Movie Analysis - Marriage Story - Muya Mark Anthony

Mark Anthony Demeterio Muya Movie Analysis - Marriage Story
Based on the movie "Marriage Story" answer the following questions.
1. Note down the instances of couple conflict in the movie and analyse the causes of the
conflict. Identify instances covering the different areas/causes of conflict. Analysis should be
based on the lessons on interactional conflict. (Give at least 5 instances of couple conflict. )
Man-woman Roles Conflict. In the movie, the husband seemed to be the one who takes
the course of their relationship. He decides for the family, of where to live, of what to do. He
wanted to remain in New York even though his wife wanted a one-year stay in Los Angeles with
her family. This behavior of the husband manifests too to his relationship with the child. He
usually insists what he wants to the child. One example is about the costume to use for
halloween. The husband seems to be dominating in the family. With behavior, there is no
chance for the wife nor the child to ask for their preference and make it happen. There is a need
for compromise, a give-and-take, in their family relationship. It is not necessary that a man shall
be higher or dominant over his wife.
Self-absorption of Husband. The husband is self-absorbed to himself. He is after his own
personal fame and career progress. Although the wife recognizes all the good qualities of the
husband, the husband is not aware of himself being narcissistic or selfish. Many of his
co-workers have recognized his selfishness, but the wife defended his husband. But eventually,
this attitude of the husband surfaced in their relationship.
Communication Problem. Husband desires to win in their filed case rather than for the
good of the child. The husband wanted to have his child with him and gain custody yet it seems
also that the husband protects his image as a winner. Actually, their relationship can be resolved
without needing to reach the judicial court, but they failed to communicate themselves to one
another. There is no need actually to win in a dialogue because it is a form by which they would
try to understand one another. Primarily, in connection to the self-absorption of the husband, he
does not want to listen anymore to the wife.
Sexual Restraint by Wife. One of the clamors of the husband of his infidelity is that the
wife restraint him to have sex. The husband then seems to be desiring for sexual intimacy and
yet not given by the wife.
The Wife and Husband Comparing themselves to their Parents. During the one-on-one
interaction of the husband and wife, there was a blurting out of words that the husband inherited
the values of his dad while the wife was compared to her mom and dad. They might have not
gone through a genogram as they wish to understand their behavior of where it comes from.!
2. Note also instances in the movie that showed hope for couple growth in their relationship.
Analyze the incident and explain the factors and how these could potentially lead to their
relationship growth. Give the instances that would illustrate the different factors that leads to
growth. Or alternatively, recommend actions that would address the conflict identified in No 1
above and that would lead to growth. Cite at least 5 examples.
Man-woman Roles Conflict. Generally, the husband and wife were personal-type in
terms of gender roles. The husband can do the wife’s household chores, and vice versa. They
are both loving parents to their child. What they need to work on more on this category is the
give-and-take compromise if ever husband and wife, and even with the child, whenever a
difference in preferences do exist. In the movie, the husband could have possibly granted the
request by the wife to live for a year in Los Angeles. The wife is struggling with her own identity
and uniqueness. She became tired of pleasing his husband with whatever he wanted. The
sense of personal growth and value to self-preference was lost when the wife is primarily
focused on pleasing what the husband has done. The relationship can grow if the husband is
able to learn the value of distinct identities as I-We-You. That the wife’s desires and preferences
should be met as well. The husband should not assume the happiness of his wife without regard
to the wife’s preferences and needs.
Self-absorption of Husband. To get rid from self-absorption is to become other-centered.
It is good to take care of ourselves and to elevate our social status. But to give more importance
to power, prestige and influence over one’s own relationship, these will result in filling-in oneself
than using these to become more charitable to others. The gifts that we receive ought not to be
kept but to be used for the enrichment of others. The husband should practice valuing the wife
and the child’s needs before his own prejudices and preferences.
Communication Problem. In the movie, it was too late that the husband was able to read
the affirming words of the wife. He thought that she does not recognize all the good works that
he does for the family. Giving affirmations to someone in a relationship makes one feel valued
and efforts recognized. Aside from this, perhaps, if they were only to become more open to their
feelings, they could have understood one another. Dialogue is a key in supporting relationships.
Sexual Restraint by Wife. Generally, this sexual need was not well communicated by the
husband to her wife. With this, it only appears during their one-on-one argumentation. It is
recommended to remain open and place dialogue as a tool for mutual understanding of their
personal needs.
The Wife and Husband Comparing themselves to their Parents. The upbringing of
children is definitely one big factor when someone is relating with the other. Couples are trying
to understand their partner through learning from their customs, culture, and family background.
But definitely, the circumstance in the present is different and one should not equate the
personhood of one’s partner to their own parents.

3. Develop a relevant psycho education plan for the couple.
Self-esteem and Self-awareness. Primarily, I wish to check the status of self-esteem
and self-awareness. This includes the queries on how affirming they were to their partner and
how they value the differentness/uniqueness of one another. All this can be discussed through
the image of the I-We-You diagram, showing the distinct identities of them even though they are
already married. They should come to know of each other’s preferences and needs.
Next, the ABC, which is the transition from conflict to growth.
A - Affective [With the goal of letting the couple realize their Defensiveness and be
transitioned to Openness. This may include of understanding past family origin, and their
recognition and acceptance of the personal woundedness.];
B - Behavioral/Interpersonal [This includes the formation of values that may lead from
Revenge to Forgiveness. Communication with others is vital to this point too. Forming
boundaries is essential as well that their unique identity may be guarded.]
C - Cognitive [This is a way of challenging one’s preconceived judgment or getting away
from imposing one’s preferences to others. Certitude is challenged and should transition to
openness and tentativeness. This also includes challenging irrational beliefs and welcoming the
presence and listening to the needs of their partner.]
Lastly, I would like to share with the couples the pyramid, demonstrating that the
couple's relationship could only get better and in harmony if they would live in the spirituality of
married life with God as center of it. God as center of their lives would highlight the equality of
their personhood and that they will cherish the values that God is already imparting to them, that
each should look at the divinity, of God’s presence within their life and others.

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Mark Anthony Demeterio Muya Movie Analysis - Marriage Story

Based on the movie "Marriage Story" answer the following questions.

be higher or dominant over his wife.

Self-absorption of Husband. The husband is self-absorbed to himself. He is after his own

this attitude of the husband surfaced in their relationship.

does not want to listen anymore to the wife.

yet not given by the wife.

above and that would lead to growth. Cite at least 5 examples.

to the wife’s preferences and needs.

Self-absorption of Husband. To get rid from self-absorption is to become other-centered.

personhood of one’s partner to their own parents.

3. Develop a relevant psycho education plan for the couple.

Self-esteem and Self-awareness. Primarily, I wish to check the status of self-esteem

Next, the ABC, which is the transition from conflict to growth.

recognition and acceptance of the personal woundedness.];

boundaries is essential as well that their unique identity may be guarded.]

C - Cognitive [This is a way of challenging one’s preconceived judgment or getting away

presence and listening to the needs of their partner.]

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