Personal and Professional Development:

Chapter 1: Self-Esteem

Objectives:
 Explain the term self-esteem.
 Discuss the “do’s” and “don’ts” of building self-esteem.
 Recognize the impact of low self-esteem.
 List the rewards of a high level of self-esteem.
 Understand how failure paves the way to success.
 Be sensitive to feedback and use it to your benefit.
 Trust others to help gain self-understanding.

Self-esteem and Self-Image

Self-esteem- the extent to which you like, accept, and respect yourself.
Self-image - is made up of variables such as physical appearance, athletic ability, sense of
humor, special talents, morals and ethics, aptitudes, and values and beliefs.

You must be positive about yourself if you ate to be successful and have a rich, full life.

When you dislike yourself, you have a low self-esteem. Those who have low self-esteem may
react by:

 Blaming others for their own weaknesses or faults.

 Becoming easily frustrated or defensive.
 Avoiding situations that make them uncomfortable.
 Feeling weak and incompetent.
 Feeling that others don’t value them.
 Expressing few emotions.
 Being influenced easily by others.

Low self-esteem often leads to:

 Loneliness
 Anxiety
 Resentment
 Irritability
 Little life satisfaction
Career, relationship, and mental health problems can often be traced to the quality of decisions
and actions and individual has taken, which in turn can be traced back to low self-esteem.

Having imperfections in your personality should not cause you to lose self-respect.

“Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities. Without a humble yet reasonable confidence in
your own powers, you cannot be successful of happy.”
--- Norman Vincent Peale (THE POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING)----

Being a good person who has weaknesses is different than being an imperfect person.
When you can appreciate the good in your personality, and genuinely like yourself, you are
ready to move ahead in planning and working to develop a personality that represents the best
that you can be—with an even higher self esteem.
Do’s of Building Self-Esteem:

 Engage in positive self-talk – Give yourself recognition, praise, and positive self-talk
each day. Remind yourself about the times you excelled, learned new skills, or treated
another person well.
 Remember what you like about yourself – make a list of your good qualities and place it
where you will see it each day.
 Talk with others about your good qualities – a trusted friend, relative, or counselor often
sees qualities in you that you take for granted or overlook.
 Focus on your achievements – your achievements and successes, regardless of how large
or small, are important to your self-image.
 Plan for your future – Look forward rather than dwelling on the past. Make a list of
things you want to do or want to change. Visualize your dreams—what you hope to
accomplish in the future.

Don’ts of Improving Self-Esteem

 Don’t try to imitate someone else –
 Don’t think negatively about yourself –
 Don’t neglect yourself –
 Don’t let setbacks get the best of you

How do you feel about yourself? Do you have a healthy, positive level of self-esteem? Think
about your experiences over the past few months. Rate on a scale 1-5 how often each
statement reflects how you feel.

1-rarely 2-sometimes 3-often 4-frequently 5-usually

1. I don’t like going to school.

2. I am easily bored.
3. I cannot communicate easily with others.
4. I don’t perform my job (or class work) up to par.
5. I get into conflicts with others.
6. I think my friends consider me a failure.
7. I am late or fail to show up for appointments too often.
8. I am not conscientious about my grooming and appearance.
9. I have unattractive physical characteristics.
10. I don’t concentrate on anything for very long.
11. I work hard but accomplish little.
12. I am forgetful.
13. I give up when I can’t get something right the first time.
14. I lack energy and enthusiasm.

Rewards of Good Self-Esteem:

Positive self-esteem results from finding the positives in your life – academic success, self-control, self –
acceptance, and optimism about the future.

They understand that valuing their positive qualities is not about competing with others, but about
understanding themselves and pursuing what is best for them.
Think about the people you know who have high self-esteem. Chances are good that they:
 Take on responsibility (have a “can-do” attitude).
 Take pride in their accomplishment.
 Approach challenges positively and with enthusiasm.
 Are not afraid to show a broad range of emotions.
 Feel qualified to influence others.
 Tolerate frustration, challenges, and setbacks in life.

Everyone has special gifts and unique qualities that make that person exceptional. Think about the
qualities that make you unique and then strive to improve those good qualities. Remember, having
healthy self-esteem enables you to project self-confidence.

Be sensitive to feedback:

Supervisors and coworkers give each other Feedback, information about yourself from another’s
perspective that you can use to evaluate how you are doing. If you take the initiative to ask for
feedback, you will learn even more.

Always be open, alert, and sensitive to both positive and negative feedback. After evaluating the
feedback, you may need to make changes within yourself. Some people mistakenly go out of their
way to ignore feedback that comes from negative experiences.

Here are examples of how you might collect, interpret, and respond to evidence of praise or criticism
from informal feedback.

Feedback: “Our sales are off this month. If this keeps up, it may be necessary to lay off one of the sales
associates.”
Interpretation: I’m not selling as much as I should, and I may lose my job.
Question: “Are you saying that if I don’t increase my sales, I may be fired?”

Response: “No, your sales are among the highest. It’s just that the economy is bad, and people aren’t
buying as much. If this trend keeps up, I may have to lay off one of the new hires.”

Feedback: “Mrs. Lucero is one of our best customers. She said to thank you for your help in getting her
loan application approved.”

Interpretation: One more satisfied customer. I must be doing my job well.

Feedback: “Our supervisor says we need more training in projecting a positive image for the company
when we answer the telephone.”

Interpretation: I may be projecting a negative image when I answer the telephone. Maybe I should
improve my telephone techniques.

There are things we can change about ourselves and things we cannot. Concentrate your energy on
those things that are within your power to change. When you receive feedback:

 Don’t take negative feedback personally. Concentrate your energy on the situation.
 Don’t overreact if you are challenged; the feedback is about the situation, not you as person.
 Learn from the feedback and make necessary changes.
Learn from others:

Anyone in a position to observe your behavior can give you feedback. Welcome these opportunities to
learn about how others perceive you. Try not to be hurt, offended, or resentful. Even when criticism
is hurtful, you can learn from it. Don’t allow your anger to detract from the value of the feedback.

Close friends and associates are a good source of feedback. You may feel a sense of trust and safety in
talking with them. In an environment of trust, you can feel safe to reveal your real self. Only in an
environment of mutual trust can honest, open, two-way communication occur. Be willing to share
openly and honestly. Without that openness on your part, the person may not be willing to be open
and candid about negative feedback.

TIPS FOR BUILDING SELF-ESTEEM

 Each evening, list your accomplishments for that day.

 Do something nice for someone else.
 Build the esteem of others.
 Do something challenging each day.
 Think positive thoughts
 Establish and work toward your goals.
 Look your best.
 Handle problems one at a time.
 Eat the foods your body needs.
 Learn a new skill or start a new hobby.
 Ask for and accept feedback.
 Take advantage of all educational opportunities.
 Allow personal time for yourself each day.
 Post self-improvement reminders in your work and personal areas.
 Don’t make negative comments about yourself or others.
 Volunteer to help or share your skills with others.

Self-Development

Objectives:

 Explain how self-confidence affects success.

 Visualize the improvements needed to reach your potential.
 Set long-term self-improvement goals.
 Use behavior modification for self-improvement.
 Develop mentoring relationships.
 Explain tools available to predict occupational success.

DEVELOP A SELF-IMPROVEMENT PLAN

If you are to take charge of yourself and become successful in your life and work, you must start with a
clear, realistic image of where you are now and where you want to be in the future.

A self-improvement plan is not static; rather, it is a life-long process that changes with your growth and
experience.
 Vision of your
future self

Clear, specific, and

measurable goals

Action plan for

achieving each goal

BUILD SELF-CONFIDENCE

Self-confidence influence your ability to put your self-improvement plan in motion.

John Wesley defines self-confidence as “the difference between feeling unstoppable and feeling scared
out of your wits.”

Self-confidence is displayed by a pleasant demeanor, positive outlook on life, friends, and satisfaction
with life in general.

Techniques in building your self-confidence in your career, relationships, health, and hobbies:

 Use positive self-talk – say positive things to yourself every day. Positive “self-talk” programs your
mind to act optimistically.
 Increase your knowledge and skills – the foundation for a healthy self-confidence is a “bank” of
knowledge and experience. At work, go beyond what is expected. Gain new skills. Ask questions
about concepts that you don’t understand. Get an education and become a lifelong learner.
 Learn from mistakes – Successful people fail, but they don’t stop. They rethink the situation, learn
from mistakes, and try again.
 Expect to succeed – develop a “can do” attitude and raise your level of self-expectation will
empower you to do well.
- Proverb: “Nothing breeds success like success”
- Nothing makes us happier than when we set a goal for our self and succeed in reaching that
goal.
 Conquer shyness – Force yourself into new habits. Begin with going out your way to speak to a new
person each day.
- Smile and say “Good morning “as you pass a friend or coworker as a start.
- As you gain confidence, move on to asking a question or making a comment.
- Observe people who are outgoing and learn from them.
 Accept responsibility for your success – By committing to your dream, you program your brain to
look for solutions to keep you going on the path to success.
- Take responsibility for creating a self-improvement plan that involves a realistic vision of your
future self, long term goals, and an action plan.
- Stephen Covey defines responsibility as “the ability to choose one’s response.”

VISUALIZE YOUR FUTURE

Self-improvement begins with visualizing you future self, identifying specific and measurable goals, and
devising action plans to meet those goals.

Imaging – refers to deliberately picturing your life as you would like it to be.
Self-actualization- the process of growing to reach your greatest potential and it is a life long process.

SET GOALS
Everyone has its goals-clearly stated results they want to achieve within a specified time period.

Action Plan – an organized series of actions to achieve a specific goal.

Goal-setting- the overall process of achieving your goals.

When setting goals, consider the broad aspects that are important in your life:
 Career
 Education and training
 Finances
 Relationships (family, friends, and coworkers)
 Health
 Hobbies and Interest

When you set goals for yourself, state them clearly, put them in writing, and include the date you expect
to complete them.

Vague Goals Clear Goals

Get an education Earn an associate’s degree in graphic design within two years.
Reduce my stress level Lower my blood pressure eight points by attending yoga
classes three nights a week this fall.
Develop my musical talent Take guitar lessons next semester at the community college.

A goal that is vague or express like an instruction has limited value.

(Work) – Effective managers and supervisors help employees succeed by developing and writing specific,
Straight forward goals that reflect what must be accomplished in a certain time frame.

SMART GOALS ARE:

S – pecific (what exactly do you want to accomplish?)

M – easurable (How will you assess your progress?)
A – ttainable (Is your goal within your reach?)
R - elevant (is your goal important to your plan for life?)
T – imely (what is your deadline for completing this goal?)

DEVELOP ACTION PLANS

Develop an action plan as a strategy for reaching your goals. For each goal, write down the steps and
timeframe that will bring you closer to achieving your long-term goals.

Goal: To be promoted to the position of web specialist within two years.

Action Plan:
 Investigate the requirements for the web specialist position.
 Shadow a web specialist to better understand the duties.
 Enroll and complete two courses at the community college.
 Develop a website for a charitable group.
 Apply for the position of web specialist.

Short-term Action:
 Contact someone in human resource to find out the specific qualifications and requirements for the
position of web specialist.
 Contact the local community college and research the relevant courses.
 Contact a counselor or the registrar’s office to see if I meet the prerequisite for enrolling in the
courses.

TIPS:
1. Excellent Physical Health.
2. Excellent in Your Work.
3. Involvement in your Community.
4. Good Relationships.
5. Personal Growth and Development
6. Self-Motivation
Creating a personal action plan is not difficult. It takes a little time, thought, and planning. Here’s one of
many ways to create an action plan:

1. Determine the goal.

2. Chart the route.
3. Define every step it will take to attain the goal and keep on track.
4. Modify the personal action plan as necessary.
5. Review the action plan.

BE ACCOUNTABLE

Your success in meeting your goals will depend on how committed you are to succeed.
If you are passionate about your goals and hold yourself accountable for taking the necessary actions to
Meet them, it is easier to maintain the motivation and persistence required to succeed.

Think of each goal as a contract with yourself.

Knowing that when you make promise to yourself, you keep it.
Remember, you can achieve realistic goals if you hold yourself accountable for sticking with your plan.

 PERSONAL CONTRACT

 DATE: May 2, 2010

 I promise to set up an appointment with Christine

Glenn, Director of Human Resources for ABC Financial
Services on or before May 15, 2010 to discuss the
education and experience requirements for the position of
web specialist

 Heidy Clayborn
Improvement Requires Work

Personal development involves making a lifelong commitment to reaching your goals and being all that
you can be. To be successful in your career and personal life, you must make a conscious effort to
continue to grow personally and professionally.
Follow these guidelines as you develop your self-improvement program.
 Start Now
 Start small – Don’t try to do everything at once. Focus on your highest priorities and add other goals
as time goes by.
 Involve others – they can help keep you on course, listen and offer feedback, and be there to help
you celebrate success.
 Don’t give up – don’t think of a slip as defeat – think of it as an opportunity to try again.
 Stay focused on your goals – Review your goals every day. Place them where you will see them each
day and be reminded of their importance.
 Acknowledge your improvements – Recognize how far you have come and celebrate each goal you
achieve.
 Let every success trigger a new goal – There will always be something new to learn, something
higher to attain. Keep moving forward.
 Focus on gratitude – Set aside time each day to mentally list what you have, to be thankful for –
unique skills, success, and positive relationships.

CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR

Behavior modification – refers to the use of techniques to improve or change behavior.

- It rewards people for making good decisions and discourages unwanted behavior.
- A reward or benefit can be a strong motivational tool to change behavior.
- The reward or benefit used is referred to as reinforcement.
- Rewards are generally better motivators than punishments.
- Begin by thinking of things you enjoy that you might use as rewards.
- Rewards for behavior modification should be realistic.
- Personal development is a step-by-step process, so plan small rewards at each step along the
way.
LEARNN FROM A MENTOR

Many companies recognize the benefits of establishing formal mentoring programs.

Someone is assigned to help new employees with on-the-job orientation and training.

Mentor (Coach) - person who helps an individual develop on the job, they may offer advice, answer
questions, help a new employee understand the culture of the business, share expertise and
experiences, and serve as role model.
- Mentoring relationship require open communication and a commitment from both parties.
- A mentor will talk with you privately about questions or issues and do his or her best to help you
achieve your self-improvement goals.
- A mentor’s support and feedback are usually nonjudgmental and based upon honesty and trust.

SEEK COUNSELING

A counselor or therapist can help with the process of understanding and appreciating where you are in
your personal and career development.
Talking with a professional counselor can also help you appreciate the many positives aspects of
personality, your education, your employment experiences, and your natural abilities.

Large companies and government agencies:

(EAP) – Employee Assistance Program

- Help employees deal with personal problems that might adversely affect their job performance,
health, or well-being.
 - Information about EAP programs can be found in the human resources office of most companies
or government agencies.
- EAP services generally include assessment, short-term counseling, and referral services for
employees and their household members.

TAKE APTITUDE AND INTEREST TESTS

Career interest and aptitude tests can help you better understand your potential for success in various
career fields.
Some tests measure characteristics that relate to the demands of various work situations.
For instance:
 Do you like detail work?
 Are you by nature an orderly person?
 Do you enjoy teamwork, or would you prefer to work alone?
 Do you enjoy the challenge of variety and change in your work?
 Do you work well with mechanical things?
 Do you want a 9-to-5 job or a flexible schedule?
 Do you have an aptitude for work involving math and science?

Answers to these types of questions will help you focus on your interest, aptitudes, and preferences.

TRY OUT A WORK SITUATION

Try-out experience – provides an actual on-the-job opportunity for a limited period of time.

Another kind of try-out experience would be to enroll in a course related to the field you want to
explore.
An internship program – coordinates classroom and laboratory training with on-the-job training in the
work environment. Internship (test your interest and abilities and build your self-confidence before
you commit to a career program.)

POINTS TO REMEMBER

 Signs of a self-confident person include a pleasant demeanor, a positive outlook on life, a circle of
friends, and a sense of satisfaction with life in general.
 Improve your self-confidence by reviewing your positive characteristics, talking positively to
yourself, taking advantage of opportunities to build your knowledge and skills, moving on despite
setbacks, increasing your expectations for yourself, and planning for self-improvement.
 Self-improvement begins with a vision of your future self, involves identifying specific goals, and
devising action plans that will help you accomplish your long-term goals.
 Put your goals and action plans in writing. Stay focused on your goals and hold yourself accountable
for your action plans.
 Self-actualization is a lifelong process. Expect to reassess and redefine your identity throughout your
career and life.
 Behavior modification requires developing your own system. Make contracts with yourself about
your goals and action plans and keep the contracts.
 A mentoring relationship with a coworker or supervisor can help you achieve your plans for self-
improvement. Mentoring relationships require open communication and a commitment from both
parties.
 Employee Assistance Program, aptitude and interest testing, try-out experiences, and internship
programs are valuable self-improvement resources.
CRITICAL THINKING ACTIVITY

Last In, First Out

Jeff has enjoyed tinkering with cars as long as he can remember. He was elated when he fulfilled his goal
to earn a Certified Automotive Technician degree from the local technical institute. The placement
department of the institute helped him meet another goal – a job with a local automobile manufacturer.
Jeff has been on the job for ten months. He enjoys the challenges and has established a reputation for
being punctual, dependable, and capable.

Unfortunately, the economy has experienced a major downturn and Jeff (a “new hire” from the
standpoint of the company) is one of the first to be laid off. Jeff is shocked and devastated. He feels that
he has failed. He tells his friend Dan, “I guess I’m just no good at this job. I tried my best, but I couldn’t
hold a job for even a year. Now what am I going to do? I need a job! But who is going to hire a loser?”

1. What is Jeff’s biggest obstacle at this point in his life?

2. What does jeff need to do to get back on track?
3. What advice might Dan give Jeff? What role could Dan play in Jeff’s future?
4. Write a new long-term goal for jeff. Develop an appropriate action plan for the new goal.