To The One
To The One
To The One
THEONE
Elder Boyd K. Packer
....
Elder Boyd K. Packer was sustained in 1970 as a member of the Council of the Twelve of The .
Church of JesusChrist of Latter-day Saints. Previously he served as an Assistant to the Council of the
Twelve and, at one time, as president of the New England Mission. He is presently responsible for a
number of important Church programs, including the priesthood home teaching, family home evening, and military relations programs.
During World War II, Elder Packer was a bomber pilot . He holds bachelor's and master's degrees
from Utah State University and a doctora te in educational administrat ion from Brigham Young Un iversity. He has worked extensive ly in the Church Educational System, including the seminaries and
institutes of religion, having directed the development of the system of seminaries for Indian students throughout the country . He has been active in community affairs and served as a city councilma n. He has also authored several books.
He is married to Donna Smith. They have ten children.
This fire side addr ess was given in the Marriott Center at Brigham Young Un iversity on March 5,
1978.
... It grieveth me that I must use so much boldness of speech concerning you, before your wives
and your children, many of whose feelings are exceedingly tender and chaste and delicate before
God, which thing is pleasing unto God; . ..
But, notwithstanding the greatness of the task, I
must do according to the strict command s of God,
and tell you concerning your wickedness and
abominations, in the pr esence of the pure in heart,
and the broken heart, and under the glance of the
_piercing eye of the Almighty God . (Jacob 2:7, 10)
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Boyd K. Packer
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To the One
perts refer to the pages written by those who
are assigned to do corrective work, rather than
to the instruction provided by the Maker who
created us.
When we understand the fundamental moral law better than we do, we will be able to
correct this condition routinely. The solution
to this problem rests with the "thou shalts"
and the "thou shalt nots."
If someone is heavily involved in perversion,
it becomes very important to him to believe
that it is incurable. Can you not see that those
who preach that doctrine do so to justify
themselves? Some who become tangled up in
this disorder become predators. They proselyte the young or the inexperienced. It becomes very important for them to believe that
everyone, to one degree or another, is "that
way." You hear them claiming that a large percentage of the population is involved, in one
way or another, with this activity. Do not be
deceived. If you are one of the few who are
subject to this temptation, do not be misled
into believing that you are a captive to it. That
is false doctrine!
The third question is a very logical extension
of the other two: If it is wrong, and if it is not
incurable, how can it be corrected? What can
be done for someone who has had a few
thoughts in this direction? Or for one who has
experienced a long and ugly history of indulgence? How can they be helped?
First, understand that the power of procreation is good! It is the power to create life.
Think of that! The power to generate life given
to man! Through its employment a couple can
unselfishly bring children into the world. This
power becomes a binding tie in marriage.
Those who employ this power in complete
worthiness have the promise of eternal increase. Those who do not, face the possibility
that it will be withdrawn from them.
In marriage a couple can unselfishly express
their love to one another. They reap, as a result, a fulfillment and a completeness and a
knowledge of their identity as sons and
daughters of God.
The power of procreation is good-divinely
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scious one, at least not to begin with. I am
sure it is quite the opposite. Selfishness can attach itself to an individual without his being
aware that he is afflicted with it. It can become
imbedded so deeply and disguised so artfully
as to be almost indistinguishable.
It is hard to believe that any individual
would, by a clear, conscious decision or by a
pattern of them, choose a course of deviation.
It is much more subtle than that. If one could
even experiment with the possibility that selfishness of a very subtle nature may be the
cause of this disorder, that quickly clarifies
many things. It opens the possibility of putting
some very sick things in order.
The spiritual perspective for the cure of perversion emerges with the realization that the
physical power of creation or procreation is
different from every other part of our nature. It
is so devised that the only employment of it
calculated to bring happiness is in giving, not
in receiving. Consider this: One cannot procreate a/one. And this: One cannot procreate
with his own gender. These are absolutes. And
there is a third: One cannot procreate without
yielding or giving.
When one has the humility to admit that a
spiritual disorder is tied to perversion and that
selfishress rests at the root of it, already the
way is open to the treatment of the condition.
It is a painful admission indeed that selfishness
may be at the root of it, but we do not have
much evidence that one can cure perversion
by trying to cure perversion. If unselfishness
can effect a cure, we ought to be desperate
enough by now at least to experiment with the
possibility. I repeat, we have had very little
success in trying to remedy perversion by
treating perversion. It is very possible to cure it
by treating selfishness . .
Some individuals, entangled in perversion,
make a clear-cut decision to come out in the
open, to stay that way, and to plunge further
into it. That becomes a clear-cut act of selfishness. There is an inevitable result. From it
we learn something important. Any individual
is, of course, free to do that because each has
his agency but he cannot do that and produce
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any happiness for those who love him nor, ultimately, for himself.
There are bonds of love that tie human
beings together. How sad when signals of love
are sent across this network of communication
from one human being to another and there
comes back in return static, rejection, heartbreak, and agony! That kind of signal generates very quickly from selfishness. That is a
selfish signal.
Individuals guilty of very selfish acts inevitably hurt those around them. No person ever
made a conscious decision to make unnatural
behavior his life-style without sending brutal,
destructive, selfish signals to those who love
him.
If you cannot understand perversion-and I
admit that I cannot understand it-you can understand unselfishness and selfishness. And
you can learn to cure perversion.
Now, before we go any further, let me point
out that anything can be perverted-even unselfishness. So don't come up with some rationalization that participation in an act of sexual deviation is a generous and an unselfish
gesture. Don't claim that it is an unselfish thing
to relieve the craving of someone who is similarly affected. Any thinking soul ought to
know better than that. And don't argue that in
natural relationships, even in marriage, there
can be complete and brutal selfishness. That
may be true, but that is not our subject. And in
any case, that is no justification for any immoral or selfish act of any kind.
The admission that one may suffer from
selfishness cuts to the very quick. That is how
deep the cut must be to repair many physical
disorders. And yet our hospitals are full to
overflowing with patients. They count it quite
worthwhile to submit to treatment, however
painful. They struggle through long periods of
recuperation and sometimes must be content
with a limited life-style thereafter, in some
cases in order just to live. Is it not reasonable
that recuperation from this disorder might be
somewhat comparable? If unselfishness can
cure it-if it has to be applied for a long period
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of time, and thereafter continually-is it not
worth it?
We can do many things that are very personal, but these need not be selfish. For instance, it need not be a selfish thing to study
and improve your mind, to develop your talents, or to perfect the physical body. These
can be very unselfish if the motive is ultimately
to bless others. But there is something different about the power of procreation. There is
something that has never been fully explained
that makes it dangerous indeed to regard it as
something given to us, for us.
Now I hope I will not disappoint you too
much if I say at once that I do not know of any
quick spiritual cure-all. Setting aside miracles
for the moment, in which I firmly believe, generally I do not know of some spiritual shock
treatment that will sear the soul of an individual and instantly kill this kind of temptationor any other kind, for that matter. No spiritual
wonder drug that I know of will do it. The
cure rests in following for a long period of
time, and thereafter continually, some very
basic, simple rules for moral and spiritual
health. A lesson from the prophet Elisha is in
order here.
Naaman was the general of the Syrian army.
"He was also a mighty man in valour, but-he
was a leper." There was in his house a slave
girl from Israel. She told of prophets in Israel
who "would recover him of his leprosy." The
king of Syria, wanting to save his valued general, sent a letter to the king of Israel saying that
he had sent Naaman, "that thou mayest recover him of his leprosy."
The king of Israel was frightened and said,
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Am I God, to kill and to make alive, that this
man doth send unto me to recover a man of
his leprosy?" Elisha heard of the letter and told
the king, "Let him come now to me, and he
shall know that there is a prophet in Israel."
When Naaman arrived, Elisha sent a messenger to him saying, "Go and wash in Jordan
seven times, and thy flesh shall come again to
thee, and thou shalt be clean."
At this Naaman was furious. He thought he
would at least come out and "call on the
To the One
moral way. You will know, then, where you
are going. Ahead is but the struggle to get
there.
Do not try merely to discard a bad habit or
a bad thought. Replace it. When you try to
eliminate a bad habit, if the spot where ir used
to be is left open it will sneak back and crawl
again into that empty space. It grew there; it
will struggle to stay there. When you discard
it, fill up the spot where it was. Replace it with
something good. Replace it with unselfish
thoughts, with unselfish acts. Then, if an evil
habit or addiction tries to return, it will have to
fight for attention. Sometimes it may win. Bad
thoughts often have to be evicted a hundred
times, or a thousand. But if they have to be
evicted ten thousand times, never surrender to
them. You are in charge of you. I repeat, it is
very, very difficult to eliminate a bad habit just
by trying to discard it. Replace it. Read in Matthew, chapter 12, verses 43 to 45, the parable
of the empty house. There is a message in it
for you.
Now to you, the one, some very direct
counsel. If you are subject to this kind of
temptation, it is essential that you break all
connections with those who for one reason or
another encourage it. Do not go back to
places where you were tempted. Do not frequent those places where people with like
attractions gather. This may require an adjustment socially, occupationally, even geographically.
If you are involved in a liaison, no matter
how innocent it may appear, break it up right
now. Some things tie you to this kind of temptation. Quit them. Avoid the very appearance
of evil. This may be very painful if you are entangled in a relationship with deep emotional
ties. Cut those ties and encourage the other
person to do likewise. Get it done soon, and
get it done completely and finally.
Freedom from this kind of enslavement is
up a trail that an individual must walk alone. If
you stumble, get up and move on. Soon your
bruises will heal. You will grow stronger. Your
battle is two-thirds won, or three.fourths or
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