Elaine Young

www.thetantricshaman.com

What is Mindful Self Pleasuring?

The inability to focus your attention on your own aliveness is a lack of freedom.
Some individuals are so unaware of their bodies they cannot even tune into their
own heartbeat. This is an appalling lack of freedom. The inability to sexually excite
one’s self through movement and sensuous touch is a lack of freedom. The
inability to move—even dance—while sexually aroused is a lack of freedom. The
need for an individual to use imagery outside of self in order to get sexually
aroused is a lack of freedom.

Look at your current ‘practice’

How often?
Why?
Where?
How long?
How satisfying is it ?
What would you like to change?
Do you always use fantasy or imagery/ porn
Do you touch yourself in a variety of ways
Do you feel distracted?
Do you feel shame?
Do you feel it has to be quick?
Have you ever experience a spiritual feeling?
Do you feel nourished satisfied by your masturbation?
Are you aware of your breath?
Do you use different positions, move /dance?

Mindful Self Pleasuring/ Orgasmic Yoga Check List

First set up the space, make sure you will not be disturbed, light candles, some
incense, select music, make a beautiful space to lie down in, if you wish to have
sensual fabrics, feathers, toys.
Every session includes the following:

1. A statement of intention(s) at the beginning.

2. A clear beginning and ending time.

3. A session structure, outline or choreography. HAVE A SIMPLE PLAN

 4. One or more minutes of Kegels. PC muscles (pee muscles squeezes)

5. Conscious breathing patterns –

use both and alternate up-regulating (fast circular breathing and charging
breaths) and then some slow down regulating breaths (slow deep signs and
breathing deep and slow directly the energy towards the anus). JUST USE
CONSCIOUS BREATHING NORMAL PACE FOR NOW OR CHOOSE ONE
BREATH

6. Self touch- your whole body first and then include your genitals. Use and
alternate different fast . slow, massaging, stretching , highly stimulating etc

7. Movement, stretching, and/or dancing. Move your body, rock/circle your

hips, shake you hands and feet, arch your back. THIS MAY BE ROCKING
PELVIS AND SHAKING ONLY FOR NOW.

8. Sounds, moans and laughter. Get your throat active make sound throughout
if possible

9. Quiet for the last five minutes of each session. It is crucial that you rest
quietly for at least five minutes at the end of your session, to simply be and
breathe. This is similar to the yogic practice of savasana.

10. Reflection and note-taking after each session.

Questions for Journaling/Reflection

Reflection & Journaling

Do not judge – wherever you are is ok?

Did you experience resistance (or frozenness) before beginning
or during any Orgasmic Yoga practice sessions?
If so, what forms did that resistance take?
Were you distracted during your sessions?
Were there repeated distractions?
Describe your body states during your practice.

Please note any other surprises, inhibitions, strong emotions,

insights, and/or frustrations that you encountered before or during
your sessions.

What do you sense that you need from future practice sessions?

Note any distractions or roadblocks. Describe your feeling states.

Benefits & Challenges of OYP

Benefits

To feel & to re-connect to their body

as a source of wisdom,
happiness.
Greater Embodiment
Pleasure
• Greater freedom
• Greater aliveness & pleasure
• Greater flow and interconnectedness
• Greater relaxation and alertness

Challenges

• Presence
• Old and habitual patterns
• Shame
• Genital hole – many people cannot connect to feel their genitals
• Distraction
• Resistance

Mirror practice OYP

The fact that so many people are repulsed or would never dare to talk or think
about masturbating passionately and lovingly in front of a mirror is an indication of
its power. The veil is shame. Shame is powerful; it is a door. Where you feel
embarrassment, you are holding back energy. Shame is the map to your strength.

Go through the door and find out what is on the other side. In any aspect of
sexuality, the stronger the shame, the more pleasure, freedom, liberation and
power it conceals. Sexual shame conceals a deeper shame of being alive. Often a
great well of guilt is veiled as "a little guilt," and I suggest you explore this
possibility. If you have any lingering traces of resistance or guilt around your
existence, here is where you'll uncover them, and where you're likely to let them go
- in front of a mirror.

Breathwork

Breath; breath helps the mind open, and release its anxieties. Breath happens
unconsciously yet can be controlled by our conscious minds; breath is a bridge.
Breathing fully, we engage the muscles of the pelvic floor and stimulate the genital
nerves. Breath can be erotic and joyful.

Why is it important …presence ,deep belly breathing leads to physiological

relaxation and sexual energy is available, moves energy around the body and
allows more positive energy to be held, allows us to feel our emotions and body
messages.

Up Regulating - Build energy

Fast breath normal breath
Fire Breath – collapse chest and abdomen on out breath completely empty your
lungs, let go and let in breath flood in with no effort.
Charging breath 2 sniffs up nose fast (or in through mouth )and fast out breath

Circular breath – equal volume in and out breath, circular lose the gap between the
in and out breath …. Allows up to stay the same or up regulate if done quickly.
Down Regulating – relaxing , bring down energy levels
Bottom breath - relaxes tension, inhale fully into belly at the bottom/end of the in
breath push down on your perineum, pelvic floor, ‘anus kissing the floor’ or
visualize the breath coming in and out of your anus, relax let go and do nothing on
the exhale. It may help to clench PC muscles a little to start with to gauge the
connection.

Straw breath . round pursed lips deep slow breath in and out of mouth.

Heart /deep sign breath – effort on in breath let out breath fall or with sigh or
sound.

Sound
Play with sound
notice tone vary volume\humming
sound releases emotions energy
sound moves energy
actives throat chakra

Movements

Dance yoga, stretching, shaking, aching back rocking pelvis, pelvis circles, jiggling
hands and feet, anus and mouth, pc squeezes

Types of touch

Types of touch variety ? on someone else

Holding/cupping
Light feathery touch
Scratching
Kneading
stretching
hair tugging

Punching
pinching
Holding/cupping
Light feathery touch
Scratching
Kneading
stretching
hair tugging
slapping
stroking
firm press/hold

You might want to add silk, fur, feathers

Thanks to Ed remember mouth touch options….. licking , sucking , blowing

Feel yourself …. As the Lover & Beloved how good does it feel to touch you? How
good does it feel to be touched by you? Allow yourself to feel yourself giving and
really importantly allow yourself to feel the receiving.

Penis/Cock Massage Stokes

Remember all the time breathing, changing your breaths to move energy, move
your body, pelvic tilts , back arching , shaking, shaking hands and feet and making
sound

Soft
Slap on body
Bend in half
Cupping up and down

Around the clock- good for soft or semi erect

Stretch /stroke the penis/cock to the side, left, right and then up and down you
want to cup with your hand and stroke, stretch and massage.

Cock Shiatsu – good for soft

Massage deeply the tissues of the shaft on both sides with our fingers

Massage the frenulum on the tip of the light consistent strokes – soft or hard

Corona .. go around the rim of the corona, or hold thumb and finger as a ring.

Fire Rub and roll the cock/penis between the palms of you hand – soft or hard

Faster
Hold the base with on hand around like a ring twisting the head of penis
You can add in massage of the shaft

Stretching penis one hand on way and stretching scrotum the other way

Balls
Scratching
Stretching scrotum
Gently massage testicles

Yoni/Vulva
Remember all the time breathing, changing your breaths to move energy , move
your body, pelvic tilts , back arching , shaking, shaking hand and feet and making
sound

Outer Vulva Massage

Touch all of the body first..
Touch around the pelvis, inner lower thighs, lower stomach
Glides, long strokes , circles , vibrations, holding

Not in any particular order mix it up….

Massage with kneading the outer lips

Massage with stretching the outer lips
Same for inner lips be gentle
Squashing the outer and inner lips
Stroking up and down with two or three fingers in a V shape over and around the
clitoris and bulbs
Doorbell tap or vibration on the clitoris
Massage around the vaginal opening circles etc do not enter at this stage
Figure of 8 around the clitoris and vaginal opening
Holding and cupping genitals (you can add heart holding with other hand)
Hair tugging
Circles around the clitoris .. 2pm spot explore
play with speed and pressure , see what works and see what you like

Inside Vagina
Enter 1 finger and hold be in stillness and FEEL physical and emotions
Go to (U) urethral /g spot sponge and map it out around the edges find the front,
back and gutters at the side , massage the whole sponge and notice if is becomes
fuller/thicker
Circles and side way strokes on U sponge, tapping, vibrating, pressing firmly and
holding , press and let go, play with speed and pressure see what works and see
what you like
Explore the side walls and back of the vagina, stokes, press, notice any pain (if
pain hold the point breathe into it and see if pain goes away try 3 or 4 times, notice
if any numbness and if so trace and touch around the area)
Put inside your thumb and press down to reach the perineal sponge.. hold, press,
stroke , vibrate

The Genital Hole.

Lack of physical sensation, checking out emotionally during sex, boring and routine
sex lives, pain during arousal, guilt and shame, the need to fantasize or watch porn
to become aroused, and many other typical erotic roadblocks are often indicators
of genital numbness. Another indicator may be the inability to have any memory of
good sex. You may remember the participant(s) but not the feeling states.
Genital Hole. Lack of physical sensation, checking out emotionally during sex,
boring and routine sex lives, pain during arousal, guilt and shame, the need to
fantasize or watch porn to become aroused, and many other typical erotic
roadblocks are often indicators of genital numbness. Another indicator may be the
inability to have any memory of good sex. You may remember the participant(s)
but not the feeling states.

The tragedy of the Genital Hole is that most individuals are not even aware that
they have a diminished capacity for feeling pleasure. The numbing of the
neurology of the genitals and surrounding areas is almost always unconscious.
Mindful masturbation educates about the placement of attention on physical
sensations rather than going away from the body via fantasy or imagery. Those
that seek out sex education are often ready to experience a fuller range of sexual
feelings and possibilities. Learning to savor sensation is the antidote to the Genital
Hole.

The most telling window into the experience of the Genital Hole is examining how
we masturbate. How we touch ourselves to enjoy sexual arousal is directly related
to our personal embodied beliefs and conditioning about sexuality, pleasure and
our genitals. Almost all individuals learn to tense their bodies when they
masturbate. This physical script is often formed around the time of puberty and can
create a lifelong physiological pattern that limits feeling. No wonder many folks
report that masturbation is boring, shameful, or unrewarding. An astonishing
number of individuals masturbate unconsciously and without much awareness of
the body.

What are the results of masturbating mindfully? What happens when we start
paying attention to the feeling states of our entire body as we become aroused?
How can we begin to unlearn chronic constrictions and thaw out years of genital
numbness? Can masturbation foster a sense of creativity and freedom? Is it
possible that by changing the way we masturbate, we can change the way we
experience our entire bodies?

First of all master the basic self pleasuring session for yourself and then you can
add and play with some of the more advanced options below.

ORGASMIC YOGA MEDTIATIONS

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #1: Heart Pleasuring

What if young people, especially pre-teens, learned about masturbation as a

spiritual practice from their parents and from their religious traditions?

Quodoushka teacher Harley Swiftdeer advocates educating young folks in the

practice of generating intense energy in their genitals and then raising that energy
up through the body to their hearts. This tradition teaches young folks that
masturbating results in having orgasms in your heart. This “Heart Pleasuring” is
quite different from “having a wank.”

It takes years to learn to block one’s sexual energy from connecting with one’s
heart energy. When children are taught to fear sexual feelings, they learn to
constrict muscles and learn to release their sexual excitement as quickly as
possible. By making masturbation a sin, religions gain control over individuals from
an early age. When you control people’s sexuality, you control their whole life. This
learned separation of the heart from the genitals is the central tragedy of Western
sex education.

You are invited to spend this whole month channeling your sexual arousal into
your heart. Let every caress, every stroke celebrate everyone and every thing you
are connected with. Heart Pleasuring can easily be integrated into other Orgasmic
Yoga meditations.
Cherokee teacher Ina Laughing Winds offers some very specific instructions for
Heart Pleasuring. The masturbator should clench the pelvic floor muscles with
each breath, visualizing the heart pulling erotic energy up from the genitals.
Laughing Winds says that by pleasuring our hearts, we become aware of “our
relationship to everything. Our relationship to other humans, to other animals, to
the plant world, the mineral world, the spirit world.” In this approach to
masturbating, we are making love to the whole world.

Finish this meditation lying on the floor with five minutes of stillness.

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation # 2: Gently Resting Genitals

Orgasmic Yoga is a mindfulness practice. This means we place part of our

attention on our practice and part on our intention to practice. In this meditation,
you can assess your genital sensations/numbness, as well as your ability to be
focused/distracted.

The Gently Resting Genital Meditation is practiced without activating sexual

arousal. We place our attention on our genitals first through imagination, then
through breath, and finally through touch.

Choose to sit or stand. Craft your intention. Notice how you value and/or resist this
specific meditation. (For example, this might be your most profound learning in the
whole course.)

Without touching yourself, bring your conscious awareness to your genital area.
On a scale of one to ten, what is your genital awareness score? As you go through
this meditation, you may wish to compare changes on the awareness scale.

Part I: Spend a few minutes paying attention to your genital geography. Try turning
on an internal sense: gaze, hearing or feeling. When you become distracted,
gently bring your awareness back to your genitals.

Part II: Now spend a few minutes breathing to awaken genital sensation. Inhale
and exhale through your genitals. Relax constrictions with each breath. Nourish all
of the cells in your pelvic realm with O2.

Part III: Let your attention be guided by your hand cupping your genitals. For a few
minutes, experiment with various pressures, touches and vibrations. You can also
expand your touch into a genital massage.

Notice sparks in the genitals that might evolve into arousal. Do you feel any pull
from familiar arousal patterns? If you choose to become aroused or arousal
happens beyond your choice, you may wish to come back to this meditation
another time.

In the final minutes of your meditation, reflect on your experience. Consider what
distractions and difficulties inhibited your focus of attention. Welcome any changes
in your genital awareness into your day.

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #3: Exploring the Land Down Under

The world would be a better place if more humans massaged and played with their
assholes. Orgasmic Yoga offers you the opportunity to develop a new relationship
with your pelvis, especially your anus. If you are not connected to this pleasurable
and intelligent part of your body, Orgasmic Yoga invites you to take your asshole
on a date—a date that includes sexual arousal.

Anxieties centering on hygiene are the major inhibition to self anal touch. So the
shower might be a good place to begin any anal body meditation. Jack Morin’s
revolutionary guidebook, Anal Pleasure and Health, suggests inserting a finger in
your anus every time you take a shower. Some yogis include anal clenches and
pushes with their self anal massage with astonishing results. Might this simple
practice change your sex life?

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #4: Pelvic Floor Workout

There are numerous exercises that tone the weave of muscles that comprise the
pelvic floor. These muscles surrounding the genitals and anus are also known as
the PC (pubococcygeal) muscles. This weave of muscles is so crucial to sexual
health and pleasure that it should be exercised every day—forever. There are
three basic exercises, developed by Dr. Arnold Kegel, for experiencing and toning
the pelvic floor.

l. Slow Clench: Squeeze the muscles of your pelvic floor (PC muscles) as if
you were stopping the flow of urine. Do this as you inhale slowly. Relax those
muscles as you breathe out. Notice especially your anal sphincter muscles
clenching and relaxing with each breath. Vary this exercise by clenching your
PC muscles as you exhale, and consciously relaxing on your inhale.
Experiment to see how these variations feel in your body.

2. Flutter: Clench and release the PC muscles with quick panting breaths. Play
with the clench both on the inhale and on the exhale. Be sure to let your breath
fall out rather than forcing it out. Some folks are good at clenching PC muscles
but have difficulty relaxing them. You can monitor the release of pelvic muscles
by inserting a finger in your anus.

3. Push Down: This exercise gently pushes the pelvic floor down. This push
may also involve your abdominal muscles. Some folks may feel anxiety doing
this exercise. This movement is used for defecation.

You can create your own pelvic floor workouts by varying these three exercises.
Explore differences in rhythm, depth, strength, and duration.
The elevator choreography is a structure that allows you to play with all three
Kegel exercises. Pretend you are on an elevator, going up. Start with a gentle
tightening of the pelvic floor. This is the 2nd floor. Then relax and imagine that you
are going back down to the 1st floor. Go up the elevator again. As you reach the
2nd floor, tighten your pelvic floor muscles as before. Take it even further to the
3rd floor and tighten the muscles tighter. Then go back to the 2nd floor and then
the 1st floor (relaxed). Continue this process up to the 5th floor, contracting your
pelvic floor muscles tighter and tighter as you "go higher" in the elevator. At any
floor you can stop and step off the elevator by holding the contraction of that floor.
After you have looked around, get back on and continue by stopping at each floor
on your way up or down. There is something interesting in the basement. Check
out the basement by pushing down the pelvic floor. Play on the elevator as long as
you want.

We recommend integrating the pelvic floor movements into your Orgasmic Yoga
sessions. You will also benefit by doing these exercises in non-erotic situations.
Try a hundred a day of each variation. Placing your attention on the movements is
as important as doing the movements.

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #5: Erotic Metta

This Orgasmic Yoga meditation directs loving kindness to one’s self and to then
out to others. The intense physicality of sexual arousal provides a powerful
foundation for these affirmations of love for self and love for others. Begin this
meditation by placing your attention into your chest area while caressing your body
into an aroused state.

Focus your attention on your heartbeat. Breathe while being present to the
sensations in your chest and the sensations in your genitals.

It is now time to speak into your heart, "May I be peaceful." Breathe these words
again and again into your heart. Breathe these words into your genitals. Eventually
breathe, “May I be peaceful” to all parts of your body. Let your whole somatic being
“be at peace.”

Continue your breathing and your self-erotic caressing.

It is now time to speak a second phrase into your heart: "May I be happy." Breathe
in this prayer. And then breathe into your aroused genitals “May I be happy.”
Breathe as you savor the feelings of happiness throughout your body.

Continue your breathing and your self-erotic caressing.

Speak a new phrase into your chest, into your heart, “May I live with ease” in this
body. May I live with ease in my heart. May I live with ease in my erotic body.
Breathe ease throughout your whole body. Savor the feelings of well being.

Continue your breathing and your self-erotic caressing.

Become aware of the body in which you are living. Feel this pulsating aliveness
from within. And pray into your heart, “May I be free from inner and outer harm.”
And pray into your awakened genitals, “May I be free from inner and outer harm.”
Let your whole body resonate with freedom from harm, with vibrant well being.
Continue your breathing and your self-erotic caressing.

Bring your awareness back to the connection between your heart and your genitals
as you breathe full deep breaths and pray, “May I care for myself joyfully on this
earth.” Savor as you breathe these words throughout your body erotic.

Continue your breathing and your self erotic caressing.

Savor your awareness of your lived body. Place your attention on the connecton
between your heart and your genitals. Speak your final praying into the core of
your being, “May I come to know freedom.” Allow your body to feel the sensation of
bodily liberation.

Continue your breathing and your self erotic caressing. Allow for a period of no
thoughts, no words, just being.

Now go through the same process while praying for others. You can pray for folks
known to you or unknown to you. See the two examples below.

May my family be peaceful.

May my family live with ease.
May my family be free from inner and outer harm.
May my family care for themselves with joy.
May my family come to know freedom.

May all beings be peaceful.

May all beings live with ease.
May all beings be free from inner and outer harm.
May all beings care for themselves with joy.
And may all beings come to know freedom.

Finish this meditation lying on the floor with five minutes of stillness.

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #6: In the Mirror

Soloving is the act of making love to your self. This Orgasmic Yoga meditation
involves the simple, yet profound act of masturbating in front of a mirror. Eric
Francis offers some guidance for creative soloving. Eric's most radical suggestion
is to look into your own eyes during the session and keep that eye contact as you
climax.

Through the Looking Glass

One of the most powerful memes, or repeated messages of both religion and
advertising is, "You are incomplete and you need another person." So, very early
in life, we are cast off from ourselves and embark on an endless quest of finding
the perfect other. And it turns out to be a pretty hopeless search for most people,
wrought with endless pain and loss, which ferments into resentment and hatred.
You will not find anyone outside yourself until you have found you deep within
yourself. Our culture pushes the idea of monogamy, but we forget that "mono"
means ONE. You are the one.

Mirror masturbation is a confrontation with your essential self, your uncluttered

beauty and your most real sexuality. This is the basic exercise in authentic self-
expression. It may seem shameful at first, and you may be repulsed by the idea.
You may think, "Why would I want to do that?" or immediately conclude that it's
stupid or disgusting; you may feel a shot of fear course through your body,
perhaps the fear that you'll get caught, or that someone else will know. Or you may
be thrilled at the prospect of such an adventure.

Masturbation is about being your own lover, and mirror masturbation is a very
direct and obvious way to experience this.

"As soon as I start touching me, this face changes," my friend Maria wrote to me
yesterday. "There is my lover looking at me. It is the All. I feel myself being very
soft, feeling what I feel, slowly, deep. No pressure, no force, no fear. Nothing but
listening and watching. And I know I am in love with my soul, my eyes, my face,
the warmth of my body. I am becoming my own lover. I have found my way back
home."

The fact that so many people are repulsed or would never dare to talk or think
about masturbating passionately and lovingly in front of a mirror is an indication of
its power. The veil is shame. Shame is powerful; it is a door. Where you feel
embarrassment, you are holding back energy. Shame is the map to your strength.

Go through the door and find out what is on the other side. In any aspect of
sexuality, the stronger the shame, the more pleasure and power it conceals.
Sexual shame conceals a deeper shame of being alive. Often a great well of guilt
is veiled as "a little guilt," and I suggest you explore this possibility. If you have any
lingering traces of resistance or guilt around your existence, here is where you'll
uncover them, and where you're likely to let them go - in front of a mirror.

Some people suffering from self-hatred in the form of "body image" issues, like not
being good-looking enough, feeling overweight or underweight, awkward or
otherwise unsexy, are likely to resist the most strongly, and, by no coincidence,
find the greatest relief and healing.

We are taught that our self-image is something we put on. I would propose it's
something that's far better taken off. All the bullshit loaded on us by religion and
advertising and ex-lovers about how ugly we are can drop off like silk. You will feel
better for doing this. Your life will change.

You'll need two mirrors, a little one to get a close-up look at what your genitals and
face look like in a state of ecstasy, and a larger one for the full body view. Sex
books and Our Bodies, Our Selves have been recommending the make-up mirror
routine to women forever, but largely as an anatomical exercise; finally, in Sex for
One, masturbation pioneer Betty Dodson turned it into an artistic experience of
seeing how beautiful your genitals are.

The large mirror is best floor-length, and better if it's wide enough to see your feet.
You need to be close enough to make clear eye contact with yourself. I suggest
something that touches the floor, and can be angled; then sit on the floor, where
you have room to spread out. However, any mirror will do.

The idea is not just to see what you look like masturbating, but rather to see what
you look like feeling what you're feeling, and to witness the beauty of this. Stay
with you. Remain aware. At times masturbating in front of mirrors, I have barely
recognized the sight of my own face, and seen many expressions for the first time.
These are not the faces I put on for the world; I have had to get used to what I
really looked like in a state of openness and release rather than in "personality
mode." I have seen in my own eyes the expression of loneliness and sexual
deprivation, and watched it melt away as I drew closer to myself. In one
experience, green spirals shot between my eyes and the reflection of my eyes as I
went into my orgasm.

I suggest you watch yourself undress, exploring the visual impression of your
body, and witness your physical responses as you get turned on; watch as you
explore your pleasure, and dare to explore yourself a little deeper. As you witness
this, tune into the feeling of compassion for yourself. There is a lot of passion in
compassion, and this is where you will find it. Move into a safe space of total love
and acceptance of yourself; it's easy; brush away the veils; see yourself beautiful.
You are.

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #9: Erotic Trance Dancing

Orgasmic Yoga sessions are celebrations of being erotically embodied. These

practices are foundational for your health and wellbeing.

Erotic Trance Dancing involves moving to music as your caress yourself into a
highly aroused, erotically embodied state. Trance Dancers are incredibly embodied
individuals. This is a most recommended practice. And you don’t have to be a
good dancer. In fact, this practice is greatly beneficial for those who feel awkward
dancing. Dancing blindfolded helps the dancer to stay focused within.

Finish your Trance Dance by lying on the floor for five minutes of stillness.

Trance Dancing is the way many western teenagers masturbate. You just lock
your bedroom door, strip, choose the playlist on your iPod, grab some oil, and
boogie.

Take great care in choosing the music for your practice sessions. With the help of
iTunes you can create a playlist in a couple of minutes. Some general playlist
suggestions include using heart opening music, music that recalls a specific place
and time in your life, personal myth songs, erotic music, and ethnic music. Music
that inspires you to move, to breathe, and to feel will best support you on this part
of the path on your journey to embodiment.

Quote:
The chaotic method is to destroy the old patterns, not to create a new one. It is not
to create a pattern at all; just, the old pattern has to be destroyed. The method, all
meditative methods, are just destroy your conditioning without conditioning you in
any way; otherwise there will simply be a change of fetters, a change of prisons.
The new prison may look a little better but it is still a prison. -- Osho

Orgasmic Yoga Meditation #10: Self Erotic Massage

Orgasmic Yoga invites us to place our attention within our bodies during sexual
arousal. The source of our excitement is not erotic imagery but our touching and
awareness of our own alive body. Each practice session offers us a different way
of consciously sensing, savoring and listening to the erotic wisdom within our
physical selves. Learn to benefit from these signals, voices, and wisdom.

Orgasmic Yoga meditations involve an enduring state of sexual arousal that is

maintained with relatively little stimulation. This arousal is actually sourced from
within our body. This erotic trance state is a manifestation of erotic embodiment.
Many individuals know how to get to prolonged erotic states through making use of
erotic imagery, fantasy, memory, or erotic writings. The mindful, highly aroused,
and easily maintained erotic trance states discussed here are consciously created
by touching ourselves, by moving, and by placing our attention on the pulsating
interior life of our bodies.

Many practitioners of Orgasmic Yoga do some sort of physical exercise before

beginning any erotic meditation that involves this prolonged arousal. There are two
major pathways to this erotic trance state. One involves getting aroused using
erotic imagery and then moving your placement of attention to your lived body in
the present moment. See more about this in the Orgasmic Yoga practices
involving pornography section.

The second major route is sometimes called “playing with your self.” Here your
placement of attention is focused on your self-touch, on your breathing, on your
movement, and on the feelings of aliveness and pleasure within your body in the
present movement. The ability to arouse your self without depending on some
outside source of excitement is central to your erotic freedom and sexual health. If
you have lost your ability to get aroused from touching and being present with your
physical self, this can be relearned through Orgasmic Yoga practice.

Imagine who you would be after receiving thirty hours of erotic massage from
yourself. Although this Self Erotic Massage meditation does not suggest any
specific structure or strokes, we do recommend constant self-touch. While one
hand stimulates the genitals, the other hand caresses, vibrates and kneads other
parts of your body. Your placement of attention is both on your feelings of being
touched and on the experience of giving touch. Repeating various self-touch
strokes ten, twenty or more times allows for your awareness to focus on and savor
what is being experienced within. This Orgasmic Yoga practice is especially
recommended for individuals who are professional massage therapists. Too often
people who make use of their hands for others’ pleasure neglect their own bodies.

Somatic sexologist and psychotherapist, Barnaby Barratt, teaches that “self-

pleasuring is the foundation of our potential to love and be loved.” Barnaby further
writes, “the capacity to engage in active self-stimulation of our own skin envelope
is thus essential to the formation of a healthy and happy sense of self.” We are
warned that a lack of self-touching results in profound unhappiness and even
addictive behavior.

After each session of self-erotic massage, reflect on and write down what you liked
best about the massage. Also write about any resistances or distractions that
interfered with the flow of your self-erotic massage. Did anything surprise you?
What did you learn that will guide your next session?