Penpal Tips

An Introduction to Penpalling

by Global Penfriends
 GlobalPenfriends.com ©

Getting Started with Snail Mail Penpalling

by Global Penfriends

In the age of social media, many people have forgotten the art of letter writing.
Sure, email and texts are fast and instantaneous but nothing can beat the feeling of
holding a handwritten letter in your hands, knowing about the effort put into creating
a letter. It’s a completely different experience as though you’re with that person and
they have given you a gift in the form of a letter. I know I’m always excited to hear
from my penpals, and I look forward to receiving surprise mail every week, because
with snail mail you don’t know exactly when it will arrive and what surprises might be
inside.

I really believe that letters are more personal compared to emails or texts.
When you send a letter, you are sending something you created with your own
hands, with your own handwriting. You probably also choose the stationery to write
on and perhaps even the stamp. All these either reflect your personality or selected
to please the recipient of your letter.

Some people might say that writing letters takes too much time and effort, but
that is precisely why letter writing is special and why receiving a handwritten letter
sent from halfway across the world with stamps is so much better than receiving an
email. It means you actually took the time to write a letter and the person receiving
the letter feels special because by spending all this time and effort, you are saying
they are worth the time and effort.
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Finding the right pen pal

Before you start penpalling, the first thing you have to do is to find someone to
write to. In my case, I have friends and family who moved to other countries that I
write to regularly, or if you want to learn about another culture and another country,
you can write to someone from that country. You can find potential pen pals through
penpalling websites like www.globalpenfriends.com. But before giving away your
snail mail address, make sure to get to know someone really well first.

The Global Penfriends website is safe to use for all ages and is very family
friendly. For one thing, all profiles are thoroughly checked by site admins to make
sure that users are suitable for penpalling. Anyone with an inappropriate profile is
deleted immediately. The website also performs regular scans to detect scammers
to ensure the safety of its users. What’s great about Global Penfriends is that it also
has an internal messaging system, so you don’t have to give out your email address
or snail mail address to a prospective pen pal in the beginning. You may choose to
do so when you feel more comfortable that your potential pen pal is the right match
for you.

In Global Penfriends, there is a section where people can have profiles

describing themselves, their hobbies, their likes and dislikes. You can find people
with similar interests to yours, so that you can share your love for dubstep, for
example, or pets. I remember when I was looking for pen pals, I would check if they
also liked books, and if we had the same taste in movies. But of course, it’s also
interesting to find out about other things you wouldn’t otherwise know through pen
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pals. One of my pen pals from Luxembourg introduced me to rockabilly music, a

musical genre I wouldn’t otherwise listen to. But we both bonded over our love of
Morissey. Other pen pals would recommend books to read or films to watch. It is
especially interesting when these are books or films from their country because you
get to learn so much more about their culture and history. In other words, it’s really
like you’re being opened to a whole different world through your new friends.

Some pen pals are more prolific than others and can write more letters a week,
and can have more pen pals, but for some people who may be a little busier, it is
probably best to start with just a few pen friends in the beginning. It is really important
to find the right persons to correspond with, so you must choose your pen pals with
care. Here are the questions to consider:

1) Will I have time for a pen pal?

Writing letters can be very time-consuming and takes commitment and

dedication. Before initiating a pen friendship, assess if you will be able to follow
through because penpalling is supposed to be about maintaining communication and
friendship through snail mail so there is an expectation that letters will be exchanged
at least once a month. You and your pen friend may have to discuss how much time
you can devote to writing letters.

But in general, most pen pals are very understanding when it comes to the
length of time that pass between letters, so long as you’re courteous enough to also
explain your side of things. Sometimes life does become a bit busier or you’ve had
to prioritize something else for the time being. What I do is I let my pen friend know
via email that my response might be a little late because I’m busy at work at the
moment.

2 ) What kind of pen pal do I want?

This is also an important consideration because the basis of most pen

friendships are the common hobbies and interests you share. With the Global
Penfriends website, it is easy to find out these things in their profiles. You can also
enter parameters if you prefer to write to people in your age group. As for me, I write
to all sorts of people of all ages. It’s more interesting that way and you learn more.

The answer to this question may also depend on your purpose for wanting to
take up the penpalling hobby. Perhaps you want to learn about a new language or
a new culture. For example, if you’d like to learn Norwegian, you might want to look
for a Norwegian pen pal. There will be someone in the Global Penfriends website
who might be interested in your country and culture as well, or you might have a lot
in common when it comes to your hobbies.
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Other people are also swappers. For example, deltiologists who swap
postcards, or philatelists who collect stamps, or numismatics who collect coins or
bills. You can also find similar people and make swap agreements with them. I know
a girl in Finland who used to swap earrings because she just got her ears pierced,
and a guy who collects pens and T-shirts. Penpalling is a great way to complete your
collection with items from all over the world, and I’m sure it will be the envy of your
friends if you have things from places like Suriname or Tanzania.

Don’t be in a rush to choose your pen pal. There are thousands of members
in www.globalpenfriends.com and one or two of them may just be the perfect pen pal
for you.
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Things You Need for Penpalling

When I started penpalling again, I first scoured all the bookstores in town for
cool stationery and fun things to send to my pen pals. Most bookstores still carry
greeting cards, stationery and letter sets, or if you want, you can also get them online
as I sometimes do. Ever since I’ve revived my penpalling hobby, I’ve noticed that
I’ve been collecting a lot of penpalling supplies, and I make sure to buy stationery
when I’m traveling abroad so I have a great variety to send to various pen friends.
Now I’ve got boxes of stationery, fountain pens, rubber stamps, stickers, seals etc.
But of course, you don’t have to go overboard like me.

Basically all you really need is paper, a pen, an envelope and stamps. You
can even print stationery templates from websites if you prefer. There are lots of free
templates online to choose from. As for me, I really like matching the type of
stationery I use to the person I’m writing to, so I have all kinds with different designs,
floral, or ones with cartoons, or art on them. Your letter is like a gift to a friend, so it
has to look nice and it has to be presentable. And remember, your letter represents
you as well.

I have a pen friend who adds all sorts of decorations like stickers, or decorative
tape, or washi tape to her letters. Her letters are among of my favorites because
she’s so creative with them. She even decorates her envelopes. Her creativity and
obvious joy in decorating her letters like her very own art projects also inspired me to
try and be creative as well. But don’t feel pressured to create a masterpiece with
your letters like my friend does. Different people have different tastes, but it’s also
nice to try new things.

Keep in mind that while decorations are nice, it’s the writing and the content in
your letter that counts the most. Decorations are just an extra, like icing on a cake.
That said, since the writing is the most important, make sure that your penmanship
is legible. If this is a problem, you can type your letters either by typewriter or by
computer. However, some people don’t like typed letters, so it’s best to let your
potential pen friends know if this is all right with them.
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What to write in your first letter

Assuming you’ve already contacted your potential pen friend and have
exchanged addresses, the two of you will usually decide which one will write a letter
first. If you’re the one that has to write the first letter, it is advisable to read your new
friend’s profile and talk about what you have in common based on his or her profile.

After introducing yourself, and perhaps talking about what’s going on in your
life briefly as an opening to your letter, you can dive right in and discuss common
interests. For example, if your new pen friend has listed biking as a hobby, and
assuming it’s also your hobby or something you’re planning to try, you can ask
questions about that, like, “How long have you been riding? What kind of bike do
you have? Where have you biked?” And then you can also share your own
experiences with biking. Perhaps you’re preparing for a race, or organizing a ride for
charity. I’m sure your pen pal would love to hear about that.

Because no two people are exactly alike, there will probably be a few things
where you and your pen pal might differ. You might even choose a person like that
if you prefer because you can learn about a completely different person from a
different country. For example, I’ve always been interested in Art Nouveau, so I have
a pen pal from the Czech Republic, where the artist Alphonse Mucha is from and
where there are a lot of buildings with Art Nouveau architecture. So I often ask my
friend what it’s like to live in a place like that, or what life is like in her country. From
there, you can also share what it’s like in your own country.
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We also might celebrate holidays differently in every country, so it’s always

interesting to read about someone else’s experience or traditions and also share your
country’s customs. Having a person from a different country talk about their lives is
much deeper and more meaningful than reading about it on Wikipedia.

If you happen to be learning a different language, you can also mention that to
your new friend and they might even help you learn a new language. For example,
I’ve been trying to learn Russian, so a pen friend would sometimes help me with a
few difficult phrases and idioms, and explain where they come from or their history.

Another possible topic to discuss are your jobs, or what you’re studying at
school or the events at school if you’re a student, but it’s not necessary to make it
too personal, especially for the first letter. For example, when you discuss your job,
a general description will do, and maybe add a few details about what you do during
the day.

In the beginning of a pen friendship, most of the discussions I have with my

pen pals revolve around TV shows, films, books and music. So perhaps you may
discuss favorite TV shows or films, and get recommendations from each other. For
instance, my Czech pen pal is a big Doctor Who fan and told me all about the
program, and I ended up really liking the series too. Sometimes we’d have different
reactions to films, so it’s also good to discuss what we think worked, or what didn’t,
and this way we end up learning a lot from each other by reading about another
person’s perspective.
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Making sure that your letters arrive

So you’ve written your letter and now it’s time to send it. But all your hard work
might be for nothing if the letter doesn’t even reach your pen pal. Take note of the
following tips to help ensure that your letters arrive safely and securely at their
intended destination.

1) Make sure you have the correct name and address.

Check that you have written the name and address of your pen pal correctly
onto the envelope. If you wish, you can print it out with a sticker label, or paste it
onto the envelope to make sure it’s readable. Also, remember those envelopes from
the letters of your pen pals? Sometimes the addresses are written there, so if you
cannot find the address of your pen pal, you can check the envelope. But to be really
sure, message your pen pal to confirm their address.

What I do is keep all the addresses of my pen friends in an excel file. I also
had an address book before, but sometimes they move around so much that I have
to keep crossing out addresses. It’s much more convenient to have a copy in your
computer. That way, you are can also note when you send a letter or when you
receive a letter from your pen pals to track them.

You have to make sure that you write the address correctly. If there’s a street
number, do include it. The zip code or post code and the country is also important,
and I learned that a few years ago when I once made a mistake with a letter I sent.
For some reason, I got confused and wrote Germany instead of Austria for a friend’s
address. I think the letter is lost forever in a post office somewhere in Germany,
which is too bad, because I had collected Harry Potter postcards for this friend and
now she will never receive them.

Another reason why including the post code is important is that in some
countries, the post office might not process letters with missing post codes. If you
cannot understand the address that someone has sent to you, you can take the
original envelope you received to the post office and ask the post office workers to
decipher it for you. The post office workers are usually very good at deciphering
handwriting and are familiar with international addresses, probably from having to
deliver so many letters or postcards with somewhat illegible handwriting.
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2) Seal your envelopes securely.

If your letter has more than ten pages, you can tape the flap to keep it secure.
While we’re at it, to make sure that your letter makes the journey safely, you can also
tape the sides of the envelope, just in case.

3) Use airmail stickers.

When sending mail overseas, you will need to affix an airmail or par avion
sticker to your letter. The post office gives these away for free. Alternatively, you
can also print an airmail logo on sticker paper, and then stick them onto the
envelopes. You can even add the airmail logo on your envelopes if you’re using a
printer to print out your envelopes. You can also just write Airmail on your letters if
you don't use a printer and cannot find the appropriate sticker at your post office

4) Send your letter with the correct amount of postage.

When sending letters to friends all over the world, you must pay by weight. If
your letter is more than a couple of sheets of normal paper, it is always a good idea
to weigh the letter at your post office first. The post office worker will then tell you
how much you should pay in postage to send the letter to the country of your choice.
The post office should be able to provide you with a listing of prices and weights to
different countries or regions.

Another option is sending letters via registered mail. This is more expensive
than regular post, but if you want to make sure that the recipient will receive your
letter, you might want to consider registered mail. Some postal systems sometimes
such as those in Algeria, Morocco, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Russia and Seychelles take
longer to distribute mail. Keep this in mind and be patient when awaiting post from
these countries.
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OTHER TIPS

1) Make your letters a little bit more special.

There are a number of ways to make your letters unique. You can add
character to your envelope by decorating it. You can add doodles, stickers, or make
the entire envelope out of gift wrap, add pictures, glitter or sequins. Just make sure
the address is clear and is easily found and read by the postal worker.

You can also create your own stationery if you don’t like any of the templates
available online, or if you feel that what’s available in stores does not reflect your
personality. You can make the letter itself colorful by using different colored pens or
markers. Maybe you’d like to write every other line in a different color, highlight some
words you want to emphasize with color, etc.

You can even use hieroglyphics in your letter. For example, you can draw the
word instead of spelling it out, or substitute some letters with pictures, like a drawing
of an eye for the letter. Just use your imagination... the possibilities are endless!

2) You can also add a few little extra things to your letter.

A fun thing to do can be clipping an interesting article or headline from the

day’s newspaper. Maybe you were featured in the local paper? Cut out the clipping
and add it to your envelope. You can also add other bits and pieces of flat things like
candy or gum. It would be nicer if it’s candy that can only be bought in your country.
A friend from the Netherlands once sent me licorice, which is her favorite. It wasn’t
anything like the licorice I’ve had before, and I suppose it’s an acquired taste, but it
was certainly interesting to try! You can also include interesting tags from a shop,
pin buttons or flyers for a concert or show. I use them as bookmarks and I think
they’re really cool because they traveled nearly halfway around the world to find
themselves in between the pages of my books.

One of the fun things about having a pen pal is you can show off your country
to your new friend. Why don’t you choose a postcard that reflects a major attraction
in your city? If your city doesn't have a major attraction, perhaps choose another
favorite place in your country, or send a map of your country. I myself love maps and
I am always happy to add a new one to my collection.

Speaking of flat things, what about tea bags, or instant coffee mixes from your
country? As long as they’re flat, it would be no problem at all. Maybe you want to
send a bookmark, or samples of your photography, or photos from your vacation, or
maybe a dried leaf you picked up somewhere in your area, or maybe a keychain.
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You can send your pen pal stickers that reflect your country, your interests or
hobbies. International pen pals love to receive stickers that have your country’s flag
or symbols on them. Same goes for patches they can sew on clothing or bags.

Another fun thing to send are CDs from local artists in your country, especially
if it’s folk music and truly unique to your country, with songs sung in your language
and accompanied by ethnic musical instruments. Your pen pals would probably
never have access to this type of music unless they become world famous.

Some of my pen pals are writers too, so if they write in English, they send their
poems or short stories so I can read them and comment on them. If you like a poem
or a song, you can print the lyrics and send them to your pen pal too.

I have also received some things in the mail that I didn’t think could be sent
through the mail. For example, I have received books, fortune cookies, chocolate (it
sort of melted, but it was great), a wood carving of my name, matryoshka or Russian
dolls... which was very exciting for me. Since then I’ve also been more adventurous
and sent things like pencils, a coin purse with coins from my country, small paintings
(I occasionally dabble in art), a bracelet I made, a wooden letter opener, or a scarf.

Once I even sent a little elephant plushie in my letter to a friend in the

Netherlands. He loves elephants. Another friend from France spent the holiday at
the beach, so he sent me a couple of postcards from that region and very tiny shells
with some sand in a ziplock bag. I showed it to my niece, and she also thought it
was the coolest thing ever. It’s moments like these when I realize what an amazing
hobby penpalling is. And when you do little extra stuff like this, it’s even better. It’s
so simple and takes so little effort but it can really make someone happy.

But keep in mind that while it’s fun and exciting to send little items to your
friends via post, one shouldn’t feel obligated to send gifts, and in the same way, one
should not expect gifts from pen pals. Of course there are exceptions, such as if you
had an agreement to swap, but there’s risk involved, and it is possible that your pen
pal might not fulfill his or her end of the bargain, so proceed with caution. If you like
sending gifts, that’s really great, but keep in mind that expensive or inappropriate
gifts may embarrass your pen pal.

I do think it is OK to send cards on a special occasion like a birthday, or a

holiday like Christmas. But check first if they celebrate Christmas or if they don’t
mind receiving Christmas cards. Since we are writing to friends all over the world,
we must be sensitive about other people’s culture and beliefs. That said, this is a
great opportunity to learn about their culture, as well as share your culture with other
people.
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3) Consider renting a postbox at your post office.

If you’re worried that your mail might be tampered with, you might want to look
into renting your own box at the post office. These normally rent out for a nominal
amount per month or year. You might also have security and privacy concerns and
might prefer not want to give out your real address to your pen pals, in which case,
a private postbox might be a good idea.

One Last Note - Snail mail penpalling is truly a rewarding hobby and gives you
a chance to make friends with people all over the world. It is also an easy and
inexpensive way of spreading love and happiness. Now that you know all about how
to start snail mail penpalling from finding the right penpal, getting snail mail supplies,
knowing what to write in your letters, and making sure your letters are sent, what are
you waiting for? Go ahead and find your new pen pals at www.globalpenfriends.com.
Imagine the feeling of your pen pals as they receive snail mail from you. People will
be charmed and flattered to get a new letter from you in their mailbox. Handwritten
letters are very special and are very rare treats these days. Share your stories and
your dreams, and make it a personal goal to send more snail mail this year. Now, Iʼm
off to get started on a few letters of my own.
And remember, keep on writing, and most of all, have fun!