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Chapter 2 Writing Inprovement Exercises

The document contains exercises for improving writing skills, including revising sentences to emphasize the audience perspective, use a conversational yet professional tone, express information positively and courteously, reduce bias, use plain language and familiar words, and choose precise vigorous words. The exercises provide guidelines and examples for applying these writing techniques.

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Melvialyn Gementiza
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130 views5 pages

Chapter 2 Writing Inprovement Exercises

The document contains exercises for improving writing skills, including revising sentences to emphasize the audience perspective, use a conversational yet professional tone, express information positively and courteously, reduce bias, use plain language and familiar words, and choose precise vigorous words. The exercises provide guidelines and examples for applying these writing techniques.

Uploaded by

Melvialyn Gementiza
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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CHAPTER 2 WRITING INPROVEMENT EXERCISES

Audience Benefits and the “You” View: Using the guidelines and examples on page 45 in the text, revise the
following sentences to emphasize the perspective of the audience and the “you” view. (Obj. 4)
1. Original Sentence:
We have prepared the enclosed form that may be used by victims to report identity theft to creditors.
Revision:

2. Original Sentence:
To help us process your order with our new database software, we need you to go to our website and fill out
the customer information required
Revision:

3. Original Sentence:
We are now offering RapidAssist, a software program we have developed to provide immediate technical
support through our website to your employees and customers.
Revision:

4. Original Sentence:
We find it necessary to restrict parking in the new company lot to those employee vehicles with “A”
permits.
Revision:

5. Original Sentence:
To avoid suffering the kinds of customer monetary losses experienced in the past, our credit union now
prohibits the cashing of double-endorsed checks presented by our customers.
Revision:

6. Original Sentence:
Our warranty goes into effect only when we have received the product’s registration card from the
purchaser.
Revision:

7. Original Sentence:
Unfortunately, you will not be able to use our computer and telephone systems on Thursday afternoon
because of upgrades to both systems.
Revision:
8. Original Sentence:
As part of our company effort to be friendly to the environment, we are asking all employees to reduce
paper consumption by communicating by e-mail and avoiding printing.

Revision:

Conversational but Professional: Using the guidelines and examples on pages 46-47 in the text, revise the
following sentences to make the tone conversational yet professional. (Obj. 4)
9. Original Sentence:
Per your recent e-mail, the undersigned takes pride in informing you that we are pleased to be able to
participate in the Toys for Tots drive.
Revision:

10. Original Sentence:


Pursuant to your message of the 15th, please be advised that your shipment was sent August 15.
Revision:

11. Original Sentence:


Yo, Jeff! Look, dude, I need you to sweet talk Ramona so we can drop this budget thingy in her lap.
Revision:

12. Original Sentence:


BTW, Danika was totally ticked off when the manager accused her of ripping off office supplies. She may
split.
Revision:

13. Original Sentence:


He didn’t have the guts to badmouth her 2 her face.
Revision:

14. Original Sentence:


The undersigned respectfully reminds affected individuals that employees desirous of changing their health
plans must do so before November 1.
Revision:
Positive and Courteous Expression: Using the guidelines and examples on pages 47-49 in the text, revise the
following sentences to make them more positive. (Obj. 5)
15. Original Sentence:
Employees are not allowed to use instant messaging until a company policy is established.
Revision:

16. Original Sentence:


We must withhold authorizing payment of your consultant’s fees because of our CPA claims that your work
is incomplete.
Revision:

17. Original Sentence:


Plans for the new health center cannot move forward without full community support.
Revision:

18. Original Sentence:


This is the last time I’m writing to try to get you to record my October 3 payment of $359.50 to my account!
Anyone who can see from the attached documents that I’ve tried to explain this to you before.
Revision:

19. Original Sentence:


Although you apparently failed to read the operator’s manual. We are sending you a replacement blade for
your food processor. Next time ready page 18 carefully so that you will know how to attach this blade.
Revision:

20. Original Sentence:


Everyone is this department must begin using new passwords as of midnight, June 15. Because of flagrant
password misuse, we find it necessary to impose this new rule so that we can protect your personal
information and company records.
Revision:

Bias-Free Language: Using the guidelines and examples on pages 50-51 in the text, revise the following
sentences to reduce gender, racial, ethnic, age, and disability bias. (Obj. 5)
21. Original Sentence:
Every employee must wear his photo identification on the job.
Revision:
22. Original Sentence:
The conference will offer special excursions for the wives of executives.
Revision:

23. Original Sentence:


Does each salesman have his own smartphone loaded with his special sales information?
Revision:

24. Original Sentence:


A little old lady returned this item.
Revision:

25. Original Sentence:


Serving on the panel are a lady veterinarian, an Indian CPA, two businessmen, and a female doctor.
Revision:

26. Original Sentence:


Each nurse is responsible for her patient’s medications.
Revision:

Plain Language and Familiar Words: Using the guidelines and examples on page 51 in the text, revise the
following sentences to use plain language and familiar words. (Obj. 5)
27. Original Sentence:
The salary we are offering is commensurate with remuneration for other managers.
Revision:

28. Original Sentence:


To expedite ratification of this agreement, we urge you to vote in the affirmative.
Revision:

29. Original Sentence:


In a dialogue with the manager, I learned that you plan to terminate our contract.
Revision:

30. Original Sentence:


Did your car’s braking problem materialize subsequent to our recall effort?
Revision:
31. Original Sentence:
Pursuant to your invitation, we will interrogate our agent.
Revision:

Precise, Vigorous Words: Using the guidelines and examples on page 51 in the text, revise the following
sentences to use precise, vigorous words. From the choice in parenthesis, select the most precise, vigorous
words. (Obj. 5)
32. Original Sentence:
Government economists (say, hypothesize, predict) that employment will (stabilize, stay the same, even out)
next year.
Revision:

33. Original Sentence:


The growing number of (people, consumers, buyers) with (devices, gadgets, smartphones) provides an (idea,
indicator, picture) of economic growth.
Revision:

34. Although international trade can (get, offer, generate) new profits and (affect, lower) costs, it also introduces
a (different, higher, new) level of risk and complexity.
Revision:

35. The World Bank sees international trade as a (good, fine, vital) tool for (decreasing, changing, addressing)
poverty.
Revision:

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