Parental Acceptance

PREDICTORS OF PARENTAL ACCEPTANCE 1
INTRODUCTION
Background of the Study
The experience of coming out is regarded as an indispensable component in the identity formation
of sexual minority homosexuals (Cass, 1979, 1996; Rivers, 2002). This process of identity development
entails disclosure of sexual orientation to external social relationships, either towards family and/or peers.
Zooming in to the context of parent-child relationship, same-sex attracted youth considered disclosing
to parents as “one of the most difficult developmental milestones for homosexual youth” (Savin-Williams,
2001). Added to that existing internal pressure, is the fact that acknowledgment of heterosexual
orientation remains stigmatized in the Filipino setting for example, where a high level of religiosity is
evident on such occasions. Thus, disclosure especially to parents is ruled by anxiety and hesitations and
contains in a provoking experience (Rosario, Rotheram-Borus, & Reid, 1996; Savin-Williams, 2001). This
idea presents a need to understand parental acceptance along with the process of parental adjustment
especially when maternal or paternal reactions upon disclosure and knowing influences the general well-
being of the youth and how they seek for their sexual identity.
Gender identity in a more theoretical view in terms of parent’s reactions in the process of getting
to understand the sexual orientation of their children upon disclosure provides few models to explain the
underlying reasons with how acceptance is regarded in the initial response of parents; clarity of the
pattern of this context until the current time remains unclear, specifically on the area of family interaction
and climate that exists within the family. This will get a hold as well of what happens within dynamics of
the family upon knowing and disclosure of child’s homosexuality. There are a couple of studies done on
the experience of the homosexuals but none so far on how parents cope with this change and in the long
run reach acceptance specifically in the Philippine setting. The existing literature rely mostly on Western
and studies from other countries and do not have an account in the Philippines setting where
homosexuality also is a matter concentrated that speaks on stigmatization who continuously strive for
empowerment. There is the insufficiency that needs to be filled in, knowing the existence of homosexuals
is not enough to understand the relationships this has brought upon on how this affects their parents. A
discrepancy of culture from the West can earn a different result which is what this study wants to discern
through the given factors regarded. There is a scarcity of systematic research that investigates its
predictive factors, too. All these things being put together, this study wants to aid on this insufficiency
and aims to understand the parental acceptance and the adjustment process in a more comprehensive
scope of considering a range of factors in the light of using family-related approach along with personal
factors.
Review of Related Literature
Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity and Expression
A person’s gender is often confused with their sexual preference or sexual orientation, so it is
important to have a clear-cut distinction. Gender refers to the attitudes, feelings, and behaviors that a
given culture associates with a person’s biological sex. Gender-normative is the behavior that is
compatible with cultural expectations while behaviors that are viewed as incompatible with these cultural
expectations are gender non-conformity (APA, 2012). Gender identity refers to one’s sense of oneself
identification as male, female, or someone else (APA, 2011) while gender expression refers to an
individual’s presentation of oneself including physical appearance, clothing choice, and accessories, as
well as behavior that communicates aspects of gender role. Gender expression may or may not conform
to a person’s gender identity (APA, 2008). Transgender is an umbrella term used to describe differences
in gender identity wherein it does not conform to what is typically associated with the sex assigned at
birth. Sexual orientation refers to one’s enduring sexual and romantic attraction to members of one’s own
sex such as gay or lesbian, attraction to members of the other sex such as heterosexual, and attraction to
members of both sexes such as bisexual. Diane Ehrensaft (2011) makes the distinction as gender is who
we go to bed as, sexual identity concerns whom we go to bed with (p. 209). Heterosexuality, homosexuality
and bisexuality are all regarded as “sexual orientations” (Samelius and Wagberg, 2005).
Parental Acceptance
The most commonly used theory on studying parental acceptance towards homosexual children
is the Parental Acceptance-Rejection Theory. It is an “evidence-based theory of socialization and lifespan
development that attempts to predict and explain major causes, consequences, and other correlates of
interpersonal-especially parental- acceptance and rejection” (Rohner, Khaleque, and Cournoyer, 2012).
In PARQ Theory, together, parental acceptance and rejection form the warmth dimension of
parenting with parental acceptance at the positive end of the continuum and parental rejection at the
negative end (D’Amico & Julien, 2012). The warmth dimension has to do with the quality of the affectional
bond between parents and their children, and with the physical, verbal and symbolic behaviors parents
use to express these feelings. Parental acceptance refers to the love, affection, care, comfort, support,
nurturance and other such behaviors that parents can feel or express toward their children. According to
Maccoby & Martin (1983), parental warmth has long been considered one primary dimension or
continuum of parenting behavior. Parental warmth is defined as verbal and non-verbal behaviors that
reflect overall acceptance, including expressions of affection, support, positive affect and positive
involvement regarding a child (Rohner, Khaleque, & Cournoyer, 2012). When parents act on their feelings
of love they are likely to be affectionate. Parental affection can be shown physically through hugging,
kissing, caressing, and comforting, verbally through praising, complimenting, and saying nice things to or
about the child, or symbolically in some other way, as with the use of culturally specific gestures (Rohner
et al., 2012).
On the other hand, parental rejection refers to the absence of withdrawal of warmth, love, support
or affection by parents toward their children (Rohner, et al., 2012). Parental rejection can be shown
anywhere in the world by any combination of four principal expressions: (1) cold and unaffectionate, the
opposite of being warm and affectionate, (2) hostile and aggressive, (3) indifferent and neglecting, and (4)
undifferentiated rejecting. Undifferentiated rejection refers to individuals' beliefs that their parents do not
really care about them or love them, even though there might not be clear behavioral indicators that the
parents are neglecting, unaffectionate, or aggressive toward them.

Hostility as one principal expression of parental rejection happens when parents act on this
feeling which results in a behavior generally called aggression. As understood in PARQ Theory, aggression
is any behavior where there is the intention of hurting someone, something, or oneself either physically or
emotionally (Rohner et al., 2005). Rohner et al. (2005) added that parents may be physically aggressive
such as hitting, pushing, throwing things, and pinching, as well as verbally aggressive like being sarcastic,
cursing, mocking, shouting, saying thoughtless, humiliating, or disparaging things to or about the child.
Additionally, parents may use hurtful, nonverbal symbolic gestures toward their children.
Moreover, neglect as another expression of parental rejection is not simply a matter of failing to
provide for the material and physical needs of children, it also pertains to parents' failure to attend
appropriately to children's social and emotional needs (Rohner et al., 2012). Often, for example, neglecting
parents pay little attention to children's needs for comfort, solace, help, or attention. They may also remain
physically as well as psychologically unresponsive or even unavailable or inaccessible.
Epkins and Harper (2016) acknowledged another considered dimension of parenting behavior
besides acceptance and rejection, parental control (Skinner et al., 2005). In this dimension, one end
reflects permissiveness or lax control and the other end reflects strictness which is defined as what
parents do to manage, regulate, or control their children’s behavior, such as providing and setting
expectations with appropriate limit setting, restrictions, and discipline (Rohner & Khaleque, 2005).
Behaviorally controlling parents restrict children’s behavior according to Drake and Ginsburg (2012).
However, it is important to note that the way parents manage, restrict, or control their children’s behavior
is reflected on a third and independent dimension or continuum which is autonomy-granting and
supportive versus coercive, intrusive, and psychologically controlling parenting.
Parental reaction upon disclosure. An expansive range of emotions is felt upon the disclosure
which supports available empirical research suggesting that parents initially react with a negative
response but that over time, their reactions shift into being more positive (Robinson, Walters, and Skeen,
1989). In the study done by Savin-Williams (1995), almost half of the mothers of gay and bisexual male
college students who were told about their son's homosexuality responded with disbelief, denial, and
negative comments while one-half of the fathers who were told reacted with silence or disbelief. In another
study done by Robinson et al. (1989), the initial response was negative, with grief-like reactions and nearly
half of the respondents felt guilt for their child’s homosexuality. Another study by Ben-Ari (1995) reported
that in the first few weeks after the child’s disclosure, shock, shame, guilt, and even acknowledgment were
the common reactions. Mothers were reported to have felt greater anger and guilt while fathers were more
likely to deny and reject but the two did not differ on shame or acknowledgment. Some parents felt worried
about their child’s well-being and safety which is central to the feeling of fear of the parents (Goodrich,
2009). Additionally, fear was also expressed over how their children would interpret the parent’s reactions
as well as fear about possible loss of connection to the child. Loss was felt by the parents as in terms of
their loss of their heterosexual dream such as the wedding of their child and having their own family.
However, Goldstein (2009) found out that upon the disclosure of the child’s sexual identity, parents felt
more open and have developed trust and closer relationship with their child, became more open-minded,
accepting, and less judgmental towards the LGBT community and are even more educated of the
homosexuality of their child.
Social support. According to Goldstein (2009), parents may take time in adjusting and accepting
their child’s orientation. Parents may utilize any means to cope up with their children’s coming out and
social support may be an action strategy to move forward (Goodrich, 2009). Social support is defined as
to the various types of support (i.e. assistance/help) that people receive from others (MacArthur). Support
groups are sometimes an effective method of moving parents to the acceptance stage (Savin-Williams &
Dube, 1998 as cited in Goldstein, 2009). Parent’s satisfaction with their perceived levels of social support
was a significant factor towards reported levels of general family functioning while those families where
social support appears to be absent is lacking (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010).
The groups utilized by parents include PFLAG, LGBT-affirming spiritual support groups. This
mechanism helped parents hear stories from other parent’s stories and feel that they are not the only one
and not be ashamed of their child’s gender identity. For each of the parents, it appeared that
understanding and then finding what their own individual needs were in terms of support, was important
for their process of development.
Gender of the child. For the past years, there has been a long struggle within the LGBT movement
to push forward equal rights and acceptance. Available evidence indicates that the position of lesbians,
gays, bisexuals, and transgenders have undergone notable progress in recent decades. In Nigeria, reports
have shown that there was a significant rise in the family acceptance from 11% in 2015 to 13 % in 2017
(NOIPolls, 2017). European countries have also been found to have an increase in social acceptance
among homosexuals in Netherlands as the most LGBT-tolerant countries in Europe (Keuzenkamp &
Kuyper, 2013). However, the growing acceptance of society among homosexuals does guaranty equal
tolerance across the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) subgroups.
Attitude towards bisexual individuals is rather less positive than those homosexual individuals
(Keuzenkamp & Kuyper, 2013). Among populations of 16 years and older in Netherlands, the
preconceptions of bisexuals are those people have not yet discovered their sexual preference. This
negative view of the current level of social acceptance among bisexuals is also consistent in the study
conducted by Pew Research Center in 2013, wherein LGBT respondents were asked as to how much social
acceptance there is of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender. Results have shown that among the
subgroups, gays are perceived to have the highest level of acceptance (24%) compared to lesbians (14%)
and bisexuals (14%). Among bisexuals, female bisexuals have higher acceptance than of male bisexuals.
Bisexuals also reported having the highest perceived rejection by friends or family members (PRC, 2013).
Consequently, transgenders have the least perceived level of social acceptance (3%) (PRC, 2013).
The Australian Human Rights Commission (2013) have also reported that among the subgroups,
transgender males and females experience significantly higher rates of non-physical and physical abuse
compared with lesbians and gays. Forty-seven percent (47%) among transmen experienced verbal abuse
in 2012. This is significantly higher compared to gays (26%) and lesbians (23%).
Cognitive flexibility. Cognitive flexibility is defined as a person's (a) awareness that in any given
situation there are options and alternatives available, (b) willingness to be flexible and adapt to the
situation, and (c) self-efficacy in being flexible (Martin & Rubin, 1995). It has been associated with the
capacity of the person to have the quality of interpersonal communication (Lippar-Justice; Richmond and
McCroskey) since it drives the person to access other alternatives to cope up with the situation. Positive
scores in the cognitive flexibility scale are found to be related to communication flexibility and negative
scores to rigidity (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010). Thus, this cognitive flexibility is a highly important factor in
coping up with stressful and conflicting situations.
In the family context, a child disclosing his/identity can be a stressful and conflicting phase of the
parent-child relationship because difficult conversations tend to occur (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010).
Cognitively flexibility plays a vital role in bridging a communication towards positive adjustment. As
parents moved towards success, there appeared to be a shift in their thinking which could be expressed
in two ways: openness to changes with their child and a shift to a higher order thinking in their own life.
Religion has been shown to have a significant relationship in the development of a positive or
negative attitude towards children’s coming out. However, it appears that one cannot assume that
religiosity predicts parent’s acceptance of their child based on religiosity alone, in Goodrich & Gilbride
(2010) study, this is mediated by parent’s cognitive style. It was found that those parents who are able to
be more flexible in their thinking and not exclusively rely on religious dogma were found to be more
accepting of their children’s identity disclosure. It appears that participants had expressed a shift from a
dualistic thinking style where religious authority and dogma were accepted without question to a
relativistic thinking style (Goodrich, 2009). Perry (1981) as cited in Goodrich (2009) expressed this shift to
higher-order thinking, in moving from dogma to a self-directed thinking style.
Preconceived notions of the child’s sexual orientation . Parents may not react the expected
negative responses perhaps because they already have previous suspicions that their child is not
heterosexual. Goodrich (2009) described preconceived notions as parents’ assumptions or perceptions
of their child’s sexual orientation prior to disclosure. Parents’ background and the ways they thought and
felt about homosexuality were the two most significant factors in parents’ experiences prior to the
discovery and it serves as the best predictor of parental reactions following the discovery of a child’s
homosexuality (Ben-Ari, 1995). In the study done by Goodrich (2009), parents perceptions regarding their
child’s sexual orientation prior to coming out had a relationship with their later response. The study found
out that “parents who had some preconceived notions about their child’s sexual orientation appeared to
be less guarded with others and more likely to seek out supportive resources earlier than parents without
those notions”. Furthermore, parents in the study noticed that their homosexual children were expressing
themselves outside traditional gender norms, like males behaving in a usual feminine way like having a
greater emotional reaction and engaging in female-oriented plays, and females expressing themselves in
more traditionally masculine ways like acting and dressing more like a “tomboy”. Parents having the idea
that their child may not be heterosexual due to the child’s gender-atypical behavior and interests
increases their awareness of having a homosexual child. Gender atypicality such as girls enjoying sports
and boys playing with dolls is associated with homosexuality (Savin-Williams & Dube, 1998).
Religion. In the midst of its current great transition, religion remains an emerging powerful force
to be reckoned with. Religion creates a cultural meaning for interpersonal relations as individuals and
societies develop interactively (Etengoff & Daiute, 2013 as cited in Adamczyk, A., & Pitt, C.,2009).
Across the world, personal religious beliefs and affiliation are typically seen as a predictor of
attitudes about homosexuality (Levy & Reeves, 2011). According to Adamczyk & Pitt (2009) religious tools,
such as God and texts have reportedly been used in both relationally maladaptive (theistic triangulation)
and adaptive ways (theistic mediation).
Religion is prevalently known in associating behaviors with homosexuality as ‘‘unnatural”,
‘‘ungodly” and ‘‘impure” (Yip, 2005) due to its homoprohibitive texts especially in Orthodox Jewish and
religious Christians (Adamczyk & Pitt, 2009). Citing two verses in the Bible, Mark 10: 6-9, Leviticus 18:22
and Leviticus 20:13 respectively;
“6 But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’[a] 7 ‘For this reason a man
will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, [b] 8 and the two will become one
flesh.’[c] So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let
no one separate.”
“You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.”
“If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have
committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltiness is upon them.”
Due to its framing, active religious involvement, regular exposure to religious literature, and
frequent interaction with religious friends are likely to encourage anti-homosexual attitudes (Olson et al.,
2006; Sherkat and Ellison, 1997; Scheitle and Adamczyk, 2009 as cited in Adamczyk & Pitt, 2009). Likewise,
fear of divine punishment for individuals and the society in which they live may lead more religious people
to encourage others to adopt anti-homosexual attitudes and institute policies that are consistent with
intolerance (Wilcox, 1996; Regnerus and Smith, 1998).
Such religious values and activities have successfully mediated cultural and familial conflicts in
the maladaptive way of theistic triangulation. According to Butler & Harper (1994), theistic triangulation
is the process of restructuring familial power dynamics by assigning blame, guilt, and sin through
invocation of God or claims of personal revelation. Theistic triangulation has been reported by gays to be
the primary source of familial conflict and pain during post-coming-out process, highlighting the
interaction between religious and familial systems (Adamczyk & Pitt, 2009).
However, researchers suggest that specific aspects of religiosity are inversely correlated with the
acceptance of sexual minorities (e.g., gay, lesbian, bisexual and queer individuals), with religious parents
of sexual minority youth reporting varying levels of difficulty (Adamczyk, & Pitt, 2009; Conley, 2011;
Freedman, 2008; Hooghe, Claes, Harell, Quintelier, & Dejaeghere, 2010; Oldmixon, & Calfano, 2007 as cited
in Adamczyk & Pitt, 2009). Reports have shown that religion was also used in relationally productive and
reparative ways via meditational strategies such as using religious values and prayer to become a family
ally called theistic mediation. Theistic mediation is the process by which religious family members utilize
religion to defend their positions, reconcile conflicts, and mediate familial relationships in post-coming-
out contexts. For example, religious values such as brotherly love may be used by a parent to help them
focus on fostering a loving relationship;
“For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
(Galatians 5:14)
“Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. 2 Do not forget to show hospitality to
strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. 3
Continue to remember those in prison as if you were together with them in prison, and those who
are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.” (Hebrews 13:1-3)
Heterosexism. The construct of heterosexism was identified by Herek (1990) which is defined as
“systematic process of privilege toward heterosexuality related to homosexuality based on the notion that
heterosexuality is normal and ideal” (Dermer, Smith, & Barto, 2010, p. 327 as cited in Smith, 2004). This is
essentially the supposition that the heterosexual sets the standard and they are the ideals with who
reflects superiority in the society (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010). Traced on the course of history across
disciplines, there is the recognition of the existence of prejudices which we are unconscious about (Ellis,
Kitzinger, & Wilkinson, 2002; Peel, 2001; Shelton & Delgado-Romero, 2011; Sue et al., 2007). This roots
from the assumption that identities belonging in the homosexual spectrum are unnatural which result to
rejection and stigmatization of the non-heterosexual behaviors, actions, and views.
Park (2001) constructed the Heterosexism scale to address the need and measure the attitudes
of heterosexuals towards the members of LGB in a covert manner, together with the acceptance of
bisexuals as part of the entire diversity of sexual orientations. The bias that exists within our system
provides that inclination toward an idea, person or belief over another. Present researches will say that
superiority of heterosexuality can be evident in the various how our laws are drafted (Lambda Legal, 2011;
Park, 2001), religion (Barnard, 2009; Garcia, Graystanley, & Ramirez-Valles, 2008; Goodwill, 2000; Love,
Bock, Jannarone, & Richardson, 2005; Park, 2001; Sherry, Adelman, Whilde, & Quick, 2010), education
(Park, 2001; Goodrich & Luke, 2009, 2010), family (Gallor, 2006; Goodrich, 2009; Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010),
and mass media (Park, 2001). Again, widespread heterosexism in society establishes that the only
normatively acceptable sexual behaviors are heterosexual (Herek and Garnets 2007).
Given how heterosexism works, this can be put into the parents’ perspective upon disclosure of
the child’s sexual orientation which is hypothesized to influence the post-disclosure period of adjustment
of the parent within the realm of dynamics of the child’s family.

Locus of causality of parents. The parents’ acceptance or rejection upon disclosure of child’s
sexual orientation plays a significant part for this influences the general well-being and welfare of sexual
minorities, on how they would maneuver this shift individually and within the dynamics of family
relationships. One strong predictor of parental acceptance or rejection is the attributions parents hold
regarding the nature of their child’s homosexual orientation (Haider-Merkel & Joslyn, 2008). Kelly (1973)
presents that how people attribute the causes of one’s behavior establishes the kind of attitude and
affective response translated towards that person. Evidence would suggest that how a parent reacts to
the child’s same-sex attractions “may be contingent on their causal attributions of homosexuality”
(Willoughby, Doty & Malik, 2008).
The etiology of homosexuality can be looked within the two lenses, for some people grasp this
being innate and we’re bound to be predisposed to this tendency while the other lies on the impression of
it being a lifestyle choice where the attribution theory comes into the picture. The analysis using the
attribution theory starts with an outcome. This result will be embedded on how will it makes sense when
a person searches the locus of the cause, whether people determine the behavior as a result of internal
and enduring dispositions or it came from less stable situational forces (Heider 1944, 1958)
In relation to this, Weiner (1979,1985) presented another separate dimension, controllability
which needs to be included wherein it is high in contrast with the existence of dispositional factors which
can be the probable reason of how an individual behaves; goes hand in hand with locus (internal/external)
and stability (stable/unstable). Controllability emphasizes the idea of responsibility which turned out to
be useful in the assessment of causal attributions made towards stigmatized groups (Markel & Joslyn,
2008). Weiner and his colleagues made the use of attribution of controllability to stigmatized individuals
and groups (Weiner, Perry, and Magnusson, 1988). The theory offered that those people who are seen that
they personally caused their stigma, that they are ruled by own selection to become one will be assessed
more negatively in comparison to others who are stigmatized under the spark of misfortune and
unfortunate events.
Homosexuality in the sense that is understood as biological in nature expresses that sexual
orientation is governed by an uncontrollable force which is irrefutable will be responded more positively.
On the other hand, it made the homosexuals stand to be responsible for their homosexuality when it is
mainly realized as a product of acquisition of learning or a personal choice and since this is seen to be
reversible, the individual will be evaluated more negatively and low level of sympathy for them. Indeed,
there is some research that suggests that external causal attributions are associated with a less negative
bias toward stigmatized populations (Corrigan, 2000; DeJong, 1980; Diedrichs & Barlow, 2011; Weiner,
Perry, & Magnusson, 1988). Anchored on the notion that attributions for the causes of homosexuality have
been shown to relate to one’s attitudes toward gays and lesbians (Altemeyer, 2001; Furnham & Taylor,
1990; Hewitt & Moore, 2002), all these things put together, this stresses the focus that nature of the cause
is associated more with anti-gay (Willoughby, Doty & Malik, 2008). These results are deemed consistent
for many other supporting studies conducted (Aguero, Block, and Byrne 1984; Sakalli, 2002; Tygart 2000;
Whitley 1990; Wilcox and Norrander 2002; Wilcox and Wolpert 2000; Wood and Bartkowski 2004). This
factor poses its substantiality on the process of parental adjustments considering that when less
homosexuality was perceived as under the control of the adolescents, higher level of affection was
demonstrated, and conversely more fury, anger, and negative emotions spring forth for those perceived it
was under the adolescent’s control (Armesto & Weisman, 2001).
Parent’s gender. In D’Augelli and Hershberger’s (1993) study, youth reported that, of the mothers
disclosed to, 55% were accepting, 25% were tolerant, 8% were intolerant but not rejecting, and 12% were
rejecting. For fathers, 37% were accepting, 36% were tolerant, 10% were intolerant but not rejecting, and
18% were rejecting. Although these findings suggest mothers may respond with more acceptance than
fathers, more recent studies have challenged these results. Ben-Ari (1995) found that although fathers
were more likely to initially deny their child’s homosexuality, they were less likely to respond with anger
and guilt compared with mothers.
Past studies have also found that mothers are inclined to be more accepting than fathers (Ben-
Ari, 1995; D’Augelli & Hershberger, 1993; D’Augelli, Hershberger, & Pilkington., 1998; Maguen, Floyd,
Bakeman, & Armistead, 2002). D’Augelli and colleagues (1998) found that 42% of fathers and 19% of
mothers rejected or were intolerant of their child at the time of initial disclosure.
Parent’s reactions and family functioning. Parental rejection because of coming out and
disclosure of sexual orientation to parent have an implication on the psychological well-being of
adolescents that will carry on in their life. In a more specific context, the negative reactions this will extend
ranges to depression (Legate et al. 2012), substance abuse (Baiocco et al. 2010) and even risk the stability
of their identity (Willoughby et al., 2010). This support is critical for youth in times of their vulnerability
(Auerbach, Bigda-Peyton, Eberhart, Webb, & Ho, 2011).
The effect that the identified factors in relation to the parental adjustment further translates to a
family which bears the “potential to disrupt family boundaries, roles, and values (Crosbie-Burnett et al.,
1996). This process can be described by Family Stress Theory (Patterson, 2002). This theory tries to
explain why some families get to adapt and maintain the strength in reaction to a stressful life event while
some resulted to the weakening of family relationships or even worst (Hill, 1949; McCubbin & Patterson,
1983). Willoughby, Doty & Malik (2008) emphasized that coming out to parents can be seen as a stressful
event in the lives of the family involved since it introduces a change in the family system. The line of
parental adjustment can be linked to these elements a family’s relational capabilities and competencies,
family members’ beliefs about meanings of stressful events, and the number of stressors that undermine
family stability (Willoughby et al. 2008). This boils down to family functioning which is defined as “the
process of working together” (Goodrich, 2009).
Focusing on the family-based resources, this suggests that factors such as cohesion, adaptability
and problem-solving influences parental reactions to their child’s sexual orientation disclosure
(Willoughby, Doty & Malik, 2008). In the context of homosexuality, it presented a support as well for this
claim. A study by Magruder (1999) yielded the results that when a homosexual youth has higher ratings
of positive family relations, more likely that they will be more open to them on their sexuality. A multi-
ethnic study on the other hand who utilized a sample of gay youth presented that those who perceived
their families as cohesive and adaptive received a more positive reaction from parents. The study of
Leaveck (1994) supported this finding who found that those sexual minority youths reported their families
having strong problem-solving capabilities in terms of solving conflicts and communicate earned a better
response in comparison to those who described their family lack this skill. Though this line of argument
is limited in so many ways, this can suggest the function of supportive reactions according to the
existence of family-based strengths or the higher level of family functioning can provide an implication of
a sympathetic response from parents (Willoughby, Doty & Malik, 2008). Along with the idea that parental
reactions upon disclosure can be influenced by the perceived family functioning, it goes on to the
adjustment period for Goodrich (2009) exhibited that when parents get to adjust and acknowledge the
new identity disclosed, there will be an observed strengthened connection with their children on post-
disclosure.
Statement of the Problem
The study aims to determine the perceptions and evaluations of parents with children belonging
to the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender) community and the process of their adjustment
upon knowing. In addition, the proposed factors influencing this process proceeding to parental
acceptance is also looked into.
In relation to this, the researcher aims to answer the following questions:
1. What are the parents’ conceptions of homosexuality?
2. What is their locus of causality why a person in general turns out to belong in LGBT?
3. What are the cues used by parents to determine the gender identity of their child?
4. What is their locus of causality about their children’s gender identity?
5. What are the cognitive and emotional reactions of the parents upon confirmation of their child’s
gender identity?
6. What are the changes and experiences of the parents on the post-confirmation in terms of:
a) Personal feelings towards the child
b) Parent-child relationship
c) Family closeness
d) View of own self as a parent
7. How do parents cope upon confirmation of their child’s gender identity?
8. What is the level of acceptance of the respondents?
9. Which of the following variables are significant predictors of parental acceptance:
a) Level of Social Support
b) Gender of the Child
c) Gender of the Parent
d) Cognitive Flexibility
e) Preconceived notions
f) Religiosity
g) Heterosexism Bias
h) Locus of Causality
i) Perceived Family Functioning

Conceptual Framework
On the basis of previous literature, the researcher proposed potential predictors of parental
acceptance. Figure 1 illustrates the relationship between parental acceptance and its predictor variables.
Figure 1. The relationship between predictor variables and parental acceptance
This study will explore the relationships may it be directly or indirectly of the 9 proposed
predictors: (1) social support, (2) cognitive flexibility, (3) pre-conceived notions, (4) religiosity, (5)
heterosexism bias, (6) gender of the parent, (7) locus of causality, (8) gender of the child and (9) perceived
family functioning to parental acceptance. Base on previous literature, all 9 variables are expected to have
significant predictive value.
In addition, parent’s satisfaction with their perceived levels of social support was a significant
factor towards reported levels of general family functioning while those families where social support
appears to be absent is lacking (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010). Religion, on the other hand, is related to
cognitive flexibility. It appears that one cannot assume that religiosity predicts parent’s acceptance of
their child based on religiosity alone, in Goodrich & Gilbride (2010) study, this is mediated by parent’s
cognitive style. It was found that those parents who are able to be more flexible in their thinking and not
exclusively rely on religious dogma were found to be more accepting of their children’s identity disclosure.
Regarding the heterosexism bias, parents are hypothesized to have a negative attitude and
reaction for they are guided by the idea that heterosexuality holds the superiority and dominates the social
flow and so preferred than those that identified themselves as homosexual, the individuals that are prone
to be subjected on stigmatization. Conversely, those who have a lower level of heterosexism bias
suggests a more supportive reaction tendency upon the disclosure and post-disclosure period.
Parents who have preconceived notions of their child’s sexual orientation is hypothesized to have
a positive reaction upon the disclosure of the child’s sexual identity for they already have little idea about
the homosexuality of the child. Their preconceived notions as to the sexual identity of their child are
products of observed behaviors of their child from childhood until the moment of disclosure.
It is hypothesized that mothers react more positively towards a child’s disclosure and are inclined
to accept more than the fathers. Although fathers reject child’s disclosure and react more negatively,
acceptance of the child’s sexual identity will be realized time pass by. Consequently, it is expected that
among the gender subgroups, transgender will have the lowest acceptance followed by bisexuals to
lesbians. Gays will have the highest level of acceptance.
Family functioning, on the other hand, plays a role both in opening the sexual orientation to
parents and the adjustment period that follows which is hypothesized to go along in this path. In the initial
response of parents, it will provide a more positive response when the family is highly adaptable to
stressful situations and satisfies the aspect of cohesiveness between the members. On the post-
disclosure, since the coming out of homosexual child can be considered a stressful event in one’s family
life not only to the parents but even to the members, this can pose a potential instability to the family’s
values and beliefs. This association presents that adjustment of parents on knowing the sexual
orientation of their child can threaten the existing family functioning.

METHODOLOGY
Research Design
The researchers employed both descriptive and predictive research design. The qualitative aspect
of the study dealt with the experiences of heterosexual parents with LGBT identified children in terms of
parental reactions and process of adjustment. On the other hand, the quantitative phase will be identifying
the predicting variables in parent’s adjustment process. The following were the variables explored in this
study: level of social support, cognitive flexibility, preconceived notions, religiosity, heterosexism bias, the
gender of the parent, gender of the child, and locus of causality of homosexuality. Descriptive research
design was used in determining the level of acceptance among the participants. Predictive research
design was made use to discern the significant predictors of this across the pre and post disclosure of
homosexuality.
Research Setting
The study was conducted around Cebu which essentially has Cebu City at its capital where the
study was initially gauged. Most of the respondents came from the Southern part of Cebu, specifically at
Toledo City. The places were chosen given that the researchers primarily depend on referrals from friends
and/or relatives in looking for respondents.
Sampling Design
The study utilized non-probabilistic sampling through the means of convenient sampling. The
respondents were approached on whoever was available at the moment in the time of data collection of
the researcher or appointments were made to parents referred by friends and/or relatives to guarantee
accommodation of the interviews. The number of participating parents was decided to be 59 considering
that the subject of this study were minorities.

Research Participants
The participants in this study were heterosexual parents with LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and
Transgender) identified sons or daughters in their youth (15-24 years of age). In this study, parents will
be defined as individuals who viewed themselves as a father or a mother of an LGBT child, either based
on biology, legal adoption, foster or guardianship or step-relationship (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010). On the
other hand, the parent’s child was the one who identifies her/ his self-based on his/her gender
identification.
A total of 59 respondents were gathered for this study. There were 51 females and 8 males, with
ages ranging from 25-72 years old (M=50.68, SD=1.11). Among them, there were 14 who were college
graduates and 14 that were high school graduates, 10 high school level followed by 9 that were college
level. There were 3 who are elementary graduate and 2 that were elementary level as their highest
educational attainment. 55 of the respondents were Roman Catholic by religion and the 4 remained
claimed to be Christian. 47 of the participants perceived themselves belonging to middle class, 9 being
poor and 3 participants as rich in their socio-economic status. These parents had confirmed their children
to be homosexual for a time frame ranging from 1 year to 31 years (M=12.78, SD=7.22).
Research Instrument
For this study, a questionnaire was created as an instrument. This was made up of five (5) parts:
Part I of the instrument relates to the preliminary information upon disclosure of homosexual child
regarding his or her sexual identity. This is mainly composed of eight (8) open-ended questions, with three
(3) of which having some follow-up to elaborate more on the said topics.
Part II covers the period following disclosure where parental adjustment comes in. It mainly
composed of two (2) open-ended questions and three (3) dichotomous questions which have follow-up
questions.
Part III is where the scales and measures of the other variables were lined up. The first variable is
social support wherein there are 15 statements assessed using 7 pt. scale with 1-Strongly Disagree and
7-Strongly Agree (α=0.749). The perceived family functioning of each parent was also measured through
15 statements still using 7 pt. scale with 1-Strongly Disagree and 7-Strongly Agree. However, in data
analysis, when Cronbach alpha was run, it gave the value of α=0.587. Even after removing 11 items that
were seen to have an inter-item correlation less than 0.30, its reliability did not pass (α=0.657). The
researchers decided not to include this variable into further interpretations with its limitation on reliability
value. Cognitive flexibility scale followed with another 12 statements evaluated using 7 pt. scale with 1-
Strongly Disagree and 7-Strongly Agree. There are 6 items that did not satisfy the inter-item correlation
which was removed (Items 1,2,4,8,10 and 12), the internal consistency changed from α=0.661 into
α=0.734; the perfect score was changed from 84 to 42. The third scale is religiosity that comprised of 10
statements. Items that did not pass the inter-item correlation was also removed (Items 2,4,5 and 9)
making the reliability value of α=0.734. The dependent variable, parental acceptance consists of 12
statements, with 3 statements per factor that are randomly arranged (α=0.865). The last measure is a
bipolar scale that consists of 13 items with each having opposite terms that the respondents need to
weigh which would reflect their heterosexism bias (α=0.814).
The last part of the questionnaire was the demographic profile of the respondents that provided
information about their age, gender, religion, highest educational attainment and perceived-socio
economic status. The instrument was stated in English and was also translated into Cebuano dialect.
The instrument was pre-tested to five (5) parents. The only concern raised was the length of the
interviews that will take up a considerable time that lasted for 30-54 minutes per parent. These were noted
yet the instrument cannot be therefore shortened for it already covered the entire scope of the study. The
researcher decided not to remove any variable and pursue for the reason that no confusions on the
statements were observed.

Research Procedure
The instrument was prepared and edited first beforehand before data collection proceeded. Since
the study utilized a convenient sampling, anyone who was available around the setting was approached
or the referred individuals are contacted. Before the interview and survey were conducted, the researcher
first introduced themselves and what school they from, and what is the study all about and why they are
conducting the study. The researchers asked consent from them if they are willing to participate or not.
To aid some confusions on transcription of data, participants were also asked if it is okay for them that
the interview be recorded. Lastly, the respondent assured the anonymity and confidentiality of their
information and gratitude were expressed through giving simple words of thank you after. The interview
lasted for roughly 35 minutes each respondent, wherein the data collection was completed for a
cumulative period of around 3 weeks.
Data Analysis
Descriptive statistics were used to have the means and corresponding standard deviations of the
data. Also, multiple regression analysis was run to determine the significant predictors of parental
acceptance, level of significance pegged at p<.05. As for those questions that require qualitative analysis,
themes were discerned based on the responses of the participants which were carefully filtered out to
have a general umbrella of a cluster of answers. An inter-reliability test was conducted to discern if there
was a degree of agreement for qualitative items. Cohen's kappa coefficient shows significant values for
the qualitative measure of the study which posits concurrence of categorization of raters among
qualitative questions where significance was still pegged at p<.05 (For question 1: κ=0.877, p=0.00; For
question 2: κ=0.883, p=0.00; For question 4: κ=1, p=0.00; For question 4.1: κ=.344, p=0.00 and for question
7: κ=.498, p=0.00)
RESULTS AND DISCUSSION
. A total of 59 parents, mostly mothers were interviewed for this analysis. With this population,
parents of gay individuals were the most numbered (N= 32), followed by lesbians (N= 16), transgender (N=
7) and bisexuals (N= 5). Respondents reported relatively high level of acceptance towards their non-
conforming gender child (M= 5.66, SD= .98) as per measured through a 12 –statement 7-point Likert
scale. In line with this, proposed predictors were subjected to further analysis in order to determine
significant predictors of parental acceptance.
Conceptions of Non-Conventional Gender Identity
The first question that was asked pertains to how the respondents define homosexuality in its general
sense. The responses covered a broad range of points with how the parents perceive it. The observed
themes were as follows: (a) in reference to the qualities of their own child, (b) approval of homosexuality
but with reservations, (c) being human like everyone else, (d) identity crisis and lastly, (e) religious
explanations. As presented, some directed their definition in reference to the qualities of their own child
is the first theme which is reflected in the words of one 52-year-old female respondent who has a gay
child,
“Para nako, pareha sa akong anak nga babay og lalaki, kuan man siya kamao man siya
musabot, wala sad siya nag binayot jud, pero niingun najud siya nga dili niya kaya mag linaki.”
(For me, just like my other female and male children, he knows how to understand and did
not appear to be too gay, but he expressed that he cannot take to be a man)
Another 48-year-old mother added her homosexual children’s role in helping them and highlighted the
aspect that a homosexual does not need to be afraid for they are not a different case,
“Kung maglisod makatabang jud diay. Wala ko naguol nga duha na akong bayot kay
makatabang sila namo. Di sad kita ray magbuot sa atong anak, support nalang paghuman unya
tambagan. Mag ampo sad ta nga di sila maadto sa dautan. Kaming inahan di man sad imo rang
pasagdan kung naingana jud sila, ato lang sila ingnon nga okay ra ingana kay daghan naman sila”
(When we have a hard time, they can really help. I am not worried that I have two gay children for
they can help us. We cannot decide alone for our children, let us support them and give them
advice. Let us pray that they will not go to bad fate. We, as mothers, cannot ignore them if they
happen to be that way; let us tell them it is okay to be like that since a lot of them turned out to be
that way.)
A different light of answer under the same theme was uttered by 54-year-old mother of a gay who said,
“Okay na lang kay naay anak nga bayot”
(It is already okay because I have a gay child.)
This answer leads us to the second theme of responses of their approval of homosexuality but with certain
reservations mirrored by the sentiments of one-64-year old mother,
“Okay ra basta dili magpabuyag ug walay bisyo”
(It is okay as long as they are not disobedient and does not have vices.)
This can be supported by a view of a 41-year-old father of a lesbian with,
“Wala koy problems. Ang ako kay magtarong sila sa ilang kinabuhi nga dili sila ma-
underestimate”
(I have no problems. All I want is that they will mend a life that they will not be underestimated.)
The third theme expressed them being a human being like everyone else, with one-54-year old mother
who added the imperfectness a human has. A 53-year-old father pointed that it is not their will, nor they
were taught to become like that,
“Pareha sila taw nako. Naa pa lang sa tiyan pagbuot jud kay wala gitudlo nga mabayot sila. Dili
man ka makahibaw mabayot inig kat-on ug buot, mao dili kulatahon. Suportaan ug tambagan
lang sa sakto na paagi.”
(They are humans like me. When they are still in the womb, it is not taught to them that they will
become gay. One will not know whether a baby will turn out gay in growing up, so they should not
be beaten up. They need to be given advices in a proper manner.)
However, under the same umbrella, another 46-year-old mother accentuated their expression of sexuality
in opposition to what it is supposed to be,

“Pareha sila nato mga taw, pero magpakababay og magpakalalaki lang sila nga bali sa ilang
sexualidad”
(They are just like us, humans, but they show their sexuality in opposite )
A 49-year-old female respondent added the point that they change their fashion and appearance as well
in relation to the sexual orientation they identify to.
Another theme observed is the idea of identity crisis, wherein the homosexuals were perceived that they
want to change the sexuality assigned to them. A 45-year-old mother said that they are,
“Babae siya nga ganahan malalake or lalake nga ganahan mababae”
(Women that want to be males or males that want to turn into women.)
In relation to this, a 72-year-old father disclosed his concern with the effects of this in breeding confusion
instead,
“Dili man na maayo kay laki raman jud og babae kay maglibog ka babae or lalaki”
(That is not good because there is only male and female, you’ll get confused whether woman or
man.)
The next theme discerned is grounded on religious explanations wherein some of the parents perceived
homosexuality as God-given. In divergence to this view, one 51-year-old mother of three bisexuals opened
up her despise. She felt that homosexuality does not go with what the Bible says for God created only
man and woman.
“It is a sin because it is against the design sa Ginoo. It is something accepted sa society, but I
detest. Sige ko ug pray na matul-id akong mga anak.”
(It is a sin because it is against the design of God. It is something accepted in the society, but I
detest. I always pray that my children will become straight.)
A few responses see homosexuality as uncontrollable and cannot be escaped from. One admitted that
she cannot explain this concept while another confessed that she did not know.
Locus of Causality Why People Turns Out to be Homosexuals
The second question is the notions of the respondents of the underlying reasons why people turn out to
become homosexuals. Four themes emerged: (a) inheritance, (b) environment, (c) abrupt and (d) do not
know.
The most frequent answer presented that homosexuality comes from inheritance and is highly genetic,
with some of the respondents accounted this to relatives. Furthermore, few cited that it is from birth. The
next theme of responses expanded this to the environment and circle of people that is always around. A
53-year-old father conferred,
“Sa palibot sa mga ig-agaw ug friends. Pirmi magkuyog mao masagol sa lihok sa babae ug mag
binabaye”
(It is because of the circle of cousins and friends that one goes with always, so their actions
become mixed on actions of women)
A 55-year-old male respondent having a lesbian child supported this opinion,
“Ang barkada pirmi sa tomboy kay ang lalaki unya ang kaduwa pud pareha ra sa bayot na babae
unya magtakod-takod”
(The close friends of a lesbian are the guys and the playmates of the gays were women and it gets
passed on.)
The third theme presented why one becomes homosexuals because it is what their heart feels. A 72-year-
old father thought that,
“Pagbati na sa ilang kasingkasing nga mao jud nang butanga”
(It is the feelings of their heart and that is the thing.)
One respondent presented that homosexuality is abrupt. A response of 36-year-old mother had a different
explanation,
“Sobra sa pangga, na-spoiled.”
(Being cared too much and become spoiled.)

Finally, the prevailing responses that followed is that they do not know how homosexuals turned out to be
one reflected by the answer of one-54-year old female,
“Ambot, maka-question gani ko.”
(I don’t know, I can question as well.)
Preconceived Notions of Gender Identity
Although some of the children admitted their sexuality to their parents, many of them were detected ever
since when they were a child. The following are the themes recognized across the responses, (a) deviation
from expected behaviors (e.g. activities, conduct and preference), (b) the type of relationship their child
gets in to and (c) the physical manifestations at birth.
A deviation of an expected behaviour for a particular set of gender is the main manifestation as to why
parents have already concluded that their child is a homosexual. The first set is in terms divergence of the
activities, conduct and preference of the child. For example, for gays and transgender (woman),
“Girly ang niluhakan, choice of things. Grabe kaayo mu-arrange ug mga butang. Nitug-an sad jud
siya nga bayot siya.”
(He has some girly manners and choice of things. He is also very keen in arranging things. He
also admitted that he is a gay.)
“Pag 4th year HS siya, wala na siya nisud sa CAT, niana siya: dili nanako kaya mag linaki.”
(When he was in 4th year high school, he didn’t enter CAT classes. He said that he can’t act manly.)
Daan pa pagbata, magkiay-kiya nya manul-ob ug bra ug panty, magdula ug doll. Wala nalang sad
namo hilabti”
(Ever since he was a child, she would sway his hips while walking and he would wear bras and
panties and play Barbie dolls. We didn’t bother him.)
For lesbians,
“Dili ganahan magdress kay magpurol ra.”
(She doesn’t like wearing dresses, she would always wear pants.)
“Kung magduwa panlalaki, volleyball, basket.Iyang nawng kay tomboyon og proma, linginon.”
(She would play games for boys, example, volleyball, basketball, and her circular face resembles
and lesbian.)
“Magdala mag short sa skwelahan nya ig abot ddto hubuon ang sayal mag ilis,Nisurti siya nga
ma-admire siyag babae. Musurti sila og mabroken hearted sila.”
(She would always bring with her pants in her school and remove her skirt and change to pants.
She also told me that she admires girls and even tell me that she got herself broken hearted.)
Aside from deviations in terms of the activities, conduct and preference of the child, the type of
relationship that their child gets into is a main hint of their child’s homosexuality. A father of a lesbian
said,
“Naa gi-char-char-an na babae. Nasakpan nga ga-date sa Recreation.”
(She was having a fling with a girl and I caught them dating in the Recreation.)
A mother of a lesbian also confessed that there was one time that her child said that she was in a
relationship but was shocked it brought a girl in the house.
The above mentioned are manifestations as their child is growing up. However, some of the respondents
said that ever since it came out from their womb they already know that their child is a homosexual.
Quoting from a mother of a gay,
“Nakahibaw kay niingon ang nurse nga ma-bayot siya kay puti ug itlog”
(I already know it because the nurse said that my child will become homosexual because her
scrotum is white.)
Cues of Gender Identity
Respondents were asked if they noticed signs of their child’s sexual identity before the disclosure. There
was a variety of signs that the respondents noticed from their child. The following were the themes
discerned from the study: (a) the child’s actions whether it is feminine or masculine in nature, (b) the
physical manifestations or expressions of the child’s sexual identity, (c) having feelings towards the same
sex, (d) having a romantic relationship with the same sex, (e) peers, and (f) the physical appearance of the
genitalia.
The sign that was mostly mentioned is the child’s actions, whether it is feminine or masculine in nature
that deviates from what is expected of their gender. In the words of a respondent who has a lesbian child:
“Varsity mana siya sa volleyball sa ilang skwelahan nya sauna pa dili na siya musul-ob ug dress
nya gipanghatag na. Bugoy sad ug nilihukan.”
(She was part of the varsity team in volleyball in her school. Even long before she didn’t want to
wear dresses and she would give it away. Her actions are also kind of manly).
In addition to the statement above, another respondent supported that the actions of her gay child were
feminine compared to what they expected of him,
“Oh kay ang buhat sa babay kay mao man iyang buhatun, di man siya ganahan muhakot og tubig,
siyay manglimpyo manilhig. Pag 12 years old niya naa nay signs
(Yes, I noticed some signs such that things that are usually done by girls are the things that he
likes to do. He doesn’t want to fetch water, so he cleans the house instead. He was 12 years old
when we noticed some signs.), she said.
Another sign that was noticed is the physical manifestations showing the child’s sexual identity which
involves the haircut, hair color, accessories, and clothing preferences. One respondent enumerated the
signs she noticed of her child. In the words of one respondent,
“Mag sandal sandal, magbra-bra, magpakigol nya mag make-up.”
(He wears sandals, bra, short shorts, and make-up)
Another respondent also has the same sentiments regarding her child’s physical manifestations and she
said,
“Ang nilihukan kay girly, ang pangpilion niya nga butang kay pangbabae ug sa iyang pag-arrange
sa iyang butang.”
(His actions are feminine as well as his preferences for his things, including how he arrange them.”
One respondent noticed both physical manifestations and the feelings of her child toward the opposite
sex which is the third theme for the signs.
“Maibog ug bola.Niingun siya nako nga mapatupi siya, patrimman iyang buhok kanang V kuno
pero kanang panglalaki kuno. Ganahan man siya anang pinatomboy nga buhok. Perte nakong
sukoa. Musul ob na siyag panlalaki, Nisulti siya nga ma-admire siyag babae. Musulti sila og
mabroken hearted sila.”
(She prefers to have a basketball and told me that she wants to have her hair cut in a “V” style like
that of a boy because she wants to have that “tomboy” look. I was angry because of that. She also
wears manly clothes. She also told me that she admires other girls and they also get their hearts
broken.)
In addition to feelings towards the opposite sex, another respondent shared that the child suddenly
swayed his hips and his notebook was full of names of his boy crushes, but he didn’t wear feminine vulgar
clothes.
In relation to the feelings towards the opposite sex, there were two respondents who identified that the
sign they only noticed was when they knew of their child’s romantic relationship with an opposite sex.
“Dugay gitago. Creates a new FB Account. Pag 2014 naay ka chat nga babae from another country
na gi-introduce as her girlfriend pero abi nako friend ra nga girl pero nakaingon siya nga mas
malipayon siya kung babae.”
(She kept it for a long time. She created a new Facebook account. Back in 2014, she had a female
chatmate from another country and she introduced that girl as her girlfriend. She even said that
she is happier with her compared with her husband.)
The other respondent said that her daughter unexpectedly told them that she has a girlfriend and that was
the only sign they got.
One sign that was also noticed by parents who for an instance have a gay child is that the peers who are
always around are either female or gay. This is the same with parents who has a lesbian child. One parent
of a gay child shared,
“Babae kaayo ang nilihukan nya hinhin. Lahi ang nilihukan, barkada mangarte.”
(His actions were very feminine, different from a boy and his peers wears make up.)
Another respondent added that the child loves to sway his hips and his playmates were usually females.
He also prefers things that are feminine. There was one respondent who noticed that the female genitalia
of her child since birth did not have the hole that is expected. Moreover, another respondent disclosed
that she only knew of her child’s sexual identity when her husband died. Lastly, one respondent did not
identify any sign but thinks that her second homosexual child idolized the first homosexual child.
There were respondents who never noticed any sign of homosexuality from their child. They only knew
when the child came out maybe because they were afraid to come out earlier.
First Reactions of Parents Upon Confirmation
Cognitive reaction. Parent respondents were asked of their first thoughts on the child’s gender
identity. The following are the themes found for the responses given by the respondent, (a) neutrality of
feeling, (b) feelings of shock, worry, feeling of waste and anger, (c) questioning of the self as a parent, (d)
thoughts of acceptance with reservation, (e) the belief that their child is going through an identity crisis
and (e) non-acceptance.
Some of the parents have a neutral take on this matter expressing that neither did they feel happy or sad
because for one they have already known their child’s identity ever since and/or they know that their child
is good enough despite its homosexual identity. A 48-year-old mother of a gay expressed that,
“Wala raman kay maayo raman siyang bataa so ako rajud gidawat dayon. Basta di lang
manghilabot sa laing taw”
(Nothing, because I know he is a good child so I have accepted him directly as long as he doesn’t
meddle with other people)
On the other hand, some of the parents conveyed feelings of shock, worry, feeling of waste and anger on
their child’s disclosure. However, despite these feelings, they have chosen to accept their child, because
they don’t have a choice because it’s already there and there’s nothing they can do about it.
Shocks were noted especially for parents who didn’t see any signs of possibility of their child being
homosexual.
“Siyempre nashock ko kay sauna wala siya maging-na atong buhi pa akong pares”
(Of course, I was shocked; she was not like that when my husband was still alive.)
Aside from shock, parents were also worried of their child’s homosexual identity. This extends to their
concern on their child’s future, emotional well-being and the possible rejection that they may receive from
the people around. Quoting from the parent respondents:

“Basin nya dili siya makatrabaho, labi na wala siyay grado. Dili mudawat og baypt kung muadto
siyag sales lady.”
(I am worried that he will not be employed especially he has not finished his education. Gays are
not accepted for example if they want to become saleslady.)
“Kanang mabroken hearted. Mangita og lain ilang uyab. Mao nay realidad sa ilang sitwasyon.”
(I am worried that t she will be broken hearted. Her girlfriend might leave her and find a boyfriend.
It is the reality of their situation.)
“Mahadlok ko kay basin bugal-bugalan siya, nya di man kadawat iyang mga tatay og mga igsuon,
ingun gud na siya sa iyang tatay nga piste kang bayota ka.”
(I am worried that people will make fun of him because he is gay. Additionally, his father and his
siblings cannot accept him. His father once cursed him because of his homosexuality.)
Some parents felt that their child’s homosexuality is a lost. A mother of a gay once said,
“Sayang kay hitsuraan ug naay height pero wala na ta mabuhat. Ang ginikanan wala mabuhat
kundi musuporta.”
(It is somewhat a waste because he is tall and handsome, but we can’t do anything about it.
Parents cannot do anything but support their child.)
The feeling of sadness also lingers in the thoughts of some parents. A 54-year old mother of a lesbian
expressed,
“Guol jud kaayo ko kay only girl biya na namo. dapat kuyog unta mi magshopping, kanang mga
mother-daughter nga buhatonon.Wala jud ko nalipay ato kay as a parent daghan na unta biya kog
gihunahuna para sa iyang futurenya dili na diay madayon.”
(I was so sad because she is our only girl in the family. We should be together going shopping like
a mother and daughter should do. I am not happy, because as a parent there are a lot of things I
have imagines for our future and because of her homosexuality, it cannot be realized.)
Selected parents also question themselves for the homosexuality of their child. A 51-year-old parent of
three bisexuals phrased that,
“Tungod sa tulo kabuok ang bisexual, nakapangutana ko dili ba genetic disorder sa side sa iyang
Daddy. Even injecting the words of God kay dili madala so puros makasasala- worst case.”
(Because of my three bisexual children, I was able to ask if it is indeed genetic disorder in the part
of the Daddy. Even injecting the words of God, it cannot be helped. This is the worst case.)
Thoughts of acceptance but with reservation were also present among some parents. A 66 year old
mother of a transgender said,
“Dawatun nalang kay bisag di ko kadawat wala naman sad tay mahimo. Okay ra untag bayot siya
pero kanang dili mag usab og sinina or magpailis og totoy. Ambisyoso kaayo na ang magpausab.”
(I’ll just accept him even though in the first place I cannot accept him. It is fine if he’s a gay and
doesn’t cross-dress but if he tries to implant some breast, I think it is way too ambitious.)
Apparently, some parents believed that their child is going through an identity crisis and even believed to
the extent that there is a chance that they could be heterosexual again. Citing a father respondent of a
gay,
“Murag naa man sad siyay chance nga mausab pa.”
(I think there’s a slight chance that he will be changed.)
However, some parents cannot accept the fact. Mentioning a 65-year old mother of a gay,
“Wala nako dawata kay siya ramay anak nga bayot.”
(I cannot accept him because he is the only homosexual child I have.)
This has even gone to the extent that a father of a transgender went to different albularyos and spiritual
healings just to cure the homosexuality of his son saying,
“Daghan kog giduol nga tambalan/spiritual kay basin maulian pa siya.”
(I went to different albularyos and spiritual healings, hoping that he will become straight again.)
Emotional reaction. In describing the respondent’s feeling upon their child’s disclosure, there was
a variety of emotions felt, both negative and positive plus a neutral feeling. The wide range of feelings
observed are as follows: (a) acceptance, (b) happiness, (c) relief, (d) forced acceptance, (e) confusion, (f)
shock, (g) controlling, (h) sadness, (i) worry, (j) loss, (k) anger, (l) disgust, and (m) despise.
A lot of the respondents were surprisingly neutral upon the disclosure of their homosexual children, but it
depends on the reason. One respondent felt neutral because she already knew even before the child
disclosed her sexual identity. However, another respondent did not feel the need to disagree or agree with
her child not because she is neutral but because she is still hoping that there is still a chance that her
child will be a straight woman. These were her words,
“Wala raman, kay feeling nako naa pay chance mababay.”
(I don’t feel anything because I feel that there is still a chance for her to be straight.)
Furthermore, respondents felt positive emotions upon the disclosure of their child such as being accepting
of the sexual identity of the child. One respondent proved this with her words,
“I need to accept the fact that he is what he is and normal ra nga feelings. They are lovable and
charming, witty, smart and good in speaking”
(I need to accept the fact that he is what he is, and it is a normal feeling. They are lovable,
charming, witty, smart, and good in speaking.).
Another respondent added a positive note,
“Wala raman, di man jud ko ganahan mubalakid sa iyang kalipay basta tarong lang siya okay rajud
anang bayot siya.”
(It’s okay because I really don’t want to be a hindrance of his happiness. As long as he is a good
person, it’s okay for him to be gay)
Continuing the positive feelings, some were happy for their child’s sexual identity. One respondent was
happy because for her, she already has a second daughter. Some respondents were also fine about the
disclosure because she already saw her child growing up to be gay. One respondent even felt relieved and
in her own words she said,
“It became a relief nga naay relationship nga babae kay tungod dili na mamabdos balik.”
(It became a relief that she is in a same sex relationship for the the reason that she may not get
pregnant again).
Despite of the positive feelings some respondents felt, there were others who accepted the sexual identity
of their child because they cannot do anything about it anymore. One respondent said,
“Wala natay mahimo. Mao mana ilaha.”

(We can’t do anything about it. That’s how they are.)
For some, they were confused upon the child’s disclosure especially with a bisexual child and the
relationship dynamic he has. On the words of one respondent,
“Galibog jud kog maayo niya kay iyang barkada bayot pero iyang uyab kay babay. Feel nako dli
normal man gud nga straight nga lalaki nya mukuyog og bayot.”
(I’m very confused because his peers are gays but his has a girlfriend. I think it is not normal for
a straight guy to go with a gay.)
Besides being confused, some respondents were shocked especially if it is unexpected of the child to be
a homosexual. One respondent, for an instance, did not know that her child is in a romantic relationship
with the same sex. In her words,
“Nakalitan ko oy labi na pagdala niyag babay sa amo.”
(I was shocked especially when she brought a girl in our home)
Some stopped their child from coming out like what one respondent did.
“Ako ingnon nga ayaw pagbinayot kay mas maayo ang lalaki kay maminyo. Gamita ang utok
bahala ug mag uyab uyab.”
(I told him not to be gay because it is better to be a married man. Use your brain even if you’ll enter
a relationship).
Moreover, other respondents felt sad of their child’s disclosure because they can’t accept their sexual
identity. On the words of one respondent,
“Nakahilak ko kay wala jud ko kadawat. Pero karun wala naman ko gamahay nga na in ana siya.”
(I cried because I could not accept him but now, I don’t regret who he has become.)
Some respondents were worried about their child’s future especially if the child is uneducated and scared
of what other people might do to them. One respondent shared her sentiment,
“Bayot naman jud siya so maninguha lang jud nga dili magpatunto.”
(He is gay, so he has to make sure that he won’t be taken advantage of by other people.)
Additionally, respondents felt that the disclosure of their child was a loss because they believed that their
child could have been more. One respondent said,
“Gusto ko mausab nga malalaki kay sayang ang nawng. Nakadawat na ko kay kahibaw man
mangwarta.”
(I want him to be a man because he could have made use of his physical appearance. However, I
accept him now because he knows how to make money.”
Another respondent added,
“Naanugunan ko kay sayang dili maka anak, dili maminyo.”
(He could have have children but now he can’t be married, it’s a loss.)
Because of the child’s disclosure, some respondents got angry, disgusted, and detested the child’s sexual
identity. In the words of one respondent,
“Naglagot ko kay wala man ko katuo nga bayot jud siya.”

(I was angry because I didn’t know that he was gay.)
Another respondent was disgusted when her child told her that has an extra-marital affair with a woman.
In her own words, she stated,
“Giluod kay naa man gud siyay bana. Unya unta ang bana kay ideal man, buotan ug nindot ug
trabaho. Justification lang iya ug extramarital affairs kay unta kung naay problema pwede ra
masturyaan.”
(I was really disgusted because she has a husband who was and ideal man, kind, and has a good
job. It’s just her justification for the extra-marital affair because if there was a problem, it can still
be talked about.)
The same respondent expressed her despise and feeling of loss with her daughter’s disclosure of sexual
identity.
“Dili ko kadawat pero daghan man nitambag nako nga dili na sila sayop or sala kay nafeel raman
na nila. Naglagot ko kay sayang kaayo iyang pagkababay kay gwapa siya. Puhunan na niya.”
(I can’t accept but a lot of people adviced me that it isn’t wrong or a sin because that is how they
feel. I am angry because she wasted her beauty and identity as a woman. It was her asset.).
Locus of Causality of Child’s Gender Identity
Perceived reasons for the child’s gender identity is themed according to it being internal or external. For
some respondents, the reason for their child’s homosexuality is due to external factors such as (a) the
environment, (b) perceived models, (c) peers, (d) parenting style, and (e) being it God-given. Internal
reasons are attributed to it being (a) inherited and (b) the child’s own choice.
For some respondents, the reason for their child’s homosexuality is due to external factors such as the
environment and perceived models. In the words of one respondent,
“Halos lalake tanan sa balay kay lalake iyang mga manghod. Nya basin sad sa iyang school. Dili
sad siguro sa genetics kay wala may bayot or tombay sa among kaliwat ug basin siguro jud sa
iyang friends.”
(In our house, her younger siblings are all males and maybe it is also because of her school. It’s
not also genetics because no one in our relatives is gay or lesbian. Maybe it is also because of
her friends.)
Another external factor for their child’s homosexuality is the exposure to media content such as in
television shows.
Peers who are always with the child while growing up were also considered to have contributed to the
child’s sexual identity. One respondent said,
“Ang iyang kababata kay puros babae. Mas komportable siya didto sa babae nga iyang feeling
napareha.”
(His childhood friends were all females. He is more comfortable with them that’s why his feelings
were likened to them)
Peers even from early childhood days were believed to have influence the child’s feelings and sexual
identity. One respondent added that maybe it is because of the way they parented their child. Her words
were,
“Basin sa pagpadako na kay sugtan raman namo siya nga makigduwa sa mga babae sauna. Basin
sad choice na nila sila ray kahibaw.”
(Maybe it is because of our parenting style because we just allow him to play with girls before. It
is may also be their choice, only them know)
Lastly, there were two respondents who said that their child’s homosexuality was because God wanted it
to happen. One of the respondent said that it was the will of God. The other one on the other hand, said,
“Gipangayo man nako sa Ginoo nga naa koy anak nga babay or bayot.”
(I asked God to give a girl or a gay child)
On the other hand, internal factors include inheritance and the child’s own decision making. Inheritance
as one identified reason for the child’s homosexuality is one of the most mentioned responses. Most
respondents have a relative who is a homosexual and they are attributing their child’s homosexuality with
this. One respondent said that they have a bisexual grandparent who may have passed the gene on to the
next generations.
With regards to homosexuality as the child’s own choice in life, one respondent said that her child told her
that he did not like girls because they are flirtatious. Another respondent thought that it is how they really
feel.
Change on experiences of parents on post-confirmation
Change in personal feelings towards the child. A question was asked whether their feelings
change from their initial reaction upon knowing the homosexuality of their child. Majority of the parents
that were interviewed disclosed that their feelings did not change, with 43 that answered No, and the rest
presented that there was a change. As for the reason why the parents perceived that there was no
transition, two themes emerged: (1) automatic acceptance and (2) confusion still exists.
The first one was primarily because they automatically accepted the identity of their child and/or children.
A 52-year-old female parent added,

“Dawat najud na siya dae, dili man sad siya same sa uban nga murampa jud. Muchoreo lang siya.
Dili lang siya magpakita namo.”
(He is already accepted, he is unlike others that goes out. He choreographs though he doesn’t
show that to us.)
However, a 55-year-old mother had an opposite sentiment why there was no change of feelings,
“Kay naa gihapon siya para nako.”
(The (confusion) is still there.)
As for those remaining respondents who admitted that there was change, the primary response boils
down to the parents who had difficulty of accepting the homosexuality of their child and slowly accepting
it through time. There was an initial reaction of being mad yet there was a shift of this feeling as time goes
by, with the words of 48-year-old mother,
“Naghinay-hinay nga mag move on unya pakigsturya sa bana”
(Slowly moving on and talking to my husband.)
To supplement this, another response by a 42-year-old mother goes,
“Lisod pud, amo nalang silang gisabot.Amo silang gipasabot nga unsa pud ang mga possible nga
mahitabo. Mas nalove na nako sila, kung masakitan sila masakitan pud ko.”
(It is difficult, we understand them. We let them understand what are the possible things that could
happen. I loved them more, if they get hurt, I get hurt as well.)
Another reasoning by a few parents can be summed up by a response of 46-year-old mother,
“Nasuko unta pero dili man mausab”
(I was supposedly angry, but it cannot be changed.)
The answer of one-51-year-old female respondent can be due to the family circumstances embedded
into their situation which is why the factor of respect gets affected,
“Nawala na ang respect pero pinangga gihapon. Wala koy support sa couple, pero kung sa bana
unta.”
(The respect is not there however, I still care. I do not have support to the couple, but if it is for the
husband, I would.)
Change in parent-child relationship. The possibility of how the homosexuality affected the
relationship of parent and child was looked into as well. 42 parents said it did not affect their relationship
while the rest did. Those parents who answered yes gave out elaboration of their answers wherein two
themes were observed which can have: (1) positive effect or (2) negative effect. Some had a positive effect
with regards to the parents’ closeness after knowing their child’s homosexuality.
A 42-year-old female respondent expressed,
“Mas nagkaclose. Gitambagan jud nako siya nga dapat muskwelag tarung kay ang tomboy humot
kung naay trabaho.”
(We become closer. I advised her that she should study well for a lesbian is doing good when she
has a job.)
Another 42-year-old mother shared how they got closer with her child,
“Mas nagkaclose. Kintahay broken hearted siya nya nadepress kay ako sang damayan. Kay close
kaayo nga uyab. Niundang siya og skwela nya gipabalik.”
(We got closer. For example, she is brokenhearted and depress, I will be there for her. Her partner
before was so close to her to the point that she quitted school and I made her attend school again.)
The other theme of responses is on the negative impact of knowing the homosexuality. It targeted how
the parent would relate to the child and this created a gap between the parent and the child. A statement
by a 46-year-old mother towards her lesbian child speaks to this,
“Ako na siyang ingnan nga ayaw pagtomboy-tomboy kay wala kay angay”
(I told her do not be a lesbian because it does not suit you.)
A mother of a bisexual who is 51 years old cited a different way how this can be expressed,
“Cold treatment especially katong gibyaan na niya ang bana kay nikuyog sa babae”
(There is cold treatment especially when she left her husband and go with a girl)
There are given situations as well that change of appearance was a factor, a 53-year-old mother about
her lesbian child said,
“Dili ko ganahan, mao murag nalayo siya nako kay mabag-uhan nata sa tupi ba.”
(I do not like it, I think that is why she became distant because her I find her haircut unusual.)
Few responses pointed out how the parents’ reaction differed since there is already defiance of the child
given their disapproval of their identified sexuality. A 46-year-old female respondent disclosed,
“Kanang masinopakon siya nya dili jud mapugos.”

(She became disobedient which cannot be forced)
On the other hand, the difficulties encountered regarding on how it affected parent-child relationship
established three main points. First of all, is how to adjust on the attitude of the child. This is followed by
the external questions of others’ curiosity, where a 46-year-old mother shared,
“Yes, pag una kay daghan man kaayog tubag sa mga taw nga tomboy na siya? Daghan kaayog
isturya”
(Yes, at first because there are a lot of people questioning the gender of my child.)
Finally, is the expressed difficulty of recovering from the consequences of a child who is into a
relationship, with these words from a 51-year-old mother,
“Dugay ko nakarecover. Naa na siya 3rd attempt nga mag-suicide within sa relationship sa babae,
naa man pud siya bipolar”
(It was long before I recovered. She had attempted to commit suicide within her girl relationship.
She also has bipolar.)
Change in family closeness. Most respondents thought that their family closeness wasn’t
affected with the child’s disclosure of homosexuality but some noticed changes. These changes are as
follows: (a) restriction of the homosexual child, (b) isolation of the homosexual child, (c) closer family
relationship, and (d) happier family relationship.
Despite admitting that the family closeness wasn’t affected by the disclosure of their child, not everyone
in the family fully supports the coming out of the homosexual child. One respondent said that there was
no change in their family’s closeness except that the father does not support the child. If there are
arguments, they can easily fix it, one respondent said.
For those families whose closeness was affected, they cited instances of the effect of the disclosure to
the family. One respondent shared that they restricted the homosexual child from expressing himself, but
he threatened them that he will stop going to school, so they accepted him instead. Another respondent
said that the homosexual child was battered by the father when he came out and was not supported by
the siblings.
“Iyang papa dili man pod kadawat pag una. Nakulatahan mana siyapero mao man japon. Dawat
nalang. Iyang duha pod ka igsuon nga lalaki kay dli pod kadawat. Pero karun ok raman. Bsta
dlilang jud kanag lad-lad og bastos nga bayot kay silay makakkitag away. Mabugal-bugalan nya.”
(His father could not accept him at first. He was battered but in the long run he accepted him. His
two brothers also couldn’t accept him but now, everything is fine as long as he won’t come out as
a rude gay because his siblings will have to fight. He might be made fun by others).
Mostly in a family, the father usually is the one who cannot accept his homosexual child.
Another response was treating the homosexual child as an outcast in the family. One respondent openly
shared her personal opinion about the disclosure of her child.
”Dili i-apil kung naay celebration and nahimo nga outcast. Naa man na affected na 3 ka bata
involved. Why choose to change a normal family to a dysfunctional famiily?”
(She is ostracized if there is a celebration in the family which made her an outcast. Three children
were affected so why did she choose to change a normal family to a dysfunctional family?)
Despite most families being negatively affected by the disclosure of the child, there are some families who
are benefitting from it. A respondent said that their family is closer now compared before. She said,
“Kaayo jud kay mas close na siya sa mga manghod kay eldest biya siya nako. Iyang papa okay
raman sad so wala ray problema.”
(Very much because she is closer to her siblings as she is the eldest. Her father is also okay with
the idea so there’s no problem).
Another respondent also said that it’s funnier and happier now inside their home.
Change of perception of own self as a parent. In terms of the parent’s self-view upon knowledge,
the following are the categories set upon for the responses given by the parents, (a) no change, (b)
questioning of the parenting style, (c) feelings of shame upon self and (d) change of view. Most of the
parents expressed that there was no change in their own view on themselves. They believed that their
child's homosexuality is not in there hands but in the feelings of an individual. Citing from a 72 year old
mother of a gay and a 65 year old father of a transgender respectively,
" Wala man koy gibuhat nga ma-in ana siya."
(I did not do anything for him to be like that.)
"Iya naman jud na, daan naman pagkabata"
(It's innate in her, ever since.")
On the other hand, for those parents who had a shift in their own personal view expressed that they had
questioned their parenting ways and blamed it for the change of sexuality of their own child. As what a
51-year-old mother of a bisexual said,
"I had questions on where did I go wrong especially na akong parenting style kay I trust them,
maybe am I too lenient? I don't want to carry this on sa uban labi na sa akong anak na Grade 12
run"
(I had questions on where did I go wrong especially in my own parenting style because I trust
them, maybe I'm too lenient? I don't wanna carry this on my remaining children especially to my
Grade 12 child.)
But this does not only extend to the questioning of their own parenting style but up to the extent of feeling
ashamed of themselves because of their child's homosexuality, quoting from a 66 year old mother of a
transgender:
" Oo nausab, I'm not proud. Mauwaw ko"
(Yes, it has changed. I'm not proud, I'm ashamed.)
However, realizations were also noted in the change of self-view of homosexual parents. There was one,
who said that:

"Yes, dili ko angay mudiscriminate sa usa ka taw sa iyang gipili."
(Yes, it has changed. I should not discriminate a person's choice (his/her own gender)
Parental Adjustments of Parents and their Coping Strategies
Some of the parents claimed that there were indeed adjustments made in order to cater the changes that
are occurring in their child. Providing advises and limitations to their child were one of the most common
way to adjust to their homosexual child. As one the respondents said,
“Sturyahan siya nga dili pakita para dili mabugalbugalan ug gituman man sad.”
(I’d tell him not to be overt of his homosexual behaviour because some people might make fun of
him. Gladly, he followed my advice.)
Citing also from a 41- year old father of a lesbian,
“Reminder lang jud kay pwede masakitan kay tomboy sila. Kung tomboy ka, unya manguyab ug
babae. Maabot ang panahon na ang babae mangita ug lalaki.”
(Since she is a lesbian, she would definitely love a woman. I remind her that since she is in this
type of situation, she should be prepared that anytime, the woman she loves might leave her
because a woman will always find a man in the end.)
Relating above quoted, adjustments in terms of the sexual relationships that their child engaged to were
also noted. A mother of a 16-year-old lesbian was once so furious about the her child’s relationship with
a woman that it has extended to violence, quoting:
“Mugunit naman siyag kutsilyo para sa babay. Musukol siya kay suko kaayo siya nga nganong
dili mi kadawat. Willing na siya mupatay og taw. “
(She would carry a knife just to fight for her love for the woman. She was so angry at us because
we could not accept the relationship. She was more willing to kill a person for the relationship.)
The same case was also noted from a mother of a transgender who tried to commit suicide because of
her first heart break from her boyfriend.
Because of this of fear, some parents opt to be more open of their child’s relationship than seeing their
child becoming rebellious. One of the mothers of gay said that,

“Kanang nag ipon naman sila sa lalaki nya kung muanha sa balay kay dawtun nalang pud murag
anak”
(Since my child and his boyfriend are living in together, when his boyfriend comes and visits the
house, I welcome him and treat him also as my child.)
Aside from the adjustments in terms of love affairs that their child gets into, changes in the family
dynamics were also recorded to cater the homosexual child, especially on the father’s side. Referring to
the 70-year-old mother of a gay,
“Galisod kog adjust kay mahimo man namong away sa iyang Tatay, kay masuko man iyang tatay
nga muapprove ko nga siya in ana. Naay adjustments. giignan nako siya lang nga ayaw
pagbinabay nga sulob.”
(I had a hard time adjusting since this has become of the reasons why we quarrel with my
husband. Hy husband thinks that I was so considerate of him becoming a gay, but I told my child
that it’s okay, as long as he doesn’t change the way he dresses.)
In addition, adjustment in terms of physical manifestations (e.g. make-ups and clothing) were also
included. Some of the parents were already supportive of the physical changes but a few were not. Giving
an insight from a mother of a 25-year-old gay who doesn’t allow cross dressing,
“Na-awkwardan kay lalaki man siya unya magbinabaye. Gi-deny namo pag-una. Nadawat na
namo ayaw lang mi pakit-a magsul-ob siya ug binabaye kay makapatay unya mi. Dapat be
professional.”
(It is awkward when you know that he is a man and she is acting like a woman. At first, we chose
to deny it, yet we have accepted it now except for one condition, she will not cross-dress or we
could possibly kill him if he does. He should still be professional.)
Contrary to the preceding statement, this mother of a gay has supported such changes.
“Niadjust na lang, pasagdaan tagaan ug lipstick.”
(I opt to adjust, I even give him lipsticks.)
Adjusting socially was also one of the mechanism adapted by parents to adjust. One of the parents said,
“Kay naa may lisod nga butang nga makalitan ka. Nya naa poy mga taw nga mujudge nimo, naay
manglibak.”
“There are things that are difficult to grasp. There are people who judges you and talks behind
your back just because your child is a gay.”
Abovementioned adjustments were gearing to acceptance but one of the parents was referring to a
different adjustment not gearing towards acceptance. She said,
“Dili nako ma love, ma-feel nila nga dili pinangga kay dili pa man madawat. Muana ko nga: It is
not biblical they become rebellious as a child, they choose their own path”
“I cannot love them, I know they will feel that I do not care and accept them. It tells them, it is not
biblical they become rebellious as a child, they choose their own path.”
Yet, majority of the parents believed that there were no adjustments on their part to be able to fully accept
the sexuality of their child. Being aware of their child’s sexuality at a very early age is one of the reasons
mentioned as to why there were no adjustments. According to a 50-year old mother of a gay,
“Wala kay bata pa siya nakahibaw naman ko. Pangbabae na mag-ilis.”
(I did not have any adjustments because ever since he was a child, he would dress up as a girl.)
Another reason cited by the respondents of their absence of adjustment is their choice to be blind of the
changes that is occurring in their child. Mentioning the statement of a 72-year-old father of a gay,
“Dili nalang ko manghilabot sa iyang mga lihok kay mao naman jud na kay in ana naman siya.”
(I wouldn’t bother his behaviour, it is his own discretion.)
Social support. Most respondents did not utilize any social support on their road to acceptance
because they have accepted it by themselves. For the select few who used social support, most social
support came from (a) family, (b) friends and (c) seeking professional help. When asked if she had utilized
any social support, the respondent said,
“Oo jud, sus pila ka taw akong gisturyaan about ani kay di man makaya ako ra. Naa man jud koy
mga kaila nga naa sad anak nga tomboy nya sa akong mga igsuon sad.”
(Yes, I have talked to a lot of people regarding this because I couldn’t do it all by myself. I have
friends who also have lesbian children and I have sisters, too)
This shows that when the child discloses his/her sexual identity, parents usually go to close friends and
family members for advice, support, and someone to talk to.
However, one respondent said that when she talked to her sisters about the disclosure of her child, they
did not pay full attention. She even brought her daughter to a psychiatrist in an attempt to bring her back.
Gender Preference of the Parents for their Child
On the last part of the interview, respondents were asked what sexual orientation do they prefer more for
their if they are given the chance to choose. Only 18 of the respondents chose to have a homosexual child
with differing reasons such as (a) it is who they are, (b) the child is helpful, (c) there’s a benefit in who they
are, and (d) they don’t have a choice. On the other hand, respondents who preferred a heterosexual child
provided different reasons such as the possibility of (a) getting married, (b) having a family, (c) having
grandchildren, (d) sticking to religious beliefs (i.e. homosexuality as a sin and that one cannot change
what has been given), (e) society’s reactions, and (f) losing the heterosexual dream. Only 18 of the
respondents chose to have a homosexual child with differing reasons. Most of them chose to have a
homosexual child, referring to their own, because they believe that it’s who they are and as parents, they
have already accepted them. One respondent said that if she were to choose, she’d choose what her child
would choose, to be gay, and it’s no problem with her. Another respondent said that as a parent, she can’t
decide for her child and being gay is really who he is. Other reasons would be because their child did good
such as helping the family financially, doing household chores, and supporting younger siblings in their
studies.
Other respondents viewed the homosexuality of their child in a different way, changing the narrative and
placing it in a light note. Some of their responses were “dili problema nga makapaanak sila”, “ug lake
mangita ug patay”, and “basin ug na lalake nagsige ug lakwatsa”.
However, there were respondents who preferred a homosexual child only because they don’t have a
choice. On the words of one respondent, “wala may mahimo” as she explained why she preferred a
homosexual child.
On the other hand, most of the respondents, 41 of them, preferred a heterosexual child. Family-related
reasons such as getting married, having a family, and the idea of having grandchildren were the most
common response. One respondent said,
“Mas nindot malalake kay maminyo ug nay pamilya. Luoy kayo simbako matiguwang nga siya ra
usa”
(Being a man is better because he can get married and have a family. It’s pitiful to see if they grow
old alone.)
In terms of having a grandchild, one respondent said,
“Para naa pud koy apo oy”
(For me to have a grandchild)
The holy scriptures or the bible is also one of the reasons of choosing heterosexuality over the other. The
respondents believe that what God made is the only absolute thing in this world. They often backup their
responses with what the bible says. One respondent said,
“Kay niingun man ang Ginoo nga ang babay para sa lalaki nya ang lalaki para sa babay”
(Because God said that a woman is for a man, and a man is for a woman)
Additionally, they also believe that homosexuality is a sin and it is hated by God. As the words of one
respondent goes,
“With how God decides us, hate sa Ginoo ang homosexuality. As a parent, kinsay ganahan naay
ing-ana na anak. I support because that's where they are happy”
(In the judgment of God, he hates homosexuality. As a parent, who would like to have a
homosexual child? I only supported because that’s where they are happy)
Lastly, another respondent preferred her child to be heterosexual because she believes that her lesbian
child is born a woman and she can’t change that fact.
Another reason is the societal aspect of having a homosexual child such as comments from other people
and job opportunities for the homosexual child. One respondent explained,
“Ganahan unta kay ang uban magtan-aw daghan kaayo ug pangutana. Mao na para walay daghan
sturya”
(I would really like to because other people keeps on asking a lot of questions. To avoid being
asked, that’s why I want a straight child)
Another respondent shared that gays will have a hard time fitting into society as they face discriminative
acts that will hinder them from the possibilities of being accepted. He stated,
“Kay isip in ana sila. Mabugal bugalan sila nya maglisod pod silag pangitag trabaho labi nang
walay kurso nahuman. Knsa may mudawat og bayot”
(For people like them, they are going to be made fun of other people and they will also have a hard
time finding a job especially if they don’t have a degree. Who will accept a gay?)
Two of the respondents preferred heterosexuality because they feel that it is a great loss that their child
became homosexuals. One respondent said, “Kay saying kayo ang kagwapo” (His handsome face is
useless) as she refers to her gay son. The other respondent felt the same way because her lesbian
daughter is the only daughter she has.
Moreover, one respondent preferred heterosexuality because she thinks that her son could still change.
“Kay iya paman nang mausab iyang pagkabayot”
(Because he can still change his sexuality)
Lastly, one respondent did not have any reason at all why she preferred having a heterosexual child over
a homosexual.
Predictors of Parental Acceptance
To begin with, the results cannot make any generalization to the parents of the LGBT community
since the study used snowball technique and is thus only applicable to the participating respondents.
Multiple regression analysis was conducted to identify significant predictors of parental
acceptance. Assumptions of linearity, normality, homoscedasticity, and multicollinearity were first
satisfied to proceed with the analysis. The assumptions of linearity and normality were not violated as
shown by the normal probability plot (see in Appendix C, Figure 2), wherein the collected data
approximated a straight line and a normal distribution (see in Appendix C, Figure 3). This suggests that
there is a linear relationship between parental acceptance and the possible predictor variables, which are
the following: level of social support, cognitive flexibility, preconceived notions, religiosity, heterosexist
bias, the gender of the parent, gender of the child, and locus of causality of homosexuality. In terms of
homoscedasticity, scatter plot approximated a rectangular shape (see in Appendix C, Figure 4) which
suggested that the dependent variable, parental acceptance has equal amounts of statistical variances
across the range of values of the independent variable. Table 5 (see in Appendix C) illustrates the tolerance
values which revealed that the assumptions that concerns multicollinearity were not violated, given the
values that were not close to zero. This extends the independence of the variables which serves as
possible predictors from each other.
Out of the eight initially proposed predictors, three factors namely, level of heterosexism, locus of
causality, and gender of the child were found to significantly predict parental acceptance p<.05. Other
variables including parent’s gender, level of social support, cognitive flexibility, religiosity and
preconceived notion were found to be statistically insignificant, p>.05 which signifies no correlation with
the dependent variable. Table 2 provides statistically significant predictors of parental acceptance.
Table 2
Predictors of Parental Acceptance Towards Homosexual Child
Predictors Unstandardized ß Standardized ß Sig.

1. Parent’s Gender 4.78 .170 .197
2. Social Support .255 -.230 .116
3. Cognitive Flexibility 0.40 -.192 .652
4. Religiosity .829 .192 .172
5. Heterosexism .298 -.389 .003*
6. Preconceived Notion .246 -.092 .462
7. Locus of Causality .573 -.092 .044*
8. Child’s Gender .303 .092 .049*
R2= .294, *p<.05
To present this in a regression equation,

Y Parental Acceptance = 3.894 + 0.573 X1 Locus of Causality+ 0.303 X2 Child’s Gender+ 0.298 X3 Heterosexism
Data analysis showed a multiple correlation coefficient of R=.542. This three-predictor model,
then, explained approximately 29% of the variance in parental acceptance while the rest can be attributed
to other factors, R2 = .294, F (8, 47) = 2.449, p < .05. Out of the three predictors, heterosexism was found
to be the biggest contributor accounting for 38.90% of parental acceptance.
Heterosexism. Results from this study demonstrated level of heterosexism as a significant
predictor of parental acceptance, p <.05. Along with other significant predictors, 38.90% of parental
acceptance can be explained by the level of heterosexism while the rest can be accounted for by the
remaining factors. Analysis also revealed a negative relationship between both factors. As the level of
heterosexism increases, the level of parental acceptance decreases. This supported the study’s
hypothesis along with underlying reasons why this variable influence parental acceptance upon the
homosexual child’s disclosure in line with the view of Goodrich and Gilbride (2010) that heterosexism is
the supposition that the heterosexual sets the standard and that they are the ideals who reflects
superiority in the society. Provided with the negative correlation, parents with high heterosexism bias are
more likely to not accept or reject their homosexual child upon disclosure compared to parents who have
a low heterosexism bias.
This can be traced back to the definition of heterosexuality that is based on the notion that it is
considered as normal and ideal (Dermer, Smith, & Barto, 2010, p. 327 as cited in Smith, 2004) that is, it is
the standard and they are the ideals that reflect superiority in the society. Even going back to the course
of history, prejudice is already recognized which roots from the assumption that identities belonging in
the homosexual spectrum are unnatural which receives the rejection and stigmatization that comes with
the non-heterosexual behaviors. Heterosexism ranks lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgenders as inferior
with regards to the various legal and civil rights, religious beliefs, educational system, and especially with
regards to social equality.
Heterosexism may be unnoticeable or obvious, from the blue and pink identification bracelets of
babies after birth, children’s books only reflecting straight male and female parents, violence, and
harassment especially in public places, to restricting public display of affections only for heterosexuals.
It might not be expressed outwardly but even in our unconscious, we already have certain prejudices.
Locus of Causality. Locus of Causality was also found to be a significant predictor of parental
acceptance, p< .05, accounting for 9.20% of parental acceptance. Independent sample t-test indicated a
significant difference with internal and external locus of causality, t (.270) = 4.564, p = .000. Parents who
externally attributed the cause the homosexuality of their child reported significantly higher level of
acceptance (M= 6.17, SD= 1.01) than those internally (M= 5.16, SD= 0.66). The results of the study cohere
with what the literature presented on how locus of causality plays as a predictor of parental acceptance
of child’s homosexuality (Haider-Merkel & Joslyn, 2008). A higher level of acceptance is expected for
those parents who regarded homosexuality as governed by an uncontrollable force rather than those that
see this as a choice in connection to the factor of locus of control. There is deemed higher responsibility
being put on in the case of internal locus of causality. There is always the question why an individual
turned out to be a homosexual when one can avoid being one provided the kind of stigma posed against
them. There is the perception that this can be reversed through their own will and control when it is due
to the acquisition of learning and personal choice. There is lower parental acceptance for they will be
evaluated more negatively and be faced with a low level of sympathy. When less homosexuality was
perceived as under the control of the individual, higher level of affection was demonstrated (Armesto &
Weisman, 2001); this is in the light of external attribution. External attribution extends to the notion that
homosexuality is innate and that we are bound to be predisposed to this tendency. A converse reaction
to the previous kind of locus of causality has shown where fury, anger, and negative emotions can be more
likely circumvented when attribution of the parents is placed on unmanageable factors, i.e. heredity and
inheritance and that this happens abruptly.
Child’s gender. Accordingly, 9.20% of the parental acceptance can also be explained by the child’s
gender p< .05. Among the four genders, parents of transgender reported the highest level of parental
acceptance (M=6.15, SD= 0.69), compared to Lesbians (M=5.11, SD= 1.18), Gays (M=5.95, SD= 0.74) and
Bisexuals (M=4.85.15, SD= 0.84) who consequently reported lowest. There is a significant difference in
the parental acceptance of Lesbians towards Gays, t (6.73) = .29, p = .004 and Transgender, t (3.62) = -
2.157 p = .043 but not with Bisexuals t (2.01) = .422, p = .650 . Furthermore, parents of Gays were
significantly different in terms of acceptance comparing it to Bisexuals t (.087) = 3.30, p = .005 but not on
Transgender t (0.381) = -0.64, p = .524. Between Transgender and Bisexuals, Transgender are more
accepted than Bisexuals t (0.023) = - 2.95, p = .015.
Results in accordance with these set respondents do not cohere to existing literature.
Contrary to the belief that transgenders were the most accepted subgroup (Australian Human Rights,
2013), parents of transgenders reported the highest acceptance among the three subgroups. Bisexual
being found as one the negatively viewed genders; also, have shown the least level of acceptance
according to the respondents. Between lesbians and gays, gays were more accepted by the parent
respondents. This can be explained by the fact that the parents interviewed for transgenders are very
closely linked. Parents were very open to the fact that they have a transgender parent therefore accepting
the change of physical appearance and behaviors. Gays were also found to be second to the accepted
gender identity. This is can be rooted well to the high concurrence of gay community. Among all the
genders, it can be drawn that the population of gays are at most, meaning that gays are highly socially
involved in the society (e.g. salons, pageants). Lesbians and bisexuals were found to be least accepted
across the four. In a very patriarchal society women are expected to care and nurture for the young while
men hold the privilege of power. With this being said, women trying to "act" as man are prejudiced to be
the minority who tries to steal the man dominated society. Bisexuals on the other are also titled to be the
confused identity, that is why people, parents in particular cannot readily accept the fact because they
believed that there is still a chance that their child will be heterosexual.
SUMMARY, CONCLUSION AND RECOMMENDATION
Summary
A total of 59 heterosexual parents with LGBT identified sons and daughters in their youth
were interviewed for this study from around Cebu which essentially has Cebu City at its capital where the
study was initially gauged. The study utilized a non-probabilistic sampling through the means of
convenient sampling. Therefore, generalizations cannot be made from the results. The study aimed to
discern the process of parental adjustment towards acceptance of LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and
Transgender) youth together with the proposed factors influencing this process. The results were as
follows:
▪ Parent’s conceptions of homosexuality, their locus of causalitys, cues for their child’s gender
identity, cognitive and emotional reactions upon confirmations of child’s gender identity, coping
strategies and gender identity preference were gathered through a qualitative data gathering
which presented these points
→ For the conceptions of homosexuality, the observed themes were as follows: (a) in reference
to the qualities of their own child, (b) approval of homosexuality but with reservations, (c)
being human like everyone else, (d) identity crisis and lastly, (e) religious explanations.
→ Four themes emerged: (a) inheritance, (b) environment, (c) abrupt and (d) do not know for the
locus of causality why people turn out to be homosexuals.
→ Parents have preconceived notions of their child’s gender identity even before the
confirmation. The following are the themes recognized across the responses, (a) deviation
from expected behaviors (e.g. activities, conduct and preference), (b) the type of relationship
their child gets in to and (c) the physical manifestations at birth.
→ Cues for identification of the child’s gender identity were as follows: (a) the child’s actions
whether it is feminine or masculine in nature, (b) the physical manifestations or expressions
of the child’s sexual identity, (c) having feelings towards the same sex, (d) having a romantic
relationship with the same sex, (e) peers, and (f) the physical appearance of the genitalia.
→ In terms of the parent’s thoughts upon confirmation of their child’s gender identity, the
following are the themes found for the responses given by the respondent, (a) neutrality of
feeling, (b) feelings of shock, worry, feeling of waste and anger, (c) questioning of the self as
a parent, (d) thoughts of acceptance with reservation, (e) the belief that their child is going
through an identity crisis and (e) non-acceptance.
→ In describing the respondent’s feeling upon their child’s disclosure, there was a variety of
emotions felt, negative and positive plus a neutral feeling. The wide range of feelings observed
are as follows: (a) acceptance, (b) happiness, (c) relief, (d) forced acceptance, (e) confusion,
(f) shock, (g) controlling, (h) sadness, (i) worry, (j) loss, (k) anger, (l) disgust, and (m) despise.
→ Different themes for the perceived reason of their child’s homosexuality were also observed
including: external factors such as (a) the environment, (b) perceived models, (c) peers, (d)
parenting style, and (e) being it God-given. Internal reasons are attributed to it being (a)
inherited and (b) the child’s own choice.
→ Majority of the parents that were interviewed disclosed that their feelings did not change.
However, for the parents who reported that there were changes, two themes emerged: (1)
automatic acceptance and (2) confusion still exists.
→ Most of the parents said that it did not affect their relationship but for Those parents who
answered yes gave out elaboration of their answers wherein two themes were observed which
can have: (1) positive effect or (2) negative effect.
→ Most respondents thought that their family closeness wasn’t affected with the child’s
disclosure of homosexuality but some noticed changes. These changes are as follows: (a)
restriction of the homosexual child, (b) isolation of the homosexual child, (c) closer family
relationship, and (d) happier family relationship.
→ Although many parents admitted that there self-view as a parent was not affected some
parent have said that there were indeed changes. The following are the categories set upon
for the responses given by the parents, (a) no change, (b) questioning of the parenting style,
(c) feelings of shame upon self and (d) change of view.

→ Most respondents did not utilize any social support on their road to acceptance because they
have accepted it by themselves. For the select few who used social support, most social
support came from (a) family, (b) friends and (c) seeking professional help.
→ Most of the respondents who preferred a heterosexual child provided different reasons such
as the possibility of (a) getting married, (b) having a family, (c) having grandchildren, (d)
sticking to religious beliefs (i.e. homosexuality as a sin and that one cannot change what has
been given), (e) society’s reactions, and (f) losing the heterosexual dream. On the other hand,
only 18 of the respondents chose to have a homosexual child with differing reasons such as
(a) it is who they are, (b) the child is helpful, (c) there’s a benefit in who they are, and (d) they
don’t have a choice.
▪ The descriptive statistics used to analyze the level of parental acceptance suggests that the
respondents of this study ha ad a high level of parental acceptance.
▪ Statistical analysis was conducted, significance level pegged at 0.05. Multiple regression analysis
was conducted to determine the significant predictors of the dependent variable which is parental
acceptance. It was found that parent’s gender, level of social support, cognitive flexibility,
religiosity and preconceived notion was found to be statistically insignificant, p>.05 which
signifies no correlation with the dependent variable considering the insufficient correlation value
of below .30.
▪ Out of the eight initially proposed predictors, three factors namely, level of heterosexism, locus of
causality and gender of the child were found to significantly predict parental acceptance p<.05.
▪ Heterosexism can explain 38.90% of parental acceptance while the rest can be accounted for by
the remaining factors.
▪ Locus of causality accounts for 9.20% of parental acceptance with significant difference between
internal and external locus of causality
▪ The child’s gender can explain 9.20% of the parental, p< .05. Among the four genders, parents of
transgender reported the highest level of parental acceptance (M=6.15, SD= 0.69).
Conclusion
In the case of the parents that served as respondents of this study, there are varied notions the
on the definition of homosexuals, with no clear-cut definition. This seems to suggest that homosexuality
as a sexual identity is not well-understood in the present which can be for the reason that it is a kind of
change that deviates from what is conventional. There are some respondents who claimed they already
accepted their child, however, their responses to other questions suggest otherwise. This affected the
relationship of their family, especially on the side of the fathers who resort to physical and/or verbal
violence to express their anger and fury on who their child turned out, which can be related to
heterosexism bias these fathers have. In their very homes, they experience hostility for the reason that
they are not accepted especially by their fathers in the case of this study’s participants.
Heterosexism bias can explain 38.90% of parental acceptance which is the strongest predictor
among the three that was found to be significant. Having a stronger heterosexism bias of parents
suggests a lower parental acceptance because of the belief of the superiority of the straight individuals
over those that claimed to be homosexuals. However, homosexuals nowadays strive to be successful
across all the sectors and prove that these notions can be debunked. Yet, this bias is primarily governed
by the unconscious which makes it even harder to discern. On the other hand, locus of causality and
gender of the child yielded a significant predictive value which has to be considered as well in looking into
parental acceptance.
The results of this study can aid in understanding what parents go through upon knowing their
child’s gender identity until the period of acceptance through time. Acceptance is what homosexuals
would want to have especially on their immediate family and most especially parents. These factors can
be targeted to spread awareness and appreciation on what it means to be homosexual against the issue
of stigmatization and isolation of these minorities. The results suggest as well that there is a need to
educate regarding the members of the LGBT in a wider scope for the people to go through orientations
not only for those who have the initiative to do so in order to clarify misconceptions about them. This
measure will not only aid the parents’ adjustments and acceptance, but it creates an impact on the well-
being of the entire LGBT community in its very essence.
Limitations of the Study
The researchers have found possible limitations of the study which could have possibly
affected the results of the study. Firstly, when fathers are invited to have the interview, rejections were
faced by the researchers having the reason that these fathers were still on the process of comprehending
and accepting their child’s identity. This study could have better represented parents’ adjustment and
acceptance if there is a balance between the number of mothers and father.
Moreover, parents could easily falsify their experiences in the process of accepting their
homosexual child. In one of the interviews conducted, the mother has confessed that when her son
admitted he was gay, the father has committed both a lot of physical and verbal abuses. However, when
the father was separately interviewed, he said that he had easily accepted the child.
Recommendations
To address the limitations of the study, the researchers formulated these recommendations:
1. More reliable instrument should be constructed to make sure that the instrument does measure
what it intends to measure for the factor of family functioning was not subjected to further
analysis because it was found to not pass the reliability coefficient.
2. In the future researches, the possible predictors that are utilized can be modified and the addition
of possible predictors can be done. This will contribute to the existing literature especially when
studies of parental acceptance of homosexuality in the country are insufficient.
3. To take into account the use of words such as “nalang” in the qualitative part which could denote
that parents have not really accepted the homosexuality of the child but have just tolerated the
behaviors of their child. Secondly, it is suggested that to interview at least one family member
aside from the interviewed parents to cross-analyze the answers to make sure that there was
indeed no physical and verbal abuse across the process.

4. This paper is highly limited in many aspects and conducting further studies and investigation will
be a great contribution to various researches in existence where parental adjustment and parental
acceptance are involved.

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PREDICTORS OF PARENTAL ACCEPTANCE 1

Background of the Study

Review of Related Literature

Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity and Expression

is the Parental Acceptance-Rejection Theory. It is an “evidence-based theory of socialization and lifespan

parents are neglecting, unaffectionate, or aggressive toward them.

physically as well as psychologically unresponsive or even unavailable or inaccessible.

is reflected on a third and independent dimension or continuum which is autonomy-granting and

supportive versus coercive, intrusive, and psychologically controlling parenting.

homosexuality of their child.

social support appears to be absent is lacking (Goodrich & Gilbride, 2010).

for their process of development.

tolerance across the LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) subgroups.

coping up with stressful and conflicting situations.

higher-order thinking, in moving from dogma to a self-directed thinking style.

heterosexual. Goodrich (2009) described preconceived notions as parents’ assumptions or perceptions

and adaptive ways (theistic mediation).

Religion is prevalently known in associating behaviors with homosexuality as ‘‘unnatural”,

and Leviticus 20:13 respectively;

intolerance (Wilcox, 1996; Regnerus and Smith, 1998).

focus on fostering a loving relationship;

rejection and stigmatization of the non-heterosexual behaviors, actions, and views.

of the parent within the realm of dynamics of the child’s family.

(Willoughby, Doty & Malik, 2008).

In relation to this, Weiner (1979,1985) presented another separate dimension, controllability

was under the adolescent’s control (Armesto & Weisman, 2001).

and guilt compared with mothers.

disclosure of sexual orientation to parent have an implication on the psychological well-being of

(Auerbach, Bigda-Peyton, Eberhart, Webb, & Ho, 2011).

process of working together” (Goodrich, 2009).

Statement of the Problem

acceptance is also looked into.

In relation to this, the researcher aims to answer the following questions:

1. What are the parents’ conceptions of homosexuality?

4. What is their locus of causality about their children’s gender identity?

a) Personal feelings towards the child

d) View of own self as a parent

7. How do parents cope upon confirmation of their child’s gender identity?

8. What is the level of acceptance of the respondents?

9. Which of the following variables are significant predictors of parental acceptance:

a) Level of Social Support

b) Gender of the Child

c) Gender of the Parent

i) Perceived Family Functioning

Figure 1. The relationship between predictor variables and parental acceptance

significant predictive value.

lesbians. Gays will have the highest level of acceptance.

orientation of their child can threaten the existing family functioning.

and/or relatives in looking for respondents.

that the subject of this study were minorities.

weigh which would reflect their heterosexism bias (α=0.814).

statements were observed.

cumulative period of around 3 weeks.

RESULTS AND DISCUSSION

significant predictors of parental acceptance.

Conceptions of Non-Conventional Gender Identity

“Okay na lang kay naay anak nga bayot”

(It is already okay because I have a gay child.)

reservations mirrored by the sentiments of one-64-year old mother,