Bohdi Sanders David Nelson Moder

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Modern Bushido: Living a Life of Excellence

Sanders, Bohdi

2012-07-31T18:30:00+00:00
Copyright © 2012 by Bohdi Sanders
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or utilized in any form by
any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any
information storage and retrieval system, without prior written permission from the
publisher.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Sanders, Bohdi, 1962-
Modern Bushido: Living a Life of Excellence
ISBN – 978-1-937884-06-2
eBook ISBN: 978-1-62345-495-1
1. Martial Arts. 2. Self-Help. 3. Philosophy. I. Title
Acknowledgments

I want to express my sincere appreciation to my beautiful wife, Tracey, for all of her
patience for my many hours spent at my computer researching and writing Modern
Bushido. Without her love and support this book would have never come to fruition. I also
want to thank her for taking time out from her busy schedule to read and edit Modern
Bushido. That is just one of the perks of being married to a great English teacher.
In addition, I want to thank all of my readers who continue to buy my books and pursue the
warrior lifestyle. All of your emails and letters definitely let me know that my books and
writing are making at least some difference in the world. I hope that you each find Modern
Bushido worth your time.
Note to the Reader

Although the term “warrior” is most often used to refer to men, it is used in this book as a
generic term which refers to both men and women. Also, for the ease of reading, I have
used the generically accepted term “he” throughout this book instead of the politically
correct derivative “he or she” to refer to both men and women warriors. This book in no
way is meant to discriminate or insinuate that true warriors are only men. Modern Bushido
is written for everyone, men and women, who want to live a life of excellence.

About the Author


Bohdi Sanders is a lifelong student of wisdom literature, the healing arts, and the martial
arts. His studies led him to explore the wisdom behind natural health, naturopathy, herbs,
Reiki Qigong, meditation, and the power of the mind to heal the body and to make positive
changes in one’s life. These explorations led to him earning doctorate degrees in
naturopathy and in natural health.
Dr. Sanders is also a Certified Personal Fitness Trainer, a Certified Specialist in Martial Arts
Conditioning, a Certified Reiki Master, and a Certified Master of G-Jo Acupressure. He holds
a black belt in Shotokan Karate and has studied various other martial arts for over 30
years. He has worked with young people for over 20 years and is endorsed to teach in five
different subject areas. He is the author of:
• Warrior Wisdom: Ageless Wisdom for the Modern Warrior
• Warrior Wisdom: The Heart and Soul of Bushido
• The Warrior Lifestyle: Making Your Life Extraordinary
• The Secrets of Worldly Wisdom
• Secrets of the Soul
• Wisdom of the Elders
• Modern Bushido: Living a Life of Excellence
Dr. Sanders’ books have received high praise and have won several national awards,
including:
• The Indie Excellence Book Awards: 1st Place Winner 2010
• USA Book News Best Books of 2010: 1st Place Winner 2010
• IIMAA: Best Martial Arts Book of the Year 2011
• USA Martial Arts HOF: Literary Man of the Year 2011
• U. S. Martial Artist Association: Inspiration of the Year 2011
• U. S. Martial Arts Hall of Fame: Author of the Year 2011
www.TheWisdomWarrior.com

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments
About the Author
Forward
Introduction
Chapter 1: Character: The Nature of the Superior Man
Chapter 2: Integrity: The Essence of the Warrior
Chapter 3: Virtue: The Moral Excellence of the Warrior
Chapter 4: Correct Thought: The Mind of the Warrior
Chapter 5: Right Actions: The Warrior’s Building Blocks
Chapter 6: Correct Speech: The Words of the Warrior
Chapter 7: Wisdom: The Way of the Sage
Chapter 8: Honor: The Warrior’s Mark of Distinction
Chapter 9: Respect: The Consideration of Thoughtfulness
Chapter 10: Discipline: The Art of Self-Control
Chapter 11: Honesty: The Elusive Facts of Life
Chapter 12: Courage: The Spirit of Valor
Chapter 13: Endurance: The Warrior’s Fortitude
Chapter 14: Justice: The Warrior’s Conviction
Chapter 15: Sincerity: The Genuine Article
Chapter 16: Self-Knowledge: The Warrior’s Introspection
Chapter 17: Preparedness: The Spirit of Readiness
Chapter 18: Benevolence: The Warrior’s Heart
Chapter 19: Courtesy: The Art of Civility
Chapter 20: Spirituality: The Warrior’s Peace
Chapter 21: Meditation: The Inner Secret
Chapter 22: Insight: The Art of Discernment
Chapter 23: Self-Reliance: The Warrior’s Independent Spirit
Chapter 24: Friendship: The Sacred Brotherhood
Chapter 25: Filial Duty: The Warrior’s Ultimate Responsibility
Chapter 26: Balance: The Art of Harmony
Chapter 27: Excellence: The Spirit of Kaizen
Chapter 28: Loyalty: The Warrior’s Dedication
Chapter 29: Total Self-Defense: The Warrior’s Invincibility
Chapter 30: Acceptance: Living in the Shadow of Death
Chapter 31: The Fool: The Antithesis of the Warrior
Conclusion

Foreword

In 1899, Inazo Nitobe wrote the classic, Bushido: The Warrior’s Code. He gave the early 20th
Century Western world a glimpse into the mind-set of the 18th & 19th Century Samurai and
the virtues of their warrior traditions. He illuminated the seven qualities of what it meant
to be a Samurai, such as loyalty, integrity and respect. Drawing parallels to the knights of
Europe, and their code of chivalry, he tapped into the mythical warrior archetype that lives
in each of us, and more importantly, he gave us a blueprint to see how these attributes
translate into everyday living.
From that blueprint, and his many years of experience as a martial artist and healer, Dr.
Sanders has built a beautiful piece of work, Modern Bushido. Contained within these pages
you are about to read, Dr. Sanders supplies you with an update of what it means to be a
warrior today. Like Mr. Nitobe, yet drawing from many traditions and cultures, Dr. Sanders
brings forth and illuminates the virtues and attributes that exemplify the mythical warrior
that beats in the hearts of all men and women.
I have seen in my practice as a psychotherapist and helping people heal from trauma and
pain, that the warrior archetype is very strong medicine indeed. The mythical warrior
archetype is what empowers and connects you to the source of our own personal power.
Carl Jung, the noted psycho-analyst, whose work in the identification of psychological
archetypes stated, “Myth is more individual and expresses life more precisely than does
science. Science works with concepts of averages which are far too general to do justice to
the subjective variety of individual life.”
Dr. Sanders brings to you a no watered-down version of what science or the experts tell
you a warrior is or is not. He has tapped into the very essence of the Warrior’s Way and
brings it here to your attention today. This book is destined to become a classic in its own
right. Read carefully. Digest each chapter, each page, and each sentence. Meditate upon the
message. Let it sink in and feel its power. Dr. Sanders has placed it here for you to find. Be
well and enjoy.
David Nelson, PhD
Martial Artist & Author of: Black Belt Healing:
A Martial Artist’s Guide to Pain Management & Injury Recovery.

Introduction

I have studied martial arts for almost 30 years, and have seen many amazing martial artists
do things with their bodies that can simply boggle the mind. I have seen some of the best
fighters in the world and have trained with many martial arts instructors and other
practitioners. I have also been involved in more physical confrontations than I care to
remember, and know what it is like to both pound someone into a pulp, as well as be
pounded. In addition, I have been trained in how to use different weapons in self-defense
situations.
In short, I have witnessed and experienced a lot when it comes to the physical side of the
martial arts, but with all my experience, I have found one subject that seems to always get
little or no attention in the world of martial arts – how to live a life of character. Most
martial arts classes are completely focused on self-defense, fighting, sport applications,
tournaments, and katas. While all of these are important parts of the martial arts, there is
something even more important missing from this list – character training.
This is what Modern Bushido is all about – how to live the life of the superior man. While
this may sound like an elitist statement, it isn’t. Living the life of the superior man is simply
a way of saying living a life based on character, honor and integrity. It is living the warrior
lifestyle the way it should be lived, according to universal standards and principles which
make someone a superior human being.
When I say the words “superior human beings,” I am not referring to someone being better
or more important than someone else. The phrase “superior man” was used frequently by
Confucius to indicate someone who lives according to high moral standards as opposed to
someone who gives little regard to such things. The superior man is not superior because
he is richer, more educated, comes from a better family, or anything along those lines. He is
superior because he lives his life in a superior way. He lives by higher standards than the
average person.
This has always been the ideal behind the philosophy of Bushido. Literature from the 13th
through the 16th centuries in Japan had many references to the ideals of Bushido. The
actual word “Bushido” was first used in the 17th century, but the ideals of Bushido have
been around as long as there has been a warrior class, not just in Japan, but throughout the
world. Bushido did not necessarily start out as a specific set of rules that must be followed,
but rather moral principles which were meant to guide the life of the warrior. More
frequently than not, the principles of Bushido were simply taught to children of the warrior
class from an early age as a way of life that was expected from them.
The philosophy of Bushido evolved over the centuries, but it never lost it primary focus
which was living life according to the high standards expected from those of the warrior
class. It is a philosophy of how to live your life as a true, complete warrior. The word
“Bushido” literally means the way of the warrior. This philosophy did not limit itself to
merely martial subjects. On the contrary, the philosophy of Bushido covered subjects such
as how to raise children, how one should dress, how to treat your family and other people,
financial issues, as well as how to conduct yourself as an honorable warrior.
Today the Bushido Code is commonly simplified to seven virtues: rectitude, courage,
benevolence, respect, honesty, honor, and loyalty. But these seven virtues do not cover
everything which Bushido entails; there is much more to Bushido than these seven virtues.
The teachings of Bushido were meant to cover all areas of the warrior’s life, not just a
handful. Limiting Bushido to only these seven virtues is doing a disservice to this noble
philosophy. That is where Modern Bushido comes into play.
In Modern Bushido, I discuss 30 traits which all play an important role in the warrior
lifestyle. Each of these traits helps guide you in living a life of excellence. Many may
question what this has to do with the life of the warrior or martial arts, but this question
assumes that martial arts are merely about self-defense or fighting – they aren’t. Gichin
Funakoshi stated that the ultimate goal of karate is the perfection of your character, not the
perfection of your martial skills.
Learning character traits, which will guide your actions throughout your life, is an
important part of the martial arts, but unfortunately this is also a part that has been
neglected over the years, especially in today’s society where it is needed more than ever.
Self-defense is merely one part of the warrior lifestyle.
The warrior lifestyle is multifaceted and entails much more than martial arts techniques. It
is a complete way of life, not simply a term which encompasses anyone who practices some
type of martial art. There is much more to being a true warrior than knowing how to fight.
You can teach a dog to fight, but that doesn’t make it a warrior.
On the contrary, the warrior lifestyle is a complete way of life. It is a way of living a life of
character, honor, and integrity in every area of your life. It includes martial arts, but it is not
defined by martial arts. One of the definitions of the term “warrior” is a person engaged in
some struggle or conflict. The word “warrior” is not limited to someone who participates in
an actual, physical battle between two armies. Many people disagree with this statement,
but it is true nonetheless.
To take this definition even further, the word “war” doesn’t always refer to a conflict
between two countries or two groups of people. The term “war” can be defined as a
struggle or competition between opposing force or for a particular end. True warriors are
not limited to those who have been in the military. Being a true warrior is dependent on
how you live your life, not on what you do for a living. The true warrior is the man or
woman who endeavors to live the warrior lifestyle and who lives his or her life by the code
of the warrior.
And have no doubts about it, they are at war. Their struggle may not be against some
opposing army, but rather it is a struggle between the opposing forces of living according to
their principles of honor or living without honor. The true warrior, whether in the military
or driving a garbage truck, must decide to live a life of honor and integrity according to the
principles of warriorship. What you do for a living is simply what you do for a living; it is
not who you are. Everyone decides for themselves whether they will live life as a true
warrior or whether they will live their life in some other way.
Being a true warrior is a lifestyle, not a profession. It is not a fraternity where you have to
be in the military to be considered a member. A person is a true warrior because of what is
in his or her heart, mind and spirit, all the rest simply consists of the tools which the person
uses to develop the warrior spirit in order to live the warrior lifestyle.
The purpose of Modern Bushido is to help the true warrior by being a guidebook to the tools
that the warrior needs in order to develop his or her life on the path of the warrior lifestyle.
This is not the final authority of the subject, but merely a guide to help you on your noble
path – the path of the true warrior.
Bohdi Sanders, PhD
Chapter 1
Character
The Nature of the Superior Man
Character: a distinctive mark; a distinctive trait, quality, or attribute; essential quality;
nature; the pattern of behavior or personality found in an individual or group; moral
constitution; moral or ethical strength; self-discipline.
Your character is essentially who you are as a person. It is the person that you have become
through your actions and decisions over your lifetime, your essence if you will. The
character of the warrior is the intrinsic qualities and principles which make him what he is
– a man of integrity and honor. It is the character of the true warrior which makes him a
superior man.
The true warrior, by nature and training, is indeed a superior man. He holds himself to a
higher standard than most men, especially in today’s society. The superior man holds his
character, his reputation and the qualities which make him a man of excellence, in high
esteem. To the warrior, it is his character which sets him apart from the average man. Any
man can be trained to fight, but it takes much more than a set of physical skills to be a true
man of honor; it takes character.
Gichin Funakoshi, the father of Shotokan karate, stated that, “The ultimate aim of Karate
lies not in victory or defeat, but in the perfection of the character of the participant.” The
same could be said of the ultimate goal of the warrior. While it is true that the warrior
trains his spirit, mind and body to be victorious when circumstances demand extraordinary
action, the vast majority of the warrior’s training is involved with the perfection of his
character. Perfecting his character and becoming a superior man is the warrior’s definitive
purpose.
Furthermore, over the years, the warrior will find that he will have many more
opportunities to use his character training than he will to use his physical training. Of
course the warrior’s physical training and the development of his character are both
important parts of the warrior lifestyle, but the latter will be used on a daily basis. Every
man’s character is tested daily through interactions with those who he comes in contact
with during his daily activities.
Therefore, it is imperative that you develop a strong moral character, and the strength to
cultivate and maintain that character, once you have planted the seeds of excellence in your
life. You have to decide what you stand for and what you will not stand for. Don’t leave your
character and your reputation to chance – take responsibility for your life. It is your duty to
build your character. Nobody else will do it for you, but there are many who are willing to
help you weaken it or totally destroy it.
You have to be strong enough to stand up for what you believe, even if you are standing
alone. Public opinion and outside pressures should not play a part in swaying the core
beliefs which make up your true character, but they will if you don’t know exactly what you
believe and why you believe it. You have to know why certain character traits are
important to you. If your foundation is not solid, sooner or later you will find problems
which are a direct result of your shaky foundation.
Your character is the foundation of all the other parts of the warrior lifestyle. Without a
solid foundation, it is easy for you to veer off track in one way or another. For this reason, it
is vital that your character adheres to the highest standards. Don’t compromise where your
character is concerned. This is just one of the traits that sets the warrior apart as a superior
man. Work to build a solid character and maintain a reputation which is true to your nature
as a superior man.
This brings us to the question of how do you compose your character. How does a person
develop a set of qualities or traits in his life that sets him apart from the common man?
Where do you start? This can be an especially tricky question if one does not have
background knowledge concerning what comprises good character traits, or if one has
failed to live a life filled with these positive qualities over the years.
The best way to start to compose your character or to change your character if need be, is
to study the traits which you want to incorporate into your life. Study the traits of the
superior men of the past. What made these men “men of character?” Why do you admire
them? What traits set them apart in your mind? By studying the lives of warriors, sages,
and men of character, you can get a good picture of what it takes to be a man of character –
a superior man.
These men sought to live lives of honor and integrity. They took life seriously and lived life
to the fullest, at the same time, they did so without compromising their character. These
men were not perfect. Nobody is perfect. They simply worked at being men of character.
They made a firm decision about the way that they were going to live their lives and
followed through with that decision.
When they found that they had fallen short or had faults that needed to be corrected or
removed, they made the effort to make the necessary changes. Everyone falls short on this
quest. The key is to not give up when you miss the mark. When you are sighting in your
rifle and you miss the bull’s eye, you don’t give up; you simply adjust your sights and refine
your technique until you are able to place your shots where you want them to be.
The same principle applies to the development of your character. When you miss the mark
or find that you have a habit that is not in sync with the person that you want to be, you
should simply make the necessary changes to bring your actions into harmony with the
character that you want to cultivate. This is an ongoing process. Although you may develop
your character to that of a superior man, you will never reach a point where you will not
have to make adjustments from time to time.
Building and maintaining your character takes time. It doesn’t happen overnight. Just as it
takes weeks for the cherry blossom to actually become a cherry, it takes months, even
years to perfect your character. Be patient with yourself, especially when you fail to live up
to the standards which you are striving to achieve. Don’t allow frustration over your
failures to cause you to throw in the towel on your goal to become a man of excellence.
Sophocles, one of the most influential writers of Ancient Greece, wrote that, “All men make
mistakes, but a good man yields when he knows his course is wrong, and repairs the evil.”
As I stated above, no one is perfect. Your imperfections do not indicate that you are not a
man of character, but merely that you are a human being. George Washington pointed out
that even the greatest men are not without their faults when he said, “It is to be lamented
that great characters are seldom without a blot.”
It is your duty to work to achieve the perfection of your character, not to be perfect. Every
gardener works hard to maintain his garden and keep it as weed free as possible. This
doesn’t mean that his garden will never have any weeds. It means that when he becomes
aware of those weeds, he takes steps to remove them. It takes continual work for him to
keep his garden weed free. Maintaining a weed free garden is a constant struggle, but one
in which he is dedicated to in order to cultivate the type of garden that he wants and can be
proud of growing.
Just as the gardener has to continually tend to his garden, you have to work at maintaining
both your character and your reputation, even after they have been formed. Living up to
your high standards is a never-ending process and there will always be temptations to
lower your standards or temporarily set them aside. You have to have the intestinal
fortitude to maintain your standards no matter what others around you say or do. Your
character has to be able to withstand the tide of public opinion, the actions of others, and
your own weaknesses.
Don’t let others influence your decisions, at least not in a negative way. Don’t compromise
your principles to please someone else or to avoid displeasing those around you. Stand
firm. Live according to your nature – the nature of the superior man. It can be very
tempting to allow the actions of others to influence your own actions in a negative way.
When someone treats you with disrespect or in a rude manner, it is tempting to respond in
kind, but this is not the character of the superior man.
Emerson pointed out that, “Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist.” The man of
character cannot afford to allow others to dictate his actions. The 17th century Spanish
writer and one of my favorite authors of old, Baltasar Gracian, stated this perfectly when he
wrote, “The man of principle never forgets what he is, because of what others are.”
Don’t choose your actions according to the actions of others, but rather to your own
standards and principles. Let your own conscience be your guide. You know which actions
are in accord with your standards, and which are not. After you have developed quality
character traits in your life, you can depend on your conscience to be a reliable guide
concerning what you should and should not do.
Lao Tzu, the author of the classic book, Tao Te Ching, another one of my favorite books,
made this point stating, “Highly evolved people have their own conscience as pure law.” He
went on to teach that, “A person experiences the events of life, and the experiences of life in
turn reveal something about that person.” How you respond to the events in your life, both
the good ones and the challenges, reveal your true character.
Sages throughout the ages have taught this same platitude. Plutarch, the famous Greek
historian simply stated that, “The measure of a man is the way he bears up under
misfortune.” Thoreau wrote, “Our true character silently underlies all our words and
actions, as the granite underlies the other strata.” If you want to truly know how well you
have developed your character, pay attention to how you respond to both the challenges
and the triumphs of your life.
This not only applies to those times when you are with other people, but also for the quiet
times when you are alone. The truest test of character is what you do when you are alone.
Do you still live up to your standards when nobody is watching? Do you live up to your
reputation when you are at home with your family or only when you are in public? Your
character should be sincere and genuine, not for show.
You should not act one way in public and another way in private. Your character is revealed
through your words and your actions. You must be consistent and sincere in order to be a
superior man. Strive to make sure that your words and your actions are in line with the
character that you are building. This is the nature of the superior man – the nature of the
warrior.
Aristotle put it this way, “A good man…whatever may befall him, will behave gracefully;
approving his conduct exact, square, and blameless. Slight misfortunes are unable to shake
his well-balanced happiness…Of the circumstances in which he is placed, he will always
make the best and most honorable use.”
This is a good description of the man of upstanding character and can only be lived up to by
making a conscious decision to be a man of character. You have to remain conscious of your
every thought and your every word. Many people basically live their lives on autopilot,
going through life without any true direction, responding in whatever manner their
emotions dictate to them in any given moment. The warrior can’t afford to live his life in
this way; he has to be ever vigilant of his thoughts, words and actions.
He must maintain his character in all of the situations of life. No matter what circumstances
he finds himself in, the man of character will act appropriately, maintaining the principles
which he has firmly decided to incorporate into his life. This takes practice and
determination. Hemingway called this “Grace under pressure.”
This is a tall order. It is not easy, if it were easy, then men of character would not be as rare
as they appear to be in today’s society. You have to constantly work at building and
maintaining your character. You have to develop confidence in the principles that you have
made a commitment to live by during your lifetime. Having this kind of confidence in your
principles takes time and effort to develop; it takes persistent, unrelenting work.
William Ellery Channing described the man of character as, “The greatest man is he who
chooses the right with invincible resolution; who resists the sorest temptations from within
and without; who bears the heaviest burdens cheerfully; who is calmest in storms and most
fearless under menace and frowns; and whose reliance of truth, on virtue, and on God, is
most unfaltering.”
Choose what is right with invincible resolution. It should not matter to the man of character
what others think, say, or do. His focus is always on what is right according to the
principles he has decided to make his own. It is these inner principles which determine the
true character of a man, and the dedication to these principles will be exhibited through his
thoughts, words and actions.
Professing to live by a set of principles, no matter how lofty those principles may be, is
worthless if they do not manifest themselves through your thoughts, words and actions. It
is not enough to be a man of character in your own mind; you have to be a man of character
in every aspect of your life, starting with your underlying principles. Even if your actions
appear upstanding to those around you, if the underlying motivations and principles are
skewed, your actions are questionable at best.
Building your character on strong personal principles is the most important part of the
warrior lifestyle. It is the foundation of all the other traits which make up this lifestyle of
excellence. Each of the other traits that I will be discussing, actually form a part of your
overall character, and together they construct the actual principles and code of life by
which the true warrior strives to live. It is not good enough to appear to be a man of
character; you must truly be a man of character. Thomas Paine stated, “Reputation is what
men and women think of us; character is what God and angels know of us.”
While your reputation is important, at least to a degree, it is your authentic character that
truly matters. Each of the underlying principles or traits which form your true character
must be built on a solid foundation. This foundation is your sincere desire to be a man of
character and to live according to those time-tested principles which make someone a
superior man. Understanding the importance of developing an unquestionable character is
the first step towards living a life of excellence.

Meditations on Character

Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard


than anyone else expects of you. Never excuse yourself.
Henry Ward Beecher
If an urn lacks the characteristics of an urn,
how can we call it an urn?
Confucius
To compose our character is our duty.
Montaigne
It is no easy thing for a principle to become a man’s own
unless each day he maintains it and works it out in his life.
Epictetus
Do not seek to follow in the footsteps
of the men of old, seek what they sought.
Matsuo Basho
Every man who is truly a man must learn to be alone
in the mist of all others, and if need be against all others.
Romain Rolland
Perfection is attained by slow degrees;
she requires the hand of time.
Voltaire
For when moral value is considered,
the concern is not the actions, which are seen,
but rather with their inner principles, which are not seen.
Kant
Lay down for yourself, at the outset,
a certain stamp and type of character for yourself,
which you are to maintain whether you are
by yourself or are meeting with people.
Epictetus
Let them know a real man,
who lives as he was meant to live.
Marcus Aurelius
The man of principle never forgets what he is,
because of what others are.
Baltasar Gracian
What I must do is all that concerns me,
not what the people think.
Emerson
The superior man is watchful over
himself even when alone.
Chung Yung
Our true character silently underlies
all our words and actions,
as the granite underlies the other strata.
Thoreau
A good character is more valuable than gold.
Philippine Proverb
The superior man does not give up good conduct
because the inferior man rails against him.
Hsun-Tzu

Chapter 2
Integrity
The Essence of the Warrior
Integrity: Possession of firm principles; the quality of possessing and steadfastly adhering to
high moral principles or standards.
Where character is the pattern of behavior found in an individual, integrity is the quality of
steadfastly adhering to the principles or standards which form your character. Without
integrity there can be no warrior lifestyle because it requires integrity to live up to one’s
principles through good times and bad. One would simply live by his principles only when
they are convenient if it weren’t for his integrity.
The word integrity comes from the Latin word integer, which means whole or unbroken
completeness. It can also be defined as a state of being complete and undivided, or
incorruptibility. Thus, if you have integrity, your commitment to your own personal
principles will be incorruptible. If we look at integrity from this point of view, it would
mean being true to your beliefs and principles, or as the definition above states, steadfastly
adhering to the high moral principles or standards that you have set for yourself to follow.
This is what integrity means to the true warrior who seeks to live the warrior lifestyle.
Without integrity, it is impossible to truly live the warrior lifestyle because the principles of
the warrior lifestyle are not mere suggestions which one follows when he is in the mood,
and sets aside when they become inconvenient or problematic. The true warrior must first
decide that he is going to live according to the principles, which he has committed himself
to, as his code by which he will live his life.
To successfully do this, he must have unwavering integrity where his important principles
are concerned. It is this integrity which sets the true warrior apart from the average
individual that you meet on the street. Most people live their lives according to the
principle of “what’s best for them personally,” or more accurately, what they believe is best
for them personally. The true warrior looks at his life a bit differently.
To the man who seeks to live the warrior lifestyle, there are more important things to
consider than his own comfort, profit or desires. He is more concerned about doing what is
right instead of what may be financially or personally profitable. Confucius taught this
when he said, “The superior man seeks what is right; the inferior man, what is profitable.”
This is not to say that the man who lives his life according to the standards of the warrior
lifestyle should not consider what is best for himself or his family. It is definitely his
responsibility to provide for his family and to consider his family’s needs and desires.
Everyone should reflect on how to best provide for his family.
The point here is that in considering what is best for his family or himself, the man of
integrity will first consider what is right. This may sound like a small distinction, but in
reality, this one trait sets the true warrior apart from the vast majority of people in this
world. There is a big difference between doing what is right and doing what is simply right
for your bottom line.
The superior man, as Confucius referred to him, puts what is morally right before what is
right for his bank account. For example, he would not murder someone, no matter how
much money he was offered. This would go against his code of honor and the principles by
which he lives his life. Doing so would be a clear indication that he is lacking in integrity, as
well as personal ethics.
This is an extreme example. I’m sure that you can come up with many more examples of
someone who is willing to put personal profit ahead of what is right. The appeal of easy
money is a very strong temptation, especially for someone who lacks personal integrity. A
man of integrity will not lower his standards for money, or for any other sort of personal
gain. He realizes that there are more important things in life than personal comfort,
financial gain or any of the other things for which the common man is willing to trade his
integrity.
The book of Proverbs states that, “The integrity of the upright guides them.” This is true for
those who live their lives according to the principles of the warrior lifestyle. They are
guided by their integrity in the principles by which they live their lives. Here you may argue
that everyone is guided by the principles that they have decided to live by in life, and to a
point, this may be true.
The difference between the superior man and the average person or the actual criminal, is
that he lives by a much higher set of principles than other people. To quote Confucius again,
“The superior man enacts equity, and justice is the foundation of all his deeds.” Basically,
the superior man does what is right, at least to the best of his abilities. This cannot be said
of everyone.
Demophilus stated, “Do what you know to be good without expecting from it any glory.
Forget not that the vulgar are a bad judge of good actions.” You must have the integrity to
do what you know is right, and is in harmony with your own standards, without expecting a
reward for doing right. This is the essence of true integrity. If there were some kind of
compensation for personal integrity, many more people would make an effort to
incorporate integrity into their lives. As is, most people either neglect integrity or merely
assume that they are people of integrity, even though their actions may indicate otherwise.
Many people falsely believe that they can separate their integrity from certain parts of their
life. For example, someone may think that he has personal integrity, but may believe that
“business is business” and that cheating someone on a business deal is simply doing
business. He might rationalize that this is simply business and that it is up to each person to
watch his own back and do his homework. This is a buyer beware type of attitude and is
commonly seen throughout the world.
Robbing someone’s house would probably never cross this person’s mind because that
would be totally unethical according to this person’s so-called integrity. At the same time,
he may consider certain questionable business practices to be totally acceptable, even
though purposely cheating someone in a business deal is simply another way of robbing
someone. This connection never enters this man’s mind. He simply sees one as business
and the other as unethical.
True warriors do not see personal integrity in this way. They view integrity in terms of
their pursuit of living a moral life, which is in line with the character traits of the warrior
lifestyle. In short, they view actions in terms of right and wrong. This is not to say that the
man of integrity sees everything as black and white. There is a big difference between
looking at life’s choices in terms of black and white, and viewing them in terms of right and
wrong.
Most people do not realize this. The warrior’s principles are both set in stone and yet
flexible at the same time. This in no way means that his personal integrity is situational. He
maintains his integrity without compromise. What this means is that what is right guides
his integrity, not a rigid set of rules. Many people have a hard time understanding this
philosophy. Hopefully the following example will help make this clear to you.
Let’s say that one of the principles that a warrior lives by is to be truthful or honest. Part of
living up to this principle would be that the warrior does not lie. This is a pretty
straightforward tenet. Now, someone who lives his life in rigid, legalistic terms would say
that it is never okay to lie, that doing so would undermine his integrity. This is a good
example of someone who looks at his principles in terms of black and white.
The problem with this is that a rigid view of one’s principles can sometimes run crossways
with doing what is right. Let’s continue to examine this concept by looking closer at the
principle of being honest and truthful. I think that we can all agree that being honest is a
virtue and one of the traits that someone living the warrior lifestyle should adhere to as
one of his core principles.
Here’s the difference between the rigid adherence to this principle and the man who views
his principles from the standpoint of right and wrong. The man who views his principles
from the perspective of right and wrong has the ability to be flexible in his principles. No,
this doesn’t mean that he has the option to lie when it is convenient for him, but he does
have the option to bend the truth when it is the right thing to do.
An example of this would be lying to save your life or the life of your loved ones. Say for
instance that you are the victim of a home invasion and the predator asks you if you are
home alone. You are fully aware that your wife is asleep upstairs but you think that you can
better protect her by misleading this guy with a lie and saying that you are home alone. The
man who lives life in terms of right and wrong will have no problem lying to this predator,
and in doing so, will in no way have compromised his principles.
His integrity is still intact. The man of integrity looks at life in terms of right and wrong, not
black and white. Living the warrior lifestyle is not about a rigid adherence to specific rules.
It is about having the personal integrity to live your life by the principles you have decided
to incorporate into your life, and guiding those principles by the concept of right and
wrong. Again, remember the words of Confucius, “The superior man seeks what is right.”
Does this mean that the outcome of your decisions will always turn out right? Nope. No
matter how hard you try to make the right decision, there will be times when things do not
go as you would like them to. The point is that you must have the personal integrity to
make those decisions from a mindset of “what is right.”
To continue with my example, the man of integrity would never lie for purely financial
profit or to take advantage of some innocent victim. He chooses his actions according to
what is right, and that would clearly be wrong. Men of integrity impose certain restrictions
on themselves. This is where their principles come into play. The character traits in this
book are presented as guidance for you to develop your own personal set of principles by
which to live, but each one must be tempered by the dictates of right and wrong in any
given situation.
This takes personal integrity. No one is going to force you to develop these character traits.
No one is going to force you to live up to the principles by which you have decided to live. If
you do not have the personal integrity to follow through and live up to your own personal
code, then that is your choice. You have the right to live your life as you see fit, as long as it
does not interfere with others doing the same.
It is solely on your shoulders to develop your character and your personal integrity. This is
what the warrior lifestyle is all about – disciplining yourself and having the integrity to live
a life of excellence. You are the captain of this ship. It is up to you!
Dr. Charles Hackney, in his excellent book, Martial Virtues, states, “Integrity may be
considered a form of justice-turned-inward in which, rather than an honorable persona
demanding to be treated in a certain manner, the honorable person behaves in a manner
that is true to his ideals…Rather than honor being found in conforming to others’
expectations, honor is found by living up to one’s own beliefs and internalized stands of
right and wrong.”
Having personal integrity does not mean living up to the expectations of others. It means
having the self-discipline to live your life according to your own standards of right and
wrong. The catch here is that your standards of right and wrong must be derived from the
correct principles that guide men of integrity. If everyone on this planet decided for
themselves what is right and wrong, we would have chaos.
The difference in everyone deciding for themselves what is right and what is wrong, is that
the man of principle makes his decision from a place of honor and integrity. His conscience
is highly developed to the point of internally understanding what is right and what is
wrong. He holds himself to a much higher standard than other people. As Emerson said,
“What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think.”
Lao Tzu said the same thing but in a slightly different way stating, “Highly evolved people
have their own conscience as pure law.” For the man of integrity, living life according to
what you think to be right and wrong is not a license to do whatever you may want to do.
Rather it means that you put what is right over all other considerations. But, to do so, you
must first develop yourself to a point of internally knowing what is right and what is
wrong.
In addition, personal integrity means that you will also have to be willing to accept the
consequences of your decisions. Doing what you know is right will not exempt you from the
consequences of governmental laws, but the man of integrity will do what is right
nonetheless because he answers to his own conscience first and foremost. Moliere, the
famous French playwright, put it this way, “It is not only what we do, but what we do not
do, for which we are accountable.”
The person of integrity can be trusted to do what is right because he answers first and
foremost to his conscience. He does not look to others to justify his actions. He makes his
decisions according to the firm, but not rigid, principles by which he lives. It is this
dedication to his principles that enables him to live a life of excellence and which sets him
above the common man.
Without personal integrity, it would be impossible to truly live the warrior lifestyle. You
will find as you continue to read Modern Bushido, that the warrior lifestyle is not a passive
lifestyle. It takes dedication and hard work. It takes self-discipline and perseverance. There
will be many times when it would be easier for you to relax your standards and let some of
your principles slide, times when no one would know but yourself.
The only thing that will keep you on track during times like that is your personal integrity
and dedication to the principles that you have made a firm decision to live by on your
journey to live the warrior lifestyle. Thomas Jefferson explained how he dealt with such
situations stating, “Whenever you are to do a thing, though it can never be known but to
yourself, ask yourself how you would act were all the world looking at you, and act
accordingly.”
Living with integrity has to be a 24/7 process, even when you are alone. To do right only
when others are watching or listening, and live another way when you are alone, is merely
being hypocritical.

Meditations on Integrity

Integrity has no need of rules.


Albert Camus
Integrity is not a conditional word. It doesn’t blow
in the wind or change with the weather It is your inner
image of yourself, and if you look in there and see a man
who won’t cheat, then you know he never will.
John D. MacDonald
A single lie destroys a whole reputation for integrity.
Baltasar Gracian
It is not what we eat but what we digest that
makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save
that makes us rich; not what we read but what we
remember that makes us learned; and not what we
profess but what we practice that gives us integrity.
Francis Bacon
All know the way, few actually walk it.
Bodhidharma
Never do anything against conscience
even if the state demands it.
Einstein
Calamity is the test of integrity.
Samuel Richardson
Follow the good and learn their ways.
Chinese Proverb
It matters not how a man dies, but how he lives.
Samuel Johnson
A precious stone will not lose its shine just
because someone drops it in a cesspool.
Malay Proverb
Whatever the world may say or do, my part is to
remain an emerald and to keep my color true.
Marcus Aurelius
The superior man must always remain
himself in all situations of life.
Chung Yung
No one will honestly question your integrity
if your integrity is truly unquestionable.
Bohdi Sanders
Have the courage to say no.
Have the courage to face the truth.
Do the right thing because it is right.
These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.
W. Clement Stone
One of the truest tests of integrity
is its blunt refusal to be compromised.
Chinua Achebe
A clear conscience is the greatest armor.
Chinese Proverb
Quality is not an act. It is a habit.
Aristotle

Chapter 3
Virtue
The Moral Excellence of the Warrior
Virtue: General moral excellence; right action and thinking; goodness or morality; a specific
moral quality regarded as good or meritorious; excellence in general.
After you have determined that you want to build your character and that you have the
integrity to live by your principles, the next step is to start cultivating the virtues of the
warrior lifestyle. Virtues are considered to be traits which lead you to moral excellence or
excellence in general, as stated in the definition above. Most of the traits that I discuss in
Modern Bushido are considered virtues or traits that will lead you to a life of excellence.
This is why they are actually included in Modern Bushido.
Sai Baba, the popular spiritual teacher and guru, stated that, “You must start with the first
step: the cleansing of the mind and the cultivation of virtue.” It is interesting that this
teacher taught that the first step has to be “the cleansing of the mind,” but if you think
about it, it makes perfect sense. If your goal is to cultivate moral excellence, you must first
get rid of the things in your mind that will interfere with your goal; thus you must first
cleanse the mind.
If you had a small patch of land and you wanted to cultivate a garden on that land, the first
thing that you would need to do is to rid the land of grass and weeds. You do this so you can
properly prepare the soil in order to plant the seeds that you want to grow. It would be
ridiculous to simply go out and throw some garden seeds on the unprepared ground and
expect them to thrive or to even grow. You have to prepare the soil first.
In the same way, you have to prepare your mind in order to plant the seeds of virtue that
you want to grow. Hopefully you are working with some pretty good soil to begin with, but
if not, don’t be discouraged. Anyone with the desire to change their life can do so, as long as
he is willing to work at it.
Although the garden analogy was used to make a point, cleansing the mind is a bit different
than preparing soil to plant a garden. Cleansing the mind involves changing what you allow
your thoughts to dwell on and replacing unwanted thoughts with virtuous thoughts. I will
discuss the importance of your thoughts and the workings of the mind in the next chapter.
For now, what you need to know is that you have to work at developing virtue.
Becoming virtuous is not something that will happen overnight. The expansion of virtues
depends solely on you. You have to work at it, and it is work, not in the physical sense, but
it’s work nonetheless. The Indian philosopher, Nagarjuna, put it this way, “Virtues are
acquired through endeavor, which rests wholly upon yourself.”
So how do you do this work and develop the virtues that you want to be a part of your life?
The same way that you get good at anything else – you practice. Euripides taught, “The
more you practice virtue the easier to practice it becomes.” It is just like your martial arts,
the more you practice a specific kick, the easier it will become to use that kick. Basically, the
more you focus on developing and using your virtues, the more ingrained they become in
your character.
You have to continuously practice using your virtues and focus on their value in your life.
Meditate on virtuous quotes. Read and study the writings from virtuous people. As with
other valuable traits or skills, the development of virtues does not come automatically. You
have to constantly work, not only at developing those skills, but also at keeping your
virtues intact.
If you neglect your martial arts skills and do not use them or continue to practice to
improve them, you will start to notice that they aren’t as sharp. Virtues are the same way.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau, the 18th century philosopher, stated, “Virtue is a state of war, and to
live in it we have always to combat with ourselves.”
This may sound a little weird at first until you think about it, but many of the sages,
teachers, and philosophers of the past have likened building and maintaining your
character to a personal war in which you constantly have to battle temptations to maintain
or develop your virtuous character. It is not easy, but very little that is worthwhile is
achieved without work. Which brings me to my next point – make sure that you are truly
developing your virtuous traits and not merely appearing to be virtuous to impress those
around you.
The well-known American author, Henry David Thoreau, wrote, “There are nine hundred
and ninety-nine patrons of virtue to one virtuous man.” This means that there are a lot of
pretenders out there who want to appear like virtuous men, but underneath their carefully
constructed façade, they are not truly virtuous. While they support being virtuous and will
talk about how one should have this virtue or that virtue, it is all for show. Essentially, they
talk the talk, but don’t walk the walk.
Why do these people do this? Why don’t they simply develop virtue for themselves? The
answer is simple – it takes work and most people are not willing to work for something
that they cannot truly see how it will profit them. They will talk about how everyone should
have this virtue or that virtue, and will berate those who they consider lacking in certain
virtues, but they aren’t willing to work to become virtuous people.
The true warrior will not put on a show for the benefit of others. He strives to be sincere
about the lifestyle that he professes to live. Don’t pretend to live a virtuous life simply to
impress other people; this doesn’t truly improve your life in any way. While it may be true
that it can open certain doors for you or afford you a specific reputation, it does nothing to
truly change your life.
Even those who pretend to be virtuous would like to truly have the virtues that they
pretend to have, but they are simply too weak to do what has to be done to make those
virtues a real part of their lives. The bottom line is that they just can’t see how living a life
of virtue will benefit them, so they continue to live as they always have, and give in to their
weak natures.
One of my favorite writers from the 17th century, Francois de La Rochefoucauld, wrote that,
“Weakness, even more than vice, is the enemy of virtue.” George Washington echoed this
sentiment stating, “Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.” It takes a special
person to truly appreciate what it means to live a virtuous life. Most people prefer to focus
on their own comforts or financial gains, as opposed to developing virtues.
This does not mean that you can’t be virtuous, live a good life financially, and have the nice
things that we all enjoy. It simply means that you have to have your priorities straight. You
shouldn’t trade your virtue for profits, short-lived amusements, or for material things. But,
as George Washington stated, most people are more concerned with those things than they
are with their own character.
The true warrior, on the other hand, seeks to be a man of excellence. He is not concerned
about what other people do as far as how it affects his own personal goals to become a
superior man. Whether or not others decide to practice virtuous living doesn’t concern
him; he knows that he is not responsible for the actions of others. Lao Tzu taught this same
attitude saying, “One should practice steadfast and indiscriminative virtue without
demanding others to do the same in return.” Marcus Aurelius echoed this same thought
professing, “I do what is mine to do, the rest doesn’t disturb me.”
Focus on planting the seeds of virtue in your life, cultivating and nourishing those seeds,
and then making sure nothing destroys your virtue once it has matured. Don’t concern
yourself with what other people think about how you live your life or how they are actually
living theirs. Your job is to improve your own life and to live your life to the fullest, while
doing so with integrity and virtue. If you are really working at improving your own life, you
will not have time to be concerned about what others do or think.
Pliny the Younger, the ancient Roman lawyer, put it this way, “A noble spirit will seek the
reward of virtue in the consciousness of it, rather than in popular opinion.” If you are truly
interested in living the warrior lifestyle, you will be concerned with improving yourself
personally, not making yourself look good to those who do not even understand the
lifestyle that you are trying to live.
Popular opinion doesn’t matter. Oh, of course it does to some extent. Most of us have to
have a job or run our own business, which in turn will have to cater to other people. What I
am talking about here is popular opinion in the sense of what other people think is right or
how other people think you should live. This is especially true of those who are not men of
character and integrity. Why would you care about the opinions of those who clearly
cannot live their own lives in a decent manner?
This brings us to the question, how do you know whether or not someone is virtuous? The
answer is fairly simple, you observe their life. You watch what they do and listen to what
they say, not just in public where they are most likely to be careful in both their actions and
their speech, but also pay attention to their normal, everyday speech and behavior.
The philosopher, Blaise Pascal, wrote, “The power of man’s virtue should not be measured
by his special efforts, but by his ordinary doing.” Watch how people live their everyday
lives if you want to truly know who they are. This same line of thought goes for your own
life as well. How do you live your day to day life when no one else is around? You should
not live one way in public and another way in your private life. This doesn’t mean that you
have to allow others to know everything about you or publicize everything that you do. I
am only referring to your core actions – your inner virtue.
Aristotle looked at the prospect of judging someone’s virtue slightly differently stating,
“Virtue is more clearly shown in the performance of fine actions than in the
nonperformance of base ones.” Aristotle brings up a very interesting point. You can’t really
say someone has virtue because of what he doesn’t do. For example, most people don’t rob
banks, but that doesn’t mean that most people are truly virtuous.
In this example, to know if someone is truly virtuous, you have to know their inner
motivations. If a man refrains from robbing a bank, his lack of robbing the bank doesn’t
mean that his inaction comes from a place of virtue. It could be that this man doesn’t rob
the bank simply because he is afraid of being caught and spending a large portion of his life
in prison.
Refraining from robbing the bank makes this person a law-abiding citizen, but it doesn’t
say anything about his virtue, not really. You can’t really judge someone’s virtue by
watching what he doesn’t do; you have to watch what he does do. It is his actual actions and
words that reveal his true character, and thus his virtues or lack thereof.
Aristotle goes on to point out that, “Virtue itself is not enough; there must also be the
power to translate it into action.” This is a very important point for the man on the path of
the warrior lifestyle. It is not good enough to develop all the virtues that I discuss in Modern
Bushido; you have to actually put them into action.
I started this chapter off with an analogy about planting a garden, so I will continue with
the garden analogy. Even if you removed all the weeds, prepared the soil perfectly, planted
the seeds, and took care of the plants until you had lots of vegetables, it would all be for
nothing if you didn’t harvest and use the vegetables. The same principle applies to the
development of virtue in your life.
If you cleanse your mind, study hard, meditate, and develop many wonderful virtues, what
good does all of that do you if you don’t use those virtues in your life? Warriors have a duty
to help other people. Once you have developed virtue in your life, use your virtue and your
knowledge to help those around you. Translate your virtue into action, as Aristotle said.
Making the virtues of the warrior lifestyle a part of your life is not merely for your own
benefit. The true warrior will work to make his life a life of excellence, and will also strive
to be able to use the traits of the warrior lifestyle to help other people. The same goes for
your martial arts skills. Are you learning your self-defense skills only as a means to keep
yourself safe or do you feel a duty to use those skills to defend those who are weaker than
you and who need someone to defend them? The true warrior will feel a duty to help and
protect those around him. As Robert L. Humphrey stated in The Warrior Creed:
Wherever I go,
everyone is a little safer because I am there.
Wherever I am,
anyone in need has a friend.
Whenever I return home,
everyone is happy I am there.

Mr. Humphrey’s sentiments in his poem are a great example of his virtue being put into
action to help others.
Epictetus said that the product of virtue is tranquility. When you live your life with
integrity and virtue, and with the kind of attitude that is expressed in The Warrior’s Creed,
you will find that you will indeed live a tranquil life. The tranquility that comes from
leading a virtuous life comes from knowing that you are living life as it should be lived. You
have a clear conscience because you constantly strive to make your decisions based on
what is right and what is wrong.
I will end this chapter with a great summary of virtue from Baltasar Gracian who described
virtue as follows:
For virtue is the bond of all the perfections, and the heart of all life’s satisfactions. It makes a man sensible, alert,
far-seeing, understanding, wise, courageous, considerate, upright, joyous, welcomed, truthful, and a universal
idol…Virtue is the sun of our lesser world, the sky over which is a good conscience. It is so beautiful, that it finds
favor of God, and of man. There is nothing lovely without virtue…for virtue is the essence of wisdom, and all else is
folly: capacity and greatness must be measured in terms of virtue…Virtue alone is sufficient unto itself, and it, only,
makes a man worth loving in life and in death, worth remembering.

Meditations on Virtue

Follow the path of virtue.


The virtuous rest in bliss in this world and in the next.
The Dhammapada
If you follow virtue for your mean, and strive to do virtuous
deeds, you need not envy those that are born of Princes and
great men, for blood is inherited, but virtue is achieved.
Cervantes
The superior man thinks of virtue;
the small man thinks of comfort.
Confucius
A noble spirit will seek the reward of virtue in
the consciousness of it, rather than in popular opinion.
Pliny the Younger
It’s quite possible to be a good man
without anyone realizing it.
Marcus Aurelius
Because of the diverse conditions of humans,
it happens that some acts are virtuous to some people,
as appropriate and suitable to them, while the same acts
are immoral for others, as inappropriate to them.
Saint Thomas Aquinas
He who wants to keep his garden tidy
doesn’t reserve a plot for weeds.
Dag Hammerskjold
Although the Tao holds no favoritism or partiality,
it always supports those who are naturally virtuous.
Lao Tzu
Virtue alone is sufficient unto itself, and it, only, makes a
man worth loving in life, and in death, worth remembering.
Baltasar Gracian
Virtue is a state of war, and to live in it
we have always to combat with ourselves.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Virtue is more clearly shown in the performance of fine
actions than in the nonperformance of base ones.
Aristotle
Virtue shows itself in the lowest
as well as in the sublimest things.
Confucius
A truly virtuous person cannot be indifferent
to the troubled world in which he lives…
Lao Tzu
Nature does not bestow virtue; to be good is an art.
Seneca
A virtuous man concentrates on his own work,
not that of others.
Zengzi

Chapter 4
Correct Thought
The Mind of the Warrior
Thought: The act or process of thinking; reflection; meditation; the power of reasoning;
intellect; imagination; attention; consideration; mental engrossment.
Correct thought is vital to the warrior lifestyle. Basically all religious teachings, teachings
from the sages, and wisdom literature from throughout the world, emphasize the
importance of controlling your mind and the thoughts which you entertain or dwell upon.
Learning to think rationally and control your mind is of utmost importance to the warrior.
Without mastering the art of thought control (your own, not someone else’s), it is virtually
impossible to successfully live the warrior lifestyle to the fullest. Yes, it is that important.
Blaise Pascal stated that, “The whole dignity of man is in thought.” When you really stop
and think about it, that is true. It is not your actions which make you honorable or dignified.
While it is true that your actions are very important, your actions can be deceptive. Actions,
which appear honorable to those around you, can have alternative motives which are only
known to you.
It is your thoughts and intentions which actually make your actions honorable or
dishonorable. Your thoughts ultimately determine your actions. Inappropriate or
dishonorable actions are the result of inappropriate or dishonorable thoughts. Thoreau
stated, “Thought is the sculptor who can create the person you want to be.” Self-help guru,
Wayne Dyer, echoes this thought saying, “Your thoughts are the source of virtually
everything in your life.”
Unless you learn to control your thoughts, you will never be able to control your actions;
and if you can’t control your actions, you are walking on thin ice. It is vital that you learn to
control your mind and think rationally. In order to understand how your thoughts work, it
is useful to understand a little about what your thoughts actually are.
The philosopher, Ralph Waldo Trine, taught what physicists are now proving, “Thoughts
are forces.” Your thoughts actually have energy and power; they are not merely innocent,
meaningless gibberish in your mind. Emerson stated, “There is no thought in any mind, but
it quickly tends to convert itself into a power.” He went on to say, “Every thought you
entertain is a force that goes out; and every thought comes back laden with its kind.”
Your thoughts affect many things in your life from your emotions to your actions, and in
order for you to act correctly, you have to think correctly. This is not some New Age
mumbo-jumbo. A major part of the Buddhist religion is the Eightfold Path. Each part of the
Eightfold Path can ultimately be traced back to controlling your thoughts. Buddha
understood, over 2,500 years ago, that to live a successful life, you have to learn to control
your mind. This is one reason that meditation is such a major part of the Buddhist religion.
Buddha taught, “The mind is everything. What you think, you become.”
As I mentioned, modern science is now proving that your thoughts are actual forces and
they have energy. This can now be measured. The bestselling book, The Secret by Rhonda
Byrne, explores this in detail. I recommend that you read this book, if you haven’t already.
In this book, it is explained that your thoughts have a frequency, and different types of
thoughts have different frequencies that can have different effects on your life.
I have used the garden analogy to make my points many times in Modern Bushido, and it is
also a helpful analogy to use in order to help you understand how your thoughts work and
why what you think is very important. Teachings from throughout the ages have taught
that your thoughts affect your life. Sometimes your thoughts have an immediate effect on
your life, but the majority of the time, thoughts take time to manifest and to become
tangible.
Imagine that your mind is your garden and your thoughts are seeds which you plant. If you
prepare the soil (your mind), plant the seeds that you want to grow (correct thoughts),
water those seeds (focus on your correct thoughts, keep your garden weeded (rid your
mind of negative, dishonorable thoughts), and continue to faithfully tend to your garden
(be consistent with this process), those seeds will mature and you will harvest the fruits of
your labor (your thoughts will materialize).
Just like growing vegetables in your garden, this process takes time; it doesn’t happen
overnight. No one plants a garden one day, then harvests vegetables the next day. It simply
doesn’t work that way. It takes time and work for a seed to mature into a plant, and for the
plant to produce fruit. Your mind works the same way. First you have to prepare the soil
(cleanse your mind and get your attitude right), then you have to plant the seeds (the
thoughts that you want to manifest).
Many people read about this process, get excited about the prospects of putting this
technique into action, and then forget about it after a couple of days or weeks. This is like
planting a garden, taking care of it for a few days and then forgetting about it or even
worse, deciding that gardening doesn’t really work and digging the seeds up and throwing
them away. Once you plant your seeds, you have to water your seeds and work to keep the
weeds out of the garden so those seeds can grow.
If you don’t follow through by giving your garden water and fertilizer, and keeping the
weeds from choking your plants, your garden will not produce the results that you want.
This is not to say that your garden will not grow anything. If you leave it up to chance, you
will find that your garden will have plants growing in it, but those plants will be
undesirable plants such as noxious weeds, instead of the plants which produce useful,
nutritious food that strengthen your mind and body.
This is how your mind works also. If you decide to mindfully take control of your thoughts
in order to start manifesting the virtues and character traits that you desire, but you give
up on the process after a couple of weeks or months, you will find that the mental weeds
will overrun the garden of your mind. Any garden, no matter how beautiful, will regress to
nothing more than a patch of weeds if it is not continually taken care of. It doesn’t matter
how well established it may be or how long it has been growing, if the gardener quits
tending to it, it will soon be overrun with weeds.
Controlling your thoughts and being mindful is a daily process. It is not an objective in
which you achieve your goal and then move on to another project. It is an ongoing, never-
ending part of the warrior lifestyle. The day you decide that you no longer have to be aware
of your thoughts, is the day you start to regress. Hopefully by now you are starting to see
why it is so important for the true warrior to pay attention to his thoughts.
Your thoughts control your emotions and ultimately, your actions. The warrior cannot
afford to allow his thought processes to be controlled by his emotions; he must control his
emotions, not the other way around. Rational thought has to be the way of the warrior. Sai
Baba taught that you must, “Control your mind and remain undisturbed. That is the secret
of perfect peace.” This is also the secret of maintaining your control as a warrior.
Marcus Aurelius wrote in his wonderful book, Meditations, “The things you think about
determine the quality of your mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts.” If you
allow your emotions to control your thoughts, then there will be times when you are
allowing anger, fear, passion, and frustrations to affect your actions. This can get you into
some major trouble. The warrior must not allow himself to be controlled by emotions such
as these. He has to make sure that his actions are guided by rational thought – not
emotions.
Takuan Soho, the 17th century Zen master, pointed out that, “The mind deludes itself. In
matter of the mind, you must stay on your guard.” This is very true. It is very easy for your
mind to justify things in order to see things as you want them to be, instead of the way
things truly are. You have to guard against this and always think rationally, seeing things as
they are, instead of the way that you wish they were. As the Roman poet, Horace, explained,
“Rule your mind, or it will rule you.”
When you allow your emotions to control your thoughts, you are essentially allowing your
mind to rule you instead of you ruling your mind. Emotions can cause strong feelings and
thoughts, and they have to be controlled. W. Clement Stone wrote, “When we direct our
thoughts properly, we can control our emotions.” This is essential for the warrior. Acting on
emotional impulse is seldom a wise choice. If you dwell on certain emotions, your thoughts
will sooner or later turn into actions. Lao Tzu warned against this saying, “Be careful of
your thoughts; they are the beginning of your acts.”
As you can see, taking control of your thoughts and your mind is not as simple as it may
sound. It is easy for self-help gurus to tell people to control their thoughts and manifest
what they want in their lives, but it is much harder to do this than these experts make it
sound. It takes a lot of effort, concentration, and diligence to cultivate your mind and
control your thoughts, but it is worth the effort.
I already mentioned the fact that science is proving that your thoughts are forces and have
frequencies and energy that can be measured. Essentially, what you focus on will
eventually manifest in your life. This is another reason that the warrior must continually
monitor his thoughts, especially thoughts which he allows his mind to continually dwell on
day in and day out. If you do not want something to manifest in your life, don’t allow your
mind to dwell on it.
Wayne Dyer teaches that, “Every thought you have can be assessed in terms of whether it
strengthens or weakens you.” This is something else that science is proving. Your thoughts
can directly affect your body. Martial artists know that their thoughts play a big part in
what they can accomplish in the arts. If you think that you can’t do a kick or that you can’t
defeat a certain opponent, your mind and body will respond to that thought. If you doubt
this, test it out in the weight room. See if you can feel a difference in your weight training
between days when your mind is focused and days when it is preoccupied with outside
thoughts.
Bodybuilders know how important a focused mind is to their overall training results.
Arnold Schwarzenegger wrote in his comprehensive bodybuilding book, The Encyclopedia
of Modern Bodybuilding, “The body will never fully respond to your workouts until you
understand how to train the mind as well. The mind is a dynamo, a source of vital energy.
That energy can be negative and work against you, or you can harness it to give yourself
unbelievable workouts and build a physique that lives up to your wildest expectations.”
Schwarzenegger went on to say, “When the going gets tough, it is always the mind that fails
first, not the body.”
It is important for the warrior to keep his mind focused on the things which strengthen him
rather than weaken him. Maintain your mental balance and don’t let the daily aggravations
and stresses unbalance your mind. Negative, stressful thoughts weaken you, while positive
thoughts strengthen you. You can look at your thoughts as your inner pep talk. This inner
conversation with yourself can make you powerful or weak, happy or unhappy, confident
or unconfident. Never forget that your thoughts are powerful forces.
As with all powerful forces, they can be used either to help you or used against you. The
good news is that when it comes to your thoughts, you are the only person who is in
control. Thus it is you who makes the decision concerning whether your thoughts will
strengthen you and move you towards your goals, or whether they will work against you
and weaken you.
Thoughts of anger, hate, resentment, revenge, and unforgiveness, which most likely include
all of the other four emotions, are all thoughts which will weaken you and work against
you. Although I do not have room to go into the subject of unforgiveness in this chapter, it is
a subject that would serve you well to do some reading on if you find that this is an area
that you have a problem with in your life. Unforgiveness can be like a hidden pool of
quicksand on the path of the warrior lifestyle; once you step into it, you are basically stuck
in that spot until you get out of it and leave it behind you.
I mentioned earlier that ultimately it is your thoughts that make you honorable or
dishonorable. It is the intention behind your actions which determine if your actions are
honorable or dishonorable, and your intention comes from your thoughts. An action which
seems right to outside observers, but which originates from dishonorable intentions, is not
an honorable action, even if there is nothing inherently wrong with the action itself. This
can be a little hard for most people to grasp, but it is very important to true warriors who
take their honor seriously.
In order for an action to truly be good or right, the thought behind it must be right. In
essence, things have to be right on the inside for them to truly be right on the outside. You
can’t do wrong right, but you can do right wrong. The intention behind your action makes
all the difference in the world. People may judge you on the outcome, but your honor does
not depend on the outcome, but rather on the intention behind your action.
If your mind is right and your intentions are honorable, you can rest easy knowing that you
have acted honorably, no matter what happens. A conscience free from guilt leads to
tranquility of the mind, and only a tranquil mind can see things as they truly are. This is one
of the benefits of meditation. By quieting the mind through meditation, you are better able
to think rationally and clear the fog that can sometimes cloud the mind. Not only should the
warrior learn to meditate as part of his quest to learn to control his mind, but he should
also meditate on what he wants to manifest in his life through his thought processes.
The important thing to understand from this chapter is that your thoughts are extremely
important. They play a major part in either the success or the failure of everything that you
do. You can literally change your world by changing your thoughts. Napoleon Hill wrote,
“We are the master of our fate, the captains of our souls, because we have the power to
control our thoughts.” There are many things outside of the realm of your control, but your
thoughts are one thing that you have total control over. You dictate your path by
controlling your thoughts.

Meditations on Correct Thought

Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their


minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.
William James
We are what we think. All that we are arises with
our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.
Buddha
Understand that what you think about expands.
Wayne Dyer
The superior man is committed to focus.
Hsun Tzu
When we direct our thoughts properly,
we can control our emotions.
W. Clement Stone
Only in quiet waters things mirror
themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet
mind is adequate perception of the world.
Margolis
Your thoughts create your reality because your thoughts
determine how you respond to situations in your daily life.
Wayne Dyer
What the mind of man can conceive and believe,
the mind of a man can achieve.
Napoleon Hill
Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.
Thomas Mann
The things you think about determine the quality of your
mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts.
Marcus Aurelius
Whatever you think, be sure it is what you think.
T. S. Eliot
Be careful of your thoughts;
they are the beginning of your acts.
Lao Tzu
To return, time after time,
to the same annoyance,
is a sort of insanity.
Baltasar Gracian
Deliberate often – decide once.
Latin proverb
The whole dignity of man is in thought.
Labor then to think right.
Pascal
Change your thoughts, and you change your world.
Norman Vincent Peale

Chapter 5
Right Actions
The Warrior’s Building Blocks
Action: The doing of something; behavior; habitual conduct; habitual activity characterized
by energy and boldness
Emerson stated that, “A man’s action is only a picture book of his creed.” Your actions do
indeed show to the world who you truly are as a person, and what your inner beliefs and
philosophy are. Your behavior is constantly revealing something about you to those whom
you interact with throughout your life. As F. D. Huntington said, “What a man does, tells us
what he is.” For this reason, it is vitally important to think before you act and carefully
consider all of your actions.
The philosophy, that your actions reveal the true you, has been taught throughout the ages,
from some of the earliest wisdom teachings right up to the present day. Ptah-Hotep taught
this, as did Jesus and Lao Tzu. The fact that men of honor should carefully consider their
actions and act appropriately, according to their own code of honor, is universally accepted,
but seems to be taken less than seriously, especially in today’s society. Although most
people don’t seem to take their actions seriously anymore, the warrior doesn’t live like
most people. He knows how important it is to carefully consider his every action.
As I discussed in the last chapter, your actions begin with your thoughts, so it is vital that
you control your mind and your emotions or you will never be able to control your actions.
If you allow your mind to run wild, entertaining any and every thought that pops into your
head, then your actions will follow along, and you will find that you are randomly doing
whatever, without giving your actions much thought at all.
The same goes for allowing your emotions to control your actions. The man who acts
according to his emotions, instead of giving his actions rational thought, will find that he is
constantly behaving in ways which are contrary to who he truly wants to be. Allowing
emotions such as fear, anger, frustration, hate, envy, or jealousy to control your actions is
only asking for trouble, and will damage your reputation and disrupt your goals on your
quest to become a true warrior. You must take steps to control both your thoughts and
your emotions in order to ensure that your actions are right.
This is the first step toward acting correctly in every circumstance. You must get your mind
right before you can possibly make your actions right. As Ashley Montagu pointed out, “The
only measure of what you believe is what you do. If you want to know what people believe,
don’t read what they write, don’t ask what they believe, just observe what they do.” Actions
originate from your thoughts, so learning to control your thoughts and thinking rationally,
instead of emotionally, is the foundation of right actions.
Others can see what you truly believe by how you act. Jesus taught, “You will know them by
their fruits.” John Locke echoed this thought saying, “The actions of men are the best
interpreters of their thoughts.” It is easy for someone to profess to believe in a certain
philosophy, but it is their actions which serve as proof of either what they truly believe, or
how seriously they believe what they espouse.
The true warrior should walk the walk, not merely talk the talk. It is easy to say you believe
in the virtues and traits of the warrior lifestyle, but it takes more than a verbal
pronouncement of these virtues to actually live the lifestyle; you have to make these virtues
and traits an active part of your life. In short, your actions have to coincide with your
professed beliefs. There is an old Chinese proverb which states, “To talk good is not to be
good; to do good, that is being good.” This is very true.
The warrior’s words will correspond with his actions, and his actions will correspond with
his words. Lao Tzu taught, “The Universal Way is not just a matter of speaking wisdom, but
one of continual practice.” This could also be said of living the warrior lifestyle. It is not a
matter of talking about all the things which make the warrior lifestyle a great way to live,
you actually have to live it – practice it.
You don’t live the warrior lifestyle to impress others; you live the warrior lifestyle because
of a personal decision to live a life of excellence. You don’t do the right thing for any kind of
personal reward or to impress those around you; you do the right thing simply because it is
right. The warrior does what he knows is right according to his own code of honor, without
worrying about what others think about it. He knows that he alone is responsible for his
actions, no one else.
The Hadith states, “Do what you should do when you should do it; don’t do what you
shouldn’t do; and when it is unclear, wait until you are more sure.” This is good advice for
the warrior. Although this is pretty simple and straightforward advice, it is not always so
simple to figure out what you should do and what you shouldn’t do. Again, this requires
thought, and to make the right decisions, you have to spend time making sure your mind is
right. Remember, for things to be right on the outside, they first have to be right on the
inside. If you aren’t thinking rationally, there is a very good chance that your decisions will
be off kilter.
Thinking before you act is not enough, you must think rationally and correctly before you
act. Misguided, emotional thoughts will lead to bad decisions and bad actions. Marcus
Aurelius taught that you should, “Say and do everything according to the soundest reason.”
This is another maxim which is universally taught throughout the world.
So, what should you do if you really do not know what to do in a certain situation? Wait and
meditate until you do know what you should do. Bodhidharma, the 6th century Buddhist
monk and Zen patriarch, stated, “If you’re not sure, don’t act.” This is good advice for the
warrior. You don’t have to make a snap decision. Wait until you know what the right action
is in your spirit, then act. Pythagoras stated you should, “Consult and deliberate before you
act, that you may not commit foolish actions.”
Of course there will be times when you do not have the luxury of meditating on what you
should do before you make a decision. It is because of this that you should be doing daily
meditation and studying in order to be able to make the right decision when you find
yourself in a situation which requires you to act immediately. You have to be prepared
ahead of time to make the right decision in these instances.
How do you do this? How do you ensure that you will be prepared to make the right
decision when you do not have time to spend hours or days determining the right move?
You make the virtues and traits of the warrior lifestyle a part of you through constant study
and integration of them in your life. By understanding what you stand for and what you
know is right, you are much better prepared to deal with life’s curve balls when they are
thrown at you.
You wouldn’t wait until some mugger attacks you, before you start preparing to defend
yourself. That would be silly. Martial artists spend years training and learning the art of
self-defense in order to be prepared, should they ever need to use their skills. The same
goes for your decision making skills. You have to study and prepare your mind to make the
right decision before you are face to face with an important choice. Study the teachings of
the wise men from throughout history. My book, Wisdom of the Elders, is an excellent aid to
help you prepare your mind to make the right decisions throughout life.
Another factor that determines whether your actions are right or wrong is the intention
behind your actions. Your intentions should be sincere and pure. Sheikh Muzaffer stated,
“The first duty is to behave with purity of intention. It should never be forgotten that every
deed and every action is judged according to the intention behind it.”
This doesn’t mean that you need to disclose your intentions or your motives to everyone
else; that is not always a wise decision. What it does mean is that you should be making
your decisions based on what is right and what is wrong. La Rochefoucauld, in his great
book, Maxims, wrote, “We should often blush at our noblest deeds if the world were to see
all their underlying motives.” This should never be said of the true warrior.
The warrior’s motives should be based on honor and doing what is right. Although you
don’t always want to disclose the motives behind your actions, ideally, you should never be
ashamed of those motives because they will come from a place of honor and integrity.
Many times, people will not understand your actions, but this is not your problem. La
Rochefoucauld went on to write, “A countless number of acts that appear foolish have
secret motives that are very wise and weighty.”
Your objective is not for everyone to understand your actions, or the intentions behind
your actions, only that your actions are honorable and right. People will read what they will
into your actions. To quote La Rochefoucauld again, “Our actions are like rhymes: anyone
can fit them in to mean what he likes.” People will believe what they want to believe. What
someone else thinks or believes about your actions shouldn’t concern you. Remember what
Marcus Aurelius wrote, “It is quite possible to be a good man without anyone realizing it…I
do what is mine to do; the rest doesn’t disturb me.”
Concern yourself more with what is right, have the courage to act on what you know is
right, and leave others to believe what they will. Focus on your own actions, not the actions
of others. Yes, there will be times when you have to respond to what others do, but when
you do respond, always do so from the standpoint of what is right. As Takuan Soho taught,
“Each action of the warrior is performed from a place of fundamental wisdom…it is
completely different from the ordinary behavior of a fool. Even if it looks the same, it is
different on the inside.”
How can an action look the same as what some unthinking, moron does and yet not be the
same? The answer is because it is different on the inside. This means that it comes from a
place of honor and integrity. It doesn’t matter what it looks like to others, it matters what
the intention is behind the action. Remember this and make sure your intentions are
always honorable and originate from a place of integrity.
To do this, you must first understand your objectives and your motivations. Marshall
Ferdinand Foch stated, “In whatever position you find yourself determine first your
objective.” Guan Yin Tzu also taught this reasoning stating, “The secret of success is before
attempting anything, be very clear about why you are doing it.” If you don’t know your
objective or the purpose behind your action, how can you possibly know if your actions are
right? You must know why you are doing what you are doing, and what you want to
accomplish with your actions. Your objective determines your actions.
Why are you learning martial arts? Why do you spend hours each week practicing self-
defense? Why do you want to live the warrior lifestyle? Why is meditating important to
you? These are all important questions for you to ask yourself. It is vitally important for
you to be clear on why you do what you do. If you don’t have a clear picture of what you
want, and you don’t really understand why it is important for you to continue to work to
achieve your goals, you will find that it will be much harder to keep yourself motivated.
Having a deep understanding, concerning why you are doing what you do, is vital to
keeping you on track. This is like having a roadmap that guides you to where you want to
go, and this roadmap also helps guide you concerning what you should and should not do.
There are certain actions which will bring you closer to your goals and other actions which
will take you further away from your goals. Keeping your mind focused on what is
important to you helps you determine which actions are which.
In addition to knowing what you should and should not do, you also want to pay attention
to how you perform your deeds. Swami Sivananda taught that you should, “Put your heart,
mind, intellect, and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret to success.”
Multitasking may be a part of life today, but it is not the best way to get things done,
especially if you are interested in excellence. There is a Zen maxim that states, “When
walking, walk. When eating, eat.” This means that you should focus on the task at hand.
Whatever you are doing, do it to the best of your ability – do it well.
The warrior puts his whole heart into his actions whether he is working out or planting a
garden. He is a man of excellence and this should be evident in his every action. Do one
thing at a time, do it well, then focus on something else. I like what John W. Gardner wrote,
“Do ordinary things extraordinarily well.” This quote is one that every warrior should
meditate on and keep in mind.
Confucius taught, “By nature, men are nearly alike; by practice, they get to be wide apart.” It
is your actions which set you apart from ordinary men and make you a superior man. Anne
Byrhhe wrote, “Every action we take, everything we do, is either a victory or defeat in the
struggle to become what we want to be.” Your actions matter. You have to start from where
you are and begin to transform your actions (if your actions haven’t been what they should
be). Lao Tzu wrote, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.”
It doesn’t matter what you have done in the past; you can always start anew where your
actions are concerned. Start to act like the man of honor that you want to be, today. Always
remember, everything you do, everything you think, and everything you say, has some
consequence in your life, or the lives of others. You can do wrong, not only by your actions,
but by your inactions, and you are responsible for both. Moliere wrote, “It is not only what
we do, but also what we do not do, for which we are accountable.”
Doing nothing is also an action; not making a decision is making a decision. Everything you
do is an action, even if it is the action of inaction. By deciding not to workout, but instead to
take the afternoon off and sit in front of the television, you are still acting. Watching
television is an action. Taking a nap is an action. Everything that you do is some type of
action. Whenever you decide not to do one thing, you are deciding to do something else.
This is true even if what you decide to do is nothing. Doing nothing is in fact doing
something.
What the warrior should always be concerned with is whether his actions are right or
wrong. Always use your sense of honor to determine the correct course of action, and
remember, as Plutarch pointed out, “Not even the gods can undo what has been done.” You
can’t go back and change the past; all you can do is start to do right, right now, this very
moment. Starting now, strive to make your every action right, according to your own code
of honor.

Meditations on Right Actions

First say to yourself what you would be;


and then do what you have to do.
Epictetus
Every man is the sum of his own works.
Cervantes
If the heart is right the deeds will be right.
Japanese Proverb
Let your words correspond with your
actions and your actions with your words.
Confucius
A man’s action is only a picture book of his creed.
Emerson
Every action we take, everything we do, is either a victory
or defeat in the struggle to become what we want to be.
Anne Byrhhe
When walking, walk. When eating, eat.
Zen Maxim
A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.
Lao Tzu
Our grand business is not to see what lies dimly at
a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand.
Thomas Carlyle
The success of very important matters often depends on
doing or not doing something that seems trivial. Even in
little things, therefore, you must be cautious and thoughtful.
Francesco Guicciardini
Never refuse or hesitate to take steps against
impending dangers…because you think they are too late.
Since things often take much longer than expected,
because of their very nature and because of the various
obstacles they encounter, it very often happens that the
steps you have omitted to take, thinking they would have
been too late, would have been in time.
Francesco Guicciardini
We should often blush at our noblest deeds if
the world were to see all their underlying motives.
La Rochefoucauld
Consult and deliberate before you act,
that you may not commit foolish actions.
Pythagoras
It is not only what we do, but also what we
do not do, for which we are accountable.
Moliere

Chapter 6
Correct Speech
The Words of the Warrior
Speech: the act of speaking; expression or communication of thoughts and feelings by spoken
words; the manner of speaking; that which is spoken; utterance, remark, statement, talk,
conversation.
Your speech is how you communicate with others. It is how you allow others to know your
feelings and thoughts. In essence, your speech, along with your actions, is the only way that
other people can judge you and your character. For this reason, among others, it is very
important that you keep a close watch over what you say and how you say it. Yes, how you
express yourself can be just as important as what you say. Your attitude and tone can tell
someone as much about what you are communicating as your actual words. As the Viking
book of wisdom, The Havamal, states, “Man by his speech is known to men.”
After your actions, your speech is the most important factor in how people see you as a
person. This is why it is important for the warrior to take some time to think about the way
he wants his speech to portray him as a man of character, the pitfalls to be aware of, and
the factors which can help ensure that his speech is an asset instead of a liability in his
quest to perfect himself on his journey to become a superior man. The key part of that last
sentence is the word “think.”
Always think before you speak. The Buddhist philosopher, Nagarjuna, stated, “Those who
speak with discretion are respected by mankind.” So according to Nagarjuna, discretion in
your speech is the key to being respected by others. This means that you have to give some
thought to your words before you allow them to come out of your mouth. Think about what
you are going to say, how it will be received by those who are listening to you, even those
that you may not be aware are listening, and your purpose in speaking, all before you start
talking.
It is not necessary or advantageous to give your opinion about everything to everyone. It is
not your job to be a form of cheap entertainment for those around you. This is a trap that is
very easy to fall into and is the downfall of many people. While it is certainly okay to chat
with your buddies or other people about meaningless things in order to be affable, you
should be careful of your conversation even on such relaxed occasions. It is all too easy to
get carried away with your conversation and express opinions which can be offensive and
used against you at a later time. Be genial and social, but at the same time be aware and
thoughtful concerning your private beliefs.
Even if you are talking to people who you consider harmless and well-intentioned, you
never know how your words will be taken or to whom they will be repeated. It is always
good policy to carefully monitor your speech, even when chatting with friends. Francesco
Guicciardini stated, “Unless you are forced by necessity, be careful in your conversations
never to say anything which, if repeated, might displease others. For often, at times and in
ways you could never foresee, those words may do you great harm. In this matter, I warn
you, be very careful. Even prudent men go wrong here, and it is difficult not to.”
Confucius also taught the importance of watching what you say. He pointed out, “For one
word a man is often deemed to be wise, and for one word he is often deemed to be foolish.
We should be careful indeed of what we say.” You will notice that neither Confucius nor
Guicciardini made an exception concerning when you are talking to friends or enemies, or
when you are talking in private or in public. They simply warned us to be very careful when
it comes to your speech.
If you will remember, I wrote that it is not only your words which are important, but also
your tone and how you speak, that should be taken into account. Speech is simply how you
communicate with others, and there is much more that goes into this communication than
simple words. Meanings can be communicated through other means as well, such as
gestures, tone, and the overall way that you say what you are saying.
Someone can say something to you such as, “How nice for you,” and it can mean something
other than he is happy for you, depending on how he says it. A sarcastic tone could indicate
that he is jealous of you or is upset with you, whereas, if it is stated in a sincere manner, it
probably means exactly what the words state. How you say something is just as important
as what you say, or at least fairly close. John Wayne gave some good advice concerning this
when he said, “Talk low, talk slow, and don’t say too much.”
Ben Johnson stated that, “Talking and eloquence are not the same: to speak, and to speak
well, are two different things. A fool may talk, but a wise man speaks.” You do not have to
be loud and obnoxious to get your point across. In fact, speaking in a loud, angry tone, while
sometimes necessary, is not the way to win over most people or to leave someone with a
favorable impression of yourself. Learn to use soft words, backed up with rational, hard
arguments. Nagarjuna taught, “The steadfast who speak in few words and politely are very
much respected by mankind.”
There is a time and a place for different kinds of speech, but there is never a time or a place
for thoughtless speech. Always think before you speak, no matter what the situation may
be. The trick is to watch and listen to your audience before you start speaking. Judge the
nature, character, and beliefs of those around you before you speak, then you are better
able to speak without stepping on their toes or making any comments which they may find
offensive and which may come back to cause you some grief at a later time.
Benjamin Franklin said, “Would you persuade, speak of interest, not of reason.” Don’t
expect everyone to understand things as well as you or to think rationally. Not everyone is
rational or has the capability to understand the warrior lifestyle and how you live your life,
but you can still carry on a nice, social conversation with them by speaking in terms of
things that they are interested in and allowing them to do most of the talking. You don’t
have to try to show everyone the error of their ways. Not only is this unwanted by the vast
majority of people, but it hardly ever works, and most people simply find that offensive.
You have to be smart and realize that not everyone thinks like you.
It is best to not speak about yourself. Get others to talk about themselves instead. People
love to talk about themselves and their lives. Nobody likes to talk to someone who is
obsessed with his own life and goes on and on about every detail of his “all-important” life,
with little or no interest in anybody or anything else. The key to being a good
conversationalist is to know how to get people talking about things which interest them.
There are several advantages to doing this. First, the other person will like talking to you
and will consider you a great conversationalist, even without you saying much. Also, you
are able to learn much more about someone when they are talking and sharing things, as
opposed to you doing so. It is always to your advantage to listen and learn instead of
talking, but this takes discipline and practice. It is human nature to want to add your two
cents to the conversation. Resist this urge unless there is some purpose in your adding to
the discourse.
Taisou taught, “One offensive word is enough to leave a permanent scar that may become a
seed for revenge.” It is so easy to allow your emotions to get involved during a conversation
and to permit yourself to vent your anger or frustrations through your words. While this
feels really good at the time, later it can come back to cause you many problems. It is just
not worth the risk or the stress of wondering if what you said will be used against you in
some way. When you resist the urge to spout off and express your opinion, you are
guaranteed not to have to deal with any adverse consequences of your speech at a later
time. As the Talmud teaches, “Your friend has a friend, and your friend’s friend has a friend;
be discreet.”
Even if you are speaking to someone who you consider close, it is wise to watch what you
say because it may be repeated or used against you somewhere down the road, when your
relationship may not be as close. Samuel Johnson explained the reason behind this well
when he wrote, “A man should be careful never to tell tales of himself to his own
disadvantage; people may be amused, and laugh at the time, but they will be remembered,
and brought up against him upon some subsequent occasion.”
Relationships change, just like everything else in this world. Someone you may be on
friendly terms with today may change his feelings towards you in the future and use things
you have disclosed to him against you. It is the safest policy not to disclose personal
information which can be used against you and to carefully watch what you say. Don’t
allow yourself to get carried away during any conversation.
This is especially important when you are highly emotional or angry. Always be extremely
careful and mindful of your words when you are angry. During periods of anger, your mind
will scream at you that, “It doesn’t care about the consequences; you should put this person
in his place.” It is during times like this that you have to take control of your emotions, and
your urge to let someone know exactly how you feel, and think rationally before you speak.
Never allow your negative emotions to control your tongue. Harsh words, combined with
poor reasoning, never settle anything; they only make things worse.
By being a man of few words and controlling your speech, you will be better assured of not
being thoughtless in your speech. La Rochefoucauld wrote, “As the stamp of great minds is
to suggest much in few words, so, contrariwise, little minds have the gift of talking a great
deal and saying nothing.” You want to conduct yourself as someone with a great mind,
whose words have meaning, not be seen as someone who continually chatters and says
nothing, or whose words are meaningless and should be taken with a grain of salt.
The warrior will carefully consider his speech, not simply to keep himself out of trouble,
but because his speech is a part of his character. It is best for the warrior to be more
introspective. He should communicate more with himself than with others, focusing on
making himself the best he can be, instead of being interested in the latest gossip. Confucius
taught, “A superior man is modest in his speech, but exceeds in his actions.” This should be
the goal of the warrior where speech is concerned. Be modest and sincere in your speech
and make sure your actions coincide with what you say.
The fundamental nature of the warrior is to say what you mean and mean what you say. In
order to do this, you have to be careful concerning what you say. Never promise to do
something if you don’t plan on doing it or cannot fulfill your promise. Shakespeare pointed
out that, “Things are often spoke and seldom meant.” This is the way of the average man,
but should not be the way of the warrior. When the warrior says something, he means it
and backs it up with his actions.
It is for this reason that he has to be careful not to say that he will do something simply to
please the person he is talking to. Don’t say you will do something then put it out of your
mind as if you never mentioned it. That is merely a way to destroy your reputation as a
man of character with those around you. You want to be known as a man of your word, a
man whose word is as good as gold, not someone who simply spouts off and doesn’t mean
what he says. People will take notice of this and will not take you seriously if you say things
and never back them up.
The same principle goes for exaggerating. When you relay a story or tell someone what you
have witnessed, don’t exaggerate. Baltasar Gracian explained exactly why you should not
exaggerate, stating, “Never exaggerate…avoid offending the truth, in part to avoid the
cheapening of your judgment. Exaggeration wastes distinction, and testifies to the paucity
of your understanding.” Essentially, when you exaggerate you are either lying to make your
words seem more important, or you are giving evidence that your judgment is not to be
trusted. Neither of these should be characteristics of the true warrior.
To avoid this, it is best to not talk about things which you are not sure about. Always
remember that your ignorance exceeds your knowledge. Don’t try to seem smarter or
better informed than you are by talking about things which you don’t understand or on
which you don’t have complete information. As Syrus taught, “Keep the golden mean
between saying too much and saying too little.” Trying to impress people by attempting to
appear better informed or better educated than you actually are, will usually come back to
embarrass you, as there is always someone out there who is better informed or better
educated than you on different subjects.
Instead of trying to impress people, simply be sincere and be yourself. If you do not know
something, keep your mouth shut, listen, and learn. Abraham Lincoln stated this principle
perfectly when he said, “It is better to keep one’s mouth shut and be thought a fool than to
open it and resolve all doubt.” Speaking about things which you don’t understand, as
though you are an expert on the subject, is a characteristic of a fool, not a characteristic of
the warrior.
C. J. Ducasse said, “To speak of mere words is much like speaking of mere dynamite.” By now
you should be starting to understand how important your speech and words are, and why
you should take pains to think carefully before you speak. Swami Shivananda stated that,
“He who has control over his tongue is greater than a hero in battle.” What he meant by this
statement is that it is extremely hard to perfect the trait of controlling your tongue. It is
human nature to like to talk, to brag, and to freely communicate one’s thoughts, but it is not
human nature to take control and carefully monitor your speech.
When in doubt about what to say, say nothing. Aesop stated, “In dangerous times wise men
say nothing.” This is always the safest policy when you are unsure what to say – simply
remain silent. There are many times when silence says much more than words can convey.
You are not obligated to respond to everyone simply because they would like you to. Many
times people try to set you up to say something that they can use against you. By remaining
silent, you both spoil their little trap and maintain your dignity and peace of mind.
Don’t let your tongue be your own worst enemy; learn to control your emotions and your
speech. It is always best to keep your private information secret. Don’t be too open or too
eager to share your personal thoughts. There is a time for speech and a time for silence, and
it is wisdom to know when it is time to speak and when it is time to remain silent. I will end
this chapter with some wisdom from a Latin proverb, “From a little spark may burst a
mighty flame.”

Meditations on Correct Speech


If the bird hadn’t sung, it wouldn’t have been shot.
Japanese Proverb
Keep the golden mean between saying
too much and saying too little.
Syrus
In times like these men should utter nothing for
which they would not be willingly responsible
through time and in eternity.
Abraham Lincoln
You always win by not saying
the things you don’t need to say.
Chinese Proverb
A superior man is modest in his speech,
but exceeds in his actions.
Confucius
Say but little, and say it well.
Irish Proverb
Eloquence resides no less in a person’s tone of voice,
expression, and general bearing than in his choice of words.
La Rochefoucauld
Of what does not concern you say nothing good or bad.
Italian Proverb
In dangerous times wise men say nothing.
Aesop
A gentle response allays wrath;
A harsh word provokes anger.
The Book of Proverbs
Think before you speak but do not speak all that you think.
Chinese Proverb
Both speech and silence transgress.
Zen Maxim
Unless you are forced by necessity, be careful in your
conversations never to say anything which, if repeated,
might displease others. For often, at times and in ways you
could never foresee, those words may do you great harm.
Francesco Guicciardini
Judge the nature of your listeners and speak accordingly.
Tiruvalluvar
Outside noisy, inside empty.
Chinese Proverb
You cannot talk to a frog in a well about the vast sea;
he is limited to his area of space.
A summer insect has no knowledge of snow;
it knows nothing beyond its own season.
Chiu Shu

Chapter 7
Wisdom
The Way of the Sage
Wisdom: the quality of being wise; power of judging rightly and following the soundest course
of action, based on knowledge, experience, understanding; good judgment; sagacity.
Wisdom is the quality of being wise. That is a pretty simplistic definition and is not very
helpful in understanding why wisdom is important to the warrior, but if you read the other
definitions, you begin to understand why wisdom is so important to the warrior lifestyle.
Wisdom enables the warrior to judge rightly and to follow the soundest course of action
based on knowledge and understanding. This encompasses exactly what the warrior needs
in order to live the warrior lifestyle in a world where good judgment is becoming a rarity.
The Roman philosopher, Cicero, agreed with the current definition of wisdom, stating, “The
function of wisdom is to discriminate between good and evil.” Thoreau wrote that, “It is a
characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things.” Both of these require understanding
and good judgment, which is exactly what wisdom provides for you. Without wisdom you
are basically shooting in the dark. It is vital for the warrior that he strives to obtain wisdom
and puts that wisdom to use in his life.
Buddha called wisdom the most precious of riches. The book of Proverbs says, “Get wisdom,
get understanding…Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will
watch over you. Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom.” This is good advice, but
exactly how does one become a wise man with a store of wisdom to guide him throughout
his life?
Like most things, which are valuable and worthwhile, wisdom requires effort and work.
Just as the fruit tree doesn’t produce fruit overnight, you can’t sit down with a book one day
and think that you will have obtained wisdom the next day. Actually, I guess you could read
a book one day and think that you have obtained wisdom the next day, but thinking that
you are wise and being wise are two different things. None of the traits found in Modern
Bushido are developed overnight; they all take discipline and the hand of time to develop.
The development of wisdom is no different.
So let’s get back to the question about how one obtains wisdom. If you look back at the
definition of wisdom, you will notice that it is based on knowledge, experience and
understanding. Knowledge is learning and can come from anyone or anything. Always be
open to learning from everything you read, everyone you meet, and everything you do.
Lord Chesterfield wrote, “There is hardly any place or any company where you may not
gain knowledge, if you please; almost everybody knows some one thing, and is glad to talk
about that one thing.”
Baltasar Gracian stated, “A man without knowledge, a world in darkness.” Knowledge is the
beginning of wisdom. Without some knowledge of how things work in this world, it is
impossible to have any understanding of how the world works, and therefore impossible to
develop wisdom. Sakya Pandit put it plainly when he said, “Of what use is a man who has
acquired little knowledge?”
The first step in developing wisdom is to become knowledgeable. Study and learn about
many different subjects, but especially about the subjects that can affect your life and the
lives of your loved ones. For the warrior, developing a vast array of knowledge is crucial,
especially knowledge that guides him on his journey through the warrior lifestyle. To be a
superior man, you must acquire as much knowledge as you possibly can. Never stop
learning.
Ramakrishna, the famous Indian mystic, stated, “He alone is truly a man who is illuminated
by the light of the true knowledge.” You must obtain true knowledge, not simply a bunch of
facts which you file away in your memory bank. Being able to recite hundreds of facts and
figures does you little good, unless you make a living on game shows. You have to be able to
put the knowledge which you acquire to use for it to be valuable in your life. This is where
understanding comes into play.
Understanding is the ability to truly comprehend or grasp the principles behind the subject
which you are learning. In essence, it is being able to put your knowledge to work. It is this
intellectual capacity to truly understand what you learn that makes it useful. Without a true
understanding of something, it is difficult to really benefit from it.
Of course there are exceptions to this statement. You don’t have to have a deep
understanding of how your refrigerator works in order to put a bottle of water in it and
keep it cold. But if your refrigerator quits working, you have to have a thorough
understanding of how it works in order to fix it. Only the man, who has acquired that
knowledge and knows how to put that knowledge to work, can successfully use his
understanding to fix the unexpected problem of his refrigerator not working correctly. This
applies to everything in life. You can get by with a little knowledge, but sooner or later,
knowledge without understanding will catch up with you and reveal your deficiency.
This same principle can be applied to your martial arts training. If you simply memorize
certain kicks or punches, that is basic knowledge. But in order to successfully use those
kicks or punches, you need to thoroughly understand the underlying principles behind
them. You need to know more than merely how to throw a punch or kick in the air. A true
understanding of the usefulness of the punch or kick would entail knowing where to place
it on your attacker’s body to stop him, how it feels to strike an actual person, an
understanding of the human anatomy, etc.
As you can plainly see, acquiring a deep understanding of a subject involves much more
than a rudimentary knowledge of the subject; it goes much deeper and gets down to the
actual principles behind the knowledge. To achieve a genuine comprehension of something,
you have to completely understand how and why it works. This applies to everything you
do, whether it is gardening or martial arts. And, to completely understand something, your
knowledge has to come from experience. You can’t completely understand anything by
simply reading about it or hearing about it from someone else – you have to experience it
for yourself.
Experience is the third part of acquiring wisdom. To thoroughly understand something,
you have to experience it for yourself. Don’t misunderstand; the wise man can learn
wisdom from other wise men. You don’t have to go out and experience everything in life in
order to understand that some things are good for you and some things are bad for you.
Only a fool doesn’t learn from others and believes that he has to experience everything for
himself.
For example, only an idiot would believe that he has to truly experience an actual
rattlesnake bite to truly understand that rattlesnake bites are dangerous. While it may be
true that the man who has lived through an actual rattlesnake bite, has a more thorough
understanding of what a rattlesnake bite feels like, that fact doesn’t mean that you have to
experience a snake bite to understand that you need to stay clear of rattlesnakes.
Be wise enough to acquire wisdom from those who know, without having to experience the
same mistakes for yourself. While there are many truths which you cannot truly
understand without experience, there are also many truths which can, and should, be
understood without personal experience. Learn from the experiences and mistakes of
others. Leonardo da Vinci taught, “Wisdom is the daughter of experience…Shun the
teachings of those speculators whose arguments are not confirmed by experience.”
He did not say you should never learn wisdom from others, or that you can’t acquire
wisdom from others, only that you should not listen to those whose arguments are not
backed up by experience. It is perfectly acceptable to learn wisdom from others as long as
that wisdom is based on proven experience. There are some things which you need to
experience in order to thoroughly understand, and other things which you can understand
by having the wisdom to listen and learn from those who truly know and who have
experienced certain things for themselves.
The key here is listening to those who truly know. There is a Swedish proverb which states,
“Where wisdom doesn’t go in, it doesn’t come out.” You can’t get water from a dry well. You
can acquire wisdom from another person if that person truly has wisdom to share with
you, but only if he actually has wisdom to share. Just as Leonardo da Vinci taught, he has to
have wisdom backed up by experience, or the experience of others which he has learned
from over the years.
Even then, it is not truly your wisdom until you internalize what you have learned from
someone else, or from your own experiences, and make it your wisdom. This requires that
you understand what you have learned from your studies and experiences. Montaigne, the
16th century French writer, wrote, “We can be knowledgeable with other men’s knowledge,
but we cannot be wise with other men’s wisdom.” You only become wise by developing
your own wisdom from what you learn and what you experience.
Kahlil Gibran, author of The Prophet, wrote, “Learn the words of wisdom uttered by the
wise and apply them in your own life. Live them – but do not make a show of reciting them,
for he who repeats what he does not understand is no better than an ass that is loaded with
books.” Once again, you can see that you cannot truly be wise until you understand what
you have learned and can apply it in your life.
Wisdom is available for everyone, but like everything else in this world, you have to work
for it. The 13th century Sufi mystic, Rumi, wrote, “Moonlight floods the whole sky from
horizon to horizon; how much it can fill your room depends on its windows.” Wisdom is
everywhere, but it is up to you how much you acquire. You have to be open to learning,
understanding, and applying wisdom in your life.
You have to apply your mind, and work to obtain wisdom. Sai Baba taught, “You must dive
deep into the sea to get the pearls. What good does it do to dabble among the waves near
the shore and assert that the sea has no pearls?” Just like fine pearls obtained from the
depths of the ocean, pearls of wisdom require you to put in the effort to find them and to
use them in your life.
Confucius taught that there are three methods of obtaining wisdom, “By three methods we
may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is the
easiest; and third, by experience, which is the bitterest.” Actually, as you go through life,
you will acquire wisdom by all three of these methods, if you are wise. If you aren’t wise,
you will have to rely only on your personal experiences for whatever wisdom you may
acquire, and this is a long, hard road.
The important thing is that you make the effort to acquire wisdom and apply that wisdom
in your life. As Epicurus stated, “We must not pretend to study philosophy, but really study
it; for it is not seeming healthy that we need, but true health.” Once again, it is important
not to merely talk the talk, but to walk the walk. Don’t go out and memorize a bunch of
quotes and then pretend to be a wise man. Like I said before, it does you no good to have a
brain full of facts or quotes that you can recite at will. All the wise sayings in the world are
useless to you if you don’t put them to work. You have to apply them to your daily life.
This is where self-reflection and meditation come into play. You have to reflect on your life
and evaluate the different areas of your life to see what changes need to be made. Then
apply the wisdom that you have learned in ways that improve your life and bring you
closer to the perfection of your character, which, if you will recall, is the main objective of
the warrior lifestyle. Self-reflection and meditation are how you incorporate wisdom into
your life.
Baltasar Gracian wrote, “Self-reflection is the school of wisdom.” You have to reflect on how
you can put wisdom to work in your life. It does not happen automatically; you have to
make the effort. Syrus went as far as to say, “Wisdom is acquired by meditation.” It is
during meditation and self-reflection that you quiet your mind and understand how to
apply wisdom in your life. This brings us back to the point that wisdom is not in words, but
rather in understanding and internalizing those words of wisdom.
All of the wise words and quotes in the world will not help you if you don’t truly
understand what the sages were trying to teach you through their teachings. As The
Hitopadesa, a book of Sanskrit wisdom, says, “Many can speak words of wisdom; few can
practice it themselves.” It is pretty useless to talk about wisdom without practicing it for
yourself. The true warrior has to make wisdom a part of his life. Without wisdom, the
warrior cannot make the right decisions that lead him to a successful life.
It takes wisdom to see the value in living the warrior lifestyle and the value in making all of
the traits of the warrior lifestyle an integral part of your life. Baltasar Gracian explained
that, “With men of understanding, wisdom counts for everything.” The reason for this is
that it takes wisdom to live as you should. Without wisdom, people do not see the
importance of living a life of excellence. To the foolish man, living the warrior lifestyle
appears to be a lot of work for nothing. Only the wise man can see the benefit in living the
life of the true warrior.
Even after one sees the benefit in living the warrior lifestyle, it still takes wisdom to do so
successfully. Once you have the desire to live a life of excellence, you still need the wisdom
to guide you to the fulfillment of that desire. Takuan Soho wrote, “Desires are brought to
life depending upon one’s wisdom. Wisdom gives direction to desires.”
Living the warrior lifestyle takes discipline and determination. It takes work and effort. It is
not about pretense or simply talking about all the benefits or character traits; it’s about
action. Seneca stated, “Wisdom does not show itself so much in precept as in life – in a
firmness of mind and mastery of appetite. It teaches us to do as well as talk; and to make
our actions and words all of a color.” This is ultimately what wisdom does for the warrior.
It guides him through life and shows him how to live.
But before you can count on wisdom guiding you correctly, you must spend the time to
acquire wisdom. Spend time studying the wisdom of the elders and meditate on the
meanings behind their teachings. It will be time well spent.

Meditations on Wisdom

Desires are brought to life depending upon one’s wisdom.


Wisdom gives direction to desires.
Takuan Soho
The plainest sign of wisdom is continual cheerfulness;
her state is like that of things in the regions above the moon,
always clear and serene.
Montaigne
Boasting begins where wisdom stops.
Japanese Proverb
Learn the words of wisdom uttered by the wise
and apply them in your own life. Live them –
but do not make a show of reciting them,
for he who repeats what he does not understand
is no better than an ass that is loaded with books.
Kahlil Gibran
A man may learn wisdom even from a foe.
Aristophanes
The height of human wisdom is to bring our tempers down
to our circumstances – and to make a calm within,
under the weight of the greatest storm without.
Daniel Defoe
True knowledge does not grow old,
so have declared the sages of all times.
The Pali Canon
Great doubts deep wisdom.
Small doubts little wisdom.
Chinese Proverb
You must dive deep into the sea to get the pearls.
What good does it do to dabble among the waves near
the shore and assert that the sea has no pearls?
Sai Baba
We learn wisdom from failure
much more than from success.
Samuel Smiles
All of the far-reaching, unfaded teachings of the
ancient sages come from the same source:
the subtle truth of great oneness.
Different expressions are merely the
result of different times and places.
Lao Tzu
Besides the noble art of getting things done,
there is the noble art of leaving things undone.
The wisdom of life consists in the
elimination of non-essentials.
Lin Yutang
Wisdom is not in words;
it is in understanding.
Rumi

Chapter 8
Honor
The Warrior’s Mark of Distinction
Honor: a keen sense of right and wrong; adherence to actions or principles considered right;
distinction; dignity; personal integrity; strong moral character or strength, and adherence to
ethical principles.
Honor is definitely the warrior’s mark of distinction. As you can see by the above definition
of honor, it overlaps many of the traits which I have already covered in Modern Bushido, but
at the same time, it is a different trait altogether. I have already discussed personal
integrity, moral character, and adherence to ethical principles, so the definitions of honor
that I will focus on is the keen sense of right and wrong and the adherence to actions or
principles considered right.
In the past, the warrior’s honor was considered something that had to be defended, even to
the death. Warriors fought duels to the death to defend what they declared to be an insult
to their honor or to put it in today’s terms, being disrespected. Noblemen and warriors,
both in the East and in the West, considered it part of their duty to defend their honor if
they felt that someone had disrespected them or challenged their honor in some way.
These men took drastic measures to defend their honor.
In many cases these duels were not about honor at all, but more about someone’s wounded
pride. To fight to the death over some misunderstanding, small disagreement, or perceived
insult is not truly defending your honor, but rather defending your pride. The vast majority
of these duels of honor were more about defending the man’s reputation, not his honor.
Nonetheless, honor is essential to living the warrior lifestyle.
It is honor and character that set the trained warrior apart from the common street thug.
Both the warrior and the thug have the capability of being dangerous. The difference is that
the true warrior’s honor dictates his actions, whereas the thug’s actions are dictated only
by his own selfish desires. Without honor, the warrior would be nothing more than another
dangerous thug walking the streets, but with better training in the ways of the martial arts.
As the definition above states, honor is the warrior’s sense of right and wrong, and his
dedication to living by the principles which he considers right and just. These principles are
his code of honor which he lives by and incorporates into his life. There is no specific
“honor code” for the warrior. Each man must decide for himself what his personal code of
honor entails, but the warrior’s code of honor must be based on the character traits of the
warrior lifestyle which are discussed in Modern Bushido.
Among these traits are courage, integrity, respect, and a strong sense of obligation and
justice. I have already discussed the importance of living your life with integrity, and I will
discuss the traits of courage, respect and justice in further detail later on in this book. So I
will start my discussion of honor with the subject of the warrior’s obligation, both to his
code of honor and to his fellow men.
One of the main parts of a warrior’s honor is his strong sense of obligation. It is the
warrior’s duty to recognize and fulfill his various obligations in life. The fulfillment of one’s
obligations seems to be forgotten by the majority of people in today’s society, thus this is
another trait which sets the true warrior apart from the average person. Most upstanding
people remember certain obligations in life such as providing for their family, but for many,
that is pretty much where their sense of obligation ends.
It is different for the warrior. Honor requires the warrior to take his sense of obligation
more seriously than the average man on the street. Not only does the warrior feel a strong
sense of responsibility for providing for his family, but he is also honor bound to fulfill his
various other obligations in life. At this point, you may be wondering what other
obligations the warrior has other than to be a good person and to provide for his family.
Actually, those are the obligations that everyone in a civilized society should adhere to; the
warrior’s obligations go much deeper because of his own personal code of honor.
One of the definitions of the word obligation is: “something that must be done because of a
moral duty.” The word duty is synonymous with the word obligation. The true warrior, who
takes his own personal code of honor seriously, has a duty to be true to his code. Part of
that code of honor is to fulfill his duty to his fellow men. A quick and easy way to look at
this duty to your fellow man is: whenever someone does something for you, no matter how
large or how small, you have a duty to repay the favor. Repaying the favor is your
obligation – it is as simple as that.
For example, if your neighbor spends the afternoon helping you hang cabinets in your
garage, then you owe him. By accepting his help on your garage project, you have assumed
a debt that you owe until you pay him back in a manner equal to the service he freely
provided for you. If someone lets you borrow his truck to haul something, you owe him a
debt and you should return his truck clean and fill the gas tank for him as a way of repaying
that debt.
It is pretty straightforward. When someone does something for you, you are in his debt
until you repay that debt by doing something of equal value for him. As I said, this is
something that the vast majority of people today pay very little attention to in their daily
lives. For most, they consider their obligation paid in full with a simple “thank you” and
then they quickly forget the matter altogether.
Saying “thank you” is not fulfilling your debt, it is merely being courteous. The true warrior
understands this and understands that he owes this person an obligation until he is able to
fulfill it in a manner equal to, or above and beyond, what this person did for him. To the
warrior, this is only right, and his sense of right and wrong is what his code of honor is all
about. This is where the warrior’s sense of justice comes into play.
Justice is simply the warrior’s dedication to doing what is right. As I discussed in the last
chapter, the warrior must have the wisdom to be able to make the distinction between
right and wrong, and then, he must have the courage to act on what is right. This is the
basis for the warrior’s code of honor. He must be utterly dedicated to what is right.
Sometimes, doing what is right will not be the same as doing what is easy or what is
profitable, but the warrior’s code of honor requires him to put what is right ahead of what
is easy or personally profitable.
Walter Lippmann wrote, “He has honor if he holds himself to an ideal of conduct though it
is inconvenient, unprofitable, or dangerous to do so.” This statement is a great description
of the warrior. It is for this reason that Mark Twain wrote, “Honor is a harder master than
the law.” There are many things, which the law of the land permits, which the warrior’s
personal code of honor does not permit.
The discussion about fulfilling your obligation to your neighbor would be a great example
of this statement. The law does not require the warrior to repay his neighbor for lending
him his truck or for helping him work in his garage; it is the warrior’s code of honor that
requires him to repay his debt. When you begin to reflect and meditate on your own code
of honor, you will find that there are many examples which prove this statement to be true.
Ultimately, you determine whether or not you are honorable. Honor is not something
which is set in stone or something which I can lay out for you in black and white terms. I
can give you the cornerstones of honor and the guidance as to what traits makes up honor,
but it is up to you to determine your own personal code of honor. The key is that your code
of honor has to be based on the character traits discussed in this book, a strong sense of
justice and obligation, and you must have the courage to live up to your code of honor once
you have developed it.
Nobody is going to force you to live your life by a code of honor; it is solely up to you. This
is part of your duty as a true warrior. You have to base your actions on a strong sense of
right and wrong. That is what honor is all about. It is not about a list of rules that you
rigidly adhere to no matter what the situation or circumstances may be.
By adhering to a rigid set of rules, you are placing a higher value on those rules than you
are on what is right. This is a warped sense of justice which many times leads to injustice.
As the Roman playwright, Terence, wrote, “The strictest justice is sometimes the greatest
injustice.” This applies to a strict adherence to a specific set of rules, with no room for
flexibility. This is not the way of the warrior.
The way of the warrior is the way of true justice, where what is right is the ultimate law
and trumps the law of the land. There is an inscription in the Catacombs which reads, “The
just man is himself his own law.” The Greek dramatist, Menander, echoed this sentiment
stating, “When you are just you use your character as law.” This is the way of the warrior.
Many people see this as a license to do as they please, but that is a misconception. The key
to those statements is the word just, which means morally correct, valid and reasonable. If
someone is not just then he cannot count on his character or conscience to guide him as to
what is right and what is wrong. Therefore, he cannot be his own guide. In order for the
warrior to use his character or conscience as his guide, he must be dedicated to what is
right, have developed the wisdom to discern right from wrong, and he must be totally
devoted to living a life based on honor.
Robert Wood wrote, “An honorable man esteems his moral health too much to lower
himself willingly by any act that may seem base. He is true to himself and values honor for
its highest meaning…There can be no real success in life unless it is accompanied by this
high sense of honor.” It is this sense of honor which sets the true warrior apart from other
men. This is what makes him a superior man, as Confucius described him.
You have to make your own mind up to live a life of honor. It is this decision which guides
you on the path to warriorship. Samuel Coleridge wrote, “Our own heart, and not other
men’s opinion, form our true honor.” Only you know for sure if your actions are truly
honorable. Of course there are actions which anyone can tell are dishonorable such as
robbing someone in a dark alley. I am not talking about those types of actions. I am
referring to actions which only you know your true intentions.
It is your intentions behind your actions which determine whether or not your actions are
honorable. Sometimes this is not easily ascertained by other people. Francesco Guicciardini
demonstrated this fact very well in the following example from his book Maxims and
Reflections. He wrote, “There is a difference between a brave man and one who faces
danger out of regard for honor. Both recognize danger; but the former believes he can
defend himself against it, and if he did not, he would not face it. The latter may even fear
the danger more than he should, but he stands firm – not because he is unafraid but
because he has decided he would rather suffer harm than shame.”
In this example, an onlooker would not be able to visibly see the difference in the actions of
these two men. It is only the men themselves who would truly know whether or not their
actions were honorable. And it is not just the rare, dangerous conflicts which test your
honor.
How you handle the smaller, more common challenges, also reveals your sense of honor,
maybe even more so than the more dangerous situations. Compromising your honor in the
small, daily conflicts is sometimes more tempting than in the larger, more serious conflicts.
It is during these times, when it is easier to lie or to cower down, that you learn much about
your sense of honor.
These situations require as much resolve and courage as the more serious ones. I’m talking
about times when doing the right thing could cost you money or your job. At these times,
your life may not be on the line, but your honor is nonetheless. Your job, your money, your
car, and your home can all be taken away from you, but whether or not you keep your
honor is completely under your control. It takes a lot of courage to choose your honor over
your financial security. During these times you learn how serious you are about your
honor.
As a true warrior, you not only have obligations to other people, but you also have a duty to
yourself to maintain your honor, even in the face of adversity. This is where the virtue of
courage enters into the equation. You have to have the courage to stand up for what you
know is right. This is part of the warrior’s code of honor. A strong sense of right and wrong
encompasses every part of the warrior’s life. This sense of justice dictates the warrior’s
code of honor.
It is this sense of justice which enables the warrior to make decisions concerning his
obligations and which helps him make the right decisions during questions of honor. As I
said before, honor is not black and white. The warrior does not live by a strict set of rules.
This is not what having an honor code is all about. For example, the warrior’s code of honor
may include being honest, but at the same time, there are times when being completely
honest is not honorable, or the right thing to do.
There are many people who will argue that you should never lie. They will tell you that all
lies are an act of cowardice, but this is simply not true. Obligations of honor are not rigid
rules which the warrior must strictly abide by or else lose his honor. The honorable
warrior will always act according to what is right in the situation he finds himself in –
according to his highest obligation of honor.
Socrates taught that, “The shortest and surest way to live with honor in the world is to be in
reality what we would appear to be; all human virtues increase and strengthen themselves
by the practice and experience of them.” Don’t merely appear to be honorable, but actually
be honorable. Take your code of honor seriously. You will be presented with many
temptations to compromise your honor. Don’t allow emotions such as fear, greed, or anger
to rob you of your honor. Nobody can take your honor from you, but you can lose your
honor by giving in to these various temptations. You have to be completely dedicated to
maintaining your honor or you will find that it has quietly slipped away, without you even
realizing it.
Just remember, as with all of the traits of the warrior lifestyle, you will make mistakes at
times. It does no good to beat yourself up when you fall short. If you find that you have
fallen prey to some temptation and compromised your honor in some way, the best thing
you can do is get right back on track and re-dedicate yourself to living a life of honor. You
are never defeated unless you quit trying.

Meditations on Honor

Our own heart, and not other men’s opinion,


form our true honor.
Samuel Coleridge
The glory of great men must always be measured
against the means they have used to acquire it.
La Rochefoucauld
He who lives without discipline
dies without honor.
Icelandic Proverb
Deal solely with men of honor…they who
do not cherish honor do not cherish virtue,
and honor is the throne of virtue.
Baltasar Gracian
He who wants to sell his honor
will always find a buyer.
Arabian Proverb
Shun any actions that will diminish honor.
Tiruvalluvar
Honor is simply the morality of superior men.
Henry Louis Mencken
He has honor if he holds himself
to an ideal of conduct though it is
inconvenient, unprofitable, or dangerous to do so.
Walter Lippmann
There is a difference between a brave man and one who
faces danger out of regard for honor. Both recognize danger;
but the former believes he can defend himself against it, and
if he did not, he would not face it. The latter may even fear
the danger more than he should, but he stands firm – not
because he is unafraid but because he has decided
he would rather suffer harm than shame.
Francesco Guicciardini
The post of honor is a private station.
Joseph Addison
The greatest way to live with honor in this world
is to be what we pretend to be.
Socrates
Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart.
Seneca
One stumble is enough to deface
the character of an honorable life.
L. Estrange
Honor is a harder master than the law.
Mark Twain
Honor is that which no man can give you and no
man can take away. It’s a gift a man gives to himself.
Rob Roy

Chapter 9
Respect
The Consideration of Thoughtfulness
Respect: Consideration or thoughtfulness; the feeling or admiration and deference towards
somebody or something.
Respect is an important part of martial arts. Stop by any martial arts dojo and you will see
the students bowing, saying ‘yes sir’ and going through various rituals designed to show
respect to the dojo, their instructor, and their art. But what you will also notice, in the vast
majority of these dojos, is students basically performing these motions hurriedly, giving
little thought to why they are bowing or going through these customs. Is this truly a sign of
respect or just jumping through the hoops which they have been taught are part of their
expectations?
If you define respect as consideration or thoughtfulness, then these quick, thoughtless
bows are really not a sign of respect, but rather mere habitual customs. For these students
to actually be showing respect, their minds have to be engaged in thoughtfulness
concerning why they are bowing and why they are addressing their instructor in a
respectful manner, not just going through the motions.
True respect comes from the heart and mind, not from mere outward displays, although if
you truly have respect for something or someone, your respect will manifest itself through
your outward actions as well. Showing real, heartfelt respect for those who deserve your
respect is another sign of a true warrior.
When the true warrior is in the dojo, his bows will be slow and deliberate. You can sense
the respect in his action. It is not some quick, head-bob motion which you see with so many
martial arts students. These mechanical bows look more like someone just smacked the
student in the back of the head instead of a true bow, and these actions contain no real
respect for their instructor, their dojo, or what they are learning. It is obvious when you see
someone who is bowing out of true respect as opposed to these habitual, meaningless
actions.
Respect is one of the areas that the warrior takes more seriously than the ordinary person.
To the warrior, just going through the motions of bowing, without giving his action any
thought, would basically be a sign of disrespect. It would be hypocritical, kind of like saying
something that you truly do not mean.
As I discussed in the previous chapter, the warrior’s actions are based on his code of honor
and what is right. He bows in the dojo to show his true respect because that is what is in his
heart, not out of habit or routine. Showing respect to his teacher and what he is learning is
part of his obligation or duty to his instructor. If for any reason he decides that his
instructor is not worthy of his true respect, he should simply move on and find someone
else to teach him. But while he is learning from his instructor, he should show him true
respect, from the heart.
Emerson stated that, “Men are respectable only as they respect.” This is true. It would be a
disrespectful action for the warrior to not show respect to those who deserve his respect.
Being disrespectful, whether to your martial arts instructor, teacher, or whoever it may be,
without just cause, speaks to your character, not their character. It is your duty to show
respect to those who deserve your respect.
This brings us to the question of who deserves your respect. Obviously, not everyone on
the planet deserves the true respect of the warrior. I personally have no authentic respect
for criminals, thugs, or people of low character. In my opinion, these people do not deserve
my respect. Oh, I may have a healthy respect for what they could do, just as I have a certain
amount of respect for a dangerous animal. But this is not the kind of respect that I am
talking about. The respect that you may have for a dangerous criminal could be defined
more as a healthy fear of what they are capable of doing, not respect in the sense of
admiration.
What I am referring to, for this discussion is respect in the terms of having sincere
admiration for someone who deserves your high regard. Clearly not everyone deserves
your highest admiration. Whether or not someone deserves respect depends on who he is,
his character, and his actions. True respect that comes from the heart and soul of the
warrior, and is not freely given to just anyone and everyone, but only to those who he feels
deserves his respect because of the kind of person they are.
This leads to another question, “If everyone is not deserving of respect, is it hypocritical to
treat everyone with respect?” The answer to this question is absolutely not. It is not being
hypocritical to treat people with respect, even if they do not deserve true respect or
admiration. I know this sounds like a contradiction of what I said earlier, but it’s not. Think
about it. Treating someone with respect is not the same as going through habitual motions
without being thoughtful, and it is not the same as giving someone your true respect. It is
simply treating people in a respectful manner – that’s all.
William Lyon Phelps stated, “This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect for those who
can be of no possible service to him.” He is not talking about having a deep admiration of
people who do not deserve admiration. What he is talking about is how you treat people
who may not be deserving of true respect, people like the wino on the street corner. Most
likely you don’t have a lot of admiration for the wino who is drinking his life away, but that
doesn’t mean that you have to treat him with contempt.
There is a vast difference between treating someone with respect and having true respect
for someone. This is where many people go wrong. When the majority of people do not
respect someone, they treat that person with contempt or outright ignore him altogether.
Since they have no respect for this person, they consider him worthless and not worth their
time. In fact, they take the opposite approach of treating this person in a respectful manner,
and treat him with outright disrespect, as if he is garbage.
This is not the way of the warrior. While there are obviously people who you will not have
any true admiration for, it doesn’t mean that you should outwardly show that fact.
Remember, one of the definitions of respect is thoughtfulness. Respect is not only what you
give to people that you admire, but it is also something that you have to earn by your own
actions. The true warrior will treat everyone in a respectful manner regardless of whether
or not he truly respects them.
How you treat others speaks to your character, not their character. It speaks to the kind of
man that you are and the code that you live by. Being rude and inconsiderate to others,
simply because you do not have true respect for them, is unacceptable. Of course there will
be times when your outward disrespect is called for, but I am talking about generally as
you go through life. Treat everyone in a respectful manner until you have a good reason not
to do so, and that reason will concern personal issues and have specific purposes.
If someone treats you with total disrespect, is rude to you, etc., you have no further
obligation to continue to treat him in a respectful manner. In fact, it is best to just keep your
distance from him, if at all possible. It is not your duty to continue to allow someone to
disrupt your life or rob you of your peace of mind. People who do these things are not
worthy of your true respect or of your respectful treatment. In short, just ignore them as if
they were a ghost, if at all possible.
Those people are the exception to the rule. What I am referring to here, is the people you
encounter in your daily life. You will not have true respect for everyone you come in
contact with in your life, but that doesn’t absolve you from your duty to treat everyone in a
respectful manner. You don’t have to truly respect everyone, but you do owe everyone a
measure of respect, which is simply being thoughtful and kind.
John Gay explained it this way, “We must respect the other fellow’s religion, but only in the
sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children
smart.” This is not true, authentic respect for the other guy, but rather a respect in the
sense that he has the right to his own beliefs and to live his life in his own way, as long as he
is not hurting anyone else. It is not your duty to judge anyone else or their choices, but
rather to treat them in the right way.
You treat people in a respectful way because that is who you are as a warrior. How they
react or behave is their business; how you behave is your business. As Baltasar Gracian
wrote, “The man of principle never forgets what he is, because of what others are.” The
warrior doesn’t lower his standards of behavior because of the way other men act. He
doesn’t act in a disrespectful manner merely because he has had a bad day or is in a bad
mood. He adheres to the standards that he has decided to live by regardless of the actions
of others.
It is not the opinion of the common man that matters, but the opinion of men for whom you
admire and truly respect. These are the men whose respect the warrior seeks. This only
makes sense. Think about it. Do you care what the wino on the street corner thinks about
you or what someone who you have great respect for thinks of you?
Don’t seek to be respected by everyone, rather seek to be worthy of being respected by
everyone. Conduct yourself in a manner that is worthy of respect and don’t worry about
what others think. You determine whether or not you are worthy of true respect. Earn
respect by living by your principles and standards. Don’t lower your standards.

Meditations on Respect

Never take a person’s dignity:


it is worth everything to them, and nothing to you.
Frank Barron
Men are respectable only as they respect.
Emerson
He who wants a rose must respect the thorn.
Persian Proverb
He who does not have the courage to speak up
for his rights cannot earn the respect of others.
Rene G. Torres
Respect is what we owe; love, what we give.
Philip James Bailey
This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect
for those who can be of no possible service to him.
William Lyon Phelps
Seek not the favor of the mulititude;
it is seldom got by honest and lawful means.
But seek the testimony of few;
and number not voices, but weigh them.
Immanuel Kant
Without feelings of respect,
what is there to distinguish men from beast?
Confucius
Respect your efforts, respect yourself.
Self-respect leads to self-discipline.
When you have both firmly under your belt,
that’s real power.
Clint Eastwood
Conduct yourself in a manner that is worthy of
respect and don’t worry about what others think.
Bohdi Sanders
We must respect the other fellow’s religion,
but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect
his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart.
John Gay
Think, feel, and act like a warrior. Set yourself apart
from the rest of society by your personal excellence.
Forrest E. Morgan
The man of principle never forgets what he is,
because of what others are.
Baltasar Gracian
Knowledge will give you power,
but character respect.
Bruce Lee

Chapter 10
Discipline
The Art of Self-Control
Discipline: training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character;
control gained by enforcing obedience or order; orderly or prescribed conduct or pattern of
behavior; self-control.
Discipline is vital to living the warrior lifestyle. None of the other virtues or traits of
warriorhood will ever be developed to their full potential without discipline. It takes
discipline to control your spirit, mind and body and bring them all in line with the
standards by which the warrior has decided to live his life. Without discipline, there can be
no warrior lifestyle. This might seem like an extreme statement, but it is true nonetheless.
So, why is discipline so important to the warrior lifestyle? The answer lies in knowing what
it takes to actually live the warrior lifestyle. The traits of the warrior lifestyle do not
magically appear in your life simply because you think they sound like the way to live. It
takes a lot of time and constant effort to develop these traits, just as it takes a lot of time
and work to develop your martial arts skills to a point where you are proficient with them.
The warrior lifestyle takes work and dedication – it’s not easy.
Without self-discipline, you will barely get out of the starting gate before you find yourself
starting to make excuses for skipping workouts, for not spending time in meditation, or for
not studying to improve yourself. As John Rohn wrote, “We must all suffer one of two
things: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.”
If you really want to live the warrior lifestyle, these are truly your only two choices. You
will take control of your mind and body, and discipline them to meet your goals, or you will
find that somewhere down the line, you will experience the pain of regret and
disappointment for not following through with your goals. It’s that simple.
This is a form of delayed gratification. Either you discipline yourself now for future
rewards, which you will be proud of and which will mold you into the person you want to
be, or you live foolishly, only doing whatever your mind and body dictate to you, and pay in
the future when you find your goals have never come to fruition. It is up to you to decide
what the future holds for you. Will you discipline yourself and live a life of excellence or
will you allow laziness and malaise to rob you of the completion of your objectives?
Discipline is important to virtually every part of the warrior lifestyle. The Dhammapada
states, “Whoever gives oneself to distractions and does not give oneself to meditation,
forgetting true purpose and grasping at pleasure, will eventually envy the one who
practices meditation.” This is true for every undertaking. If you continually put off honing
your skills, you will find that your skills will not develop, and not only will they not develop,
but they will regress.
It doesn’t matter what the skill is that you want to perfect, if you don’t work at it, it will fade
away. This not only goes for meditation, but for everything from your martial arts skills to
golf. Whatever skills you want to perfect in your life, you have to discipline yourself to work
at them, and if you don’t, you will eventually find yourself envious of those who had the
discipline to continue to work and perfect their skills. As William Arthur Ward said, “The
price of excellence is discipline.”
If the price of excellence is discipline, then you must have discipline to live a life of
excellence, and living a life of excellence is what the warrior lifestyle is all about. Therefore,
discipline is vital to living the warrior lifestyle. The famous poet, Percy Bysshe Shelley,
wrote, “What we do upon some great occasion will probably depend on what we already
are; and what we are will be the result of previous years of self-discipline.”
You must discipline yourself to prepare to successfully meet future challenges. If you do not
discipline yourself to practice and perfect your martial arts skills, when you actually need
them to save your life or someone else’s life, they will not be there for you. Don’t think that
you can rest on your laurels and still be prepared to defend yourself when you need to. It
doesn’t work that way. And you sure can’t wait until you find yourself face to face with
some thug, who is determined to rip you to threads, and ask for a couple of minutes to
stretch and loosen up before you engage him. That is ridiculous!
Jim Rohn pointed out, “Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments.” Yet,
so many people let discipline slide and still feel that they are prepared to meet life’s
challenges, that is, until they get to the river and find that the “bridge” that discipline was
supposed to build between their goals and their objectives, never got built because they
neglected to discipline themselves. Then it is too late and all that they have are their
regrets.
You have to train yourself to do what it takes to compose your character, to control your
mind and emotions, and to build your physical skills. It takes dedication and hard work,
and many times your mind and your body will be screaming at you to do something besides
work on your training. You have to have the discipline to overrule your mind, take control,
and follow through to achieve your goals. This is what self-discipline is all about.
Elihu Root put it this way, “The worst, the hardest, the most disagreeable thing that you
may have to do may be the thing that counts most, because it is the hard discipline, and it
alone, that makes possible the highest efficiency.” It does no good to only concentrate on
the training that you enjoy or that you are good at and find easy; you have to work on the
areas that need improvement. You have to push yourself to train and improve your weak
points, even if you find that training disagreeable and unpleasant.
David Campbell wrote, “Discipline is remembering what you want.” Whenever you find
yourself tempted to be a couch potato instead of training, remind yourself what you really
want. What is it that you want to achieve? What kind of person do you really want to be?
Ask yourself these questions, and then ask yourself what you need to do to achieve those
objectives.
You can look at your goals in the warrior lifestyle like a garden. In essence, you are
cultivating all of the qualities that you want in your life by giving them continual attention.
Just like a garden, you have to give your goals daily attention to see them come to fruition.
If you start a garden and don’t continue to tend to it, your goal of a good harvest will not be
fulfilled. You have to discipline yourself to do the garden work, even when you had rather
be doing other things, in order to have a beautiful, striving garden.
The parts of your garden that are growing well and weed free will require less work; the
parts that have weeds growing and are not thriving, will require more of your time. This
same principle can be applied to the development of your character traits and martial arts
skills. You have to maintain the areas that you have developed well, and you have to work
harder on the areas that seem to be problem areas for you.
By now, you should be starting to comprehend that self-discipline begins with your mind.
You have to learn to control your mind in order to train your body to do what is needed to
achieve your goals. If you can’t control your mind, you will find that your self-discipline is
weak. The great self-help author, Napoleon Hill, wrote, “Self-discipline begins with the
mastery of your thoughts. If you don’t control what you think, you can’t control what you
do. Simply, self-discipline enables you to think first and act afterward.” Discipline your
mind, and your body will follow. It is your mind that controls your body.
Abraham J. Heschel wrote, “Self-respect is the fruit of discipline; the sense of dignity grows
with the ability to say no to oneself.” The more you bring your mind under control, and
force both your mind and your body to do what is needed to grow in the warrior lifestyle,
the more confident you will become in your ability to continue to develop self-discipline. It
is like a continuous cycle where the more you discipline yourself, the easier it becomes to
discipline yourself. And, as you continue to take control of your mind, and develop more
self-discipline in your life, the more your self-confidence, self-respect, and self-esteem
grow.
Self-discipline is just like everything else. The more you practice it and the more you work
at it, the easier it becomes, and eventually it becomes almost automatic. This is the point
that you want to get to in your training. Make self-discipline a habit in your life. Do not let
your mind, emotions, or body dictate to you how you will live your life. You decide what
kind of person you want to be, and then you tell your mind and body what they will do and
force them to do what is needed to become the person that you want to become.
It is your dedication to becoming a superior man that will motivate you to develop this kind
of self-discipline. Nobody can do this for you; it is totally in your hands. If you consistently
discipline yourself, you will reap great rewards. I will end this chapter with a quote by
Grenville Kleiser, “By constant self-discipline and self-control you can develop greatness of
character.” Start to cultivate self-discipline in your life today and take control of your
world. The rewards are well worth it!

Meditations on Discipline

What lies in our power to do, it lies in our power not to do.
Aristotle
What we do upon some great occasion will
probably depend on what we already are;
and what we are will be the result of
previous years of self-discipline.
Percy Bysshe Shelley
He who conquers others is strong;
he who conquers himself is mighty.
Lao Tzu
No man is free who is not master of himself.
Epictetus
By constant self-discipline and self-control
you can develop greatness of character.
Grenville Kleiser
Self-respect is the fruit of discipline;
the sense of dignity grows with
the ability to say no to oneself.
Abraham J. Heschel
Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments.
Jim Rohn
A stern discipline pervades all nature,
which is a little cruel that it may be very kind.
Herbert Spencer
The price of excellence is discipline.
William Arthur Ward
The worst, the hardest, the most disagreeable thing
that you may have to do may be the thing that counts most,
because it is the hard discipline, and it alone,
that makes possible the highest efficiency.
Elihu Root
Discipline is remembering what you want.
David Campbell
Self-Discipline is an act of cultivation.
It requires you to connect today’s actions
to tomorrow’s results.
Gary Ryan
We must all suffer one of two things:
the pain of discipline or the pain of regret or disappointment.
Jim Rohn
Self-discipline begins with the mastery of your thoughts.
If you don’t control what you think, you can’t control
what you do. Simply, self-discipline enables you
to think first and act afterward.
Napoleon Hill

Chapter 11
Honesty
The Elusive Facts of Life
Honesty: Moral uprightness; the quality, condition or characteristic of being fair, truthful, and
morally upright; truthfulness or sincerity.
When most people think of the word “honesty” the definition of moral uprightness is not
the first thing that comes to mind. Most people connect honesty with simply being truthful,
but honesty encompasses much more than simply telling the truth, and sometimes moral
uprightness involves being untruthful.
Moral uprightness simply means behaving in a moral or honorable manner, and as you will
see in this chapter, sometimes honor requires a higher duty than your obligation to be
completely honest with someone, as I have already discussed in previous chapters. Yes, I
know, this sounds confusing, especially in a chapter discussing the importance of honesty,
but by the end of this chapter you will see the big picture and will understand what I mean.
So let’s get back to what honesty actually is. If someone says that you are honest, it means
that you are truthful, sincere, and morally upright. To boil it down to the simplest terms,
being honest means that you are truthful – you tell the truth. Inevitably, whenever this
discussion comes up, there are those who love to debate this issue and argue that truth is
relative and that everyone has their own truth. While it may be true that everyone sees the
truth from their own point of view, that is not proof that all truth is relative.
There is a Danish proverb which states, “The sky is not less blue because the blind man
does not see it.” What this proverb means is that the truth doesn’t change simply because
someone sees it a certain way from his or her own point of view. Carl Frederick wrote, “The
truth simply is that’s all. It doesn’t need reasons: it doesn’t have to be right: it’s just the
truth. Period.”
The truth simply is what is. It is reality. Whether anyone chooses to see it, to disagree with
it, to like it, or to dislike it, makes no difference; it remains reality no matter what anyone
thinks or says about it. People can view it in any way they like, but their views of the truth
never have any bearing on the truth itself, only on their own personal perception of reality.
Where people go wrong is when they believe that their personal beliefs concerning what is
the truth, is actually the truth. Their views are nothing more than just that – their views.
As Giordano Bruno stated, “Truth doesn’t change because it is, or is not, believed by a
majority of the people.” Someone may believe that rattlesnake venom is not life-
threatening, but his personal belief on that subject does not change the chemical makeup of
rattlesnake venom or its effects on the human body. His belief is misguided, but as long as
he never comes into contact with a rattlesnake, it will most likely never cause him any
harm and doesn’t really affect anything, other than the possibility of other people thinking
that he is a little off his rocker.
The point that I am trying to make here is that, while it is true that everyone is entitled to
their own personal beliefs, those beliefs never affect reality, only how they choose to view
reality. People choose to believe many things which are not necessarily true. It is for this
reason that Bertrand Russell wrote, “The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no
evidence that it is not utterly absurd; indeed in view of the silliness of the majority of
mankind, a widespread belief is more often likely to be foolish than sensible.”
So, even though people seem to love to argue the point about who really knows what the
“real truth” is, what it all boils down to is that truth is simply reality. Whether or not
anyone can clearly see reality is another discussion, but it has no bearing on the actual
truth. The truth is the truth, period. Problems appear when people try to spin the truth for
their own benefits. This is called being dishonest and is the opposite of honesty, and, in
most cases, is dishonorable.
I have already discussed the fact that the true warrior has certain obligations to his
fellowman. Being honest and truthful to other people is one of those obligations. No one
has any respect for a liar or a conman who continually twists the truth for his own gain. Be
sincere and forthcoming with your fellowman where the truth is concerned. In short, the
true warrior is an honest man.
It is important to note that being honest with your fellowman does not mean that you have
to be completely open and share everything in your life or everything that you think. While
this would definitely be classified as being upfront and honest, it would also be classified as
unwise and foolish. Being honest does not mean that you have an obligation to share your
personal thoughts, feelings, or private information. In fact, you should keep these things to
yourself the vast majority of the time.
There is a big difference between being honest and being foolish. Withholding personal
information, which is nobody else’s business, is not being dishonest at all. Not everything is
meant to be shared, and doing so only sets you up to have your openness used against you.
Be discreet! Don’t share personal information. Don’t feel the need to share your opinions
with everyone. Keep private information private. Francesco Guicciardini wrote, “You have
everything to gain from managing your affairs secretly. And you will gain even more if you
can do it without appearing secretive to your friends.”
While you want to keep your personal information private, you don’t want to make a
spectacle out of doing so. Don’t brag about how you never share this or that, or how you
don’t trust anyone, not even your friends. While this may be true, sharing this information
keeps your friends at arm’s length and can cause hard feelings. Keep private information to
yourself, but do it discreetly. Be honest with everyone, but be smart about it at the same
time. Keeping private thoughts and personal information to yourself is not being dishonest.
It is important for the warrior not to be dishonest with other people because honesty is one
of the character traits which makes him a man of honor. Being honest with others is pretty
much common sense when it comes to living the warrior lifestyle. But honesty involves
more than merely being honest with others, it also involves being honest with yourself.
This is a side of honesty that many people forget about; it is much easier to deceive yourself
than it is to deceive other people.
How does someone deceive himself? The answer lies in what I have already discussed –
seeing things from a personal point of view or as you want them to be, instead of seeing
things as they truly are. Samuel Johnson gives good advice when he stated, “Instead of
thinking how things may be, see them as they are.” People see the truth through their own
perception of it. If they aren’t very careful, their perception will be influenced by a variety
of personal factors including their own personal beliefs, their desires, their emotions, and
their needs.
All of these things can twist the truth, at least in their mind, and they begin to see the truth
through colored glasses. This doesn’t change what is, it only changes how they personally
see reality. Therefore, they aren’t actually seeing things as they are, but as they want them
to be, or as they wish they were. Always strive to see things as they truly are, looking at
what is with an impartial, rational mind, and carefully discerning reality from falsehood. It
is only when you see things as they really are that you can make good choices concerning
how to respond to them.
Bodhidharma stated that, “There is no advantage in deceiving yourself.” This is true.
Although, at the time, there may seem like some advantage for deceiving yourself, in the
long-run there never is. While it is true that putting the truth out of your mind, or putting a
spin on the truth for your own mental or emotional benefit, may have some temporary,
comforting qualities, at some point you will have to come to grips with reality and quit
deceiving yourself. In the end, seeing reality as it truly is, is a must for the warrior.
I am sure that you already know how rare it is to find a truly honest person in our society.
Bending the truth has become fairly acceptable, and it seems that the vast majority of
people have no problem lying when it is convenient for them. This is yet another trait that
sets the true warrior apart from the average person. The warrior strives to be as honest as
possible, even in small, unimportant areas.
For example, most people do not think of exaggerating as being dishonest, but isn’t it? The
Talmud states, “If you add to the truth, you subtract from it.” Exaggerating is being
dishonest, period. If you see someone punch another guy and knock him down, and he gets
up and shakes it off, but when you tell the story, you state that the guy was knocked out
cold – that’s a lie. The world sees it as simply exaggerating, but in reality, it is simply lying.
Don’t exaggerate; tell the truth exactly as it is without adding or subtracting from it.
Anything more or less is being dishonest.
The true warrior should be known for his honesty. His word should be as good as gold. If he
says something happened a certain way, then that should be exactly how it happened. If
you will live your life in this way, people will learn to respect your word, and when you say
something, they will know that it is the truth. This is exactly the kind of reputation that the
true warrior wants to have among his peers. Strive to be a man of your word.
At the same time, consider how to be honest. There are many people who delight in being
brutally honest, which means that they think that as long as they are being honest, that is all
that matters. They don’t concern themselves with other people’s feelings or the
consequences of their words; all that concerns them is that they have been blatantly
honest, and in their mind, that is all that matters.
This is a selfish, inconsiderate attitude to say the least. Many times, these people are using
their honesty for an excuse to disrespect someone else or to covertly hurt someone’s
feelings. The bottom line is this is simply being rude and tactless. Arthur Dobrin stated,
“There is always a way to be honest without being brutal.” Being brutally honest is showing
a lack of tact and a lack of thoughtfulness towards your fellowmen. Be honest, but do so in
the right way. Like Emerson wrote, “There is always a best way of doing everything.”
Another factor to consider on the subject of honesty is that, as I already discussed, honesty
is a rare trait, especially complete honesty. Oh sure, most people are fairly honest about
trivial things, but at the same time, they are not beyond lying when it is to their advantage.
Therefore, the warrior has to become proficient at distinguishing between what is true and
what is falsehood. It doesn’t matter who the source of the statement is, you always have to
question the validity of the statement before you accept it as the truth.
Hans Reichenback drove this point home when he said, “No statement should be believed
because it is made by an authority.” I will take Hans’ point a bit further and state that if a
statement is made by an authority, you had better give it a good examination before you
accept it as truth. Those in authority are notorious when it comes to spinning the truth. It is
their perceived job to control both people and the information which they allow people to
know, not to be completely honest with the population. Keep this in mind.
Politicians and those in authority seem to take to heart what Baltasar Gracian wrote, “The
truth is for the few, the false is for the populace, because popular.” Gracian was not saying
that only a very few people should know the truth, but rather that only a very few people
bother to take the time to discover the truth. Politicians and leaders, on the other hand,
firmly believe that it is only the few who deserve to know the truth or who can handle the
truth. There is a big difference.
Gracian goes on to say, “Look beneath. For ordinary things are far other than they
seem…The false is forever the lead in everything, continually dragging along the fools: the
truth bring up the rear, is late, and limps along in time.” The warrior has to read between
the lines. He has to be intelligent enough to distinguish between the reality of things and
the spin that is fed to people by the media or our leaders.
The last point that I want to make on the subject of honesty, is that, like all of the other
ideals in the warrior’s code of honor, honesty should always be moderated by what is right.
As with all of the warrior’s actions, what is right should dictate his actions, not a rigid set of
rules. This brings me to the question, “Is it always wrong to lie?” Absolutely not!
There are many preachers and legalistic people who will state that it is indeed always
wrong to lie. They will tell you that lying is always an act of cowardice. But they are wrong.
The true warrior lives his life by his code of honor, and like I discussed in the chapter on
honor, honor is based on the warrior’s obligations. It is not based on any black and white,
rigid set of rules, like so many people wrongly assume.
There are times when the warrior has a higher duty than to be honest with someone. For
example, let’s say that you were living in Nazi Germany and that you were valiantly hiding a
young Jewish girl. If a group of Nazi soldiers came to your door and asked you if you were
hiding any Jews, do you think that you would have a higher duty to be honest with the
soldiers or a higher duty to protect the young girl? Would lying to the soldiers mean that
you are being dishonest? Yes, of course you are being dishonest. Would it mean that you
are being dishonorable? No!
I have heard preachers argue this point and say, “Yes, that would be dishonorable because
lying is dishonest and a sin. You should just tell the truth and trust that God will protect the
girl, you and your family.” That argument is ridiculous. Living your life by rigid, inflexible
rules is not a sign of honor; it is a sign of a lack of understanding concerning what honor
truly is.
The intelligent man understands that there will be exceptions to almost everything, based
on what the situation calls for and what is right in each circumstance. He strives to be
honest at all times, but at the same time, he understands that doing what is right and
honorable comes first and foremost in every situation of his life. Use righteousness as your
guide in every decision and you will not go wrong. Righteousness trumps adherence to any
one trait, rule, or law.
Always consider your highest duty and take steps to make sure that duty is fulfilled to the
best of your ability. This is not being dishonest; it is being righteous. I will end this chapter
with a profound thought from the ancient Greek philosopher, Isocrates, “Throughout your
life choose truth and your words will be more believable that other people’s oaths.”

Meditations on Honesty

No statement should be believed


because it is made by an authority.
Hans Reichenbach
The truth simply is that’s all. It doesn’t need reasons:
it doesn’t have to be right: it’s just the truth. Period.
Carl Frederick
Be honest to those who are honest, and be also honest
to those who are not honest. Thus honesty is attained.
Lao Tzu
There is always a way to be honest without being brutal.
Arthur Dobrin
The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence
that it is not utterly absurd; indeed in view of the silliness of
the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more often
likely to be foolish than sensible.
Bertrand Russell
If you add to the truth, you subtract from it.
The Talmud
Instead of thinking how things may be, see them as they are.
Samuel Johnson.
Throughout your life choose truth and your words
will be more believable than other people’s oaths.
Isocrates
The sky is not less blue because
the blind man does not see it.
Danish Proverb
Look beneath.
For ordinary things are far other than they seem...
The false is forever the lead in everything,
continually dragging along the fools:
the truth brings up the rear, is late,
and limps along in time.
Baltasar Gracian
Truth doesn’t change because it is, or is not,
believed by a majority of the people.
Giordano Bruno
I have seldom known anyone who deserted truth in trifles
that could be trusted in matters of importance.
William Paley
Should one say that something does not exist,
merely because we have never seen or heard of it?
Ge Hung
There is no advantage in deceiving yourself.
Bodhidharma

Chapter 12
Courage
The Spirit of Valor
Courage: quality of being brave; the ability to face danger, difficulty, uncertainty, or pain
without being overcome by fear or being deflected from a chosen course of action.
G. K. Chesterton stated that, “Courage is almost a contradiction in terms. It means a strong
desire to live taking the form of readiness to die.” Courage is one of those traits that many
people seem to misunderstand. People also have a hard time distinguishing between
courage and cowardice, the opposite of courage. At first, it sounds ridiculous that anyone
would not be able to tell the difference between courage and cowardice, but you will
understand this statement by the end of this chapter.
To begin with let’s discuss what courage is. Many men have defined courage in different
ways throughout the ages, and we will look at several of those definitions in this chapter.
But first, let’s examine the standard Webster’s definition, courage is the quality of being
brave and having the ability to face danger or difficult situations without being overcome
by fear.
The first part of this definition is pretty straightforward – courage is the quality of being
brave. But, as you will see there is much more to courage than simply being brave. The
majority of people think that being brave means that one doesn’t have any fear. This is not
necessarily so. The man with no fear at all, in any situation, is not necessarily brave, but
rather a bit unbalanced. Fear is a natural emotion, and brave men, as well as everyone else,
feel the emotion of fear.
If you will notice, the definition of courage doesn’t state that courage is being brave without
fear. It states that courage is the quality of being brave without being overcome by fear.
There is a big difference between having no fear and not being overcome by fear. Having no
fear indicates a total absence of the emotion of fear, which is a scary prospect in itself. If
someone has a total absence of fear, his judgment will be faulty in many situations. A total
absence of fear is not a virtue, but rather a mental deficiency. Fear is a necessary emotion,
designed to warn us and protect us. It is only when fear becomes obsessive, and we allow
fear to control us, that fear becomes a problem.
Mark Twain wrote that, “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of
fear.” If a man has absolutely no capability to feel fear, then he really has no capability to be
courageous. Courage is overcoming your fears to do what is right in the face of some
danger, uncertainty, pain, or embarrassment. A man who has no fear or anxiety where
danger, uncertainty, or pain is concerned, has some other mental issues going on which
make him seem brave, when in actuality, what his actions are revealing are simply his
mental deficiencies.
To call a man who is incapable of feeling fear brave could be compared to giving a two year
old boy a hand grenade to play with as a toy. Of course the young boy would have no fear of
the hand grenade because he doesn’t have the intelligence to understand what it is or that
it could hurt him. He doesn’t have the knowledge or wisdom to understand what the
dangers of this “toy” truly are, so he has no fear of it. It would be wrong to classify this boy
as courageous or brave for playing with the hand grenade, when in fact he is not displaying
courage, but merely his ignorance.
The same principle applies to the man who is incapable of feeling fear. If a man does not
have the wisdom to know what should be feared and what shouldn’t be feared, his actions
cannot be classified as courageous. He is not acting out of courage, but out of his ignorance
or lack of understanding. Thucydides, the Greek historian who documented the courageous
story of the Peloponnesian War, wrote, “The bravest are surely those who have the clearest
vision of what is before them, glory and danger alike, and, notwithstanding, go out to face
it.”
If a man does not understand what he is facing, he cannot be brave in that situation, only
ignorant. The difference in a courageous man and a foolhardy man is that the courageous
man understands what he is up against. He understands the possible consequences of
standing up for his principles, or of engaging in some physical battle, but he still acts
according to his principles despite his knowledge that his actions could cost him. The
foolhardy man simply acts. He is rash and compulsive, and either doesn’t take the time to
reflect on what the dangers are, or doesn’t have the intelligence to understand the dangers.
Cervantes wrote that, “The man of true valor lies between the extremes of cowardice and
rashness.” Cowardice and rashness are indeed the two extremes of courage. Cowardice is a
lack of courage. It is allowing fear to overcome you and cause you to falter at the time of
action. Rashness, on the other hand, is being reckless, impulsive, and moving forward
without giving any thought to the situation.
The one thing that both cowardice and rashness have in common is that when someone
acts from either of these extremes, he is letting his emotions control his actions, not
rational thought, and definitely not courage. To be courageous, a man has to be thoughtful.
Francesco Guicciardini wrote, “Only the wise are brave. Others are either temerarious or
foolhardy. Thus, we can say that every brave man is wise, but not that every wise man is
brave.”
From this point of view, we can compare courage to honor in that, it is not that easy for an
outsider to judge whether or not a man is being courageous, just as it is not obvious
whether or not a man is acting out of a sense of honor. If you will recall, some actions may
seem dishonorable from an outside point of view, which, if we were privy to the man’s
thoughts and intentions, would prove to be very honorable. The same principle can apply
to courage.
There are some actions which, when initially seen, may seem like acts of cowardice, but
when examined closer, were truly courageous acts. At the same time, there are some
actions which seem like very courageous acts, but if we were able to see beyond the
obvious, we would understand that the action was not truly an act of courage at all. Let’s
look at a couple of examples.
First, let’s look at the man with his buddies, who are about to enter into some type of
physical encounter, whether it is a brawl or maybe on the battlefield. The fact that this man
follows through and fights alongside his buddies, is not necessarily a sign that he is
courageous. There have been many men who truly wanted to retreat, but didn’t have the
courage to do what their mind was telling them to do. Instead, peer pressure or the fear of
what their friends would think of them, influenced their decision. Thus the decision was
not made from a place of courage, but from a mindset of fear.
On the other hand, let’s say you are watching an altercation at a nightclub. Two men are
having a disagreement. One guy seems pushy and obnoxious, and obviously wants to fight.
The other seems reluctant to fight, no matter how much the other guy pushes him.
Ultimately, the man who is reluctant to fight, turns and walks away, amidst jeers from the
other man and many onlookers.
To those watching this scene, this man may seem like a coward, and indeed he may be, but
the fact that he turned and walked away does not necessarily indicate that this man was a
coward. He may have been a true warrior with the ability to take the other man’s life at
will, but instead chose to end this encounter peacefully instead of hurting the other guy. An
action like that takes a lot of courage and self-confidence. This is a demonstration of self-
control and courage, not of cowardice, but to the untrained eye, it probably would appear
like the man was a coward.
Do you understand the point that I am trying to get across to you? Courage is demonstrated
in many different ways. It is not always expressed by simply rushing in and fighting in
every instance, and many times the man who rushes in and fights is not demonstrating
courage. Walking away, being patient, waiting for the correct time and place, and enacting
self-control are all courageous actions. There is a Philippine proverb which states, “To
evade danger is not cowardice.” John F. Kennedy stated a similar sentiment when he said,
“Compromise does not mean cowardice.”
Aristotle stated that, “The man, then, who faces and who fears the right things and from the
right motive, in the right way and at the right time, and who feels confidence under the
corresponding conditions, is brave.” If we go by Aristotle’s definition of bravery, you will
observe that much of what constitutes courage has to do with what is going on inside of the
man, and you are not privy to these factors. It is the internal struggle that decides whether
or not a man is courageous, not merely his external actions.
You will find such ideas on courage repeated by wise men from throughout the world. E. B.
Benson put it this way, “The essence of courage is not that your heart should not quake, but
that nobody knows that it does.” Herodotus echoed this sentiment stating, “He is the best
man who, when making his plans, fears and reflects on everything that can happen to him,
but in the moment of action is bold.” To be courageous a man has to be thoughtful; he
cannot act on mere emotion or rage. The courageous man has to be in control of himself.
Ohiyesa, when speaking of courage from a Native American point of view, stated, “The
brave man, we contend, yields neither to fear nor anger, desire nor agony. He is at all times
master of himself; his courage rises to the heights of chivalry.” You have to think rationally
and be in control of your mind to be courageous. If you aren’t, your actions, while they may
seem brave and courageous, are actually coming from another place, and many times this
place is fear.
Courage is another of the traits of the true warrior which is intertwined with all the other
virtues and character traits, for without courage a man will falter when the time comes to
stand for his principles. It takes a lot of courage to do what is right when everyone around
you is urging you to do the opposite. Emerson pointed out, “The test of courage comes
when we are in the minority.”
It doesn’t take a lot of backbone to stand for your principles if you have a whole crowd of
people cheering you on and patting you on the back, but it is a different story when those
people are jeering at you and in your face. C. S. Lewis stated that, “Courage is not simply
one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.” The reason for this is
what I just stated, when your back is against the wall, it takes courage to follow through
and live up to your standards.
Confucius didn’t sugar coat it when he taught, “To see what is right and not to do it is
cowardice.” The true warrior knows what is right according to his code of honor that he has
meditated on and decided to make his guide for his life. The test of his dedication comes
when he is confronted with a choice to compromise his standards or to live up to his
standards and deal with whatever consequences that doing the right thing may have on his
life. This is when he has to call on his courage to be strong.
Most martial artists think of courage in terms of physical confrontations. Will he have the
courage to stand up and fight when the time comes and the situation requires this of him?
Will he allow his fear to get the best of him and cause him to back down? These are the
questions that I hear many martial artists discussing, and they are definitely valid
questions. But you should also consider the question of whether or not you are dedicated
enough, to your standards and your code of honor, to stand up for what you believe in
when you are faced with a moral decision.
Robert Louis Stevenson wrote that, “The world has no room for cowards. We must all be
ready somehow to toil, to suffer, to die. And yours is not the less noble because no drum
beats before you when you go out into your daily battlefields, and no crowds shout about
your coming when you return from your daily victory or defeat.” Courage is not just about
being brave in battle or physical confrontations. In fact, you will find many more chances to
prove your courage in daily life than in the rare physical confrontation, unless you work in
a warrior profession.
There is a famous quote by Shakespeare which we hear quoted very often, “Cowards die
many times before their deaths, the valiant never taste of death but once.” When you allow
fear to overcome you, whether it is fear of pain or fear of some other consequence of
standing up for what is right, you have to live with the pain of your decision for months,
years, or maybe even the rest of your life. You will replay your decision over and over again
in your mind, and each time you will find that the regret that you feel is a very painful
experience. This is the death that Shakespeare was referring to in his famous quote.
Saint Theresa once said, “Whenever conscience commands anything, there is only one thing
to fear, and that is fear.” If you allow fear to control your life or your decisions, you will end
up with a life full of regret. You must learn to master your fear and take control of your
mind. You cultivate courage in your life just like you cultivate any of the other virtues – by
working at it.
The way that you learn to conquer your fears is by confronting them. This goes back to
what I discussed in the chapter on controlling your thoughts and your mind. Fear is an
emotion and originates in your mind. The mind is where you must battle and conquer your
fears. Each time you notice fear starting to dominate your thoughts, you have to stop and
address it; if you fail to do this, your fear will gain momentum and will expand.
Face your fears and you will be able to conquer them. If you evaluate your fearful thoughts,
you will notice that they all have to do with something in the future, not the immediate
present. Let’s go back to the example of the man walking away from a fight. The thoughts of
fear that this man, if he is a confident man with the ability to end the fight at will, will have
center on the questions, “What will everyone think of me if I walk away?” “Will they think I
am a coward?” “Will I look weak? “Will I ever be able to hold my head up in this bar again?”
Notice that all of these questions have one thing in common – they center around what
might happen in the future, not on what is happening at the present moment. Focus on
what is right in the present moment, not on what may happen down the line. Of course you
should consider all possible consequences and alternatives when making important
decisions, but do not let fear be your deciding factor. Think rationally and always let what
is right be the ultimate decision maker in your life. I will end this chapter with a thought
from The Havamal, “The brave and generous have the best lives. They’re seldom sorry.”
Live your life with courage and you will have few regrets.

Meditations on Courage

Be brave and courageous, for adversity


is the proving ground of virtue.
Battista Alberti
Courage is the most important of all virtues,
because without it we can’t practice any
other virtue with consistency.
Maya Angelou
The world has no room for cowards.
We must all be ready somehow to toil, to suffer, to die.
And yours is not the less noble because no drum beats
before you when you go out into your daily battlefields,
and no crowds shout about your coming when you
return from your daily victory or defeat.
Robert Louis Stevenson
Cowards die many times before their deaths,
the valiant never taste of death but once.
Shakespeare
To evade danger is not cowardice.
Philippine Proverb
To see what is right and not to do it is cowardice.
Confucius
The test of courage comes when we are in the minority.
Emerson
Courage is grace under pressure.
Ernest Hemingway
The man of true valor lies between the extremes
of cowardice and rashness.
Cervantes
He is the best man who, when making his plans,
fears and reflects on everything that can happen to him,
but in the moment of action is bold.
Herodotus
Only the wise are brave.
Others are either temerarious or foolhardy.
Thus, we can say that every brave man is wise
but not that every wise man is brave.
Francesco Guicciardini
Courage is a special kind of knowledge:
the knowledge of how to fear what ought to be feared
and how not to fear what ought not to be feared.
David Ben-Gurion
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear –
not absence of fear.
Mark Twain

Chapter 13
Endurance
The Warrior’s Fortitude
Endurance: The ability to bear prolonged hardship, exertion, or pain; the survival or
persistence of something over time.
As you can see from the definition above, there are basically two different definitions for
endurance, and both are important for the warrior. The warrior must be able to withstand
prolonged hardship and pain, just as everyone must at one time or another in life. In
addition, it should go without saying, that the warrior must be persistent in his quest for
the warrior lifestyle in order to be successful. Without a doubt, the ability to bear
prolonged exertion is part of the warrior’s physical training. Together these traits form the
warrior’s fortitude.
Henry Tuckerman stated that, “There is a strength of a quiet endurance as significant of
courage as the most daring feats of prowess.” Endurance does take courage. It is extremely
tempting to just give up and throw in the towel when hardship and pain becomes almost
overwhelming, but it is precisely at that time that the warrior’s endurance is most needed.
During times of persistent hardship is when the warrior learns the most about his
fortitude.
You have to train yourself to endure the tough times in order to be successful, no matter
what your goal may be. If you give up when the going gets tough, you will never accomplish
much in life. Everyone has tough times. Everyone has periods where everything seems to
go wrong and where they hear the very tempting voice of defeat whispering, “It is not
worth it – just throw in the towel and walk away.” The temptation to give in to defeat is felt
by everybody at one time or another, but a determined fortitude and a never-say-die
attitude are distinctive characteristics of the warrior. It is a vital part of the warrior
lifestyle.
To put fortitude in layman’s terms, it literally means, “guts, grit, determination, resilience,
and staying power.” Obviously, these are traits that the warrior must have, not only to be
successful in the warrior lifestyle, but to successfully perfect any one of the single traits of
Modern Bushido. Ralph Bunche stated, “To make our way, we must have firm resolve,
persistence, and tenacity. We gear ourselves to work hard all the way. We can never let up.”
That is a perfect picture of what it takes to live the warrior lifestyle.
One of the most famous self-help authors of our times, Napoleon Hill, wrote, “The majority
of men meet with failure because of their lack of persistence in creating new plans to take
the place of those which fail.” A vital part of the warrior’s fortitude is the tenacity to not
give up when he fails in one endeavor or another. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone falls
short at one time or another. The warrior lifestyle is a never-ending, ongoing process, not a
goal that you achieve and then check off of your completion list.
You will fall short in one area or another as you work to perfect your character, your
mental processes, and your physical skills. You will encounter sore muscles, injuries, and
setbacks as you go through the process of training. The trick is to not give up. This is what it
means to endure, to follow through with determination, to endure exertion and pain. If you
find that your plan to achieve your objectives is not working, don’t give up, simply create a
new plan. To quote Napoleon Hill again, “Patience, persistence and perspiration make an
unbeatable combination for success.” You will find that many times a little more
persistence will turn a seemingly hopeless situation into a success.
The second definition of endurance is the survival or persistence of something over time.
Napoleon Hill stated that, “Persistence is to the character of man as carbon is to steel.”
When you add carbon to steel, you make the steel harder and stronger. Carbon makes it
better. This is what persistence does with your character. Giving up weakens your
character, whereas persistently enduring life’s hardships builds your character.
William Barclay wrote, “Endurance is not just the ability to bear a hard thing, but to turn it
into glory.” For the warrior, endurance means more than simply putting up with a bad
situation; it means conquering that situation and turning it into a victory. It is one thing to
simply survive a prolonged hardship, but it is another thing entirely to take that hardship
and turn it into something positive. That is the warrior’s objective. Survival is the
foundation of endurance; complete triumph is the endgame.
When speaking of survival, there are two schools of thought which go to opposite extremes.
The first school of thought is when it comes to survival, anything goes. Imelda Marcos
stated, “Doesn’t the fight for survival also justify swindle and theft? In self-defense,
anything goes.” Imelda Marcos was a crook. Her statement was basically meant to justify
her unethical actions. While it is true that in a real life-or-death, physical encounter,
anything goes, this philosophy should not apply to enduring life’s hardships. This is
especially true for the warrior.
The warrior has to learn to endure life’s hardships and pain, but having to endure
hardships is not an excuse to lower your standards or to lose your honor. There is a right
way and a wrong way to do everything. Turning to dishonest acts and justifying them by
blaming them on your circumstances is merely a cop out. This is not the way of the warrior,
but rather the mindset of the criminal.
On the other extreme, you have the ultra passive school of thought which basically states
that it is better to die than to ever harm another person, no matter what the circumstances.
Khalil Gibran stated, “If my survival caused another to perish, then death would be sweeter
and more beloved.” Again, this is not the way of the warrior. There are times when your
survival may require that you do harm to another person. While the true warrior never
wants to hurt or injure anyone else, he is certainly willing to do so if his hand is forced.
If his survival depends on his using martial arts skills to defend himself, then he is certainly
justified. The philosophy that there is never any reason to harm or kill another human
being is for monks or priests – not for warriors. Someone has to be willing to stand against
evil in a proactive way, and that someone is the warrior.
The warrior lives somewhere in between these two extreme philosophies. His philosophy,
concerning enduring hardships and surviving what life throws at him, has to be balanced
with the code by which he lives. Surviving life’s hardships does not mean lowering your
standards or temporarily shelving your principles. It means using your principles to
overcome the hardships you are facing and turning those hardships into a victory in the
end.
Hunker down when you need to. The middle of a blizzard is not the time to take action and
shovel your driveway; it is the time to patiently wait in the safety of your warm house.
After the storm clears is the time to pull out the snow shovels and persistently work to
clear the snow and declare victory over the storm. Going out and working to remove the
snow in the middle of the blizzard is only an exercise in futility; this is not smart. Endure
the storm’s fury, and then take action to achieve victory and overcome what the storm has
thrown at you.
Timing is important. There is a time and a place for everything. There is a time to sit
patiently and a time to take action. Both of these are important aspects of endurance.
Waiting patiently is not the same thing as doing nothing. Many times, patiently waiting for
the right time to take action is the hardest part of enduring life’s hardships. A good example
of this has to do with your physical training.
Suppose that during your training, you pull a muscle in your leg while sparring. Of course
you aren’t going to just give up and decide to throw in the towel on your martial arts
training. Persistence is a vital part of perfecting your martial arts skills, so you have to
endure this painful injury and continue to train, but you have to be disciplined in doing so.
You have to be patient and wait for your injury to heal before you continue your training.
This is an important part of the process of endurance and persistence.
If you were to skip this phase and just continue to train, thinking that you are showing your
fortitude by enduring the pain and working through it no matter what, you would simply
be making things worse. Don’t confuse endurance and perseverance with foolishness. Like I
said before, there is a time and a place for everything, including waiting patiently for the
right time to act.
Being persistent doesn’t mean that you work nonstop and try to force things to happen; it
means not quitting, not giving up. Neither does being persistent mean that you continue to
pound away at your challenge using the exact same means. You may have to change your
plans and your approach to the problem in order to ultimately be successful. Remember
that often repeated definition of insanity – doing the same thing and expecting different
results.
Be persistent in continuing to endure and to work at achieving your objective, not at doing
the same exact thing. There is a big difference in the two. W. Edwards Deming stated that,
“It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory.” Everything changes. Nothing
remains the same for very long. You have to be willing to change in order to survive. While
your core principles should not change, your actions must be flexible. You must adapt your
actions to the circumstances in order to survive, and you must do so without compromising
your principles. Endure the storms of life and rise above them in order to reach your
ultimate goal.

Meditations on Endurance

Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines,


but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes.
Buddha
Endurance is nobler than strength.
John Ruskin
Sorrow and silence are strong,
and patient endurance is godlike.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
We too must endure and persevere in the inquiry, and then
courage will not laugh at our faintheartedness in searching
for courage; which after all may, very likely, be endurance.
Socrates
Endurance is patience concentrated.
Thomas Carlyle
There is a strength of a quiet endurance as significant
of courage as the most daring feats of prowess.
Henry Tuckerman
Heroism is endurance for one moment more.
George F. Kennan
Endurance is not just the ability to bear a hard thing,
but to turn it into glory.
William Barclay
Prolonged endurance tames the bold.
Lord Byron
The men who learn endurance,
are they who call the whole world, brother.
Charles Dickens
Come what may, all bad fortune
is to be conquered by endurance.
Virgil
Endurance and to be able to endure is the
first lesson a child should learn because
it’s the one they will most need to know.
Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Endurance is the crowning quality.
James Russell Lowell
The majority of men meet with failure because of
their lack of persistence in creating new plans
to take the place of those which fail.
Napoleon Hill
Continuous, unflagging effort,
persistence and determination will win.
James Whitcomb Riley

Chapter 14
Justice
The Warrior’s Conviction
Justice: the quality of being righteous; rectitude; impartiality; fairness; the quality of being
right or correct; sound reason; rightfulness; validity.
Justice is the quality of being righteous, or in more straightforward terms, the quality of
being right or correct. This isn’t referring to being right as far as trivial knowledge, but
rather being right where your actions are concerned. As I have already discussed, the true
warrior does his best to ensure that his actions are right and that all of his decisions are
based on what is right according to his own standards, not necessarily the legal standards
of the day. This is the warrior’s conviction and his dedication to integrating justice into his
every action.
It is your commitment to justice that makes your actions righteous, not the outcome of your
actions. You do not have complete control over the end results of your actions, and
consequently, it is not the outcome which should ultimately concern you – it is doing what
is right that is your main responsibility as a warrior. Of course you want to try your best to
achieve a satisfactory outcome, but you aren’t God, and you can’t control everything. Your
job is to be committed to justice in your actions. Make sure that your actions are right and
just, and then let the chips fall where they may.
Socrates was so committed to being just that he carried out a death sentence on his own life
for trumped up charges. Even when he had the opportunity to escape, he refused because
he considered breaking the law of the day unjust. This is total dedication to justice,
although in my opinion, a misguided view of justice. Simply because a group of men decide
to declare something a “law” doesn’t automatically make their declaration just. In fact,
given the character of the majority of our lawmakers, just laws are becoming a rarity.
It is for this reason that the warrior should meditate on what is truly right and wrong, and
develop his own code of honor with justice as his guide. Of course that doesn’t exempt him
from being held accountable to the laws of the country in which he lives, but it does assure
him that his actions will be just instead of simply lawful. Lao Tzu taught, “Highly evolved
people have their own conscience as pure law.” This train of thought is also found in the
Catacombs where it is inscribed, “The just man is himself his own law.”
This doesn’t mean that the highly evolved, just man doesn’t have to obey the laws of the
land, but rather that the law of the land is not his ultimate guide or final word as far as what
is just and what is unjust. The final determination comes from the warrior’s internal sense
of right and wrong, thus his conscience is his ultimate law. The catch here is that the
warrior’s conscience has to be pure, sincere, and as Lao Tzu stated, highly evolved.
Many people are not highly evolved and have very low morals. For them to depend on their
conscience to guide them would be ludicrous. It is for this reason that we have to have laws
at all. If everyone was highly evolved and dedicated to justice and always doing the right
thing, laws would be unnecessary. But, as I am sure you are aware, this is not the case, so
we elect politicians, many with no clue what true justice is, to make laws to control those
who do not have the character to control themselves.
This is yet another trait which sets the true warrior apart from the average person. The
general population falsely believes that justice simply means following the letter of the law.
Even the wise Socrates believed this, but this is not true justice. As I stated above, the letter
of the law is manmade, it is not sacred. The vast majority of our laws are enacted, not
because they are dedicated to justice, but rather out of hidden agendas and backroom
deals. They have little to do with justice.
Adhering strictly to some of these laws is actually injustice run amuck. It has always been
this way. Aristotle taught, “The virtue of justice consists in moderation, as regulated by
wisdom.” Notice Aristotle said, “regulated by wisdom” not regulated by the letter of the
law. The ancient Roman playwright, Terence, stated, “Extreme law is often injustice.”
Antoine the Healer commented, “Often man is preoccupied with human rules and forgets
the inner law.”
It is this inner law that the true warrior has to listen to in order to discern what is just and
what is unjust, not rules signed into law by crooked, dishonest politicians. The warrior
knows that true justice goes much deeper than these official laws. Simply because
something is voted on and passed into law doesn’t make it just. As Friedrich von Schiller
said, “The voice of the majority is no proof of justice.”
Again, I want to emphasize that I am not saying that you should not obey the law, merely
that the law is not the ultimate authority concerning right and wrong to the enlightened
warrior. Deliberately ignoring the law can cause you many headaches and major problems.
Doing so would simply be foolish, unless you are required to disregard the law for reasons
of higher justice or honor.
Baltasar Gracian wrote, “A just man. He stands on the side of the right with such conviction,
that neither the passion of a mob, nor the violence of a despot can make him overstep the
bounds of reason.” This is the commitment that the warrior should have to justice, and it is
also where Socrates was wrong in his decision to take his own life at the command of the
Greek politicians. He overstepped the bounds of reason.
There is a big difference between being lawful and being just. Although the two can
overlap, this is not always the case. Socrates was following the letter of the law, not
necessarily being just. If justice was actually done in that case, Socrates would have never
been sentenced to death in the first place. This is a great example of the law and true justice
being at odds with each other. If you try, I am sure that you can come up with many other
clear cut, modern day examples as well.
It is important for the warrior to keep this distinction in mind when considering his
actions. It is also important that he keep in mind the consequences of his actions.
Sometimes being just can put you at odds with the law, and that most likely will have less
than desirable consequences. Although it may seem to be easy and straightforward at first
glance, living the warrior lifestyle is not easy or uncomplicated. Sometimes being just
requires you to make some hard decisions, but the truly just man will put what is right
before what is easy.
Socrates, although I believe he made the wrong decision in the end, was an extremely wise
teacher and had much to say about justice. He taught, “You are mistaken my friend, if you
think that a man who is worth anything ought to spend his time weighing up the prospects
of life and death. He has only one thing to consider in performing any action, that is,
whether he is acting justly or unjustly, like a good man or a bad man.”
Although I personally would not have made the decision to drink poison instead of
escaping from prison, there can be no doubt that Socrates made his final decision based on
what he thought was right. That is the best that any man can do. Others can second guess
his decisions, debate his decisions, etc., but in the end, what truly matters is that the
warrior bases his decisions on what is right according to his own principles. If he does this,
he has done the best that he can do and should be honored for having the integrity to do
what he thought was right.
Being just is not a matter for debate. Every decision has to be either right or wrong, just or
unjust. Zeno the Stoic stated, “Just as a stick must be either straight or crooked, so a man
must be either just or unjust. Nor again are there degrees between just and unjust.” A door
is either open or shut; it has to be one or the other. It can be almost shut, but almost shut is
still open. The same principle applies to your actions. They are either just or unjust. If a
certain action is close to being just, but not quite there, it is still unjust.
There are many reasons that people choose not to do what is right, which in effect is
choosing to be unjust. For most people, acting unjustly is merely a matter of selfishness;
they are purely concerned with what is best for them personally, not in being just. This
shouldn’t be the case for the warrior. The warrior has to hold himself to a higher standard.
His every decision is based on his perception of right and wrong. This is part of living the
warrior lifestyle.
Living the warrior lifestyle requires much more than living like the average citizen. The
warrior is focused on justice in all his actions, as well as his inaction. Yes, you can be unjust
by doing nothing. Marcus Aurelius pointed this out clearly, stating, “You can also commit
injustice by doing nothing.” Gichin Funakoshi echoed this thought when he said that, “To
avoid action when justice is at stake demonstrates a lack of courage.”
The true warrior is accountable for both his actions and his inactions. Acting according to
what is just, also includes doing nothing. “Doing nothing” is actually an action, and can be as
unjust as doing something that is blatantly wrong. Pontius Pilate actually did nothing
during the trial of Jesus, but his actions of “washing his hands of the whole matter” was
unjust act.
Justice is basically doing what is right without allowing your personal biases or personal
desires to cause you to veer off course. This takes discipline and practice, and many times it
can be a hard thing to master, but the true warrior will make it one of his priorities. As with
all of the traits of the warrior lifestyle, it is important to truly make dedication to justice an
integral part of your life. As Aeschylus said, “Don’t appear just; be just.”

Meditations on Justice

You are mistaken my friend, if you think that a man


who is worth anything ought to spend his time
weighing up the prospects of life and death.
He has only one thing to consider in performing any action,
that is, whether he is acting justly or unjustly,
like a good man or a bad man.
Socrates
The voice of the majority is no proof of justice.
Friedrich von Schiller
There is a point at which even justice does injury.
Sophocles
A just man. He stands on the side of the right
with such conviction, that neither the passion
of a mob, nor the violence of a despot can
make him overstep the bounds of reason.
Baltasar Gracian
He that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.
The Gospel of Luke
To avoid action when justice is at stake
demonstrates a lack of courage.
Gichin Funakoshi
Often man is preoccupied with human rules
and forgets the inner law.
Antoine the Healer
Just as a stick must be either straight or crooked,
so a man must be either just or unjust.
Nor again are there degrees between just and unjust.
Zeno the Stoic
You can also commit injustice by doing nothing.
Marcus Aurelius
The just man is himself his own law.
Catacombs Inscription
The superior man enacts equity;
justice is the foundation of his deeds.
Confucius
Don’t appear just; be just.
Aeschylus
Extreme law is often injustice.
Terence
The just man is not one who does hurt to none,
but one who having the power to hurt represses the will.
Pythagoras

Chapter 15
Sincerity
The Genuine Article
Sincerity: the quality or state of being sincere, honesty of mind; freedom from hypocrisy.
I have said many times that you should be a man of honor, not merely appear to be a man of
honor. This means you must be sincere. You must be free from hypocrisy and develop
honesty of mind, which means that you have to monitor your thoughts as I discussed
earlier. No one respects a hypocrite. A hypocrite is someone who pretends to have
admirable principles or beliefs, but doesn’t back them up with his actions. He is a fraud.
This is not the way of the warrior, but rather the way of the charlatan.
The Chinese book, The Doctrine of the Mean, states that, “Sincerity is the Way of
Heaven…He who is sincere is one who hits upon what is right without effort…He is
naturally and easily in harmony with the Way. Such a man is a sage. He who tries to be
sincere is one who chooses the good and holds fast to it.” Sincerity is a very important part
of the warrior lifestyle and it is vital when it comes to being comfortable in your own skin.
Be who you are. This doesn’t mean that you don’t take pains to improve yourself and make
yourself a better person, rather it means that you should be relaxed and comfortable letting
people know who you truly are and what you stand for – be sincerely you. Don’t worry
what everyone thinks about you or if they approve or disapprove of who you are; just be
yourself, and be a man of honor. Let them see what a true man of honor is like.
The key here is being a true man of honor, not simply appearing to be a man of honor. Be
honorable to your very core. When you truly are the person you want to be, you do not
have to be shy about being yourself. It is only when you are pretending to be someone
other than who you really are, that you become unsure about allowing others to find out
who you truly are.
For many people, depending on your personality, this can be a difficult thing to do. Most
people desire the approval of their friends and family, and they can worry that if they allow
others to see who they truly are, that they will not approve of what they see. This is one of
the main reasons that people hide who they are and more or less play the part of an actor
in public or around their friends and family. This usually boils down to one of two things.
First, either the person is lacking in overall self-confidence concerning who he is or how he
lives his life, and fears that his peers, friends, and family will not be accepting of who he
truly is or how he lives. The second factor is that he wants so much to be liked or admired,
that he is hesitant to take the risk that showing his real face will cost him the respect and
admiration of his friends and family.
Both of these come down to a lack of self-confidence in who he truly is as a person. While
he may feel, deep down in his spirit, that he is living as he should, he has a deep-seated fear
that others will not understand or approve of who he is or how he lives his life. It takes
courage to live life your way, without worrying about what other people think of your
choices. It also takes sincerity and making up your mind that, in the end, you are going to
live your life in your own way, no matter what anyone else may think about your choices.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh points out, “The most exhausting thing in life, I have discovered, is
being insincere.” It is exhausting to put on an act, always being someone else when you are
around other people, like an actor on a stage. It is draining because you are trying to be
someone you are not. On the other hand, being sincere and being yourself means being in a
relaxed confident state of mind. Thus it does not drain your energy and you feel more
comfortable.
The bottom line, where this is concerned, is that your life is your life. It really is nobody
else’s business how you choose to live your life, as long as you are not harming anyone else.
If you are doing your best to live a life of honor and integrity, you have nothing to be
ashamed of. Even though most people may not understand the way of the warrior, it
doesn’t mean you have to keep your beliefs and principles hidden or be shy about sharing
your philosophy.
Living the warrior lifestyle is not something that everyone will understand, but it is also
nothing to be ashamed of or to keep hidden, unless of course, you are merely pretending to
live the way of the warrior and don’t want anyone to know that you are a pretender. If this
is the case, you have bigger issues than what others think of you, and you need to address
those underlying issues and quit being a hypocrite. Be sincere in your quest to perfect your
character. As Tzu-ssu taught, “Just act sincerely, in accordance with your true nature.”
It is also important to note that, while it is important to allow others, especially those close
to you, to know who you truly are as a person, this doesn’t mean that you have to share
everything about yourself. Being sincere doesn’t mean you have to be completely open and
share every piece of private information about your life. You can be sincere without being
an open book. Use discretion about how much of your life you share with other people.
It takes strength and courage to be yourself. La Rochefoucauld stated that, “The weak
cannot be sincere,” and this is true. Weak people have a very hard time being sincere
because they doubt themselves; and it is not only the weak that have a hard time being
sincere with others. In fact, the vast majority of people are insincere to a point.
La Rochefoucauld went on to teach that, “Sincerity is an openness of heart that is found in
very few people. What we usually see is only an artful disguise people put on to win the
confidence of others.” People have agendas, and to achieve those agendas, they play the
parts that they believe will make them successful, instead of sincerely being themselves. It
is for this reason that you have to be very careful and try to look behind the veil to find out
who the real person truly is.
The warrior, on the other hand, acts with sincerity. This doesn’t mean that he always lets
everyone know exactly who he is or what he is thinking – he doesn’t. That would be unwise.
Sincerity simply means acting from a place of truth concerning who you really are. You
must be sincere with yourself as well as with other people. James Russell Lowell stated
that, “No man can produce great things who is not thoroughly sincere in dealing with
himself.” You have to be sincere and honest with yourself first, before you can be sincere
with other people.
Lowell goes on to say, “Sincerity is impossible, unless it pervades the whole being, and the
pretence of it saps the very foundation of character.” This is an interesting thought. Since
the main goal of the warrior lifestyle is to perfect your character, if you are doing
something that is undermining the very foundation of your character, you are going to have
a hard time being successful. George Henry Lewes echoes this point stating, “Insincerity is
always weakness; sincerity even in error is strength.” Are you starting to see the
importance of sincerity for the true warrior?
Unless you are sincere about living the warrior lifestyle, you are only playing around, and
this will not lead to permanent changes in your life. You have to be sincerely devoted to
your beliefs and the principles in your life. If you are merely pretending, sooner or later
that will come to light. As Aesop taught in his famous fables, “Those who pretend to be
what they are not, sooner or later, find themselves in deep water.”
Being sincere means having confidence in your decisions and who you are, or who you are
becoming. You develop this confidence by meditating on who and what you want to be,
then sincerely working to become that person. At this point, I need to make a distinction
between pretending to live the warrior lifestyle and pretending to be who you want to be.
These two actions may sound the same, but they are miles apart.
Pretending to live a life of honor and integrity, while at the same time really being the
opposite, is merely being a hypocrite. Pretending to be who you want to be, as you work to
develop the qualities that you sincerely desire to develop, is part of the process of
becoming the person you want to become. If you want to be a man of honor, act like a man
of honor until you sincerely have become that person. This is not being a hypocrite, but
rather one of the techniques that one uses to change his character. Do you see the
difference in the two?
Furthermore, being sincere means that you aren’t competing with others. You are merely
doing the best that you can do to improve your own life. It doesn’t matter where anyone
else is in the process of becoming who he wants to be; it only matters where you are and
what you are doing to improve your own life. It is okay to use others as examples or as role
models, but not as someone that you have to compete with in order to achieve your
objectives.
Lao Tzu taught, “When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or
compete, everybody will respect you.” Well, maybe saying that everybody will respect you
is going a bit too far, but you will definitely gain much more respect by being yourself, and
being sincere, than you will by putting on an act that sooner or later most people will be
able to see through. There is an old Shinto teaching that sums this thought up, it says, “With
sincerity, there is virtue.”
While it is important to be sincere with other people, it is even more important to be
sincere with yourself. You have to be honest with yourself about what you want and who
you want to be. Then you have to sincerely follow your roadmap to become the person that
you want to be – a man of character, honor, and integrity.
Meditations on Sincerity

Just act sincerely, in accordance with your true nature.


Tzu-ssu
The most exhausting thing in life,
I have discovered, is being insincere.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Sincerity is an openness of heart that is found
in very few people. What we usually see is only an
artful disguise people put on to win the confidence of others.
La Rochefoucauld
With sincerity, there is virtue.
Shinto teaching
Everything is based on mind, is led by mind,
is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act
with a polluted mind, suffering will follow you,
as the wheels of the oxcart follow the footsteps of the ox.
Everything is based on mind, is led by mind,
is fashioned by mind. If you speak and act
with a pure mind, happiness will follow you,
as a shadow clings to a form.
Buddha
When you are content to be simply yourself
and don’t compare or compete, everybody will respect you.
Lao Tzu
The mature person values sincerity above all things.
Tzu-ssu
Insincerity is always weakness;
sincerity even in error is strength.
George Henry Lewes
Sincerity is impossible, unless it pervades the whole being,
and the pretence of it saps the very foundation of character.
James Russell Lowell
The weak cannot be sincere.
La Rochefoucauld
Those who pretend to be what they are not,
sooner or later, find themselves in deep water.
Aesop
Sincerity is the single virtue that binds
the divine and man in one.
Shinto teaching
Sincerity is moral truth.
George Henry Lewes
No man can produce great things who is not
thoroughly sincere in dealing with himself.
James Russell Lowell

Chapter 16
Self-Knowledge
The Warrior’s Introspection
Self-Knowledge: knowledge or understanding of one’s own capabilities, character, feelings, or
motivations.
Self-knowledge is very important. Without the knowledge of your own capabilities, you will
not be able to understand what your strengths and weaknesses are, thus you will not know
what you need to focus on in your training, or what you can and cannot do. This same
principle applies to understanding your character. You have to know what areas need
improving in your quest to perfect your character. If you don’t understand your feelings or
motivations, you will have problems controlling your emotions and making sure that your
actions are just. So, as you can clearly see, the warrior’s introspection is vitally important.
Baltasar Gracian stated, “No man can be master of himself, who does not first understand
himself.” The true warrior must spend time alone, searching his soul, in order to know
exactly who and what he is. Examine every area of your life. It is the warrior’s ultimate
objective to live a life of excellence – in every way. For the warrior to be able to complete
this goal, he has to have an intimate knowledge of himself. While this may seem obvious, it
is not as common or as easy as you may think.
Most people assume that they know themselves. After all, who knows you better than you,
right? Well, this is not necessarily true. Let me put this in the form of an analogy of a
football game where the coaches sit high above, in the press box, in order to observe the
players. Those coaches can see more about what the players are doing than the players
themselves, thus they tend to know the players’ weaknesses better than the players do.
Other people can often see things that you can’t see in yourself; so a true friend can be a
valuable resource in the process of obtaining self-knowledge.
Nelson Boswell stated, “We must find out what we really are and what we really want.”
Both of these are part of the process of self-discovery. Achieving real self-knowledge
involves knowing who and what you are, and what you truly want in life. Without this
knowledge, you are like a boat drifting on the waves, being carried wherever the winds of
life blow you. Self-knowledge is the beginning of self-improvement and vital to the
development of your principles. Gracian wrote, “It is a first principle that in order to
improve yourself, you must first know yourself.”
This is an important principle since self-improvement is what the warrior lifestyle is all
about. You can’t improve anything if you don’t first know what needs to be improved. Once
you know what needs to be improved or fixed, you can then begin the process of finding out
how to make the needed improvements. Making improvements in your life is like a
mechanic working on a car. He first has to figure out what is wrong with your car before he
can work on it and make it run better.
No mechanic would simply start replacing parts, rewiring the electrical system, etc. without
first doing some investigating and finding out what is working and what is not working.
The same principle goes for you in your quest to live the warrior lifestyle. You have to find
out what strengths you already have and what areas need some work. Then you can work
to make your strengths even stronger, and to turn your weaknesses into strengths.
It takes quite a bit of introspection to really understand yourself and know what you
believe in and what you truly stand for – to understand your principles and to develop your
own code of life. Carl Jung taught that, “We should know what our convictions are, and
stand for them…Therefore it is wise to be as clear as possible about one’s subjective
principles.” Socrates stated, “One of the most important precepts of wisdom is to know
oneself.”
A thorough understanding of oneself is not optional for the true warrior. It is absolutely
necessary. This should be a top priority for you throughout your journey. It is self-
knowledge that allows you to live a life of excellence; without it, you cannot possibly
develop your life to the fullest. Socrates even went as far as to say, “The unexamined life is
not worth living.” This is a pretty strong endorsement of self-knowledge!
Self-knowledge gives you insight, not only into what areas of your life need to be changed,
but also into what truly matters to you. You only live on this planet once, as far as you
know, so it is important that you live the kind of life that you want to live. That includes
being who you really are and living by your beliefs. If you aren’t clear on what you want out
of life or what you truly believe, then how can you possibly live the life you want to live?
How can you be true to yourself and your principles? You can’t!
Shakespeare wrote, “This above all; to thine own self be true.” You have to understand
yourself thoroughly in order to be true to your own self – to the beliefs and principles that
you hold dear. The warrior’s introspection is vitally important to his growth. The Hagakure,
the famous Samurai book of wisdom, tells us, “Only those who continually re-examine
themselves and correct their faults will grow.” The key word in this quote is “continually.”
Self-knowledge is not a process where you can go into meditation for a few hours, discover
your true self, and then mark off it your to-do list. It, like all of the traits of the warrior
lifestyle, is an ongoing process – not a one-time discovery. Self-knowledge is continuous.
Nothing in this world is static; everything is constantly changing, and that includes you.
Therefore, it is important that you continually monitor yourself and stay on top of the
changes which take place in your life. Dag Hammarskjold stated that, “The longest journey
is the journey inward.” This is because that journey is not only adventurous, but also never-
ending.
You will not be the exact same person this time next year as you are now. Once you develop
your core principles and overall code of honor, they will stay the same for the most part,
but even then, you will need to continually scrutinize yourself, your attitude, and your
adherence to the life that you have chosen to live. It is up to you to ensure that you live a
life of excellence and work to maintain your strengths and to improve your weaknesses.
Nobody else really cares or will do it for you.
Whether or not you live a life of excellence rests solely on your own shoulders, and you
absolutely cannot live a life of excellence without knowing yourself intimately. There is an
old Indian proverb which states, “He who has studied himself is his own master.” You must
be your own master and guide your life in the desired direction.
Self-knowledge is the foundation for any improvements in your life - mental, spiritual, or
physical. You have to know where you are, what your limits may be, what your current
knowledge base is, and where you want to be. No matter what area of your life you focus
on, self-knowledge has to be the starting point for self-improvement. Yes, this even
includes your martial arts.
Think about it, you had certainly better know your initial limits before you start training, or
you will end up pushing yourself too far and end up with an injury that will set your goals
back. In your physical training, just as with all other areas of your life, you have to know
what kind of shape you are in to start with. You have to know what your weak points are
and what your strengths are. If you are very inflexible and either do not know this, or
ignore this fact, and you try to throw a high kick, chances are you are going to end up
pulling a muscle or worse.
Self-knowledge also plays a part in your self-defense. You must know your own capabilities
and evaluate them honestly. There is a famous quote by Sun Tzu which illustrates this
point. Sun Tzu wrote, “Know the enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles you will
never be in peril. When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself, your chances of
winning or losing are equal. If ignorant both of your enemy and of yourself, you are certain
in every battle to be in peril.”
If you don’t truly know what your abilities are and you overestimate your skills, you are
putting yourself in danger if you ever find yourself in a true life-or-death situation. There is
an Italian proverb which states, “He who is an ass and takes himself to be a stag, finds his
mistake when he comes to leap the ditch.” In the middle of a self-defense situation is not a
good time to find out that you don’t have the skills that you thought you had.
You have to evaluate yourself honestly when you are being introspective. It does you no
good to be dishonest with yourself and fool yourself into thinking that you are something
more than you actually are. Appraise yourself honestly. Only then can you see things clearly
and start to improve your life. Sometimes this can be difficult to do, especially for the
warrior whose skills are not where they once were.
Charles Spurgeon wrote, “It is foolish to try to live on past experience. It is a very
dangerous, if not fatal habit, to judge ourselves to be safe because of something that we felt
or did twenty years ago.” Things change and you must be aware of those changes in your
life. Perfecting your character is an ongoing process. Staying in shape is an ongoing process.
Monitoring these things, understanding who you are and what you believe, and keeping
track of where you stand is simply part of the process of living life to the fullest. This is true
self-knowledge, and is a part of being truly prepared to live a successful life.

Meditations on Self-Knowledge

If a man does not keep pace with his companions,


perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music which he hears,
however measured or far away.
Thoreau
We must find out what we really are
and what we really want.
Nelson Boswell
Knowing others is wisdom,
knowing yourself is Enlightenment.
Lao Tzu
This above all: to thine own self be true.
William Shakespeare
We should know what our convictions are, and
stand for them… Therefore it is wise to be as
clear as possible about one’s subjective principles.
Carl Jung
It is a first principle that in order to improve yourself,
you must first know yourself.
Baltasar Gracian
One of the most important precepts
of wisdom is to know oneself.
Socrates
Ninety percent of the world’s woe comes
from people not knowing themselves…
Most of us go almost all the way through
life as complete strangers to ourselves.
Sydney J. Harris
The unexamined life is not worth living.
Socrates
One may conquer in battle a thousand times a thousand men,
yet he is the best of conquerors who conquers himself.
The Dhammapada
Only those who continually re-examine themselves
and correct their faults will grow.
The Hagakure
The longest journey is the journey inward.
Dag Hammarskjold
He who has studied himself is his own master.
Indian Proverb
No man can be master of himself,
who does not first understand himself.
Baltasar Gracian

Chapter 17
Preparedness
The Spirit of Readiness
Preparedness: The state of full readiness; readiness for action; attentiveness, watchfulness,
awareness, or vigilance.
Readiness for action definitely applies to the true warrior. The warrior must continually be
in a state of full readiness for action, which means that he must be as prepared as possible
for whatever may come his way. He must be vigilant where his preparedness is concerned,
carefully examining himself daily so that he truly understands how prepared he is to meet
different challenges.
Problems and challenges never come when you would like them to; they come when they
come. Therefore, the warrior has to stay in a state of readiness to meet whatever may come
his way. You hear many martial artists talk about how important this attitude is, at the
same time, few of them seem to take this seriously. Their actions do not seem to match
their words. As Emerson said, “A man’s action is only a picture book of his creed.” The
warrior’s actions should match his creed or his beliefs.
If you really believe that it is important to be prepared to handle whatever challenges may
come your way, then you should believe that you must train to be prepared. There is no
way that you will be prepared if you don’t take action to make yourself prepared. The state
of full readiness doesn’t just automatically happen. You have to train to develop this
attitude of mind and spirit, and the preparation of physical skills. Just like all of the other
traits of the warrior lifestyle, you have to work to attain the state of preparedness.
The truth is, attaining the state of total preparedness takes more work than most of the
other traits of the true warrior. In fact, it would be impossible to be prepared for every
single thing that could ever happen, unless maybe your name is MacGyver. What
preparedness means to the warrior is being as prepared as possible to successfully
encounter whatever difficulties may come his way. It doesn’t mean he is totally prepared
for every single possible problem. It would be impractical to walk around daily with a
backpack full of supplies ranging from a snakebite kit to climbing gear.
Although it is impractical to think that anyone can be completely prepared for anything at
anytime, and will always have all the tools he needs at his disposal, you can be mentally and
physically prepared for a multitude of problems. You may not walk around daily carrying a
snakebite kit, but you can walk around with the knowledge of how to treat a snake bite,
should this unfortunate incident take place. Part of being prepared is obtaining knowledge
about many different things, and being able to recall and use that knowledge when needed.
A wide, general base of knowledge, covering many possible topics, is definitely an
important part of being prepared to meet life’s challenges. Many opportunities are lost
from lack of knowledge. Study and learn as much as you can about many different subjects;
you never know when the knowledge you obtain will come in handy or will get you out of a
tight spot. Having a vast and diverse foundation of knowledge is an important part of your
mental preparedness, but it is not the only piece of being mentally prepared to meet life’s
challenges.
Besides obtaining knowledge on many different subjects, you also have to train your mind
to be prepared to handle emergency situations or physical conflicts. Being able to think
rationally and stay calm in an emergency situation does not come naturally; you have to
train your mind to handle high stress situations, just like you train any other part of your
body. There are many techniques that you can use to train your mind to be prepared to
handle life’s unexpected challenges.
Meditation and visualization are both excellent tools to prepare your mind to remain calm
and rational in stressful times. Also, many martial arts instructors are now moving more
towards reality based training to train students to handle the different effects that stress
and adrenaline have on the body during a physical confrontation. In addition, there are
many breathing techniques which aid the warrior in consciously keeping his mind calm
during high stress times.
The point is you have to train your mind just like you train your body. I would recommend
that you use all of the above training techniques in preparing your mind to successfully
handle stressful situations. If you consistently integrate a combination of these four
training techniques into your daily training, you will begin to see a difference in your
mental preparedness very quickly. Let’s look at each of these in a little more detail.
Although I will cover meditation is a separate chapter, I do want to give you a brief
overview of it here for the purposes of mental preparedness. Meditation is very important
to the warrior who wants to live the warrior lifestyle, and not just for the purposes of
mental preparedness. There are many benefits to meditation, but I will limit my discussion
here to how meditation helps prepare your mind to meet whatever challenges you may
encounter.
One of the key skills in any physical encounter is to be able to maintain a calm, rational
thought process, even when your adrenalin is pumping and you are under high stress.
Meditation can help with this. The more you meditate, the more you will find your mind
remains in a calm state, no matter what is happening outside of your mind. Consistent
meditational practices definitely aid in keeping your mind calm and stable. It is just like any
other skill; the more you practice it, the better you get at it and the more benefits you
receive from it.
The key, when it comes to meditation, is consistency. You can’t simply meditate every now
and then and expect to see great results, anymore than you can expect to practice your
martial arts every once and a while and perfect your techniques. The key to success in any
endeavor is consistency. You have to commit yourself to whatever you are doing, and this
includes meditation.
It is best to set aside a special time each day for your meditation practice. Also, you will
want to have a special place that you go for meditation, somewhere where you will not be
disturbed. By practicing at the same time, and in the same place each day, you will train
your body and mind to go into meditation at this time and when you are in this place.
Consistently practice meditation and you will begin to see some amazing results.
The next technique is fairly close to meditating. In fact, it is a form of meditation in itself.
I’m talking about visualization. Every martial artist uses visualization, even if he doesn’t
realize that he is doing so. Visualization is simply seeing or visualizing certain things in
your mind. If you are a martial artist, I can almost guarantee you that you have imagined
yourself protecting someone, or fighting off some thug who was trying to attack you. This is
a normal process of your imagination, and this is what I mean when I talk about
visualization.
Visualization is basically the process of making a movie in your mind. You want to see
yourself in many different situations, using your martial arts skills or your de-escalation
skills to walk away from specific conflicts victoriously. The key to successful visualization is
that you always see yourself being victorious. You don’t want to visualize yourself screwing
up or making mistakes. Visualizing yourself losing or messing up, is like practicing your
martial arts skills incorrectly, over and over again.
In the practice of visualization, see yourself performing each skill perfectly. When you
practice visualization, see all the details. See yourself saying exactly the right thing, at the
right time. See yourself throwing perfect kicks and punches. See yourself successfully
countering anything which your opponent throws at you. Are you starting to understand?
Perfect practice makes perfect techniques, and that is what you want to develop through
your visualization practice.
This brings me to reality based training. In your visualization practice, you want to make
things as realistic as possible, while making sure you always win. Reality based training
works on the same principle by preparing your mind to deal with real problems. In reality
based training, instructors will play the role of the predator. They will get in your face,
scream at you, curse at you, and try their best to push your buttons, just as some thug
would do in the streets.
Even though you realize that this is role play, it still has the same effect as a real assault
would on your mind. It gets your adrenalin pumping and puts stress on your mind.
Sometimes it will make you angry. This is all a part of the process. The purpose of reality
training is to allow you to experience these emotions and the feeling of trying to control
your temper while some jerk is in your face, screaming obscenities at you and shoving you.
This is especially good practice for someone who has never experienced a real fight, but it
is helpful for everyone. It gives you vital practice in de-escalating volatile situations and
allows you to practice self-control while your adrenaline is pushing you to attack. It would
serve you well to find an instructor who integrates this form of practice into his training.
The last technique I want to go over with you is autogenic breathing. Many people from
cops to martial artists use this technique to remain calm in stressful situations. It is easy to
learn and works like a charm once you have practiced it for a while. The purpose is to keep
your mind and body calm, no matter what is happening outside of your mind.
Here is how it works. It is simply breathing, but with a catch. You breathe in through your
nose, slowly for a count of four. Then hold your breath for a count of six, and slowly breathe
out of your mouth for a count of four again. Do several cycles of this breathing pattern and
you will find that both your mind and your body will become more relaxed. You can do this
as often as you need to. There are many other breathing techniques to explore, but this one
is simple and can be used quickly in most any situation.
While mental preparedness is vital, it is equally important for you to keep your body in
good shape. We have all seen the comedian in the movies who has been taking martial arts
classes, and who is unexpectedly accosted by some thug. When he is about to be attacked,
the comedian says, “Hold on a minute while I stretch,” and the thug looks at him as if he is
crazy. In the real world, this is crazy!
Thugs attack you in order to overtake you in the fastest, easiest way possible. They hope
you aren’t prepared for their assault, and they certainly aren’t going to give you some extra
time to get prepared out of some sense of fair play. You have to be prepared before you run
into trouble. You have to be preparing for this moment daily. This is what your physical
training is all about. If you allow your laziness or melancholy attitude to get in the way of
your training today, you will not be prepared for the unexpected challenge tomorrow.
Musashi put it this way, “Study strategy over the years and achieve the spirit of the warrior.
Today is victory over yourself of yesterday; tomorrow is your victory over lesser men.”
What you do today determines how prepared you will be for tomorrow’s challenge. To be
prepared, you have to continue your training and keep your body in good physical
condition. This includes weight training, stretching, weapons training, and your martial
arts training.
Furthermore, if you go back to the definition of preparedness, you will notice that the third
definition is: attentiveness, watchfulness, awareness, or vigilance. Being aware of your
surroundings is an important part of being prepared to meet, or more importantly, to
avoid, possible dangers. The concept of awareness goes hand in hand with being prepared
to meet life’s challenges. Awareness means noticing or realizing something, or being well-
informed about what is going on in the world around you. It is also obtaining knowledge
about something from having observed it or heard it.
You cannot be prepared in this world without some degree of awareness of what is
happening in the world around you. In short, awareness is the way of conscious living. Too
many people simply walk through life on auto-pilot, not paying attention to the world
around them. You see them walking with their heads down, oblivious to everything else.
They are lost in their own little world, completely focused on whatever is tiptoeing through
their minds at the moment, with little care about anything else. This is not a state of
preparedness.
In order to be truly prepared, you have to be mindful of what is going on around you, both
in your immediate presence, and in your world in general. Being truly prepared to defend
yourself doesn’t merely mean that you know how to fight, but rather that you know how to
avoid fighting. As Sun Tzu taught in The Art of War, “He is victorious who knows when and
when not to fight.” The master of self-defense is also a master of awareness.
Like mental preparedness, awareness includes much more than being aware of your
immediate surroundings, although that is definitely very important. Awareness also refers
to being aware of how prepared you actually are and knowing what your state of
preparedness actually is. You need to be aware of how prepared you are to meet certain
situations. Are you mentally prepared to defend yourself? How far are you willing to go to
protect your life or the life or your loved ones? Are your physical skills at a point where you
can defend yourself or are you merely under the illusion that you can defend yourself?
These are all questions which you have to know the answer to in order to be truly prepared
to successfully deal with an unexpected physical conflict. You have to be aware of what you
can and cannot do. Know your current limitations so that you don’t find yourself in a tough
spot from either overconfidence or foolish pride. Barry Long stated, “The state of
awareness is the state in which you see things as they are.” This is very important for the
warrior.
It is so easy to see things as you want them to be instead of as they truly are, but this is
dangerous for the warrior. You have to judge your spiritual, mental and physical
preparedness soberly. It is vital that you evaluate yourself honestly. It does no good to
convince yourself that you are prepared to defend yourself, when in reality, you don’t have
the skills you really need to be truly prepared. This self-deception is unhelpful at best, and
downright dangerous at worst.
Preparedness is one of the cornerstones of the warrior lifestyle. That is why we train so
hard in what is, for the most part, a peaceful society. You may never be called on to use
your martial arts skills in a real life-or-death situation, but one thing is for sure, if you don’t
have those skills when you need them, you will be in trouble.
For the warrior, being prepared means that you are ready to handle a challenge before it
slaps you across the face, not afterwards. Living in full readiness to meet life’s challenges
doesn’t mean you are un-relaxed or always on edge; it means that you have been true to
your training and that you are living in a state of awareness.

Meditations on Preparedness

The art of war teaches us to rely not on the likelihood of the


enemy’s not coming, but on our own readiness to receive
him; not on the chance of his not attacking, but rather on
the fact that we have made our position unassailable.
Sun Tzu
Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear,
but around in awareness.
James Thurber
The key to growth is the introduction of higher
dimensions of consciousness into our awareness.
Lao Tzu
By keeping your weapons in order,
your enemy will be subjugated.
Nagarjuna
Do not be tricked into thinking that there are
no crocodiles just because the water is still.
Malaysian Proverb
Survival favors the prepared mind.
Robert Crowley
Avoiding danger is not cowardice.
Philippine Proverb
The state of awareness is the state in
which you see things as they are.
Barry Long
What is necessary to change a person
is to change his awareness of himself.
Abraham Maslow
For opportunity knocks at your door just once,
and in many cases you have to decide and to act quickly.
Francesco Guicciardini
You must be deadly serious in training.
Gichin Funakoshi
To be prepared for war is one of the
most effective means of preserving peace.
George Washington
He does not guard himself well
who is not always on his guard.
French Proverb
Tomorrow’s battle is won during today’s practice.
Samurai Maxim
Even in the sheath the knife must be sharp.
Finnish Proverb

Chapter 18
Benevolence
The Warrior’s Heart
Benevolence: Showing kindness or goodwill; being charitable; performing good or charitable
acts without seeking to make a profit.
Many people falsely assume that the warrior is a cruel, callous individual who lives to fight
and inflict pain on his poor victims. Why else would he train in martial arts and learn all
those violent skills that can do severe damage on the human body? People tend to see
warriors as the big, dumb brute that is all muscle and no heart for other people. Although
this may be true in the case of some people who call themselves warriors, it is not the case
for the true warrior.
The true warrior is a man of compassion and love for his fellow man. He never wants to
inflict pain on someone else or to be forced into a situation that will require him to severely
injure someone. The idea that he loves this type of conflict is erroneous. He is a man of
peace, right down to his core, but he understands what George Washington stated, “To be
prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.”
He doesn’t go out hoping to find some poor sap in which to prove his prowess in the
martial arts. He is not a sadistically violent man who enjoys dominating people who are
less skilled or less trained than he is. He is not just itching for a fight and hoping some thug
crosses his path and says or does the wrong thing so he can justify giving him a good, well
deserved beating. The true warrior is none of these things.
The truth is that the true warrior is a man of peace, love and charity. The father of Shotokan
karate, Gichin Funakoshi, taught, “Make benevolence your lifelong duty.” Master Funakoshi
didn’t say try to be nice to people every once and a while. He didn’t say be kind to people
when you are in a good mood. He didn’t say be benevolent to those who treat you right.
What he said, very matter-of-factly, was that benevolence is the lifelong duty of the true
warrior. It is your duty!
I have already discussed the importance of duty in previous chapters. When you develop
your code of honor, spend some serious time in meditation and reflection, deciding what is
important in your life – what your principles are and what your duties to those around you
are. Benevolence should be integrated throughout your code of honor; it should be one of
the cornerstones of your way of life. So, what exactly is benevolence?
Benevolence is showing kindness or goodwill towards your fellow men. It is having
compassion for the sufferings or troubles of others, and the desire to help them. It is having
a kind heart and feeling sympathy for other people, and being willing to do what you can to
help others with their lives. Now you may be thinking, I wanted to read about the qualities
of the warrior, not the priest, and that is exactly what you are doing. Benevolence is a very
important quality of the warrior.
Let’s look at this in a little more detail. The warrior has spent many hours training in
martial arts. He knows how to fight, both to protect himself and to protect others. Now,
here’s the question. Why would anyone in his right mind put his life in jeopardy to protect
someone else if he did not have a heart of compassion and kindness towards other people?
Sure, there are those macho guys out there who just like to fight, but we are talking about
true warriors here, those who are dedicated to the warrior lifestyle, not merely trained
ruffians.
True warriors feel a duty to keep those around them safe and protected. They feel empathy
for those weaker than themselves and feel a strong urge to help them as much as they can.
This is part of the code that they live by, and it is part of living the warrior lifestyle. Arnold
Schopenhauer stated, “Compassion is the basis of morality.” This is why the warrior is
willing to put his life on the line to help or protect others. It is this sense of duty and honor
which causes someone to get involved in certain risky situations instead of turning a blind
eye and merely walking away, justifying his actions by thinking that the situation was
“none of his business.”
The warrior doesn’t think like that. If he is able to help, and he sees someone who is in
desperate need of assistance, he considers it his business. This is definitely not meant to
say that you should go around sticking your nose in everyone’s business. That is not what I
am saying at all. Of course you should mind your own business. But if you are walking
down the street and you see someone being mugged or who has just been mugged, honor
demands that you stop and help.
William Penn wrote, “I expect to pass through life but once. If, therefore, there be any
kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do for my fellow being, let me do it now…as I
shall not pass this way again.” Benevolence is not simply putting your life on the line to
help others; it is an internal attitude towards other people. It does not always require that
you take some physical action. Kind words, a nice note, and even something as simple as a
smile or a pat on the back can mean more than you know to someone who is having a hard
time.
William Makepeace Thackeray stated, “Never lose a chance of saying a kind word.” There is
a Japanese proverb which echoes this sentiment stating, “One kind word warms three
winter months.” Sai Baba taught, “To a person struggling in the sea of life a few uplifting
words may be of great help.” You simply never know how much a very small gesture of
kindness will mean to another person. It could be life-changing for him and you most likely
will never know how much that one effortless comment changed his life.
Everyone has his own set of problems in life. You never really know what kind of struggles
someone else is dealing with, and you don’t want to add to his problems. Of course many
people bring their problems on themselves, but that doesn’t make them any less painful,
and that fact is really none of your business. Remember, you are responsible for your own
actions, not the actions of others. Judging whether or not someone is worthy of your
kindness or compassion is not your duty; your duty is making sure that you act with the
heart of the warrior.
While it is true that many people cause their own heartaches, that fact doesn’t exempt you
from your duty of acting with a benevolent heart and trying to help them when you can.
Scott Adams said, “Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act
creates a ripple with no logical end.” You just plain don’t know how much that small act of
kindness or compassion may change someone’s life. And the effects of it may not only
change that person’s life, but could change the lives of other people through that person.
The ripple effect could go on and on.
This brings me to the question of how do you develop benevolence in your heart if it does
not come naturally to you. The answer is that you must put yourself in the other person’s
place. How would you feel if you were in his shoes? Would it matter if you caused your own
problems or if they came from some outside source? Would the source of your problems
matter as far as making them any easier to live with? How would you want others to treat
you if you were hurting or in need?
If you put yourself in the other person’s place and try to think from his point of view, you
will find that you won’t have a problem having compassion for this person. Maxwell Maltz
wrote, “Take the trouble to stop and think of the other person’s feelings, his viewpoints, his
desires and needs. Think more of what the other fellow wants, and how he must feel.”
I touched on the fact that you may think that someone doesn’t deserve your kindness or
compassion because of how they act or what they have done, but this is the wrong attitude
to have. Again, you are not responsible for how other people act. You are responsible for
your actions and for living up to the standards that you have set for yourself. Yes, other
people will act like jerks. They will be ungracious and rude. They will be and do many
things that you will find offensive, but this doesn’t excuse you from living by your own high
standards.
There will be days when you don’t want to be nice to other people, days when you have had
so much garbage dumped on your doorstep that you just feel that you have nothing left to
give to anyone. When you start to feel this way, you know that your life has become out of
balance and you should stop and take time for yourself. Meditate and get rebalanced.
Everyone has stress and problems, including you. Don’t get into the habit of putting
everyone else first and ignoring your own needs.
As with everything on this earth, you can go overboard in this area by constantly putting
others first and not taking care of your own needs. Sir Francis Osborne warned, “In seeking
to save another, beware of drowning yourself.” If you don’t take care of your own needs,
spiritually, mentally, and physically, you will never have enough to give to others. If your
teapot is bone dry, how can you share tea with anyone else? Make sure you don’t forget to
have compassion for yourself too.
Everyone on this planet makes mistakes and many times the consequences of those
mistakes can be heartbreaking. Consider this when dealing with other people and
observing their lives. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote, “The little I have seen of this
world teaches me to look upon the errors of others in sorrow, not in anger.” Everyone is
fighting some kind of battle in his or her life, remember this and make a benevolent
attitude part of who you truly are and a part of your standard of living.

Meditations on Benevolence

One kind word warms three winter months.


Japanese Proverb
Never lose a chance of saying a kind word.
William Makepeace Thackeray
We should give as we would receive,
cheerfully, quickly, and without hesitation;
for there is no grace in a benefit that sticks to the fingers.
Seneca
If you have much give of your wealth,
if you have little give of your heart.
Arab Proverb
To a person struggling in the sea of life a
few uplifting words may be of great help.
Sai Baba
I expect to pass through life but once.
If, therefore, there be any kindness I can show,
or any good thing I can do for my fellow being,
let me do it now…as I shall not pass this way again.
William Penn
Have benevolence towards all living things.
The Tattvartha Sutra
Compassion is the basis of morality.
Arnold Schopenhauer
Take the trouble to stop and think of the other person’s
feelings, his viewpoints, his desires and needs. Think more
of what the other fellow wants, and how he must feel.
Maxwell Maltz
Do not let the ingratitude of many men deter you from doing
good to others. To do good without ulterior motive is
a generous and almost divine thing in itself.
Francesco Guicciardini
The little I have seen of this world teaches me to look
upon the errors of others in sorrow, not in anger.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
You cannot do a kindness too soon,
for you never know how soon will be too late.
Emerson
Remember there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness.
Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.
Scott Adams

Chapter 19
Courtesy
The Art of Civility
Courtesy: Polite or considerate behavior; consideration for other people or good manners;
something done out of politeness or consideration for another person.
Epictetus wrote that you should, “Lay down for yourself, at the outset, a certain stamp and
type of character for yourself, which you are to maintain whether you are by yourself or are
meeting with people.” This is very good advice. Part of this “stamp” should be that you
always treat people with courtesy, especially if you are a true warrior. This is another one
of those traits that you develop, not because other people deserve it, but because it is in line
with the person you have decided to be.
Goethe stated that, “A man’s manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait.” The
person who has decided to live the warrior lifestyle has made a conscious decision
concerning the kind of person he wants to be. He has decided to live his life according to a
specific code and specific principles, and he understands that it is his actions which
ultimately define him. He has decided to live by higher standards than the average person,
and being considerate of others is a part of those standards.
Good manners say more about you than about the person you are conversing with at the
time. You don’t have to treat people politely or be considerate of their feelings. There is no
law which states that you have to be courteous to others. Being courteous is simply a way
of both showing respect for those around you and holding yourself to a standard of
excellence in your own personal behavior.
Courtesy is merely being polite to other people and being considerate of their feelings.
Although there may be times when you don’t feel like being courteous, do your best to get
past the strong urge to be curt to someone else, even if he actually deserves it. Remember,
manners say more about you than the other person, and courtesy simply boils down to
good manners. Just because someone else is acting like a jerk, that is no excuse for you to
do the same. Gracian wrote, “The man of principle never forgets what he is, because of what
others are.”
This is a quote that every warrior should think about daily. You are not responsible for how
other people act; you are only responsible for how you act. If someone is acting crude and
inconsiderate, that tells those around him something about his character. But if you allow
his actions to influence how you act, then you are lowering yourself to his level. This is not
the way of the warrior. Warriors do not lower themselves to the standards of other people;
they live independently, according to their own standards and code of honor.
If you allow the actions of others to influence your actions, as far as things such as courtesy,
consideration of others, or kindness go, you have veered off the path of the warrior. This is
how the average person behaves. The true warrior, who takes the warrior lifestyle
seriously, does not use the behavior of others as an excuse to act inappropriately. Let’s look
at an example of what I am trying to explain to you.
Let’s say you are shopping at your local grocery store filled with several elderly people, and
some punk is walking down the aisle loudly spouting profanity, offending these elderly
ladies. If you approach him in a polite way and show him the error of his ways, there is
nothing wrong with that. But if you approach him, loudly rip him, with some four letter
words of your own, and put him in his place, you have been just as discourteous to those in
the store as he was.
You let his actions upset you and you lost your temper, when in fact, you could have
accomplished the same goal without lowering yourself to his standard of behavior. You do
not have to be rude or discourteous to get your point across. Philip Dormer Stanhope
wrote, “An able man shows his spirit by gentle words and resolute actions; he is neither hot
nor timid.” You can be forceful and resolute without being loud and rude. As Sir John
Vanbrugh said, “Good manners and soft words have brought many a difficult thing to pass.”
Just about now I can hear you thinking, “Yeah, but this jerk didn’t deserve to be treated
with respect. He deserved to be firmly put in his place!” And you would be completely right.
The guy in my example certainly would not deserve to be treated in a courteous manner. He
was acting like a jerk and would deserve to be put in his place, but remember, there is
always a best way to do everything. As Clint Eastwood said in Unforgiven, “Deserve’s got
nothing to do with it.”
I cannot emphasize this point strongly enough – deserve has nothing to do with you being
courteous. You use good manners because that is the kind of person you have decided to
be, not because someone else deserves to be treated politely. You behave in a courteous
manner because you have decided to conduct your life in that manner – you want to be a
superior man. There is an ancient Chinese proverb which states, “Courtesy is the mark of a
civilized person.” You shouldn’t expect everyone to be courteous, they aren’t. At the same
time, how they act should not cause you to become uncivilized.
Theodore Roosevelt stated that, “Courtesy is as much a mark of a gentleman as courage.”
And Alfred Lord Tennyson wrote, “Manners are not idle, but the fruit of loyal nature and of
noble mind.” The true warrior does indeed have a noble mind, which is the root of courtesy.
Hopefully you are beginning to see that behaving in a certain manner, consistent with who
you are as a warrior, is independent of the actions of others, no matter how rude or
threatening they are acting.
Winston Churchill put it about as plainly as possible when he stated, “Even when you have
to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite.” This is a pretty strong statement concerning
your actions. If you should be polite, even if you have to end someone’s life, how much
more so should you be courteous and polite in normal, everyday interactions? Simply put,
be polite and courteous no matter what the circumstances.
Making courtesy a regular part of your normal behavior is a sign of a noble man who has
refined his actions and brought them in line with his own high expectations. Matsura
Seizen stated, “Noblemen discipline themselves to be dignified at all times…Sharpen your
mind and show your dignity.” This is exactly what you are doing when you continuously
behave in a courteous manner. By acting this way consistently, people will start to
recognize your quality.
There is much more to good manners than simply how you speak to other people. Courtesy
is taught in most martial arts dojos, but as I discussed in the chapter on respect, it is not
given serious consideration in most dojos; it is only discussed on a superficial level.
Students may bow to their instructors before entering the training area, but merely going
through the motions is not truly meaningful. For manners to be truly meaningful, they have
to become a part of who you truly are deep inside, otherwise they are simply a façade.
How many people have you seen receive a favor and then respond with a half-hearted
“thank you?” This is more like an automatic reflex response than a truly, heart-felt emotion.
In short, it is an insincere response, only one step above saying nothing at all. True courtesy
originates from the heart and the spirit. It is an essential part of who you are and it comes
out when you interact with others. It is the art of civility combined with the heart of
sincerity.
Courtesy includes things such as gratitude, politeness, civility, and punctuality. Yes,
punctuality! It seems that not many people see punctuality as a part of being courteous in
today’s society, but it is. This should be common sense, but common sense is also becoming
a rarity today. Think about it. Isn’t it impolite and rude to cause other people to waste their
time because of your tardiness? Yes, it certainly is.
Everyone has the same amount of time to spend each day, and if you are wasting someone
else’s time because of your own actions, that is both inconsiderate and rude. Of course
there are times when problems occur with circumstances beyond your control, but as a
rule, you should always be on time. Remember, one of the definitions of courtesy is
consideration for other people. If you are constantly late and inconsiderate of someone’s
time, you are being discourteous.
It is the small things such as being on time that define your manners, not just saying thank
you or behaving in specific ways according to the customs of the day. Good manners
encompass all of your actions with others, and at the end of the day, they play a big role in
defining who you truly are as a person. To quote Tennyson again, “The greater person is
one of courtesy.”
Emily Post defined manners as follows, “Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings
of others.” While this is true, manners go much deeper for the true warrior. Courtesy is not
only an awareness of the feelings of others, but it is also an awareness of who you are as a
superior man. When I refer to the superior man, I am not saying that you are superior to
others and should look down on them. This is not what I mean at all.
The superior man is one who demands excellence from himself even though it is not
required of him by anyone or anything else. He is a superior man because he pushes
himself beyond the ordinary life of the average person, and develops his life into a life of
excellence. Seek to live a noble life and make courtesy a part of who you are, not just a
window dressing. Take pains to act in a way that is consistent with who you want to be,
even when people are pushing your buttons. Always remember, your behavior tells others
who you are, so never excuse bad behavior because of how someone else is behaving.

Meditations on Courtesy

Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Manners are not idle, but the fruit of
loyal nature and of noble mind.
Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Intelligence and courtesy not always are combined;
often in a wooden house, a golden room we find.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Gratitude is the most exquisite form of courtesy.
Jacques Maritain
The small courtesies sweeten life;
the greater ennoble it.
Christian Nevell Bovee
The greater person is one of courtesy.
Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Promptitude is not only a duty,
but is also a part of good manners;
it is favorable to fortune, reputation,
influence, and usefulness.
Charles Simmons
Courtesy is as much a mark of a gentleman as courage.
Theodore Roosevelt
Clothes and manners do not make the man; but,
when he is made, they greatly improve his appearance.
Henry Ward Beecher
Courtesy is a silver lining around the dark clouds
of civilization; it is the best part of refinement
and in many ways, an art of heroic beauty in
the vast gallery of man’s cruelty and baseness.
Bryant H. McGill
Courtesy is the mark of a civilized person.
Chinese Proverb
A man’s manners are a mirror
in which he shows his portrait.
Goethe
No one is more insufferable than
he who lacks basic courtesy.
Bryant H. McGill
Good manners and soft words have
brought many a difficult thing to pass.
Sir John Vanbrugh
The test of good manners is to be able
to put up pleasantly with bad ones.
Wendell L. Willkie
Manners are a sensitive awareness
of the feelings of others.
Emily Post

Chapter 20
Spirituality
The Warrior’s Peace
Spirituality: The quality or condition of being spiritual.
The warrior’s spiritual beliefs are where his peace comes from. The definition of
spirituality is basically being spiritual, and the definition of the word spiritual is, relating to
the spirit or showing great refinement and concern with the higher things in life. Basically,
spirituality has to do with someone’s deeply held beliefs concerning things which are
beyond this material world, whether it is God, the soul, life after death, etc., but at the same
time, are integrated into life in the physical realm.
Warriors have to come to peace with the fact that they will die some day, just like everyone
else. I have already discussed the fact that the warrior should spend time in meditation and
reflection in order to truly understand his beliefs about his principles and how he wants to
live his life. His spiritual beliefs are included on the list of things which he should spend
time contemplating. Peace comes from knowing what you believe and why, and having the
utmost confidence that your beliefs are true.
This certainly holds true for the warrior’s spiritual beliefs. The warrior understands, more
than the average person, that life is a gift and that he never knows when death will come.
Warriors throughout the ages have understood this fact, have meditated concerning their
spiritual beliefs, and have made their peace with God. This doesn’t mean that all warriors
share the same religious beliefs, in fact, quite the opposite is true. Emerson put it this way,
“God enters by a private door into every individual.”
There is a difference in being spiritual and being religious. Being spiritual can be seen as
taking your beliefs in God and the spiritual world seriously, and making it a part of your
life. Being religious, on the other hand, has more to do with someone’s adherence to some
organized religion which tells someone exactly what to believe. The two can and do
overlap, but they are not exactly the same thing.
This is a subject that stirs up much debate, arguments, and hard feelings throughout the
world. This subject could fill up many books all by itself. I will only touch on it here because
it is important to the warrior to understand his beliefs concerning the spiritual world and
God. Aesop put it nicely when he wrote, “In quarreling about the shadow, we often lose the
substance.” There are way too many people out there who love to argue over people’s
spiritual and religious beliefs, but never spend the time to truly think for themselves about
why they believe what they believe. In essence, they are just following whatever crowd
they have fallen in with at the time. This is being a sheep, not a warrior.
Lao Tzu explained it this way, “Most of the world’s people worship the offspring, while one
who is spiritually mature embraces the Source and never becomes the slave of any social or
religious movement.” You have to think for yourself and spend quiet time in deep thought
to determine what you really believe. Don’t take someone else’s word for it; you take the
time to go directly to the Source yourself and listen to your spirit concerning what is true.
Most of the sages throughout the ages have believed that human beings have a soul or a
spirit, and that this spirit is the true you and will live on even after the body dies. Socrates
taught, “It is perfectly certain that the soul is immortal and imperishable, and our souls will
actually exist in another world.” This belief is almost universal around the world, as are
many of the basic religious beliefs.
If you study the beliefs of the world’s major religions, you will be shocked at how much
they agree on, and how few points they truly find themselves at odds with in their
doctrines. But those few points in which they disagree have caused major problems in the
world, and heartbreak for thousands of people. Ramakrishna stated that, “Truth is one;
only It is called by different names.” You could add to that statement that, It is called by
different names, argued about and fought over.
One has to only look at the many atrocities committed by religious people over the years to
understand that arguing over religion is counterproductive and is not something that the
truly spiritual person wants to concern himself with. The warrior should concern himself
more with true spirituality and being true to his beliefs, instead of arguing and trying to
convince others to believe as he does. Take care of your own spiritual life and allow others
to believe as they will.
Lynn Andres wrote, “We must walk in balance on the earth – a foot in spirit and a foot in
the physical.” Balance is important in everything you do. You must balance your life –
spiritually, mentally, and physically. If you leave out any one part, or you allow one part of
your life to receive the vast majority of your attention, you will find that your life becomes
unbalanced and is not working as it should. The correct balance is vital.
The key to this balance is to make sure that all of the parts of your life are connected.
Spirituality isn’t a completely separate part, or at least it shouldn’t be, although for many
people it is because they keep their spirituality completely segregated. By doing this, they
make their spirituality something separate from themselves; almost like it is something
mystical that they do one day a week or at a certain time each day. This is not the way it
should be.
As with everything else in his life, the true warrior takes his spirituality seriously. It is not
something that he focuses on for 30 minutes during his meditation or for an hour during
some church service – it is a vital part of who he is, just like the other traits of the warrior
lifestyle. The warrior doesn’t compartmentalize the parts of his life into separate lock boxes
which he pulls out when he wants to use them. He lives his life sincerely. His spirituality is
as much a part of who he is as his martial arts or his code of honor. The warrior’s
spirituality is a part of who he truly is as a person.
The warrior should be clear concerning his beliefs about spirituality. I have already
discussed how he should strive to live his life to the best of his ability every day, as well as
being prepared for whatever unexpected challenges life may have for him. Integrating your
spirituality into everything you do is actually a part of living a life of excellence. It is a part
of the warrior lifestyle, and it shouldn’t be a separate part, but rather a part of the whole.
Don’t compartmentalize the different parts of your life. Be who you truly are and make
everything, from your code of honor to your spirituality, merge into your one true self. You
can think of this process kind of like a recipe. If you are making a special sauce for your
dinner, it will have several different ingredients in it. These ingredients start off as
separate, individual parts, but once you combine them together in the right balance and
spend time cooking, stirring, and preparing the sauce, the individual parts no longer exist.
What exists is the single, unique sauce that is much better than any of the single ingredients
would be alone.
This is what happens in the life of the true warrior. He combines all the individual parts,
(spirit, mind, body) into one complete, balanced man. The individual parts no longer exist;
all that exists is the superior man. And just like the sauce, once these individual parts are
correctly combined to create this special, superior man, they no longer exist individually,
but rather are simply a part of the whole. The sum has become something greater than the
individual parts.
When you begin to integrate spiritual practices and beliefs into your journey as a warrior,
you will start to see things in a different light. You will start to understand some of the
teachings of the masters that didn’t quite make sense to you before. The importance of de-
escalation will take on a different meaning to you as you see it from both a spiritual point of
view, as well as a practical point of view. You will indeed not want to be forced to use your
deadly skills on anyone, and will never even consider doing so, except as a last resort.
Integrating spirituality into your journey, on the path of the warrior, will open your mind to
many new ideas, and will enlighten you concerning some topics which you have heard
about but never quite grasped, such as the idea of energy. The concept of energy, (chi or ki)
is intertwined in many martial arts styles. Some of what is passed on concerning energy is
superstition and some is not.
There are many aspects of spirituality to explore and much to learn and to consider. Don’t
be afraid to read the many writings concerning different religions and beliefs. Reading and
exploring different forms of spirituality doesn’t mean you accept what you read or that you
are being unfaithful to your religion, if you are already religious. It is simply part of your
quest for knowledge. Never be afraid of gaining knowledge; what you should fear is
remaining ignorant. The more you know, the more you understand about the workings of
our world.
The warrior’s spirituality goes hand in hand with his quest to develop his character and his
honor. Take your spiritual beliefs seriously. All of the traits of the warrior lifestyle are
important. To continue with my recipe analogy, you can look at each of the traits of the
warrior lifestyle as one of the ingredients of the recipe for the true warrior. If you leave out
one or more of the ingredients, the final creation will be just a little off.
The purpose of this chapter is not to tell you what to believe or to persuade you to believe
as I do, but to get the point across to you that spirituality is a fundamental part of the
warrior lifestyle. Study the many ancient texts, use what you find useful, and discard what
doesn’t resonate with your spirit. Take time to explore your spirituality.

Meditations on Spirituality

We must walk in balance on the earth –


a foot in spirit and a foot in the physical.
Lynn Andrews
Do not become attached to this temporary physical body;
use the body as a tool. Consider yourself as separate
from this destructive body, which has been created
out of the blending of the five elements.
Sai Baba
It is perfectly certain that the soul
is immortal and imperishable,
and our souls will actually exist in another world.
Socrates
Truth is one; only It is called by different names.
Ramakrishna
God enters by a private door into every individual.
Emerson
Apprehend God in all things, for God is in all things.
Meister Eckhart
There is only one Universal Way,
but from different perspectives it is given different names.
Lao Tzu
All things share the same true nature.
Bodhidharma
When the One Great Scorer comes to write
against your name, He marks, not that you
won or lost, but how you played the game.
Grantland Rice
Know that you are always in God’s Presence.
The Kabbalah
We are all children of the one God.
God is listening to me.
The sun, the darkness, the winds,
are all listening to what we now say.
Geronimo
The Great Spirit sees and hears
everything, and He never forgets.
In-Mut-Too-Yah-Lat-Lat
For the kingdom of God is within you.
Jesus
Tao is the Being that resides in all beings.
Tai Gong Diao
Man sees only what is visible,
but the Lord sees into the heart.
The Book of Proverbs

Chapter 21
Meditation
The Inner Secret
Meditation: The emptying or concentration of mind: the emptying of the mind of thoughts, or
the concentration of the mind on one thing, in order to aid mental or spiritual development,
contemplation, or relaxation; pondering of something: the act of thinking about something
carefully, calmly, seriously, and for some time.
Meditation carries two meanings for the warrior and both are important in his quest to live
the warrior lifestyle. The most common definition of meditation is that of sitting quietly
and emptying the mind of outside thoughts. The other definition is contemplating or
carefully considering something. This is commonly what people mean when they say that
they will meditate on a question or a problem. The true warrior should integrate both
forms of meditation into his life. Let’s look at the second definition first.
There are many things which the warrior must give some serious thought to concerning
the warrior lifestyle. From seriously thinking about what he truly believes to pondering
why he holds certain principles to be important, the warrior spends more time meditating
on what is important to him than the average person. The average, everyday guy mostly
goes through life without giving these things much thought, doing whatever gives him
pleasure or whatever he finds himself in the mood for at the moment.
As I have said before, the warrior takes the things in his life a bit more seriously than the
average guy. He knows the importance of spending quality time meditating on his
principles and developing his own personal codes – his code of honor and his code of
ethics. This takes time spent alone with his thoughts, in quiet contemplation. He has to shut
out all of the outside distractions and focus his mind seriously on the topic at hand. With all
of the outside distractions which we all have at our fingertips, this is something that is
easier said than done.
I must also make an important distinction concerning meditating on your problems or
objectives. Giving serious thought to an issue is not the same thing as constantly worrying
about it. Worrying about a problem is never constructive or helpful. Actually, worrying
about a problem only causes you more stress and prevents you from being able to develop
a rational strategy to improve your situation. This is not what I mean when I say that you
should seriously think about a problem or solution.
If you will notice, the last definition of meditation, at the top of the previous page, is the act
of thinking about something carefully, calmly, seriously, and for some time. This is vastly
different from worrying about it, which is more along the lines of thinking about something
in a semi-panicked state and replaying everything that could happen, over and over again
in your mind. See the difference? Meditating on something is done in a careful, purposeful
way, calmly, seriously, and rationally. Worrying doesn’t include any of those
characteristics.
Yes, this can be hard to do, especially when the challenge you are facing is serious and
carries with it some serious consequences, but it is also important to develop this ability.
Which brings me to the question of how do you learn to develop this ability? How is one
able to control his thoughts and his mind? The answer is meditation. I know, this sounds a
bit like a Zen koan. How do you learn to control your mind and meditate on a specific topic?
You learn to successfully meditate on something by learning the art of meditation.
In this case, I am referring to the first definition of meditation – the art of emptying the
mind. There are many advantages to meditation. Meditation lowers your stress level,
decreases anxiety (worry), decreases depression, irritability and moodiness, improves
memory and learning ability, improves creativity, aids in focusing the mind, increases
emotional stability, and has many other health benefits which I won’t list here.
As you can clearly see, traditional meditation can indeed help you learn to control your
mind and focus more successfully on whatever issue you need to focus on to find the
answers you seek. Thus, you learn to successfully meditate (contemplate) on something by
learning the art of meditation. There are many books, CD’s and DVD’s on the market which
teach you how to meditate, and there are many different meditation techniques that you
may want to learn.
The easiest way to start meditating is to start slow, with very short sessions, 5-10 minutes
at a time. Just sit in a comfortable position, with your spine straight, and clear your mind of
all thoughts. While this may sound easy, it can be a challenge. Thoughts will continually
enter your mind. Just let them go. The trick is to acknowledge them but refuse to think
about them. When you notice a thought has entered your mind, refuse to dwell on it – just
let it fade away. Soon you will find that this process gets easier and easier, and you can
meditate for longer periods of time.
There are also other kinds of meditations. You can successfully empty your mind by
focusing on a single point such as a candle flame or a mandala. These kinds of meditations
involve staring at a specific point and concentrating your focus on that one point, clearing
your mind of everything but the object, and just letting your mind go blank. Another
meditation to help you control your thoughts is to focus on your breathing and count your
breaths as they slowly go in and out.
There are too many techniques to learn for me to cover them all in this short chapter, but I
do want to mention one other one before I move on – guided meditations. There is a
company called Brain Sync which produces meditation CD’s which are recorded at specific
frequencies to induce specific brainwaves. These CD’s have both a guided track and a track
with only music or sounds, and are excellent for both the novice and the more experienced
practitioner.
This is merely a very quick overview of meditation techniques and what meditation is. I
suggest you do some research on the art of meditation and experiment with different
techniques until you find the technique that fits your style and that you are comfortable
using on a regular basis. And yes, you should get in the habit of meditating on a regular
basis, daily is best. Once you get the art of meditation down, I recommend meditating once
in the morning and once at night.
While meditation tends to be a part of the warrior lifestyle that many warriors neglect, it
shouldn’t be. They wrongly look at mediation as some “new age mumbo-jumbo” and think
that it is a waste of time that they could be using in their martial arts training or some other
physical activity. This is wrong thinking. I listed only a few of the benefits that meditation
provides for the warrior; there are many more.
Meditation helps the warrior to control his thoughts and his mind, and to remain calm
during stressful situations. The more that you meditate, the more you will find that you are
able to think rationally, no matter what is happening around you. As Sai Baba stated,
“Without mediation, it is not possible to control and master the mind.” Controlling your
thoughts and your mind is vitally important to the warrior, as I discussed in the chapter on
rational thought.
If your mind is in turmoil, you can’t think rationally and it will be hard to make good, clear
decisions. Meditation is the solution to this problem. Margolis stated, “Only in quiet waters
things mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the
world.” Lao Tzu echoed this philosophy teaching, “Muddy water, let stand, becomes clear.”
When you have a problem to solve and need to figure something out, sit in meditation and
let the waters of your mind clear. Continually trying to solve the problem by going over and
over it in your mind is like trying to clarify muddy water by continuing to splash around in
it; it doesn’t work. To clear the muddy water, you must let it sit quietly for a while and it
will clear up on its own. The same principle applies to your mind. When you have a
problem that you can’t figure out, you need to step away from it for a while, quiet your
mind, meditate, and let the answer come to you.
I want to touch on one more mediation technique called visualization. Most martial artists
don’t even realize that visualization is a form of meditation, but it is. Visualization is seeing
a specific image in your mind. It can be a single image of something or watching a sequence
of actions, kind of like playing a movie in your mind where you are the director, and most
likely the hero.
The practice of visualization is a form of mental practice for the warrior. It is a way to put
yourself in different scenarios and see yourself using your martial arts skills or perfecting
the art of de-escalation. To use visualization techniques you simply play the scene over and
over in your mind.
The more you practice meditation, the more benefits you will see from your endeavors. You
will find that your whole demeanor is calmer and you are better able to handle stressful
situations. Things that used to stress you out will no longer bother you as much. You will be
able to think more clearly. Your temper will become less of a problem. This list could go on
and on. The point is, meditation is a vital practice for the true warrior.
Hopefully you have grasped the importance of meditation in your life and will put it to good
use. As the Dhammapada states, “Whoever gives oneself to distractions and does not give
oneself to mediation, forgetting true purpose and grasping at pleasure, will eventually envy
the one who practices mediation.”

Meditations on Meditation

Tao is only known through silent contemplation.


To truly understand this is the beginning of enlightenment.
Lao Tzu
If during the day one feels work becoming annoying,
one should sit in meditation.
Confucius
Only in quiet waters things mirror themselves undistorted.
Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.
Margolis
Real action is in silent moments.
Emerson
Ask questions from your heart,
and you will receive answers from your heart.
Omaha Maxim
Quieten your body. Quieten your mind.
Buddha
Whoever gives oneself to distractions
And does not give oneself to meditation,
forgetting true purpose and grasping at pleasure,
will eventually envy the one who practices meditation.
The Dhammapada
Muddy water, let stand, becomes clear.
Lao Tzu
Without meditation it is not possible
to control and master the mind.
Sai Baba
Delve within; within is the foundation of good,
and it is always ready to bubble up, if you always delve.
Marcus Aurelius
Slowly but surely, reap the fruits of your meditation.
Swami Muktananda
Reading makes a full man – Meditation a profound man.
Franklin
Through meditation…
The fire of anxiety will consume you no longer,
and you will attain undying peace.
Swami Muktananda
In inner quiet lies the salvation of the spirit.
Baltasar Gracian
Without discipline, he has no understanding or inner power;
without inner power, he has no peace;
and without peace where is joy?
The Bhagavad Gita

Chapter 22
Insight
The Art of Discernment
Insight: Perceptiveness, clear perception, the ability to see clearly and intuitively into the
nature of a complex person, situation, or subject.
Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr. stated that, “A moment’s insight is sometimes worth a life’s
experience.” Insight is basically the warrior’s sense of discernment. It is his perception
concerning what is truly happening in any given situation, whether it is dealing with a
specific person, situation, or topic. Clear insight is vital to the warrior because without it,
the warrior will not have the perception or information that he needs to make well-
informed decisions.
In today’s world it seems that everyone has their own point of view concerning pretty
much everything. It doesn’t seem to matter whether or not a person is informed on the
topic in question or whether he actually knows anything at all about what he is referring to
in the conversation; people still feel the need to express their point of view. The majority of
the time, people are merely repeating what they have heard someone else say, as this is an
easy substitute for thinking for themselves.
This kind of sheep mentality, where people just follow along with the point of view that
someone else has, without taking the time to think for themselves, is the same kind of
mentality which has led to historic tragedies over the years. Events such as the Holocaust,
the Inquisition, and countless wars, can be attributed to uninformed people simply going
along with someone else’s point of view. As Marshall McLuhan said, “A point of view can be
a dangerous luxury when substituted for insight and understanding.”
It should already be evident to you that the true warrior is not one to follow the herd,
whether in action or thought. The warrior thinks for himself and leaves others to do the
same. But simply thinking for yourself is not good enough; you have to develop the ability
to be perceptive and to clearly understand what is happening. Developing insight is
learning to read people and to comprehend their objectives and motivations. This is an
intuitive ability that anyone can learn with practice and awareness.
When I refer to insight being an intuitive ability, I am not referring to anything mystical or
magical. What I am talking about has more to do with being aware and reading between the
lines in order to perceive what is really going on in any given situation or circumstance.
This clear perception is vital, especially knowing how insincere and dishonest people can
be. If you merely trust what people say, or the facade that they present to the public, you
will find that many times you are being deceived.
In his famous letters to his son, Lord Chesterfield wrote, “Mind, not only what people say,
but how they say it.” This is part of developing insight. You have to look at the small signs
which give you clues and insight into the true meaning behind what people say and what
they do. This is something that many people have a problem doing, as it is much easier to
simply believe what someone says instead of digging deeper and really understanding
someone’s meaning.
Lord Chesterfield goes on to say, “The knowledge of mankind is a very useful knowledge for
everybody…You will have to do with all sorts of characters; you should therefore know
them thoroughly, in order to manage them ably.” To do this you have to go beyond mere
surface information. Baltasar Gracian urged us to, “Look beneath. For ordinary things are
far other than they seem…The false is ever the lead in everything, continually dragging
along the fools: the truth brings up the rear, is late, and limps along upon the arm of time.”
Insight is the ability to look beyond the surface of things and to get to the truth. It is being
able to see the true nature of things, whether it is a person’s character or his true
objectives. This is not a mystical process, but rather an art – the art of discernment. It is
being able to perceive and deduce someone’s true intentions. When I teach reading
strategies to students, one of the strategies I teach is how to reach a logical conclusion from
what the author writes.
An author doesn’t spell out every single thing for you in a novel. He expects the reader to be
able to infer certain information and come to a logical conclusion without it being
completely explained or written out word for word. This is part of rational reasoning, and
is basically what insight is. People do not make everything perfectly clear to those around
them, especially if they are trying to hide their true goals or motivations. The wise man has
to read between the lines, using logic and rational thought, to figure out others’ true
intentions.
This may sound a bit paranoid, but it is very important. If you take everything at face value,
you will find that you are being deceived over and over again. The art of discernment is
crucial for the warrior. This is even truer when it comes to life-or-death situations. If you
are targeted by a predator, you have to be able to discern his true intentions, how
dangerous he is, what he really wants, if he is mentally stable, etc. in order to know how to
respond to de-escalate the situation. Without insight into the other person, you are merely
taking a chance with whatever response you take.
It is insight and being able to read a person that gives you the advantage. I call this an art
because that is exactly what it is. There are many books on the market which teach how to
read people’s expressions, body language, speech patterns, eyes, etc. Law enforcement
officers are trained to discern certain things in people that tip them off as to whether or not
someone is telling the truth or lying. I highly recommend that you do a little research on
this subject.
Although, as I said, this is not any kind of mystical, psychic skill, developing accurate insight
into a person’s mind, a specific situation, or a specific subject, is not always a rational skill.
You have to learn to trust your instinct and your intuition. Your intuition can be likened to
your gut feeling. If you have a bad feeling about something, always take that feeling
seriously, even if there is no rational explanation for it.
Blaise Pascal wrote that, “The heart has reasons which reason cannot understand.” This is
very true. Your intuition comes from your spirit, which many people believe is directly
connected to God. Clear perception essentially comes from two sources: your rational
ability to read between the lines and your intuition. These two sources can work together
or they can be completely independent of each other, but they are both important in
developing clear insight.
The sages throughout the ages have always taught that we should listen to our intuition.
Sometimes this is referred to as listening to your heart or listening to your spirit. It doesn’t
matter what label you put on it, you should always listen to the still, quiet voice inside your
mind. Gracian stated, “Trust your heart…for it is never untrue to itself.” Emerson echoed
this sentiment saying, “Trust the instinct to the end, though you can render no reason.”
Antoine de Saint-Exupery agreed stating, “It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
Listening to your intuition and acting according to what your spirit tells you, is not a
natural thing for most people. This is especially true for the warrior, who can be more
comfortable figuring things out rationally than going with his feelings. It is a process that
takes practice and faith. You have to learn to trust your intuition just like you learn to trust
in any of your other skills. As with listening to another person, listening to your intuition
requires that you actually listen. Your intuition is not going to force you to listen. You have
to slow down, quiet your mind, and purposely listen to what your spirit is telling you.
As you have probably figured out by now, the traits of the warrior lifestyle are all
connected in one way or another. Developing insight and listening to your intuition is
greatly aided by meditation. To once again quote Margolis, “Only in quiet waters things
mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.”
When you can’t quite figure things out in your mind, get quiet and meditate on the situation
and allow your spirit to provide you with the insight that you need.
There is an Omaha Maxim which states, “Ask questions of your heart, and you will receive
answers from your heart.” If indeed your spirit is directly connected to God, as many
religions and sages have taught throughout the ages, then your spirit contains all the
information that you need for clear insight into any situation, and it is up to you to be quiet
and listen for the answers you seek. The Sufi mystic, Rumi, wrote, “Moonlight floods the
whole sky from horizon to horizon; how much it can fill your room depends on your
windows.”
The ability to develop insight depends on you. The Zen Buddhist teacher, Dogen, taught,
“Don’t follow the advice of others; rather, learn to listen to the voice within yourself.”
Notice he said that you have to learn to listen. This is a skill and you have to practice it in
order to perfect it. Developing this skill will prove extremely valuable to the warrior in
many ways. It is not simply a useful self-defense skill, but is a skill that you can use in every
part of your life, once you develop it, learn to listen, and trust what you hear.
I will end this chapter with a quote by La Rochefoucauld, “Countless acts that seem
ridiculous have hidden reasons that are exceedingly wise and sound.” It is insight which
provides you with these hidden reasons which are wise and sound. Develop the art of
discernment and see for yourself the value of this internal skill.

Meditations on Insight

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;


what is essential is invisible to the eye.
Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Trust to your heart…for it is never untrue to itself.
Baltasar Gracian
Don’t follow the advice of others; rather,
learn to listen to the voice within yourself.
Dogen
The worst pain a man can suffer:
to have insight into much and power over nothing.
Herodotus
Trust the instinct to the end,
though you can render no reason.
Emerson
He who uses only the sight of his eye is acted on by what he
sees; it is the intuition of the spirit that gives the assurance
of certainty. That the sight of the eyes is not equal to the
intuition of the spirit is a thing long acknowledged.
And yet stupid people rely on what they see.
Chuang Tzu
The heart has reasons which reason cannot understand.
Blaise Pascal
Countless acts that seem ridiculous have
hidden reasons that are exceedingly wise and sound.
La Rochefoucauld
Mind, not only what people say, but how they say it.
Lord Chesterfield
See but do not appear to see; listen but do not appear to
listen; know but do not let it be known that you know.
Han Fei Tzu
Do not be the victim of first impressions.
Baltasar Gracian
He who lacks foresight and underestimates his enemy
will surely be captured by him.
Sun Tzu
It is not difficult to know a thing;
what is difficult is to know how to use what you know.
Han Fei Tzu
A point of view can be a dangerous luxury
when substituted for insight and understanding.
Marshall McLuhan
Insight: what makes the unseen seen,
and the unspoken heard.
Bohdi Sanders

Chapter 23
Self-Reliance
The Warrior’s Independent Spirit
Self-Reliance: reliance on one’s own capabilities, judgment, or resources; independence.
Being self-reliant in today’s world is a tall order. Is anyone truly self-reliant without owning
their own farm or ranch, and being independently wealthy? And even if you do have the
finances to be independently wealthy, you will still need to depend on others to some
extent for your medical needs, supplies, etc. Tiruvalluvar put it clearly, saying, “Those who
live by the plow live in self-sufficiency. All others lean on them to simply subsist.” In short,
very, very few people on this earth are completely self-reliant.
Nonetheless, it is important for the warrior to be as self-reliant as possible. The warrior has
an independent spirit. Without an independent spirit, it would be impossible to live the
warrior lifestyle. Just look at how many of the traits of the warrior lifestyle go against the
flow and are completely different than those of the average person. Only someone with
courage and an independent mind could possibly be successful living life in a way that so
many can’t comprehend.
Self-reliance is basically relying on yourself for your needs instead of relying on other
people. While it is true that everyone in today’s world needs money to survive, or at least
needs money to survive in comfort, you can still strive to be as independent as possible.
Most people depend on others for their income; they have a job and work for someone else.
While there is nothing wrong with that, it certainly puts you in a position where you are
dependent on someone else, at least where your finances are concerned.
Although, as I said, there is nothing inherently wrong with working for someone else, it can
place you in a difficult position at times. Let’s look at an example. Say that your boss is not a
man of character and he asks you to do something for his business that is not ethical. That
puts you in a difficult moral position. On one hand, you need the money to support your
family, but on the other hand, you want to stay true to your code of honor. Refusing to do as
your boss wants could cost you your job, but complying will go against your own personal
beliefs.
This is just one example, but I’m sure you can think of dozens more. There will always be
these kinds of conflicts when you depend on someone else instead of being totally self-
reliant. These kinds of conflicts can put you in the difficult position of having to choose
between making the money that your family needs to survive and living up to your own
principles.
When you work for someone else, the other person has a certain amount of control over
your life. In an instant, he can fire you, disrupt your money supply, and change your life.
This can be very stressful and make it much harder to stay true to the warrior lifestyle. The
stress of such an event, or even the real possibility of such an event, can be enormous and
can disrupt many parts of your life such as your meditation, your training, and your health.
This is just something that the majority of us have to learn to live with and to work around.
Unless you own your own company or business, you have to work for someone else to earn
a living and to take care of your duties and responsibilities. You may be thinking that the
answer is simple – just start your own business. And this is a viable option, but it is not as
simple as it sounds.
Starting your own business is definitely easy; making a good living from your business is a
whole other matter. There are thousands of people who own their own business and who
are not beholding to someone else for their income, or are they? Even if you have your own
business, you are still relying on other people to either purchase your products or your
services. In essence, you are still relying on others for your income; the only difference is
that you are in control of how you do it and the ethical practices of your business.
For example, an author is in the business of writing books or articles. He can decide what
subject he will write on and can write whatever he wants. He has a lot of freedom,
especially if he publishes his work himself. You may think that he is totally self-reliant for
his living, but you would be wrong. Even if he publishes his own work, he will not make a
penny if readers don’t buy his books. He is still dependent on other people for his income.
Are you starting to get the point? It is not easy to be totally self-reliant.
Therefore, self-reliance for the warrior becomes less of an absolute term and more of a
relative term. You will most likely never be totally self-reliant, but you should strive to be
as self-reliant as possible. Being self-reliant is not an all-or-nothing proposition. You can
work to be as independent as possible, although you may not be totally self-reliant. After
all, isn’t this one of the reasons that you are practicing martial arts – to become self-reliant
where your safety is concerned?
What you want to do is to become as independent as possible, in as many areas as you can.
This doesn’t just apply to the physical parts of life, but also to your mind and spirit. The
more you take control over your own life, the more independent you become. For example,
you may have to work for a company to make money, but you can use that money wisely by
saving and investing, and the more that you save, the more financially independent you
become.
This principle works in every area of your life whether it has to do with your health, your
home, or other areas. If you want to be more independent where your health is concerned,
start to learn how to eat healthy, learn about holistic health cures instead of running to the
doctor for every little thing. If you want to be more independent with your home, learn to
do home repairs instead of having to always call a repair man to do the work for you. There
are hundreds of examples concerning becoming more independent. You get the point.
As I stated above, becoming self-reliant doesn’t just relate to finances or the physical
aspects of your life; being self-reliant concerns every single area of your life – physical,
mental and spiritual. Actually, becoming independent in the mental and spiritual areas of
your life is much easier and can be wrapped up in a simple statement: Think for yourself!
If you want to be independent, it is vital that you think for yourself and not let anyone else
do your thinking for you. Don’t let others tell you what you should think, how to think, or
what to believe. There are many physical aspects of self-reliance that you have very little
control over, but you have total control over your mind and your spiritual life. The only
person that can stop you from being independent, where these two areas are concerned, is
yourself.
Don’t be lazy. Think for yourself at all times. Do your homework on whatever topic you may
be mulling over, and think rationally. Your mind is your own, don’t give anyone else control
over what you think or how you think. It doesn’t matter whether or not anyone else
actually likes what you think, or agrees with what you think; it is none of their business.
Taking control over your mind is actually the first step in becoming self-reliant. If you can
discipline yourself to become mentally independent of others, it will be easier for you to
become independent in the other areas of your life.
Max Stimer stated that, “Individually free is he who is responsible to no man.” You are not
responsible to any man, as far as your thoughts and your spiritual life go. Lao Tzu stated
that, “Each individual is responsible for his own evolution.” Your self-reliance is up to you,
starting with becoming mentally independent. Start by making your mind independent, and
then move on to as many areas as you possibly can.
Becoming mentally independent doesn’t mean that you never listen to anyone else. There
are a lot of wise men on this earth. You should listen to their wisdom and learn from them,
but at the same time, you should think about what they say, not just take their words as
gospel. Tolstoy stated, “One should seek the truth himself while profiting by the directions
which have reached us from ancient sages and saints.” This is an excellent way to explain
what I am trying to say. Use what the wise men say, but always think about what is being
said and seek the truth for yourself.
Why should the warrior seek to be self-reliant? The answer lies in two words – freedom
and safety. Being self-reliant gives you more personal freedom to live the way that you
want to live. Epicurus wrote, “The greatest fruit of self-sufficiency is freedom.” The more
self-sufficient you become, the more freedom you have from other people having control
over your life.
It is also a vital part of your overall self-defense. The less self-sufficient you are, the more
you are leaving your life to chance. Francesco Guicciardini wrote, “Remember this:
whoever lives a life of chance will in the end find himself a victim of chance. The right way
is to think, to examine, and to consider every detail carefully, even the most minute.” You
don’t want to leave your life up to chance anymore than you absolutely have to.
Think about ways to make your life more self-sufficient. How can you prepare for a change
in your financial situation? What would you do if you could no longer simply go to the
grocery store to get your food, or if something happened to your water supply? These are
things that everyone should give some thought to in order to be prepared for the
unexpected. Make a list of the ways that you need to be more self-reliant, and then take
steps to increase your independence.
Aesop, “It is thrifty to prepare today for the wants of tomorrow.” There is no guarantee that
life will always be easy; become as self-sufficient and self-reliant as possible. I will end this
chapter with a wise thought from Agnes Macphail, “Do not rely completely on any other
human being…We meet all life’s greatest tests alone.”

Meditations on Self-Reliance

Individually free is he who is responsible to no man.


Max Stirner
Those who live by the plow live in self-sufficiency.
All others lean on them to simply subsist.
Tiruvalluvar
It is thrifty to prepare today for the wants of tomorrow.
Aesop
One should seek the truth himself while
profiting by the directions which have
reached us from ancient sages and saints.
Tolstoy
The greatest fruit of self-sufficiency is freedom.
Epicurus
Remember this: whoever lives a life of chance
will in the end find himself a victim of chance.
The right way is to think, to examine, and to
consider every detail carefully, even the most minute.
Francesco Guicciardini
It never ceases to amaze me:
we all love ourselves more than other people,
but care more about their opinions than our own.
Marcus Aurelius
Trust God, but tie up your camel.
Hadith
You may always be victorious if you will
never enter into any contest where the issue
does not wholly depend upon yourself.
Epitetus
Recognize that if it’s humanly possible,
you can do it too.
Marcus Aurelius
Do not rely completely on any other human being,
however dear. We meet all life’s greatest tests alone.
Agnes Macphail
More satisfying far, that many depend upon you,
than that you depend upon anybody.
Baltasar Gracian
Depend on others and you will go hungry.
Nepalese Proverb
Prepare yourself for you must travel alone.
Book of the Golden Precepts
Each individual is responsible for his own evolution.
Lao Tzu
Do we not realize that self respect comes with self reliance?
Abdul Kalam

Chapter 24
Friendship
The Sacred Brotherhood
Friendship: The mutual feelings of trust and affection, and the behavior that typify
relationships between friends.
In the Phaedrus, written by Plato, Phaedrus stated, “The word friend is common, the fact is
rare.” Although this was composed by Plato around 370 BC, it still holds true today. People
throw the word “friend” around very loosely, but the fact is, true friends are very rare and
the majority of people are very lucky if they have even one friend that they can count on in
good times and in bad times. Thomas Fuller pointed out, “If you have one true friend, you
have more than your share comes to.”
When most people say someone is their friend, it means little more than they have met that
person or that they know that person’s name. True friendship means much more than that
to the warrior. Even the above definition of friendship does not do justice to what it means
to have a warrior as your true friend. Friendship in the warrior lifestyle is more akin to a
sacred brotherhood than a casual acquaintance.
When it comes right down to it, only the superior man truly has real friends. Voltaire stated
this very clearly saying, “The wicked have only accomplices; voluptuaries have companions
in debauch, self-seekers have partners, politicians attract partisans; the generality of idle
men have attachments; princes have courtiers, and virtuous men alone have friends.”
Gracian shared this point of view writing, “There is no true friendship among thieves.”
Socrates also believed this stating, “Friendship exists only between good men, whereas the
bad man never achieves true friendship with either a good or a bad man.”
La Rochefoucauld stated, “What men have called friendship is merely association, respect
for each other’s interests, and exchange of good offices, in fact nothing more than a
business arrangement from which self-love is always out to draw some profit…Rare though
true love may be, true friendship is rarer still.” Not everyone that thinks they have friends
truly have real friends. This is an important point to remember. Benjamin Franklin stated,
“There are three faithful friends – an old wife, an old dog, and ready money.”
It is only those who understand the ideals of true friendship, and what it takes to be a true
friend, which actually have friends who can truly be defined as real friends. All other people
merely have some form of acquaintances that come and go throughout their lifetime. While
there is certainly nothing wrong with having many acquaintances, they are not the same as
true friends. You should have many acquaintances; that is part of living life and doing
business with other people, but make sure you understand the difference between an
acquaintance and a true friend.
The ancient Chinese proverb, “Your acquaintances must fill the empire; your close friends
must be few,” is definitely true. The dictionary defines a friend as, “A person attached to
another by feelings of affection or personal regard; a person who gives assistance; a
supporter.” This definition is more of a way to distinguish between someone who is merely
“friendly” and someone who is your enemy. The true warrior looks at friendship a bit
differently.
The superior man takes the concept of true friendship much more seriously. To him, a true
friend is someone who will stand by you through thick and thin. When the chips are down,
your friend will be there with you. When the wolf is at your door, your friend will be
standing there, right beside you, ready to put his life on the line, side by side with you. A
true friend is someone you can count on no matter what. He is not there merely for the
good times, but rather is always there when you need him. This is the kind of friend the
true warrior is, and this is how he sees true friendship in others.
You may be thinking that this is a tall order, and you would be right. It takes dedication and
effort to be a true friend to someone. Friendship is something that you have to work at; it is
not something that just causally happens overnight. There is an old saying that goes
something like this, you are born with your family, but you choose your friends. Who you
decide to be friends with is entirely up to you, and you should take care regarding with
whom you choose to associate.
Pythagoras taught, “Make him your friend who distinguishes himself by his virtue, and take
example from his virtuous and useful actions.” Confucius agreed, stating “Make friends only
with those gentlemen who are superior men.” Who you decide to be close friends with
matters, and that decision will determine whether you are making a true friend or merely
an acquaintance. You should always judge someone’s character before you decide to
embark on a friendship.
Your choice of friends says a lot about you. Gracian tells us that, “One is known by the
friends he keeps.” John Caspar Lavater goes into even more detail stating, “He is a good
man whose intimate friends are all good, and whose enemies are decidedly bad.” Choosing
to associate with people of low character is a way to guarantee that you will not be
developing a true friendship, at least not with those people. Someone has to have character
and honor to stand by his friends in the bad times, and people of low character do not have
what it takes to be trusted to do this.
It takes time to develop a true friendship and to know for sure that you can trust someone.
Even after years of companionship, you have to be careful about being too trusting. Trust
has to be earned and friendship has to be proven. Until you know for certain that someone
is your tried and true friend, you should be careful how much trust you place in him.
Too many people are fickle and dishonest, this may sound cold and distrustful, but it is also
very true. Don’t be too quick to consider someone your friend. At the same time, once you
have given your friendship to someone, you have given your bond to them. As The Havamal
says, “Be your friend’s true friend.” For this reason, you should be careful and slow about
extending your hand in true friendship. Socrates put it perfectly, “Be slow to fall into
friendship, but when you are in, continue firm and constant.”
Once you have given your hand in friendship, you still have to work to make the friendship
strong and to keep it strong. Like all other parts of the warrior lifestyle, friendship takes
effort and work. You could look at friendship like planting a garden. If you take care of it
and do your part, it will grow and flourish; if you neglect it, weeds will appear and choke
what you worked hard to grow. Planting the seed of friendship is merely the first step, you
have to nurture what you have planted in order for it to fully mature into a real friendship.
Becoming friends with someone is only the first step. You have to continually strengthen
the friendship or it will begin to fade away. Emerson wrote, “Go often to the house of thy
friend, for weeds choke the unused path.” It is also important to remember that simply
because someone is your friend, that doesn’t mean that you neglect your manners and treat
him anyway you want. Friendships are much easier to destroy than they are to build.
If anything, you should treat your true friends better than you do your acquaintances. They
are much more important people in your life than people who you barely know and merely
do business with throughout your life. There is an English proverb that illustrates this point
very well, “An hour will destroy what it took an age to build.” This is very true. Building a
friendship takes a lot of time, patience, effort, and work, but ending a friendship takes very
little effort at all.
Of course, this shouldn’t be the case for the true warrior. When the warrior gives his hand
in friendship, it basically takes a betrayal for him to end the friendship. He is a man of
honor and takes the sacred bond of friendship seriously, and it is hard for him to
comprehend that other people do not have the same dedication to friendship that he has.
This can lead to the warrior being blindsided if he is not very careful in his choice of
friends. History is full of examples that show the treachery of false friends.
This is why Baltasar Gracian taught that you should, “Trust in today’s friends as if they
might be tomorrow’s enemies.” Many years before Gracian’s time, the Vikings wrote this
same admonition, “A man must be watchful and wary as well, and fearful of trusting a
friend.” Not everyone takes the sacred brotherhood of friendship as serious as the warrior
does, so it is wise to be careful when it comes to trusting others.
The wisest path to take is to never trust someone with enough information to hurt you. At
least not unless there is a very good reason to do so, you have known them for years, and
they have proven to be a true friend through the storms of life. Even then it is wise to be
careful concerning what you share. It is always best to keep some things private.
Remember, even Jesus was betrayed by someone he thought was one of his closest friends.
Strive to make sure that your true friends are men of character, honor, and integrity. It is
someone’s character that truly matters when it comes to friendship. Look at what is inside
someone when you are thinking of befriending him. Lieh Tzu put it wonderfully saying,
“Ordinary people are friendly to those who are outwardly similar to them. The wise are
friendly with those who are inwardly similar to them.” Think about this.
I will end this chapter with another quote from La Rochefoucauld, “A true friend is the most
precious of all possessions and the one we take least thought about acquiring.” Take the
sacred brotherhood of friendship seriously and strive to make friends of the highest
quality.

Meditations on Friendship

Make him your friend who distinguishes


himself by his virtue, and take example
from his virtuous and useful actions.
Pythagoras
Go often to the house of thy friend,
for weeds choke the unused path.
Emerson
He is a good man whose intimate friends are all good,
and whose enemies are decidedly bad.
John Caspar Lavater
One is known by the friends he keeps.
Baltasar Gracian
Be never the first to break with your
friend the bond that holds you both.
The Havamal
Be slow to fall into friendship,
but when you are in, continue firm and constant.
Socrates
You do not really know your friends from
your enemies until the ice breaks.
Icelandic Proverb
Reprove your friends in secret, praise them openly.
Syrus
The wicked have only accomplices; voluptuaries have
companions in debauch, self-seekers have partners,
politicians attract partisans; the generality of idle men
have attachments; princes have courtiers,
and virtuous men alone have friends.
Voltaire
Trust in today’s friends as if they
might be tomorrow’s enemies.
Baltasar Gracian
Avoid friends who are detrimental to your peace of mind.
Gongs and Drums of Gampopa Precepts
Many kiss the hand they wish cut off.
George Herbert
There is no true friendship among thieves.
Baltasar Gracian
Beware of befriending an enemy’s friend.
The Havamal
If you have one true friend
you have more than your share comes to.
Thomas Fuller
Make friends only with those
gentlemen who are superior men.
Confucius

Chapter 25
Filial & Family Duty
The Warrior’s Ultimate Responsibility
Filial Duty: duty relating or appropriate to a child’s relationship with, or feelings toward, his
or her parents.
Family: two or more people who share goals and values, have long-term commitments to one
another; all the members of a household.
The young rely on their fathers, the old on their children. The words from this Vietnamese
proverb form the cornerstone of filial and family duty. As a man of honor, you have a duty
to provide for both your immediate family and your parents. This is your ultimate
responsibility on this earth and one which you should take seriously. Taking care of your
family is not something that you should think about in your spare time, when you aren’t
training or working on other traits of the warrior lifestyle, it should come first.
The Apostle Paul wrote, “If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his
immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” Duty to your
family has been taught throughout the ages. Takuan Soho stated, “You must apply yourself
to your work, serve your parents with filial piety, behave with propriety towards your
wife…Furthermore, as a parent, you should conduct yourself with dignity and in
accordance with what is right.”
It is your responsibility as a true warrior to be the head of your family and to do your best
to ensure that each person in your family is provided for according to their needs. You
should also do your best to make sure that your family is at peace and lives in harmony
with each other. This can sometimes be hard to do, but it is very important nonetheless.
Tiruvalluvar taught, “As iron is worn away by frequent filing, a family’s strength is eroded
by incessant inner frictions.”
Maintaining harmony in the family is a balancing act, especially in today’s world with so
many different challenges that have to be addressed in every family. Your duty to your
family is your foremost duty and can be broken down into three categories: your parents,
your spouse, and your children. Of course not every family will have all three of these
categories. There are many nontraditional families, but for our purposes, I will address the
traditional family.
Let’s start with your filial duty, your duty to your parents. The warrior’s duty to his parents
was taken very seriously in the practice of Bushido. There is a Japanese proverb which
states, “Duty to parents is higher than the mountains, deeper than the sea.” This is a pretty
strong statement, and shows how seriously filial duty was taken in Japan. This
responsibility has been taught throughout the world, but seems to be taken much less
seriously in today’s society.
Many people today do not want to be bothered with anyone else, including their own
parents and family. Our society has become a selfish society, full of people who only want
to focus on themselves. Now retirement homes are flourishing in almost every town. It
didn’t used to be that way. Not that long ago, people took care of their own families. They
made sure that their parents had what they needed and could live in comfort.
The fact is that people in today’s society, because of jobs and other factors, do not remain in
one place for their whole life. Families no longer live in the same town or in many cases,
even in the same part of the country. This makes it harder to care for elderly parents, but
this does not excuse you from your filial duty.
Your parents raised you and provided for your needs when you were young. They most
likely helped you get on your feet, even after you were legally considered an adult. That is
what good parents do. Sure, you could probably make a list of things that you feel that your
parents didn’t do a good job with; everyone could make such a list. But the vast majority of
parents did the best that they knew how to do in raising and providing for their children,
and it is the children’s responsibility to take care of their parents in their old age.
Sai Baba stated, “Show parents respect with love and devotion. It is a tribute you should
offer them for the great chance they gave you to come into this world.” You do owe your
parents this duty, whether you think you do or not. It is a part of being a man of honor, and
a good son or daughter. The question then is how do you fulfill this duty? Is it merely
enough to make sure that your parents have a roof over their head and food to eat?
There is a Native American saying that if you merely provide food, water, and shelter for
your parents, you are doing no more than you would do for your dog. If you think about it
this is very true. Most pet owners provide their pet with food, water, and shelter from the
elements. If this is all that you are doing for your elderly parents, are you truly fulfilling
your filial duty? Not according to most cultures, but that seems to be the attitude in many
modern cultures.
Isocrates gave us a very good guide as to how to fulfill your filial duty. He stated, “Conduct
yourself toward your parents as you would have your children conduct themselves toward
you.” Basically, this is the Golden Rule applied to filial duty. Think about how you hope to
be treated by your own children when you are older, and make the effort to treat your
parents that way. Everything on this earth would be better if people simply applied the
Golden Rule to all of their endeavors.
You owe your parents much more than merely providing for their basic survival needs. You
owe them your respect and time. If you aren’t going to take care of their needs, who will?
Think about this, plan ahead, and do your best to provide for all of your parents’ needs in
their latter years. This is not only your duty, but the right thing to do, even for those who
aren’t living the warrior lifestyle.
The second category is your duty to your spouse. There is a Spanish proverb which states,
“He who does not honor his wife dishonors himself.” You chose your spouse and made a
vow to honor and protect her. You gave your word, in front of your family and God, to love
and cherish her, to honor and protect her, till death do you part. Does any of this sound
familiar to you?
You have a sacred duty to honor and protect your wife, and to care of her needs. This is
even a higher duty than your filial duty, although they are both extremely important. Your
spouse should be the most important person in your life, your best friend and lover. She
counts on you to protect her and provide for her. This may sound a bit sexist, but if you
were to do an opinion poll of a cross-section of women, I think that you would find that the
vast majority of women would love to find someone that they could count on to see that
they are protected and well-provided for throughout their life.
Sure there will be those who make comments such as, “I don’t need a man to provide for
me,” and that is true, a woman definitely can make as much money as a man in today’s
society. Women are certainly as intelligent as men and can take care of their own needs,
both financially and otherwise. But scientific polling has shown that what attracts most
women to a man is his ability to provide for them. This is even a bigger attraction than the
man’s looks or body type.
This is not to say that women marry for money; that is not what I am saying at all. I am
merely repeating what the science of human attraction has proven through many different
testing methods. Although women are attracted to powerful men, who can provide for
them, most end up marrying for love rather than for financial security, but they still place
their hopes and dreams on their spouse for support, protection, and financial security. And
you owe your wife all of those things.
In one of the world’s oldest texts, Ptah-Hotep wrote, “If you would be wise, provide for your
house, and love your wife in your arms. Fill her stomach, clothe her back; oil is the remedy
for her limbs. Gladden her heart during your lifetime, for she is an estate profitable to his
lord. Do not be harsh, for gentleness masters her more than strength. Give to her that for
which she sighs and that toward which her eye looks.” This is a pretty good summary of
providing for your wife.
If you will notice, Ptah-Hotep didn’t leave much out. Not only did he say that the wise man
will provide for his wife’s basic needs, but that he makes her happy, he is gentle with her
and gives her the nice things which she desires. He even suggests special pampering such
as oil massages. In short, he is recommending that you treat your wife like a queen, which
of course, his wife was – the queen of Egypt.
While you may not be rich or be the King of Egypt, you can and should still treat your wife
like your queen. There is a Norwegian proverb which states, “In every woman there is a
queen. Speak to the queen, and the queen will answer.” Essentially, if you treat your wife
like she is special, she will feel special and in turn will treat you in the same way. This is the
way that the world works. You reap what you sow. Treat your wife special and she will
treat you special, and this cycle will continue throughout your life together.
The third category of your family duty is that of your duty to your children. Montaigne said,
“A father should make himself worthy of respect by his virtue and abilities, and worthy of
love by his kindness and gentle manners.” And Robert Burton wrote, “Diogenes struck the
father when the son swore.” Making sure that your children are raised correctly and are
given the best chance possible to become men and women of character, is a duty that you
should take extremely seriously. This is also an area where many people are failing in
today’s society. As a teacher, I see this failure firsthand.
There are basically three areas that should be addressed with your children, and they
should be addressed as early as possible in your child’s life. These three areas are:
education, self-esteem, and character training. Of course it goes without saying that you are
expected to provide for your children’s basic needs of clothing, nutrition, shelter, and love.
Bringing another life into this world is a much more serious decision than most people
think. As strange as it sounds, you need a license to raise animals in many states, but any
moron is allowed to have a baby and then to basically do as he will, as far as raising his
child.
There needs to be much more education about the correct way to raise children who will
grow up to be mentally balanced, productive, and men and women of character. Ancient
noblemen took this duty much more seriously than most people do today. For example,
when Alexander the Great was a child, he was tutored by Aristotle. He was taught military
strategies and martial arts. His education was considered of upmost importance.
While it is true that Alexander’s father was the king, and that not everyone can afford to
hire the greatest minds of the time to tutor their children, we can take this attitude towards
education as an example of how important a good education actually should be to you. Our
current educational system is pathetic, and that is putting it lightly. In order to ensure that
your children have a truly good education, you have to do more than simply get them up in
time to catch the school bus.
Take your children’s education seriously. It should not be just about memorizing a few facts
and figures, but rather really understanding the principles behind the subjects that they are
learning. I will not get into all the ways of ensuring that this happens, but you, as a parent,
should make sure that your children understand how important a good education is. Take
whatever steps you have to take to guarantee your children value a true education.
Moreover, you should consider educating your students in more than the normal academic
subjects. I highly recommend teaching your children martial arts, survival techniques,
gardening, and other topics which will enable them to become more self-sufficient adults. If
one of your children shows an interest or special talent in a certain area, foster that in that
child. Remember that God gave these children to you to raise, not to the government. You
are in charge of their education.
In making sure that your children truly value education for the sake of becoming educated,
and not merely because they have to go to school, you will also be building their self-
esteem. Lord Chesterfield warned his son, “Nothing sinks a young man into low company,
both of women and men, so surely as timidity, and diffidence of himself.” A child’s self-
esteem is of utmost importance.
I am not referring to the false, politically correct idea of self-esteem where our society has
decided that it is bad for any kid to lose, so they play sports without keeping score, etc. This
is not fostering self-esteem, but rather merely teaching kids to lie to themselves. What I am
referring to is true self-esteem – a sense of self-worth and self-respect. This is vital in
keeping your children from falling prey to the vices of their peers and other kids who have
not been brought up as they should have been or who have taken the wrong road for one
reason or another.
You should take steps to ensure that your children realize their value. I would even go as
far as to say that you should raise your children like they are princes and princesses, but
without allowing them to become spoiled brats. Raise them to think that they are special,
because indeed they truly are. Part of this process is teaching them the same character
traits that are discussed in Modern Bushido.
I have already discussed the importance of developing a strong character, and it is
important for you to start developing character in your children as early as possible. Leon
Battista Alberti wrote, “The head of the family must first of all be on the watch for the first
sparks of vice to appear among his children’s appetites and must put them out immediately
if he does not wish to be compelled later to extinguish the flames of corrupt desire at
greater cost, with sorrow and tears.”
Teach your children good character traits from their earliest years! Modern Bushido is a
good start, but it only scratches the surface as far as getting into details concerning specific
character traits. Educate yourself on these character traits, incorporate them in your life,
and then teach them to your children as if their lives depend on them.
The true warrior should do his best to protect all of those for which it is in his power to
protect, but his first duty is to his family. Your family should always come first! Also a part
of this duty is taking care of yourself, for how can you possibly take care of anyone else if
you do not take care of yourself? Don’t take unnecessary risks or put your life on the line
when you don’t have to do so. Who will take care of your family if you don’t?
Takuan Soho taught, “You must apply yourself seriously to your work, serve your parents
with filial piety, behave with propriety toward your wife…Furthermore, as a parent you
should conduct yourself with dignity and in accordance with what is right.” This is a good
summary of this chapter.

Meditations on Filial Duty

The young rely on their fathers, the old on their children.


Vietnamese Proverb
You must not expect old heads upon young shoulders.
English Proverb
When you have your own children you will
understand your obligation to your parents.
Japanese Proverb
He who does not honor his wife dishonors himself.
Spanish Proverb
Show parents respect with love and devotion.
It is a tribute you should offer them for the great
chance they gave you to come into this world…
Sai Baba
Duty to parents is higher than
the mountains, deeper than the sea.
Japanese Proverb
Conduct yourself toward your parents as you would
have your children conduct themselves toward you.
Isocrates
He (Cato) never said anything obscene in front of his son,
no more than if he had been in the presence
of the holy Vestal Virgins.
Plutarch
You must apply yourself seriously to your work,
serve your parents with filial piety, behave with
propriety towards your wife…Furthermore,
as a parent you should conduct yourself with
dignity and in accordance with what is right.
Takuan Soho
A father…
He should make himself worthy of respect
by his virtue and abilities, and worthy of
love by his kindness and gentle manners.
Montaigne
Diogenes struck the father when the son swore.
Robert Burton
A torn jacket is soon mended;
but hard words bruise the heart of a child.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
He preaches well that lives well.
Cervantes
As iron is worn away by frequent filing,
a family’s strength is eroded by incessant inner frictions.
Tiruvalluvar

Chapter 26
Balance
The Art of Harmony
Balance: A state of emotional and mental stability in which somebody is calm and able to
make rational decisions and judgments; a state in which various parts form a satisfying and
harmonious whole and nothing is out of proportion or unduly emphasized at the expense of
the rest.
Balance is very important, both to the warrior and to the warrior lifestyle. It is extremely
easy to get caught up in whatever endeavor your mind is currently focused on, and to let
other important things slide. If this happens consistently, your life can quickly become
unbalanced and out of harmony. The key to maintaining a state of emotional and mental
stability is preserving balance in your life.
For the warrior, balance refers to keeping the three main parts of your life balanced and in
harmony – spirit, mind and body. You can think of these three parts of your life as an
equilateral triangle. Each side of this triangle represents one of these parts of your life and
when your life is in balance, each line of this triangle should be the same length. When one
line becomes longer because you are spending too much time on that part of your life or
shorter because you are neglecting a part of your life, the triangle (your life) is no longer
balanced.
It is a constant balancing act to keep these three parts of your life balanced and in harmony.
As the definition above states, you have to work to ensure that nothing is out of proportion
or overly emphasized at the expense of the other parts. Your life can easily get out of
balance when you start something new and are very excited about your new interest.
For example, maybe you have been a martial artist for many years, but have never
addressed the spiritual side of your life. You begin to read and study to develop your
spiritual side, and find it extremely interesting, then you realize that you have basically put
your martial arts training on a shelf and you are spending all of your time reading and
meditating to develop your new found interest. Your spiritual line is getting too long and
your physical line is suffering because of it and your life is beginning to become
unbalanced.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with studying and developing your spiritual side, in fact,
you should be doing this as it is part of the warrior lifestyle. But you shouldn’t spend all of
your time on this one area. Anytime you spend an excessive amount of time concentrating
on one area, it will be at the expense of some other part of your life. The key is not to go
overboard with anything that you are doing. The warrior lifestyle has many areas which
must be addressed, and you shouldn’t sacrifice one area in order to focus on another.
This is what balance is all about – organizing your life in such a way as to be able to develop
every part of your life to the fullest. There are no unimportant traits of the warrior lifestyle.
Hazrat Inayat Khan stated, “The secret of life is balance, and the absence of balance is life’s
destruction.” You must learn to balance all the parts of your life, and while this sounds
relatively easy, it takes quite a bit of discipline.
The Talmud teaches us to, “Be moderate in all things.” Moderation is the key to balance.
Epictetus taught, “If one oversteps the bounds of moderation, the greatest pleasures cease
to please.” Everything in life can be taken to extremes. There is basically no interest, hobby,
or skill on this earth, which someone, somewhere doesn’t take to the extreme. While it is
not wrong to spend time and effort perfecting whatever you do, you must be careful not to
do so at the expense of other important parts of your life.
Taking things to the extreme is the cause of many heartaches and regrets in this life. A good
example of this would be the man who spends all his time focused on his work, at the
expense of his family life. While he may become a gigantic success at work, his family life
suffers for it and he may in fact find that he has sacrificed his marriage and his relationship
with his children in order to spend so much time becoming a success at his job. In essence,
his life is out of balance, and eventually his unbalanced life will cost him dearly.
Epicurus taught us to, “Be moderate in order to taste the joys of life in abundance.”
Moderation means that you intentionally limit yourself, you don’t go to extremes. This
doesn’t mean that you never go all out and put your entire soul into something at times, but
rather that you make sure that you balance these times in your life. W. Somerset Maugham
wrote, “Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the
deadening effect of a habit.” Don’t get into a rut in living your life.
Living your life in the same monotonous way, day after day is not necessarily living a
balanced life. In fact, this is dull and boring, and definitely not living life to the fullest. You
have to balance your daily routine with days that you break from routine and enjoy new
things. Albert Einstein stated, “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must
keep moving.” A dull, repetitive life is as out of balance as a life that is continually
overactive. These are merely two extremes of living life.
The man, who lives his life at the speed of light, never slowing down and taking time to
develop his mind or his spirit, is obviously out of balance. Likewise, the man who lives his
life in a habitual rut, never experiencing any of the things that this world has to offer, is
equally out of balance. The secret of a balanced life lies somewhere in between these two
extremes. It is not hyper-active and it is not semi-comatose.
The man who lives his life in hyper-overdrive is sacrificing spending quiet time alone with
his feelings and meditating. His life is constantly going here and there, almost as if he does
not understand how to slow down or is afraid to be alone with his thoughts and feelings. He
purposely ignores the quiet side of his life and always needs outside stimulation to keep his
mind occupied.
On the other hand, the man who never goes out, who wants to live life more like a Buddhist
monk, hidden away in a cave, is sacrificing the fun and excitement of life. He spends too
much time on the quiet, spiritual and mental side of his life at the expense of experiencing
all that life has to offer. This becomes a habit and it can get to the point that he is almost
anti-social and does not want to be around other people. He is intense about his meditation
time and reading, but has let other parts of his life fall by the wayside.
The famous author, Zig Ziglar, wrote, “I believe that being successful means having a
balance of success stories across the many areas of your life. You can’t truly be considered
successful in your business life if your home life is in shambles.” If you find that you are
failing in one area of your life, while other areas are very successful, the cause may be that
your triangle of life is out of balance. Going back to the example that I gave you before, can
a man who is a great success in his business, but a total failure in his home life, truly be
called a successful man?
A truly successful man is a man who is wise enough to balance all of the aspects of his life.
He doesn’t allow any one area of his life to atrophy while another explodes. Instead he
works to balance spirit, mind and body. You perform at your best when your thoughts,
feelings, and emotions are balanced with your objectives and your principles. This doesn’t
happen automatically; you have to work at it.
It is so easy to get excited about one area of your life, for example your martial arts
training, and let another slip. You may be training so hard in your martial arts that you
neglect your meditation time, because you are excited to get to your training. It takes
discipline to refrain from doing what you are in the mood to do, in order to do what you
know needs to be done. This is where your life becomes a balancing act.
It takes time to develop each part of your life, just as it takes time to develop the traits of
the warrior lifestyle. Neglecting one part of your life in order to spend more time on
another part, is simply shortsighted. Just as your car will not feel quite right going down the
road if you have a tire that is out of balance, your life will not feel quite right if a part of it is
out of balance. For your car to ride smoothly, you must take time to examine each tire and
keep them inflated and balanced. The same principle applies to your life. You must spend
time developing each facet of your life and keep them all balanced.
Thomas Merton wrote, “Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and
rhythm and harmony.” It is hard to truly be happy when your life is not in balance. You will
feel a nagging feeling inside that something is just not right, and that feeling will continue
until you slow down and take the time to put your life back into balance. While there is
nothing wrong with practicing martial arts, meditating, reading and studying, or even
eating pie, excess in any of these areas will cause a problem in another area.
The last point that I want to make about living a balanced life is that I am not saying that
you shouldn’t spend time perfecting certain skills in your life. It is just a fact of life that if
you want to perfect a skill, it takes a lot of time. The secret is being disciplined enough to
spend a lot of time perfecting your interest, while at the same time not neglecting the other
parts of your life.
This is where most people have a problem. They will end up spending so much time
perfecting one area, that they neglect all the other areas of their life. Be the best that you
can be at everything you do, but don’t sacrifice other areas of your life to do so. Learn good
time management.

Meditations on Balance
Be moderate in all things.
The Talmud
Drink nothing to the dregs,
either of the bad, or of the good,
for to moderation in everything
has one sage reduced all wisdom.
Baltasar Gracian
Tis not drinking that is to be blamed, but the excess.
John Seldon
To live long and well, employ moderation.
Chinese Proverb
The secret of life is balance,
and the absence of balance is life’s destruction.
Hazrat Inayat Khan
To learn moderation is the essence
of sound sense and real wisdom.
Jacques Benigne Bossuet
I believe that being successful means having a balance
of success stories across the many areas of your life.
You can’t truly be considered successful in your
business life if your home life is in shambles.
Zig Ziglar
Excess on occasion is exhilarating.
It prevents moderation from acquiring
the deadening effect of a habit.
W. Somerset Maugham
If one oversteps the bounds of moderation,
the greatest pleasures cease to please.
Epictetus
Happiness is not a matter of intensity but
of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.
Thomas Merton
You perform better when your thoughts, feelings,
emotions, goals, and values are in balance.
Brian Tracey
The best and safest thing is to keep a balance in your life,
acknowledge the great powers around us and in us. If you
can do that, and live that way, you are really a wise man.
Euripides
There should be balance in all our actions;
to be either extreme or lukewarm is equally bad.
Hazrat Inayat Khan
Life is like riding a bicycle.
To keep your balance you must keep moving.
Albert Einstein

Chapter 27
Excellence
The Spirit of Kaizen
Excellence: The quality or state of being outstanding and superior.
Living a life of excellence is essentially what the warrior lifestyle is all about. The true
warrior should seek excellence in everything that he does whether it is gardening or his
martial arts. As Ralph Marston wrote, “Excellence is not a skill. It is an attitude.” It is an
attitude, an attitude towards everything you do in life, and it is this attitude which makes
the warrior a superior man.
The Japanese have a term called kaizen which means constant, never-ending improvement.
This is what the warrior should shoot for in every area of his life – constant, never-ending
improvement. No matter how well you have mastered any skill, there is always room for at
least a little more improvement. Booker T. Washington stated, “Excellence is to do a
common thing in an uncommon way.” This is how the true warrior does everything in his
life.
The vast majority of people in this world merely do the minimum. Their attitude seems to
be that good enough is good enough. Good enough is rarely good enough for the warrior; he
seeks perfection and excellence. This doesn’t mean that everything that he does will be
done to perfection, but he will at least try his best to do everything he does to the best of his
ability. He puts his whole heart into whatever he may be working on at the time.
This is something that he requires of himself. Nobody is going to make you live a life of
excellence. Nobody is going to hound you to be the best that you can be in life. This is a
choice that you have to make. Aristotle even stated this saying, “Excellence, then, is a state
concerned with choice.” As the definition states, excellence is the state of being outstanding
and superior. Throughout Modern Bushido, I have referred to the warrior as the superior
man, and this is the reason for that.
The term “superior man” is not a snobbish term that is used to signify that the warrior
considers himself above others and looks down on other people. This is not what is meant
by that term at all. It simply means that the warrior is a man of excellence that does the
best that he can do in every area of his life to integrate excellence into everything that he
does. It is this attitude, combined with the correct action to transform this attitude into
something tangible, which makes the true warrior a superior man – a man of excellence.
The famous football coach, Vince Lombardi, stated, “The quality of a person’s life is in direct
proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.”
This definitely holds true for the warrior. It is his commitment to excellence that
determines the quality of his life. Furthermore, it is his commitment to excellence that
determines whether or not he is truly living the warrior lifestyle as he should be living it.
The warrior lifestyle is not a lifestyle to be lived halfway.
Living the warrior lifestyle halfway is merely pretending to live this lifestyle of excellence.
John W. Gardener stated that, “Excellence is doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.”
This is exactly what the superior man tries to do. Whatever he is doing, he tries to do it in
an extraordinary way. This can apply to anything and everything that you do. Gardener
went on to say, “Whoever I am, or whatever I am doing, some kind of excellence is within
my reach.” This is the true attitude of the superior man.
Excellence is a way of life. I use this quote by Henry Ward Beecher quite often, but it is a
perfect motto for the true man of honor, “Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard
than anyone else expects of you. Never excuse yourself.” If you continually do this, you will
soon find that your life is full of excellence in ways that you may not even realize. Others
will see it and recognize you as a man of excellence, and it will become a part of your
overall reputation, which is a great reputation to have.
Holding yourself to a higher standard is a great way to start being a man of excellence. Like
I stated, living a life of excellence is a choice, nobody else is going to hold you to this
standard; it is totally up to you. You have to be the one that holds yourself to this higher
standard, and this goes for all of the traits that I have discussed in Modern Bushido. Nobody
is going to force you to live the warrior lifestyle. Other people don’t really care how you live
as long as you aren’t disrupting their lives in some way. They really don’t care if you live
like a street bum or a king. How you live your life is totally up to you.
To quote Aristotle again, “Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not
act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have
acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” I
have to agree. Overall, excellence becomes a habit, just like everything else that you
repeatedly do in your life. Each action merely reinforces your dedication to excellence or
your lack of dedication to excellence. As Anne Byrhhe wrote, “Every action we take,
everything we do, is either a victory or defeat in the struggle to become what we want to
be.”
When you decide to do something halfway, that decision in and of itself is akin to taking a
step away from being a man of excellence. On the other hand, every time you slow down
and make the effort to do something the best you can, then you are re-enforcing excellence
in your life. As Aristotle said, excellence becomes a habit. Habits are formed by continually
being consistent at whatever you are doing. The experts tell us that you can form a new
habit in about a month, that is, if you are consistent with your actions.
All it takes is a firm decision to start doing everything you do, the best that you can do it.
Thomas J. Watson wrote, “If you want to achieve excellence, you can get there today. As of
this second, quit doing less-than-excellent work.” This makes sense. If you quit doing “less-
than-excellent work” everything you do will be done at a high level. Essentially, everything
you do will be done at the level of excellence that you are shooting for.
Confucius put it this way, “The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full
potential…are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.” You have to
choose excellence as an act of your will. Living a life of excellence is pretty simple – you
merely choose to do so, and then you do it. The catch is, you then have to discipline yourself
to actually follow through.
Every year, thousands of people make New Year’s resolutions, and at the same time, every
year thousands of people fail to follow through with those resolutions. You can say that you
are going to start living a life of excellence every single day, but it is meaningless if you
don’t back up that decision with your actions and actually start integrating excellence into
your life. Like everything else in life, this takes discipline and effort.
The Greek poet, Hesiod, wrote, “Badness you can get easily, in quantity; the road is smooth,
and it lies close by, but in front of excellence the immortal gods have put sweat, and long
and steep is the way to it.” Making a decision to live a life of excellence, and living a life of
excellence are two different things. Just like writing down your New Year’s resolution and
actually following through with it, are two different things. Like Hesiod wrote, it takes a lot
of work and effort to become a man of excellence.
Excellence has to become the prevailing attitude in your life. It actually does have to
become a habit, and, as with everything else in life, you have to start from where you are.
Start small and continue to build this attitude in your life. You don’t decide to start martial
arts training one day, and enter the ring with experts the next week. It takes time, it takes
work and it takes consistent training. The same principle applies to anything you do in life.
Nobody becomes an expert at anything overnight.
Colin Powell stated, “If you are going to achieve excellence in big things, you develop the
habit in little matters. Excellence is not an exception it is a prevailing attitude.” I discussed
earlier that you have to take control of your thoughts. This is an important part of
developing excellence in your life. Your thoughts are the beginning of your actions;
therefore it is vital that you get your mind straight first. If your mind is not right, you will
never be able to become a man of excellence.
Excellence is not something that you fake in order to build your reputation; it is an attitude
and a way of life. Chung Yung wrote, “The superior man is watchful over himself even when
alone.” This is the attitude of excellence. It doesn’t matter what he is doing or who is
around him at the time, the man of excellence will seek to do everything to the best of his
abilities. He agrees with the quote from Emerson that, “What I must do is all that concerns
me, not what the people think.”
Excellence is the way of the warrior. Each of the essential traits of the warrior lifestyle can
be traced back to living a life of excellence. The normal, everyday, common life is void of the
majority of these traits. The common man lives mainly for his own comfort and gives little
attention to pushing himself to go the “extra mile” in order to live a life of excellence.
Simply put, he is satisfied living an average life.
This is not the way of the warrior. The warrior is not satisfied just going through life, but
rather, he wants to make his life the best it can be. Ordinary is simply not good enough. He
wants to be extraordinary and takes the needed steps to develop his life in just that way.
This is what makes him a superior man. Every man is basically born equal; it is his
decisions that set him apart from others.

Meditations on Excellence

Excellence is an art won by training and habituation.


We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence,
but we rather have those because we have acted rightly.
We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.
Aristotle
Badness you can get easily, in quantity; the road is smooth,
and it lies close by, but in front of excellence the immortal
gods have put sweat, and long and steep is the way to it.
Hesiod
Excellence encourages one about life generally;
it shows the spiritual wealth of the world.
George Eliot
Excellence is a better teacher than mediocrity.
The lessons of the ordinary are everywhere.
Truly profound and original insights are to
be found only in studying the exemplary.
Warren G. Bennis
If you are going to achieve excellence in big
things, you develop the habit in little matters.
Excellence is not an exception, it is a prevailing attitude.
Colin Powell
Whoever I am, or whatever I am doing,
some kind of excellence is within my reach.
John W. Gardner
Excellence is doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.
John W. Gardner
Excellence is not a skill. It is an attitude.
Ralph Marston
Excellence is the gradual result
of always striving to do better.
Pat Riley
Excellence is to do a common thing in an uncommon way.
Booker T. Washington
Ordinary is simply not good enough.
Be extraordinary!
Bohdi Sanders
Excellence, then, is a state concerned with choice…
Aristotle
If you want to achieve excellence, you can get there today.
As of this second, quit doing less-than-excellent work.
Thomas J. Watson
The quality of a person’s life is in direct proportion
to their commitment to excellence,
regardless of their chosen field of endeavor.
Vince Lombardi

Chapter 28
Loyalty
The Warrior’s Dedication
Loyalty: The feeling of devotion, duty, or attachment to somebody or something; the quality or
state of being loyal.
Loyalty is a very admirable trait, and one which is very hard to find in people today. The
average person today is self-centered and selfish. He tends to focus on only what he wants
or what is best and easiest, for himself in the present moment. The slogan, “Sworn to Fun –
Loyal to None,” describes him perfectly. The true warrior looks at things quite a bit
differently, especially where loyalty is concerned.
The warrior is fiercely loyal to his word, his duty, and to his friends and family. He has an
unwavering sense of dedication to the important things and people in his life. Euripides
stated that, “One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.” This is definitely true of the
warrior. Once you have gained his friendship, his loyalty is a part of the package, and the
friendship and loyalty of a true warrior is priceless. He will not turn his back on you or
forsake you. He is loyal to the end.
Loyalty has always been an integral part of the warrior’s character. The Samurai were so
loyal to their Daimyo (feudal lord), that they would actually commit seppuku (ritual
suicide) if their Daimyo commanded them to do so. This is total loyalty. In the same way,
the medieval knights were expected to be completely loyal to their lord and their religion.
Loyalty has always been a part of the warrior’s code of honor. To turn your back on
someone that you have given your friendship and loyalty to, is nothing more than an act of
dishonor.
Of course, in today’s society, the warrior is not required to be totally loyal to some Daimyo
or lord. This is a good thing since it is so rare to actually find leaders of honor and
character. This is not to say that Daimyos and lords weren’t less than honorable - many
were. The fact that many of these men were less than honorable speaks to how highly
warriors esteemed loyalty. They remained loyal to their lord, even when the lord did not
deserve their loyalty.
This fact once again reinforces the warrior’s dedication to his own standards. Once the
warrior swore his loyalty to his Daimyo or his lord, he kept his word, no matter how the
other party behaved. He did not let the lord’s lack of character cause him to break his word
of honor. They took their oath seriously.
True warriors today are not bound by an oath to give their loyalty to anyone; it is given as a
part of their code of honor. There are no laws which require you to be loyal to your friends
or your family. Ada Velez-Boardley stated, “Loyalty is the pledge of truth to oneself and
others.” You and you alone, make a firm decision to be loyal. Sometimes it is hard to
maintain your loyalty to those in your life, especially when they do not deserve your
loyalty. But it is exactly at times like those, when they do not deserve your friendship, that
your loyalty is tested. It is when people are acting like total jerks or when they make
mistakes, that they most need your loyal friendship.
As I mentioned in a previous chapter, the warrior doesn’t change his character because
someone does or does not deserve his support. He lives his life by his own standards,
despite the actions of others. Being loyal to someone does not mean that you always agree
with his actions or that you even like him all the time. What it means is that you have made
a firm decision and have given him your friendship and loyalty. Once you have done that,
you should live up to your word.
This in no way means that you can never withdraw your loyalty from someone. You can
give your friendship to someone, but if they utterly reject your friendship and your
attempts to support them, you are not required to continue to support them. This is not the
same as being disloyal. In this case, it is the other person’s decision to end the friendship,
not yours. The true warrior is the best friend that someone could possibly have, but if his
friendship is rejected, he is released from any duty that he had to be a loyal friend.
While the warrior would never turn his back on a friend or be disloyal to a friend, he is
certainly not required to put up with being treated in a disrespectful manner or to continue
to extend the hand of friendship to someone who has made it clear that he doesn’t want his
friendship. This is totally different from the warrior being a disloyal friend. In this case his
friendship is being thrown away by the other person and he no longer has any duty to be
loyal or supportive to this person.
On the other hand, the opposite of this scenario should never happen. The superior man
will never turn his back on his friend and end the friendship out of some unwarranted,
selfish reasons. Once the warrior has entered into the sacred bond of true friendship, he
will honor that friendship, as far as it depends on him. It is for this reason that the warrior
should be carefully selective when it comes to forming true friendships, instead of mere
acquaintances.
When you have decided to give your hand in friendship, you should remain loyal to your
friend, even when your friend is in the wrong. This doesn’t mean that you have to join him
in his misguided actions or support everything that he does. Never lower your standards
just to go along with something that someone else is doing, whether he is your friend or
not. Being supportive and loyal doesn’t mean you support everything that your friend does;
it simply means that you support your friend. This is an important distinction.
Let’s look at an example. Say your friend is having a very hard time financially and has
made the very bad decision to sell illegal drugs in order to get enough money to pay his
bills and keep his house. Of course you shouldn’t support his decision, but this doesn’t
mean that you throw in the towel on the friendship. If this is a true friendship, you should
support your friend by trying to counsel him about the error of his ways. You should try to
stop him from making a possible life-changing mistake because of utter frustration over his
finances.
This is in no way supporting his decision to sell drugs, rather it is you being a good friend
and trying your best to support him through the bad time that he is going through. Whether
or not he listens to you or takes your advice is not up to you; whether or not you remain a
loyal, supportive friend is. See the difference? To quote Charles Dickens, “She was truest to
them in the season of trial, as all the quietly loyal and good will always be.”
Another analogy would be to look at the loyalty that a good dog has to his owner. If you
have a good dog and have raised it from the time it was a puppy, trained it well, spent time
with it, loved it, and made it a part of your life, it will certainly be loyal to you. Your devoted
friend will love you and most likely even put his life on the line for you, depending on the
breed. But even the most loyal dog will not follow his owner in certain acts of desperation.
For example, let’s say that for some reason you became severely depressed and decided
that you would commit suicide by hiking to the top of a cliff and jumping off. Your loyal
companion would certainly hike up the mountain with you, giving you love and support all
the way, and sensing something is wrong, he would probably give you even more of his
attention throughout the hike. But when it comes down to you actually jumping off the cliff,
he will not follow you off the edge. He would do what he could to alert someone to your
death or to get someone to help, but he would not join you in your misguided action.
This is the same type of loyalty and support the true warrior should give to those in his life.
He doesn’t turn his back on them simply because they are wrong or misguided. Instead he
does all that he can to help them and support them, but if they persist in destroying their
life, he will not destroy his life as well.
This same principle applies to the first example where your friend has decided to sell
drugs. You should support him the best you can, and not turn your back on him, but at the
same time, you cannot join him in his desperate actions. There is a big difference between
loving and supporting your friend, and allowing your friend to drag you down. I use this
quote by Gracian often, and it bears repeating here, “The man of principle never forgets
what he is, because of what others are.”
There is a quote by Sir Francis Osborne that fits perfectly with this discussion, “In seeking
to save another, beware of drowning yourself.” Remain a loyal friend, but understand that
all you can do is the best that you can do. You control your actions, but you can’t always
control the outcome. Be loyal and do what you can to help, but in the end you must realize
that everyone has to make his own decisions. You can’t control everything, no matter how
much you would like to.
I have one last comment on my example about the friend who decides to sell drugs. You
may be thinking that anyone who would sell drugs doesn’t deserve your support and that
you would be justified to immediately end this friendship. This is how most people would
view this situation, but as with so many things, the true warrior looks at things a bit
differently. Remember, deserve has nothing to do with it.
When you have given your hand in friendship, your duty requires you to exhaust every
option before giving up. While others may see your friendship with this person as
condoning his actions, you know better. Takuan Soho stated, “Each action of the warrior is
performed from a place of fundamental wisdom…it is completely different from the
ordinary behavior of a fool. Even if it looks the same, it is different on the inside.”
Your loyalty to friends and family should have no limit, although it may be expressed in
ways that others cannot understand. Don’t worry how others view you; just act according
to what you know is right where your loyalty is concerned.

Meditations on Loyalty

You don’t earn loyalty in a day.


You earn loyalty day-by-day.
Jeffrey Gitomer
She was truest to them in the season of trial,
as all the quietly loyal and good will always be.
Charles Dickens.
Though bitter, good medicine cures illness.
Though it may hurt, loyal criticism
will have beneficial effects.
Sima Qian
One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.
Euripides
Within the hearts of men, loyalty and consideration
are esteemed greater than success.
Bryant H. McGill
Confidentiality is a virtue of the loyal,
as loyalty is the virtue of faithfulness.
Edwin Louis Cole
If having a soul means being able to
feel love and loyalty and gratitude,
then animals are better off than a lot of humans.
James Herriot
You’ve got to give loyalty down,
if you want loyalty up.
Donald T. Regan
Loyalty and devotion lead to bravery.
Morihei Ueshiba
Your loyalty to friends and family should have no limit,
although it may be expressed in ways
that others cannot understand.
Bohdi Sanders
Loyalty to the country always.
Loyalty to the government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain
No more duty can be urged upon those
who are entering the great theater of life
than simple loyalty to their best convictions.
Edwin Hubbel Chapin
No one but yourself knows
whether you are cowardly and cruel,
or loyal and devout; others do not see you;
they surmise you by uncertain conjectures;
they perceive not so much your nature as your art.
Michel de Montaigne

Chapter 29
Total Self-Defense
The Warrior’s Invincibility
Total Self-Defense: The use of reasonable force, mental intelligence, and other means, to
defend yourself, your family, or your property against any tangible harm, whether physical,
financial, or otherwise.
There is much more to self-defense than being able to defend yourself against a physical
assault. Although self-defense has become synonymous with martial arts, in reality it
encompasses many other aspects besides a physical attack. The true warrior is concerned
with keeping himself and his family completely safe and secure, not just perfecting his
martial arts skills.
As a warrior, you have a duty to protect your family, period. Your duty is not merely to
protect your family from physical attacks, but from any danger which might threaten them.
In today’s world the threat of a physical assault is a very real, valid threat, but it isn’t the
only danger lurking in the shadows. In fact, defending yourself from a physical assault, even
if you are proficient in your martial arts skills, carries with it hidden dangers that you may
not have considered.
You have to be very careful when it comes to using your martial arts to defend yourself.
Don’t get me wrong, when your life is on the line you do whatever it takes to protect
yourself and your family. That is a given. But what you must keep in mind is your overall
objective, which is to protect yourself and your family. There is a right way and a wrong
way to do everything, including defending yourself.
We live in a different world than we did 20 or 30 years ago. Today’s society is plagued by
political correctness and a lack of common sense. Every prison houses men and women
who are there simply because they defended themselves against a predator’s attack. While
they may have successfully defended themselves against the predator that attacked them,
they failed to protect themselves from our over-reaching, corrupt legal system.
Self-defense means self-defense, period. It leaves nothing out. Today, you not only have to
defend yourself against predators and criminals, but you also have to defend yourself
against the police, the government and the legal system. In the long run, our inept and
corrupt legal system has done more damage to many people’s lives than physical assaults,
which were short of death, could have possibly done. This fact is sad but true. Self-defense
today is much trickier than at any time in the history of our world.
The wise warrior will understand this fact and incorporate it into his self-defense training.
Han Fei Tzu wrote, “As circumstances change, the ways of dealing with them alter too.”
Well, I’ve got news for you, in case you haven’t noticed, circumstances have changed. It’s a
different world. We live in a society where employees can foil an armed robbery, possibly
saving their lives, and the lives of others around them, and still be reprimanded and fired
for their actions. We live in a society where an armed criminal can break into your home to
rob and kill you, and if you shoot him and paralyze him, he can sue you for protecting
yourself.
These facts clearly signify that our world has changed. The mental patients are now in
charge of the asylum. There is an ancient Indian proverb which states, “If you live in the
river you should make friends with the crocodile.” You must understand all of the possible
dangers that you could face in today’s world, not merely the ones that you learn about in
your martial arts class.
When you train for self-defense today, you have to consider dangers such as corrupt police,
court costs, law suits, and even going to jail,. These are all very real dangers for you and
your family. Our legal system is no longer a system which weighs what is just. It has
become a monstrous bureaucracy which is all about making money. True justice is a thing
of the past. If you get hauled into court, your life is on the line and it is a crap shoot. Even if
you are in the right and are acquitted, it will still cost you thousands of dollars in lawyer
fees to defend yourself.
The wise warrior needs to consider these things. Do some research on how our system
really works. Learn what the police and courts looks for that indicates that you acted in
self-defense and that your actions were justified. Research, not only how criminals and
predators think, but also how the police think and how their system works. What you find
will be scary and will make you think differently about self-defense.
There are several enlightening books on the market which give you insight into how to
successfully deal with the police. I can tell you straight up that you shouldn’t trust the
police to protect you or your rights; don’t place your safety or the safety of your family in
anyone’s hands but your own. Understand that most people don’t care about you.
It is up to you to make sure that you and your family are safe – in every way. This is what
total self-defense is all about. The word “total” leaves nothing out. Self-defense shouldn’t
simply focus only on one type of threat. If there are several kinds of danger lurking in your
path and you only train to address one of those kinds of danger, are you truly prepared to
protect yourself or your family? Think about that. You have to know your rights and how
the system works.
Our system of government is corrupt and it has been for many, many years, but it is getting
worse. It is easy for the warrior to focus on martial arts, meditation, and physical fitness.
These are things that he finds interesting, fun, and exciting to practice and explore. But
your duty extends much further than martial arts training. You have to consider many
other factors when it comes to keeping your family safe, and some of these will not be as
exciting, interesting or fun as studying martial arts.
Politicians and government bureaucrats can turn your life into a nightmare and utterly
destroy you as easily as some thug in a back alley. A criminal is a criminal; they merely
differ in their approach. Total self-defense has to incorporate a vast array of knowledge.
You need to educate yourself concerning the financial world as well as the criminal justice
system. The IRS can turn your family upside down with a simple audit, even if you have
tried your best to conform to their laws and regulations.
By now you should be starting to understand that there is much more involved in keeping
your family safe, than simply knowing how to fight and defend yourself physically, and
even in the physical arena there are many other aspects to consider. One important part of
total self-defense, as far as your physical/mental skills are concerned, is learning de-
escalation techniques. This is a vital part of total self-defense, especially if there are
witnesses around you at the time of the conflict. Let’s looks at an example.
If you are in a bar and some ruffian decides to target you, you shouldn’t just use him for a
punching bag to teach him a lesson. This could cause you a lot of trouble. What you want to
do is to do everything in your power to de-escalate the situation, while making sure that
the many witnesses in the bar can clearly see that you don’t want to fight, and are trying
your best to settle things peaceably. You do this with your dialog, your gestures, the tone of
your voice, etc. And you should do this sincerely; you should truly not want to fight if you
can avoid it.
You do this for two reasons. First, you do it because it is the right thing to do. You never
want to hurt someone if you can avoid it. Second, you are covering your butt. If things do
come to blows, you will have a room full of witnesses that will testify that you didn’t want
to fight and that you tried your best to walk away peaceably, but were forced to defend
yourself. As Baltasar Gracian stated, “Let cold deliberation take the place of sudden
outburst.”
Of course you don’t always have the chance to de-escalate things. If someone walks up and
tries to take a cheap shot at you, for whatever reason, you have to react immediately. I am
not talking about a situation like that. That is a totally different kind of situation. But, if you
have a chance to de-escalate things, do so. Don’t let your pride or emotions cause you more
problems. Think rationally and remember your objective, which is to keep yourself and
your family safe.
Self-defense is not about pride or proving how tough you are. It is about one thing and one
thing only, keeping yourself and your family safe – in every way. If you want to prove how
tough you are, enter some full-contact fighting contest. Don’t try to prove how tough you
are in a situation that may cost you and your family financially, emotionally, and physically.
Putting some idiot in his place may feel good temporarily, but that good feeling will soon
turn to regret if it costs you thousands of dollars and several years in prison.
I am just skimming the surface, concerning this topic. There are many, many other topics
where the issue of total self-defense should be considered by the wise man. Things such as
your choice of friends, drinking too much in public, drug use, home protection, speaking
your mind in the workplace, etc. all can jeopardize, in one way or another, the overall safety
of you and your family, and should be taken into consideration as part of your overall self-
defense.
Another aspect of total self-defense is that of being prepared for emergencies. You should
have emergency plans for your family in case of natural disasters such as fires, floods,
tornadoes, etc. In addition, you should also be prepared for the consequences of other
kinds of disasters that could disrupt your food supply, your access to clean water, the
power to your home, or fuel for your vehicles. These are all things that most people take for
granted, but these are all very real threats.
There are many books out there which give you a lot of information on the many different
aspects of survival, and I highly recommend that you find a good one and do some research
on the subject. You don’t wait until you are assaulted to start thinking about your martial
arts skills, and you shouldn’t wait until your house is on fire to think about what steps to
take to get your family out safely. Take the time to prepare in advance. Total self-defense
incorporates all of this plus martial arts training as well.
Martial arts training is definitely a part of the warrior lifestyle and, in my opinion, should
be a part of everybody’s life in today’s society. Everyone needs to know, at least some basic
self-defense strategies and techniques. There are a lot of really bad people in this world,
and it is a part of preparedness to know how these people think and how to keep yourself
safe from the many predators that roam our streets and neighborhoods.
Many people wrongfully see martial arts as teaching violence or all about fighting. This is
not the case. Depending on the style and the instructor, martial arts teach much of what I
discuss in Modern Bushido. But, like I said, it depends on the instructor and the style. It can
be difficult to find a martial arts dojo that teaches both character training and actual, useful
self-defense techniques in the same class, or in some cases, at all.
There are many kinds of martial arts and each have their own techniques, philosophy, and
overall views of what martial arts should be. Some are merely interested in sports or
tournament applications, and others only focus on mixed martial arts competitions. Others
are mainly teaching an ancient art form. While each of these have their place, and there is
nothing inherently wrong with any of them, in my opinion, the true warrior should focus
his attention on a martial art which teaches real-life applications – true, usable self-defense.
What I mean by usable self-defense is a martial art that teaches you techniques and
strategies that will keep you safe on the street. Learning a martial art for the sake of
learning an art is fine. These martial arts teach the art of ancient weapons, katas, and pre-
prescribed techniques. This is very interesting and fun to learn, but a lot of what is taught
in these type classes is not really useful on the streets for personal self-defense.
For example, how many people are going to be walking the streets carrying a sword or a
naginata? Learning such things is mainly for entertainment, tournaments, or just plain fun.
For actual self-defense applications I believe that the true warrior needs to concentrate
more on realistic martial arts training. This kind of training teaches real-life applications
and prepares the student for what he is most likely to run into in today’s world.
Realistic self-defense classes are more interested in teaching techniques which truly work,
as opposed to teaching traditional techniques. Don’t get me wrong, I am definitely not
saying that traditional techniques don’t work. My black belt is in Shotokan, a traditional
style of karate. What I am suggesting is that it is fine to learn traditional martial arts styles,
but you will want to spend some time training in some modern, realistic martial arts as
well.
No matter what style of martial arts you decide is best for you, you will want to make sure
that it addresses three major areas: self-defense techniques, de-escalation techniques, and
mental preparedness. Of course a good martial arts instructor is going to teach you much
more than just these three skill sets, but you want to make sure that you find someone who
is, at a minimum, an expert in these three. Let’s look at each of these three areas of self-
defense.
First, it should go without saying that any martial arts training should teach you good self-
defense techniques. These include things such as punches, kicks, joint locks, pressure
points, and using different weapons, just to name a few. These techniques should be
uncomplicated and easy to learn. For realistic self-defense, you don’t need to know how to
do some jumping, spinning roundhouse kick. If someone tries to sell you on using
something like that for self-defense, he does not know what he is talking about and you
should find a different instructor.
When it comes to personal self-defense, you want to learn simple, useable techniques, not
fancy Hollywood stunts. Also, learning to use traditional weapons is of little use, as far as
self-defense applications are concerned. It is much more useful for you to learn how to use
modern weapons such as firearms and knives. The one exception to this rule is learning
how to fight with a staff. There are many times when you could have access to a makeshift
staff in today’s world, so knowing how to use anything from a bo staff to a hanbo would be
useful training, and classified under “good to know.”
In addition, a good self-defense class will include lessons on the anatomy of the human
body. The more you know about the human body and how it is designed, the better able
you are to understand how to take it apart. You need to know how the different joints
work, where pressure points are located, which areas to attack and which not to, and which
spots are dangerous and could kill someone. This is all a part of learning about the physical
aspect of self-defense.
The second area that any good martial arts instructor should teach you is de-escalation
techniques. I touched on de-escalation techniques earlier in this chapter, but it is an
important subject, so I will expand on it more here. De-escalation techniques basically
teach the student how to put out a fire before it starts. The applications of these techniques
are many, but they aren’t taught in many dojos today.
Too many martial arts instructors only teach students how to kick and punch, basically,
how to fight. This is shortsighted instruction. Sun Tzu wrote, “To subdue an enemy without
fighting is the greatest of skills.” This is what de-escalation techniques are all about –
winning without fighting. If your instructor does not teach de-escalation techniques, and
give you ample time to practice these techniques in real-life scenario training, you should
either find a new instructor or get some independent training. Yes, it is this important!
A vital part of de-escalation training is understanding how predators think and how their
minds work. My book, Wicked Wisdom: Explorations into the Dark Side, is a good source for
this information. It delves into how criminals and predators think, and also gives you a lot
of information about de-escalation techniques. If you understand how these people think, it
is much easier to understand how to deal with them. Like George Washington said, “To be
prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace.”
The last area of any good martial arts instruction is mental preparedness. This area is
closely related to learning de-escalation techniques. In fact, they can be seen as
overlapping. Mental preparedness is a major part of realistic martial arts training. You can
know every technique perfectly, but if your mind panics when someone attacks you, your
techniques are almost worthless. This is where mental preparedness comes into play. You
have to learn how to control your mind in high-stress, high-adrenaline situations.
It is one thing to spar with a friendly partner, in a safe and controlled setting, but it is
another thing altogether when you are assaulted by a muscle-bound thug who truly wants
to hurt you. You have to learn how to remain calm and rational in these kinds of situations.
Realistic martial art training teaches you this skill.
Learning how to successfully defend your family should not be seen as an option to the
warrior – it is one of your main duties. It is for this reason that I think it is much more
important to learn modern, realistic martial arts techniques, than to study traditional arts. I
also think that every warrior should learn to not only use modern weapons, but to become
proficient in their use during self-defense situations.
Again, I am not against learning traditional martial arts styles. If you are interested in
traditional martial arts, by all means take classes and learn what you are interested in
learning. All I am trying to get across to you is that if you do decide to learn traditional
martial arts, you should supplement that training with some realistic training as well. In
fact, the more you learn, the better off you will be, as far as your own personal self-defense
is concerned. You can never have too much knowledge.
There is a Native American saying which states, “The hunter can make many mistakes, the
hunted, only one.” Predators are the hunters. They can makes many mistakes and still live
to try again, unless one of their mistakes lands them in jail or dead. You, on the other hand,
are the hunted. You can’t afford to make a mistake if you are attacked by one of these
predators. Being unprepared or untrained could mean death for you, if your path crosses
paths with a dangerous predator.
It is for this reason that you should take your martial arts training and your overall total
self-defense skills, seriously. You should look at your martial arts training as a matter of life
or death, not simply as another fun activity that you participate in two or three times a
week. You have to be as prepared as possible for whatever the winds of life blow your way.
Good, realistic, martial art training is a huge part of being prepared.
This chapter is just a very quick summary on the subject of total self-defense. There are
many books dedicated to this subject and I would highly recommend that you do some
research on each of the various aspects of total self-defense preparedness. It is always
better to be over prepared for the unexpected, than it is to find yourself facing a bad
situation which you are not prepared to handle.
Total self-defense means that you are capable of defending yourself against whatever may
threaten your life, or your way of life. This topic encompasses a wide variety of situations,
far too many to be covered in this short chapter. It will serve you well to prepare yourself
as well as you possibly can for the possible dangers that you could face. Remember the
ancient saying, “Only a warrior chooses pacifism; others are condemned to it.” Give yourself
the choice.

Meditations on Total Self-Defense

What is of supreme importance in war


is to attack the enemy’s strategy.
Sun Tzu
What folly is it to play a game in which you
can lose incomparably more than you can win.
Francesco Guicciardini
He who lacks foresight and underestimates
his enemy will surely be captured by him.
Sun Tzu
You have everything to gain
from managing your affairs secretly.
Francesco Guicciardini
Let cold deliberation take the place of sudden outburst.
Baltasar Gracian
Silence is the safest policy if you are unsure of yourself.
La Rochefoucauld
If a battle cannot be won, do not fight it.
Sun Tzu
Don’t spit in the well: you’ll be thirsty by and by.
Russian Proverb
As circumstances change,
the ways of dealing with them alter too.
Han Fei Tzu
Every man counts as an enemy,
but not every man as a friend.
Very few can do us good, but nearly all, harm.
Baltasar Gracian
Men are so false, so insidious, so deceitful and
cunning in their wiles, so avid in their own interest,
and so oblivious to other’s interest, that you cannot
go wrong if you believe little and trust less.
Francesco Guicciardini
If you live in the river you should
make friends with the crocodile.
Indian Proverb
Prepare yourself in good fortune for the bad.
Baltasar Gracian
It is the foolish sheep that makes the wolf its confessor.
Italian Proverb
If you have doubts about someone,
your true and best security consists in having things
so arranged that he cannot hurt you even if he wants to.
Francesco Guicciardini
Embrace the snake and it will bite you.
Bulgarian Proverb
In seeking to save another, beware of drowning yourself.
Sir Francis Osborne
Never get angry except on purpose.
Japanese Maxim

More Meditations on Total Self-Defense

Strength is defeated by strategy.


Philippine Proverb
To subdue an enemy without
fighting is the greatest of skills.
Sun Tzu
You must be deadly serious in training.
Gichin Funakoshi
Avoiding danger is not cowardice.
Philippine Proverb
To be prepared for war is one of the
most effective means of preserving peace.
George Washington
He does not guard himself well
who is not always on his guard.
French Proverb
The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond
the possibility of defeat, and then waited for
an opportunity of defeating the enemy.
Sun Tzu
It is usually the reply that causes the fight.
Japanese Proverb
Victory is not gained through idleness.
German Proverb
Rely not on the likelihood of the enemy’s not coming,
but on our own readiness to receive him;
not on the chance of his not attacking, but rather
on the fact that we have made our position unassailable.
Sun Tzu
Make yourself a sheep, and the wolf is ready.
Russian Proverb
The hunter can make many mistakes,
the hunted, only one.
Native American Maxim
In peace do not forget war.
Japanese Proverb
Tomorrow’s battle is won during today’s practice.
Samurai Maxim
Even in the sheath the knife must be sharp.
Finnish Proverb
Invincibility depends on one’s self;
the enemy’s vulnerability on him.
Sun Tzu

Chapter 30
Acceptance
Living in the Shadow of Death
Acceptance: The realization of a fact or truth and the process of coming to terms with it
Robert Louis Stevenson wrote, “Old and young, we are all on our last cruise.” Warriors
must accept the fact that at some point, they are going to die. The Samurai reflected on
their death daily. This practice helped keep them focused on the things in their life which
really mattered and served to remind them that every day is a special gift to be lived to the
fullest. As Dhaggi Ramanashi wrote, and was quoted in the great warrior epic, Braveheart,
“Everybody who lives dies. But not everybody who dies has lived.”
Marcus Aurelius expressed this same thought stating, “It is not death that a man should
fear, he should fear never beginning to live.” And Dag Hammarskjold echoed this sentiment
stating, “Do not seek death. Death will find you. But seek the road which makes death a
fulfillment.” This is an excellent quote for the warrior – seek the road which makes death a
fulfillment. This actually sums up the warrior lifestyle, for it is the road which makes death
a fulfillment.
Everyone should live life to the fullest and strive to get as much out of each and every day
as humanly possible. Nobody knows when death will suddenly appear at his door, so it is
short-sided and foolish not to live each day to the fullest. This doesn’t just mean being as
active as possible in order to get as much done as you possibly can before you die. As I said
before, you have to balance the three parts of your life – the spiritual, the mental, and the
physical.
Nobody knows how much time they have to live on this earth. Even if you weren’t trying to
live a life of excellence, this fact alone should be enough to cause you to keep your affairs in
order and live life to the fullest. The reason so many people don’t live their life this way is
because they refuse to think about the uncertainty of life. For many, it is a depressing
thought. It wouldn’t be that way if they would spend some time reflecting on their
spirituality.
Without being clear about your spiritual beliefs or giving any thought to spiritual things at
all, death is definitely a scary, depressing thought. You can only be at peace with the fact
that your time is limited if you spend some time meditating on your spirituality and come
to peace with your beliefs concerning God and your relationship with God. Once you have
reached this point and know what you believe and why, you will find that you are more at
peace with the subject of death and living your life to the fullest here and now.
Warriors of old spent time reflecting on their spiritual beliefs because they never knew
when doing their duty would result in their death. Modern warriors should follow their
lead and make sure that they are at peace in their spiritual life. Part of being prepared is
being prepared for the possibility of death. Charles Simmons wrote, “Every person ought
daily to reflect upon the uncertainty of life, and the consequences of sudden death.” This is
true. The Samurai knew this, the sages knew this, and you should know this too.
Thinking of the consequences of death doesn’t have to be a morbid, depressing process.
Rather than thinking about how terrible or sad it will be, think about it from the viewpoint
of life is short, so you must make every moment count. Use the fact that time goes by fast
and your time on this earth will be over faster than you can imagine, to motivate yourself to
live your life to the fullest. Spend time with your friends and family. Make sure you keep
your affairs in order. Live your life, don’t just eat, sleep and work.
The sands in your hour glass will flow at the same rate whether you live life to the fullest or
just go through the motions. Sai Baba illustrated this very well in the following analogy,
“When you are intent upon a journey, after you purchase your ticket and board the train –
whether you sit quietly, lie down, read or meditate, the train will take you to the
destination. So, too, at birth each living thing has received a ticket to the event of death and
is now on the journey.”
The sand in your hour glass is like the train in this analogy. It will continue to flow, at the
same rate, towards the time of your death no matter what you do during that time. The
sands of time are not affected by how you spend your time. It doesn’t matter if you sleep,
workout, work to improve yourself, live with a positive outlook, or waste your life in a drug
induced fog, your time continues to flow (that is, unless you do something like throw your
hour glass off the top of a building and bring about your own death).
It is up to you to decide how you will live your life. You decide how your limited time on
this earth will be spent. Don’t fear death or waste your time putting off living until
sometime in the future – live your life now! Distich Moralia stated, “Give up fearing death;
it’s at all times foolish to miss life’s pleasures for fear of death.” If you are putting off
enjoying your life in the present, and instead you are thinking that you will start enjoying
your life after you accomplish this or after you make enough money, etc., you are making a
big mistake.
This kind of thinking is a trap. There will always be another reason to put off living and
enjoying your life in the present – no money, a big project, etc. This list could go on and on.
You must live while you are living. You can still take care of all the menial things that we all
have in our lives, while at the same time, living your life to the fullest. Living is living. You
don’t have to compartmentalize your life. It is okay to enjoy your life and take time to smell
the roses, even while you are struggling to make your way in this world.
Shinso stated, “No matter what road I travel, I am going home.” Don’t take everything so
seriously that it subtracts from your enjoyment of living your life. Although you can’t
control the sands of time, you do control how you live your life while those grains of sand
are flowing through the hour glass. Accepting the fact that the days of your life are
numbered shouldn’t take away from your excitement or enjoyment of life; this is not why
the warrior meditates on his death.
Meditating on death is merely a way to keep you focused on living life to the fullest. If you
think about the fact that you do not have all the time in the world and that you are getting
older every day, you will be more motivated to live your life now, instead of putting off
living until later. If there are things that you want to do during your lifetime, do them now.
Don’t put off living until sometime in the future.
The other benefit is that when you understand that there are no guarantees concerning
how long you have to live on this earth, you will be motivated to make every moment count
with your friends and family. This uncertainty should motivate you to keep your affairs in
order so your family is provided for in the event of your unexpected death.
This is exactly why the Samurai spent time daily contemplating their death. They knew that
their life was especially uncertain because of the customs of their lifestyle. They could be
commanded to commit suicide at any time by their Lord, and they would obey, no
questions asked. In addition, there was also the very real chance of having to fight to the
death for self-defense or in a duel. They had to keep their affairs in order and be prepared
for death at any moment.
You, on the other hand, are not beholding to anyone who may command you to commit
suicide, but your life is no more guaranteed than that of the Samurai of old. In fact, your life
is just as uncertain. You never know when you will be in a fatal car wreck, some freak
accident, or caught up in some act of terrorism. It is just as important for you to have your
affairs in order and to be prepared to meet your Maker as it was for the Samurai warriors.
Like Cicero said, “No man can be ignorant that he must die, nor be sure that he may not this
very day.”
Even a long life, is short. Before you know it you will wake up and see new lines on your
face and your body will start to feel old, and you will think that just yesterday you were
young. The years definitely go by fast. Time is very deceptive in this way. Juvenal stated,
“The short bloom of our brief and narrow life flies fast away. While we are calling for
flowers and wine and women, old age is upon us.” Homer echoed this sentiment stating,
“Men flourish only for a moment.”
However, reflecting on how short your life may be is no excuse for living recklessly or
irresponsibly. This is a mistake that some people make when they start to meditate on how
short life actually is. They mistake living life to the fullest, for living life selfishly and
recklessly. Bias tells us that, “We should live life as though our life would be both long and
short.”
You aren’t on this earth to simply exist, but rather to live, and live well. After all, you aren’t
alive if you aren’t living. Your life is going to be what you make it. As Christian Furchtegott
Gellert wrote, “Live as you will wish to have lived when you are dying.” Live your life with
no regrets. Of course everyone is going to have some regrets, but you should do your best
to live so that you don’t regret having wasted your allotted time during this life.
Kok Yim Ci Yuen said, “The greatest gratification is embodied in the knowledge on one’s
deathbed that one has no regrets from his or her life, and that one has spent one’s days
with a sincere and harmonious attitude.” Accepting your mortality doesn’t mean moping
around waiting for death to take you away; it means understanding that life is a gift and
that you must use that gift before it is too late. I will end this chapter with a quote from
Cervantes, it is actually Don Quixote’s Creed, and a good philosophy of life, “Take a deep
breath of life and consider how it should be lived.”

Meditations on Acceptance

Old and young, we are all on our last cruise.


Robert Louis Stevenson
When you are intent upon a journey, after you purchase
your ticket and board the train – whether you sit quietly,
lie down, read or meditate, the train will take you to the
destination. So, too, at birth each living thing has received
a ticket to the event of death and is now on the journey.
Sai Baba
Take a deep breath of life and
consider how it should be lived.
Don Quixote’s Creed
None dies except in appearance. In fact what is called birth
is the passage from essence to substance, and what is called
death is on the contrary the passage from substance to
essence. Nothing is born and nothing dies in reality,
but all first appears and then becomes invisible.
Apollonius of Tyana
So live your life that the fear of death
can never enter your heart.
Tecumseh
The proper function of man is to live, not to exist.
I will not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
Jack London
Do you not know that disease and death must overtake us,
no matter what we are doing?…What do you wish to be
doing when it overtakes you?…If you have anything better to
be doing when you are so overtaken, get to work on that.
Epictetus
It is not death that a man should fear,
he should fear never beginning to live.
Marcus Aurelius
Live as you will wish to have lived when you are dying.
Christian Furchtegott Gellert
We should live as though our life
would be both long and short.
Bias
Do not seek death. Death will find you.
But seek the road which makes death a fulfillment.
Dag Hammarskjold
Every person ought daily to reflect
upon the uncertainty of life, and
the consequences of sudden death.
Charles Simmons
Everybody who lives dies.
But not everybody who dies has lived.
Dhaggi Ramanashi

Chapter 31
The Fool
The Antithesis of the Warrior
Fool: Somebody considered lacking a good sense of judgment; an unintelligent person; a
ridiculous person.
I have devoted quite a bit of time discussing the traits of the true warrior, but sometimes it
is helpful to our understanding to see the opposite side of the coin – the traits of the fool.
The actions of the fool are usually the opposite of those of the true warrior. Someone who
is a fool is considered to be somebody who lacks good sense or good judgment. He lacks the
character traits of the superior man, and he embraces many traits which the warrior strives
to eliminate from his life.
The foolish man doesn’t quite comprehend the law of karma. The law of karma is the total
effect of a person’s actions and conduct during his life. Karma is basically the law of
reciprocity. This means that whatever you do comes back to you in one form or another.
The unwise man doesn’t understand this, and thus wonders why he continually has bad
luck throughout his lifetime.
He fosters the internal enemies – feelings of anger, hate, revenge, greed, jealousy, malice,
and prejudice, without ever stopping to think about whether his way of life is right or
wrong. The concept of right and wrong can never become fully established in his life
because it is constantly being overshadowed by selfish thoughts of comfort, desires and
profit. Justice takes a back seat to his own comfort or selfish desires. The book of Proverbs
puts it well, stating, “Like snow in summer or rain in harvest, honor is not fitting for a fool.”
Although this type of man doesn’t deserve true honor, he often plays the role of the
charlatan, claiming honors and titles for himself which he doesn’t deserve. John Crowne
does a good job of telling us why this is so, stating, “A fool, indeed, has great need of a title;
it teaches men to call him count or duke, and thus forget his proper name of fool.” How
often do we see this in today’s world! Just think of the corrupt, unethical politician who is
always called the “Honorable Mr. Jones.” Honorable indeed! Sakya Pandit taught, “Though a
wicked man appears good in his conduct, it is but hypocrisy.” How well this applies to many
of our politicians and leaders!
Every human being feels emotions such as anger or hate at one time or another, but the
foolish man harbors these feelings and nourishes them, until they many times manifest in
inappropriate and low actions. Fools are rash and allow their emotions to guide their
actions, never stopping to consider that their emotions are irrational or that their actions
will have lasting consequences for them down the road. Baltasar Gracian wrote, “Fools
always rush in, for all fools are rash.” Rash actions are rarely wise, rational decisions. The
foolish man never stops to consider this fact, as rational thought is a foreign concept to him
the majority of the time.
Although his thoughts and actions are many times shameful, his pride is without limits.
Alexander Pope wrote, “Pride is the never-failing vice of fools, and this point has proven to
be true throughout the ages.” No matter how undeserving of honor or honors, the fool’s
pride never wavers. He thinks of himself way more highly than he should, while at the same
time looking at the true man of honor with contempt.
The idea of emulating the wise man, or the warrior lifestyle, never crosses his mind, with
the exception of doing so for some ulterior, dishonorable purpose. He is not interested in
truly being a man of honor, but rather in appearing to be a man of honor in order to
increase his profits or position. To him, this is what passes as wisdom. The concept of
holding himself to a higher standard because of his principles is sheer lunacy in his eyes.
He cannot perceive the benefit of holding himself to a higher standard if it doesn’t increase
his bottom line in some way. He sees the true man of honor as the fool because he simply
doesn’t have the capacity to understand the true meaning of honor. William Blake wrote, “A
fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees.” How true this is!
There is a Chinese proverb that states, “Summer insects are not equipped to talk about ice;
a frog in a well is not equipped to discuss the ocean.” In the same way, the fool cannot
comprehend the warrior lifestyle. He has no concept of the many traits discussed in Modern
Bushido; they are simply foreign concepts to him. Confucius made this point perfectly
saying, “The superior man stands in awe of the words of the sages. The inferior man does
not stand in awe of them; he is disrespectful to important people; he mocks the words of
the sages.”
He mocks the very teachings that would help him transform his life. There is very little
wisdom found in him at all, yet he talks as if he is the most intelligent man on the planet.
This inferior man revels in hearing his own opinions and always has to interject his two
cents worth into every conversation. Benjamin Franklin stated, “Half wits talk much but say
little,” thus describing the foolish man perfectly.
Plato taught us that, “Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools because they
have to say something.” The sages throughout the ages have echoed this very sentiment
about the inferior man. The book of Proverbs states, “A fool finds no pleasure in
understanding but delights in airing his own opinions.” And Chuang Tzu taught, “Fools
regard themselves as already awake.” They think they are smarter than other people.
You will find that many of the fool’s opinions are generalizations, and as William Blake
stated, “To generalize is to be an idiot.” It is by his own words that the fool reveals himself.
Aesop taught us that, “Clothes may disguise a fool, but his words will give him away.” Aesop
went on to say, “The smaller the mind the greater the conceit.” As you can clearly see, the
inferior man doesn’t give much thought to his words, he merely spouts whatever thoughts
cross his mind, and they reveal him to be what he really is – a fool.
The Bhagavad Gita teaches us that, “Hypocrisy, arrogance, vanity, anger, harshness,
ignorance; these characterize a man with foolish traits.” These are obviously all traits
which are completely opposite of the noble traits that the true warrior strives to develop in
his life. The foolish man embraces these traits with the same vigor and passion as the
warrior embraces the character traits discussed in Modern Bushido.
The Buddhist monk Bodhidharma stated, “Good and bad are distinct. Cause and effect are
clear…But fools do not believe and fall straight into a hell of endless darkness without even
knowing it…They are like blind people who do not believe there is such a thing as light.
Even if you explain it to them, they still do not believe, because they are blind.” It is
basically impossible to explain the warrior lifestyle to the inferior man; he simply can’t
understand why anyone would live in such a way.
Nagarjuna stated, “Counsel given to fools excites but does not pacify. He who pours milk for
a snake is only increasing its venom.” Even if you do try to teach the way of the warrior to
the fool, he will not change his lifestyle. Oh, he may get all excited about what you say and
act as if he is going to change his life, but he rarely changes his true colors.
There is an ancient Irish proverb which states, “Don’t give cherries to a pig; don’t give
advice to a fool.” The reason for this is that it is a waste of your wisdom; fools rarely will act
on good advice, choosing instead to go their own way, no matter how misguided that may
be. It is best to hope that the fool learns from his own mistakes, although this too is rarely
the case. As the Dayak proverb states, “No amount of rosewater can give a crow white
feathers.”
This outlook towards the fool is universally found throughout the world. In Japan they say,
“There is no medicine to cure a fool.” In China, the saying is, “Rotten wood cannot be
carved.” No matter how you put it, the meaning is the same: fools will not listen to sound
advice.
Dr. Frank Crane wrote, “Every generation a new crop of fools comes on. They think they can
beat the orderly universe. They conceive themselves to be above the eternal laws. They
snatch good from Nature’s store, and run…And one by one they all come back to Nature’s
counter, and pay – pay in tears, in agony, in despair; pay as fools before them have
paid…Nature keeps books pitilessly. Your credit with her is good, but she collects; there is
no land you can flee to and escape her bailiffs…She never forgets; she sees to it that you pay
her every cent you owe, with interest.”
This is a sad, but true commentary on the foolish man. He has all the same wisdom
available to him as other men, but ignores it, choosing instead to go his own misguided
way. He perceives himself to be different than all of those who went before him, and pays
no heed to the wisdom of the elders. This man is not capable of learning from the past, but
instead only has the capability to learn by making his own mistakes, many of which are
permanent.
These men are hotheaded and reckless. To teach the fool the martial arts, is to create a
dangerous menace to society, as he uses what he knows only for his own personal gain,
without regard to anyone else. The masters knew this fact and refused to teach martial arts
to men of low character, but things are different in today’s society. Today, everything
appears to revolve around money.
As you can plainly see, the fool is indeed the antithesis of the warrior. The warrior lifestyle
is something that he could never fully comprehend. It is a way of life that he could never
live. Strive to live as a wise man and leave the characteristics of the fool behind and be a
man of true honor and integrity.

Meditations on the Antithesis of the Warrior

And the burnt fool’s bandaged finger


goes wobbling back to the fire.
Rudyard Kipling
It is the peculiar quality of a fool
to perceive the faults of others and to forget his own.
Cicero
The superior man stands in awe of the words of the sages.
The inferior man does not stand in awe of them:
he is disrespectful to important people;
he mocks the words of the sages.
Confucius
Stupidity always goes to extremes.
Baltasar Gracian
A fool sees not the same tree that a wise man sees.
William Blake
Whatever benefit one may give,
the wicked man is never grateful.
Nagarjuna
Fools have been and always will be the majority of mankind.
Denis Diderot
Any man can make mistakes,
but only an idiot persists in his error.
Cicero
Wise men talk because they have something to say;
fools because they have to say something.
Plato
Those who do not study are simply cattle in clothing.
Chinese Proverb
The recipe for perpetual ignorance is:
be satisfied with your opinions and
content with your knowledge.
Elbert Hubbard
To generalize is to be an idiot.
William Blake
Outside noisy, inside empty.
Chinese Proverb
The foolish person seeks happiness in the distance.
James Oppenheim
A fool will soon use up his money.
Japanese Proverb
A wise man guides his own course of action;
the fool follows another’s direction.
Sakya Pandit

Conclusion

I hope that you have found this book to be a useful aid in your quest to live a life of
excellence. In order for the character traits discussed in Modern Bushido to be useful in
your life, you will have to make them a real part of your life. It does no good to merely read
about these traits, mentally agree that you should integrate them into your daily life, and
then forget about them. You have to internalize the traits for them to make any difference
in your life.
As the Dhammapada states, It is you who must make the effort; the sages can only teach.” I
am not saying that I am a sage in any sense of the word, but you have been given a lot of
information from many different sages in this book. Now it is up to you to decide whether
or not you want to take the teachings of these sages and make them a part of your life or
whether you want to continue with your life as is. Only you can make this decision. Buddha
taught, “No matter how many good words you read and speak of, what good will they do
you if you do not put them into practice and use them?” Think about this.
Put the information that you have read in this book to use in your life. Put it to the test and
see if it isn’t a better way to live. Nobility is an attitude not a birthright. You decide whether
or not you will live a noble life. You decide whether or not you will live the warrior lifestyle.
You, and you alone, decide whether or not you will live a life of honor and will be a true
warrior.
“One must make the warrior walk his everyday walk.”
Miyamoto Musashi
Live With Honor ~
Bohdi Sanders, PhD
Other Titles by Bohdi Sanders

Character! Honor! Integrity! Are these traits that guide your life and actions? Warrior
Wisdom: Ageless Wisdom for the Modern Warrior focuses on how to live your life with
character, honor and integrity. This book is highly acclaimed, has won multiple awards and
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The Heart and Soul of Bushido is the second book in the Warrior Wisdom Series.
Wisdom, life-changing quotes, and entertaining, practical commentaries fill every page.
This series has been recognized by four martial arts hall of fame organizations for its
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The Warrior Lifestyle is the last installment of the award winning Warrior Wisdom
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Wisdom of the Elders is a unique, one-of-a-kind quote book. This book is filled with quotes
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Looking for More Wisdom?


If you are interested in living the warrior lifestyle or simply in living a life of character,
integrity and honor you will enjoy The Wisdom Warrior website and newsletter. The
Wisdom Warrior website contains dozens of articles, useful links, and news for those
seeking to live the warrior lifestyle.
The newsletter is also a valuable resource. Each edition of The Wisdom Warrior Newsletter
is packed with motivating quotes, articles, and information which everyone will find useful
in their journey to perfect their character and live the life which they were meant to live.
The Wisdom Warrior Newsletter is a newsletter sent directly to your email account and is
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Martial Arts Honors
for Dr. Sanders’ Books

Dr. Sanders’ books have been honored by the follow organizations for their significant
contributions to the world of martial arts:

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