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Modern Text

Enter THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, and PHILOSTRATE, with others THESEUS Now, fair Hippolyta, our nuptial hour Draws on apace. Four happy days bring in Another moon. But oh, methinks how slow This old moon wanes! She lingers my desires, Like to a stepdame or a dowager Long withering out a young mans revenue. HIPPOLYTA Four days will quickly steep themselves in night. 10 Four nights will quickly dream away the time. And then the moon, like to a silver bow New bent in heaven, shall behold the night Of our solemnities. THESEUS Go, Philostrate, Stir up the Athenian youth to merriments.

THESEUS and HIPPOLYTA enter withPHILOSTRATE and others. THESEUS Our wedding day is almost here, my beautiful Hippolyta. Well be getting married in four days, on the day of the new moon. But it seems to me that the days are passing too slowlythe old moon is taking too long to fade away! That old, slow moon is keeping me from getting what I want, just like an old widow makes her stepson wait to get his inheritance.

HIPPOLYTA No, youll see, four days will quickly turn into four nights. And since we dream at night, time passes quickly then. Finally the new moon, curved like a silver bow in the sky, will look down on our wedding celebration.

THESEUS Go, Philostrate, get the young people of Athens ready to celebrate and have a good time. Sadness is only appropriate for funerals. We dont want it at

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Awake the pert and nimble spirit of mirth. Turn melancholy forth to funerals. The pale companion is not for our pomp. Exit PHILOSTRATE Hippolyta, I wooed thee with my sword And won thy love doing thee injuries. But I will wed thee in another key, With pomp, with triumph, and with reveling. Enter EGEUS and his daughter HERMIA, andLYSANDER and DEMETRIUS EGEUS

our festivities.

PHILOSTRATE exits. Hippolyta, I wooed you with violence, using my sword, and got you to fall in love with me by injuring you. But Ill marry you under different circumstanceswith extravagant festivals, public festivities, and celebration.

EGEUS enters with his daughter HERMIA, andLYSANDER and DEMETRIUS. EGEUS Long live Theseus, our famous and respected duke!

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Happy be Theseus, our renownd duke. Modern Text THESEUS

Original Text

THESEUS Thanks, good Egeus. Whats new with you? EGEUS Im here, full of anger, to complain about my daughter Hermia.Step forward, Demetrius.My lord, this man, Demetrius, has my permission to marry her.Step forward, Lysander.But this other man, Lysander, has cast a magic spell over my childs heart.You, you, Lysander, youve given her

Thanks, good Egeus. Whats the news with thee? EGEUS Full of vexation come I with complaint 25 Against my child, my daughter Hermia. Stand forth, Demetrius.My noble lord, 30 This man hath my consent to

marry her. Stand forth, Lysander.And my gracious duke, This man hath bewitched the bosom of my child. Thou, thou, Lysander, thou hast given her rhymes, And interchanged love tokens with my child. 45 Thou hast by moonlight at her window sung With feigning voice verses of feigning love, And stol'n the impression of her fantasy With bracelets of thy hair, rings, gauds, conceits, Knacks, trifles, nosegays, sweetmeatsmessengers Of strong prevailment in unhardened youth. With cunning hast thou filched my daughters heart, Turned her obedience (which is due to me) To stubborn harshness.And, my gracious duke, Be it so she will not here before your grace Consent to marry with Demetrius, I beg the ancient privilege of

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poems, and exchanged tokens of love with my daughter. Youve pretended to be in love with her, singing fake love songs softly at her window by moonlight, and youve captured her imagination by giving her locks of your hair, rings, toys, trinkets, knickknacks, little presents, flowers, and candiesthings that can really influence an impressionable young person. Youve connived to steal my daughters heart, making her stubborn and harsh instead of obedient (like she should be). And, my gracious duke, if she wont agree to marry Demetrius right now, I ask you to let me exercise the right that all fathers have in Athens. Since she belongs to me, I can do what I want with heras the law says: I can either make her marry Demetriusor have her killed.

Athens. As she is mine, I may dispose of her Which shall be either to this gentleman Or to her deathaccording to our law Immediately provided in that case. THESEUS What say you, Hermia? Be advised, fair maid: 50 To you your father should be as a god, One that composed your beauties, yea, and one To whom you are but as a form in wax, By him imprinted and within his power To leave the figure or disfigure it. Demetrius is a worthy gentleman. HERMIA So is Lysander. HERMIA So is Lysander. THESEUS In himself he is. 55 But in this kind, wanting your fathers voice, THESEUS Youre right, Lysanders admirable too. But since your father doesnt want him to marry you, you have to consider THESEUS What do you have to say for yourself, Hermia? Think carefully, pretty girl. You should think of your father as a god, since hes the one who gave you your beauty. To him, youre like a figure that hes sculpted out of wax, and he has the power to keep that figure intact or to disfigure it. Demetrius is an admirable man.

The other must be held the worthier. HERMIA I would my father looked but with my eyes. THESEUS Rather your eyes must with his judgment look. HERMIA I do entreat your grace to pardon me. I know not by what power I am made bold Nor how it may concern my modesty In such a presence here to plead my thoughts, But I beseech your grace that I may know The worst that may befall me in this case, If I refuse to wed Demetrius. THESEUS 65 Either to die the death or to abjure Forever the society of men. 70 Therefore, fair Hermia, question your desires.

Demetrius to be the better man.

HERMIA I wish my father could see them with my eyes. THESEUS No, you must see them as your father sees them. HERMIA Your grace, please forgive me. I dont know what makes me think I can say this, and I dont know if speaking my mind to such a powerful and noble person as yourself will damage my reputation for modesty. But please, tell me the worst thing that could happen to me if I refuse to marry Demetrius.

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THESEUS Youll either be executed or youll never see another man again. So think carefully about what you want, beautiful Hermia. Consider how young you are, and question your feelings. Then decide whether you could stand to be a

Know of your youth. Examine well your blood 75 Whether, if you yield not to your fathers choice, You can endure the livery of a nun, For aye to be in shady cloister mewed, To live a barren sister all your life, Chanting faint hymns to the cold, fruitless moon. Thrice-blessd they that master so their blood To undergo such maiden pilgrimage. But earthlier happy is the rose distilled Than that which, withering on the virgin thorn, Grows, lives, and dies in single blessedness. HERMIA So will I grow, so live, so die, my lord, Ere I will yield my virgin patent up Unto his lordship, whose unwishd yoke My soul consents not to give sovereignty. HERMIA Id rather wither away than give up my virginity to someone I dont love.

nun, wearing a priestesss habit and caged up in a cloister forever, living your entire life without a husband or children, weakly chanting hymns to the cold and virginal goddess of the moon. People who can restrain their passions and stay virgins forever are holy. But although a virgin priestess might be rewarded in heaven, a married woman is happier on Earth. A married woman is like a rose who is picked and made into a beautiful perfume, while a priestess just withers away on the stem.

THESEUS Take time to pause, and by the next new moon The sealing day betwixt my love and me For everlasting bond of fellowship Upon that day either prepare to die For disobedience to your fathers will, Or else to wed Demetrius, as he would, Or on Dianas altar to protest For aye austerity and single life. DEMETRIUS Relent, sweet HermiaAnd, Lysander, yield Thy crazd title to my certain right. LYSANDER You have her fathers love, Demetrius. Let me have Hermias. Do you marry him. EGEUS 95 Scornful Lysander, true, he hath my love, And what is mine my love shall

THESEUS Take some time to think about this. By the time of the next new moonthe day when Hippolyta and I will be marriedbe ready either to be executed for disobeying your father, to marry Demetrius as your father wishes, or to take a vow to spend the rest of your life as a virgin priestess of the moon goddess.

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DEMETRIUS Please give in, sweet Hermia. And Lysander, stop acting like shes yours. Ive got more of a right to her than you do.

LYSANDER Her father loves you, Demetrius. So why dont you marry him and let me have Hermia?

EGEUS Its true, rude Lysander, I do love him. Thats why Im giving him my daughter. Shes mine, and Im

render him. And she is mine, and all my right of her I do estate unto Demetrius. LYSANDER 100 (to THESEUS) I am, my lord, as well derived as he, As well possessed. My love is more than his. 105 My fortunes every way as fairly ranked, (If not with vantage) as Demetrius'. 110 Andwhich is more than all these boasts can be I am beloved of beauteous Hermia. Why should not I then prosecute my right? Demetrius, Ill avouch it to his head, Made love to Nedars daughter, Helena, And won her soul. And she, sweet lady, dotes, Devoutly dotes, dotes in idolatry Upon this spotted and inconstant man. THESEUS

giving her to Demetrius.

LYSANDER (to THESEUS) My lord, Im just as noble and rich as he is. I love Hermia more than he does. My prospects are as good as his, if not better. And beautiful Hermia loves mewhich is more important than all those other things Im bragging about. Why shouldnt I be able to marry her? Demetrius and Ill say this to his face courted Nedars daughter, Helena, and made her fall in love with him. That sweet lady, Helena, loves devoutly. She adores this horrible and unfaithful man.

THESEUS

I must confess that I have heard so much 115 And with Demetrius thought to have spoke thereof, But being overfull of self-affairs, My mind did lose it.But, Demetrius, come. And come, Egeus. You shall go with me. 125 I have some private schooling for you both. For you, fair Hermia, look you arm yourself To fit your fancies to your fathers will, Or else the law of Athens yields you up (Which by no means we may extenuate) To death, or to a vow of single life. Come, my Hippolyta. What cheer, my love? Demetrius and Egeus, go along. I must employ you in some business Against our nuptial and confer with you Of something nearly that concerns yourselves.

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I have to admit Ive heard something about that, and meant to ask Demetrius about it, but I was too busy with personal matters and it slipped my mind. Anyway, Demetrius and Egeus, both of you, come with me. I want to say a few things to you in private.As for you, beautiful Hermia, get ready to do what your father wants, because otherwise the law says that you must die or become a nun, and theres nothing I can do about that.Come with me, Hippolyta. How are you, my love? Demetrius and Egeus, come with us. I want you to do some things for our wedding, and I also want to discuss something that concerns you both.

EGEUS With duty and desire we follow you.

EGEUS Were following you not only because it is our duty, but also because we want to. They all exit except LYSANDER and HERMIA. LYSANDER Whats going on, my love? Why are you so pale? Why have your rosy cheeks faded so quickly?

Exeunt. Manent LYSANDER and HERMIA LYSANDER How now, my love? Why is your cheek so pale? How chance the roses there do fade so fast? HERMIA 130 Belike for want of rain, which I could well Beteem them from the tempest of my eyes. LYSANDER Ay me! For aught that I could ever read, 135 Could ever hear by tale or history, The course of true love never did run smooth. But either it was different in blood HERMIA HERMIA O cross! Too high to be enthralled to low. Oh, what an obstacle that would be! Imagine being too high on the social ladder, and falling in love

HERMIA Probably because my cheeks' roses needed rain, which I could easily give them with all the tears in my eyes.

LYSANDER Oh, honey! Listen, in books they say that true love always faces obstacles. Either the lovers have different social standings

with someone beneath you. LYSANDER Or else misgraffd in respect of years HERMIA O spite! Too old to be engaged to young. LYSANDER Or else it stood upon the choice of friends HERMIA 140 O hell, to choose love by anothers eyes! LYSANDER Or, if there were a sympathy in choice, 145 War, death, or sickness did lay siege to it, Making it momentary as a sound, Swift as a shadow, short as any dream, Brief as the lightning in the collied night; That, in a spleen, unfolds both heaven and Earth, And ere a man hath power to say Behold! The jaws of darkness do devour it LYSANDER Or else they were very different ages HERMIA How awful! Being too old to marry someone young. LYSANDER Or else their guardians and advisors said no HERMIA What hell, to have your love life determined by someone else! LYSANDER Or, even if the lovers are a good match, their love might be ruined by war, death, or sickness, so that the affair only lasts an instant. Their time together might be as fleeting as a shadow or as short as a dream, lasting only as long as it takes a lightning bolt to flash across the sky. Before you can say look, its gone. Thats how intense things like love are quickly destroyed.

up. So quick bright things come to confusion. HERMIA 150 If then true lovers have been ever crossed, It stands as an edict in destiny. 155 Then let us teach our trial patience, Because it is a customary cross, As due to love as thoughts and dreams and sighs, Wishes and tears, poor fancys followers. LYSANDER A good persuasion. Therefore, hear me, Hermia. 160 I have a widow aunt, a dowager Of great revenue, and she hath no child. From Athens is her house remote seven leagues, And she respects me as her only son. There, gentle Hermia, may I marry thee. And to that place the sharp Athenian law Cannot pursue us. If thou lovest LYSANDER Thats the right attitude. So, listen, Hermia. I have an aunt who is a widow, whos very rich and doesnt have any children. She lives about twenty miles from Athens, and she thinks of me as a son. I could marry you there, gentle Hermia, where the strict laws of Athens cant touch us. So heres the plan. If you love me, sneak out of your fathers house tomorrow night and meet me in the forest a few miles outside of town. HERMIA If true lovers are always thwarted, then it must be a rule of fate. So lets try to be patient as we deal with our problem. Its as normal a part of love as dreams, sighs, wishes, and tears.

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me then, Steal forth thy fathers house tomorrow night. And in the wood, a league without the town You remember the placeI met you there once with Helena to celebrate May Day.Ill wait for you there.

Where I did meet thee once with Helena To do observance to a morn of May There will I stay for thee.

HERMIA My good Lysander! 170 I swear to thee by Cupids strongest bow, By his best arrow with the golden head, 175 By the simplicity of Venus' doves, By that which knitteth souls and prospers loves, And by that fire which burned the Carthage queen When the false Troyan under sail was seen, By all the vows that ever men have broke (In number more than ever women spoke), In that same place thou hast

HERMIA Oh, Lysander, I swear Ill be there tomorrow. I swear by Cupids strongest bow and his best goldtipped arrow, by the Goddess of Loves innocent doves, by everything that ties lovers together, by the bonfire where Queen Dido burned herself to death when her lover Aeneas jilted her, and by all the promises that men have broken (and men have broken more promises than women have ever made). I give you my word, I will meet you at that spot tomorrow.

appointed me, Tomorrow truly will I meet with thee. LYSANDER Keep promise, love. Look, here comes Helena. Enter HELENA HERMIA 180 Godspeed, fair Helena! Whither away? HELENA Call you me fair? That fair again unsay. 185 Demetrius loves your fair. O happy fair! Your eyes are lodestars, and your tongues sweet air 190 More tunable than lark to shepherds ear When wheat is green, when hawthorn buds appear. Sickness is catching. Oh, were favor so, Yours would I catch, fair Hermia, ere I go. My ear should catch your voice. My eye, your eye. My tongue should catch your LYSANDER Keep your promise, my love. Look, here comes Helena. HELENA enters. HERMIA Hello, beautiful Helena! Where are you going? HELENA Did you just call me beautiful? Take it back. Youre the beautiful one as far as Demetrius is concerned. Oh, youre so lucky! Your eyes are like stars, and your voice is more musical than a larks song is to a shepherd in the springtime. Sickness is contagiousI wish beauty were contagious too! I would catch your good looks before I left. My ear would be infected by your voice, my eye by your eye, and my tongue would come down with a bad case of your melodious speech. If the world were mine, Id give it all upeverything except Demetriusto be you.

tongues sweet melody. Were the world mine, Demetrius being bated, The rest Id give to be to you translated. Oh, teach me how you look the way you do, and which tricks you used to make Demetrius fall in love with you.

O, teach me how you look and with what art You sway the motion of Demetrius' heart.

HERMIA I frown upon him, yet he loves me still. HELENA 195 Oh, that your frowns would teach my smiles such skill! HERMIA I give him curses, yet he gives me love. HELENA Oh, that my prayers could such affection move! HERMIA The more I hate, the more he follows me. HELENA The more I love, the more he

HERMIA I frown at him, but he still loves me. HELENA Oh, if only my smiles could inspire love as effectively as your frowns! HERMIA I curse him, but he loves me.

HELENA If only my prayers could inspire that kind of affection! HERMIA The more I hate him, the more he follows me around. HELENA The more I love him, the more he

hateth me. HERMIA 200 His folly, Helena, is no fault of mine. HELENA None, but your beauty. Would that fault were mine! HERMIA Take comfort. He no more shall see my face. 205 Lysander and myself will fly this place. Before the time I did Lysander see Seemed Athens as a paradise to me. Oh, then, what graces in my love do dwell, That he hath turned a heaven unto a hell! LYSANDER Helen, to you our minds we will unfold. Tomorrow night when Phoebe doth behold Her silver visage in the watery glass, Decking with liquid pearl the bladed grass

hates me. HERMIA Its not my fault he acts like that, Helena. HELENA Thats true, its your beautys fault. I wish I had a fault like that! HERMIA Dont worry. He wont see my face ever again. Lysander and I are running away from here. Before I saw Lysander, Athens seemed like paradise to me. But Lysanders so attractive that hes turned heaven into hell!

LYSANDER Helena, well tell you about our secret plan. Tomorrow night, when the moon shines on the water and decorates the grass with tiny beads of pearly light (the time of night that always hides runaway lovers), we plan to sneak out of Athens.

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(A time that lovers' flights doth still conceal), Through Athens' gates have we devised to steal. HERMIA 215 (to HELENA) And in the wood where often you and I Upon faint primrose beds were wont to lie, Emptying our bosoms of their counsel sweet, There my Lysander and myself shall meet. 220 And thence from Athens turn away our eyes To seek new friends and stranger companies. Farewell, sweet playfellow. Pray thou for us. And good luck grant thee thy Demetrius! Keep word, Lysander. We must starve our sight From lovers' food till morrow deep midnight. LYSANDER I will, my Hermia. Exit HERMIA LYSANDER I will, my Hermia. HERMIA exits. From then on well turn our backs on Athens. Well look for new friends and keep the company of strangers. Goodbye, old friend. Pray for us, and I hope you win over Demetrius!Keep your promise, Lysander. We need to stay away from each other until midnight tomorrow. HERMIA (to HELENA) In the woods where you and I used to lounge around on the pale primroses, telling each other sweet secretsthats where Lysander and I will meet.

Helena, adieu. 225 As you on him, Demetrius dote on you! Exit LYSANDER HELENA How happy some o'er other some can be! 230 Through Athens I am thought as fair as she. But what of that? Demetrius thinks not so. 235 He will not know what all but he do know. And as he errs, doting on Hermias eyes, 240 So I, admiring of his qualities. Things base and vile, holding no quantity, Love can transpose to form and dignity. Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind. And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. Nor hath Loves mind of any judgment taste Wings and no eyes figure unheedy haste. And therefore is Love said to be a

Goodbye, Helena. I hope Demetrius comes to love you as much as you love him!

LYSANDER exits. HELENA Its amazing how much happier some people are than others! People throughout Athens think Im as beautiful as Hermia. But so what? Demetrius doesnt think so, and thats all that matters. He refuses to admit what everyone else knows. But even though hes making a mistake by obsessing over Hermia so much, Im also making a mistake, since I obsess over him. Love can make worthless things beautiful. When were in love, we dont see with our eyes but with our minds. Thats why paintings of Cupid, the god of love, always show him as blind. And love doesnt have good judgment eitherCupid, has wings and no eyes, so hes bound to be reckless and hasty. Thats why they say love is a child. because it makes such bad choices. Just as boys like to play games by telling lies, Cupid breaks his promises all the time. Before Demetrius ever saw Hermia, he showered me with promises and swore hed be mine forever.

child, Because in choice he is so oft beguiled. As waggish boys in game themselves forswear, So the boy Love is perjured everywhere. For ere Demetrius looked on Hermias eyne, He hailed down oaths that he was only mine. And when this hail some heat from Hermia felt, So he dissolved, and showers of oaths did melt. 250 I will go tell him of fair Hermias flight. Then to the wood will he tomorrow night Pursue her. And for this intelligence If I have thanks, it is a dear expense. But herein mean I to enrich my pain, To have his sight thither and back again. Exit QUINCE, the carpenter, enters with SNUG, the HERMIA exits. But when he got all hot and bothered over Hermia, his promises melted away. Ill go tell Demetrius that Hermia is running away tomorrow night. Hell run after her. If hes grateful to me for this information, itll be worth my pain in helping him pursue my rival Hermia. At least Ill get to see him when he goes, and then again when he comes back.

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Enter QUINCE the carpenter,

and SNUG the joiner, and BOTTOM the weaver, and FLUTE the bellows-mender, and SNOUT the tinker, and STARVELINGthe tailor

cabinetmaker; BOTTOM, the weaver; FLUTE, the bellowsrepairman; SNOUT, the handyman; andSTARVELING, the tailor. QUINCE Is all our company here? BOTTOM You were best to call them generally, man by man, according to the scrip. QUINCE Is everyone here? BOTTOM You should call their names generally, one person at a time, in the order in which their names appear on this piece of paper. QUINCE This is a list of the names of all the men in Athens who are good enough to act in the play were going to perform for the duke and duchess on their wedding night. BOTTOM First, Peter Quince, tell us what the play is about, then read the names of the actors, and then shut up. QUINCE All right. Our play is called A Very Tragic Comedy About the Horrible Deaths of Pyramus and Thisbe. BOTTOM

QUINCE Here is the scroll of every mans name which is thought fit, through all Athens, to play in our interlude before the duke and the duchess, on his wedding day at night.

BOTTOM First, good Peter Quince, say what the play treats on, then read the names of the actors, and so grow to a point. QUINCE 5 Marry, our play is The most lamentable comedy and most cruel death of Pyramus and Thisbe. BOTTOM

A very good piece of work, I assure you, and a merry.Now, good Peter Quince, call forth your actors by the scroll.Masters, spread yourselves. QUINCE Answer as I call you.Nick Bottom, the weaver? BOTTOM Ready. Name what part I am for and proceed. QUINCE You, Nick Bottom, are set down for Pyramus. BOTTOM 10 What is Pyramus? A lover or a tyrant? QUINCE A lover that kills himself, most gallant, for love. BOTTOM That will ask some tears in the true performing of it. If I do it, let the audience look to their eyes. I will move storms. I will condole in some measure.To the rest. Yet my chief humor is for a tyrant. I could play Ercles rarely, or a part to tear a cat in to make all split. The raging rocks

Let me tell you, its a great piece of work, and veryfunny. Now, Peter Quince, call the names of the actors on the list. Men, gather around him. QUINCE Answer when I call your name. Nick Bottom, the weaver? BOTTOM Here. Tell me which part Im going to play, then go on. QUINCE You, Nick Bottom, have been cast as Pyramus. BOTTOM Whats Pyramus? A lover or a tyrant? QUINCE A lover who kills himself very nobly for love. BOTTOM Ill have to cry to make my performance believable. And as soon as I start crying, oh boy, the audience had better watch out, because theyll start crying too. Ill make tears pour out of their eyes like rainstorms. Ill moan very believably.Name the other actors.But Im really in the mood to play a tyrant. I

And shivering shocks Shall break the locks Of prison gates. And Phoebus' car Shall shine from far And make and mar The foolish Fates. This was lofty!Now name the rest of the players.This is Ercles' vein, a tyrants vein. A lover is more condoling.

could do a great job with Hercules, or any other part that requires ranting and raving. I would rant and rave really well. Like this, listen. The raging rocks nd shivering shocks Will break the locks Of prison gates. And the sun-gods car Will shine from far Away, and make and mar Foolish fate. Oh, that was truly inspired! Now tell us who the other actors are.By the way, my performance just now was in the style of Hercules, the tyrant style. A lover would have to be weepier, of course.

QUINCE Francis Flute, the bellowsmender? FLUTE 15 Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE Flute, you must take Thisbe on you.

QUINCE Francis Flute, the bellowsrepairman? FLUTE Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE Flute, youll be playing the role of Thisbe.

FLUTE What is Thisbe? A wandering knight?

FLUTE Whos Thisbe? A knight on a quest? QUINCE It is the lady that Pyramus must love. FLUTE Nay, faith, let me not play a woman. I have a beard coming. QUINCE QUINCE Thisbe is the lady Pyramus is in love with. FLUTE No, come on, dont make me play a woman. Im growing a beard. QUINCE That doesnt matter. Youll wear a mask, and you can make your voice as high as you want to. BOTTOM In that case, if I can wear a mask, let me play Thisbe too! Ill be Pyramus first: Thisne, Thisne! And then in falsetto: Ah, Pyramus, my dear lover! Im your dear Thisbe, your dear lady! QUINCE No, no. Bottom, youre Pyramus.And Flute, youre Thisbe. BOTTOM All right. Go on. QUINCE Robin Starveling, the tailor?

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Thats all one. You shall play it in a mask, and you may speak as small as you will. BOTTOM An I may hide my face, let me play Thisbe too! Ill speak in a monstrous little voice: Thisne, Thisne!Ah, Pyramus, my lover dear, thy Thisbe dear and lady dear! QUINCE No, no. You must play Pyramus. And Flute, you Thisbe.

BOTTOM Well, proceed. QUINCE Robin Starveling, the tailor?

STARVELING 25 Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE Robin Starveling, you must play Thisbes mother.Tom Snout, the tinker? SNOUT Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE You, Pyramus' father.Myself, Thisbes father.Snug the joiner, you, the lions part.And I hope here is a play fitted.

STARVELING Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE Robin Starveling, youre going to play Thisbes mother.Tom Snout, the handyman. SNOUT Here, Peter Quince. QUINCE Youll be Pyramuss fatherIll play Thisbes father myselfSnug, the cabinetmaker, youll play the part of the lion.So thats everyone. I hope this play is well cast now.

SNUG Have you the lions part written? Pray you, if it be, give it me, for I am slow of study.

SNUG Do you have the lions part written down? If you do, please give it to me, because I need to start learning the lines. It takes me a long time to learn things. QUINCE QUINCE You can improvise the whole thing. Its just roaring. BOTTOM Let me play the lion too. Ill roar so well that itll be an inspiration to anyone who hears me. Ill roar so well that the duke will say, Let him roar again. Let him roar again.

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You may do it extempore, for it is nothing but roaring. BOTTOM Let me play the lion too. I will roar, that I will do any mans heart good to hear me. I will roar, that I will make the duke say, Let him roar again. Let him roar

again. QUINCE An you should do it too terribly, you would fright the duchess and the ladies, that they would shriek. And that were enough to hang us all. ALL That would hang us, every mothers son. BOTTOM I grant you, friends, if you should fright the ladies out of their wits, they would have no more discretion but to hang us. But I will aggravate my voice so that I will roar you as gently as any sucking dove. I will roar you an twere any nightingale. QUINCE If you roar too ferociously, youll scare the duchess and the other ladies and make them scream. And that would get us all executed.

ALL Yeah, that would get every single one of us executed. BOTTOM Well, my friends, youve got to admit that if you scare the living daylights out of the ladies, theyd have no choice but to execute us. But Ill soften my voiceyou know, aggravate it, so to speakso that Ill roar as gently as a baby dove. Ill roar like a sweet, peaceful nightingale. QUINCE You cant play any part except Pyramus. Because Pyramus is a good-looking man, the most handsome man that you could find on a summers day, a lovely gentlemanly man. So youre the only one who could play Pyramus. BOTTOM Well then, Ill do it. What kind of beard should I wear for the part?

QUINCE 35 You can play no part but Pyramus. For Pyramus is a sweetfaced man, a proper man as one shall see in a summers day, a most lovely, gentlemanlike man. Therefore you must needs play Pyramus. BOTTOM Well, I will undertake it. What beard were I best to play it in?

QUINCE Why, what you will. BOTTOM BOTTOM I will discharge it in either your straw-color beard, your orangetawny beard, your purple-ingrain beard, or your French crown-color beard, your perfect yellow. Ill play the part wearing either a straw-colored beard, or a sandy beard, or a red beard, or one of those bright yellow beards thats the color of a French coin.

QUINCE Whatever kind you want, I guess.

QUINCE Some of your French crowns have no hair at all, and then you will play barefaced.But masters, here are your parts. And I am to entreat you, request you, and desire you to con them by tomorrow night and meet me in the palace wood, a mile without the town, by moonlight. There will we rehearse, for if we meet in the city we shall be dogged with company, and our devices known. In the meantime I will draw a bill of properties such as our play wants. I pray you, fail me not.

QUINCE Some French people dont have beards at all, because syphilis has made all their hair fall out, so you might have to play the part cleanshaven.But gentlemen, here are your scripts, and I beg you to please learn them by tomorrow night. Meet me in the dukes forest a mile outside of town. Its best to rehearse there, because if we do it here in the city, well be bothered by crowds of people and everyone will know the plot of our play. Meanwhile, Ill make a list of props that well need for the play. Now make sure you show up, all of you. Dont leave me in the lurch. BOTTOM Well be there, and there well rehearse courageously and wonderfully, truly obscenely. Work hard, know your lines. Goodbye.

BOTTOM 40 We will meet, and there we may rehearse most obscenely and courageously. Take pains. Be perfect. Adieu.

QUINCE At the dukes oak we meet.

QUINCE Well meet at the giant oak tree in the dukes forest. BOTTOM Got it? Be there, or dont show your face again. They all exit.

BOTTOM Enough. Hold, or cut bowstrings.

Exeunt A FAIRY and ROBIN GOODFELLOW (a puck or mischievous spirit) meet onstage.

Enter a FAIRY at one side and ROBIN (ROBIN GOODFELLOW) at another

ROBIN How now, spirit? Whither wander you? FAIRY Over hill, over dale, Thorough bush, thorough brier, Over park, over pale, Thorough flood, thorough fire. I do wander everywhere Swifter than the moons sphere. And I serve the fairy queen To dew her orbs upon the green. The cowslips tall her pensioners be. In their gold coats spots you see.

ROBIN Hello, spirit! Where are you going? FAIRY I go over hills and valleys, through bushes and thorns, over parks and fenced-in spaces, through water and fire. I wander everywhere faster than the moon revolves around the Earth. I work for Titania, the Fairy Queen, and organize fairy dances for her in the grass. The cowslip flowers are her bodyguards. Youll see that their petals have spots on themthose are rubies, fairy gifts. Their sweet smells come from those little freckles. Now I have to go find some dewdrops and hang a pearl earring on every cowslip

Those be rubies, fairy favors. In those freckles live their savors. I must go seek some dewdrops here And hang a pearl in every cowslips ear. Farewell, thou lob of spirits. Ill be gone. Our queen and all our elves come here anon. ROBIN 5 The king doth keep his revels here tonight. Take heed the queen come not within his sight. 10 For Oberon is passing fell and wrath Because that she, as her attendant hath A lovely boy stolen from an Indian king. She never had so sweet a changeling. And jealous Oberon would have the child Knight of his train, to trace the forests wild. But she perforce withholds the lovd boy, Crowns him with flowers, and

flower. Goodbye, you dumb old spirit. Ive got to go. The queen and her elves will be here soon.

ROBIN The kings having a party here tonight. Just make sure the queen doesnt come anywhere near him, because King Oberon is extremely angry. Hes furious because she stole an adorable boy from an Indian king. Shes never kidnapped such a darling human child before, and Oberons jealous. He wants the child for himself, to accompany him on his wanderings through the wild forests. But the queen refuses to hand the boy over to Oberon. Instead, she puts flowers in the boys hair and makes a fuss over him.

makes him all her joy. And now they never meet in grove or green, By fountain clear or spangled starlight sheen. But they do square, that all their elves for fear Creep into acorn cups and hide them there. FAIRY Either I mistake your shape and making quite, Or else you are that shrewd and knavish sprite Called Robin Goodfellow. Are not you he That frights the maidens of the villagery, Skim milk, and sometimes labor in the quern And bootless make the breathless housewife churn, And sometime make the drink to bear no barm, Mislead night-wanderers, laughing at their harm? Those that Hobgoblin call you, and sweet Puck, You do their work, and they shall have good luck. And now Oberon and Titania refuse to speak to each other, or meet each other anywhereneither in the forest nor on the plain, nor by the river nor under the stars. They always argue, and the little fairies get so frightened that they hide in acorn cups and wont come out. FAIRY Unless Im mistaken, youre that mischievous and naughty spirit named Robin Goodfellow. Arent you the one who goes around scaring the maidens in the village, stealing the cream from the top of the milk, screwing up the flour mills, and frustrating housewives by keeping their milk from turning into butter? Arent you the one who keeps beer from foaming up as it should, and causes people to get lost at night, while you laugh at them? Some people call you Hobgoblin and sweet Puck, and youre nice to them. You do their work for them and give them good luck. Thats you, right?

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Are not you he? ROBIN Thou speakst aright. 30 I am that merry wanderer of the night. I jest to Oberon and make him smile 35 When I a fat and bean-fed horse beguile, Neighing in likeness of a filly foal. 40 And sometime lurk I in a gossips bowl In very likeness of a roasted crab, And when she drinks, against her lips I bob And on her withered dewlap pour the ale. The wisest aunt telling the saddest tale Sometime for three-foot stool mistaketh me. Then slip I from her bum, down topples she, And Tailor! cries, and falls into a cough, And then the whole quire hold their hips and laugh, And waxen in their mirth, and neeze, and swear A merrier hour was never wasted ROBIN What you say is true. Thats me youre talking about, the playful wanderer of the night. I tell jokes to Oberon and make him smile. Ill trick a fat, well-fed horse into thinking that Im a young female horse. Sometimes I hide at the bottom of an old womans drink disguised as an apple. When she takes a sip, I bob up against her lips and make her spill the drink all over her withered old neck. Sometimes a wise old woman with a sad story to tell tries to sit down on me, thinking Im a threelegged stool. But I slip from underneath her and she falls down, crying, Ow, my butt! and starts coughing, and then everyone laughs and has fun. But step aside, fairy! Here comes Oberon.

there. But, room, fairy! Here comes Oberon. FAIRY 45 And here my mistress. Would that he were gone! OBERON, the Fairy King, and his followers enter. On the opposite side of the stage, TITANIA, the Fairy Queen, and her followers enter. OBERON Ill met by moonlight, proud Titania. TITANIA What, jealous Oberon?Fairies, skip hence. I have forsworn his bed and company. OBERON Tarry, rash wanton. Am not I thy lord? OBERON How not nice to see you, Titania. FAIRY And heres my mistress, Titania. I wish hed go away!

Enter OBERON, the King of Fairies, at one side with his train, and TITANIA, the Queen, at the other, with hers

TITANIA What, are you jealous, Oberon?Fairies, lets get out of here. Ive sworn Ill never sleep with him or talk to him again. OBERON Wait just a minute, you brazen hussy. Arent you supposed to obey me, your lord and husband? TITANIA If youre my lord and husband, I must be your lady and wife, so youre supposed to be faithful to me. But I know for a fact that you snuck away from Fairyland

TITANIA 50 Then I must be thy lady. But I know When thou hast stolen away from Fairyland,

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And in the shape of Corin sat all day, Playing on pipes of corn and versing love To amorous Phillida. Why art thou here, Come from the farthest step of India? But that, forsooth, the bouncing Amazon, Your buskined mistress and your warrior love, To Theseus must be wedded, and you come To give their bed joy and prosperity. OBERON 60 How canst thou thus for shame, Titania, Knowing I know thy love to Theseus? Glance at my credit with Hippolyta, Didst thou not lead him through the glimmering night From Perigouna, whom he ravishd? And make him with fair gles break his faith, With Ariadne and Antiopa? TITANIA

disguised as a shepherd, and spent all day playing straw pipes and singing love poems to your new girlfriend. The only reason you left India was to come here and see that butch Amazon Hippolyta. She was your bootwearing mistress and your warrior lover, and now that shes getting married to Theseus, youve come to celebrate their marriage.

OBERON How can you stand there shamelessly talking about me and Hippolyta, when you know that I know about your love for Theseus? Werent you the one who made him desert Perigouna in the middle of the night, right after hed raped her? And werent you the one who made him cheat on all of his other girlfriends, like Aegles, Ariadne, and Antiopa?

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These are the forgeries of jealousy. 70 And never, since the middle summers spring, Met we on hill, in dale, forest, or mead, 75 By pavd fountain, or by rushy brook, Or in the beachd margent of the sea, 80 To dance our ringlets to the whistling wind, But with thy brawls thou hast disturbed our sport. 85 Therefore the winds, piping to us in vain, As in revenge, have sucked up from the sea 90 Contagious fogs, which falling in the land Have every pelting river made so proud That they have overborne their continents. The ox hath therefore stretched his yoke in vain, The ploughman lost his sweat, and the green corn Hath rotted ere his youth attained a beard. The fold stands empty in the

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These are nothing but jealous lies. Since the beginning of midsummer, my fairies and I havent been able to meet anywhere to do our dances in the wind without being disturbed by you and your arguments. We havent been able to meet on a hill or in a valley, in the forest or a meadow, by a pebbly fountain or a rushing stream, or on the beach by the ocean without you disturbing us. And because you interrupt us so that we cant dance for them, the winds have made fogs rise up out of the sea and fall down on the rivers so that the rivers flood, just to get revenge on you. So all the work that oxen and farmers have done in plowing the fields has been for nothing, because the unripe grain has rotted before it was ripe. Sheep pens are empty in the middle of the flooded fields, and the crows get fat from eating the dead bodies of infected sheep. All the fields where people usually play games are filled with mud, and you cant even see the elaborate mazes that people create in the grass, because no one walks in them anymore and theyve all grown over. Its not winter here for the human mortals, so theyre not protected by the holy hymns and carols that they sing in winter. So the pale, angry

drownd field, And crows are fatted with the murrain flock. The nine-mens-morris is filled up with mud, And the quaint mazes in the wanton green For lack of tread are undistinguishable. The human mortals want their winter here. No night is now with hymn or carol blessed. Therefore the moon, the governess of floods, Pale in her anger, washes all the air, That rheumatic diseases do abound. And thorough this distemperature we see The seasons alter: hoary-headed frosts Fall in the fresh lap of the crimson rose, And on old Hiems' thin and icy crown An odorous chaplet of sweet summer buds Is, as in mockery, set. The spring, the summer,

moon, who controls the tides, fills the air with diseases. As a consequence of this bad weather and these bad moods the seasons have started to change. Cold frosts spread over the red roses, and the icy winter wears a crown of sweet summer flowers as some sick joke. Spring, summer, fertile autumn and angry winter have all changed places, and now the confused world doesnt know which is which. And this is all because of our argument. We are responsible for this.

The childing autumn, angry winter change Their wonted liveries, and the mazd world, By their increase, now knows not which is which. And this same progeny of evils comes From our debate, from our dissension. We are their parents and original. OBERON Do you amend it then. It lies in you. Why should Titania cross her Oberon? I do but beg a little changeling boy, To be my henchman. TITANIA Set your heart at rest. The Fairyland buys not the child of me. His mother was a votaress of my order, And in the spicd Indian air by night Full often hath she gossiped by TITANIA Get over it. I wont give up this child for all of Fairyland. His mother was one of my worshippers, and we always used to gossip together at night in India, sitting together by the ocean and watching the merchant ships sailing on the ocean. We used to laugh to see the sails fill up with wind so that they looked like they had OBERON Do something about it, then. You have the power to fix it. Why would Titania want to argue with her Oberon? All Im asking for is to have that little human boy as part of my crew.

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my side, 120 And sat with me on Neptunes yellow sands, Marking th' embarkd traders on the flood, When we have laughed to see the sails conceive And grow big-bellied with the wanton wind; Which she, with pretty and with swimming gait Followingher womb then rich with my young squire Would imitate, and sail upon the land To fetch me trifles and return again As from a voyage, rich with merchandise. But she, being mortal, of that boy did die. And for her sake do I rear up her boy, And for her sake I will not part with him. OBERON How long within this wood intend you stay? TITANIA Perchance till after Theseus'

big, pregnant bellies, as if the wind had gotten them pregnant. She would imitate themsince she was already pregnant with the little boy and she would go sailing over the land herself to go get me little presents, and come back carrying gifts like she was a ship coming back from a voyage. But since she was a mortal, she died giving birth to that boy, and for her sake Im raising him and will not give him up.

OBERON How long do you plan to stay here in this forest? TITANIA Maybe until after Theseuss

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wedding day. If you will patiently dance in our round And see our moonlight revels, go with us. If not, shun me, and I will spare your haunts. OBERON Give me that boy and I will go with thee. TITANIA

wedding day. If you behave yourself and join us in our circle dance and moonlight celebrations, then you can come with us. If not, leave me alone, and Ill stay away from your turf.

OBERON Give me that boy and Ill come with you. TITANIA Not for your entire fairy kingdom.Come, fairies, lets go. Were going to have an outand-out brawl if I stay any longer. TITANIA and her FAIRIES exit. OBERON Well, go on your way, then. You wont leave this grove until Ive paid you back for this insult. (toROBIN GOODFELLOW) My dear Puck, come here. You remember the time when I was sitting on a cliff, and I heard a mermaid sitting on a dolphins back sing such a sweet and harmonious song that it calmed the stormy sea and made stars shoot out of the sky so they could hear her better?

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Not for thy fairy kingdom. Fairies, away! We shall chide downright, if I longer stay. Exeunt TITANIA and her train OBERON Well, go thy way. Thou shalt not from this grove

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Till I torment thee for this injury.(to ROBIN GOODFELLOW) My gentle Puck, come hither. Thou rememberest Since once I sat upon a promontory And heard a mermaid on a dolphins back Uttering such dulcet and

harmonious breath That the rude sea grew civil at her song And certain stars shot madly from their spheres To hear the seamaids music? ROBIN I remember. OBERON 140 That very time I saw (but thou couldst not) Flying between the cold moon and the Earth, Cupid all armed. A certain aim he took At a fair vestal thrond by the west, And loosed his love shaft smartly from his bow As it should pierce a hundred thousand hearts. But I might see young Cupids fiery shaft Quenched in the chaste beams of the watery moon, And the imperial votaress passd on, In maiden meditation, fancy-free. Yet marked I where the bolt of ROBIN Yes, I remember. OBERON That same night, I saw Cupid flying from the moon to the earth, with all of his arrows ready. (You couldnt see him, but I could.) He took aim at a beautiful young virgin who was sitting on a throne in the western part of the world, and he shot his arrow of love well enough to have pierced a hundred thousand hearts. But I could see that Cupids fiery arrow was put out by watery, virginal moonbeams, so the royal virgin continued her virginal thoughts without being interrupted by thoughts of love. But I paid attention to where Cupids arrow fell. It fell on a little western flower, which used to be white as milk but now has turned purple from being wounded by the arrow of love. Young girls call it love-inidleness. Bring me that flower. I showed it to you once. If its juice is put on someones

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Cupid fell. It fell upon a little western flower, Before milk-white, now purple with loves wound. And maidens call it love-inidleness. Fetch me that flower. The herb I showed thee once. The juice of it on sleeping eyelids laid Will make or man or woman madly dote Upon the next live creature that it sees. Fetch me this herb, and be thou here again Ere the leviathan can swim a league. ROBIN 160 Ill put a girdle round about the Earth In forty minutes. ROBIN exits. Exit ROBIN OBERON Having once this juice, Ill watch Titania when she is asleep 165

eyelids while theyre asleep, that person will fall in love with the next living creature he or she sees. Bring me this plant, and get back here before the sea monster has time to swim three miles.

ROBIN I could go around the world in forty minutes.

OBERON When I have the juice of that flower, Ill trickle some drops of it on Titanias eyes while shes sleeping. Shell fall madly in love

And drop the liquor of it in her eyes. The next thing then she waking looks upon 170 Be it on lion, bear, or wolf, or bull, On meddling monkey or on busy ape She shall pursue it with the soul of love. And ere I take this charm from of her sight As I can take it with another herb Ill make her render up her page to me. But who comes here? I am invisible. And I will overhear their conference. Enter DEMETRIUS, HELENA following him DEMETRIUS I love thee not, therefore pursue me not. 175 Where is Lysander and fair Hermia? The one Ill stay, the other stayeth me. Thou toldst me they were stol'n unto this wood. And here am I, and wood within this wood, Because I cannot meet my Hermia. Hence, get thee gone, and follow me no more. HELENA 180 You draw me, you hard-hearted

with the first thing she sees when she wakes upeven if its a lion, a bear, a wolf, a bull, a monkey, or an ape. And before I make her normal againI can cure her by treating her with another plantIll make her give me that little boy as my page. But whos that coming this way? Ill make myself invisible and listen to their conversation.

DEMETRIUS enters, followed by HELENA. DEMETRIUS Look, I dont love you, so stop following me around. Where are Lysander and beautiful Hermia? Lysander I want to stop, but Hermia stops my heart from beating. You told me they escaped into this forest. And here I am, going crazy in the middle of the woods because I cant find my Hermia. Go away, get out of here, and stop following me.

HELENA You attract me to you, you cruel

adamant. But yet you draw not iron, for my heart Is true as steel. Leave you your power to draw, And I shall have no power to follow you. DEMETRIUS 185 Do I entice you? Do I speak you fair? Or rather, do I not in plainest truth Tell you I do not, nor I cannot, love you? HELENA And even for that do I love you the more. 190 I am your spaniel. And, Demetrius, The more you beat me, I will fawn on you. 195 Use me but as your spanielspurn me, strike me, Neglect me, lose me. Only give me leave, Unworthy as I am, to follow you. What worser place can I beg in your love And yet a place of high respect with me Than to be usd as you use your dog? DEMETRIUS Tempt not too much the hatred of my

magnet! But you must not attract iron, because my heart is as true as steel. If you let go of your power to attract me, I wont have any power to follow you.

DEMETRIUS Do I ask you to follow me? Do I speak to you kindly? Dont I tell you in the clearest terms that I do not and cannot love you? HELENA Yes, but that makes me love you even more. Im your little dog, Demetrius. The more you beat me, the more Ill love you. Treat me like you would treat a dogkick me, hit me, neglect me, try to lose me. Just let me follow behind you, even though Im not good enough for you. Could I ask for a worse place in your heart than to be treated as you would treat a dog? And yet I would consider it an honor to be your dog.

DEMETRIUS Dont push it. Just looking at

spirit. For I am sick when I do look on thee. HELENA And I am sick when I look not on you.

you makes me sick.

HELENA And I get sick when I cant look at you. DEMETRIUS Youre risking your reputation by leaving the city and stalking someone who doesnt love you. Standing around alone in a deserted area in the middle of the night isnt the best way to protect your virginity.

DEMETRIUS 200 You do impeach your modesty too much, To leave the city and commit yourself Into the hands of one that loves you not, To trust the opportunity of night And the ill counsel of a desert place With the rich worth of your virginity. HELENA 205 Your virtue is my privilege. For that It is not night when I do see your face. Therefore I think I am not in the night. 210 Nor doth this wood lack worlds of company, For you in my respect are all the world. Then how can it be said I am alone When all the world is here to look on me? DEMETRIUS Ill run from thee and hide me in the

HELENA I rely on your virtue to protect me. And because I can see your shining face, it doesnt feel like nighttime to me. This forest doesnt seem deserted when youre here, because you are all the world to me. So how can anyone say Im alone, when the whole world is here to look at me?

DEMETRIUS Ill run away from you and hide in the bushes, and leave you to

brakes, And leave thee to the mercy of wild beasts. HELENA 215 The wildest hath not such a heart as you. Run when you will, the story shall be changed. Apollo flies and Daphne holds the chase. The dove pursues the griffin. The mild hind Makes speed to catch the tiger bootless speed, When cowardice pursues and valor flies. DEMETRIUS 220 I will not stay thy questions. Let me go. Or if thou follow me, do not believe But I shall do thee mischief in the wood.

the mercy of wild animals.

HELENA The wildest animal isnt as cruel as you are. Run whenever you want to. The story of Daphne and Apollo will be changed: the lustful god Apollo runs away from the virginal nymph Daphne who pursues him, the dove chases after the griffin, which is usually its predator, and the gentle deer tries to hunt down the tigerspeed is useless when the cowardly person chases and the brave person runs away. DEMETRIUS Im not sticking around to listen to you any longer. Leave me alone. Or if you follow me, youd better understand that Ill do something bad to you in the forest. HELENA Yes, you already hurt me in the church, in the town, and in the fields. Shame on you, Demetrius! Your behavior is an insult to all women. We cannot fight for love as men can. We should be pursued and courted.

HELENA Ay, in the temple, in the town, the field 225 You do me mischief. Fie, Demetrius! Your wrongs do set a scandal on my sex. We cannot fight for love as men may

do. We should be wooed and were not made to woo. Exit DEMETRIUS Ill follow thee and make a heaven of hell, To die upon the hand I love so well. Exit HELENA OBERON 230 Fare thee well, nymph. Ere he do leave this grove, Thou shalt fly him and he shall seek thy love. Enter ROBIN Hast thou the flower there? Welcome, wanderer. ROBIN Ay, there it is. OBERON I pray thee, give it me. 235 (takes flower from ROBIN) I know a bank where the wild thyme blows, Where oxlips and the nodding violet grows, Quite overcanopied with luscious

We werent made to do the pursuing.

DEMETRIUS exits. Ill follow you and turn this hell Im in into a kind of heaven. It would be heavenly to be killed by someone I love so much. HELENA exits. OBERON Goodbye, nymph. Before he leaves this part of the forest, youll change places: youll be the one running away, and hell be in love with you. ROBIN enters. Do you have the flower? Welcome, traveler. ROBIN Yes, here it is. OBERON Please, give it to me. (he takes the flower fromROBIN) I know a place where wild thyme blooms, and oxlips and violets grow. Its covered over with luscious honeysuckle, sweet muskroses and sweetbrier.

woodbine, With sweet musk roses and with eglantine. There sleeps Titania sometime of the night, Lulled in these flowers with dances and delight. 245 And there the snake throws her enameled skin, Weed wide enough to wrap a fairy in. And with the juice of this Ill streak her eyes And make her full of hateful fantasies. (gives ROBIN some of the flower) Take thou some of it and seek through this grove: A sweet Athenian lady is in love With a disdainful youth. Anoint his eyes. But do it when the next thing he espies May be the lady. Thou shalt know the man By the Athenian garments he hath on. Effect it with some care, that he may prove More fond on her than she upon her love. And look thou meet me ere the first cock crow. Titania sleeps there sometimes at night, lulled to sleep among the flowers by dances and other delights. Snakes shed their skin there, and the shed skin is wide enough to wrap a fairy in. Ill put the juice of this flower on Titanias eyes, and fill her with horrible delusions and desires. (he givesROBIN part of the flower) You take some of it too, and look around in this part of the forest. A sweet Athenian lady is in love with a young man who wants nothing to do with her. Put some of this flowers juice on his eyes, and make sure to do it in such a way that the next thing he sees will be the lady. Youll be able to tell its him because hes wearing Athenian clothes. Do it carefully, so that hell end up loving her more than she loves him. And then make sure to meet me before the roosters first crow at dawn.

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ROBIN 255 Fear not, my lord. Your servant shall do so. Exeunt severally TITANIA, the Fairy Queen, enters with her following of FAIRIES.

ROBIN Dont worry, sir. Im at your service. They all exit, separately.

Enter TITANIA, Queen of Fairies, with her train ofFAIRIES

TITANIA Come now, a roundel and a fairy song. 5 Then for the third part of a minute, hence Some to kill cankers in the muskrose buds, Some war with reremice for their leathern wings To make my small elves coats, and some keep back The clamorous owl that nightly hoots and wonders At our quaint spirits. Sing me now asleep. Then to your offices and let me rest. FAIRIES sing FIRST FAIRY (sings) You spotted snakes with

TITANIA Come, dance in a circle and sing a fairy song, and then go off for a while to do your work. Some of you will kill the worms infesting the rosebuds, some of you will fight with bats to get their leathery wings, so we can make coats for my small elves. Some of you will keep that loud owl away, the one that hoots and wonders every night at us dainty fairies. Sing me to sleep now, and then go off to do your duties and let me rest.

The FAIRIES sing. FIRST FAIRY (singing) Snakes with forked tongues,

double tongue, Thorny hedgehogs, be not seen. Newts and blindworms, do no wrong. Come not near our fairy queen. FAIRIES 10 (sing) Philomel, with melody Sing in our sweet lullaby. Lulla, lulla, lullaby, lulla, lulla, lullaby. Never harm Nor spell nor charm Come our lovely lady nigh. So good night, with lullaby. FIRST FAIRY (sings) Weaving spiders, come not here. Hence, you long-legged spinners, hence! Black beetles, dont come near. Beetles black, approach not near. Worm nor snail, do no offense. Worms and snails, dont be bad.

And porcupines, dont be seen. Deadly lizards, dont be mean. Dont come near our fairy queen.

FAIRIES (singing) Nightingale, melodiously Sing our sweet lullaby. Lulla, lulla, lullaby, lulla, lulla, lullaby. Let no harm Or spell or charm Come near our lovely lady. Say good night with a lullaby. FIRST FAIRY (singing) Spiders with your webs, stay away. You long-legged things, begone!

FAIRIES (sing) Philomel, with melody Sing in our sweet lullaby. Lulla, lulla, lullaby, lulla, lulla, lullaby. Never harm Nor spell nor charm Come our lovely lady nigh. So good night, with lullaby. TITANIA sleeps SECOND FAIRY Hence, away! Now all is well. One aloof stand sentinel. Exeunt FAIRIES Enter OBERON OBERON 15 (squeezing flower juice on TITANIA s eyelids) What thou seest when thou dost wake, Do it for thy true love take. Love and languish for his sake. Be it ounce or cat or bear, Pard or boar with bristled hair,

FAIRIES (singing) Nightingale, melodiously Sing our sweet lullaby. Lulla, lulla, lullaby, lulla, lulla, lullaby. Let no harm Or spell or charm Come near our lovely lady. Say good night with a lullaby. TITANIA falls asleep. SECOND FAIRY Okay, lets go! Everythings fine now. One of us will stay and stand guard.

The FAIRIES exit. OBERON enters. OBERON (he squeezes flower juice on TITANIA s eyelids) Whatever you see first when you wake up, think of it as your true love. Love him and yearn for him, even if hes a lynx, a cat, a bear, a leopard, or a wild boar. Whatevers there when you wake up will be dear to you. Wake up when something nasty is nearby.

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In thy eye that shall appear, When thou wakest, it is thy dear. Wake when some vile thing is near. Exit OBERON Enter LYSANDER and HERMIA LYSANDER 25 Fair love, you faint with wandering in the wood. And to speak troth, I have forgot our way. OBERON exits. LYSANDER and HERMIA enter. LYSANDER My love, you look like youre about to faint from wandering in the woods for so long, and to tell you the truth, Ive gotten us lost.

Well rest us, Hermia, if you think it good. And tarry for the comfort of the day.

Well take a rest, if you think its a good idea, and wait until daylight when things will be easier.

HERMIA Be it so, Lysander. Find you out a bed, For I upon this bank will rest my head. LYSANDER 30 One turf shall serve as pillow for us both. One heart, one bed, two bosoms, and one troth. HERMIA Nay, good Lysander. For my sake,

HERMIA Lets do that, Lysander. Find something to cushion you while you sleep. Im going to rest my head on this little slope.

LYSANDER We can both sleep together on the grass. Well have one heart, one bed, two bodies, and one faithful vow.

HERMIA No, Lysander. Please, for my sake,

my dear, Lie further off yet. Do not lie so near. LYSANDER 35 O, take the sense, sweet, of my innocence. Love takes the meaning in loves conference. 40 I mean that my heart unto yours is knit So that but one heart we can make of it. Two bosoms interchaind with an oath So then two bosoms and a single troth. Then by your side no bed room me deny. For, lying so, Hermia, I do not lie. HERMIA Lysander riddles very prettily. 45 Now much beshrew my manners and my pride If Hermia meant to say Lysander lied. 50 But, gentle friend, for love and courtesy Lie further off in human modesty. Such separation as may well be

sleep a little farther away. Dont sleep so close to me.

LYSANDER Oh, sweetheart, I didnt mean anything naughty when I said that. When lovers talk to each other, their hearts should understand each other. I just meant that our hearts are joined, so we can almost think of them as one heart. Our two bodies are linked together by the promises weve made to each other, so there are two bodies and one faithful vow. So let me sleep next to you. If I lie nextto you, I wont lie to youIll be faithful and respect you.

HERMIA Lysanders got a way with words. I would certainly be rude and shameful if I had implied that you were a liar. But please, darling, sleep a little farther away so we can behave properly. Its only proper for a well-behaved bachelor and a well-behaved girl to be physically separated like this. Stay away for now, and good night, my sweet friend. I hope your love for me remains this

said Becomes a virtuous bachelor and a maid. So far be distant. And, good night, sweet friend. Thy love ne'er alter till thy sweet life end! LYSANDER Amen, amen to that fair prayer, say I. And then end life when I end loyalty! Here is my bed. Sleep give thee all his rest! HERMIA HERMIA With half that wish the wishers eyes be pressed! HERMIA and LYSANDER sleep Enter ROBIN ROBIN Through the forest have I gone. But Athenian found I none, 55 On whose eyes I might approve This flowers force in stirring love. (sees LYSANDER and HERMIA) ROBIN You sleep well too.

strong for your entire life!

LYSANDER Amen to that. I hope my life ends before my loyalty to you does. Ill sleep over here. Sleep well!

HERMIA and LYSANDER sleep. ROBIN enters.

Ive been through the entire forest, but I havent found any Athenian man to use the flower on. (he sees LYSANDER and HERMIA) Wait a second, whos this? Hes wearing Athenian clothes. This must be the guy who rejected the Athenian girl. And heres the girl, sleeping soundly on the damp and dirty ground. Pretty girl! She shouldnt lie near this rude

Night and silence! Who is here? Weeds of Athens he doth wear. This is he, my master said, Despisd the Athenian maid. And here the maiden, sleeping sound On the dank and dirty ground. Pretty soul! She durst not lie Near this lack-love, this killcourtesy. (squeezes flower juice on LYSANDERs eyelids) Churl, upon thy eyes I throw All the power this charm doth owe. When thou wakest, let love forbid Sleep his seat on thy eyelid. So awake when I am gone, For I must now to Oberon. Exit ROBIN Enter DEMETRIUS and HELENA, running HELENA Stay, though thou kill me, sweet Demetrius. DEMETRIUS I charge thee, hence, and do not

and heartless man. (he puts flower juice on LYSANDER s eyelids) Jerk, I throw all the power of this magic charm on your eyes. When you wake up, let love keep you from going back to sleep. Wake up when Im gone, because now I have to go to Oberon.

ROBIN exits. DEMETRIUS and HELENA enter, running.

HELENA Stop, Demetrius! Stop, even if only to kill me. DEMETRIUS Im telling you, get out of here, and dont

haunt me thus. HELENA O, wilt thou darkling leave me? Do not so.

follow me around like this. HELENA Oh, will you leave me alone in the dark? Dont.