1000 Years of Sexual Wisdom Ebook PDF
1000 Years of Sexual Wisdom Ebook PDF
1000 Years of Sexual Wisdom Ebook PDF
OF
SEXUAL WISDOM
By Karinna Kittles-Karsten
Copyright 2009
All rights reserved.
1000 Years of Sexual Wisdom
A Book by
Karinna Kittles-Karsten
Sex—it’s one of the most fascinating experiences in the world, a subject that has
intrigued men and women for thousands of years throughout history. I count myself
among those who are captivated by this powerful, intimate act, and I have journeyed the
my years as a top fashion model in some of the world’s most exciting and exotic
locations, including Italy, France, Spain, Germany, Thailand, Hong Kong, Japan,
Australia and New York. I reveled in the legendary romance of the European capitals and
became enchanted with the mystical cultures of the East. As a young romantic, I tumbled
in and out of love many times, always searching for deeper intimacy and more fulfilling
sex.
In this quest for more meaningful sexual intimacy, I began to study the sexual arts as
practiced by ancient cultures around the world. I drank in the sexual histories and rites of
China’s Tao of Love and India’s Tantra while voraciously consuming the mythical tales
of the gods and goddesses of ancient Greece and Rome and the chivalric romantic
sense of sexual freedom than we do today. They viewed sex as a completely natural,
nourishing act that should be performed often to improve one’s health and vitality. Even
more remarkable, when it came to sexual matters, several of these early civilizations
boasted more egalitarianism between the sexes than our own modern society. Both
women and men were equally free to initiate, engage in and enjoy the physical pleasures
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of copulation without double standards or feelings of guilt or shame.
I was completely enthralled and fascinated by these liberated views, but I found one
revelation even more compelling. I learned that the sexual beliefs of many of these
experience that was harmoniously linked to the divine, regardless of whether that took the
form of a god, a goddess, nature or the universe. In the eyes of the ancients, sex went far
beyond a few moments of physical pleasure shared between two people. This intimate
experience intricately connected a person to what was divinely meaningful to them and
infused a sense of one’s place in the grand scheme of life. This, I came to realize, is the
I had no idea at the time, but this introduction to “sacred sex and love” would eventually
become my life’s work. Now, after 20 years of studying and teaching ancient sexual
wisdom, I enjoy sharing amazingly beautiful, mysterious and secret intimate arts from
around the world with millions of people through my books, DVDs, media appearances
and speaking engagements. One of the most wonderful things about these ancient love
arts is that they can benefit all types of people, whether you’re straight or gay, an
adventurous single person developing your sexual repertoire or a married couple hoping
to reignite your passion and enhance your lovemaking. It gives me incredible pleasure to
turn people on to new ideas to enhance their most intimate relationship using the
traditions and practices of ancient cultures. And that’s what I hope to do for you with this
book.
In 1,000 Years of Sexual Wisdom, I will share many of these ancient sexual rituals from
around the globe which have been lost throughout the ages. (I must admit that some of
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these traditions date further into our ancient past than just 1,000 years.) When you tap
back into these timeless customs, you will find renewed relevance and meaning for your
sex life. You will also discover that reenacting or adapting age-old sexual rituals or
engaging in primeval lovemaking practices with your lover can add a lot of spice and
No doubt, you will be surprised to discover how exciting and relevant these ancient
sexual rites are for today’s adventurous lovers. And if you’re hoping to take your sexual
relationship and capacity for intimacy to the next level, you will uncover the keys for
doing so within the pages of this book. With this book, you can begin your own journey
Your quest for erotic knowledge will begin with the most ancient known texts on
intimacy and sexuality, China’s Tao of Love and India’s Tantra, both of which describe
arousing lovemaking rituals and sexual positions that can add variety and a new
dimension of intensity to any sexual encounter. Then you’ll journey to the Middle East
and Egypt where you’ll discover passionate and sensual temple rites that can be
Next, your sexual voyage will lead you West where you’ll be introduced to decadent
celebrations used in ancient Greece and Rome that can be adapted for a fun and
frolicking good time. Your sexual education wouldn’t be complete if you didn’t explore
the legendary romance and chivalry that defined Europe’s Middle Ages and that can
reignite your own desire. Your world tour will also take you back in time to experience
the nature-based sexual practices of the indigenous tribes of the Americas, which can lead
to more sexual magic in your own love life. Finally, you can be inspired by the age-old
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customs and modern practices of the world’s most sexually liberal region, the Nordic
countries.
The enticing sexual histories of these ancient civilizations are meant to inspire you, and
the real purpose of this book is to help you make these timeless ideas your own to
enhance intimate pleasure, revitalize sexual excitement and bring you closer to your lover
than you ever imagined. 1,000 Years of Sexual Wisdom is above all else a guided sacred
initiation that can lead you to a more exciting, connected and satisfying sex life. I hope
Karinna Kittles-Karsten
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Table of Contents
Chapter One
Enjoy Sex as Good Medicine with the Tao of Love from China ……………………………….. 7
Chapter Two
Delight Your Lover’s Divine Senses with the Tantra of India ……........................................... 30
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Unveil the Mysteries of Love with the Temple Rites of the Ancient Middle East………………76
Chapter Five
Enchant the Heart with the Romantic Chivalry of Medieval Europe………………………….. 101
Chapter Six
Create Fertile Fantasies Inspired by the Gods and Goddesses of the Mediterranean………...... 128
Chapter Seven
Bring Heaven and Earth into Your Bedroom with Shamanic Sex Ceremonies of the Americas 152
Chapter Eight
Conclusion
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Chapter One
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Intro
The civilization of ancient China that rose up amid misty sacred mountaintops and
blossoming peach trees more than 10,000 years ago, possesses one of the world’s richest
and most intriguing sexual histories. Its classic sexology system originated during the
Han Dynasty in 2 BC, a time of great medical discovery and social advances in ancient
China. Legend has it that the Yellow Emperor, known as the father of traditional Chinese
medicine, learned the secrets of healthy sex, pleasure-filled sex and sexual alchemy in a
captivating conversation with three Taoist female immortals. The sexual knowledge he
gained from these mystical women became the foundation of the Eastern world’s oldest
The Tao of Love graphically describes an intimate philosophy for love and lovemaking
China’s most famous philosophers, artisans, emperors, empresses and doctors wrote
about, quoted and lived by the Tao of Love, incorporating its potent lovemaking rituals
In ancient China, the Tao of Love was interpreted as a sort of prescription for healthy
living and became a legitimate branch of traditional Chinese medicine. In fact, ancient
Chinese doctors viewed sex as very good medicine and would routinely prescribe Taoist
erotic techniques and rituals to their patients to promote healing and longevity.
Another compelling sexual secret within the Tao of Love is yin yang role play. Yin and
yang are polar opposites, like fire and water, that exist within each man and woman. Yin
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is the feminine, cool, receptive quality that flows through a sexual partner and attracts a
luscious intimate encounter. Yang is the masculine, hot, pursuing, penetrating quality that
inspires a dynamic lover and sets a sexual encounter on fire. According to ancient
Chinese sexual canons, when yin and yang are dynamically at play during a sexual
While the Tao of Love provided many tantalizing sexual practices to the Chinese people,
none was more desirable than the potent sexual elixir that was believed to produce
supernatural state that would allow a person to move at will between earth and heaven.
The ancient Taoists, who viewed themselves as alchemists, created this erotic elixir by
using a variety of sexual techniques that would transform sexual energy into a refined
The notion of this powerful sexual elixir permeated ancient Chinese society. It is written
that the Yellow Emperor delighted in cultivating his sexual elixir based on what he had
learned from the beautiful female immortals and became an immortal himself. One of the
most famous alchemists in China, Ko Hung, wrote about a sexual elixir school in his
monumental 4th century work, Pao P’u Tzu. During the Ming dynasty, numerous texts
referred to this intriguing sexual elixir, revealing that many ancient Chinese people were
Although the Tao of Love is thousands of years old, it remains relevant and timely for
modern lovers. Take the Tao of Love’s prescriptions for sex as good medicine to
heighten your libido and increase sexual potency. With yin yang role play, you and your
lover can choose to ignite the fire for hot ecstatic sex or sink into each other’s arms for
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long, luxurious lovemaking any time you want. And like the ancient Taoist alchemists,
you can both enjoy creating your own sexual elixir for incredibly pleasure-filled multi-
orgasmic encounters.
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Sex as Good Medicine
History of Sex
The Tao of Love portrayed sex as good medicine—an erotic act that held great
regenerative powers. According to early Chinese medical canons, such as the Yang-
Sheng Fang (Prescriptions for Nurturing Life), making love in certain positions and
using specific sexual stroking methods could produce healing effects. The belief in the
medicinal power of sexual activity was so strong that ancient Chinese doctors routinely
prescribed copulation as a remedy for all kinds of conditions and diseases, including
sexual problems.
For example, a man might be instructed to have sex with a woman lying on her side but
with her hips tilted upward in order to cure premature ejaculation. A tonic for female
reproductive organs included making love with the woman on her back with her legs and
arms wrapped around her lover’s waist while she circulated her body in both clockwise
The Taoists also believed that engaging in hot sexual activity could actually rejuvenate
the body, creating a more youthful and vibrant appearance. In essence, the more times a
person made love, the younger they would look and feel, and the longer they would live.
You can give your own sex life a healthy boost with a modern adaptation of sex as good
medicine. Borrowing from the practices of the Tao of Love, you and your lover can
experiment with new and exciting sexual positions and steamy sexual techniques that are
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“Those who practice (sexual union with only up to two ejaculations a month) live for
200 years, maintain their youthful color, and are without illness.”
Fortunately, you don’t need a prescription from an ancient Chinese doctor to engage in
sex as good medicine. You and your lover can inject healthy lovemaking into your daily
lives by trying some of the healing sexual positions and stimulating techniques described
in the Tao of Love. Get your erotic evening off to a healthful start with a sexy tonic made
from arousing Chinese herbs. Considering that these herbs are designed to intensify
desire and strengthen virility, you can be sure that a dose of this “medicine” will make
you and your lover feel more sexually alive than ever.
A number of erotic Chinese herbs have been used for thousands of years to enhance
sexual potency and ignite the sex drive. These herbs are considered by some to be an
ancient, natural answer to that little blue pill, Viagra. Chinese herbs that are known for
increasing libido include horny goat weed, ginseng and gingko biloba. Horny goat weed
increases levels of nitric oxide, an element that’s essential for achieving an erection.
Ginseng pumps up your stamina, which can help keep you both going strong for those
marathon sexcapades, and improves blood flow to the genitals, which is also necessary
for full arousal in men. Gingko biloba is yet another Chinese herb that improves blood
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You can find these common Chinese herbs in many retail locations or online stores where
vitamins and supplements are sold. For more information on the mysteries of these sexual
aids, visit a Chinese herbalist who can give you a prescription for potent herbs that can
lead to a boost in your sexual arousal and more abundant sexual ecstasy. Be aware,
however, that if you have certain medical conditions, it may not be safe to take some
Chinese herbs. Consult with your doctor to see if Chinese herbs are right for you. If not,
you can still take pleasure in sex as good medicine, just leave out the herbs and focus on
the sex.
Using your erotic enhancing Chinese herbs, concoct a sex tonic that you and your lover
can sip seductively before making love. Your stimulating potion doesn’t have to taste like
medicine to improve your sex life. Blend and swirl these arousing herbs into a delicious
Chinese tea that’s known for its healing powers, such as green tea or white tea. For a
more exotic flavor, try an aromatic tea, such as jasmine, Moroccan mint or ginger. To
prepare your arousing brew, pour hot—not boiling—water into a teapot and steep the tea
for three to four minutes. Add your libido-enhancing herbs and serve in teacups or mugs.
Since the ancient Chinese were famed throughout the world for their elaborate tea
ceremonies, you may want to create your own sex tonic ceremony. Slip into sumptuous
silk robes, light candles and sit across from each other on luscious-colored pillows for
this intimate occasion. Creating a sensuous ceremonial atmosphere for drinking your sexy
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tonic can help you get into the mood for erotic ancient Taoist-style sex. Whisper enticing
and loving words to each other as you prepare your delicious sexual stimulant. Go bare
under your robe, tying it loosely so your lover can catch glimpses of your beautiful nude
body beneath.
When your sex tonic is ready, let it cool slightly. Looking into each other’s eyes, bow to
each other and then take your first sip simultaneously. Savor the sexual refresher slowly.
Breathe in the steam from the liquid, letting it warm and moisten your lips and nose.
Open up your robe and hold the warm teacup near your erogenous zones so you can feel
the sacred mist licking your luscious skin. Sip slowly, relishing the heat of the tonic in
your mouth. You may even want to take a sip, hold it in your mouth for a moment and
then kiss your lover to share a sensually warm kiss. When you’re down to the last drop of
your tonic, pour it into your lover’s open mouth, and then lick their lips deliciously.
As the Chinese herbs take their effect, you will probably be filled with desire for each
other. When you’re both sufficiently aroused, try some of the healing sexual positions
and steamy techniques from the Tao of Love, such as this libido booster and orgasmic
wonder position that can improve male sexual issues, such as impotence and premature
ejaculation. Women, lie on your side and twist your hips so your pelvis is facing upward
and your knees are spread apart. Men, straddle her on your hands and knees and enter
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While your penis is inside her, use the secret Taoist stroking method of shallow and deep
strokes called “Sets of Nine.” For the first set of nine strokes, use only shallow strokes.
Then penetrate the vagina deeply one time. Next, penetrate with two blissfully deep
strokes followed by eight teasingly shallow strokes. For the following set of nine, do
three deep strokes and then seven shallow ones. Keep adding deep penetrations and
subtracting shallow strokes until you get to nine deep thrusts and one shallow. Counting
your strokes and alternating between shallow and deep strokes can help you delay
ejaculation, while the changes in depth of penetration can add to her pleasure. According
to Taoist beliefs, this hot stroking method also channels health to the organs of the body,
With your increased stamina thanks to your sex tonic, you can extend your lovemaking
session by changing positions. The following Taoist sexual toning position not only
provides for long-lasting intercourse but also improves blood circulation for her, which
can aid in healing headaches (a common excuse for not having sex) and preventing
menstrual cramps.
To perform this sexy move, men, roll over onto your back while she lies on one side of
you with her leg thrown over your waist and her vagina above your penis. Women,
support yourself on one elbow with your hand under his head. Take his penis in your
other hand and guide it in to penetrate your vagina halfway. Maintain a hold on his penis
as you rotate your pelvis so that his shaft comes in contact with your clitoris. Women,
circulate your pelvis slowly in a clockwise and then counterclockwise direction. Each
circulation massages and stimulates the vagina and clitoris, sending waves of energy and
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While rotating in this way, you will both feel irresistible stimulation, which can bring you
to ecstatic heights. After she has been satisfied, men, return to the Taoist secret nine-set
stroking method for a rejuvenating and blissful sexual encounter for you both.
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Yin Yang Role Play
History of Sex
Some of the most arousing sexual techniques described in the Tao of Love teachings
involve yin yang role play. According to the ancient Chinese, the yin is associated with
attributes include heat, assertiveness, hardness, expansion, light and fire. In a sexual
encounter, the ancient Taoists called upon the yang to supply the heat for passionate
lovemaking and turned to the yin to cool their fevered pace in favor of a more unhurried,
relaxed and sumptuous lovemaking session. According to the ancient Chinese texts, such
as The Classic of the Elemental Maid, when yin and yang act harmoniously and
Like the ancient Taoists did thousands of years ago, you and your lover can use the
powers of yin and yang role play to add a fun, new dimension to your sex life. Like fire
and ice, you can heat up your sexual chemistry to ignite your lover’s desire or cool your
lover with a soothing seduction so you can both savor foreplay and lovemaking.
You and your lover can use role play to call upon the captivating powers of both the yin
and the yang to create tantalizing sexual encounters. When you include the coolly sensual
elements and attributes of the yin along with the hot arousing elements and attributes of
the yang during foreplay, you build sexual tension and intensify your pleasure. And by
taking turns assuming the yin and the yang roles as you make love, you will experience
your lovemaking from a whole new perspective. Even if you’ve been with the same lover
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for twenty years, sex that may have seemed familiar and routine in the past will feel
Tease the senses and increase stimulation with yin and yang elements during foreplay.
Cooling yin-related items you may want to use for this passionate prelude to sex include
ice cubes and cool creams. Fiery yang-related items that will heat up your lover include
cinnamon mints and hot natural candle wax. Turn down the lights and start burning some
natural emollient candles that give off a sexy and romantic fragrance. Burn the candles in
the bedroom to help create a sensual scene, and so you’ll have candle wax (appropriate
for massage) nearby to drizzle on your lover. Bring the other fiery and cooling elements
For this sensual and arousing yin yang lead-in to sex, shed any clothing and approach
your lover in the nude. Whoever makes the first move in foreplay has taken on the yang
role. Whoever is inviting and receiving their lover’s affections is in the yin role. Have fun
taking turns.
Men, if this first move is yours, take an ice cube and run it across your lips and into your
mouth and suck on it for a moment, letting it cool your tongue. Pull your lover toward
you for an icy mouth-to-mouth kiss and then open her mouth and hold the ice as you drip
it onto her tongue. Take it back into your mouth and pass the ice cube into hers.
Exchange the ice cube back and forth with passionate kisses until it melts. With your cool
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lips and frosty tongue, plant tender kisses on her cheeks, forehead and eyelids.
Now, replace the cooling yin with the hot yang. Women, take a cinnamon-flavored mint
in your mouth and invite your lover in for a spicy kiss. The zesty treat will feel like a
tingling explosion on your cold lips and tongue. Like you did with the ice cube, heat up
your tongue with the cinnamon mint and pass the hot treat to your lover’s tongue. Let
Go back to the yin by taking an ice cube in your hand. Have your lover lie face down on
the bed so you can gently caress the ice cube in a swirling motion down his spine to the
small of his back and to his buttocks. Let the ice cube drip its cooling moisture into every
crevice to send luscious chills up and down his spine. As the ice cube melts on his back,
blend in some cool body cream. Rub it onto his shoulders, back muscles and buttocks,
sending soothing shivers and arousing chills over every inch of his body.
Men, now it is your turn to combine the magic of yin and yang together. Take another ice
cube and hold it between your teeth as you slide it down her neck to her breasts. Circle it
around her sensitive nipples and watch them become aroused from the chill. Keep trailing
the ice cube down her body to her legs, letting it drip its alluring coolness on her thighs
and calves. Then blow out one of the lit natural emollient candles and allow it to cool
slightly. Let tiny drops of warm wax fall onto her and sensually massage it into her divine
body. The exquisite sensation of both the icy and fiery elements on her skin will intensify
her desire and drive her wild. Now, let her do the same for you, alternating between the
Women, utilize the yang action of surprise by drizzling and massaging the candle wax
around his inner thighs and torso. Then pop another mint before you take his penis in
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your mouth, seductively sucking his member and circling your tongue around the head.
Your hot and spicy tongue can glide up and down his shaft in sizzling, fiery licks igniting
his libido. Simultaneously use your hands to spread the warm wax all over his body
Men, keep the play going by using the yin cooling act of serving your lover and take a
small piece of ice in between your teeth and mouth for a few moments and find your way
down to her genitals. Remove the ice from your mouth and spread her labia with your
fingers. Ever-so-gently run your icy tongue around the rim of her vagina. This chilly
touch may be too extreme for some women so pay attention to her response. Do this a
few times, letting your frosty tongue cool the heat of her vagina. The icy feeling mixed
with her hot desire for you will have her shivering with pleasure. Once more, take the ice
into your mouth and let it get very cold. Remove it and move your icy tongue up to her
clitoris to increase her stimulation. Again, be attentive to her responses in case this cold
temperature is too much for her. When she is close to orgasm, pull away teasingly.
After your fiery and icy foreplay, you will be aching to take your yin yang role play to
the next level. In lovemaking, whoever is on the bottom is in the yin position, and
whoever is on top is in the yang position. To make the most of your role-playing
experience, alternate between taking the yin role and the yang role as you make love.
You may find that taking the role that is the opposite of your natural lovemaking style
will be most exciting for you. Even when you assume the role that is more naturally
suited to you, you can infuse it with thrilling newness by adding a twist to a position that
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you normally use.
Women, after you’ve stimulated his penis with your hot tongue, you will want to wipe off
the cinnamon with a cool cloth. Then move your body up to straddle him on your hands
and knees and lower yourself onto his penis. Your vagina may still feel cold from his icy
If you normally face your lover while on top, turn yourself around so your back is facing
him while you ride his penis. This Taoist sex position is called Bunny Licking Its Fur.
This playful position lets him grab onto your luscious buttocks and offers him a sexy new
view of your gorgeous body while letting you experience new sensations. Place your feet
on the bed and bring your knees up toward your chest and teasingly hop up and down
gently. You will need some strength in your thigh muscles for this sexy move, but it will
be worth it. At first, hop lightly so the penetration is very shallow, making him yearn for
more. Then hop a little higher, allowing the penetration to deepen. Your sassy yet
controlled erotic movements and the different angle on his penis will leave him begging
for more.
Men, take the yang role now and position her so you can take her from behind. If she is
normally on all fours for rear-entry sex, have her bring her knees to the edge of the bed
and lean over so her hands touch the floor, leaving her inviting buttocks high in the air.
This is a highly erotic Taoist sex position called Stepping Tigers. This exotic position
will allow you to control penetration and is perfect for deep thrusting. You can hold onto
her buttocks with one hand as you rub your other hand up her back. She can reach one
hand between her legs and massage your testicles or her clitoris. In keeping with the idea
of trying new things, women, use your non-dominant hand to touch your lover or
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yourself. It will feel new and exciting like a stranger’s touch. After she has reached
As Randy and Nina’s romance was heating up, Randy planned a special overnight date at
a beautiful hotel for Nina. Getting away from their busy lives was a perfect way for the
couple to generate sexual excitement. But Nina wanted to add her own special touch to
this romantic adventure to drive Randy wild. Inspired by yin yang role play, Nina made a
call to room service before they arrived and asked them to run a steaming hot bath for
them. She also asked room service to deliver a few special ingredients, including a bucket
Arriving just minutes after her secret delivery, Randy and Nina walked into the room, and
Nina slowly undressed him and then herself. She led him into the bathroom, which was
all set up for this yin yang foreplay and invited him into the steamy tub. He relaxed into
the tub willingly, closing his eyes and letting his daily concerns melt away. At that
moment Nina put a cold wet cloth over his face, then massaged it into his skin. She
removed the cloth and placed another warmer one over his closed eyes. Then she got into
the tub and straddled Randy. She reached for the bowl of cool shaving cream, and began
to rub it gently on his face. As the cool lather spread over his cheeks and neck, Randy
started to purr with pleasure. She then took the razor and dipped it into the cold ice and
Feeling the cold sensations on his face mixed with the hot water against his body, Randy
became intensely aroused. By the time Nina started shaving his neck, he couldn’t hold
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back any longer. Randy took the bucket of ice and poured it into the bath. With the
dueling sensations of the ice and the hot water tantalizing their skin, Randy entered her
right there in the bath for some passionate lovemaking. They topped off their orgasmic
yin yang experience with champagne, drinking some of it and pouring some of the cool
History of Sex
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At the heart of 2nd century BC Taoist sexology was the belief that the ancient sex masters
were alchemists who could transform erotic energy into a potent sexual elixir that
promised multiple orgasms and even immortality. To create their arousing alchemy, the
exercises and a sexy move called the “power lock” that channels sexual energy up the
The power lock involved tightening specific muscles to activate the sacral pump located
at the bottom of the spine and the cranial pump situated at the top of the spine. According
to Taoist sexology, the sacral pump acted as a lever to rapidly move sexual energy from
the genitals up the spine. The cranial pump also acted as a lever, amplifying carnal
pleasure by moving the sexual energy over the crown of the head and down the front of
When ancient Chinese love masters used these sacred techniques, the women—and even
the men, too—often could achieve two, three or even more orgasms. Although the
Taoists recognized that prolonged ecstatic pleasure came more easily to women, they
believed that men could learn to ride the waves of orgasm without ejaculation, giving
them the ability to experience multi-orgasmic sex. Achieving multiple orgasms was a feat
they believed took the sexual experience beyond physical lovemaking and into a sacred,
realm.
By using the same sexual secrets as the ancient Taoists, you and your lover can learn to
create your own incredible sexual elixir that will lead to ecstatic multiple orgasms for you
both. Women, you can experience prolonged whole-body ecstasy that goes beyond the
transient pleasure you feel in your erogenous zones. Men, you can learn how to withhold
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and redirect ejaculation when you orgasm, allowing you to multiply the number of
To become a sexual alchemist like the ancient Taoists, create your own “sexual
laboratory.” You don’t need any chemistry beakers or lab coats for your sexy lab—unless
you like the idea of adding a little role play to this ancient Chinese sex ritual. All you
need is a willingness to experiment with some arousing erotic techniques that are
No doubt, you and your lover have sexual chemistry, that magnetic attraction that draws
two people together. No matter how many years you have been together, you can spark
that sexual chemistry with long and luxurious foreplay, something Taoist teachings
emphasize in the lovemaking process. During this foreplay, slowly and sensually arouse
what the Taoists call the sexual palace, the pelvic area encompassing the internal sex
When you’re both fully nude, lie on your side on the bed or floor facing each other.
Begin creating your sexual elixir with a steamy technique called the Breath of Pleasure.
This secret sexual practice enhances foreplay, increasing desire and elevating sexual
energy inside your sexual palace to prepare you for multi-orgasmic sex.
Look into your lover’s eyes as you inhale deeply and close the opening to your vagina by
contracting your pelvic muscles—the same muscles you would use if you were stopping
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yourself from urinating. Hold this contraction for several seconds. When you contract,
you’ll notice a titillating sense of arousal flowing from your genitals up into your pelvis.
Men, take a deep breath and contract these same muscles to close the tip of the penis
while drawing up the testicles. Then exhale and relax the contraction. Do not use this
Synchronize your breathing so you’re both inhaling and contracting at the same time and
exhaling and relaxing in unison. Do this for five to seven minutes. You will know when
the elixir has been generated when you both begin to feel a pleasurable rippling and
tingling sensation in your genitals traveling up through the pelvis expanding your arousal,
Women, while still lying on your side, bring your knee up and rest it on his waist so he
can enter you to reach the next stage of your sexy experiment. With his erect penis inside
you, continue to expand the sexual elixir together. Men, penetrate gradually and
rhythmically. In unison, inhale and contract your genitals, holding the contraction for
several seconds. When you contract, you’ll both notice a titillating sense of tightening
around his shaft, which adds to the friction and increases the pleasure for you both. Keep
breathing while tightening and releasing your pelvic muscles in harmony with your lover
for six deep breaths. Feel your sexual elixir sensations becoming more vibrant and
Now it’s time to circulate your sexual elixir to electrify and enliven your body. Women,
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roll over to your other side so you are in a spoon position with your knees bent and
buttocks angled against his pelvis. Penetration is limited in this position, which can give
him more staying power. It also leaves one of his hands free to caress your breasts and
In this position, harmonize your breathing again while squeezing and releasing your
pelvic muscles. To strengthen your arousal and intensify your pleasure, the movements of
your lovemaking should match your breathing. As you breathe in, imagine drawing the
elixir up your body along your spine towards the crown of your head. When you exhale,
let the sexual elixir flow like honey down from the crown of your head along the front of
your body. You will feel incredible sexual pleasure flowing around your body. It can feel
so amazing, you may think you have just hit the sexual wheel of fortune.
The final ingredient in your alchemical compound is the power lock, which can pave the
way to multiple whole-body orgasms for you both. As you move into a very hot
lovemaking stage from circulating the sexual elixir, use the power lock. The power lock
involves activating a combination of muscles that will stimulate the sacral pump located
at the bottom of the spine and the cranial pump situated at the top of the spine.
Here’s how you perform this incredibly erotic move. When you are almost ready to reach
orgasm, activate the sacral pump by curling your toes under, turning your tailbone under,
closing your fists and tightening your buttocks and thighs. Simultaneously activate the
cranial pump by tucking your chin in toward your neck and swallowing to draw the
sexual elixir upwards toward the crown of your head. Hold your breath until you feel the
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orgasm traveling away from your genitals up to your brain, then exhale and relax letting
the orgasmic energy flow over your head and down your torso.
When you activate the power lock, you will instantly send the sexual elixir upwards at a
rapid rate and will feel an electrical current of pleasure rising up the spine before a wave
of orgasm rushes over your entire body. With this technique, the orgasm expands within
the body and mind rather than outwards into male ejaculation or female exhaustion.
Because of this, as you make love, you can repeat the sequence over and over for
multiple orgasms.
As you learn to use the power lock, focus first on your own elixir moving up and around
your body. Then as you grow even hotter and more at ease with the move, feel you and
your lover’s elixirs merging and moving as one alchemical compound around both of
your bodies. As you make love using the power lock, you can both experience wave after
wave of blissful orgasmic ecstasy and will feel yourself entering a sacred dimension. You
should realize that it may take some practice to master the power lock, but even if you
don’t manage to unlock its secrets right away, you can still have a lot of fun as you are
learning how.
Alex wanted to experience sexual intercourse quickly without the need for long, drawn-
out foreplay each time. It was taking Leslie longer to become aroused, and this
sometimes put a dent in his desire. Fingering or oral play would eventually do the trick,
but they were eager to find something else that might work to speed up her arousal. I
suggested creating the sexual elixir, which provides circulation through the entire pelvic
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region and increases desire. By creating the sexual elixir during foreplay, it would
I suggested that Leslie try it before getting to the bedroom—while cooking dinner, doing
errands or driving home from work—to get her sexual engine started. Through our talk,
Leslie revealed that Alex not only wanted a quickie, but he also wanted to have a stronger
erection throughout. I told them the sexual elixir could help with that issue, too.
That week, Alex and Leslie took some time during their day to create their sexual elixir.
It was their own little secret arousal practice that they could do anywhere, anytime. And
since they could do it fully clothed without touching themselves, no one would ever
know except perhaps for the big smiles on their faces. They reported back to let me know
that Leslie had suggested a quickie in the backseat of the car one afternoon after dropping
off their kids at soccer. They both felt spontaneous and free, and Alex reported having a
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Chapter Two
30
Intro
India, an exquisitely colorful, sensual and mystical land where the holy Ganges river
flows from the highest snow-capped peaks in the world—the Himalayas—is considered
by many to be the birthplace of carnal knowledge. More than 1,000 years ago, this
intriguing and spiritual “Shangri-La” spawned Tantra, the most well known of all the
ancient sacred sexual practices. A Sanskrit word that means “to weave” or “to expand,”
Tantra and its rituals for sexual intimacy were primarily intended to provide Hindus with
Originating before 800 AD, Tantra honored two principle deities: Shakti, a female
goddess, and Shiva, a male god. According to Tantric philosophy, these deities resided
within each and every human as divine energy that flows through the body, much like the
way blood courses through the veins. This energy is concentrated in “chakras” located at
the base of the spine, the genitals, the abdomen, the solar plexus, the heart, the throat, the
“third eye” in between the eyebrows and the crown of the head.
Tantric followers believed that by practicing certain intimate sexual techniques and
channel that divine energy throughout the body to reach enlightenment and enjoy
transcendent ecstasy, which is a feeling of pleasure so great it exists outside the limits of
Many Tantric erotic techniques involved meditation and chanting as a way to get in touch
with the deity within oneself and to honor the divine in one’s lover. When meditation was
combined with specific love postures, it was believed to extend, intensify and enhance
lovemaking. Many of the Tantric love postures were first described in the Kama Sutra,
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the most famous sex book of all time. Attributed to the Indian philosopher Vatsyayana,
who lived during what is referred to as the Golden Age of India from around 320 to 550
AD, this seminal love manual includes graphic descriptions of sixty-four sexual practices.
Among the enticing Tantric sexual techniques was the practice of weaving the sensory, or
drawing on what two lovers could hear, see, smell, feel and taste while making love. By
paying attention to awakening each of the five senses, a couple could bring themselves
more fully into the present moment, creating a more pleasurable dimension in their
lovemaking.
Taking the sensory awareness a step further, couples practicing Tantric sex could also
activate and enjoy the intense sensations of their raw yet potent sexual energy, which was
called kundalini, flowing through the chakras. By channeling kundalini energy through
the body during lovemaking, a couple could achieve heightened pleasure and clarity.
They could also experience a feeling of joyous union with each other and, at times, a
Another intoxicating Tantric pathway to glorious sex included prayerful sexual positions
that required focusing on both the exciting external sexual stimuli and the heavenly
internal subtle sensations while making love. During this powerful sexual intercourse, the
woman would praise the role of the lingam, the Tantric name for the erect male penis.
The man would praise the role of the yoni, the Tantric term given to the aroused female
sex organ. By skillfully executing these love postures, two lovers could generate the
most physical pleasure and the deepest intimate connection possible. Couples who
engaged in these prayerful sexual positions with their whole hearts and minds performed
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Eroticism is firstly a search for pleasure, ...a perception of the divine state, which is
infinite delight."
History of Sex
In Tantric philosophy, men and women honored the god Shiva and the goddess Shakti,
two deities who were believed to live within all humans. When men and women
recognized and honored the divine god and goddess within themselves and within their
partner, each became a more radiant, passionate, powerful and expressive lover.
This was accomplished by coupling erotic Tantra with spiritual practices, such as
meditation and chanting, which have been practiced for thousands of years and are
recognized as some of the most common components of nearly all Eastern religions.
Meditation is a practice of calming the mind that can increase harmony and improve
Meditating during a Tantric encounter made it easy to sink into a deep state of
appreciation for a lover. Similarly, chanting attuned a couple’s chakras and inspired them
to share more of themselves during sex. Both meditation and chanting greatly increased a
couple’s desire for intimate connection and allowed them to extend their lovemaking,
sustaining intercourse for an hour or more to the delight of both lovers. When these
sacred rituals were blended with erotic Tantra, it offered lovers a pathway to supreme
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You, too, can honor the divine in your lover by combining elements of meditation and
chanting with Tantric sexual positions. By exploring these ancient practices, you can turn
a typical quickie into a long, luxurious interlude that brings you closer to your lover and
In today’s fast-paced world, couples often hurry through sexual encounters on a singular
quest for the Big O. With Tantric love, however, you’re encouraged to slow down and
trade goal-oriented sex for something more meaningful and ultimately, more pleasurable.
You can follow these teachings of Tantra by honoring the divine in your lover, a practice
that involves showing deep appreciation for your beloved, introducing basic elements of
meditation and chanting to your foreplay and lovemaking and experimenting with Tantric
sex postures. Surprisingly, you may find that when you stop focusing on attaining an
Honoring the divine in your lover by showing how much you appreciate them is always a
good idea. When you are first dating a new lover, it’s easy to shower them with
beautiful thing. But as a relationship grows and deepens, there’s a tendency for the
adoring words to fade and not surprisingly, when this happens, your sexual chemistry
might fade too. In this Tantric exercise, try to see beyond your lover’s faults to recapture
the wonder that first inspired you to connect with that person and turn on your sexual
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desire for each other anew.
In the nude, sit across from each other on the bed or the floor and admire each other. You
may want to acknowledge your lover as a love goddess or love god. Honor the physical
attributes you find appealing about your lover and don’t forget to recognize their inner
beauty, too. Showing your appreciation is as simple as looking into each other’s eyes,
opening your heart and saying a few nice things to each other. You can make it as serious
By focusing on your lover’s positive attributes, you’ll set the tone for the intimate
journey upon which you’re about to embark. This is also a good time for you to honor the
love god or goddess within yourself, too. Women especially tend to focus on the things
we don’t like about ourselves. But this practice gives you a chance to shift your attention
to your best qualities to boost your confidence. And when you’re feeling good about
yourself, you’ll feel freer to have more fun with this Tantric sexual adventure.
If you want to have some fun honoring the divine in your lover, add ancient Tantric
chanting to your foreplay. Lean over to your lover and press your mouth against his or
hers as you chant the sound “om” (pronounced “aum”). This Sanskrit sound is believed to
create the same frequency as the universe. For you and your lover, chanting this sound as
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you kiss will create a titillating vibration in your mouths and open your mind to new
foreplay possibilities.
Let your humming kiss travel over your lover’s chakras, starting at the middle of the
forehead. Chanting to your lover’s chakras will tease that area of their body to open up.
Have your lover lie on their back as you move in for an arousing full-body chant. Chant
the sound “om” again directly and softly on the point between their eyebrows. Give a
humming kiss to what Tantrika’s call the third eye chakra. Move your kisses to the throat
chakra at the base of the throat to chant the sound “ham” (pronounced “haum”). Your
Now, ease your attention to the heart chakra at the center point between and just above
the nipples to chant the sound “yam” (pronounced “yaum”). Yam will make your lover
feel very yummy. Seductively graze your lips over the skin until you reach the navel
chakra and chant the sound “ram” (pronounced “raum”) right into your lover’s belly
button. You will really rev your lover’s engine with this “ram” kiss.
Take your prize by drifting down to the sex (sacral) chakra and lavishing your sexy
humming kisses all over you lover’s genitals chanting the sound “vam” (pronounced
“vaum”). Va-va-va-vam will awaken a sex tiger, so watch out. While you are there, move
your tongue ever so slightly down to touch the root chakra at the spot in between the
genitals and the anus. This area called the perineum is rich in nerve endings and is one of
the most sensitive and electrifying spots on the body, particularly for men. With your
mouth halfway open, chant a hot sounding “lam” (pronounced “laum”) into this area to
Then, if desired, have them roll over on to their stomach so you can continue humming
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your way up their chakras, from the base of their spine all the way up to the crown of the
head. This potent full-contact chanting can awaken and open the chakras and fill your
Take turns honoring and pleasing each other with this unique adaptation of Tantric
chanting. You may want to trail your chanting kiss back down your lover’s body to the
genitals for extended oral sex. Men, keep humming as you cover her clitoris with your
mouth to produce teasing vibrations that will excite and arouse her. Then let her take your
penis in her mouth while she continues her sacred chanting, and you’ll discover why
By now, you’ll probably be so turned on that you’ll want to honor the divine in your
lover by experimenting with a heavenly Tantric love posture. Here’s an exciting sexual
position from the Kama Sutra that is so exotic and delicious you may want to stay in it for
Called the Turning Position, it is performed with the man sitting on the floor or bed with
one arm behind him for support. She lies on her side in front of him between his legs with
her top leg up in the air so he can hold her ankle with his free hand. Her bottom leg is
bent so her foot is pressed against his knee. This wild love posture adds visual stimulation
for him and allows her to intensify or ease penetration to prolong the encounter. If she
wants to make him last longer, she simply presses her foot against his knee to pull her
If this love posture is too acrobatic for you, improvise. Using the Turning Position as
37
inspiration, you can modify it in many ways. For example, she can lie with her back
propped up on pillows in front of him with her legs on either side of him, and he can
either be sitting or kneeling as he enters her. Or, she can lie on her back and bring both
legs up against his chest so her feet are at his neck as he penetrates her from a sitting or
kneeling position.
Whichever position you choose, remember to stay focused on honoring your lover rather
than rushing to reach orgasm. Talk to your lover as you make love, letting them know
how much they turn you on and what you find most sexy about them. You can also
continue humming or chanting to create a more exotic ambience. The good vibrations
from the chanting combined with this stimulating Tantric position will lead you across
Tom was on thin ice with Rebecca. She had basically told him she was fed up with his
criticism. Tom had a knack of criticizing Rebecca for small things, like where she hung
her wet towel in the bathroom or what kind of music she liked to listen to, and that added
up to big fights that shut down their sex life. Tom was taken by the Honoring the Divine
in Your Lover ritual and felt it could help him get things back on track in their
relationship. He decided to carry out this special intimate encounter at one of Rebecca’s
Upon arrival, Tom rolled out a blanket and asked Rebecca to sit as he took both of her
hands in his. He said, “I have brought you here to this special place not to just enjoy
nature but to honor your divine nature.” Rebecca, stunned, began to blush. Tom
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continued, “You are beautiful beyond words. You are a joyful free spirit who brings me
so much laughter and happiness. You are my sex goddess, and you turn me on like no
one else could.” Tom kept going on and on. The more Tom communicated his
appreciation for her, the more the defenses around Rebecca’s heart melted. Moved deeply
by Tom’s ritual of honoring her, Rebecca finally whispered to him, “Stop talking,” and
gave him a passionate kiss that led to an afternoon of great sex, during which, she
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History of Sex
According to Tantra, lovers were encouraged to use all five of their senses to arouse their
desire and elevate their lovemaking to an exquisite ritual. The most enticing sensation,
however, derived from channeling their sexual energy, known as kundalini, through the
chakras. Kundalini is a Sanskrit word that means “snake”, and this energy source was
believed to lie coiled at the base of the spine like a serpent waiting to strike. Some
According to Tantric texts, two lovers had to be in good health and had to have
harmonious intentions in order to activate kundalini safely. If they met these conditions,
couples could channel the kundalini during lovemaking by envisioning their potent
sexual energy rising up within their bodies and traveling from chakra to chakra—from
the base of the spine to the genitals and then on to the abdomen, the solar plexus, the
heart, the throat, the third eye and finally, the crown of the head.
As the kundalini rose through the chakras, sexual pleasure intensified, and the lovers
experienced a heightened clarity of the relationship between themselves and the divine.
They might also feel a vast array of sensations, including a pleasurable warmth,
electrifying tingles, subtle vibrations, peaceful inner sounds like a waterfall or flute, and
transcendent peace and joy. By tapping into their kundalini energy and their bodily
senses, Tantric lovers ultimately enhanced sexual intercourse and achieved idyllic
Tantric lovers typically practiced channeling their kundalini energy while engaging in
specific sexual positions. Many of the sexual positions they used were detailed in the
Chandamarosana Tantra, an important metaphysical work from the 9th century that
40
detailed thirteen sex postures. The ancients believed that these erotic positions helped
Like Tantric lovers, you can enrich your lovemaking by weaving the sensory into your
own sex acts. Staying fully attuned to your five senses as you make love, you can awaken
your body to delightful sensations that will increase your desire and expand your
pleasure. Adding kundalini into this sensory experience can introduce your lovemaking to
a whole new terrain of sexual exploration that will lead to sublime orgasms.
Weave the sensory into your Tantric lovemaking adventure by creating a sexy scenario
that heightens your and your lover’s five senses—sight, hearing, smell, touch and taste.
wondrous nuances that you may have never noticed or felt before. Remember one of the
basic rules of Tantric love when arousing your lover’s senses: take your time. Think of
your Tantric sensory experience as a slow burn in which you bring your lover’s body to a
simmer rather than a fast boil. With this approach, your erotic encounter will provide you
In this Tantric-inspired scenario, you will ignite and delight all of your lover’s senses in
preparation for your kundalini journey. Since humans typically rely on sight as our most
important sense of all, you may want to find ways to heighten the other four senses. One
simple way to do so is to turn down the lights completely so you’re in total darkness
41
except for a candle or two flickering in the distance. Then begin to shower your lover
with an array of sensations that will delight their body and ignite their desire.
Start by having your nude lover lie against big luscious pillows in velvet, satin or soft
cotton. Perhaps place two pillows under their head, one under each arm, one under the
torso, one under the hips and a couple more under the legs. This positioning will
automatically allow your lover to sink into a relaxed and receptive state for this sensual
play. If there is a chill in the air, drape them with a sheet. Then begin to weave your
First, begin to entice their sense of hearing with some sexy sounds. For instance, you can
provocatively tap and beat on a drum to create an arousing rhythmic sensation in your
lover. If you are a musician, play your own favorite instrument, such as the piano or a
guitar to woo your lover and increase their desire for you.
To get more of a Tantric experience, try making sound with a singing bowl, used in
Tantric rituals and commonly in yoga and meditation. To produce an electrifying sound
with a singing bell, you can run the mallet that comes with the singing bell around and
around the rim. This will create a simultaneous soothing and vibrating sound that will
open your lover’s heart and body to you. You can also tease your lover with sound by
wearing a charm bracelet or anklets with bells that shake and jingle with every sexy move
you make. Walk or dance around your lover, coming closer then backing away, enticing
Next, ignite your lover’s desire by arousing their sense of smell. Take a fresh fragrant
flower and hold it under your lover’s nose so they can inhale its natural rousing
fragrance. Then activate a tactile sensory experience by taking off the petals and
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seductively dropping them one by one on to your lover’s face and chest. If you’re
wearing perfume or cologne, flirtatiously lean in close so your lover can catch its
intoxicating scent on your neck as you distribute the soft alluring petals upon the skin.
For a sweet-smelling, tactile and tasty sensation all in one, sprinkle your lover with honey
dust, a delicately fragrant, silky, edible powder made with pure, natural honey. Honey
dust was prized as a skin conditioner in ancient India, and it is still sold today as a sensual
treat for lovers. The delectable dust comes with a handmade feather applicator that will
delight your lover’s body. You can awaken your own taste buds as well as your lover’s
by licking it off their body and then sharing a deep soulful kiss.
Keep using the honey duster or change to a simple feather to intensify your lover’s sense
of touch. Tickle and tease their body, brushing the feather lightly down their neck to their
nipples and watch them respond in excitement. Then use the lightest touch of your own
fingers and hands to delight your lover’s body. Alternate between light, fluttery touches
and deep strokes to create a unique and unexpected sensory reaction that will make them
melt beneath your hands. Add tender lovebites to surprise your lover and you will have
them playfully begging you to stop. Take sensual materials like silk or pashmina and
brush them gently against your lover’s body and genitals, activating full arousal.
To provoke the sense of taste, feed your lover grapes or dip your finger in some melted
chocolate and let them lick it off. Women, you can really heat up the passion by inserting
one or two fingers into your wet vagina and then bringing them to your lover’s lips. Not
only will he be able to inhale your intoxicating scent, but he can also lick your delicious
love juices off your fingers. At this point, notice how every one of your senses is
completely turned on, setting a perfect tone for the awe-inspiring kundalini experience to
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come.
Your slow and delicious sensory foreplay will have you both aroused and ready to try an
erotic Tantric love posture that the ancients believed could activate kundalini. This
flexibility and strength so don’t be surprised if you can only hold this exciting position
for a few moments. Even if you can’t sustain this position for long, you’ll enjoy the few
In this sexy love posture, he squats deeply so his buttocks meet the back of his feet, and
he’s supporting himself on the balls of his feet with his knees apart. If the mere idea of
doing a deep squat makes your knees hurt, try sitting on a stack of pillows with your
knees spread wide. She straddles his lap so her feet are off the floor, and she clasps her
hands on his shoulders or around his neck while he places his arms around her waist. He
initiates a subtle thrusting motion as she grinds her pelvis against him. As you begin to
make love, maintain your heightened awareness of all of your senses, drinking in the
amazing way your lover feels, smells, sounds, looks and tastes.
Men, when your thighs start burning, you can fall back so you end up sitting on the floor
or on a pillow with your legs bent or straight out in front of you. She is still straddling
your lap with her knees bent on either side of you and her feet on the ground. Both of you
wrap your arms around each other like braids as one of you leans back and then the other
tilts back to create a gentle rocking back and forth motion. This evolution of the
44
might feel if you were sitting in a swing.
With this sexy move, his penis remains rather still although the penetration deepens
blissfully and then becomes teasingly shallower as you rock back and forth. This gentle
motion is designed for maximum endurance to lengthen your pleasure, just like the
ancient Tantric sex masters recommended. Similarly, the subtle rocking motion can
What’s even better about this erotic love posture is that it can take your experiment of
weaving the sensory to sensational, new lovemaking heights. That’s because the Tantrics
believed that this love posture was ideal for activating kundalini. To awaken kundalini
through the act of joyful lovemaking, think about the sexual energy building in your
genitals as you both rock back and forth. The deep breathing, soft moans of excited
pleasure and hot sexual movements of your lovemaking will inspire the kundalini to rise
up through your bodies. Concentrate on the energy moving up your spine through each
chakra of your body. Feel it creating a pleasurable warming and tingling sensation as it
rises through the root, the sex, the navel, the heart, the throat, the third eye and the crown
chakras like liquid fire. Be sure to consciously enjoy the uniqueness of these new feelings
When the kundalini reaches the crown of your head, you will experience the awakening
of the whole body, the sense of pure joy and the absolute pinnacle of pleasure and
spiritual awakening. If the energy ever feels overwhelming, sit up and focus on your feet
to move the kundalini back through the body, which can spread the sensually pleasing
45
feelings throughout your limbs. To continue this thrilling kundalini ride, transition to a
favorite sexual position and stir the sexual sensations at the genitals again, amplifying
you and your lover’s sexual breathing and connection. Then feel the kundalini in both of
you move up the spine again, activating new dimensions of sexual ecstasy.
46
History of Sex
Much of Tantric sex is rooted in erotic love postures, which we refer to as sexual
positions. Because these love postures were designed to awaken the spirit as well as to
ignite carnal desire and increase physical pleasure, they were known as prayerful sexual
positions. Many of these love postures were depicted in the Ananga Ranga, a Hindu book
from about the 16th century that borrowed from the Kama Sutra and other Indian love and
sex treatises. In this classic work, the dizzying array of lovemaking postures were
categorized into six groups: woman lying on her back, woman lying on her side, sitting
positions, standing positions, woman lying on her stomach and finally, woman on top.
Within each category, numerous erotic and fairly acrobatic variations are described.
When engaging in these prayerful sexual positions, Tantric lovers would focus all of their
attention on the sexual act at hand, offering precious affection to the lingam, a man’s
erect penis and the yoni, a woman’s vagina. By staying present in the moment and using
their powers of concentration in these positions, Tantric bedroom adepts could elevate
Modern-day couples can take a cue from Tantra and experiment with prayerful sexual
positions. By adopting the steamy love postures of the ancient Tantric sex masters, you
can introduce a new menu of thrilling positions to your lovemaking repertoire, making it
anything but routine. And when you add the Tantric sex practice of remaining present in
the moment and concentrating with all your heart and soul on your lovemaking, you will
transform your sex into a passionate worship service. That can only offer a clear path to
inspirational bliss.
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Plan an unforgettable morning or entire day of steamy sex so you and your lover can
[ital]Ananga Ranga [ital]. It will be best if you both schedule this Tantric session ahead
of time so that you are at liberty to give your lovemaking your full devotion. Do any
household chores before your Tantra session begins so your mind doesn’t wander to
those clothes that need washing or the grass that needs mowing. If you have kids, send
them to a friend’s house so the two of you can enjoy some divine alone time.
Remember that spending hours in a Tantric love lock can work up an appetite so prepare
delicious foods ahead of time that are ready to enjoy when you take a Tantric break. If
you really want to commit to staying in the present moment with your lover, turn off your
cell phones too. This will give you the opportunity to focus completely on your lover and
this extended moment of prayerful pleasure. With this kind of pledge, your Tantric
adventure is guaranteed to lead you on an ecstatic exploration like you have never
experienced before.
During your Tantric lovefest, experiment with as many of the following irresistible
lovemaking positions as you can handle. Start your Tantra off right by enjoying one of
these steamy love postures when you first wake up in the morning. This will awaken your
bodies, hearts and minds to the heavenly Tantric journey that awaits you. Continue your
morning or entire day by joining in sacred union whenever the mood strikes, whether it’s
in the afternoon, evening or middle of the night. You will find that these prayerful sexual
positions lead to a fulfilling emotional connection with your lover and stimulating
physical contact.
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Inexhaustible Kindness is a sexy Tantric position that will have you both praying that it
never ends. To perform this ancient love posture, she reclines on her back and brings both
of her knees to her chest and places both of her feet on her lover’s chest. Men, sit in front
of her with your legs bent and out to the sides of her legs. Wrap your arms around her
torso and hug her close to you as you penetrate her with rhythmic thrusts.
The beauty of this lovemaking position for women is that it lets you take control of the
depth of those stimulating strokes, which can help him delay orgasm. Men can
simultaneously control the rhythm of the strokes by pulling her body closer. As she
pushes away and you pull her close, you create dynamic sexual tension that will lengthen
When he gets close to orgasm, just push your feet gently against his broad chest so he
can’t penetrate you as deeply. He could playfully wrestle with you for deeper penetration.
Use this time to subdue his fire slightly by kissing him passionately, whispering sweet
things in your lover’s ear and massaging yourself to turn up your arousal. Then relax your
legs as a clear indication that you want him to resume deep rhythmic penetration.
Considering that this position is called “inexhaustible”, you may want to use this erotic
Tantric technique several times for a marathon sacred lovemaking session that will leave
In this hot love posture, she leans on her back with her eyes lifted up to the heavens. She
lets one of her legs relax on its side with her knee slightly bent forming a V. He sits in
front of her between the V of her leg with one leg bent so his thigh touches his chest and
49
his foot rests under her thigh. His other leg lies to the side of her luscious body. He raises
her other leg up high in the air and places it gently against his head. Men, this wildly
exciting position leaves your hands free to roam your lover’s body, stroking her soft inner
thighs, caressing the curves of her breasts and massaging her clitoris.
Men, you can try a couple of different motions within this position: hold the back of her
thighs and push them away, allowing for a very arousing stroke that can change between
slow and fast. You can also grab her hips from underneath and pull them towards you
with as slow and long a stroke as possible. As you look down, you can watch the lingam
and yoni uniting in this beautiful Tantric dance over and over. This position also offers
intimate eye-to-eye contact so you can deepen your connection while you bring each
According to the [ital] Ananga Ranga [ital], the Remembrance Wheel—also known as
the Wheel of Kama (the Love god)—is a position designed specifically for more
voluptuous lovers. In modern times, however, anyone can enjoy the sensational joys of
this Tantric love posture. In this position, she lounges on a bed with a few pillows
propped behind her back and spreads her legs out wide, keeping them straight. Men, you
sit between her legs and press your hands together as if in prayer and then place them
both on her thighs to push them as far apart as is comfortable for her.
As you make love, use your arms to lift her legs gently. Then as your penetration
becomes steady and rhythmic, utilize your arms under her elevated legs to turn her body
slowly from side to side to create incredible sensations along the penis and inside the
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vagina. Feel this motion sending waves of pleasure up into your bodies and the seven
chakras as you turn your wheel of love. Notice each sensational turn bringing you more
Feet in the Air is one of the more acrobatic love positions depicted in the Ananga Ranga.
Women, you will need to be fairly flexible to enjoy this position fully. Lying back against
some pillows, place your hands on the backs of your knees and draw them in as close as
you can to your breasts. Keeping your knees in close to your breasts, lift your feet up into
the air so the soles of your feet are facing the ceiling or, if you are super flexible, facing
the wall behind you. He sits as close as possible to you on bent knees, as if kneeling at an
altar.
To begin, men, insert your penis and clasp her lower back to pull her gently forward. As
you steady your strokes, you can let go of her lower back, giving her the freedom to arch
and collapse her lower back to shake up the sensations of pleasure. Place both of your
hands on her gorgeous breasts and caress them while you make sacred love. Tease her
nipples with light touches and then bring one hand down to her genitals so you can
massage her clitoris with your thumb while you thrust rhythmically.
Women, if you can’t hold this position for long, start with your feet in the air then bring
them back down near your buttocks or rest them on your lover’s shoulders. With this
lusty Tantric love posture, he can lean in close to you as he penetrates to show his desire
for you and to infuse more intimacy into the moment. He can also pull back to a sitting
position, which offers thrilling visual stimulation. Dive deep into this exploratory sexual
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journey, during which you stretch yourself both physically and spiritually, to relish this
perfect moment.
Lana and Jessie had always loved sex with each other, but it had gotten to the point where
it just felt like work. They were both interested in working their way through it. I asked
the couple what they felt both physically and emotionally when they were having sex.
Lana told me that physically, sex felt like friction these days. Jessie said that emotionally,
he was somewhere else, thinking about the calls he needed to return. Lana found herself
fantasizing about other men while they were having sex. They both agreed they were not
I suggested that they try one of the Tantra prayerful positions designed to engage all of
your awareness into the act of lovemaking and utilize the weaving the sensory ritual
along with it to bring their mind and body to the moment. They choose the Inexhaustible
Kindness position and decided to focus on bringing more kindness to their sex life and
awakening all of their senses. By placing heightened focus on watching each other’s
facial expressions, listening to each other’s sounds of pleasure and feeling the amazing
sensations of his hard penis in her wet vagina as they moved in this Tantric position, they
started to feel more and more pleasure. They also found that by focusing on each other,
they brought themselves more fully into the act of sex, which resulted in an abundant
surge of desire and energy to prolong their lovemaking. In follow up, they were happy to
say that their experiment with Tantric love postures and techniques also made sex more
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Chapter Three
53
Intro
As the life-giving Nile snaked through the enchanted and fertile terrain of Ancient Egypt,
it gave birth to many powerful pharaohs but none so great an icon as Cleopatra, legendary
for her powers of seduction and for her sexual liaisons with the ancient world’s most
powerful rulers. Cleopatra’s secret was one that all ancient Egyptians shared: sex wasn’t
considered taboo. In fact, it was a vital part of the entire life cycle—from birth to death
While the people of this fascinating civilization enjoyed a romantic, sexual and sensual
freedom in their daily lives, they firmly believed that earthly carnal pleasures were
intricately bound with the gods. In fact, a variety of sexual rituals dating back to 3,500
BC in Ancient Egypt were believed to offer lovers access to eternal life. According to
Egyptian lore, when people coupled their sexual experiences with devotional rituals it
pleased the gods. This could earn Egyptians an extended life and a favorable afterlife.
Many sensual Egyptian rites paid homage to the pantheon of gods and goddesses revered
by the people living in this narrow strip of rich land bound by vast, barren desert hills.
One of these erotic Egyptian rituals was cat worshipping, which was inspired by the cat
goddess Bastet. The worship of Bastet, who was depicted as a woman with the head of a
wild desert cat, began around 3,500 BC, and became the national religion around 950 BC.
The annual festival held in honor of the cat goddess in Bubastis, Egypt, was a bawdy
affair that attracted thousands of revelers from all over the ancient world. The wildly
decadent celebration centered on seduction and music. During the revelry, many women
would lift up their skirts to reveal their genitals, a gesture viewed as a reverent act at the
time.
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While cat worshipping at the Festival of Bastet was open to all Egyptians, the ancient
Egyptian ritual of anointing was far more selective. Anointing involved placing an
unguent, such as luscious oil, on an important and highly honored person’s face or body
in an exclusive setting. For instance, pharaohs were commonly anointed with oil at their
coronation ceremony, and the ritual of anointing could also be enjoyed between a
husband and wife. In Egyptian times, people believed that the ritual of anointing actually
transferred divinity from the deities to the earthly person, giving him or her god-like
powers. Making use of delicious fragrant oils, Egyptian couples anointed each other as an
While the ritual of anointing between lovers was a form of foreplay for succulent
sexuality, another ancient Egyptian rite called the sex magic of Isis centered wholly on
two people having wild intercourse. The goddess Isis, the daughter of the god of the
Earth and the goddess of the Overarching Sky, was known as the goddess of magic and
particularly sex magic. The sex magic of Isis was a secret ritual practiced only by a select
In this ritual, the lovers would engage in electrifying sex that created an intense sexual
energy. They would then envision this sexual potency transforming into two snakes that
would rise up through their bodies producing incredible pleasure. In performing this
ritual, the goal of the two lovers would be to reach an exalted state of ecstasy during
lovemaking in order to strengthen what the ancient Egyptians called the Ka body, a body
These ancient practices can be recreated in your own way to infuse your lovemaking with
more mystery, seduction, sensuality and sexual freedom. Practicing cat worshipping
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gives you the chance to have fun with role-playing as you get in touch with the erotic
wild cat lover in you. Using luscious oils all over your bodies in an impassioned sexy
anointing ritual promises a host of new and pleasurable bodily sensations for you and
your loved one to enjoy. And acting out the sex magic of Isis can usher you and your
Secret gay affairs, wild same-sex dreams, and homosexual escapades within the palace
walls, gay sex played a part in ancient Egyptian society. Thanks to archeological digs,
evidence of same-sex couplings in this ancient land have been unearthed. One of the
oldest finds is a tomb from the Fifth Dynasty—around 2,600 BC—that shows two men
who worked as manicurists for King Niuserre in an intimate embrace. This image could
be the first depiction of a gay kiss in all of history. According to historians, about 400
years later, King Neferkare engaged in a secret gay affair with General Sasenet. Other
evidence of homosexuality in Ancient Egypt includes a book about women’s dreams that
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Cat Worshipping
History of Sex
The domesticated cat held an exalted position in ancient Egyptian society, and anyone
caught killing a cat was punished with death. Cat worship was derived from the belief
that felines embodied the deity Bastet, known as the cat goddess. Revered as a goddess of
sensual pleasure the cat goddess was also known as “Pasht”, a name that is believed to be
the origin of the English word passion. The cat goddess inspired a highly sensual yearly
ritual called the Festival of Bastet, during which men and women would assume the
intoxicating sounds of music and purring to communicate their passion. The revelers
would also douse themselves in perfume to awaken the senses and would shake rattles to
create an aura of tension within the temple. By taking on a cat-like nature, the
worshippers felt a freedom to express themselves erotically and would expose their
For a decidedly sensual romantic experience, you can practice the sacred art of cat
worshipping in the privacy of your own bedroom. By taking on the mysterious and
mercurial characteristics of the feline, you and your lover can choose to explore the
playfulness of your inner sex kitten or the ferocity of your inner lion as you perform a
You can make the sensual ritual of cat worshipping your own by getting in touch with
your feline side. When you and your lover embody the qualities of a cat—mysterious,
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curious, sexy, supple, proud, independent—you open the door to a captivating realm of
sexual play that will excite all of your senses. Think of your cat worshipping experience
as a luxurious seduction scenario in which you and your lover patiently pursue one
another before devouring each other sexually. Depending on your personalities, your cat
In today’s fast-paced world, reenacting the cat worshipping ritual gives you and your
lover a chance to take time out from the demands of your daily lives to luxuriate in the
tactile delights of each other’s bodies. By allowing yourselves the time to express your
sexual animal nature and to savor the way your bodies feel, smell, sound, look and taste,
Transform any area of your home into a sexy lair for your cat worshipping ritual. Since
cats love to bask in the moonlight, consider turning on your wild cat in a room with
moonlight streaming in. You don’t need to wait for a full moon to partake in your cat
worshipping ritual, just part the drapes or lift up the shades on your windows and let any
amount of moonlight shine into the room. At the Festival of Bastet, music featuring
drums, rattles and other percussive instruments played a major role in setting the mood,
and it can help you tune in to the sexy cat lover in you. Choose any style of music that
inspires you to move in a slow, catlike, seductive manner for this erotic ritual.
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Cat Wear
To get ready for your delicious cat rite, consider wearing sexy lingerie or briefs made of
sensuous materials that beg to be touched. For instance, try undies made of velvet, silk or
cashmere. These fabrics will feel luscious against your bare skin. Men, if you’re used to
cotton underwear, you’ll love the way wearing these fabrics can awaken the sensations on
your penis and testicles, and you’ll like the way they excite her, too. And women, these
luxurious panties will feel luscious against your hips and vagina, making you wet. Plus,
they’ll feel delicious to your man. You may want to wear a shade of red, the color worn
by the priests and priestesses of Bastet. Drawing on the ancient Egyptians’ use of
perfume during cat worshipping ceremonies, dab your favorite scent on your neck and
Dare to take the cat theme even farther with cat masks. Wearing a mask can help you
channel the feline within and give you the extra confidence to express yourself more
seductively, no holds barred. With cat role-playing, you can act out untamed sexual
desires that you always dreamed about but may have been too shy to try. When you put
on a cat mask, it’s easier to unleash a fierce cat-like personality, one that will turn on
You may also want to partake in your own version of catnip, a substance that produces a
feeling of euphoria in cats. For example, sharing wine together the way the ancient
Egyptians did during the Festival of Bastet might increase your enjoyment of the ritual.
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Engage in Cat Play
Spend an intoxicating evening engaged in cat play with your beloved. During this kinky
cat play, breathe in each other’s alluring scent, feel your lover’s sensual skin and lingerie
fabrics, taste each other’s breath and body with flirty licks and bites, listen to each other’s
seductive purrs and watch your lover’s tantalizing cat-like movements. This will
stimulate each and every one of your five senses, intensifying sexual intrigue and arousal
Just the way cats stalk their prey, you and your lover may want to begin by prowling
around each other to check out your sexy catch. Kneeling on all fours, circle around your
lover, brushing up against them lightly as you pass by. Think of how a cat rubs up against
objects throughout the house and caress your face and body lightly against your lovers as
you engage seductively. Rubbing up ever so gently against your lover’s face, neck, side,
chest and hips will make your hair stand on end with the sensations of your lover’s touch.
Breathe in your lover’s intoxicatingly perfumed skin as your nose traces the length of
their body. As you move, undulate your back, arching it and then rounding it to mimic an
Egyptian cat, expressing your animal magnetism and inspiring the heat in your lover.
Run your tongue along each other’s lips, neck, and body in long arresting licks as you
purr provocatively. Like a cat that loves to scratch, trail your fingernails down your
lover’s chest, down the back, and up the thighs. Start by scratching very lightly and
slowly increase the pressure for an exquisite feeling. As you scratch, pay close attention
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Cats can be very independent, mysterious and aloof, and they don’t always give in to
human commands. Similarly, as you engage in cat play, you may want to play a bit of
“catch me if you can”. Tease your lover by moving in for a passionate kiss and then
pulling away at the last second, leaving them wanting more. Or back off from your
lover’s touch, forcing them to capture you before being able to plant wet kisses on you.
This game of seduction can ignite the cat hunter inside of you both and help you
transform from a flirty pussycat to a wild tiger or lion by engaging each other in a cat
fight of tumbling, mounting and even biting each other in turned-on excitement.
To bring your cat worship ritual to an erotic crescendo, slide off your bottoms and face
each other. With your knees bent and your arms behind you open your legs to offer a
glimpse of your genitals. Let your lover bask in the beauty of your genitalia while you
take in the magnificence of your beloved’s. This highly alluring act of sexual acceptance
is sure to inspire a fierce intimate union. Like cats in heat, pounce on each other and
continue to move with feline ferocity as you consume each other sexually.
Women, imagine being like Catwoman from the Hollywood film and hold your hands
like claws while you purr or hiss at your lover. Push your man down on his back and
straddle him, assuming a prowling stance—kneeling on all fours over him with your
knees near his hips and your fingernails lightly digging into his shoulders as you pin him
down on the bed or the floor. Lightly rake your “claws” down from his shoulders to his
Lower your face and chest to him and purr while you lick and gently bite his chest, his
neck and finally his lips. Meet his outstretched tongue with yours and circle your tongue
around his as you continue to hold him down. Spread your legs wider so your hips are
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near his, and your vagina touches his penis. Move your hips back and forth, rubbing your
labia on his shaft to arouse him and to stimulate your clitoris. When you’re both
sufficiently aroused, maneuver your hand down to his penis and guide it into your vagina,
then put your hand back on his shoulder to help provide support as you glide up and
After a few moments of intercourse, hop off of him, leaving him begging for more. Start
the sexy sequence all over again by prowling around him, purring and undulating your
body. Then pounce on him again and resume intercourse. By interrupting your
lovemaking with more cat play, he can delay ejaculation, giving her more time to reach
climax. Plus, this woman-on-top position offers him exciting visual stimulation and gives
her the opportunity to take control of the depth of penetration and speed of thrusting. It
also gives her a chance to touch her clitoris for added stimulation, putting her in charge of
Joel wanted to surprise Julie with cat worshipping foreplay, but felt he needed to practice
calling out the sexy wild cat in himself. Joel threw himself into the fire by sending an
email invitation to Julie that morning asking her to come over at 8 p.m. dressed as a sexy
cat and that the panther in him would be awaiting ready to make her [ital] purr [ital].
When he received Julie’s enthusiastic email accepting his invitation, Joel’s excitement
and nerves grew. He put on some cool music and did some yogic like cat stretches on the
floor, seductively arching and then lowering his back and gyrating his hips. His cat
confidence grew as he tapped into his inner panther and began prowling in circles
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thinking about what he would do to his catch. When Julie arrived looking deliciously
feline, Joel was prepared, and she was instantly turned on by his palpable animal
magnetism.
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Anointing
History of Sex
The sacred art of anointing, in which rich fragrant oils are applied to a significant
person’s face or body, is commonly associated with Biblical times, but it is believed to
have originated in Ancient Egypt. Oils were a common offering in Egyptian temples and
were viewed as a holy element that was infused with divinity. By definition, anointing
with oil meant to make sacred or to consecrate. Anointing in the Egyptian world occurred
In royal rituals, for instance, aromatic oils were applied to a pharaoh’s head in order to
give him or her god-like strength. Several temple reliefs reveal images of the falcon-
headed sun god Horus and the god of wisdom Thoth anointing the pharaoh, thus instilling
Anointing rituals weren’t reserved only for the powerful in ancient Egypt. Common men
and women often practiced this sacred rite together as a way to honor each other, to
induce hypnotic erotic states and to claim a lover as their own. By pouring scented oils or
even honey onto their beloved’s face or feet, ancient Egyptians initiated romantic
encounters, showed the depth of their devotion and invoked blessings from the gods and
The sacred act of anointing using aromatic oils is a beautiful ancient ritual that you can
easily adapt to your own lovemaking repertoire. Use this sexy rite as a way to
demonstrate the depth of your adoration, or to mark your lover as yours. You can also
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take the anointing ritual beyond its original significance to enhance your lovemaking by
spreading fragrant massage oils all over each other’s nude bodies. Scented oils release
those feel-good endorphins that get you in the mood for a wild night of passion and can
guide you and your lover into a state of pure euphoria. With the silky slickness of the oil
on your bodies, you’ll discover that nothing feels sexier than luscious skin on skin.
To prepare for your intimate anointing ritual, head to the nearest adults-only store or hop
online to shop for fragrant essential oils, scented massage oils or flavored personal
lubricants. Fragrances the ancient Egyptians used for romantic anointing include myrrh,
moringa and rose, a scent known as an aphrodisiac for men and women. Other aromatic
essential oils that enhance a woman’s libido or intensify her sexual response include
yling ylang, anise, neroli and clary sage. Many scents—such as lavendar, anise, jasmine,
flow to the sex organs or increase staying power in men. You may want to purchase a
sampling of oils and experiment with them to find the aromas that give you and your
Erotic massage oils and sexual lubricants also offer exciting options for anointing.
Heating massage oils create an arousing warm feeling when applied to the bare skin. In
addition to aromas that stimulate the sex drive, many of these products come in flavored
varieties designed to be licked off a lover. With these tasty oils, you and your lover may
discover tantalizing new ways to please each other orally as you lick and suck the yummy
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For your private anointing ritual, you may prefer other natural elements, such as honey.
This sweet, luscious nectar works best for anointing small areas of the body rather than a
whole-body dousing. Pour a bit of honey on your lover’s forehead, nipples and feet. And
just imagine of the pleasure you’ll both experience when you lick it off.
Whether you’re using essential oils, honey or other sexual lubricants for your anointing
ritual, it’s best to perform your version of this ceremony in the nude. Not only does this
prevent possible stains on clothing, but it also gives you the chance to offer your whole
As you prepare for anointing, let your lover undress you before you do the same for your
beloved. Use this time to get your sexual juices flowing. Men, let your fingers linger on
her breasts as you lift off her blouse, and women, cup your hands around his buttocks as
you slide off his pants. To allow the aromatic oils to produce their most intense effects on
your sexual desire, cleanse your bodies with a damp cloth to remove any lingering scents
from perfumes, colognes or lotions. Before you begin, toss an old sheet on the bed, couch
To begin your anointing sex rite, have your loved one stand in front of you, or sit in a
chair, on the couch or perhaps on the edge of the bed. Raise your anointing oil or honey
up to your nose and breathe deeply to inhale its intoxicating scent. Dab a liberal amount
on your finger and then press it against your lover’s forehead. If you’re using honey or a
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flavored lubricant, let it drip down to the lips where you can seductively lick it off with
your tongue. Nibble on your lover’s lips as you savor the sweet-tasting liquid.
Next, apply more oil to your finger and anoint your lover’s feet, allowing the oil to trickle
down to the toes. Arouse your lover’s desire by sucking the delicious oil (if edible) or
honey from the toes. Continue your anointing ceremony by dripping oil on the nipples,
circling your fingers around them until they harden. Now, let your lover turn the tables
You and your lover may want to communicate a special sexy blessing as you perform
your anointing ceremony. For instance, you can tell your beloved:
• “I call on all the gods and goddesses to instill their sexual powers in you.”
With your choice of oils or flavored lubricants, continue spreading the unctuous fluid all
over your lover’s flesh. Pour some into your hands and rub them together to warm the
liquid before applying it to the body. Men, run your oiled hands down her neck, over her
breasts, and down her belly. Cover her arms, hands and fingers with oil, then sensually
caress the oil into each finger and the palm of the hands to ignite her libido. Turn your
attention to her legs, rubbing the oil in smooth strokes up her legs and onto her inner
thighs, something that’s sure to arouse her most passionate desires. Unless you’re using a
lubricant that’s specifically designed for internal use, avoid rubbing the oil into her
genitals. But don’t forget her backside. Swirling your supple hands around her buttocks
Women, you can treat your man to the same sensual treatment, dripping warm oil down
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his back, butt, arms, legs and chest, stopping just short of his penis where you can apply
lubricant. Using your hands, work the oil into every crevice of his body with strong
pressure. Then lower your own oiled breasts and body onto him and rub your body
against his to drive him wild. Slither your body down lower so you can slide your breasts
and nipples against his erect penis, causing exquisite sensations for you both.
When you’re both ready, move into the missionary position so she is lying with her back
against the bed or floor and he is on top of her. This position will offer you as much
bodily contact as possible, letting you take full advantage of the delicious feeling of your
oiled bodies against one another. In this position, your feet, legs, pelvises, bellies and
chests can touch as you enjoy highly sensory intercourse. She can wrap her arms around
his torso and her legs around his thighs while he rubs his pelvis up and down against hers.
Feel the oil and lubricant, as your bodies glide easily against each other. Allow his shaft
to stimulate her clitoris with a sizzling combination of both friction and moisture. Bring
your bodies as close to each other as possible, creating exciting heat and arousing
pressure for him. Enjoy the incredible sensations you feel from head to toe, bringing you
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that I could anoint you.
Jon and Samantha were celebrating their first year of dating one another, and Samantha
wanted to find a sexy way to communicate her feelings to Jon. We discussed some
possible options, and the anointing ritual was one that fascinated her. Samantha went out
that afternoon and came across some romance-inducing oils in a gift shop. She chose a
couple that smelled so enticing that they made her feel intensely aroused. That night, as
they undressed to make love, Samantha approached Jon and said, “I want to anoint you as
my handsome and exquisite prized lover.” With passion and devotion, she took the oil
and generously marked Jon, smearing the oil to create her initial on his forehead, his
chest, his hips, his inner thighs and his feet. He was noticeably aroused. He then took the
lead and anointed her as his own. Once marked, they rubbed their bodies against one
History of Sex
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One of Ancient Egypt’s most important erotic rituals was called the sex magic of Isis. In
this mind-blowing ritual, a couple would come together in a highly passionate union that
relied on hot intercourse and mysticism. As the two lovers copulated, they felt an intense
wave of sexual energy flowing through their bodies. Using their powers of visualization,
they envisioned that the sexual energy they felt inside took on the form of two serpents—
one black and one gold—that snaked their way up the lovers’ spines, crossing and
overlapping each other as they rose within their bodies. Of course, the snakes weren’t
real, but the sexual energy the couple built up was palpable. These imaginary snakes were
believed to generate at first subtle and then explosive sexual energy within the lovers,
In reaching glorious ecstasy, the two lovers would achieve the ultimate goal of the
ceremony by strengthening the Ka body. The ancient Egyptians believed this was a body
of pure energy that every human possessed in addition to their earthly body of flesh and
blood. Egyptians viewed the Ka body as a nourishing force that helped sustain the
physical body throughout life and into the afterlife, a magical force that could help an
adept perform miracles and a highly romantic force that could create a rich and luscious
union between lovers. Fortifying the Ka’s magnetic energy in this lovemaking ceremony
Most Egyptians, however, knew nothing about the real sex magic of Isis as this secret
lovemaking rite was reserved strictly for pharaohs and a high order of devotees trained in
the magical ways of Isis. Egyptian rulers proudly exhibited their grasp of the revered but
hidden powers of Isis by wearing crowns with cobras. These cobra crowns represented
the pharaoh’s ability to harness those beautiful and awe-inspiring snakes of sexual energy
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induced during the lovemaking ritual. The sex magic of Isis was considered so top secret
that Egyptian hieroglyphics actually used hidden codes to depict the erotic ritual.
In one scene in Egyptian hieroglyphics, there is a figure of Isis offering a snake, coiled on
top of a basket, to King Ramesses. The sign of life, an ankh, stretches from the snake to
Egyptians “in the know” understood that this hieroglyphic referred to the sex magic of
Isis. To ordinary laymen, this painting represented an awesome display of magic and
power.
Everybody wants a little more magic in the bedroom, and this powerful ancient rite can
help you get it. Filled with secrecy and mysticism, the sex magic of Isis will help you and
your lover learn how to use the powers of visualization to create an explosive, ecstatic
sexual experience. Concentrate on the sexual energy building as you make love, and use
visualization to imagine that your super-charged sexual juiciness shape-shifts into a gold
In this process, you’ll likely be feeling the most intense sexual energy in your genitals, so
imagine that these two snakes are rising up from your loins and weaving their way up
your spine during this passionate ritual. By doing so, you will feel the sexual pleasure
building all over your body until it blissfully engulfs you like a mushroom cloud. This
Get into the spirit of this ritual with sexy Egyptian-style makeup that you can wear
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whether you’re a man or a woman. To turn yourself into a coal-eyed minx, line your eyes
with thick black kohl, a substance that is the modern derivative of the eye makeup
actually used in Ancient Egypt. If you don’t have any traditional kohl on hand, you can
also use any brand of black eyeshadow or eyeliner whether it’s a liquid eyeliner, a pencil
or a powder. Use heavy strokes when applying the eye makeup to create a very alluring
For women, you can take it one step further with a short, black Cleopatra-style wig.
Queens and commoners alike in the New Kingdom of Egypt (1570-1070 BC) often wore
wigs on a daily basis. Ancient Egyptian women who didn’t sport wigs might adorn their
natural hair with headbands, flowers, ribbons or beads. Feel free to decorate your wig or
your natural hair with any of these embellishments to help get you in the mood for a
Since this ritual revolves around snakes, you and your lover may want to wear serpentine
rings, necklaces or other jewelry. You can also cover yourselves in sheer linen tunics,
shirts or robes to resemble the transparent linen clothing the ancient Egyptians typically
wore. Although these external accoutrements can help you act like an Egyptian,
remember that this sacred ritual centers on what’s happening inside your body and your
mind.
To begin your sex magic ritual, make sure you’re in the right frame of mind. Men,
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approach this rite as though you were a powerful pharaoh, and women, think of yourself
as a Queen highly trained in the temple rites of Isis. As you come together, stand and take
time to admire how sexy you both look in any Egyptian-style clothing or makeup you
may have chosen. Kiss each other passionately, letting the tips of your tongues flick and
swirl playfully. Let your garments fall to the floor. Women, let your hands roam over the
sinewy muscles of your lover’s body. And men, feel the sensual curves of her thighs and
Adopting a standing position for intercourse during this ritual is ideal. If you have a four-
poster bed, have her reach her arms upward to hold onto one of the posts. If not, have her
stand against a wall with her arms outstretched above her. Women, wrap one leg around
his waist, and men, hold on to her buttocks as you enter her vagina. This is where the
fantasy comes in if you want to explore the sex magic of Isis. Of course, you can simply
For those of you who are intrigued by this ancient Egyptian rite, start concentrating on
the sexual excitement you’re feeling as you have sex. Then imagine that this sexy, juicy
energy is taking the form of two snakes inside you as your bodies writhe in sexual
unison. Breathe deeply all the way down into your pelvis—in and out, in and out —to
match your rhythmic thrusting and envision the serpents stirring there.
Imagine that there’s a snake charmer playing the flute and enticing those snakes to rise
within you as your pelvises grind against each other, providing desirable clitoral
stimulation for her. As your arousal builds, feel the gold snake starting from the right side
of the base of the spine and the black snake starting from the left weaving their way up
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Men, move your pelvis in a circular motion to encourage the ascent of these two snakes
and to increase her pleasure. Pull her down onto the bed and take her from behind. Rear
entry allows for deeper penetration and lets his penis tickle her G-spot. To give her even
more stimulation, position your hand and fingers under her so you can massage her
clitoris with a hot caress. Notice the sexual energy and your pleasure becoming more
As your thrusting becomes stronger, try to imagine the snakes dancing and moving more
sensually within you. Feel the heat of the energy you are creating as your two bodies
blend into one. As you near orgasm, imagine that the snakes reach over the brain below
the skull and face each other dripping golden nectar into your brain for a truly mind-
blowing experience. By letting yourself surrender to this mystical lovemaking, you may
feel a more explosive orgasm and more open and connected to each other. And yes, you
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Chapter Four
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Intro
Three millennia before Lawrence rode his white Arabian stallion through this vast
windswept land where water was scarce and life was fragile, its desert peoples believed
that the secret to health and abundance lay in passionate rituals. These rites of love
commonly practiced from 3,500 BC up until and including Biblical times, offer timeless
Many people who lived in what was once known as the Fertile Crescent, the land
between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers, revered a goddess believed to be the source of
human sexual love and all earthly wisdom. In what is now modern-day Iraq, Syria and
Palestine, this "Queen of Heaven" was given different names, among them, Inanna, Ishtar
and Asherte. In temples built in her honor, high priestesses led the people in mysterious
erotic rites, the most exalted of which was the annual ceremony known as hieros gamos
or “sacred marriage”. Made famous in the book [ital] The DaVinci Code [ital], this rite
involved Sumer's reigning king and high priestess making love before the public in the
royal bedchamber. This explicitly erotic union between their society’s most powerful
woman and man was performed to call forth bountiful blessings for the ruler, the people
Traveling into farther reaches of the Middle East—recognized today as the cradle of
Western Civilization—other ancient beliefs about the body and sexuality existed, many
of which are still practiced today. In ancient Babylon, the erotic phallic dance, which we
know today as pole dancing, was performed as a Spring fertility rite. The lusty dance was
designed to arouse both women’s and men’s libidos so they would engage in sex and
produce more offspring. The people of neighboring Catal Huyuk, today’s Turkey,
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performed a different form of dance—the spiral dance. This spicy trance dance was
believed to give a person access to the intricate labyrinth of their mind and body in order
to dissolve the ego and let go of inhibitions. Both the Islamic Sufis and the goddess-
revering people of Catal Huyuk enjoyed their own spiral dances, Along the Jordan River,
in Canaan, the people of Moses elevated rites of bathing to the center of their intimate
relationships and religious lives, practices that continue as living Jewish traditions.
By exploring these rites and practices you can revitalize your intimate relationship.
Discover how to heighten and consummate the romantic love you feel for your partner in
your own royal bedchamber by performing the rite of sacred marriage in much the same
way it was practiced by the Sumer kings and high priestesses thousands of years ago. Use
the phallic dance to express greater sensuality and sexual confidence in the bedroom and
perform the spiral dance to shed your inhibitions and unleash your wild nature. By
reenacting Jewish bathing rights, you can relax into a sensual experience that will untap
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Hieros Gamos
History of Sex
Practiced as far back as 6,500 BC in the goddess-revering cultures of the Middle East and
Old Europe, hieros gamos was a sex ritual, in which the Sumerian king and high priestess
engaged in intercourse as the local populace watched and cheered. This public ceremony
was believed to bring prosperity to the people of Sumer. The Sumerians believed that
when the king performed the rite of hieros gamos with the high priestess, he would
become infused with strength of the goddess Inanna. This empowered the king to better
protect his people from invaders and to bring riches and good crops to the land.
There is no more beautiful depiction of hieros gamos than [ital] The Hymn to Inanna
[ital], ancient Sumerian verses that are at turns raw, profound, erotic and inspiring. In this
epic love story, Inanna, the Sumerian Goddess of Love, falls in love with and beds the
mythical God King, Dumuzi, who becomes her consort for life.
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Hieros Gamos, Make It Your Own
Creating your own modern-day adaptation of hieros gamos gives you the chance to
discover the powerful lover in you and to unleash sexual potential that you never knew
you had. You can make hieros gamos your own by setting up a royal bed where you and
your lover take on the roles of high priestess and king for an ecstatic and unbelievable
fertile coupling.
For your enactment of this ritual, you may want to wear something resembling the white
robes the high priestess and king wore in ancient times. For a woman, a simple, white silk
or organic cotton nightgown may help you embrace your role as the priestess. For a man,
white pajamas in silk or cotton may make you feel regal. But don’t just wear your roles
on your sleeves. Try to embody the character of a high priestess or king to make this
ritual more passionately arousing. It’s this sense of earthly and mysterious power that will
Preparing a special bed together for this ritual can be very inspiring. Be open-minded
about where you set up your bed—it doesn’t have to be in the bedroom. Ideally, set up
your bed in an area of your home where you can gaze out the window at nature, or move
it outside altogether to make love on the fertile earth. Spread a flat sheet so the edges lie
beyond the boundaries of the bed and adorn it with beautiful natural elements—seasonal
wildflowers, flower petals, shells, pine straw or fruits—to represent the bed’s fertility.
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Create A Fertility Wish
Come together before the ritual begins and decide on a single wish for your enactment of
hieros gamos. Focus on one aspect of your relationship or life that deserves more
abundant fertility. Have fun coming up with a wish that you both want to fertilize. For
instance:
• “May this ceremony rejuvenate our enthusiasm for sexual experimentation with each
other.”
• “May this sex ritual fuel our passions and reward us with …” (Place whatever your
wish is here, such as more love, better health, more abundance, more fun, a great year
ahead, etc.)
Kneel face-to-face with your lover on your royal bed and admire each other. Begin to
kiss each other, slowly at first and then more passionately. Appreciate each other’s
features as you let your hands roam over each other’s faces, necks and bodies. Undress
your lover, letting the sight of their nude body ignite your desire. When you both become
Men, kneel before your priestess as she lies on her back with her legs pressed straight up
against your chest and her feet near your neck. This way, you can offer heavenly caresses
and sizzling kisses on her legs, her feet and her toes to heighten her sensations. She can
run her hands up and down your body, clasping your back and reaching boldly for your
buttocks to guide you into her vulva. This position also offers exciting sensory
stimulation for you both, allowing you to feast on the beauty of your lover’s face and
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body as you take in the sights and sounds of nature around you.
To prolong your lovemaking, take a break from intercourse and shift her hips up higher
so you can delight your priestess with oral pleasure. Women, wrap your thighs around his
neck as he delves his tongue into your vagina then licks it up toward your clitoris. Men,
try the following exciting oral technique to bring her to the brink of orgasm. Press your
tongue against her clitoris and maintain constant pressure on it while you nod your head
up and down and then shake it from side to side. Keep alternating nodding and shaking
When you notice her thighs start to quiver, shift her hips back down the front of your
body so you can resume intercourse. Instead of engaging in your typical hard-thrusting
penetration, move your pelvises together with intense passion to produce sexual heat.
Here’s how. Women, shift your hips from side-to-side as if you were doing a hula dance,
and men, rotate your hips in slow sexy circles. As you both gyrate your hips in this
stimulating combination, it generates exciting friction for him and can create reoccurring
contact with her G-spot, which can lead to a thrilling orgasm for you both.
If creating your fertile wish like the ancient Sumerians is truly your goal, hold each
other’s gaze, creating a stronger connection as you sensually move your pelvises in
aroused unison. As you build your sexual juiciness together, focus on your purpose.
Circulate your pelvis and imagine that your purpose is being stirred into a potent
compound between the two of you as you get hotter and hotter. As you reach a
heightened state of arousal, breathe in deeply concentrating intently on your fertile wish.
Then exhale, breathing out your fertile wish through your body, into your lover and out to
the divine universe with faith that your powerful, ritualistic lovemaking will help make
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your wish come true.
Melanie yearned for a stronger, more intimate connection with her husband Jonathan.
Every time Melanie and Jonathan engaged in sexual activity, Melanie found that
Jonathan’s eyes were closed, making Melanie feel like he was hard to reach. Melanie felt
this might have something to do with his concerns about providing for the family
financially. Melanie discussed her feelings with Jonathan, and he agreed that he hadn’t
been giving everything possible to their sex life and that his absence dampened the
experience. It was time for each of them to step up as lovers. They agreed to try the
In performing this sacred rite, Jonathan and Melanie used an abundance wish for bringing
forth financial wellbeing. They made love with wild excitement to create financial
fertility in their life together. After the ritual, they both felt lighter, playful and much
more fulfilled. Jonathan had brought all of himself (even his financial concerns) to their
intimate encounter. Melanie felt that she finally had the closeness she had wanted all
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History of Sex
What we call pole or maypole dances, in which dancers hold ribbons as they circle
around a pole, were once practiced in ancient Babylon and in many parts of old Europe.
Pole dances as they were practiced in ancient times were also known as phallic dances.
Performed to honor and celebrate fertility, Babylonian phallic dances usually featured
young female dancers encircling a carved upright representation of a human penis. For
this fertility dance, the young women were draped in colorful ribbons that were believed
to ensure the birth of future offspring. Oftentimes, men would join the women in dancing
around the phallic pole. The phallus in ancient phallic dancing represented vital male
You can create your own erotic version of the phallic dance at home using a dance pole.
Think of your phallic dance as a fun and fulfilling love rite that will allow you to explore
new ways to express your sensuality and to tease and please your partner. You can make
it your own by envisioning the rite you're about to perform as a personal, modern-day
mating dance. Enacting your own phallic dance can be an empowering experience. As a
woman, when you see how your movements and passion excite your lover, it can make
you feel incredibly confident and daring in your sexuality. As a man, dancing the pole
can awaken new erotic strength and expression in you that will appeal to your lover.
Watching your woman or man dance playfully or seductively and having them take
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Make an appointment for a private pole dance lesson with your partner or buy a video to
learn the basics. In either case, you can install a removable dance pole in a private area of
your home, such as a studio, den or bedroom, for you and your lover to experiment with
and enjoy this dance. Feel free to approach your pole dance in any way that feels
comfortable to you. If you are adventurous, you may enjoy dancing erotically around the
pole, arousing your lover as he or she watches your every move. If you have a playful
nature, you may prefer a more flirtatious approach. Or, you may feel more at ease and
enthusiastic if your lover joins you so you can dance together around the pole. Dancing
with your lover is fun and playful and can excite you both. This dual dance can inspire
each of you to move together in sensuous new ways that will translate into original sexual
positions in bed.
Create an exotic and erotic setting for your phallic dance by paying attention to music,
lighting and your attire. For music, consider exotic Middle Eastern world music with lots
of drumming and flutes. These inviting dance sounds will tempt your body to flow in a
tantalizing way around the pole. Alternatively, Brazilian music with its sensuous
appealing rhythms can inspire you to lose your inhibitions as you circle and weave your
body around the pole. Add to the ambience with lighting that makes you feel free and
sexy. Consider using candles, colored lighting—such as red or blue lights—or try a little
What you wear can also add to the ambience. Wear something that makes you feel
gorgeous and that will provoke the libido of your lover, One suggestion is to hark back to
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the ancient Babylonian celebrations of spring and renewal by wrapping beautiful multi-
colored ribbons or colorful sheer scarves around your glistening nude body. Sheer fabrics
that seductively reveal a hint of your bare breasts and offer a glimpse of the curve of your
hips can get your lover in the mood for the intense lovemaking that’s sure to follow your
pole dance. For a woman, you can wear pinks, lavenders, scarlets or greens. For men who
want to join in wearing colorful ribbons or sashes, you can use colors that inspire you,
like royal blue and gold. Wrapping yourself in these exquisite ribbons or sashes will
make you feel more sexy for this heated mating dance.
Remember, you don’t need to dazzle your lover with intricate dance moves or athletic
gymnastics on the pole. Simple, sensual moves are often best to get you and your partner
fired up for this exciting, orgasmic love rite. In fact, the real secret to pole dancing isn’t
your moves, it’s your attitude. If you feel confident and have fun performing your dance,
you can be sure that you and your partner will both be intensely aroused. A simple trick
to increase the sexual tension in the room is to hold your partner’s gaze while you dance
around the pole. And as you caress the pole, you may want to bite suggestively on your
bottom lip, and move your body as if you and your lover were entwined in a hot sexual
embrace. If you are wearing sexy lingerie, or if you are draped in colorful scarves or
ribbons, you may want to peel them away slowly as you dance to reveal flashes of your
Heat up your phallic dance by sliding your body down the pole as if you were gliding
down your lover’s aroused body. Caress the pole with long stretched arms and slow,
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delicious strokes of your hands while your hips undulate provocatively. Hook one knee
around the pole the way you would if you were making love. And press up against the
pole as if you were in the throes of ecstasy. Either encourage your lover to stroke himself
while you perform or tease him by making him wait for satisfaction until you complete
your performance. Eventually, allow your lover to unwrap any ribbons or scarves from
your body, and when you’re ready, channel this divine erotic energy from your ancient
Your phallic dance in which you honor the symbolic phallus—the pole—is an ideal
prelude to honoring your own lover’s phallus with an offer of masturbation. Worship his
penis with sensual stroking. Adding a few drops of lubricant to the palms of your hands
before you turn your attention to his shaft can heighten his pleasure. Start by cupping his
testicles in your hand then running your fingers up to the head, where you can circle them
around this intense pleasure zone. Now let your fingers slide down his member before
gripping the base firmly. As your hand glides back up toward the head, slowly twist your
hand back and forth to add pleasure to the sensitive sides of his penis. To bring him to
climax, try a two-handed approach, placing one grip around the head and sliding it down
the shaft to the base. As you near the base, start the same process with your other hand.
This creates a continuous stroke that will make your lover cry out with satisfaction.
Men, you can return the favor by bowing to the goddess within your woman and kissing
her all over her body. Start by kissing her feet. Slowly move your sexy kisses up her
ankles and legs. Progress to teasing her by gently biting her inner thighs before running
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your tongue up the length of her vagina to her clit and then over her pelvis up to her navel
as you pull yourself up by grabbing her luscious hips. Try alternating between soft kisses
and slow, delicious licks along her torso up to and around her breasts and proceed to her
neck. Once you are finally face to face “wow” her with one last passionate French kiss
Katie came to me with her husband with a desire to have more pleasure-filled sexuality.
Katie also wanted to deal with her inhibitions about expressing herself in a sensual way
with her husband. He complained that she never initiated sex. Katie was attractive but did
not feel comfortable in her body. To address both issues, I advised her to try pole
dancing. She immediately scowled. She was turned off by pornographic depictions of
women involving pole dancing. I understood her feelings. But I discussed with Katie how
she could take steps to reclaim what was once sacred and positive in the phallic dance.
After considering it in this new light, Katie was game to try making pole dancing her
own. The first time Katie tried dancing with the pole she felt the first inklings of
excitement to move her body in a naturally sensual way, and as she did, she felt
increasingly freed from her usual inhibitions. When she stopped dancing that first night,
her body continued to vibrate. A wave of emotion came over her at having discovered a
way back into her own body. As she talked excitedly about learning and practicing more
pole dances, my only advice was that she let her heart lead, then allow her body to
follow. Within a few weeks, she was opening up to her physical body and her sexuality in
a new and confident way. She actually came on to her husband for the very first time.
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"He spins gradually faster, as if by his revolutions he were connecting Heaven and
Earth by actually turning the spirit through himself and down into the ground,
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while his axis and heart remain absolutely still and his own spirit soars to its Divine
Source."
History of Sex
In the ancient Middle East, certain people performed the spiral dance, in which dancers
would spin and twirl around with wild abandon at a frenetic, dizzying pace. For instance,
the whirling Sufis, who are generally believed to have originated shortly after the time of
Muhammad near Basra, practiced their own version of the spiral dance. Their sacred
dances of whirling movement were intended primarily to shed worldly concerns and enter
an ecstatic state.
Turkey—goddess-revering women and men performed the captivating spiral dance of the
labyrinth. The “labyrinth” referred to the intricate journey dancers experienced while
twirling and spinning—spiraling inward to a place deep within their own psyche and then
reaching out to connect intensely and intimately with each other. The intoxicating
winding and unwinding spiral allowed dancers to surrender their ego and embrace their
sexual nature. When spiral dances were performed, they were often combined with sexual
rites.
The ancient spiral dance promoted an inner ecstatic journey as well as eroticism, but in
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creating your own version of the dance, you can choose whether you want to focus solely
on the physical side of the dance or take it to the next level with a more mindful
approach. You and your lover can perform this ritual dance side by side, letting the
pulsating beats of the music drive you both into a delicious frenzy. Giving yourself fully
to the spiral dance inspires you to surrender yourself completely to your innate sexual
energy and to your lover. By shedding every ounce of self-consciousness, you open
A Sufi whirling dervish workshop can show you how to spin and twirl with abandon,
allowing you to lose yourself in the dance and open yourself up to ecstasy. You may also
want to try a “trance dance” class to help you and your partner learn to loosen up and let
go of shyness while you dance. Some trance dance classes involve the use of a blindfold
or a bandanna to cover the eyes. This can actually stimulate the sense of touch to an even
greater degree, making every loving stroke or brush of the hand you and your lover
Look for music with beats that will allow you and your lover to discover your own
undulating rhythm for this sacred dance. Good selections include Middle Eastern world
music and techno sounds if you’d like a more modern feel. Heavy percussion can help
you immerse yourself in the dance and prime you for an extraordinary sexual adventure.
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Dancing the Ecstatic Spiral
In a wide-open room, start slowly, whirling your body with your arms outstretched and
your head reaching back. Close your eyes and feel the beats of the music you’ve chosen
to help you find a natural rhythm as you continue to spin. When you begin to feel your
sense of self dissolve, reach out to touch your partner and feel free to touch your own
body as well to excite you both. If you’re wearing clothes, pull them away or undress
As you dance the spiral in the nude, touch each other’s bare bodies. Men, caress the nape
of her neck, run your hands over her hips, and perhaps let your fingers linger seductively
around her nipples. Women, run your fingers through his hair, touch his face, and let your
hand journey down your lover’s chest and around his waist and penis. This wanton
touching will ignite a sexual fire within you both, turning your dance into an unrestrained
foreplay session.
Slow your whirling so you can pull your lover close and press your pelvises together as
you hold your hands on each other’s hips. Then arch back and resume twirling slowly in
a circle. In this erotic spiral dance position, you will feel your genitals rubbing against
each other, sending tingling sensations throughout your bodies. Gradually move apart,
and alternate spinning seductively alone and then sensually back together losing yourself
in the erotic bliss of the moment. By now, your hearts will be pounding and you will both
Take your ecstatic dancing off the dance floor and continue your spiral love dance on the
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bed. Embrace each other closely as you embark upon a hot, soulful kiss. Prolong the
sensation of twirling by rolling together on the bed, taking turns being on top as you kiss
and touch each other’s erogenous zones. If you’ve both worked up a bit of a sweat during
your dance, you may find it sexy to lick each other from head to toe, savoring the
saltiness of your lover’s skin. That glistening sweat also acts as a great lubricant and can
Making love to parts of her body other than her vagina, such as her breasts or inner
thighs, can be just as exciting and surprising. Your spiral dance ritual is a perfect
Men, have her lean back against the bed’s headboard with a few pillows behind her to
prop her up. Straddle her torso and press her breasts gently around your erect penis.
Simulate the same thrusting motion you would use if you were penetrating her vagina.
The feeling of your penis between her sensitive breasts can create intense pleasure for her
and for you. For many men, the sight of the penis enveloped by the breasts is one of the
most visually exciting sex acts around. Don’t be surprised if this position brings you to
climax quickly.
To slow down the action, roll onto your back so she can take the woman-on-top position.
Women, lower yourself onto his aroused penis and start to move your upper body in big
circles with your head tilted back, as if you were still doing the spiral dance. As your
body moves sensually in this spiral sex dance, press your pelvis into his to stimulate the
sensations in your clitoris to bring you to an intense orgasm. For him, watching you
“spiral dance” with abandon on top of him will surely heighten his arousal and lead him
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With pure water will I cleanse you, and you shall be clean; from all your impurities
will I cleanse you. A new heart will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you.
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Ezekiel 36:25-28
History of Sex
Many ancient peoples viewed the body as a temple to be joyfully cleansed with water.
The Hebrew word mikveh means "gathering of the waters." The mikveh in Jewish
tradition is used as both a symbolic ritual and a practical method to cleanse a woman's
physical body for romance and sexual relations and to mark pivotal moments in her life.
For instance, before a traditional Jewish wedding, the bride has a mikveh where she is
bathed and ceremonially blessed by her close female family and friends. A Jewish man
traditionally uses the purifying bath as a way to cleanse himself of worldly concerns and
prepare for the weekly Sabbath, which he views as the time to express gratitude to God
for his material blessings and to make love with his wife.
During Biblical times, it was believed that by spending time engaged in bathing with
groups of the same sex, men and women strengthened their collective male and female
vigor so that when reunited with their spouses, they were better partners and lovers. In
modern times, the bathing ritual has enjoyed a comeback as a rite for personal renewal
and bonding within couples. For many couples, it is being enthusiastically enjoyed as a
foreplay ritual before lovemaking. Here are some ways to adapt this ancient ritual for
You can make this enchanting bathing ritual your own by following the basic steps
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involved in the traditional mikveh: cleansing your bodies, letting go of everyday
concerns, celebrating the moment, deepening your connection with your lover and
renewing your desire for sex. To take advantage of this incredible ceremony, plan a bath
for the two of you in your own bathtub or in a backyard spa. Take heart that you don’t
need an over-sized tub or Jacuzzi for your ceremony. In fact, a smaller tub may actually
be preferable because it lets you and your lover get even closer to each other. Wherever
your “gathering of the waters” ritual takes place, it will help to put you and your lover at
Make Time
Schedule your bathing ritual as a weekly event or to mark pivotal key moments, such as
—if you have a pressing deadline or some other unresolved issue, it is probably not the
right time. Clear your desk so you’re free to enjoy this love ritual in the water.
Enhance the beauty of your space for the bathing ritual in a way that soothes and inspires
you. Add flower petals or light candles to create a romantic ambience, or keep the space
completely bare so the focus is solely on you and your lover. You may want to have
music playing in the background, such as sultry songs like Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual
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Each person enters the ritual naked. Remove all clothing, makeup, hair gel, lotions,
jewelry, watches and eyeglasses. There should be nothing between your body and the
purifying waters. If possible, shower together first to cleanse your bodies, before
proceeding to the bath. Soap each other up and lather your lover’s hair. Then watch as
your lover seductively rinses it out. Use a mesh sponge to massage the soap into your
lover’s neck, back, shoulders, arms, breasts, belly, hips and inner thighs. The sexy,
tingling sensations produced from the scrub will ignite arousal in your body from head to
toe. Then rinse away the soap from each other’s bodies.
You may also want to take this moment to kneel down in front of your lover as if you
were at the alter of a temple and taste the wetness of your lover’s vagina or penis with
your tongue as the water rains down over the two of you. If you do, you may not make it
to the next stage of the bathing ritual and decide to take your lover right here—an
excellent option. But if you have the willpower to complete the bathing ritual together, it
To begin, step into the ritual water and immerse your whole body. Face each other and
open your legs to each other. You may want to wrap them around your lover or extend
one leg to either side of your lover and place your feet against the bathtub behind them.
This sensational position literally opens you up to each other sexually. It will also offer
you a natural moment to meet each other heart to heart and eye to eye during this ritual.
As you let the warm water envelop your body, let go of what is weighing on your mind
by massaging each other’s temples sensually. Let go of what is weighing on your heart by
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leaning back against the bathtub and letting out a sigh “ahhh”. Let go of what is weighing
on your body by giving each other a teasing foot rub. While rubbing each other’s squeaky
clean feet, you may want to celebrate this moment of togetherness by serenading your
lover to express how you feel about them. If singing isn’t your best talent, perhaps slip
their toes into your mouth and alternate sucking and nibbling on them to show them how
you feel. For many people, the toes are highly sensitive and these irresistible lovebites
will cause a stirring in the erogenous zones as you take this sexy celebration to the next
level.
Throughout this erotic ritual, try to remain leaning back against the tub rather than
clutching each other closely in a passionate embrace. Try to resist kissing each other and
concentrate instead on holding your lover’s gaze the entire time. This idea may sound
like it would take the fun out of the ritual, but it can actually heighten your desire, stir
While leaning back, reach out to caress your lover, connecting with them on both an
emotional and physical level. Men, let your hands massage her ankles, calves, knees and
sensitive inner thighs before exploring her genitals with your fingers. Insert your middle
finger into her vagina and massage her G-spot by making a “come hither” motion while
you press your thumb against her clitoris. This sexy move will get her juices flowing and
will renew her desire for intercourse, one of the goals of the traditional bathing ritual.
Women, place your hands on either side of the tub and raise yourself up so you can lower
down onto his penis, then lean back again as far as is comfortable for him.
Perform gentle pelvic tilts to build sexual excitement. As you tilt your pelvis upward,
contract the muscles within your vagina (the same muscles you would use to stop the
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flow of urine) to tighten the grip on his penis. As you release the tilt, relax your muscles.
Keep contracting and relaxing your muscles to produce an amazing pulsating sensation
for him. This amazing move will spark his sexual vigor, which is another goal of the
Men if you have your feet against the bath behind your lover, lift your hips and use your
legs to move yourself in and out of her vagina, increasing and slowing the speed of your
thrusting in intervals. Remember to continue looking into your lover’s eyes as you bring
your bodies towards each other and then pull them away. Women love this eye lock
because it intensifies the emotional connection, and men find it incredibly erotic when a
Another benefit of this bathing ritual is that the soothing water around you can add a
relaxing element to your lovemaking, encouraging you both to take it slowly. This can
lead to a lengthier sex session that is ultimately more satisfying for you both. After
you’ve both reached sexual ecstasy, you can both relax back into the bath for more
meaningful intimacy.
Lynn felt drawn to the bathing ritual of mikveh even before she and her husband Sam
came up with a plan to mark 35 years of marriage by renewing their vows. Based on her
traditional mikvah. She would invite several women friends to accompany her. Lynn
wanted to cleanse and to let go of any disappointments that had occurred over the life of
her marriage and really open up and celebrate this new era for their relationship. Lynn’s
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friends helped prepare the setting by lighting candles around the mikveh water sanctuary.
Lynn then entered the sanctuary and submerged into the "sacred pool." The women then
gathered around the pool and played their guitars and sang beautiful songs serenading
and honoring Lynn in the celebration of her ritual. Lynn says her mikveh was an amazing
and valuable experience. It allowed her to arrive for her renewal of wedding vows ready
to meet Sam with a clear mind, an open heart and a refreshed body. How romantic!
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Chapter 5
of the Mediterranean
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Intro
Sex, beauty and erotic rituals played a very important role in the ancient civilizations that
arose from the warm, crystal-clear waters of the Mediterranean and Aegean Seas. Set
amid majestic mountains, miles of coastline, and gentle olive tree-lined hillsides, the
ancient Greek and Roman cultures shared a great love for physical beauty and exhibited a
fun, frolicking and free-spirited sexuality. Eroticism and beauty inspired their creativity
and provided an outlet for the Mediterraneans to express a newfound sense of freedom
and self-determination, two ideals that formed the foundation of Greek society and
eventually all of Western civilization. To fully access their sense of freedom and creative
juices, men and women of these ancient societies engaged together in rituals that were
meant to provoke, inspire, celebrate and indulge their sensual and sexual nature.
Although there are no written records from the advanced Minoan civilization that existed
imagery on frescoes, pottery and sculpture have led historians to believe that the people
were joyous, sensuous and peace loving. They worshipped a goddess—a voluptuous
mother earth and mistress of animals—who took many forms, such as a snake goddess, a
butterfly goddess and a bird goddess. In the form of a snake goddess, she was typically
depicted in their artwork with very ample, exposed breasts. Joining the sexy snake
goddess in Minoan mythology were male gods, such as the virile solar bull god, who
represented potent male sexuality. To honor these deities, the ancient Minoans are
believed to have cavorted in fertility-inspired sexual fantasy rituals during which the men
and women pretended to be animals having sex. The men would wear bull masks and the
women would wear cow masks while they unleashed their wild, animal nature with erotic
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dancing and intercourse.
Equally decadent festivals focusing on delicious carnal pleasures took place throughout
the illustrious history of ancient Greece and Italy, starting in about the 6th century BC. For
instance, the Etruscans of Central Italy celebrated the infamous Bacchanalian feast and
introduced it to Rome in about 200 BC. These decadent, playful feasts typically involved
mouthwatering dining, merry drinking, arousing music and uninhibited sexual activity.
Thrown in honor of Greek and Roman deities and to celebrate seasonal holidays, these
erotic parties involved male and female revelers feeding each other, playing games and
watching each other engage in sexual relations before joining in the action. Men and
women would freely engage in what modern-day people would call partner swapping.
In other parts of the ancient Mediterranean, sexuality was expressed in erotic body art
and sculpture. Ancient Greeks created artwork to depict their intense appreciation for the
magnificence of the nude body—both male and female. Beginning in the 5th century BC,
many ancient Greek sculptures depicted naked gods, goddesses and mortals. For
exquisitely stunning and sensual pieces of artwork in all of history. The male penis was
also glorified in the ancient world and was prominently displayed in its erect and flaccid
form in artwork that could be found on nearly every building and in every home. With
erotic art so prevalent in society, Mediterraneans were always primed for a steamy sexual
encounter.
The ancient world’s reverence for beauty went beyond art. For Romans around 300 BC, it
also translated to beautification rituals performed to make their own bodies as gorgeous
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as possible. In an effort to entice and attract the opposite sex, Roman women and men
went to great lengths to look seductive and desirable. Roman women created elaborate
hairstyles featuring soft curls and used alluring cosmetics, tempting perfumes, ornate
jewelry and revealing clothing to make themselves irresistible to men. Roman men paid
close attention to personal hygiene, visiting gyms and spas for treatments that would
make them more appealing to their wives and lovers. With this reverence for physical
beauty, the act of preparing oneself for a date with a lover or a hot night of passion
Adopting these ancient Mediterranean mating and sex rituals to your modern bedroom
can be easy and fun. For instance, you can borrow from the sexually charged Minoan
fertile fantasies in which participants would dress up like animals and have sex. You can
be inspired by this to engage in a hot primal sexual fantasy of your own. By adopting
from the decadent playful feasts of the ancient Italians, you can prepare aphrodisiacs and
feast on your lover’s body as dessert. In the way the ancient Greeks expressed their
sexuality in their artwork, you can use sensual body paints to create erotic body art on
your lover to get you in the mood for artistic sex. And just as the ancient Romans adorned
Fertile Fantasies
History of Sex
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On the island of Crete, wild sex rituals were performed as a way to help the people
understand the mysteries of fertility. Because the ancient Minoans didn’t fully grasp the
workings of human fertility, they didn’t connect sexual intercourse with procreation. In
fact, they believed that women were the sole source and creators of babies, which may be
why females were so highly regarded in Minoan society. The Minoans, however, did feel
an intimate connection with animals and they routinely observed snakes, monkeys, birds,
lions and cows mating. The Minoans, who referred to their goddess as the “Mistress of
the Animals,” sensed that there was some connection between animals and the mystery of
fertility, which is what inspired the Cretan fertile fantasy sex rituals.
Daily Minoan life was filled with erotic tension. The lovely women of the island of Crete
enjoyed showing off their fertile femininity by wearing tight-fitting bodices to emphasize
the luscious curves of their breasts, which they exposed for all to see. Men also dressed in
scanty attire, wearing only loincloths that left little to the imagination. However during
erotic festivities, the sexual heat would become more intense. The men would strap on
bull masks, and the women slipped on cow masks for the night-time festivities, during
which they danced and writhed like snakes, activating their wild sexual imaginations.
Taking these fertile fantasies a step further, the Minoans allowed their primal sexual
nature to emerge, and libido-charged men began hunting the alluring women, who
delighted in the chase. As the sexual tension mounted, the aroused animal masked men
This sexual ritual is ripe with sexual potential for the modern couple. Call on the powers
of fantasy and animal behavior to bring out your wild side in bed.
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Fertile Fantasies—Make It Your Own
Take a cue from the Minoan civilization and dare to act out some of your own fertile
fantasies while calling on your primal instincts. Whether you’ve always wondered what it
would be like to make love in public or have exciting, wild sex outside of your comfort
zone, you and your lover can choose to tell your sexual fantasies to one another while
having sex to make it even wilder or dare each other to act them out. There’s no doubt
that a thrilling adventure into the world of sexual fantasy can add a whole new dimension
to your lovemaking.
Spend a sexy evening with your lover sharing your secret sexual fantasies. Revealing
your secret desires to your beloved takes courage but know that doing so can enhance
intimacy as well as your libido. You may find that simply talking about your private
fantasies will arouse you both. It’s possible that you and your lover may not share all of
the same fantasies, or that you may have some fantasies that one of you isn’t willing to
enact. As long as you can agree on at least one new and exciting sexual adventure, you
are set for some primal pleasure. For instance, you may both be turned on by one of the
If you and your lover are excited by the risk involved in having sex in a public setting,
choose a location that you both find thrilling, whether it’s on top of a building or on the
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beach. Plan your sexual escapade for a time of day when you are least likely to get caught
“in flagrante.” Wear clothing that will arouse your lover and facilitate your outdoor
adventure. Women, wear a skirt that is easy to pull up for wild intercourse when the
mood and the right time strikes. You may also want to go without panties for your fertile
fantasy. The slight breeze you will feel between your legs without underwear is sure to
make your vagina tingle. Going “au naturel” will also add to the primal nature of your
fantasy ritual, making you feel more sexually free. It also allows for quick access, which
can be important when copulating in public. Men, choose garments that are easy to
remove—pants without belts and shoes you can easily slip off are best. You may also
want to experience the thrilling sensation of going without your boxers or briefs, which
Head to your fantasy location together or arrange to rendezvous in your secret spot.
Hand-in-hand with your lover, seek out a setting that's conducive to lovemaking. On the
beach, that may be an area that’s shielded by rocks or dunes. On a rooftop or a hotel
balcony, a railing may supply the ideal support for wild, animalistic lovemaking. If
you’re at a party or social event, you might close yourselves in a bathroom or a guest
With so much anticipation building up until this point as well as the sense of danger
you’ll be feeling, you can bet that you will both be breathing hard and tingling all over.
Kiss each other passionately, allowing your tongue to explore your lover’s mouth. Let
your hands roam up and down each other’s bodies as you press closer to each other.
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Women, let your hand slide down from his chest to his pants and rub his penis through
his clothing. Since he isn’t wearing any underwear, this should get him aroused quickly.
Men, cup her breasts with both hands and bury your face in her cleavage, letting your lips
Men, lift up her skirt and feel her sexual juices as you rub your fingers against her labia
and then insert one or maybe two into her vagina. Move your fingers in and out of her
vagina to stimulate her and increase the wetness. Then shift your fingers to her clitoris
and massage her until she is about to orgasm. If she requires clitoral stimulation for
orgasm, you may want to bring her to climax now to ensure her pleasure.
Women, unbutton or unzip your lover’s pants and push your hand inside to touch his
penis. Rub your hand along the shaft and down to his testicles. Massage them while he is
caressing you and then run your hand up and down his shaft. While you manually
stimulate each other, you will probably be tempted to keep an eye out for anyone in the
vicinity, which can add to the excitement that’s building between you.
Let your primal instincts guide you from here. Men, imagine that you’re a wild bear or a
charging bull and take your lover sexually. If you’re on a rooftop or hotel balcony up
against a railing, turn her around so she’s facing away from you and have her bend over
the railing so you can enter her from behind and mount her with the passion and
momentum of beautiful animals in the wild having sex. This position offers deep
penetration for him and massages her G-spot, which can lead to a lusty climax for her. To
a passerby below, it may simply look like the two of you are enamored, gazing out at the
vista.
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Their Sunset Fantasy Story
Jack had many sexual fantasies that he had never shared with Laura because he was
afraid that she might disapprove. The fertile fantasies of the Minoan civilization gave him
the courage to bring up the subject with Laura, and to his surprise, he discovered that she
had a very active sexual imagination of her own. They spent an enjoyable morning
describing their fantasies to each other in bed and ended up creating a juicy one together.
They made a plan to actually make it happen. The next weekend Jack, an experienced
sailor, rented a sailboat at a nearby marina. Jack and Laura set sail for an afternoon
adventure. The first part of the fantasy required total nudity once they were out at sea.
The idea was to have nothing separating their bodies from the elements of sea, sun and
breeze that would produce a natural physical arousal. They buttered each other with sun
tan oil and settled in for a couple of hours on deck of luscious tanning, touching and oral
sex. The typically conservative couple found the threat of another boat passing close by
very stimulating. Just before sunset, after having experienced such delicious extended
foreplay, they felt completely aroused, relaxed and open to more. At the highest point on
deck Jack leaned her back against the mast below the billowing sail and entered her. They
made passionate love to each other with the wind blowing through their hair and the sun
History of Sex
In ancient Roman and Greek times, decadent feasts held in honor of lusty and gorgeous
gods and goddesses often transformed into wild orgies. Take the Etruscan festivals called
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the Bacchanalia, for instance. Held for the god of wine Bacchus, these events attracted
the Central Italian society’s elite. Men and women of honorable stature discarded their
everyday robes for these erotic festivals in favor of dressing in sexy, revealing animal
skins. In their alluring attire, the Etruscans drank lustily and sensually fed each other
succulent meats, fruits, cheeses and sweets. The raucous celebrants also played
provocative games, in which the men and women would exchange clothing, seductively
disrobing and then dressing in a strangers clothing to turn each other on.
Eventually, the partygoers shed all of their garments as well as their sexual inhibitions.
After they were completely nude, the feasting revelers turned their attentions to each
other. Men and women partook of each other sexually while other celebrants watched
with voyeuristic pleasure. The intensely aroused Etruscans considered these celebrations
a commitment-free zone and men and women were equally free to enjoy partner-
To get a taste of decadent playful feasts, it is not necessary to engage in partner swapping
unless that appeals to you. You can recreate your own intimate orgy just for the two of
you. Simply focus in on the feasting aspect of the festivities. Prepare aphrodisiacs and
spread delectable foods on each other’s bodies that can be licked off or sensuously
nibbled on. A sexy feast is an ideal prelude to orgasmic and delicious oral sex and a night
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They seek their delight together.
Lorenzo De Medici
You can infuse the erotic and fun essence of the Bacchanalian playful feasts into your
own lovemaking rituals. Just like the Etruscans did thousands of years ago, you and your
lover can savor delectable foods and fine wines before you feast on each other. When you
combine the sensual pleasures of eating with lovemaking, you will have a mouth-
Feast on Aphrodisiacs
Named for the Greek goddess of love, Aphrodite, aphrodisiacs have been used for
thousands of years to ignite the libido and intensify sexual pleasure. These potent love
tonics include a vast array of delicious foods, herbs, spices and drinks. Many delicacies
considered aphrodisiacs are foods you may already have in your kitchen, such as
love juices taste even better), asparagus, cucumbers, bananas, avocados, tomatoes (called
“love apples” in ancient times), nutmeg, vanilla, honey and basil. Tasty and tantalizing
tidbits that may require a trip to a gourmet market include oysters, mussels, caviar and
truffles. Partaking in some of these delectables can help put you and your lover in the
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Prepare a Feast
Sometimes, you can have almost as much fun preparing your erotic banquet as you can
consuming it. Consider cooking in the nude to arouse your sexual appetite or dress
scantily, wearing nothing more than an apron, a short nighty or some pajama pants. Like
the Italians who swapped clothing during their Bacchanalian feasts, you can choose to be
cheeky and dress in each other’s clothes. As you slice and dice foods, feed each other
little nibbles with your fingers and then lick any last flavors from each other’s lips.
Women, if you’re including aphrodisiacs like bananas in your feast, take advantage of
their phallic shape to give your lover a demonstration of what he can expect later. Unpeel
the banana slowly and sensuously, run your tongue up and down the banana and circle its
tip with your tongue. While holding your lover’s gaze, seductively place your lips around
the banana and slide it deep into your mouth. Pull it out and, take a little bite out of the
end and then offer a taste of it to your man. Men, give your lover a hint of what you’ll be
doing to her later by dipping your forefinger and middle finger into some honey or a bowl
of whipped cream and sucking them. Run your lips up and down your fingers as you taste
the sweet nectar, flicking your tongue on the tips of your fingers as she watches you.
When your decadent feast is ready, arrange your aphrodisiacs on a table or spread your
succulent buffet on a blanket on the floor. Forget about utensils – it’s fingers only for this
luscious and sensual dining experience. Pour some wine or a nonalcoholic beverage so
you can drink like the ancient revelers did at the Bacchanalia festivals. Dim the lights,
and put on some sexy music that moves you both as you begin your feasting ritual.
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Feast on Your Lover’s Body as Dessert
Feed each other, licking off your lover’s tasty fingers after each morsel. Savor each and
every bite of food, enjoying the flavors, textures and smells as you consume them. Take
one of the fruits, such as a strawberry and place it partially in your lover’s mouth with
your fingers then lean in and take a bite yourself so your lips meet as you bite down into
the juicy fruit. Gently nibble each other’s lips to catch any remnants of the strawberry.
You can also take a long lick of caviar from a spoon and place your caviar-coated tongue
When you’re ready to shift the focus from feasting on the foods to feasting on each other,
slip out of your clothes and consider beginning with a sweet game. Just like the ancient
people liked to play sensually charged games at decadent festivals, you can have fun with
some provocative games, too. For example, you can play a sexy match of tic-tac-toe on
your lover’s body, drawing lines with chocolate sauce and placing strawberries or
raspberries to represent the “O” and two criss-crossed pineapple slices to symbolize the
If she wins, men, pour a trail of warm chocolate or spray whipped cream on her body
leading from the neck and down the chest to around her breasts and nipples. Use your
tongue to lap up the sweetness and suck gently on her nipples to excite her. Turn up the
heat on your body as dessert ritual by trickling the syrupy stimulant down her belly onto
her inner thighs. Remember that sugar can encourage the growth of bacteria and yeast, so
it’s best to avoid drizzling sweets directly on her vagina. Starting at her tummy, lick your
way slowly to her tastiest spot. Linger on her inner thighs, kissing, sucking and nibbling
while your hands wander up and down from her hips to her knees.
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If you want to try something really new, place her in a swing that hangs from your
bedroom ceiling and kneel between her legs and gently spread her labia. Slowly lick the
tender tissue around her clitoris while you grip her hips. Slowly push her away and pull
her toward you in the swing, teasing her with your tongue each time she’s pulled toward
you. Let your tongue slip down into her vagina and feast on her delicious nectar. Move
your tongue up to her clitoris and circle your tongue around it. Bring your lips around it
and suck ever so gently, paying close attention to her reactions and pulling away if the
sensation is too intense for her. Rub your tongue directly on her clitoris, licking it in slow
strokes at first. When she begins writhing in pleasure, speed up the tempo. Or move your
tongue back inside to stimulate her G-spot located approximately a couple of inches from
the opening of her vagina on the top wall, utilizing a come hither tongue motion until she
Women, after you’ve climaxed, turn your attention to your lover. Drizzle one of your
favorite aphrodisiacs on your man’s chest and abdomen, then lick him clean, stopping to
nibble on his nipples. Make another tasty trail that leads from his feet to his inner thighs,
savor it with enthusiasm. In general, you can put delectables like whipped cream directly
on the penis as long as you don’t insert it into the opening, so go ahead and douse your
Sit on the swing while he stands in front of you with his erect penis about the same height
as your mouth. Push yourself forward and back slightly, running your tongue up and
down his erect shaft, savoring the taste. After you’ve consumed the aphrodisiacs off of
his penis, circle your tongue around the head as you grasp the base with your hand. You
may want to add some honey onto your hand to make it glide more smoothly up and
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down his penis while your mouth is centered on the head. Place your lips over the head
and suck and flitter your tongue while your hand continues to work up and down
rhythmically. As you take more of his penis in your mouth, use your tongue to lick the
sweetness, a move that will intensify his pleasure. Continue in this way until he reaches a
delicious orgasm. After you’ve both reached climax, you can continue your decadent
History of Sex
A fascination for the beauty of the nude human body is evident in the erotic body art of
ancient Greece. Stunning sculptures were created to honor the gods and goddesses, but
they were also a way for Greeks to appreciate and glorify the male and female form.
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Nude sculptures, such as those of Aphrodite, represented the ideal female form and
The Greeks’ interest in the human form also included an intense fascination with the
phallus, a symbol so common in ancient artwork that it could be seen almost everywhere
in major cities. For instance, architectural pillars featuring penis sculptures could be
found throughout the ancient world. These artworks were the Mediterraneans’ first sex
symbols and natural sexual enhancers for its citizens. Nude satyrs—always depicted with
erect penises—were commonly painted and etched on vases and frescoes as a symbol of
male sexual potency. The seductive female form was equally prevalent throughout the
ancient Mediterranean, arousing appreciation and sexual desire in all those walking by.
You can show your appreciation for your lover’s body and sexuality with your own brand
of erotic body art. If you have an artistic flair, consider painting nude portraits of each
other as a unique prelude to sex. Or simply use body paints to express your passion for
one another by sensually brushing luscious, liquid paint all over each other. In creating
your erotic masterpiece upon your lover, you will tease and arouse each other’s bodies
You don’t have to be a trained artist to create your own erotic body art. In fact, it doesn’t
matter if you can’t even draw a straight line. All you need is a willingness to express your
appreciation for your lover’s beautiful nude body. Whether you choose to paint a portrait
of your beloved in the buff or to spread colorful body paints all over each other, you will
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uncover a sense of creativity that will infuse your lovemaking with originality and
inspiration. On a physical level, body painting involves a lot of sensual touching that will
send electrifying feelings throughout your bodies, turning up your anticipation and
enjoyment of sex.
When it comes to body paints, you have many options. Head to any adult store or surf the
web to find a palette of pleasurable possibilities. Among your many choices are glow-in-
the-dark paints, black-light paints and edible body paints. Edible varieties come in a
number of delectable flavors, including blueberry, grape, banana, lemon, cherry, lime and
chocolate. You may want to try several of these yummy paints for a sensual and oral
delight. Remember that some edible body paints aren’t flavored and don’t taste good. For
artistic types who want to paint a portrait of your lover, you can use the body paints or
To apply body paints, you can use all sorts of materials, including paintbrushes, sponges,
feathers, flower petals and even your fingers. Consider using a variety of these objects for
your erotic body art session because the different textures will create a variety of
sensations that will titillate your lover and heighten their enjoyment. For instance, the
sensation of the fine brush hairs can be very stimulating while the touch of a feather
If you want to get really creative with your artwork, you can also use body painting
transfers and stencils to design intricate butterflies, hearts, wings, flowers, stars, dragons
and more. Don’t feel like you have to draw something spectacular, though. In fact, it
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really doesn’t matter what you paint. The main idea is to use a lot of different textures
and strokes to tantalize your lover’s body. Expressing your sexy artistic vision of your
Before you begin your erotic masterpiece, lay down an old sheet on the floor, the bed or
wherever you plan to have your passionate painting party. Place all of your luscious
paints and your array of brushes and other titillating application objects where you can
easily reach them. You may want to put a few damp washcloths or a towel nearby in case
you want to wipe away a painted image and start over. Get in the mood for your creative
and artistic encounter with the right lighting and mood music that inspires you.
Just as the nude body was the focus of the artwork in ancient Greece, your naked bodies
should be the canvas for your sexy creation. Both of you should shed all of your clothing,
doing a slow striptease for each other to get things started. As you both strip, strike
seductive poses, the way a model would for an artist. This can make you both feel sexy
Embrace your role as a sultry artist and have your lover either stand or lie down for your
painting ritual. Standing allows you to paint your lover on all sides without smearing the
paint. Think of what you’d like to paint that will symbolize your immediate sexual and
loving feeling for your lover—it can be as simple as a delicate flower that represents her
genitalia or as elaborate as your imagination allows, such as intricate wings on his back
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and shoulders or flames upon his hips and around his penis, representing a heavenly lover
on fire sexually. If you don’t want to create a specific image, you can just make a series
of shapes, such as wavy lines, circles, arrows and zigzags that will be very arousing. You
can also use this erotic body art ritual to express something in writing on your lover’s
body, such as a single word like “Lover” or “Orgasmic” that expresses your limitless
adoration. Or you can write a steamy poem that starts on one side of the body and goes
around to the other side or that goes up one limb and down the other.
Whatever enticing image you choose to portray, take your time and make the experience
as sensual as possible. Apply the paint to as many areas of the body as possible to
increase the pleasure for your lover. Try starting with your lover’s hands and arms.
Choose one of your brushes, dip it in the paint and use broad, firm strokes that go from
the hand, up the arm, over the shoulder and onto the neck. Using that same brush, shift to
the opposite shoulder and trail the brush down the arm onto the hand, this time using a
light touch that will make your lover’s body come sexually alive. .
Now take another object, such as a flower petal, and dip it in the paints. Starting at the
feet, touch the petal ever so lightly against your lover’s skin and brush it in fluttery
touches up the legs. Take the petal around to the sensitive area behind the knees and then
up the thighs with quick flicks. With the wet dripping flower petal barely touching their
Use your fingers next to apply long passionate streaks of paint, swirling them in long,
teasing waves over their back and around the torso to their chest. Move your index finger
to their forehead and trace a bold painted line down their nose to the Cupid’s bow above
their lips. Then lift your finger and start again at their chin, making your way down the
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neck. Men, trace the curves of her breasts and circle around her nipples but don’t touch
them yet, making her yearn even more for that artistic touch. Women, do the same to
your man, letting your fingers work around his pecs but refrain from touching. In this
indulgent ritual, it’s best to let your lover’s anticipation build before you paint the
erogenous zones.
Then reach for the feather. Dip it gently into the paint so it only gets a hint of color. This
will help keep the individual feathers separate, which will produce the most tantalizing
sensations and emotions. Retrace the painted areas of your lover’s body, barely letting the
feather caress the skin. This produces an exquisite feeling, awakening tingling pleasure
throughout the body. With the feather, tickle your lover’s nipples and watch them
respond. Hover the feather, letting it brush ever so slightly on their skin as you pass it
down their belly and onto their thighs. By now, your lover will be aching for you with
intense desire. You can take each other now but if you can hold off the mounting passion
and trade roles so your lover can paint your body, it will be well worth the wait.
As you paint each other, you will become so highly aroused that you will be tempted to
paint your lover’s genitals. In general, body paints can be safely applied to the penis, but
they aren’t intended for internal use so avoid placing them on the vagina. And if you do
get creative with some artwork on your lover’s penis, make sure that he washes it with
When you can’t hold back any longer, wash your hands with soap and water and then let
the passion take over. First stand back and admire your sexy creations. You may also
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want to stand side by side in front of a mirror admiring your lover’s creative vision on
your body. Watch each other become more and more aroused by the way each of your
bodies look. Right in front of the mirror, men, sit down on the floor or bed with your legs
crossed. Women, sit on his lap facing him with your legs wrapped around his back and
lower yourself onto his erect penis so that it places indirect pressure on your clitoris and
stimulates the back of your vagina. Hold onto each other’s shoulders or torso as you rock
back and forth and make circles together. With this face-to-face position, you can
continue to savor the beauty of your lover’s nude body as it undulates with intense
pleasure. In addition, this delicious position allows her to stimulate her genitals against
Use your mirror to admire your artistry and use what you see to increase your hot
physical movements. Women, turn around into a squat position with hands down at the
side and your back facing his torso. Use your thighs and arm strength to move up and
down on your lover’s erect penis. Men, grab her lower waist and hips to help her move in
this hot sensual way. Feel your arousal reaching higher as you watch your sexual
movements in the mirror. Men, you may want to push her gently onto all fours and take
her from behind activating intense sexual stimulation for your penis and another exciting
angle for viewing your artistic sex. Men, keep penetrating, changing your strokes
between deep and shallow, until you both cry out in orgasm catching each other’s eyes as
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Reverence for Beauty
History of Sex
Revered for her exquisite beauty, the goddess of love Venus represented the ideal woman
in ancient Roman society. Mere mortal women in ancient Mediterranean times primped
to tempt their husbands and lovers. Just like modern women today, the women of the
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ancient world used lotions, potions and perfumes to make themselves look sexier and
more attractive to the opposite sex. Women used ancient versions of curling irons and
hair extensions, along with wigs and hairpins to fashion exquisitely elaborate and alluring
hairstyles. In addition, they used hair dyes and bleaches to give their manes a reddish tint
Ancient Roman women also used a variety of cosmetics and skin care products to
enhance their feminine appearance. Sensual substances, such as honey and olive oil, were
used to moisturize the skin and give it a lustrous sheen. Fragrant oils dabbed on the neck,
wrists and other intimate areas of the body gave the women an intoxicating scent.
Powders were used to lighten the face, eyes were outlined with shadows, cheeks were
touched with a form of blush and lips were brushed with a mix of bees wax, olive oil and
unwanted hair by dripping hot candle wax onto their inner thighs—very similar to
Roman men took equal pride in their appearance, grooming themselves to be as desirable
as possible. To the delight of their wives and lovers, Roman men shaved their beards,
creating a smooth and infinitely more kissable face. Some men took hair removal even
further, and it’s said that Julius Caesar routinely had his chest hairs plucked to make his
nude torso even more attractive. Roman men also made it a practice to visit gyms, where
they exercised their bodies to improve their muscle tone and strength, something that
gave them more stamina in the bedroom. Spas offered men a wide variety of sensual
treatments—from hair styling to rub-downs—that made the sexy Romans feel and look
more virile.
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Just as the ancient Roman men and women tried to make themselves as attractive as
possible, you and your lover can enjoy the sensual pleasures of beautification. By
spending the time to make your hair, skin, fingernails and the rest of your body gorgeous,
you will arouse your mate and will feel infinitely sexier. When you feel and look like a
dazzling god or goddess, you can turn up the sexual heat rapidly for a fast and furious
quickie or a long and luxurious sex ritual with great feasting for each other’s eyes.
Turn an ordinary evening with your mate into an extraordinary sexual encounter by
demonstrating your own reverence for beauty. Men and women, create your own
beautification ritual to make everything from your head to your toes look stunning. And
don’t forget to slip into something that’s outrageously sexy, such as crotchless underwear
or a garter belt for her. With your enhanced appearance, you will arouse your mate and
will feel infinitely sexier. And that means your evening will start out with the both of you
already on “hot”.
When you first lay eyes on your lover for your special evening, take the time to
appreciate how beautiful they look and be generous with your admiration. Letting your
beloved know that you find them irresistibly attractive increases confidence and is likely
to make them more adventurous when it comes time for lovemaking. If your lover tends
to be a bit stingy with compliments, point out some of the things they might find
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attractive. For example, a woman might say, “I wore my hair down the way you always
ask me to. Do you like it?” A man might point out that “I put on your favorite cologne.
How does it smell?” Most likely, this will elicit a favorable response, which can set the
As you’re out for your date, women can give a lover fleeting glimpses of your sexy
lingerie. In the car or in the backseat of the cab, shift your blouse to reveal a peek at your
breasts and your sexy bra. While seated across from him, cross and uncross your legs
(remember that famous scene from Basic Instinct with Sharon Stone?) to give him a view
of your lingerie or of your finely groomed vagina if you’re wearing crotchless panties.
This will excite him and will make you both envision the wild sex you will be having
later.
Touch each other often with quick caresses that arouse and tease your lover. Men, touch
her hair as you tell her how beautiful it looks, or run your fingers up her smooth legs as
you’re seated next to each other. Women, when no one is looking, grab his buttocks or
place your hand fleetingly on his pants directly over his penis. These not-so-innocent
touches will have you both juiced up and ready for the throes of passion when you finally
Once you are in private, you will already be geared up for sex. That’s because the
reverence for beauty ritual is actually a sort of extended foreplay that gets you in the
mood. In fact, you may only make it inside the front door before you start tearing off
Men, push your lover up against the wall and kiss her passionately. Pull her hair gently as
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your tongues dance in each other’s mouths. Run one hand up to caress a luscious breast
while you place the other arm around her waist and pull her tightly toward you. Feel her
back arch and her hips meet yours as she moans in pleasure. Unbutton or unzip her
clothing and let it drop to the ground but have her keep her high heels on. Take a step
back and admire how delicious she looks in her lingerie as you shed your shirt and pants.
Give her a moment to take in your gorgeous appearance before you drop your underwear
to the floor. Let her keep her sexy lingerie on as you move back in for another passionate
kiss. Push her bra over a bit to reveal her hardened nipples and rub them with your
fingers before moving your mouth down to lick and suck on them.
Women, move one hand down to grab onto his erect penis and press it up against your
vagina, indirectly stimulating your clitoris. Lift one of your legs up to wrap around his
thigh or waist and grind your pelvis into his erotically. Men, push her panties to the side,
or if she’s wearing crotchless underwear, just enter her vagina for some thrilling
intercourse. Women, you may feel so hot by now that you’ll want to move your hand
down to stimulate your clitoris while he thrusts, pushing you against the wall.
Men, pick her up with both arms holding her below her buttocks while she wraps both
legs around you as you penetrate her. Keep thrusting as she leans back in pleasure and
admire how unbelievably amazing she looks with her breasts spilling out of her lingerie.
To help bring her to orgasm, rotate your hips and circle your penis around inside of her as
you firmly hold her hips with your palms. This will drive her wild. With your passions
ignited so deeply, it won’t take long before you are both experiencing the most exquisite
sexual pleasure. After you have both reached orgasm, take time to notice how beautiful
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Their Dressing for Sex Story
Ted was notorious for getting into bed in old t-shirts while Ann generally wore pajamas
and a facial mask. Their dress code did not lend itself to sexual desire—in fact, it made
them move a couple of feet away from each other in bed, which lowered the chances of
making love. My suggestion to them was to try getting into bed dressed for sex as least a
few times a week. They each discussed the way they would like their lover to look in bed.
The next week, they both kept their commitment to dress for sex. Both took a shower
before bed, washing with a scented soap that would be attractive to the other. Ann came
to bed completely nude with her hair brushed out in waves instead of pulled back in a
headband, and she didn’t wear the facial mask. She also threw on a seductive necklace
Ted had bought for her that hung down just between her breasts.
Ted washed his dark hair and brushed it back wet, shaved his face smooth and put on a
sexy pair of underwear and nothing else, giving him a very Italian look, which he knew
turned her on. That night, their reverence for beautifying themselves naturally lent itself
to wanting to be very close to each other in bed and yes, having yummy sex.
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Chapter Six
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Intro
The 12th century AD ushered in a glorious age of chivalry, romance and courtly love to
Medieval Europe. At the heart of this movement were the legendary chivalrous knights,
who spawned the tale of Lancelot and Guinevere and fought noble battles throughout the
land in the name of Christianity. The knights’ primary mission was to wage war against
infidels. Their quest for victory on the battlefield, however, was surpassed by one thing:
their desire for true love. In fact, these valiant soldiers of God believed that love was the
Because love was so important to them, these heroic knights sought inspiring ways to
woo the ladies they desired. They discovered a number of such enchanting romantic
customs, including a lofty reverence for women, a passion for poetry and a fondness for
ceremony, on their epic journeys throughout the exotic worlds of Eastern Christendom
and Arabia. When the courageous knights returned from these expeditions to the
Romanesque stone castles of feudal Europe, they brought many of these passionate
A knight would use these newfound romantic arts to profess his affection and to win the
heart of the damsel he desired. Just as he had to be courageous in the theater of war, he
had to be equally brave in the arena of love, boldly expressing his feelings to his fair
lady. His chivalrous conduct, gallant gestures and refinement signified the heart of the
lover, which was believed to be a knight’s true nature. By fully embracing his role as a
lover, a knight could prove himself worthy of a lady’s admiration, which would, in turn,
One of the most expressive ways a knight could convey his devotion to a woman was
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through love poetry, one of the amorous arts the knights first encountered in Arabia. As
the Middle Ages progressed, knights and ladies both would try their hand at writing
poetry that explored the depths of their desire for their beloved. These revealing lyric
verses were set to music and sung by troubadours for the kings, queens, knights and
ladies of the royal court. The alluring tales of unrequited love and true love found were so
enticing that they served as a form of poetic foreplay for the knights and ladies, who
could hardly wait to consummate their intense desire for each other.
This newly heightened interest in the subject of courting love eventually developed into
court games, in which knights and ladies would engage in impassioned discussions about
the psychology of love and the proper ways to behave in various romantic situations.
According to some sources, this evolved into what was known as “Courts of Love”, in
which suitors would approach the queen of the court to solicit advice on romantic affairs.
In the field of court games and love, the fairer sex definitely had the upper hand during
the Middle Ages. It was the women who set the rules for all of their court games and who
decided how suitors should conduct themselves and what deeds they would have to
perform in order to win a lady’s favor. By setting the ground rules, these fair maidens
romances, in which heroic knights had to overcome obstacle after obstacle to slay evil
monsters and thereby, win the favor of their lady. The knights’ thrill of exploration
spilled over into their love lives, inspiring them to experiment with passionate
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Let the chivalry and gallantry of the Middle Ages serve as inspiration for your own love
life. Men, take a cue from the knights of the 12th century and win over the woman you
adore by throwing yourself courageously into your intimate encounters with the heart of
the lover. Continue following the knights’ lead by experimenting with new and exciting
ways to woo your beloved. For example, try using powerful poetic foreplay as a way to
ignite her desire. Women, you can follow the example of the fair ladies of the Middle
Ages by creating a courting love ritual that lets you take the reins in the romance
department. And like a chivalrous knight, men, you can set out on an exploratory quest—
only instead of seeking to slay dragons, the goal of your pursuit can be adventurous sex
History of Sex
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In medieval times, knights made valiant efforts to prove to their ladies that they
possessed the heart of the lover. Being perceived as a lover elevated a knight in a
woman’s eyes, increasing his chances of winning her favor. Because of this, brave
knights would put their whole heart into their romantic pursuits. They would go to great
lengths to court the woman they desired, acting as chivalrous as possible and performing
gallant deeds for her. These brave men were more than willing to put their hearts on the
line to find true love. By showing this much courage as a lover, a knight would often win
a lady’s affection.
The courageous courting rituals that demonstrated the heart of the lover of those 12th
century knights have modern-day applications, too. Men and women today can learn and
benefit from the act of wholeheartedly pursuing your lover. By having the courage to
express your passion for your romantic partner both emotionally and physically, you are
“No knight can be brave unless he is in love, love gives the knight his courage.”
All you need to create your own heart of the lover ritual is courage—courage to pursue a
loved one, courage to open up emotionally to your lover during sex and courage to
increase the heat in your lovemaking. Whether you’re a man or a woman, you can call on
this courage to fuel your passion and take your sexual interludes to new, emotionally
charged heights.
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Give Yourself Wholeheartedly to Lovemaking
For your heart of the lover ritual, you’ll need to give yourself wholeheartedly to your
sexual and emotional relationship with your lover. If you’re like a lot of people, you may
feel reluctant to put your heart on the line when it comes to romance because it makes
you feel vulnerable. Rather than shielding your heart out of fear of rejection, have the
courage to take the plunge by relaxing any tension in your chest as you embrace and open
your heart completely. Instead of guarding your feelings, be willing to share your
emotions and your body with your beloved by approaching your lover without hesitation,
expressing your tremendous passion and allowing your whole body to melt into theirs.
For inspiration, think of the way those medieval knights courageously put all of their
efforts into winning the heart of a lady and make a supreme effort to woo the one you
love. Consider how an Olympian is focused on a singular goal and pursue the object of
your desire with the same sort of discipline. Think of how a firefighter races into a
burning building when everybody else is running away from it and have the courage to
leap headlong into an emotionally charged sexual relationship. When you give yourself
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medieval knight. Being emotionally courageous during sex, however, doesn’t mean that
you have to talk about your feelings while you make love. In fact, you can say a whole lot
more with your eyes, mouth and body than you can with words. Use your body to
communicate your emotions to her—pull her warm body close to yours, lock eyes with
her as you kiss her passionately and stroke her hair lovingly. Peel away her clothing
slowly, undoing her top so it falls away to reveal her sexy shoulders. Give her gentle love
bites on her shoulders as you unhook her bra to expose her bare breasts. Like a knight,
express your intense admiration for her with your eyes and with tender caresses and
Keep pulling off her clothing and your own until you are both completely nude. Worship
your lady by letting your loving touch and gentle kisses roam over her entire body. By
expressing your deep appreciation for her, you will ignite her desire. When your
unrestrained foreplay has her begging for more, take your lovemaking to a new level.
Don’t wait until you both go to bed to get things going like you normally would. Instead,
sweep your lover up into your arms and whisk her off to bed. As you make love,
communicate your heart through your eyes and in the expressions of love and desire on
your face. Kiss your beloved with fiery passion. Run your hands along your lover’s
silhouette to communicate your adoration and grab their buttocks as a sign of affection.
As you intensify your lovemaking clasp your lover’s shoulders with strength and
tenderness or dig your fingernails into their back to reveal the depth of your emotion. The
key to being courageous during sex is to open your heart and give everything you’ve got.
Be fearless and don’t hold back during a sexual interlude. It will help you feel more
connected to each other, will increase your desire and will ultimately bring you more
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pleasure.
In addition to being emotionally courageous, your heart of the lover ritual encourages you
to show more bravery in your sexual encounters. Forget about your normal lovemaking
routine and those favorite positions you use all the time. Be bold and raise the bar on your
sexual experience. Challenge yourself to try an exciting position you never thought you
could do. Be willing to get more athletic as you make love so you build up a sexy,
glistening sweat.
Men, take on the role of a courageous knight for your heart of the lover ritual. Instead of
making love in a reclining position on the bed, get more physical. Pick her up off the bed
and carry her to a nearby doorway where you’ve installed a horizontal exercise bar that
can be used for pull-ups. Have her place both her hands on the bar so her body is
stretched out beautifully before you. Admire her gorgeous body with your eyes and
devour her again with your mouth and tongue. Kiss and lick your way from her hot
mouth, down her neck and abdomen to her genitals. Tease her with your tongue as she
Come back to your feet and let her wrap her legs around your waist as you face each
other. After you enter her, get really physical and place your hands on the bar as well and
hang from it so you feel your weight and hers pulling on you. The tension in your arms
will create a challenge that will get your hearts pumping and will intensify the physicality
of your union. In this athletic position, the man can come from underneath and angle his
penis upwards and shift his weight from the heels to the balls of his feet to create a
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dynamic thrusting motion. It also allows her to grind her pelvis and clitoris against you,
It probably won’t take long in this position for the sweat beads to appear on you both.
Lick the salty droplets off each other for a tasty treat, and when you can no longer
support yourself on the bar, let your feet come back to the floor. With her arms still on
the bar, let her continue to rub her pelvis against yours until she reaches a glorious
climax. Then you can grab onto her hips and pull her pelvis toward you in a more
rhythmic fashion to bring you to a sexy release. Holding tightly onto her waist, let her
remove her hands from the bar and carry her into the shower for a rinse off or more
Poetic Foreplay
History of Sex
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On their many epic journeys through Arabia, the chivalrous knights became infatuated
with poetic foreplay as a powerful new way to woo their beloved ladies. When they
returned to their homeland in Europe, they shared their newfound love for lyrical verses.
It didn’t take long for the lords and ladies of the court to become equally enamored with
the art of love poetry, which often featured a knight’s desire for an unattainable lover.
During the 12th and 13th centuries, the most popular of these romantic poems were put to
music and sung by troubadours who traveled from royal court to royal court throughout
medieval Europe. Classic examples of such delicious poetry include [ital]La Chanson de
Roland[ital], an epic about Charlemagne’s nephew, and the tale of Tristan and Iseult,
which emanated from the legends of King Arthur. These verses proved so inspiring to the
knights and ladies of the Middles Ages that they served as a sort of poetic foreplay, often
You can borrow from the medieval knights and troubadours to create your own form of
poetic foreplay. By using poetry in erotic and exciting ways in the bedroom, it can lead to
You don’t have to be a literature major to enjoy adding a little poetic foreplay to your sex
life. In fact, even if you’re one of those people who cringed at having to do a poetry
recital in school, you’ll fall in love with this erotic and steamy poetic foreplay. With this
ritual, you’ll discover that there’s a whole lot more you can do with poetry than just recite
it. And just as poetry brought great pleasure to medieval knights and ladies, it will open
up a whole new world of passion for you and your loved one to enjoy.
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Choose Poetry that Inspires You
For your poetic foreplay ritual, choose poetry that inspires you and your lover whether
it’s from a modern-day troubadour like Bob Dylan or a medieval bard. Need a suggestion
for an exquisite work of Arabian love poetry that may have inspired the knights of the
Middle Ages? Delve into The Love Poems of Rumi by Deepak Chopra. A Persian poet of
the 13th century, Rumi composed ravishing verses of longing that expressed the ultimate
in yearning, glorious ecstasy and all-consuming desire. Rumi’s breathtaking verses will
Of course, you can choose any love poetry that speaks to you no matter what era it’s
from. For example, classic love verses from Emily Dickinson, Shakespeare or Percy
Bysshe Shelley might inspire you. If you prefer a more contemporary type of poetry, feel
free to pop in a CD of love songs from your favorite musical artist. You’ll discover that
much of today’s music covers the same themes of unrequited love and desire as those
medieval poems that delighted the knights and ladies of that era. And just like the
troubadours of the Middle Ages would serenade the lovers in court, your musical artist
can be playing in the background while you and your lover make love.
Until death,
Peerless Lady.
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Foy Porter by Guillaume de Machaut
Give an erotic take to the poetry recital for your poetic foreplay ritual. The whole idea
here is to read poetry aloud and then let the words and the way you say them get you in
the mood for sex. Because you want your words to be the inspiration, try hands-off
foreplay for a change. You’ll be surprised how simple spoken words can heighten your
desire as much as all the touching and stroking usually involved in foreplay. To make
sure your lover can’t use their hands, tie their wrists lightly behind them using a silky
sash.
With music playing softly in the background, stand nude near your lover and start
reciting your love poem in a low, sultry voice. Speak each word with passion and let the
words resonate in the air. Inch your way closer to your lover but don’t touch them as you
keep reciting your poem. Now, bring your lips right up to their ear and barely whisper the
poem to them. Your hot breath on their ear and the vibrations of your voice will send
Move your mouth from their ear and continue reciting your poem sensuously as you
move your mouth over the most sensitive areas of their body, but don’t let your lips come
in contact with their skin. Then pull away from them and strut around them while you
deliver your enchanting poem. Then lean back in to whisper your love verses close to
their ear, into their hungry mouth and onto their quivering genitals—still without
touching. By now, you will both be aching to feel each other’s touch.
At this point, you can trade positions and intensify the poetic foreplay by lying nude on
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the bed and letting your lover tie your wrists lightly to the bedpost using a silky sash.
Have your lover sit nude on the edge of the bed near you as they thrill you with more
Poetry in Motion
When you’re ready to shift from poetic foreplay into lovemaking, think of the act as a
sort of poetry in motion. You may want to keep your lover tied to the bed while you tease
and excite them with your fluid movements. Keep reciting the delicious words of your
love poems to each other as you interpret those verses with your bodies. Intersperse
lingering kisses and light caresses with your poetry. Like a troubadour who travels from
one city to the next, let your mouth travel from one part of your lover’s body to another.
To intensify their desire, kiss them everywhere—nibble on their inner thighs, lick up each
side or your lover’s torso and recite your poem directly over their genitals so your hot
When you can’t wait any longer, take your poetic lovemaking to the next step. If she’s
tied to the bed, mount her and penetrate her deeply while her body writhes with yours.
Bring your hands up to meet hers as you make love. When you feel like you might
orgasm, pull out and revisit her genitals with your mouth, saying your love poem in
between delicious licks on her clitoris. Keep this erotic love poetry going until she
reaches exalted ecstasy then resume penetration until you reach an explosive orgasm.
If he’s the one whose wrists are tied to the bed, climb on top of him and straddle him,
keeping the soles of your feet on the bed. Lower yourself onto his penis and then lift
yourself up and down to create incredible sensations for you both. Bring your fingers up
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to his lips and let him suck on them and then shift them down so you can massage
yourself while you ride his penis. Don’t forget to keep saying the loving words from your
poem in a deep, throaty voice as you make love. Your poetry in motion will thrill you
Courting Love
History of Sex
The medieval Europeans’ near-obsession with love and romance developed into
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delightful court games, in which ladies set the rules of courtship, and suitors had to
submit to their whims. Courting love took on an even greater importance during the
Middle Ages thanks to two women, Eleanor of Aquitaine, who was the Queen of France
and England during the 12th century, and her daughter, Marie the Countess of
Champagne. It was Eleanor who strongly encouraged the ideal of courtly love and who
was believed to have created the “Courts of Love”. Historians disagree on what actually
occurred at these Courts of Love. Some say that suitors would seek the queen’s advice on
affairs of the heart while others claim that knights would pledge their cases to a tribunal
of women who would judge the merit of their case based on the rules of love.
Taking after her mother, Marie also had a keen interest in romance and supposedly
inspired a clerk named Andreas Capellanus to write a treatise called The Art of Courtly
Love that spelled out the rules of love. This work, which may have been satirical in
nature, portrayed women as the mistresses of the game of love. It was the fairer sex who
set the rules for courtship, ensuring that their knights treated women right in the romance
department.
It sounds like the women of the Middle Ages acted in ways that modern-day women
might want to emulate. By setting the ground rules for love, you give your lover a clear
picture of how you want to be treated. And by asking for what you want in the bedroom,
you guarantee that you’ll get the steamy sex that you desire.
Inject a much-appreciated shot of romance into your sex life by borrowing from the
notion of courting love. Like the fair ladies of the Middle Ages who set the rules for
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courtship, women get to be in charge of every aspect of the modern-day version of this
practice. That’s why this enchanting love ritual usually ends up being a favorite for
women. Men typically love it, too, because it means they don’t have to try to guess what
you want from them, which is a common complaint from men. You spell out every
steamy, sensual detail, and your lover eagerly follows your gentle commands. There’s no
doubt that you’ll be happy with your romantic evening, and if you’re happy, he will be,
too.
Explain the rules of your courting love ritual to your lover. Give him explicit instructions
about what he must do to make the evening the most romantic as possible for you. You
may want to write up a list of your “Rules for Courting Love” and tuck it into his pants
pocket or slip it into his briefcase. When he finds your sensual “honey-do” list, he will be
On your list, include things like what you want him to wear and what music you want
playing in the background. If you want rose petals strewn about your love den, write it
down. If a roaring fire in the fireplace gets you in the mood, put it on your list.
Champagne, chocolates, silky pillows or a fur rug—whatever your definition of the word
romantic is, include it on your list. Take your to-do list even further by giving him
directions about the steamy activities you want him to perform and how you want him to
do them. Do you want a sensual back massage or a neck rub? Are you dying for him to
kiss you in certain places or up and down the entire length of your body? Would you like
neverending oral sex? Get really explicit so your lover knows exactly what he needs to do
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to make the evening as pleasurable as possible for you.
Here are a few enticing ideas for sensual activities you may want to ask for in your
courting love ritual. Have your lover greet you at the door with a soulful kiss and then
usher you into the beautiful setting you designed. The fact that he’s followed your
instructions to a “T” and transformed your home into an alluring lover’s lair will surely
ignite your desire. Let him disrobe you so the curves of your body glisten in the light
from the fireplace. Make him kneel down to remove your shoes and rub your feet gently.
On his knees in front of your nude body, invite him to worship you with oral sex. As his
tongue searches out your clitoris, give him loving instructions about how you want him to
pleasure you. Tell him if you want the contact to be lighter, harder, faster or slower.
Describe in delicious details how you want his tongue to tease your clitoris—circle
around it, flick it up and down or provide constant contact. If you like gentle sucking,
give him a verbal cue to let him know. Keep offering tender guidance until he brings you
to an ecstatic crescendo.
Next, have him lay you down on a bed of soft pillows and let him continue to worship
your body by caressing it lightly with the softest touch. Instruct him to shift the pillows
so they are positioned under your torso so your back arches up and your head leans back
down toward the ground. Command that he enter you, gently at first and then with more
power. As he arches up into you, enjoy the incredible sensation of his burning desire for
you. To take control again, have him shift back so he’s lying on some pillows and you’re
straddling him. Ride his penis, controlling the tempo so you decide when it’s time for
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him to reach orgasm.
After you’ve made love, have your knight fetch you some champagne or chocolates and
then order him to please you again sexually. You’ll find that the irresistible courting love
ritual provides a perfect opportunity for you to let your lover know exactly what you like
best sexually. The playful commands you give him now can pay off with a sublime
orgasm not only on this occasion, but also for years to come.
When Janet heard about the Courting Love ritual, she thought it would be perfect for an
upcoming vacation to Europe. Janet explained to her husband Robert that she would set
the rules of the game and that he would prove his love for her by making it happen. She
told Robert that she had always fantasized about making love in a European castle and
being treated like a queen. Robert was turned on by this idea and was up for the
challenge.
he had found the perfect place, he asked the hotel’s concierge to help him find royal-
looking robes. They enlisted a tailor in the area to make robes to Robert’s and Janet’s
exact dimensions with a design based on a picture that Janet had pointed out to Robert a
few months back. He even found a beautiful crown for Janet to wear. Robert did not utter
The evening they arrived at the castle was a complete surprise to Janet. As she entered,
each of the staff bowed to her as if she were royalty and then led her and Robert to their
room. Janet could not believe what was before her. Torches on the wall and a roaring fire
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illuminated the room with a sensual golden glow. The ideal medieval music was playing
in the background, the room was filled with the fragrance of jasmine and a high four-
poster bed took center stage. Robert walked Janet to the middle of the room and
undressed her slowly. He then wrapped her in her robe and placed the dainty crown upon
her head and got down on one knee and said, “My queen, I am at your service.” They
Adventurous Sex
History of Sex
The knights of the Middles Ages were the adventurers of the day, journeying to far-off
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lands to fight infidels. Their compelling and heroic exploits were depicted in a number of
books, such as [ital]Beowulf[ital], that became wildly popular with readers who couldn’t
get enough of these fascinating tales. In most of these sagas, the heroes faced great odds
that tested their bravery and courage. These exciting tales also featured high adventure,
damsels in distress and evil foes. It doesn’t sound much different from any modern movie
you might see, does it? The idealized heroes in these tales engaged in exciting feats not
only in war but also in love. Their passion for exploration translated into a desire for
Adapting the excitement of the medieval times for your own bedroom rituals is
guaranteed to spice up your love life. With a little creativity, you can recreate your own
Translate the pages of those epic medieval books about courageous knights and their
daring exploits into ideas for adventurous sex. Just the way the heroes in those sagas were
forced to triumph over great odds, you can create obstacles that your lover has to
overcome in order to win you and your sexual favors. Women, think of your version of
these medieval tales as a sort of cat-and-mouse chase in which your lover has to work
very hard to secure his prize: you. The added challenges intensify desire and will make
For your adventurous sex ritual, set up a few “roadblocks” that your lover will have to
overcome. For example, wear clothing that doesn’t slip off easily. Instead, try wearing a
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tight corset with rows of tiny buttons that your lover will have to undo one by one. As he
successfully unhooks each button, reward him with a deep kiss and some erotic touching.
After he manages to undo all of the buttons, let him remove your corset to reveal your
bare breasts and then take off his shirt. Wearing a skirt that wraps around and around
your sexy hips and is tied with a sash will also slow him down. Again, when he finally
figures out how to take off your garments, offer up a prize by letting him caress your bare
breasts and hips, but only briefly. Also, let him strip down now so you’re both completely
nude.
If you’re in the bedroom, move so you’re standing beside the bed and have him get down
on all fours in the middle of the bed. Force him to stay on all fours on the bed as he tries
to lunge for you in order to touch you while you play “keepaway” from him. You can run
from side to side or around the bed to avoid his touch. Once he gets you in his grasp, he
wins, and you grant him yet another sexual favor. This time, you might want to let him
Take your epic sexual journey into another room now. Make your lover wait on the bed
with his eyes closed for sixty seconds while you hide somewhere else in the house. When
he opens his eyes, he has to come searching for you like a knight on a quest. If he finds
you, he wins an erotic hand massage to stimulate his penis. With one hand circle his shaft
firmly so your thumb is on the underside of his penis. Stroke your hand up and down
rhythmically while adding extra pressure with your thumb to the sensitive underside. Do
this just long enough to excite him, then move on to your next erotic obstacle.
Make him wait again while you head back to the bedroom and slide under the sheets,
wrapping them around and around your curvaceous body. Then invite him to come and
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get you. He will have to unwrap the tangled sheets to earn another sexy reward. When he
does, let him press his nude body next to yours so your genitals touch. Rub your hips
provocatively against his. You’ll feel his penis harden even more as the rubbing ignites
desire in your genitals. You’ll both be panting with passionate longing by now, but don’t
give in to your desires. It’s time to take your adventurous sex ritual to even greater
heights.
Tear yourself away from the arms of your lover once again and if possible, let him follow
you outdoors where you have another fun obstacle set up, such as a swing. Take your
place in the swing and start swinging higher and higher. The sensation of swinging
through the fresh air will awaken every nerve ending in your nude body. Your lover will
have to attempt to slow you down as you swing and bring you to a stop. When he
With him standing before you, hold on to the handles of the swing and lift your pelvis
toward him so he can enter you. After so many obstacles and so much sexual teasing, this
union will feel incredibly thrilling to you both. Let him initiate a very gentle swinging
motion at this point by using the swing’s handles to push you away and then pull you
towards him. As he swings you back and forth, your epic adventurous sex ritual will
When I spoke to Frank and Lillian, they wanted help putting spice back into their sex life.
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We started to discuss Adventurous Sex and how that might be appealing to them. Frank
was a former Navy Seal, and adventure seemed to be just what was needed. In fact, that
sense of adventure is what drew them together in the first place as Lillian was a cross-
country runner. We discussed some ways they might implement this sexual practice, and
They came up with the idea of doing an athletic version of hide and seek on the secluded
property behind their house. That weekend, they gave it a whirl. The idea was that Lillian
would have two minutes to hide on the property, and Frank would have to go on a quest
to find her. Lillian decided to run up over a hill and hide behind some trees on the other
side. When Frank found her, he got to take her sexually any way he wanted. The physical
exertion got their sexual juices flowing, and he decided to take her against the tree
standing up. After they had sex for a few minutes, it was Frank’s turn to hide. He ran
behind a haystack, and Lillian had great fun searching for him and then taking a roll in
The whole idea behind their adventurous sex escapade was that they wanted to hide from
each other, but they also wanted to be found. They gave each other hints like a finger
making a come hither-motion from behind the tree or the hay flying up in the air. Their
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Chapter Seven
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Intro
Thousands of years ago, men and women from certain indigenous cultures throughout the
Americas believed that sexuality was a gateway to deepening their spirituality and their
connection with nature. Teaching the tribal people how to recognize and utilize the power
of their sexuality were shaman, sometimes called medicine men and women, who acted
as mediums between the earthly world and the spirit world. This shamanic sexual
tradition arose among the Toltec and Olmec tribes in Meso-America, a region extending
approximately from central Mexico to Nicaragua. From there, it spread across the sun-
When invaders penetrated their land, these shaman were forced to take their sacred sexual
teachings underground to prevent hostile outsiders from misusing them. In 1254 BC,
native shaman throughout the Americas held a secret meeting in the Yucatan at the
Rattlesnake School of Turtle Island. Turtle Island was the native name given to the
ancient land mass that once comprised all of North America, South America, Australia
and New Zealand. Many shamanic sex practices and customs thought to be discussed at
this historic gathering, including their belief that a powerful sexual energy within the
body enhanced their relationship with all of creation, are still being practiced today under
Playing a central role in this shamanic tradition was the medicine wheel, which dates
back more than 4,500 years. The medicine wheel, a mystical tribal symbol, represented
the eternal cycle of life. Across the Americas, a medicine wheel consisted of a central
circle with rays of rocks that radiated out to a larger outer circle of rocks. The large-scale
structures resembled a bicycle wheel, with each section representing a cardinal direction
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(North, East, South or West), a natural element (wind, fire, water or earth) and an
important aspect of life (the mind, the spirit, the heart or the body). The circle at the
center of the medicine wheel symbolized sexuality and the essence of creation.
Ancient tribal people celebrated the medicine of sexuality by engaging in magical sex
ceremonies, such as the “sacred body awakening process”. This sensual rite involved 24
unseen fiber filaments located in the navel area that were believed to link an individual to
their partner and to the spiritual world. Some of these threadlike filaments could produce
a negative effect on a sexual union while others could help members of the tribe achieve
their sexual potential. With concentration, a person could “tie off” the unseen negative
filaments, allowing them to engage in optimal carnal relations that could enhance
A transcendent connection with the spirit world was one of the loftiest goals for lovers,
but earthly pleasures were also important. According to this shamanic tradition, couples
needed to be sexually compatible in order to experience the greatest joys of carnal sex.
to this wisdom, there are nine types of the male penis—called tipili—and female vagina
—called tupuli. The type of genitalia a person possessed indicated which sexual activities
Using the knowledge of the medicine wheel and their sexual anatomy, indigenous people
could achieve orgasms that went way beyond the genitals. Ordinary orgasms transformed
into all-over body experiences that could last for an hour or more. Even greater than the
physical pleasure they provided, these higher levels of ecstasy allowed individuals to
connect to the “as above” and the “so below”. The as above referred to levels of
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consciousness including the conscious mind, the subconscious mind, the unconscious, the
collective conscious and the Great Spirit’s conscious. The so below symbolized the
natural elements of earth, water, wind and fire and all of nature. As above and so below
ceremonies might be performed as fertility rites to bring better crops or to bless a union
between a man and a woman, but they also led to indescribable orgasmic pleasure.
If you want to add a little sexual magic to your own love life, experiment with the sexual
ceremonies and practices of this shamanic tradition. Try tapping into a primal shamanic
sexual experience by honoring sexuality at the center of your medicine wheel and
inviting the cardinal directions and natural elements into your lovemaking. Take a
practical hint from indigenous cultures that understood the importance of sexual
compatibility and get to know your own sexual anatomy and your partner’s so you both
understand what turns you on physically. Reenact an as above and so below ceremony to
lead you into more intense levels of intimate connection and orgasm.
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The Medicine Wheel and Sexuality
History of Sex
For more than 4,500 years, the medicine wheel has been one of the most powerful
symbols of life and sexuality. These wheels have appeared in many forms, but the most
basic of them featured a large circle surrounding a smaller inner circle with four spokes
linking one to the other. Believed to represent the cycle of life, death and renewal,
medicine wheels were used to explain the creation of the universe and the creation of life.
Creation and sexuality’s role in procreation were symbolized by that circle at the center
Sexuality’s position at the heart of the wheel revealed its supreme importance in the cycle
pleasure, produce a stronger life force and deepen the connection to the spirit world.
To comprehend these practices, you must first understand that indigenous people
believed that all humans possessed not only an umbilical cord to the mother but also a
spiritual cord to the spirit world. This invisible cord consisted of 24 fiber filaments
located in the navel area, which have a variety of protrusions at the ends, including
Whenever two people engaged in sex, their physical bodies connected, and their
filaments also intertwined with their lover’s. The type of protrusions that were involved
fulfilling or destined for failure. The protrusions activated in the intimate experience were
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Connections involving hooks, suckers and arrows contaminated a relationship. Hooks,
Suckers, like suction cups, could sap energy from the other person, and arrows with their
piercing angles symbolized animosity. On the flip side, probes could be seen as gentle
objects that gave a person the ability to delve deeper into their lover’s body and soul,
allowing two lovers to become one with each other. Feelers, like sensors, were seen as
the tactile keys to sexual excitation. When probes and feelers were the only filaments
actively involved, lovers could achieve their full sexual potential together.
The sacred body awakening process was a ceremony that supported lovers to “tie off”
those hooks and arrows so they could enter a sexual union using only their probes and
feelers. In this ritual, couples would face each other either clothed or nude and would
touch each other as they imagined wrapping the filaments around their own bodies and
tying them in a knot the same way you would tie a belt on a martial arts uniform. In this
way, lovers could use the intimacy-inducing probes and feelers during intercourse to
You can tap into a primal shamanic sexual experience by honoring the ancient medicine
wheel with your own version of the sacred body awakening process. A modern
interpretation of this ceremony can lead to greater sensuality and a more positive,
intimate connection with your lover, both of which promise heightened sexual pleasure.
Another way to celebrate the medicine wheel through your lovemaking is to invite the
cardinal directions and natural elements into your romantic interlude. In addition to
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feeling a stronger bond with nature, it will also delight your body with amazing
sensations.
The drum is the musical instrument most commonly used during indigenous ceremonies
and rituals, and its rhythmic beating can set the tone for a pulsating sexual ritual. Get into
the mood for your mystical and magical medicine wheel adventure with music that
features shamanic drumming. Possible choices include James Asher’s Shaman Drums
To begin honoring the medicine wheel with a modern-day version of sacred body
awakening, face your lover in the nude and imagine those fiber filaments located in your
navel area. To help you envision those fibers, you may want to have some long, silk
sashes in two different colors, such as black for the hooks, suckers and arrows and purple
for the probes and feelers. Take one of the long black silk sashes and tie it around your
In the shamanic tradition, after the disharmonious fibers had been tied off, the uplifting
probe and feeler fibers could be sent out to a lover’s body to create an electromagnetic
charge that would give them goosebumps, make the woman wet or give the man an
erection. Emulate the concept of sending your harmonious fibers out to your lover by
intertwining your purple sashes and looping them around different areas of your bodies.
As you unite with each other utilizing your intimacy-enhancing fibers or purple sashes,
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touch each other’s nude bodies with long, sensual caresses. Stroke each other to arouse
your bodies and intensify your connection to each other. Men, pull her close to you with
one hand behind her waist and use your other hand to gently touch her face and neck.
Simultaneously, women, bring your hands to his back and run them from his shoulders
Another way you can send out your probes and feelers to your lover’s body is to hold one
of the ends of the purple sashes in your hand to give your lover a silky, sensual touch.
The cool feeling of the smooth material will excite your lover even more. With the sash
in your hand, rub your way down to their genitals, letting the sash tickle their tipili or
tupuli. Grasping his tipili with a purple sash-covered hand and stroking it will surely get
him fully aroused. And gliding the silken sash over her tupuli will get her sexual juices
Now that your body awakening ceremony has sparked you and your lover with desire,
honor the medicine wheel with potent lovemaking that calls on the power of the four
cardinal directions - South, North, West and East - with the natural elements of water,
wind, earth and fire. Place a compass in the center of your living room to determine your
four directions. If you don’t have a compass, you can find the East by noting the side of
the house where the sun rises and the West by where the sun sets. Then set your course to
make love in each of the four directions of your home and invite the elements into the
fun, too.
Starting in the South direction of your home, begin your medicine wheel ritual with
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refreshing lovemaking and the corresponding element of water. You may desire to make
love in the shower or take a spray mister and mist each other all over your bodies before
making love in the South. Feel the wet and warm sensations exciting you both.
Once you feel rejuvenated, feel free to move your lovemaking to the North direction.
Choose an area or room in the North where you can open a window or turn on a ceiling
fan so the breeze kisses your naked skin. In many ways, the element of wind caressing
your body can be just as erotic and enticing as your lover’s touch. You can also create
your own sexy wind by blowing softly on each other’s erogenous zones. For example,
you can lick your lover’s nipples then blow on them to make them harden and tingle with
pleasure.
Women, you can use this strategy to introduce your lover to an exciting new kind of
“blow job”. Travel down to his tipili and run your tongue along its sensitive underside
then pucker up and treat it to a waft of your warm breath. Do the same by circling the
head with your tongue then blowing. Continue alternating between luscious licks all over
his tipili and blowing until he’s fully erect. Now it’s your turn to receive his offerings of
love. Men, you can use the same technique to tease her tupuli, directing air onto her
clitoris and labia. This delectable move will have you both ready for more of this
lovemaking ritual.
Now move to the West part of your home. If you have a private area in the West outdoors
in your backyard, this would be ideal to get your bodies in tune with the natural wonders
of the corresponding element of earth. Have her lean against a tree or large stone as you
melt your body into hers. Take the ends of the sash in your hands and cradle her face in
your hands as your mouth sinks into hers for a deep soul kiss. Nibble her lips gently then
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turn your kisses to her soft neck.
Enjoy the feeling of the grass beneath your bare feet as you bury your face in her breasts.
Cup her breasts in both of your hands and press them together to create alluring cleavage
as you lick and tease her nipples. Circle her nipples with your tongue and then take them
between your lips and suck them into your mouth. Very gently bite down on them as you
suck, paying attention to her reactions in case this sensation is too intense for her. This
type of erotic nipple play can leave her begging for more.
Women, as he worships at your altar, cover your hands with the silky sashes and let them
roam over his chest, rubbing your palms against his nipples. If he enjoys having his
nipples touched, take them between your thumb and forefinger and knead them. Try
giving them a tender tug to see if this heightens his arousal. Then wrap your sash around
the back of his neck and pull his body even closer to you.
Shift your lovemaking encounter to the East indoors now. Move to the East near a
fireplace (if you don’t have a fireplace, you can light candles to symbolize fire) and lie on
a soft rug to heat your bodies as you make very physical, passionate love. Men, sit on the
floor with your legs straight out in front of you then lean back and place your hands and
elbows on the floor behind you. Push your body upward so you’re balancing on your
forearms and heels. Women, position your body over his and guide his stiff tipili into
your wet tupuli, then place your hands on the ground to the sides of his torso in a push-up
position and spread your legs wide so your feet are resting on the floor to the sides of his
feet. Using the strength of your arms to hold you up, undulate your hips provocatively
while he pushes his pelvis up to meet yours. This very athletic position activates your
physicality and will ignite the pleasure in your genitals. The warmth from the fire and the
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heat from your vigorous intercourse will have you both glistening with sweat.
If you can’t maintain this position for long, let him lie back onto the rug while you sink
your body against the length of his. Keep grinding your pelvis against his to stimulate
your clitoris as he thrusts up into your tupuli. Don’t stop until you’ve both reached an
intense orgasm.
After you’ve completed your medicine wheel ritual, you can start the process all over
again. The same way the medicine wheel represents an eternal circle of life, your
When Kala and JC discovered the medicine wheel and the significance of sexuality at its
center, they took it to heart. Sex had become a peripheral experience in their relationship,
and they wanted to make it a central focus again. They decided to make a medicine wheel
of their own, placing sex at the center and then placing the four cardinal directions around
it—West, South, North and East representing the physical, emotional, mental and
Kala and JC decided to go around the wheel each week having a different kind of sex
each day—very physical sex, deeply emotional sex, mental sex or more spiritual sex. On
the day they would have mental sex, they might play a game of Scrabble, teasing each
other with sexy words for foreplay before lovemaking. For a day of spiritual sex, they
would practice having sex in the four directions to strengthen their connection with each
other and nature. Thanks to this approach, sex became a priority and was fresh and
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Sexual Compatibility
161
History of Sex
The Americas’ shamanic teachings reveal that sexual compatibility is based in part on
genital anatomy and plays a vital role in a couple’s ability to achieve the greatest heights
of ecstasy. Although every man and woman is unique, and no two are exactly the same,
the genital anatomy types are classified by common characteristics and placed in the
directions of the medicine wheel. There are different types of male tipili (penises) based
on length, circumference, the amount of ejaculate produced and more. Similarly, ancient
teachings indicate unique types of tupuli (vaginas), which were based on the depth of the
The various types of tipili and tupuli were given animal names and categorized as
follows. In the East were deer men and deer women, while the West boasted bear men
and buffalo women. Coyote men and sheep women took their place in the South while
horse men and wolf women took a position in the North. In the center, you could find
dancing men and dancing women, which accounted for about 65 percent of the
population.
As an example of the various types of sexual anatomy, a deer woman would be described
as having tiny inner vaginal lips (called the moth) and equally small outer lips (called the
butterfly). The distance from her vaginal opening to her clitoris would be short with her
G-spot close to the opening. Because of her physical anatomy, her natural proclivity
would be to gain the most sexual pleasure from fast and furious intercourse. A dancing
woman, on the other hand, has a longer distance from the vaginal opening to the clitoris
and a G-spot located deeper within the vaginal canal, which could make it a creative
challenge to find intercourse positions that satisfy her. Based on her physical attributes,
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she could achieve greater enjoyment from oral sex or intercourse that’s combined with
manual stimulation using your fingers. As for the men, a horse man would have a long,
thick penis that could please a woman who had a deep vaginal canal but that might be too
large for a woman with a shorter one. The dancing man represented an average size penis
Knowledge of genital anatomy types can aid a couple in discovering the ways to best
please each other. By exploring your own unique anatomy, you can gain a better
understanding of why your body responds to different sexual techniques and positions
more than others. And by taking the time to learn about your lover’s physical anatomy,
you’ll obtain insight into what turns them on sexually. Creating your own educational
show-and-tell session in which you both demonstrate and describe what pleases you most
can provide the carnal knowledge you need to bring each other to new heights of ecstasy.
Spend some time alone getting acquainted with your genitals. Make sure you have total
privacy before you undertake this self-exploration then take off your panties, grab a
mirror and spread your legs wide. For women, notice both sets of vaginal lips: the labia
majora, which are the outer lips naturally covered with pubic hair, and the labia minora
(not all women have this set), the hairless inner lips that resemble a blossoming flower.
These inner lips vary widely in color, size and length. Yours may be pink, red, brown,
purple or nearly black, and they may be thin or thick, long or short.
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Next, turn your attention to your clitoris, which is located where the labia meet to create a
small fold of skin called the clitoral hood. Note how far it is from your vaginal opening—
is it three inches away or only an inch or two? The closer it is to your vaginal opening,
the more likely it will be stimulated during intercourse, possibly giving you the ability to
achieve a clitoral orgasm through penetration alone. With a greater distance separating
your clitoris and vaginal opening, there’s less of a possibility of your clitoris receiving
that kind of stimulation from penile thrusting. Because of this, you may require oral or
The location of your G-spot can also determine how you respond to intercourse. To find
yours, insert your middle finger into your vagina and feel for a rough patch of tissue
against the front wall using a come-hither finger position. Named after the German
gynecologist Ernst Grafenberg, the G-spot swells when stimulated and can produce
orgasms in many women. If your G-spot is located close to the edge of your vaginal
opening, it is more likely to be stimulated during intercourse. If it lies deeper within the
Once you become familiar with your anatomy, start experimenting with self-pleasuring to
learn how your body responds to different types of touch—fast or slow, deep pressure or
light and fluttery touches. All women are different in this regard, and you may respond
only to direct clitoral stimulation, or you may find this too intense. You might also
discover that massaging your G-spot while you touch your clitoris will lead to an even
For men, it’s just as important to get up close and personal with your anatomy. It’s a lot
easier for you to understand the uniqueness of your tipili because you can see it without
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having to use a mirror. Lock yourself in your bathroom or bedroom and drop your
drawers for this intimate encounter with your private parts. One of the first things men
usually note about their tipili is its size. Tipilis vary in length, and the average tipili
measures about five to six inches when fully erect. Take a look at the diameter as well,
Get to know the various parts of your penis. You may already know that the head of your
tipili is considered the most sensitive part, but other areas may also provide tingling good
feelings. The corona is the ridge of skin that separates the shaft from the head, and you
may find it incredibly sexy when a woman runs her tongue or fingers around it. Just
below the corona on the underside of the tipili is the frenulum, also called the frenum,
which is a highly sensitive spot in some men. If you aren’t circumcised, you may also
derive great arousal from attention to the foreskin, which is packed full of nerve endings.
During your self-exploration, don’t forget about the family jewels. The scrotum is the sac
that contains your testicles, and this area can be a source of exquisite pleasure or intense
pain. It’s important for you to know if your scrotum is too sensitive for sexual play. Pay
particular attention to the raphe, the visible line that runs down the center of the scrotum.
You may find touching or licking this sensitive spot to be irresistible. After a good once-
over, begin to self-pleasure to determine your most sensitive areas and to discover how
Plan a sexy evening of show and tell so you and your lover can demonstrate and describe
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all the wonderful things you’ve discovered about your sexual anatomy. Start by slipping
out of your undies and sitting facing each other on the bed. You may want to use a
flashlight and take turns talking about the uniqueness of your genitals. For example, “see
how my clitoris is really close to the vaginal opening—that makes intercourse even better
for me” or “see this spot called the frenulum—it’s really sensitive to touch.” It may sound
like it could be a bit silly or even embarrassing to talk about your private parts, but you’ll
Intensify the excitement by showing each other how you like to be touched. Women, lean
back and start to massage your tupuli while your lover watches. Use this time to tell him
what you’re doing that you like so much. For example, if you like a slow, sensual touch
directly on the clitoris that builds to a faster motion, show him and tell him. If your
clitoris is too sensitive to handle direct contact, reveal how to excite you by massaging
As you show him what turns you on most, let him take over by mimicking your actions
using his own fingers or even his tongue. Keep giving him gentle directions to let him
know if you’d like it faster or slower or if you prefer continuous contact or quick flicks.
With your expert guidance, he’ll surely bring you to a deliciously strong orgasm.
Men, it’s your turn now. With your attentive lover gazing at you, demonstrate the way
you like your penis stroked and tell her what you’re doing so she can recreate the motion
herself. Do you like a firm grip or light strokes? Do you want more attention paid to the
head and corona, or would you love it if she maneuvered her hand down to your scrotum?
Give her the visual and verbal cues then let her get in on the act. Either let her bring you
to climax with a hand job, or have her add her tongue and mouth for a more thrilling
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experience. Again, give her encouraging directions to help her understand what gives you
When you’re both ready for lovemaking, shift your show-and-tell experiment to
intercourse. Continue to share what you’ve learned about your sexuality to make this
interlude as steamy as possible. For example, if she tells you that she likes it fast and
furious, give it to her that way. If she says she needs manual stimulation in addition to
intercourse, be sure to apply pelvic or penile pressure to her clitoris or stroke it with your
thumb or fingers while you thrust. Similarly, if you like your scrotum caressed while you
penetrate her, let her know it. The more you know about each other’s sexuality and
genitalia, the better you can satisfy each other, and that’s the real key to sexual
compatibility.
“Knowing about your own sexual anatomy can make you feel beautiful and unique
and gives a starting point for your sexuality.” Harley Swiftdeer, Shaman Elder of The
Deer Tribe
History of Sex
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Indigenous sex ceremonies were designed to connect to the “as above” and “so below”.
In tribal parlance, the as above referred to high levels of consciousness, which were
(subconscious mind), West (unconscious), East (collective conscious) and the center
(great spirit’s conscious). The so below symbolized the natural elements of earth, water,
wind and fire, and all of nature, which could also be found on the medicine wheel.
One such ceremony known as “creating the atmosphere of cohesion” involved two lovers
sitting before each other with a talking stick. A talking stick is an object that indigenous
tribes have utilized for centuries to encourage respectful dialogue by designating who had
the right to speak. While one partner held the talking stick, he or she could speak from
the heart while the other listened. The couple passed the talking stick back and forth to
each other as they engaged in a heart-to-heart discussion. After that, the pair might give
each other a sensual massage or drink an intoxicating ritual beverage, such as honey
In this ceremony, couples also evoked the power of the natural elements and consciously
called upon the Great Spirit in order to create transformative sexual magic. That meant
consciously feeling oneself in harmony with the elements during lovemaking to unify the
as above and so below. When performed properly, this could produce powerful, long-
lasting sex and energizing and rejuvenating orgasms that spread throughout the body
rather than providing only fleeting pleasure in the genitals. At the highest levels of
ceremonial sexuality, orgasms allowed lovers to be transported into a past life or even
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As Above and So Below Ceremony—Make It Your Own
Anyone can connect with the as above and so below while making love. All it takes is for
you and your lover to connect with each other and to nature. You may even be inspired to
invite the Great Spirit of consciousness to join in your ritual. Doing so can lead to
shamanic, multi-dimensional sex and orgasmic pleasure that go far beyond the genitals.
To connect on a deep and soulful level with your lover, perform your own version of the
“creating the atmosphere of cohesion” ceremony. Consider wearing organic cotton robes
for this intimate rite since they’re easy to take off. Before you begin, craft a talking stick
for your ritual. Your talking stick can be as simple or as elaborate as you wish. A small
branch from a tree in your own backyard will work just fine, or you can use beads,
feathers, shells or drawings to embellish your stick. Choose which one of you will speak
Place a large meditation cushion designed for two people (you can purchase these from
many online yoga accessory retailers) on the floor so you can both sit on it facing each
other. The added height of the cushion will create a sort of pedestal that elevates you and
Once seated, take a moment to close your eyes and invite the Great Spirit of
consciousness to support your lovemaking with a prayer, such as, “Great Spirit, fill us
with love in our hearts and bodies as we join in this intimate ceremony.” Then take the
talking stick into your hands and talk to your lover about what makes you feel sexual
attraction and love for them —“I am so turned on by the way you embrace me” or “Your
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beautiful smile drives me wild”—and what sexual activities you have in store for them
—“I can’t wait to give every ounce of my mind and body to you while making love” or
“I’m going to enjoy pleasing you in the way you have shown and taught me how”.
Pass the talking stick to your lover now and let them divulge all the wonderfully erotic
ways they appreciate you and what they have planned for your pleasure. This sexy tete-a-
tete will surely leave you both yearning with desire. Follow up your lusty, heartfelt talk
with a sensual massage or share a drink of your favorite ritual beverage, whether that’s
When you’re both ready for intercourse, shed your clothing and flow like water as you
have him lean back on one corner of the meditative cushion with his hands on the cushion
behind him and his knees bent with his feet flat on the floor. Straddle him and insert his
erect tipili into your wet tupuli and lean back so your hands rest on the floor behind you
and your feet are on the cushion. Have him remain still while you tilt your pelvis up and
down slowly in waves, letting your sexual juices envelop his tipili. Try contracting the
muscles within your tupuli to tighten them around his tipili to add to his pleasure and
yours.
As you make love, tap into the shamanic sexual practice of synchronized breathing. Deep
abdominal inhaling and exhaling in unison with your lover can lighten your physical
energy, intensify your orgasmic abilities, and make you feel as if your two bodies are
Keeping your breathing harmonious, let the so below element of wind move you into the
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next position. Sit up and push his chest down until his back arches off the opposite corner
of the cushion and his head reaches the floor. Feel a wild wind inspire you to press your
hands against his torso as you lift yourself up and down on his tipili.
This position puts you in control of the speed and depth of penetration and allows you to
use your fingers to arouse yourself if that’s what your sexual anatomy desires. For him,
watching your beautiful body moving up and down on his, as your hair blows in the
breeze, can be intoxicating. Another benefit of this position is that it allows you to fully
experience the notion of the as above and so below in that you can arch your back so your
eyes are looking up to connect with the as above while his head is touching the earth so
below.
Feel the fire now as you roll over so your knees are on the cushion and your palms are
resting on the ground so he can enter you from behind. Let this fiery hot position ignite
your passion for each other as he plunges deep into your tupuli. Men, you may want to
add some sexy tribal drumming to your lovemaking ritual by gently tapping rhythmically
with your open palms on her luscious buttocks while you penetrate her from behind. Like
many women, she may find this light drumming to be extremely erotic and exciting.
Finally, tumble off the edge of the cushion so she’s lying on her back on the earth while
When you start to feel an orgasm building in your genitals, you are ready to experience
one of the five levels of orgasm. If you’re new to the art of indigenous ceremonial sex,
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you will probably achieve a level one or level two climax that’s localized in your genital
area. According to ancient teachings, these orgasms offer arousing ecstatic sensations
throughout the genitals. The level one or two orgasm is highly pleasurable and healing.
As you become more adept, you can call on the as above directions on the medicine
wheel to expand your lovemaking. For instance, as you make love, tune in to the South
direction and call forth its support in bringing your conscious mind into the orgasmic act.
Use your conscious mind to mobilize the energy you’re feeling in your genitals
throughout your body. With practice, you may begin to experience the higher shamanic
levels of orgasm.
When you progress beyond level two, you may begin to feel your orgasms in areas of
your body other than your genitals. For example, you may unexpectedly experience an
orgasm where the pleasure sensations ripple through your throat and you find yourself
involuntarily expressing sounds of rapture. These orgasms also last longer and build
energy rather than leaving you feeling spent or exhausted. At a level three orgasm, you’ll
notice a nice, smooth initial charge rather than a quick jolt, and the electrically sweet
orgasmic sensations will linger throughout your body. When you reach this level, you can
At even higher levels, you can experience transcendent sexual magic. For example, in a
level four shamanic orgasm, you can no longer tell where your body ends and your
lover’s begins. This highly intense, long-lasting climax also allows you to journey
beyond the here and now. Level four is associated with astral projection, in which you
can look deep into your lover’s eyes and see their face transform into one from a past life.
The ultimate orgasm is a level five, which can be sustained for many hours. This greatly
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desired yet elusive master level crescendo can take decades of practice to attain and leads
to ethereal projection, which may allow you to see into the future. Although you may
never reach this highly mystical level five orgasm, you can definitely have a lot of fun
trying. And who knows, you just might be able to achieve an incredible orgasmic
Willa and Zak loved to take mystical adventures, and the as above and so below sounded
like the ultimate sexual mystical adventure to them. The premise of connecting with
nature and calling on the Great Spirit to accompany them through their sexual journey
It was a warm and starry night so they went up to their rooftop patio where they had
layers of blankets awaiting them. They each stripped down and turned on some tribal
drumming music. Then they sat in front of each other with their eyes closed and called on
the Great Spirit from above to join them in making their sexual interlude a rich and
rewarding experience. While holding hands, they turned their chins upward and looked
out into the jeweled black sky as a way to connect with the as above.
They then each took turns merging with the so below elements. First Willa embodied
wind and let the wind move her in a dance of seduction for Zak. Then Zak had his turn
and merged with earth to nurture Willa with long soothing embraces and then with fire to
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Chapter Eight
174
Intro
The lucky people in the Nordic (also called Scandinavian) countries of Norway, Sweden,
Denmark, Finland and Iceland, view sexuality more liberally than in any other region in
the world. The locals who live amid the Norwegian fjords, Danish lowlands, Finnish
forests, Swedish archipelagos and Icelandic glaciers, aren’t raised with repressive notions
about sex. In fact, a refreshing sense of sexual egalitarianism thrives in these frosty
winter wonderlands where premarital sex, nudity and sensual touching are completely
acceptable. Travel to Scandinavia today, and you’re likely to come across sex shops,
nude beaches and full-frontal nudity on television. While you may think that these
relaxed attitudes about sex are entirely modern, they are, in fact, deeply rooted in ancient
Many of the Scandinavian people’s open-minded sexual attitudes can be traced to an old
Nordic custom called Night Courtship, which was practiced in Denmark and other
regions of Scandinavia throughout the 17th and 18th centuries. In this erotic ritual, young
boys were permitted to visit unmarried girls and lie in bed with them. It is believed that
the teenage girls got to decide whether or not to allow the teenage boys to join them in
bed and also whether or not to invite them to return. This practice often led to hormone-
In addition to being open-minded about premarital sex, Scandinavians have a long history
of being comfortable with nudity. A movement called naturism, which encourages social
nudity along with a lifestyle that’s in harmony with nature, initiated in 18th century
Europe and has since flourished throughout Scandinavia. As a result, Scandinavians now
enjoy clothing-optional beaches, parties in the buff, nudist resorts, nudism in the wild and
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of course, being nude in the privacy of one’s home. As you might suspect, studies on
nudism show that it increases self-esteem, promotes a positive body image and makes
Scandinavians aren’t just adept at getting in touch with their nude bodies, they’re masters
at touching naked skin through the art of Swedish massage. Developed in the 19th
century, Swedish massage involves the use of five flowing strokes called effleurage
You may be surprised to discover that historians disagree about whether or not Swedish
massage was actually created by a Swede. While some give the credit to Swedish
physiologist Per Henrik Ling, others say it was a Dutch masseur named Johan Georg
Mezger who adopted the French names used to describe the five strokes of Swedish
become highly sought after as a curative method to relieve tension, minimize pain and
reduce stress. But that’s not all it’s good for. Swedish massage has also emerged as one
of the most popular and sensual forms of foreplay for lovers everywhere.
You and your lover can learn a lot from the sensual and sexual history of Scandinavia. By
adopting their open-minded sexual attitudes, you and your lover can free yourselves from
any inhibitions you may have so you can try exciting erotic experiences you’ve only
fantasized about. If you can embrace naturism like the Scandinavians, you can learn to
love your naked body, which is guaranteed to take your enjoyment of lovemaking to new
heights. And if you want to explore the delights of sensual touching during foreplay and
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Open-Minded Sexual Attitudes
History of Sex
The warm-hearted people of the Nordic countries have earned a worldwide reputation for
their open-minded sexual attitudes. In Scandinavia, women and men both feel free to
engage in consensual sexual activities without any of the feelings of guilt or shame that
many Americans associate with sex. And a high degree of erotic egalitarianism ensures
that women can enjoy their sexuality just as much as men without the fear of being
hundreds of years in the making and date back to Nordic customs that were commonly
Among these old Nordic customs was a rite known as Night Courtship. According to
legend, unmarried teenage girls would often sleep together in a barn loft during the
springtime. Young teenage boys from all over the region would come to visit and
serenade the young girls in the hope of winning an invitation to join the slumber party.
Based on their performance, the boys were either sent away or invited in for some
nighttime canoodling.
The lucky boys who got the greenlight to enter were allowed to sleep with the girls as
long as they kept their clothes on and slept on top of the covers. If a girl felt a romantic
connection with one of the boys, she could invite him back for another late-night date.
With each visit, their budding romance escalated. The girl might allow the boy to sleep
under the covers with her, making him keep his clothes on at first and then after some
time, letting him sleep in the nude. Eventually, she would permit him to make mad
passionate love to her right there in the barn loft. These steamy unions could result in
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pregnancy and marriage—often in that order. But just like premarital sex was no big deal,
having a child before marriage was also perfectly acceptable in those times.
Having open-minded sexual attitudes like the Scandinavians can do a world of good for
your own sex life. Like the Nordic lovers of old, you and your beloved can spice up your
sex life by shedding your inhibitions and engaging in some unrestrained, yet protected,
I will praise you from top to toe and in between, if I can get you, mirror and
honorable woman.
To enjoy open-minded sexual attitudes, all you need to do is rid yourself of any
repressive notions or hang-ups you may have about sex. That’s easy to say, but not
always easy to do. Just keep reminding yourself of those Scandinavian beliefs that sex is
a completely natural and beautiful act and that whatever consenting adults do to please
each other in the bedroom—or even in public—is entirely normal and acceptable.
If you’re trying to shed some of your inhibitions, start slowly and don’t expect to change
overnight. One of the best ways to work around any hang-ups you have is to talk openly
with your lover about your feelings about sex. You may find that a frank, open discussion
about it can be the key to breaking down sexual barriers. An added bonus to talking about
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sex is that it can turn you on and sometimes lead to a hot encounter.
As you become more in tune with your sexuality, enlist your lover’s help in your quest
for a more open-minded sexual attitude. Make every attempt to show more physical
affection to your lover throughout the day rather than only when you’re having sex. Non-
Basically, the more you expose yourself to all forms of physical affection and touching,
When you start feeling more at ease with your own physicality, start taking your
newfound open-mindedness to the next level. Try watching racy erotic films like 91/2
Weeks with your lover as a way to appreciate heated sexuality. You can also visit an adult
shop to view the many toys, videos and sex aids available. If you feel inspired, purchase
something that the two of you can use later. By taking these steps, you can begin to shed
any long-standing inhibitions. And once you give yourself over to the Nordic notion of
sexual freedom, you’ll feel more open to exploring daring new ways to enhance your
lovemaking.
As your attitude about sexuality begins to change, you may want to throw caution to the
wind and engage in playful and exciting exhibitionism or have fun being voyeurs. In
Scandinavia, showing off one’s sexuality with PDAs (public displays of affection) is
commonplace and rarely raises an eyebrow. Couples in bars and other public settings
often kiss and touch each other passionately without a thought about who might be
watching. And the people around the couple may barely notice their romantic embrace.
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For you, however, the act of doing something erotic in public might feel completely out
To start getting comfortable with exhibitionism and PDAs, make a pact with your lover
to tastefully touch each other fleetingly in your most erogenous zones while you’re out in
public. At a bar or restaurant, you might brush your fingers against her breast as you
drape your arm over her shoulder or you might brush your hand over his now pants-
covered hard-on. You won’t believe how much these secret touches can ignite your
desire.
Escalate your exhibitionist behavior by engaging in soulful kisses and tight embraces
while you’re at a party or at the beach. You will notice that all eyes will be on you and
your lover, which can turn up the heat for you both. As you continue to practice showing
off your sexuality, you will become more and more comfortable with passion and
eroticism in public and will want to take your exhibitionism experiment to daring new
heights.
Invite some of your favorite couples to your home for a sexy slumber party. During your
get-together with your friends, engage in PDA with your lover with even more carefree
abandon. Be brazen and let those fleeting erotic touches and delicious kisses with your
lover linger a little longer. If anybody is watching and enjoying your show, boldly return
their gaze. This flirty and seductive eye lock with a curious onlooker is guaranteed to
intensify your arousal. Don’t give in to your lusty desires just yet, though. Instead, use
your sleepover as an opportunity to reenact a sexy version of the Nordic night courtship
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ritual.
For this titillating adventure, have all the women sleep in one room and put the guys in a
different room. Men, sneak over to the women’s room and crawl into bed next to your
lover. Cover her with sweet kisses and caress her body as the other women in the room
watch with awe and sexual excitement as your silhouettes move sensually in the
darkness. This erotic action so close to your pals can make you feel like a very passionate
provocateur and is sure to excite you both as much as it turns on those watching you.
Now, grab a sheet from the bed and wrap it around your nude bodies as you go out to the
backyard pool area. Ideally, choose a spot where your friends can peek at you through a
window. Head for a cabana or some lounge chairs and stretch out on them together with
the sheet thrown over you. Kiss each other with wild abandon to get your sexual juices
flowing. As your tongues dance with each other, steal quick glances up at your friends
Move your erotic exhibition into the pool now for some wet and wild action. Slip into the
warm, inviting water, and sink down to your neck so his chest and her breasts are
covered. Clasp your arms around each other and pull your lover toward you for a long
kiss. Then let your tongue travel down their neck as you lick up the hot, steamy moisture
off their body. At the same time, let your hands roam over each other’s bodies beneath
the water, caressing his buttocks and torso and her thighs and breasts.
Have fun with the buoyancy the water provides by taking turns wrapping your legs
around each other. With her legs folded around his waist, she can arch her back and lean
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away so her beautiful breasts and aroused nipples rise to the surface of the water, and her
hair floats seductively to frame her face. This kind of visual stimulation will get his heart
racing, and knowing that your friends may still be watching will make it even more
thrilling for you both. When he wraps his legs around her hips, he can press his shaft
Shift your hands down to your lover’s genitals now to increase the stimulation and desire.
Women, grasp the shaft of his penis and bring your body close enough to his so you can
press the head against your vagina and rub it deliciously up and down against you. Then
push his member under your vagina and close your thighs around it without pressing too
tightly. Move your pelvis back and forth in a pulsating motion to mimic the sex act. The
friction of his penis rubbing between your legs can stimulate the clitoris and will create
When your passion overtakes you and you can’t wait any longer for sex, let her wrap her
legs around his body while he stands in the middle of the pool. Men, take note that the
water from the pool can wash away her natural lubricants, creating some discomfort for
her, so let her guide your penis into her gently. Because of this, keep your strokes slow
and tender while in the pool. You may want to take advantage of the natural buoyancy of
the water to lift her hips so you can angle your thrusting upward, which may provide
more friction on her G-spot. If she prefers direct stimulation, she can bring one of her
hands down to massage herself under the water. As you lose yourself in each other and
reach a hot climax, you may actually forget all about the audience that could be watching
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Being Naked
History of Sex
For Scandinavians, being naked is the most natural and beautiful thing in the world. And
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going sans clothing in nature—think beaches, fields of flowers or hiking trails—is
considered completely normal. This sense of comfort with nudity in natural settings has
been around for hundreds of years. In fact, in 1778, the word naturism was coined to
describe the concept of social nudism in harmony with nature. The naturism movement
spread throughout Europe and Scandinavia, resulting in hundreds of places where people
For example, there are beaches and lakes where you can go skinny dipping, canuding
(nude canoeing) or nude snorkeling. There are vacation resorts where you don’t have to
pack a stitch of clothing in your luggage, and there’s nude hiking and horseback riding
for you to enjoy. With all of these opportunities to go au natural, it’s no wonder that
Scandinavians feel so comfortable in their own skin, and consequently, don’t have a lot
Get in touch with your Scandinavian side by stripping away any self-consciousness you
have about being naked. Learning to feel completely at ease in the buff can lead to
greater self-confidence in your sexual encounters, which can have sexually ecstatic
results.
Could any ancient erotic custom be easier to adapt to your own life than being naked? All
you have to do to experience the freedom Scandinavians have enjoyed for centuries is
take off your clothes. What could be simpler than that? Whether you shed your clothes in
the privacy of your own home, or you get adventurous and go to a clothing-optional
beach wearing nothing but your birthday suit, you’ll soon learn why being comfortable in
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the nude is one of the best things you can do to enhance your lovemaking. That’s because
when you feel good about your body, you’re more likely to be completely uninhibited
during sex.
Even if you weren’t brought up with the Scandinavian belief that being naked is natural
and normal, you can learn to get comfortable with nothing on. Begin the process of
learning to love yourself naked by getting undressed and strutting around your own house
—just close the drapes if you don’t want any nosy neighbors to see you in the buff! If
you’re worried about your children becoming emotionally scarred if they catch you in the
nude, take note that Scandinavian studies show that kids who see their parents naked are
more likely to have a positive body image and are more comfortable with their sexuality.
That’s yet another reason why you should do like the Scandinavians and get naked.
A perfect time to practice being naked is after a shower or bath. Instead of slipping right
back into your clothes, remain nude while you fix your hair, shave or put on makeup.
After each time you bathe, stay in the nude a little bit longer. Eventually, you’ll begin to
feel more at ease sans clothing and before you know it, you’ll be eating, watching TV and
Invite your lover to join you in your “dare to be bare” experiment. Rather than peeling off
your attire solely when you’re ready for sex, disrobe whenever you’re together. Make a
romantic meal together wearing nothing at all or play a sexy game of backgammon in the
nude. The more often you see your lover and yourself completely naked, the more
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Go Au Natural in Nature
Get into the spirit of Nordic naturism and social nudity by going au natural outside. Ease
into public nudity by heading out to your own backyard at first to try a little topless
sunbathing or nude gardening. Feeling the warm sun and fresh breezes on your naked
If inspired, plan a trip with your lover to a clothing-optional beach, swimming pool or
resort for a full day of nudity. In the U.S., there are more than 250 clothing-optional
family resorts and scores of nude beaches. If being nude in the company of others feels
great to you, you may want to join a nudist club. These clubs, which host nudist events
and parties, can be found in nearly every state. To find clubs near you, contact the
Initially, you might feel a bit sheepish about shedding your clothes in front of a bunch of
strangers, but in these settings, you’ll soon discover that nobody is gawking at you. In
fact, most naturist sites have strict rules that include no ogling, no touching and no
inappropriate sexual behavior. But just because you can’t engage in a hot sexual interlude
in front of others at these sites and events, there’s nothing stopping you and your lover
from pleasuring each other from head to toe once you’re back in the privacy of your own
room or home.
For a true naturist sexual adventure, head off to the great outdoors with your lover.
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meadow or field of flowers. When you arrive in the perfect spot, undress each other so
you are both completely nude, rub in some sun protection and throw down a soft blanket
on the ground for later. Take a few moments to delight in the beauty of your surroundings
and your naked bodies by holding hands and running wild through the tall grass, flowers
or trees. Pick a few flowers and place them in each other’s hair if you like.
Clasping each other’s hands, face each other to admire your nude bodies. Still standing,
free your hands and let them travel up your lover’s arms until they’re resting on their
shoulders. Then let them cascade down their chest to their abdomen as you take in the
enticing sensations of their bare skin. With the sunlight kissing your uncovered skin, pull
your lover closer to you so your nude bodies are touching—your naked thighs, your
exposed breasts and chest, your bare bellies. Sink into each other for a warm French kiss
Men, push one of your thighs firmly between her legs so she can rub her clitoris against
it. In this standing position, you’ll be able to press your penis against her pelvis to create
irresistible friction that will stimulate you both. This standing foreplay is very arousing,
and you may only be able to take it for a few moments. When your bodies start to glisten
with sweat and she becomes wet, fall back into the grass and onto the blanket together.
Kneel in front of her while she lies on her back. Grab her pelvis and pull it up towards
you. She will naturally wrap her legs tightly around your waist. If the ground is hard, you
can bunch up the blanket under her shoulders to create a nice cushion. This position
creates a veritable feast for the eyes, allowing you both to continue admiring your nude
bodies.
Men, as you move rhythmically inside her, treat her to clitoral stimulation by wetting
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your thumb and rubbing it against her. The arousing sensations from your touch
combined with the enchanting feeling of the sun and wind on her bare skin will drive her
wild. And when she loses control and starts bucking her hips and arching her back in
ecstasy, it is sure to intensify your pleasure. At this point, take a sexy orgasmic roll
through the field, tumbling through the flowers and going deeper and deeper into each
other.
Guy was much more reserved about showing off his body than his girlfriend Kim, a
former cheerleader, who loved wearing nothing around the house. While Guy loved
watching Kim strut around in the buff, he preferred to be undressed only in the bath or in
bed. Kim wanted to shake Guy out of his puritan mindset about his own nudity. For his
birthday, she planned a fun surprise—a weekend away and she would pack for him.
When they arrived at the beach resort, Guy was really surprised to see everyone walking
around in their birthday suits. He laughed a bit nervously when he realized that was what
he would be wearing all weekend, too, since Kim had packed no clothes for him. He felt
a little embarrassed the first time they headed out to the beach without bathing suits, but
he soon realized that nobody was staring at him. After they lay on the beach for a while,
he worked up the courage to have drinks by the pool. With each passing hour, he felt
more and more at ease with his nudity. By the end of the weekend, he felt so comfortable
sans clothing that he attended an intimate birthday party thrown in his honor with other
nude guests.
It turned out to be the most revealing weekend of their relationship, stretching Guy way
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out of his comfort zone. Much to his surprise, Guy ended up having a blast. After that, his
inhibitions about nudity completely went out the window. And with that, a newfound
sexual confidence took hold. From then on, Guy was willing to incite sexual frolic with
Massage
History of Sex
Swedish massage, which is also referred to as “classic” massage, is currently the most
popular form of massage offered. The gliding strokes, deep kneading, vigorous rubbing,
light tapping and invigorating vibration used were developed more than 100 years ago. In
the past century, Swedish massage has become a godsend to men and women throughout
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Scandinavia and in every corner of the planet. The therapeutic stroking, kneading and
rubbing has encouraged relaxation and helped eliminate tension from the shoulders and
Even better, the firm but gentle Swedish strokes are often used as a luxurious and
intimate prelude to great sex. A massage can lead to greater intimacy and a deeper
connection with your lover. Not only that, it can also help you relax, making your body
even more responsive to erotic touching and sexual activity. And when your body feels
more open, you’ll experience stronger sensations and more intense orgasms.
You can vastly improve your own sex life by incorporating the Scandinavian art of
massage. Learning to caress your lover with smooth, sensual strokes can add a
deliciously intimate and arousing element to your foreplay and lovemaking repertoire.
The next time you and your lover are planning a date or a romantic evening, add a
soothing, sensual Swedish massage to the menu. The loving caresses and tender strokes
you use on each other’s bodies can do you both a world of good.
Rather than rushing into sex, take the time to offer each other a relaxing Swedish
massage as a form of erotic foreplay. Be sure to have some fragrant massage oil or
scented lotion on hand before you begin. Have your lover disrobe and lie face down on
the bed. Pour some oil or lotion into your hands and rub them together to warm it. Start
your massage by using the palms of your hands to make long, smooth strokes down the
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muscles of their back from the shoulders to the crease of the buttocks then sweep your
hands up the sides all the way to the neck. Keep repeating this sensual motion or add
variety by moving your hands in a circular motion, pressing your thumbs into the muscles
Shift your focus to their legs and feet. Take one foot in your hands and using firm
pressure to avoid tickling, rub your thumbs from the toes down the arch of the foot to the
heel. Then massage each toe individually, rubbing it between your thumb and forefinger.
For some people, this move ranks as one of the most delightful and erotic and will really
turn up the sexual heat. Move your hands slowly up the legs now in long, sweeping
motions that go from the foot toward the hip. Spend extra time on the sensitive inner
thighs to build excitement and desire for the incredible sex to come later.
Let your hands wander to the buttocks and press deeply into the cheeks as you knead
them beneath your hands. You may want to alternate between firm pressure and teasingly
light strokes here to excite your lover. Be sure to keep adding more oil or lotion as
needed to make your strokes glide more easily and remember to ask your lover if the
Have your lover turn over now so you can massage the front side of their body. Using
just your fingertips, stroke their face gently. Start by tracing your fingertips from the
crown of the head down the hairline to the temples where you can make soft circular
motions. Place your thumbs at the center of their forehead and brush them out to the
sides. Next, rub your fingertips lightly over their lips then past their chin, along their neck
Employ the same long, sweeping strokes you used on their back to massage their chest
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and let your hands slide all the way down to the genitals.
As you massage your lover, remember that this should be a sensual massage, not a sports
massage or deep tissue massage. Avoid overly aggressive kneading or pummeling the
muscles. The idea isn’t to work over your lover with an intense rubdown. It’s to soothe
and relax your beloved, and even more importantly, get him or her in the mood for a wild
sexual encounter.
Now is your chance to turn this relaxing massage into an amazing sexual interlude by
using many of the same techniques. Women, if you’ve been massaging your man, he’s
probably fully aroused by now. Spread his legs apart, kneel between them and add more
oil or lotion to your hands. Swirl your hands up his inner thighs and massage the crease
Interlock your thumbs and using the base of your hands, press his testicles up gently then
let your hands continue up to his shaft. Keeping your thumbs interlaced, use the same
long strokes you used on his back to sweep your hands up and down his penis, flattening
it against his abdomen. Keep rubbing your palms up and down his shaft and watch him
Then circle your fingers around the base to bring it up away from his belly and rub your
palms on either side of his penis as if you were trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks
together. Take it slow as you knead your palms up to the head of his penis and back down
to the base. Gradually speed up the motion and add more pressure as his excitement
grows. You’ll probably feel heat being generated between your hands from this
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incredibly sexy technique. When he nears orgasm, roll over so he’s on top of you and
Men, if you’ve been acting as masseur, turn your attention to her genitals. With tender
strokes, rub your palms and fingers over her pubic hair or her nude pubic area if she
shaves or waxes her pubic hair. Using both hands, spread her labia and take each vaginal
lip in between your thumb and fingers and knead them gently. Place the tips of your
index and middle fingers above her clitoris and separate them as you slide them down to
her vagina. Repeat this move several times to heat up her desire. Then press the palm of
your hand against her clitoris and rub it in slow, delicious circles, first in one direction
then the other. For some women, this will be enough to achieve indescribable pleasure,
but others will need more direct stimulation. In this case, be sure your hands are well-
lubricated and place your thumb and forefinger on her clitoris and gently rotate your
fingers until she writhes in ecstasy. Then lean over her and enter her in the missionary
position.
The missionary position may sound like it’s boring and traditional, but it gives men more
control to use some of the sensual Swedish massage techniques such as effleurage
lovemaking. Men, you can recreate many of these Swedish massage strokes using your
penis. Just as you would use long, smooth effleurage strokes to massage a person’s back,
use deep, slow strokes to massage the length of her vagina then change to quicker strokes
to vary the sensations as you make love. Alternate penetrating tapotement thrusts with
circular motions that will knead her into putty in your hands. Then add vigorous friction
by rubbing your pelvis against hers to drive her wild. By using these Swedish massage
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techniques during intercourse, you’ll create unbelievable sensations that will cause
intense vibration throughout your genitals and bring you both to an earth-shattering
climax.
Candace told me that she just couldn’t find anything that would get her in the mood for
intercourse. “It’s not that Ken isn’t trying,” she said, “it’s just that I’m not responding.” I
suggested that Ken give her a 10- to 15-minute massage. But here’s the catch—I told him
to do this massage without any expectations of sex. I also informed them that massage
will open up your body. When you receive a massage, stress and tension that causes your
body to contract and constrict your arousal can begin to melt away. It’s relaxing, it’s
energizing and it’s one of the simplest ways to get in the mood for sex.
The next night when they were both lying on their sides with Candace’s back to Ken, he
began to massage her back with no goal in mind. He just wanted to see if Candace
responded. Ken brushed his hands over her skin and then applied pressure to her tension
spots. He let his hands sweep over her hips and massaged her thighs. He then moved his
hands around to her torso and breasts and began to massage them gently.
The sensual massage made Candace feel very relaxed and to her surprise, turned on. She
began to move her body towards Ken, rubbing her hips against his pelvis. From there,
one move flowed naturally into the next. Becoming sufficiently wet, Candace grabbed on
to Ken’s buttocks and then began to massage his erect penis into her from behind. Even
though Ken hadn’t done the massage with sex in mind, it made Candace feel more
receptive to intercourse. They both felt it was the most organic and fulfilling sexual
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experience they’d had in a long time.
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Having the Best Sex in the World
Now that you have completed your initiation into the ancient and modern sexual arts
from around the globe, you are equipped with the know-how to have the best sex in the
world. I hope your sexual journey through 1,000 Years of Sexual Wisdom has nurtured a
sense of erotic adventure and playfulness as well as a willingness to open yourself to new
intimate experiences and to a more passionate connection with your lover and the world
around you. By tapping into your newfound sexual wisdom, you can take your
To keep the vibrancy of these new and exciting sex ideas and practices growing and
expanding in your love life, you can refer back to the pages in this book over and over
again. Flip open the book to any page for a thrilling look at how you can turn any sexual
encounter into a more satisfying experience. I’m certain that 1,000 Years of Sexual
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Acknowledgments
Thank you to all the important people who made 1000 Years of Sexual Wisdom possible.
I first want to thank my editor Frances Sharpe whose incredible skill and enthusiasm for
I want to thank all of my mentors and teachers who have guided and inspired my studies
I want to give a special thanks to Harley Swiftdeer, elder of the Deer Tribe, who granted
I want to express my gratitude to all the ancient people of the world who enjoyed and
celebrated meaningful sex with wonderful rituals for giving us the opportunity to bring
I especially want to thank all of my family and friends for their love and abundant
And lastly, I want to express my most heartfelt thanks to my husband Timothy for being
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
the author of the best-selling book, Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love, the
producer of the beautiful breakthrough DVD, Sacred Love-Making, and writes the
weekly column, “Ask Karinna”. Karinna’s unique approach to love, sex and intimacy,
which is based on 20 years of studying ancient and contemporary intimate wisdom, has
helped millions of people across the world enhance their romantic relationships. Karinna
has appeared on numerous television shows, including UK’s Million Dollar Romance and
NBC’s Emmy Award-winning Starting Over. She has also been featured in national
magazines including Spirituality and Health, Women’s Health, Self and Cosmopolitan, on
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