NLP Manual

Table of Contents
AUNLP™........................................................................................................................................................ 1
Introduction to NLP ...................................................................................................................................... 2
Chapter 1 ........................................................................................................................................................ 6
Questions and Answers About NLP ............................................................................................................ 7
Chapter 2 ........................................................................................................................................................ 9
Rapport....................................................................................................................................................... 10
Sensory Acuity........................................................................................................................................... 11
Opening Your Senses................................................................................................................................. 11
Wide Eyes (or Soft Eyes)........................................................................................................................... 12
Chapter 3 ...................................................................................................................................................... 13
Eye Accessing Cues (Movements) ............................................................................................................ 14
Representational Systems .......................................................................................................................... 18
Predicates ................................................................................................................................................... 20
Chapter 4 ...................................................................................................................................................... 21
Sensory Perceptual Strategies .................................................................................................................... 22
Chapter 5 ...................................................................................................................................................... 23
Sub-Modality Distinctions ......................................................................................................................... 24
Questions.................................................................................................................................................... 24
Visual..................................................................................................................................................... 24
Auditory ................................................................................................................................................ 25
Kinesthetic ............................................................................................................................................ 25
States of Excellence ................................................................................................................................... 26
Chapter 6 ...................................................................................................................................................... 27
Major Presuppositions of NLP .................................................................................................................. 28
Chapter 7 ...................................................................................................................................................... 29
Meta Model................................................................................................................................................ 30
Information Gathering: The Key to Successful Interactions ..................................................................... 31
The Key Questions................................................................................................................................. 31
Meta Model Chart ...................................................................................................................................... 32
DELETIONS......................................................................................................................................... 32
DISTORTIONS..................................................................................................................................... 32
GENERALIZATIONS .......................................................................................................................... 33
Anchoring .................................................................................................................................................. 35
Anchoring and Adding a Resource ............................................................................................................ 37
Chapter 8 ...................................................................................................................................................... 38
Chaining Anchors ...................................................................................................................................... 39
Behavior Transfer ...................................................................................................................................... 39
Changing Personal History ........................................................................................................................ 40
Lie / Truth Submodalities Exercise............................................................................................................ 41
Chapter 9 ...................................................................................................................................................... 43
Eliminating Fears ....................................................................................................................................... 44
The Visual Squash Exercise with Regression............................................................................................ 46
Visual Squash – Revised............................................................................................................................ 49
The Swish Pattern ...................................................................................................................................... 52
Swish Pattern Exercises ............................................................................................................................. 53
Computer Swish......................................................................................................................................... 54
Chapter 10 .................................................................................................................................................... 55
Godiva Chocolate Pattern .......................................................................................................................... 56
New Behavior Generator ........................................................................................................................... 57
NLP Handshake Interrupt (Instant) Induction ........................................................................................... 58
Re-Parenting .............................................................................................................................................. 59
How to Mend a Broken Heart.................................................................................................................... 60
6-Step Reframing Outline .......................................................................................................................... 63
NLP-Based “Nonverbal” Induction ........................................................................................................... 65
AUNLP™ Practitioner - 4
Building Self-Confidence .......................................................................................................................... 67
Developing Self-Appreciation ................................................................................................................... 68
Metaphor for Change ................................................................................................................................. 70
Appendix A: The Meta-Model................................................................................................................... 74
Three Universal Modeling Processes......................................................................................................... 75
Meta-Model Outline Summary:................................................................................................................. 87
APPENDIX B: Timelines ............................................................................................................................ 88
APPENDIX C: Dave Elman Induction ..................................................................................................... 92
APPENDIX D: Reframing .......................................................................................................................... 94
Glossary of Common NLP Terms .............................................................................................................. 96
References................................................................................................................................................... 101
NLP Practitioner Final Exam (Instructions)........................................................................................... 103
Chapter 1
Questions and Answers About NLP
Q. What’s a quick definition of NLP?

A. A unique model, it teaches people how to learn, how to motivate themselves, and
change their behavior. The goal: striving for excellence.
Q. Where does the name come from?

A. Alfred Habdank Skarbek Korzybsk, a pioneer in the field of Neurolinguistic
Programming said, “God may forgive you for your sins, but your nervous system
won’t." The Polish-American scientist believed that NLP is an integration of
neurology, psychology, linguistics, cybernetics, and systems theory. The
component of the term Neurolinguistic Programming describes what this obscure
and complex science encompasses. NEURO: all of our experiences, both conscious
and subconscious, are derived through and from our senses and central nervous
system. LINGUISTIC: our mental processes are given meaning, coded, organized,
and, then transformed through language. PROGRAMMING: people interact as a
system in which experience and communication are composed of sequences of
patterns or “programs.” His work gave birth to the Neurolinguistic Programming
or as we like to call it, NLP.
AANLP uses PSYCHOLOGY rather than Programming because Psychology

comes from “psyche” meaning “Spirit” and “ology”, the “study of systems.”
Q. How does NLP work?

A. It lets you model or copy human excellence in any form. In addition, you can
identify the things that make someone exceptionally skilled, acquire that skill for
yourself, pass it on and teach it to others. NLP improves the most important
aspects of your life: pushing yourself to be the best you can be, whether it’s with
your family or on the job.
Q. How and where can you use Neurolinguistic Programming?
A. Wherever human communications skills can enhance results: business consultation,
management, negotiation, education, counseling, therapy, relationships, parenting,
nursing, public speaking, sports performance and many other areas.
Q. What can I expect, in terms of an end result?

A. NLP helps therapists change the impact of the past on a client; boosts a teacher’s
capacity to teach and improves a student’s spelling skills; increases a
businessperson’s non-verbal rapport, assists them in running more efficient
meetings; enhances an athlete’s concentrations and more.
Q. How would you classify NLP?

A. A method of therapy, NLP’s applications are much broader. The process teaches
people how to use their brains. Most therapy is remedial, directed towards solving
problems from the past. NLP goes much deeper. It studies excellence and teaches
skills that promote positive change, which generates new possibilities and
opportunities.
Chapter 2
Rapport
Groups of three, Programmer chooses a situation:
1. You want to breathe in rhythm with the person. If they are breathing quickly, pace
them to slow down.
2. Echo or parallel the person’s posture and movements. Don’t mimic, flow with
them.
3. Match the kinds of words your client uses: If a client says they can’t see things
working out or can’t clearly picture the outcome, you should match the visual words
so they will clearly visualize the conclusion.
4. Go over everything the client said.
SPEND A COUPLE OF MINUTES DOING THIS, THEN:
Mismatch as many words, processes, and questions you can.
Note: All of these Rapport Techniques should be used with subtlety so clients aren’t
aware of your actions. Remember you want to be calm, centered, relaxed and positive.
Remain focused. Think Creatively. Positively. Visualize Success!
Sensory Acuity
You are only as good in NLP as the information you own. Sensory acuity is
extremely important when gathering the right information. These exercises will help
improve your sensory acuity.
Opening Your Senses

Visual * Auditory * Kinesthetic
1) Kinesthetic (sense of touch) -

Groups of three people - 2 Programmers and 1 Experiencer
Ask the Experiencer to close their eyes. This helps them access a highly
charged kinesthetic state. Remember a moment when you were in tune
with your body. Each Programmer touches the Experiencer’s hand or wrist
and calls out his/her name. When the Experiencer finally distinguishes the
touches, TEST the kinesthetic sense. Repeat the process on a sleeve or
another article of clothing.
Stretch the exercise: this time the touches should be as close to the same
space as possible. Then rotate the exercise so everyone experiences the
position of Experiencer.
2) Auditory -
Same group of three people - 2 Programmers and 1 Experiencer
In this exercise you want the Experiencer to access a vivid auditory state.
Each Programmer produces simple sounds: claps, finger snaps, hand
rubbing anything that can be done on the spot.
Call out the Programmer’s name. The moment the Experiencer
distinguishes between the sounds, TEST the auditory sense.
Again, rotate until each of you experiences the position of the
Experiencer.
3) Visual -
Same group: 1 Programmer; 1 Experiencer; and 1 Meta Person or watcher:
You want the Experiencer to access a very clear visual state.
While this is happening, the Programmer sits down and the Experiencer
takes a mental photograph of the Programmer’s position. Once it’s
embedded in his/her mind, the Experiencer shuts his or her eyes.
Now the Programmer shifts or moves, which challenges the Experiencer
to identify the changes.
As you’ve done before, rotate the exercise until everyone experiences the
position of the Experiencer.
Wide Eyes (or Soft Eyes)
Stand with your feet shoulder width apart. Put your hands in front of you with the
index finger extended. Focus on your fingers.
Pull your fingers apart. Stop when they’re out of your sight line.
Repeat the procedure: If you think about “wide eyes” or “soft eyes” you should be
able to expand your field of vision.
* Again, do it daily for as long as you follow this curriculum.
Chapter 3
Eye Accessing Cues (Movements)
Study the diagram and you’ll see the direction of a person’s eyes as they accesses
movements while you are face-to-face with that person.
As we process information we do it visually, auditorily, kinesthetically, olfactorally, or

gustatorally. It’s possible to access the meaning of a word in one, or any combination, of the five
sensory channels.
VC Visual Created: View images of things you’ve never seen or look at

them differently. For instance: “What will my
appearance be like or how will I appear to others
when I’m 90?”
AC Auditory Created: Hearing sounds for the first time. Questions to ask:
“How would I feel hearing my name backwards?”
“What about a combination of: dogs barking, car
horns blaring and children having fun on the
playground?
K Kinesthetic: What’s the emotional context with tactile sensations
– running barefoot through the grass and you ask
how does it feel? Or how about the perceptive
feeling or muscle movement, where you wonder,
ask, How cold is your nose?”
VR Visual Remembered: You’ve seen something before, but somehow

looking at it this time is like seeing it for the first
time. Pose this question: “Tell me what the raincoat
and umbrella look like?”
AR Auditory Recall a familiar sound: “What did I say before we

Remembered: hung up the other night?” “Can you describe your
garden?”
ID Internal Dialog: A conversation with yourself is more than common,

so get yourself to repeat something you know by
heart: lyrics to your favorite song or poem; your
family’s birthdays.
V Visual: A blank stare makes an impression, a real visual that

is something you think of or develop.
Author and psychotherapist, Virginia Satir, is just one of many who have observed
that people move their eyes in systematic directions. The movement, eye-accessing cues,
depends on what the person is thinking. The chart above indicates the kind of processing
most people do when they move their eyes in a particular direction; however, a small
percentage of people are “reversed” or mirror image the chart.
Eye accessing cues: a car salesman might stress different features to a customer once
he keys into the customer’s primary representational system. The salesman “steps into his
model of the world.” Auditory customers: the salesman stresses the quiet ride, the thud of
the reinforced doors and the upscale stereo system. Visual customers: the salesman
points out the clean, sleek lines; the clear view of the scenery through the large tinted
windows and sunroof. If he’s really in tune with the customer’s visual needs he should
ask them to imagine themselves on the open road behind the wheel on a beautiful clear
day. A kinesthetic person might respond to the feel of full grain leather seats and a
smooth ride that makes you feel like you’re floating on air, the freedom you get with the
wind in your hair and the warmth of the sun caressing your face. A smart salesman goes
for all the senses because we all use, and respond to, more than one system. A great deal
of the time, decisions like this are made with the help of a parent or spouse. The more
systems at work the better the other systems respond.
As therapists we learn this is another way of gaining rapport with our clients. We
phrase our inductions by using a representational system, which gets them to respond.
An auditory husband leaves his socks on the floor, dishes on the table, shoes in the
corner, newspapers all over the place. A visual wife thinks she’s married a total slob
who doesn’t appreciate the way she strives to keep a picture perfect house. “If he loved
me”, she thinks, “He’d understand and appreciate how much I do for him.”
On the flip side, the auditory husband comes home to his castle after a demanding
day at work. Stress-free at last, his only desire: read the paper in silence. Nope! The
sounds of the food processor, TV, CD player and hungry dog converge at the same
moment. Impossible to focus on his visual task, the auditory husband asks, “Can’t I get
some peace and quiet in my own home?” More misunderstandings.
A trip to divorce court could be avoided if the parties involved realized:
Visual appearances are important to the wife, but make absolutely no impression
on the auditory spouse.
Normal household noise, more punishing to the auditory husband make no
impression on the visual wife.
Communication and understanding differences makes any sort of living arrangement

run more smoothly.
If your teenager breaks curfew, asking why they’re late is one way to utilize eye-
accessing cues. If the they look up and left, they’re visually remembering and telling you
where they were. If they look up and right (visual construct), it’s possible they’re making
it up as they go. They may not be lying, but it’s time for the parent to probe a little
deeper.
Not sure how to do it? Learn from the best. Watch great interviewers like Oprah
and Larry King get the answers they want. Good, thoughtful questions come from
listening to the subject. Listening is the key. People readily respond, sub-consciously.
Tape the shows. Study those eye-accessing cues and take a cue from the best.
Representational Systems
Seeing [Visual]
Eyes As people gaze up or down, right or left, you look at the eyes that
seem to lack focus.
Gestures You can make them speedy, sudden and sharp, which includes
pointing.
Breathing & Elevated, thin and rapid.
Speech Swift
Words Words that gain notice:
Observe, watch, envision, disclose, viewpoint.
Presentations They choose images, illustrations, films.
Hearing [Auditory]
Eyes People who look down to the left and may seem “shifty-eyed."
Gestures If gestures are in balance, like thinking and rubbing your chin.
Breathing & Mid-chest: cadenced.
Speech Talk in a musical patter.
Words Words that obtain other people’s notice:
Heed, listen, question, enlighten, clicks, in-tune.
Presentations People favor lists, summaries, quotations, read.
Feeling [Kinesthetic]
Eyes Those of us who look down to the right.

Gestures Those of us whose gestures are rhythmic –
which is very common for men – touching
their chests when talking, providing sincerity.
Breathing & Profound, measured with silences.
Speech Talks bit by bit.
Words Words that seize attention:
Experience, pat, clutch, comprehend, bond.
Presentations Aiming for objectives: accomplish, conquer,
profit.
Getting away from issues: evade, alleviate,
exposed.
To be more persuasive with all groups, make the representation: BIGGER,

CLOSER, MORE COLORFUL, 3-D, MOVIE.
Predicates
The following are predicates (verbs, adverbs and adjectives) associated with
specific representational systems. To detect the primary representational system - listen
to a person’s language: how they construct sentences, how they use predicates.
Visual Auditory Kinesthetic Unspecified Olfactory/Gust
Hazy Outspoken Grip Indicate Fresh

Observe Articulate Warm Consider Bland
Flash Scream Rush Motivate Stale
Focus Pronounce Firm Plan Fresh
Bright Remark Euphoric Anticipate Bitter
Scene Resonate Clammy Create Salty
Perspective Harmony Touch Generate Nutty
Imagine Shrill Calm Deduce Delicious
View Oral Dull Direct Salivate
Vista Whimper Burning Achieve Spoiled
See Sound Feel Think Smell
Picture Hear Relax Decide Fragrant
Perceive Discuss Grasp Understand Stink
Notice Listen Handle Know Reek
Look Talk Stress Develop Aroma
Show Call on Pressure Prepare Pungent
Appear Quiet Smooth Activate Sour
Clear Inquire Clumsy Manage Sweet
Pretty Noisy Rough Repeat Acrid
Colorful Loud Hard Advise Musty
Horizon Mention Stinging Accomplish Sniff
Make a scene Tongue-tied Get the drift Initiate Smokey
Tunnel vision Ring a bell Boils down to Conclude Bitter pill
Plainly see Loud and clear Hang in there New Fish notion
knowledge
Catch a Rap session Moment of Incorporate
glimpse panic
Bright future Unheard of Smooth operator Differentiate
In light of Call on Get the drift Represent
See eye-to-eye Idle talk Sharp as a tack Creative option
Mind’s eye To tell the Slipped my Aware of
truth mind
Bird’s eye view Word for word Pull some Intensify
strings
Chapter 4
Sensory Perceptual Strategies
Every person has his or her own Sensory Perceptual Strategy program, which he
uses to communicate. These strategies are the primary, secondary and tertiary
representational styles of the communicator. A person can be a V-A-K - Visual-
Auditory-Kinesthetic. When you communicate with that person, use processor words
that go hand-in-hand with V-A-K strategy. You should do this with all representational
strategies.
Possible strategies? An infinite number, but the six most common:

V-A-K Visual-Auditory-Kinesthetic
V-K-A Visual-Kinesthetic-Auditory
K-V-A Kinesthetic-Visual-Auditory
K-A-V Kinesthetic-Auditory-Visual
A-V-K Auditory-Visual-Kinesthetic
A-K-V Auditory-Kinesthetic-Visual
It’s so easy to learn another person’s Sensory Perceptual Style, or representational

strategy. Make it simple. UNPACK it! Ask the person to remember a happy moment in
their lives. Probe. Ask what made them so happy. Don’t stop. Come at the questions
from different angles and listen for those processor words. Inevitably, you’ll get the
answers, they’ll tell you what they saw, experienced or heard. Once they’ve told you
three times, you’ve got it, their basic strategy. To communicate effectively with them,
develop rapport, PLAYBACK their strategy.
Strategy playback makes you a silent partner or co-conspirator. You communicate

with that person in their modalities of reality. You use the same order or representation,
such as V-A-K, but in a different context. You tell them a story with the appropriate
processor words. When they experience this story through their sensory perceptual style,
they’ll develop rapport with you. Communication will be instantaneous. More and more
people will enjoy your company because you communicate effectively with them. They
won’t even realize it. They’ll just like it.
Chapter 5
Sub-Modality Distinctions
Modality Sub-Modality Questions

Visual Color/Black & White Do you want black and white?
What about full-color spectrum?
How bright or dull are the colors?
Brightness When looking, does it appear brighter or darker
than normal?
Contrast What about the intensity versus the lackluster?
Focus And the visual – clear & crisp or just plain hazy?
Texture How dies it appear: velvety or coarse?
Detail Can you spot foreground and background
details?
How do you see or define the details as part
of a whole? Is it necessary to shift focus to
keep them in view?
Size Ask for the exact size of the picture?
Distance And, get the distance, how far is it -- exactly.
Shape Get the description: shapes of the picture --- angles
- square, rectangular, round?
Border Ask them to describe borders, if there is one
and what’s the feel?
What kinds of colors are there?
How thick or deep is it?
Location Get a description of the location within the
space?
Describe – using both where and how uou
see the pictures?
Movement Freeze frame? Movie? Still picture?
And, the speed of the movement – slower,
faster than the usual rate?
Can the image remain secure?
What direction is it moving?
What’s the speed of that movement?
Orientation Does the picture slant one way or the other?
Association / How do you imagine or view yourself – or as if you
Dissociation were in the middle of the event?
Perspective What’s your perspective?
Should it be If Dissociated, is your view of
yourself form the either side (right/left) Do
you see yourself from the right or left,
behind or facing you?
Proportion What about people and/or things within the frame,
are they in proportion to each other, as well as you?
Do they appear tinier or bigger than life?
Dimension Are they flat or is it 3-D?
Do you perceive the features envelop you?
Singular / Plural How many pictures are there?
Can you see them in succession or all at
once?
Auditory Location Where does the sound come from? In or
out?
Pitch High or low-pitched?

And, is it higher or lower than it usually is?
Tonality Ask about the tonality: twangy, deep, full-bodied,
husky, smokey, throaty, like nails on a chalkboard?
Melody Is it all the same - boring or is there a harmonious
scale?
Inflection What’s accentuated?
Volume What about the volume - loud?
Tempo The speed? Quick? Deliberate?
Rhythm Is there a certain pulse or regularity?
Duration Does it stop and go or is it constant?
Mono / Stereo Is it like surround sound or do you hear it from one
particular side?
Kinesthetic Intensity How powerful is the feeling?
Quality Can you illustrate the body sensations: prickly,
cool, hot tranquil, edgy, tangled, subtle?
Location Where parts of your body feel it, if you feel it?
Movement Does the sensation provide any movement?
And if there is, is it uninterrupted or does it
move in a regular pattern?
Direction Where does it begin?
How does it move --- from the point where
it starts to its most startling?
Speed How does it move – steady stream or full-throttle?
Duration Uninterrupted? Irregular?
States of Excellence
Groups of three (Programmer, Client, and Meta-person roles) standing:
1. Identify Excellent State. “Decide upon the states or levels of excellence in your life
and what state do you want your resources available to you?”
2. Organize a Circle of Excellence. “I want you to envision a circle of excellence right

in front of you. Tell me about the colors and sounds, if there are any?”
3. Access Excellence Circle and ANCHOR. “ Reflect back on your life when you were
in a place that was completely blissful. As it envelops you, step into that circle.”
Every experience or access to this tranquil spot should help you step into the circle
and the programmer should place one hand on the client’s shoulder - The Anchor.
4. Separator State/Testing. “Come out of the circle, relax for a moment, then walk
back into the circle – Anchor - and discover just how completely you produce those
feelings. Now, remove yourself from the circle, breathe, enjoy the moment.”
5. Desired Context. “From now on, whenever I touch you on the shoulder - Anchor –
walk back into the circle. Visualize a future situation, or set of circumstances where
you want to experience or feel this exalted state.
6. Chaining. “As I touch your shoulder – Anchor – I’d like you to return to the circle
and recapture that exalted state. Breathe ---- wait a moment. Think about how,
precisely that old problem will be different?
7. Testing. Ask your client to leave the circle, get them to think about where they want
help. Ask them to explain the non-verbal areas.
Chapter 6
Major Presuppositions of NLP
NLP is one way of looking at the world:
1. Communication is a constant.
2. The way you communicate elicits a response.
3. People reply to their perceived sense of reality, as opposed to what’s really going on.
4. There should be variety. An element with the most flexibility is usually the
controlling element within a system.
5. People make the best choice available to them.
6. All behaviors are constructive in some way.
7. There is structure in experience. Chunking. We can achieve anything if it’s broken
into tiny doses.
8. Usually we have most of what we need.
9. We don’t fail. We try, and improve with feedback.
10. And, when things are out of control, not pushing you forward, make a left or right
turn and try another route.
Chapter 7
Meta Model
Developed by John Grinder and Richard Bandler, the Meta Model, which
bears a close resemblance to the list of ten “cognitive distortions” found in Cognitive-
Behavioral Therapy, identifies common language patterns and hampers first-class
communication. Meta opens the channels, demonstrates how to tackle the problems and
paves the way for simpler, more effective communication.
The Meta Model covers a variety of misleading language patterns such as:
Unspecified nouns, unspecified verbs, unqualified comparisons, missing referential
indices, unqualified absolutes, and unquestioned rules. Each are described in the glossary
under relevant headings: Deletions, Distortions, Generalizations, Nouns, unspecified,
Verbs, and so on. (For a detailed discussion of the meta model, please see Appendix A).
Information Gathering: The Key to Successful Interactions
The Meta Model
The Key Questions
1) What do you desire?
a) Put it in positive terms

b) The client should start, be in command.
c) Precise-Sensory Based - See - Hear - Feel
d) Little bits – small portions
1A) What will that particularly provide for you?
2) When will you be aware you’ve got it?
3) Decide with whom you want it – Where, as well as, when?
a) Make it sensory based and environmentally friendly
3A) What about the affects on you and the other people in your life?
4) What keeps you from getting what you want --- now?
5) Are there assets you own that might help you reach the final result?
6) What else do you need to reach that goal?
7) What’s the route you need to take to get there?
a) Start with goals that you can achieve - be specific.

b) Try every possible path to realize your dream.
Meta Model Chart
PATTERN
DELETIONS
Nominalizations: Use process words: verbs that become nouns
Unspecified Verbs: “He eliminated me.”
Simple Deletions:
(a) Simple Deletions: Ex: “I am embarrassed.”
(b) Lack of Referential Index: Ex: “They pay no attention to me.”
Unsuccessfully specifies a specific person or thing.
Comparative Deletions:
Ex: “She’s a healthier person.”
Decent, superior, best, extra, fewest, inferior, worst
DISTORTIONS
Mind Reading:
Understand Someone’s Internal State - “Why don’t you like me.”
Lost Performative:
Value Judgments – The Person who does the Judging is omitted:
Inconsistency is a no-no.
Cause – Effect: (A>B)
How is cause incorrectly placed outside oneself?
i.e.: You make me sad.
Complex Equivalence: (A=B)
Presuppositions:
“If my wife knew how hard I tried to surprise her, she would stop asking
questions.”
3 Presuppositions:
1. I try
2. My wife reacts strongly
3. My wife husband doesn’t know I try to make her happy.
GENERALIZATIONS
Universal Quantifiers:
All, every, never, everyone, no one, and so on…
Ex: “She never pays attention to me.”
Modal Operators
(a) Required Modal Operators of necessity: should, shouldn’t, must, must
not, have to, need to, it is necessary
Ex: “I must take care of her.”
(b) Modal Operators of Possible or impossible: can/can’t, will/won’t,
may/may not,
possible/impossible
i.e.: “How can I tell her the truth?”
Nominalization
This is the process of turning a verb into a noun - “to educate” becomes
“education.” The verb form is clear-cut. The noun form is not. A common NLP
expression: “You can’t put a nominalization in a wheelbarrow.”
Politicians love nominalizations. Why? They talk without saying anything at all.
Anchoring
Multiple Accessing Representations
Communication with a client achieves a much-desired level of rapport and

changes as often as the discussion changes. To that end it’s important to have a back-up
plan, which quickly re-establishes the initial method of rapport. Anchoring is the ticket:
1) You can establish an anchor quickly. Repeated motivations and

conditioning reinforces an anchor.
2) It’s not necessary to use reinforcement and direct rewards for an anchor’s
association.
3) Internal responses and experiences are significant, but internal reactions are
impossible to measure....they are a definitive response.
4) Anchors are “set” and “fired off”. The more profound the experience when
the catalyst is set, the stronger the retaliatory response.
5) Timing is crucial when you establish an anchor. Use the correct trigger and
you’ll get the desired response. The strength of that response guides your client’s
mind down the necessary and desired path.
6) The more original the motivation, the easier it will be to reestablish the
desired rapport. The repercussions of mixed responses due to general stimuli
can be detrimental to the client as well as to your entire relationship. If you
establish unique stimuli, you’ll discover there is less room for error, and you’ll
easily re-access the desired state.
7) Anchors can be established in the visual, auditory, and kinesthetic

representational systems.
8) Anchors are set and fired off consciously and unconsciously. People
regularly create anchors in everyday experiences. Breaking news or an on-going
event can trigger positive or negative feelings. After that, anything tied to that
event will elicit a certain response. An anchor has been “set” and “fired off.”
Anchoring and Adding a Resource
1. Identify Resourceful Behavior or State. “Consider what you do well, some behavior
or state that you’d like to improve.
2. Access and ANCHOR #1. “What’s that behavior like?” As your client accesses that
state, reach over and ANCHOR it with a touch of your arm.
3. Identify Additional Resource (#2). “Think of some other resource state or behavior
that you can add so that you’ll be even more delighted with that resourceful
behavior.” As they access this resource, ANCHOR it with a touch of your other arm.
4. Integration. “Take this resource (fire ANCHOR #2) and relive that resourceful
behavior (fire ANCHOR #1) with the additional resource available to you. Watch
and listen to everything that happens as those two experiences combine. You’ll be
even more effective. Take the time you need and come on back.”
5. Test. Fire ANCHOR #1 and look for a new response.
Note: Anchors should be set (installed) at the peak of the experience. Make sure your
client uses all of the senses - sight, sound, feel, smell, touch and taste - that were
associated with their experience. Ask your client to nod when they reach the very
peak of that experience. Now, set the anchor. Why now? You can easily call up
that particular desired state when needed.
Chapter 8
Chaining Anchors
1) Elicit Dissociation
“Look at yourself from my point of view.”
“Pretend you’re in a movie theater, on the screen.”
Anchor this Dissociated State. Anchor # 1
2) Elicit Stuck (Problem) State.

Anchor. Anchor # 2
3) Chain to Dissociation
Fire Anchor # 2 , which is Stuck/Problem and fire Anchor #1 with you on
the screen
4) Test - Have your client think of stuck/problem.
Behavior Transfer
5) Choose the past resource or behavior you want to use in the problem/stuck state.
6) Think of a time you had this.

Anchor. Anchor # 3
7) Fire #2, then #1, and finally #3.

Whenever you find yourself in this situation (Fire #2), pull back (Fire #1)
and then like magic you’ll find yourself resourceful. (Fire #3)
8) Attach a self-anchor, if you think it’s appropriate.
Changing Personal History
1. Identify the Problem State. “Remember when things didn’t go the way you wanted
them to. You’d like to feel differently about the memory. You still think of that
memory from time to time. You’d like to lose the bad feelings it provokes.”
2. Access and ANCHOR the Problem State. “Do you feel bad, thinking about this
now?”
3. Identify the Resource. “What resource - courage, humor, alertness, etc. - would have
made it possible for you to have had a much more useful experience in that
situation?”
4. Access & ANCHOR (#2) Resource State. “Think about a moment when you
experienced a great deal of this resource.” While your client accesses this state,
ANCHOR it with a different touch (ANCHOR #2).
5. Break State.
6. Integration. “You should use this special resource (fire ANCHOR #2) and back into
the problem memory (fire ANCHOR #1). Find out what happens with this resource,
now available to you. Watch and listen as you relive the old memory in a new way.
Take your time, and then come on back.”
7. Test. Ask the client about that memory. Check non-verbal responses.
Lie / Truth Submodalities Exercise
1. You can perform the lie-truth exercise - Tell one the truth: something unbelievable
from your past. Make up a believable fabrication. You should tell both stories to the
group. Ask them which was true? False? Don’t reveal anything, just yet.
2. Get your group into pairs and elicit the submodalities of:
A: The truth
B: The lie
3. Map across and make the lie like the truth and the truth a lie.
4. Test
5. Switch
Where is this useful in the real world? For the teller and listener! The exercise
teaches you how to utilize your sub-modalities when you’re telling a story, truths and
lies, as well as how to pick up clues when you’re listening to someone else. Pay attention
to what you feel, whether it’s the truth or a lie.
Watch a movie. Make a conscious effort to track the unimportant details that either
sell you on the movie or totally blow the plausibility. If the minutia is plausible, you’ll go
with the larger “lies”.
Once you strike up rapport with someone, mirror and match them while they’re
regaling you with their latest escapade. Go into “think” mode and listen carefully. That
zone or rapport will help you distinguish the truth from the tale they’re embellishing.
External behavior models an internal process. If you share that rapport, you’ll fine-tune
your senses while you listen. Great actors on film understand the art of listening
transcends the screen and makes the audience feel their pain or joy.
That’s why it’s harder to lie or be lied to by family and friends as opposed to
strangers. The better your rapport the more in tune you are with each other.
If you’re telling a story, dig deep and use your sub-modalities to sell that story. Be
the best raconteur you can be. The more in state you are, the harder it will be for the
listener to tell the difference between fact and fiction. If you try to build rapport while
you’re engaged in storytelling, make sure you mirror and match the listener. It becomes
even more difficult for your audience to decipher the truth – or the lie!
Subtlety is a no-no! You won’t get anywhere. Rapport will be elusive. If you want to
be effective - be blatant!
Chapter 9
Eliminating Fears
The Fast Fear Relief Technique
This technique neutralizes the powerful, negative feelings of fears and traumatic
events.
Remember: A phobia takes over when people are stuck or caught in a situation
that frightens them or catches them off-guard. Translation: perceived danger becomes the
phobia. Individuals can do what psychologists call “one-trial learning” proof that the
human brain learns and re-learns quite rapidly. Voilà, a new way for you or your client to
respond to old traumas!
That hidden, but important, part of you that’s been protecting you all these years with
those unwanted phobias is important and valuable. We need and want to preserve the
ability to protect ourselves in dangerous situations. The purpose: refine and improve
your brain’s ability to protect you by updating the information.
1. With your eyes open or closed, imagine sitting in the middle of a movie theater.
Visualize a black and white snapshot of you up there on the screen.
2. Float out of your body, up into the projection booth and look down at your other self,
curled up in the best seat in the house, then past the orchestra seats up to that black
and white glossy of you on the screen. If this makes you nervous, protect yourself
with imaginary Plexiglas over the booth’s hole.
3. Watch and listen, protected in your own little corner, as you view the black and white
movie of a younger you going through a thorny situation, the one that brought on the
phobia. Pay attention to every little detail. Don’t miss a beat. The problem might
have started seconds before the actual disaster. Follow it through until the end, then
even beyond when something resembling next to normal took over.
You must be detached, a spectator in your own drama. If not, decrease the size of
the screen, zoom out and make it smaller. Follow this up by using your imagination to
create a grainier more sepia looking picture, drain the color. Stop and start the film. Re-
wind, if necessary. But, detach yourself. And, instead of THE END, freeze that last
frame, the one after the event that caused you to stumble, fall and maybe even hide all
these years.
4. On that frozen frame you leave the projection booth and slip back into the present you
down there in the middle of the theatre. Step into the freeze frame of the younger you,
who feels OK again, as the movie comes to an end. This is double dissociation. An
instant re-play, in about two seconds or less, of the experience, but backwards and in
color, is next on your agenda. Go all the way back, before the beginning, before once
upon a time. See, hear, and feel everything, backwards in those two seconds or less.
5. Test the process - attempt to return to the phobic state any way you can. What if you
were in that situation now? When will you next encounter one of these situations? If
you still get a phobic response, repeat steps 1 to 4 exactly, but faster each time, until
none of the phobic response remains.
Because you were traumatized, you’ve stayed far away from those situations, which
made you feel phobic. Hiding never gave you the chance to face them or learn how to
control your feelings. As you begin to encounter and explore these situations in the
future, exercise a certain degree of caution until you’re more comfortable with them.
The Visual Squash Exercise with Regression
“Classic”
Once you sort a conflict into its two parts, your next step - integrate the two by
combining or integrating the anchors of the two sides. You accomplish this with the
“Visual Squash.”
1. Access and get outcome for side #1 - the part that wants to change. Put one
polarity in the hand that is appropriate. You’ll see what that part of you looks like.
You’ll hear its tone of voice and so on. Do you realize how valuable this is
(positive outcomes or functions)? Another way to attack the issue, ask that part
just how positive that function is? Keep that part in that hand, as you turn to look
at your other hand.
2. Access and get outcome for side #2 - the part that resists change. Do the same
thing with the other polarity in the opposite hand. It might help you to
consciously remember the events that continue to hold you back. Perhaps, you’ll
remember fragments of this, or these, events. You might be very surprised at how
your pre-conscious takes you back to these experiences now…take a beat, a
pause…rest.
Often our pre-conscious minds misinterpret events or situations. Parents and

authority figures constantly remind us to work harder so we can achieve something in
life, other wise you’re bound to be a loser. Our minds only hear the negative. Sometimes
an event that failed ---- a dropped ball, a bad move, a split second pause, that forces us to
replay these events as if they were a part of us right now. Instead of something we can
learn from.
Now you should invite this part to release the event and any others that might hold
you back, keep you from moving forward. This should free you to see yourself, these
events or causes in a new light.
3. Mutual appreciation of outcome – With outstretched arms, look straight ahead
and watch both hands as they turn to face each other. Ask each one if it
understands and appreciates the value of the other. Each polarity should express
some appreciation for the positive or valuable function of its partner.
4. Integration of parts – Take your pick of any of the following verbalizations.

A. Watch and listen to both of these valuable parts of yourself. Let your hands
come together at their own pace, blend and integrate in an easy comfortable
manner. Each should retain its own identity, importance and usefulness, however
they should pick up or gather qualities and capacities they lack or need. They are
gifting each other.
B. You’ll fixate on the changes as the separate images come together…and

assimilate each other’s parts. Once the two images converge you’ll be surprised
by the picture they present as they become one, as they melt into each other and
take on each other’s capacities. Absorb this new image. It represents a
combination of brand new abilities. You’re about to enjoy additional skills and
skills that you never imagined. A new beginning, a new way of accomplishing
important outcomes simultaneously.
When the integration is complete, pay special attention to your client simultaneously
observing their facial expressions, breathing and posture as their hands merge.
5. Associate with the new integrated part - When it’s time, physically use your
hands to bring this part into yourself – into your body, so that it easily and readily
becomes part of you and your behaviors. You’ll feel a surge of energy in your
body as the hands reunite with you. Please make time to appreciate and enjoy the
qualities of this unique experience.
6. Future-Pace – Give some thought to how and when you want to integrate these
qualities, where they can be used to their fullest in the future…”
Visual Squash – Revised
By Steve G. Jones
There are some changes to the Visual Squash. For those of who need some
clarification, you use a Visual Squash when your client has a polarity response. Part of
them wants to do something; part of them fights it. The best time to use it is when a part
of that person wants to give up emotional eating, while the other part wants their comfort
food.
1) You can start the Visual Squash by proposing the client think of a person,
place, or thing they love. Help them locate the feeling - ask them to describe the color,
shape, sound and where it sits inside of them.
2) Use a Dave Elman or my Escalator technique to get your client into a relaxed
state, nothing too deep, just relaxed, enough to get their conscious mind out of the way.
Once they’ve reached this zone:
3) Ask them to picture, in their mind’s eye, exactly what they want to change, the
part that brought them to this place and that really wants to reach this goal. And, you
should repeat it here, in the positive, of course. If the client has given you their reasons
this is a good time to list them - better health, more confidence, a new look, whatever
they desire. There may be others you’re not consciously aware of. That’s okay. The
amorphous feelings will begin to take shape and color with sounds and feelings. It’s your
client’s vision – anything from a white cloud to a pink heart. Who knows? Forms need
thanks, from your client and you. Don’t forget. They only want what’s best for you.
4) Next on the agenda, get your client to imagine, again, that part of, for
whatever reason, stops them from achieving their goal. The reasons may or may not be
clear, or rise to a conscious level. That’s okay. Make sure this part matures into a color, a
shape, sound, and feeling. Anything works. You want your client to understand the part
of you that holds them back, keeps them from achieving this particular goal. You and
your client should thank this part. We may not like what it has done, but it’s been doing
it for a reason. You want this part to look at each of the behaviors and beliefs that created
the issue. When we’re growing, maturing, we absorb unintended patterns. As children
we often hear, “Clean your plate, people are starving in parts of the world.” What do our
parents really mean? They want us to be careful, don’t want us to waste or overeat. What
we hear might be very different, a perfect example of mis-learning information.
You can insert specifics here:
A. Sometimes, our subconscious minds misunderstand events or situations.
B. Often a parent or authority figure tells us, “work harder or you’ll never
succeed,” or “you’re a loser”. Unfortunately our minds tend to hang onto the negative.
C. Sometimes an event that failed - dropped ball, bad move, split-second pause,
causes us to replay these events as if they were part of us, as opposed to an innocent
moment that we can learn from.
5) This is the moment you want to invite this part to release the event and any
others that hold you back. This is the time you begin to see these events or causes in a
new light and your life changes direction, all for the better.
This part is embarking on a new journey, relearning what it needs to do so it can
take better care of you.
6) In your mind’s eye, get these two parts to face and acknowledge each other.
You might even begin to notice an energy connection between the two because each part
realizes they’re gaining something, not losing something. Each has something the other
needs and they’ll each be stronger as they fuse together, forming a more perfect union.
7) It’s important to watch and listen to these valuable parts of yourself as they
come together at their own pace, blending and integrating at a comfortable and useful
way to you. Neither part loses anything, yet retains the usefulness and importance of
both parts. They gain each others best qualities, those lacking in themselves and present
in the other.
You’ll find the changes fascinating…coming together at their own speed and as
comfortably as they can assimilate the changes. When the two images eventually join,
you’ll be surprised by the newly formed single image that dissolves into one and take on
each other’s capacities. Observe the new image closely because the new part represents a
combination of abilities you’ve never had before. You’ll enjoy more skills and abilities,
new ways of accomplishing all of these important outcomes simultaneously…
8) Associate with the new integrated part.
9) Take your time and when the moment presents itself, imagine this part moving
into that place where you feel love and belief, inside your body, where it meshes with you
and all of your many behaviors, easily and readily available. It’s as true for you as the
love you feel for this person, place, or thing. While this is happening, you’ll feel a surge
of energy, internally, as this part reunites with you…take a few moments to appreciate
and enjoy the qualities of this unique new part.
10) Once you’re feeling comfortable think of the specific times and places you
want these integrated qualities and capacities to be fully at your disposal down the line.
The Swish Pattern
This technique takes any unwanted behavior and transforms it into a desire to become
more of the person you want to be. It is useful anytime you want to change unwanted
behaviors or feelings.
1. Visualize a large disassociated picture of yourself - at your very best - the way you
want to look. Imagine the image as a book cover or publicity poster for your latest
blockbuster. Make it as large and colorful as possible. Sweeten it up with sounds and
smells, which make it almost life-like, let your imagination go wild. Store your “very
best you picture” in your brain, front and center.
2. Establish another picture, of the problem or behavior you wish to remove - fingernail
biting, cigarette smoking, anything you want to change or improve. Store this
associated picture - through your eyes as your “cue picture”.
3. File the “cue picture” in front of the “very best you picture.” Put a dot in the center of
the “cue picture” and give it the option to open, similar to a camera shutter. All you
see is the big colorful picture of you at your very best.
Open your eyes.
4. Repeat this process 5-6 times.
5. Test.
Swish Pattern Exercises
1. Have your partner choose a compulsion you wish to remove. Ask them to visualize a
large brightly colored image of the unwanted compulsion. Set it aside for a moment.
2. Then, picture yourself in control of your own destiny, a person who’s achieved their
goals and desires. The visualization must be done with a profound gripping intensity.
Finish it off with a forceful dedicated voice that confirms your need of this future.
3. Turn your attention to the large, bright, unwanted compulsion image and place a
small dark image of your desired state in the lower left-hand corner. Make sure the
large bright picture suddenly gets dark, just as the small dark picture simultaneously
springs up in size to replace it – large, bright and light.
4. Very quickly, you must repeat this process five times in succession and make the
“swish” sound each time. After you complete each process, briefly open your eyes.
5. Place the image of the unwanted compulsion on a rubber band and push it out
towards the horizon. When it’s almost imperceptible create a tiny image of how you
want to be. Begin in the center of the compulsion then release the rubber band and it
don’t be surprised when it “snaps back” – in your face.
6. This is your opportunity to make the unwanted compulsion image affect you, yet,
again in the most negative way.
Computer Swish
1. Imagine the problem – see it through your eyes VAK.

2. Imagine the ideal you – that is someone that would never have this problem. The
ideal you – looking, acting, being – way beyond the problem.
3. Imagine a computer screen – see the problem. Imagine the mouse in your hand.
Notice the icon.
4. Double-click and watch the problem disappear, instantly replaced with the ideal
you.
5. Repeat 5 times. Your problem should have trouble coming back.
6. Drag the problem to the trash folder – dump it in a bin that contains all the things
you never want to do – again!
This is an incredible way to track your brain’s speed. FAST. Open the file, think
about rewriting programs and watch the system run differently - more efficiently.
Chapter 10
Godiva Chocolate Pattern
Richard Bandler
1) Create an associated intense picture of something you are compelled to do, you
love, etc. Get cues.
Anchor. (Anchor #1)
2) Break state.
3) Create a picture of something you need to do - bills, paperwork, taxes – but find it
easier to procrastinate.
Dissociated – watch yourself perform these actions.)
Anchor. (Anchor #2)
4) Bring up the picture from step 1. Fire and hold Anchor #1.
As the person fades the image, bring up picture #2. Fire Anchor #2.
5) Hold both anchors simultaneously.
6) TEST
New Behavior Generator
1. Choose someone you want to emulate, who has the skills and abilities you desire.
2. Watch a movie of this person performing all the things you’d like to accomplish.
3. Watch the movie again. Be sure to notice all the nuances, make sure you understand
how comfortable they are at this moment.
4. Take in this person’s life force. Notice the color, vibration, and sound. Notice how it
gives them that special something. You’ll realize the more we give this away the
more we have.
5. Watch the movie again and put yourself in the starring role. Repeat the actions you
witnessed, but do it with your essence.
6. Watch yourself a second time. Noticing the nuances and see how comfortable you are
this time. Absorb the life force.
7. Walk inside the movie. See, hear, and feel everything as you replay the scene, but
make it your own.
Cue yourself – watch as these talents and abilities emerge.
NLP Handshake Interrupt (Instant) Induction
From Milton Erikson and Dave Elman
1) Reach out as if to shake hands.
2) Clasp your client’s wrist, turn their palm inward, and bring it to eye level.
3) Point to your client’s palm and tell him/her to focus and stare at his/her hand.
4) Ask your client to relax, to focus on his/her palm. Your client should start feeling
drowsy. His/her eyes are really tired.
5) Now tell your client to close their eyes, but remain focused on their hand.
6) You must let go of the client’s hand while you tell them to lower their arm as fast
or as slow as they comfortably can.
7) Use the More The More technique: The more you find yourself wondering what is
going on; the more you find yourself deeply relaxing. The more you try to remain
alert; the more you relax and let go.
8) Push down your client’s arm and repeat the above step.
9) Implant suggestion and instill the ability to return to the trance state.
10) Wake your client while you shake their hand.
Re-Parenting
1. Identify Problem State. Ask your client, "Think of a time when your parent(s)
did not make the best choice in your life. It’s something that’s affected you ever
since.”
2. Access and ANCHOR Problem State. You keep it going and ask, "When you
think of this now, do you feel bad?" ANCHOR the state with your touch.
ANCHOR #1
3. Identify Resource. Continue your probe with, "What resource - courage, humor,
compassion, etc. - do you now have that you wish your parents had back then?
4. Think of a time you had a lot of this resource. ANCHOR #2
5. Integration. "Put this particular resource (fire ANCHOR #2) back into your
client’s memory (fire ANCHOR #1). You’ll discover what happens with this
resource available to you and your client’s parents." Pay attention as you recall
the old memory with new eyes. Pace yourself, then return…
6. Test. Ask your client about that memory, "What difference do you notice, now?"
You should watch for the non-verbal responses.
How to Mend a Broken Heart
By Steve G. Jones
I’ve received a lot of calls from people who want tips on how to help others
suffering from failed relationships. It’s hard to let go of a negative relationship. Our
conscious mind can’t override these intense feelings. It’s even more painful during
holidays or anniversaries. When I have a client struggling with a broken heart, I use a
version of the fear technique, which I’ve spiced up - Mending A Broken Heart Process.
This is for every kind of relationship – lovers, friends, even losing your job. When
you lose your job, you undergo more of these grieving/loss feelings than any of us
realize.
How can we help ourselves and each other? Use the tools we’ve learned to speed
up the natural process of grief and loss. Get the person to think of someone they were
crazy about once upon a time, long ago. Get them to see the bad times through rose-
colored glasses and that distant feel-good memory. The feelings are hazy at best, but
gone.
The first time I used this I was pleasantly surprised at how well it worked. A
weight loss client was very down at one of her follow up sessions. I asked what made her
so sad. Her on-off relationship with her boyfriend was finally off. Then, I asked if she
wanted to be rid of this strong attachment to the failed relationship. YES! I walked her
through this process and made a note to follow up on her next visit.
The next time she said, "I felt fine after our session, but a couple of days later he
called and wanted to talk. I told him no. The next day he sent me flowers at work and
called. I wasn’t interested. The following day he showed up at my job with more flowers
and a ring. I thought about it but, nope, I wasn’t getting back on that merry-go-round. It
was strange; this would have worked before, but not now.”
I wanted to know if she would like her attachment for him back? We could install
it. She laughed and shook her head no. The moral: make sure your patient/client wants to
remove the strong feelings.
Here are the steps.
First we must acknowledge the protection process involved:
The part of you that has been protecting you all this time by making you feel bad is
important and valuable. We want to preserve its ability to protect you in future situations.
The purpose of this technique is to refine and improve your brain’s ability to protect you
by updating its information. We will not remove the memories, just the strong emotional
response.
1. With your eyes open or closed, imagine sitting in the middle of a movie theater.
Up on the screen is a black and white snapshot of you!
2. Float out of your body, up into the projection booth and that other you down there
in the orchestra seat watching the black and white photo on the screen. If you
need more protection add some Plexiglas to the hole in the projection booth.
3. Protected in the projection booth, as the other you in the movie theatre watches a
black and white movie of a younger you going through the entire relationship, the
good, the bad, and the ugly from beginning to end. The first meeting to the last
long good-bye. Observe until you are beyond the end of it, when everything was
OK again.
If you are not fully detached, make the screen smaller, pull back so the screen
appears smaller. Drain the color. Make the picture grainier. Stop and start the movie.
When you reach the end, you should be completely detached. End the movie after the
relationship event, with a freeze frame of yourself.
4. Leave the projection booth, slip back into your seat and the present you. Step
inside that freeze photo of the younger you, who’s feeling OK again, at the
movie’s end. This is double dissociation. Re-run the entire movie of that
relationship backwards in full-blown Technicolor. Do it in two seconds or less.
Go all the way back, before the beginning. See, hear, and feel everything
rewinding in those two seconds or less. Make yourself feel better. Add a
soundtrack, circus music might do the trick. Take your imagination one step
further, add hair and make-up --- visualize your ex-partner with a clown nose,
droopy eyes, wild hair, oversized shoes and feet. Turn that partner into the clown
you know him or her to be.
5. Repeat this process 2 to 3 times.
6. Now bring up a collage of all the negative times you had with this person. Be
honest, all the hurts and slights should be present.
7. You should let them fade away…into your past.
8. Now bring up an image of this person, and notice all of the connections you have
with this person. You may notice cords of light, or energy strings. Pay attention to
all the connections. Head to head, heart to heart, sex to sex, spirit to spirit. In
whatever way is right for you, cut these cords. Use a silver sword or special
scissors. Once you cut the cords, reattach them to yourself, and let them reattach
theirs to them. Release them to find their highest good, as you release your self.
You should test the process and attempt to return to the bad feeling state in any way
you can. What if you come face to face with that person now? If you still get a negative
response, repeat steps 1 to 8 exactly. Faster each time, until the phobic response is
history. Thank your higher self for helping and get on with your life.
6-Step Reframing Outline
1. Organize yes/no signals with the subconscious.
2. Distinguish a pattern of behavior you want to change. Talk to the subconscious

part or X-factor behavior you want to change. Thank it for the good job and give it
a sign, let it know that you know it has a positive intention in causing the behavior.
3. Organize yes/no signals with the subconscious.
Distinguish a pattern of behavior you want to change

a. Raise your index finger when you ask your subconscious mind to give you yes or
no signals. The right index finger - yes and the left index finger for no. Thank it
once the signals are known.
b. You want to know/ask: When X occurs do you want the conscious mind to
comprehend the incident? If “yes,” you want to say thank you. Proceed and make
sure to alert it when you’re finished. Then give me the “yes” signal and if no,
continue.
4. Create new alternatives.
a. Ask that part if it’s willing to go into the person’s creative resources and discover
3 new ways to accomplish this positive function other than X. The part is under
no obligation to accept or use these choices, only to find them.
b. Once you get “yes” again, thank the part and tell it to move ahead by giving you a
“yes” signal when there are 3 more new choices.
Evaluate new alternatives.
a. Ask that part to evaluate each choice, whether subconsciously it believes the
choice is at least as immediate, effective and available as X. Each time the part
identifies one that it believes is, have it give you a “yes” signal.
b. If you get less than three, reprocess Step 4 until you’ve got the choices.
5. Select one alternative.
a. Ask the part to choose what it considers the most satisfying and available way to
achieve the positive function? Again, ask it to give you a “yes” signal when the
selection is complete.
b. Ask the subconscious part if it’s willing to try a new alternative in the appropriate
situation. Wait for that “yes” signal.
6. Future-Pace. Propose that the subconscious enter a fantasy, giving the new
behaviors a shot in the appropriate context. Think of it as trying on a new pair of
shoes. Walk around in appropriate situations and get comfortable, see if this new
behavior is a good fit. If it is, how does it affect others? What about side affects?
Are there any dangers? Ask each parts if there are any objections to the new
behavior. Make sure all parts agree and notify you, “yes” it’s working, or “no” it
isn’t. If the answer is “yes,” you’re on your way. If not, recycle to Step 4 and
generate new alternatives.
NLP-Based “Nonverbal” Induction
1) Set the pre-trance state.

Strictly use the same words that assume a deep trance.
With a downward motion, gesture and bring on a deep trance.
Embed the More The More state of mind and bear in mind the more you
resist the more deeply you relax.
2) Signal your client and they’ll open their eyes, which will continue to reinforce the
deep trance state.
3) Put the client’s hand in yours and move it left to right just above eye level. Please
ask the client to follow by holding their head perfectly still.
4) Close your client’s eyes with a downward motion and touch your client if
necessary.
5) Perform the Arm Lock for ten seconds:

a. Lower the client’s arm and pull down.
b. Pull down on the client’s opposite arm. Both arms should be dangling.
c. Press down on the shoulder as the client exhales.
d. Repeat the exercise three to five times.
6) Pull your client’s arm down and let it flop on their lap. Push down on the client’s
forearms.
7) Perform a head roll, if possible.
8) Arm lock – about 5 to 10 seconds.
9) Lower the client’s arm in stages. Then, pull the arm, let it flop into his/her lap.
10) You should check the muscles – are they relaxed and loose? How’s the skin
temperature and the client’s breathing? If everything is working properly, proceed.
11) Repeat the process - as your client exhales, push down on their shoulders.
12) You should give suggestions and/or reinforcements now.
13) Signal your client to open their eyes.
Building Self-Confidence
A Strategy for Responding to Criticism
This technique is a good way to stay resourceful when you’re criticized in any
situation. It enables you to use criticism as feedback, a way to improve your
relationships.
1. See yourself, in front of you. That self is about to learn a new approach to criticism,
while you watch from the outside. Do whatever is necessary to create the detachment
from that self. View that self farther away, in black and white, or behind Plexiglas,
whatever it takes.
2. Watch and listen as that self is criticized and instantly dissociates. There are several
ways that self can dissociate. He/She can surround him/herself with a Plexiglas shield
when he/she is criticized. Or, that self can see the words of criticism printed within a
cartoon balloon or anything else that helps. That self uses one of these methods to keep
feeling neutral or resourceful.
3. Watch as that self makes a slide or movie of the criticizer in action. What does that
person mean? Does that self have enough information to paint a clear detailed picture?
If the answer is “no,” gather more information. If the answer is “yes,” proceed to the
next step.
4. That self must decide on a response. That self, and you, can agree with any part of the
criticism. Or, that self can apologize, “I’ll give it some serious thought,” or “I see things
differently now.”
5. Would that self like to use this valuable criticism to change behavior patterns? If so,
have that self select a new behavior. That self should make the future come alive by
imagining the new behavior in detail. Next, that self can step inside the movie and use the
new behavior, just to get a sense of what it feels like.
6. Since you’ve watched that self go through this entire strategy, is this the right thing for
you? If the answer is “no,” dig deep inside and ask how you can modify the strategy so it
fits like a glove. If the answer is “yes,” continue.
7. Thank that self as a special resource, which helped you learn the new strategy. Pull
that self into you, feel it fill you up so the knowledge is fully integrated with the rest of
you.
Developing Self-Appreciation
Seeing Yourself Through the Eyes of Someone Who Loves You
This technique helps you gain the appreciation for yourself that others have for you. It is
useful for building self-appreciation and confidence.
1. Identify someone who loves you. Or think of someone you’ve done something for
and who, as a result, sincerely appreciates you.
2. Imagine you’re writing your autobiography and glance up to see on the other side of a
glass door, the person who loves or appreciates you.
3. Float your awareness outside the room. Stand next to this special person and view
yourself through the glass door, notating your own observations.
4. Now, enter the body of the person who loves you. See yourself through this person’s
eyes of love and appreciation. Listen carefully and you’ll hear how they love. Take
on this person’s feelings.
5. Once you’ve completed the task, float back into your body, write the qualities and
aspects of yourself you saw and heard as you looked through the eyes of love and
appreciation.
6. Think of possible times and places, both now and in the future, when you’ll want to
re-experience this sense of deep self-appreciation.
Metaphor for Change
I had a friend who was a farmer. Walking past the chicken coop he spotted a very
ugly chicken. He looked at that thing — every time he looked at it, it got bigger and
uglier.
After weeks of looking he realized the ugly chicken was huge, bigger than any of
the others. A friend of the farmer’s noticed this disgusting hunk of feathers, too and said,
“Hey man! That’s not a chicken…that’s an eagle! How did you get an eagle in here?”
Nobody knew. But there it was, pecking corn, acting like – well, a, chicken.
The farmer let the eagle, who thought he was a chicken, grow alongside his only
friends. The eagle felt rather restricted. He was bigger – and more overpowering than all
the feathery creatures in the coop. Slowly, he began to feel very different. Odd-man out,
he tried, with some difficulty to ear the corn but his beak was hooked and different from
the others. Even worse, the taste was disgusting.
His drives and urges were nothing like his coopmates. A mouse scurried by his
enormous beak and disappeared into the woodwork. Annoyed at a missed opportunity to
bite something tasty, the Eagle complained to anyone who would listen, “Don’t you ever
just want to get one of those, rip it apart and eat it?” Freaked out, upset and angry at his
murderous words, the chickens cried out, “You’re nothing but a carnivore!” A talk with
one of the older chickens got the oversized outsider nowhere --- fast. Too late to make
amends.
The Farmer sensed his sensitive chicks were in trouble, but how to solve the
problem was a lot tougher than he wanted to admit. The chickens were restless. He had to
do something. He stuck the eagle up in the hayloft and left him there in his new perch,
which, shock of all shocks, the eagle liked. The view, perfection! Roomy and spacious,
with a killer view – rabbits, birds, squirrels --- getting on with the business of living, but
impossible to grab.
Aside from the surprising loneliness, the eagle was starving. He longed for
something, anything, even corn. Finally, needs were becoming more important than
desire. Since he thought he was a chicken, he couldn’t fly. But that need to eat was so
powerful he decided to go for it. He was going to take a leap of faith, jump off his perch,
hit the ground, he hoped in one piece, and find something to devour.
Closed eyes and one deep breath later, the eagle took off, nothing beneath his feet,
but air. He wasn’t falling. Much to his surprise he was gliding. His wings spread
naturally, as if he’d been doing this all his young life. A slight breeze gave him the tail
wind he didn’t know he needed. Afraid to look around, the eagle forgot about his hunger
and cracked open one eye, then the other. Scared, his voluntary muscles kept flapping
the wings. Two hundred feet up, he was airborne. How could this be? Everyone knows
chickens can’t fly! But eagles can. They soar.
Even though he had no idea what he was doing, the unwitting eagle followed his
instincts. He discovered a whole new him. If he flapped his wings, he rose like a
phoenix, even if he didn’t know what a phoenix was. If he tilted his wings he banked left
and right. And, all by doing what comes naturally.
He’s free for the first time in his life and he likes it. Watch out world! Watch out
rabbits. He swoops down and gulps the poor defenseless creature before he has a chance
to make it down the rabbit hole. It’s the best meal he’s ever had. Who needs corn? But
pangs of guilt overcame him. This isn’t what chickens do. He’s no carnivore. At least
that’s what he thought. One large circle around the barnyard and the chickens ran for
cover. Once they figured out who he was, they came out of hiding and ignored him the
way they always did. This was much too confusing for the young pilot. He needed
advice and found it with his old friend and mentor, Mr. Rooster.
Mr. Rooster, a sage full of age reminded his young friend that he was different
and that was just fine --- not good, not bad --- just different.
“You look different, you act different,” Mr. Rooster crowed, “Sometimes it takes
more courage to fly the coop, than it does to stay. Change is never easy, my friend.”
The eagle took off, thinking long and hard about the aged sages advice. He
almost bumped into another low-flying object who wasn’t paying attention to what was
coming his way. It was a hawk. Terrified because eagles prey on hawks, he tried to zoom
out of sight, but the young eagle was too fast. The hawk thought he was done for, but the
eagle wanted to talk. “I’m just a big chicken flying around here. Why are you afraid of
me?”
The hawk said, “Chicken? What are you talking about? You are an eagle, king of
the sky!”
The eagle said, “But I live on the ground.”
The hawk answered, “No, you don’t. You are supposed to live in the trees.”
Somebody had to point it out.
Too much information for his young brain, the eagle needed a place to think and
found a nice big comfy tree with long powerful branches. Mother Nature, his newfound
ally, helped him learn how to hunt, dive, fish. Then something came at him, something
just like himself. A girl eagle made his feathers quiver. Someone he can talk to.
Someone who understands him, he hoped. It didn’t take long for two lonely souls to
become soul mates. He took her to his old stomping ground in the barnyard, “It’s
interesting down here! But I really don’t like the smell. I don’t like the people, either!
Other than that I guess it’s all right.”
She introduced him to her friends who never made fun of the eagle who thought
he was a chicken. His unique point of view brought a different perspective to the birds
that had more pride than prejudice. He bridged two worlds and finally climbed the ranks
of the noble world he was destined to join, with the girl he loved in a nest built for two…
Appendix A: The Meta-Model
The meta-model, a concise set of linguistic information gathering tools has been
designed to reconnect a person’s language to the experience that is represented by their
language.
Essential to the useful application of this material is the concept that language is not
experience, but rather a representation of experience. And, this idea is a healthy way of
looking at the people who support and aide people in altering, not completely changing
their lives. It’s the interaction between internal and external experience. Since we
construct buildings with blueprints of what came before, we build upon life changes with
the same sort of knowledge --- tools provided by the meta-model is priceless. The meta-
model connects or crosses lines or intersects language and experience.
Three Universal Modeling Processes
Our world and how we gauge the overwhelming information highway bearing down
on us, comes through our five senses. Combined with our brains, they sculpt the models
we use to guide our behavior. We need them to make sense of what came before, so we
can move ahead with the now, in a better and healthier fashion. Nothing is judged as
good, bad, healthy, sick, or crazy – only possibilities to cope effectively and respond
imaginatively to our environment.
In order to be a valuable therapist, it’s imperative to comprehend the patient/client’s
sense of the world. Each patient’s behavior, no matter how complex or strange is only
seen in the context of the choices, or lack of choices they design or sculpt out for
themselves. It’s not that they’re choices are wrong. Perhaps, they don’t have enough
choices available to successfully confront a problem.
We all try to make the best choices we can with the information available at any
given moment. So many of us have adopted models lacking in useful choices, proven by
the difficult and endless conflicts handed down from generation to generation. “It is not
the world that lacks choices but the individual’s model of the world,” say Grinder and
Bandler.
Our models come through three universal processes: generalization, deletion, and
distortion. Through them we discover how to survive, grow, learn, understand, and
experience the richness the world has to offer. If we mistake our subjective reality for
reality, these same processes limit us, smother any chance we have of flexibility.
Generalization: Method we use or develop during our original, and often forgotten,
experiences. Our roles work for us because we’ve learned to generalize. If a youngster
learns to open a door by turning the knob, the child transfers this experience to other
types of activities that closely resemble the same process. If you walk into a pitch-black
room your first instinct is to feel around for the light switch. Once you’ve learned how to
operate the system, create light, you do it.
This can also be limiting. If a man fails sexually in a way that he believes successful,
then generalizes that moment and resolves that sex isn’t his thing, he woefully denies
himself pleasure, love and intimacy. If a woman stubbornly comes to a decision that all
men are insensitive based on very limited and selective experiences, like the man whose
given up sex, she misses out on some of life’s greatest joys.
We all make too many generalizations based on what works or doesn’t work in any
given situation. If a child understands, from a very early age, that crying and whining gets
him whatever he wants, the child will manipulate his family and friends, until someone
gets wise and refuses him. It feels like abuse, when it’s really just no. If the child
generalizes only the former behavior and not the latter, he may not be able to generate
more appropriate and useful behavior in the company of his peers. If a young man
generalizes only those behaviors that are useful among fellow males, he may experience
great difficulty in obtaining respect and interest from women. Whether or not a
generalization is useful must be evaluated in the particular context.
Deletion: Another method that helps us cope in a healthy and successful manner,
and provides limits we must maintain. Like the delete button on a computer, which helps
us quickly lose what we don’t want, deletions work only when we selectively pay
attention to certain aspects of our experience and exclude others. We can zero in on
certain portions or experiences above all others. Some people can read a book while
people chat and fuss all around them. They can delete that noise as easily as blaring TV
or stereo. Tuning out helps us cope with too much external stimuli.
Even though, it’s limiting, we need to delete portions of our experiences so we can
obtain what seems important and necessary in our lives. Teenagers who play the pity
card, carrying on that they are the only ones picked on, or that whatever the issue it’s
only happening to them, has yet to develop a useful model of the world. If a therapist
drops out for a moment or two during a session, he or she foregoes all sensory
information and limits his or her own experience as well as that of his client.
Distortion: The third process permits us to shift sensory information. It gives us
license to make plans for the future or turn dreams into reality. Fiction, art, and even
science give us a wide berth to interpret or misinterpret what we see or perceive.
Authors, painters and scientists craft their own reality, while reconstructing or distorting
established world-views, which can be changed through a brush stroke or a word. There
are countless ways we limit ourselves through distortion.
When someone distorts all criticism with, "I'm unlovable,” any and all value in the
criticism is lost – along with the chance to grow and change. If the process of relating is
disassociated from “relationship,” the parties involved suffer a loss. The relationship
becomes amorphous, out there, out of control. It’s no longer unique.
Since these three universal modeling processes are expressed in language patterns,
we utilize a set of linguistic tools known as the meta-model to challenge them when they
limit rather than expand a person's behavioral choices.
The meta-model teaches the listener how to hear and respond to another person who
wants to communicate with them. Content can fluctuate substantially, but the form of the
information gives the listener the chance to respond and obtain the fullest meaning from
the communication. The meta-model provides us with the tools to quickly discern the
richness and the limits of the information given, in addition to the human modeling
processes used by the speaker. If we listen and respond with meta-model distinctions, we
create infinite ways of understanding and learning from any specific communication.
The meta-model distinctions fall into three natural groupings:
Gathering Information
Limits of the Speaker's Model
Semantic Ill-formedness
Gathering information: We gain an accurate and full description of the content

through appropriate questions and responses. The process aids in re-establishing the
speaker's language with his or her experience. There are four sub-distinctions in this
category.
Deletion (About Whom or What?)
Lack of Referential Index (Who or What?)
Unspecified Verbs (How?)
Nominalizations (Thing or Event rephrased as a Process)
Deletion: The ability to recognize when a deletion occurs and, then, recovering the
deleted information aids in restoring a fuller representation of the experience. When
recovering missing material, the meta-modeler questions: ABOUT WHOM? ABOUT
WHAT?
“I don't get it.”

(Response) “You don't get what?”
(Or) “What don’t you get?”
“I'm frightened.”
(Response) “What or whom are you frightened of?”
“I don't like the book.”

(Response) “What about the book, don't you like?”
“He's incredible.”
(Response) “Why is he incredible?”
“He’s an incredible friend.”

(Response) “He’s an incredible amongst whom?”
(Or) “Between whom?”
With deletions, ask, “How, specifically?” will elicit information concerning the
representational system used by the client.
“I don't get it.”

(Response) “How, specifically, do you know you don’t get it?”
“It's just not that simple to me.” (i.e., visual representation)
Lack of Referential Index: A type of generalization, which limits a person's model

of the world by omitting the detail and richness necessary to have a variety of options for
coping. We can take an experience and generalize it so that it's totally out of perspective
or proportion. Challenge a lack of referential index and question: WHO
SPECIFICALLY? WHAT SPECIFICALLY?
“No one’s interested in me.”

(Response) “Who, specifically, isn’t interested in you?”
“They are pigheaded.”

(Response) "Who, specifically, is pigheaded?”
"This is difficult.”
(Response) “What, specifically, about this is difficult for you?”
Unspecified Verbs leave us in the dark when it comes to description. Verbs are
relatively vague. "Kiss" is much more specific than “touch.” When someone’s hurt, it
can be physical - a gunshot wound, or emotional - a nasty look or callous word from a
loved one. Verb specification reunites the person more fully to their experience. To
challenge unspecified verbs, ask: HOW SPECIFICALLY?
“He doesn’t want me.”

(response) “How, specifically, doesn’t want you?”
“They overlooked me.”

(response) "How, specifically, did they overlook you?'
“The children push me to discipline them.”

(response) "How, specifically, do the children push you to discipline them?"
Nominalizations: Words transformed from verbs, or process words, into nouns –

which turns an ongoing process into a thing or an event. When this happens, choices
disappear and must be hooked up with the ongoing, dynamic process of life. Reversing
nominalizations help a person see that what they had considered an event – over and
beyond their control – is, in fact, a continuing process that can be changed.
Nominalizations are distinguished from regular nouns in several ways.
Visualization: picture a wheelbarrow. Fill it up with a chair, cat and last but not least,
your mother. What would happen if you tried to put failure, virtue, projections, and
confusion into that same wheelbarrow? Nominalizations are not persons, places, or
things tossed into that wheelbarrow. Another way to test for nominalizations is to check
whether the event word fits into a syntactic frame. If yes, it’s a nominalization.
an ongoing problem (nominalization)
an ongoing elephant
an ongoing chair
an ongoing relationship (nominalization)
To transform a nominalization back into a process word, use it as a verb in the

response:
“I don't get any acknowledgment.”

(Response) “How would you like to be acknowledged?”
“Concentrate.”
(Response) “What do you want me to concentrate on?”
“I regret my choice.”
(Response) “Does anything stop you from choosing again?”
“I want assistance.”
(Response) “How do you want to be assisted?”
Another group of meta-model distinctions are called limits of the speaker's model.
They identify unsupported generalizations or restrictions in a person’s thinking and you
can sustain a person and enrich their model of the world by expanding it. Two
distinctions in this category:
Universal Quantifiers (All or nothing thinking)
Modal Operators (Must and can’t thinking)
Universal Quantifiers: Words like ALL, EVERY, ALWAYS, NEVER and

NOBODY fall into this category. Highlight the generalization described by the speaker's
universal quantifiers, exaggerate it – through voice quality or insert additional universal
quantifiers, which serves to challenge them, assists in finding the exception to their
generalization and helps the quantifiers identify more choices. You can also ask whether
the speaker has had an experience that contradicts his or her own generalization.
“I never get anything right.”

(Response) “You absolutely never ever get anything right?”
(Or) “Have you ever gotten anything right?”
“You're always yelling at me."

(Response) “I'm always yelling at you?”
“It's impossible to do what’s necessary.”

(Response) “Have you ever done what’s necessary?”
Modal Operators of Necessity indicates a lack of choice: HAVE TO, MUST,

CAN’T, IT’S NECESSARY. Challenging these modal operators pushes a person beyond
the limits they’ve accepted. Two superb answers that challenge the limits are: WHAT
STOPS YOU? WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF YOU DID?
The reply, “What stops you?” takes the person back to the past where they discover
the experience from which this generalization was formed. “What would happen if you
did?” demands that the client head to the future and imagine possible consequences.
These responses help someone achieve a richer and fuller model of the world.
“I can’t work that out.”

(Response) “What stops you?”
“You have to find the answers today by Tuesday.”
(Response) “What would happen if I don’t?”
“I have to bake six dozen cookies.”

(Response) “What will happen if you don’t?”
“I can’t say I’m sorry one more time.”

(Response) “What will happen if you do?”
(Or) “What stops you from trying one more time?”
The third group of distinctions: semantic ill-formedness. The significance of

recognizing sentences based on unsubstantiated responsibility, assumptions or judgments
allows you to help the person in identifying the portions of their model that are distorted
in some way. Once the speaker is responsive to those portions of their model based on
unsubstantiated beliefs rather than fact, it gives them greater choice and freedom. These
ill-formed portions frequently stop the person from acting in ways they would otherwise
choose to act. The three classes of semantic ill-formedness are:
Cause and Effect (Perceived responsibility)
Mind Reading (Assumptions)
Lost Performative (Judgements)
Cause and Effect: An action on the part of one person causes another person to
behave in a particular way or to experience some emotion or inner state. When a person
believes there are no choices on how to respond to the challenge, it permits them to
explore and question their cause-effect connection. And they can speculate on other
possible responses to choose from. The challenge: HOW DOES X CAUSE Y?
“Your drawings make me uncomfortable.”

(Response) "How do my drawings make you uncomfortable?”
(Or) "...make you feel uneasy?”
“You annoy me.”

(Response) “How do I annoy you? How is it possible that I annoy you?”
(Or) “ ... make you feel aggravated?”
“I'm angry because you're never on time.”

(Response) “How does my being late make you angry?”
Mind Reading: The speaker’s belief that one person knows what another person
thinks or feels without direct communication from the second person. If the speaker acts
on assumptions rather than information mind reading can do much to inhibit the
usefulness of a person's model of the world. The challenge to mind reading: HOW
SPECIFICALLY, DO YOU KNOW X? The challenge helps the speaker become aware
of, and even to question, those assumptions he or she may have previously taken for
granted.
“Most people believe I’m much too slow.”

(Response) “How, specifically, do you believe that most people think you’re too
slow?”
“I bet you understand what I’m going through.”

(Response) “How, specifically, do you know I understand what you’re going
through?”
“I get what his day is like.”

(Response) “How, specifically, do you get what his day is like?”
“In no way does he think about the cost of what he’s doing.”
(Response) “How, specifically, do you know he doesn’t think about the cost of what
he’?”
Lost Performative refers to statements made in the form of a generalization about
the world rather than recognized as part of the speaker’s model of the world. Usually,
they are judgments. The speaker uses a lost performative when applying “rules” from his
model of the world on others. Called laying your trip on somebody else, the purpose of
this challenge enables the speaker to have his own rules and opinions, while content to let
others own theirs. Sometimes with the use of the lost performative, the speaker may not
be aware of other options or possibilities. To challenge it, ask FOR WHOM?
“It’s wrong to jaywalk.”

(Response) “It’s wrong for whom to jaywalk?”
“This is the best route to take.”

(Response) “This is the best route to take for whom?”
“That’s a ridiculous thing to do.”

(Response) “Ridiculous for whom?”
The meta-model is simply a set of tools that establishes better communication, which
helps and expects your client to communicate more clearly: Asking what, how, and who
in response to the specific form of the client’s language. Your skills as a meta-modeler
depend on your willingness and ability to implement the questions and the responses
provided by the meta-model.
When you implement the meta-model, pay careful attention to your internal
processes. A formalization of intuitive behavior, you can turn to meta-model responses
rather than refer to your own internally generated experience to understand a client’s
communication. When a client declares, "My father hurt me," you must ask, “How?” if
you want to fully comprehend what the surprising statement means. Should the client
have suffered physical or verbal attacks, or was just plain invisible, you must probe to
find out the meaning behind the word “hurt.” However, if you understand what is meant
by the word "hurt" by simply calling on your own experience, then you are, in fact,
meeting the client at your model for the world, not his.
The meta-model permits you to remain attuned to your client’s perception of the
world instead of slipping into your own subjective experience for understanding. You
can easily insert the appropriate meta-model responses at those points where you
previously would have had to refer to your own internal experience to understand or
attempt to understand your client's meaning.
Suppose a client says, “I'm afraid of crowds.” If you go with, “Oh yeah, afraid of
crowds, yes, I know about that,” then you’ve bypassed an important opportunity to
further connect the client on his level. If you use the responses provided by the meta-
model – “How do you know you are afraid of crowds? What frightens you about crowds?
“What keeps you from being comfortable in crowds?” – you’ll be able to keep up with
your client’s experience and help them generate answers and new possibilities for growth
from his or her own resources. These resources might be ones you have yet to develop.
Once you discover these points you’ll experience and understand a given
communication. The meta-model questions will definitely boost your value as a therapist
and facilitate the integration of the meta-model internally as part of your automatic
unconscious behavior. Get a friend to produce sentences that contain a meta-model
violation. With each one, determine how your intuitions express themselves.
If someone says, "My feelings were hurt," form a mental picture and you’ll figure
out how they were hurt, how and by whom? If you remember visually, kinesthetically or
auditorally a time when your own feelings were hurt, than you "understand" the
experience from your point of view, not the client’s. Once you’re aware of your own
internal processes, you’ll learn to hold onto the signals that push you inside yourself
instead of staying in the present. Once you’ve identified your own signal, you’ll
automatically insert the meta-model responses instead of your own internalizations. Each
time an internal bell goes off, alerting you that something is missing or doesn't make
sense, you’ll know that a meta-model response is both constructive and suitable.
Practically speaking, the meta-model is rooted in human intuition. If you learn, and
trust, those intuitions, the meta-model is a speedy and straightforward process. Expressed
in any representational system, the intuitions are – visual, auditory, kinesthetic. If
someone says, “The King himself,” your intuition tells you something was left out. The
picture needs more color. If you represent kinesthetically, you don't know what the king
did. Neither of these representations is complete until you know the answer to "the King
did what?" No matter how your intuitions express themselves, insert the meta-model
question now and you’ll extract the fullest possible meaning from the communication.
To utilize these intuitions in teaching the meta-model distinctions: (1) generate
sentences that contain one pattern of meta-model violation; (2) ask the learner what his
experience is; (3) once you’ve determined how the learner’s intuitions express
themselves concerning this pattern, reverse the process and make them ask the
appropriate meta-model question – make it an integral portion of the expression of those
same intuitions. If the learner has an incomplete picture, he’ll ask for more information.
If he’s puzzled, slip in the best possible question which will help him put the piece in
place. If it’s odd or out of tune, insert question that will harmonize the chords and strip
away the dissonant ones. Alter the statements and the content with the meta-model
violation and the repetition necessary to integrate the meta-model question with the
intuition should remain stimulating.
Intuitions will vary within a person for the various patterns. A feeling for universal
quantifier might be present as well as a picture for nominalizations and a sound for cause
and effect. Each person has a unique set, yet each person falls into consistent patterns.
Once the patterns are established, these exercises can help further integrate them into
everyday behavior.
Make sure to learn or teach the three meta-model categories outlined in the
appendix: Gathering Information, Limits of the Speaker’s Model and Semantic Ill-
formedness. You, or the student, will appropriately organize the meta-model for easy and
full integration and conscious and unconscious processes.
Meta-Model Outline Summary:
A. Gathering Information
1. Deletion
2. Lack of Referential Index
3. Unspecified Verbs
4. Nominalizations
B. Limits of the speaker’s model

5. Universal Quantifiers
6. Modal Operators
C. Semantic Ill-formedness
7. Cause and Effect
8. Mind Reading
9. Lost Perfomative
APPENDIX B: Timelines
Controlling your Perception of Time
What can I give to you, therapists, that will help you immediately, that will enable
you to be more effective in every area of your lives? Give you an internal edge? In early
August while preparing for the NGH Convention, I got it. I needed help! I thought of a
statement I heard at my NLP Master Trainers Training.
Controlling our internal time clocks is one of the most beneficial things we can learn.
When I was preparing for the convention, time was closing in on me – maintaining my
clients’ needs, proposing and organizing new business plans, rehearsing my convention
presentation, working on my book, and preserving family ties. I was a mess. Over-
worked, over-stressed and overwhelmed. Suddenly it hit me. I really needed to “hurry up
and slow down”; to reset my internal time clock; to focus on the moment and feel like I
had all the time in the world.
NLP: the study of how people’s brains work. The more I thought about it, the more I
realized that time is a subjective experience. As hypnotists we understand time
distortion, which Milton Erickson used for many client problems, including weight
control. He would have his clients move into “slow time” whenever they ate. This way
they were aware of how much they ate, and allowed themselves to feel full.
Many of us understand the concept of time moving at a snail’s pace vs. time
whizzing by. Language expresses it best: time drags; time flies. If you break down either
experience into tiny chunks, repeat it with consistent results, you’ve hit nirvana – NLP at
its best.
How people function in relation to time is almost as infinite as time itself …I’d like
to share a few of my discoveries:
Things that are physically and mentally fun and challenging naturally speed up the
internal clock. “Time flies when you’re having fun.”
Things that are repetitive or boring seem to go on forever and slow time down.
“This class drags.”
Sporadically, people find themselves in a place where time seems to stop. Everything
around them slows down and they appear to be in total control. Like the perfect shot as
the 4th quarter buzzer rings just as the ball is thrown from the opposite side of the court
swishes through the hoop and your team wins the championship. Other events distort
time: speeding down the freeway at 75mph, then suddenly turning onto the service road
and slowing down to 35. Everything’s moving in slow motion, while you’re at normal
speed. Traumatic events stop time and there’s no accounting for it.
If this were really true, then you could speed up or slow down the process of time.
What about mixing and matching time as you wanted or needed too? Wouldn’t it be nice
if therapy sessions were experienced in slow-motion? Think of how much information
you could cull from your client? Then, there are airplanes. Push the limits of time to the
extreme.
Try this little experiment on for size and see where time takes you:
Giving Yourself More Time – Control Your Internal Clock
1. Find a moment in your life when time moved very slowly and minutes seemed like
hours:
Example: boring class or lecture; traffic jams; waiting for the tardy doctor or bad
news; the dentist’s chair; anxiously waiting for your child, who is two hours late.
2. Select one or two and re-live the experience. Notice everything, about yourself. Don’t
miss a detail. What do you see, hear, smell, feel?
SEE: Is your vision narrow and focused? Broad and open? Is it colorful? Dull
and shades of grey?
HEAR: Are the sounds loud or quiet? Clear? Muffled? Close or far away? Any
internal sounds? Where are the voices?
FEEL: Where is your center? Externally or internally focused? How is your
stomach and chest? Do you feel heavy or light?
SMELL or TASTE: Do you notice anything?
Be as specific as possible. These are your sub-modalities.
3. Clear your mind; break the state.
4. Find a time where time moved very quickly.
Examples: a party is so much fun, it’s over before you know it; a great movie,
where you’re so inside it, you’re not even aware of yourself; a sporting event so close
you can’t leave, even though you know you’ll be stuck in a tremendous traffic jam;
sharing something special with the person you love.
5. Find your sub-modalities for this experience.
6. Compare the differences. Mix and match the experiences, if you can.
Step into “Slow Time,” but with a sense of excitement.
* Try accessing a time in which you used SLOW TIME naturally. Driving down the
freeway at 70mph. Everything moves much more slowly on the surface streets. Did you
just avoid an accident because time seemed to slow down or stop? Step into slow time
and give yourself more time. If you give it a go during a session with a client, you’ll take
in so much more vital information.
Add some background music, whether it’s real or in your mind. Your focus shifts.
Everything’s sharper.
There are two basic types of Timeline:
Through Time – Your timeline never touches you. Your past, present and future
merge in front of you; you can see through time. This type of person is organized, prefers
to plan things in advance and is too busy worrying about the future to be in the moment.
Numbers 1 and 4 above are typical lines of this type.
In Time – Your timeline goes through you at some point per illustrations 2, 3 and 5.
Planning and follow through are a problem, but you live for the moment.
Nothing is written in stone! It’s ever changing and evolving. Remember something
very important that many “timeliners” don’t: we all use different timelines for different
things. People who are the epitome of Through Time at work are the complete opposite
at home. In Time works better for their personal life. Addictions are an In Time
phenomenon. You can’t see past your actions because of your addiction.
As you elicit your client’s timeline for information be sure you get the client to elicit
a timeline for the issues at hand.
APPENDIX C: Dave Elman Induction
We’re coming to the end. At last. Breathe. Take a long deep breath. Hold it for a few
seconds. As you slowly exhale, close your eyes, let go of the surface tension in your
body. Relax. Your whole body. As much as possible…right now.
Take that internal focus and direct it towards your eye muscles. Relax those outer
muscles to the point that they just stop. Make sure those eye muscles are so relaxed, they
won’t work. Hold on to the relaxation. Test them to make sure THEY WON’T WORK.
Channel this quiet, this perfect relaxation, throughout your entire body. Let this state
of nirvana flow from the top of your head, to the tips of your toes.
Let’s deepen this relaxation even more. In a moment, you will open and close your
eyes. When you close your eyes, dig even deeper, 10 times deeper, to that quiet part of
yourself for a more tranquil feeling. Simply let it happen because you want it and need it.
Let nature take its course. Ok open your eyes again…now close your eyes and feel that
relaxation flow through your entire body, taking you much deeper. Use your limitless
imagination and envision your whole body…covered and wrapped in a warm blanket of
relaxation.
Now, we deepen this relaxation much more. In a moment, you’re going to open and
close your eyes one more time. Again, when you close your eyes, double the relaxation
you now have. Make it twice as deep. All right, now once more, open your eyes…close
your eyes and double your relaxation…good. Let every muscle in your body go limp. As
long as you hold on to this quality of relaxation, no muscle in your body will work.
In a moment, I’m going to have you open and close your eyes one more time. Again,
when you close your eyes, double the relaxation you now have…twice as deep. Ok, now,
once more, open your eyes…close your eyes and double your relaxation…good. Let go.
Let every muscle in your body become so relaxed that as long as you hold on to this
quality of relaxation, every muscle in your body will is quietly resting.
In a moment, I’m going to lift your hand by the wrist, just a few inches, and drop it. If
you have followed my instructions up to this point that hand will be so relaxed it will be
just as loose and limp as a wet dish cloth and will simply plop down. Don’t try to help
me. You have to remove relaxation. Let me do all the lifting so that when I release it, it
just plops down and you’ll permit yourself to go much deeper.
If the subject helps to lift the hand, say, “No, no let me do all the lifting. Don’t help me.
Let it be heavy. Don’t help me. You’ll feel it when you have it.
Now that’s complete physical relaxation. There are two ways a person can relax…
physically… and…mentally. You’ve already proved you can relax physically, now let
me show you how to relax mentally. In a moment I’ll ask you to begin slowly counting
backwards, out loud, from 100. Now, here’s the secret to mental relaxation. With each
number you say, double your mental relaxation. With each number you say, let your
mind become twice as relaxed. Now if you do this, by the time you reach the number 98,
or maybe even sooner, your mind will be so relaxed, you will have actually cleared the
numbers that come after 98, right out of your mind. There won’t be any more numbers.
Now you have to do this. I can’t do it for you. Those numbers will leave if you will
them away. Now start with the idea that you will make that happen and you can easily
dispel them from your mind.
Hypnotist: Now, say the first number, 100, and double your mental relaxation.
Client: 100
Hypnotist: Now double that mental relaxation. Let those numbers start to fade.
Client: 99
Hypnotist: Double your mental relaxation. Start to make those numbers leave.
They’ll go if you will them away.
Client: 98
Hypnotist: Now, they’ll be gone. Dispel them. Banish them. Make it happen.
You can do it. I can’t do it for you. Push them out. Make it happen! ARE
THEY ALL GONE?
APPENDIX D: Reframing
Reframing should be one of the most powerful tools you have to open up new levels of
communication. Or it can make you seem like a pushy manipulator, someone who uses
word games to swindle people. One of the bad raps about NLP comes from the misuse of
reframing.
What is reframing? A way to use language to reset in someone’s mind an event, belief, or
feeling. An opportunity to see, hear or feel differently about it. When you change the
frame of reference, you are reframing as NLP likes to call it. The purpose: Reframing
helps a person experience their actions, the impact of their beliefs, behaviors, and feelings
from a different perspective or frame and potentially become more resourceful; react with
more choices than before.
An event, belief, feeling, has no meaning on its own. It just is. People give it meaning
according to their beliefs, values, preoccupations, like and dislikes.
During the 1984 presidential campaign, there was considerable concern about Ronald
Reagan’s age. During the debate with Walter Mondale, Reagan said, “I will not make age
an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit for political purposes, my opponent’s
youth and inexperience.” Reagan’s age was not an issue for the remainder of the
campaign!
Reframing changes the way you perceive an event, the way you make others perceive an
event, and more than anything reframing the context of the moment. That moment
changes the meaning of everything from that moment on. As the meaning changes, so
does response and behavior.
Five important points are imperative, if reframing proves to be effective. They’re often
over looked by NLP people, because there’s just way too much focus on technique and
not enough on the “Big Five”.
1. RAPPORT: You must be in Rapport or your reframe will come across as

interference or pushiness.
2. Understand how the techniques work: Not just theory, but on a deep, deep level;
what’s happening in your targets and your mind.
3. Correct information: A reframe or readjustment before you have all the
information leads to technique interrupt us, which will make you look impudent.
4. Permission to offer it.
5. Reframes are natural if done right.
Then and only then, will reframe do what it is supposed to do. Now here is the big secret
to reframing: it’s not a complete technique on its own! Yep, I said it. It will, not in and
of itself, produce a complete change in someone. (Stories where a one line reframe totally
shifted a person are almost impossible to believe.)
Reframe techniques are solely meant to “open the doorway” to a person’s mind. A
glimpse of other possibilities leads you towards this momentary opening with your
rapport skills and correct information you can lead the client in a whole new direction.
Bottom line, the meaning of an experience is dependent on the context, or on the content.
One of the great reframes of all times comes from Thomas Edison. It’s still used today,
to reframe the idea of failure. When it was pointed out that it took 1000 (or 10,000
according to the story and the storyteller) tries to successfully get the electric light bulb to
work, a reporter asked Edison how he felt about the 1000 failures. Edison replied, “We
did not fail, we found 1000 ways that did not work.”
Of course, in NLP and hypnosis we often quote Milton Erickson. When asked about his
failures with clients, he reframed it as, “There is no failure, only feedback. Always be
willing to try something else.”
A young worker made a mistake that lost IBM $1 million in business. Summoned to the
President’s office she said, “Well, I guess you’ve called me here to fire me.” “Fire you?”
the president replied, “Why would I fire you? I just spent $1 M on your education! That
is an MBA in real world experience.”
There are two types of reframing:
Context Reframing
Almost all behaviors are useful in some context. A context reframe can be used to see
that the behavior itself can be useful. In what context does this behavior have value?
Content Reframing
The meaning or content of any situation is determined by what you choose to focus on.
This will give it meaning to you and by reframing, it changes its meaning.
What else could this mean and what is the positive value in this behavior? The positive
value could be related to the targets behavior (as above) or it could be related to your
target’s behavior. A possible reframe: “Isn’t it great you know your boundaries and are
not prepared to allow someone to violate them?”
Reframing is going on all around us. Politicians are masters at it. A positive spin is little
more than reframing. Listen to a conservative talk show, then switch to a liberal (if you
can find one) and listen to the same story.
Glossary of Common NLP Terms
Accessing cues – Behaviors that are used to relate to a representational system; i.e. eye
movements, postures, breathing, etc.
Analog change – A change that varies continuously; e.g. a shift in body position.
Analog marking – Putting emphasis on a specific part of a sentence utilizing verbal or

non-verbal means; e.g. a louder tone, a hand gesture, or italics in a document.
Anchor – A trigger that leads to an all-encompassing sensory experience.
Auditory – Sense of hearing.
Backtrack – To review what you have already learned.
Break state – To make a major change in a person’s state.
Behavioral flexibility – The ability to change someone’s behavior, which elicits a

behavioral response from someone else.
Calibrate – To “read” another person’s verbal and non-verbal cues and associate specific
behaviors with specific internal processes or states.
Calibrated loop – An ongoing interaction between two or more people, in which specific
behaviors of each person triggers specific responses in each other.
Chaining anchors – Firing anchors in a specific sequence in order to direct a person’s

experience along that pattern.
Channel – One of the five senses or representational systems (VAKOG).
Chunk size – The size of the object, situation or experience being considered. It can
change by chunking up (broader focus), chunking down (more specific focus), chunking
sideways or laterally (focusing on others of the same type of class).
Collapsing Anchors – Firing several anchors at once in order to promote integration of

the experiences.
Complex equivalent – A linguistic term used to describe the complex set of behaviors
that pertain to a certain nominalization in a person’s map of reality; e.g. the behaviors
that are “proof” that a certain person “loves” you.
Congruent – When all of a person’s internal strategies, behaviors, processes and parts
are in agreement and working together.
Contrastive analysis – Determines the differences between the sub modalities of two or
more representations.
Conversational Postulates – Behavioral presuppositions, which are implied, but are not
identified overtly; e.g. “Do you have a watch?” leads the other person to tell you the time.
Critical Sub modalities – The sub modalities that determine a person’s response.
Cross-over Mirroring – Matching a person’s rhythms with a different type of behavior.
Digital Change – A change that is all-or-none, on-or-off with no steps or positions in

between the ends.
Dissociated – Experiencing something from a perspective other than your own.
Driver – The most important sub modality. Changing it may result in changes in other
sub modalities.
Dovetail – To fit together many outcomes and stories.
Ecology – Considering the effects on the whole system, not just one part or one person.
Embedded command – Nesting a command, so that it is grammatically not a command,

but it is marked out as a command by your analogs.
Eye accessing cues – Movements of the eyes that indicate a representational system.
Firing an anchor – Repeating a behavior that triggers a certain response.
First position – Experiencing the world from your perspective.
Flexibility – Having more than one choice in a situation or decision.
Future Pace – Rehearsing, both mentally and physically, so that a specific behavior will
occur naturally and automatically in a certain situation.
Generative intervention – An intervention that solves the presenting problem and also
generates other changes that makes the person’s life better.
Gustatory – Sense of taste.
Incongruent – When two or more of a person’s programs are not in alignment.
Installation – Creating a new strategy or behavior within yourself.
Kinesthetic – Sense of feeling.
Lead system – The representational system a person uses to access stored information.
Leading – Guiding someone in a certain direction.
Lost performative – A linguistic pattern in which the person performing the action is
missing from the sentence.
Map of reality – A person’s perception of reality.
Meta-model – A model of language patterns that focuses attention on words people use
to delete, distort, generalize, limit or specify their realities. It provides a series of
outcome-specific questions used for recovering lost information and or loosening rigid
patterns of thinking.
Metaphor – Usually a story that relates one situation, experience or phenomenon to

another.
Meta-outcome – An outcome that is more general than the stated one
Meta-person – Being in third position.
Milton model – A categorization of language patterns useful for delivering a message so

that the person readily accepts it.
Mirroring – Matching one’s behavior to that of another person.
Modal operators – A linguistic term for the way one judges or evaluates actions.
Modality – One of the five senses.
Modeling – Observing how something happens or how someone thinks, and then
demonstrating the process for other people.
Negative command – A command that is stated in the negative and marked out with
analogs.
Nest – To fit one thing (outcome or story) within another.
Nominalization – A linguistic term for the words, which actually have no existence as
things. Examples of nominalizations are “love”, “freedom”, “happiness”, “respect”, etc.
Olfactory – Sense of smell.
Organ language – Words that refer to specific body parts; e.g. “Get off my back,”
Outcome – Desired result.
Pacing – Matching or mirroring another person’s verbal and/or non-verbal behavior.

Helpful in gaining short-term rapport.
Parts – Metaphor for the different areas of a person’s strategies, programs, personality or
ego states; e.g. the “parts” that want you to be safe, independent, in control, loved,
respected, spiritual, etc.
Perceptual filter – A perspective or set of presuppositions about an object, person or

situation. Also called a “mask.”
Polarity response – A response that reverses or takes the opposite position from the
previous statement.
Predicates –Words that express action or relationship with respect to a subject (verbs,
adverbs and adjectives). The words may reflect the representational system being used or
they may be non-specific.
Preferred representational system- The representational system which a person

habitually uses to process information.
Process words – See predicates.
Quotes – A way of expressing a desired message in quotations as if someone else said it.
Rapport – A condition in which trust and cooperation has been established between
people.
Reframing – A process by which a person’s perception of a certain behavior is changed.
Remedial Intervention – An intervention method that solves the presenting problem.
Representational systems – Refers to the five senses: visual, auditory, kinesthetic,

gustatory and olfactory.
Resource state – The experience of an ability, attitude, behavior, characteristic, or

perspective that is useful.
Second position – Experiencing the world from someone else’s perspective.
Secondary gain – The positive or desired result of an undesired behavior.
Sensory acuity – The ability to use the senses to make distinctions between different bits
of incoming information.
Sensory based – Information that is correlated once the five senses have processed it.
Separator state – See break state.
Shift referential index – To take the perspective of someone else, but to keep your own
criteria.
Six-step reframe – A process in which an undesirable behavior is separated from the

desired outcome and can more easily adopt new behaviors that satisfy its positive
intention and do not have the negative effects of the original behavior.
Sorting polarities – Something that pulls a person in opposite directions.
Stacking anchors – Using the same anchor for a number of resources.
State – A condition of body/mind or an experience at a particular moment.
Stealing an anchor – Identifying an anchored pattern and then firing that anchor.
Stimulus-response – The association between an experience and a response.
Strategy – A pattern of mental and behavioral steps, which leads to a specific outcome.
Sub modalities – The subdivisions of the representational systems.
Switch referential index – To take the perspective and the criteria of someone else.
Synthesia – An overlap between representational systems.
Tag questions – Negative questions added to the end of a sentence in order to diffuse
polarity responses.
Tape editing – A process of reviewing past behavior and then future pacing, in order to
make changes to future responses in similar situations.
Third position – Experiencing the world from a distant position.
Transderivational search – The process of searching through past memories to find a

reference experience.
Translating – The process of rephrasing words from one representational system to

another.

References
Meta Publications – Cupertino, CA:
Bandler, Richard; and MacDonald, Will. An Insider’s Guide to Sub-Modalities.

1988
Cameron-Bandler, Leslie. They Lived Happily Ever After. 1978.
Dilts, Robert; and Cameron-Bandler, Leslie. Neuro-Linguistic Programming, vol.
I. 1980.
Farrelly, Frank; and Brandsma, Jeff. Provacative Therapy. 1978.
Richardson, Jerry. The Magic of Rapport. 1987.
Futurepace, Inc – San Rafael, CA:
Cameron-Bandler, Leslie; Gordon, David; and Lebeau, Michael. Know How.

1985.
Cameron-Bandler, Leslie; Gordon, David; and Lebeau, Michael. The Emprint
Method.
1985.
Real People Press – Moab, UT:
Andreas, Steve; and Andreas, Connirae. Change Your Mind -- and Keep the
Change. 1987.
Andreas, Steve; and Andreas, Conirae. Heart of the Mind: engaging your inner
power to change with Neuro-Linguistic Programming. 1989.
Bandler, Richard. Using Your Brain – for a CHANGE. 1989.
Bandler, Richard; and Grinder, John. Frogs into Princes. 1979.
Bandler, Richard; and Grinder, John. Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic
Programming and the Transformation of Meaning. 1982.
Science and Behavior Books – Palo Alto, CA:

Bandler, Richard; and Grinder, John. The Structure of Magic, vols. 1 and 2.
1975 and 1976.

NLP Practitioner Final Exam (Instructions)
Please follow this link to set up your account/login into your account to take
the NLP Practitioner Course exam:
http://www.mycertificates.org/Login.aspx
Enter your email address and use your private code: nlpprac-47

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Table of Contents

Q. What’s a quick definition of NLP?

Q. Where does the name come from?

AANLP uses PSYCHOLOGY rather than Programming because Psychology

Q. How does NLP work?

Q. What can I expect, in terms of an end result?

Q. How would you classify NLP?

Groups of three, Programmer chooses a situation:

4. Go over everything the client said.

SPEND A COUPLE OF MINUTES DOING THIS, THEN:

Mismatch as many words, processes, and questions you can.

Opening Your Senses

1) Kinesthetic (sense of touch) -

Wide Eyes (or Soft Eyes)

* Again, do it daily for as long as you follow this curriculum.

As we process information we do it visually, auditorily, kinesthetically, olfactorally, or

VC Visual Created: View images of things you’ve never seen or look at

K Kinesthetic: What’s the emotional context with tactile sensations

VR Visual Remembered: You’ve seen something before, but somehow

AR Auditory Recall a familiar sound: “What did I say before we

ID Internal Dialog: A conversation with yourself is more than common,

V Visual: A blank stare makes an impression, a real visual that

A trip to divorce court could be avoided if the parties involved realized:

Communication and understanding differences makes any sort of living arrangement

Eyes Those of us who look down to the right.

To be more persuasive with all groups, make the representation: BIGGER,

Visual Auditory Kinesthetic Unspecified Olfactory/Gust

Hazy Outspoken Grip Indicate Fresh

Possible strategies? An infinite number, but the six most common:

It’s so easy to learn another person’s Sensory Perceptual Style, or representational

Strategy playback makes you a silent partner or co-conspirator. You communicate

Modality Sub-Modality Questions

Pitch High or low-pitched?

Groups of three (Programmer, Client, and Meta-person roles) standing:

2. Organize a Circle of Excellence. “I want you to envision a circle of excellence right

NLP is one way of looking at the world:

2. The way you communicate elicits a response.

controlling element within a system.

5. People make the best choice available to them.

6. All behaviors are constructive in some way.

7. There is structure in experience. Chunking. We can achieve anything if it’s broken

into tiny doses.

8. Usually we have most of what we need.

9. We don’t fail. We try, and improve with feedback.

The Key Questions

1) What do you desire?

a) Put it in positive terms

1A) What will that particularly provide for you?

2) When will you be aware you’ve got it?

3) Decide with whom you want it – Where, as well as, when?

a) Make it sensory based and environmentally friendly

6) What else do you need to reach that goal?

7) What’s the route you need to take to get there?

a) Start with goals that you can achieve - be specific.

Communication with a client achieves a much-desired level of rapport and

1) You can establish an anchor quickly. Repeated motivations and