MOVIE REVIEW: DEAR ZINDAGI (2016)

1. Describe the initial attitude of Kaira before the therapy began.

Kaira was a Director with a natural talent of filming, who wants to reach the peak of success at a
young age. She choses to break free of her parents and stay alone in the city of Mumbai. Before the
therapy began Kaira was a moody girl who does not take life seriously. She doesn’t want to talk to her
parents at the phone for too long, reasoning that she was busy. She was self-centered and with her friends
she sometimes shows that she is not interested with their life and feelings. She also doesn’t think before
she talks and later be guilty on what she did.
It’s a very realistic depiction of how in today’s times, people engage in a pattern of avoidance,
escape and displacing feelings. In the scene, where she breaks a bottle in a store, strong metaphors
indicate how she was hurt and is a camouflaged by this overt act of aggression. The act of eating a chili to
numb her feelings of pain when she hears about Kunal Kapoor’s engagement symbolically represents her
self-destructive behavior, aimed at shifting the emotional pain to a physical sensation which also induces
tears.
She can’t handle a romantic relationship because she has difficulty expressing herself. After
exposing to problems on her Landlord and Raghuvendra, she came back to Goa where her parents are and
her extended family wants her to settle down into a proper job and get married after that day she find
trouble sleeping which is what finally drives her to see a therapist.

2. Describe the approach of the therapist towards Kaira. Do you think the therapist manifested a professional
behavior? How?
During therapy, she slowly opens her problems in her life. With the use of the therapist’s engaging
stories and carefree attitude, she peels off Kaira’s worries layer by layer, helping her discover the core of
her problems. However, the main problem with the movie is how they have presented an idealized version
of therapy and missed out on the value of professional boundaries which is the foundation of a therapeutic
relationship. The therapist who holds sessions on the beach while cycling and on a ferry is not
professional at all. He asks a lot of Why questions, listens, but is quick to advise and present his own
perspective. The process of therapy is about enabling clients to find their own answers, by helping them
get in touch with their feelings and trusting their inner voice. In reality, clients take a long time to process
their feelings of hurt or abandonment and need to make their own choices about how to resolve these
feelings. It is this exact process which prevents them from becoming dependent on the therapist. Which is
why informal verbal and nonverbal cues which the therapist uses in the movie create the perception where
the client starts seeing him as her friend.
The most problematic part was the ending, the therapist cancels the session at the last minute
without informing Kaira, and then in the next session announces that the following session will be their
last session. It was unprofessional that it’s not taken into consideration that a client who is struggling with
abandonment, may not be prepared for abruptly terminating her therapy sessions or to handle future life
situations.
We don’t want clients pursuing therapy in the hope that therapy is a quick fix, where therapists
give advice and enlighten you with wisdom. It is the client who chooses his path and leads the therapy
process, while the therapist plays the role of facilitator. All of us like Kaira, are capable of finding our
own meaning in life.

3. Cite the situations where the different stages (Orientation, Identification, Exploitation, Termination) where
reflected.

Orientation
The orientation phase defines the problem. It starts when the nurse meets the patient, and the two
are strangers. Building a safe environment and providing privacy for the client is important. In the 1 st
and 2nd session they discussed the problem in a close room where they are just the two of them. The
therapist introduced himself and then asked the patient if he can call her Kaira. Kaira says that she has
trouble sleeping and even if she takes pills it isn’t working. The therapist makes a joke that the judge
hammer was the one he used to help them sleep. Building rapport in a fun way can be useful but the
patient may think that you are not interested in them if you are not serious at the first place. Building
rapport in the orientation phase is also important and the strategy of the therapist was through telling
stories and examples that can helped the client to open up. Essentially, the orientation phase is the
nurse’s assessment of the patient’s health and situation. On their third session, the therapist permits their
 session in the ocean in which there is no professionalism shows in it because the privacy of the patient is
not secured in an open area.

Identification

In the identification phase, the patient begins to feel as if he or she belongs, and feels capable of
dealing with the problem which decreases the feeling of helplessness and hopelessness. The therapist
later identifies the problem of the patient by asking questions and engaging her to talk. He then asked
Kaira questions if she has any change in her life and why she moved to Goa. Kaira stated that she came
to Goa because of her friend who has issues with a guy and tell the problem of “her friend”. As the
therapist builds rapport, Kaira admitted that she was the one who has the issue with the guy and not her
friend. On the 2nd part of her session she also said that she has a dream in which she was on a
construction site and was about to fall on the highest floor and when she falls down she fall on the dirt
and no one helped her. Many women with a wedding gown circling her and laughing at her. As the
session go through, Kaira is more open in sharing her problems to the therapist.

Working
In the 2nd session, the therapist makes an example about his “chair theory” where the process of
choosing a chair is long and has many options. After that Kaira figured out and solved the meaning on
her dream. In the fifth session, when Kaira started to tell her whole story about her problem in life as a
child she have cry and let it all out. The therapist is just there actively listening and using silence to
make her feel that he is just there. In this Phase problems and issues are identified and plan to address
these are put into action. After she has let it out, the therapist stated that “to feel safe, first the fears have
to go”. The fear of being abandoned that Kaira has experienced and carried this burden is falling or
affecting her other relationships to people. When the therapist identifies the problem, he started to say
that because she never wants to face that pain again, she leaves others first before they leave her.
However, the patient must be the one who will have the self-reflection and not the therapist who will
state that why not let the fear go. It is not therapeutic but the movie portrays that Kaira shows the
decrease feeling of hopelessness as she is now capable in dealing and working with her problem.

Termination
The ending phase is the final stage of the nurse-client relationship. After Kaira’s problem and issues are
addressed, the relationship needs to be completed before it can be terminated. Both of them share
feelings related to the ending of their therapeutic relationship when Kaira do not wanted it to be the last
session because she started to like the therapist. The therapist explained that they cannot be but this is a
positive reaction for Kaira because she started to open up her feelings to others and she making a
progress. At the end Kaira accepted it and thanked the therapist for all the things he done.

4. Give at least five (5) therapeutic communication techniques utilized by the therapist for Kaira. Describe how
those techniques were used, and mention the scenarios where those parts were depicted.
 Using Silence
o The absence of verbal communication is also therapeutic and the therapist let Kaira to cry,
open up her wounds in the past and later get back to her senses when she let it out. The
therapist used only silence and listen to Kaira in the last part of her session.
 (Dun sa restating and Seeking Information di ko gets kung saan included yung example
situation)hehheeh
 Restating
o Repeating the main idea that Kaira expressed
 Seeking Information
o When Kaira on the first session, talks about her friend with an issue with a guy and she don’t
know what to say to her but “Shup up and say no, do you have self-respect?” then later the
therapist clarifies if that issue is affecting her not to sleep and kept awake all night whether to
tell her friend to shut or not. The therapist search which statement of her was clear and
vague.
 Giving Recognition
 o During the 2nd session, when Kaira dreamt about the costruction site and share it to the
therapist. The therapist gives a example for chair where there are different choices to choose
which chair is the right for us and then Kaira figured out for herself and the therapist give her
recognition by saying “it’s good, you figured it out by yourself”
 Reflecting
o Kaira stated that she has trouble sleeping and even if she drinks pill nothing happens then
later the therapist asked if there is a major change in her life that is when Kaira start to assess
her own self-reflecting. This is a direct question about the thoughts, feelings, and actions of
the client. It is making them aware what they need to do and what causes their negative
emotions.
o On the 4th session the therapist asked Kaira “who is the 5 cups in your life?” and it made
Kaira think and finger count her friends and Kiddo his brother. The therapist asked again
“what do you feel when with the?”, she said that she feels special, respected, important,
happy and safe.
 Offering Hope and Humor
o The therapist of Kaira has a great humor and has a carefree attitude. He utilized it during
their first session, where he makes jokes about helping Kiara to sleep using a judge hammer.
He also uses stories throughout all the session to make an example to lighten the mood with
humor and help Kaira realizes reflection of one self. Like when he asked Kaira what is her
fear and he said broken things can be put back together. With this technique can help keep
patients in a more positive state of mind.

5. Give at least five (5) defense mechanism which were used by Kaira; explain how Kaira have executed those
defense mechanisms, and the scenarios in the movie where the defense mechanisms were shown.

6. Based on the character of Kaira, do you agree that human behavior is caused? How and why?
Human behavior is the capability, potential and ability that is expressed (mentally, physically, and
socially) by individuals to respond to internal and external stimuli throughout their life. We think that
human behavior is caused with the internal and external stimuli or the environment. When Kaira was left
by her parents in her grandparent’s care, she felt abandoned and was deprived of the love of her parents.
When they took her to her grandparents, she was angry at them because she just started to feel comfortable
without her parents then she was took away. She feels lost and she was known for being a brat and a crazy
kid. Only knows to cry, growl and complain not knowing that she was building wall to herself. Kaira
experienced unexpected series of personal and professional failures that put a halt to her thriving career.
Insomnia and family pressure to find a husband drive Kaira to suffer from anxiety and possible
depression. Her difficulty expressing herself and avoidance and escape of feelings is the caused of the
environment that she has experienced. When she wants to enter a relationship, she will the first one to say
goodbye before being outrun. That is her mindset. The fear of being abandoned that Kaira has experienced
and carried this burden is affecting her other relationships to people.

7. In Erik-Erikson’s Psychosocial Stages of Development, Kaira was fixated at particularly what stage of
development? Explain.

8. Kaira’s problem is rooted in which of the following: ID, EGO, or SUPEREGO? Why? Do you think this is
related to her level of self-awareness? Justify.

We think that Kaira’s problem is rooted

9. What could be the possible role of Kaira’s family in her psychotherapy? Discuss.

10. The goal of family therapy is to help family members improve communication, solve family problems,
understand and handle special family situations (for example, death, serious physical or mental illness, or
child and adolescent issues), and create a better functioning home environment. If you are a psychiatric
nurse, how will you handle Kaira’s behavior? Answer this question by selecting a scene of Kaira and Dr.
Khan, and do short re-enactment of that scenario with your partner. CHALLENGE: Make sure that the way
you will handle KAIRA is BETTER than what was done by Dr. Khan.
GRADING CRITERIA:
ANSWERS TO CRITICAL THINKING QUESTIONS (Perfect Score is 72/72)
(Note: Scoring is per question)
• IF with completely correct explanation: 4 pts
• IF explanation is correct but needs further elaboration/clarification - 3 pts
• IF some parts of the explanation are correct but some are erroneous, conceptually and
technically - 2 pts
• IF all explanations are wrong/irrelevant -1pt

Raghuvendra want to take their relationship seriously but Kaira seems to show him that
she didn’t care at all and she is not interested if Raghuvendra is going to see his ex-girlfriend.
She then realizes that she is jealous and when she heard the news of him getting engaged, she
feels suffocated and another problem arises when her landlord turns her out saying only married
couples can stay in the apartment. She then came to Goa, to her parents house.

After exposing to problems on her apartment and Raghuvendra she came back to Goa and
then later on met her therapist.