communication

Skills Training
Communication
table Skills Training Tools
of contents

1 | Communication Skills Training ................................................................................................................. 4

2 | Criteria for Assessing Communication Competence ..................................... 14
3 | Communication Skills Self-Assessment Exercise .................................................. 17
4 | Communications Planning ......................................................................................................................... 25
5 | The Communication Cycle .......................................................................................................................... 27
6 | The 7 Cs of Communication ...................................................................................................................... 31
7 | Making a Great First Impression! ...................................................................................................... 35
8 | Body Language ............................................................................................................................................................... 38
9 | Mehrabians Communication Model ......................................................................................... 42
10 | Assertiveness .................................................................................................................................................................. 44
11 | Giving Feedback ....................................................................................................................................................... 48
12 | Getting Feedback ................................................................................................................................................... 50
13 | Feedback Matrix ........................................................................................................................................................ 53
14 | Active Listening ......................................................................................................................................................... 55
15 | Role Playing ....................................................................................................................................................................... 58
16 | Conflict Resolution ............................................................................................................................................... 59
17 | Journal writing ............................................................................................................................................................. 64
18 | Learner copy 1 .............................................................................................................................................................. 65
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

19 | Learner copy 2 ............................................................................................................................................................... 67

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

20 | Learner copy 3 .............................................................................................................................................................. 69

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

21 | Tutor copy 1 ....................................................................................................................................................................... 71

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
table Skills Training Tools
of contents

22 | Tutor copy 2 ....................................................................................................................................................................... 73

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

23 | Tutor copy 3 ....................................................................................................................................................................... 75

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

24 | Line manager/Mentor/Peer copy 1 ......................................................................................... 77

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

25 | Line manager/Mentor/Peer copy 2 ......................................................................................... 79

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

26 | Line manager/Mentor/Peer copy 3 ......................................................................................... 81

Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

27 | CERTIFICATE OF COMPLETION ......................................................................................................... 83

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Communication Skills Training Ascertaining the appropriate tone to use in any given
situation is the second step to success. This applies
when either written or verbal communication
I. Introduction is called upon. To be able to do this, you need to
understand who your audience is. A formal tone
1. Overview of the training. is more appropriate when addressing a new or
recently acquired customer than if you were to
Everyone uses interpersonal communication skills. address your colleagues in a team meeting.
We use them at home with our families, in the
workplace with our bosses and coworkers, on our Hand in hand with this approach is recognising
computers when we answer email, and on the when you need to adapt the way you present
telephone when we order pizza. This manual is information based on the experience of your
intended to help you improve your interpersonal audience. It would be reasonable to assume, when
communication skills and develop new skills to presenting information to a group of colleagues
become a more effective communicator. who have been working on a project with you,
that they would have a similar level of background
Interpersonal communication applies to all of knowledge and understanding as you do. Therefore
our relationships, personal and business. Others you could use common abbreviations and acronyms
respect or reject us based on our interpersonal without the need for explanation. Conversely if
communication skills. People send us messages you are communicating the results of your project
in every interpersonal communication encounter. to a new audience, you need to ensure that any
Those messages can be explicit (verbal comments) abbreviations or acronyms are clearly explained.
or implicit (nonverbal facial expressions, other body
language, and physical space).
The first step in communication is using the
appropriate method. In the work place there is likely
to be a variety of tools available and you will need
to decide whether a situation calls for an email, a
phone call or a face to face conversation.
In particular, when you are in a new job role, you
can gain benefits from making first approaches
with new colleagues by going to see them, or
by telephoning customers or clients introducing
yourself rather than using email. Both face to Communication should never be a one-way
face conversations and telephone calls allow process. When we talk about actively listening, it
you to have two-way conversation and give you means ensuring you are engaged with others in
an opportunity to get your personality across, order to understand what they are saying. Asking
which is far harder via email. Conversely email is questions and summarising the main points of
great if you are trying to organise a meeting or to the conversation is a good way of checking your
summarise the action points from a meeting as it understanding of what has been discussed and
is more time effective than telephoning everyone demonstrates that you have been listening to what
individually. the other person has been saying. Visibly showing

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

your interest in what others are saying helps to build geographical, social and Communications
rapport and can also be achieved through positive environments.
body language like appropriately maintaining eye
contact, smiling and nodding. Sound knowledge of Basic vocabulary,
functional grammar and style, functions of
Competency in written and verbal communication language.
skills means you are able to:
Awareness of various types of verbal interaction
1. Select appropriate and effective (conversations, interviews, debates, etc.) and the
communication methods. main features of different styles and registers in
2. Ascertain the appropriate tone and level of spoken language.
language in specific situations. Understanding the paralinguistic features of
3. Present information via a verbal or written communication (voice-quality features, facial
medium that is easily comprehensible to expressions, postural and gesture systems).
others. And to practice and to improve the:
4. Actively listen and pay attention to people, Skills needed to use aids (such as notes,
asking questions if necessary. schemes, maps) to produce, present or
This course, designed for AdValue project, will understand complex texts in written or oral
provide innovative training contents and tools to form (speeches, conversations, instructions,
allow participants to learn, practice and increase interviews, debates).
their Communication Skils. Ability to communicate, in written or oral form,
and understand, or make others understand,
2. Learning objectives. various messages in a variety of situations and
for different purposes. Communication includes
1. Familiarize the students with the concept the ability to listen to and understand various
of human communication; theories and spoken messages in a variety of communicative
dimensions; and its role in the success of the situations and to speak concisely and clearly. It
individual on personal, social, and practical also comprises the ability to monitor whether
levels. one is getting ones message across successfully
and the ability to initiate, sustain and end
2. Make sure that The student acquires
a conversation in different communicative
the necessary skills of the effective
contexts.
communication with himself and others in
social and formal settings. Ability to distinguish, in listening, speaking,
reading and writing, relevant from irrelevant
3. Teach the student how to apply these skills
information.
in various life situations.
Ability to formulate ones arguments, in speaking
The main aims of the training module are to foster:
or writing, in a convincing manner and take full
Awareness of the variability of language and account of other viewpoints, whether expressed
communication forms over time and in different in written or oral form.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

3. Learning outcomes the expected results from Communicate skills is therefore a challenging
the trainings training programme that incorporates material
from many disciplines. It aims to make a substantial
The student should be able to: difference to each participants leadership,
1. Identify basic communication principles. communication and relationship skills.

2. Apply a communication process model. The course is designed to equip participants with
the awareness, tools, confidence and energy to
3. Set clear goals for their communication. create the impact they choose, when they choose
4. Determine outcomes and results. to create it. Our central and guiding focus is to
constantly reinforce confidence in participants by
5. Initiate communications. concentrating on what works about the individual.
6. Avoid communication breakdowns. The training programme is a journey that begins by
exploring the dynamics and techniques of effective
7. Translate across communication styles.
interpersonal communication, moving on to the
8. Listen for improved understanding. subtle nuances of perception and finally to the
full impact of connection when presenting and
9. Achieve genuine communication. relationship building.
10. Match the body language to the message.
11. Work constructively with emotions. 5. Description of the physical framework of the
training:
12. Manage verbal communication.
Target group.
This course is designed for anyone who requires
1. the skills to clearly communicate with others in the
2. workplace and in the professional life. Therefore is
designed for individuals who want to:
3.
Learn and practice principles essential to good
4. oral and written communication.
5. Gain useful and pragmatic strategies for
communicating in a variety of workplace
4. Training Module AdValue.
situations.
Communication Skills Training programme is Speak, write, and listen with increased
designed for participants to take a serious look confidence and competence.
at themselves in relation to who they are now
and who and how they want to be in the future. Enhance leadership skills and opportunities for
Provides participants with the opportunity to career promotion.
understand how communication works and how Develop personal presence and greater self-
to communicate with confidence and flair. trust.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Learn in a supportive environment.

III. Training process
Optimal number of participants: 8-12
1. Subtopic N 1 The base of Communication.
Environment Indoor
1.1. Learning objectives.
Duration of the whole training module. 20 h
Upon completion of this subtopic, participants
Resources should be able to:
PowerPoint. Identify basic communication principles.
Sheets Recognize perceptual filters that hinder
communication.
Templates.
1.2. Trainers Toolbox.
Video.
Tool 1.A - Criteria for Assessing Communication
Segments of books. Competence
Tool 1.B - Communication Skills Self-assessment
exercise.
II. Topic template
1.3. Training process.
Approaches, Theory.
Subtopic Duration
methods, tools
During this unit we will identify basic communication
1. The base of Lecture / Group
2 hours principles and we will recognize perceptual filters
Communication Discussion
that hinder communication.
Lecture / Group
2. Setting clear
Discussion We will stress the Importance of removing barriers.
goals for your 4 hours
/ Individual Communication barriers can pop-up at every stage
communication
activities of the communication process (which consists
Lecture / Group of sender, message, channel, receiver, feedback
3. Communication Discussion /
2 hours
and context) and have the potential to create
in person Work in pairs / misunderstanding and confusion.
Role playing
Lecture / Group To be an effective communicator and to get
4. Feedback Discussion / 3 hours your point across without misunderstanding
Role playing and confusion, your goal should be to lessen the
frequency of these barriers at each stage of this
5. Listening Lecture / Group
for improved Discussion / 2 hours
process with clear, concise, accurate, well-planned
understanding Role playing communications.

6. Difficult Lecture / Group To deliver your messages effectively, you must

communication Discussion / 3 hours commit to breaking down the barriers that exist
situations Role playing in each of these stages of the communication
process.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Lets begin with the message itself. If your message in which interference was or could have been
is too lengthy, disorganized, or contains errors, avoided.
you can expect the message to be misunderstood
and misinterpreted. Use of poor verbal and body We will use Tools 1.A- Criteria for Assessing
language can also confuse the message. Communication Competence and 1.B-
Communication Skills Self-assessment exercise
Barriers in context tend to stem from senders so that to make trainees aware about different
offering too much information too fast. When in communication elements and to assess their own
doubt here, less is oftentimes more. It is best to be communication skill profile.
mindful of the demands on other peoples time,
especially in todays ultra-busy society. Such a discussion invariably brings out other
indirectly related aspects of spoken communication
Once you understand this, you need to work to which provide points of reference when subjects in
understand your audiences culture, making sure later unites are being dealt with.
you can converse and deliver your message to
people of different backgrounds and cultures
within your own organization, in this country and 2. Subtopic N 2 - Setting clear goals for your
even abroad. communication.

If you want to be an expert communicator, you need 2.1. Learning objectives.

to be effective at all points in the communication Upon completion of this subtopic, participants
process and you must be comfortable with the should be able to:
different channels of communication. When you
communicate well, you can be very successful. On 2.1 Determine outcomes and results
the other hand, poor communicators struggle to
Solicit feedback
develop their careers beyond a certain point.
Match intentions and results
Approaches and methods.
2.2 Initiate communications
Lecture/discussion with maximum trainee
participation through questioning and relating of Figure out what to say and the best way to say it
personal experience.
2.2. Trainers Toolbox.
The foregoing module is easily adapted to
discussion. The trainer should attempt to elicit from Tool 2 Communication Planning.
the trainees their experiences with transmission, Tool 3 Communication Cycle.
interference and ways of avoiding interference,
which are well within the purview of trainee Tool 4 The 7 Cs of Communication and training.
experience.
2.3. Training process.
Trainees should be asked to tell the course
Theory.
participants about good communicators and poor
communicators they have known, describing why The first principle of public speaking is to have a clear-
they are memorable. The reasons they give should cut objective. This unit provides clues for identifying
be related to the types of interference and ways and training how to plan the communication. To be

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

a successful public speaker, people must be able to We can spend almost our entire day
answer the following questions: communicating. So, how can we provide a huge
boost to our productivity? We can make sure that
1. Who is your audience?
we communicate in the clearest, most effective
2. What does the audience want most? way possible. Tool 4, 7 Cs of Communication,
provide a checklist for making sure that
3. How can you help get what they want?
meetings, emails, conference calls, reports, and
Tool 2 Communication Planning will help participants presentations are well constructed and clear so
through the preparation steps and so help them create the audience gets our message.
an audience-focused communication plan thats sure
Approaches and methods.
to get your message heard.
Lecture/ group discussion with maximum trainee
participation through questioning and relating of
personal experience.
Trainees will be asked to develop their own
communication planning, using the template and
recommendation of Tool 2.
Trainees will practice also with Tool 3-
Communication Cycle, and Tool 4, 7 Cs of
Communication. Participants will be asked to put
in common their results.

3. Subtopic N 3 Communication in person.

3.1. Learning objectives.

Do you ever get lost while organizing your message, Upon completion of this subtopic, participants
or struggle to identify what your audience truly should be able to:
needs to know? There are so many factors to 3.1.1. Create value in their conversations
consider during preparation and presentation that
its easy to forget an important point. Strength their relationships

The Communication Cycle, Tool 3, is a six-step Distinguish value from waste

process that helps participants to develop and 3.1.2. Take personal responsibility
refine their message. It helps them ensure that they
dont forget anything essential the first time they Recognize their role in creating successful
present it, and it helps them maximize its impact communications
in the times that follow. By putting the process into Identify internal and external factors that impact
the form of a cycle, this approach encourages them their communications
to use the feedback they receive to improve their
communications in the future. Communicate nondefensively

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

3.1.3. Match their body language to their So communication is made up of more than just the
message words we use. Our tone of voice, facial expression
and body language all play a major role in how
Enhance their message to gain their intended were understood. And if were communicating in a
results situation where we cant use all of these elements to
Creat believable and credible messages enhance our messages, we need to be very careful.

Ensure that their attitude supports rather than We might well have heard the popular statistic
hinders communication that only 7% of any message is conveyed through
the words you choose. The other 93% is allegedly
Speak through silence found in subtle clues like your tone of voice and
3.2. Trainers Toolbox. body language. This claim stems from a study done
by psychologist Albert Mehrabian in the late Sixties.
Tool 5 Make a great first impression. But beware, its all too often misquoted! In Tool 7
well explain what Mehrabians Communication
Tool 6 Non verbal communication.
Model really says, and look at how you can use its
Tool 7 Mehrabians Communication model. findings in your everyday life.

Tool 8 Assertiveness. Are you comfortable talking with people you

dont know? Do you dread saying no? Do you
3.3. Training process. allow strangers to cut you off in the cafeteria line?
Do you regret stepping on others to achieve your
Theory. goals? Do you feel you get your needs across to
others?
It takes just a quick glance, maybe three seconds, for
someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first Your words and behavior tell people who you are.
time. In this short time, the other person forms an Human communication and behavior fall into three
opinion about you based on your appearance, your basic categories:
body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms,
and how you are dressed. So whether they are in your 1. Passiveness.
career or social life, its important to know how to 2. Aggressiveness.
create a good first impression. Tool 5 will help us to
work on first impressions, providing some useful tips. 3. Assertiveness.

The difference between the words people speak and Assertiveness is an alternative to the extremes
our understanding of what they are saying comes of passiveness and aggressiveness. Norma Carr-
from non-verbal communication, otherwise known Ruffino defines assertion as confidently expressing
as body language. By developing your awareness what you think, feel and believe - standing up for
of the signs and signals of body language, you can your rights while respecting the rights of others.
more easily understand other people, and more Assertiveness is not necessarily easy, but it is a skill
effectively communicate with them. Tool 6 will that can be learned. Tool 8 will help us to identify
explain many of the ways in which we communicate and practice assertiveness.
non-verbally, so that you can use these signs and
signals to communicate more effectively. Approaches and methods.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 10
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Lecture/ group discussion with maximum trainee broken! In turn, we improvement could lead to
participation through questioning and relating of a promotion or to other opportunities down the
personal experience. road. It will also raise our self-confidence, and show
our boss that we truly care about our work. Working
Trainees will practice in pairs presentation skills, with Tool 10 well look at how to ask for feedback,
following the suggestions of Tool 5. and how you can learn from it.
They will practice in group the identification of non The feedback matrix is a useful tool that helps with
verbal aspects of communication as is showed in self-exploration. It encourages us to examine both
Tool 6. the positive and negative aspects of feedback,
Finally, they will practice assertiveness, making role and then connect the comments back to what we
playing in pairs that will be discussed in group with already know about opurself, and what wwe did
Tool 8. not know and need to explore more fully. We will
work with the matrix with Tool 11.
4. Subtopic N 4 - Feedback.
Approaches and methods.
4.1. Learning objectives.
Lecture/ group discussion with maximum trainee
Establish message feedback. participation through questioning and relating of
4.2. Trainers Toolbox. personal experience.

Tool 9 Giving feedback. Trainees will practice in pairs feedback skills,

following the suggestions of with Tools 9, 10 and
Tool 10 Getting feedback. 11.
Tool 11 Feedback matrix. They will get group feedback as well, performing
role playings in pairs that will be discussed in
4.3. Training process.
group.
Theory.
When done in the right way and with the right
5. Subtopic N 5 - Listening for improved
intentions, feedback communication is the avenue
understanding.
to performance greatness. Employees have to know
what they are doing well and not so well. For them 5.1. Learning objectives.
to really hear your thoughts and suggestions on
ways to improve, though, that feedback has to be Upon completion of this subtopic, participants
delivered carefully and frequently. Giving feedback should be able to:
effectively is a skill. And like all skills, it takes Ask clarifying questions
practice to build your confidence and improve. Toll
9 provides a collection of feedback giving tips that Confirm the message
trainees can start putting into practice. Demonstrate respect, empathy and sensitivity
To our skills and grow professionally, its essential Listen for the entire message
that we get feedback on the work that we do. After
all, we cant fix something that we dont know is Interpret nonverbal cues

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 11
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

5.2. Trainers Toolbox. should be able to:

Tool 12 Active Listening. 6.1 Create openness
5.3. Training process. Identify appropriate degrees of disclosure
Theory. Establish value and trust
Most of us think we are good listeners. We assume 6.2 Work in difficult communication situations
listening comes naturally. However, listening is just
as complicated as reading, writing and speaking. Ability to express anger appropriately.
Listening requires mental and physical activity. We Expression of ability to cope with aggression
spend 80 percent of each day listening. Listening is from others skillfully.
our most frequently used communication skill, yet
we often feel that it requires no effort on our part. 6.2. Trainers Toolbox.

During this unit we will be able to identify the Tool 13- Role Playing.
difference between Reflecting Listening and Tool 14- Conflict resolution.
Physical Listening. Reflective listening encourages
the other person to disclose his feelings, thereby 6.3. Training process.
helping him understand his emotions and move
toward a solution to the problem. Reflective
listening provides a mechanism that draws the
other person out. We will learn how we can do this
in several ways.
But listening involves also giving physical attention
to the speaker. We will learn also how to do it so that
to show interest in what is being said. Tool 12 will
give us the five key elements of active listening.
Approaches and methods.
Lecture/ group discussion with maximum trainee
participation through questioning and relating of
personal experience.
With Tool 12 will work on the five key elements of
active listening and trainees will be asked to work
in pairs to develop their listening skills.
Theory.
6. Subtopic N 6 - Difficult communication
situations. Role playing is a useful technique for thinking
about difficult situations before they occur, so that
6.1. Learning objectives. you have good pre-prepared responses for the
different eventualities that can arise. Role-playing
Upon completion of this subtopic, participants
can also be used to analyze problems from different

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 12
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

perspectives, to spark brainstorming sessions, to Tool 3 - Communication Cycle.

experiment with different solutions to a problem,
to develop team work, and help group problem- Tool 4 - The 7 Cs of Communication and
solving. More than this, by preparing for a situation training.
using role-play, people build up experience and Tool 5 Make a great first impression.
self-confidence in handling the situation in real life.
We will practices difficult communication situations Tool 6 Non verbal communication.
with Tool 13. Tool 7 Mehrabians Communication model.
In many cases, conflict in the workplace just seems Tool 8 Assertiveness.
to be a fact of life. Weve all seen situations where
different people with different goals and needs have Tool 9 Giving feedback.
come into conflict. And weve all seen the often-
Tool 10 Getting feedback.
intense personal animosity that can result. The fact
that conflict exists, however, is not necessarily a bad Tool 11 Feedback matrix.
thing: As long as it is resolved effectively, it can lead
to personal and professional growth. With Tool 14 Tool 12 Active Listening.
we will learn and practice how to resolve conflicts Tool 13 - Role Playing.
rationally and effectively.
Tool 14 - Conflict resolution.
Approaches and methods detailed
description
Lecture/ group discussion with maximum trainee
participation through questioning and relating of
personal experience.
Trainees will practice in pairs difficult communication
situations, following the suggestions of Tools 13
and 14.
They will get group feedback as well, performing
role playings in pairs that will be discussed in
group.

IV. Trainers Toolbox All the Annexes.

Tool 1.A - Criteria for Assessing Communication
Competence
Tool 1.B - Communication Skills Self-
assessment exercise.
Tool 2 - Communication Planning.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 13
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Criteria for Assessing 1. Social experience - participation in various

social interactions
Communication Competence
2. Social composure - refers to keeping calm
through accurate perception
Communication competence is the ability to relate
to others with accuracy, clarity, comprehensibility, 3. Social confirmation - refers to acknowledgment
coherence, expertise, effectiveness and of partners goals
appropriateness. It is a measure of determining 4. Appropriate disclosure - being sensitive to
to what extent the goals of interaction are amount and type of info
achieved. However, communicative competence
is contingent upon the context in which the 5. Articulation - ability to express ideas through
interaction takes place. Communication which is language
successful with one group in one situation may not 6. Wit - ability to use humour in adapting to social
be perceived as competent with a different group situations; ease tensions
in another situation. McCroskey (Self-report as an
approach to measuring) clarifies that: The domain 2. Conversational Involvement: Conversational
of communicative competence includes learning interaction is a factor that determines the degree to
what the available means are, how they have been which individuals participate in conversation with
employed in various situations in the past, and others. Specifically, receivers of communication
being able to determine the ones that have the differ in terms of their attentiveness and
highest probability of success in a given situation. perceptiveness. These parameters influence how
information and cues are received from others.
Canary and Cody (Interpersonal Communication)
provide six criteria for assessing competence. In a study involving 1000 self-assessment reports,
The criteria include - adaptability, conversational- Cegala D J (Interaction involvement: A cognitive
involvement, conversational-management, dimension of communicative competence.
empathy, effectiveness, and appropriateness. They Communication Education) found that
are explained in greater detail below: approximately 48% of individuals are not generally
highly involved in their conversations. He describes
1. Adaptability: Adaptability is the ability to assess perceptiveness as, the ability to assign appropriate
situations and when necessary change behaviors meanings to others behavior as well as the ability to
and goals to meet the needs of interaction. It signals understand what meanings others have assigned to
awareness of the other persons perspectives, ones own behavior. Attentiveness is cognizance of
interests, goals, and communication approach, anothers communicative behavior. Responsiveness
plus the willingness to modify ones own behaviors is a tendency to mentally react in a given situation
and goals to adapt to the interaction situation. or circumstance and adapt by knowing what to say
By mindfully tracking what is going on in the and when to say.
intercultural situation, both parties may modify
their nonverbal and verbal behavior to achieve Highly involved persons are predicted to be more
a more synchronized communication process. issue-oriented and attentive to the underlying
In modifying their behavioral styles, polarized message in the conversation. On the other hand,
views on the problem may also be depolarized or less involved persons are expected to concentrate
softened. It consists of six factors: on events or surface of the conversation.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

3. Conversational Management: Conversation- Empathy is the ability to demonstrate understanding

management is essentially the way the and sharing reactions in any given situation. It is
communicators regulate their interactions. It is an innate human capacity that gives the ability
a matter of knowing the rules of interpersonal to understand the unique experiences of another
communication exchanges and following them. person.
Communication rules are just like other socially
conditioned behaviors and are acquired in the It connects people with one another on a
same way. What are the rules that an astute and meaningful and fulfilling level.
observant communicator knows about to manage It demonstrates a persons caring attitude
interaction? toward others
It helps understand the people better.
It usually leads conversation towards emotional
issues.
It lets one build a personal rapport with others
It helps reduce ones irritation with others
attitude or behaviour.
It helps reduce ones prejudice or negative
assumptions about others
It fosters more meaningful, more helpful, closer
Wiemann J (Explication and Test of a Model friendships.
of Communicative Competence: Human
communication) mentions the five most common 5. Effectiveness: Effectiveness refers to the degree
communicative competencies: to which communicators achieve mutually shared
meaning and integrative goal-related outcomes.
1. First, one cannot interrupt the speaker. Effective encoding and decoding processes
2. Second, only one person may talk at a time. lead to mutually shared meanings. Mutually
shared meanings lead to perceived intercultural
3. Third, speakers turns must alternate or understanding. Interaction effectiveness has been
interchange. achieved when multiple meanings are attended
4. Fourth, frequent or long pauses are to with accuracy and when mutually desired
inappropriate. interaction goals have been reached. Interaction
ineffectiveness occurs when content or relational
5. Fifth, both parties should be assured that meanings are mismatched and intercultural noises
the other is devoting his or her undivided and clashes jam the communication channels.
attention. Communication effectiveness can improve task
productivity.
4. Empathy: Empathy, in its broadest usage,
is considered a fundamental dimensin of 6. Appropriateness: A fundamental criterion
interpersonal and communication competence. for determining communication competence,

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Communication Skills Training Tools

appropriateness is the ability to uphold the .85) and has strong face validity. It also has been
expectations of a given situation. Individuals found to have substantial predictive validity.
typically use their own expectations and scripts to
approach an interaction scene. They also formulate Directions: Below are twelve situations in which
their impressions of a competent communicator you might need to communicate. Peoples
on the basis of their perceptions of the others abilities to communicate effectively vary a lot, and
verbal and nonverbal behaviors in the particular sometimes the same person is more competent
interaction setting. To understand whether to communicate in one situation than in another.
appropriate communication has been perceived, Please indicate how competent you believe you are
it is vital to obtain competence evaluations from to communicate in each of the situations described
the standpoint of both communicators and below. Indicate in the space provided at the left of
interested observers. It is also critical to obtain each item your estimate of your competence.
both selfperception and other-perception data. Presume 0 = completely incompetent and
Appropriate communication behaviors can be 100 = competent.
assessed through understanding the underlying
values, norms, social roles, expectations, and scripts
1. Present a talk to a group of strangers.
that govern the interaction episode.
2. Talk with an acquaintance.

Self-Perceived Communication 3. Talk in a large meeting of friends.

Competence Scale (SPCC) 4. Talk in a small group of strangers.
The self-perceived communication competence 5. Talk with a friend.
scale was developed to obtain information
concerning how competent people feel they are 6. Talk in a large meeting of
in a variety of communication contexts and with acquaintances.
a variety of types of receivers. Early self-report
measures of competence were structured to 7. Talk with a stranger.
represent what the creators of the measures felt were
the components of communication competence. 8. Present a talk to a group of friends.
This scale is intended to let the respondent define
communication competence. Since people make 9. Talk in a small group of acquaintances.
decisions with regard to communication (for 10. Talk in a large meeting of strangers.
example, whether they will even do it), it is their
perception that is important, not that of an outside 11. Talk in a small group of friends.
observer. It is important that users of this measure
recognize that this is NOT a measure of actual 12. Present a talk to a group of
communication competence; it is a measure of acquaintances.
PERCEIVED competence. While these two different
types of measures may be substantially correlated, Scoring: To compute the sub-scores, add the
they are not the same thing. This measure has percentages for the items indicated and divide the
generated good alpha reliability estimates (above total by the number indicated below.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Public 1 + 8 + 12; divide by 3. Higher SPCC scores indicate higher self-perceived

communication competence with basic
Meeting 3 + 6 + 10; divide by 3. communication contexts (public, meeting, group,
Group 4 + 9 + 11; divide by 3. dyad) and receivers (strangers, acquaintance,
friend).
Dyad 2 + 5 + 7; divide by 3.
Source: McCroskey, J. C., & McCroskey, L. L.
Stranger 1 + 4 + 7 + 10; divide by 4. (1988). Self-report as an approach to measuring
Acquaintance 2 + 6 + 9 + 12; divide by 4. communication competence.

Friend 3 + 5 + 8 + 11; divide by 4.

To compute the total SPCC score, add the sub-
scores for Stranger, Acquaintance, and Friend. Then, Communication Skills
divide that total by 3.
Self-Assessment Exercise
Reliability Mean S.D.
In todays team-oriented workplace, the
Public .72 68.8 17.3 development of good interpersonal communication
Meeting .68 68.8 17.1 skills is an important key to success.
Group .67 76.1 14.6 The following self-assessment exercise is designed
Dyad .44 81.1 12.4 to help you evaluate your own interpersonal
communication skills and style, and provide you
Stranger .87 55.5 23.6
with helpful tips for becoming a good communicator
Acquaintance .84 77.4 15.3 - and team player!
Friend .78 66.2 11.3 In each of the following, read items A, B, and
Total .92 73.7 13.8 C, then mark the one that best describes your
communication style. (24 total)
1.
Public > 86 High SPCC < 51 Low SPCC

Meeting > 85 High SPCC < 51 Low SPCC A. When conversing with others, I usually
do most of the talking.
Group > 90 High SPCC < 61 Low SPCC
B. When conversing with others, I usually
Dyad > 93 High SPCC < 68 Low SPCC
let the other person do most of the talking.
Stranger > 79 High SPCC < 31 Low SPCC
C. When conversing with others, I try to
Acquaintance > 92 High SPCC < 62 Low SPCC equalize my participation in the conversation.
Friend > 99 High SPCC < 76 Low SPCC
Best answer: c. Conversations should be a balanced
Total > 87 High SPCC < 59 Low SPCC two-way flow of dialogue.

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CommunicationSkills
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This is a nice party, isnt it?

2.
Could I get you something to drink?
A. When I first meet someone, I wait for the
other person to make the
introduction first. 4.

B. When I first meet someone, I introduce A. I make an effort to remember and use
myself with a smile and offer a peoples names.

handshake. B. I dont pay attention to names as I tend

to forget them.
C. When I first meet someone, I hug the
person. C. I only learn the names of important
people.
Best answer: b. Its good to initiate the introduction
and introduce yourself with a handshake and smile. If Best answer: a. Its good to call people by name
shaking hands is difficult, a quick head nod is a good whenever possible. It makes a good, lasting
substitute. Initiating the introduction with a smile impression, and it makes the other person feel
and handshake (or head nod) helps build rapport. important and special. To help remember names, try
these techniques:
Repeat: After the person tells you his or her
3. name, immediately use it several times in the
A. I usually warm-up new conversations conversation.
with small talk. Its nice to meet you, Bob.
B. I usually avoid small talk and jump into I agree with you, Bob.
more important matters.
That was a great joke, Bob!
C. I usually avoid starting conversations.
Associate: Associate the persons name to
Best answer: a. Its good to initiate conversations with something unique and special.
small talk. Topics to warm-up the conversation might
include a chat about the weather, news of interest, or You might:
impressions about the current activity (if youre at a - Associate the persons name with a unique feature
meeting, staff party, or other gathering, for example). about the person. For example:
Examples of conversation starters might be: Gilda has beautiful green eyes.
Its sure warm today, isnt it? Think - GG - Green Gilda
Did you hear about the big accident on the Jack tells funny jokes.
freeway? Traffics backed-up for miles.
Think - JJ - Joking Jack
What did you think about the Blazers game last
night? - Associate the name with a visual picture. For

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CommunicationSkills
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Example: C. I smile at appropriate times while

conversing.
Sandy - visualize a sandy beach.
Best answer: c. Smiling when greeting people and at
Glenn - visualize John Glenn launching into appropriate times greatly helps build rapport.
space.
- Associate the name with a personal connection. For
example: 7.
Brian - My uncles name is Brian. A. I make eye contact while conversing.
Lucy - I had a turtle named Lucy. B. I sometimes make eye contact while
conversing.
Jot: Jot the persons name down with an identifying
description that will help jog your memory later. C. I never make eye contact while
conversing.
For example:
Best answer: a. Making eye contact is important
Chuck - tall; glasses; works in Accounting; has twin for building rapport. It gives the impression youre
sister; runs marathons; new to Portland. interested and engaged in the conversation, and you
have good self-confidence.

5. Eye contact should include frequent breaks to

avoid staring (this can make the other person
A. I frequently use courtesy words and uncomfortable). Break eye contact frequently
phrases - Please, Thank you, Youre welcome, - glance down to the side, then quickly make
Im sorry. eye contact again. Glancing down to the side is
important. If you instead glance to the side (as if
B. I occasionally use these courtesy words looking out the window, for example) or look up,
and phrases. it gives the person the impression youre distracted
C. I never use these courtesy words and and not paying attention to whats being said. This
phrases. quickly breaks down rapport.

Best answer: a. Regular use of these courtesy words

and phrases is important to show politeness and build 8.
rapport.
A. While conversing, I hold my head still at
all times.
6. B. While conversing, I nod my head at
appropriate times.
A. I tend to be serious and dont smile often
while conversing. C. While conversing, I nod my head
constantly.
B. I smile all the time while conversing.
Best answer: b. Occasionally nodding your head to

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Communication Skills Training Tools

indicate you agree or understand helps build rapport. B. To end a conversation, I begin to look
Again, it shows you are interested and engaged in the impatient hoping the person will get the hint.
conversation.
C. To end a conversation, I wrap up with a
closing statement.
9. Best answer: c. Its best to bring the conversation to an
A. While conversing, I stand one-foot away end by making a polite closing comment or gesture.
from the person. Good closing (wrap-up) comments might be:

B. While conversing, I stand two- to three- Ive enjoyed talking with you.
feet away from the person. Let me give you my business card.
C. While conversing, I stand five- to six-feet Well, I need to go speak with....
away from the person.
Do you know a person I can contact?
Best answer: b. Your arms length is the appropriate
distance (between two- to three-feet). Standing
closer than arm-length makes the other person feel
12.
uncomfortable (or feel threatened). Standing a further
distance away breaks down rapport. A. If a co-worker has put on weight, I say
nothing about it.
10. B. If a co-worker has put on weight, I tell
the person that he or she has
A. I often stand while talking to a person
who is sitting. changed in appearance.
B. I often sit while talking to a person who C. If a co-worker has put on weight, I
is sitting. honestly tell the person that he or she looks fat.
C. I often lean down while talking to a Best answer: a. Its best to say nothing. Never say
person who is sitting. anything that might hurt or offend the person.
Its called being tactful. Its always best to give
Best answer: b. Communicating at eye level helps compliments only, and only say things that will make
build rapport. So, if the person is sitting and a chair the person feel good.
is available, take a seat! Theres one exception - If you
walk into your supervisors office or co-workers office, I like your dress.
its best to ask the supervisor or co-worker if you can sit
Thats a nice shirt.
down first. Even better, wait for an invitation to sit. The
person may not have time to talk at that moment.

13.
11.
A. When Im listening to the speaker, I often
A. To end a conversation, I often just leave. cross my arms over my chest.

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B. When Im listening to the speaker, I often C. While listening, I watch the person speak,
lean back and turn my body but I dont hear a word.
away from the speaker. Best answer: b. If youre a good listener, you keep
mentally busy searching for for meaning in the
C. When Im listening to the speaker, I often message, and you ask questions. This mental search
lean slightly forward and face for meaning helps keep you focused, attentive, and
my body toward the speaker. engaged. If you get easily distracted, try taking notes if
the setting is appropriate. Note-taking helps draw and
Best answer: c. Leaning slightly forward and facing focus your attention as you must mentally search for
the speaker shows youre interested, and it helps build meaning and listen for information in order to take
rapport. Sitting with your arms crossed over your notes. This might be helpful in meetings, for example.
chest gives the message you are defensive. Leaning
back with your body or turning your body away from If you watch someone speak but you dont hear
the speaker gives the message that you are bored, a word, gauge if you are bored, tired, might have
disinterested, or feel in charge. Such body language a gap between your speaking and listening rates,
breaks down rapport. or are experiencing emotional deafness. We
all experience emotional deafness on occasion,
especially when were feeling overwhelmed, upset,
14. or nervous. You hear people ask - Im sorry, what
did you say? or make the comment - I have a lot
A. When I cross my leg, I cross my leg facing on my mind right now. Could you repeat what you
the speaker. said? If its a frequent problem, gauge the source
and seek help if needed.
B. When I cross my leg, I cross my leg away
from the speaker.
C. When I cross my leg, I bob my foot. 16.
Best answer: a. Crossing your leg toward the speaker A.When someone talks about an unfortunate
shows youre interested, and it builds rapport. or sad experience, I dont comment about it.
Crossing your leg away from the speaker gives the
message that you are defensive, disinterested, or B. When someone talks about an unfortunate
feel in charge. In essence, you are putting up a subtle or sad experience, I try to change the subject.
barrier. And if you bob or swing your foot, youre C. When someone talks about an
sending the message that youre anxious or nervous! unfortunate or sad experience, I try to relate to the
persons feelings and show sensitivity to his or her
misfortune.
15.
Best answer: c. Showing empathy (sensitivity) to
A. While listening, I tend to be distracted by another persons feelings helps build rapport. Its called
things going on around me. reaching out to people. Empathy can be shown by
making comments, such as:
B. While listening, I listen for meaning and
ask questions. That must have been a scary (or upsetting)

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experience for you. comment, I just say it.

I felt the same way when that happened to me. B. When I have a negative opinion or
comment, I lead in with a positive comment first.
I know (understand) how you feel.
___ C. When I have a negative opinion or comment,
I can imagine how you feel. I say nothing.
I would feel that way too in your situation. Best answer: b. Its best to say something positive first,
then express a negative opinion or comment in a
tactful way. Consider these examples:
17.
Positive lead:
A. When I discuss a topic, I tend to talk
about and focus on positive (good) aspects. I like many aspects of your idea (positive lead), but
it may not work well for this department. (tactfully
B. When I discuss a topic, I tend to talk stated)
about and focus on the negative (bad) aspects.
Interpretation: The idea wont work.
C. When I discuss a topic, I tend to
complain. Positive lead:

Best answer: a. Focusing on the positive (good) You did a nice job setting the bread plates and
aspects draws peoples attention in a favorable way, glasses (positive lead), but the forks need to be
and people enjoy the conversation more. People placed to the left. (tactfully stated)
are generally more attracted to a person who has a Interpretation: The forks are in the wrong place.
positive outlook on life. And when it comes to work
evaluations, positive-minded people generally do Positive lead (with empathy):
better. Consider the following examples:
I know you worked a long time on this (positive
Positive: The plan has some good ideas. lead), but it would look better retyped. (tactfully
stated)
Negative: The plan has some serious problems.
Interpretation: It needs to be retyped.
Complaint: No one ever listens to my ideas.
Positive: These changes might have some
benefits. 19.
Negative: These changes would be awful. A. When I receive unfavorable feedback, I
note where I need to improve.
Complaint: Im always having to relearn and re-do
everything around here. B. When I receive unfavorable feedback, I
get angry and defensive.
C. When I receive unfavorable feedback,
18. I deny the problem, make excuses, or plead
A. When I have a negative opinion or ignorance.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Best answer: a. When you receive feedback, its Example 2:

important to know what you do well, but its equally
important to know where improvements can be Your presentation covered the main points very
made to increase your chances for success. Few well (positive lead), but I noticed (observation)
people do everything well, and youve undoubtedly contact information was left out (work feedback).
heard the saying - No one is perfect. Simply make I wonder if it might be good to include a contact
note of weak areas (we all have them!) and make name and phone number (suggestion).
changes needed. Receiving honest feedback is truly Notice it says - ...contact information was left out
a gift. It usually means someone cares and wishes instead of - you left out contact information. It
to see you succeed. avoids using you.
Example 3:
20. I like your ideas (positive lead), but it appears
A. When I give a person negative feedback, (observation) the delivery (communication style
I focus on the persons observable work or behavior or behavior) weakens them. Perhaps they could
and offer suggestions. be written down and handed out to everyone to
review (suggestion).
B. When I give a person negative feedback,
I focus on what I dont like about the person. Notice it says - ...the delivery weakens them instead
of - you weaken them. It avoids using you.
C. When I give a person negative feedback,
I simply tell the person what to do right.
Best answer: a. When you give negative feedback, you 21.
should focus on and communicate your observations A. When I give a person negative feedback,
of the persons work or behavior, not focus on nor judge I do it around others so everyone can hear.
the person. Focus on performance, not personality (or
personal traits). B. When I give a person negative feedback,
I do it in front of the supervisor.
After sharing your observation about the persons
work or behavior, offer a suggestion in a tactful C. When I give a person negative feedback,
way. Consider these examples: I talk with the person alone in a private place.

Example 1: Best answer: c. Its always best to meet the person

privately and away from other people so others cant
The forms you completed were thoroughly hear.
done (positive lead), but I notice (observation)
there are a few spelling errors (work feedback).
Perhaps they can be corrected with correction fluid 22.
(suggestion).
A. When I disagree with a person, I listen
Important: Notice it says - ...there are a few spelling first, ask questions for clarification, then disagree
errors instead of - you made a few spelling errors. non-judgmentally.
Leave out you whenever possible.

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B. When I disagree with a person, I quickly in appropriate ways, humor is beneficial for group
point out the person is wrong and why. dynamics. Humor helps break the ice when people
first meet. Humor helps relieve stress and tension. A
C. When I disagree with a person, I say little humorous observation and comment helps lower
or nothing. the heat when a heated discussion gets too hot.
Best answer: a. Its fine to disagree, but its important And most importantly, humor helps build team
to disagree agreeably. cohesiveness.

This means you should: If you observe people at a gathering, youll notice
people naturally gravitate toward people considered
1) show respect for the other persons ideas, approachable. Approachable people are the ones
2) listen attentively until the person is done, who smile; they are the ones who add humor and
lightness to conversations; and they are the ones
3) ask questions if needed, who make fun of themselves in a selfdeprecating
and humorous way. In any group setting, smiles
4) disagree non-judgmentally, and, if possible,
attract, and humor bonds people together. Do you
5) offer an alternative solution. know a good joke?

Consider these examples: Idea: If youre like many people who have difficulty
remembering humorous lines, puns, anecdotal
I respect your view, John, (shows respect) but I stories, or jokes, consider creating a humor file.
think the problem is due to a lack of time (point Clip and save humorous jokes, stories, and puns
of disagreement). One way to solve the problem from the newspaper. Write down and save jokes
might be to computerize repair reports (offered and funny stories you hear. Your file will be a good
solution). resource to draw from for upcoming social events
I hear what youre saying (shows respect), but it and gatherings.
seems the staff would do better, not worse, with
flextime schedules (point of disagreement). I would
suggest we try it for six months (offered solution).

23.
A. When Im in a group, I tend to frown a
lot.
B. When Im in a group, I tend to smile and
use humor at appropriate times.
C. When Im in a group I tend to be
serious.
Best answer: b. At appropriate times, its always good
to smile. And when used at appropriate times and

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Communications Planning
Getting the right messages across in
the right way

Whether you need to communicate general day-to-

day information or big news about major changes Understand Your Audiences
in your organization, the best communications
start with some good planning. Step 2. Now identify and list your different
audiences. Try to identify who to communicate
The first step is to put yourself in the shoes of your with and why.
audience. What do they need to know, and want
to hear? Whats their preferred way of receiving Step 3. Now drill down into your communication
information? What will stop them listening to what objectives and clarify specific objectives for each
you have to say? And how will you know that they audience. A good way to do this is to think about
have got the message? the audiences needs what do they need and want
to know from you? List all the objectives (there may
So theres quite a bit more to good communications be several) for each audience in your plan.
than preparing a good memo or presentation!
This tool will help you through the preparation Plan Communications Messages
steps and so help you create an audience-focused and Channels
communication plan thats sure to get your message
Once you have clarified your objectives and got a
heard.
full understanding of the different audiences you
need to communicate with, its time to plan the
How to Use the Tool communications that means working out the
messages needed to meet your objectives and
Use the following steps to create a good
when and how these will be delivered.
communication plan for your company or project.
Step 4. Before starting on the detail of your plan,
Understand Your Objectives
first jot down all the possible communications
Step 1. Be clear about your overall communication channels you could use. Think broadly and
objectives. What do you want to achieve, when and creatively! You probably already use lots of great
why? Record your overall objectives in your plan. ways to communicate in your company, and some
new ones may help get your message across. Here
Figure 1: Communications Planning Template is a list to get you started:
Communications Plan For ................................................................................................................... Email
Overall Communication Objective:
Newsletter
Communication
Audience Message Channel Timing Teleconference
Objectives
Notice boards
CEO briefing

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Posters Tip:
Lunchtime meeting One saying in marketing is that prospects need
Intranet article to see your message seven times before they
buy. While this may be over-precise, you may
Launch event need to give your message many times over
Team meeting before it sinks in.
Podcast on intranet On the other hand, as you plan for each audience,
remember also that members of one audience
may also be part of another audience, and so
Tip: Remember to Use Existing Channels
may receive several messages. Try to plan your
Big corporate news often gets announced at communications so that individuals receive the
big corporate events. But dont forget to use right information and are not inundated, or
existing channels too, such as staff newsletters, worse, confused by the different messages they
the intranet and team meetings. Using existing receive.
channels with the right message at the right
time is an effective and familiar way to reach
your audience. Monitor Effectiveness
Step 5. To plan out the message for each audience, Step 6. Its good to get feedback on the
start by thinking about the broadest audience communications you have planned and
groups first. In our example, the broadest audience implemented. Ask people from different audiences
might be All people working in New Jersey Office how you are doing. Check they understand the
and All people working in Sydney Office. messages you need them to hear. By getting timely
feedback, you can tune any future communications
As you consider each audience in turn, ask the
that you have planned to better meet peoples
following questions:
needs or fill any gaps so far.
What does the audience need and want to
know?
When do we need to communicate?
What is the regular or preferred channel for
reaching this audience?
For this specific audience and message, what
is the most effective way to get your message
across?
Several messages over time may be required to
meet the objectives of each audience. Make sure the
messages you plan add up to meet the audiences
objectives.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

The Communication Cycle Note 1:

Six Steps to Better Communication You can apply the Communication Cycle
to any situation where communication is
Communication Skills Training Tools involved, but youll likely find it most useful for
Do you ever get lost while organizing your message,
preparing and delivering important or complex
or struggle to identify what your audience truly
communications, such as team or organizational
needs to know? There are so many factors to
emails, marketing materials, and presentations.
consider during preparation and presentation that
TheCommunicationCycle
its easy to forget an important point. Note 2:
Six Steps to Better Communication
The Communication Cycle is a six-step process The Communication Cycle doesnt include a
that helps you develop and refine your message. test step. However, you can still apply steps 3,
It helps you
Do you everensure
get lostthat
whileyou dontyour
organizing forget anything
message, or struggle to4,identify
5 andwhat6 toyour
testing your communication. (For
audience
essential thetruly needs
first timeto know? There are it,
you present so and
many it
factors
helps to consider during preparation
example, by asking colleagues to proofread
and presentation that it's easy to forget an important point.
you maximize its impact in the times that follow. and comment on text, or by practicing a
By putting the process
The Communication intois the
Cycle formprocess
a six-step of a cycle, thisyou develop
that helps presentation in front of a small group.) You then
and refine your
message.
approach It helps you ensure
encourages you to thatuse
youthe
don'tfeedback
forget anything
you essentialusetheany
firstfeedback
time you to change and improve your
present
receive toit,improve
and it helpsyour
you maximize its impact in the
communications in times
the that follow. By putting the
message when you restart the cycle.
process into the form of a cycle, this approach encourages you to use the feedback you
future.
receive to improve your communications in the future.
Understanding the Communication Cycle How to Use the Communication Cycle
UnderstandingtheCommunicationCycle
The Communication Cycle (shown below in Figure Follow these steps to use the cycle:
The Communication Cycle (shown below in Figure 1) provides a checklist that helps you
1) provides a checklist that helps you communicate Step 1: Clarify Your Aim
communicate effectively with your audience.
effectively with your audience.
Figure 1 Organize your thoughts about the message that
Figure 1 you want to communicate by answering these
questions:
1. Aim

2, Compose / To whom am I communicating?

Encode

What message am I trying to send, and what

am I trying to achieve with it?
Why do I want to send this message? Do I
6. Change /
Improve need to send it at all?
3. Transmit /
Deliver
What do I want my audience to feel?
What does my audience need or desire from
this message?
5. Analyze /
Decode / What do I want my audience to do with this
Learn 4. Received
feedback information?
Step 2: Compose/Encode

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Now that youve organized your thoughts with the Do you know how to read body language, and
questions in Step 1, start crafting your message. use it to steer your presentation?
Think about:
If youre giving a speech or presentation, will you
What is the best way to communicate this allow time for a question-and-answer session?
message?
Will you have a process for getting feedback
What level/type of language should I use? from your audience?
Does the audience have any background When you receive feedback, is it generally what
information on my topic? you want and expect?
Will my audience need any additional resources Remember to use indirect feedback here too. Did
to understand my message? you get the response that you wanted from your
Am I expressing emotions in my message? If so, communication? Is there anything more that you
which emotions? can interpret from the response that you received?

Will the audience assume anything about me or

my motives that will hurt communication?
Step 3: Transmit/Deliver
The way that you communicate your message is
vital to ensuring that your audience receives it
effectively. Ask yourself:
Is this the right time to send this message?
What is my audiences state of mind likely to be, Step 5: Analyze/Decode/Learn
and what workload will they be experiencing
when they receive this message? How should I Use the feedback you received in Step 4 to learn
present my message to take account of this? and grow. Depending on your situation, you might
need to rewrite your message and try again. (One
Will there be any distractions that may
of the benefits of testing your message on a small
hurt communication? (This is especially
important to consider when giving a speech or scale is that you can do this before the big day.)
presentation.) Why did you receive this feedback? What does
Should I include anyone else in the audience? this tell you about your message?

Step 4: Receive Feedback What could you have done differently to get the
response you wanted?
This is a key step in the Communication Cycle.
Without feedback from your audience, youll never Did the audience feel the way you expected
know how you can improve the way that you them to feel? If not, why not?
communicate your message. How should you act or behave differently to
Make sure that you include some type of feedback move forward?
process as part of your communication.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Step 6: Change/Improve What do I want my audience to feel?

This step completes the cycle. All of the feedback o I want them to feel excited about the
in the world wont help you unless you commit to valuable service that IT performs, and concerned
learning and changing. about the threats the company might face if our staff
is cut.
Honor and respect the feedback youve received.
If you believe its valid, change your message or What does my audience need or desire in order
behavior. to receive this message?
Identify resources to help you improve (asking o My audience needs to understand
colleagues; doing more testing; or using surveys, thoroughly what IT does and, specifically, that we
classes, books, seminars, and so on). protect the organization from daily threats. The board
A Communication Cycle Example will need strong data about the money weve saved
the company over the past two years.
Using the Communication Cycle is fairly
straightforward. Think of it as a checklist for creating What do I want my audience to do with this
your messages, big or small. information?

Heres an example. Youre responsible for IT in your o They must understand that giving IT
organization, and you need to create a presentation additional funding is in their best interest.
for your CEO and executive board. The content Step 2: Compose/Encode
should explain exactly what the IT department
does, and how much work youre all responsible What is the best way to communicate this
for. The presentations goal is to show how vital IT is message?
to the organization so that you can hire additional
staff to manage the workload, instead of facing o Group presentation.
budget cuts next quarter. What level/type of language should I use?
Heres how you could use the Communication Cycle o I should avoid using IT jargon and terms.
to organize your presentation effectively. My language should be professional, but easy to
Step 1: Aim understand.

To whom am I communicating? Does the audience have any background

information on this message?
o The CEO and executive board.
o Some members of the executive board have
What message am I trying to send? only a vague understanding of what IT does. Others
o I must show that IT is an essential part of the have a much sharper idea.
organization, and that we deserve additional funding
o The executive board has figures to show
to hire more staff.
that the IT budget is higher than that of other
Why do I want to send this message? departments.
o Without the boards understanding, they Will my audience need any additional resources
might cut our budget next year. to understand my message?

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Communication Skills Training Tools

o Graphs and statistics, on paper or in a Step 4: Receive Feedback

PowerPoint presentation, will be helpful visuals.
Ill allow 10 minutes at the end of the
Am I expressing emotions in my message? If so, presentation for a question-and-answer session
which emotions? with the board.
o I must express how excited I am by my job Ill meet with the CEO immediately after the
and my department, as well as the urgency we all feel presentation to get his input.
when faced with additional budget cuts, especially
when we provide such an important service to the Im going to do some research on body
organization. language, which will help me see cues from
board members on how Im doing throughout
Will the audience assume anything about me the presentation.
that will hurt communication?
Steps 5 and 6: Analyze, and Improve
o They might assume that, since Im in IT, Ill
naturally be a poor communicator. I must prove right A few days after the presentation, your boss tells you
away that this isnt true. that the board liked your message and approved
additional funding, thanks to your convincing
Step 3: Transmit/Deliver statistics and message. However, they thought that
Is this the right time to send this message? the presentation was a little too long.

o Yes, because the board will soon approve the With this knowledge, you commit to shortening
budget for the next year. your speeches and presentations in the future,
and youll do a better job cutting unnecessary
What is my audiences frame of reference? What information while youre creating your message.
is likely to be their state of mind and workload
when they receive this message?
o Theyre likely to be overloaded with Key Points
information already. I must be concise, yet
convincing. The Communication Cycle is a six-step process
Will there be any distractions that may hurt for organizing and presenting a message
communication? effectively. You can apply it in all situations that
involve communication, and its most useful for
o The presentation will likely be in Conference important or complex communications.
Room A. Theres a noisy air vent in that room, so Ill
have to speak loudly. Because effective communication is so vital,
the advantage of this process is in its cyclical
o The presentation is near the end of a long nature. You organize, present, receive feedback,
day for the executive team, so they might be tired or and improve your communication, so that next
lose interest easily. time youre able to communicate even more
Should I include anyone else from the effectively.
audience?
o No.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

The 7 Cs of Communication What is this email about? Well, were not sure. First,
if there are multiple Daniels in Johns department,
A Checklist for Clear Communication John wont know who Skip is talking about.
This is why the 7 Cs of Communication are helpful. Next, what is Daniel doing, specifically, thats so
The 7 Cs provide a checklist for making sure that great? We dont know that either. Its so vague that
your meetings, emails, conference calls, reports, John will definitely have to write back for more
and presentations are well constructed and clear information.
so your audience gets your message.
Last, what is the purpose of this email? Does Skip
According to the 7Cs, communication needs to be: simply want to have an idle chat about Daniel,
or is there some more specific goal here? Theres
Clear.
no sense of purpose to this message, so its a bit
Concise. confusing.
Concrete.
Good Example
Correct.
Lets see how we could change this email to make
Coherent.
it clear.
Complete.
Hi John,
Courteous.
I wanted to write you a quick note about Daniel
Kedar, whos working in your department. In recent
1. Clear weeks, hes helped the IT department through several
When writing or speaking to someone, be clear pressing deadlines on his own time.
about your goal or message. What is your purpose
Weve got a tough upgrade project due to run over
in communicating with this person? If youre not
the next three months, and his knowledge and skills
sure, then your audience wont be sure either.
would prove invaluable. Could we please have his
To be clear, try to minimize the number of ideas help with this work?
in each sentence. Make sure that its easy for
Id appreciate speaking with you about this. When is it
your reader to understand your meaning. People
best to call you to discuss this further?
shouldnt have to read between the lines and
make assumptions on their own to understand Best wishes,
what youre trying to say. Skip
Bad Example This second message is much clearer, because
the reader has the information he needs to take
Hi John,
action.
I wanted to write you a quick note about Daniel, whos
working in your department. Hes a great asset, and 2. Concise
Id like to talk to you more about him when you have
time. When youre concise in your communication, you
stick to the point and keep it brief. Your audience
Best, doesnt want to read six sentences when you could
Skip communicate your message in three.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Are there any adjectives or filler words that stay in their minds longer than a traditional sales
you can delete? You can often eliminate words pitch.
like for instance, you see, definitely, kind of,
literally, basically, or I mean. What do you think?
Jessica
Are there any unnecessary sentences?
Have you repeated the point several times, in 3. Concrete
different ways? When your message is concrete, then your audience
Bad Example has a clear picture of what youre telling them. There
are details (but not too many!) and vivid facts, and
Hi Matt, theres laserlike focus. Your message is solid.
I wanted to touch base with you about the email Bad Example
marketing campaign we kind of sketched out last
Thursday. I really think that our target market Consider this advertising copy:
is definitely going to want to see the companys
The Lunchbox Wizard will save you time every day.
philanthropic efforts. I think that could make a big
impact, and it would stay in their minds longer than A statement like this probably wont sell many of
a sales pitch. these products. Theres no passion, no vivid detail,
nothing that creates emotion, and nothing that
For instance, if we talk about the companys efforts to
tells people in the audience why they should care.
become sustainable, as well as the charity work were
This message isnt concrete enough to make a
doing in local schools, then the people that we want
difference.
to attract are going to remember our message longer.
The impact will just be greater. Good Example
What do you think? How much time do you spend every day packing
Jessica your kids lunches? No more! Just take a complete
Lunchbox Wizard from your refrigerator each day to
This email is too long! Theres repetition, and theres give your kids a healthy lunch AND have more time
plenty of filler taking up space. to play or read with them!
Good Example This copy is better because there are vivid images.
Watch what happens when were concise and take The audience can picture spending quality time
out the filler words: with their kids and what parent could argue with
that? And mentioning that the product is stored in
Hi Matt, the refrigerator explains how the idea is practical.
I wanted to quickly discuss the email marketing The message has come alive through these details.
campaign that we analyzed last Thursday. Our target
market will want to know about the companys 4. Correct
philanthropic efforts, especially our goals to become
When your communication is correct, it fits your
sustainable and help local schools.
audience. And correct communication is also error-
This would make a far greater impact, and it would free communication.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Do the technical terms you use fit your audiences you finished last week. I gave it to Michelle to proof,
level of education or knowledge? and she wanted to make sure you knew about the
department meeting were having this Friday. Well be
Have you checked your writing for grammatical creating an outline for the new employee handbook.
errors? Remember, spell checkers wont catch
everything. Thanks,
Michelle
Are all names and titles spelled correctly?
As you can see, this email doesnt communicate
Bad Example its point very well. Where is Michelles feedback on
Hi Daniel, Tracis report? She started to mention it, but then
she changed the topic to Fridays meeting.
Thanks so much for meeting me at lunch today! I
enjoyed our conservation, and Im looking forward to Good Example
moving ahead on our project. Im sure that the two- Hi Traci,
weak deadline wont be an issue.
I wanted to write you a quick note about the report
Thanks again, and Ill speak to you soon! you finished last week. I gave it to Michelle to proof,
Best, and she let me know that there are a few changes
that youll need to make. Shell email you her detailed
Jack Miller
comments later this afternoon.
If you read that example fast, then you might not
Thanks,
have caught any errors. But on closer inspection,
youll find two. Can you see them? Michelle

The first error is that the writer accidentally typed Notice that in the good example, Michelle does
conservation instead of conversation. This common not mention Fridays meeting. This is because the
error can happen when youre typing too fast. The meeting reminder should be an entirely separate
other error is using weak instead of week. email. This way, Traci can delete the report feedback
email after she makes her changes, but save the
Again, spell checkers wont catch word errors like email about the meeting as her reminder to attend.
this, which is why its so important to proofread Each email has only one main topic.
everything!
6. Complete
5. Coherent In a complete message, the audience has everything
When your communication is coherent, its logical. they need to be informed and, if applicable, take
All points are connected and relevant to the action.
main topic, and the tone and flow of the text is
Does your message include a call to action,
consistent.
so that your audience clearly knows what you
Bad Example want them to do?

Traci, Have you included all relevant information

contact names, dates, times, locations, and so
I wanted to write you a quick note about the report on?

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Bad Example Well, thats hardly courteous! Messages like this can
potentially start officewide fights. And this email
Hi everyone, does nothing but create bad feelings, and lower
I just wanted to send you all a reminder about the productivity and morale. A little bit of courtesy,
meeting were having tomorrow! even in difficult situations, can go a long way.
See you then, Good Example
Chris Hi Jeff,
This message is not complete, for obvious reasons. I wanted to write you a quick note to ask a favor. During
What meeting? When is it? Where? Chris has left his our weekly meetings, your team does an excellent job
team without the necessary information. of highlighting their progress. But this uses some of
Good Example the time available for my team to highlight theirs. Id
really appreciate it if you could give my team a little
Hi everyone, extra time each week to fully cover their progress
I just wanted to remind you about tomorrows meeting reports.
on the new telecommuting policies. The meeting will Thanks so much, and please let me know if theres
be at 10:00 a.m. in the second-level conference room. anything I can do for you!
Please let me know if you cant attend.
Best,
See you then,
Phil
Chris
What a difference! This email is courteous and
7. Courteous friendly, and it has little chance of spreading bad
feelings around the office.
Courteous communication is friendly, open, and
honest. There are no hidden insults or passive-
aggressive tones. You keep your readers viewpoint
in mind, and youre empathetic to their needs. Variations

Bad Example There are a few variations of the 7 Cs of

Communication:
Jeff,
I wanted to let you know that I dont appreciate how Credible Does your message
your team always monopolizes the discussion at our improve or highlight your credibility?
weekly meetings. I have a lot of projects, and I really This is especially important when
need time to get my teams progress discussed as well. communicating with an audience that
So far, thanks to your department, I havent been able doesnt know much about you.
to do that. Can you make sure they make time for me Creative Does your message
and my team next week? communicate creatively? Creative
Thanks, communication helps keep your
audience engaged.
Phil

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Making a Great First you and your appearance is usually the first clue he
or she has to go on.
Impression!
But it certainly does not mean you need to look
It takes just a quick glance, maybe three seconds, for like a model to create a strong and positive first
someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first impression. (Unless you are interviewing with your
time. In this short time, the other person forms an local model agency, of course!)
opinion about you based on your appearance, your
body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms, No. The key to a good impression is to present
and how you are dressed. yourself appropriately.

With every new encounter, you are evaluated and They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and so
yet another persons impression of you is formed. the picture you first present says much about you
These first impression can be nearly impossible to the person you are meeting. Is your appearance
to reverse or undo, making those first encounters saying the right things to help create the right first
extremely important, for they set the tone for all impression?
the relationships that follows. Start with the way you dress. What is the appropriate
So, whether they are in your career or social life, dress for the meeting or occasion? In a business
its important to know how to create a good first setting, what is the appropriate business attire? Suit,
impression. This article provides some useful tips to blazer, casual? And ask yourself what the person
help you do this. youll be meeting is likely to wear if your contact
is in advertising or the music industry, a pinstripe
Be on Time business suit may not strike the right note!
Someone you are meeting for the first time is For business and social meetings, appropriate dress
not interested in your good excuse for running also varies between countries and cultures, so its
late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. And allow something that you should pay particular attention
flexibility for possible delays in traffic or taking to when in an unfamiliar setting or country. Make
a wrong turn. Arriving early is much better that sure you know the traditions and norms.
arriving late, hands down, and is the first step in
creating a great first impression.
Be Yourself, Be at Ease
If you are feeling uncomfortable and on edge, this
can make the other person ill at ease and thats a
sure way to create the wrong impression. If you are
calm and confident, so the other person will feel
more at ease, and so have a solid foundation for
making that first impression a good one.
Present Yourself Appropriately
Of course physical appearance matters. The person
you are meeting for the first time does not know

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Communication Skills Training Tools

And what about your grooming? Clean and tidy handshake. All of this will help you project
appearance is appropriate for most business and confidence and encourage both you and the other
social occasions. A good haircut or shave. Clean person to feel better at ease.
and tidy clothes. Neat and tidy make up. Make sure
your grooming is appropriate and helps make you Almost everyone gets a little nervous when
feel the part. meeting someone for the first time, which can lead
to nervous habits or sweaty palms. By being aware
Appropriate dressing and grooming help make a of your nervous habits, you can try to keep them in
good first impression and also help you feel the check. And controlling a nervous jitter or a nervous
part, and so feel more calm and confident. Add all laugh will give you confidence and help the other
of this up and you are well on your way to creating person feel at ease.
a good first impression.
Small Talk Goes A Long Way
A Word about Individuality Conversations are based on verbal give and take. It
The good news is you can usually create a good may help you to prepare questions you have for the
impression without total conformity or losing your person you are meeting for the first time beforehand.
individuality. Yes, to make a good first impression Or, take a few minutes to learn something about
you do need to fit in to some degree. But it all goes the person you meet for the first time before you
back to being appropriate for the situation. If in a get together. For instance, does he play golf? Does
business setting, wear appropriate business attire. she work with a local charitable foundation?
If at a formal evening social event, wear appropriate Is there anything that you know of that you have
evening attire. And express your individuality in common with the person you are meeting? If so,
appropriately within that context. this can be a great way to open the conversation
A Winning Smile! and to keep it flowing.

Smile and the world smiles too.* So theres nothing Be Positive

like a smile to create a good first impression. A warm Your attitude shows through in everything you
and confident smile will put both you and the other do. Project a positive attitude, even in the face of
person at ease. So smiling is a winner when it comes criticism or in the case of nervousness. Strive to learn
to great first impressions. But dont go overboard with from your meeting and to contribute appropriately,
this people who take this too far can seem insincere maintaining an upbeat manner and a smile.
and smarmy, or can be seen to be lightweights.
(*Author Unknown) Be Courteous And Attentive
It goes without saying that good manners and
Be Open and Confident
polite, attentive and courteous behavior help make
When it comes to making the first impression, a good first impression. In fact, anything less can
body language as well as appearance speaks much ruin the one chance you have at making that first
louder than words. impression. So be on your best behavior!

Use your body language to project appropriate One modern manner worth mentioning is turn
confidence and self-assurance. Stand tall, smile off your mobile phone. What first impression will
(of course), make eye contact, greet with a firm you create if you are already speaking to someone

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Communication Skills Training Tools

other than the person you are meeting for the first Negotiation and Problem Solving: chunking up
time? Your new acquaintance deserves 100% of to a general level to find common ground with the
your attention. Anything less and youll create a less other person, and then chunking back down to find
than good first impression. a solution.
Key Points Creative Thinking: chunking up helps you break
out of routine thinking to identify alternatives, then
You have just a few seconds to make a good first you can chunk back down to find specific solutions
impression and its almost impossible ever to you may not have thought about before.
change it. So its worth giving each new encounter
your best shot. Much of what you need to do to Improving Motivation: if the other person seems
make a good impression is common sense. But with bored or uninspired you can chunk up to find an
a little extra thought and preparation, you can hone area of common interest or a common goal. Once
your intuitive style and make every first impression you identify the big picture, it is often easier for
not just good but great. people to see how their efforts can influence events,
and how they can contribute even more.
Another way of thinking about finding the right Overcoming stress: When someone is
level of detail is to borrow some terminology overwhelmed, it is often because the task at
commonly used in Neuro-Linguistic Programming hand seems too large. By chunking down, you
(NLP): here the terms chunking up and chunking break the job into manageable bites. If people
down are used to describe the process of moving are overwhelmed by details, do the opposite and
between levels of detail: chunk up in order to help them see what they are
Chunking Up - moving from something specific trying to accomplish.
and becoming more general
Chunking Down - moving from something
general and becoming more specific
The idea is that any issue can be seen in larger or
smaller chunks. When you move from a narrow
perspective through to a broader one, and then
back down again, different opportunities present
themselves. Chunking, in this context, enables you
to work through a discussion of issues and problems
by reorganizing (rechunking) the information.
Finding the right level of detail means moving
between the levels in a structured and logical way.
In a conversation, you can do this in direct response
the other persons need, depending on what they
say or ask during the conversation.
Applications of chunking to find the right level of
detail include:

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Body Language First Impressions and Confidence

Understanding non-verbal Recall a time when you met someone new at work.
communication As they walked through the door, what were your
first impressions? Or think about the last time you
Have you ever been in the situation when you really
watched a speaker deliver a presentation.
didnt believe what someone was saying? Did you
have a sense that something didnt ring true or a What were your impressions? Did you sense
gut feeling that all was not right? Perhaps they were confidence or a lack of confidence in them? Did
saying Yes yet their heads were shaking No? you want to associate with them or not? Were you
convinced by them?
The difference between the words people speak and
our understanding of what they are saying comes Did they stride into the room, engage you and
from non-verbal communication, otherwise known maintain eye contact or were they tentative,
as body language. By developing your awareness shuffling towards you with eyes averted before
of the signs and signals of body language, you can sliding into a chair? What about their handshake
more easily understand other people, and more firm and strong or weak and limp?
effectively communicate with them.
Moving along in the conversation, did they
There are sometimes subtle and sometimes not maintain solid eye contact or were they frequently
so subtle movements, gestures, facial expressions looking away? Did their face appear relaxed or was
and even shifts in our whole bodies that indicate it tight and tense? What about their hand and arm
something is going on. The way we talk, walk, sit movements? Were their gestures wide, flowing and
and stand all say something about us, and whatever open or were they tight, jerky and closed?
is happening on the inside can be reflected on the
outside. As you observe others, you can identify some
common signs and signals that give away whether
By becoming more aware of this body language and they are feeling confident or not. Typical things to
understanding what it might mean, you can learn look for in confident people include:
to read people more easily. This puts you in a better
position to communicate effectively with them. Posture standing tall with shoulders back.
Whats more, by increasing your understanding of Eye contact solid with a smiling face.
others, you can also become more aware of the
messages that you convey to them. Gestures with hands and arms purposeful and
deliberate.
There are times when we send mixed messages
we say one thing yet our body language reveals Speech slow and clear.
something different. This non-verbal language will
Tone of voice moderate to low.
affect how we act and react to others, and how they
react to us. As well as deciphering other peoples the body
language, you can use this knowledge to convey
This tool will explain many of the ways in which
feelings that youre not actually experiencing.
we communicate non-verbally, so that you can
use these signs and signals to communicate more For example, if you are about to enter into a situation
effectively. where you are not as confident as youd like to be,

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Communication Skills Training Tools

such as giving a big presentation or attending an into a negotiating situation, you can monitor your
important meeting, you can adopt theseconfidence own body language to ensure that the messages
signs and signals to project confidence. you are conveying are ones that say that you are
open and receptive to what is being discussed.
Lets now look at another scenario.
Working with Groups and Disengagement
Difficult Meetings and Defensiveness
Have you ever delivered a presentation and had a
Think of a time when you were in a difficult meeting sense that people werent really buying into what
perhaps a performance appraisal or one where you had to say? What about working with a group
you are negotiating deadlines, responsibilities or a to facilitate a consensus on responsibilities and
contract. In an ideal world, both you and the other deadlines? Was everyone on board with the ideas,
person would be open and receptive to hearing or did some appear disengaged?
what each other has to say in order to conclude the
meeting successfully. Ideally, when you stand up to deliver a presentation
or work with group, you want 100% engagement
However, often, the other person is defensive and with all concerned. This often doesnt happen on
doesnt really listen. If this happens during an its own, though. But you can actively engage the
appraisal meeting, and its important for you to audience when you need to if youre alert to some
convey to your colleague that they need to change of the typical signs and signals of people not being
certain behaviors, you really want them open and engaged. Some of these signs and signals include:
receptive to you so they take on board what you
are saying. Heads are down.
So how can you tell whether your message is falling Eyes are glazed, or gazing at something else.
on deaf ears?
Hands may be picking at cloths, or fiddling with
Some of the common signs that the person you are pens.
speaking with may be feeling defensive include:
People may be writing or doodling.
Hand/arm gestures are small and close to his or
her body. They may be sitting slumped in their chairs.

Facial expressions are minimal. When you pick up that someone appears not to be
engaged in what is going on, you can do something
Body is physically turned away from you. to re-engage him or her and bring their focus back
to what you are saying, such as asking them a direct
Arms are crossed in front of body. question.
Eyes maintain little contact, or are downcast. And while this is going on, make sure that your own
By picking up these signs, you can change what body language is saying what you want it to.
you say or how you say it to help the other person
become more at ease, and more receptive to what
Lying
you are saying. Of all the non-verbal body language that we may
observe, being able to tell whether a person is lying
Equally, if you are feeling somewhat defensive going
or not will stand you in good stead.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Some of the typical signs and signals that a person taking time to think about the answer, or you could
is lying include: take a moment to reflect before answering. By
taking some time to reflect on your response, you
Eyes maintain little or no eye contact, or there are indicating to the questioner that theyve asked
may be rapid eye movements, with pupils you a good question and it is important enough for
constricted. you to take some time to consider your answer.
Hand or fingers are in front of his or her mouth Be that in an interview situation or negotiating
when speaking. something with someone, showing that you are
His or her body is physically turned away from indeed thinking over your answer is a positive
you, or there are unusual/un-natural body thing. Some typical signs and signals that a person
gestures. is reflecting on their answer include:

His or her breathing rate increases. Eyes look away and return to engage contact
only when answering.
Complexion changes such as in color; red in
face or neck area. Finger stroking on chin.

Perspiration increases. Hand to cheek.

Voice changes such as change in pitch, Head tilted with eyes looking up.
stammering, throat clearing. So, whether you are on the receiving end of someone
As with all non-verbal language, its important to pondering, or you are doing the pondering, there
remember here that everyones personal body are certain gestures that give it away.
language is slightly different. If you notice some of
the typical non-verbal signs of lying, you shouldnt
One Size Does NOT Fit All
necessarily jump to conclusions, as many of these We mentioned earlier that each person is unique,
signals can be confused with the appearance of and that their signs and signals might have a
nervousness. What you should do, however, is use different underlying cause from the ones you
these signals as a prompt to probe further, ask more suspect. This is often the case when people
questions and explore the area in more detail to have different past experiences, and particularly
determine whether they are being truthful or not. where cultural differences are large. This is why
its important to check that your interpretation of
Further clarification is always worthwhile when
someone elses body language is correct. You might
checking out your understanding of someones
do this through the use of further questions, or
body language, and this is particularly true during
simply by getting to know the person better.
job interviews and in negotiating situations.
To help practice and further develop your skill
Interviews/Negotiation, and Reflection in picking up body language, engage in people-
What do you do when you are asked a really good watching. By observing people be that on a bus/
question and you ponder for a few moments before train or on television without the sound, just notice
answering? how people act and react to each other. When you
observe others, try to guess what they are saying or
You might simply blurt something out without get a sense of what is going on between them.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Even if you do not get the chance to check whether

you are correct in your assessment, you will be
developing your observational skills. This in turn
can help you to pick up signals when you are
interacting with others.
Tip:
As well as learning to read body language,
people often consciously use it to project
messages and reinforce what theyre saying
we can all call to mind the body language used
by a slippery used-car salesman.
Whether or not this is acceptable depends on
the situation. Its fine to put on a brave face
when youre about to meet someone or do
a presentation. However, its not acceptable
if youre trying to persuade someone to do
something thats against their interests whats
more, the gestures you cant control may give
you away, leading to a serious loss of trust and
credibility.

Key Points:
Body language impacts a great deal of how we
communicate, and can reflect quite accurately
whats going on inside us.
Body language includes body movements and
gestures (legs, arms, hands, head and torso), posture,
muscle tension, eye contact, skin coloring (flushed
red), even peoples breathing rate and perspiration.
Additionally, the tone of voice, the rate of speech
and the pitch of the voice all add to the words that
are being said.
It is important to recognize that body language may
vary between individuals, and between different
cultures and nationalities. It is therefore essential to
verify and confirm the signals that you are reading,
by questioning the individual and getting to know
the person.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication Skills Training Tools

Mehrabians Communication For example, he used the word maybe to test how
well people could judge the feelings of others. As
Model a word, maybe was considered to be neutral in
Learning to Communicate Clearly meaning. It was then read to participants using a
positive, neutral, and negative tone of voice, and
Have you ever opened an email from a colleague listeners had to judge the attitude of the speaker,
and misinterpreted the words on the screen? based primarily on their tone of voice.
Perhaps you felt the message was critical of you
or your work, when in fact that wasnt what the The study allowed Mehrabian to consider the
writer intended at all. Or, maybe youve had the relative importance of three elements in our
experience of speaking with a client over the phone communication: words, tone of voice, and facial
and knowing, just from their tone of voice, that expression. He wanted to discover which carried
youre not going to get the sale this time. the most weight in order to know whether we
listen more to what people say, or to how theyre
Communication is made up of more than just the saying it.
words we use. Our tone of voice, facial expression
and body language all play a major role in how When his research was complete, Mehrabian
were understood. And if were communicating in a concluded that, in situations dealing with feelings
situation where we cant use all of these elements to and attitudes, facial expression was the most
enhance our messages, we need to be very careful. significant element, followed by tone of voice.
The actual words spoken were least important for
You might well have heard the popular statistic communication.
that only 7% of any message is conveyed through
the words you choose. The other 93% is allegedly As part of his work, Mehrabian, also studied the
found in subtle clues like your tone of voice and effects of inconsistent communication, where a
body language. This claim stems from a study done particular facial expression or tone of voice was
by psychologist Albert Mehrabian in the late Sixties. clearly at odds with the words being used. So, when
But beware, its all too often misquoted! there is incongruence in this way, what will people
actually pay most attention to? Do they respond to
In this article well explain what Mehrabians words, tone of voice, or body language? Mehrabian
Communication Model really says, and look at how once again deduced that people will respond
you can use its findings in your everyday life. to body language and voice tone over verbal, or
word, choice. For instance, if the words Go away!
Mehrabians Communication Model are said with a positive vocal tone (even though the
In 1967, in a study titled Inference of Attitudes meaning itself is negative), the listener will likely
from Nonverbal Communication in Two Channels, interpret the experience as a whole as positive.
psychologist Albert Mehrabian revealed
Using his overall findings, Mehrabian created this
groundbreaking new data, relating to the relative
formula for the relative importance of the different
importance of verbal and non-verbal messages.
components of communication about emotions or
In his original study, Mehrabian considered attitudes:
different combinations of positive, neutral and
Total Emotion/Attitude Communicated = 7% Verbal
negative attitude, as expressed through both
+ 38% Vocal + 55% Facial
facial expression and tone of voice.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

language and facial expression is so important when

Often Misquoted expressing your feelings about their performance,
Since its publication, Mehrabians study has you know that relaying this feedback in person
become very well known, both in communication (versus email or over the phone) will increase the
literature and the popular media. But its all too odds that no undue offense is taken. Youll be able
often misquoted and misinterpreted. to get across your true intentions and message
more clearly if you can use both facial expression
The misinterpretation occurs when people assume and vocal tone. (Youll also be able to see your
that his formula applies to all communication colleagues reaction immediately, and, if necessary,
situations. But Mehrabian clarifies on his website adjust your message appropriately.)
that his study dealt only with with communications
involving feelings and attitudes. He states that Mehrabians model can also be applied in meetings.
Unless a communicator is talking about their Imagine youre giving a presentation about a project
feelings or attitudes, these equations are not you care about deeply. As you speak about your
applicable. commitment to the project, your body language
and facial expressions are going to relay your
How to Use the Model: genuine emotions far more than the words youre
speaking. If your audience needs convincing, the
So, how can you correctly apply Mehrabians
way you deliver your message will be critical.
Communication Model to your life?
The model can also be useful in interviews. When
Knowing about the model can be useful in email
youre speaking with a particular candidate, pay
communications when youre relaying sensitive or
close attention to how they answer emotionally
emotional information. In these situations, without
charged questions. For instance, What excites you
input from facial expression or tone of voice, youll
about the possibility of working for this company?
need to take extra care choosing the words in your
would be a good one. Their facial expression and
message. Without the non-verbal clues, words and
vocal tone should let you know if theyre truly
meaning can easily be misinterpreted. (This is why
interested in becoming part of the team, or if theyre
emoticons are so useful when youre writing an in
just after a paycheck.
informal email!)
Its also useful for telephone conversations. Key Points:
Remember that without facial cues, your tone of Mehrabians Communication Model helps us to be
voice and word choice will have more impact. Be aware that our facial expressions and tone of voice
aware of your tone when youre speaking, and be are more important in conveying an emotional
sensitive about the words youre using. in particular, message that the words were actually saying. But
make sure theyre matching your actual intention it only applies when youre talking about feelings
and message. This is, of course, particularly and attitudes.
important when youre speaking about emotional
issues! In sensitive situations, its important to remember
that your facial expressions and vocal tone are
You can use the model to guide your actions. For carrying more weight than your words. Keeping this
instance, imagine that you need to give some not- in mind, you can regulate your behavior to minimize
so-pleasant feedback to a colleague. Because body miscommunication and misunderstanding

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Assertiveness Assertiveness is not necessarily easy, but it is a skill

that can be learned. Developing your assertiveness
Do you consider yourself to be assertive? And what starts with a good understanding of who you are
does being assertive mean to you? Does it mean and a belief in the value you bring. When you
exercising your rights all the time, every time? Or have that, you have the basis of self-confidence.
does it mean knowing when to let someone else Assertiveness helps to build on that self-confidence
or some other cause or outcome take precedence and provides many other benefits for improving
over your rights? Is the boss who places a pile of your relationships at work and in other areas of
work on an employees desk the afternoon before your life as well. In general, assertive people:
that employee goes on vacation, being assertive? Get to win-win more easily they see the value
Or, is the employee who is about to go on vacation in their opponent and in his/her position, and
being assertive when she tells the boss that the can quickly find common ground.
work will be done upon her return.
Are better problem solvers they feel
Its not always easy to identify truly assertive empowered to do whatever it takes to find the
behavior. This is because there is a fine line between best solution.
assertiveness and aggression. Some definitions are
helpful when trying to separate the two: Are less stressed they know they have
personal power and they dont feel threatened
Assertiveness is based on balance. It requires being or victimized when things dont go as planned
forthright about your wants and needs while still or expected.
considering the rights, needs, and wants of others.
Are doers they get things done because they
When you are assertive, you ask for what you want
know they can.
but you dont necessarily get it.
When you act assertively you act fairly and with
Aggressive behavior is based on winning. It requires
empathy. The power you use comes from your self-
that you do what is in your own best interest without assurance and not from intimidation or bullying.
regard for the rights, needs, feelings or desires of When you treat others with such fairness and
others. When you are aggressive, you take what respect, you get that same treatment in return. You
you want regardless, and you dont usually ask. are well liked and people see you as a leader and
So, that boss was being aggressive. Yes, he had work someone they want to work with.
that needed to be done. However, by dumping it Developing Your Assertiveness
on his employee at such an inappropriate time,
he showed a total lack of regard for the needs and Some people are naturally more assertive than
feeling of his employee. others. If your disposition tends more towards being
either passive or aggressive, you need to work on
The employee on the other hand, demonstrated the following skills to develop your assertiveness.
assertive behavior when she informed her boss
that the work would be done, but it would be done Value yourself and your rights
after she returned from vacation. She asserted her Understand that your rights, thoughts, feelings,
rights while recognizing her boss need to get the needs and desires are just as important as
job done. everyone elses.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

But remember they are not more important Receive criticism and compliments positively
than anyone elses, either.
Accept compliments graciously.
Recognise your rights and protect them.
Allow yourself to make mistakes and ask for
Believe you deserve to be treated with respect help.
and dignity at all times.
Accept feedback positively be prepared to
Stop apologizing for everything. say you dont agree but do not get defensive or
angry.
Identify your needs and wants, and ask for them
to be satisfied. Learn to say No when you need to. This is the
granddaddy of assertiveness!
Dont wait for someone to recognize what you
need (you might wait forever!) Know your limits and what will cause you to feel
taken advantage of.
Understand that to perform to your full
potential, your needs must be met. Know that you cant do everything or please
everyone and learn to be OK with that.
Find ways to get your needs met without
sacrificing others needs in the process. Go with what is right for you.

Acknowledge that people are responsible for Suggest an alternative for a win-win solution.
their own behavior.
Assertive Communication Techniques
Dont make the mistake of accepting
responsibility for the how people react to your There are a variety of ways to communicate
assertive statements (e.g. anger, resentment). assertively. By understanding how to be assertive,
You can only control yourself. you can quickly adapt these techniques to any
situation you are facing.
As long as you are not violating someone elses
needs, then you have the right to say or do what I statements
you want.
Use I want, I need or I feel to convey basic
Express negative thoughts and feelings in a assertions.
healthy and positive manner. I feel strongly that we need to bring in a third party to
mediate this disagreement.
Allow yourself to be angry, but always be
respectful. Empathic Assertion
Do say whats on your mind, but do it in a way First, recognize how the other person views the
that protects the other persons feelings. situation:
Control your emotions. I understand you are having trouble working with
Arlene
Stand up for yourself and confront people who
challenge you and/or your rights. Then, express what you need:

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Communication Skills Training Tools

however, this project needs to be completed by During the conversation, keep restating your
Friday. Lets all sit down and come up with a plan to message using the same language over and over
get it done. again. Dont relent. Eventually the person is likely to
realize that you really mean what you are saying.
Escalating Assertion
I would like you to work on the Clancy project.
This type of assertiveness is necessary when your
first attempts are not successful in getting your I cannot take on any more projects right now.
needs met.
Ill pay extra for you accommodating me.
The technique involves getting more and more
I cannot take on any more projects right now.
firm as time goes on. It may end in you telling the
person what you will do next if you do not receive Seriously, this is really important, my boss insists
satisfaction. Remember though, regardless of the this gets done.
consequences you give, you may not get what you
want in the end. I cannot take on any more projects right now.

John, this is the third time this week Ive had to Will you do it as a personal favor?
speak to you about arriving late. If you are late one Im sorry, I value our past relationship but I simply
more time this month, I will activate the disciplinary cannot take on any more projects right now.
process.

Ask For More Time Tip:

Sometimes, you just need to put off saying anything. Be careful with the broken record technique. If
You might be too emotional or you might really you use it to protect yourself from exploitation,
not know what you want. Be honest and tell the thats good. However if you use it to bully
person you need a few minutes to compose your someone into taking action thats against their
thoughts. interests, its manipulative, dishonest and bad.
Dave, your request has caught me off guard. Ill get
back to you within the half hour.

Change Your Verbs

Use wont instead of cant
Use want instead of need
Use choose to instead of have to
Use could instead of should.

Broken Record
Prepare ahead of time the message you want to
convey: I cannot take on any more projects right
now.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Scripting Key Points

This technique involves preparing your responses Being assertive means knowing where the fine line
using a four-pronged approach that describes: is between assertion and aggression and balancing
on it. It means having a strong sense of yourself and
1. The event: tell the other person exactly how acknowledging that you deserve to get what you
you see the situation or problem. want. And it means standing up for yourself even in
Jacob, the production costs this month are 23% higher the most difficult situations.
than average. You didnt give me any indication of Assertiveness can be learned and developed, and
this, which meant that I was completely surprised by although it wont happen overnight, by practicing
the news. the techniques presented here you will slowly
2. Your feelings: describe how you feel about become more confident in expressing your needs
express your emotions clearly. and wants. As your assertiveness improves, so will
your productivity and efficiency. Start today and
This frustrates me and makes me feel like you dont begin to see how being assertive allows you to work
understand or appreciate how important financial with people to accomplish tasks, solve problems,
controls are in the company. and reach solutions.
3. Your needs: tell the other person what you
need so they dont have to guess.
I need you to be honest with me and let me know
when we start going
significantly over budget on
anything.
4. The consequences:
describe the positive
outcome if you needs are
fulfilled.
Im here to help you and
support you in any way I
can. If you trust me, then
together we can turn this
around.
Once you are clear about
what you want to say and
express, it is much easier to
actually do it.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Giving Feedback Giving Feedback Effectively

Employees and managers the world over dread Number One Rule: Try to Make it a Positive
this ritual and therein lays the main problem: We Process and Experience
have institutionalized the giving and receiving of
feedback. We save up our comments and document Before giving feedback make sure you remind
all the things we note about a persons performance. yourself why you are doing it. The purpose for
And then, like a big cat ready to pounce, the giving feedback is to improve the situation or
manager brings a hapless employee into the office performance. You wont accomplish that by being
and springs a years worth of constructive criticism harsh, critical, or offensive.
onto him or her. Thats not to say you must always be positive. There
is a role for negativity and even anger if someone
No doubt the process is seen as unnerving and fear
isnt paying sufficient attention to what youre
provoking. And this is exactly the wrong emotional
saying. However this should be used sparingly. Youll
environment in which to discuss performance,
most often get much more from people when your
introduce suggestions for improvement, and talk approach is positive and focused on improvement.
about goals for the future. This is a shame, because
giving and receiving feedback is some of the most Be Timely
important communication you can engage in with
The closer to the event you address the issue, the
members of your team.
better. Feedback isnt about surprising someone so
When done in the right way and with the right the sooner you do it, the more the person will be
intentions, feedback communication is the avenue expecting it.
to performance greatness. Employees have to
Think of it this way: Its much easier to feed back
know what they are doing well and not so well. For about a single one-hour job that hasnt been done
them to really hear your thoughts and suggestions properly than it is to feed back about a whole year
on ways to improve, though, that feedback has to of failed one-hour jobs.
be delivered carefully and frequently.
Tip:
Giving feedback effectively is a skill. And like all
skills, it takes practice to build your confidence and The exception to this is if the situation involved is
improve. The following is a collection of feedback highly emotional. Here, wait until everyone has
giving tips that you can start putting into practice calmed down before you engage in feedback.
today. You cant risk letting yourself get worked up and
Tip: risk saying something you will regret later.

Make it Regular
We talk generally about feedback between a Feedback is a process that requires constant
manager/supervisor and employee. However, attention. When something needs to be said, say it.
feedback can, and should, be given up, down, People then know where they stand all the time and
and laterally. The same principles apply. there are few surprises. Also, problems dont get out
of hand. This is not a once-a-year or a once-every-

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three-month event. While this may be the timing of Give the feedback from your perspective. This way
formal feedback, informal, simple feedback should you avoid labeling the person.
be given much more often than this perhaps
every week or even every day, depending on the Say, I was angry and hurt when you criticized my
situation. report in front of my boss rather than You were
insensitive yesterday.
With frequent informal feedback like this, nothing
said during formal feedback sessions should be Limit Your Focus
unexpected, surprising or particularly difficult. A feedback session should discuss no more than
Prepare Your Comments two issues. Any more than that and you risk the
person feeling attacked and demoralized.
You dont want to read a script but you do need to
be clear about you are going to say. This helps you You should also stick to behaviors the person can
stay on track and stick to the issues. actually change or influence.

Be Specific Talk about Positives Too

Tell the person exactly what they need to improve A good rule is start off with something positive. This
on. This ensures that you stick to facts and there helps put the person at ease. It also lets them see
is less room for ambiguity. If you tell someone what success looks like and this helps them to take
they acted unprofessionally, what does that mean the right steps next time.
exactly? Were they too loud, too friendly, too casual, As long as its not forced, it can also help to give
too flip or too poorly dressed? positive feedback at the end of a feedback
Remember to stick to what you know first hand: session too. Otherwise, people can finish feeling
Youll quickly find yourself on shaky ground if you despondent and worthless.
start giving feedback based on other peoples Tip:
views.
Many people can tend to overdo this and they
Tip: end up sandwiching the constructive feedback
Try not to exaggerate to make a point. Avoid between too many positives. Then the takeaway
words like never, all, and always because message becomes, Gee, Im doing really well
the person will get defensive. Always discuss instead of Im good at communicating with
the direct impact of the behavior and dont get customers, but I need to bring my interpersonal
personal or seek to blame. skills with my co-workers up to that same level.

Criticize in Private Provide Specific Suggestions

While public recognition is appreciated, public Make sure you both know what needs to be done
scrutiny is not. to improve the situation. The main message should
be that you care and want to help the person grow
Establish a safe place to talk where you wont be and develop. Set goals and make plans to monitor
interrupted or overheard. and evaluate progress. Use the SMART acronym and
define specific steps and milestones, or the GROW
Use I Statements

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Communication Skills Training Tools

model to motivate people to deliver the change become at it. It may never be your favorite means
you want. of communicating with employees, co-workers,
or bosses but it does have the potential to make
Tip: your workplace a much more productive and
You may not agree on everything so it is a harmonious place to be.
good idea to ask the person to provide their
perspective. Use phrases like, What is your
reaction to this? or Is this a fair representation
of what happened? Listen actively to what he or
she has to say and try to get him or her to offer
some suggestions for improvement. This way
they have an opportunity to own the solution
and are much more likely to follow through
with it. To avoid sounding like youre preaching,
stay away from words like good, bad, must,
need to, etc.

Follow Up
The whole purpose of feedback is to improve
performance. You need to measure whether or not Getting Feedback
that is happening and then make adjustments as
you go. Be sure to document your conversations The leader of the past was a person who knew how
and discuss what is working and what needs to be to tell. The leader of the future will be the person
modified. who knows how to ask. - Pete Drucker, author and
Tip: consultant.

Its also important that you actively seek Its time for Scotts performance review he walks
feedback from your boss, colleagues, and in confidently, and hes expecting praise for the
customers. hard work that hes been putting in.
However, hes devastated when his boss starts
Key Points criticizing the quality of his work. Not only is
she unhappy with Scotts performance, but
Feedback is a two way street. You need to know how
shes also considering taking away some of his
to give it effectively and at the same time model
responsibilities.
how to receive it constructively.
Although this might sound like a drastic scenario,
When you make a conscious choice to give
situations like this are more common than you
and receive feedback on a regular basis you
might think.
demonstrate that feedback is a powerful means of
personal development. Done properly, feedback After all, if your boss or your clients were unhappy
need not be agonizing, demoralizing, or daunting with your work, theyd tell you, right? Well, not
and the more practice you get the better you will all of the time. This is why its so important to be

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Communication Skills Training Tools

proactive about soliciting feedback. In this article,

well look at how to ask for feedback, and how you
can learn from it.

Benefits of Feedback
To improve your skills and grow professionally, its
essential that you get feedback on the work that
you do. After all, you cant fix something that you
dont know is broken! In turn, your improvement
could lead to a promotion or to other opportunities
down the road. It will also raise your self-confidence,
and show your boss that you truly care about your
work. But, it takes courage to admit that youre not perfect,
and to open yourself up to hear constructive
On the other hand, not getting any feedback can comments. As such, if you ask for feedback, then
make you think that your contributions arent youve already put yourself a step above your
valued or noticed. This can make you question colleagues and competitors.
the importance of the work youre doing and your
overall competency. It can also damage your morale Who to Ask for Feedback
and self-confidence.
The most obvious person to ask for feedback is your
This is why its important for you to take the initiative boss. However, he or she isnt the only person who
in asking for feedback, especially if the people you can give you useful feedback.
need it from arent offering it on a regular basis. (For
Your colleagues will likely have some great insights
instance, some managers may only provide detailed into your performance. They probably notice things
feedback during annual performance reviews.) about your work that you and your boss might
An additional benefit is that when you ask for overlook. (You can offer to give feedback to them
feedback, you do it on your terms. Youre mentally as well.)
ready to hear the good and the bad, and youre You can also ask your customers for feedback. This
open to working hard to improve. shows them that you care about your relationship
and the work you do for them. It also gives
Overcoming a Fear of Feedback you a chance to address any issues before they
Asking for feedback can be a bit intimidating after lose confidence in you, and take their business
all, youre opening yourself up to possible criticism. elsewhere.
This can be difficult at first. Additionally, you can ask vendors and suppliers for
You can overcome this fear by adjusting your feedback any insights that improve your working
mindset. Remember that no one is perfect all of us relationships can be valuable.
make mistakes, and everyone has room to improve. Note:
In this respect, youre the same as everyone else in
your organization. It can be hard for other people to give you

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Communication Skills Training Tools

feedback, especially if its constructive criticism. wrong conclusions, then ask further questions. Its
They most likely want to help but they probably important to clarify any feedback while the person
also dont want to hurt your feelings! So do your is giving it; if you dont, youll just stew over it later,
best to put them at ease, so that they can be and perhaps jump to some incorrect conclusions
honest with you. yourself.

How to Ask for Feedback 3. Be Graceful

Well now look at how you can ask for feedback If you receive negative feedback, its tempting to
effectively: provide an excuse for your behavior or to point the
finger of blame at someone else.
1. Consider the Timing
Therefore, its important to learn how to handle
First, think about why you want feedback, so criticism with grace. Remember, you asked for this
that you can time your request appropriately. For opportunity to improve! Be open and diplomatic in
instance, do you want feedback on your general your responses, and thank the other person for his
performance, or on a specific project, task, or or her time and effort.
event?
4. Really Listen
If you need feedback on general performance, then
you can ask for it at any sensible time. However, When you receive feedback, you might instantly
if you need feedback on something specific, such start thinking of excuses to explain your behavior,
as the meeting you just led or the report you just or you might start planning what youre going to
submitted, its most helpful to ask for it right after say when the other person has finished speaking.
the event takes place. This immediacy will ensure
So, make an effort to listen in detail to the other
that you get the most accurate picture of your
person when receiving feedback. Use Active
performance.
Listening so that you get the full measure of what
2. Be Specific this person is saying.

Whenever you ask for feedback, be as specific as How to Use Feedback Effectively
possible.
Feedback is only useful when you take the next
General questions such as How am I doing? will step and actually do something with it.
most likely receive general answers. Youll get
better feedback by asking specific questions such Explore the feedback you receive before you take
as Have my weekly reports been as thorough as action on it. This will help you understand why
you want them to be? your behavior needs to change. (You may find the
Feedback Matrix useful for thinking about this.)
You can also ask for a specific action to take. For
instance, you could ask, Whats one thing I could Once you better understand the feedback, come
do, in your opinion, to improve here? up with a plan to use it. Ask yourself how youre
going to improve, and write out the steps you need
If youre unsure about why the other person to take.
is giving you a specific type of feedback, or if
you feel that person might have jumped to the This can then become an important personal goal.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

For instance, imagine your boss gave you some Feedback Matrix
useful feedback at the end of your last presentation;
she said you need to work on your presentation Susanne: Hi, thanks for meeting with me today.
manner, especially your nerves. You could make As I mentioned, I wanted to talk with you about the
this a goal, and commit to spending some time on construction plan you submitted yesterday. As usual,
it so that you can improve your presentation skills. the quality of the plan was great. You definitely know
whats expected by us and our client, so I want to
When Feedback Is Unfair thank you for that.
Some of the feedback you receive will be useful Charles: Thanks, its great to hear feedback like that.
and will motivate you to perform better. However,
some may be the opposite either unusable or Susanne: Well, Im glad you feel that way. What Im a
downright unfair. bit more concerned about, though, are the deadlines.
You know that we build in extra time between when
Unfair feedback is often harsh, personal, and you submit the plans to us and when we actually
generalized, and is likely to be more of a personal present them to the client. However, I see that you
attack than a sincere desire to help you improve. often take advantage of that extra time, and you
delay submitting your plans theyre sometimes
Key Points up to a week late. This creates a bottleneck at the
Feedback can be incredibly useful if you want engineering approval stage, and Im starting to hear
to grow, both personally and professionally. Its about it. What can I do to get you back on track, so we
important to realize that youll often need to ask for return to the more efficient process we had before?
feedback. Charles: Im really sorry. Ive been stressed at home
Be specific about what you want to know when you lately, and it doesnt help that Les, the new guy, comes
ask for feedback. Ask questions to clarify anything to me with questions all the time. Can you give me a
that youre unsure about, and be graceful as you week to focus on finishing the plan Im working on
receive the feedback. Keep in mind that its often as now? With fewer distractions and some time to work
difficult to give feedback as it is to hear it. With that out my problems, I know Ill get back on schedule.
in mind, make sure that you say thank you! Susanne: Thats seems reasonable. Thank you for
After youve received feedback, take time to being honest. Ill tell Les to ask Madeline for advice
understand the other persons comments and then and suggestions for now. Lets get together in a few
come up with a plan to improve. The information days to discuss your progress.
you receive through feedback can turn into goals This sounds like a textbook feedback exchange
that you can use to improve your career. just how its supposed to happen. Susanne
expressed her concern, Charles accepted the
feedback, they agreed upon a solution, and they
have a date for follow-up.
However, while it seems ideal, we dont know how
well it actually worked. And if the results of many
feedback sessions are any indication, there may be
less positive change than we would hope.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Have you ever been part of a conversation like - How can I celebrate this aspect of
that? Chances are that youve observed that people myself?
(possibly yourself!) do one of two things when - How can I use this skill to improve my
receiving feedback: productivity or personal satisfaction?
1. They accept the negative part of the feedback, - How can I use the skill to help others who
but try to explain it or justify it (or decide that are not as strong?
the person giving the feedback is wrong, so the
comments are dismissed entirely!) Negative/Expected If were honest with
ourselves, were often aware of some of the
2. They focus on the positive, and use it to reinforce areas in our life that need improvement. If our
what they already know to be true. boss asks for a meeting, chances are we know
and expect what will be discussed. In fact, were
In either case, the feedback often fails to achieve the often more critical of ourselves than others are,
desired result. Rather than starting the process of but we just dont know how to improve without
self-examination to understand how their behavior some help. To apply this expected feedback and
needs to change, people continue to do what they make a positive change, ask yourself:
were doing before, without making any major shift
or correction. - What actions have I already taken to
address this concern?
The Matrix
- How successful were those actions?
The feedback matrix, as shown below, is a useful tool
- What else do I need to examine and/or
that helps with self-exploration. It encourages you
change to achieve the results I want?
to examine both the positive and negative aspects
of feedback, and then connect the comments back - If I dont make these changes, how will
to what you already know about yourself, and what this impact my job or life?
you did not know and need to explore more fully. Positive/Unexpected Receiving positive
feedback that we dont expect is like a surprise
POSITIVE NEGATIVE birthday present. It creates a wonderful feeling
when we learn or hear something positive that
EXPECTED was totally unexpected. But after the initial joy,
its important to examine this feedback further
by asking yourself:
UNEXPECTED
- Why was I surprised to hear this?
Feedback generally falls into one of the categories - What previous experiences might have
in the matrix: caused me to forget or dismiss this strength
or ability?
Positive/Expected We often have a good idea
- How will I celebrate this newly discovered
of what we do well, because we receive regular
skill?
positive feedback about these things. But
instead of simply hearing this familiar praise - How can I use this skill to improve my
and doing nothing with it, ask yourself: life?

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Negative/Unexpected This feedback is the

most difficult to hear and understand. But it
can also be the source of much self-discovery,
if were open to it. This unexpected feedback
often comes from areas that we dont want to
acknowledge, or arent prepared to face, and it
can cause some strong emotions. However, when
we learn to deal with it, we can take big steps
forward on our journey of self-improvement.
Some further questions to explore include:
- What other information do I need to make
sense of the feedback?
- What support do I need to deal with the
implications?
- What plan can I put in place to make small,
achievable changes in the short term?
- How will improving this impact other
areas of my job or life?
Active Listening
Key Points
Given all this listening we do, you would think wed
Feedback is meant to be the first step toward
be good at it!
change. Unfortunately, the result is often too much
or too little change, which doesnt help you achieve In fact most of us are not. Depending on the study
your goals. being quoted, we remember between 25% and
50% of what we hear. That means that when you
The Feedback Matrix helps you get the most from
talk to your boss, colleagues, customers or spouse
any feedback session. It leads you to examine the
for 10 minutes, they pay attention to less than half
negative and positive aspects of the feedback, and
of the conversation. This is dismal!
ask yourself what you did and did not expect. It
challenges you to take advantage of the expected Turn it around and it reveals that when you are
positives, commit to working harder on the expected receiving directions or being presented with
negatives, celebrate the unexpected positives, and information, you arent hearing the whole message
fully explore the unexpected negatives. With this either. You hope the important parts are captured
tool, you can use feedback effectively to achieve in your 25 50%, but what if theyre not?
significant, positive change.
Clearly, listening is a skill that we can all benefit
from improving. By becoming a better listener,
you will improve your productivity, as well as your
ability to influence, persuade and negotiate. Whats

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Communication Skills Training Tools

more, youll avoid conflict and misunderstandings. Acknowledgement can be something as simple as
All of these are necessary for workplace success! a nod of the head or a simple uh huh. You arent
necessarily agreeing with the person, you are
Good communication skills require a high
simply indicating that you are listening. Using body
level of self-awareness. By understanding your
language and other signs to acknowledge you are
personal style of communicating, you will go
a long way towards creating good and lasting listening also reminds you to pay attention and not
impressions with others. let your mind wander.

The way to become a better listener is to practice You should also try to respond to the speaker in a
active listening. This is where you make a way that will both encourage him or her to continue
conscious effort to hear not only the words that speaking, so that you can get the information if you
another person is saying but, more importantly, try need. While nodding and uh huhing says youre
to understand the complete message being sent. interested, an occasional question or comment to
recap what has been said communicates that you
In order to do this you must pay attention to the understand the message as well.
other person very carefully.
You cannot allow yourself to become distracted by
Becoming an Active Listener
whatever else may be going on around you, or by There are five key elements of active listening. They
forming counter arguments that youll make when all help you ensure that you hear the other person,
the other person stops speaking. Nor can you allow and that the other person knows you are hearing
yourself to get bored, and lose focus on what the what they say.
other person is saying. All of these contribute to a
lack of listening and understanding. 1. Pay attention.
Give the speaker your undivided attention, and
Tip: acknowledge the message. Recognize that non-
If youre finding it particularly difficult to verbal communication also speaks loudly.
concentrate on what someone is saying, try
Look at the speaker directly.
repeating their words mentally as they say them
this will reinforce their message and help you Put aside distracting thoughts. Dont mentally
stay focused. prepare a rebuttal!
Avoid being distracted by environmental
To enhance your listening skills, you need to let the factors.
other person know that you are listening to what
he or she is saying. To understand the importance Listen to the speakers body language.
of this, ask yourself if youve ever been engaged
Refrain from side conversations when listening
in a conversation when you wondered if the other
in a group setting.
person was listening to what you were saying. You
wonder if your message is getting across, or if its 2. Show that you are listening.
even worthwhile continuing to speak. It feels like
talking to a brick wall and its something you want Use your own body language and gestures to
to avoid. convey your attention.

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Nod occasionally. 5. Respond Appropriately.

Smile and use other facial expressions. Active listening is a model for respect and
understanding. You are gaining information and
Note your posture and make sure it is open and perspective. You add nothing by attacking the
inviting. speaker or otherwise putting him or her down.
Encourage the speaker to continue with small Be candid, open, and honest in your response.
verbal comments like yes, and uh huh.
Assert your opinions respectfully.
3. Provide feedback.
Treat the other person as he or she would want
Our personal filters, assumptions, judgments, and to be treated.
beliefs can distort what we hear. As a listener, your
role is to understand what is being said. This may Key Points:
require you to reflect what is being said and ask
questions. It takes a lot of concentration and determination to
be an active listener. Old habits are hard to break,
Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing. and if your listening habits are as bad as many
What Im hearing is and Sounds like you are peoples are, then theres a lot of habit-breaking to
saying are great ways to reflect back. do!
Ask questions to clarify certain points. What Be deliberate with your listening and remind
do you mean when you say Is this what you yourself frequently that your goal is to truly hear
mean? what the other person is saying. Set aside all other
thoughts and behaviors and concentrate on the
Summarize the speakers comments
message. Ask questions, reflect, and paraphrase to
periodically.
ensure you understand the message. If you dont,
Tip: then youll find that what someone says to you and
what you hear can be amazingly different!
If you find yourself responding emotionally to
what someone said, say so, and ask for more Start using active listening today to become a
information: I may not be understanding you better communicator, improve your workplace
correctly, and I find myself taking what you said productivity, and develop better relationships.
personally. What I thought you just said is XXX;
is that what you meant?

4. Defer judgment.
Interrupting is a waste of time. It frustrates the
speaker and limits full understanding of the
message.
Allow the speaker to finish.
Dont interrupt with counter arguments.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Role Playing And by repeating the scenarios, people can

understand how different approaches might work,
Preparing for difficult so that an ideal approach can be identified.
conversations and situations
More than this, by preparing for a situation using
role-play, people build up experience and self-
Role playing is a useful technique for thinking
confidence in handling the situation in real life. They
about difficult situations before they occur, so that
develop quick and instinctively correct reactions to
you have good pre-prepared responses for the
situations, meaning that they can react effectively
different eventualities that can arise. Role-playing
as situations evolve rather than making mistakes or
can also be used to analyze problems from different
being overwhelmed by events.
perspectives, to spark brainstorming sessions, to
experiment with different solutions to a problem, How to use the tool:
to develop team work, and help group problem-
solving. To start the process, the role play leader introduces
the problem and encourages an open discussion
Role-playing happens when a group of people act in order to uncover all the relevant issues. This
out roles in a particular scenario. The scenario is also serves to get participants thinking about the
usually based on a problem that needs a solution, a problem before the role-playing begins.
situation that needs to be more closely examined,
or a case or issue that demands a different From this, participants set up a role playing scenario
perspective. in enough detail for it to feel real.

By acting the scenario through, participants can The next step is to identify the different people
pre-experience the likely reactions to different involved in the scenario. Some of these will be
approaches, and can get a feel for the approaches people from within the organization who have to
that will work and those that might be counter- deal with the situation. Others will represent people
productive. from outside the organization, and may take roles
that are supportive or hostile, depending on the
They can get a good feel for what people are likely scenario.
to be thinking and feeling in the situation.
Individual participants in the role play are allocated
the roles of each of these people, and try to put
themselves inside the minds of these people
in their imaginations. This involves trying to
understand the perspectives of these people, their
goals and motivations, and the way they are feeling
when they enter the situation.
Participants then act the situations through, trying
different approaches to resolving the problems
faced.
A useful approach is for scenarios to build up in
intensity, starting easily with all parties being well-

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disposed towards one-another. As participants get Next (with this particular approach to role play)
experience in handling these simple situations, each group sends forth an actor to role-play. The
the participants playing the roles of people from actor receives support and coaching from members
outside the organization can get increasingly hostile of his/her team throughout the entire role-playing
or difficult, testing out the correct approaches process. Each team is able to take time-outs and
for handling these situations and giving people regroup quickly as needed.
experience in handling them.
John runs through the scenario several times,
Upon completion of the role-playing, the trainer starting with the customer playing gently and
leads a discussion on the role-play and solicits ending with the customer playing extremely
written summaries of the activities from all aggressively.
involved. These can be compiled into a single brief
and distributed to participants. And each time, a best solution is found. Of course,
John can always ask for additional role-playing and
Example: additional solutions if he feels the process needs
to continue or that viable solutions have yet to be
In an effort to improve customer support, John, uncovered.
Customer Service Manager for MythcoTechnologies,
implements a team role-playing session. Acting as Once it is clear no more solutions are to be found,
the leader/trainer, John brings together a group John brings the two groups together and the role-
of software developers and customer support playing is discussed. During this discussion, John
representatives. and both teams discuss the strategies and the
solutions that were implemented and then apply
John divides the 12 colleagues into two role-playing these to the actual situation.
groups: Group 1 represents the customer support
representatives; Group 2 represents the customer. John also asks each team to write a short summary
about what they learned from the role-playing
John tells Group 1 that the customer in this situation exercise. He then combines the summaries and
is one of Mythcos longest-standing customers provides a copy of everything learned to all
and this customer accounts for nearly 15% of the participants.
companys overall annual revenue. In short, this
customer cannot be lost!
John tells Group 2 that, as the customer, they have Conflict Resolution
recently received a software product that does not
live up to its expectations. While the customer has Resolving Conflict Rationally and
a long-standing relationship with Mythco, this time Effectively
they are growing weary because what they believe
to be inferior software has been sold to them on In many cases, conflict in the workplace just seems
two separate occasions. Clearly, the relationship to be a fact of life. Weve all seen situations where
with Mythco is in jeopardy. different people with different goals and needs
have come into conflict. And weve all seen the
John now allows the groups to brainstorm for a few
often-intense personal animosity that can result.
minutes.
The fact that conflict exists, however, is not

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Communication Skills Training Tools

necessarily a bad thing: As long as it is resolved identified five main styles of dealing with conflict
effectively, it can lead to personal and professional that vary in their degrees of cooperativeness and
growth. assertiveness. They argued that people typically
have a preferred conflict resolution style. However
In many cases, effective conflict resolution can they also noted that different styles were most
make the difference between positive and negative useful in different situations. They developed the
outcomes. Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI)
The good news is that by resolving conflict which helps you to identify which style you tend
successfully, you can solve many of the problems towards when conflict arises.
that it has brought to the surface, as well as getting
benefits that you might not at first expect:
Increased understanding:The discussion needed
to resolve conflict expands peoples awareness
of the situation, giving them an insight into
how they can achieve their own goals without
undermining those of other people;
Increased group cohesion: When conflict is
resolved effectively, team members can develop
stronger mutual respect, and a renewed faith in
their ability to work together; and
Improved self-knowledge: Conflict pushes
individuals to examine their goals in close detail
Thomas and Kilmanns styles are:
, helping them understand the things that are Competitive: People who tend towards a
most important to them, sharpening their focus, competitive style take a firm stand, and know what
and enhancing their effectiveness.
they want. They usually operate from a position
However, if conflict is not handled effectively, the of power, drawn from things like position, rank,
results can be damaging. Conflicting goals can expertise, or persuasive ability. This style can be
quickly turn into personal dislike. Teamwork breaks useful when there is an emergency and a decision
down. Talent is wasted as people disengage from needs to be make fast; when the decision is
their work. And its easy to end up in a vicious unpopular; or when defending against someone
downward spiral of negativity and recrimination. who is trying to exploit the situation selfishly.
However it can leave people feeling bruised,
If youre to keep your team or organization working
effectively, you need to stop this downward spiral unsatisfied and resentful when used in less urgent
as soon as you can. To do this, it helps to understand situations.
two of the theories that lie behind effective conflict Collaborative: People tending towards a
resolution: collaborative style try to meet the needs of all people
involved. These people can be highly assertive but
Understanding the Theory: Conflict Styles unlike the competitor, they cooperate effectively
In the 1970s Kenneth Thomas and Ralph Kilmann and acknowledge that everyone is important. This

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Communication Skills Training Tools

style is useful when a you need to bring together a own instinctive approach, and learn how you need
variety of viewpoints to get the best solution; when to change this if necessary.
there have been previous conflicts in the group; or
when the situation is too important for a simple Ideally you can adopt an approach that meets the
trade-off. situation, resolves the problem, respects peoples
legitimate interests, and mends damaged working
Compromising: People who prefer a compromising relationships.
style try to find a solution that will at least partially
satisfy everyone. Everyone is expected to give up Understanding The Theory:
something, and the compromiser him- or herself The Interest-Based Relational Approach
also expects to relinquish something. Compromise
is useful when the cost of conflict is higher than The second theory is commonly referred to as
the cost of losing ground, when equal strength the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) Approach.
opponents are at a standstill and when there is a This type of conflict resolution respects individual
deadline looming. differences while helping people avoid becoming
too entrenched in a fixed position.
Accommodating: This style indicates a willingness
to meet the needs of others at the expense of the In resolving conflict using this approach, you follow
persons own needs. The accommodator often these rules:
knows when to give in to others, but can be Make sure that good relationships are the first
persuaded to surrender a position even when it is priority: As far as possible, make sure that you
not warranted. This person is not assertive but is
treat the other calmly and that you try to build
highly cooperative. Accommodation is appropriate
mutual respect. Do your best to be courteous
when the issues matter more to the other party,
to one-another and remain constructive under
when peace is more valuable than winning, or
pressure;
when you want to be in a position to collect on this
favor you gave. However people may not return Keep people and problems separate:
favors, and overall this approach is unlikely to give Recognize that in many cases the other person
the best outcomes. is not just being difficult real and valid
Avoiding: People tending towards this style seek differences can lie behind conflictive positions.
to evade the conflict entirely. This style is typified By separating the problem from the person,
by delegating controversial decisions, accepting real issues can be debated without damaging
default decisions, and not wanting to hurt anyones working relationships;
feelings. It can be appropriate when victory is
Pay attention to the interests that are being
impossible, when the controversy is trivial, or when
presented: By listening carefully youll most-
someone else is in a better position to solve the
likely understand why the person is adopting
problem. However in many situations this is a weak
and ineffective approach to take. his or her position;

Once you understand the different styles, you can Listen first; talk second: To solve a problem
use them to think about the most appropriate effectively you have to understand where the
approach (or mixture of approaches) for the other person is coming from before defending
situation youre in. You can also think about your your own position;

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Set out the Facts: Agree and establish the Restate

objective, observable elements that will have
an impact on the decision; and Paraphrase

Explore options together: Be open to the idea Summarize

that a third position may exist, and that you can And make sure that when you talk, youre using an
get to this idea jointly. adult, assertive approach rather than a submissive
By following these rules, you can often keep or aggressive style.
contentious discussions positive and constructive. Step Two: Gather Information
This helps to prevent the antagonism and dislike
which so-often causes conflict to spin out of Here you are trying to get to the underlying
control. interests, needs, and concerns. Ask for the other
persons viewpoint and confirm that you respect
Using the Tool: his or her opinion and need his or her cooperation
A Conflict Resolution Process to solve the problem.
Based on these approaches, a starting point for Try to understand his or her motivations and goals,
dealing with conflict is to identify the overriding and see how your actions may be affecting these.
conflict style employed by yourself, your team or
your organization. Also, try to understand the conflict in objective
terms: Is it affecting work performance? damaging
Over time, peoples conflict management styles the delivery to the client? disrupting team work?
tend to mesh, and a right way to solve conflict hampering decision-making? or so on. Be sure to
emerges. Its good to recognize when this style can
focus on work issues and leave personalities out of
be used effectively, however make sure that people
the discussion.
understand that different styles may suit different
situations. Listen with empathy and see the conflict from
the other persons point of view
Look at the circumstances, and think about the
style that may be appropriate. Identify issues clearly and concisely
Then use the process below to resolve the conflict: Use I statements
Step One: Set the Scene Remain flexible
Make sure that people understand that the conflict Clarify feelings
may be a mutual problem, which may be best
resolved through discussion and negotiation rather Step Three: Agree the Problem
than through raw aggression. This sounds like an obvious step, but often different
If you are involved in the conflict, emphasize the underlying needs, interests and goals can cause
fact that you are presenting your perception of people to perceive problems very differently. Youll
the problem. Use active listening skills to ensure need to agree the problems that you are trying
you hear and understand others positions and to solve before youll find a mutually acceptable
perceptions. solution.

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Communication Skills Training Tools

Sometimes different people will see different If this is done, then, as long as people listen carefully
but interlocking problems if you cant reach a and explore facts, issues and possible solutions
common perception of the problem, then at the properly, conflict can often be resolved effectively.
very least, you need to understand what the other
person sees as the problem.

Step Four: Brainstorm Possible Solutions

If everyone is going to feel satisfied with the
resolution, it will help if everyone has had fair
input in generating solutions. Brainstorm possible
solutions, and be open to all ideas, including ones
you never considered before.

Step Five: Negotiate a Solution

By this stage, the conflict may be resolved: Both
sides may better understand the position of the
other, and a mutually satisfactory solution may be
clear to all.
However you may also have uncovered real
differences between your positions. This is where a
technique like win-win negotiation can be useful to
find a solution that, at least to some extent, satisfies
everyone.
There are three guiding principles here: Be Calm,
Be Patient, Have Respect

Key Points
Conflict in the workplace can be incredibly
destructive to good teamwork.
Managed in the wrong way, real and legitimate
differences between people can quickly spiral
out of control, resulting in situations where co-
operation breaks down and the teams mission is
threatened. This is particularly the case where the
wrong approaches to conflict resolution are used.
To calm these situations down, it helps to take a
positive approach to conflict resolution, where
discussion is courteous and non-confrontational,
and the focus is on issues rather than on individuals.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication Skills Training Tools

Journal Writing Each entry should include:

Following each class, you will have time to write The date of the lesson.
up your journal entry. This is a record of what you
The topic being covered.
personally have gained from the session and what
you still want to achieve or learn in this area. You Anything you learnt from other people in the
can also write in your journal about things that class.
have happened at work or with friends that are
connected to the topics covered in the classes. What you learnt about yourself in the lesson.

Assessment Feelings/thoughts about yourself from what

you learnt
Multicultural communication is a very important
part of this course. Your tutor will want to check A re-think of your own strengths and
that you are keeping your journal regularly and you weaknesses.
may be asked to talk in general about some of the Goals and action steps for the future.
things you have written, just to make sure you are
on the right track. But your tutor will not read your
journal. It is personal - a place for you to write down
whats happening to you and what progress you
feel you are making on the course and in your life
in general.

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Communication
Learner copy 1: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Learner copy 1: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Learner copy 2: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Learner copy 2: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Learner copy 3: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 69
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Learner copy 3: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Tutor copy 1: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Tutor copy 1: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Tutor copy 2: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Tutor copy 2: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Tutor copy 3: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This publication [communication] reflects the views only of the author, 75
and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Tutor copy 3: Skills Training Tools
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
1:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
1:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
2:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
2:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
PROJECT N 510853-LLP-1-2010-1-BG-GRUNTVIG-GMP http://advalue-project.eu
Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
3:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

Learner name: Learner signature:

Tutor name: Tutor signature:
Date:
Please put an X in the appropriate box, 0 = not at all developed, 10 = very well developed

Communication
skill descriptors 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

Identify basic communication

1
principles.
Apply a communication process
2
model.
Set clear goals for their
3
communication.
4 Determine outcomes and results.
5 Initiate communications.
6 Avoid communication breakdowns.
Translate across communication
7
styles.
8 Listen for improved understanding.
9 Achieve genuine communication.
Match the body language to the
10
message.
11 Work constructively with emotions.
12 Manage verbal communication.

In each of boxes below, choose 1 of the skills above and explain in what situation you feel you have shown
the skill or give any other evidence for rating the skill as you have done.

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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Communication
Line Skills Training
manager/Mentor/Peer copyTools
3:
Communication skill descriptors scaling sheet

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and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.
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 CERTIFICATE
OF COMPLETION
THIS IS TO CERTIFY THAT

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

has completed the module

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

from ....................................................... to .......................................................

And has made particular progress in the following areas:

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

.............................................................................................................................................................................................

Signed: Date:
....................................................... .......................................................