NLP & Coaching
NLP & Coaching
I draw here those parallels in a succinct way more to highlight than to explain in detail
with the expectation to arouse in the mind of the reader curiosity to know more on NLP.
I liberally use here words of John Whitemore from the book ‘Coaching for
performance’.
The sentences in italics in blue font are quoted from John Whitmore’s book.
NLP also clearly says to focus on the outcome and not sit content with what happened.
NLP is outcome oriented. NLP is more interested in what one‟s wants to happen than
analyzing more on what happened. NLP is futuristic.
2. The Coachee does acquire the facts, not from the coach but from within
himself, stimulated by the coach
One of the beliefs of excellence of NLP is „People already have all the resources they need
or can create one‟.
The role of NLP is to facilitate the subject or client to bring out their best. NLP strongly
believes that people are endowed with „positives‟ and that if they don‟t remember to
employ in a context, NLP helps to identify and implement. Thus the role of NLP is more
like a catalyst.
So NLP helps the client to figure our solution for her problem than instructing a solution.
Though NLP is outcome- oriented it does not dictate or decide the outcome of the client.
NLP strongly believes that client consciously or non-consciously knows what is best for
him.
NLP acknowledges the „map of reality‟ of the client. Map of reality is current
understanding of the client. Then NLP asks appropriate questions to understand the goal
of the client. Thereafter NLP employs suitable and appropriate intervention to help the
client reach their goal.
4. The expressions ‘to get the best out of someone’ and ‘your hidden
potential’ imply that more lies within the person waiting to be released.
Unless the manager or coach believes that people possess more capability
than they are currently expressing, he will not be able to help them express
it. He (Coach) must think of his people in terms of their potential, not their
performance
We must see people in terms of their future potential, not their past
performance.
The following 3 beliefs of excellence of NLP will vindicate that NLP considers people as
potentially complete and whole.
These 3 beliefs of NLP presuppose that people are endowed with the capability to give their
best and in their intention they want to give their best. If at all they don‟t perform to the
expected level, it is their strategy that has disappointed them and not their capability to
perform. NLP intervenes appropriately to bring out the potential into action and get the
result the client wants.
The endeavor of every NLP intervention is to first put the client in a resourceful state,
meaning „can do‟ state of mind.
A resourceful state of mind is a positive state of mind which thinks of possibilities and
tends to move towards solution than dwelling on difficulties and simply analyzing on
problems and difficulties.
6. For coaching to work at its best the relationship between the coach and the
coachee must be one of partnership in the endeavor, of trust, of safety and of
minimal pressure. Coach –Coachee relationship is non-threatening and supportive
Rapport is one of the six pillars of NLP. To be in rapport within and without is important
for effectiveness.
Before NLP intervention with the client, NLP points to two check points –
Establishing rapport is a prerequisite for client intervention for rapport marks the quality
of interaction.
Rapport facilitates smooth interaction.
With rapport the client will feel relaxed and so in a non-threatening situation the client will
freely express.
The purpose of NLP is to increase awareness, to be aware of what is going on in you and
around you.
According to NLP the moment you are aware your organism takes care of it and that
awareness cures.
For clean & open sensory channel NLP has sensory acuity exercise to sharpen awareness.
This sharpening of senses exercise gives „here & now attention‟ that drastically increases
attention density.
7 No two human minds are or bodies same. How can I tell you how to use
yours to their best? Only you can discover how with your awareness
NLP says we are unique. No two humans are exactly same. According NLP each must find
his own road to freedom.
NLP does not believe in fixing clients. NLP does not brand or bracket clients. Each and
every event must be understood in the context of its happening. Each person must be
approached with a fresh eye.
NLP says „We must acknowledge and respect the model of the clients‟ world”
We are not the standard to measure someone. The client must be understood or evaluated
with their frame of reference and parameters they hold.
Our potential is realized by optimizing our own individuality and uniqueness, never by
molding them to another‟s opinion of what constitutes best practice.
It is interesting to note that NLP emphasizes greatly on self-responsibility for change and
growth.
For change to happen, that too lasting change to happen, two important factors are –
„I take responsibility for my outcome and I surrender to the process of change‟.
Being responsible is a key factor for NLP intervention. Unless the client is ready to own the
„problem‟ or „need‟ and unless the client chooses what she wants, NLP cannot in any way
impose anything to bring the change.
NLP talks of „Well –Formed Outcome‟ where the client is allowed space to define goal and
design the way to achieve it taking full responsibility for the benefit and consequence of
goal achievement.
According to NLP ‘REALITY’ is a mental construct of the client taken to be true. It is true
for the client in his „map of the world‟
We must respect an individual‟s map as being true for them without colouring it with our
conclusions .
Being detached (non-judgmental) is important to help the client figure out solution or to
achieve goal.
REALITY QUESTIONS
The questions need to demand high resolution of focus to obtain the detail of
high quality input.
The reality answers sought should be descriptive , non-judgmental, to
ensure honesty and accuracy
The answers must be of sufficient quality and frequency to provide the
coach with a feedback loop.
CLEAN QUESTIONS of NLP are questions that open the descriptive channels of answers.
Clean questions allow the client to express in their terms and as they perceive it and not as
the client what you want to hear.
Clean questions open the channel for unreserved expression.
In NLP UPTIME is where your awareness is outside, aware and not inside.
Uptime is when you are fully tuned to outside, around you, when you are alive and alert to
everything happening around you in a non-judgmental way.
The coach does not need to know the whole history of the situation but
merely to be certain that the coachee is clear about it
NLP does not work with the content but only with the process.
When a client approaches with a problem, NLP does not sit to hear the full history from
beginning to end. The drama of the event may sometimes distort the whole purpose and
process of intervention.
So NLP will ask the subject or client where they are now and where they want to go.
NLP works more with process and outcome, than the history of the problem.
The purpose of options stage is not to find the right answer but to create and
list as many alternatives courses of action as possible.
One of the beliefs of excellence of NLP is “The person who is most flexible gains control
over the situation”
The person with flexibility finds choices for reaching the goal easily and effectively
optimizing the resources on hand.
NLP has tools to tap the creative thinking process of the brain to think in new ways .
NLP‟s specialty is programming the brain for specific action in that NLP is an excellent
tool available to help coachee achieve goal not by WILL but by an even more powerful
mind tool called IMAGINATION.
Imagination works wonders and creative imagination is very conducive for achieving goals.
Conclusion:
Coaching & NLP have a lot in common in helping people perform at their peak level.
Coaching as a process for performance effectiveness can choose to use NLP tools for
efficacy and ease of intervention.
NLP fully acknowledges that people are the greatest resource and whatever is humanly
possible is achievable by appropriate ways and means.