAMMATION OF THE BONES

INFLAMMATION OF THE BRAIN

INFLAMMATION OF THE CHEEK(S)

INFLAMMATION OF THE HAIR ROOTS

INFLAMMATION OF THE JOINTS

INFLAMMATION OF THE MAMMARY GLAND(S)

INFLAMMATION OF THE MASTOIDS

INFLAMMATION OF THE PALATE

INFLAMMATION OF THE RETINA

INFLAMMATION OF THE STOMACH LINING

INFLAMMATION OF THE TONSILS

INHALING SOMETHING FROM THE ATMOSPHERE AROUND

THEM

INHALING SOMETHING DOWN THE WRONG TUBE

INHIBITED ORGASM – FEMALE

1157
INHIBITED ORGASM – MALE

INJURIES

INNER EAR PROBLEMS

INSANITY

INSOMNIA

INTERMITTENT BLEEDING

INTERSEX

INTESTINAL CRAMPS

INTESTINAL FLU

“INTUITION HEADACHES”

INVOLUNTARY TREMOR

“IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME” (See “SPASTIC COLON”)

“IRRITABLE STOMACH SYNDROME”

ITCHING

-ITIS (See INFLAMMATION)

I.T.P.

J
JAUNDICE

JAW PROBLEMS

1158
JEJUNITIS (Inflammation of the small intestine) [See SMALL
INTESTINE PROBLEMS]

“JERKING” MOVEMENTS OF THE EYES (Nystagmus)

JOINT PROBLEMS

“JUNGLE ROT” (Severe fungus infection)

K
KAPOSY’S SARCOMA

KIDNEY PROBLEMS

KLEBSIELLA

KLINEFELTER SYNDROME

KNEE PROBLEMS

KNIFE WOUND

KNOCKED OUT; “K.O.’d”

KNUCKLE PROBLEMS

L
LABORED BREATHING

LACK OF COORDINATION (See “AWKWARDNESS”)

LACK OF MENSTRUATION

LACK OF SEXUAL DESIRE

LACK OF THE SENSE OF PAIN

1159
LACTIC ACIDOSIS

LACTOSE INTOLERANCE

LADA (Latent Autoimmune Diabetes in Adults)

“LAMENESS”

LARGE INTESTINE PROBLEMS

LARYNGITIS

LARYNX PROBLEMS

“LAZY EYE(S)”

LEAD POISONING

LEFT-HANDEDNESS

LEFT SIDE OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

LEG PROBLEMS

LEGIONNAIRES DISEASE

LOWER HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

“LOW MILK SYNDROME”

LOW PLATELETS

LOW SPERM COUNT

LOW WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT

“LUMBAGO”

“LUMP IN THE THROAT” (Chronic)

1160
LUNG PROBLEMS

LUPUS

LYME DISEASE

LYMPHOMA

LYMPH SYSTEM PROBLEMS

M
MALARIA

MALE ERECTILE DISORDER

“MALE MENOPAUSE” (Post-retirement depression)

“MALE PROBLEMS”

MALNUTRITION

“MARASMUS”

MASTADENITIS; MASTITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE

MAMMARY GLAND(S))

MASTOIDITIS

MEASLES

MELANOMA

MEMORY PROBLEMS

MENIERE’S DISEASE

MENINGITIS

1161
MENOPAUSE PROBLEMS

MENSTRUAL PROBLEMS

MERCURY POISONING

“METH MOUTH”

MICRO-PLASM

MIGRAINE HEADACHE

“MISCARRIAGE” (Spontaneous abortion)

MISSING PULSE; NO PULSE DETECTABLE (AT TIMES)

MITOCHONDRIAL MYOPATHY

MITTLESCHMERTZ (Literally: “middle pain” -- pain at ovulation)

MONILIASIS

“MONITOR FATIGUE” (Computer screen viewing disorder)

MONKEY POX

MONONUCLEOSIS; MONO (Glandular fever)

“MORNING SICKNESS”

MOTION SICKNESS

MOUNTAIN SICKNESS (Due to low air pressure)

MOUTH PROBLEMS

MRSA (Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus – a severe viral

infection)

MULTIPLE CHEMICAL SENSITIVITY

1162
MULTIPLE MYELOMA

MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS

MUMPS (Inflammation of the large salivary glands)

MUSCLE CRAMPS

MUSCLE PROBLEMS

MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY

MUSHROOM POISONING

MYALGIC ENCEPHALOMYELITIS; “M.E.”

MYASTHENIA GRAVIS

MYOMA

N
NARCOLEPSY

NAUSEA

NAVEL PROBLEMS

“NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE” (“N.D.E.”)

NECK PROBLEMS

NECROSIS

NECROTIZING FASCIITIS (See “FLESH-EATING VIRUS”)

NEMATODES

NERVE PROBLEMS

1163
“NERVOUS BREAKDOWN”;“NERVOUS PROSTRATION”

“NERVOUSNESS”

NEUROPATHY

“NIGHT BLINDNESS;” “NIGHT MYOPIA”

NIGHTMARES; NIGHT TERRORS

NILE VIRUS; WEST NILE VIRUS

“NODULES”

NON-GROWTH OF HAIR

NON-TICKLISHNESS

NOSEBLEEDS

NOSE PROBLEMS

NUMBNESS

NUMB FEET

O
OILY SKIN

“--OSIS”

OSTEOMALACIA

OSTEO-MYELITIS

OSTEOPOROSIS

OVARY PROBLEMS

1164
“OVER-ACTIVE” ADRENALS

“OVERDOSE”

“OVERDUE”

“OVER-SEXED”

OVERWEIGHT; OBESITY

OXYGEN DEPRIVATION -- USUALLY DURING BIRTH

OZENA (See DISCHARGE FROM THE NOSE, FOUL-SMELLING)

P
“PACE-MAKER”

PAGET’S DISEASE

PAIN

PAIN AT OVULATION

PAIN BETWEEN THE SHOULDER BLADES

PAINFUL BOWEL MOVEMENTS

PAINFUL INTERCOURSE

PAINFUL MENSTRUATION

PAINFUL URINATION

PAIN IN THE ABDOMEN

PAIN IN THE JOINTS

PAIN IN THE MUSCLES

1165
PAIN IN THE RIBS

PAIN ON MOVEMENT

PAIN TOLERANCE – HIGH

PAIN TOLERANCE – LOW

PALLEGRA

PALATITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE PALATE)

PALSY

PANCREAS PROBLEMS

PANIC ATTACKS; PANIC DISORDER

PARALYSIS

PARALYSIS OF THE DIAPHRAGM

PARASITES; PARASITIC WORMS

PARASYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM PROBLEMS

PARATHYROID PROBLEMS

PARESIS

PARKINSON’S DISEASE

PAROXYSMAL AURICULAR TACHYCARDIA (See “STABBING

HEART PAINS”)

“PARROT FEVER”

PELVIS PROBLEMS

PENIS PROBLEMS

1166
PEPTIC ULCER

PERICARDIUM PROBLEMS

PERINEUM PROBLEMS

PERIPHERAL NERVE FUNCTIONING IMPAIRMENT

PERITONEUM PROBLEMS

PERNICIOUS ANEMIA

“PETITE MAL”

PFEIFFER’S DISEASE (See MONONUCLEOSIS)

“PHANTOM LIMB”

PHILTRUM PROBLEMS

PHLEBITIS

PICK’S DISEASE

PIMPLES

“PINCHED NERVE”

PINEAL GLAND PROBLEMS

“PINK EYE” (See EYE PROBLEMS)

“PIN WORMS”

PITUITARY GLAND PROBLEMS

PLACENTA PROBLEMS

PLANTAR WARTS

1167
PLATELETS, LOW

PLEURISY

“P.M.S.” (Pre-Menstrual Syndrome); “P.M.T.” (Pre-Menstrual Tension)

PNEUMOCOCCUS

PNEUMONIA

POISONING

POISON OAK; POISON IVY

POLIO; POLIOMYELITIS

POLYCYSTIC OVARIAN SYNDROME (PCOS)

POLYPS

POST-CHILDBIRTH COMPLICATIONS

“POST-NASAL DRIP”

POST-PARTUM DEPRESSION

PREGNANCY COMPLICATIONS

PREMATURE BIRTH

PREMATURE DEVELOPMENT

PREMATURE EJACULATION PATTERN

PREMATURE MENOPAUSE

“PRICKLY HEAT”

PROGERIA

1168
PROGESTERONE PROBLEMS

“PROJECTILE VOMITING”

PROLAPSE

PROLAPSED HEART VALVE

PROSTATE PROBLEMS

PROSTRATION

PRURITIS (See ITCHING)

PSORIASIS

PSYCHOMOTOR EPISODES

PTOMAINE POISONING

PUBIC BONE PROBLEMS

“PUFFINESS”

Q
QUADRIPLEGIC [Paralyzed in four limbs] (See PARALYSIS)

“QUINCY”

R
“RABBIT FEVER”

“RABIES”

RADIATION SICKNESS

1169
RAPE

RASHES

“RAT BITE FEVER”

RAYNAUD’S DISEASE

RECTAL PROBLEMS

RECTOCELE

RECURRING ILLNESS (See FLUCTUATING ILLNESS)

REFERRED PAIN

REFLEX SYMPATHETIC DYSTROPHY

REFLUX

REGURGITATION (See VOMITING)

RELAPSING FEVER

REPETITION OF BEHAVIORS; COMPULSIVE REDUNDANCY

REPETITIVE INVOLUNTARY MOVEMENTS

REPETITIVE MOTION DISORDER

REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN PROBLEMS

RESPIRATORY ILLNESS

RESPIRATORY PROBLEMS

RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME 1

RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME 2

1170
RETCHING

RETINA PROBLEMS (See EYE PROBLEMS)

RETINITIS (See INFLAMMATION OF THE RETINA)

RETROGRADE AMNESIA

“RETRO-VIRUS”

REYE’S SYNDROME

RHEUMATIC FEVER

RHEUMATIC HEART

RHEUMATISM

RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS

RIB PROBLEMS; RIB CAGE PROBLEMS

RICKETS

RIGHT/LEFT SPLIT IN THEIR BODY

RIGHT SIDE OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

RINGING IN THE EARS (Mild)

“RINGWORM”

RITTER’S DISEASE

ROCKY MOUNTAIN SPOTTED FEVER

ROSACEA

ROTATOR CUFF TENDONITIS

1171
RUBELLA

RUMINATION DISORDER OF INFANCY

“RUNNY NOSE”

RUPTURE

RUPTURED DISC

S
SACROILIAC PROBLEMS

SALIVARY GLAND PROBLEMS

SALMONELLA

SARCOIDOSIS (See IMMUNE SYSTEM PROBLEMS)

S.A.R.S

SCABIES (See SKIN MITES in SKIN PROBLEMS)

SCABS

SCALP PROBLEMS

SCARLET FEVER

SCIATICA

SCLEROSIS

SCOLIOSIS

SCRATCHES

SCRATCHING

1172
SCROTUM PROBLEMS

SCURVY

“SEA-SICKNESS”

SEBACEOUS CYST

SEBORRHEIC KERATOSIS

SEIZURES

SELF-INDUCED ILLNESSES

SELF-POISONING

“SEMI-SNORTING”

SENILITY

SENSORY-MOTOR INTEGRATION SYNDROME

SEPSIS

SEPTIC SHOCK

SEPTICEMIA (See BLOOD POISONING)

“SHAKES”

SHALLOW BREATHING

SHIGELLOSIS

“SHINGLES”

SHIN PROBLEMS

“SHIVERING”

1173
“SHOCK REACTION”

SHORTNESS OF BREATH

SHOULDER BLADE PROBLEMS

SHOULDER JOINT PROBLEMS

SHOULDER PROBLEMS

SICKLE CELL ANEMIA

“SIDE ACHE”

“S.I.D.S.”

SIGHING

SILICON POISONING

SINUS PROBLEMS

SKELETON PROBLEMS

SKIN PROBLEMS

SKIN TABS

SLEEP APNEA

SLEEP-DEPRIVATION SYNDROME

“SLEEPING SICKNESS”

SLEEP-WAKE SCHEDULE DISORDER

SLEEP-WALKING

SLOWED HEART RATE

1174
SMALL INTESTINE PROBLEMS

SMALL POX

SMOKE-INHALATION

“SNARLS” IN THE HAIR; HAIR TANGLES

SNEEZING

“SNIFFLING”

SNORING

“SNORTING”

SOFTENING OF THE BONES

“SOLAR FEVER”

SOLAR PLEXUS PROBLEMS

“SOMETHING IN THEIR EYE”

SORES

SORE THROAT

“SPASTIC COLON”

“SPASTIC” DUODENUM

SPHINCTER PROBLEMS

SPINAL CORD PROBLEMS

SPINAL DISC PROBLEMS

SPINAL FLUID PROBLEMS

1175
SPINAL INJURY (See SPINAL CORD PROBLEMS)

SPINAL MENINGITIS (Inflammation of the brain and/or spinal cord

lining) [See MENINGITIS]

SPINE PROBLEMS

SPLEEN PROBLEMS

“SPLINTERS”

SPLIT HAIR ENDS

SPRAINS

SPRUE

“SQUINTING”

“STABBING HEART PAINS”

STAB WOUND

STAPH INFECTION; STAPHYLOCOCCUS

STARVATION

STATIC ELECTRICITY SHOCKS

“STEALTH VIRUS”

STENOSIS (See SPINE PROBLEMS)

STERILITY

STERNUM PROBLEMS

“STIFFNESS”

STIGMATA

1176
STIGMATOSIS (See ULCERATED SPOTS ON THE SKIN)

“STING-ITCHES” [Sudden and extremely compelling] (See ITCHING)

STOMACH ACHE

STOMACH FLU

STOMACH PROBLEMS

STREP THROAT

“STRESS EFFECTS”

“STROKE”

“STUBBED TOE”

“STUFFY NOSE”

“STUPOR”

“STUTTERING”

“ST. VITUS’ DANCE”

“STY” (Inflammation of the eyelid) (See EYELID PROBLEMS)

“SUDDEN DEATH DIET” SYNDROME

SUDDEN INFANT DEATH SYNDROME (See “S.I.D.S.”)

SUFFOCATION

SUICIDE

SUNBURN

“SUNSTROKE” (See “HEAT PROSTRATION”)

1177
SUN SENSITIVITY

SWALLOWING DIFFICULTY

SWEATING EXCESSIVELY

“SWEATLESS”

SWELLING

SYMPATHETIC NERVOUS SYSTEM PROBLEMS

“SYNDROME X”

SYPHILIS

SYSTEMIC INFECTION

T
TAPEWORM

TARDIC DYSKINESIA

TEAR DUCT PROBLEMS

“TEETH-CHATTERING”

“TEETH-GRINDING”

TEETH PROBLEMS

TEMPLE PROBLEMS

TEMPORO-MANDIBULAR JOINT (“TMJ”) PROBLEMS

TENDON PROBLEMS

TENSION HEADACHES

1178
TESTICLE PROBLEMS

TESTOSTERONE PROBLEMS

TETANUS; TETANY

The “TROTS;” The “RUNS”

THICKENED BONES

THIGH PROBLEMS

“THIRD EYE” AREA PROBLEMS

THIRSTINESS; DRYNESS OF THE MOUTH AND THROAT

THREAD WORM (See TAPE WORM)

THROAT CLEARING (See CLEARING THEIR THROAT)

THROAT PROBLEMS

THRUSH

THYMUS GLAND PROBLEMS

THYROID PROBLEMS

“TICS”

TICKS

“TINGLING” SENSATIONS

TINNITUS

TOE PROBLEMS

TOE INTERSPACE PROBLEMS

1179
TOE NAIL PROBLEMS

TONGUE PROBLEMS

TONSILLITIS

TORPOROUSNESS

TORSO PROBLEMS

TORTICOLLIS (See NECK PROBLEMS)

TOURETTE SYNDROME

TOXOPLASMOSIS

TRACHEA PROBLEMS

TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY (TBI)

“TRAVELER’S THROMBOSIS;” “ECONOMY CLASS SYNDROME,”

“DEEP VEIN THROMBOSIS” OR DVT

TREMBLING

TREMOR

“TRENCH MOUTH”

TRICHINOSIS

TRIGEMINAL NEURALGIA (See FACE NERVE PAINS, SEVERE)

TRIGLYCERIDES, HIGH

“TRIPLE WARMER” PROBLEMS

TUBAL PREGNANCY

TUBERCULOSIS

1180
TUBEROUS SCLEROSIS

TUMOR(S)

“TWITCHING”

TYPHOID FEVER

TYPHUS FEVER

U
ULCERATED LARYNX

ULCERATED SPOTS ON THE SKIN

ULCERATIVE COLITIS

ULCERS

UMBILICAL HERNIA

UNCONTROLLABLE RESPONSES FROM THE CENTRAL NERVOUS

SYSTEM

UNCOORDINATED INVOLUNTARY MOVEMENTS

UNDER-ACTIVE ADRENALS

UNDERWEIGHT IN INFANCY

UNDETECTABLE PULSE (See MISSING PULSE)

“UNDULANT FEVER”

UPPER HALF OF THE BODY PROBLEMS

UPSET STOMACH

1181
UREMIA

URETHRA PROBLEMS; URINARY TRACT PROBLEMS URGE

URINARY INCONTINENCE; URINATING TOO FREQUENTLY

UTERUS PROBLEMS

V
VACCINATION REACTION

VAGINAL PROBLEMS

VAGINAL WHITE DISCHARGE

“VALLEY FEVER”

VASECTOMY REACTION

VEIN PROBLEMS

VENEREAL DISEASE

VERTIGO

VIRAL INFECTION(S)

VISION PROBLEMS

VITAMIN DEFICIENCY

VITILIGO

VOICE PROBLEMS

“VOMITING”

VULVA PROBLEMS

1182
W
WAIST PAINS

WARTS

WATER RETENTION (See EDEMA)

WEAKNESS

WEEPING SKIN ERUPTIONS

WEST NILE VIRIS (See NILE VIRIS)

“WHIPLASH”

WHITE LEG (See VEIN PROBLEMS)

“WHITEHEADS”

WHOOPING COUGH

WORKING THEMSELVES TO DEATH

“WORMS”

WOUND(S)

WRIST PROBLEMS

“WRITER’S CRAMP”

X
XENOPHTHALMIA (See “SOMETHING IN THEIR EYE”)

XERODERMA (See DRY SKIN)

1183
Y
YAWNING

YAWS

YEAST INFECTION

YEAST OVER-PRODUCTION

YELLOW FEVER

1184
1185
Index

1186
1187
Index

dlxxxi

dlxxxii

dlxxxiii

dlxxxiv

dlxxxv

1188
dlxxxvi

dlxxxvii

dlxxxviii

dlxxxix

dxc

dxci

dxcii

dxciii

dxciv

dxcv

1189
dxcvi

dxcvii

dxcviii

dxcix

dc

dci

dcii

dciii

dciv

dcv

1190
dcvi

dcvii

1191
Arehart-Treichel, J. BIOTYPES. Time Books, New York, 1980.

Blackwell, J. and Blackwell, G. BODY MAGIC. Devon Press, Devon,

Alberta, CANADA, 1985.

Booth, R. “The Relationship Between Archetypal Medicine and Past Life

Therapy: Interdisciplinary Alternatives to Reductionistic Practice.” The
International Journal of Transpersonal Studies, 17, l, 1998, 7-16.

Buess, L. M. SYNERGY SESSION. DeVorss & Co., Marina Del Rey, CA,
1980.

Carlson, S. “Body Analysis.” Seminar, Portland, OR, 1982.

Clark, M. C. “Spiritual Causes of Physical Pain, Part I.” The Michael

Connection, Orinda, CA, Fall, 1989.

Clark, M. C. “Spiritual Causes of Physical Pain, Part II.” The Michael

Connection, Orinda, CA, Winter, 1990.

Cooke, M. B. SYMBOLS. Marcus Books, Agincourt, Ontario, CANADA,

1980.

Cooke, M. B. BODY SIGNS. Marcus Books, Queensville, Ontario,

CANADA, 1982.

Dennison, P. and Hargrove, G. “Integrated Movements for Meridian

Over/Under Dependency.” Unpublished manuscript, San Anselmo, CA,
1984.

Dethlefsen, T. and Dahke, R. THE HEALING POWER OF ILLNESS: The

Meaning of Symptoms and How to Interpret Them. Element Press,
Rockport, MA, 1991.

Dychtwald, K. BODY/MIND. Jove Publications, New York, 1978.

Ekman, P. TELLING LIES: Clues to Deceit in the Marketplace, Politics and

Marriage. Norton, New York, 1985.

1192
Friedman, H. S. (Ed.) PERSONALITY AND DISEASE. Wiley, New York,
1990.

Friedman, H. S. THE SELF-HEALING PERSONALITY: Why Some

People Achieve Health and Other Succumb to Illness. Henry Holt, New
York, 1991.

Friedman, H. S. (Ed.) HOSTILITY, COPING AND HEALTH. American

Psychological Association Press, Washington, D.C., 1992.

Friedman, H. S., Tucker, J. S., Schwartz, J. E., Tomlison-Keasey, C.,

Martin, L. R., Wingard, D. L. & Criqui, M. H. “Psychosocial and
Behavioral Predictors of Longevity: The Aging and Death of the Termites.”
American Psychologist, 50, 2, 1995, 69-78.

Gach, M. R. and Marco, C. ACU-YOGA. Japan Publications, Tokyo, 1981.

Gibson, W. and Gibson, L. COMPLETE ILLUSTRATED BOOK OF THE

PSYCHIC SCIENCES. Doubleday, New York, 1966.

Graham, D. T. “Verbal Attitudes Associated with Physical Disorders.”

Paper presented at the meetings of the American Psychosomatic Society,
Rochester, N.Y., 1962.

Hay, L. HEAL YOUR BODY: METAPHYSICAL CAUSATIONS FOR

PHYSICAL ILLNESS. Self-published, Santa Monica, CA, 1984.

Hay, L. HEAL YOUR BODY: THE MENTAL CAUSES FOR PHYSICAL

ILLNESSES AND THE METAPHYSICAL WAY TO OVERCOME
THEM. Hay House, Santa Monica, CA., 1988.

Hay, L. HEAL YOUR BODY: A TO Z. THE MENTAL CAUSES FOR

PHYSICAL ILLNESSES AND THE WAY TO OVERCOME THEM. Hay
House, Carlsbad, CA, 1998.

Janov, A. THE ANATOMY OF MENTAL ILLNESS. Berkeley Publishing

Corp, New York, 1971.

1193
Kellerman, S. SOMATIC REALITY: Bodily Experience and Emotional
Truth. Center Press, Berkeley, CA, 1979.

Kellerman, S. EMOTIONAL ANATOMY. Center Press, Berkeley, CA,

1985.

Kellerman, S. EMBODYING EXPERIENCE: Forming a Personal Life.

Center Press, Berkeley, CA, 1987.

Kellerman, S. PATTERNS OF DISTRESS: Emotional Insults and Human

Form. Center Press, Berkeley, CA, 1989.

Khalsa, G.S.S. CHUA KA’: Zones of Karma. Unpublished manuscript, Los

Angeles, CA, 1981.

Kurtz, R. THE BODY REVEALS. Harper & Row, New York, 1976.

Kurtz, R. HAKOMI THERAPY. Hakomi Institute, Boulder, CO, 1988.

Kurtz, R. BODY-CENTERED PSYCHOTHERAPY: The Hakomi Method.

Life-Rhythm, Mendicino, CA, 1990.

Kushi, M. ORIENTAL DIAGNOSIS. Sunwheel Publications, London,

1978.

Lewis, H. R. and Lewis, M. E. PSYCHOSOMATICS: How Your Emotions

Can Damage Your Health. Viking Press, New York, 1972.

Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan Khalsa-Singh) “Illnesses and

Ailments.” Unpublished manuscript, San Francisco, 1985.

Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan Khalsa-Singh) “Physical

Feelings.” Unpublished manuscript, San Francisco, 1985.

Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan Khalsa-Singh) “The Body

Speaks.” Unpublished manuscript, San Francisco, 1985.

Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan Khalsa-Singh) WHAT’S IN A

FACE? Talkinghearts 1995; Rev. 2007.

1194
Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan Khalsa-Singh) ADDICTIONS
AND CRAVINGS: Their Psychological Meaning. Boulder, CO, 1996;
Revised 2006 Talkinghearts Lincoln, Ph.D. Michael J. (FKA Narayan
Khalsa-Singh) ALLERGIES AND AVERSIONS. Boulder, CO, 1996;
Revised 2006 Talkinghearts Lowen, A. THE BETRAYAL OF THE BODY.
MacMillon Co, New York, 1967.

Lowen, A. THE LANGUAGE OF THE BODY. Collier Books, New York,

1971.

Luscher, M. THE FOUR-COLOR PERSON. Simon & Schuster, New York,

1977.

Luscher, M. PERSONALITY SIGNS. Warner Books, New York, 1981.

Lynn, H. DISEASE, THE CAUSE AND CURE. Coleman Graphics, Long

Island, N.Y., 1982.

Morris, D. MANWATCHING. Abrams Press, New York, 1977.

Morris, D. BODY WATCHING. Crown, New York, 1985.

Moyer, B. HEALING AND THE MIND. Doubleday, New York, 1994.

Murray, L. S., Proud, P.M. and Tripp, J. M. TURNING AROUND: A

Healing Workshop. Powerline Press, San Jose, CA, 1981.

Ogden, P. “Dimensions of Character.” (In) Kurtz, R. HAKOMI THERAPY.

Hakomi Institute, Boulder, CO, 1988.

Ornstein, R. and Sobel, D. “The Healing Brain.” Psychology Today, New

York, 1987.

Pelton, R. W. THE COMPLETE BOOK OF DREAM INTERPRETATION.

Arco Press, New York, 1983.

Pennebaker, J. W. OPENING UP: The Healing Power of Confiding in

Others. Morrow, New York, 1990.

1195
Reich, W. THE FUNCTION OF THE ORGASM. Orgone Institute Press,
New York, 1942.

Reich, W. CHARACTER ANALYSIS. Orgone Institute Press, New York,

1949.

Rolf, I. P. STRUCTURAL INTEGRATION. Guide for Structural

Integration, Boulder, CO, 1962.

Rush, M. DECODING THE SECRET LANGUAGE OF THE BODY: The

Many Ways Our Bodies Send Us Messages. Simon & Schuster, New York,
1994.

Saltrus, C. and Maisel, E. BODY SCOPES: The Revealing Link Between

Body and Personality. Bantam Books, New York, 1986.

Serinus, J. “Permission to Heal.” (In) Lee, P., Smith, I. and Adair, M. (Eds.)
PSYCHO-IMMUNITY AND THE HEALING PROCESS: Focus on
Immune Dysfunction and A.I.D.S. Celestial Arts, San Francisco, 1986.

Shapiro, D. THE BODYMIND WORKBOOK. Element Books, Longmead,

Shaftesbury, Dorset, ENGLAND, 1990.

Schenck, Ruthanna HEAL THYSELF: A TEXTBOOK OF DIVINE

HEALING. Unity School of Christianity, Kansas City, MO, 1928.

Siegel, B. LOVE, MEDICINE AND MIRACLES. Harper and Row, New

York, 1988.

Siegel, D. J. THE DEVELOPING MIND: How Relationships and the Brain

Interact to Shape Who We Are. Guilford Press, New York, 1999

Steadman, A. WHO’S THE MATTER WITH ME? ESP Press, Inc.,

Washington, D.C., 1973.

St. John, G. and Shapiro, D. THE METAPHORIC TECHNIQUE. Element

Books, Longmead, Shaftesbury, Dorset, ENGLAND, 1983.

1196
Truman, K. K. FEELINGS BURIED ALIVE NEVER DIE . . . Olympus
Distributing, Las Vegas, Nevada, 1996.

Vaughn, B. L. BODY TALK. Argus Publications, Allen, TX, 1982.

Whitmont, E. C. THE ALCHEMY OF HEALING: Psyche and Soma.

North Atlantic Books, Berkeley, CA, 1994.

1197
1198
1199
References

1200
1201
1202
1203
References

1204
dcix

1205
dcx

1206
dcxi

1207
dcxii

1208
dcxiii

1209
1210
Addiction and Cravings: Their Psychological Meaning (1991, Rev. 2006)

This book is an outstanding overview on the nature of Addictions and

Cravings. In addition, a "Dictionary" of the Psychological (and occasionally
the sacred) meanings of various addictions and cravings ranging from
"Crack" to Mozart. Spiral binding, 400 pages

1211
Allergies and Aversions: Their Psychological Meaning (1991, Rev. 2006)

1212
Allergies and Aversions A dictionary of the psychological dynamics and
learning history underlying 300 of the most common allergies is presented
for the purposes of understanding the meaning of having an intolerance
response to these substances. Spiral binding, 134 pages

1213
What’s in a Face? (1990, Rev. 2007) The “Dictionary” for Heart Centered
Face Reading

An exhaustive dictionary of the psychological (and occasionally the sacred)

meanings of facial structure, including head characteristics and hair
qualities. It coalesces the ancient Chinese system for doing this is called
“Siang Mien” (pronounced SEE-ahng MEE-un), which means
“investigating spirit.” The contents of this dictionary include the utilizable
contents of Siang Mien, plus the best of the West and the author’s own
experiences over the last 40 years of study of this subject. Spiral binding,
273 pages

1214
1215
Problematic Patterns: Behavioral, Psychological and Psychiatric Their
Emotional Meanings (1991, Rev. 2007)

A brief discussion of the nature of Problematic Patterns of personal and

behavioral functioning, followed by a "dictionary" of a considerable
number of patterns, including the psychiatric diagnostic system, Michael J.
Lincoln's diagnostic system, the enneagram point problems, the deadly sins,
numerous traits and many, many more patterns. Using the DSM’s as a
benchmark you will find items like Drama Triangle-Addict, Compulsive
Disorders, Perfectionism and Stress-Seeking Patterns to name a few. Comb
binding, 778 pages

1216
Parent Their Soul (1992, Rev. 2007)

1217
Comprehensive approach to Parenting

An in-depth exploration of the issues, parameters, and experiences of

parenting. Also provided is a comprehensive approach to parenting based
on realistic, vital awareness and values also explore the dictionary on
problematic parenting patterns. Learn how to parent the soul, deal with an
old soul child, Indigo/Crystal children as well. Spiral binding, 149 pages

1218
WHAT’S HAPPENING TO ME!!?? (1981, Rev. 2007)

A Road Map to the Journey of Change and the Healing Process

This book is about what happens when you reach a place where it is
necessary to reconstruct yourself. The idea is to get an overview of what the
various events in this process mean. It has the effect of clarifying this
process so that it’s not so confusing, demoralizing, enraging, and alarming.
It also has the effect of accelerating the healing process when you have
some sort of understanding of What’s Happening to you. Spiral binding,
135 pages

1219
Animals Their Psycho-Symbolic Meaning (1991, Rev. 2007)

1220
A discussion of the nature of animals as symbols in our society and how to
interpret them. The ways in which they appear in our lives, the sources of
their significance, and the types of indications involved. This leads into a
dictionary of the archetypic symbolic and psychological meanings of over
500 animals. Also discussed are the varieties of symbolic meaning in the
literature, along with the nature of the purposes of the animal’s entering
your life at this time. Spiral binding, 491 pages

1221
My Car, Myself (1991, Rev. 2008)

1222
A dictionary of the psychological meanings of having your car break down
with regard to what the breakdowns indicate about what is happening for
you at the time, as a kind of early warning system. It covers most of the
major components of the car, ranging from the fuel pump to the floor mats.
It also interprets other aspects of your relationship with your car, such as
driving habits, traffic tickets, disruptive behaviors and car attitudes It
actually works! Spiral binding, 317 pages

In 2006 Dr. Lincoln decided to revise and expand all of his works. We are
pleased to present you his latest revised work. See our website
www.talkinghearts.net for the latest information on releases.

1223
1224
Books Now Available by Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D.

In 2006 Dr. Lincoln decided to revise and expand all of his works. We are
pleased to present you his latest revised work. See our website
www.talkinghearts.net for the latest information on releases.

1225
1226
1227
Books Now Available by Michael J. Lincoln, Ph.D.

In 2006 Dr. Lincoln decided to revise and expand all of his works. We are
pleased to present you his latest revised work. See our website
www.talkinghearts.net for the latest information on releases.

1228
dcxv

1229
dcxvi

1230
dcxvii

1231
1232