Basic Anxiety Management Techniques
Basic Anxiety Management Techniques
Self Care/SPEMS
You may have heard of the term Self Care before. People talk about the concept of Self Care in a variety
of ways: taking some me time, hanging out with friends, getting outside for a bit. When dealing with
anxiety, however, it is important to unpack the idea of Self Care a bit more.
Self Care underlies healthy living in general, and it is particularly relevant for your mental health. For this
reason, weve put this section before all other Basic Skillsideally, you should check-in with your
current Self Care and establish new, healthy Self Care habits before attempting any other Basic Skills.
You wont become a world-class skater without first buying a pair of skatesand you wouldnt get to be
very good if those skates were made of wood! Similarly, the Basic Skills and other techniques found in
this workbook require a solid foundation; in this case the bedrock of anxiety management is Self Care.
Within this workbook we divide Self Care into five domains. These domains can be thought of as buckets
that need filling. We are at our best when our buckets are full, or nearly full, but it takes work to keep
them that way. When we are feeling low, or our anxiety is high, it may be because our buckets are low
orin some casesempty. Its important to look at all five buckets; its typical to lose sight of one or
two of the buckets every once in a while, and these are often the ones that need filling the most!
Self Care is unique to the individual. We can fill our buckets in many different ways. Because there are
so many ways to fill each bucket, something that works well for one person may not work well for
another. Many people find it easier to think about each bucket as having different taps that are able to
fill itmaybe its a hot water tap, maybe its a cold water tapbut the crucial thing is that the bucket is
getting filled, and with a fuller bucket you are more able to enjoy parts of your life. For example, if your
friends social bucket is low, they may need to hang out with other people a bit more in order to fill it
(let`s call this using the `hot water` tap). But maybe when your social bucket is low, you find it gets filled
better by getting away from social situations and giving yourself some time alone (the `cold water` tap).
Even though this may seem contradictory, remember that it is what works for you that counts. As you
read through this section, think about how your buckets have been filled in the past and how are
currently being filled (or not filled, as the case may be).Use the spaces provided to reflect on what you
currently do to fill your buckets and how effective those practices are for you. You can also find this
information in Worksheet 2.1 SPEMS: How Do You Fill Your Bucket, in Appendix B.
Below, weve listed the five different domains of Self Care and some ideas for how you can fill them.
Note that weve listed two possible taps for each of the buckets below, but you are not limited to two;
feel free to get creative! These five domains include: social, physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.
Together, they create the acronym SPEMS. Acronyms generally make things easier to remember;
however, this particular acronym is particularly appropriate because the word spem is Latin for hope!
This is fantastic, as SPEMSand Self Care in generalis meant to give you hope for a better future!
Deep Breathing
Deep breathing, diaphragmatic breathing, or box breathing are all commonly-used names for this tool in
our Anxiety Management Workbook. This tool may not be new to you, however, we hope that this
workbook will help you understand why deep breathing can be helpful for you, and how to use it to
maximize its effectiveness. The purpose of this exercise is to hit the brake pedal on stress, or activate
the parasympathetic nervous system to calm our bodys fight-or-flight response. Lets start by discussing
how to use deep breathing as an anxiety management tool.
Getting Started:
4. Begin by taking a slow, easy, mindful breath in, through your nose, gently pulling the air deep down into
your abdomen. You should feel your abdomen rise with this inhalation and your chest should only move
a little. Inhale for a count of 5.
5. Hold that breath deep in your lungs for a count of two.
6. Slowly exhale, making sure to keep your mouth, jaw, and tongue relaxed. Exhale for a count of 5-7.
Notice which hand is moving (the one on your chest, or your abdomen?). As all of the air is released with
exhalation, gently contract your abdominal muscles to completely empty your lungs of all air. It is
important to remember that we deepen our breath by completely emptying our lungs on an exhale, not
by filling them with more air on an inhale.
7. Repeat.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is non-judgmental, purposeful attention to the present moment. This may seem simple
enough, but take a moment to reflect on how often you find yourself doing some sort of mundane
activitylike having a shower or walking to classwhere you realize that you are on autopilot, a
million miles away, off in space, or just not really paying attention to what youre doing. The
countless idioms to describe our state of mind when we are not present in the moment perhaps reflect
how often we engage in this behaviour (whether were aware of it or not). Mindfulness is the exact
opposite of this; it is the act of staying present in the moment. In other words, mindfulness is the act of
keeping your mind here, in the present, instead of letting it wander.
Mindfulness is an important tool for anxiety management (and mental health, in general) because it
teaches us to observe our thoughts. Thoughts are critical in anxiety (see Five Part Model, Page 2); they
happen all of the time and are difficult to control. Mindfulness works by allowing us to view our
thoughts in a more objective, or non-judgmental way. Mindfully noticing our thoughts can be looked at
as the first step in recognizing the connection between our thoughts and our feelings or our behaviours,
and also as a way to minimize the impact of negative emotions attached to harmful or anxious thoughts.
Mindfulness is in no way a new concept. Mindfulness originates from Buddhist meditative practices. Its
conception dates back thousands of years; however, mindfulness is not necessarily religious or spiritual
in its nature. Recently, mindfulness has been incorporated into Western medicine practices as an
effective tool for improving mental health. This movement was largely the result of Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, a
former molecular biologist from MIT, who sparked interest in the medical applications of this practice.
As a result, the past few decades have produced a vast amount of scientific research demonstrating the
effectiveness of mindfulness as a treatment for the management of anxiety, depression, pain, and even
sexual dysfunction. This isnt a magic cure-all, but instead, we are starting to learn that mindfulness
improves peoples mental health by providing people a tool to manage their thoughts, which, as you
know, play a key role in anxiety. Even brain-imaging studies have been used to show that people who
undergo short-term mindfulness training programs experience increases in brain matter, more
activation in the brain region associated with positive affect, and improved immune functioning. That is,
only now is science starting to acknowledge what the Buddhist monks knew all along: mindfulness can
help improve our thinking, our mood, and our overall health!
So how does mindfulness work? The neurons in our brains are constantly firing, which means that our
minds are constantly thinking. How do you just turn it off? The answer is: you dont. Instead, you learn
to simply observe the thoughts as they happen, observe any feelings that may be attached to those
thoughts, and then actively bring your attention back to the present. To illustrate: Imagine that it is a
beautiful summer day and you are lying in the soft grass on top of a hill watching the clouds go by. Each
thought that you have is like a passing cloud. You watch it as it passes, but you dont get caught up in all
of the intricate details of the cloud, or get swept away by whatever feelings come to mind when you see
that cloud. Instead, you simply notice the cloud and allow it to pass as you continue to stare into the sky.
More clouds will come, and thats ok. You simply acknowledge them, and let them pass gently by.
There are many different mindfulness exercises. You will need to find what practice works best for you.
In the beginning, staying present in the moment can be a difficult task, especially if you are someone
who tends to have lots of anxious (worrying) thoughts! Below, we outline three simple mindfulness
techniques. Get a feel for which is right for you, and remember that there are many other alterative
mindfulness exercises out there.
Getting Started
4. Pick a point of focus. This could be anything, for example a short saying or mantra (e.g., I am
good; I am enough; everything is ok), or your breath. Breath is a very common point of
focus in mindfulness because it is constant, rhythmic, and it is always present.
5. Slowly ease yourself into your practice. Spend about one minute simply brining awareness to
yourself, giving your mind the opportunity to settle in to its practice. What sensations do you
notice in your body? Do you have the urge to fidget? Is there anything around or within you that
is calling your attention to it? Simply notice these things without attaching any labels or values
to them.
6. Bring your attention to your point of focus. Actively bring you attention to your point of focus
with the intention of keeping yourself in the present moment. That is, if your breath is your
point of focus, simply pay attention to the sensation of air moving in through your nostrils,
down your throat, notice as the air fills your lungs and as your chest and belly expand. Dont do
anything to change your breath, simply sit with it. Notice when you mind begins to wander and
simply bring your attention back to your point of focus when this happens.
7. Bring your attention back to your point of focus. Know that your mind will wander. Simply
recognize when this happens and try to use non-judgment to bring your attention back to your
point of focus. Try to observe your thoughts with a passive curiosity, but do not get caught up in
the emotions that may be attached to those thoughts. Bring your focus back to your point of
focus. Thoughts will come and that is ok. Simply acknowledge where you mind has wandered
each time, and bring your focus back each time.
8. Bring your attention back to your point of focus some more. In the beginning it may feel like
you are doing this a lot. Thats ok. Our mind is used to jumping all over the place; this is
especially true for people who tend to be anxious. This is why we call it a mindfulness practice. It
takes time to develop the skill.
Option 2: Grounding
In this option, you will use your five senses to bring yourself into the present moment and sustain this
mindful presence.
Getting Started
3. You will begin with your sense of sight. Take note of five things that you can see around you.
Spend a moment really noticing each of the five things that you see. What colour is each object?
What texture does it have? How is the light hitting it? Is it moving or stationary? Acknowledge
each sensation with passive acceptance.
4. Next, take note of five things that you can hear around you. Feel free to close your eyes if this
will help you be more present with each sound. Notice what you notice about each sound. Is the
sound loud? Is it pleasant or unpleasant? What quality does the sound have? Sit with each
sensation for a moment, just noticing them.
5. Now take note of five things that you can feel, just where you are. Perhaps you can feel your
body resting on a chair or pillow? Is there a breeze where you are? What is the temperature
like? Are there any internal sensations, from inside of your body that you can notice? Just be
aware of these sensations, as you sit with each sensation in turn.
6. Finally, notice five things that you can smell and/or taste. Is this sensation strong or subtle?
Pleasant or unpleasant or neutral? Simply notice and sit with each sensation before you move
onto the next one.
Getting Started
3. Bring your attention to what you are doing in the present moment. For example, if you have
chosen to walk, bring your attention to all of the physical sensations of walking. Notice as you
lift one foot in the air and feel each muscle and tendon as you swing that leg forward. Bring your
attention to the pad of your foot as it touches down on the ground. What part of your foot
touches the ground first? What does the sensation of the weight of your body feel like coming
down on your foot? On your leg? On your hip? What is happening to the other foot? At what
point does the heel of your other foot come off the ground? What is happening to your hands
and your arms? What does the contrast feel like between the left and the right side of your body
at any given moment?
4. As you keep your attention on the physical sensations of the activity of your choice, remember
to notice where your thoughts are. When you thoughts move away from the present moment
and they willacknowledge this and simply bring them back to the moment. Notice if emotions
are attached to those thoughts, but do not get engaged in those feelings; simply notice them as
if you would notice clouds in the sky and gently bring your focus back to your activity and the
present moment.
Getting Started
4. Tensing. In order to truly relax each muscle group, you will first need to tense it as hard as you
can. This is so that your body can recognize the contrast between tense and relaxed muscles.
You will go in order from the tip of your toes to the top of your head (see page 29 for a full list of
the muscle groups to focus on in your PMR exercise). Make sure that you are isolating your
tension to only one muscle group at a time; dont let the tension seep into another muscle
group. For example, if you are tensing your chest, make sure that your shoulders are not
creeping up to your ears. Watch that your jaw is not tensing with other muscle groups, as well (it
has a tendency to do that!).
As you tense each muscle group, focus on all of the sensations your body creates. Tease apart all
of the feelings. Does it feel warm? Cold? Does the muscle feel strong? Is the muscle shaking?
What values do you place on these feelings? Does it feel pleasant or not so nice? Stay with all of
the feelings. Remember to squeeze as hard as you can for the entire time you are tensing the
muscle group, but not so hard that it causes serious pain or injury. Continue to hold the tension
for about 10 seconds.
5. Relaxing. Once you are done tensing, completely let go of all tension. Let that body part drop
back down or feel that body part sink deeper into the chair/couch/floor that its resting on.
Imagine that all of the tension is flowing out of that muscle group like water (e.g., picture the
tension dripping from your fingertips, or flowing down your legs to the floor). Focus on the new
sensations that your body creates as the tension seeps out of that muscle group. See if you can
contrast the feelings of relaxation with the sensations you experienced when the muscles were
tense. What temperature is the muscle group now? What values would you place on the
feelings now? Continue to release all tension for about 15 seconds (longer than the time you
tensed it).
6. Repeat. Follow the same format for each muscle group in order from your toes to your head.
Use the list below, and tense each muscle group one at a time. Remember to keep the tension
isolated just to a single muscle group.
7. Final check. Once youve gone through flexing and relaxing all of the muscle groups, scan your
body one last time. Is there any area that is still holding tension? If so, repeat the tensing and
relaxing procedure a final time on those muscle groups. Once all of your body is feeling relaxed,
take the remainder of your 15-30 minutes to sit with this sensation of full-body relaxation. Note
if tension starts to creep into any muscle group and repeat the tense/relax procedures.
Otherwise, sit with the feeling of relaxation. Be as present in your body as you can be. Enjoy.
Worry Time
Everyone experiences worries at one point or another, but sometimes those worries can start to get in
the way of other things. Worrying can act like a chain reaction: one worrying thought pops up, which
tends to bring a different worrying thought, and that is attached to a number of additional worrying
thoughts. Worry tends to increase in response to two different situations: (1) When we have a particular
thing that is making us anxious (e.g., an upcoming exam); or (2) When our over-all anxiety is high.
Worrying maintains or increases our anxiety, and it can eat up a lot of time and energy.
Thoughts tend to come up as if theyre acting of their own accord. No one enjoys having worrying
thoughts, but we all have them on occasion. Worry Time is a tool that gives you permission to worry in a
controlled way, so that the worrying thoughts that pop up over the course of a day can be dealt with,
instead of allowing them to eat up more than their share of your precious time and energy. Heres how
it works:
Getting Started
4. Sit down with a pen and paper, or open up a new word processing document on your computer.
Once your timer starts, begin writing down all of your worries. Use this time to worry your heart
out! There is no worry too big or too small for Worry Time.
5. When the timer goes off, stop! Turn the paper over or take your hands away from the keyboard.
Some people do not like to hold onto their worries, so feel free to rip up that paper or close the
document without saving. That is it; the end of your Worry Time.
6. Try to immerse yourself in a different activity as soon as you can, in order to help prevent your
mind from continuing on the trail of some of those worrying thoughts.
7. Throughout the day, if a worrying thought comes up for you, take note. Tell yourself ok, that is
something I will need to worry about in Worry Time tonight. If it helps, you can even write that
thought down on a notepad or in your phone to remember for Worry Time.
Variation 1:
Instead of writing out your worries during Worry Time, you can talk them out. If you have a trusted
person who wouldnt mind sitting with you and quietly listen to you vent, you can use them as a
sounding board. Its not necessary for this person to provide feedback (in fact, this person should be
silent during your Worry Time). This is a chance for you to get your worries out, not work them out!
Alternatively, you can talk your worries out to yourself, if that would be easier for you.
Time Management
When we dont have very effective time management strategies it can seem as if its impossible to fit in
the millions of assignments and readings that need to be finished before their due dates. Naturally, this
leads to an increase in stress and anxiety. Managing your time is a skill thatwhen done effectively
can decrease the sensation of overwhelm by developing a strategy to manage the various tasks that
often build up day-to-day.
The use of a well thought out schedule decreases the amount of pressure for individual tasks, and
crossing items off the (do-able!) to-do list garners an incredible sense of achievement that can help to
counteract anxiety. By practicing and developing the skill of Time Management, you will be setting
yourself up for success in your studies. Properly navigating the time that you do have can increase your
productivity, which affords you more energy to devote to the tasks that you truly enjoy (and, in turn,
helps decrease overall levels of stress)! The wonderful part about learning Time Management skills is
that you will be able to use these skills throughout the rest of your lifein jobs, with family, and even in
relationships.
Steps in managing your time:
2. Prioritize
Write down everything that you have to do. Once this list is complete, take a look at all of the things that
need to get done. Note that seeing your entire to-do list on one page may increase your stress levels
slightly at first, but it will be worth it in the end! By writing a list of everything you have to do, it allows
you to plan the order to complete the tasks in a logical way that will most benefit you (i.e., prioritize!).
Typically, you will want to deal with the most urgent and important items first. Once these big ticket
items are completed, your stress should decrease, which makes it easier to complete the rest of your
list.
In order to help decide which task needs doing first, use the following table to break up which items are
urgent, which are important, and which are both (or neither). Items that are urgent and important
should be at the top of your list. Ideally, you are aiming to minimize the number of urgent tasks you
have, and mostly focus on important tasks. Typically, we define important as having at least one of the
following characteristics:
1. Its a challenge
2. Completing it will put you ahead in some way
3. You are the only person who can do it
Use the following table to prioritize your to-do list according to the important/urgent criteria. You can
also find this table in Appendix B (Worksheet 2.3 Time Management: Prioritizing Your To-Do List)
Not urgent
Urgent
Important
Remember that you have 168 hours every weekminus those hours during which you are sleeping, of
course. Thats still quite a bit of time, and sometimes seeing how much space there is can lessen the
overwhelm!
Using the blank schedule in Appendix B (Worksheet 2.2 Time Management: Scheduling Your Time); start
by filling in those items that you cannot change, for example lectures and fixed appointments. Take a
look at your schedule now and consider all of the free spaces you have! Fill in the rest of the schedule
according to your priorities. Dont forget to include downtime/SPEMS, and time for a good nights sleep.
Remember that its okay (and actually quite necessary) to have unplanned or white space, too.
Is the timing that Ive laid out appropriate? Am I better at doing certain tasks at certain times of
the day?
If I was an employer, would I pay myself to do what Im doing/want to do?
Put things into perspectivewhat will the impact of my decision be five minutes from now? Five
hours? Five days? Five years?
If you are still having difficulties choosing between various priorities, have a look at the Decisional
Balance Tool, found on page 34 and in Appendix B (Worksheet 2.4 Decision Making: Decisional Balance
Sheet).
5. Ensure Accountability
Many people will get through the above steps, pat themselves on the back, walk away feeling great
about their Time Management skills and never end up completing any of the plans that they set out to
do! This is because they may be lacking accountability. Accountability is something (or someone) that
will ensure you will actually complete the tasks that you have set out to do. Everybody is held
accountable in different ways. For some people, it is enough to have a to-do list, because those people
are able to stay accountable to themselves; however, these people are the exception, not the rule. Most
of us need something more. Maybe its having a friend or family member call and check in, or maybe its
setting up a game between classmates with challenges and rewards. How do you stay accountable?
6. Be Adaptable!
This is much easier said than done, but it is important to remember that no matter how much effort
weve put into planning and managing our time, unexpected things always come up. Remember: its
okay to change your schedule, even if the reason is outside of your control. If some things on your list
dont get completed as a result of schedule changes, there is literally another 168 hours waiting for you
next week!
Some additional tips or strategies that students often find helpful in managing their time and becoming
motivated:
If to-do lists dont work for you, try making a not-to-do list. Figure out what things you do that are
not helping (e.g., things you do to procrastinate), and tell yourself that you will not do them for a
certain period of time. For example, I will not go on any social media sites from 6:00-8:00pm
tonight.
Try the five-minute rule. Starting on a task is often the most difficult part of the process, so rather
than looking at it as multiple hours of work, set a timer for just five minutes. Start the task and fully
devote yourself to working on the task for those five minutes. When the timer rings, give yourself
permission to stop. But if you are motivated to keep going, then continue! Remember, if you find
yourself not wanting to continue, thats fine. At the very least, you still have completed five minutes
worth of work!
Try to find ways to build up motivation over the long-term. Often times, once weve started
working we can stay motivated for a while, but trying to get re-started after taking a break
whether it be a few minutes or a few dayscan be very challenging. If you are taking a short break,
try to keep your motivation going by stopping for your break five or ten minutes before you run out
of steam. If you work until you are completely out of steam every time, it will very difficult to get
back to work after a break. Alternatively, if youre taking a longer break (e.g., youre finishing up for
the night and plan to keep working in the morning), consider leaving yourself a fun or engaging
task to start up with after your long break. This way, you will be more motivated to start working
tomorrow compared to if you stopped right before a task you really dont enjoy.
Routine is very importantand helpful! Train your brain to know that certain times of the day are
study times, and other times are relaxation times. The more you can keep up a similar schedule, the
easier tasks become. Having a routine lets you go into auto-pilot mode, which takes away a lot of
the decision-making that anxious people find so difficult, and therefore frees up a lot of time and
valuable mental energy!
Discover your productivity helpers. For those activities you must do yourself, find ways to be as
efficient as you can, that is, your productivity helpers. How can you take the pressure off of
yourself as much as possible? For example, create reusable templates for anything that you do
repeatedly, or write out study notes now so you have them ready during exam time. Your time is
your most valuable resourcedont squander it.
Decision Making
Making decisions can be challenging for anybody, but anxiety can make it even more difficult. Anxiety
often comes in the form of the fear of the unknown. In order to minimize anxiety, its not uncommon to
try to plan for every possible outcome (see Chapter 3 on GAD, page 53). The problem is that planning for
all possible outcomes can be incredibly overwhelming, and often cripple our ability to make a decision.
Alternatively, it may just be easier to avoid the situation all together, and not make a decision at all.
Below is a tool to help evaluate your options in order to make a decision; its called a Decisional Balance
Tool. This tool can be used for big decisions (e.g., What do I want to major in?; Should I take this parttime job?), or smaller decisions (What do I want to eat for lunch?; Should I go out with friends
tonight, or stay in and study?).
Example
Andria is in her second year of BioChem, and is very unhappy with her program so far. She is
considering changing into Philosophy, because she believes that she will enjoy it more, but she is
having a very difficult time making this decision. Andria uses a Decisional Balance Sheet to work
through this tough decision.
Options:
Benefits:
Costs:
In the back of this workbook, you will find a handout with a full-sized Decisional Balance Sheet
(Appendix B, Worksheet 2.4 Decision Making: Decisional Balance Sheet). Use this handout to tackle a
decision that you are struggling with now. Write down all possible options first, and then take some time
to explore the benefits and costs of each option. At the bottom of the handout there is a space to write
the decision that you come to. Be sure to fill this out when you have completed the Decisional Balance
Sheet.
In order to go through this process, we use a widely-used tool called a Thought Record. The Thought
Record helps us to articulate our anxious thoughts, and then walks us through a process of inquiry to
question those thoughts. Finally, the Thought Record helps us to create a list of calmer, more balanced
and reasonable ways of thinking about ourselves and our situation.
In the following section, you will find step-by-step instructions for how to complete your own Thought
Record. Sample Thought Records will be included in subsequent chapters so that you can look at case
examples for the specific type of anxiety you are experiencing. In addition, there are two versions of the
blank Thought Record template in Appendix B for your use; one version is two pages (Worksheet 2.5a
Thought Record (2 page version)), for when you have a lot on your mind; the second version is a single
page (Worksheet 2.5b Thought Record (1 page version)), for quicker Thought Records.
Here is a list of the most common Anxious Thought Distortions. See if you can recognize your own
anxious thinking in any of these:
1. Catastrophizing. This is probably the most common Anxious Thought Distortion. Catastrophizing
occurs when your anxiety leads you to focus on and worry about the worst possible outcome of
a given situation. Typically, people begin by worrying about some concerning aspect of their
situation, then a snowball effect occurs in which one anxious thought leads to an even worse
anxious thought, and so on, until finally they are worrying about the worst possible case
scenario, which they then anxiously focus on. This leads us to the next Thought Distortion.
2. Overestimating Probability. When we anxiously worry about the worst possible outcome, we
also tend to vastly overestimate the statistical probability of the worst thing happening. In life,
terrible things usually only happen rarely. Most of the time things work out fine, or when we
encounter difficulties we are able to resolve them. When we are anxious, we tend to believe
that the worst possible outcome is very likely to occur when in fact, usually, it is statistically very
unlikely to occur.
3. Perfectionism. Perfectionistic thoughts drive us to always do more or be better. There is nothing
wrong with striving for excellence, but perfectionistic thought distortions are extreme,
unrelenting, and unreasonable. Perfectionism tells us that we are never good enough, we arent
doing enough, and we arent allowed to make mistakes. Perfectionistic thoughts often start with
I should or I have to.
4. Focusing on only the Negatives. Anxious thoughts tend to be (no surprise here) very negative.
Anxiety drives scary thoughts about ourselves and the world. In the process, we lose sight of
positive aspects of ourselves, our abilities, and our experiences in the world. We need to take a
step back and look at the whole picturewhich usually includes both negative and positive.
5. Predicting the Future. This is also sometimes called Fortune Telling. When we are anxious we
tend to start having What If? thoughts. What if this bad thing happens or that bad thing
happens? We get into a mindset where we are predicting what will happen and then we start
believing our own predictions as though they are reality. We need to remind ourselves that we
cant know what the future will bring, and reassure ourselves that its okay to be in a state of
openness and not knowing.
6. Generalizing. Generalizing happens when we believe that something will happen in a particular
way because it has happened that way before. Because I failed my Christmas exam in this
course I know Im going to fail the final. Just because something has happened badly once
doesnt mean it will necessarily happen that way again. This is especially true if you are using
new skills, such as Basic Anxiety Management Skills. Circumstances may have changed or be
different now. It is important to look realistically at the unique aspects of each situation.
7. Underestimating Your Ability to Cope. The fact is that, occasionally, bad or difficult things do
happen to us in life. We cant prevent all bad things from ever happening. The question is how
do we cope or handle it when something difficult or upsetting does occur? This Anxious
Thought Distortion tells us that we couldnt handle it, that we would fall apart, die of
embarrassment, or lose everything if something bad happened. But studies have shown that, on
average, people are much better at coping with terrible events than even they expect. Handling
difficult life experiences can help people to discover their own inner strengths, receive support
from others they didnt know they had, and learn important lessons in their lives. When bad
things happen, we cope, we grow, and others rise up to help us. Try asking yourself What
would I do if my worst fear happened?; How would I handle it?; What are my options?
8. Mind Reading. We Mind Read when we imagine that we know what someone else is thinking,
for example: She thinks I did a terrible job on my presentation. Once we assume we know
what others are thinking or feeling we start worrying and become anxious about that. People
think all kinds of things; none of us can possibly know what someone else is thinking. Also, we
cant control what people think about us; often what others think is filtered through their own
subjective perspective. Have you ever thought something not so great about someone else? Is it
possible to do that but still absolutely like the person? Of course it is! Practice letting go of
worrying about something you cant control: other peoples thoughts.
Is the Hot Thought true? Is it always true? Is it partially true? Are there ways in which it is not
true? Are there times when it is not true?
What is the evidence to support the Hot Thought? What is the evidence against it?
If you had to debate this thought or make a counterargument against it, what would you say?
Is there another way of looking at this?
Whats the bigger picture?
If you are catastrophizing, what is the probability of this thought actually happening? If your
feared outcome does happen, how terrible would it be? Could you handle it, figure out how to
move on with your life?
What would a good friend say to you about your perspective on this?
Are there kinder, more respectful ways of thinking about yourself in your life that allow you to
be a human being who makes mistakes, with strengths and limitations?
Then, using these questions as guides, write down your new insights and alternative perspectives in
Column 3.
Thought ..
1. Anxious/Negative Thoughts:
1. Anxious/Negative Thoughts:
Record
3. Balanced/Realistic Self-Talk:
(use the questions below)
3. Balanced/Realistic Self-Talk:
(Ask yourself)
Is the Hot Thought true? Is it always true? Is it partially true? Are there ways in which it is
not true? Are there times when it is not true?
What is the evidence to support the Hot Thought? What is the evidence against it?
If you had to debate this thought or make a counterargument against it, what would you
say?
If you are catastrophizing, what is the probability of this thought actually happening? If
your feared outcome does happen, how terrible would it be? Could you handle it, figure
out how to move on with your life?
Are there kinder, more respectful ways of thinking about yourself in your life that allow
you to be a human being who makes mistakes, with strengths and limitations?
Behavioural Experiments
Keep in mind the Five Part Model (page 2), and how multiple factors impact anxiety. One tool that uses
this model to manage anxiety is the Behavioural Experiment, which helps create more balanced, healthy
thoughts by targeting your behaviour. Behavioural Experiments can be used in two different ways: (1)
To test out an anxious thought in order to help build up evidence against that thought; or (2) To build up
evidence in favour of a new, balanced alternative thought after filling out a Thought Record.
To illustrate how Behavioural Experiments work, think of your old, anxious thought as a comfort food,
like grandmas fried chicken. You know fried chicken isnt really good for you, but youve been eating it
for as long as you can remember and you cant see yourself without it. Now think of a helpful, balanced
thought as a healthy habit, like going to the gym. You know that going to the gym is much better for you
than grandmas fried chicken, but youre hesitant to move on: What if I dont know how to use the
machines at the gym and people laugh at me?; Im not in as good shape as other people at the gym,
theyre going to feel sorry for me; Im probably going to end up hurting myself; I dont think Ill like
the gym that much anyway. But soon you find a workout class that you enjoy and those anxious
thoughts suddenly hold less weight because you learn that they arent true. After going to the gym for a
few weeks you dont hurt yourself and you have no objective evidence to support that people feel sorry
for you. Eventually, you start to crave the post-workout high, and one day you may even choose a salad
over your grandmas grease-soaked poultry.
In the above example, the idea of going to the gym produced anxious thoughts predicting awful
outcomes about embarrassment or injuries. Behavioural Experiments help us learn that we never know
how things will turn out unless we test it out. Facing your fears is one of the most important skills you
can use for managing or even eliminating anxiety. Additionally, the creation of new, balanced alternative
thoughts may require some time and active practice before they become more believable, but
Behavioural Experiments offer us a way to buy into the new thoughts, like one might buy into a new
workout routine. So by testing out anxious thoughts (with behaviours), Behavioural Experiments help:
(1) Reduce or eliminate anxious thoughts (your brain wont want to hold onto the thoughts if you see
they arent accurate); and (2) Give more weight to balanced, alternative thoughts (your brain will want
to hold onto these thoughts if it sees they are more accurate). The more you expose yourself to these
Behavioural Experiments, the more effective they become. That is, repeated exposure to these
experiments helps condition our minds to accept new, more balanced ways of thinking. Behavioural
Experiments offer a safe, structured way to disprove worrisome thoughts and give more support to
balanced alternative thoughts!
Things to Remember
It is important to remember that changes in our thoughts do not happen right away. Sometimes it will
take many repeated Behavioural Experiments before you start to truly believe a new, healthy thought.
Be patient with yourself, but also consider using this as incentive to practice regularly.
Start small and work your way up. If you need to, you can break down your Behavioural Experiment into
multiple small experiments. With most of the skills we speak about in this workbook, you dont want to
set impossible goals for yourself or else you will just end up discouraged. If you are ever in doubt, make
your behavioural experiment smaller or easier than you think you can handle and work your way up
from there. This will help create a sense of accomplishment (just dont make the goals too small so as
not to make serious progress).
Problem-solving
What problems might come up during the
experiment?
How can you solve those problems?
Have you ever faced a problem like this in
the past? If so, how did you handle it?
What is your anxiety telling you to do?
Remember to consider Safety
Behaviours, or small, subtle things we do
to avoid anxiety. Dont forget to plan for
reducing those behaviours.
See if you can identify any Thinking Traps
popping up here, like overestimating
probability or mind-reading.
Outcome
After the behavioural experiment, write
down what actually happened
What I learned
Write down what you learned.
Re-rate how much you believe in the
original thought now.
I believe
this
thought
_30__%
This is a:
_x_ Balanced
alternative
thought
___
Anxious
thought
Problem-solving
What problems might come up during the
experiment?
How can you solve those problems?
Have you ever faced a problem like this in the past? If
so, how did you handle it?
What is your anxiety telling you to do? Remember to
consider Safety Behaviours, or small, subtle things
we do to avoid anxiety. Dont forget to plan for
reducing those behaviours.
See if you can identify any Thinking Traps popping up
here, like overestimating probability or mind-reading.
Outcome
After the behavioural experiment, write down what
actually happened
What I learned
Write down what you learned.
Re-rate how much you believe in the original thought
now.
Im going to say
something dumb and
everyone will think less of
me
I believe
this
thought
_95__%
This is a:
___
Balanced
alternative
thought
_x_
Anxious
thought
During our study group tomorrow night I will
purposefully answer a question wrong
I believe this
thought _80___%