How To Live Wisely

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How to Live Wisely

By RICHARD J. LIGHTJULY 31, 2015

THE NEW YORK TIMES

Photo
Credit
James Yang for The New York Times

Imagine you are Dean for a Day. What is one actionable


change you would implement to enhance the college
experience on campus?
I have asked students this question for years. The answers
can be eye-opening. A few years ago, the responses began to
move away from “tweak the history course” or “change the
ways labs are structured.” A different commentary, about
learning to live wisely, has emerged.
What does it mean to live a good life? What about a
productive life? How about a happy life? How might I think
about these ideas if the answers conflict with one another?
And how do I use my time here at college to build on the
answers to these tough questions?
A number of campuses have recently started to offer an
opportunity for students to grapple with these questions. On
my campus, Harvard, a small group of faculty members and
deans created a noncredit seminar called “Reflecting on Your
Life.” The format is simple: three 90-minute discussion
sessions for groups of 12 first-year students, led by faculty
members, advisers or deans. Well over 100 students
participate each year.
Here are five exercises that students find particularly
engaging. Each is designed to help freshmen identify their
goals and reflect systematically about various aspects of their
personal lives, and to connect what they discover to what
they actually do at college.
1. For the first exercise, we ask students to make a list of how
they want to spend their time at college.
What matters to you? This might be going
to class, studying, spending time with
close friends, perhaps volunteering in the
off-campus community or reading books
not on any course’s required reading list.
Then students make a list of how they
actually spent their time, on average, each
day over the past week and match the two
lists.
Finally, we pose the question: How well do your
commitments actually match your goals?
A few students find a strong overlap
between the lists. The majority don’t.
They are stunned and dismayed to
discover they are spending much of their
precious time on activities they don’t
value highly. The challenge is how to align
your time commitments to reflect your
personal convictions.
2. Deciding on a major can be amazingly difficult. One
student in our group was having a hard
time choosing between government and
science. How was she spending her spare
time? She described being active in the
Institute of Politics, running the Model
U.N. and writing regularly for The
Political Review. The discussion leader
noted that she hadn’t mentioned the word
“lab” in her summary. “Labs?” replied the
student, looking incredulous. “Why would
I mention labs when talking about my
spare time?” Half an hour after the
session, the group leader got an email
thanking him for posing the question.
3. I call this the Broad vs. Deep Exercise. If you could
become extraordinarily good at one thing
versus being pretty good at many things,
which approach would you choose? We
invite students to think about how to
organize their college life to follow their
chosen path in a purposeful way.

4. In the Core Values Exercise, students are presented with a


sheet of paper with about 25 words on it.
The words include “dignity,” “love,”
“fame,” “family,” “excellence,” “wealth”
and “wisdom.” They are told to circle the
five words that best describe their core
values. Now, we ask, how might you deal
with a situation where your core values
come into conflict with one another?
Students find this question particularly
difficult. One student brought up his own
personal dilemma: He wants to be a
surgeon, and he also wants to have a large
family. So his core values included the
words “useful” and “family.” He said he
worries a lot whether he could be a
successful surgeon while also being a
devoted father. Students couldn’t stop
talking about this example, as many saw
themselves facing a similar challenge.
5. This exercise presents a parable of a happy fisherman
living a simple life on a small island. The
fellow goes fishing for a few hours every
day. He catches a few fish, sells them to
his friends, and enjoys spending the rest
of the day with his wife and children, and
napping. He couldn’t imagine changing a
thing in his relaxed and easy life.
A recent M.B.A. visits this island and
quickly sees how this fisherman could
become rich. He could catch more fish,
start up a business, market the fish, open
a cannery, maybe even issue an I.P.O.
Ultimately he would become truly
successful. He could donate some of his
fish to hungry children worldwide and
might even save lives.
“And then what?” asks the fisherman.
“Then you could spend lots of time with
your family,” replies the visitor. “Yet you
would have made a difference in the world.
You would have used your talents, and fed
some poor children, instead of just lying
around all day.”
238
COMMENTS
We ask students to apply this parable to their own lives. Is it
more important to you to have little, accomplish little, yet be
relaxed and happy and spend time with family? Or is it more
important to you to work hard, use your talents, perhaps
start a business, maybe even make the world a better place
along the way?
Typically, this simple parable leads to substantial
disagreement. These discussions encourage first-year
undergraduates to think about what really matters to them,
and what each of us feels we might owe, or not owe, to the
broader community — ideas that our students can capitalize
on throughout their time at college.
At the end of our sessions, I say to my group: “Tell me one
thing you have changed your mind about this year,” and
many responses reflect a remarkable level of introspection.
Three years later, when we check in with participants, nearly
all report that the discussions had been valuable, a step
toward turning college into the transformational experience
it is meant to be.
Richard J. Light is a professor at Harvard Graduate School of Education and
author of “Making the Most of College.”
A version of this article appears in print on August 2, 2015, on page
ED13 of Education Life with the headline: How To Live Wisely.

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