WEEKS

7-8
Revising a Draft
Lesson
I
Many students commit mistakes in revising the draft of their paper. Not only are
their papers often filled with typographical errors and other problems, but they
lack the benefits of a fundamental stage in the writing process: revision.
Mechanics, clarity, chronology, appropriateness and effectiveness are some of the
aspects that we consider whenever we are revising our works. Revising helps us
improve our work to attain the objectives as to why we are writing a certain
literary piece.
In this lesson, you are expected to revise your draft produced in the previous
lesson considering the clarity of idea, appropriateness of choice of literary
element, appropriateness use of the element and effective combination of the idea
and the chosen literary element to come up with a short piece using any of the
literary conventions of genre.

D
At the point when we reconsider our composition, we accept the open door to step
back and re-imagine it. We consider the objectives of the paper if we have
achieved these objectives. We guarantee that our thoughts are obviously
communicated and all around upheld. Also, we verify that mistakes of
punctuation and style do not take away from our work or make it appear that the
paper was arranged properly.

Learning Task 1: Recall your previous understanding about the writing process.
Draw or illustrate the writing process that you know. Do this in your notebook.

Learning Task 2: Arrange the steps in revising a draft based on the provided
steps below. Write numbers 1-4 to determine the process. Write your answers in
your notebook.
_____ 1. Check the transitions used in a text.
_____ 2. Skim the paragraphs and identify the main ideas.
_____ 3. Determine if the paragraphs help the main ideas.
_____ 5. Scan the mechanics of the text.
Learning Task 3: Read the questions below with understanding. Answer the
question and write your answers in your notebook.

1. Have you tried following the writing process? How was it?
 2. Among the phases of the writing process, which is difficult for you?
3. How did you deal with it?

Before releasing a piece to the audience, it is important to review the piece

in accordance to the aspects which were considered during the evaluation.
Revising or editing can be ways to improve one’s write-up.

Revising literally means “to see again” not just once but multiple times.
Revision has two types of processes where the larger problems such as content
and organization and the smaller problems such as sentence structure, word
choice, and formatting shall both be considered in revising your output. Revising
will help you to notice the other elements of your write-up from the mechanics,
structure, coherence of the paragraphs and its core.

Some portion of updating may incorporate requesting that others read

drafts and make modification proposals. Eventually, it's consistently up to the
author whether those update suggestions will be actualized into the last draft.

Revising your first draft is really a challenging task. You are stood up to
with your mistakes; you will discover helpless exchanges and shallow characters,
you will find plot openings, lost backstories, etc. Regularly, this encounter will
make you need to stop, to toss the many pages and give up. In any case, as
writers, we should not stop writing.

However, to attain the improvement, you have to accept the evaluation in a

positive outlook for the betterment of the piece and for your improvement as well.

Most of the beginning writers failed to create a draft effectively not

exclusively are their papers frequently loaded up with typographical errors and
different issues, yet they come up short on the advantages of a basic stage in the
writing process and that is the revision.

At the point when we revise our write-up, we accept the open door to step
back and re-imagine it. We consider the objectives of the paper and whether we
have achieved these objectives. We guarantee that our thoughts are obviously
communicated and very much upheld. What's more, we verify that blunders of
syntax and style don't take away from our work or make it look like the paper was
arranged quickly.

Publishing
Publishing involves submitting final manuscripts to editors of print and
online journals and magazines, newspapers, or publishing companies.

Although it’s great to see one’s name in print, not all writers write for
publication. Some write their stories, poems, letters, diaries, etc. for the next
generations – their children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. They write
to record their personal history.
 In revising your draft, some of the aspects shall be considered like mechanics,
content, style, substance and the structure of the piece. You have learned in the
previous lesson about some of the aspects that need to be evaluated for the
improvement of the text.
In revising for style as a writer, vague writing and mechanical flaws detract from
your insights. As you revise your work considering your writing style, try to take a
look on the following questions:

1. Have you used passive voice abusively in your text?

2. Were you gender neutral in using a language?
3. Did you use precise and concise language and diction?
4. Did you edit out language or syntax that is repetitive?
5. Have you corrected grammatical flaws and provided accurate information like
names and dates?

Moreover, in revising for structure, as you read, you need to make sure that your
write-up has a strong structure. As you revise your work considering the
structure, try to take a look on the following questions:

 Did you use a clear and logical pattern to prove your concept?
 Did you provide a clear introduction stating the purpose of the piece?
 Are the paragraphs unified and developed?
 Were you able to establish topic sentences effectively?
 Were you able to utilize paragraphs that helped the progress of the topic
sentences?
 Do you have transitions between paragraphs and between sections?
7. Does your piece have a well-reasoned and interesting conclusion?

As you read your work, revise also the substance of your piece. As you look into
it considering the substance, take a look on the following questions:

 Did you clearly state the thesis statement of the piece?

 Did you present your own analysis?
 Did your piece provide reflective insights of the text?
 Did you include specific evidence to support your ideas? Is this evidence
analyzed and explained?
 If applicable, were you able to establish the characters and other literary
elements?
 If applicable, did the plot sequence run well? Was it easy to understand?

Now that you have been guided with some of the questions, these will help you in
revising your own draft at the end of this lesson.

In proofreading or checking the mechanics, the draft should focus on formatting

and accuracy of the grammatical functions. In doing this, hard-copy instead of
just reading from your computer screen will be more effective. In doing
proofreading, you need to read it aloud and check it intensively.

Let us try to remember the actions and decisions below in doing a revision of a
piece. This would help us to attain the improvement of our text. Just remember
the word DRAFT and you will be guided properly in revising your piece.

DELETE unnecessary and repeated words, parts or sequences. Are there words or
parts that are needless or unnecessary which can be deleted and will not affect
the content or flow of the piece? If there are, delete them.

REARRANGE the paragraphs, sentences, clauses or words. Are there words or

sentences that need to be rearranged to attain the chronological arrangement of
the piece? If there are, rearrange them.

ADD some connectors, transitional devices or even information. If there are still
information that need to be included, add them. The use of connectors and
transitional devices will help to attain the smooth flow of the piece.

FORM each of the parts that are needed in the piece. Recalling the nonfiction
type, there are certain parts that should be present. Even the elements needed in
a type of nonfiction shall be formed and formulated.

TALK it aloud. Reading the text aloud surely reveals the errors of the write-up.
Various versions and modification can be made if we keep on reading it before
publishing. Does it sound right? Sound smooth? Better to read it aloud.

E
Learning Task 4: Identify the words or parts of the paragraph that needs to be
revised according to its mechanics. Do this in your notebook.

Malacañang are optimistic it can change the minds of senators on the 2nd
package of the Tax Reform for Acceleration and Inclusion (TRAIN 2) law after a
Senate leader said noone in the chamber is willing to sponsor the measure.

On the contrary, TRAIN 2 will reduce corporate taxes. So, its not true that TRAIN
2 will impose new taxes” Roque said at a press briefing yesterday in Zamboanga
Sibugay. “I think its a matter of telling senators the what TRAIN 2 is and I think
we can overcome their initial hesitansy.

He add that the Palace expect the Presidentiallegislative Liason Office to work
with senators to discuss the matter.

TRAIN 2 aimsto reduce corporate income tax to twenty five percent from 30
percent. The department finance said the measure would benefit more than ninety
five percent of busineses in the country that are paying the highest corporate
income tax rate in the region.
Learning Task 5: Go back with your created draft. See the comments of your
teacher’s evaluation. Among the evaluation comments, which from these should be
considered? Accomplish the table in your notebook.

Areas Comments For Consideration or Not?

Mechanics

Substance

Style

Structure

Literary Elements

Genre

A
Learning Task 6: Revise your draft considering any of the literary conventions of
genre in nonfiction. The comments of your subject teacher may help you in
improving your output.