ESSAYS

ESSAY 1: AGREE/DISAGREE (DIET/FITNESS/HEALTH/FOOD)

QUESTION

Currently there is a trend towards the use of alternative forms of medicine. However, at best
these methods are ineffective and at worst they may be dangeorus.

To what extent do you agree with this statement?

ANSWER

Alternative medicine is not new. It is accepted that it pre-dates conventionals. It is accepted

There are several reasons why the conventional medical community is often dismissive of
alternatives. Firstly, there has been little scientific research into such medicine, so there is a
scarcity of evidence to support the claims of their supporters. Furhtermore, people often try
such treatment because of recommendations from friends, and therefore come to the
therapist with a very possitive attitude, which may be part of the reason for the cure.
Moreover, these therapies are usually only useful for long-ter, chronic conditions. Acute
medical problems, such as accidental injury, often require more conventional methods.

On the other hand, there remain strong arguments for the use of alternatives. Despite the lack
of scientific proof, there is a lot of anecdotal evidence to suggest that these therapies work. In
addition, far from being dangerous, they often have few or no side effects, so the worst
outcome would be no change. One of the strongest arguments for the effectiveness of
alternative therapies in the West is that, whilst conventional medicine is available without
charge, many people are prepared to pay considerable sums for alternatives. If they were
toatlly unhelpful, it would be surprising if this continued.

I strongly believe that conventional medicine and alternative therapies can and should coexist.
They have different strengths, and can both be used effectively to target particular problems.
The best situation would be for alternative therapies to be used to support and complement
conventional medicine.

COMMENT

The writer in this IELTS sample essay introduces the topic in the introductory paragraph
(Alternative medicine…) and puts forward a clear view on the issue (I am unconvinced…and
feel…).

The essay has a well-balanced argument looking at both sides of the issue. The first body
paragraph expresses some doubt about alternative therapies (…little scientific research…only
useful for long term…), but in the second body paragraph the writer takes a different view (…
few side effects).
The writer’s concluding paragraph offers a strong opinion (I strong believe…) and sums up the
fact that both types of treatment are valid today.

There is also a Good range of grammatival structures (If they were totally unhelpful, it would
be…), and connectors (despite the fact, in addition, finally).

ESSAY 2: DISCUSS TWO OPINIONS (EDUCATION, SCIENCE)

Question

Write about the following topic:

Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs.
Others believe there are much wider beneficts of university education for both individuals and
society.

Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or
knowledge.

Answer

These days, more and more people are making the choice to go to university. While some
people are of the opinion that the only purpose of a university education is to improve job
prospects, others think that society and the individual benefit in much broader ways.

It is certainly true that one of the main aims of university education is to secure a better job.
The majority of people want to improve their future career prospects and attending university
is one of the best ways to do this as it increases a person’s marketable skills and attractiveness
to potential employers. In addition, further education is very expensive for many people, so
most would not consider it if it would not provide them with a more secure future and a
higher standard of living. Thus job prospects are very important.

However, there are other benefits for individuals and society. Firstly, the independence of
living away from home is a benefit because it helps the students develop better social skills
and improve as a person. A case in point is that many students will have to leave their families,
live in halls of residence and meet new Friends. As a result, their maturity and confidence will
grow up enabling them to live more fulfilling lives. Secondly, society will gain from the
contribution that the graduates can make to the economy. We are living in a very competitive
world, so countries need educated people in order to compete and prosper.

Therefore, I believe that although a main aim of university education is to get the best job,
there are clearly further benefits. If we continue to promote and encourage university
attendance, it will lead to a better future for individuals and society.

Comment
The writer in this IELTS writing example has a clear thesis in the second sentence of the
introduction, establishing that two sides of this issue will be discussed (While some people are
of the opinion…others think that).

Looking at the structure, the topic sentences make it clear when the first opinion is being
discussed (it is certainly true that one of the main aims of university is it to secure a better
job.)

And when the writer is moving onto the next opinion (However, there are other benefits for
individuals and society).

Connectors (To begin… Also…Firstly…Secondly) are used well to introduce each new
supporting idea. Further connectors (For example… A case in point is that…As a result…) are
used to expand on these ideas.

Finally, the writer has demonstrated that they are able to use complex sentence structures
(While…that… in order to…as…), and has discussed both views and combined this with his/her
opinion, thus ensuring the question has been answered.

ESSAY 3: DISCUSS TWO OPINIONS (SOCIETY, ENVIROMENT, FAMILY)

Question

Some people think that the main factors influencing a child’s development these days are
things such as television, friends, and music. Others believe that the family still remains more
important. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion.

Answer

While parents obviously play a major role in the way that their child develops as they get older,
many people believe that social gactors outside of the family now influence children much
more. This essay Will examine both sides of the argument.

There is no doubt that there are factors external to the family that significantly impact on a
child’s development. For example, there is television and the internet. Children these days
have access to these much more than they used to in the past, and they Will pick up language
and see things that Will teach them about life. Friends also have an important influence as a
child Will often copy peers that they admire and respect. This could be positive behaviour but
it could also be negative, such as smoking or taking drugs.

Ultimately, however, it is family who have the most important impact. Children spend nearly
all of their time with their family, especially in their early years. They develop their confidence,
socialisation skills, morals, values and views on life through their interaction with them. Proof
of the importance of this can be seen in the differences between some children. Those that
grow up in a dysfunctional home often eventually have problems themselves, whilst those that
are brought up in a warm and chose enviroment end up more confident and secure in adult
life.
To conclude, it is the family that can provide a supportive, secure, and nurturing environment,
which is crucial to the way in which a child becomes an adult. Although it is clear that social
factors play a part, I would argue that it is the former that is the most important.

Comment

The child development essay has a Good introduction that clearly sets out what the two
opposing opinions are (this is done by paraphrasing the question).

The thesis sentence (last sentence of the introduction) then clearly states what Will be in the
essay – a discusión of the two opinions.

The body paragraphs are coherent – each one clearly discusses one of the opinions. Topic
sentences have also been used effectively in each body paragraph to identify the topic and
controlling idea:

There is no doubt that there are factors external to the family that significantly impact on a
child’s development. Ultimately, however, it is family who have the most important impact.

Note the use of ‘however’ to show that a contrasting opinion is to be given. This gives the
writing coherence.

The topic sentence of the second body paragraph also makes it clear that this other side of the
argument is also the writers opinion.

There is some Good topic related vocabulary. For example:

Peers; socialisation skills,; dysfunctional home; supportive; secure; nurturing

There are mix of complex sentences in the child development essay. For example:

While parents obviously play a major role…

There is no doubt that…

Friends also have an important influence as…

Ultimately, however, it is family who…

…whilst those that are brought up…

Although it is clear that…

The candidates opinion is made clear in the second body pargraph, but the candidate clearly
clarifies it in the conclusion and also summarise the main ideas of the essay again.

ESSAY 4: CAUSES & EFFECTS (SOCIETY, ENVIRONMENT, FAMILY)

Question

As countries have developed there has been a trend towards smaller family sizes.

Why does this affect society?

Answer
Many countries around the world are becoming richer as they deveop and at the same time
these countries are seeing a reduction in the size of the family unit. This essay Will discuss the
reasons for this phenomenon and examine some of the posible effects it will have on society.

One of the principal reasons for smaller family units is birth control. As a country develops and
becomes richer, birth control becomes more readily available. This may be due to a rise in the
number of medical clinics or the distribution of free contraception.

The result of this is that people can choose family size. Another important factor is the rise in
the levels of education that occur as a country develops, which means that women are more
educated and more likely to be working. Consequently, many Will want to delay having
children and so will likely have fewer in the long-term.

This can impact on society in a number of ways. One positive effect is that the population will
fall, which will likely result in less poverty as there Will be les competition for scarce resources.
The parents can also provide a better education to their children as it will cost les, which will
benefit society as a whole. A posible negative impact is that there will be fewer younger
people in the workforce in the future, thus making the sustainability of future economic
growth les certain.

In conclusion, family size has fallen due to birth control and education, and this can have
positive and negative impacts on society. Regardless of any impacts, this trend is likely to
continue as countries around the world develop and become wealthier.

Comment

The family size essay is well-organized- the first sentence of the introduction introduces the
topic and this is followed by the thesis which clearly states the issues that will be addressed:

Why family size decreases

How this affects society

Each paragraph then addresses one of these parts in turn.

The first sentences clearly illustrate the topic of each paragraph:

One of the principal reasons for smaller family units is …

This can impact on society in a number of ways.

The conclusion the repeats the thesis

In conclusion, family size has fallen due to birth control and education, and this can impacto n
debt , access to resources , and economic growth.

The family size essay is well signposted with linking words and phrases to lead the reader
through the ideas, giving reasons and results. For example, from body paragraph one:
One of the principal reasons…

This may be due to…

The result of this is…

Another important factor is…

Which means that…

Consequently…

All the content clearly answers the question and the ideas are properly explained so there is no
ambiguity.