Psychology​ ​101

Psychology​ ​of​ ​KDrama

CHINITO​ ​ANG​ ​PIPILIIN​ ​KO:​ ​PSYCHOLOGY​ ​OF​ ​KOREAN​ ​DRAMAS

What​ ​is​ ​the​ ​KDrama​ ​model​ ​of​ ​romantic​ ​love?​ ​Is​ ​it​ ​applicable​ ​to​ ​the​ ​Philippine​ ​context?

Outline
- Definition​ ​of​ ​love
- Psych​ ​definition​ ​of​ ​love
- Letter
- Maslow​ ​(Describe​ ​all​ ​levels​ ​but​ ​focus​ ​on​ ​love)
- Love​ ​and​ ​Liking​ ​(p.483)
- Components​ ​of​ ​love​ ​(definition​ ​then​ ​cognitive​ ​then​ ​bio)
- Rules​ ​of​ ​attraction​ ​(definition​ ​then​ ​cognitive​ ​then​ ​bio)
- Filipino​ ​context​ ​of​ ​love
- Sikolohiyang​ ​Pilipino
- Refer​ ​to​ ​love​ ​letter​ ​again
- Transition​ ​to​ ​KDrama
- KDrama​ ​plot​ ​lines​ ​and​ ​archetypes
- Venn​ ​diagram​ ​of​ ​Filipino​ ​teleseryes​ ​and​ ​KDrama
- Gender​ ​roles
- Tips​ ​to​ ​fulfill​ ​your​ ​need​ ​of​ ​love
- Conclusion:​ ​Is​ ​it​ ​applicable?

Target​ ​audience
- Girls​ ​who​ ​are​ ​recently​ ​heartbroken​ ​because​ ​of​ ​a​ ​failed​ ​relationship
- Girls​ ​who​ ​want​ ​to​ ​improve​ ​their​ ​love​ ​life

Teaser​ ​script​ ​(20-30​ ​secs)

Lagi​ ​na​ ​lang​ ​po​ ​ako​ ​nasasaktan.​ ​All​ ​my​ ​past​ ​relationships​ ​end​ ​up​ ​in​ ​the​ ​drain.​ ​Hindi​ ​ko​ ​na​ ​po​ ​alam​ ​kung
saan​ ​ako​ ​nagkakamali.​ ​Pause​ ​Gusto​ ​ko​ ​lang​ ​po​ ​ng​ ​relasyong​ ​magtatagal,​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​forever.​ ​I​ ​want​ ​to​ ​be
as​ ​happy​ ​as​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​babae​ ​sa​ ​KDrama​ ​(℅​ ​Rena)​ ​while​ ​overlapping​ ​definitions​ ​of​ ​love​ ​from​ ​Filipinos
and​ ​Koreans​ ​(℅​ ​Pat)
Short​ ​silence,​ ​Fade​ ​in​ ​SFX1
SFX1:​ ​Goblin​ ​tunnel​ ​song​ ​(℅​ ​Pat)
Q:​ ​If​ ​you​ ​were​ ​given​ ​the​ ​chance​ ​to​ ​experience​ ​love​ ​again,​ ​are​ ​you​ ​willing​ ​to​ ​try​ ​a​ ​different​ ​form​ ​of​ ​love?
(℅​ ​Ja​ ​or​ ​voice​ ​actress)
Fade​ ​in​ ​SFX2
SFX2:​ ​Chinito​ ​ang​ ​pipiliin​ ​ko~
Cut​ ​SFX2
Do​ ​you​ ​like​ ​Messi?​ ​(℅​ ​Rena;​ ​Pabebe)
Podcast​ ​Script​ ​(20​ ​-​ ​30​ ​mins)
SFX:​ ​Famous​ ​KDrama​ ​kilig​ ​lines

Narrator:​ ​What​ ​is​ ​love?

SFX:​ ​Goblin​ ​tunnel​ ​song

Interviewees:​ ​Definitions​ ​of​ ​love​ ​(Filipinos​ ​and​ ​Koreans)​ ​*min​ ​of​ ​4​ ​definitions,​ ​maximum​ ​of​ ​8

P:​ ​Hi​ ​guys!​ ​Today​ ​we’re​ ​going​ ​to​ ​discuss​ ​a​ ​very​ ​controversial​ ​topic​ ​yet​ ​a​ ​classic.​ ​As​ ​the​ ​intro​ ​mentioned,
we’re​ ​going​ ​to​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​looove~

R:​ ​Wow,​ ​as​ ​a​ ​hopeless​ ​romantic,​ ​I​ ​love​ ​discourse​ ​about​ ​this.

P:​ ​Yes​ ​but​ ​mind​ ​you​ ​guys,​ ​everything​ ​we​ ​are​ ​about​ ​to​ ​discuss​ ​today​ ​is​ ​all​ ​academic.

R:​ ​The​ ​best​ ​part​ ​of​ ​this​ ​podcast​ ​is​ ​since​ ​it​ ​is​ ​a​ ​Wednesday,​ ​all​ ​speakers​ ​today,​ ​which​ ​is​ ​you​ ​and​ ​me,​ ​are
beautiful​ ​and​ ​intellectual​ ​women​ ​from​ ​diverse​ ​parts​ ​of​ ​the​ ​University​ ​of​ ​the​ ​Philippines​ ​Diliman.

P:​ ​The​ ​chosen​ ​topic​ ​for​ ​today​ ​is​ ​inspired​ ​by​ ​this​ ​Facebook​ ​video.​ ​Let’s​ ​watch​ ​this.​ ​Well​ ​in​ ​the​ ​case​ ​of​ ​the
people​ ​listening,​ ​let’s​ ​listen.

Video:​ ​Ayaw​ ​ko​ ​na.​ ​Ang​ ​sakit,​ ​sakit​ ​na.​ ​Lagi​ ​na​ ​lang!​ ​Lagi​ ​na​ ​lang​ ​ako​ ​nasasaktan.​ ​Lahat​ ​na​ ​lang​ ​nang
minahal​ ​ko​ ​iniiwan​ ​ako.​ ​Hindi​ ​ko​ ​na​ ​po​ ​alam​ ​kung​ ​saan​ ​ako​ ​nagkakamali.​ ​Binibigay​ ​ko​ ​naman​ ​po​ ​sa
kanila​ ​ang​ ​lahat.​ ​Eh​ ​ganun​ ​ako​ ​magmahal​ ​eh.​ ​Hindi​ ​ko​ ​na​ ​maisip​ ​kung​ ​saan​ ​ako​ ​nagkamali.​ ​Hindi
naman​ ​ako​ ​panget​ ​.​ ​Di​ ​rin​ ​naman​ ​ako​ ​tanga.​ ​Pakiramdam​ ​ko​ ​ako​ ​na​ ​yung​ ​may​ ​mali​ ​eh.​ ​Ako​ ​ba,​ ​Ate
Charot?​ ​I​ ​am​ ​a​ ​good​ ​lover!​ ​Napakasakit​ ​lang​ ​na​ ​pinagmumukha​ ​akong​ ​tanga​ ​ng​ ​mga​ ​lalaki.​ ​(Iyak)​ ​Gusto
ko​ ​lang​ ​po​ ​ng​ ​relasyong​ ​magtatagal,​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​forever.​ ​Yung​ ​totoong​ ​forever!​ ​Sa​ ​totoo​ ​lang,​ ​I​ ​just​ ​want
to​ ​be​ ​as​ ​happy​ ​like,​ ​like​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​babae​ ​sa​ ​KDrama.​ ​Oo,​ ​parang​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​babae​ ​sa​ ​KDrama.​ ​Yung​ ​may
mga​ ​oppa​ ​oppa​ ​(Iyak)

P:​ ​Wow.​ ​I​ ​remember​ ​my​ ​first​ ​heartbreak​ ​which​ ​I​ ​do​ ​not​ ​wish​ ​to​ ​dwell​ ​on​ ​but​ ​-

R:​ ​This​ ​episode​ ​is​ ​going​ ​to​ ​scratch​ ​on​ ​old​ ​wounds,​ ​my​ ​friend.

P:​ ​Unfortunately,​ ​so.​ ​Ladies,​ ​gentlemen,​ ​and​ ​everyone​ ​between​ ​and​ ​beyond,​ ​I’m​ ​Pat

R:​ ​And​ ​I’m​ ​Rena.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​Chinito​ ​and​ ​pipiliin​ ​mo~

P:​ ​What​ ​is​ ​a​ ​Chinito​ ​in​ ​the​ ​first​ ​place?

R:​ ​Biologically​ ​and​ ​physically​ ​speaking,​ ​on​ ​average,it’s​ ​a​ ​singkit​ ​guy,​ ​more​ ​or​ ​less​ ​Asian.​ ​For​ ​the​ ​sake​ ​of
this​ ​discussion,​ ​we​ ​will​ ​refer​ ​to​ ​them​ ​as​ ​Koreans
P:​ ​That​ ​witty​ ​title​ ​pretty​ ​much​ ​sums​ ​up​ ​our​ ​discussion​ ​today​ ​which​ ​is​ ​about​ ​Love​ ​and​ ​Koreans,​ ​well
KDramas​ ​to​ ​be​ ​exact.​ ​Now,​ ​did​ ​you​ ​ever​ ​mind​ ​why​ ​love​ ​exists?​ ​Why​ ​is​ ​there​ ​a​ ​need​ ​for​ ​love?​ ​Why​ ​do
some​ ​people​ ​still​ ​choose​ ​to​ ​love​ ​again​ ​despite​ ​all​ ​the​ ​heartbreaks,​ ​risk​ ​and​ ​uncertainties?

R:​ ​People​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​feel​ ​or​ ​fall​ ​in​ ​love​ ​because​ ​it​ ​is​ ​in​ ​our​ ​very​ ​nature​ ​to​ ​seek​ ​for​ ​it.​ ​According​ ​to​ ​Maslow’s
Hierarchy​ ​of​ ​Needs,​ ​part​ ​of​ ​the​ ​needs​ ​of​ ​human​ ​beings​ ​are​ ​love​ ​needs,​ ​which​ ​is​ ​the​ ​feeling​ ​to​ ​be​ ​with
others,​ ​to​ ​be​ ​accepted​ ​and​ ​to​ ​belong.​ ​Maslow's​ ​hierarchy​ ​of​ ​needs​ ​is​ ​a​ ​motivational​ ​theory​ ​in​ ​psychology
comprising​ ​a​ ​five​ ​tier​ ​model​ ​of​ ​human​ ​needs,​ ​often​ ​depicted​ ​as​ ​hierarchical​ ​levels​ ​within​ ​a​ ​pyramid.​ ​Love
needs​ ​is​ ​somewhere​ ​in​ ​between​ ​after​ ​fulfilling​ ​the​ ​safety​ ​needs​ ​and​ ​before​ ​the​ ​esteem​ ​needs.​ ​After
securing​ ​the​ ​basic​ ​needs​ ​such​ ​as​ ​food​ ​and​ ​water​ ​and​ ​one’s​ ​safety,​ ​one​ ​usually​ ​secures​ ​all​ ​these​ ​things
further​ ​through​ ​attaining​ ​a​ ​higher​ ​level​ ​of​ ​need​ ​by​ ​being​ ​connected​ ​to​ ​others.

R:​ ​You’re​ ​right.​ ​This​ ​five-stage​ ​model​ ​can​ ​be​ ​divided​ ​into​ ​deficiency​ ​needs​ ​and​ ​growth​ ​needs.
Specifically,​ ​the​ ​first​ ​four​ ​levels​ ​are​ ​often​ ​referred​ ​to​ ​as​ ​deficiency​ ​needs​ ​(D-needs).​ ​These​ ​are​ ​Biological
and​ ​physiological​ ​needs​ ​such​ ​as​ ​air,​ ​food,​ ​drink,​ ​shelter,​ ​warmth,​ ​sex,​ ​sleep;​ ​Safety​ ​needs​ ​such​ ​as​ ​security,
order,​ ​law,​ ​stability;​ ​Today’s​ ​highlight,​ ​Love​ ​and​ ​belongingness​ ​needs​ ​such​ ​as​ ​friendship,​ ​intimacy,​ ​trust
and​ ​acceptance,​ ​receiving​ ​and​ ​giving​ ​affection​ ​and​ ​love;​ ​and​ ​Esteem​ ​needs​ ​which​ ​Maslow​ ​classified​ ​into
two​ ​categories:​ ​(i)​ ​esteem​ ​for​ ​oneself​ ​(dignity,​ ​achievement,​ ​mastery,​ ​independence)​ ​and​ ​(ii)​ ​the​ ​desire​ ​for
reputation​ ​or​ ​respect​ ​from​ ​others​ ​(e.g.,​ ​status,​ ​prestige).​ ​Maslow​ ​indicated​ ​that​ ​the​ ​need​ ​for​ ​respect​ ​or
reputation​ ​is​ ​most​ ​important​ ​for​ ​children​ ​and​ ​adolescents​ ​and​ ​precedes​ ​real​ ​self-esteem​ ​or​ ​dignity.
And​ ​the​ ​top​ ​level​ ​which​ ​is​ ​Self-actualization​ ​needs​ ​or​ ​realizing​ ​personal​ ​potential,​ ​self-fulfillment,
seeking​ ​personal​ ​growth​ ​and​ ​peak​ ​experiences​ ​is​ ​known​ ​as​ ​growth​ ​or​ ​being​ ​needs​ ​(B-needs).

R:​ ​Deficiency​ ​needs​ ​arise​ ​due​ ​to​ ​deprivation​ ​and​ ​are​ ​said​ ​to​ ​motivate​ ​people​ ​when​ ​they​ ​are​ ​unmet.​ ​Also,
the​ ​motivation​ ​to​ ​fulfill​ ​such​ ​needs​ ​will​ ​become​ ​stronger​ ​the​ ​longer​ ​the​ ​duration​ ​they​ ​are​ ​denied.​ ​For
example,​ ​the​ ​longer​ ​a​ ​person​ ​goes​ ​without​ ​food,​ ​the​ ​more​ ​hungry​ ​they​ ​will​ ​become.​ ​This​ ​will​ ​become
interesting​ ​later​ ​in​ ​this​ ​discussion.

P:​ ​When​ ​a​ ​deficit​ ​need​ ​has​ ​been​ ​'more​ ​or​ ​less'​ ​satisfied​ ​it​ ​will​ ​go​ ​away,​ ​and​ ​our​ ​activities​ ​become
habitually​ ​directed​ ​towards​ ​meeting​ ​the​ ​next​ ​set​ ​of​ ​needs​ ​that​ ​we​ ​have​ ​yet​ ​to​ ​satisfy.​ ​These​ ​then​ ​become
our​ ​salient​ ​needs.​ ​However,​ ​growth​ ​needs​ ​continue​ ​to​ ​be​ ​felt​ ​and​ ​may​ ​even​ ​become​ ​stronger​ ​once​ ​they
have​ ​been​ ​engaged.

R:​ ​Well,​ ​love​ ​or​ ​our​ ​“need”​ ​for​ ​love​ ​fall​ ​under​ ​the​ ​3rd​ ​tier​ ​of​ ​the​ ​triangle​ ​which​ ​is​ ​about​ ​love​ ​and
belongingness.

P:​ ​The​ ​third​ ​level​ ​of​ ​the​ ​said​ ​pyramid​ ​consists​ ​of​ ​the​ ​love​ ​and​ ​belonging​ ​needs.​ ​Basically,​ ​Maslow’s
theory​ ​suggests​ ​that​ ​each​ ​of​ ​us​ ​has​ ​this​ ​innate​ ​need​ ​to​ ​create​ ​meaningful​ ​relationships​ ​with​ ​people​ ​around
us.​ ​How​ ​do​ ​we​ ​define​ ​need​ ​anyway?​ ​A​ ​need​ ​is​ ​something​ ​necessary​ ​for​ ​our​ ​own​ ​survival.​ ​It​ ​is​ ​something
we​ ​strive​ ​to​ ​attain​ ​a​ ​healthy​ ​and​ ​well-balanced​ ​life;​ ​moreover,​ ​a​ ​deficiency​ ​of​ ​such​ ​can​ ​cause​ ​negative
impact​ ​in​ ​our​ ​way​ ​of​ ​living.​ ​If​ ​love​ ​and​ ​belongingness​ ​are​ ​needs,​ ​how​ ​can​ ​we​ ​be​ ​able​ ​to​ ​attain​ ​it?
Love​ ​and​ ​belongingness​ ​when​ ​put​ ​together​ ​create​ ​in​ ​us​ ​a​ ​strong​ ​motivation​ ​to​ ​be​ ​with​ ​people​ ​and​ ​be​ ​part
of​ ​something​ ​that​ ​is​ ​greater​ ​than​ ​ourselves.​ ​It​ ​is​ ​the​ ​need​ ​to​ ​give​ ​and​ ​receive​ ​affection​ ​in​ ​ways​ ​that​ ​will
satisfy​ ​our​ ​desire​ ​to​ ​love​ ​and​ ​be​ ​loved.​ ​Sad​ ​to​ ​say,​ ​a​ ​common​ ​mentality​ ​seen​ ​in​ ​some​ ​romantic
relationships​ ​defies​ ​the​ ​true​ ​essence​ ​of​ ​these​ ​needs.​ ​Love​ ​and​ ​belonging​ ​needs​ ​are​ ​supposed​ ​to​ ​be​ ​met​ ​by
an​ ​individual​ ​alone.​ ​It​ ​should​ ​not​ ​be​ ​entrusted​ ​to​ ​your​ ​partner,​ ​family​ ​or​ ​even​ ​friends.​ ​It​ ​is​ ​not​ ​their​ ​job​ ​to
satisfy​ ​these​ ​needs​ ​for​ ​you.​ ​People​ ​end​ ​up​ ​lonely​ ​and​ ​depressed​ ​not​ ​because​ ​of​ ​their​ ​lack​ ​of​ ​social
interaction​ ​rather,​ ​they​ ​have​ ​failed​ ​to​ ​meet​ ​these​ ​needs​ ​in​ ​a​ ​way​ ​that​ ​can​ ​make​ ​themselves​ ​happy.

R:​ ​Another​ ​interesting​ ​concept,​ ​I​ ​would​ ​like​ ​to​ ​add​ ​is​ ​Self-determination​ ​theory.​ ​According​ ​to​ ​this​ ​theory
there​ ​are​ ​3​ ​inborn​ ​and​ ​universal​ ​ ​needs​ ​that​ ​help​ ​people​ ​gain​ ​their​ ​whole​ ​self,​ ​and​ ​a​ ​healthy​ ​relationship
with​ ​other​ ​people​ ​namely:​ ​Autonomy,​ ​Competent,​ ​and​ ​most​ ​importantly​ ​for​ ​this​ ​discussion,​ ​Relatedness.

P:​ ​It​ ​is​ ​said​ ​that​ ​Relatedness​ ​is​ ​our​ ​need​ ​to​ ​feel​ ​a​ ​sense​ ​of​ ​belonging,​ ​intimacy,​ ​security​ ​in​ ​relationship
with​ ​others​ ​(e.g.​ ​right​ ​to​ ​belong​ ​in​ ​one​ ​group​ ​either​ ​ethnic​ ​groups,​ ​organizations,​ ​etc.)​ ​but​ ​an​ ​interesting
fact​ ​is​ ​that​ ​Ryan​ ​and​ ​Deci​ ​believe​ ​that​ ​a​ ​person​ ​can​ ​only​ ​satisfy​ ​these​ ​needs​ ​if​ ​she​ ​has​ ​a​ ​supportive
environment.

P:Ohh!​ ​That​ ​could​ ​be​ ​why​ ​we​ ​nturally​ ​feel​ ​kilig​ ​when​ ​someone​ ​give​ ​us​ ​gifts.​ ​We​ ​feel​ ​the​ ​care​ ​and
support.​ ​Now​ ​that​ ​makes​ ​sense.​ ​And​ ​in​ ​order​ ​to​ ​help​ ​us​ ​fulfill​ ​this​ ​need,​ ​let’s​ ​define​ ​the​ ​concept​ ​of
“love”?​ ​What​ ​do​ ​you​ ​think?​ ​How​ ​do​ ​you​ ​make-sense​ ​of​ ​love?

P:​ ​Love​ ​can​ ​be​ ​defined​ ​by​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​aspects​ ​in​ ​our​ ​society:​ ​religion,​ ​culture,​ ​environment,​ ​language,
upbringing,​ ​etc.

R:​ ​Well,​ ​love,​ ​for​ ​me,​ ​is​ ​like​ ​sacrificing​ ​yourself​ ​to​ ​the​ ​person​ ​no​ ​matter​ ​what​ ​happens.

P:​ ​Yeah,​ ​I​ ​watched​ ​this​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​love.​ ​The​ ​definition​ ​of​ ​the​ ​speaker​ ​was​ ​that​ ​“Love​ ​is​ ​putting​ ​your
partner’s​ ​needs​ ​before​ ​yourself​ ​unconditionally”

R:​ ​Martyr.​ ​A​ ​trend​ ​in​ ​both​ ​our​ ​definitions​ ​is​ ​that​ ​it’s​ ​kind​ ​of​ ​patriarchal,​ ​in​ ​a​ ​sense,​ ​especially​ ​we’re​ ​both
women.Is​ ​love​ ​even​ ​fair?

P:​ ​Well​ ​love​ ​is​ ​a​ ​pretty​ ​broad​ ​concept.​ ​We​ ​saw​ ​that​ ​at​ ​the​ ​first​ ​part​ ​of​ ​today’s​ ​episode;​ ​how​ ​various​ ​people
have​ ​various​ ​definitions​ ​of​ ​love.​ ​Is​ ​there​ ​a​ ​sole​ ​definition?

R:​ ​There​ ​is​ ​no​ ​one​ ​definition​ ​but​ ​there​ ​are​ ​tons​ ​of​ ​theories​ ​that​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​love.​ ​According​ ​to​ ​Cicarelli,
love​ ​in​ ​dictionary​ ​is​ ​a​ ​strong​ ​affection​ ​for​ ​another​ ​person​ ​due​ ​to​ ​kinship,​ ​personal​ ​ties​ ​or​ ​common
interests.​ ​To​ ​understand​ ​more​ ​about​ ​why​ ​and​ ​how​ ​we​ ​love,​ ​let’s​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​a​ ​popular​ ​one,​ ​ ​Sternberg’s
Triangle​ ​of​ ​Love,​ ​which​ ​describes​ ​the​ ​components​ ​and​ ​types​ ​of​ ​love.

P:​ ​I’ve​ ​heard​ ​of​ ​this.​ ​Sternberg’s​ ​Triangle​ ​of​ ​love​ ​puts​ ​love​ ​in​ ​a​ ​literal​ ​triangle.​ ​Imagine​ ​a​ ​triangle;​ ​there
are​ ​3​ ​noncollinear​ ​points​ ​right?​ ​Imagine​ ​that​ ​each​ ​of​ ​these​ ​3​ ​points​ ​represent​ ​a​ ​component.​ ​The​ ​3
components​ ​Sternberg’s​ ​framework​ ​addresses​ ​are​ ​Intimacy,​ ​Passion,​ ​and​ ​Commitment.
R:​ ​Yes,​ ​and​ ​that​ ​when​ ​these​ ​points​ ​are​ ​connected​ ​and​ ​combined,​ ​sides​ ​are​ ​formed​ ​representing​ ​the​ ​types
of​ ​love.​ ​Now​ ​let’s​ ​define​ ​each​ ​component​ ​first.​ ​Passion​​ ​can​ ​be​ ​associated​ ​with​ ​either​ ​physical​ ​arousal​ ​or
emotional​ ​stimulation.​ ​It​ ​could​ ​be​ ​a​ ​strong​ ​feeling​ ​of​ ​enthusiasm​ ​or​ ​excitement​ ​for​ ​something​ ​or​ ​about
doing​ ​something,​ ​or​ ​a​ ​strong​ ​feeling​ ​(such​ ​as​ ​anger)​ ​that​ ​causes​ ​people​ ​to​ ​act​ ​in​ ​a​ ​dangerous​ ​way,​ ​or​ ​a
strong​ ​sexual​ ​or​ ​romantic​ ​feeling​ ​for​ ​someone.​ ​Then​ ​there​ ​is​​ ​Intimacy​​ ​which​ ​is​ ​described​ ​as​ ​the​ ​feelings
of​ ​closeness​ ​and​ ​attachment​ ​to​ ​one​ ​another.​ ​This​ ​tends​ ​to​ ​strengthen​ ​the​ ​tight​ ​bond​ ​that​ ​is​ ​shared​ ​between
those​ ​two​ ​individuals.​ ​Additionally,​ ​having​ ​a​ ​sense​ ​of​ ​intimacy​ ​helps​ ​create​ ​the​ ​feeling​ ​of​ ​being​ ​at​ ​ease
with​ ​one​ ​another,​ ​in​ ​the​ ​sense​ ​that​ ​the​ ​two​ ​parties​ ​are​ ​mutual​ ​in​ ​their​ ​feelings.​ ​Intimacy​ ​is​ ​primarily
defined​ ​as​ ​something​ ​of​ ​a​ ​personal​ ​or​ ​private​ ​nature;​ ​familiarity.​ ​Lastly,​ ​ ​Commitment​:​ ​Unlike​ ​the​ ​other
two​ ​blocks,​ ​commitment​ ​involves​ ​a​ ​conscious​ ​decision​ ​to​ ​stick​ ​with​ ​one​ ​another.​ ​The​ ​decision​ ​to​ ​remain
committed​ ​is​ ​mainly​ ​determined​ ​by​ ​the​ ​level​ ​of​ ​satisfaction​ ​that​ ​a​ ​partner​ ​derives​ ​from​ ​the​ ​relationship.
There​ ​are​ ​three​ ​ways​ ​to​ ​define​ ​commitment:​ ​A​ ​promise​ ​to​ ​do​ ​or​ ​give​ ​something,​ ​A​ ​promise​ ​to​ ​be​ ​loyal​ ​to
someone​ ​or​ ​something,​ ​the​ ​attitude​ ​of​ ​someone​ ​who​ ​works​ ​very​ ​hard​ ​to​ ​do​ ​or​ ​support​ ​something".

P:​ ​The​ ​amount​ ​of​ ​love​ ​one​ ​experiences​ ​depends​ ​on​ ​the​ ​absolute​ ​strength​ ​of​ ​these​ ​three​ ​components,​ ​and
the​ ​type​ ​of​ ​love​ ​one​ ​experiences​ ​depends​ ​on​ ​their​ ​strengths​ ​relative​ ​to​ ​each​ ​other."

R:​ ​The​ ​forms​ ​of​ ​love​ ​are​ ​namely:​ ​Non​ ​love​ ​The​ ​absence​ ​of​ ​any​ ​of​ ​the​ ​three​ ​types​ ​of​ ​love.​ ​No​ ​connection.
Indifferent​ ​to​ ​relationship.​ ​Liking/friendship​ ​This​ ​type​ ​of​ ​love​ ​is​ ​intimacy​ ​without​ ​passion​ ​or
commitment.​ ​This​ ​includes​ ​friendships​ ​and​ ​acquaintances.​ ​Infatuated​ ​love:​ ​Infatuated​ ​love​ ​is​ ​passion
without​ ​intimacy​ ​or​ ​commitment.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​considered​ ​"puppy​ ​love"​ ​or​ ​relationships​ ​that​ ​have​ ​not​ ​become
serious​ ​yet.​ ​Romantic​ ​relationships​ ​often​ ​start​ ​out​ ​as​ ​infatuated​ ​love​ ​and​ ​become​ ​romantic​ ​love​ ​as
intimacy​ ​develops​ ​over​ ​time.​ ​Without​ ​developing​ ​intimacy​ ​or​ ​commitment,​ ​infatuated​ ​love​ ​may​ ​disappear
suddenly.

P:​ ​Empty​ ​love​ ​is​ ​characterized​ ​by​ ​commitment​ ​without​ ​intimacy​ ​or​ ​passion.​ ​A​ ​stronger​ ​love​ ​may
deteriorate​ ​into​ ​empty​ ​love.​ ​In​ ​an​ ​arranged​ ​marriage,​ ​the​ ​spouses'​ ​relationship​ ​may​ ​begin​ ​as​ ​empty​ ​love
and​ ​develop​ ​into​ ​another​ ​form,​ ​indicating​ ​"how​ ​empty​ ​love​ ​need​ ​not​ ​be​ ​the​ ​terminal​ ​state​ ​of​ ​a​ ​long-term
relationship...[but]​ ​the​ ​beginning​ ​rather​ ​than​ ​the​ ​end".​ ​Romantic​ ​love​ ​This​ ​love​ ​is​ ​passionate​ ​and​ ​intimate
but​ ​has​ ​no​ ​commitment.​ ​This​ ​could​ ​be​ ​considered​ ​a​ ​romantic​ ​affair​ ​or​ ​could​ ​be​ ​a​ ​one-night​ ​stand.
Companionate​ ​love​ ​is​ ​an​ ​intimate,​ ​non-passionate​ ​type​ ​of​ ​love​ ​that​ ​is​ ​stronger​ ​than​ ​friendship​ ​because​ ​of
the​ ​element​ ​of​ ​long-term​ ​commitment.​ ​"This​ ​type​ ​of​ ​love​ ​is​ ​observed​ ​in​ ​long-term​ ​marriages​ ​where
passion​ ​is​ ​no​ ​longer​ ​present"​ ​but​ ​where​ ​a​ ​deep​ ​affection​ ​and​ ​commitment​ ​remain.​ ​The​ ​love​ ​ideally​ ​shared
between​ ​family​ ​members​ ​is​ ​a​ ​form​ ​of​ ​companionate​ ​love,​ ​as​ ​is​ ​the​ ​love​ ​between​ ​close​ ​friends​ ​who​ ​have​ ​a
platonic​ ​but​ ​strong​ ​friendship.

R:​ ​Fatuous​ ​love​ ​can​ ​be​ ​exemplified​ ​by​ ​a​ ​whirlwind​ ​courtship​ ​and​ ​marriage—it​ ​has​ ​points​ ​of​ ​passion​ ​and
commitment​ ​but​ ​no​ ​intimacy.​ ​An​ ​example​ ​of​ ​this​ ​is​ ​"love​ ​at​ ​first​ ​sight".​ ​Consummate​ ​love​ ​is​ ​the​ ​complete
form​ ​of​ ​love,​ ​representing​ ​an​ ​ideal​ ​relationship​ ​which​ ​people​ ​strive​ ​towards.​ ​Of​ ​the​ ​seven​ ​varieties​ ​of
love,​ ​consummate​ ​love​ ​is​ ​theorized​ ​to​ ​be​ ​that​ ​love​ ​associated​ ​with​ ​the​ ​"perfect​ ​couple".
P:​ ​According​ ​to​ ​Sternberg,​ ​these​ ​couples​ ​will​ ​continue​ ​to​ ​have​ ​great​ ​sex​ ​fifteen​ ​years​ ​or​ ​more​ ​into​ ​the
relationship,​ ​they​ ​cannot​ ​imagine​ ​themselves​ ​happier​ ​over​ ​the​ ​long-term​ ​with​ ​anyone​ ​else,​ ​they​ ​overcome
their​ ​few​ ​difficulties​ ​gracefully,​ ​and​ ​each​ ​delight​ ​in​ ​the​ ​relationship​ ​with​ ​one​ ​another.

R:​ ​However,​ ​Sternberg​ ​cautions​ ​that​ ​maintaining​ ​a​ ​consummate​ ​love​ ​may​ ​be​ ​even​ ​harder​ ​than​ ​achieving
it.​ ​He​ ​stresses​ ​the​ ​importance​ ​of​ ​translating​ ​the​ ​components​ ​of​ ​love​ ​into​ ​action.

P:​ ​Different​ ​stages​ ​and​ ​types​ ​of​ ​love​ ​can​ ​be​ ​explained​ ​as​ ​different​ ​combinations​ ​of​ ​these​ ​three​ ​elements;
for​ ​example,​ ​the​ ​relative​ ​emphasis​ ​of​ ​each​ ​component​ ​changes​ ​over​ ​time​ ​as​ ​an​ ​adult​ ​romantic​ ​relationship
develops.​ ​A​ ​relationship​ ​based​ ​on​ ​a​ ​single​ ​element​ ​is​ ​less​ ​likely​ ​to​ ​survive​ ​than​ ​one​ ​based​ ​on​ ​two​ ​or​ ​three
elements.

R:​ ​From​ ​this​ ​conceptualization,​ ​we​ ​could​ ​say​ ​that​ ​love​ ​is​ ​quite​ ​dynamic.

P:​ ​I​ ​agree.​ ​What​ ​I​ ​really​ ​like​ ​about​ ​this​ ​framework​ ​is​ ​that​ ​is​ ​does​ ​not​ ​dismiss​ ​or​ ​undermine​ ​other​ ​forms​ ​of
love​ ​like​ ​if​ ​my​ ​relationship​ ​with​ ​my​ ​boyfriend​ ​is​ ​simply​ ​passion​ ​and​ ​intimacy​ ​then​ ​it​ ​does​ ​not​ ​mean​ ​that​ ​it
is​ ​a​ ​greater​ ​type​ ​of​ ​love​ ​that​ ​having​ ​commitment​ ​in​ ​our​ ​relationship.
R:​ ​Although,​ ​it​ ​is​ ​ideal;​ ​to​ ​have​ ​all​ ​the​ ​components​ ​of​ ​love​ ​in​ ​one​ ​relationship​ ​to​ ​form​ ​a​ ​consummate​ ​love
which​ ​is​ ​said​ ​to​ ​be​ ​seen​ ​from​ ​long​ ​term​ ​married​ ​couples.​ ​Amazing,​ ​right?​ ​But​ ​for​ ​the​ ​sake​ ​of​ ​this
discussion,​ ​we’ll​ ​be​ ​focusing​ ​on​ ​romantic​ ​love.

R:​ ​Now​ ​we​ ​have​ ​a​ ​general​ ​understanding​ ​of​ ​what​ ​is​ ​love​ ​and​ ​why​ ​do​ ​we​ ​love.​ ​Another​ ​question​ ​that
comes​ ​into​ ​mind​ ​is​ ​why​ ​do​ ​we​ ​like​ ​the​ ​people​ ​we​ ​like?

P:​ ​Well,​ ​the​ ​rules​ ​of​ ​attraction​ ​explain​ ​this​ ​by​ ​saying​ ​that​ ​Interpersonal​ ​attraction​ ​is​ ​influenced​ ​by​ ​many
forms,​ ​including​ ​liking,​ ​love,​ ​friendship,​ ​lust,​ ​and​ ​admiration.

R:​ ​Many​ ​factors​ ​influence​ ​whom​ ​people​ ​are​ ​attracted​ ​to.​ ​They​ ​include​ ​physical​ ​attractiveness,​ ​proximity,
similarity,​ ​and​ ​reciprocity:

P:​ ​First,​ ​Physical​ ​attractiveness:​ ​Research​ ​shows​ ​that​ ​romantic​ ​attraction​ ​is​ ​primarily​ ​determined​ ​by
physical​ ​attractiveness.​ ​In​ ​the​ ​early​ ​stages​ ​of​ ​dating,​ ​people​ ​are​ ​more​ ​attracted​ ​to​ ​partners​ ​whom​ ​they
consider​ ​to​ ​be​ ​physically​ ​attractive.​ ​Men​ ​are​ ​more​ ​likely​ ​to​ ​value​ ​physical​ ​attractiveness​ ​than​ ​are​ ​women.
People’s​ ​perception​ ​of​ ​their​ ​own​ ​physical​ ​attractiveness​ ​also​ ​plays​ ​a​ ​role​ ​in​ ​romantic​ ​love.​ ​The​ ​matching
hypothesis​ ​proposes​ ​that​ ​people​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​pick​ ​partners​ ​who​ ​are​ ​about​ ​equal​ ​in​ ​level​ ​of​ ​attractiveness​ ​to
themselves.

R:​ ​Then​ ​there​ ​is​ ​Proximity:​ ​People​ ​are​ ​more​ ​likely​ ​to​ ​become​ ​friends​ ​with​ ​people​ ​who​ ​are​ ​geographically
close.​ ​One​ ​explanation​ ​for​ ​this​ ​is​ ​the​ ​mere​ ​exposure​ ​effect.​ ​The​ ​mere​ ​exposure​ ​effect​ ​refers​ ​to​ ​people’s
tendency​ ​to​ ​like​ ​novel​ ​stimuli​ ​more​ ​if​ ​they​ ​encounter​ ​them​ ​repeatedly.

P:​ ​Another​ ​one​ ​is​ ​Similarity:​ ​People​ ​also​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​pick​ ​partners​ ​who​ ​are​ ​similar​ ​to​ ​themselves​ ​in
characteristics​ ​such​ ​as​ ​age,​ ​race,​ ​religion,​ ​social​ ​class,​ ​personality,​ ​education,​ ​intelligence,​ ​and​ ​attitude.
This​ ​similarity​ ​is​ ​seen​ ​not​ ​only​ ​between​ ​romantic​ ​partners​ ​but​ ​also​ ​between​ ​friends.​ ​Some​ ​researchers
have​ ​suggested​ ​that​ ​similarity​ ​causes​ ​attraction.​ ​Others​ ​acknowledge​ ​that​ ​people​ ​may​ ​be​ ​more​ ​likely​ ​to
have​ ​friends​ ​and​ ​partners​ ​who​ ​are​ ​similar​ ​to​ ​themselves​ ​simply​ ​because​ ​of​ ​accessibility:​ ​people​ ​are​ ​more
likely​ ​to​ ​associate​ ​with​ ​people​ ​who​ ​are​ ​similar​ ​to​ ​themselves.

R:​ ​Lastly,​ ​Reciprocity:​ ​People​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​like​ ​others​ ​who​ ​reciprocate​ ​their​ ​liking.

P:​ ​Wow,​ ​love​ ​can​ ​really​ ​be​ ​manipulated.​ ​Is​ ​there​ ​really​ ​such​ ​thing​ ​as​ ​true​ ​love?

R:​ ​Okay,​ ​recap.​ ​For​ ​the​ ​first​ ​part​ ​of​ ​this​ ​episode,​ ​we​ ​talked​ ​about​ ​the​ ​Triangle​ ​of​ ​Love​ ​focusing​ ​on​ ​the
components​ ​and​ ​forms​ ​of​ ​love,​ ​Maslow’s​ ​Hierarchy​ ​of​ ​Needs​ ​focusing​ ​on​ ​the​ ​3rd​ ​tier,​ ​Self-determination
theory​ ​focusing​ ​on​ ​relatedness,​ ​and​ ​the​ ​rules​ ​of​ ​attraction.​ ​We’ll​ ​take​ ​a​ ​break​ ​from​ ​all​ ​the​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​the
academic​ ​attack​ ​on​ ​love.​ ​When​ ​we​ ​return,​ ​it’s​ ​KDrama​ ​time!

BREAK

P:​ ​And​ ​we’re​ ​back!

R:​ ​And​ ​again,​ ​this​ ​is​ ​Chinito​ ​ang​ ​pipiliin​ ​mo~

P:​ ​After​ ​talking​ ​about​ ​love​ ​and​ ​what​ ​it​ ​is,​ ​why​ ​do​ ​we​ ​do​ ​it,​ ​and​ ​what​ ​influences​ ​why​ ​we​ ​do​ ​it,​ ​let’s​ ​talk
about​ ​the​ ​next​ ​half​ ​of​ ​today’s​ ​topic​ ​which​ ​is​ ​KDrama.​ ​If​ ​we​ ​replay​ ​the​ ​video​ ​we​ ​watched/​ ​listened​ ​to
earlier,​ ​we​ ​could​ ​see​ ​how​ ​the​ ​girl​ ​said​ ​and​ ​I​ ​quote​ ​“​Yung​ ​totoong​ ​forever!​ ​Sa​ ​totoo​ ​lang,​ ​I​ ​just​ ​want​ ​to​ ​be
as​ ​happy​ ​like,​ ​like​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​babae​ ​sa​ ​KDrama.​ ​Oo,​ ​parang​ ​yung​ ​mga​ ​babae​ ​sa​ ​KDrama.​”

R:​ ​Wow,​ ​actress.​ ​Anyway,​ ​I​ ​saw​ ​that​ ​too.​ ​She​ ​mentioned​ ​that​ ​she​ ​just​ ​wanted​ ​to​ ​be​ ​as​ ​happy​ ​as​ ​the​ ​girls
in​ ​KDrama​ ​when​ ​in​ ​a​ ​relationship.​ ​AS​ ​if​ ​the​ ​ideal​ ​happy​ ​women​ ​in​ ​love​ ​is​ ​like​ ​the​ ​ones​ ​in​ ​KDrama.

P:​ ​I​ ​couldn’t​ ​blame​ ​her.​ ​KDrama​ ​relationships​ ​really​ ​do​ ​fuel​ ​your​ ​romantic​ ​instincts.​ ​I,​ ​myself,​ ​am​ ​not
much​ ​of​ ​an​ ​avid​ ​watcher​ ​of​ ​romance​ ​or​ ​love​ ​stories​ ​but​ ​something​ ​about​ ​KDrama​ ​got​ ​me​ ​hooked.

R:​ ​Well,​ ​from​ ​the​ ​concept​ ​we​ ​have​ ​discussed​ ​earlier.​ ​A​ ​very​ ​obvious​ ​influence​ ​why​ ​the​ ​KDrama​ ​love
story​ ​is​ ​ideal​ ​is​ ​because​ ​it​ ​reflects​ ​the​ ​rule​ ​of​ ​attraction​ ​which​ ​is​ ​attractiveness.​ ​I​ ​mean,​ ​come​ ​on.​ ​All​ ​the
boys​ ​in​ ​KDramas​ ​especially​ ​the​ ​leading​ ​men​ ​as​ ​so​ ​freaking​ ​gorgeous.

P:​ ​Well​ ​my​ ​prof​ ​went​ ​to​ ​Korean​ ​and​ ​she​ ​said​ ​that​ ​the​ ​men​ ​in​ ​Korean​ ​are​ ​not​ ​like​ ​what​ ​we​ ​see​ ​in​ ​the
dramas.​ ​You​ ​know,​ ​media​ ​and​ ​its​ ​portrayals.

R:​ ​Media​ ​just​ ​loves​ ​to​ ​trick​ ​us,​ ​kidding.​ ​It​ ​is​ ​said​ ​that​ ​the​ ​first​ ​step​ ​to​ ​love​ ​is​ ​attraction.​ ​So​ ​we​ ​are​ ​on​ ​the
right​ ​track.
P:​ ​Yes.​ ​Realizing​ ​that​ ​a​ ​person​ ​is​ ​attractive​ ​is​ ​a​ ​part​ ​of​ ​the​ ​initial​ ​attraction​ ​stage.​ ​Wherein​ ​it’s​ ​the
powerful​ ​moment​ ​when​ ​we​ ​meet​ ​another​ ​person​ ​and​ ​feel​ ​energized​ ​and​ ​are​ ​immediately​ ​aware​ ​of​ ​our
heart​ ​pounding.​ ​The​ ​presence​ ​of​ ​cute​ ​boys​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​do​ ​that.

R:​ ​I​ ​think​ ​it​ ​would​ ​be​ ​pretty​ ​hard​ ​to​ ​tackle​ ​all​ ​Korean​ ​dramas​ ​in​ ​a​ ​short​ ​amount​ ​of​ ​time​ ​of​ ​this​ ​podcast.

P:​ ​Well,​ ​yeah,​ ​we​ ​can’t​ ​talk​ ​and​ ​analyse​ ​all​ ​the​ ​Korean​ ​Dramas​ ​out​ ​there.​ ​It​ ​would​ ​take​ ​us​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​air
time.​ ​So​ ​why​ ​don’t​ ​we​ ​discuss​ ​the​ ​similarities​ ​in​ ​their​ ​plot​ ​lines.​ ​Maybe,​ ​from​ ​there,​ ​we​ ​could​ ​synthesize
why​ ​the​ ​KDrama​ ​love​ ​life​ ​is​ ​so​ ​ideal.

R:​ ​I​ ​have​ ​a​ ​list​ ​of​ ​the​ ​most​ ​common​ ​Korean​ ​Drama​ ​cliches​ ​and​ ​plot​ ​lines​ ​and​ ​coming​ ​at​ ​number​ ​15​ ​is​ ​the
accidental​ ​kiss.​ ​Something​ ​about​ ​the​ ​accidental​ ​kiss​ ​implies​ ​fate​ ​or​ ​a​ ​forever.

P:​ ​In​ ​my​ ​opinion,​ ​something​ ​about​ ​an​ ​accidental​ ​kiss​ ​seems​ ​so​ ​attached.​ ​Like​ ​I​ ​could​ ​fall​ ​any​ ​way​ ​I​ ​could
have​ ​but​ ​to​ ​fall​ ​and​ ​land​ ​squarely​ ​on​ ​top​ ​of​ ​the​ ​lips​ ​of​ ​the​ ​person​ ​implies​ ​that​ ​I​ ​am​ ​meant​ ​to​ ​be​ ​with​ ​this
person​ ​don’t​ ​you​ ​think?

R:​ ​Attachment,​ ​in​ ​that​ ​plot​ ​line,​ ​is​ ​the​ ​need​ ​to​ ​receive​ ​care,​ ​approval,​ ​and​ ​physical​ ​contact​ ​with​ ​the​ ​other
person.​ ​If​ ​I’m​ ​not​ ​mistaken,​ ​most​ ​of​ ​the​ ​“accidental​ ​kisses”​ ​in​ ​KDramas​ ​would​ ​involve​ ​the​ ​girl​ ​tripping
and​ ​being​ ​catched​ ​by​ ​the​ ​boy.

P:​ ​This​ ​part​ ​of​ ​attraction,​ ​attachment,​ ​primes​ ​the​ ​next​ ​stages​ ​of​ ​attraction.​ ​A​ ​kiss​ ​itself​ ​fuels​ ​our​ ​system
which​ ​is​ ​also​ ​related​ ​to​ ​the​ ​initial​ ​attraction​ ​stage​ ​as​ ​mention​ ​before.​ ​Specific​ ​chemical​ ​substances​ ​such​ ​as
oxytocin,​ ​phenethylamine,​ ​and​ ​dopamine,​ ​have​ ​been​ ​found​ ​to​ ​play​ ​a​ ​role​ ​in​ ​human​ ​experiences​ ​and
behaviors​ ​that​ ​are​ ​associated​ ​with​ ​love.​ ​They​ ​function​ ​similar​ ​to​ ​amphetamine,​ ​making​ ​us​ ​alert,​ ​excited,
and​ ​wanting​ ​to​ ​bond.

R:​ ​Well,​ ​a​ ​kiss​ ​is​ ​really​ ​quite​ ​represent​ ​in​ ​KDramas.​ ​As​ ​if​ ​its​ ​is​ ​the​ ​most​ ​powerful​ ​symbol​ ​of​ ​love​ ​or
something.

P:​ ​Coming​ ​at​ ​number​ ​10,​ ​the​ ​switching​ ​bodies​ ​or​ ​pretending​ ​to​ ​be​ ​a​ ​boy​ ​cliche.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​not​ ​only​ ​applicable
to​ ​girls​ ​but​ ​mostly​ ​the​ ​leading​ ​men​ ​of​ ​KDramas​ ​embody​ ​some​ ​sort​ ​of​ ​femininity.​ ​May​ ​it​ ​be​ ​through​ ​their
physical​ ​appearance​ ​or​ ​even​ ​their​ ​movements​ ​and​ ​actions.

R:​ ​This​ ​is​ ​quite​ ​a​ ​common​ ​archetype​ ​across​ ​Korean​ ​dramas.​ ​ ​If​ ​I’m​ ​not​ ​mistaken,​ ​it’s​ ​deemed​ ​as​ ​the
flower​ ​boy​ ​genre.
P:​ ​I’ve​ ​read​ ​about​ ​this.​ ​“Flower​ ​Boys”​ ​are​ ​men​ ​who​ ​display​ ​feminine​ ​physical​ ​characteristics​ ​like​ ​soft
features​ ​of​ ​the​ ​face,​ ​lean,​ ​and​ ​with​ ​smooth​ ​skin.​ ​They​ ​are​ ​also,​ ​caring,​ ​sweet​ ​and​ ​thoughtful.​ ​Women
nowadays​ ​are​ ​hooked​ ​to​ ​these​ ​men​ ​because​ ​they​ ​empower​ ​women​ ​that​ ​being​ ​soft​ ​is​ ​vulnerable​ ​yet
engaging.​ ​Furthermore,​ ​these​ ​flower​ ​boys​ ​defy​ ​the​ ​society’s​ ​standards​ ​of​ ​a​ ​normal​ ​man​ ​which​ ​should​ ​be
rough,​ ​bulky,​ ​and​ ​brave​ ​never​ ​beautiful​ ​because​ ​of​ ​them​ ​men​ ​can​ ​be​ ​more​ ​comfortable​ ​being​ ​soft,​ ​and
vulnerable.
R:​ ​Oh,​ ​so​ ​because​ ​these​ ​traits​ ​that​ ​they​ ​possess,​ ​they​ ​empower​ ​both​ ​genders.

P:​ ​Coming​ ​at​ ​number​ ​9​ ​is​ ​one​ ​of​ ​my​ ​fave​ ​cliches​ ​so​ ​far,​ ​which​ ​is​ ​main​ ​girl​ ​is​ ​just​ ​there​ ​to​ ​eat​ ​large
amounts​ ​of​ ​food​ ​ALL​ ​THE​ ​TIME.

R:​ ​That’s​ ​funny​ ​but​ ​so​ ​true.I​ ​mean,​ ​we​ ​all​ ​know​ ​that​ ​food​ ​is​ ​a​ ​fundamental​ ​human​ ​need​ ​that​ ​influences
both​ ​physiological​ ​and​ ​emotional​ ​states.​ ​Researchers​ ​showed,​ ​for​ ​instance,​ ​that​ ​when​ ​daily​ ​hassles
increased,​ ​women​ ​with​ ​high​ ​cortisol​ ​reactivity​ ​increased​ ​their​ ​food​ ​intake.

P:​ ​It​ ​should​ ​also​ ​be​ ​pointed​ ​out​ ​that​ ​scenes​ ​in​ ​KDramas​ ​usually​ ​revolve​ ​around​ ​delicious​ ​food.​ ​Like​ ​most
social​ ​interaction​ ​that​ ​the​ ​leads​ ​do​ ​is​ ​while​ ​eating​ ​food.​ ​An​ ​explanation​ ​for​ ​that​ ​is​ ​that​ ​food​ ​sharing
appears​ ​to​ ​be​ ​a​ ​highly​ ​adaptive​ ​trait​ ​even​ ​among​ ​non-family​ ​members​ ​in​ ​that​ ​it​ ​may​ ​facilitate​ ​cooperation,
allow​ ​for​ ​relationship​ ​maintenance,​ ​and​ ​create​ ​mating​ ​opportunities.

R:​ ​Research​ ​also​ ​ ​suggest​ ​that​ ​the​ ​offer​ ​of​ ​food​ ​by​ ​an​ ​empathic​ ​provider​ ​is​ ​motivated​ ​by​ ​the​ ​emotional
state​ ​of​ ​one’s​ ​interaction​ ​partner​ ​(recipient).​ ​By​ ​offering​ ​food,​ ​the​ ​provider​ ​not​ ​only​ ​aims​ ​to​ ​attenuate​ ​the
recipient’s​ ​negative​ ​affect​ ​but​ ​also​ ​his​ ​own.​ ​Food​ ​offering​ ​thereby​ ​becomes​ ​a​ ​means​ ​to​ ​increase​ ​positive
affect​ ​for​ ​both​ ​recipient​ ​and​ ​–​ ​when​ ​the​ ​offer​ ​has​ ​the​ ​desired​ ​effect​ ​–​ ​provider.​ ​This​ ​would​ ​explain​ ​why
most​ ​boys​ ​in​ ​KDrama,​ ​especially​ ​in​ ​Weightlifting​ ​Fairy,​ ​offer​ ​to​ ​eat​ ​when​ ​the​ ​girl​ ​is​ ​acting​ ​cranky.​ ​It’s​ ​a
strategy!

P:​ ​At​ ​number​ ​8​ ​and​ ​7,​ ​Rich,​ ​super-attractive,​ ​jerky​ ​male​ ​lead​ ​is​ ​ONLY​ ​interested​ ​in​ ​poor,
supposedly-ugly,​ ​sweet​ ​females​ ​and​ ​whom​ ​he​ ​occasionally​ ​gives​ ​a​ ​makeover​ ​to.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​an​ ​interesting
concept​ ​tho.​ ​I​ ​mean,​ ​shouldn’t​ ​you​ ​accept​ ​your​ ​love​ ​the​ ​way​ ​he/she​ ​is​ ​and​ ​not​ ​try​ ​to​ ​change​ ​them?

R:​ ​Yes,​ ​Romantic​ ​love​ ​or​ ​even​ ​infatuation​ ​is​ ​not​ ​the​ ​issue.​ ​The​ ​problem​ ​for​ ​many​ ​is​ ​the​ ​confusion​ ​of​ ​love
and​ ​obsession.​ ​Many​ ​believe​ ​that​ ​if​ ​they​ ​are​ ​not​ ​experiencing​ ​the​ ​dopamine​ ​and​ ​adrenaline​ ​induced​ ​highs
of​ ​new​ ​love,​ ​that​ ​then​ ​surely​ ​they​ ​must​ ​not​ ​be​ ​in​ ​love.​ ​It​ ​can​ ​be​ ​addictive​ ​to​ ​feel​ ​the​ ​throes​ ​of
uncontrollable​ ​and​ ​insatiable​ ​passion.​ ​This​ ​is​ ​where​ ​the​ ​difference​ ​of​ ​love​ ​and​ ​desire​ ​come​ ​into​ ​play.

P:​ ​I’ve​ ​heard​ ​of​ ​this.​ ​They​ ​say​ ​that​ ​desire​ ​and​ ​love​ ​are​ ​different.​ ​Desire​ ​is​ ​wanting​ ​while​ ​love​ ​is​ ​wanting
to​ ​have.​ ​ ​There​ ​are​ ​researches​ ​that​ ​have​ ​shown​ ​that​ ​in​ ​a​ ​long​ ​time​ ​relationship,​ ​desire​ ​dies​ ​down.​ ​Infidelity
studies​ ​tend​ ​to​ ​delve​ ​on​ ​these​ ​concepts.​ ​Well,​ ​logically​ ​you​ ​can’t​ ​want​ ​something​ ​you​ ​already​ ​have,​ ​right?
So​ ​what​ ​happens​ ​right​ ​when​ ​the​ ​hormones​ ​start​ ​to​ ​die​ ​down,​ ​one​ ​realizes​ ​that​ ​it​ ​wasn’t​ ​love​ ​after​ ​all.

R:​ ​That​ ​is​ ​sad​ ​and​ ​tragic.

P:​ ​Very​ ​anyway,​ ​coming​ ​at​ ​number​ ​6,​ ​Main​ ​Male​ ​Lead​ ​is​ ​CEO​ ​or​ ​Heir​ ​of​ ​Family​ ​Company​ ​(Chaebol).​ ​In
more​ ​simpler​ ​terms,​ ​secure​ ​and​ ​powerful.

R:​ ​This​ ​could​ ​be​ ​explained​ ​in​ ​evolutionary​ ​psychology.​ ​Easy,​ ​in​ ​the​ ​course​ ​of​ ​time​ ​and​ ​for​ ​survival,
women​ ​wanted​ ​security.​ ​It’s​ ​because​ ​they​ ​wanted​ ​a​ ​provider.​ ​Having​ ​the​ ​felt​ ​security​ ​that​ ​a​ ​partner​ ​is
“there​ ​for​ ​you,”​ ​not​ ​only​ ​makes​ ​for​ ​a​ ​smooth​ ​functioning​ ​relationship​ ​but​ ​also​ ​makes​ ​it​ ​easier​ ​to​ ​trust​ ​and
relax​ ​into​ ​romantic​ ​love.​ ​In​ ​contrast,​ ​individuals​ ​classified​ ​as​ ​“insecure”​ ​are​ ​less​ ​effective​ ​at​ ​using​ ​and
providing​ ​a​ ​consistent​ ​secure​ ​base​ ​for​ ​their​ ​partners,​ ​have​ ​lower​ ​satisfaction​ ​and​ ​greater​ ​conflict​ ​in
relationships,​ ​and​ ​also​ ​report​ ​lower​ ​self-esteem.​ ​Such​ ​events​ ​may​ ​heighten​ ​feelings​ ​of​ ​insecurity​ ​about​ ​the
relationship,​ ​and​ ​could​ ​manifest​ ​as​ ​obsessive​ ​love.

P:​ ​At​ ​number​ ​5​ ​are​ ​Love​ ​Triangles/Squares.

R:​ ​Going​ ​back​ ​to​ ​our​ ​initial​ ​discussion​ ​about​ ​love​ ​and​ ​desire.​ ​It​ ​is​ ​said​ ​that​ ​a​ ​person​ ​is​ ​considered​ ​most
desirable

P:​ ​Coming​ ​at​ ​number​ ​4,​ ​ ​a​ ​scene​ ​under​ ​the​ ​rain​ ​or​ ​somewhere​ ​wet.

R:​ ​Set​ ​the​ ​mood.​ ​There’s​ ​this​ ​cognitive​ ​theory​ ​that​ ​states​ ​that​ ​emotion​ ​comes​ ​after

P:​ ​We​ ​are​ ​almost​ ​towards​ ​the​ ​end​ ​and​ ​at​ ​number​ ​3,The​ ​Childhood​ ​Friends-Turned-Lovers​ ​Plot.​ ​When​ ​I
think​ ​about​ ​my​ ​early​ ​childhood,​ ​most​ ​of​ ​my​ ​memories​ ​are​ ​fuzzy​ ​at​ ​best.​ ​Even​ ​when​ ​recalling​ ​my​ ​first​ ​big
crush,​ ​I​ ​can’t​ ​remember​ ​much​ ​beyond​ ​his​ ​bouncy​ ​blonde​ ​hair​ ​as​ ​he​ ​ran​ ​around​ ​on​ ​the​ ​playground.​ ​It
seems​ ​like​ ​the​ ​inhabitants​ ​of​ ​K-drama​ ​land​ ​have​ ​super​ ​memory,​ ​as​ ​they​ ​can​ ​recall​ ​minute​ ​details​ ​when​ ​it
comes​ ​to​ ​childhood​ ​romances.​ ​After​ ​losing​ ​touch,​ ​they​ ​generally​ ​meet​ ​again​ ​years​ ​later​ ​as​ ​part​ ​of​ ​fate’s
ultimate​ ​plan.

R:​ ​This​ ​is​ ​quite​ ​obvious.​ ​Familiarity,​ ​right?​ ​We​ ​want​ ​someone​ ​who​ ​we​ ​have​ ​share​ ​memories​ ​with​ ​and
who​ ​already​ ​knows​ ​us.

P:​ ​At​ ​number​ ​2,​ ​Piggyback​ ​ride​ ​because​ ​shoes​ ​broke/leg​ ​injury/character​ ​is​ ​drunk,​ ​etc.

R:​ ​Proximity.

P:​ ​And​ ​our​ ​top​ ​1,​ ​ ​The​ ​“I​ ​Hate​ ​You,​ ​I​ ​Love​ ​You”​ ​Plot.​ ​If​ ​there​ ​is​ ​one​ ​thing​ ​K-dramas​ ​like​ ​more​ ​than
fateful​ ​childhood​ ​romances​ ​and​ ​second​ ​lead​ ​syndrome,​ ​it’s​ ​the​ ​“I​ ​hate​ ​you,​ ​I​ ​love​ ​you”​ ​plot.​ ​Seen​ ​in
numerous​ ​dramas​ ​already​ ​on​ ​this​ ​list,​ ​the​ ​series​ ​always​ ​starts​ ​off​ ​with​ ​a​ ​good​ ​old​ ​fashioned​ ​case​ ​of​ ​“I
wouldn’t​ ​marry​ ​you​ ​if​ ​you​ ​were​ ​the​ ​last​ ​person​ ​on​ ​earth!”​ ​In​ ​which​ ​case,​ ​we​ ​always​ ​know​ ​that​ ​the​ ​leads
will,​ ​in​ ​fact,​ ​end​ ​up​ ​dating​ ​or​ ​married.​ ​Despite​ ​knowing​ ​the​ ​outcome​ ​however,​ ​we​ ​still​ ​enjoy​ ​watching​ ​the
story​ ​unfold​ ​episode​ ​after​ ​episode.

R:​ ​There’s​ ​this​ ​theory​ ​in​ ​attraction​ ​that​ ​attraction​ ​is​ ​reaches​ ​its​ ​full​ ​potential​ ​when​ ​the​ ​person​ ​first​ ​has​ ​a
negative​ ​impression​ ​of​ ​the​ ​potential​ ​love​ ​interest​ ​then​ ​it​ ​changes​ ​into​ ​a​ ​positive​ ​one​ ​over​ ​time.​ ​The​ ​gain
loss​ ​theory!

P:​ ​Well​ ​that’s​ ​our​ ​top​ ​10.​ ​What​ ​do​ ​you​ ​think?

R:​ ​Funny​ ​how​ ​all​ ​these​ ​cliches​ ​and​ ​plot​ ​lines​ ​give​ ​us​ ​a​ ​happily​ ​ever​ ​after​ ​in​ ​the​ ​end​ ​of​ ​the​ ​series​ ​even
though​ ​they​ ​sound​ ​weird​ ​but​ ​they​ ​happen​ ​to​ ​be​ ​backed​ ​up​ ​by​ ​some​ ​science.​ ​There​ ​are​ ​explanations​ ​behind
all​ ​those​ ​cliches,​ ​ ​mostly​ ​psychology.​ ​So​ ​we​ ​could​ ​see​ ​here​ ​why​ ​KDrama​ ​affects​ ​us​ ​like​ ​the​ ​way​ ​it​ ​does.
Why​ ​it​ ​makes​ ​us​ ​believe​ ​that​ ​their​ ​love​ ​is​ ​happier.

P:​ ​In​ ​conclusion,​ ​a​ ​few​ ​tips​ ​and​ ​tricks​ ​to​ ​improve​ ​your​ ​love​ ​life​ ​as​ ​suggested​ ​by​ ​Korean​ ​Dramas.​ ​Be
androgynous,​ ​eat​ ​a​ ​lot,​ ​find​ ​a​ ​rich​ ​guy​ ​that​ ​spoils​ ​you,​ ​find​ ​a​ ​secure​ ​male​ ​as​ ​a​ ​lover,​ ​add​ ​drama​ ​to​ ​your
relationship​ ​through​ ​love​ ​triangles,​ ​plan​ ​a​ ​date​ ​under​ ​the​ ​rain,​ ​keep​ ​your​ ​guy​ ​bestfriend​ ​at​ ​bay,​ ​get​ ​drunk,
and​ ​love​ ​your​ ​enemy.

R:​ ​Kidding​ ​aside,​ ​media​ ​set​ ​unrealistic​ ​expectations​ ​for​ ​everybody.​ ​Although​ ​it​ ​is​ ​said​ ​to​ ​be​ ​a​ ​reflection​ ​of
reality,​ ​culture,​ ​and​ ​ratings​ ​get​ ​in​ ​the​ ​way.​ ​Love,​ ​on​ ​the​ ​other​ ​hand,​ ​knows​ ​no​ ​boundaries.​ ​Love​ ​is​ ​not
universal​ ​and​ ​it​ ​is​ ​constructed​ ​by​ ​the​ ​society​ ​we​ ​live​ ​in.​ ​At​ ​the​ ​end​ ​of​ ​the​ ​day,​ ​it​ ​is​ ​our​ ​choice.

Both:​ ​So​ ​the​ ​question​ ​remains,​ ​would​ ​you​ ​dare​ ​to​ ​love​ ​the​ ​Korean​ ​drama​ ​way?​ ​This​ ​was​ ​Chinto​ ​ang
pipiliin​ ​mo~​ ​Thank​ ​you​ ​and​ ​good​ ​night!

Sources​ ​(Not​ ​in​ ​alphabetical​ ​order):

-https://www.verywell.com/theories-of-love-2795341
-https://www.southuniversity.edu/whoweare/newsroom/blog/the-psychology-behind-love-and-romance-7
0700
-https://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html
-http://ffctexas.com/maslows-hierarchy-needs-love-belonging/
-https://self-help-self-improvement.knoji.com/how-to-attain-your-love-and-belonging-needs/
-https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-highly-romantic-marriage/201605/is-it-love-or-desire
-Sternberg,​ ​Robert​ ​J.​ ​(2007).​ ​"Triangulating​ ​Love".​ ​In​ ​Oord,​ ​T.​ ​J.​ ​The​ ​Altruism​ ​Reader:​ ​Selections​ ​from
Writings​ ​on​ ​Love,​ ​Religion,​ ​and​ ​Science.​ ​West​ ​Conshohocken,​ ​PA:​ ​Templeton​ ​Foundation.​ ​p.​ ​332.​ ​ISBN
9781599471273.
-Rothwell,​ ​J.​ ​Dan.​ ​In​ ​the​ ​Company​ ​of​ ​Others.​ ​Oxford​ ​University​ ​Press.
-http://www.sparknotes.com/psychology/psych101/socialpsychology/section6.rhtml
-https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3907771/
-Jaeggi​ ​A.​ ​V,​ ​Van​ ​Schaik​ ​C.​ ​P.​ ​(2011).​ ​The​ ​evolution​ ​of​ ​food​ ​sharing​ ​in​ ​primates.​ ​Behav.​ ​Ecol.​ ​Sociobiol.
65​ ​2125–2140​ ​10.1007/s00265-011-1221-3
-https://www.soompi.com/2015/12/15/10-overused-k-drama-plots-we-love-to-hate/
-https://www.theodysseyonline.com/14-korean-drama-cliches