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Eight Things Emotionally Intelligent People Don’t Do. Do You?

Positive Psychology Coaching (Ian Tuhovsky) <[email protected]> Mon, 10 Apr at 11:01
Reply to: <[email protected]>
To: Vikram <[email protected]>

Eight Things Emotionally Intelligent People Don’t

Do. Do You?

Hello Vikram, how are you doing today?

If you want to achieve anything at all, you need to control how to become
master of your own emotions first.

Emotional Intelligence is one of the most important factors you need to master. Yes,
it’s a skill and it can be trained like any other skill…it’s also a specific attitude towards
life, yourself and other people.

Today, let me tell you about things emotionally intelligent people never do:

1. They don’t compare themselves to other people. You will always be able to
find someone who does better on a certain area of their lives, so it’s a sure
way to bring yourself down. Of course, you should take example of successful
people and use it as your inspiration, but if you’re punishing yourself just
because you haven’t yet achieved what they’ve achieved, it’s a sure way to
fail. Everyone starts from a different level, with a different set of skills,
experiences, beliefs and resources, so you simply can’t look at what other
people do and let it bring you down. If you want to be truly successful, instead
of comparing yourself to others, you need to compare yourself to your past
self. Give yourself 1-month, 2-month, 6-months, etc. goals, and regularly look
back to see how much you have changed.
2. They don’t hang around negative and toxic people. How often do you hang
around people who constantly try to bring you down, just because you are
already used to it and ‘that’s just how you roll’? How often do you let your
‘friends’ make you feel bad? As the popular (and 100% true) saying goes, you
are the average of the 5 persons you are around the most. That’s one of the
biggest secrets: if you want to become kick-ass in something, hang around
people who already rock in this area. Do you want to increase your income?
Hang around people who earn much more than you do. Do you want to
 become more healthy and in shape? Make your friends at the gym or a
meetup.com/Facebook aerobics group. It’s the fastest way to skyrocket your
self-development in a certain area. We are social beings. Moreover, it will
simply make you happier, motivated and much more fulfilled.
3. They don’t hold grudges and learn how to truly forgive instead. You need
to realize that if you hold grudges, the only one person who gets really hurt is
you. You don’t have to and shouldn’t forget (to avoid getting hurt again,
especially if it was something really serious for you), but you need to forgive
and let go, for your own good.
4. They know emotions are inherently interconnected with our bodies, so
they exercise regularly and eat a healthy diet.
5. They don’t let the fear of failure stop them. Someone asked me, “When
did you discover what you wanted to do with your life? How did you
know that?” The answer is: I didn’t. I had no idea. I had to take risk and I was
scared. No one promised me I will succeed. I had LOTS of doubts. But I
ignored them and took action, instead of wasting my time focusing on what
could possibly go wrong. If you focus on what can go wrong, you will always
find it. That’s what separates wise and effective people from the rest. They are
not supermen; of course they are afraid, but they don’t let the monster from
under the bed scare them and hold them back from real action.
6. They take responsibility for their emotional states. That’s the only way to
really change your emotions. Even if it’s not your fault that you are feeling one
way or another, it’s still your responsibility. You are the only one to change the
way you feel, the way you think, the way you believe. No one can do it for you!
You need to avoid the victim mentality and start taking responsibility for your
life. That’s the only smart way out of bad situations in life.
7. They don’t seek acceptance and approval from others. They look for
acceptance from themselves. They follow their own set of values and their
code of conduct. They do only what they truly believe in, without letting society
tell them what to do, or trying to live up to other peoples’ standards.
8. They pay attention to what they are feeling (+when and why they are
feeling it), and learn about tools allowing them to regulate their emotions.
You need to be in charge of your emotions, not the other way around. If you
want to control your emotions, you need to become aware of them. That’s the
first step, before you will be able to learn how to deal with your emotions so
they are serving you, not distracting you and holding you back.

There are many ways to do it.

You can use techniques from my book I sent you for free in the first welcome e-mail,
you can use meditation or learn more about this fascinating topic from my book,
Emotional Intelligence Training where I tell you exactly how to deal with your
emotions and give you the most useful tools to do it effectively. Here's is the
link to Amazon Kindle:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00TXFCDCQ/
 
That’s it for today,
I hope I’ve been able to inspire you!

Have any questions or doubts? Let me know! I'm happy to receive e-mails
from my readers!

Have a great day!

Your friend,
Ian
 
 
 

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