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Katelynn Nguyen

Dr. Lim

AP Language and Composition

15 February 2017

Understanding the Concerns of Gender Neutrality

Although there are those that have come to accept and support gender neutrality, there are

also people that find gender neutrality harmful. It is understandable since there are many flaws

with gender neutrality that causes harm to others. Vliet, a physician, believes that separate

restrooms and locker facilities for men and women would help provide physical and

psychological safety. Charges were filed against a man who wore a wig and women’s clothing to

disguise himself as he allegedly used a concealed camera to record ‘hours’ of video of women in

a Los Angeles-area department store restroom (Ellis). Others believe gender neutrality can be

psychologically and socially damaging, especially for young children. Young children can

become confused by the suggestion that there is a third, "in-between" gender at a time when their

brains and bodies are developing and by raising them gender neutral, they might not like it as

well (Rothschild). Consider Michelle, who publicly admitted she regularly battles her young

son’s interest in being a boy, “I’m constantly like trying to queer my relationship with him and

get him to wear tutus. He hates it. He’s just like, ‘no,’” she says (Goldenberg). These issues are

concerning and should be considered before shifting to a more gender neutral society as not

everyone could feel safe. It could affect young children whose parents may be trying to adapt a

more gender neutral environment to their children as well as the questioning safety of gender

neutral restrooms.
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There are several arguments opposing gender neutrality and one would be public

restrooms. Gender neutrality has become somewhat controversial, especially when it comes to

the issue of public restrooms. This is understandable because on account of two separate

incidents of "voyeurism," male students within the University of Toronto student residence were

caught holding their cellphones over female students' shower stalls and filming them as they

showered. Because this incident occurred, there are other universities that are holding off on

gender neutral bathrooms after hearing of the incidents. There should be separate bathroom and

locker facilities for men and women to help provide physical and psychological safety because it

could protect people from those who would do harm by giving into their sudden urge to rape or

molest others.

Other critics believe it can be psychologically and socially damaging, especially for

children. Young children can become confused by the suggestion that there is a third,

"in-between" gender at a time when their brains and bodies are developing (Rothschild). A few

couples that raise boys tend to tell boys that manhood is a matter of indifference. For example,

Atticus, a young boy, is being raised by two women who are openly uncomfortable with him

being a boy, “I’m constantly like trying to queer my relationship with him and get him to wear

tutus. He hates it. He’s just like, ‘no,’” Michelle said (Goldenberg). This lesbian couple is not

alone, this prompted a social media brag-fest from enlightened liberal parents, anxious to tell the

world how Priscilla loves dinosaurs far more than Liam, while Jackson marches proudly to

school carrying his My Little Pony backpack. Boys naturally​ ​regard manhood as an aspiration.

This becomes obvious when watching boys play. They love aggressive games involving battles

and quests. So when a child’s parent tells them to wear certain clothes, play certain toys for the
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opposite gender, it could make them uncomfortable and confuse them. Introducing gender

neutrality to children has many concerns that are appealing because they show that people

disagree out of concern for other people’s children.

To display to young children that they should not be feel discriminated just because of

their gender, societies should try and adopt gender neutrality. In a gender-neutral society, girls

and boys are meant to be treated as equals and are encouraged to compete in sports based on

their ability, not their gender. However, many cultures and ethnic groups live by concepts of

traditional gender-variant roles such as men are in charge of bringing the money home and

women are responsible for cooking. The Swedish government is incredibly intent on trying to

establish a gender neutral society that they are requiring teachers in some schools to stop

referring to students as “boys” or “girls”. Instead, all children are referred to with gender-neutral

pronouns – such as “hens” or “buddies” (Bianco). By referring to these children using gender

neutral pronouns, boys and girls are shown to have less of a stereotype with one another and

interact more. Whereas with teachers addressing them as boys and girls, they tend to shy away

from the opposite sex. Through gender neutrality, young children may be able to express

themselves and feel less confined to the gender binary of society.

Gender neutral toys may encourage kids to push beyond the boundaries of traditional

gender roles and help iron out real-world gender inequalities in the future. De-gendering toys

simply allows children to “be free to explore their diverse interests beyond the narrow confines

of gender stereotypes” (Shaw). The impact of sex-specific toy choice has implications for

children’s learning and attitudes far beyond the playground. Playing with masculine toys is often

associated with large motor development and spatial skills and play with feminine toys is
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associated with fine motor development, language development and social skills. Children may

then extend this perspective from toys and clothes into future roles, occupations, and

characteristics. Research suggests, too, that kids pay more attention to — and form more lasting

memories of — the toys they believe are meant for their gender. In 1986, psychologist Marilyn

Bradbard ​presented​ children ages four to nine with unfamiliar toys in gender-specific boxes, and

gave them six minutes to play. One week later, she and her team administered memory tests and

found that the girls had more detailed recollections of the objects in the “girly” box and vice

versa (Robb). Conversely, de-gendering toys will allow children, and arguably society at large,

to reap long-term benefits: when kids are offered equal choices from an early age, it logically

follows that they will continue to expect and demand equality in their personal, social and

professional lives. Toy choices should be based on kids’ personal interests, and not on their

gender.

A compromise should be made between those that support gender neutrality and those

that do not. One of those compromises can be made with regards to gender neutral bathrooms. A

probable solution could be to keep the existing bathrooms as is and create another bathroom just

for gender neutral people. In order to create these new bathrooms, government should help pay

for these bathrooms and propose the idea to the people. If anyone wants to help pay for these

bathrooms, then they can help instead of forcing taxes on everyone. Therefore, other people

could feel safe going to the restroom and gender neutral people could feel safe as well.

The problem has been the third-person singular pronoun that affects the minds of young

children and forcing them to wear certain clothes, play with certain toys for the opposite gender

(Rothschild). Instead, one could imagine that the "t" in "they" stands for "two or more," and
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simply omit it to make the singular form "hey" (Stauffer). Rather than making the boy wear a

tutu or have the girl play with cars, one can just show their children the different toys or clothes

without going overboard by talking to them about it. Toy around with what makes them feel

comfortable . This is just a way that a compromise could be reached between those that agree

and those that do not. Both sides are concerned for the well being and safety of others.
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Works Cited

Bianco, Marcie. “Sweden is Making a Move For Gender Equality the U.S. Would Never

Consider” ​Identities​. Identities, 21 October 2014. 13 December 2016. mic.com/articles

/101726/sweden-is-taking-a-mainstream-approach-to-gender-equality-the-us-would

-never-consider

Chin, Jessica. “University Of Toronto Gender-Neutral Bathrooms Reduced After Voyeurism

Reports” Huffington Post. Huffington Post, 6 October 2016. 15 February 2017.

huffingtonpost.ca/2015/10/06/u-of-t-bathrooms-voyeurism_n_8253970.html

Ellis, Hannah. “Target’s Trans Bathroom Policy Isn’t Really About Bathrooms.” ​CNSNews​.

CNSNews, 26 April 2016. 15 February 2017. cnsnews.com/commentary/hannah

-wegman/targets-trans-bathroom-policy-really-isnt-about-bathrooms

Goldenberg, Ashley. “Lesbian ‘Gender Non-Conforming’ Couple Tries to Force Son to Have a

‘Queer’ Gender Relationship” ​MrcTV​. MrcTV, 17 June 2016. 15 February 2017.

mrctv.org/blog/lesbian-gender-non-conforming-couple-tries-force-son-have-queer

-gender-relationship

Robb, Alicia. “How gender-specific toys can negatively impact a child’s development” New

York Times. New York Times, 12 August 2015. 15 February 2017.

nytlive.nytimes.com/womenintheworld/2015/08/12/how-gender-specific-toys

-can-negatively-impact-a-childs-development/

Rothschild, Nathalie. “Sweden’s New Gender-Neutral Pronoun: Hen.” ​Slate​. Slate, 11 April

2012. 5 February 2017. www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2012/04/hen_sweden

_s_new_gender_neutral_pronoun_causes_controversy_.html
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Shaw, Maureen. “Science shows gender neutral toys empower children, and possible society at

large.” ​Quartz​. Quartz, 05 September 2015. 27 January 2017. qz.com/494673/

science-shows-gender-neutral-toys-empower-children-and-possibly-society-at-large/

Stauffer, Peter. “A Solution to the Gender-Neutral Pronoun Problem.” ​Blueline​. Blueline, 11

February 2017. www.aese.org/SUM96/GENDER.HTM

Vliet, Elizabeth Lee. “Doc: ‘Gender Neutral’ Bathrooms are Dangerous.” ​World Net Daily​.

World Net Daily, 12 April 2016. 5 February 2017. www.wnd.com/2016/04/doc-gender

-neutral-bathrooms-are-dangerous/