International Journal of English Literature and Social Sciences

Vol-7, Issue-4; Jul-Aug, 2022

Journal Home Page Available: https://ijels.com/

Journal DOI: 10.22161/ijels

Deconstructing the Traditional Family Representation in

Nick Hornby’s About a Boy and Hanif Kureishi’s Intimacy
Adamu Pangmeshi(Ph.D), David Toh Kusi(Ph.D), Ndode Divine Halle(MA)

1AssociateProfessor, The University of Bamenda, Cameroon

2Lecturer,
The University of Bamenda, Cameroon
3Department of English, Faculty of Arts, The University of Bamenda, Cameroon

Correspondence email: [email protected]

Received: 14 Jun 2022; Received in revised form: 10 Jul 2022; Accepted: 15 Jul 2022; Available online: 21 Jul 2022
©2022 The Author(s). Published by Infogain Publication. This is an open access article under the CC BY license
(https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/).

Abstract— This paper sets out to examine the traditional family in contemporary British fiction with focus
on Nick Hornby’s About a Boy and Hanif Kureishi’s Intimacy. The second half of the twentieth century
witnessed many changes in the structure of family formation and family behaviour that resulted in a
diversification of family forms. Consequently, it has become more and more difficult to use a general or
universally acceptable definition to define the the term ‘family.’ Using Jean-Francois Lyotard’s decentring,
or better still, lack of fixity as well as Louis Montrose’s inextricable link between literature and history and
Jacques Derrida’s a ‘decentered universe’, the paper interrogates and deconstructs typologies of family set-
ups emanating from the traditional family as depicted in Nick Hornby’s About a Boy and Hanif Kureishi’s
Intimacy. The paper therefore intimates that there is no ‘death of the family’ as heralded by some critics like
Judith Stacey in her discourse geared towards ‘rethinking family values in the postmodern age,’ but rather
a dramatic, and profound transformation. It further reveals that the literary representations of the family
now include other types of families that have thus expanded the paradigm of the family to what is perceived
in this study as triad, which, even though challenged, does not substitute the traditional family.
Keywords— family, representation, deconstruction, transformation, substitute.

I. INTRODUCTION and Britain in particular have experienced radical

The role and function of the family has drawn a great deal developments and changes in the social, cultural, political
of attention from a variety of disciplines such as politics, and economic domains of life. These changes included
history, religion and literary studies. Investigations about shifts in the perception of gender and sexuality, changes in
the family in the different disciplines have approached the the attitudes towards homosexuality, lesbianism, among
concept from various points of view. For example, Norman others. These developments and changes have profoundly
Bell, and Vogel Edward in A Modern Introduction to the challenged and crumbled not only the traditional family
Family regard the family as “a structural unit composed, as values, but they have also altered gender-based relations
an ideal type, of a man and woman joined in a socially and roles in both public and private spaces, resulting in what
recognized union and their children. Normally, the children Gill Jagger and Caroline Wright summarize in Changing
are the biological offspring of the spouses” (1). On his part, Family Values as “the growth of domestic partnerships and
Nicolas Glenn in A Critique of Twenty Families and decline in the popularity of marriage, as well as growth in
Marriage in Family Relations sees the family as the center the number of divorces, remarriage, single parenthood,
of reproduction, whose function has been of vital abortions” (16). Simply put, the new trend of family
importance for traditional societies throughout history (21). interaction seems to be evolving towards creating
alternative spaces and relationships for both man and
Since World War II, the western world in general
woman by distorting the hegemony of the heterosexual

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relations that were hitherto upheld in the traditional women is an increase in divorce cases, which has been one
patriarchal societies. The consequence of this shift of focus of the most visible features of family alteration in most
in the contemporary British society is the undermining of societies since the 1980s. In addition, the patriarchal
the basis of traditional family values, gender relations, concept of masculinity predicated around a male’s
identity, and roles. breadwinning role and that had become a central tenet of
There have been several reasons behind the post-war masculinity has been rendered untenable in the
increase in single parenthood, since the 1940s. One of the new post-industrial economy following the preference for
reasons is the development of the feminist movement, technological skills. All of these developments and changes
which has continued to challenge patriarchal family values, have endangered the traditional family.
male authority and perceptions, gender relations and roles The objective of this paper, therefore, is to
particularly since the 1960s, together with all the practices examine how families are depicted in contemporary British
that had limited before women’s movements and rights, fiction, and how the alteration of family norms contributes
curbed their freedom and inculcated into their mind that to a redefinition of the concept of family. For centuries, the
they were inferior to men. Eventually, the women’s suffrage traditional nuclear family was perceived as the only possible
activities have enabled them to gain some rights in that they form of family, while any other construct was out of place
have managed to shake off the chain which had locked them for such consideration. However, with the advent of
for ages. Hence, many women have preferred to live on their globalization and ideological plurality, adjustments have
own without marrying or they have chosen to live alone become necessary. Concepts that stood unchallenged for
after breaking up with their husbands. The second reason, centuries, such as race, nation, gender, and the family are
and closely related to the first is that more women have being re-examined and re-defined to suit contemporary
received formal education, which has availed them of the socio-cultural interactions. One of the problems plaguing
opportunity to gain freedom and privilege in the public the traditional family is the rampant cases of divorce
space. As a result, many women have started working, observed in the selected novels, especially when
which has caused them to achieve their economic investigated from the postmodernist’s perspective of choice
independence from their husbands, who had used their and lack of fixity or the absence of a centre, from the New
economic support as a master status to control women for Historicist’s inextricable link between history and literary
ages. This corroborates with Stacey’s claim in In the Name work, as well as from deconstructionist views of Jacques
of the Family when she argues that women have more Derrida’s a ‘decentered universe.’ The complexity of
freedom than ever before to shape their family arrangements twenty-first century English society that has led to an
to meet their needs and free themselves from patriarchal adjustment in family life, universally speaking, is an
oppression. important motivation to investigate the presentation of the
However, the development of single parenthood family in contemporary fiction for, unlike in past centuries
has also been viewed as a strong blow not only to the when family was one of the most standardized and
traditional family structure, but also to the stability and uncontroversial institutions depicted in literature,
security of society in several ways: the continuity of a contemporary societies have rendered the institution of the
society in the past, which was based upon the well-formed family dynamic and re-definable. This can clearly be seen
family is disrupted. The family of the past was seen as the in the fictional families presented in the novels of Nick
place to generate and promote culture and morality and then Hornby and Hanif Kureishi. In the selected novels, the
pass them on to the following generations. presentation of the family suggests a dislocation of the
traditional norm thereby necessitating the need to attempt a
The second half of the twentieth century has
re-examination and possibly a redefinition of the term
ushered in a paradigm shift in the patriarchal family system
‘family’ in accordance with contemporary literary discourse
fostered by women’s emancipation, education, a rise in
and society.
divorce rate, the emergence of modern technology, among
others. The emancipation of women and the subsequent
changes in their role and status in the English society have II. ‘SPLIT-UP’ MARRIAGES AS A
undoubtedly led to a reconsideration of the relationships REFLECTION OF FAMILY
between men and women both within and outside the DISINTEGRATION
family. Besides, the rise of the educational level of women Traditional family, especially with regard to societal norms
and their increasing participation in economic, professional, before the modernist and postmodernist eras, favoured a
and other social activities outside the home have resulted in clear definition of spaces for both the man (husband) and
a dwindling of the traditional importance of the status of the woman (wife) in the domestic spheres. Socially, the man
women as wives. A major outcome of the education of
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occupied the public space and had the responsibility of author demonstrates how the family structure and gender
fending for the family while the woman stayed at home to roles have changed in contemporary English society in
carry out domestic chores and catered for the children. The which the novel is set.
identities of men and women as well as their professions and From the outset, About a Boy announces ‘split-up’
roles were constructed and categorized in line with this of marriage relations and fragmented identities as a major
separation of space, since each space was associated with concern of the novel. The opening statement of the novel,
particular professions and roles to satisfy the social norms “Have you split-up now?” (1), suggests that marriage and
and standards of the society. Such traditional societies family disintegration are recurrent themes in the novel. This
considered the man to be largely educated, independent, is reflected in the utterances of characters such as Marcus, a
active, dominant, strong, and rational while the woman was twelve-year-old boy, whose mother (Fiona) and father
regarded as being less educated, passive, weak, emotional, (Clive) have divorced and now live separately. Marcus’
and economically dependent on man. Summarising the ceaseless interrogation of his mother when he reiterates the
different roles of the sexes in The Family in question: question and phrase, “have you split-up now?”, “you’ve
Changing Households and Families Ideologies, Diana split-up”, and “we’ve split-up”, emphasises that unstable
Gittins points out that the ‘proper’ role of the woman was marriage and family relationships are problems plaguing
deemed to be the full-time care of her children and husband, marriage and family life in his society. The recurrence of
and children were deemed to require a childhood that the phrase ‘split-up’ echoes this tendency of broken
inculcated in them the appropriate moral values and relationship in marriage evince not only the physical and
prepared them for adulthood, all in gender specific ways. psychological breakdown in the marital and familial
Men played the role as economic providers, as relationships, but also a view that the old unity, harmony
representatives of the family in public sphere and as a and togetherness of heterosexual relationships have been
source of moral authority (41).The men of the new middle irreversibly distorted.
classes used this gender division of labour within the family
Moreover, the phrasal verb ‘split-up,’ from the
as the basis for their claim to moral superiority. They
semiotic perspective of Jacques Derrida, may also refer to
asserted the virtues of husbands assuming financial and
the fragmented identities of children, following the
moral responsibility over wives who on their part managed
separation of the married couples, since it visibly disturbs
the domestic sphere.
the psyche of children from broken-up homes. Due to the
Contemporary socio-cultural, economic and psychological impact of these battered relationships
technological advancements have not only severely shaken between father and mother, children are affected socially
the foregoing order but have equally re-positioned the social and psychologically. They are largely unable to establish a
spaces with regard to gender roles. The question is no longer proper relationship in their lives. They are either introverted
a sex-defined space but one of capability and gender role. and anti-social or troublesome and exhibit abnormal social
In other words, the acquisition of education and skills as behaviours. Marcus’ case is a typical example. As a child of
well as growing emancipatory voices in favour of women the ‘split -up’ parents, Marcus experiences difficulty at
have destabilized and disintegrated not only the stable school. He is bullied because of his ‘hippy’ lifestyle (10),
heterosexual marriage and relationships but also the very owing to lack of adequate parenting. Marcus’ behaviour,
structure of the nuclear family, which used to be a model Kathryn Harrison holds, is seen in the lives of children of
family before the twentieth and twenty-first centuries. many single parents today (16). Through his lifestyle,
According to Ali Gunes in “From Mother-Care to Father- Marcus could be seen as wanting to draw attention to make
Care: The Split-Up of the Traditional Heterosexual Family up the vacuum created by the separation of his parents. The
Relationship and Destruction of Patriarchal Man’s Image narrator insinuates that Marcus and her mother are victims
and Identity in Nick Hornby’s About a Boy,” such of divorce:
contemporary revision of societal roles has affected
...Whenever he had been upset about
marriage and the family as social institutions. Gunes notes
anything before, there have usually turned
that young men and women no longer see the importance of
out to be some kind of answer. ...one that
marriage as divorce rate has increased dramatically, causing
mostly involves telling his mum what was
the emergence of single parenthood (12). This tendency has
bothering him. But there wasn’t anything she
negatively affected heterosexual relationships and hitherto
could do this time. She wasn’t going to move
accepted marriage norms and established roles and
him to another school, and even if she did, it
identities of man and woman. About a Boy depicts Hornby’s
wouldn’t make a whole lot of difference.
vision of these shifts in the perception from the earlier
He’d still be who he was, and that, it seemed
family norms to the contemporary family dynamism. The
to him, was the basic problem. (6)
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The issue of single motherhood or single parenthood has life, his fears, desires, and expectations reveal that he has no
drawn much attention as it has become a common issue in emotions for Susan, his wife. This lack of feelings provokes
the postmodern society, which is characterised by choice. the desire to find his true love elsewhere. Kathryn Harrison
Discussing the problem of single parenthood, Gill Jagger in “Connubial Abyss: The Mysterious Narrative of
and Caroline Wright in Changing Family Values explain, Marriage” corroborates this view when she states, “Jay
“lone motherhood means mothers parenting without the reveals himself to be a self-obsessed miserable man whose
father of their child or children following marital life is polluted by notions of romance” (86). Although he
breakdown, and, single motherhood means parenting by tries to find faults in Susan and thus gets an excuse to leave,
never married mothers” (30). This explanation fits squarely it is revealed that he has been having various love affairs for
with Fiona’s situation in the novel. years. Harrison qualifies him as one who suffers from
Since the 1940s, there has been a continuous “chronic unfaithfulness” (86), possibly owing to his desire
increase in the number of women having children outside to find true love. Jay is not committed to any of his sexual
marriage and bringing them up as single parents, together partners, and he does not want to accept marriage
with the number of women who single-handedly bring up responsibilities; little wonder that he declares, “there is little
their children after divorce. In About a Boy, Jessica, a pleasure in marriage; it involves considerable endurance,
member of the SPAT group (Single Parents Alone like doing a job one hates. You can’t leave and you can’t
Together), represents a single mother who singlehandedly enjoy it” (50).
brings up her children. The number of divorce cases Jay’s obsessive search for true love through a
identifiable in the novel shows that there is a decline in the series of meaningless sexual encounters may also be a
moral obligation of preserving traditional family values and consequence of his feelings of entrapment in the family
heterosexual marriages in the contemporary English relationship with Susan and their children. The act of
society. One of the factors responsible for this is the shift in forming a traditional family by means of a contract, legal or
the way family life and heterosexual marriages have been religious does have a limiting effect on certain liberties of
perceived since the 1960s. After this period, there have been the partner. In a traditional family, there is a strong demand
increasing anti-family attitudes, approaches and views for sexual exclusiveness, not as a choice, but as an
particularly among the young people in that they have seen obligation. Our “genital love” according to Sigmund Freud
the family, its values, roles and coded relationships not only is supposed to be of monogamous, natural and altruistic;
as a burden but also as limiting their freedom; they have that is, reproductive and heterosexual (25). Taking all these
been less enthusiastic to take responsibilities and face into account, it seems logical that to a character like Jay,
family challenges. marriage and family no longer represent a “safe harbour”
The idea of family breakup is equally recurrent in (32), the end of search for one’s soul mate and the ultimate
Kureishi’s Intimacy. The opening sentences of Intimacy goal in one’s private life through which all social, cultural
announce a split up between the protagonist, Jay, and his and biological expectations become realized. Instead,
wife, Susan: marriage is perceived as a restructure union, not just in the
sexual sense, which pressures the spouses into behaving in
It is the saddest night, for I am leaving and
a certain way.
not coming back. Tomorrow morning, when
the woman I have lived with for six years has Kureishi’s Intimacy is marked by the continuous
gone to work on her bicycle, and our children ambivalence between the protagonists’ desire for romance,
have been taken to the park with their ball, I which involves a lifetime love with a soul mate, and the
will pack some things into a suitcase, slip out need to expose marriage as a “job one hates” as Jane Dizard
of my house hoping that no one will see me, and Howard Gadlin in The Minimal Family recognize the
and take the tube to Victor’s place. There, for ambivalence in their sociological research explaining that
an unspecified period, I will sleep on the “We may still wish for ‘happily ever after’, but it is no
floor in the tiny room he has kindly offered longer believable” (97). To show his contempt for the
me, next to the kitchen. (8) institution of marriage which cannot guarantee eternal love,
but also to retain the appearance of “freedom,” Jay, like Will
In the novel Kureishi presents a family relation void of
and Duncan in Hornby’s About a Boy, has never agreed to
genuine love. Besides, the postmodernist’s notion of choice
marry Susan, although they live together and have two sons.
shapes the lives of Kureishi’s characters like Jay which is
Despite the fact that “cohabitation does not resolve the
reflected in his family life and even the family life of his
dilemma inherent in any attempt to combine long-term
friend, Victor, just before he is about to abandon his
commitment with recognition of each partner’s need for
family/wife and two sons. Jay’s reflections about his past
autonomy” (142), and that (technically and in most Western

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countries even legally), cohabitation with children counts economy. According to Dizard and Gadlin, research has
(and functions) as a traditional nuclear family, Jay feels that however shown that the constant focus on the ‘self’ always
he is making a statement by renouncing the traditional way: creates satisfaction of limited duration and even those who
“I still took it for granted that not marrying was a necessary are professionally successful, financially well-off and have
rebellion - The family seemed no more than a machine for an active social and sexual life, still report that something is
the suppression and distortion of free individuals. We could missing.
make our own original and flexible arrangements” As we consume goods, suggests Kureishi, so we
(Intimacy 60). also consume people, that is, relationships, blaming the
Gamophobia or the fear of marriage is on the rise effect of the capitalists’ production for the failure of the
in the twenty-first century. The novels under discussion traditional family. In The Origin of the Family, Private
suggest that marriage has unsatisfactory, burdensome and Property, and the State, Engels proposed the following:
source of strife. In fact, Asif, one of Kureishi’s protagonists, By transforming all things into commodities,
says “marriage is a battle, a terrible journey, a season in hell if (the capitalist production) dissolves all
and a reason for living. You need to be equipped in all areas, ancient traditional relations, and for inherited
not just the sexual” (39). It follows that in order to attain a customs and historical rights it substituted
successful marriage, one must almost be at apar with purchase and sale, ‘free’ contract...the
medieval knights who were bestowed with all kinds of closing of contracts presupposes people who
virtues needed to complete dangerous quests. The marital can freely dispose of their persons, actions
“battle” requires maturity, honesty, selflessness, and possessions, and who meet each other on
persistence, strength, and many other qualities from the equal terms. To create such ‘free’ and ‘equal’
spouses battling to make it work. However, as Nick Hornby people was precisely one of the chief tasks of
points out, young peoples’ priorities have changed, and not capitalist production. (748)
everyone perceives marriage as worthy of all kinds of
This presupposes that the capitalists placed more
sacrifice: “monogamy is against the law because we’re all
importance on possessions at the expense of human beings.
cynics and romantics, sometimes simultaneously, and
Such circumstances influenced a whole generation of
marriage, with its cliches and its steady low-watt glow, is as
people whom Kureishi refers to as the:
unwelcome to us as garlic is to vampire” (179). It may even
be argued that the demythologization of marriage, that is, Privileged and spoiled generation. The
the loss of faith in the romantic version of it or the fear that children of innocent consumerism and
one may not attain it despite the desire to do so, have inheritors of the freedom won by our
fostered a cynical attitude towards marriage and family as a seditious elders in the late sixties. We
means of self-preservation, which is demonstrated by weren’t much restrained by morality or
characters such as Kureishi’s Jay who simultaneously religion. Music, dancing and
searches for intimacy with a soul mate and looks down upon conscienceless fucking were our totems.
the marital happiness of others. We boasted that we were the freest
there’d ever been. (58-59)
Consequently, instead of trying to start a family as
soon as possible, young people today attempt to avoid Going by the quotation, importance is given to freedom in
sacrifice, especially for the benefit of others, and prefer to the postmodern society at the expense of moral values and
spend their time indulging in life’s pleasures or working on religion. The protagonist of Hornby’s About a Boy, Will
their self-improvement. Nevertheless, centuries of human Freeman, is a case in point. Will’s freedom, or rather
history has proven that it is not quite plausible to believe in unattachment, that is, not being responsible for anybody, is
the idea that being single is what people truly desire. Rather, not only symbolized by his last name, but is also realized
it may well be claimed that the new media trend of through his lifestyle. He refuses to have intimate
promoting the happy, wealthy single person into an ideal we friendships; his romantic relationships are acceptable only
should strive for is a direct result of the economic as occasional sexual encounters and he even refuses to
circumstances. In the consumerist society, single people commit to a job because he lives quite comfortably off the
represent a very important market segment because in their royalties for a Christmas song his father wrote. Mesmerized
lack of commitments that come with family life, they by the ideology of simulation and consumption, he
become dependent on the market place. Consumerism is represents the contemporary individual who wishes to
important for sustaining the autonomy of the single person indulge in all sorts of pleasures, to be free and not
and the market place is a settling for social encounters, responsible to anyone as seen below:
which is why the individual is very important for the current Will wondered sometimes how people like

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him would have survived sixty years ago. something to make his problems disappear. The trials of life
People who didn’t really do anything all day, are reduced to matters of exchange. Will’s reliance on
and didn’t want to do anything much, wealth and what it buys him fosters an aggressive
either...there were no daytime TV, there were selfishness, a result desired by Thatcher’s administration
no videos, there were no glossy magazines which Stuart Hall and Martin Jacques call “the ideology of
which would have left books. Books! He selfishness, one of the main underpinnings of Thatcherism”
would have had to get a job. Now, though, it (251).
was easy. There was almost too much to do. Besides, Will embodies the “meanness of spirit”
You didn’t have to have a life of your own which Salman Rushdie attributes to Thatcherite Britain. His
anymore; you could just peek over the fence selfish individualism translates into a cruel indifference for
at other people’s lives, as lived in newspapers others. He often reveals the Thatcherite stance that every
and East Enders and films. (7-8) person must fend for himself. If other people do not have
This contrasts sharply with the postmodern society where what he has, then they have gone wrong somewhere in their
the notion of choice and the absence of a centre has rendered lives, and he should not be expected to supplement their
the traditional family irrelevant. Postmodernists such as finances. Will’s ideology is clear; he does not want people
Judith Stacey argue that recent social changes such as to insinuate themselves into his posh, uncomplicated life. In
increasing social fragmentation and diversity have made the fact, his sentiments amount to little more than an echo of the
traditional family more of a personal choice and as a result, conservative manifesto. Stuart Hall and Martin Jacques
it has become more unstable and more diverse. She explain that in Thatcher’s Britain “the road to salvation lay
intimates further that we no longer leave in the modern through people pulling themselves up by their bootstraps.
world with predictable orderly structures, such as the The only acceptable motive for action was self-interest”
nuclear family. Instead, society has entered a new chaotic (251). Will ensures his own self-being, and he wants Fiona
postmodern age. Will Freeman is an example of postmodern and others to do the same:
humanity. This can be portrayed in the carefree life he lives. You had to live in your own bubble. You
He wants to live as an island. He says: couldn’t force your way into someone else’s
In my opinion, all men are islands. And because then it wouldn’t be a bubble any
what’s more, now’s the time to be one. This more. Will bought his clothes and his CDs
is an island age. A hundred years ago, for and his cars and his Heal’s furniture and his
instance, you had to depend on other people. drugs for himself, and himself alone; if Fiona
Whereas now, you can make yourself a little couldn’t afford these things, and didn’t have
island paradise...and I like to think that, an equivalent bubble of her own, then that
perhaps, I’m that kind of island. (46) was her lookout. (67-70)
Will Freeman is a perfect model for the possessive Will is a little more than a social Darwinist. Fiona’s bubble
individual, Stuart Hall’s designation for the self-reliant is not the government’s concern, and it certainly is not
person whose primary goal is to acquire wealth and Will’s either. Margaret Thatcher once told a group of
property. As an independently wealthy man, he needs no entrepreneurs: “The only thing I’m going to do for you is to
assistance from anyone, and this independence allows him make you freer to do things for yourself. If you can’t do it,
to disengage from the world around him. In fact, his I’m sorry. I’ll have nothing to offer you” (236). Will is a
consumerism is ultimately his only purpose in life. He does product of this ideology. He believes that his indifference
not only base his importance on what he has acquired, but towards others is both natural and healthy.
he focuses on the price of his purchase as well. When a Moreover, the fact that a single person commits to
woman asks him why he doesn’t put his head in the oven, a relationship in ways that the consumer commits to
his answer is that “there’s always a new Nirvana album to commodities keeps one continually dissatisfied because it
look forward to” (250). His desire for the next rock album leaves hardly any possibility for achieving true intimacy:
may suggest that he is interested in art, but his life is driven “Jessica and Will split up when Jessica wanted to exchange
by the need and ability to acquire the next new thing. He the froth and frivolity for something more solid: Will had
mentions throughout the novel that possessions will cure missed her, temporarily, but he would have missed the
any negative condition. He believes very strongly that clubbing more” (10). This shows that Will values
purchasing power is the cure for every problem and a commodities (things) more than human beings. The
measure of a person’s value. If he feels insignificant, the “clutter” of family life seems like “disgrace” (8) to Will and
carefully chosen purchase will restore his self-worth. If his he doesn’t even want to spend time with friends who have a
world begins to look a little bleak, he can always buy
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family: “he had no use for them whatsoever. He didn’t want “Mother was only partially there, most of the day she sat,
to meet Imogen, or know how Barney was, and he didn’t inert and obese, in her chair. She hardly spoke except to
want to hear about Christine’s tiredness, and there wasn’t dispute; she never touched anyone, and often wept, hating
anything else to them anymore. He wouldn’t be bothering herself and all of us... she was aware of it, in some way.
with them again” (10). One could claim that, paradoxically, ‘Selfish’, she called herself” (51). She was both unhappy for
under the auspices of the humanistic psychology that fosters having children because “children stop you living” (61), and
self-realization, the prevailing human attitudes, values and at the same time for being so selfish for not being a proper
beliefs have become distinctly hedonistic, if not selfish and mother, just like other women are. With time, as she found
thus less humane in nature. a job, and even more so after her two sons left to live their
The reluctance to take up family life often does not own lives, she resumed the kind of life she once led with her
simply result from the desire for personal freedom and husband: “when my brother and I left, our parents started
independence, but also from fear of failure: “What if I am going to art galleries, to the cinema, for walks, and on long
not good enough to be a husband or wife, a mother or holidays. They took a new interest in one another, and
father”?(24). Yet, because they need to present themselves couldn’t get enough of life... my parents went through the
in such a way as to be ‘marketable’, single people cannot darkness and discovered a new intimacy” (52).
afford to show their vulnerability. Instead, searching for According to Jay’s mother, the experience of
some of external reassurance that they are not cowards or having children, of being responsible for them is not an easy
failures because they are single, they like Will Freeman read task. She proves that parenting can be very frustrating
magazines and books that tell them that being single is because it requires constant and utter selflessness. The only
“cool”(24) as evident in Hornby’s About a Boy. thing a parent may expect and hope for is the emotional
From the forgoing analysis, it is established that satisfaction of having an offspring, but the risks and
divorce and the lack of interest in marriage are recurrent as frustration seem to be much higher. Jay’s mother struggles
far the traditional family is concerned. The reasons for this through the feeling that she has given up on her life and
include individualistic ethos, postmodern view of life, ambitions for the sake of her children and manages to find
among others. This therefore gives room for other family happiness again once her sons have grown up and become
forms to come to the fore in addition to the traditional independent.
family. In addition, in About a Boy, Hornby deals with the
negative outcomes of single parenthood in the 1990s of
British society. For example, Will Freeman’s new flirt,
III. THE EMERGENCE OF NEW FORMS OF
Angie, is a single mother who views single motherhood as
FAMILY
a reaction against man’s organization of woman’s life in a
The traditional family does no longer occupy the centre way that fits his view of the world as well as his way of life
stage in the postmodern world. This therefore means that as he says:
there is lack of fixity, what Jacques Derrida refers to as a
I’ll tell you {Will} although he had missed
‘decentered universe’ (10). According to him in “Structure,
much of the cogitation that had brought her to
Sign and Play in the Discourse of the Human Sciences”, the
this point, when you’re single mother, you’re
word has lost its value, as language does not reflect the
far more likely to end up thinking in feminist
world we live in, but shapes it so that we end up seeing
cliches, You know, all men are bastards, a
things not as they really are, but as we think they are, or, in
woman without a man is like a. a. something
other words, as we interpret them. A ‘decentered universe’
that does not have any relation to the first
is a world which has lost its points of reference; it is a
something, all that stuff. (10)
universe in which nothing is certain anymore, since the
concepts which previously defined its center have lost their As seen in the quotation, Angie as a single mother is
value and thus do not represent reliable points of reference disturbed, and angry with men and their view about single
anymore as Peter Barry opines (64). This can be applied to mothers due to their lack of understanding and concern,
the traditional family which has lost its values as a result of since she says that men think that women are nothing
the advent of other family forms such as the single-parent without men; their identity is not complete without men, so
family. that women have to depend on men. Traditionally, a single
woman was half alive without a complete identity; marriage
Concerning single-parent family, which is one of
was considered a school, where women would get their
the representations of family, Jay’s mother in Kureishi’s
identity fully completed, so that single women had not been
Intimacy is a case in point. After having two boys, she got
considered well in a traditional society. However, Angie
depressed because she had no life of her own as she says:

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refuses the connection between the first ‘something’ and the the new form of fatherhood and motherhood Will and Angie
next one, which obviously demands a woman to attach imagine; single fathers and mothers could meet and have
herself to a man. For her, it is a foolish idea; it is ‘all that sex and then live in their separate houses without
stuff’ in the sense that being a single mother may have a commitment, yet it is quite different from the relationship
meaning for her as an alternative way of family life as of a father and mother in a traditional family. For example,
opposed to the traditional one. That is, being a single mother Fiona has separated from her husband who abandons her
enables her to gain her identity and freedom. This equally and goes and stays with his girlfriend in Cambridge. Now
illustrates the concept of choice in postmodernism. she is a working single mother with her twelve-year-old son,
Individuals in the postmodern society have the right to go Marcus, and has to face the difficulties of life alone at home
in for what pleases them not minding the interests of others. as well as at work. But Marcus is not the only child whose
Social bonds like marriage are therefore irrelevant. What is parents live separately. There are, “a million kids whose
important is individualistic ethos. parents have split. And none of them are living with their
On the other hand, what is also equally important dads” (182). This is a contemporary family phenomenon
is that both men and women are victims of the traditional and reality, taking place around the world: children without
views which assign certain roles and professions for them fathers.
as husband and wife, and they are unable to strip themselves Besides, contemporary fiction represents two
off these views and roles, intimates Deborah Chambers in kinds of families based on emotional rather than biological
New Social Ties: Contemporary Connections in a or legal ties: the metaphorical and the homosexual family.
Fragmented Society. Thus, Will Freeman is very much Metaphorical families are those in which (some) family
under the impact of the view of fatherhood culturally members are neither kin nor bound by religious or legal
allocated to him, and this view obviously influences his contracts. Rather, they are a group of people who are
interactions, decisions, thoughts, and behaviour with the committed to each other and who prove their commitments
opposite sex. He is bold and free in his attitudes in that he by permanent help, understanding and sharing of
always thinks of how society and culture will view him. experiences. In contemporary fiction, the acknowledgment
Eventually, Angie proposes a different view of fatherhood of these families does not aim to in the words of Kath
for Will, in which he will satisfy his need of fatherhood in Weston “oppose genealogical modes of reckoning kinship.
an unconditional way that he will be with single mothers Instead, they undercut procreation’s status as a master term
and children for a while and then will depart from them imagined to provide the template for all possible kinship
without any commitment to each other. During the talk with relations” (213), the template being, of course, the tradition
Angie about mothers and children, for example, Will begins nuclear family. Nevertheless, starting families that are
to get excited at the idea of a family suggested by Angie. anything other than a traditional nuclear family is perceived
He, Angie and her three-year-old son, Joe, meet regularly; as beginning of “destruction of family values” (314), Jodi
they go to Mc Donald’s and visit the Science Museum and Picoult intimates, which makes one wonder what “family
the National History Museum; they cruise in the river as values” are. To illustrate a dysfunctional nuclear family to
friends without any obligation, and this ‘new relationship’ which parents are unfaithful to each other, or a family with
and the idea of ‘fatherhood’ fascinates Will: abusive members cannot be said to promote family values
He had convinced himself that fatherhood simply because it consists of two heterosexual parents and
would be a sort of sentimental photo - their biological child(ren). If, however, family values
opportunity, and fatherhood Angie -style was include love, commitment, safety, security, and integrity,
exactly like that: he could walk hand-in-hand then these values do not depend on the form of the familial
with a beautiful woman, children gamboling unit.
happily in front of them, and everyone could Despite the fact that metaphorical families which
see him doing it, and when he had done it for is one of the focus of this paper, have not yet been legalized,
an afternoon he could go home if he wanted contemporary fiction writers like Hornby and Kureishi
to. (11) recognize the fact that people connect with one another in
This implies that Will prefers a type of family lifestyle that various ways. Hornby’s About a Boy describes the
will guarantee his freedom, and this cannot come from the constitution of enlarge metaphorical family consisting of
traditional heterosexual family relationship, but from single people who feel the need to connect and be close to people
parent family. In this case, the traditional family is not only that they are not related to by blood or law. Will Freeman,
relegated to the background, but does no longer occupy a the main protagonist is an immature thirty-six years old man
centre stage. It therefore competes with other forms of who lives off the royalties for one of his father’s Christmas
family. This is a new kind of family relationship as well as songs. Being able to live comfortably without having to

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work, he indulges in shopping, listening to music, watching typically provides. Her suicide attempts to make Marcus
TV and having a series of meaningless (sexual) painfully aware of the fact that at any time he could be left
relationships, rejecting any kind of commitment. After alone in the world. This prompts him to the conclusion (or,
rejecting the fact that women who are single-parents also rather, realization), that the most important function of the
have trouble committing, he comes up with the idea of family is taking care of each other and making sure one is
attending a single parents’ group as a new way of picking not alone in the world. He also realizes that this function
up women suitable for short-term relationships. At one of needs to be of a permanent nature, and that it is not
the single-parents’ meetings, he meets the twelve-year-old, important who your family is, but simply that there actually
Marcus whose mother suffers from depression, is suicidal is someone you can count on: “Two wasn’t enough, that was
and overprotective because of the fact that he mostly the trouble. He’d always thought that two was a good
interacts with his mother, and has no idea what teenagers do number, and that he’d hate to live in a family of three or four
and like. Marcus becomes the target of bullies and has a or five. But he could see the point of it now: if someone
hard time at school. Their meeting is crucial for both Marcus dropped off the edge, you weren’t left on your own.” (75).
and Will since they begin to help each other in their mutual For Marcus, it makes no difference whether he is
struggle to achieve maturity. Will is able to show Marcus actually related to the people who will take care of him or
how to be ‘cool’ and less afraid of life, and at the same time, not. They do not have to be kin or bound by some kind of
begins to appreciate the value of a familial relationship, and contract. What connects people into his/any metaphorical
thus, deals with his fear of commitment. As the story family is the emotional component of a relationship.
progresses, both of them meet different people who all Because the circumstances of his life have taught him very
become a part of their metaphorical family. It includes: early on that a legal contract does not prevent the family
Ellie, a rough, fifteen-year-old girl who is constantly in from falling apart, Marcus very maturely realizes that
trouble at school and who ‘adopts’ Marcus as her protégé people need to want to be together. From that moment, he
and friend, Marcus’ mother, his father, his father’s new works hard at creating relationships that would alleviate his
girlfriend, his father’s mother, and finally Rachel, a single loneliness and fear, until, by the end of the novel, he
mother who has a son named Ali about the same age as becomes a part of a large family. Will, who is neither
Marcus, and with whom Will falls in love. By the end of the romantically nor legally connected to Marcus, and his
novel, they all function as a large family; they meet for mother, Fiona, comes to realize that he is becoming a part
holiday and important events, and provide support and love of a new kind of family consisting of kin, ex-spouses and
to one another. The novel is a “coming of age” (41) story on friends as he arrives for Christmas lunch at Marcus’ house:
several levels. Not only do both Will and Marcus mature
There was Marcus’ dad, Clive, and his
thanks to the help of their family members, but the
girlfriend, Lindsey and his girlfriend’s mum,
institution of family seems to mature as well, through the
six of them altogether...Will didn’t know that
ability to overcome and function without the unreliable
the world was like this. As the product of a
formal demands of blood and law.
1960’s second marriage, he was labouring
In addition, thinking about his life, Marcus realizes under the misapprehension that when
that his “first sort of life” (21), which implies the time families broke up some of the constituent
before his parents got divorced has ended, forever parts stopped speaking to each other, but the
indicating symbolically, also the end of the traditional setup here was different. (177)
family in general: “The first sort of life had ended four years
Although Marcus’ parents are divorced, they still care for
ago, when he was eight and his mum and dad had split up,
Marcus and each other’s benefit, which allows them to be a
that was the normal, boring kind, with school and holidays
part of a metaphorical family even though their original
and homework and weekend visits to grandparents” (3). The
traditional family has collapsed. Family, whatsoever its
second sort of life includes more people, more places,
constituent parts may be, gives Marcus a sense of security,
nothing is steady; there is no security of a home or a steady
a sense of belonging and an inner strength one needs to cope
relationship with adults who take care of him: “the second
with everyday’s events:
sort was messier and there were more people and places in
it: his mother’s boyfriends and his dad’s girlfriends; flats I can’t explain it, but I feel safer than before,
and houses; Cambridge and London. You wouldn’t believe because I know more people. I was really
that so much could change just because a relationship scared because I didn’t think two was
ended” (3). The breakdown of his nuclear family has left a enough, and now there aren’t two anymore.
hole in his life because his suicidal mother was incapable of There are loads. And you’re better off that
creating a feeling of safety and belonging that a family way. But, see, I didn’t know before that

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anyone else could do that job, and they can. intimate relationships with other people. What Hornby
You can find people. It doesn’t really matter proposes in About a Boy is that this intimate relationship,
who they are, does it, as long as they’re typically considered to be epitomized in the form of a
there...because you can’t stand on top of your traditional nuclear family, need not be realized within this
mum and dad if they’re going to mess around traditional framework. All one needs are people who are
and wonder off and get depressed. (298-299) willing to commit and participate in each other’s life,
The lack of support from family is one of the regardless of their blood or legal ties. Marcus’ relationship
problems that necessitates the formation of communities in to Will echoes Judith Stacey’s proposal in In The Name of
About a Boy, such as SPAT (Single Parents Alone the Family that in a postmodern society, people should
Together). The name of the group underscores the fact that foster a collective, rhizomatic responsibility for children by
people cannot function well without understanding and drawing on our communitarian sentiments. She asserts that
support. The community (family type) functions as a place many childless adults are assuming pseudo parenting roles,
where people who need support can come when they need or, para-parenting, to use her term, by forming, nurturing
that assistance. Perhaps, the only requirements for inclusion long-term relationships with children of overburdened
are being a single parent and being frustrated. Suzie parents (80), which in fact signifies and speaks for a more
explains what she finds so refreshing about the group: “One frequent forming of metaphorical families.
of the reasons l like coming here is that you can be angry The new circumstances in Marcus’ life caused not
and no one thinks any the less of you. Just about everyone’s only by the fact that his parents got divorced but also by his
got something they’re angry about” (40). Although they are realization that you get love from people other than your
alone, without family to help them, SPAT becomes a biological family made him aware of the fact that there are
replacement for family, uniting people who can offer one no guarantees in traditional relationships and that a
another emotional support. Knowing that they are not alone traditional family is not a place of safety or security at all.
seems to help many of them carry on with their lives. The Getting married is not “the right way” (46), says Marcus,
group is comprised almost entirely of women, and they meet and proposes a new way of organizing human life:
to discuss their frustrations and vent their anger. The You know when they do those human
reasons for these women being on their own are a laundry pyramids? That’s the sort of model for living
list of men walking away from their families: “There were I am looking at now...you’re safer as kid if
endless ingenious variations on the same theme. Men who everyone’s friends...if your mum and Will
took one look at their new child and went, men who took get together, you think you’re safe, but
one look at their new colleague and went, men who went for you’re not, because they’ll split up or Will
the hell of it” (40). Nearly every member of the group has a will go mad or something. I just don’t think
similar story to tell of family members walking out on them. couples are the future. (304)
The traditional nuclear family, which is highly Marcus’ idea of a human pyramid as an ideal model for
stratified and has a definitive, strict form, follows binary living does not rely on the symbolic interpretation of this
logic as its root principle, much like the classical books or geometric form which implies a hierarchy with the person
ways of thinking: the metaphorical family, however, on top given the most power or importance. On the contrary,
represents an indefinite multiplicity of secondary roots that Marcus refers to the fact that in a human pyramid, everyone
graft out the basic root, that is structure, whereby the family depends on one another, as everyone is equal and equally
undergoes a flourishing development. While the basic important. Everyone’s limbs are mutually connected or
family form is changed by ‘natural reality’, still the roots, touching in order to hold on to each other, and sustain each
that is the family’s unity subsists (5). Like Delueze and other’s weight, and in effect, they strongly resemble the
Guttari’s philosophy, the form of the metaphorical family multiple roots of a rhizome. One has to be able to rely on
seems a radical innovation; it in fact simply signifies an others in order not to fall to the ground, but the people who
adaptation to the contemporary reality which favours form the pyramid and whom you trust your life with are not
multiplicity and equality over binary dichotomy and necessarily your kin. The pyramid works as long as
hierarchy. everyone has the same goal, and has the well-being of all at
Consequently, thanks to its focus on the feeling heart. Unlike the traditional family, which can formally
and meaning, rather than form, the metaphorical family through a legal or religious contract still exist even after the
gave Will “a glimpse of what it was to be human. He wasn’t emotional components of loyalty and love have long gone,
too bad, really; he wouldn’t even mind being human on a the pyramid will collapse the minute anyone of its members
full-time basis” (292). Isolated, cynical life is unfulfilling decides not to hold the other(s) any longer. What is crucial
and people have both the desire and the need to make here is the feeling of commitment which, as it seems, does
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